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Silas Marner
“A child, more than all other gifts
That earth can offer to declining man,
Brings hope with it, and forward-looking thoughts.”
—WORDSWORTH.
“A child, more than all other gifts
That the earth can offer to a struggling man,
Brings hope and optimistic thoughts.”
—WORDSWORTH.
Contents
CHAPTER I.
In the days when the spinning-wheels hummed busily in the farmhouses—and even great ladies, clothed in silk and thread-lace, had their toy spinning-wheels of polished oak—there might be seen in districts far away among the lanes, or deep in the bosom of the hills, certain pallid undersized men, who, by the side of the brawny country-folk, looked like the remnants of a disinherited race. The shepherd’s dog barked fiercely when one of these alien-looking men appeared on the upland, dark against the early winter sunset; for what dog likes a figure bent under a heavy bag?—and these pale men rarely stirred abroad without that mysterious burden. The shepherd himself, though he had good reason to believe that the bag held nothing but flaxen thread, or else the long rolls of strong linen spun from that thread, was not quite sure that this trade of weaving, indispensable though it was, could be carried on entirely without the help of the Evil One. In that far-off time superstition clung easily round every person or thing that was at all unwonted, or even intermittent and occasional merely, like the visits of the pedlar or the knife-grinder. No one knew where wandering men had their homes or their origin; and how was a man to be explained unless you at least knew somebody who knew his father and mother? To the peasants of old times, the world outside their own direct experience was a region of vagueness and mystery: to their untravelled thought a state of wandering was a conception as dim as the winter life of the swallows that came back with the spring; and even a settler, if he came from distant parts, hardly ever ceased to be viewed with a remnant of distrust, which would have prevented any surprise if a long course of inoffensive conduct on his part had ended in the commission of a crime; especially if he had any reputation for knowledge, or showed any skill in handicraft. All cleverness, whether in the rapid use of that difficult instrument the tongue, or in some other art unfamiliar to villagers, was in itself suspicious: honest folk, born and bred in a visible manner, were mostly not overwise or clever—at least, not beyond such a matter as knowing the signs of the weather; and the process by which rapidity and dexterity of any kind were acquired was so wholly hidden, that they partook of the nature of conjuring. In this way it came to pass that those scattered linen-weavers—emigrants from the town into the country—were to the last regarded as aliens by their rustic neighbours, and usually contracted the eccentric habits which belong to a state of loneliness.
In the days when spinning wheels were busy in farmhouses—and even noble ladies, dressed in silk and lace, had their toy spinning wheels made of polished oak—there could be seen in distant areas among the lanes, or deep in the hills, some pale, undersized men who, next to the strong country folks, looked like the remnants of an outcast race. The shepherd’s dog barked fiercely when one of these foreign-looking men showed up on the hillside, silhouetted against the early winter sunset; after all, what dog likes a figure hunched under a heavy bag?—and these pale men rarely went out without that mysterious burden. The shepherd himself, even though he had good cause to believe that the bag contained nothing but flaxen thread or long rolls of strong linen made from that thread, couldn’t shake the feeling that this weaving trade, essential though it was, might require some help from the Devil. Back in those days, superstition easily clung to anyone or anything that was even a bit unusual or sporadic, like the visits from a peddler or knife grinder. No one knew where these wandering men came from or where they belonged; and how could you explain a man unless you at least knew someone who knew his parents? To the peasants of earlier times, the world beyond their direct experience was a hazy and mysterious place: in their untraveled minds, the idea of wandering was as unclear as the winter lives of the swallows that returned with spring; and even a settler, if he hailed from far-off places, was often met with a lingering distrust, which would have made any crime he committed unsurprising—especially if he had any reputation for knowledge or displayed skill in craftsmanship. All cleverness, whether in the quick use of the tricky instrument that is the tongue, or in some unfamiliar craft, was inherently suspicious: honest folks, who were visibly born and raised in the area, were typically not overly clever—at least not beyond knowing the signs of the weather; and the way that speed and skill were gained was so entirely obscure that it seemed almost magical. This is how it happened that those scattered linen weavers—migrants from the city to the countryside—were ultimately seen as outsiders by their rural neighbors and often developed the eccentric habits that come with isolation.
In the early years of this century, such a linen-weaver, named Silas Marner, worked at his vocation in a stone cottage that stood among the nutty hedgerows near the village of Raveloe, and not far from the edge of a deserted stone-pit. The questionable sound of Silas’s loom, so unlike the natural cheerful trotting of the winnowing-machine, or the simpler rhythm of the flail, had a half-fearful fascination for the Raveloe boys, who would often leave off their nutting or birds’-nesting to peep in at the window of the stone cottage, counterbalancing a certain awe at the mysterious action of the loom, by a pleasant sense of scornful superiority, drawn from the mockery of its alternating noises, along with the bent, tread-mill attitude of the weaver. But sometimes it happened that Marner, pausing to adjust an irregularity in his thread, became aware of the small scoundrels, and, though chary of his time, he liked their intrusion so ill that he would descend from his loom, and, opening the door, would fix on them a gaze that was always enough to make them take to their legs in terror. For how was it possible to believe that those large brown protuberant eyes in Silas Marner’s pale face really saw nothing very distinctly that was not close to them, and not rather that their dreadful stare could dart cramp, or rickets, or a wry mouth at any boy who happened to be in the rear? They had, perhaps, heard their fathers and mothers hint that Silas Marner could cure folks’ rheumatism if he had a mind, and add, still more darkly, that if you could only speak the devil fair enough, he might save you the cost of the doctor. Such strange lingering echoes of the old demon-worship might perhaps even now be caught by the diligent listener among the grey-haired peasantry; for the rude mind with difficulty associates the ideas of power and benignity. A shadowy conception of power that by much persuasion can be induced to refrain from inflicting harm, is the shape most easily taken by the sense of the Invisible in the minds of men who have always been pressed close by primitive wants, and to whom a life of hard toil has never been illuminated by any enthusiastic religious faith. To them pain and mishap present a far wider range of possibilities than gladness and enjoyment: their imagination is almost barren of the images that feed desire and hope, but is all overgrown by recollections that are a perpetual pasture to fear. “Is there anything you can fancy that you would like to eat?” I once said to an old labouring man, who was in his last illness, and who had refused all the food his wife had offered him. “No,” he answered, “I’ve never been used to nothing but common victual, and I can’t eat that.” Experience had bred no fancies in him that could raise the phantasm of appetite.
In the early years of this century, a linen weaver named Silas Marner worked at his trade in a stone cottage situated among the nutty hedgerows near the village of Raveloe, not far from the edge of an abandoned stone pit. The unusual sound of Silas’s loom, unlike the cheerful rhythm of the winnowing machine or the simpler beat of the flail, intrigued the boys of Raveloe, who would often pause their nut gathering or bird nesting to peek through the window of the stone cottage. They balanced a certain awe of the mysterious workings of the loom with a smug sense of superiority, coming from mocking its alternating noises and the bent, treadmill-like posture of the weaver. Occasionally, Marner would stop to fix an issue with his thread and notice the small troublemakers; though he valued his time, their presence annoyed him so much that he would step away from his loom, open the door, and give them a look that was enough to send them running in fear. After all, how could they believe that Silas Marner's large brown eyes, which bulged from his pale face, really saw anything clearly that wasn't right in front of them? They might have thought instead that his frightening gaze could somehow curse or cripple any boy who lingered too long. Perhaps they had heard their parents suggest that Silas Marner could cure people's rheumatism if he wanted, and even more ominously, that if you could just flatter him enough, he might save you the cost of a doctor. Such eerie echoes of old superstition might still be whispered among the grey-haired villagers, for the unrefined mind struggles to connect the ideas of power and kindness. The vague notion of a power that can be persuaded to avoid doing harm is the most common form of understanding the Invisible for people whose lives have been shaped by basic needs, and who have never experienced the light of fervent religious belief. To them, pain and misfortune seem to offer many more possibilities than joy and happiness; their imagination is nearly empty of the images that spark desire and hope, but is overrun by memories that constantly feed their fears. “Is there anything you can think of that you’d like to eat?” I once asked an old laborer nearing the end of his life, who had rejected all the food his wife had offered him. “No,” he replied, “I’m not used to anything but plain food, and I can’t eat that.” His experiences had given him no dreams that could stir the thought of appetite.
And Raveloe was a village where many of the old echoes lingered, undrowned by new voices. Not that it was one of those barren parishes lying on the outskirts of civilization—inhabited by meagre sheep and thinly-scattered shepherds: on the contrary, it lay in the rich central plain of what we are pleased to call Merry England, and held farms which, speaking from a spiritual point of view, paid highly-desirable tithes. But it was nestled in a snug well-wooded hollow, quite an hour’s journey on horseback from any turnpike, where it was never reached by the vibrations of the coach-horn, or of public opinion. It was an important-looking village, with a fine old church and large churchyard in the heart of it, and two or three large brick-and-stone homesteads, with well-walled orchards and ornamental weathercocks, standing close upon the road, and lifting more imposing fronts than the rectory, which peeped from among the trees on the other side of the churchyard:—a village which showed at once the summits of its social life, and told the practised eye that there was no great park and manor-house in the vicinity, but that there were several chiefs in Raveloe who could farm badly quite at their ease, drawing enough money from their bad farming, in those war times, to live in a rollicking fashion, and keep a jolly Christmas, Whitsun, and Easter tide.
And Raveloe was a village where many of the old sounds lingered, undrowned by new voices. It wasn’t one of those barren parishes on the outskirts of civilization—home to scrappy sheep and scattered shepherds. On the contrary, it was located in the rich central plain of what we like to call Merry England, and had farms that, from a spiritual perspective, paid highly-desirable tithes. But it was tucked away in a cozy wooded hollow, about an hour’s ride on horseback from any main road, where the sound of the coach horn or public opinion never reached. It was a notable village, with a beautiful old church and a large churchyard at its center, along with two or three sizeable brick-and-stone farmhouses, featuring well-walled orchards and decorative weather vanes, right next to the road, presenting a more impressive appearance than the rectory, which peeked out from among the trees on the other side of the churchyard: a village that showed the peaks of its social life and indicated to the practiced eye that there wasn’t a grand park and manor nearby, but that there were several folks in Raveloe who could farm poorly quite comfortably, making enough money from their bad farming during those war times to live in style and celebrate a merry Christmas, Whitsun, and Easter.
It was fifteen years since Silas Marner had first come to Raveloe; he was then simply a pallid young man, with prominent short-sighted brown eyes, whose appearance would have had nothing strange for people of average culture and experience, but for the villagers near whom he had come to settle it had mysterious peculiarities which corresponded with the exceptional nature of his occupation, and his advent from an unknown region called “North’ard”. So had his way of life:—he invited no comer to step across his door-sill, and he never strolled into the village to drink a pint at the Rainbow, or to gossip at the wheelwright’s: he sought no man or woman, save for the purposes of his calling, or in order to supply himself with necessaries; and it was soon clear to the Raveloe lasses that he would never urge one of them to accept him against her will—quite as if he had heard them declare that they would never marry a dead man come to life again. This view of Marner’s personality was not without another ground than his pale face and unexampled eyes; for Jem Rodney, the mole-catcher, averred that one evening as he was returning homeward, he saw Silas Marner leaning against a stile with a heavy bag on his back, instead of resting the bag on the stile as a man in his senses would have done; and that, on coming up to him, he saw that Marner’s eyes were set like a dead man’s, and he spoke to him, and shook him, and his limbs were stiff, and his hands clutched the bag as if they’d been made of iron; but just as he had made up his mind that the weaver was dead, he came all right again, like, as you might say, in the winking of an eye, and said “Good-night,” and walked off. All this Jem swore he had seen, more by token that it was the very day he had been mole-catching on Squire Cass’s land, down by the old saw-pit. Some said Marner must have been in a “fit,” a word which seemed to explain things otherwise incredible; but the argumentative Mr. Macey, clerk of the parish, shook his head, and asked if anybody was ever known to go off in a fit and not fall down. A fit was a stroke, wasn’t it? and it was in the nature of a stroke to partly take away the use of a man’s limbs and throw him on the parish, if he’d got no children to look to. No, no; it was no stroke that would let a man stand on his legs, like a horse between the shafts, and then walk off as soon as you can say “Gee!” But there might be such a thing as a man’s soul being loose from his body, and going out and in, like a bird out of its nest and back; and that was how folks got over-wise, for they went to school in this shell-less state to those who could teach them more than their neighbours could learn with their five senses and the parson. And where did Master Marner get his knowledge of herbs from—and charms too, if he liked to give them away? Jem Rodney’s story was no more than what might have been expected by anybody who had seen how Marner had cured Sally Oates, and made her sleep like a baby, when her heart had been beating enough to burst her body, for two months and more, while she had been under the doctor’s care. He might cure more folks if he would; but he was worth speaking fair, if it was only to keep him from doing you a mischief.
It had been fifteen years since Silas Marner first arrived in Raveloe; at that time, he was just a pale young man with noticeable, short-sighted brown eyes. His look wouldn't have seemed strange to people with average knowledge and experience, but for the villagers among whom he settled, he had mysterious traits that matched the unusual nature of his work and his arrival from a distant place known as “North’ard.” His lifestyle was equally peculiar—he didn't invite anyone to cross his threshold, nor did he wander into the village to grab a drink at the Rainbow or chat at the wheelwright’s. He sought no one, except for his professional needs or to buy essentials. It soon became clear to the Raveloe girls that he would never pressure any of them into marrying him—just as if they had openly declared they would never marry a dead man come back to life. This perception of Marner was based not just on his pale complexion and unusual eyes; Jem Rodney, the mole-catcher, claimed that one evening, as he was walking home, he saw Silas Marner leaning against a gate with a heavy bag on his back, instead of resting it on the gate like a sensible person would. When Jem approached him, he noticed Marner's eyes looked like a dead man's, and he spoke to him, shook him, and found his limbs stiff, with his hands gripping the bag as if they were made of iron. Just as Jem was convinced the weaver was dead, Marner came back to life, so to speak, in the blink of an eye, said “Good-night,” and walked away. Jem swore he saw this, especially since it was the very day he had been mole-catching on Squire Cass’s property, by the old saw-pit. Some folks speculated that Marner must have had a “fit,” a term that seemed to explain something otherwise unbelievable; but the logical Mr. Macey, the parish clerk, shook his head and asked if anyone had ever been known to have a fit without collapsing. A fit meant a stroke, didn’t it? And a stroke usually took away a person’s ability to move and could lead them to be a burden on the parish if they had no children to care for them. No, no; there was no stroke that would allow a man to stand on his feet like a horse hitched to a cart and then just walk off as soon as you could say “Gee!” But there was such a thing as a person’s spirit being separate from their body, moving in and out like a bird from its nest; and that’s how people became overly wise, attending lessons in this detached state from those who could teach them more than their neighbors could understand with just their five senses and the parson. And where did Master Marner get his knowledge of herbs—and charms too, if he decided to share them? Jem Rodney’s tale wasn’t more than what anyone might expect after seeing how Marner had cured Sally Oates, making her sleep peacefully when her heart had been racing like it would burst for two months or more, while she had been under the doctor’s care. He could likely help more people if he wanted to; but it was worth being polite to him, just to keep him from causing you harm.
It was partly to this vague fear that Marner was indebted for protecting him from the persecution that his singularities might have drawn upon him, but still more to the fact that, the old linen-weaver in the neighbouring parish of Tarley being dead, his handicraft made him a highly welcome settler to the richer housewives of the district, and even to the more provident cottagers, who had their little stock of yarn at the year’s end. Their sense of his usefulness would have counteracted any repugnance or suspicion which was not confirmed by a deficiency in the quality or the tale of the cloth he wove for them. And the years had rolled on without producing any change in the impressions of the neighbours concerning Marner, except the change from novelty to habit. At the end of fifteen years the Raveloe men said just the same things about Silas Marner as at the beginning: they did not say them quite so often, but they believed them much more strongly when they did say them. There was only one important addition which the years had brought: it was, that Master Marner had laid by a fine sight of money somewhere, and that he could buy up “bigger men” than himself.
It was partly due to this vague fear that Marner was protected from the persecution his quirks might have attracted, but even more so because the old linen-weaver in the neighboring parish of Tarley was dead. His skills made him a welcomed addition to the wealthier housewives in the area, and even to the more prudent cottagers who had their little stock of yarn at the end of the year. Their appreciation of his usefulness countered any reluctance or suspicion that might have arisen, as long as the quality and quantity of the cloth he wove for them met their expectations. The years went by without changing how the neighbors viewed Marner, except for a shift from novelty to familiarity. After fifteen years, the men of Raveloe said the same things about Silas Marner as they did at the beginning; they didn’t say them as often, but they believed them much more strongly when they did. There was only one significant addition over the years: that Master Marner had saved up a considerable amount of money somewhere and that he could outbuy “bigger men” than himself.
But while opinion concerning him had remained nearly stationary, and his daily habits had presented scarcely any visible change, Marner’s inward life had been a history and a metamorphosis, as that of every fervid nature must be when it has fled, or been condemned, to solitude. His life, before he came to Raveloe, had been filled with the movement, the mental activity, and the close fellowship, which, in that day as in this, marked the life of an artisan early incorporated in a narrow religious sect, where the poorest layman has the chance of distinguishing himself by gifts of speech, and has, at the very least, the weight of a silent voter in the government of his community. Marner was highly thought of in that little hidden world, known to itself as the church assembling in Lantern Yard; he was believed to be a young man of exemplary life and ardent faith; and a peculiar interest had been centred in him ever since he had fallen, at a prayer-meeting, into a mysterious rigidity and suspension of consciousness, which, lasting for an hour or more, had been mistaken for death. To have sought a medical explanation for this phenomenon would have been held by Silas himself, as well as by his minister and fellow-members, a wilful self-exclusion from the spiritual significance that might lie therein. Silas was evidently a brother selected for a peculiar discipline; and though the effort to interpret this discipline was discouraged by the absence, on his part, of any spiritual vision during his outward trance, yet it was believed by himself and others that its effect was seen in an accession of light and fervour. A less truthful man than he might have been tempted into the subsequent creation of a vision in the form of resurgent memory; a less sane man might have believed in such a creation; but Silas was both sane and honest, though, as with many honest and fervent men, culture had not defined any channels for his sense of mystery, and so it spread itself over the proper pathway of inquiry and knowledge. He had inherited from his mother some acquaintance with medicinal herbs and their preparation—a little store of wisdom which she had imparted to him as a solemn bequest—but of late years he had had doubts about the lawfulness of applying this knowledge, believing that herbs could have no efficacy without prayer, and that prayer might suffice without herbs; so that the inherited delight he had in wandering in the fields in search of foxglove and dandelion and coltsfoot, began to wear to him the character of a temptation.
But while people's opinions of him had barely changed, and his daily routines showed almost no visible difference, Marner's inner life had undergone a profound transformation, just as it does for anyone with a passionate nature when they have been forced into solitude. Before arriving in Raveloe, his life had been full of movement, mental activity, and close connections, which, then as now, characterized the life of a tradesman embedded in a tight-knit religious group, where even the poorest member has the opportunity to stand out with their speaking skills and, at the very least, holds the power of a quiet vote in the community's governance. Marner was well-regarded in that small, secluded world known to itself as the church gathering in Lantern Yard; he was thought to be a young man of exemplary behavior and strong faith. A unique interest had built up around him ever since he had experienced a mysterious episode during a prayer meeting, falling into a rigid state and losing consciousness for over an hour, which had been mistaken for death. Seeking a medical explanation for this event would have been viewed by Silas, along with his minister and fellow congregants, as a deliberate avoidance of the spiritual importance it might hold. Silas was clearly considered a brother chosen for special discipline; and while the absence of any spiritual insight during his outward trance made it hard to interpret this discipline, both he and others believed that its results showed in a new clarity and passion. A less honest man might have been tempted to fabricate a vision born from fading memories; a less rational person might have ended up believing in such a fabrication. But Silas was both rational and honest, even though, like many sincere and passionate individuals, he had never found a framework in culture to express his sense of mystery, causing it to spill over into the proper avenues of inquiry and knowledge. He had inherited from his mother some knowledge of medicinal herbs and how to prepare them—an important piece of wisdom she had passed down to him as a precious legacy—but in recent years, he had begun to question the legitimacy of using this knowledge, thinking that herbs would be ineffective without prayer, and that prayer could be enough on its own. As a result, his once beloved pastime of exploring fields for foxglove, dandelions, and coltsfoot started to feel like a temptation.
Among the members of his church there was one young man, a little older than himself, with whom he had long lived in such close friendship that it was the custom of their Lantern Yard brethren to call them David and Jonathan. The real name of the friend was William Dane, and he, too, was regarded as a shining instance of youthful piety, though somewhat given to over-severity towards weaker brethren, and to be so dazzled by his own light as to hold himself wiser than his teachers. But whatever blemishes others might discern in William, to his friend’s mind he was faultless; for Marner had one of those impressible self-doubting natures which, at an inexperienced age, admire imperativeness and lean on contradiction. The expression of trusting simplicity in Marner’s face, heightened by that absence of special observation, that defenceless, deer-like gaze which belongs to large prominent eyes, was strongly contrasted by the self-complacent suppression of inward triumph that lurked in the narrow slanting eyes and compressed lips of William Dane. One of the most frequent topics of conversation between the two friends was Assurance of salvation: Silas confessed that he could never arrive at anything higher than hope mingled with fear, and listened with longing wonder when William declared that he had possessed unshaken assurance ever since, in the period of his conversion, he had dreamed that he saw the words “calling and election sure” standing by themselves on a white page in the open Bible. Such colloquies have occupied many a pair of pale-faced weavers, whose unnurtured souls have been like young winged things, fluttering forsaken in the twilight.
Among the members of his church, there was one young man, a bit older than him, with whom he had long shared a close friendship that led their Lantern Yard brothers to call them David and Jonathan. The friend's real name was William Dane, and he was also seen as a shining example of youthful piety, though he was somewhat harsh towards weaker members and often too blinded by his own brilliance to recognize that he wasn’t wiser than his teachers. But despite any flaws others might see in William, to his friend, he was perfect; Silas had one of those impressionable, self-doubting natures that, at a young age, admired authority and leaned into contradiction. The expression of trusting simplicity on Silas’s face, enhanced by his lack of particular awareness and that defenseless, deer-like gaze from his large, prominent eyes, was sharply contrasted by the self-satisfied smirk of inner triumph that hid behind the narrow, slanted eyes and tight lips of William Dane. One of the most common topics of conversation they shared was the Assurance of salvation: Silas admitted that he could never reach anything beyond a mix of hope and fear, while he listened with longing amazement as William claimed he had felt unshakeable assurance ever since, during his conversion, he had dreamt he saw the words “calling and election sure” printed alone on a white page in an open Bible. Such conversations have filled the quiet hours for many pale-faced weavers, whose souls, un nurtured, are like young, winged creatures fluttering lost in the twilight.
It had seemed to the unsuspecting Silas that the friendship had suffered no chill even from his formation of another attachment of a closer kind. For some months he had been engaged to a young servant-woman, waiting only for a little increase to their mutual savings in order to their marriage; and it was a great delight to him that Sarah did not object to William’s occasional presence in their Sunday interviews. It was at this point in their history that Silas’s cataleptic fit occurred during the prayer-meeting; and amidst the various queries and expressions of interest addressed to him by his fellow-members, William’s suggestion alone jarred with the general sympathy towards a brother thus singled out for special dealings. He observed that, to him, this trance looked more like a visitation of Satan than a proof of divine favour, and exhorted his friend to see that he hid no accursed thing within his soul. Silas, feeling bound to accept rebuke and admonition as a brotherly office, felt no resentment, but only pain, at his friend’s doubts concerning him; and to this was soon added some anxiety at the perception that Sarah’s manner towards him began to exhibit a strange fluctuation between an effort at an increased manifestation of regard and involuntary signs of shrinking and dislike. He asked her if she wished to break off their engagement; but she denied this: their engagement was known to the church, and had been recognized in the prayer-meetings; it could not be broken off without strict investigation, and Sarah could render no reason that would be sanctioned by the feeling of the community. At this time the senior deacon was taken dangerously ill, and, being a childless widower, he was tended night and day by some of the younger brethren or sisters. Silas frequently took his turn in the night-watching with William, the one relieving the other at two in the morning. The old man, contrary to expectation, seemed to be on the way to recovery, when one night Silas, sitting up by his bedside, observed that his usual audible breathing had ceased. The candle was burning low, and he had to lift it to see the patient’s face distinctly. Examination convinced him that the deacon was dead—had been dead some time, for the limbs were rigid. Silas asked himself if he had been asleep, and looked at the clock: it was already four in the morning. How was it that William had not come? In much anxiety he went to seek for help, and soon there were several friends assembled in the house, the minister among them, while Silas went away to his work, wishing he could have met William to know the reason of his non-appearance. But at six o’clock, as he was thinking of going to seek his friend, William came, and with him the minister. They came to summon him to Lantern Yard, to meet the church members there; and to his inquiry concerning the cause of the summons the only reply was, “You will hear.” Nothing further was said until Silas was seated in the vestry, in front of the minister, with the eyes of those who to him represented God’s people fixed solemnly upon him. Then the minister, taking out a pocket-knife, showed it to Silas, and asked him if he knew where he had left that knife? Silas said, he did not know that he had left it anywhere out of his own pocket—but he was trembling at this strange interrogation. He was then exhorted not to hide his sin, but to confess and repent. The knife had been found in the bureau by the departed deacon’s bedside—found in the place where the little bag of church money had lain, which the minister himself had seen the day before. Some hand had removed that bag; and whose hand could it be, if not that of the man to whom the knife belonged? For some time Silas was mute with astonishment: then he said, “God will clear me: I know nothing about the knife being there, or the money being gone. Search me and my dwelling; you will find nothing but three pound five of my own savings, which William Dane knows I have had these six months.” At this William groaned, but the minister said, “The proof is heavy against you, brother Marner. The money was taken in the night last past, and no man was with our departed brother but you, for William Dane declares to us that he was hindered by sudden sickness from going to take his place as usual, and you yourself said that he had not come; and, moreover, you neglected the dead body.”
It seemed to Silas, who was unaware of the tension, that his friendship hadn’t cooled even with his deeper attachment to someone else. For months, he had been engaged to a young servant, just waiting for a little boost in their savings to get married. He was really happy that Sarah didn’t mind William being around during their Sunday meetings. It was at this moment in their lives that Silas had a cataleptic fit during a prayer meeting. Amid the many questions and expressions of concern from his fellow members, only William's comment felt out of place amidst the general sympathy for Silas. He thought that the trance looked more like a sign of Satan than a blessing from God, urging his friend to make sure he wasn’t hiding something cursed inside. Silas felt compelled to accept this rebuke and didn’t hold any resentment, only pain, at his friend’s doubts about him. Soon, he also grew anxious about how Sarah’s attitude toward him began to show a strange back-and-forth between trying to show more affection and showing signs of dislike. He asked her if she wanted to end their engagement, but she said no. Their engagement was known in the church and recognized during prayer meetings; it couldn’t just be broken off without a serious investigation, and Sarah didn’t have a reason that the community would accept. During this time, the senior deacon fell seriously ill. As a childless widower, he was cared for day and night by some of the younger church members. Silas often took his turn to watch over him at night with William, one of them relieving the other around two in the morning. The old man, contrary to expectations, started recovering when one night, while sitting beside his bed, Silas noticed the old man's breathing had stopped. The candle was almost burned out, so he lifted it to see the deacon's face clearly. After examining him, Silas realized the deacon was dead—had been for a while since his limbs were stiff. Silas wondered if he had dozed off and checked the clock: it was already four in the morning. Why hadn’t William come? Worried, he went to find help, and soon several friends were gathered in the house, including the minister, while Silas left for work, wishing he could find William to understand why he hadn’t shown up. When he was about to go look for his friend at six o'clock, William arrived with the minister. They were there to summon him to Lantern Yard to meet the church members. When he asked why, the only answer was, “You will hear.” No more was said until Silas was seated in the vestry, facing the minister, with the eyes of others who represented God’s people fixed solemnly on him. The minister then pulled out a pocket knife, showed it to Silas, and asked if he knew where he had left it. Silas replied he didn’t think he had left it anywhere except in his own pocket—but he was trembling at the odd question. The minister then urged him not to hide his sin but to confess and repent. The knife had been found in the deacon's bureau, next to where the small bag of church money had been kept, which the minister had seen just the day before. Someone had taken that bag; whose hand could it be if not the owner of the knife? Silas was speechless with shock for a moment before saying, “God will exonerate me; I know nothing about the knife being there or the money being missing. Search me and my home; you’ll find nothing but three pounds and five shillings of my own savings, which William Dane knows I've had for six months.” At that, William groaned, but the minister said, “The evidence is heavy against you, brother Marner. The money was taken last night, and no one was with our departed brother but you, since William Dane claims he was suddenly sick and couldn’t take his usual place, and you yourself said he hadn’t come; besides, you neglected the dead body.”
“I must have slept,” said Silas. Then, after a pause, he added, “Or I must have had another visitation like that which you have all seen me under, so that the thief must have come and gone while I was not in the body, but out of the body. But, I say again, search me and my dwelling, for I have been nowhere else.”
“I must have dozed off,” said Silas. Then, after a moment, he added, “Or I must have had another experience like the one you’ve all seen me go through, so the thief might have come and gone while I was not aware, but out of it. But I’ll say it again, search me and my place, because I haven’t been anywhere else.”
The search was made, and it ended—in William Dane’s finding the well-known bag, empty, tucked behind the chest of drawers in Silas’s chamber! On this William exhorted his friend to confess, and not to hide his sin any longer. Silas turned a look of keen reproach on him, and said, “William, for nine years that we have gone in and out together, have you ever known me tell a lie? But God will clear me.”
The search was conducted, and it concluded with William Dane discovering the familiar bag, empty, hidden behind the dresser in Silas's room! With this, William urged his friend to confess and stop hiding his wrongdoing. Silas looked at him with sharp reproach and said, “William, in the nine years we've been friends, have you ever known me to lie? But God will vindicate me.”
“Brother,” said William, “how do I know what you may have done in the secret chambers of your heart, to give Satan an advantage over you?”
“Brother,” said William, “how do I know what you might have done in the hidden corners of your heart that could give Satan the upper hand over you?”
Silas was still looking at his friend. Suddenly a deep flush came over his face, and he was about to speak impetuously, when he seemed checked again by some inward shock, that sent the flush back and made him tremble. But at last he spoke feebly, looking at William.
Silas was still looking at his friend. Suddenly, a deep flush spread across his face, and he was about to speak impulsively when he seemed to be halted again by some internal jolt that pushed the flush away and made him shake. But finally, he spoke weakly, looking at William.
“I remember now—the knife wasn’t in my pocket.”
“I remember now—the knife wasn’t in my pocket.”
William said, “I know nothing of what you mean.” The other persons present, however, began to inquire where Silas meant to say that the knife was, but he would give no further explanation: he only said, “I am sore stricken; I can say nothing. God will clear me.”
William said, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” However, the others started asking where Silas was saying the knife was, but he wouldn’t explain any further: he just said, “I’m really hurt; I can’t say anything. God will prove my innocence.”
On their return to the vestry there was further deliberation. Any resort to legal measures for ascertaining the culprit was contrary to the principles of the church in Lantern Yard, according to which prosecution was forbidden to Christians, even had the case held less scandal to the community. But the members were bound to take other measures for finding out the truth, and they resolved on praying and drawing lots. This resolution can be a ground of surprise only to those who are unacquainted with that obscure religious life which has gone on in the alleys of our towns. Silas knelt with his brethren, relying on his own innocence being certified by immediate divine interference, but feeling that there was sorrow and mourning behind for him even then—that his trust in man had been cruelly bruised. The lots declared that Silas Marner was guilty. He was solemnly suspended from church-membership, and called upon to render up the stolen money: only on confession, as the sign of repentance, could he be received once more within the folds of the church. Marner listened in silence. At last, when everyone rose to depart, he went towards William Dane and said, in a voice shaken by agitation—
On their way back to the vestry, they discussed things further. Taking legal action to identify the culprit was against the principles of the church in Lantern Yard, which forbade Christians from pursuing prosecution, even if the situation wasn’t particularly scandalous for the community. However, the members felt they had to take other steps to uncover the truth, and they decided to pray and draw lots. This decision might surprise those unfamiliar with the hidden religious lives that have existed in the backstreets of our towns. Silas knelt with his companions, hoping his innocence would be proven through immediate divine intervention, while also feeling the sorrow and grief lingering behind—his faith in people had been deeply wounded. The lots declared that Silas Marner was guilty. He was officially suspended from church membership and told to return the stolen money; only through confession, as a sign of repentance, could he be welcomed back into the church community. Marner listened in silence. Finally, when everyone stood to leave, he approached William Dane and said, his voice trembling with emotion—
“The last time I remember using my knife, was when I took it out to cut a strap for you. I don’t remember putting it in my pocket again. You stole the money, and you have woven a plot to lay the sin at my door. But you may prosper, for all that: there is no just God that governs the earth righteously, but a God of lies, that bears witness against the innocent.”
“The last time I remember using my knife was when I took it out to cut a strap for you. I don’t remember putting it back in my pocket. You stole the money, and you’ve cooked up a scheme to blame me for it. But you might thrive despite that: there’s no just God that rules the earth fairly, only a God of lies who testifies against the innocent.”
There was a general shudder at this blasphemy.
There was an overall shudder at this disrespect.
William said meekly, “I leave our brethren to judge whether this is the voice of Satan or not. I can do nothing but pray for you, Silas.”
William said quietly, “I’ll let our brothers decide if this is the voice of Satan or not. All I can do is pray for you, Silas.”
Poor Marner went out with that despair in his soul—that shaken trust in God and man, which is little short of madness to a loving nature. In the bitterness of his wounded spirit, he said to himself, “She will cast me off too.” And he reflected that, if she did not believe the testimony against him, her whole faith must be upset as his was. To people accustomed to reason about the forms in which their religious feeling has incorporated itself, it is difficult to enter into that simple, untaught state of mind in which the form and the feeling have never been severed by an act of reflection. We are apt to think it inevitable that a man in Marner’s position should have begun to question the validity of an appeal to the divine judgment by drawing lots; but to him this would have been an effort of independent thought such as he had never known; and he must have made the effort at a moment when all his energies were turned into the anguish of disappointed faith. If there is an angel who records the sorrows of men as well as their sins, he knows how many and deep are the sorrows that spring from false ideas for which no man is culpable.
Poor Marner went out with despair in his soul—a shattered trust in God and people, which feels almost like madness to someone who loves deeply. In the bitterness of his wounded spirit, he thought to himself, “She will cast me off too.” He realized that if she didn’t believe the accusations against him, her entire faith would be shaken just like his was. For those used to analyzing how their religious feelings take shape, it’s hard to understand that simple, untrained mindset where the form and the feeling have never been separated by any reflection. We tend to assume it’s natural for someone in Marner’s situation to start questioning the validity of appealing to divine judgment through drawing lots; but for him, that would have been an effort of independent thought he had never experienced, and he would have had to make that effort when all his energy was consumed by the pain of his crushed faith. If there’s an angel who records both the sorrows and the sins of humanity, he knows how many and how profound the sorrows are that come from false ideas for which no one is to blame.
Marner went home, and for a whole day sat alone, stunned by despair, without any impulse to go to Sarah and attempt to win her belief in his innocence. The second day he took refuge from benumbing unbelief, by getting into his loom and working away as usual; and before many hours were past, the minister and one of the deacons came to him with the message from Sarah, that she held her engagement to him at an end. Silas received the message mutely, and then turned away from the messengers to work at his loom again. In little more than a month from that time, Sarah was married to William Dane; and not long afterwards it was known to the brethren in Lantern Yard that Silas Marner had departed from the town.
Marner went home and spent an entire day alone, stunned by despair, with no desire to go to Sarah and try to convince her of his innocence. On the second day, he escaped the numbing disbelief by getting back to his loom and working as usual; before long, the minister and one of the deacons visited him with the message from Sarah that she considered their engagement over. Silas received the news in silence and then turned back to his loom. In just over a month, Sarah married William Dane, and not long after, the members of Lantern Yard learned that Silas Marner had left town.
CHAPTER II.
Even people whose lives have been made various by learning, sometimes find it hard to keep a fast hold on their habitual views of life, on their faith in the Invisible, nay, on the sense that their past joys and sorrows are a real experience, when they are suddenly transported to a new land, where the beings around them know nothing of their history, and share none of their ideas—where their mother earth shows another lap, and human life has other forms than those on which their souls have been nourished. Minds that have been unhinged from their old faith and love, have perhaps sought this Lethean influence of exile, in which the past becomes dreamy because its symbols have all vanished, and the present too is dreamy because it is linked with no memories. But even their experience may hardly enable them thoroughly to imagine what was the effect on a simple weaver like Silas Marner, when he left his own country and people and came to settle in Raveloe. Nothing could be more unlike his native town, set within sight of the widespread hillsides, than this low, wooded region, where he felt hidden even from the heavens by the screening trees and hedgerows. There was nothing here, when he rose in the deep morning quiet and looked out on the dewy brambles and rank tufted grass, that seemed to have any relation with that life centring in Lantern Yard, which had once been to him the altar-place of high dispensations. The whitewashed walls; the little pews where well-known figures entered with a subdued rustling, and where first one well-known voice and then another, pitched in a peculiar key of petition, uttered phrases at once occult and familiar, like the amulet worn on the heart; the pulpit where the minister delivered unquestioned doctrine, and swayed to and fro, and handled the book in a long accustomed manner; the very pauses between the couplets of the hymn, as it was given out, and the recurrent swell of voices in song: these things had been the channel of divine influences to Marner—they were the fostering home of his religious emotions—they were Christianity and God’s kingdom upon earth. A weaver who finds hard words in his hymn-book knows nothing of abstractions; as the little child knows nothing of parental love, but only knows one face and one lap towards which it stretches its arms for refuge and nurture.
Even people whose lives have been enriched by learning sometimes struggle to hold onto their habitual views of life, their faith in the unseen, and the feeling that their past joys and sorrows are real experiences when they are suddenly taken to a new place, where the people around them know nothing of their history and share none of their ideas—where the earth feels different, and human life takes on forms that are unlike those that nurtured their souls. Minds that have been disconnected from their old beliefs and loves may have sought this forgetfulness of exile, where the past becomes hazy because its symbols have disappeared, and the present feels dreamlike because it holds no memories. But even their experience may not fully capture what it was like for a simple weaver like Silas Marner when he left his own country and settled in Raveloe. Nothing could be more different from his hometown, visible against the surrounding hills, than this low, wooded area, where he felt hidden even from the heavens by the trees and hedgerows. There was nothing here, when he rose in the deep morning quiet and looked at the dewy brambles and thick, tufted grass, that seemed connected to the life centered in Lantern Yard, which had once been to him the sacred place of significant happenings. The whitewashed walls; the little pews where familiar faces entered with quiet rustling, and where one familiar voice after another, pitched in a distinctive tone of prayer, spoke phrases that were both mysterious and familiar, like an amulet worn over the heart; the pulpit where the minister delivered unquestioned teachings and swayed back and forth, handling the book in a long-familiar way; even the pauses between the verses of the hymn as it was sung, and the rising swell of voices in song: these had been the channels of divine influence for Marner—they were the nurturing home of his religious feelings—they represented Christianity and God’s kingdom on earth. A weaver who struggles with difficult words in his hymn book knows nothing of abstract concepts; just as a young child knows nothing of parental love, but only knows one face and one lap to which it reaches out for comfort and care.
And what could be more unlike that Lantern Yard world than the world in Raveloe?—orchards looking lazy with neglected plenty; the large church in the wide churchyard, which men gazed at lounging at their own doors in service-time; the purple-faced farmers jogging along the lanes or turning in at the Rainbow; homesteads, where men supped heavily and slept in the light of the evening hearth, and where women seemed to be laying up a stock of linen for the life to come. There were no lips in Raveloe from which a word could fall that would stir Silas Marner’s benumbed faith to a sense of pain. In the early ages of the world, we know, it was believed that each territory was inhabited and ruled by its own divinities, so that a man could cross the bordering heights and be out of the reach of his native gods, whose presence was confined to the streams and the groves and the hills among which he had lived from his birth. And poor Silas was vaguely conscious of something not unlike the feeling of primitive men, when they fled thus, in fear or in sullenness, from the face of an unpropitious deity. It seemed to him that the Power he had vainly trusted in among the streets and at the prayer-meetings, was very far away from this land in which he had taken refuge, where men lived in careless abundance, knowing and needing nothing of that trust, which, for him, had been turned to bitterness. The little light he possessed spread its beams so narrowly, that frustrated belief was a curtain broad enough to create for him the blackness of night.
And what could be more different from that Lantern Yard world than the world in Raveloe?—orchards that looked laid-back with unharvested plenty; the big church in the spacious churchyard, where men would gaze while hanging out at their own doors during service; farmers with purple faces casually making their way along the lanes or stopping by the Rainbow; homes where men had hearty dinners and slept by the glowing evening fire, and where women seemed to be stockpiling linens for the afterlife. There were no voices in Raveloe that could say anything to awaken Silas Marner’s numbed faith enough to feel pain. In the early days of the world, people believed each land had its own gods, so a person could cross the borders and escape their native deities, whose presence was limited to the streams, groves, and hills where they had lived their whole lives. Poor Silas vaguely felt something similar to the primitive men who fled from the sight of an unkind god, whether in fear or moodiness. He sensed that the Power he had desperately relied on among the streets and in prayer meetings was very distant from this place where he had sought refuge, where people lived in easy abundance, unaware of and uninterested in the trust that had turned to bitterness for him. The little light he had shone so narrowly that his frustrated beliefs created a darkness thick enough to feel like night.
His first movement after the shock had been to work in his loom; and he went on with this unremittingly, never asking himself why, now he was come to Raveloe, he worked far on into the night to finish the tale of Mrs. Osgood’s table-linen sooner than she expected—without contemplating beforehand the money she would put into his hand for the work. He seemed to weave, like the spider, from pure impulse, without reflection. Every man’s work, pursued steadily, tends in this way to become an end in itself, and so to bridge over the loveless chasms of his life. Silas’s hand satisfied itself with throwing the shuttle, and his eye with seeing the little squares in the cloth complete themselves under his effort. Then there were the calls of hunger; and Silas, in his solitude, had to provide his own breakfast, dinner, and supper, to fetch his own water from the well, and put his own kettle on the fire; and all these immediate promptings helped, along with the weaving, to reduce his life to the unquestioning activity of a spinning insect. He hated the thought of the past; there was nothing that called out his love and fellowship toward the strangers he had come amongst; and the future was all dark, for there was no Unseen Love that cared for him. Thought was arrested by utter bewilderment, now its old narrow pathway was closed, and affection seemed to have died under the bruise that had fallen on its keenest nerves.
His first instinct after the shock was to work at his loom, and he continued doing so tirelessly, never questioning why he worked late into the night to finish Mrs. Osgood’s table-linen ahead of her expectations—without considering the payment she would give him for it. It felt like he wove from pure impulse, like a spider, without thinking. When a man works steadily, his work often becomes an end in itself, helping him to fill the empty spaces in his life. Silas found satisfaction in throwing the shuttle and watching the little squares in the fabric come together through his effort. Then there were the basic needs; Silas, alone, had to make his own breakfast, lunch, and dinner, draw his own water from the well, and set his own kettle on the fire; all these immediate demands, along with the weaving, reduced his life to the mindless activity of a spinning insect. He loathed the thought of the past; nothing stirred any love or connection in him toward the strangers around him, and the future felt bleak, as there was no unseen love that cared for him. His thoughts were halted by sheer confusion, as his old familiar paths were gone, and affection seemed to have died under the weight of the pain that had struck the most sensitive parts of him.
But at last Mrs. Osgood’s table-linen was finished, and Silas was paid in gold. His earnings in his native town, where he worked for a wholesale dealer, had been after a lower rate; he had been paid weekly, and of his weekly earnings a large proportion had gone to objects of piety and charity. Now, for the first time in his life, he had five bright guineas put into his hand; no man expected a share of them, and he loved no man that he should offer him a share. But what were the guineas to him who saw no vista beyond countless days of weaving? It was needless for him to ask that, for it was pleasant to him to feel them in his palm, and look at their bright faces, which were all his own: it was another element of life, like the weaving and the satisfaction of hunger, subsisting quite aloof from the life of belief and love from which he had been cut off. The weaver’s hand had known the touch of hard-won money even before the palm had grown to its full breadth; for twenty years, mysterious money had stood to him as the symbol of earthly good, and the immediate object of toil. He had seemed to love it little in the years when every penny had its purpose for him; for he loved the purpose then. But now, when all purpose was gone, that habit of looking towards the money and grasping it with a sense of fulfilled effort made a loam that was deep enough for the seeds of desire; and as Silas walked homeward across the fields in the twilight, he drew out the money and thought it was brighter in the gathering gloom.
But finally, Mrs. Osgood’s tablecloths were finished, and Silas was paid in gold. Back in his hometown, where he worked for a wholesale dealer, he earned a lower wage; he was paid weekly, and a large part of his earnings went to charity and religious causes. Now, for the first time in his life, he had five shiny guineas in his hand; no one expected a share of them, and he didn’t care for anyone enough to offer them a share. But what were the guineas worth to him when he saw no future beyond countless days of weaving? He didn’t need to ask since it felt good to hold them in his palm and look at their bright faces, which were all his: it was another part of life, like weaving and the satisfaction of hunger, completely separate from the life of faith and love he had been cut off from. The weaver's hand had felt the touch of hard-earned money even before his palm was fully developed; for twenty years, money had represented earthly good and the direct result of his labor. He had seemed to value it little during the years when every penny had a purpose for him; he cared about the purpose back then. But now, when all purpose was gone, that habit of looking toward the money and holding it with a feeling of accomplished effort created a foundation deep enough for the seeds of desire; and as Silas walked home across the fields in the twilight, he took out the money and thought it looked brighter in the fading light.
About this time an incident happened which seemed to open a possibility of some fellowship with his neighbours. One day, taking a pair of shoes to be mended, he saw the cobbler’s wife seated by the fire, suffering from the terrible symptoms of heart-disease and dropsy, which he had witnessed as the precursors of his mother’s death. He felt a rush of pity at the mingled sight and remembrance, and, recalling the relief his mother had found from a simple preparation of foxglove, he promised Sally Oates to bring her something that would ease her, since the doctor did her no good. In this office of charity, Silas felt, for the first time since he had come to Raveloe, a sense of unity between his past and present life, which might have been the beginning of his rescue from the insect-like existence into which his nature had shrunk. But Sally Oates’s disease had raised her into a personage of much interest and importance among the neighbours, and the fact of her having found relief from drinking Silas Marner’s “stuff” became a matter of general discourse. When Doctor Kimble gave physic, it was natural that it should have an effect; but when a weaver, who came from nobody knew where, worked wonders with a bottle of brown waters, the occult character of the process was evident. Such a sort of thing had not been known since the Wise Woman at Tarley died; and she had charms as well as “stuff”: everybody went to her when their children had fits. Silas Marner must be a person of the same sort, for how did he know what would bring back Sally Oates’s breath, if he didn’t know a fine sight more than that? The Wise Woman had words that she muttered to herself, so that you couldn’t hear what they were, and if she tied a bit of red thread round the child’s toe the while, it would keep off the water in the head. There were women in Raveloe, at that present time, who had worn one of the Wise Woman’s little bags round their necks, and, in consequence, had never had an idiot child, as Ann Coulter had. Silas Marner could very likely do as much, and more; and now it was all clear how he should have come from unknown parts, and be so “comical-looking”. But Sally Oates must mind and not tell the doctor, for he would be sure to set his face against Marner: he was always angry about the Wise Woman, and used to threaten those who went to her that they should have none of his help any more.
Around this time, something happened that seemed to create an opportunity for him to connect with his neighbors. One day, while taking a pair of shoes to be repaired, he saw the cobbler’s wife sitting by the fire, suffering from the severe symptoms of heart disease and dropsy, which he had seen as signs before his mother died. He felt a rush of compassion at the combined sight and memory, and remembering the relief his mother found from a simple foxglove concoction, he promised Sally Oates he would bring her something that would help since the doctor wasn’t doing her any good. In this act of kindness, Silas felt, for the first time since arriving in Raveloe, a sense of connection between his past and present life, which could have marked the start of his rescue from the insect-like existence he had fallen into. But Sally Oates’s illness had elevated her into a person of significant interest among the neighbors, and the fact that she found relief from drinking Silas Marner’s “stuff” became a hot topic of conversation. When Doctor Kimble prescribed medicine, it was expected to have an effect; but when a weaver, who came from who-knows-where, worked wonders with a bottle of brown liquid, the mysterious nature of the process was clear. This kind of thing hadn’t been seen since the Wise Woman at Tarley passed away; she had charms as well as “stuff”: everyone went to her when their children had seizures. Silas Marner must be a person like that, since how else would he know what would restore Sally Oates’s breath, if he didn’t know much more than that? The Wise Woman had words she muttered to herself so softly you couldn't catch them, and if she tied a bit of red thread around the child’s toe while doing so, it would keep off the water in the head. There were women in Raveloe at that time who had worn one of the Wise Woman’s little bags around their necks and, as a result, had never had an idiot child, like Ann Coulter. Silas Marner could very likely do as much, if not more; and now it was all clear why he had come from unknown places and looked so “strange.” But Sally Oates had to be careful not to tell the doctor, because he would surely disapprove of Marner: he was always angry about the Wise Woman and used to threaten those who went to her that they would receive none of his help anymore.
Silas now found himself and his cottage suddenly beset by mothers who wanted him to charm away the whooping-cough, or bring back the milk, and by men who wanted stuff against the rheumatics or the knots in the hands; and, to secure themselves against a refusal, the applicants brought silver in their palms. Silas might have driven a profitable trade in charms as well as in his small list of drugs; but money on this condition was no temptation to him: he had never known an impulse towards falsity, and he drove one after another away with growing irritation, for the news of him as a wise man had spread even to Tarley, and it was long before people ceased to take long walks for the sake of asking his aid. But the hope in his wisdom was at length changed into dread, for no one believed him when he said he knew no charms and could work no cures, and every man and woman who had an accident or a new attack after applying to him, set the misfortune down to Master Marner’s ill-will and irritated glances. Thus it came to pass that his movement of pity towards Sally Oates, which had given him a transient sense of brotherhood, heightened the repulsion between him and his neighbours, and made his isolation more complete.
Silas now found himself and his cottage suddenly surrounded by mothers who wanted him to fix their kids' whooping cough, or bring back their milk, and by men looking for remedies for rheumatism or hand cramps; to make sure they wouldn't be turned away, the visitors showed up with silver in their hands. Silas could have made a decent living selling charms along with his small selection of medicines, but money under these circumstances didn’t tempt him: he had never felt the urge to be dishonest, and he sent each person away with growing annoyance. News of him being a wise man had spread even to Tarley, and it took a long time for people to stop making long trips just to ask for his help. But eventually, the hope in his wisdom turned into fear, because no one believed him when he said he didn't know any charms or have any cures. Every man and woman who experienced an accident or new illness after seeing him blamed their misfortune on Master Marner's bad intentions and scowls. This led to a situation where his moment of compassion toward Sally Oates, which had given him a fleeting sense of connection, only deepened the divide between him and his neighbors and made his isolation feel even more complete.
Gradually the guineas, the crowns, and the half-crowns grew to a heap, and Marner drew less and less for his own wants, trying to solve the problem of keeping himself strong enough to work sixteen hours a-day on as small an outlay as possible. Have not men, shut up in solitary imprisonment, found an interest in marking the moments by straight strokes of a certain length on the wall, until the growth of the sum of straight strokes, arranged in triangles, has become a mastering purpose? Do we not wile away moments of inanity or fatigued waiting by repeating some trivial movement or sound, until the repetition has bred a want, which is incipient habit? That will help us to understand how the love of accumulating money grows an absorbing passion in men whose imaginations, even in the very beginning of their hoard, showed them no purpose beyond it. Marner wanted the heaps of ten to grow into a square, and then into a larger square; and every added guinea, while it was itself a satisfaction, bred a new desire. In this strange world, made a hopeless riddle to him, he might, if he had had a less intense nature, have sat weaving, weaving—looking towards the end of his pattern, or towards the end of his web, till he forgot the riddle, and everything else but his immediate sensations; but the money had come to mark off his weaving into periods, and the money not only grew, but it remained with him. He began to think it was conscious of him, as his loom was, and he would on no account have exchanged those coins, which had become his familiars, for other coins with unknown faces. He handled them, he counted them, till their form and colour were like the satisfaction of a thirst to him; but it was only in the night, when his work was done, that he drew them out to enjoy their companionship. He had taken up some bricks in his floor underneath his loom, and here he had made a hole in which he set the iron pot that contained his guineas and silver coins, covering the bricks with sand whenever he replaced them. Not that the idea of being robbed presented itself often or strongly to his mind: hoarding was common in country districts in those days; there were old labourers in the parish of Raveloe who were known to have their savings by them, probably inside their flock-beds; but their rustic neighbours, though not all of them as honest as their ancestors in the days of King Alfred, had not imaginations bold enough to lay a plan of burglary. How could they have spent the money in their own village without betraying themselves? They would be obliged to “run away”—a course as dark and dubious as a balloon journey.
Slowly, the guineas, crowns, and half-crowns piled up, and Marner took less and less for his own needs, trying to figure out how to stay strong enough to work sixteen hours a day while spending as little as possible. Haven't people, locked away in solitary confinement, found interest in tallying the hours by making straight lines of a certain length on the wall, turning the total of those lines, arranged in triangles, into a main focus? Don’t we pass the time during dull or tiresome waiting by repeating some small action or sound, until the repetition creates a need that turns into a habit? This helps us understand how the desire to accumulate money becomes a consuming passion in men whose imaginations, even at the start of their savings, see no purpose beyond it. Marner wanted his piles of ten to turn into a square, and then into a larger square; and every new guinea, while satisfying in itself, sparked a new craving. In this strange world that felt like an impossible puzzle to him, he might, if he had a less intense personality, have sat weaving—looking toward the end of his pattern, or the end of his web—until he forgot the puzzle and everything else except his immediate feelings; but the money became a way to break up his weaving into segments, and the money not only increased, but it also stayed with him. He started to think it was aware of him, like his loom was, and he wouldn’t have traded those coins, which had become familiar to him, for any others with unknown faces. He handled them, counted them, until their shape and color felt as satisfying as quenching a thirst; but it was only at night, when his work was finished, that he took them out to enjoy their company. He had lifted some bricks from his floor under the loom, and here he had made a hole to place the iron pot that held his guineas and silver coins, covering the bricks with sand whenever he put them back. Not that he frequently or strongly worried about being robbed: hoarding was common in rural areas back then; there were old laborers in the parish of Raveloe known to have their savings hidden away, probably tucked inside their flock beds; yet their country neighbors, though not all as honest as their forebears from the days of King Alfred, lacked the imagination to plan a burglary. How could they have spent the money in their own village without giving themselves away? They would have to “run away”—a plan as uncertain and risky as a balloon trip.
So, year after year, Silas Marner had lived in this solitude, his guineas rising in the iron pot, and his life narrowing and hardening itself more and more into a mere pulsation of desire and satisfaction that had no relation to any other being. His life had reduced itself to the functions of weaving and hoarding, without any contemplation of an end towards which the functions tended. The same sort of process has perhaps been undergone by wiser men, when they have been cut off from faith and love—only, instead of a loom and a heap of guineas, they have had some erudite research, some ingenious project, or some well-knit theory. Strangely Marner’s face and figure shrank and bent themselves into a constant mechanical relation to the objects of his life, so that he produced the same sort of impression as a handle or a crooked tube, which has no meaning standing apart. The prominent eyes that used to look trusting and dreamy, now looked as if they had been made to see only one kind of thing that was very small, like tiny grain, for which they hunted everywhere: and he was so withered and yellow, that, though he was not yet forty, the children always called him “Old Master Marner”.
So, year after year, Silas Marner had lived in this solitude, his guineas accumulating in the iron pot, and his life becoming more and more narrow and rigid, focused only on a simple cycle of desire and satisfaction that had nothing to do with anyone else. His existence had boiled down to just weaving and hoarding, with no thought of any larger purpose for these activities. Perhaps even wiser men have gone through a similar process when cut off from faith and love—only, instead of using a loom and collecting guineas, they might have engaged in some scholarly research, clever project, or well-structured theory. Strangely, Marner’s face and body shrank and contorted into a mechanical connection to the objects of his life, giving off the same kind of impression as a handle or a crooked tube, which has no meaning when standing alone. The once trusting and dreamy look in his prominent eyes now appeared as if they had been made to focus solely on one very tiny thing, like tiny grains, for which he searched everywhere; and he was so withered and yellow that, even though he wasn’t yet forty, the children always called him “Old Master Marner.”
Yet even in this stage of withering a little incident happened, which showed that the sap of affection was not all gone. It was one of his daily tasks to fetch his water from a well a couple of fields off, and for this purpose, ever since he came to Raveloe, he had had a brown earthenware pot, which he held as his most precious utensil among the very few conveniences he had granted himself. It had been his companion for twelve years, always standing on the same spot, always lending its handle to him in the early morning, so that its form had an expression for him of willing helpfulness, and the impress of its handle on his palm gave a satisfaction mingled with that of having the fresh clear water. One day as he was returning from the well, he stumbled against the step of the stile, and his brown pot, falling with force against the stones that overarched the ditch below him, was broken in three pieces. Silas picked up the pieces and carried them home with grief in his heart. The brown pot could never be of use to him any more, but he stuck the bits together and propped the ruin in its old place for a memorial.
Yet even at this point of decline, a small incident occurred that showed the warmth of affection wasn't entirely gone. One of his daily chores was to fetch water from a well a short distance away, and for this, he had owned a brown earthenware pot ever since he arrived in Raveloe. He considered it his most cherished possession among the few comforts he allowed himself. It had been his companion for twelve years, always in the same spot, always ready to help him in the early morning. To him, its shape symbolized a willing gesture of support, and the feel of its handle in his hand brought a sense of satisfaction combined with the pleasure of fresh, clear water. One day, while on his way back from the well, he tripped over the step of the stile, and his brown pot fell hard against the stones that lined the ditch below, shattering into three pieces. Silas picked up the fragments and brought them home, feeling a deep sadness in his heart. The brown pot would never serve him again, but he carefully glued the pieces together and placed the broken relic back in its usual spot as a memento.
This is the history of Silas Marner, until the fifteenth year after he came to Raveloe. The livelong day he sat in his loom, his ear filled with its monotony, his eyes bent close down on the slow growth of sameness in the brownish web, his muscles moving with such even repetition that their pause seemed almost as much a constraint as the holding of his breath. But at night came his revelry: at night he closed his shutters, and made fast his doors, and drew forth his gold. Long ago the heap of coins had become too large for the iron pot to hold them, and he had made for them two thick leather bags, which wasted no room in their resting-place, but lent themselves flexibly to every corner. How the guineas shone as they came pouring out of the dark leather mouths! The silver bore no large proportion in amount to the gold, because the long pieces of linen which formed his chief work were always partly paid for in gold, and out of the silver he supplied his own bodily wants, choosing always the shillings and sixpences to spend in this way. He loved the guineas best, but he would not change the silver—the crowns and half-crowns that were his own earnings, begotten by his labour; he loved them all. He spread them out in heaps and bathed his hands in them; then he counted them and set them up in regular piles, and felt their rounded outline between his thumb and fingers, and thought fondly of the guineas that were only half-earned by the work in his loom, as if they had been unborn children—thought of the guineas that were coming slowly through the coming years, through all his life, which spread far away before him, the end quite hidden by countless days of weaving. No wonder his thoughts were still with his loom and his money when he made his journeys through the fields and the lanes to fetch and carry home his work, so that his steps never wandered to the hedge-banks and the lane-side in search of the once familiar herbs: these too belonged to the past, from which his life had shrunk away, like a rivulet that has sunk far down from the grassy fringe of its old breadth into a little shivering thread, that cuts a groove for itself in the barren sand.
This is the story of Silas Marner, up until the fifteenth year after he arrived in Raveloe. All day he sat at his loom, listening to its dull sound, his eyes focused on the slow, repetitive pattern of the brownish fabric, his muscles working with such consistent motion that even stopping felt like a restraint, as if he were holding his breath. But at night, he celebrated: he shut his windows, locked his doors, and took out his gold. Long ago, the pile of coins had grown too large for the iron pot to hold, so he made two thick leather bags for them that fit snugly in their space without taking up much room. How the guineas sparkled as they spilled out of the dark leather bags! The silver didn't amount to much compared to the gold, since the long pieces of linen that made up his main work were mostly paid for with gold, while he used the silver for his personal needs, always choosing shillings and sixpences for spending. He loved the guineas the most, but he wouldn't trade the silver—the crowns and half-crowns that were the fruits of his labor; he cherished them all. He spread them out in piles and let his hands roam through them; then he counted them and arranged them into neat stacks, feeling their smooth shape between his thumb and fingers, dreaming of the guineas that were only half-earned from his loom, as if they were unborn children—thinking of the guineas that would slowly come to him through the years ahead, through all his life, which stretched far into the distance, with the end hidden by countless days of weaving. It's no surprise that his thoughts remained on his loom and his money when he walked through the fields and lanes to pick up his work, so his steps never strayed to the hedgerows and the edges of the lane in search of the once-familiar herbs: those too belonged to the past, from which his life had withdrawn, like a stream that had sunk down from the grassy border of its former width into a narrow, shivering thread, carving a path for itself in the dry sand.
But about the Christmas of that fifteenth year, a second great change came over Marner’s life, and his history became blent in a singular manner with the life of his neighbours.
But around Christmas of that fifteenth year, a second significant change occurred in Marner’s life, and his story became uniquely intertwined with the lives of his neighbors.
CHAPTER III.
The greatest man in Raveloe was Squire Cass, who lived in the large red house with the handsome flight of stone steps in front and the high stables behind it, nearly opposite the church. He was only one among several landed parishioners, but he alone was honoured with the title of Squire; for though Mr. Osgood’s family was also understood to be of timeless origin—the Raveloe imagination having never ventured back to that fearful blank when there were no Osgoods—still, he merely owned the farm he occupied; whereas Squire Cass had a tenant or two, who complained of the game to him quite as if he had been a lord.
The most notable person in Raveloe was Squire Cass, who lived in the big red house with its impressive stone steps out front and tall stables in the back, almost directly across from the church. He was just one of several landowning parishioners, but he was the only one given the title of Squire; even though Mr. Osgood's family was also believed to have a long history—since the people of Raveloe didn't think back to that scary time when there were no Osgoods—he just owned the farm he lived on; meanwhile, Squire Cass had a couple of tenants who complained to him about the game as if he were a lord.
It was still that glorious war-time which was felt to be a peculiar favour of Providence towards the landed interest, and the fall of prices had not yet come to carry the race of small squires and yeomen down that road to ruin for which extravagant habits and bad husbandry were plentifully anointing their wheels. I am speaking now in relation to Raveloe and the parishes that resembled it; for our old-fashioned country life had many different aspects, as all life must have when it is spread over a various surface, and breathed on variously by multitudinous currents, from the winds of heaven to the thoughts of men, which are for ever moving and crossing each other with incalculable results. Raveloe lay low among the bushy trees and the rutted lanes, aloof from the currents of industrial energy and Puritan earnestness: the rich ate and drank freely, accepting gout and apoplexy as things that ran mysteriously in respectable families, and the poor thought that the rich were entirely in the right of it to lead a jolly life; besides, their feasting caused a multiplication of orts, which were the heirlooms of the poor. Betty Jay scented the boiling of Squire Cass’s hams, but her longing was arrested by the unctuous liquor in which they were boiled; and when the seasons brought round the great merry-makings, they were regarded on all hands as a fine thing for the poor. For the Raveloe feasts were like the rounds of beef and the barrels of ale—they were on a large scale, and lasted a good while, especially in the winter-time. After ladies had packed up their best gowns and top-knots in bandboxes, and had incurred the risk of fording streams on pillions with the precious burden in rainy or snowy weather, when there was no knowing how high the water would rise, it was not to be supposed that they looked forward to a brief pleasure. On this ground it was always contrived in the dark seasons, when there was little work to be done, and the hours were long, that several neighbours should keep open house in succession. So soon as Squire Cass’s standing dishes diminished in plenty and freshness, his guests had nothing to do but to walk a little higher up the village to Mr. Osgood’s, at the Orchards, and they found hams and chines uncut, pork-pies with the scent of the fire in them, spun butter in all its freshness—everything, in fact, that appetites at leisure could desire, in perhaps greater perfection, though not in greater abundance, than at Squire Cass’s.
It was still that glorious wartime, seen as a unique blessing from Providence towards landowners, and prices hadn't dropped yet to push the small landowners and farmers down that path to ruin, a path already slickened by lavish lifestyles and poor farming. I'm referring now to Raveloe and its similar parishes; our traditional country life had many different sides, as any life does when it spreads over diverse landscapes and is influenced by a multitude of forces, from the winds of nature to human thoughts, which are always moving and intersecting with unpredictable outcomes. Raveloe settled low among the bushy trees and bumpy lanes, separate from the waves of industrial growth and strict Puritan ethics: the wealthy indulged freely, accepting gout and strokes as some mysterious inheritance of respectable families, while the poor believed the rich were completely justified in enjoying a carefree life; besides, their feasts created leftovers, which the poor considered their share. Betty Jay caught the scent of Squire Cass’s hams cooking, but her craving was interrupted by the rich broth they were simmered in; and when the seasons brought the big celebrations, they were widely seen as a great opportunity for the poor. The feasts in Raveloe were like large servings of roast beef and barrels of ale—they were extensive and lasted quite a while, especially in winter. After the ladies had packed their best dresses and hairstyles into boxes and had faced the risk of crossing streams on pillions with their precious cargo in rainy or snowy weather, not knowing how high the water might rise, it was clear they didn’t look forward to a short-lived enjoyment. For this reason, during the darker months, when there was little work to do and the days felt long, several neighbors took turns hosting open houses. As soon as Squire Cass’s usual fare began to run low, his guests simply walked a bit further up the village to Mr. Osgood’s at the Orchards, where they found hams and cuts of meat untouched, pork pies imbued with the smell of the fire, and freshly churned butter—everything that a leisurely appetite could desire, perhaps in greater quality, though not in greater quantity, than at Squire Cass’s.
For the Squire’s wife had died long ago, and the Red House was without that presence of the wife and mother which is the fountain of wholesome love and fear in parlour and kitchen; and this helped to account not only for there being more profusion than finished excellence in the holiday provisions, but also for the frequency with which the proud Squire condescended to preside in the parlour of the Rainbow rather than under the shadow of his own dark wainscot; perhaps, also, for the fact that his sons had turned out rather ill. Raveloe was not a place where moral censure was severe, but it was thought a weakness in the Squire that he had kept all his sons at home in idleness; and though some licence was to be allowed to young men whose fathers could afford it, people shook their heads at the courses of the second son, Dunstan, commonly called Dunsey Cass, whose taste for swopping and betting might turn out to be a sowing of something worse than wild oats. To be sure, the neighbours said, it was no matter what became of Dunsey—a spiteful jeering fellow, who seemed to enjoy his drink the more when other people went dry—always provided that his doings did not bring trouble on a family like Squire Cass’s, with a monument in the church, and tankards older than King George. But it would be a thousand pities if Mr. Godfrey, the eldest, a fine open-faced good-natured young man who was to come into the land some day, should take to going along the same road with his brother, as he had seemed to do of late. If he went on in that way, he would lose Miss Nancy Lammeter; for it was well known that she had looked very shyly on him ever since last Whitsuntide twelvemonth, when there was so much talk about his being away from home days and days together. There was something wrong, more than common—that was quite clear; for Mr. Godfrey didn’t look half so fresh-coloured and open as he used to do. At one time everybody was saying, What a handsome couple he and Miss Nancy Lammeter would make! and if she could come to be mistress at the Red House, there would be a fine change, for the Lammeters had been brought up in that way, that they never suffered a pinch of salt to be wasted, and yet everybody in their household had of the best, according to his place. Such a daughter-in-law would be a saving to the old Squire, if she never brought a penny to her fortune; for it was to be feared that, notwithstanding his incomings, there were more holes in his pocket than the one where he put his own hand in. But if Mr. Godfrey didn’t turn over a new leaf, he might say “Good-bye” to Miss Nancy Lammeter.
For the Squire’s wife had passed away long ago, and the Red House felt the absence of the wife and mother, which brings genuine love and comfort to the home; this may explain not only why there was more abundance than true quality in the holiday preparations but also why the proud Squire often chose to hang out in the parlor of the Rainbow instead of his own dark living room. It might also shed light on why his sons had turned out poorly. Raveloe wasn’t a place known for strict moral judgment, but people considered it a weakness in the Squire to let all his sons lounge around doing nothing. While some leeway was granted to young men whose fathers could afford it, the community disapproved of the second son, Dunstan, known as Dunsey Cass, whose love for trading and gambling hinted at worse behavior than mere youthful indiscretion. Of course, neighbors said it didn’t matter what happened to Dunsey—a nasty, mocking guy who seemed to enjoy his drinks even more when others were sober—as long as his actions didn’t cause trouble for a family like Squire Cass’s, which had a memorial in the church and tankards older than King George. But it would be a real shame if Mr. Godfrey, the eldest son, a nice, good-natured young man who was set to inherit the land someday, started following in his brother's footsteps, as it seemed he had been lately. If he kept this up, he might lose Miss Nancy Lammeter; it was well-known that she had been rather shy around him ever since last Whitsun a year ago when there had been so much gossip about his long absences from home. Something was clearly wrong because Mr. Godfrey didn’t look as healthy and cheerful as he used to. Everyone once said what a beautiful couple he and Miss Nancy Lammeter would make! If she became the lady of the Red House, it would be a fantastic change, as the Lammeters had always been raised to avoid wasting anything, yet everyone in their household received the best according to their status. Such a daughter-in-law would save the old Squire money, even if she didn’t bring a dime to the marriage; there were worries that, despite his earnings, there were more holes in his pockets than just the one where he put his hand. But if Mr. Godfrey didn’t change his ways, he might as well say “Goodbye” to Miss Nancy Lammeter.
It was the once hopeful Godfrey who was standing, with his hands in his side-pockets and his back to the fire, in the dark wainscoted parlour, one late November afternoon in that fifteenth year of Silas Marner’s life at Raveloe. The fading grey light fell dimly on the walls decorated with guns, whips, and foxes’ brushes, on coats and hats flung on the chairs, on tankards sending forth a scent of flat ale, and on a half-choked fire, with pipes propped up in the chimney-corners: signs of a domestic life destitute of any hallowing charm, with which the look of gloomy vexation on Godfrey’s blond face was in sad accordance. He seemed to be waiting and listening for some one’s approach, and presently the sound of a heavy step, with an accompanying whistle, was heard across the large empty entrance-hall.
It was the once hopeful Godfrey who stood with his hands in his side pockets and his back to the fire in the dark paneled parlor on a late November afternoon during the fifteenth year of Silas Marner’s life in Raveloe. The fading gray light dimly illuminated the walls adorned with guns, whips, and fox brushes, on coats and hats tossed over the chairs, on tankards releasing a scent of flat ale, and on a half-smothered fire, with pipes propped up in the corners of the chimney: signs of a home life lacking any meaningful charm, which matched the look of gloomy frustration on Godfrey’s blond face. He seemed to be waiting and listening for someone to arrive, and soon, the sound of a heavy step accompanied by whistling echoed through the large empty entrance hall.
The door opened, and a thick-set, heavy-looking young man entered, with the flushed face and the gratuitously elated bearing which mark the first stage of intoxication. It was Dunsey, and at the sight of him Godfrey’s face parted with some of its gloom to take on the more active expression of hatred. The handsome brown spaniel that lay on the hearth retreated under the chair in the chimney-corner.
The door swung open, and a stocky, hefty young man walked in, his face flushed and his demeanor overly cheerful, typical of someone at the early stages of drunkenness. It was Dunsey, and seeing him made Godfrey’s face lose some of its sadness, shifting instead to a more intense look of anger. The good-looking brown spaniel that was lying by the fireplace crawled under the chair in the corner.
“Well, Master Godfrey, what do you want with me?” said Dunsey, in a mocking tone. “You’re my elders and betters, you know; I was obliged to come when you sent for me.”
“Well, Master Godfrey, what do you want from me?” said Dunsey, in a mocking tone. “You’re my elders and betters, you know; I had to come when you called for me.”
“Why, this is what I want—and just shake yourself sober and listen, will you?” said Godfrey, savagely. He had himself been drinking more than was good for him, trying to turn his gloom into uncalculating anger. “I want to tell you, I must hand over that rent of Fowler’s to the Squire, or else tell him I gave it you; for he’s threatening to distrain for it, and it’ll all be out soon, whether I tell him or not. He said, just now, before he went out, he should send word to Cox to distrain, if Fowler didn’t come and pay up his arrears this week. The Squire’s short o’ cash, and in no humour to stand any nonsense; and you know what he threatened, if ever he found you making away with his money again. So, see and get the money, and pretty quickly, will you?”
“Look, this is what I want—so just snap out of it and listen, okay?” said Godfrey angrily. He had been drinking more than he should, trying to turn his sadness into reckless anger. “I need to let the Squire know that I’m handing over Fowler’s rent, or else tell him I gave it to you; because he’s threatening to seize it, and it’s going to come out soon, whether I say something or not. He just said before he left that he would tell Cox to seize things if Fowler didn’t come and pay his back rent this week. The Squire’s low on cash and not in the mood for any nonsense; and you know what he threatened if he ever caught you taking his money again. So, make sure you get the money, and do it fast, will you?”
“Oh!” said Dunsey, sneeringly, coming nearer to his brother and looking in his face. “Suppose, now, you get the money yourself, and save me the trouble, eh? Since you was so kind as to hand it over to me, you’ll not refuse me the kindness to pay it back for me: it was your brotherly love made you do it, you know.”
“Oh!” Dunsey said with a sneer, moving closer to his brother and looking him in the face. “How about you just get the money yourself and save me the trouble, huh? Since you were so nice to hand it over to me, you wouldn’t mind returning it for me, would you? It was your brotherly love that made you do it, you know.”
Godfrey bit his lips and clenched his fist. “Don’t come near me with that look, else I’ll knock you down.”
Godfrey bit his lips and clenched his fist. “Don’t come near me with that look, or I’ll knock you down.”
“Oh no, you won’t,” said Dunsey, turning away on his heel, however. “Because I’m such a good-natured brother, you know. I might get you turned out of house and home, and cut off with a shilling any day. I might tell the Squire how his handsome son was married to that nice young woman, Molly Farren, and was very unhappy because he couldn’t live with his drunken wife, and I should slip into your place as comfortable as could be. But you see, I don’t do it—I’m so easy and good-natured. You’ll take any trouble for me. You’ll get the hundred pounds for me—I know you will.”
“Oh no, you won’t,” said Dunsey, turning away on his heel, though. “Because I’m such a good-natured brother, you know. I could kick you out of your home and cut you off with a shilling any day. I could tell the Squire how his handsome son was married to that nice young woman, Molly Farren, and was really unhappy because he couldn’t live with his drunk wife, and I would slip right into your place without a hitch. But you see, I don’t do that—I’m so easygoing and good-natured. You’ll do anything for me. You’ll get the hundred pounds for me—I know you will.”
“How can I get the money?” said Godfrey, quivering. “I haven’t a shilling to bless myself with. And it’s a lie that you’d slip into my place: you’d get yourself turned out too, that’s all. For if you begin telling tales, I’ll follow. Bob’s my father’s favourite—you know that very well. He’d only think himself well rid of you.”
“How am I supposed to get the money?” said Godfrey, trembling. “I don’t have a penny to my name. And it’s not true that you could take my place: you’d just end up getting kicked out too, that’s all. Because if you start spilling secrets, I’ll be right behind you. Bob’s my father’s favorite—you know that for sure. He’d just think he’s better off without you.”
“Never mind,” said Dunsey, nodding his head sideways as he looked out of the window. “It ’ud be very pleasant to me to go in your company—you’re such a handsome brother, and we’ve always been so fond of quarrelling with one another, I shouldn’t know what to do without you. But you’d like better for us both to stay at home together; I know you would. So you’ll manage to get that little sum o’ money, and I’ll bid you good-bye, though I’m sorry to part.”
“Forget it,” said Dunsey, nodding his head sideways as he looked out the window. “It would be really nice to hang out with you—you’re such a good-looking brother, and we’ve always enjoyed bickering with each other. I wouldn't know what to do without you. But I know you’d prefer for us both to stay home together; I really do. So, you handle getting that little bit of money, and I’ll say goodbye, even though I’m sad to leave.”
Dunstan was moving off, but Godfrey rushed after him and seized him by the arm, saying, with an oath—
Dunstan was walking away, but Godfrey chased after him and grabbed him by the arm, swearing—
“I tell you, I have no money: I can get no money.”
“I’m telling you, I have no money: I can’t get any money.”
“Borrow of old Kimble.”
"Borrow from old Kimble."
“I tell you, he won’t lend me any more, and I shan’t ask him.”
“I tell you, he won't lend me anything else, and I won't ask him.”
“Well, then, sell Wildfire.”
"Well, then, sell Wildfire."
“Yes, that’s easy talking. I must have the money directly.”
“Yes, it’s easy to say that. I need the money right away.”
“Well, you’ve only got to ride him to the hunt to-morrow. There’ll be Bryce and Keating there, for sure. You’ll get more bids than one.”
"Well, all you have to do is take him to the hunt tomorrow. Bryce and Keating will definitely be there. You’ll get more than one offer."
“I daresay, and get back home at eight o’clock, splashed up to the chin. I’m going to Mrs. Osgood’s birthday dance.”
“I bet I'll get home by eight o’clock, completely soaked. I’m going to Mrs. Osgood’s birthday dance.”
“Oho!” said Dunsey, turning his head on one side, and trying to speak in a small mincing treble. “And there’s sweet Miss Nancy coming; and we shall dance with her, and promise never to be naughty again, and be taken into favour, and—”
“Oho!” said Dunsey, tilting his head to the side and trying to speak in a high-pitched, delicate voice. “And here comes sweet Miss Nancy; we’ll dance with her, promise to be good from now on, and win back her favor, and—”
“Hold your tongue about Miss Nancy, you fool,” said Godfrey, turning red, “else I’ll throttle you.”
“Shut up about Miss Nancy, you idiot,” Godfrey said, his face turning red, “or I’ll choke you.”
“What for?” said Dunsey, still in an artificial tone, but taking a whip from the table and beating the butt-end of it on his palm. “You’ve a very good chance. I’d advise you to creep up her sleeve again: it ’ud be saving time, if Molly should happen to take a drop too much laudanum some day, and make a widower of you. Miss Nancy wouldn’t mind being a second, if she didn’t know it. And you’ve got a good-natured brother, who’ll keep your secret well, because you’ll be so very obliging to him.”
“What for?” Dunsey replied, still using a forced tone but picking up a whip from the table and tapping the end of it against his palm. “You’ve got a really good chance. I’d suggest you sneak back into her good graces: it would save time if Molly ever takes a little too much laudanum and ends up making you a widower. Miss Nancy wouldn’t mind being a second choice, as long as she doesn’t find out. And you’ve got a good-natured brother who’ll keep your secret safe because you’ll be so accommodating to him.”
“I’ll tell you what it is,” said Godfrey, quivering, and pale again, “my patience is pretty near at an end. If you’d a little more sharpness in you, you might know that you may urge a man a bit too far, and make one leap as easy as another. I don’t know but what it is so now: I may as well tell the Squire everything myself—I should get you off my back, if I got nothing else. And, after all, he’ll know some time. She’s been threatening to come herself and tell him. So, don’t flatter yourself that your secrecy’s worth any price you choose to ask. You drain me of money till I have got nothing to pacify her with, and she’ll do as she threatens some day. It’s all one. I’ll tell my father everything myself, and you may go to the devil.”
“I’ll tell you what it is,” Godfrey said, trembling and pale again, “my patience is running out. If you were a bit sharper, you might realize that you can push a man too far, and make one choice as easy as another. I’m starting to think that might be the case now: I might as well tell the Squire everything myself—I’d get you off my back, even if that’s all I gain. And anyway, he’s going to find out eventually. She’s been threatening to come and tell him herself. So don’t kid yourself that your secrecy is worth any price you want to ask. You’re draining me of money until I have nothing to calm her with, and she’ll follow through on her threats one of these days. It’s all the same. I’ll tell my father everything myself, and you can go to hell.”
Dunsey perceived that he had overshot his mark, and that there was a point at which even the hesitating Godfrey might be driven into decision. But he said, with an air of unconcern—
Dunsey realized that he had gone too far and that there was a moment when even the reluctant Godfrey might be pushed to make a choice. But he said, with an attitude of indifference—
“As you please; but I’ll have a draught of ale first.” And ringing the bell, he threw himself across two chairs, and began to rap the window-seat with the handle of his whip.
“As you wish; but I’ll have a drink of beer first.” Then he rang the bell, threw himself across two chairs, and started tapping the window seat with the handle of his whip.
Godfrey stood, still with his back to the fire, uneasily moving his fingers among the contents of his side-pockets, and looking at the floor. That big muscular frame of his held plenty of animal courage, but helped him to no decision when the dangers to be braved were such as could neither be knocked down nor throttled. His natural irresolution and moral cowardice were exaggerated by a position in which dreaded consequences seemed to press equally on all sides, and his irritation had no sooner provoked him to defy Dunstan and anticipate all possible betrayals, than the miseries he must bring on himself by such a step seemed more unendurable to him than the present evil. The results of confession were not contingent, they were certain; whereas betrayal was not certain. From the near vision of that certainty he fell back on suspense and vacillation with a sense of repose. The disinherited son of a small squire, equally disinclined to dig and to beg, was almost as helpless as an uprooted tree, which, by the favour of earth and sky, has grown to a handsome bulk on the spot where it first shot upward. Perhaps it would have been possible to think of digging with some cheerfulness if Nancy Lammeter were to be won on those terms; but, since he must irrevocably lose her as well as the inheritance, and must break every tie but the one that degraded him and left him without motive for trying to recover his better self, he could imagine no future for himself on the other side of confession but that of “’listing for a soldier”—the most desperate step, short of suicide, in the eyes of respectable families. No! he would rather trust to casualties than to his own resolve—rather go on sitting at the feast, and sipping the wine he loved, though with the sword hanging over him and terror in his heart, than rush away into the cold darkness where there was no pleasure left. The utmost concession to Dunstan about the horse began to seem easy, compared with the fulfilment of his own threat. But his pride would not let him recommence the conversation otherwise than by continuing the quarrel. Dunstan was waiting for this, and took his ale in shorter draughts than usual.
Godfrey stood with his back to the fire, anxiously fiddling with the items in his side pockets and staring at the floor. His strong, muscular body had plenty of physical bravery, but it didn’t help him make decisions when the dangers he faced couldn't be fought or strangled. His natural indecisiveness and lack of moral courage were intensified by a situation where the fearful outcomes seemed to press in on him from all sides. Just as his irritation pushed him to stand up to Dunstan and consider all possible betrayals, the thought of the suffering he would bring upon himself by taking that step felt more unbearable than the current misery he was in. The consequences of confessing were clear and certain, while betrayal was uncertain. Faced with that certainty, he recoiled into uncertainty and hesitation, feeling a strange sense of calm. The disinherited son of a minor landowner, equally unwilling to work or beg, felt almost as powerless as a tree uprooted, that had grown strong and large thanks to the earth and sky, only to be suddenly displaced. Maybe he could have considered the idea of digging with some hope if it meant winning over Nancy Lammeter; however, since he would have to irrevocably lose her and the inheritance, and would break every tie except the one that humiliated him and gave him no motivation to reclaim his better self, he envisioned no future after confessing other than “enlisting as a soldier”—the most desperate move, short of suicide, in the eyes of respectable families. No! He preferred to trust random outcomes instead of his own determination—rather continue sitting at the feast, enjoying the wine he loved, even with the sword hanging over him and fear in his heart, than run off into the cold darkness where there was no joy left. Even the idea of giving in to Dunstan about the horse started to seem easier compared to following through on his own threat. But his pride wouldn’t let him restart the conversation unless he continued the argument. Dunstan was ready for this and took his ale in shorter sips than usual.
“It’s just like you,” Godfrey burst out, in a bitter tone, “to talk about my selling Wildfire in that cool way—the last thing I’ve got to call my own, and the best bit of horse-flesh I ever had in my life. And if you’d got a spark of pride in you, you’d be ashamed to see the stables emptied, and everybody sneering about it. But it’s my belief you’d sell yourself, if it was only for the pleasure of making somebody feel he’d got a bad bargain.”
“It’s just like you,” Godfrey exclaimed bitterly, “to talk about me selling Wildfire so casually—the last thing I have that’s truly mine, and the best horse I’ve ever owned. If you had any pride at all, you’d be ashamed to see the stables empty and everyone making fun of it. But I honestly believe you’d sell yourself if it meant you could just make someone feel like they got a bad deal.”
“Aye, aye,” said Dunstan, very placably, “you do me justice, I see. You know I’m a jewel for ’ticing people into bargains. For which reason I advise you to let me sell Wildfire. I’d ride him to the hunt to-morrow for you, with pleasure. I shouldn’t look so handsome as you in the saddle, but it’s the horse they’ll bid for, and not the rider.”
“Sure, sure,” said Dunstan, quite calmly, “you’re right about me, I see. You know I’m great at getting people into deals. For that reason, I suggest you let me sell Wildfire. I’d be happy to ride him to the hunt tomorrow for you. I might not look as good as you in the saddle, but it’s the horse they’ll be bidding on, not the rider.”
“Yes, I daresay—trust my horse to you!”
“Yes, I must say—trust my horse to you!”
“As you please,” said Dunstan, rapping the window-seat again with an air of great unconcern. “It’s you have got to pay Fowler’s money; it’s none of my business. You received the money from him when you went to Bramcote, and you told the Squire it wasn’t paid. I’d nothing to do with that; you chose to be so obliging as to give it me, that was all. If you don’t want to pay the money, let it alone; it’s all one to me. But I was willing to accommodate you by undertaking to sell the horse, seeing it’s not convenient to you to go so far to-morrow.”
“As you wish,” said Dunstan, knocking on the window seat again with a carefree attitude. “It’s you who has to pay Fowler’s money; it’s none of my concern. You got the money from him when you went to Bramcote, and you told the Squire it wasn’t paid. That had nothing to do with me; you decided to be kind enough to give it to me, that’s all. If you don’t want to pay the money, just forget it; it doesn’t bother me. But I was willing to help you by selling the horse, since it’s not convenient for you to go that far tomorrow.”
Godfrey was silent for some moments. He would have liked to spring on Dunstan, wrench the whip from his hand, and flog him to within an inch of his life; and no bodily fear could have deterred him; but he was mastered by another sort of fear, which was fed by feelings stronger even than his resentment. When he spoke again, it was in a half-conciliatory tone.
Godfrey stayed quiet for a few moments. He wanted to jump on Dunstan, snatch the whip from his hand, and beat him within an inch of his life; and no physical fear could have held him back. But he was overwhelmed by a different kind of fear, fueled by feelings even deeper than his anger. When he finally spoke again, his tone was somewhat conciliatory.
“Well, you mean no nonsense about the horse, eh? You’ll sell him all fair, and hand over the money? If you don’t, you know, everything ’ull go to smash, for I’ve got nothing else to trust to. And you’ll have less pleasure in pulling the house over my head, when your own skull’s to be broken too.”
“Well, you’re not messing around with the horse, right? You’ll sell him fair and square and give me the money? If you don’t, everything is going to fall apart, because I have nothing else to rely on. And you’ll enjoy tearing the roof down on me a lot less when your own head’s at risk too.”
“Aye, aye,” said Dunstan, rising; “all right. I thought you’d come round. I’m the fellow to bring old Bryce up to the scratch. I’ll get you a hundred and twenty for him, if I get you a penny.”
“Aye, aye,” said Dunstan, getting up; “sounds good. I knew you’d come around. I’m the guy who’ll get old Bryce in shape. I’ll get you a hundred and twenty for him, if I get you a penny.”
“But it’ll perhaps rain cats and dogs to-morrow, as it did yesterday, and then you can’t go,” said Godfrey, hardly knowing whether he wished for that obstacle or not.
“But it might rain heavily tomorrow, just like it did yesterday, and then you won't be able to go,” said Godfrey, unsure if he wanted that to happen or not.
“Not it,” said Dunstan. “I’m always lucky in my weather. It might rain if you wanted to go yourself. You never hold trumps, you know—I always do. You’ve got the beauty, you see, and I’ve got the luck, so you must keep me by you for your crooked sixpence; you’ll ne-ver get along without me.”
“Not it,” said Dunstan. “I’m always lucky with the weather. It might rain if you wanted to go yourself. You never have the upper hand, you know—I always do. You’ve got the looks, and I’ve got the luck, so you need to keep me around for your crooked sixpence; you’ll ne-ver get by without me.”
“Confound you, hold your tongue!” said Godfrey, impetuously. “And take care to keep sober to-morrow, else you’ll get pitched on your head coming home, and Wildfire might be the worse for it.”
“Damn you, shut up!” said Godfrey, impulsively. “And make sure you stay sober tomorrow, or you’ll end up falling on your head coming home, and Wildfire might pay the price for it.”
“Make your tender heart easy,” said Dunstan, opening the door. “You never knew me see double when I’d got a bargain to make; it ’ud spoil the fun. Besides, whenever I fall, I’m warranted to fall on my legs.”
“Make your soft heart easy,” said Dunstan, opening the door. “You never saw me hesitate when I had a deal to make; it would ruin the fun. Plus, whenever I stumble, I’m sure to land on my feet.”
With that, Dunstan slammed the door behind him, and left Godfrey to that bitter rumination on his personal circumstances which was now unbroken from day to day save by the excitement of sporting, drinking, card-playing, or the rarer and less oblivious pleasure of seeing Miss Nancy Lammeter. The subtle and varied pains springing from the higher sensibility that accompanies higher culture, are perhaps less pitiable than that dreary absence of impersonal enjoyment and consolation which leaves ruder minds to the perpetual urgent companionship of their own griefs and discontents. The lives of those rural forefathers, whom we are apt to think very prosaic figures—men whose only work was to ride round their land, getting heavier and heavier in their saddles, and who passed the rest of their days in the half-listless gratification of senses dulled by monotony—had a certain pathos in them nevertheless. Calamities came to them too, and their early errors carried hard consequences: perhaps the love of some sweet maiden, the image of purity, order, and calm, had opened their eyes to the vision of a life in which the days would not seem too long, even without rioting; but the maiden was lost, and the vision passed away, and then what was left to them, especially when they had become too heavy for the hunt, or for carrying a gun over the furrows, but to drink and get merry, or to drink and get angry, so that they might be independent of variety, and say over again with eager emphasis the things they had said already any time that twelvemonth? Assuredly, among these flushed and dull-eyed men there were some whom—thanks to their native human-kindness—even riot could never drive into brutality; men who, when their cheeks were fresh, had felt the keen point of sorrow or remorse, had been pierced by the reeds they leaned on, or had lightly put their limbs in fetters from which no struggle could loose them; and under these sad circumstances, common to us all, their thoughts could find no resting-place outside the ever-trodden round of their own petty history.
With that, Dunstan slammed the door behind him, leaving Godfrey to his bitter thoughts about his personal situation, which went uninterrupted from day to day, except for the excitement of sports, drinking, gambling, or the rarer pleasure of seeing Miss Nancy Lammeter. The subtle and varied pains that come from the heightened sensitivity of a more cultured life are perhaps less pitiable than the dreary lack of impersonal enjoyment and comfort that leaves simpler minds with an ongoing battle against their own sorrows and discontent. The lives of those rural ancestors, who we tend to see as very ordinary—men whose only job was to ride around their land, growing heavier in their saddles, and who spent the rest of their days in the half-hearted enjoyment of senses dulled by monotony—had a certain poignancy nonetheless. They faced calamities as well, and their early mistakes had serious consequences: perhaps the love of some sweet maiden, the image of purity, order, and calm, had opened their eyes to the possibility of a life where the days wouldn’t feel too long, even without wild partying; but the maiden was lost, and that vision faded away. So, what was left for them, especially once they were too heavy for the hunt or for carrying a gun over the fields, but to drink and have a good time, or to drink and get angry, so they could free themselves from monotony and repeat, with eager emphasis, the things they had already said at any point in the past year? Surely, among these flushed and dull-eyed men, there were some who—thanks to their innate kindness—could never be driven to brutality by even the wildest revelry; men who, when their faces were still fresh, had felt the sharp sting of sorrow or regret, had been pierced by the very things they leaned on, or had easily shackled themselves with burdens from which no struggle could free them; and under these sad circumstances, common to us all, their thoughts could find no rest outside the endless cycle of their own trivial history.
That, at least, was the condition of Godfrey Cass in this six-and-twentieth year of his life. A movement of compunction, helped by those small indefinable influences which every personal relation exerts on a pliant nature, had urged him into a secret marriage, which was a blight on his life. It was an ugly story of low passion, delusion, and waking from delusion, which needs not to be dragged from the privacy of Godfrey’s bitter memory. He had long known that the delusion was partly due to a trap laid for him by Dunstan, who saw in his brother’s degrading marriage the means of gratifying at once his jealous hate and his cupidity. And if Godfrey could have felt himself simply a victim, the iron bit that destiny had put into his mouth would have chafed him less intolerably. If the curses he muttered half aloud when he was alone had had no other object than Dunstan’s diabolical cunning, he might have shrunk less from the consequences of avowal. But he had something else to curse—his own vicious folly, which now seemed as mad and unaccountable to him as almost all our follies and vices do when their promptings have long passed away. For four years he had thought of Nancy Lammeter, and wooed her with tacit patient worship, as the woman who made him think of the future with joy: she would be his wife, and would make home lovely to him, as his father’s home had never been; and it would be easy, when she was always near, to shake off those foolish habits that were no pleasures, but only a feverish way of annulling vacancy. Godfrey’s was an essentially domestic nature, bred up in a home where the hearth had no smiles, and where the daily habits were not chastised by the presence of household order. His easy disposition made him fall in unresistingly with the family courses, but the need of some tender permanent affection, the longing for some influence that would make the good he preferred easy to pursue, caused the neatness, purity, and liberal orderliness of the Lammeter household, sunned by the smile of Nancy, to seem like those fresh bright hours of the morning when temptations go to sleep and leave the ear open to the voice of the good angel, inviting to industry, sobriety, and peace. And yet the hope of this paradise had not been enough to save him from a course which shut him out of it for ever. Instead of keeping fast hold of the strong silken rope by which Nancy would have drawn him safe to the green banks where it was easy to step firmly, he had let himself be dragged back into mud and slime, in which it was useless to struggle. He had made ties for himself which robbed him of all wholesome motive, and were a constant exasperation.
That, at least, was the situation for Godfrey Cass in his twenty-sixth year. A sense of guilt, combined with those subtle influences that every personal relationship has on a flexible personality, had pushed him into a secret marriage that overshadowed his life. It was an ugly story of base desire, illusion, and waking from that illusion, which doesn't need to be pulled from the depths of Godfrey’s painful memory. He had long realized that the delusion was partly due to a trap set by Dunstan, who saw his brother’s degrading marriage as a way to satisfy both his jealousy and greed. If Godfrey could have considered himself merely a victim, the harsh reality he faced might have been less unbearable. If the curses he muttered to himself when alone had only been aimed at Dunstan’s wicked schemes, he might have been less afraid of the consequences of admitting the truth. But he had something else to curse—his own reckless foolishness, which now seemed as irrational and inexplicable to him as most of our follies and vices do once their initial excitement has faded. For four years, he had thought of Nancy Lammeter and admired her with quiet, patient love, seeing her as the woman who made him look forward to the future with happiness: she would be his wife and would make home beautiful for him, unlike his father's home; and it would be easy to shed those foolish habits that brought him no joy, but only a frantic way to escape emptiness, with her always by his side. Godfrey was inherently domestic, having grown up in a home devoid of warmth and where daily life lacked the comfort of order. His easy-going nature allowed him to go along with family customs, but the need for some lasting affection, the yearning for an influence that would make pursuing the good he preferred easier, made the neatness, purity, and welcoming environment of the Lammeter home, brightened by Nancy's smile, feel like those fresh, bright mornings when temptations take a break, leaving the mind open to the voice of the good angel, encouraging hard work, moderation, and peace. Yet, the hope of this paradise wasn’t enough to save him from a path that shut him out of it forever. Instead of holding tightly to the strong, soft rope that Nancy could have used to pull him safely to solid ground, he allowed himself to be dragged back into the muck and mire, where struggling was pointless. He had formed bonds that took away all healthy motivation and were a constant source of frustration.
Still, there was one position worse than the present: it was the position he would be in when the ugly secret was disclosed; and the desire that continually triumphed over every other was that of warding off the evil day, when he would have to bear the consequences of his father’s violent resentment for the wound inflicted on his family pride—would have, perhaps, to turn his back on that hereditary ease and dignity which, after all, was a sort of reason for living, and would carry with him the certainty that he was banished for ever from the sight and esteem of Nancy Lammeter. The longer the interval, the more chance there was of deliverance from some, at least, of the hateful consequences to which he had sold himself; the more opportunities remained for him to snatch the strange gratification of seeing Nancy, and gathering some faint indications of her lingering regard. Towards this gratification he was impelled, fitfully, every now and then, after having passed weeks in which he had avoided her as the far-off bright-winged prize that only made him spring forward and find his chain all the more galling. One of those fits of yearning was on him now, and it would have been strong enough to have persuaded him to trust Wildfire to Dunstan rather than disappoint the yearning, even if he had not had another reason for his disinclination towards the morrow’s hunt. That other reason was the fact that the morning’s meet was near Batherley, the market-town where the unhappy woman lived, whose image became more odious to him every day; and to his thought the whole vicinage was haunted by her. The yoke a man creates for himself by wrong-doing will breed hate in the kindliest nature; and the good-humoured, affectionate-hearted Godfrey Cass was fast becoming a bitter man, visited by cruel wishes, that seemed to enter, and depart, and enter again, like demons who had found in him a ready-garnished home.
Still, there was one situation worse than the current one: it was the situation he would be in when the ugly secret was revealed; and the desire that constantly overshadowed everything else was to keep that day at bay, when he would have to face his father's furious anger about the injury done to his family pride—would have, perhaps, to turn his back on the hereditary comfort and dignity that, after all, was a reason for living, and would carry with him the certainty that he was permanently cut off from the sight and approval of Nancy Lammeter. The longer he waited, the more chance there was for relief from at least some of the awful consequences of the bargain he had struck; the more opportunities were left for him to seize the strange pleasure of seeing Nancy and picking up some hints of her lingering feelings. He was occasionally driven by this desire, every now and then, after having spent weeks avoiding her like a distant, bright-winged prize that only made him leap forward and feel the chains more painfully. One of those powerful urges hit him now, strong enough to persuade him to trust Wildfire to Dunstan rather than face the disappointment of that longing, even if he didn’t have another reason for his reluctance about tomorrow’s hunt. That other reason was the fact that the morning meeting was near Batherley, the market town where the unhappy woman lived, whose image became more unbearable to him every day; and he felt like the whole area was haunted by her. The burden a man creates for himself through wrongdoing breeds hatred even in the kindest nature; and the good-natured, warm-hearted Godfrey Cass was quickly becoming bitter, plagued by cruel thoughts that seemed to come and go like demons who had found a welcoming home in him.
What was he to do this evening to pass the time? He might as well go to the Rainbow, and hear the talk about the cock-fighting: everybody was there, and what else was there to be done? Though, for his own part, he did not care a button for cock-fighting. Snuff, the brown spaniel, who had placed herself in front of him, and had been watching him for some time, now jumped up in impatience for the expected caress. But Godfrey thrust her away without looking at her, and left the room, followed humbly by the unresenting Snuff—perhaps because she saw no other career open to her.
What was he going to do tonight to pass the time? He might as well head to the Rainbow and listen to the gossip about cock-fighting: everyone was there, and what else was there to do? Although, to be honest, he didn’t care at all about cock-fighting. Snuff, the brown spaniel, who had positioned herself in front of him and had been watching him for a while, now jumped up eagerly for the expected attention. But Godfrey pushed her away without even looking at her and left the room, followed quietly by the forgiving Snuff—maybe because she saw no other option.
CHAPTER IV.
Dunstan Cass, setting off in the raw morning, at the judiciously quiet pace of a man who is obliged to ride to cover on his hunter, had to take his way along the lane which, at its farther extremity, passed by the piece of unenclosed ground called the Stone-pit, where stood the cottage, once a stone-cutter’s shed, now for fifteen years inhabited by Silas Marner. The spot looked very dreary at this season, with the moist trodden clay about it, and the red, muddy water high up in the deserted quarry. That was Dunstan’s first thought as he approached it; the second was, that the old fool of a weaver, whose loom he heard rattling already, had a great deal of money hidden somewhere. How was it that he, Dunstan Cass, who had often heard talk of Marner’s miserliness, had never thought of suggesting to Godfrey that he should frighten or persuade the old fellow into lending the money on the excellent security of the young Squire’s prospects? The resource occurred to him now as so easy and agreeable, especially as Marner’s hoard was likely to be large enough to leave Godfrey a handsome surplus beyond his immediate needs, and enable him to accommodate his faithful brother, that he had almost turned the horse’s head towards home again. Godfrey would be ready enough to accept the suggestion: he would snatch eagerly at a plan that might save him from parting with Wildfire. But when Dunstan’s meditation reached this point, the inclination to go on grew strong and prevailed. He didn’t want to give Godfrey that pleasure: he preferred that Master Godfrey should be vexed. Moreover, Dunstan enjoyed the self-important consciousness of having a horse to sell, and the opportunity of driving a bargain, swaggering, and possibly taking somebody in. He might have all the satisfaction attendant on selling his brother’s horse, and not the less have the further satisfaction of setting Godfrey to borrow Marner’s money. So he rode on to cover.
Dunstan Cass, setting off in the chilly morning, at the deliberately slow pace of someone who has to ride to a hunt on his horse, had to take the lane that, at its far end, went by the piece of open land called the Stone-pit, where the cottage stood, once a stone-cutter’s shed, now inhabited by Silas Marner for the past fifteen years. The place looked quite gloomy at this time of year, with the wet, packed clay around it and the red, muddy water high in the abandoned quarry. That was Dunstan’s first thought as he got closer; his second was that the old weaver, whose loom he could already hear clattering, had a significant amount of money hidden somewhere. How come he, Dunstan Cass, who had often heard about Marner’s stinginess, had never thought of suggesting to Godfrey that he should scare or persuade the old man into lending money against the solid promise of the young Squire's future? The idea struck him now as so simple and appealing, especially since Marner’s stash was likely big enough to leave Godfrey with a nice extra amount after covering his immediate needs and even help his loyal brother out, that he nearly turned his horse around to head home again. Godfrey would surely be eager to take the suggestion: he would grab at a plan that might keep him from having to sell Wildfire. But as Dunstan’s thoughts got to this point, his desire to continue grew stronger and won out. He didn’t want to give Godfrey that satisfaction: he preferred for Master Godfrey to be annoyed. Plus, Dunstan enjoyed the self-satisfied feeling of having a horse to sell, along with the chance to make a deal, show off, and maybe even trick someone. He could get all the satisfaction of selling his brother’s horse while also enjoying the further satisfaction of getting Godfrey to borrow Marner’s money. So he rode on to the hunt.
Bryce and Keating were there, as Dunstan was quite sure they would be—he was such a lucky fellow.
Bryce and Keating were there, just as Dunstan was pretty sure they would be—he was such a lucky guy.
“Heyday!” said Bryce, who had long had his eye on Wildfire, “you’re on your brother’s horse to-day: how’s that?”
“Heyday!” said Bryce, who had been keeping an eye on Wildfire for a while, “you’re riding your brother’s horse today: how’s that?”
“Oh, I’ve swopped with him,” said Dunstan, whose delight in lying, grandly independent of utility, was not to be diminished by the likelihood that his hearer would not believe him—“Wildfire’s mine now.”
“Oh, I’ve traded with him,” said Dunstan, whose joy in lying, completely detached from any usefulness, wasn’t lessened by the chance that his listener wouldn’t believe him—“Wildfire’s mine now.”
“What! has he swopped with you for that big-boned hack of yours?” said Bryce, quite aware that he should get another lie in answer.
“What! has he traded you for that big-boned horse of yours?” said Bryce, fully expecting to get another lie in response.
“Oh, there was a little account between us,” said Dunsey, carelessly, “and Wildfire made it even. I accommodated him by taking the horse, though it was against my will, for I’d got an itch for a mare o’ Jortin’s—as rare a bit o’ blood as ever you threw your leg across. But I shall keep Wildfire, now I’ve got him, though I’d a bid of a hundred and fifty for him the other day, from a man over at Flitton—he’s buying for Lord Cromleck—a fellow with a cast in his eye, and a green waistcoat. But I mean to stick to Wildfire: I shan’t get a better at a fence in a hurry. The mare’s got more blood, but she’s a bit too weak in the hind-quarters.”
“Oh, we had a little debt between us,” said Dunsey, casually, “and Wildfire settled it. I helped him out by taking the horse, even though I didn’t really want to, because I was itching for a mare from Jortin’s—she’s as rare a piece of bloodstock as you’ll ever ride. But now that I have Wildfire, I’ll keep him, even though I had an offer of one hundred and fifty for him the other day, from a guy over at Flitton—he's buying for Lord Cromleck—a guy with a squint and a green waistcoat. But I’m planning to hold onto Wildfire: I won’t find a better horse for jumping anytime soon. The mare has more bloodline, but she’s a bit too weak in the back end.”
Bryce of course divined that Dunstan wanted to sell the horse, and Dunstan knew that he divined it (horse-dealing is only one of many human transactions carried on in this ingenious manner); and they both considered that the bargain was in its first stage, when Bryce replied ironically—
Bryce obviously figured out that Dunstan wanted to sell the horse, and Dunstan realized that he had figured it out (horse trading is just one of many human dealings done in this clever way); and they both thought that the negotiation was in its early phase when Bryce responded sarcastically—
“I wonder at that now; I wonder you mean to keep him; for I never heard of a man who didn’t want to sell his horse getting a bid of half as much again as the horse was worth. You’ll be lucky if you get a hundred.”
“I wonder about that now; I’m surprised you plan to keep him, because I’ve never heard of a man who didn’t want to sell his horse getting a bid that was one-and-a-half times what the horse was worth. You’ll be lucky to get a hundred.”
Keating rode up now, and the transaction became more complicated. It ended in the purchase of the horse by Bryce for a hundred and twenty, to be paid on the delivery of Wildfire, safe and sound, at the Batherley stables. It did occur to Dunsey that it might be wise for him to give up the day’s hunting, proceed at once to Batherley, and, having waited for Bryce’s return, hire a horse to carry him home with the money in his pocket. But the inclination for a run, encouraged by confidence in his luck, and by a draught of brandy from his pocket-pistol at the conclusion of the bargain, was not easy to overcome, especially with a horse under him that would take the fences to the admiration of the field. Dunstan, however, took one fence too many, and got his horse pierced with a hedge-stake. His own ill-favoured person, which was quite unmarketable, escaped without injury; but poor Wildfire, unconscious of his price, turned on his flank and painfully panted his last. It happened that Dunstan, a short time before, having had to get down to arrange his stirrup, had muttered a good many curses at this interruption, which had thrown him in the rear of the hunt near the moment of glory, and under this exasperation had taken the fences more blindly. He would soon have been up with the hounds again, when the fatal accident happened; and hence he was between eager riders in advance, not troubling themselves about what happened behind them, and far-off stragglers, who were as likely as not to pass quite aloof from the line of road in which Wildfire had fallen. Dunstan, whose nature it was to care more for immediate annoyances than for remote consequences, no sooner recovered his legs, and saw that it was all over with Wildfire, than he felt a satisfaction at the absence of witnesses to a position which no swaggering could make enviable. Reinforcing himself, after his shake, with a little brandy and much swearing, he walked as fast as he could to a coppice on his right hand, through which it occurred to him that he could make his way to Batherley without danger of encountering any member of the hunt. His first intention was to hire a horse there and ride home forthwith, for to walk many miles without a gun in his hand, and along an ordinary road, was as much out of the question to him as to other spirited young men of his kind. He did not much mind about taking the bad news to Godfrey, for he had to offer him at the same time the resource of Marner’s money; and if Godfrey kicked, as he always did, at the notion of making a fresh debt from which he himself got the smallest share of advantage, why, he wouldn’t kick long: Dunstan felt sure he could worry Godfrey into anything. The idea of Marner’s money kept growing in vividness, now the want of it had become immediate; the prospect of having to make his appearance with the muddy boots of a pedestrian at Batherley, and to encounter the grinning queries of stablemen, stood unpleasantly in the way of his impatience to be back at Raveloe and carry out his felicitous plan; and a casual visitation of his waistcoat-pocket, as he was ruminating, awakened his memory to the fact that the two or three small coins his forefinger encountered there were of too pale a colour to cover that small debt, without payment of which the stable-keeper had declared he would never do any more business with Dunsey Cass. After all, according to the direction in which the run had brought him, he was not so very much farther from home than he was from Batherley; but Dunsey, not being remarkable for clearness of head, was only led to this conclusion by the gradual perception that there were other reasons for choosing the unprecedented course of walking home. It was now nearly four o’clock, and a mist was gathering: the sooner he got into the road the better. He remembered having crossed the road and seen the finger-post only a little while before Wildfire broke down; so, buttoning his coat, twisting the lash of his hunting-whip compactly round the handle, and rapping the tops of his boots with a self-possessed air, as if to assure himself that he was not at all taken by surprise, he set off with the sense that he was undertaking a remarkable feat of bodily exertion, which somehow and at some time he should be able to dress up and magnify to the admiration of a select circle at the Rainbow. When a young gentleman like Dunsey is reduced to so exceptional a mode of locomotion as walking, a whip in his hand is a desirable corrective to a too bewildering dreamy sense of unwontedness in his position; and Dunstan, as he went along through the gathering mist, was always rapping his whip somewhere. It was Godfrey’s whip, which he had chosen to take without leave because it had a gold handle; of course no one could see, when Dunstan held it, that the name Godfrey Cass was cut in deep letters on that gold handle—they could only see that it was a very handsome whip. Dunsey was not without fear that he might meet some acquaintance in whose eyes he would cut a pitiable figure, for mist is no screen when people get close to each other; but when he at last found himself in the well-known Raveloe lanes without having met a soul, he silently remarked that that was part of his usual good luck. But now the mist, helped by the evening darkness, was more of a screen than he desired, for it hid the ruts into which his feet were liable to slip—hid everything, so that he had to guide his steps by dragging his whip along the low bushes in advance of the hedgerow. He must soon, he thought, be getting near the opening at the Stone-pits: he should find it out by the break in the hedgerow. He found it out, however, by another circumstance which he had not expected—namely, by certain gleams of light, which he presently guessed to proceed from Silas Marner’s cottage. That cottage and the money hidden within it had been in his mind continually during his walk, and he had been imagining ways of cajoling and tempting the weaver to part with the immediate possession of his money for the sake of receiving interest. Dunstan felt as if there must be a little frightening added to the cajolery, for his own arithmetical convictions were not clear enough to afford him any forcible demonstration as to the advantages of interest; and as for security, he regarded it vaguely as a means of cheating a man by making him believe that he would be paid. Altogether, the operation on the miser’s mind was a task that Godfrey would be sure to hand over to his more daring and cunning brother: Dunstan had made up his mind to that; and by the time he saw the light gleaming through the chinks of Marner’s shutters, the idea of a dialogue with the weaver had become so familiar to him, that it occurred to him as quite a natural thing to make the acquaintance forthwith. There might be several conveniences attending this course: the weaver had possibly got a lantern, and Dunstan was tired of feeling his way. He was still nearly three-quarters of a mile from home, and the lane was becoming unpleasantly slippery, for the mist was passing into rain. He turned up the bank, not without some fear lest he might miss the right way, since he was not certain whether the light were in front or on the side of the cottage. But he felt the ground before him cautiously with his whip-handle, and at last arrived safely at the door. He knocked loudly, rather enjoying the idea that the old fellow would be frightened at the sudden noise. He heard no movement in reply: all was silence in the cottage. Was the weaver gone to bed, then? If so, why had he left a light? That was a strange forgetfulness in a miser. Dunstan knocked still more loudly, and, without pausing for a reply, pushed his fingers through the latch-hole, intending to shake the door and pull the latch-string up and down, not doubting that the door was fastened. But, to his surprise, at this double motion the door opened, and he found himself in front of a bright fire which lit up every corner of the cottage—the bed, the loom, the three chairs, and the table—and showed him that Marner was not there.
Keating rode up now, and the situation became more complicated. It ended with Bryce buying the horse for one hundred and twenty, to be paid when Wildfire was delivered safe and sound at the Batherley stables. Dunsey thought it might be smart to skip the day’s hunting, head straight to Batherley, and wait for Bryce to return, then hire a horse to carry him home with money in hand. But the urge for a run, fueled by his confidence and a shot of brandy from his pocket at the end of the deal, was hard to shake off, especially with a horse that would jump over fences impressively. However, Dunstan took one jump too many and got his horse hurt by a stake in the hedge. His own unattractive self, which was clearly not marketable, avoided injury, but poor Wildfire, unaware of his value, turned on his side and painfully breathed his last. Earlier, Dunstan had muttered several curses when he had to get down to adjust his stirrup, annoyed that this delay had pushed him to the back of the hunt just before the exciting moment, and in his frustration, he took the fences less carefully. He would have caught up with the hounds again when the unfortunate incident occurred; hence, he found himself amid eager riders ahead, not bothering about what happened behind them, and distant stragglers who were likely to stray far off from the path where Wildfire had fallen. Dunstan, who naturally cared more about immediate annoyances than long-term consequences, felt a sense of relief at the lack of witnesses to a situation that no amount of bragging could make envied as soon as he got back on his feet and realized it was all over for Wildfire. After his shock, he fortified himself with a little brandy and a lot of swearing, and walked as fast as he could towards a thicket on his right, thinking it would be a way to get to Batherley without running into any hunt members. His initial plan was to rent a horse there and ride home immediately, since walking many miles without a gun and along a regular road was as unthinkable for him as it was for many spirited young men like him. He wasn’t too worried about passing the bad news to Godfrey because he could also offer him Marner’s money as a solution; and if Godfrey protested, as he always did about the idea of taking on more debt from which he got the least benefit, Dunstan was confident he could pressure him into agreeing. The thought of Marner’s money grew more vivid as he faced the immediate need; the idea of showing up with muddy boots as a pedestrian at Batherley and facing the mocking questions from stablemen made it hard for him to be patient to return to Raveloe and put his lucky plan into action. A quick check of his waistcoat pocket reminded him that the few coins he felt there were too insignificant to settle that small debt. The stable-keeper had made it clear he wouldn’t do any more business with Dunsey Cass without the payment. When he considered the direction of the run, he realized he wasn’t much farther from home than from Batherley; but since Dunsey wasn’t known for being particularly sharp, he only came to this conclusion gradually as he realized there were other reasons for choosing the unusual option of walking home. It was nearly four o’clock now, and a mist was settling in: the sooner he got moving the better. He recalled having crossed the road and seen the finger-post shortly before Wildfire went down; so, buttoning his coat, twisting the end of his hunting whip neatly around the handle, and tapping the tops of his boots as if reassuring himself that he wasn’t at all taken aback, he set off feeling as though he was engaging in a remarkable physical feat that he could later embellish to impress a select group at the Rainbow. When a young man like Dunsey is forced into such an uncommon way of getting around as walking, having a whip in his hand is a useful way to combat the confusing sense of oddness in his situation; and as he walked through the encroaching mist, he kept tapping his whip against something. It was Godfrey’s whip, which he had chosen to take without permission because it had a gold handle; of course, no one could see that the name Godfrey Cass was engraved deeply on that gold handle when Dunstan held it—they could only see it was a very nice whip. Dunsey worried that he might run into an acquaintance who would see him looking pathetic, since mist isn’t a good cover when people are close to each other; but when he finally found himself in the familiar Raveloe lanes without encountering a single person, he quietly noted that this was part of his usual good luck. However, now the mist, combined with the evening darkness, was more of a hindrance than he wanted because it obscured the ruts he might slip into—hiding everything, so he had to feel his way by dragging his whip along the low bushes ahead of the hedgerow. He figured he must be getting close to the opening at the Stone-pits soon: he should discover it by the break in the hedgerow. Yet he realized it differently from what he expected—by some glimmers of light, which he guessed were coming from Silas Marner’s cottage. That cottage and the money hidden inside it had been on his mind the whole walk, and he’d been thinking of ways to trick and entice the weaver into sharing his money for the sake of earning interest. Dunstan felt like he needed to add a bit of intimidation to the flattery, since his own math was not clear enough to provide a solid argument about the benefits of interest; and regarding security, he vaguely thought of it as a means of deceiving someone into thinking they would actually get paid back. Overall, convincing the miser was a job that Godfrey would definitely pass on to his bolder and smarter brother: Dunstan had decided that, and by the time he saw the light shining through the cracks of Marner’s shutters, the idea of talking to the weaver had become so familiar to him that it felt completely natural to go introduce himself right then. There could be several advantages to this approach: the weaver might have a lantern, and Dunstan was tired of groping his way through the dark. He was still about three-quarters of a mile from home, and the lane was getting rather slippery since the mist was turning into rain. He climbed up the bank, slightly worried that he might take the wrong path, since he wasn’t sure whether the light was in front or at the side of the cottage. But he carefully felt the ground in front of him with the handle of his whip and eventually made it safely to the door. He knocked loudly, quite enjoying the idea of scaring the old man with the sudden noise. He heard no response; everything was silent in the cottage. Had the weaver gone to bed? If so, why was there still a light on? That seemed like a strange oversight for a miser. Dunstan knocked again more forcefully, and without waiting for an answer, shoved his fingers through the latch-hole, intending to shake the door and tug the latch-string up and down, sure that the door was locked. But to his surprise, with that double action, the door swung open, and he found himself facing a bright fire that illuminated every corner of the cottage—the bed, the loom, the three chairs, and the table—and showed him that Marner wasn’t there.
Nothing at that moment could be much more inviting to Dunsey than the bright fire on the brick hearth: he walked in and seated himself by it at once. There was something in front of the fire, too, that would have been inviting to a hungry man, if it had been in a different stage of cooking. It was a small bit of pork suspended from the kettle-hanger by a string passed through a large door-key, in a way known to primitive housekeepers unpossessed of jacks. But the pork had been hung at the farthest extremity of the hanger, apparently to prevent the roasting from proceeding too rapidly during the owner’s absence. The old staring simpleton had hot meat for his supper, then? thought Dunstan. People had always said he lived on mouldy bread, on purpose to check his appetite. But where could he be at this time, and on such an evening, leaving his supper in this stage of preparation, and his door unfastened? Dunstan’s own recent difficulty in making his way suggested to him that the weaver had perhaps gone outside his cottage to fetch in fuel, or for some such brief purpose, and had slipped into the Stone-pit. That was an interesting idea to Dunstan, carrying consequences of entire novelty. If the weaver was dead, who had a right to his money? Who would know where his money was hidden? Who would know that anybody had come to take it away? He went no farther into the subtleties of evidence: the pressing question, “Where is the money?” now took such entire possession of him as to make him quite forget that the weaver’s death was not a certainty. A dull mind, once arriving at an inference that flatters a desire, is rarely able to retain the impression that the notion from which the inference started was purely problematic. And Dunstan’s mind was as dull as the mind of a possible felon usually is. There were only three hiding-places where he had ever heard of cottagers’ hoards being found: the thatch, the bed, and a hole in the floor. Marner’s cottage had no thatch; and Dunstan’s first act, after a train of thought made rapid by the stimulus of cupidity, was to go up to the bed; but while he did so, his eyes travelled eagerly over the floor, where the bricks, distinct in the fire-light, were discernible under the sprinkling of sand. But not everywhere; for there was one spot, and one only, which was quite covered with sand, and sand showing the marks of fingers, which had apparently been careful to spread it over a given space. It was near the treddles of the loom. In an instant Dunstan darted to that spot, swept away the sand with his whip, and, inserting the thin end of the hook between the bricks, found that they were loose. In haste he lifted up two bricks, and saw what he had no doubt was the object of his search; for what could there be but money in those two leathern bags? And, from their weight, they must be filled with guineas. Dunstan felt round the hole, to be certain that it held no more; then hastily replaced the bricks, and spread the sand over them. Hardly more than five minutes had passed since he entered the cottage, but it seemed to Dunstan like a long while; and though he was without any distinct recognition of the possibility that Marner might be alive, and might re-enter the cottage at any moment, he felt an undefinable dread laying hold on him, as he rose to his feet with the bags in his hand. He would hasten out into the darkness, and then consider what he should do with the bags. He closed the door behind him immediately, that he might shut in the stream of light: a few steps would be enough to carry him beyond betrayal by the gleams from the shutter-chinks and the latch-hole. The rain and darkness had got thicker, and he was glad of it; though it was awkward walking with both hands filled, so that it was as much as he could do to grasp his whip along with one of the bags. But when he had gone a yard or two, he might take his time. So he stepped forward into the darkness.
Nothing at that moment could be more inviting to Dunsey than the bright fire on the brick hearth: he walked in and sat down beside it right away. There was something in front of the fire that would have been tempting for a hungry man if it had been cooked differently. It was a small piece of pork hanging from the kettle-hanger by a string passed through a large door key, a trick known to basic housekeepers without any fancy tools. But the pork was hung at the far end of the hanger, apparently to stop it from roasting too quickly while the owner was away. The old, simple man had hot meat for his supper, then? Dunstan thought. People had always said he lived on moldy bread to keep his appetite in check. But where could he be at this time, on a night like this, leaving his supper in this state of readiness, and his door unlocked? Dunstan’s recent trouble getting in suggested to him that the weaver had maybe stepped outside his cottage to gather some fuel or for some brief errand and had slipped into the Stone-pit. That idea intrigued Dunstan, carrying entirely new possibilities. If the weaver was dead, who would have a claim to his money? Who would know where his money was hidden? Who would know that anyone had come to take it away? He didn’t think any further into the complexities of evidence: the urgent question, “Where is the money?” took such hold of him that he completely forgot that the weaver’s death wasn’t certain. A dull mind, once convinced by a thought that caters to desire, rarely keeps in mind that the idea it started from was only a possibility. And Dunstan’s mind was as dull as one might expect from a potential criminal. There were only three places he had ever heard of where cottagers’ hidden stashes were found: the thatch, the bed, and a hole in the floor. Marner’s cottage had no thatch; and after his thoughts sped up due to greed, Dunstan’s first move was to go to the bed. But while doing so, his eyes eagerly scanned the floor, where the bricks, clear in the firelight, were visible under a sprinkle of sand. But not everywhere; there was one spot, and one only, that was completely covered in sand, and the sand showed the marks of fingers that had apparently been careful to spread it over a specific area. It was near the treadles of the loom. In an instant, Dunstan rushed to that spot, swept away the sand with his whip, and, slipping the thin end of the hook between the bricks, discovered that they were loose. Quickly, he lifted up two bricks and saw what he was convinced was what he was looking for; after all, what else could be in those two leather bags but money? And by their weight, they must be filled with guineas. Dunstan felt around the hole to make sure it didn’t contain anything else; then he hastily replaced the bricks and spread the sand over them again. It had hardly been more than five minutes since he entered the cottage, but it felt like a long time to Dunstan; and even though he didn’t distinctly realize the possibility that Marner might be alive and could return to the cottage at any moment, he felt an indescribable dread gripping him as he stood up with the bags in hand. He needed to hurry out into the darkness and then think about what to do with the bags. He immediately shut the door behind him to block the light: just a few steps would be enough to keep him from being seen by the flickers coming through the window cracks and the latch hole. The rain and darkness had thickened, and he was glad for it; though it was tricky walking with both hands full, making it tough to hold his whip along with one of the bags. But after he went a yard or two, he could take his time. So he stepped forward into the darkness.
CHAPTER V.
When Dunstan Cass turned his back on the cottage, Silas Marner was not more than a hundred yards away from it, plodding along from the village with a sack thrown round his shoulders as an overcoat, and with a horn lantern in his hand. His legs were weary, but his mind was at ease, free from the presentiment of change. The sense of security more frequently springs from habit than from conviction, and for this reason it often subsists after such a change in the conditions as might have been expected to suggest alarm. The lapse of time during which a given event has not happened, is, in this logic of habit, constantly alleged as a reason why the event should never happen, even when the lapse of time is precisely the added condition which makes the event imminent. A man will tell you that he has worked in a mine for forty years unhurt by an accident as a reason why he should apprehend no danger, though the roof is beginning to sink; and it is often observable, that the older a man gets, the more difficult it is to him to retain a believing conception of his own death. This influence of habit was necessarily strong in a man whose life was so monotonous as Marner’s—who saw no new people and heard of no new events to keep alive in him the idea of the unexpected and the changeful; and it explains simply enough, why his mind could be at ease, though he had left his house and his treasure more defenceless than usual. Silas was thinking with double complacency of his supper: first, because it would be hot and savoury; and secondly, because it would cost him nothing. For the little bit of pork was a present from that excellent housewife, Miss Priscilla Lammeter, to whom he had this day carried home a handsome piece of linen; and it was only on occasion of a present like this, that Silas indulged himself with roast-meat. Supper was his favourite meal, because it came at his time of revelry, when his heart warmed over his gold; whenever he had roast-meat, he always chose to have it for supper. But this evening, he had no sooner ingeniously knotted his string fast round his bit of pork, twisted the string according to rule over his door-key, passed it through the handle, and made it fast on the hanger, than he remembered that a piece of very fine twine was indispensable to his “setting up” a new piece of work in his loom early in the morning. It had slipped his memory, because, in coming from Mr. Lammeter’s, he had not had to pass through the village; but to lose time by going on errands in the morning was out of the question. It was a nasty fog to turn out into, but there were things Silas loved better than his own comfort; so, drawing his pork to the extremity of the hanger, and arming himself with his lantern and his old sack, he set out on what, in ordinary weather, would have been a twenty minutes’ errand. He could not have locked his door without undoing his well-knotted string and retarding his supper; it was not worth his while to make that sacrifice. What thief would find his way to the Stone-pits on such a night as this? and why should he come on this particular night, when he had never come through all the fifteen years before? These questions were not distinctly present in Silas’s mind; they merely serve to represent the vaguely-felt foundation of his freedom from anxiety.
When Dunstan Cass turned away from the cottage, Silas Marner was just a hundred yards down the road, trudging back from the village with a sack tossed over his shoulders like a coat and a horn lantern in his hand. His legs were tired, but his mind was relaxed, free from any sense of impending change. A feeling of safety often comes more from routine than from genuine belief, which is why it can persist even after a shift in circumstances that would usually cause worry. The amount of time that has passed without a specific event happening can, in this habit-driven reasoning, be used as a justification for believing the event will never occur—despite the fact that this very time period might actually be what makes the event likely to happen. People will tell you they’ve worked in a mine for forty years without an accident as a reason to think they're not in danger, even if the roof is starting to cave in; and it’s often noted that as a person ages, it becomes harder for them to genuinely believe in their own mortality. This influence of habit was particularly strong for someone like Marner, whose life was so routine—he never encountered new people or heard about new events to remind him of the unexpected and changeable nature of life. This helps explain why he could feel so at ease, even though he had left his home and treasure more vulnerable than usual. Silas was contentedly thinking about his supper: first, because it would be hot and tasty; and second, because it was essentially free. The small piece of pork was a gift from that wonderful housewife, Miss Priscilla Lammeter, to whom he had delivered a nice piece of linen that very day; it was only on occasions like this that Silas treated himself to roast meat. Supper was his favorite meal because it came at his time of celebration, when his heart would warm up over his gold; whenever he had roast meat, he always preferred to have it for supper. But that evening, as soon as he cleverly tied his string tightly around his piece of pork, twisted the string according to pattern over his door key, threaded it through the handle, and secured it on the hanger, he suddenly remembered that he needed a piece of fine twine for "setting up" a new task in his loom early the next morning. It had slipped his mind because he hadn't passed through the village on his way back from Mr. Lammeter’s; but taking the time to run errands in the morning was not an option. It was a dreary fog to step out into, but there were things Silas valued more than his own comfort; so, pulling his pork to the end of the hanger and grabbing his lantern and old sack, he set off on what would normally be a twenty-minute errand in good weather. He couldn’t lock his door without undoing his well-tied string and delaying his supper; it wasn’t worth that sacrifice. What thief would venture out to the Stone-pits on a night like this? And why would they pick this particular night when they hadn’t come by in all the fifteen years before? These questions weren’t clearly in Silas’s mind; they merely represented the faintly felt basis of his lack of worry.
He reached his door in much satisfaction that his errand was done: he opened it, and to his short-sighted eyes everything remained as he had left it, except that the fire sent out a welcome increase of heat. He trod about the floor while putting by his lantern and throwing aside his hat and sack, so as to merge the marks of Dunstan’s feet on the sand in the marks of his own nailed boots. Then he moved his pork nearer to the fire, and sat down to the agreeable business of tending the meat and warming himself at the same time.
He got to his door feeling quite pleased that his task was done. He opened it, and to his poor eyesight, everything looked just as he had left it, except the fire was giving off a nice boost of warmth. He walked around the floor while putting away his lantern and tossing aside his hat and bag, mixing Dunstan’s footprints in the sand with his own nailed boots. Then, he moved the pork closer to the fire and settled down to the enjoyable task of cooking the meat while warming himself at the same time.
Any one who had looked at him as the red light shone upon his pale face, strange straining eyes, and meagre form, would perhaps have understood the mixture of contemptuous pity, dread, and suspicion with which he was regarded by his neighbours in Raveloe. Yet few men could be more harmless than poor Marner. In his truthful simple soul, not even the growing greed and worship of gold could beget any vice directly injurious to others. The light of his faith quite put out, and his affections made desolate, he had clung with all the force of his nature to his work and his money; and like all objects to which a man devotes himself, they had fashioned him into correspondence with themselves. His loom, as he wrought in it without ceasing, had in its turn wrought on him, and confirmed more and more the monotonous craving for its monotonous response. His gold, as he hung over it and saw it grow, gathered his power of loving together into a hard isolation like its own.
Anyone who had seen him in the red light shining on his pale face, strange straining eyes, and meager form would probably have grasped the mix of contemptuous pity, dread, and suspicion with which his neighbors in Raveloe viewed him. Yet, few men could be more harmless than poor Marner. In his honest, simple soul, even the growing greed and worship of gold couldn’t create any vice that directly harmed others. With the light of his faith completely extinguished and his affections left desolate, he had clung fiercely to his work and his money. And like all things a man dedicates himself to, they had shaped him in their image. His loom, as he worked tirelessly at it, had in turn affected him, reinforcing the monotonous craving for its predictable response. His gold, as he leaned over it and watched it grow, pulled his capacity to love into a hard isolation, much like itself.
As soon as he was warm he began to think it would be a long while to wait till after supper before he drew out his guineas, and it would be pleasant to see them on the table before him as he ate his unwonted feast. For joy is the best of wine, and Silas’s guineas were a golden wine of that sort.
As soon as he felt warm, he started to think it would be a long wait until after dinner before he could take out his guineas, and it would be nice to see them on the table in front of him while he enjoyed his unusual feast. After all, joy is the best kind of wine, and Silas's guineas were a golden version of that.
He rose and placed his candle unsuspectingly on the floor near his loom, swept away the sand without noticing any change, and removed the bricks. The sight of the empty hole made his heart leap violently, but the belief that his gold was gone could not come at once—only terror, and the eager effort to put an end to the terror. He passed his trembling hand all about the hole, trying to think it possible that his eyes had deceived him; then he held the candle in the hole and examined it curiously, trembling more and more. At last he shook so violently that he let fall the candle, and lifted his hands to his head, trying to steady himself, that he might think. Had he put his gold somewhere else, by a sudden resolution last night, and then forgotten it? A man falling into dark waters seeks a momentary footing even on sliding stones; and Silas, by acting as if he believed in false hopes, warded off the moment of despair. He searched in every corner, he turned his bed over, and shook it, and kneaded it; he looked in his brick oven where he laid his sticks. When there was no other place to be searched, he kneeled down again and felt once more all round the hole. There was no untried refuge left for a moment’s shelter from the terrible truth.
He got up and placed his candle on the floor near his loom, absently sweeping away the sand without noticing anything different, and removed the bricks. The sight of the empty hole made his heart race, but the realization that his gold was gone didn’t hit him right away—only a sense of dread and the desperate urge to end that dread. He ran his trembling hand around the hole, trying to convince himself that his eyes were playing tricks on him; then he held the candle over the hole and examined it closely, shaking more with each passing moment. Finally, he shook so hard that he dropped the candle, putting his hands to his head to steady himself so he could think. Had he stashed his gold somewhere else last night in a spur-of-the-moment decision and then forgotten about it? A person falling into dark waters looks for even the slightest foothold on slippery stones; and Silas, by acting as if he still had hope, delayed the moment of despair. He searched every corner, flipped his bed over, shook it, and dug through it; he checked in his brick oven where he stored his sticks. When there seemed to be no other place left to look, he knelt down again and felt all around the hole. There was no untested refuge left for a moment’s escape from the awful reality.
Yes, there was a sort of refuge which always comes with the prostration of thought under an overpowering passion: it was that expectation of impossibilities, that belief in contradictory images, which is still distinct from madness, because it is capable of being dissipated by the external fact. Silas got up from his knees trembling, and looked round at the table: didn’t the gold lie there after all? The table was bare. Then he turned and looked behind him—looked all round his dwelling, seeming to strain his brown eyes after some possible appearance of the bags where he had already sought them in vain. He could see every object in his cottage—and his gold was not there.
Yes, there was a kind of refuge that comes when thoughts are overwhelmed by a powerful emotion: it was that hope for the impossible, that belief in contradictory images, which is still different from madness because it can be cleared away by external reality. Silas got up from his knees, shaking, and looked around at the table: wasn’t the gold there after all? The table was empty. Then he turned and looked behind him—looked all around his home, as if trying to force his brown eyes to find some trace of the bags he had already searched for in vain. He could see every object in his cottage—and his gold was not there.
Again he put his trembling hands to his head, and gave a wild ringing scream, the cry of desolation. For a few moments after, he stood motionless; but the cry had relieved him from the first maddening pressure of the truth. He turned, and tottered towards his loom, and got into the seat where he worked, instinctively seeking this as the strongest assurance of reality.
Again, he pressed his shaking hands to his head and let out a wild, piercing scream, a cry of despair. For a few moments afterward, he stood still; but the scream had freed him from the initial overwhelming weight of the truth. He turned and staggered toward his loom, slumping into the seat where he worked, instinctively seeking this as the strongest reminder of reality.
And now that all the false hopes had vanished, and the first shock of certainty was past, the idea of a thief began to present itself, and he entertained it eagerly, because a thief might be caught and made to restore the gold. The thought brought some new strength with it, and he started from his loom to the door. As he opened it the rain beat in upon him, for it was falling more and more heavily. There were no footsteps to be tracked on such a night—footsteps? When had the thief come? During Silas’s absence in the daytime the door had been locked, and there had been no marks of any inroad on his return by daylight. And in the evening, too, he said to himself, everything was the same as when he had left it. The sand and bricks looked as if they had not been moved. Was it a thief who had taken the bags? or was it a cruel power that no hands could reach, which had delighted in making him a second time desolate? He shrank from this vaguer dread, and fixed his mind with struggling effort on the robber with hands, who could be reached by hands. His thoughts glanced at all the neighbours who had made any remarks, or asked any questions which he might now regard as a ground of suspicion. There was Jem Rodney, a known poacher, and otherwise disreputable: he had often met Marner in his journeys across the fields, and had said something jestingly about the weaver’s money; nay, he had once irritated Marner, by lingering at the fire when he called to light his pipe, instead of going about his business. Jem Rodney was the man—there was ease in the thought. Jem could be found and made to restore the money: Marner did not want to punish him, but only to get back his gold which had gone from him, and left his soul like a forlorn traveller on an unknown desert. The robber must be laid hold of. Marner’s ideas of legal authority were confused, but he felt that he must go and proclaim his loss; and the great people in the village—the clergyman, the constable, and Squire Cass—would make Jem Rodney, or somebody else, deliver up the stolen money. He rushed out in the rain, under the stimulus of this hope, forgetting to cover his head, not caring to fasten his door; for he felt as if he had nothing left to lose. He ran swiftly, till want of breath compelled him to slacken his pace as he was entering the village at the turning close to the Rainbow.
And now that all the false hopes were gone and the initial shock of reality had passed, the idea of a thief started to take shape in his mind, and he welcomed it eagerly because a thief could be caught and made to return the gold. This thought gave him a bit of renewed strength, and he jumped up from his loom and headed for the door. As he opened it, the rain poured in on him, falling heavier and heavier. There were no footsteps to be found on a night like this—footsteps? When had the thief come? During Silas’s absence in the daytime, the door had been locked, and there were no signs of a break-in when he returned in the daylight. And even in the evening, he reminded himself, everything looked just the same as when he had left. The sand and bricks seemed untouched. Was it a thief who had taken the bags? Or was it some cruel force beyond his reach that had taken pleasure in making him desolate once more? He recoiled from this vague dread and focused his mind, with great effort, on the idea of a thief with hands, someone who could be caught. His thoughts drifted to all the neighbors who had said anything suspicious or asked questions that he could now see in a different light. There was Jem Rodney, a known poacher and generally unsavory character: he had often crossed paths with Marner in the fields, joking about the weaver’s money; in fact, he had once annoyed Marner by lingering at the fire when he called to light his pipe instead of getting on with his business. Jem Rodney was the culprit—there was a sense of relief in that idea. Jem could be found and made to return the money: Marner didn’t want to punish him, just to get back the gold that had left him feeling like a lost traveler in a barren desert. The thief had to be caught. Marner's understanding of legal authority was hazy, but he knew he had to report his loss; the important people in the village—the clergyman, the constable, and Squire Cass—would force Jem Rodney, or someone like him, to give back the stolen money. He dashed out into the rain, driven by this hope, forgetting to cover his head and not caring to lock his door, feeling as if he had nothing left to lose. He ran quickly until he was out of breath and had to slow down as he entered the village near the turning close to the Rainbow.
The Rainbow, in Marner’s view, was a place of luxurious resort for rich and stout husbands, whose wives had superfluous stores of linen; it was the place where he was likely to find the powers and dignities of Raveloe, and where he could most speedily make his loss public. He lifted the latch, and turned into the bright bar or kitchen on the right hand, where the less lofty customers of the house were in the habit of assembling, the parlour on the left being reserved for the more select society in which Squire Cass frequently enjoyed the double pleasure of conviviality and condescension. But the parlour was dark to-night, the chief personages who ornamented its circle being all at Mrs. Osgood’s birthday dance, as Godfrey Cass was. And in consequence of this, the party on the high-screened seats in the kitchen was more numerous than usual; several personages, who would otherwise have been admitted into the parlour and enlarged the opportunity of hectoring and condescension for their betters, being content this evening to vary their enjoyment by taking their spirits-and-water where they could themselves hector and condescend in company that called for beer.
The Rainbow, in Marner's opinion, was a fancy hangout for wealthy, hearty husbands whose wives had more linen than they knew what to do with; it was where he’d likely run into the prominent figures of Raveloe and where he could quickly make his loss known. He opened the latch and stepped into the bright bar or kitchen on the right, where the less distinguished customers often gathered, while the parlor on the left was reserved for the more exclusive crowd that Squire Cass frequently enjoyed mingling with. But tonight, the parlor was dark, as its usual attendees were all at Mrs. Osgood’s birthday dance, just like Godfrey Cass. As a result, the group in the high-backed seats in the kitchen was larger than usual; several individuals who would normally have been welcomed into the parlor and offered opportunities to show off to their social superiors were content this evening to change things up by having their drinks where they could also show off amongst a crowd that preferred beer.
CHAPTER VI.
The conversation, which was at a high pitch of animation when Silas approached the door of the Rainbow, had, as usual, been slow and intermittent when the company first assembled. The pipes began to be puffed in a silence which had an air of severity; the more important customers, who drank spirits and sat nearest the fire, staring at each other as if a bet were depending on the first man who winked; while the beer-drinkers, chiefly men in fustian jackets and smock-frocks, kept their eyelids down and rubbed their hands across their mouths, as if their draughts of beer were a funereal duty attended with embarrassing sadness. At last Mr. Snell, the landlord, a man of a neutral disposition, accustomed to stand aloof from human differences as those of beings who were all alike in need of liquor, broke silence, by saying in a doubtful tone to his cousin the butcher—
The conversation, which was lively when Silas walked up to the Rainbow's door, had, as usual, started off slow and sporadic when everyone first gathered. People began to smoke in a silence that felt tense; the more important patrons, who were drinking hard liquor and sitting closest to the fire, stared at each other as if it were a competition to see who would blink first. Meanwhile, the beer drinkers, mostly men in worn jackets and work clothes, kept their eyes down and rubbed their hands over their mouths, as if drinking their beers was a somber task they had to do. Finally, Mr. Snell, the landlord, a man who was generally indifferent and kept to himself regarding people's differences because everyone needed drinks, broke the silence by speaking in a hesitant tone to his cousin, the butcher—
“Some folks ’ud say that was a fine beast you druv in yesterday, Bob?”
“Some people would say that was a nice animal you drove in yesterday, Bob?”
The butcher, a jolly, smiling, red-haired man, was not disposed to answer rashly. He gave a few puffs before he spat and replied, “And they wouldn’t be fur wrong, John.”
The butcher, a cheerful, smiling, red-haired guy, wasn't inclined to respond impulsively. He took a few puffs before he spat and said, “And they wouldn’t be far wrong, John.”
After this feeble delusive thaw, the silence set in as severely as before.
After this weak, misleading thaw, the silence returned just as strongly as before.
“Was it a red Durham?” said the farrier, taking up the thread of discourse after the lapse of a few minutes.
“Was it a red Durham?” the farrier asked, picking up the conversation after a few minutes had passed.
The farrier looked at the landlord, and the landlord looked at the butcher, as the person who must take the responsibility of answering.
The farrier glanced at the landlord, and the landlord looked at the butcher, as the one who had to take on the responsibility of answering.
“Red it was,” said the butcher, in his good-humoured husky treble—“and a Durham it was.”
“Red it was,” said the butcher, in his cheerful, husky voice—“and it was a Durham.”
“Then you needn’t tell me who you bought it of,” said the farrier, looking round with some triumph; “I know who it is has got the red Durhams o’ this country-side. And she’d a white star on her brow, I’ll bet a penny?” The farrier leaned forward with his hands on his knees as he put this question, and his eyes twinkled knowingly.
“Then you don’t need to tell me who you got it from,” said the farrier, looking around with a bit of pride; “I know who has the red Durhams in this area. And I’ll bet a penny she had a white star on her forehead?” The farrier leaned forward with his hands on his knees as he asked this, and his eyes sparkled with knowledge.
“Well; yes—she might,” said the butcher, slowly, considering that he was giving a decided affirmative. “I don’t say contrairy.”
“Well, yes—she might,” said the butcher, slowly, realizing he was definitely agreeing. “I’m not saying the opposite.”
“I knew that very well,” said the farrier, throwing himself backward again, and speaking defiantly; “if I don’t know Mr. Lammeter’s cows, I should like to know who does—that’s all. And as for the cow you’ve bought, bargain or no bargain, I’ve been at the drenching of her—contradick me who will.”
“I know that very well,” said the farrier, leaning back again and speaking defiantly; “if I don’t know Mr. Lammeter’s cows, I’d like to know who does—that’s all. And as for the cow you’ve bought, whether it was a good deal or not, I’ve been the one to give her the treatment—challenge me if you want.”
The farrier looked fierce, and the mild butcher’s conversational spirit was roused a little.
The blacksmith looked intimidating, and the usually calm butcher's conversational demeanor was stirred up a bit.
“I’m not for contradicking no man,” he said; “I’m for peace and quietness. Some are for cutting long ribs—I’m for cutting ’em short myself; but I don’t quarrel with ’em. All I say is, it’s a lovely carkiss—and anybody as was reasonable, it ’ud bring tears into their eyes to look at it.”
“I’m not about to argue with anyone,” he said. “I’m all for peace and quiet. Some people like to make a big deal out of things—I prefer to keep it simple; but I don’t fight with them. All I’m saying is, it’s a beautiful corpse—and anyone who has any sense would be moved to tears just looking at it.”
“Well, it’s the cow as I drenched, whatever it is,” pursued the farrier, angrily; “and it was Mr. Lammeter’s cow, else you told a lie when you said it was a red Durham.”
“Well, it’s the cow I soaked, whatever it is,” the farrier continued angrily; “and it was Mr. Lammeter’s cow, or you lied when you said it was a red Durham.”
“I tell no lies,” said the butcher, with the same mild huskiness as before, “and I contradick none—not if a man was to swear himself black: he’s no meat o’ mine, nor none o’ my bargains. All I say is, it’s a lovely carkiss. And what I say, I’ll stick to; but I’ll quarrel wi’ no man.”
“I’m not lying,” said the butcher, with the same soft rasp as before, “and I’m not contradicting anyone—not even if a man swears he’s telling the truth: he’s not part of my business or my deals. All I’m saying is, it’s a beautiful carcass. And what I say, I’ll stand by; but I won’t fight with anyone.”
“No,” said the farrier, with bitter sarcasm, looking at the company generally; “and p’rhaps you aren’t pig-headed; and p’rhaps you didn’t say the cow was a red Durham; and p’rhaps you didn’t say she’d got a star on her brow—stick to that, now you’re at it.”
“No,” said the farrier, with sharp sarcasm, glancing at the group in general; “and maybe you’re not stubborn; and maybe you didn't claim the cow was a red Durham; and maybe you didn't say she had a star on her forehead—keep that up since you’re at it.”
“Come, come,” said the landlord; “let the cow alone. The truth lies atween you: you’re both right and both wrong, as I allays say. And as for the cow’s being Mr. Lammeter’s, I say nothing to that; but this I say, as the Rainbow’s the Rainbow. And for the matter o’ that, if the talk is to be o’ the Lammeters, you know the most upo’ that head, eh, Mr. Macey? You remember when first Mr. Lammeter’s father come into these parts, and took the Warrens?”
“Come on,” said the landlord; “leave the cow alone. The truth is somewhere in between: you’re both right and both wrong, as I always say. And as for the cow belonging to Mr. Lammeter, I won’t comment on that; but I’ll say this, as sure as the Rainbow is the Rainbow. And speaking of that, if we’re going to talk about the Lammeters, you know the most about it, right, Mr. Macey? Do you remember when Mr. Lammeter’s father first came to this area and acquired the Warrens?”
Mr. Macey, tailor and parish-clerk, the latter of which functions rheumatism had of late obliged him to share with a small-featured young man who sat opposite him, held his white head on one side, and twirled his thumbs with an air of complacency, slightly seasoned with criticism. He smiled pityingly, in answer to the landlord’s appeal, and said—
Mr. Macey, the tailor and parish clerk, who had recently been forced by rheumatism to share his duties with a young man with small features sitting opposite him, tilted his white head to one side and twirled his thumbs with a mix of satisfaction and mild criticism. He smiled sympathetically in response to the landlord's request and said—
“Aye, aye; I know, I know; but I let other folks talk. I’ve laid by now, and gev up to the young uns. Ask them as have been to school at Tarley: they’ve learnt pernouncing; that’s come up since my day.”
“Yeah, yeah; I get it, I get it; but I let other people talk. I’ve saved my thoughts now and passed them on to the younger ones. Ask those who’ve gone to school at Tarley: they’ve learned how to pronounce things; that’s something new since my time.”
“If you’re pointing at me, Mr. Macey,” said the deputy clerk, with an air of anxious propriety, “I’m nowise a man to speak out of my place. As the psalm says—
“If you’re pointing at me, Mr. Macey,” said the deputy clerk, with a sense of nervous decorum, “I’m definitely not someone who speaks out of turn. As the psalm says—
‘I know what’s right, nor only so,
But also practise what I know.’
‘I know what’s right, not just that,
But I also practice what I know.’
“Well, then, I wish you’d keep hold o’ the tune, when it’s set for you; if you’re for practising, I wish you’d practise that,” said a large jocose-looking man, an excellent wheelwright in his week-day capacity, but on Sundays leader of the choir. He winked, as he spoke, at two of the company, who were known officially as the “bassoon” and the “key-bugle,” in the confidence that he was expressing the sense of the musical profession in Raveloe.
"Well, I wish you'd hold on to the tune when it's set for you; if you’re going to practice, I wish you’d practice that," said a large, cheerful-looking man, an excellent wheelwright during the week but leader of the choir on Sundays. He winked as he spoke at two members of the group, who were officially known as the "bassoon" and the "key-bugle," confident that he was voicing the opinion of the musical community in Raveloe.
Mr. Tookey, the deputy-clerk, who shared the unpopularity common to deputies, turned very red, but replied, with careful moderation—“Mr. Winthrop, if you’ll bring me any proof as I’m in the wrong, I’m not the man to say I won’t alter. But there’s people set up their own ears for a standard, and expect the whole choir to follow ’em. There may be two opinions, I hope.”
Mr. Tookey, the assistant clerk, who shared the unpopularity common among deputies, turned very red but replied with careful calmness, “Mr. Winthrop, if you can show me any evidence that I’m wrong, I’m not one to refuse to change my mind. But there are people who set their own standards and expect everyone else to follow them. I hope there can be two opinions.”
“Aye, aye,” said Mr. Macey, who felt very well satisfied with this attack on youthful presumption; “you’re right there, Tookey: there’s allays two ’pinions; there’s the ’pinion a man has of himsen, and there’s the ’pinion other folks have on him. There’d be two ’pinions about a cracked bell, if the bell could hear itself.”
“Yeah, yeah,” said Mr. Macey, who felt quite pleased with this criticism of youthful arrogance; “you've got a point there, Tookey: there are always two opinions; there’s the opinion a person has of themselves, and there’s the opinion others have of them. There would be two opinions about a cracked bell if the bell could hear itself.”
“Well, Mr. Macey,” said poor Tookey, serious amidst the general laughter, “I undertook to partially fill up the office of parish-clerk by Mr. Crackenthorp’s desire, whenever your infirmities should make you unfitting; and it’s one of the rights thereof to sing in the choir—else why have you done the same yourself?”
“Well, Mr. Macey,” said poor Tookey, serious amidst the general laughter, “I agreed to somewhat take on the role of parish clerk at Mr. Crackenthorp’s request, whenever your health issues made you unable to do it; and one of the privileges is to sing in the choir—otherwise, why have you done it yourself?”
“Ah! but the old gentleman and you are two folks,” said Ben Winthrop. “The old gentleman’s got a gift. Why, the Squire used to invite him to take a glass, only to hear him sing the ‘Red Rovier’; didn’t he, Mr. Macey? It’s a nat’ral gift. There’s my little lad Aaron, he’s got a gift—he can sing a tune off straight, like a throstle. But as for you, Master Tookey, you’d better stick to your ‘Amens’: your voice is well enough when you keep it up in your nose. It’s your inside as isn’t right made for music: it’s no better nor a hollow stalk.”
“Ah! But you and the old gentleman are two different people,” said Ben Winthrop. “The old gentleman has a talent. The Squire used to invite him for a drink just to hear him sing ‘Red Rovier’; didn’t he, Mr. Macey? It’s a natural gift. My little boy Aaron has a talent—he can sing a tune perfectly, like a thrush. But as for you, Master Tookey, you’re better off with your ‘Amens’: your voice is okay when you keep it up in your nose. It’s your insides that aren’t made for music; they're no better than an empty stalk.”
This kind of unflinching frankness was the most piquant form of joke to the company at the Rainbow, and Ben Winthrop’s insult was felt by everybody to have capped Mr. Macey’s epigram.
This kind of straightforward honesty was the most amusing type of joke for the group at the Rainbow, and everyone felt that Ben Winthrop's insult perfectly topped Mr. Macey's clever remark.
“I see what it is plain enough,” said Mr. Tookey, unable to keep cool any longer. “There’s a consperacy to turn me out o’ the choir, as I shouldn’t share the Christmas money—that’s where it is. But I shall speak to Mr. Crackenthorp; I’ll not be put upon by no man.”
"I see what's going on clearly," said Mr. Tookey, losing his composure. "There’s a conspiracy to kick me out of the choir, just because I shouldn’t get a share of the Christmas money—that’s what's happening. But I'm going to talk to Mr. Crackenthorp; I won’t let any man push me around."
“Nay, nay, Tookey,” said Ben Winthrop. “We’ll pay you your share to keep out of it—that’s what we’ll do. There’s things folks ’ud pay to be rid on, besides varmin.”
“Nah, nah, Tookey,” said Ben Winthrop. “We’ll pay you your share to stay out of it—that’s what we’ll do. There are things people would pay to be rid of, besides pests.”
“Come, come,” said the landlord, who felt that paying people for their absence was a principle dangerous to society; “a joke’s a joke. We’re all good friends here, I hope. We must give and take. You’re both right and you’re both wrong, as I say. I agree wi’ Mr. Macey here, as there’s two opinions; and if mine was asked, I should say they’re both right. Tookey’s right and Winthrop’s right, and they’ve only got to split the difference and make themselves even.”
“Come on, come on,” said the landlord, who believed that paying people for not showing up was a risky principle for society; “a joke is a joke. I hope we're all good friends here. We need to give and take. You’re both right and wrong, as I see it. I agree with Mr. Macey here that there are two sides to every story; if you asked me, I'd say they're both right. Tookey’s right and Winthrop’s right, and they just need to meet in the middle and settle things.”
The farrier was puffing his pipe rather fiercely, in some contempt at this trivial discussion. He had no ear for music himself, and never went to church, as being of the medical profession, and likely to be in requisition for delicate cows. But the butcher, having music in his soul, had listened with a divided desire for Tookey’s defeat and for the preservation of the peace.
The farrier was smoking his pipe pretty aggressively, looking down on this silly conversation. He didn’t have an ear for music and never attended church, being part of the medical field and often needed for delicate cows. But the butcher, who had music in his soul, felt torn between wanting Tookey to lose and wanting to keep the peace.
“To be sure,” he said, following up the landlord’s conciliatory view, “we’re fond of our old clerk; it’s nat’ral, and him used to be such a singer, and got a brother as is known for the first fiddler in this country-side. Eh, it’s a pity but what Solomon lived in our village, and could give us a tune when we liked; eh, Mr. Macey? I’d keep him in liver and lights for nothing—that I would.”
“To be sure,” he said, agreeing with the landlord’s friendly opinion, “we really like our old clerk; it’s natural, especially since he used to be such a great singer, and he has a brother who is known as the best fiddler in this area. It’s a shame Solomon doesn’t live in our village anymore; he could play us a tune whenever we wanted; right, Mr. Macey? I’d support him for free—that’s for sure.”
“Aye, aye,” said Mr. Macey, in the height of complacency; “our family’s been known for musicianers as far back as anybody can tell. But them things are dying out, as I tell Solomon every time he comes round; there’s no voices like what there used to be, and there’s nobody remembers what we remember, if it isn’t the old crows.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Mr. Macey said, feeling pretty pleased with himself; “our family has been known for musicians for as long as anyone can remember. But those days are fading, as I tell Solomon every time he stops by; there aren’t any voices like there used to be, and no one remembers what we remember, unless it’s the old crows.”
“Aye, you remember when first Mr. Lammeter’s father come into these parts, don’t you, Mr. Macey?” said the landlord.
“Aye, you remember when Mr. Lammeter’s father first came to this area, don’t you, Mr. Macey?” said the landlord.
“I should think I did,” said the old man, who had now gone through that complimentary process necessary to bring him up to the point of narration; “and a fine old gentleman he was—as fine, and finer nor the Mr. Lammeter as now is. He came from a bit north’ard, so far as I could ever make out. But there’s nobody rightly knows about those parts: only it couldn’t be far north’ard, nor much different from this country, for he brought a fine breed o’ sheep with him, so there must be pastures there, and everything reasonable. We heared tell as he’d sold his own land to come and take the Warrens, and that seemed odd for a man as had land of his own, to come and rent a farm in a strange place. But they said it was along of his wife’s dying; though there’s reasons in things as nobody knows on—that’s pretty much what I’ve made out; yet some folks are so wise, they’ll find you fifty reasons straight off, and all the while the real reason’s winking at ’em in the corner, and they niver see’t. Howsomever, it was soon seen as we’d got a new parish’ner as know’d the rights and customs o’ things, and kep a good house, and was well looked on by everybody. And the young man—that’s the Mr. Lammeter as now is, for he’d niver a sister—soon begun to court Miss Osgood, that’s the sister o’ the Mr. Osgood as now is, and a fine handsome lass she was—eh, you can’t think—they pretend this young lass is like her, but that’s the way wi’ people as don’t know what come before ’em. I should know, for I helped the old rector, Mr. Drumlow as was, I helped him marry ’em.”
“I think I did,” said the old man, who had now gone through the polite process necessary to get to the storytelling part; “and he was a fine old gentleman—better than Mr. Lammeter, who is here now. He came from a bit further north, as far as I could ever figure out. But no one really knows much about those areas; it couldn’t be too far north or too different from this place, since he brought a great breed of sheep with him, so there must be good pastures and everything needed. We heard he sold his own land to come and take the Warrens, which seemed strange for someone who owned land to come and rent a farm in an unfamiliar place. But they said it was because of his wife passing away; though there are reasons in things that nobody understands—that’s pretty much what I’ve gathered; yet some folks are so clever, they’ll come up with fifty reasons right away, while the real reason just sits there in the corner, and they never see it. Anyway, it didn’t take long to see that we had a new parishioner who knew the rights and customs of things, kept a good house, and was well-liked by everyone. And the young man—that’s Mr. Lammeter now, since he never had a sister—soon started courting Miss Osgood, who’s the sister of Mr. Osgood today, and she was a stunning young lady—oh, you can’t imagine—they claim this young lady is like her, but that’s how it goes with people who don’t know the past. I should know, since I helped the old rector, Mr. Drumlow, marry them.”
Here Mr. Macey paused; he always gave his narrative in instalments, expecting to be questioned according to precedent.
Here Mr. Macey paused; he always shared his story in parts, expecting to be asked questions like usual.
“Aye, and a partic’lar thing happened, didn’t it, Mr. Macey, so as you were likely to remember that marriage?” said the landlord, in a congratulatory tone.
“Yeah, and a particular thing happened, didn’t it, Mr. Macey, so you were probably going to remember that marriage?” said the landlord, in a congratulatory tone.
“I should think there did—a very partic’lar thing,” said Mr. Macey, nodding sideways. “For Mr. Drumlow—poor old gentleman, I was fond on him, though he’d got a bit confused in his head, what wi’ age and wi’ taking a drop o’ summat warm when the service come of a cold morning. And young Mr. Lammeter, he’d have no way but he must be married in Janiwary, which, to be sure, ’s a unreasonable time to be married in, for it isn’t like a christening or a burying, as you can’t help; and so Mr. Drumlow—poor old gentleman, I was fond on him—but when he come to put the questions, he put ’em by the rule o’ contrairy, like, and he says, ‘Wilt thou have this man to thy wedded wife?’says he, and then he says, ‘Wilt thou have this woman to thy wedded husband?’ says he. But the partic’larest thing of all is, as nobody took any notice on it but me, and they answered straight off ‘yes,’ like as if it had been me saying ‘Amen’ i’ the right place, without listening to what went before.”
“I think there was— a very specific thing,” said Mr. Macey, nodding sideways. “For Mr. Drumlow—poor old gentleman, I liked him, even though he got a little confused in his head from age and from having a drink or two when the service happened on a cold morning. And young Mr. Lammeter insisted he had to get married in January, which, of course, is an unreasonable time to marry, since it’s not like a christening or a burial that you can't avoid; so Mr. Drumlow—poor old gentleman, I liked him—when he got to the questions, he asked them backward, and he says, ‘Will you have this man as your wedded wife?’ and then he says, ‘Will you have this woman as your wedded husband?’ But the strangest thing of all is that nobody noticed except me, and they answered right away ‘yes,’ just like I would when saying ‘Amen’ at the right moment, without listening to what came before.”
“But you knew what was going on well enough, didn’t you, Mr. Macey? You were live enough, eh?” said the butcher.
“But you knew what was happening, didn’t you, Mr. Macey? You were aware enough, right?” said the butcher.
“Lor bless you!” said Mr. Macey, pausing, and smiling in pity at the impotence of his hearer’s imagination—“why, I was all of a tremble: it was as if I’d been a coat pulled by the two tails, like; for I couldn’t stop the parson, I couldn’t take upon me to do that; and yet I said to myself, I says, ‘Suppose they shouldn’t be fast married, ’cause the words are contrairy?’ and my head went working like a mill, for I was allays uncommon for turning things over and seeing all round ’em; and I says to myself, ‘Is’t the meanin’ or the words as makes folks fast i’ wedlock?’ For the parson meant right, and the bride and bridegroom meant right. But then, when I come to think on it, meanin’ goes but a little way i’ most things, for you may mean to stick things together and your glue may be bad, and then where are you? And so I says to mysen, ‘It isn’t the meanin,’ it’s the glue.’ And I was worreted as if I’d got three bells to pull at once, when we went into the vestry, and they begun to sign their names. But where’s the use o’ talking?—you can’t think what goes on in a ’cute man’s inside.”
“Goodness gracious!” said Mr. Macey, pausing and smiling pityingly at his listener’s lack of imagination—“I was all shaken up: it felt like I was a coat being pulled by both sides; I couldn’t stop the parson, I couldn’t take that on myself; and yet I thought to myself, 'What if they aren’t actually married because the words are different?' and my mind was racing like crazy, because I’ve always been good at flipping things over and seeing all sides of them; and I thought, 'Is it the meaning or the words that really tie people together in marriage?' Because the parson meant well, and the bride and groom meant well. But then, when I really considered it, meaning doesn’t go very far in most things, because you might intend to stick things together but if your glue is terrible, then what do you have? So I told myself, 'It’s not the meaning; it’s the glue.' And I was worried like I had three bells to pull at once when we went into the vestry, and they started to sign their names. But what’s the point of talking? —you can’t imagine what goes on inside a clever man’s head.”
“But you held in for all that, didn’t you, Mr. Macey?” said the landlord.
“But you managed to hang in there through all that, didn’t you, Mr. Macey?” said the landlord.
“Aye, I held in tight till I was by mysen wi’ Mr. Drumlow, and then I out wi’ everything, but respectful, as I allays did. And he made light on it, and he says, ‘Pooh, pooh, Macey, make yourself easy,’ he says; ‘it’s neither the meaning nor the words—it’s the regester does it—that’s the glue.’ So you see he settled it easy; for parsons and doctors know everything by heart, like, so as they aren’t worreted wi’ thinking what’s the rights and wrongs o’ things, as I’n been many and many’s the time. And sure enough the wedding turned out all right, on’y poor Mrs. Lammeter—that’s Miss Osgood as was—died afore the lasses was growed up; but for prosperity and everything respectable, there’s no family more looked on.”
“Yeah, I held it together until I was alone with Mr. Drumlow, and then I let it all out, but respectfully, as I always did. He brushed it off and said, ‘Oh, come on, Macey, just relax,’ he said; ‘it’s not the meaning or the words—it’s the register that matters—that’s the glue.’ So you see, he made it sound easy; because priests and doctors have everything memorized, so they aren’t troubled with figuring out what’s right and wrong like I have been many times. And sure enough, the wedding went smoothly, only poor Mrs. Lammeter—that’s Miss Osgood, by the way—died before the girls grew up; but for success and everything respectable, there’s no family more esteemed.”
Every one of Mr. Macey’s audience had heard this story many times, but it was listened to as if it had been a favourite tune, and at certain points the puffing of the pipes was momentarily suspended, that the listeners might give their whole minds to the expected words. But there was more to come; and Mr. Snell, the landlord, duly put the leading question.
Every one of Mr. Macey's audience had heard this story many times, but they listened as if it were a favorite song, and at certain points, the puffing of the pipes briefly stopped so the listeners could fully focus on the anticipated words. But there was more to come; and Mr. Snell, the landlord, appropriately asked the crucial question.
“Why, old Mr. Lammeter had a pretty fortin, didn’t they say, when he come into these parts?”
“Why, didn’t they say old Mr. Lammeter had quite a fortune when he came to this area?”
“Well, yes,” said Mr. Macey; “but I daresay it’s as much as this Mr. Lammeter’s done to keep it whole. For there was allays a talk as nobody could get rich on the Warrens: though he holds it cheap, for it’s what they call Charity Land.”
“Well, yes,” said Mr. Macey; “but I guess it’s just as much as this Mr. Lammeter has done to keep it intact. There’s always been talk that nobody could get rich off the Warrens: though he doesn’t value it much, since it’s what they call Charity Land.”
“Aye, and there’s few folks know so well as you how it come to be Charity Land, eh, Mr. Macey?” said the butcher.
“Yeah, and there are few people who know as well as you how it became Charity Land, right, Mr. Macey?” said the butcher.
“How should they?” said the old clerk, with some contempt. “Why, my grandfather made the grooms’ livery for that Mr. Cliff as came and built the big stables at the Warrens. Why, they’re stables four times as big as Squire Cass’s, for he thought o’ nothing but hosses and hunting, Cliff didn’t—a Lunnon tailor, some folks said, as had gone mad wi’ cheating. For he couldn’t ride; lor bless you! they said he’d got no more grip o’ the hoss than if his legs had been cross-sticks: my grandfather heared old Squire Cass say so many and many a time. But ride he would, as if Old Harry had been a-driving him; and he’d a son, a lad o’ sixteen; and nothing would his father have him do, but he must ride and ride—though the lad was frighted, they said. And it was a common saying as the father wanted to ride the tailor out o’ the lad, and make a gentleman on him—not but what I’m a tailor myself, but in respect as God made me such, I’m proud on it, for ‘Macey, tailor,’ ’s been wrote up over our door since afore the Queen’s heads went out on the shillings. But Cliff, he was ashamed o’ being called a tailor, and he was sore vexed as his riding was laughed at, and nobody o’ the gentlefolks hereabout could abide him. Howsomever, the poor lad got sickly and died, and the father didn’t live long after him, for he got queerer nor ever, and they said he used to go out i’ the dead o’ the night, wi’ a lantern in his hand, to the stables, and set a lot o’ lights burning, for he got as he couldn’t sleep; and there he’d stand, cracking his whip and looking at his hosses; and they said it was a mercy as the stables didn’t get burnt down wi’ the poor dumb creaturs in ’em. But at last he died raving, and they found as he’d left all his property, Warrens and all, to a Lunnon Charity, and that’s how the Warrens come to be Charity Land; though, as for the stables, Mr. Lammeter never uses ’em—they’re out o’ all charicter—lor bless you! if you was to set the doors a-banging in ’em, it ’ud sound like thunder half o’er the parish.”
“How should they?” said the old clerk, with some disdain. “Well, my grandfather made the grooms’ uniforms for that Mr. Cliff who came and built the big stables at the Warrens. They’re stables four times the size of Squire Cass’s, since all he cared about was horses and hunting; Cliff didn’t—some folks said he was a London tailor who went mad from cheating. He couldn’t ride; I swear! they said he had no more grip on the horse than if his legs were made of sticks: my grandfather heard old Squire Cass say that many times. But he would ride, as if Old Harry was driving him; and he had a son, a boy of sixteen; and his father insisted he must ride and ride—even though the boy was terrified, they said. It was commonly said the father wanted to ride the tailor out of him and make a gentleman of him—not that I’m a tailor myself, but as God made me one, I’m proud of it, for ‘Macey, tailor,’ has been written above our door since before the Queen’s heads were taken off the shillings. But Cliff was ashamed of being called a tailor, and he was very upset that his riding was laughed at, and none of the gentlemen around here could stand him. Anyway, the poor boy got sick and died, and his father didn’t live long after him, as he became even weirder, and they said he would go out in the dead of night, with a lantern in hand, to the stables, and light a bunch of candles, since he couldn’t sleep; and there he’d stand, cracking his whip and looking at his horses; and they said it was a miracle the stables didn’t burn down with the poor dumb creatures in them. But eventually he died raving, and they found he had left all his property, including the Warrens, to a London charity, and that’s how the Warrens came to be Charity Land; though, as for the stables, Mr. Lammeter never uses them—they’re totally out of character—goodness! if you were to bang the doors in them, it would sound like thunder all over the parish.”
“Aye, but there’s more going on in the stables than what folks see by daylight, eh, Mr. Macey?” said the landlord.
“Yeah, but there’s more happening in the stables than what people see in the daylight, right, Mr. Macey?” said the landlord.
“Aye, aye; go that way of a dark night, that’s all,” said Mr. Macey, winking mysteriously, “and then make believe, if you like, as you didn’t see lights i’ the stables, nor hear the stamping o’ the hosses, nor the cracking o’ the whips, and howling, too, if it’s tow’rt daybreak. ‘Cliff’s Holiday’ has been the name of it ever sin’ I were a boy; that’s to say, some said as it was the holiday Old Harry gev him from roasting, like. That’s what my father told me, and he was a reasonable man, though there’s folks nowadays know what happened afore they were born better nor they know their own business.”
“Yeah, yeah; just go that way on a dark night, that’s all,” Mr. Macey said, winking mysteriously. “Then pretend, if you want, that you didn’t see lights in the stables, or hear the horses stamping, or the whips cracking, and the howling too, if it’s close to dawn. ‘Cliff’s Holiday’ is what it’s been called ever since I was a boy; some say it was the holiday Old Harry gave him for not being roasted, basically. That’s what my dad told me, and he was a reasonable guy, even though there are people nowadays who know what happened before they were born better than they know their own business.”
“What do you say to that, eh, Dowlas?” said the landlord, turning to the farrier, who was swelling with impatience for his cue. “There’s a nut for you to crack.”
“What do you think about that, huh, Dowlas?” said the landlord, turning to the farrier, who was bursting with impatience for his turn. “There’s a problem for you to solve.”
Mr. Dowlas was the negative spirit in the company, and was proud of his position.
Mr. Dowlas was the pessimistic presence in the group and took pride in his role.
“Say? I say what a man should say as doesn’t shut his eyes to look at a finger-post. I say, as I’m ready to wager any man ten pound, if he’ll stand out wi’ me any dry night in the pasture before the Warren stables, as we shall neither see lights nor hear noises, if it isn’t the blowing of our own noses. That’s what I say, and I’ve said it many a time; but there’s nobody ’ull ventur a ten-pun’ note on their ghos’es as they make so sure of.”
"Say? I say what a man should say—one who doesn’t ignore the obvious. I’d bet any man ten pounds that if he stands out with me on a dry night in the pasture by the Warren stables, we won’t see any lights or hear any sounds, except for the blowing of our own noses. That’s what I say, and I’ve said it many times before; but no one dares to risk a ten-pound note on the ghosts they’re so certain about."
“Why, Dowlas, that’s easy betting, that is,” said Ben Winthrop. “You might as well bet a man as he wouldn’t catch the rheumatise if he stood up to ’s neck in the pool of a frosty night. It ’ud be fine fun for a man to win his bet as he’d catch the rheumatise. Folks as believe in Cliff’s Holiday aren’t agoing to ventur near it for a matter o’ ten pound.”
“Come on, Dowlas, that’s an easy bet,” said Ben Winthrop. “You might as well bet someone that they won’t catch a cold if they stand neck-deep in a pool on a frosty night. It would be hilarious for someone to win a bet while getting sick. People who believe in Cliff’s Holiday aren’t going to risk going near it for just ten pounds.”
“If Master Dowlas wants to know the truth on it,” said Mr. Macey, with a sarcastic smile, tapping his thumbs together, “he’s no call to lay any bet—let him go and stan’ by himself—there’s nobody ’ull hinder him; and then he can let the parish’ners know if they’re wrong.”
“If Master Dowlas wants to know the truth about it,” said Mr. Macey, with a sarcastic smile, tapping his thumbs together, “he doesn’t need to place a bet—he can just stand by himself—nobody will stop him; and then he can let the parishioners know if they’re wrong.”
“Thank you! I’m obliged to you,” said the farrier, with a snort of scorn. “If folks are fools, it’s no business o’ mine. I don’t want to make out the truth about ghos’es: I know it a’ready. But I’m not against a bet—everything fair and open. Let any man bet me ten pound as I shall see Cliff’s Holiday, and I’ll go and stand by myself. I want no company. I’d as lief do it as I’d fill this pipe.”
“Thanks! I appreciate it,” said the farrier, with a scoff. “If people are naive, that’s not my concern. I already know the truth about ghosts. But I’m up for a bet—everything fair and square. Let any man bet me ten pounds that I’ll see Cliff’s Holiday, and I’ll go stand by myself. I don’t need any company. I’d just as soon do it as fill this pipe.”
“Ah, but who’s to watch you, Dowlas, and see you do it? That’s no fair bet,” said the butcher.
“Ah, but who’s going to keep an eye on you, Dowlas, and make sure you actually do it? That’s not a fair bet,” said the butcher.
“No fair bet?” replied Mr. Dowlas, angrily. “I should like to hear any man stand up and say I want to bet unfair. Come now, Master Lundy, I should like to hear you say it.”
“No fair bet?” replied Mr. Dowlas, angrily. “I’d like to hear any man say he wants to bet unfairly. Come on, Master Lundy, I want to hear you say it.”
“Very like you would,” said the butcher. “But it’s no business o’ mine. You’re none o’ my bargains, and I aren’t a-going to try and ’bate your price. If anybody ’ll bid for you at your own vallying, let him. I’m for peace and quietness, I am.”
“Just like you would,” said the butcher. “But it’s not my concern. You’re not one of my deals, and I’m not going to try to lower your price. If someone wants to bid for you at your own value, let them. I’m all about peace and quiet, that’s me.”
“Yes, that’s what every yapping cur is, when you hold a stick up at him,” said the farrier. “But I’m afraid o’ neither man nor ghost, and I’m ready to lay a fair bet. I aren’t a turn-tail cur.”
“Yeah, that’s just what every barking dog is when you wave a stick at him,” the farrier said. “But I’m not afraid of either man or ghost, and I’m ready to place a fair bet. I am not a coward.”
“Aye, but there’s this in it, Dowlas,” said the landlord, speaking in a tone of much candour and tolerance. “There’s folks, i’ my opinion, they can’t see ghos’es, not if they stood as plain as a pike-staff before ’em. And there’s reason i’ that. For there’s my wife, now, can’t smell, not if she’d the strongest o’ cheese under her nose. I never see’d a ghost myself; but then I says to myself, ‘Very like I haven’t got the smell for ’em.’ I mean, putting a ghost for a smell, or else contrairiways. And so, I’m for holding with both sides; for, as I say, the truth lies between ’em. And if Dowlas was to go and stand, and say he’d never seen a wink o’ Cliff’s Holiday all the night through, I’d back him; and if anybody said as Cliff’s Holiday was certain sure, for all that, I’d back him too. For the smell’s what I go by.”
“Yeah, but here's the thing, Dowlas,” the landlord said, speaking openly and with a lot of patience. “There are people, in my opinion, who can’t see ghosts, even if they were right in front of them. And there’s a reason for that. Take my wife, for example; she can’t smell, even if the strongest cheese was right under her nose. I’ve never seen a ghost myself; but then I think, ‘It’s possible I just can’t smell them.’ I mean, considering a ghost as a smell, or the other way around. So, I’m open to both perspectives; because, as I said, the truth is somewhere in between. And if Dowlas were to say he hadn’t seen a single thing of Cliff’s Holiday all night, I’d support him; and if anyone claimed that Cliff’s Holiday definitely happened, I’d back them too. Because smell is what I trust.”
The landlord’s analogical argument was not well received by the farrier—a man intensely opposed to compromise.
The landlord's comparison didn't sit well with the farrier—a guy who was deeply against compromise.
“Tut, tut,” he said, setting down his glass with refreshed irritation; “what’s the smell got to do with it? Did ever a ghost give a man a black eye? That’s what I should like to know. If ghos’es want me to believe in ’em, let ’em leave off skulking i’ the dark and i’ lone places—let ’em come where there’s company and candles.”
“Tut, tut,” he said, putting down his glass with renewed irritation; “what’s the smell got to do with it? Has a ghost ever given someone a black eye? That’s what I’d like to know. If ghosts want me to believe in them, they should stop hiding in the dark and lonely places—let them come where there’s company and candles.”
“As if ghos’es ’ud want to be believed in by anybody so ignirant!” said Mr. Macey, in deep disgust at the farrier’s crass incompetence to apprehend the conditions of ghostly phenomena.
“As if ghosts would want to be believed in by anyone so ignorant!” said Mr. Macey, in deep disgust at the farrier’s complete inability to understand the realities of ghostly phenomena.
CHAPTER VII.
Yet the next moment there seemed to be some evidence that ghosts had a more condescending disposition than Mr. Macey attributed to them; for the pale thin figure of Silas Marner was suddenly seen standing in the warm light, uttering no word, but looking round at the company with his strange unearthly eyes. The long pipes gave a simultaneous movement, like the antennae of startled insects, and every man present, not excepting even the sceptical farrier, had an impression that he saw, not Silas Marner in the flesh, but an apparition; for the door by which Silas had entered was hidden by the high-screened seats, and no one had noticed his approach. Mr. Macey, sitting a long way off the ghost, might be supposed to have felt an argumentative triumph, which would tend to neutralize his share of the general alarm. Had he not always said that when Silas Marner was in that strange trance of his, his soul went loose from his body? Here was the demonstration: nevertheless, on the whole, he would have been as well contented without it. For a few moments there was a dead silence, Marner’s want of breath and agitation not allowing him to speak. The landlord, under the habitual sense that he was bound to keep his house open to all company, and confident in the protection of his unbroken neutrality, at last took on himself the task of adjuring the ghost.
Yet the next moment, it seemed like ghosts had a more superior attitude than Mr. Macey thought; for the pale, thin figure of Silas Marner suddenly appeared in the warm light, saying nothing but looking around at the group with his strange, otherworldly eyes. The long pipes all moved at once, like the antennae of startled insects, and every man present, even the skeptical farrier, felt that he saw not Silas Marner in the flesh, but a ghostly vision; since the door Silas had come in through was blocked by the high-backed seats, and no one had noticed him arrive. Mr. Macey, sitting quite far from the ghost, might have felt a sense of argumentative victory, which would help lessen his part in the overall fear. Hadn’t he always claimed that when Silas Marner was in that strange trance, his soul detached from his body? Here was the proof; still, overall, he would have preferred not having it. For a few moments, there was a complete silence, as Marner’s shortness of breath and agitation prevented him from speaking. The landlord, feeling that he had to keep his establishment open to everyone and confident in the safety of his unbroken neutrality, finally took it upon himself to address the ghost.
“Master Marner,” he said, in a conciliatory tone, “what’s lacking to you? What’s your business here?”
“Master Marner,” he said, in a friendly tone, “what do you need? What brings you here?”
“Robbed!” said Silas, gaspingly. “I’ve been robbed! I want the constable—and the Justice—and Squire Cass—and Mr. Crackenthorp.”
“Robbed!” Silas gasped. “I’ve been robbed! I need the constable—and the Justice—and Squire Cass—and Mr. Crackenthorp.”
“Lay hold on him, Jem Rodney,” said the landlord, the idea of a ghost subsiding; “he’s off his head, I doubt. He’s wet through.”
“Grab him, Jem Rodney,” said the landlord, the thought of a ghost fading away; “he’s out of his mind, I think. He’s soaked.”
Jem Rodney was the outermost man, and sat conveniently near Marner’s standing-place; but he declined to give his services.
Jem Rodney was the guy on the edge and sat conveniently close to where Marner was standing; however, he refused to offer his help.
“Come and lay hold on him yourself, Mr. Snell, if you’ve a mind,” said Jem, rather sullenly. “He’s been robbed, and murdered too, for what I know,” he added, in a muttering tone.
“Come and grab him yourself, Mr. Snell, if you want,” said Jem, somewhat grumpily. “He’s been robbed, and murdered too, for all I know,” he added, in a mumbling tone.
“Jem Rodney!” said Silas, turning and fixing his strange eyes on the suspected man.
“Jem Rodney!” Silas said, turning to glare at the man he suspected.
“Aye, Master Marner, what do you want wi’ me?” said Jem, trembling a little, and seizing his drinking-can as a defensive weapon.
“Aye, Master Marner, what do you want with me?” said Jem, trembling a bit, and grabbing his drinking can as a defensive weapon.
“If it was you stole my money,” said Silas, clasping his hands entreatingly, and raising his voice to a cry, “give it me back—and I won’t meddle with you. I won’t set the constable on you. Give it me back, and I’ll let you—I’ll let you have a guinea.”
“If it was you who stole my money,” Silas said, pleading as he clasped his hands and raised his voice to a shout, “give it back to me—and I won’t bother you. I won’t call the cops on you. Just give it back, and I’ll let you—I’ll let you have a guinea.”
“Me stole your money!” said Jem, angrily. “I’ll pitch this can at your eye if you talk o’ my stealing your money.”
“Me stole your money!” Jem shouted, furious. “I’ll throw this can at your eye if you keep talking about my stealing your money.”
“Come, come, Master Marner,” said the landlord, now rising resolutely, and seizing Marner by the shoulder, “if you’ve got any information to lay, speak it out sensible, and show as you’re in your right mind, if you expect anybody to listen to you. You’re as wet as a drownded rat. Sit down and dry yourself, and speak straight forrard.”
“Come on, Master Marner,” said the landlord, getting up firmly and grabbing Marner by the shoulder, “if you have anything to say, speak clearly and show that you’re thinking straight if you want anyone to listen to you. You’re soaking wet. Sit down, dry off, and talk straightforward.”
“Ah, to be sure, man,” said the farrier, who began to feel that he had not been quite on a par with himself and the occasion. “Let’s have no more staring and screaming, else we’ll have you strapped for a madman. That was why I didn’t speak at the first—thinks I, the man’s run mad.”
“Yeah, for sure, man,” said the farrier, who started to realize that he hadn’t been quite himself for the situation. “Let’s cut out the staring and screaming, or you’ll end up being treated like a madman. That’s why I didn’t say anything at first—I thought, this guy has lost it.”
“Aye, aye, make him sit down,” said several voices at once, well pleased that the reality of ghosts remained still an open question.
“Yeah, yeah, have him sit down,” several voices said at once, happy that the reality of ghosts was still up for debate.
The landlord forced Marner to take off his coat, and then to sit down on a chair aloof from every one else, in the centre of the circle and in the direct rays of the fire. The weaver, too feeble to have any distinct purpose beyond that of getting help to recover his money, submitted unresistingly. The transient fears of the company were now forgotten in their strong curiosity, and all faces were turned towards Silas, when the landlord, having seated himself again, said—
The landlord made Marner take off his coat and sit down on a chair away from everyone else, right in the middle of the group and in the bright light of the fire. The weaver, too weak to think of anything other than getting help to retrieve his money, went along with it without resisting. The momentary fears of the group faded as their intense curiosity took over, and all eyes were on Silas when the landlord, settling back into his seat, said—
“Now then, Master Marner, what’s this you’ve got to say—as you’ve been robbed? Speak out.”
“Okay, Master Marner, what’s going on? I hear you’ve been robbed. Just tell us.”
“He’d better not say again as it was me robbed him,” cried Jem Rodney, hastily. “What could I ha’ done with his money? I could as easy steal the parson’s surplice, and wear it.”
“He better not say again that I robbed him,” Jem Rodney shouted quickly. “What could I have done with his money? I could just as easily steal the parson’s surplice and wear it.”
“Hold your tongue, Jem, and let’s hear what he’s got to say,” said the landlord. “Now then, Master Marner.”
“Be quiet, Jem, and let’s hear what he has to say,” said the landlord. “Alright then, Master Marner.”
Silas now told his story, under frequent questioning as the mysterious character of the robbery became evident.
Silas now shared his story, frequently prompted by questions as the mysterious nature of the robbery became clear.
This strangely novel situation of opening his trouble to his Raveloe neighbours, of sitting in the warmth of a hearth not his own, and feeling the presence of faces and voices which were his nearest promise of help, had doubtless its influence on Marner, in spite of his passionate preoccupation with his loss. Our consciousness rarely registers the beginning of a growth within us any more than without us: there have been many circulations of the sap before we detect the smallest sign of the bud.
This unusual situation of sharing his troubles with his Raveloe neighbors, sitting in the warmth of a hearth that wasn't his own, and feeling the presence of familiar faces and voices that were his closest promise of help, undoubtedly affected Marner, despite his intense focus on his loss. We often don’t notice the start of growth within us just like we do not see it around us: there have been many flows of energy before we notice even the tiniest sign of a bud.
The slight suspicion with which his hearers at first listened to him, gradually melted away before the convincing simplicity of his distress: it was impossible for the neighbours to doubt that Marner was telling the truth, not because they were capable of arguing at once from the nature of his statements to the absence of any motive for making them falsely, but because, as Mr. Macey observed, “Folks as had the devil to back ’em were not likely to be so mushed” as poor Silas was. Rather, from the strange fact that the robber had left no traces, and had happened to know the nick of time, utterly incalculable by mortal agents, when Silas would go away from home without locking his door, the more probable conclusion seemed to be, that his disreputable intimacy in that quarter, if it ever existed, had been broken up, and that, in consequence, this ill turn had been done to Marner by somebody it was quite in vain to set the constable after. Why this preternatural felon should be obliged to wait till the door was left unlocked, was a question which did not present itself.
The initial doubt that his listeners felt gradually faded away in response to the heartfelt simplicity of his distress: it was impossible for the neighbors to doubt that Marner was being honest, not because they could immediately reason from the nature of his claims to the lack of any motive for lying, but because, as Mr. Macey noted, “People with the devil on their side weren’t likely to be so soft” as poor Silas was. Instead, given the strange fact that the thief hadn’t left any traces and seemed to know the exact moment—utterly unpredictable by mere mortals—when Silas would leave home without locking his door, it seemed more likely that any shady dealings he might have had in that area were over, and as a result, this wrong had been done to Marner by someone it was pointless to send the constable after. Why this supernatural criminal would wait for the door to be left unlocked was a question that didn’t come up.
“It isn’t Jem Rodney as has done this work, Master Marner,” said the landlord. “You mustn’t be a-casting your eye at poor Jem. There may be a bit of a reckoning against Jem for the matter of a hare or so, if anybody was bound to keep their eyes staring open, and niver to wink; but Jem’s been a-sitting here drinking his can, like the decentest man i’ the parish, since before you left your house, Master Marner, by your own account.”
“It’s not Jem Rodney who did this work, Master Marner,” said the landlord. “You shouldn’t be looking at poor Jem. There might be a bit of trouble for Jem over a hare or two, if anyone was supposed to keep their eyes wide open and never blink; but Jem’s been sitting here drinking his beer like the most decent man in the parish since before you left your house, Master Marner, by your own account.”
“Aye, aye,” said Mr. Macey; “let’s have no accusing o’ the innicent. That isn’t the law. There must be folks to swear again’ a man before he can be ta’en up. Let’s have no accusing o’ the innicent, Master Marner.”
“Aye, aye,” said Mr. Macey; “let’s not accuse the innocent. That’s not how the law works. There have to be people to testify against a man before he can be arrested. Let’s not accuse the innocent, Master Marner.”
Memory was not so utterly torpid in Silas that it could not be awakened by these words. With a movement of compunction as new and strange to him as everything else within the last hour, he started from his chair and went close up to Jem, looking at him as if he wanted to assure himself of the expression in his face.
Memory wasn’t completely dormant in Silas that it couldn’t be stirred by these words. Feeling a sense of guilt that was as new and unfamiliar to him as everything else in the last hour, he got up from his chair and approached Jem, studying his face as if he needed to confirm the look on it.
“I was wrong,” he said—“yes, yes—I ought to have thought. There’s nothing to witness against you, Jem. Only you’d been into my house oftener than anybody else, and so you came into my head. I don’t accuse you—I won’t accuse anybody—only,” he added, lifting up his hands to his head, and turning away with bewildered misery, “I try—I try to think where my guineas can be.”
“I was wrong,” he said. “Yes, yes—I should have thought about it. There’s nothing to hold against you, Jem. It’s just that you’ve been in my house more than anyone else, so you came to mind. I don’t blame you—I won’t blame anyone—but,” he added, raising his hands to his head and turning away in confused misery, “I’m trying—I’m trying to think about where my guineas could be.”
“Aye, aye, they’re gone where it’s hot enough to melt ’em, I doubt,” said Mr. Macey.
“Aye, aye, they’re gone where it’s hot enough to melt them, I doubt,” said Mr. Macey.
“Tchuh!” said the farrier. And then he asked, with a cross-examining air, “How much money might there be in the bags, Master Marner?”
“Tchuh!” said the blacksmith. Then he asked, with an interrogating look, “How much money do you think is in the bags, Master Marner?”
“Two hundred and seventy-two pounds, twelve and sixpence, last night when I counted it,” said Silas, seating himself again, with a groan.
“Two hundred seventy-two pounds, twelve shillings and sixpence, last night when I counted it,” said Silas, sitting down again, with a groan.
“Pooh! why, they’d be none so heavy to carry. Some tramp’s been in, that’s all; and as for the no footmarks, and the bricks and the sand being all right—why, your eyes are pretty much like a insect’s, Master Marner; they’re obliged to look so close, you can’t see much at a time. It’s my opinion as, if I’d been you, or you’d been me—for it comes to the same thing—you wouldn’t have thought you’d found everything as you left it. But what I vote is, as two of the sensiblest o’ the company should go with you to Master Kench, the constable’s—he’s ill i’ bed, I know that much—and get him to appoint one of us his deppity; for that’s the law, and I don’t think anybody ’ull take upon him to contradick me there. It isn’t much of a walk to Kench’s; and then, if it’s me as is deppity, I’ll go back with you, Master Marner, and examine your premises; and if anybody’s got any fault to find with that, I’ll thank him to stand up and say it out like a man.”
“Pooh! They wouldn't be that heavy to carry. Some drifter's been around, that's all; and about the lack of footprints, and the bricks and sand being fine—your eyes are quite a bit like an insect’s, Master Marner; you have to look so closely that you can’t see much at once. I think that if I were you, or you were me—since it's basically the same—you wouldn’t have thought everything was just as you left it. But what I propose is that two of the most sensible people here go with you to Master Kench, the constable—he's sick in bed, I know that much—and get him to appoint one of us as his deputy; because that's the law, and I don't think anyone will dare to argue with me on this. It's not much of a walk to Kench’s; and then, if I become the deputy, I’ll go back with you, Master Marner, and check out your place; and if anyone has a problem with that, I’d like them to speak up like a man.”
By this pregnant speech the farrier had re-established his self-complacency, and waited with confidence to hear himself named as one of the superlatively sensible men.
By this confident talk, the farrier had regained his self-satisfaction and eagerly waited to hear himself recognized as one of the exceptionally sensible people.
“Let us see how the night is, though,” said the landlord, who also considered himself personally concerned in this proposition. “Why, it rains heavy still,” he said, returning from the door.
“Let’s see what the night is like, though,” said the landlord, who felt personally invested in this suggestion. “Well, it’s still raining heavily,” he said as he came back from the door.
“Well, I’m not the man to be afraid o’ the rain,” said the farrier. “For it’ll look bad when Justice Malam hears as respectable men like us had a information laid before ’em and took no steps.”
“Well, I’m not the kind of guy who’s scared of the rain,” said the farrier. “Because it’ll look bad when Justice Malam hears that respectable men like us were given information and didn’t do anything.”
The landlord agreed with this view, and after taking the sense of the company, and duly rehearsing a small ceremony known in high ecclesiastical life as the nolo episcopari, he consented to take on himself the chill dignity of going to Kench’s. But to the farrier’s strong disgust, Mr. Macey now started an objection to his proposing himself as a deputy-constable; for that oracular old gentleman, claiming to know the law, stated, as a fact delivered to him by his father, that no doctor could be a constable.
The landlord agreed with this opinion, and after gauging the group's sentiment, and formally going through a small ceremony known in high church circles as the nolo episcopari, he agreed to take on the chilly responsibility of heading over to Kench’s. However, to the farrier’s utter dismay, Mr. Macey then raised an objection to him volunteering as a deputy constable; that wise old man, claiming to be knowledgeable about the law, asserted, based on information passed down from his father, that no doctor could serve as a constable.
“And you’re a doctor, I reckon, though you’re only a cow-doctor—for a fly’s a fly, though it may be a hoss-fly,” concluded Mr. Macey, wondering a little at his own “’cuteness”.
“And you’re a doctor, I guess, even if you’re just a vet—for a fly’s a fly, even if it’s a horsefly,” Mr. Macey finished, slightly surprised at his own cleverness.
There was a hot debate upon this, the farrier being of course indisposed to renounce the quality of doctor, but contending that a doctor could be a constable if he liked—the law meant, he needn’t be one if he didn’t like. Mr. Macey thought this was nonsense, since the law was not likely to be fonder of doctors than of other folks. Moreover, if it was in the nature of doctors more than of other men not to like being constables, how came Mr. Dowlas to be so eager to act in that capacity?
There was a heated debate about this, with the farrier being understandably unwilling to give up the title of doctor. He argued that a doctor could choose to be a constable if he wanted to—the law allowed it, but he didn’t have to if he didn’t want to. Mr. Macey thought this was ridiculous, since the law probably didn’t favor doctors any more than anyone else. Plus, if it was in doctors’ nature to dislike being constables more than others, then why was Mr. Dowlas so eager to take on that role?
“I don’t want to act the constable,” said the farrier, driven into a corner by this merciless reasoning; “and there’s no man can say it of me, if he’d tell the truth. But if there’s to be any jealousy and envying about going to Kench’s in the rain, let them go as like it—you won’t get me to go, I can tell you.”
I don’t want to play the policeman,” said the farrier, cornered by this ruthless logic; “and no one can honestly say that about me. But if there’s going to be any jealousy and envy over going to Kench’s in the rain, they can go ahead and do it—I’m not going, that’s for sure.”
By the landlord’s intervention, however, the dispute was accommodated. Mr. Dowlas consented to go as a second person disinclined to act officially; and so poor Silas, furnished with some old coverings, turned out with his two companions into the rain again, thinking of the long night-hours before him, not as those do who long to rest, but as those who expect to “watch for the morning”.
By the landlord's intervention, the dispute was resolved. Mr. Dowlas agreed to go as a second person who didn't want to act officially; and so poor Silas, given some old coverings, went out with his two companions into the rain again, thinking of the long night ahead, not like someone who longs to rest, but like someone who expects to "watch for the morning."
CHAPTER VIII.
When Godfrey Cass returned from Mrs. Osgood’s party at midnight, he was not much surprised to learn that Dunsey had not come home. Perhaps he had not sold Wildfire, and was waiting for another chance—perhaps, on that foggy afternoon, he had preferred housing himself at the Red Lion at Batherley for the night, if the run had kept him in that neighbourhood; for he was not likely to feel much concern about leaving his brother in suspense. Godfrey’s mind was too full of Nancy Lammeter’s looks and behaviour, too full of the exasperation against himself and his lot, which the sight of her always produced in him, for him to give much thought to Wildfire, or to the probabilities of Dunstan’s conduct.
When Godfrey Cass came back from Mrs. Osgood’s party at midnight, he wasn't too surprised to find out that Dunsey hadn't returned home. Maybe he hadn't sold Wildfire and was waiting for another opportunity—maybe, on that foggy afternoon, he chose to stay at the Red Lion in Batherley for the night if he was still in that area; he probably didn't care much about leaving his brother in suspense. Godfrey’s mind was too occupied with Nancy Lammeter’s looks and actions, too filled with frustration about himself and his situation that came from seeing her, to think much about Wildfire or what Dunstan might do.
The next morning the whole village was excited by the story of the robbery, and Godfrey, like every one else, was occupied in gathering and discussing news about it, and in visiting the Stone-pits. The rain had washed away all possibility of distinguishing foot-marks, but a close investigation of the spot had disclosed, in the direction opposite to the village, a tinder-box, with a flint and steel, half sunk in the mud. It was not Silas’s tinder-box, for the only one he had ever had was still standing on his shelf; and the inference generally accepted was, that the tinder-box in the ditch was somehow connected with the robbery. A small minority shook their heads, and intimated their opinion that it was not a robbery to have much light thrown on it by tinder-boxes, that Master Marner’s tale had a queer look with it, and that such things had been known as a man’s doing himself a mischief, and then setting the justice to look for the doer. But when questioned closely as to their grounds for this opinion, and what Master Marner had to gain by such false pretences, they only shook their heads as before, and observed that there was no knowing what some folks counted gain; moreover, that everybody had a right to their own opinions, grounds or no grounds, and that the weaver, as everybody knew, was partly crazy. Mr. Macey, though he joined in the defence of Marner against all suspicions of deceit, also pooh-poohed the tinder-box; indeed, repudiated it as a rather impious suggestion, tending to imply that everything must be done by human hands, and that there was no power which could make away with the guineas without moving the bricks. Nevertheless, he turned round rather sharply on Mr. Tookey, when the zealous deputy, feeling that this was a view of the case peculiarly suited to a parish-clerk, carried it still farther, and doubted whether it was right to inquire into a robbery at all when the circumstances were so mysterious.
The next morning, the entire village buzzed with excitement over the robbery, and Godfrey, like everyone else, was busy gathering and discussing news about it and checking out the Stone-pits. The rain had washed away any chance of identifying footprints, but a closer look at the area revealed a tinder-box, along with a flint and steel, partly buried in the mud in the direction away from the village. It wasn’t Silas’s tinder-box since the only one he ever had was still on his shelf. The common belief was that the tinder-box found in the ditch was somehow tied to the robbery. A small group shook their heads, suggesting that the situation involving the tinder-box didn’t really shed much light on the robbery, that Master Marner’s story seemed odd, and that there had been cases of someone harming themselves and then getting the authorities to look for the culprit. However, when asked to elaborate on their reasoning and what Master Marner could possibly gain from such deceit, they merely shook their heads again and remarked that you could never know what some people considered a gain; plus, everyone had the right to their own opinions, whether they were supported by evidence or not, and that the weaver, as everyone knew, was partly crazy. Mr. Macey, though he defended Marner against any claims of deceit, also dismissed the significance of the tinder-box; in fact, he rejected it as an irreverent idea that suggested everything must be accomplished by human effort and that no power could take the guineas without moving the bricks. Nevertheless, he snapped back at Mr. Tookey when the eager deputy, feeling this was an argument particularly suited for a parish clerk, pushed it further and questioned whether it was even appropriate to look into a robbery when the circumstances were so mysterious.
“As if,” concluded Mr. Tookey—“as if there was nothing but what could be made out by justices and constables.”
“As if,” Mr. Tookey concluded, “as if there was nothing that couldn't be figured out by justices and constables.”
“Now, don’t you be for overshooting the mark, Tookey,” said Mr. Macey, nodding his head aside admonishingly. “That’s what you’re allays at; if I throw a stone and hit, you think there’s summat better than hitting, and you try to throw a stone beyond. What I said was against the tinder-box: I said nothing against justices and constables, for they’re o’ King George’s making, and it ’ud be ill-becoming a man in a parish office to fly out again’ King George.”
“Now, don’t go overdoing it, Tookey,” Mr. Macey said, shaking his head in warning. “That’s what you always do; when I throw a stone and hit the target, you think there’s something better than just hitting it, and then you try to throw the stone even farther. What I said was against the tinder-box: I didn’t say anything against justices and constables, because they’re all made by King George, and it wouldn’t be appropriate for a man in a parish office to go off against King George.”
While these discussions were going on amongst the group outside the Rainbow, a higher consultation was being carried on within, under the presidency of Mr. Crackenthorp, the rector, assisted by Squire Cass and other substantial parishioners. It had just occurred to Mr. Snell, the landlord—he being, as he observed, a man accustomed to put two and two together—to connect with the tinder-box, which, as deputy-constable, he himself had had the honourable distinction of finding, certain recollections of a pedlar who had called to drink at the house about a month before, and had actually stated that he carried a tinder-box about with him to light his pipe. Here, surely, was a clue to be followed out. And as memory, when duly impregnated with ascertained facts, is sometimes surprisingly fertile, Mr. Snell gradually recovered a vivid impression of the effect produced on him by the pedlar’s countenance and conversation. He had a “look with his eye” which fell unpleasantly on Mr. Snell’s sensitive organism. To be sure, he didn’t say anything particular—no, except that about the tinder-box—but it isn’t what a man says, it’s the way he says it. Moreover, he had a swarthy foreignness of complexion which boded little honesty.
While these discussions were happening among the group outside the Rainbow, a more serious consultation was taking place inside, led by Mr. Crackenthorp, the rector, with help from Squire Cass and other prominent parishioners. Mr. Snell, the landlord—who, as he pointed out, was a man who knew how to connect the dots—suddenly thought about the tinder-box that he had the honor of finding as deputy constable. He recalled that a peddler had stopped by to drink at the house about a month ago, claiming he carried a tinder-box with him to light his pipe. This seemed like a clue worth pursuing. And as memory, when mixed with established facts, can sometimes be quite surprising, Mr. Snell gradually retrieved a vivid impression of the effect the peddler's face and words had on him. The man had a “look in his eye” that made Mr. Snell feel uneasy. He didn’t say anything particularly striking—other than the comment about the tinder-box—but it’s not just what someone says; it’s the way they say it. Plus, he had a dark, foreign complexion that suggested he wasn’t very trustworthy.
“Did he wear ear-rings?” Mr. Crackenthorp wished to know, having some acquaintance with foreign customs.
“Did he have earrings?” Mr. Crackenthorp wanted to know, being somewhat familiar with foreign customs.
“Well—stay—let me see,” said Mr. Snell, like a docile clairvoyante, who would really not make a mistake if she could help it. After stretching the corners of his mouth and contracting his eyes, as if he were trying to see the ear-rings, he appeared to give up the effort, and said, “Well, he’d got ear-rings in his box to sell, so it’s nat’ral to suppose he might wear ’em. But he called at every house, a’most, in the village; there’s somebody else, mayhap, saw ’em in his ears, though I can’t take upon me rightly to say.”
“Well—hold on—let me think,” said Mr. Snell, like a willing psychic, who wouldn’t mess up if she could avoid it. After pulling back the corners of his mouth and squinting his eyes, as if he were trying to see the earrings, he seemed to give up and said, “Well, he had earrings in his box to sell, so it’s natural to think he might wear them. But he went to almost every house in the village; maybe someone else saw them in his ears, though I can’t say for sure.”
Mr. Snell was correct in his surmise, that somebody else would remember the pedlar’s ear-rings. For on the spread of inquiry among the villagers it was stated with gathering emphasis, that the parson had wanted to know whether the pedlar wore ear-rings in his ears, and an impression was created that a great deal depended on the eliciting of this fact. Of course, every one who heard the question, not having any distinct image of the pedlar as without ear-rings, immediately had an image of him with ear-rings, larger or smaller, as the case might be; and the image was presently taken for a vivid recollection, so that the glazier’s wife, a well-intentioned woman, not given to lying, and whose house was among the cleanest in the village, was ready to declare, as sure as ever she meant to take the sacrament the very next Christmas that was ever coming, that she had seen big ear-rings, in the shape of the young moon, in the pedlar’s two ears; while Jinny Oates, the cobbler’s daughter, being a more imaginative person, stated not only that she had seen them too, but that they had made her blood creep, as it did at that very moment while there she stood.
Mr. Snell was right in his guess that someone else would remember the pedlar's earrings. As the villagers began to ask questions, it was increasingly mentioned that the parson wanted to know if the pedlar wore earrings. This created the impression that it was really important to find out. Naturally, everyone who heard the question, not having a clear image of the pedlar without earrings, immediately imagined him with earrings, whether big or small. This mental image soon became a strong memory, so that the glazier's wife, a well-meaning woman who didn’t lie and whose house was one of the cleanest in the village, was ready to swear, as surely as she planned to take communion the next Christmas, that she had seen large earrings shaped like the crescent moon in the pedlar's ears. Meanwhile, Jinny Oates, the cobbler's daughter, being more imaginative, claimed not only that she had seen them too, but that they had made her blood run cold, just as it did at that very moment while she stood there.
Also, by way of throwing further light on this clue of the tinder-box, a collection was made of all the articles purchased from the pedlar at various houses, and carried to the Rainbow to be exhibited there. In fact, there was a general feeling in the village, that for the clearing-up of this robbery there must be a great deal done at the Rainbow, and that no man need offer his wife an excuse for going there while it was the scene of severe public duties.
Also, to shed more light on the clue of the tinder-box, a collection was made of all the items bought from the peddler at different houses and taken to the Rainbow to be displayed there. In fact, there was a strong feeling in the village that a lot needed to be done at the Rainbow to solve this robbery, and no man should need to make excuses to his wife for going there while it was the center of important public responsibilities.
Some disappointment was felt, and perhaps a little indignation also, when it became known that Silas Marner, on being questioned by the Squire and the parson, had retained no other recollection of the pedlar than that he had called at his door, but had not entered his house, having turned away at once when Silas, holding the door ajar, had said that he wanted nothing. This had been Silas’s testimony, though he clutched strongly at the idea of the pedlar’s being the culprit, if only because it gave him a definite image of a whereabout for his gold after it had been taken away from its hiding-place: he could see it now in the pedlar’s box. But it was observed with some irritation in the village, that anybody but a “blind creatur” like Marner would have seen the man prowling about, for how came he to leave his tinder-box in the ditch close by, if he hadn’t been lingering there? Doubtless, he had made his observations when he saw Marner at the door. Anybody might know—and only look at him—that the weaver was a half-crazy miser. It was a wonder the pedlar hadn’t murdered him; men of that sort, with rings in their ears, had been known for murderers often and often; there had been one tried at the ’sizes, not so long ago but what there were people living who remembered it.
Some disappointment, and maybe a bit of anger, was felt when it became clear that Silas Marner, when asked by the Squire and the parson, could only recall that the pedlar had knocked on his door but hadn’t come inside; he turned away immediately after Silas, holding the door slightly open, said he didn’t want anything. This was Silas’s account, even though he strongly clung to the idea that the pedlar was the thief, if only because it gave him a clear picture of where his gold had gone after it was stolen: he could picture it in the pedlar’s box. But it was noticed with some irritation in the village that anyone other than a “blind creature” like Marner would have seen the guy hanging around; how else could he have left his tinder-box in the ditch nearby if he hadn’t been loitering there? Clearly, he had been watching when he saw Marner at the door. Anyone could tell—just by looking at him—that the weaver was a somewhat crazy miser. It was a wonder the pedlar hadn’t killed him; men like that, with earrings, were often known to be murderers; there had been one tried at the sessions not too long ago, which people still remembered.
Godfrey Cass, indeed, entering the Rainbow during one of Mr. Snell’s frequently repeated recitals of his testimony, had treated it lightly, stating that he himself had bought a pen-knife of the pedlar, and thought him a merry grinning fellow enough; it was all nonsense, he said, about the man’s evil looks. But this was spoken of in the village as the random talk of youth, “as if it was only Mr. Snell who had seen something odd about the pedlar!” On the contrary, there were at least half-a-dozen who were ready to go before Justice Malam, and give in much more striking testimony than any the landlord could furnish. It was to be hoped Mr. Godfrey would not go to Tarley and throw cold water on what Mr. Snell said there, and so prevent the justice from drawing up a warrant. He was suspected of intending this, when, after mid-day, he was seen setting off on horseback in the direction of Tarley.
Godfrey Cass, indeed, walked into the Rainbow during one of Mr. Snell’s frequent retellings of his story. He brushed it off, saying that he had bought a pen-knife from the traveling salesman and thought he was a jolly guy. It was all nonsense, he claimed, about the man’s creepy looks. But people in the village dismissed this as just youthful chatter, “as if only Mr. Snell had noticed something strange about the salesman!” On the contrary, there were at least six people ready to go before Justice Malam and provide much more compelling evidence than anything the landlord could offer. It was hoped that Mr. Godfrey wouldn’t go to Tarley and undermine what Mr. Snell had said there, thus preventing the justice from issuing a warrant. He was suspected of planning just that when, after midday, he was seen riding off toward Tarley.
But by this time Godfrey’s interest in the robbery had faded before his growing anxiety about Dunstan and Wildfire, and he was going, not to Tarley, but to Batherley, unable to rest in uncertainty about them any longer. The possibility that Dunstan had played him the ugly trick of riding away with Wildfire, to return at the end of a month, when he had gambled away or otherwise squandered the price of the horse, was a fear that urged itself upon him more, even, than the thought of an accidental injury; and now that the dance at Mrs. Osgood’s was past, he was irritated with himself that he had trusted his horse to Dunstan. Instead of trying to still his fears, he encouraged them, with that superstitious impression which clings to us all, that if we expect evil very strongly it is the less likely to come; and when he heard a horse approaching at a trot, and saw a hat rising above a hedge beyond an angle of the lane, he felt as if his conjuration had succeeded. But no sooner did the horse come within sight, than his heart sank again. It was not Wildfire; and in a few moments more he discerned that the rider was not Dunstan, but Bryce, who pulled up to speak, with a face that implied something disagreeable.
But by this time, Godfrey's concern about the robbery had faded, replaced by his growing anxiety about Dunstan and Wildfire. Instead of heading to Tarley, he was on his way to Batherley, unable to rest with uncertainty about them any longer. The thought that Dunstan might have tricked him by riding off with Wildfire, only to return in a month after gambling away or wasting the horse's worth, weighed on him even more than the fear of an accidental injury. Now that the dance at Mrs. Osgood’s was over, he found himself annoyed that he had trusted his horse to Dunstan. Rather than calming his fears, he fed into them, holding onto that superstitious idea that if we expect something bad to happen, it’s less likely to occur. When he heard a horse approaching at a trot and spotted a hat rising above a hedge around the corner, he felt as if his worry had been dispelled. But as soon as the horse came into view, his heart dropped again. It wasn’t Wildfire, and a moment later, he realized the rider wasn’t Dunstan either, but Bryce, who pulled up to talk, his expression suggesting something unpleasant.
“Well, Mr. Godfrey, that’s a lucky brother of yours, that Master Dunsey, isn’t he?”
“Well, Mr. Godfrey, your brother Master Dunsey is quite lucky, isn’t he?”
“What do you mean?” said Godfrey, hastily.
“What do you mean?” Godfrey said quickly.
“Why, hasn’t he been home yet?” said Bryce.
“Why, hasn’t he come home yet?” said Bryce.
“Home? no. What has happened? Be quick. What has he done with my horse?”
“Home? No. What’s going on? Hurry up. What did he do with my horse?”
“Ah, I thought it was yours, though he pretended you had parted with it to him.”
“Ah, I thought it was yours, even though he acted like you had given it to him.”
“Has he thrown him down and broken his knees?” said Godfrey, flushed with exasperation.
“Has he thrown him down and broken his knees?” Godfrey said, his face flushed with frustration.
“Worse than that,” said Bryce. “You see, I’d made a bargain with him to buy the horse for a hundred and twenty—a swinging price, but I always liked the horse. And what does he do but go and stake him—fly at a hedge with stakes in it, atop of a bank with a ditch before it. The horse had been dead a pretty good while when he was found. So he hasn’t been home since, has he?”
“Worse than that,” said Bryce. “You see, I’d made a deal with him to buy the horse for a hundred and twenty—a hefty price, but I always liked the horse. And what does he do? He goes and stakes him—charges at a hedge with stakes in it, on top of a bank with a ditch in front. The horse had been dead for quite some time when he was found. So he hasn’t been home since, right?”
“Home? no,” said Godfrey, “and he’d better keep away. Confound me for a fool! I might have known this would be the end of it.”
“Home? No,” said Godfrey, “and he’d better stay away. What a fool I am! I should have realized this would be how it ends.”
“Well, to tell you the truth,” said Bryce, “after I’d bargained for the horse, it did come into my head that he might be riding and selling the horse without your knowledge, for I didn’t believe it was his own. I knew Master Dunsey was up to his tricks sometimes. But where can he be gone? He’s never been seen at Batherley. He couldn’t have been hurt, for he must have walked off.”
"Well, to be honest," said Bryce, "after I made the deal for the horse, I started to think that he might be riding and selling it without you knowing, because I didn't think it was really his. I knew Master Dunsey could be sneaky sometimes. But where could he have gone? No one has seen him at Batherley. He couldn't have been hurt, since he must have walked away."
“Hurt?” said Godfrey, bitterly. “He’ll never be hurt—he’s made to hurt other people.”
“Hurt?” Godfrey said bitterly. “He’ll never be hurt—he’s meant to hurt other people.”
“And so you did give him leave to sell the horse, eh?” said Bryce.
“And so you did let him sell the horse, huh?” said Bryce.
“Yes; I wanted to part with the horse—he was always a little too hard in the mouth for me,” said Godfrey; his pride making him wince under the idea that Bryce guessed the sale to be a matter of necessity. “I was going to see after him—I thought some mischief had happened. I’ll go back now,” he added, turning the horse’s head, and wishing he could get rid of Bryce; for he felt that the long-dreaded crisis in his life was close upon him. “You’re coming on to Raveloe, aren’t you?”
"Yeah; I wanted to sell the horse—he was always a bit too tough in the mouth for my liking," Godfrey said, feeling a twinge of pride at the thought that Bryce assumed the sale was out of necessity. "I was just going to check on him—I thought something had happened. I’ll head back now," he added, turning the horse's head, hoping to shake off Bryce; he felt that the long-anticipated turning point in his life was near. "You’re coming to Raveloe, right?"
“Well, no, not now,” said Bryce. “I was coming round there, for I had to go to Flitton, and I thought I might as well take you in my way, and just let you know all I knew myself about the horse. I suppose Master Dunsey didn’t like to show himself till the ill news had blown over a bit. He’s perhaps gone to pay a visit at the Three Crowns, by Whitbridge—I know he’s fond of the house.”
“Well, not right now,” said Bryce. “I was on my way there because I needed to go to Flitton, and I thought I might as well pick you up along the way and share everything I knew about the horse. I guess Master Dunsey didn’t want to show his face until the bad news settled down a bit. He’s probably off visiting the Three Crowns, by Whitbridge—I know he really likes that place.”
“Perhaps he is,” said Godfrey, rather absently. Then rousing himself, he said, with an effort at carelessness, “We shall hear of him soon enough, I’ll be bound.”
“Maybe he is,” said Godfrey, somewhat distracted. Then, pulling himself together, he said, trying to sound casual, “We’ll hear about him soon enough, I’m sure.”
“Well, here’s my turning,” said Bryce, not surprised to perceive that Godfrey was rather “down”; “so I’ll bid you good-day, and wish I may bring you better news another time.”
“Well, here’s my turn,” said Bryce, noticing that Godfrey seemed a bit “down”; “so I’ll say goodbye and hope I can bring you better news next time.”
Godfrey rode along slowly, representing to himself the scene of confession to his father from which he felt that there was now no longer any escape. The revelation about the money must be made the very next morning; and if he withheld the rest, Dunstan would be sure to come back shortly, and, finding that he must bear the brunt of his father’s anger, would tell the whole story out of spite, even though he had nothing to gain by it. There was one step, perhaps, by which he might still win Dunstan’s silence and put off the evil day: he might tell his father that he had himself spent the money paid to him by Fowler; and as he had never been guilty of such an offence before, the affair would blow over after a little storming. But Godfrey could not bend himself to this. He felt that in letting Dunstan have the money, he had already been guilty of a breach of trust hardly less culpable than that of spending the money directly for his own behoof; and yet there was a distinction between the two acts which made him feel that the one was so much more blackening than the other as to be intolerable to him.
Godfrey rode along slowly, imagining the moment of confessing to his father that he felt he could no longer avoid. He had to reveal the truth about the money the very next morning; if he kept quiet, Dunstan would definitely come back soon, and, realizing he had to face their father's anger, would spill the whole story out of spite, even if there was nothing in it for him. There was one possibility, though, that might still keep Dunstan quiet and delay the inevitable: he could tell his father that he had spent the money Fowler gave him. Since he had never done anything like that before, the situation might blow over after some initial anger. But Godfrey couldn’t bring himself to do that. He felt that by allowing Dunstan to take the money, he had already committed a serious betrayal, nearly as bad as if he had spent the money for himself; yet he sensed a difference between the two actions that made him feel that one was far worse than the other and simply unacceptable to him.
“I don’t pretend to be a good fellow,” he said to himself; “but I’m not a scoundrel—at least, I’ll stop short somewhere. I’ll bear the consequences of what I have done sooner than make believe I’ve done what I never would have done. I’d never have spent the money for my own pleasure—I was tortured into it.”
“I don’t pretend to be a nice guy,” he said to himself; “but I’m not a jerk—at least, I’ll draw the line somewhere. I’ll face the consequences of what I have done rather than pretend I’ve done something I never would have done. I’d never have spent the money for my own enjoyment—I was forced into it.”
Through the remainder of this day Godfrey, with only occasional fluctuations, kept his will bent in the direction of a complete avowal to his father, and he withheld the story of Wildfire’s loss till the next morning, that it might serve him as an introduction to heavier matter. The old Squire was accustomed to his son’s frequent absence from home, and thought neither Dunstan’s nor Wildfire’s non-appearance a matter calling for remark. Godfrey said to himself again and again, that if he let slip this one opportunity of confession, he might never have another; the revelation might be made even in a more odious way than by Dunstan’s malignity: she might come as she had threatened to do. And then he tried to make the scene easier to himself by rehearsal: he made up his mind how he would pass from the admission of his weakness in letting Dunstan have the money to the fact that Dunstan had a hold on him which he had been unable to shake off, and how he would work up his father to expect something very bad before he told him the fact. The old Squire was an implacable man: he made resolutions in violent anger, and he was not to be moved from them after his anger had subsided—as fiery volcanic matters cool and harden into rock. Like many violent and implacable men, he allowed evils to grow under favour of his own heedlessness, till they pressed upon him with exasperating force, and then he turned round with fierce severity and became unrelentingly hard. This was his system with his tenants: he allowed them to get into arrears, neglect their fences, reduce their stock, sell their straw, and otherwise go the wrong way,—and then, when he became short of money in consequence of this indulgence, he took the hardest measures and would listen to no appeal. Godfrey knew all this, and felt it with the greater force because he had constantly suffered annoyance from witnessing his father’s sudden fits of unrelentingness, for which his own habitual irresolution deprived him of all sympathy. (He was not critical on the faulty indulgence which preceded these fits; that seemed to him natural enough.) Still there was just the chance, Godfrey thought, that his father’s pride might see this marriage in a light that would induce him to hush it up, rather than turn his son out and make the family the talk of the country for ten miles round.
Throughout the rest of the day, Godfrey, with only occasional doubts, focused his determination on confessing everything to his father. He decided to keep the story of Wildfire’s loss to himself until the next morning so that it could serve as a lead-in to even more serious issues. The old Squire was used to his son’s frequent absences and didn’t find the absence of either Dunstan or Wildfire worth mentioning. Godfrey kept reminding himself that if he missed this chance to confess, he might not get another; the truth could come out in a more embarrassing way than through Dunstan’s maliciousness: she could show up as she had threatened. He tried to make the upcoming confrontation easier by practicing it in his mind. He planned how he would transition from admitting his weakness in allowing Dunstan to take the money to explaining how Dunstan had leverage over him that he couldn’t break away from, and how he would prepare his father for something really bad before revealing the truth. The old Squire was unyielding; he made decisions in moments of intense anger and wouldn’t change his mind once his anger faded—just like fiery volcanic rock cools and hardens. Like many ruthless and unyielding people, he let problems fester due to his own negligence until they became overwhelming, then he would react with harshness and become unbending. This was his approach with his tenants: he let them fall behind on payments, ignore their fence maintenance, reduce their livestock, sell their straw, and generally mismanage things, and then when his finances suffered because of this leniency, he took harsh actions and refused to listen to any pleas. Godfrey was well aware of this and felt it even more because he had often been frustrated watching his father's sudden fits of unforgivingness, which his own habitual indecisiveness made him unable to sympathize with. (He didn’t criticize the flawed leniency that led to those outbursts; that felt pretty normal to him.) Still, Godfrey thought there was a slight chance that his father’s pride might view this marriage in a way that would make him prefer to cover it up rather than kick his son out and make the family the talk of the town for miles around.
This was the view of the case that Godfrey managed to keep before him pretty closely till midnight, and he went to sleep thinking that he had done with inward debating. But when he awoke in the still morning darkness he found it impossible to reawaken his evening thoughts; it was as if they had been tired out and were not to be roused to further work. Instead of arguments for confession, he could now feel the presence of nothing but its evil consequences: the old dread of disgrace came back—the old shrinking from the thought of raising a hopeless barrier between himself and Nancy—the old disposition to rely on chances which might be favourable to him, and save him from betrayal. Why, after all, should he cut off the hope of them by his own act? He had seen the matter in a wrong light yesterday. He had been in a rage with Dunstan, and had thought of nothing but a thorough break-up of their mutual understanding; but what it would be really wisest for him to do, was to try and soften his father’s anger against Dunsey, and keep things as nearly as possible in their old condition. If Dunsey did not come back for a few days (and Godfrey did not know but that the rascal had enough money in his pocket to enable him to keep away still longer), everything might blow over.
This was Godfrey's perspective on the situation that he managed to keep in mind pretty closely until midnight, and he went to sleep thinking he was done with inward debates. But when he woke up in the quiet morning darkness, he found it impossible to revive his thoughts from the night before; it was as if they had been exhausted and wouldn’t engage in further reflection. Instead of arguments for confession, he could only feel the weight of its bad outcomes: the familiar fear of disgrace returned—the familiar hesitation at the thought of creating a hopeless barrier between himself and Nancy—the familiar tendency to rely on chances that might work in his favor and save him from exposure. Why, after all, should he cut off his hope by his own doing? He had viewed the situation the wrong way yesterday. He had been furious with Dunstan and had only thought about fully breaking their mutual understanding; but what would be truly wise for him to do is to try and soften his father's anger towards Dunsey, keeping things as close to their previous state as possible. If Dunsey didn’t come back for a few days (and Godfrey didn’t know if the scoundrel had enough money to stay away even longer), everything might settle down.
CHAPTER IX.
Godfrey rose and took his own breakfast earlier than usual, but lingered in the wainscoted parlour till his younger brothers had finished their meal and gone out, awaiting his father, who always took a walk with his managing-man before breakfast. Every one breakfasted at a different hour in the Red House, and the Squire was always the latest, giving a long chance to a rather feeble morning appetite before he tried it. The table had been spread with substantial eatables nearly two hours before he presented himself—a tall, stout man of sixty, with a face in which the knit brow and rather hard glance seemed contradicted by the slack and feeble mouth. His person showed marks of habitual neglect, his dress was slovenly; and yet there was something in the presence of the old Squire distinguishable from that of the ordinary farmers in the parish, who were perhaps every whit as refined as he, but, having slouched their way through life with a consciousness of being in the vicinity of their “betters,” wanted that self-possession and authoritativeness of voice and carriage which belonged to a man who thought of superiors as remote existences with whom he had personally little more to do than with America or the stars. The Squire had been used to parish homage all his life, used to the presupposition that his family, his tankards, and everything that was his, were the oldest and best; and as he never associated with any gentry higher than himself, his opinion was not disturbed by comparison.
Godfrey got up and had his breakfast earlier than usual, but stayed in the paneled parlor until his younger brothers finished their meal and left, waiting for his father, who always took a walk with his estate manager before breakfast. Everyone in the Red House had breakfast at different times, and the Squire was always the last to eat, giving his somewhat weak morning appetite plenty of time to kick in before he tried to eat. The table had been set with hearty food nearly two hours before he arrived—a tall, heavyset man of sixty, with a face where his furrowed brows and rather hard gaze seemed contradicted by his slack and weak mouth. His appearance showed signs of constant neglect, and his clothes were messy; yet there was something about the old Squire that set him apart from the regular farmers in the parish, who might have been just as refined as he was but, having slouched through life with an awareness of being near their "betters," lacked the self-confidence and authority in voice and posture that belonged to a man who viewed superiors as distant beings with whom he had little more connection than with America or the stars. The Squire had been accustomed to the respect of the parish all his life, used to the assumption that his family, his tankards, and everything he had were the oldest and best; and since he never interacted with any gentry above his status, his opinions weren't shaken by comparison.
He glanced at his son as he entered the room, and said, “What, sir! haven’t you had your breakfast yet?” but there was no pleasant morning greeting between them; not because of any unfriendliness, but because the sweet flower of courtesy is not a growth of such homes as the Red House.
He looked at his son as he walked into the room and said, “What’s going on? Haven’t you had your breakfast yet?” But there was no friendly morning greeting between them; not because they were unfriendly, but because the simple kindness of courtesy doesn’t thrive in homes like the Red House.
“Yes, sir,” said Godfrey, “I’ve had my breakfast, but I was waiting to speak to you.”
“Yes, sir,” Godfrey said, “I’ve had my breakfast, but I was waiting to talk to you.”
“Ah! well,” said the Squire, throwing himself indifferently into his chair, and speaking in a ponderous coughing fashion, which was felt in Raveloe to be a sort of privilege of his rank, while he cut a piece of beef, and held it up before the deer-hound that had come in with him. “Ring the bell for my ale, will you? You youngsters’ business is your own pleasure, mostly. There’s no hurry about it for anybody but yourselves.”
“Ah, well,” said the Squire, casually sinking into his chair and speaking in a deep, coughing tone that everyone in Raveloe considered a kind of privilege of his status, as he sliced a piece of beef and held it up for the deer-hound that had come in with him. “Can you ring the bell for my ale? You kids are all about your own fun, after all. It’s not like anyone else is in a rush.”
The Squire’s life was quite as idle as his sons,’ but it was a fiction kept up by himself and his contemporaries in Raveloe that youth was exclusively the period of folly, and that their aged wisdom was constantly in a state of endurance mitigated by sarcasm. Godfrey waited, before he spoke again, until the ale had been brought and the door closed—an interval during which Fleet, the deer-hound, had consumed enough bits of beef to make a poor man’s holiday dinner.
The Squire’s life was just as lazy as his sons’, but he and the people in Raveloe pretended that youth was the only time for foolishness, and that their grown-up insight was always suffering, softened by sarcasm. Godfrey waited to speak again until the ale had arrived and the door was shut—during which time Fleet, the deer-hound, had eaten enough scraps of beef to make a poor man's holiday dinner.
“There’s been a cursed piece of ill-luck with Wildfire,” he began; “happened the day before yesterday.”
“There’s been a string of bad luck with Wildfire,” he said; “it happened the day before yesterday.”
“What! broke his knees?” said the Squire, after taking a draught of ale. “I thought you knew how to ride better than that, sir. I never threw a horse down in my life. If I had, I might ha’ whistled for another, for my father wasn’t quite so ready to unstring as some other fathers I know of. But they must turn over a new leaf—they must. What with mortgages and arrears, I’m as short o’ cash as a roadside pauper. And that fool Kimble says the newspaper’s talking about peace. Why, the country wouldn’t have a leg to stand on. Prices ’ud run down like a jack, and I should never get my arrears, not if I sold all the fellows up. And there’s that damned Fowler, I won’t put up with him any longer; I’ve told Winthrop to go to Cox this very day. The lying scoundrel told me he’d be sure to pay me a hundred last month. He takes advantage because he’s on that outlying farm, and thinks I shall forget him.”
“What! You broke your knees?” said the Squire, after taking a drink of ale. “I thought you knew how to ride better than that, sir. I’ve never thrown a horse down in my life. If I had, I might as well have whistled for another because my father wasn’t quite so quick to let go as some other fathers I know. But they really need to change their ways—they must. With mortgages and bills piling up, I’m as broke as a roadside beggar. And that fool Kimble says the newspaper’s talking about peace. Please, the country wouldn’t stand a chance. Prices would drop like a stone, and I’d never collect my dues, not even if I sold all the guys off. And there’s that damn Fowler; I won’t tolerate him any longer. I’ve told Winthrop to go to Cox today. The lying scoundrel told me he’d definitely pay me a hundred last month. He takes advantage because he’s on that outlying farm and thinks I’ll forget about him.”
The Squire had delivered this speech in a coughing and interrupted manner, but with no pause long enough for Godfrey to make it a pretext for taking up the word again. He felt that his father meant to ward off any request for money on the ground of the misfortune with Wildfire, and that the emphasis he had thus been led to lay on his shortness of cash and his arrears was likely to produce an attitude of mind the utmost unfavourable for his own disclosure. But he must go on, now he had begun.
The Squire delivered this speech while coughing and interrupting himself, but he didn’t pause long enough for Godfrey to use it as a chance to speak up again. Godfrey realized that his father intended to avoid any request for money based on the incident with Wildfire, and the emphasis he placed on being short on cash and his debts would likely create a mindset that was very unfavorable for Godfrey’s own revelation. But he had to continue now that he had started.
“It’s worse than breaking the horse’s knees—he’s been staked and killed,” he said, as soon as his father was silent, and had begun to cut his meat. “But I wasn’t thinking of asking you to buy me another horse; I was only thinking I’d lost the means of paying you with the price of Wildfire, as I’d meant to do. Dunsey took him to the hunt to sell him for me the other day, and after he’d made a bargain for a hundred and twenty with Bryce, he went after the hounds, and took some fool’s leap or other that did for the horse at once. If it hadn’t been for that, I should have paid you a hundred pounds this morning.”
“It’s worse than breaking the horse’s knees—he’s been staked and killed,” he said as soon as his father fell silent and started cutting his meat. “But I wasn’t thinking of asking you to buy me another horse; I was just thinking I’d lost the means to pay you with the money from Wildfire, like I meant to. Dunsey took him to the hunt to sell him for me the other day, and after he made a deal for a hundred and twenty with Bryce, he went after the hounds and took some stupid leap that ended it for the horse right away. If it hadn’t been for that, I would have paid you a hundred pounds this morning.”
The Squire had laid down his knife and fork, and was staring at his son in amazement, not being sufficiently quick of brain to form a probable guess as to what could have caused so strange an inversion of the paternal and filial relations as this proposition of his son to pay him a hundred pounds.
The Squire had put down his knife and fork and was looking at his son in shock, unable to think quickly enough to figure out why his son would suggest something so unusual as offering him a hundred pounds.
“The truth is, sir—I’m very sorry—I was quite to blame,” said Godfrey. “Fowler did pay that hundred pounds. He paid it to me, when I was over there one day last month. And Dunsey bothered me for the money, and I let him have it, because I hoped I should be able to pay it you before this.”
“The truth is, sir—I’m really sorry—I was definitely at fault,” said Godfrey. “Fowler did pay that hundred pounds. He gave it to me when I was over there one day last month. And Dunsey kept pestering me for the money, and I gave it to him because I thought I would be able to pay you back by now.”
The Squire was purple with anger before his son had done speaking, and found utterance difficult. “You let Dunsey have it, sir? And how long have you been so thick with Dunsey that you must collogue with him to embezzle my money? Are you turning out a scamp? I tell you I won’t have it. I’ll turn the whole pack of you out of the house together, and marry again. I’d have you to remember, sir, my property’s got no entail on it;—since my grandfather’s time the Casses can do as they like with their land. Remember that, sir. Let Dunsey have the money! Why should you let Dunsey have the money? There’s some lie at the bottom of it.”
The Squire was furious before his son even finished speaking, struggling to find the words. “You let Dunsey have it, huh? How long have you been so close with Dunsey that you're teaming up with him to steal my money? Are you turning into a scoundrel? I swear I won't stand for it. I’ll kick all of you out of the house together and get married again. Just remember, my property isn’t tied up in any entitlements; since my grandfather’s time, the Casses can do whatever they want with their land. Keep that in mind. Let Dunsey have the money! Why would you let Dunsey have the money? There’s some sort of lie behind this.”
“There’s no lie, sir,” said Godfrey. “I wouldn’t have spent the money myself, but Dunsey bothered me, and I was a fool, and let him have it. But I meant to pay it, whether he did or not. That’s the whole story. I never meant to embezzle money, and I’m not the man to do it. You never knew me do a dishonest trick, sir.”
“There’s no lie, sir,” said Godfrey. “I wouldn’t have spent the money myself, but Dunsey kept bothering me, and I was a fool for giving it to him. But I planned to pay it back, whether he did or not. That’s the whole story. I never meant to steal money, and I’m not the kind of person who would do that. You’ve never known me to do anything dishonest, sir.”
“Where’s Dunsey, then? What do you stand talking there for? Go and fetch Dunsey, as I tell you, and let him give account of what he wanted the money for, and what he’s done with it. He shall repent it. I’ll turn him out. I said I would, and I’ll do it. He shan’t brave me. Go and fetch him.”
“Where’s Dunsey? What are you just standing there for? Go get Dunsey, like I said, and let him explain why he wanted the money and what he did with it. He’s going to regret this. I’ll kick him out. I said I would, and I will. He won’t disrespect me like this. Go get him.”
“Dunsey isn’t come back, sir.”
“Dunsey isn’t coming back, sir.”
“What! did he break his own neck, then?” said the Squire, with some disgust at the idea that, in that case, he could not fulfil his threat.
“What! Did he break his own neck, then?” said the Squire, feeling some disgust at the thought that, if that were the case, he wouldn’t be able to carry out his threat.
“No, he wasn’t hurt, I believe, for the horse was found dead, and Dunsey must have walked off. I daresay we shall see him again by-and-by. I don’t know where he is.”
“No, I don’t think he was hurt, because the horse was found dead, and Dunsey must have walked away. I bet we’ll see him again sooner or later. I have no idea where he is.”
“And what must you be letting him have my money for? Answer me that,” said the Squire, attacking Godfrey again, since Dunsey was not within reach.
“And what do you think you’re letting him have my money for? Answer me that,” said the Squire, confronting Godfrey again, since Dunsey was out of reach.
“Well, sir, I don’t know,” said Godfrey, hesitatingly. That was a feeble evasion, but Godfrey was not fond of lying, and, not being sufficiently aware that no sort of duplicity can long flourish without the help of vocal falsehoods, he was quite unprepared with invented motives.
“Well, sir, I’m not sure,” Godfrey said, hesitantly. That was a weak excuse, but Godfrey didn’t like to lie, and since he wasn’t fully aware that any form of deceit can’t last long without some vocal falsehoods, he wasn’t ready with any made-up reasons.
“You don’t know? I tell you what it is, sir. You’ve been up to some trick, and you’ve been bribing him not to tell,” said the Squire, with a sudden acuteness which startled Godfrey, who felt his heart beat violently at the nearness of his father’s guess. The sudden alarm pushed him on to take the next step—a very slight impulse suffices for that on a downward road.
“You don’t know? Let me tell you, sir. You’ve been up to something, and you’ve been paying him off to keep quiet,” said the Squire, with a sharpness that took Godfrey by surprise, making his heart race at how close his father was to figuring it out. The jolt of fear pushed him to take the next step—a tiny nudge is all it takes to slide down a slippery slope.
“Why, sir,” he said, trying to speak with careless ease, “it was a little affair between me and Dunsey; it’s no matter to anybody else. It’s hardly worth while to pry into young men’s fooleries: it wouldn’t have made any difference to you, sir, if I’d not had the bad luck to lose Wildfire. I should have paid you the money.”
“Why, sir,” he said, trying to sound casual, “it was just a small issue between me and Dunsey; it doesn’t concern anyone else. It’s not really worth it to dig into young men’s mistakes: it wouldn’t have changed anything for you, sir, if I hadn’t been unlucky enough to lose Wildfire. I would have paid you the money.”
“Fooleries! Pshaw! it’s time you’d done with fooleries. And I’d have you know, sir, you must ha’ done with ’em,” said the Squire, frowning and casting an angry glance at his son. “Your goings-on are not what I shall find money for any longer. There’s my grandfather had his stables full o’ horses, and kept a good house, too, and in worse times, by what I can make out; and so might I, if I hadn’t four good-for-nothing fellows to hang on me like horse-leeches. I’ve been too good a father to you all—that’s what it is. But I shall pull up, sir.”
“Foolishness! Come on! It’s time you stopped with the nonsense. And I want you to know, sir, you have to stop it,” said the Squire, frowning and giving an angry look at his son. “I won’t be funding your antics any longer. My grandfather had stables full of horses and ran a great household, even in tougher times, from what I can tell; and I could do the same if I didn’t have four useless guys leeching off me. I’ve been too good a father to you—that’s what this is about. But I’m going to change that, sir.”
Godfrey was silent. He was not likely to be very penetrating in his judgments, but he had always had a sense that his father’s indulgence had not been kindness, and had had a vague longing for some discipline that would have checked his own errant weakness and helped his better will. The Squire ate his bread and meat hastily, took a deep draught of ale, then turned his chair from the table, and began to speak again.
Godfrey was quiet. He probably wasn't very insightful with his opinions, but he always felt that his father's leniency wasn’t really kindness, and he had a vague desire for some discipline that would have restrained his own waywardness and supported his better judgment. The Squire ate his bread and meat quickly, took a big swig of ale, then turned his chair away from the table and started to talk again.
“It’ll be all the worse for you, you know—you’d need try and help me keep things together.”
“It’ll be even worse for you, you know—you’ll need to try and help me keep things together.”
“Well, sir, I’ve often offered to take the management of things, but you know you’ve taken it ill always, and seemed to think I wanted to push you out of your place.”
“Well, sir, I’ve often suggested that I could handle things, but you know you've always taken it badly and seemed to think I wanted to force you out of your position.”
“I know nothing o’ your offering or o’ my taking it ill,” said the Squire, whose memory consisted in certain strong impressions unmodified by detail; “but I know, one while you seemed to be thinking o’ marrying, and I didn’t offer to put any obstacles in your way, as some fathers would. I’d as lieve you married Lammeter’s daughter as anybody. I suppose, if I’d said you nay, you’d ha’ kept on with it; but, for want o’ contradiction, you’ve changed your mind. You’re a shilly-shally fellow: you take after your poor mother. She never had a will of her own; a woman has no call for one, if she’s got a proper man for her husband. But your wife had need have one, for you hardly know your own mind enough to make both your legs walk one way. The lass hasn’t said downright she won’t have you, has she?”
“I know nothing about your offer or my taking it badly,” said the Squire, whose memory was based on certain strong impressions without much detail; “but I remember that at one point you seemed to be thinking about marrying, and I didn’t try to put any obstacles in your way, like some fathers would. I’d be just as okay with you marrying Lammeter’s daughter as anyone else. I guess if I had said no, you would have still gone along with it; but, without any pushback, you’ve changed your mind. You’re indecisive: you take after your poor mother. She never had a mind of her own; a woman doesn’t really need one if she has a proper man for a husband. But your wife will need to have a strong will, because you hardly know your own mind well enough to make both your legs go in the same direction. The girl hasn’t outright said she doesn’t want you, has she?”
“No,” said Godfrey, feeling very hot and uncomfortable; “but I don’t think she will.”
“No,” said Godfrey, feeling really hot and uneasy; “but I don’t think she will.”
“Think! why haven’t you the courage to ask her? Do you stick to it, you want to have her—that’s the thing?”
“Think! Why don’t you have the courage to ask her? Are you serious about wanting to be with her—that’s what it’s really about?”
“There’s no other woman I want to marry,” said Godfrey, evasively.
“There’s no other woman I want to marry,” Godfrey said, dodging the question.
“Well, then, let me make the offer for you, that’s all, if you haven’t the pluck to do it yourself. Lammeter isn’t likely to be loath for his daughter to marry into my family, I should think. And as for the pretty lass, she wouldn’t have her cousin—and there’s nobody else, as I see, could ha’ stood in your way.”
“Well, let me make the offer for you, since you don’t have the courage to do it yourself. Lammeter probably wouldn’t mind his daughter marrying into my family, I would think. And as for the pretty girl, she wouldn’t have her cousin—and there’s no one else, as far as I can see, who could have stood in your way.”
“I’d rather let it be, please sir, at present,” said Godfrey, in alarm. “I think she’s a little offended with me just now, and I should like to speak for myself. A man must manage these things for himself.”
“I’d prefer to leave it alone for now, please, sir,” said Godfrey, alarmed. “I think she’s a bit upset with me at the moment, and I want to handle this myself. A man needs to take care of these things on his own.”
“Well, speak, then, and manage it, and see if you can’t turn over a new leaf. That’s what a man must do when he thinks o’ marrying.”
"Well, go ahead and talk it out, and see if you can’t make a fresh start. That’s what a guy has to do when he considers getting married."
“I don’t see how I can think of it at present, sir. You wouldn’t like to settle me on one of the farms, I suppose, and I don’t think she’d come to live in this house with all my brothers. It’s a different sort of life to what she’s been used to.”
“I can’t really think about it right now, sir. I guess you wouldn’t want to put me on one of the farms, and I don’t think she’d want to live in this house with all my brothers. It’s a totally different kind of life than what she’s used to.”
“Not come to live in this house? Don’t tell me. You ask her, that’s all,” said the Squire, with a short, scornful laugh.
“Not coming to live in this house? Don’t even say it. Just ask her, that’s all,” said the Squire, with a brief, mocking laugh.
“I’d rather let the thing be, at present, sir,” said Godfrey. “I hope you won’t try to hurry it on by saying anything.”
“I’d rather leave it alone for now, sir,” said Godfrey. “I hope you won’t try to rush it by saying anything.”
“I shall do what I choose,” said the Squire, “and I shall let you know I’m master; else you may turn out and find an estate to drop into somewhere else. Go out and tell Winthrop not to go to Cox’s, but wait for me. And tell ’em to get my horse saddled. And stop: look out and get that hack o’ Dunsey’s sold, and hand me the money, will you? He’ll keep no more hacks at my expense. And if you know where he’s sneaking—I daresay you do—you may tell him to spare himself the journey o’ coming back home. Let him turn ostler, and keep himself. He shan’t hang on me any more.”
“I’ll do what I want,” said the Squire, “and I’ll make sure you know I’m in charge; otherwise, you can just pack up and find another estate to settle into. Go out and tell Winthrop not to go to Cox’s, but to wait for me. And tell them to get my horse saddled. And one more thing: make sure to sell that old hack of Dunsey’s and give me the money, okay? He’s not keeping any more hacks at my expense. And if you know where he’s hiding—I bet you do—you can tell him to save himself the trip back home. Let him work as a stablehand and take care of himself. He won’t be depending on me anymore.”
“I don’t know where he is, sir; and if I did, it isn’t my place to tell him to keep away,” said Godfrey, moving towards the door.
“I don’t know where he is, sir; and even if I did, it’s not my place to tell him to stay away,” said Godfrey, stepping toward the door.
“Confound it, sir, don’t stay arguing, but go and order my horse,” said the Squire, taking up a pipe.
"Dammit, sir, stop arguing and just go get my horse," said the Squire, picking up a pipe.
Godfrey left the room, hardly knowing whether he were more relieved by the sense that the interview was ended without having made any change in his position, or more uneasy that he had entangled himself still further in prevarication and deceit. What had passed about his proposing to Nancy had raised a new alarm, lest by some after-dinner words of his father’s to Mr. Lammeter he should be thrown into the embarrassment of being obliged absolutely to decline her when she seemed to be within his reach. He fled to his usual refuge, that of hoping for some unforeseen turn of fortune, some favourable chance which would save him from unpleasant consequences—perhaps even justify his insincerity by manifesting its prudence. And in this point of trusting to some throw of fortune’s dice, Godfrey can hardly be called specially old-fashioned. Favourable Chance, I fancy, is the god of all men who follow their own devices instead of obeying a law they believe in. Let even a polished man of these days get into a position he is ashamed to avow, and his mind will be bent on all the possible issues that may deliver him from the calculable results of that position. Let him live outside his income, or shirk the resolute honest work that brings wages, and he will presently find himself dreaming of a possible benefactor, a possible simpleton who may be cajoled into using his interest, a possible state of mind in some possible person not yet forthcoming. Let him neglect the responsibilities of his office, and he will inevitably anchor himself on the chance that the thing left undone may turn out not to be of the supposed importance. Let him betray his friend’s confidence, and he will adore that same cunning complexity called Chance, which gives him the hope that his friend will never know. Let him forsake a decent craft that he may pursue the gentilities of a profession to which nature never called him, and his religion will infallibly be the worship of blessed Chance, which he will believe in as the mighty creator of success. The evil principle deprecated in that religion is the orderly sequence by which the seed brings forth a crop after its kind.
Godfrey left the room, hardly sure whether he felt more relieved that the interview was over without changing his situation, or more anxious that he had only tangled himself deeper in lies and deceit. What had happened regarding his proposal to Nancy had raised new fears that some comments from his father to Mr. Lammeter after dinner could put him in the awkward position of having to turn her down when she seemed within his reach. He rushed to his usual escape, hoping for some unexpected turn of fate, some lucky break that would save him from unpleasant consequences—maybe even justify his dishonesty by showing it was smart. In this reliance on a twist of luck, Godfrey isn't particularly old-fashioned. I suspect Favorable Chance is the deity worshipped by those who pursue their own desires rather than adhering to a belief in a guiding principle. Even an educated person today, when faced with a situation they’re embarrassed about, will fixate on every possible outcome that might release them from the inevitable consequences of that situation. If he spends beyond his means or avoids the honest work that pays the bills, he'll start dreaming of a potential benefactor, a gullible person he could manipulate into using their influence, or an imagined state of mind in someone yet to appear. If he neglects his job responsibilities, he'll subconsciously cling to the hope that what he left undone won’t be as important as he thought. If he betrays a friend's trust, he’ll admire that same deceptive concept called Chance, which gives him hope that his friend will never find out. If he abandons a respectable trade to chase the status of a profession he’s not suited for, he’ll inevitably worship the blessed Chance, believing it to be the powerful source of his success. The negative aspect criticized in that belief system is the orderly process by which a seed produces a crop of its own kind.
CHAPTER X.
Justice Malam was naturally regarded in Tarley and Raveloe as a man of capacious mind, seeing that he could draw much wider conclusions without evidence than could be expected of his neighbours who were not on the Commission of the Peace. Such a man was not likely to neglect the clue of the tinder-box, and an inquiry was set on foot concerning a pedlar, name unknown, with curly black hair and a foreign complexion, carrying a box of cutlery and jewellery, and wearing large rings in his ears. But either because inquiry was too slow-footed to overtake him, or because the description applied to so many pedlars that inquiry did not know how to choose among them, weeks passed away, and there was no other result concerning the robbery than a gradual cessation of the excitement it had caused in Raveloe. Dunstan Cass’s absence was hardly a subject of remark: he had once before had a quarrel with his father, and had gone off, nobody knew whither, to return at the end of six weeks, take up his old quarters unforbidden, and swagger as usual. His own family, who equally expected this issue, with the sole difference that the Squire was determined this time to forbid him the old quarters, never mentioned his absence; and when his uncle Kimble or Mr. Osgood noticed it, the story of his having killed Wildfire, and committed some offence against his father, was enough to prevent surprise. To connect the fact of Dunsey’s disappearance with that of the robbery occurring on the same day, lay quite away from the track of every one’s thought—even Godfrey’s, who had better reason than any one else to know what his brother was capable of. He remembered no mention of the weaver between them since the time, twelve years ago, when it was their boyish sport to deride him; and, besides, his imagination constantly created an alibi for Dunstan: he saw him continually in some congenial haunt, to which he had walked off on leaving Wildfire—saw him sponging on chance acquaintances, and meditating a return home to the old amusement of tormenting his elder brother. Even if any brain in Raveloe had put the said two facts together, I doubt whether a combination so injurious to the prescriptive respectability of a family with a mural monument and venerable tankards, would not have been suppressed as of unsound tendency. But Christmas puddings, brawn, and abundance of spirituous liquors, throwing the mental originality into the channel of nightmare, are great preservatives against a dangerous spontaneity of waking thought.
Justice Malam was viewed in Tarley and Raveloe as a man with a broad mind, since he could make much wider conclusions without evidence than could be expected from his neighbors who weren’t on the Commission of the Peace. Such a person wasn’t likely to overlook the clue of the tinder-box, and an investigation was launched regarding a pedlar, name unknown, with curly black hair and a foreign look, carrying a box of cutlery and jewelry, and wearing large earrings. But whether it was because the inquiry was too slow to catch up with him or because the description fit many pedlars, making it hard to narrow down, weeks went by without any new information about the robbery, other than a gradual fading of the excitement it had stirred in Raveloe. Dunstan Cass’s absence was hardly noticed: he had previously quarreled with his father, vanished without a trace, and returned after six weeks, resuming his old life without challenge and acting as usual. His family, who anticipated this outcome—with the only difference being that the Squire was determined this time to deny him his old quarters—never mentioned his absence; and when his uncle Kimble or Mr. Osgood brought it up, the story of him having killed Wildfire and committing some offense against his father was enough to avoid any surprise. Connecting Dunsey’s disappearance with the robbery occurring on the same day didn’t even cross anyone’s mind—even Godfrey’s, who had more reason than anyone else to know what his brother was capable of. He couldn’t recall any mention of the weaver between them since the time, twelve years ago, when they used to mock him as kids; and besides, his imagination constantly created an alibi for Dunstan: he envisioned him in some familiar hangout, having walked off after leaving Wildfire—seeing him sponging off chance acquaintances and planning a return home to resume his old habit of tormenting his older brother. Even if anyone in Raveloe had put those two facts together, I doubt that a connection so damaging to the respected image of a family with a mural monument and ancient tankards would have been acknowledged, as it would seem too harmful. But Christmas puddings, brawn, and plenty of alcoholic drinks, pushing the mind into a state of nightmare, do a great job of preventing any dangerous spontaneity of waking thoughts.
When the robbery was talked of at the Rainbow and elsewhere, in good company, the balance continued to waver between the rational explanation founded on the tinder-box, and the theory of an impenetrable mystery that mocked investigation. The advocates of the tinder-box-and-pedlar view considered the other side a muddle-headed and credulous set, who, because they themselves were wall-eyed, supposed everybody else to have the same blank outlook; and the adherents of the inexplicable more than hinted that their antagonists were animals inclined to crow before they had found any corn—mere skimming-dishes in point of depth—whose clear-sightedness consisted in supposing there was nothing behind a barn-door because they couldn’t see through it; so that, though their controversy did not serve to elicit the fact concerning the robbery, it elicited some true opinions of collateral importance.
When people talked about the robbery at the Rainbow and other places, in decent company, the balance kept shifting between a logical explanation based on the tinder-box and a theory of an unsolvable mystery that mocked any investigation. Supporters of the tinder-box-and-pedlar idea viewed the other side as confused and gullible, who, because they were narrow-minded, assumed everyone else shared their limited perspective; meanwhile, those who believed in the inexplicable suggested that their opponents were just eager to claim victory before even finding the evidence—shallow thinkers whose so-called insight was based on the mistaken belief that there was nothing behind a barn door just because they couldn’t see through it. So, while their debate didn’t reveal the truth about the robbery, it did bring out some valid opinions on related matters.
But while poor Silas’s loss served thus to brush the slow current of Raveloe conversation, Silas himself was feeling the withering desolation of that bereavement about which his neighbours were arguing at their ease. To any one who had observed him before he lost his gold, it might have seemed that so withered and shrunken a life as his could hardly be susceptible of a bruise, could hardly endure any subtraction but such as would put an end to it altogether. But in reality it had been an eager life, filled with immediate purpose which fenced him in from the wide, cheerless unknown. It had been a clinging life; and though the object round which its fibres had clung was a dead disrupted thing, it satisfied the need for clinging. But now the fence was broken down—the support was snatched away. Marner’s thoughts could no longer move in their old round, and were baffled by a blank like that which meets a plodding ant when the earth has broken away on its homeward path. The loom was there, and the weaving, and the growing pattern in the cloth; but the bright treasure in the hole under his feet was gone; the prospect of handling and counting it was gone: the evening had no phantasm of delight to still the poor soul’s craving. The thought of the money he would get by his actual work could bring no joy, for its meagre image was only a fresh reminder of his loss; and hope was too heavily crushed by the sudden blow for his imagination to dwell on the growth of a new hoard from that small beginning.
But while poor Silas’s loss stirred up the slow chatter of Raveloe, Silas himself was experiencing the crushing emptiness of the loss that his neighbors were discussing so casually. To anyone who had seen him before he lost his gold, it might have seemed that his withered and shrunken life could hardly be hurt, could barely withstand any loss that wouldn’t end it completely. But in reality, it had been an engaged life, filled with a clear purpose that kept him away from the wide, bleak unknown. It had been a life of attachment; and although the object he clung to was now a lifeless, broken thing, it had satisfied his need to hold on. But now the barrier was down—the support was gone. Marner’s thoughts could no longer follow their old path and were confronted with a blankness like what a determined ant faces when the ground crumbles away on its way home. The loom was still there, the weaving was still happening, and the growing pattern in the cloth was still unfolding; but the bright treasure in the hole under his feet was gone; the possibility of handling and counting it was gone: the evening offered no fantasy of joy to soothe the poor soul's longing. The thought of the money he would earn from his actual work brought him no joy, as its meager image was only a painful reminder of what he had lost; and hope was too heavily crushed by the sudden blow for him to imagine building a new fortune from that small beginning.
He filled up the blank with grief. As he sat weaving, he every now and then moaned low, like one in pain: it was the sign that his thoughts had come round again to the sudden chasm—to the empty evening-time. And all the evening, as he sat in his loneliness by his dull fire, he leaned his elbows on his knees, and clasped his head with his hands, and moaned very low—not as one who seeks to be heard.
He filled the emptiness with sadness. While he sat weaving, he occasionally let out a quiet moan, like someone in pain: it was a sign that his thoughts had drifted back to the sudden emptiness—to the lonely evening hours. All evening, as he sat alone by his dull fire, he rested his elbows on his knees, cradled his head in his hands, and moaned softly—not as if he wanted to be heard.
And yet he was not utterly forsaken in his trouble. The repulsion Marner had always created in his neighbours was partly dissipated by the new light in which this misfortune had shown him. Instead of a man who had more cunning than honest folks could come by, and, what was worse, had not the inclination to use that cunning in a neighbourly way, it was now apparent that Silas had not cunning enough to keep his own. He was generally spoken of as a “poor mushed creatur”; and that avoidance of his neighbours, which had before been referred to his ill-will and to a probable addiction to worse company, was now considered mere craziness.
And yet he wasn't completely alone in his trouble. The dislike Marner had always faced from his neighbors was somewhat eased by the new perspective this misfortune had given them. Instead of seeing him as a man who had more cleverness than honest people typically possessed, and, worse, someone who didn't use that cleverness in a friendly way, it became clear that Silas simply didn't have enough smarts to hold onto what was his. He was often referred to as a "poor, unfortunate soul"; and the distance he kept from his neighbors, which had previously been blamed on his bad attitude and a possible connection to worse influences, was now viewed as mere eccentricity.
This change to a kindlier feeling was shown in various ways. The odour of Christmas cooking being on the wind, it was the season when superfluous pork and black puddings are suggestive of charity in well-to-do families; and Silas’s misfortune had brought him uppermost in the memory of housekeepers like Mrs. Osgood. Mr. Crackenthorp, too, while he admonished Silas that his money had probably been taken from him because he thought too much of it and never came to church, enforced the doctrine by a present of pigs’ pettitoes, well calculated to dissipate unfounded prejudices against the clerical character. Neighbours who had nothing but verbal consolation to give showed a disposition not only to greet Silas and discuss his misfortune at some length when they encountered him in the village, but also to take the trouble of calling at his cottage and getting him to repeat all the details on the very spot; and then they would try to cheer him by saying, “Well, Master Marner, you’re no worse off nor other poor folks, after all; and if you was to be crippled, the parish ’ud give you a ’lowance.”
This shift to a more compassionate attitude was evident in several ways. With the smell of Christmas cooking in the air, it was that time of year when extra pork and black puddings reminded wealthier families to be charitable; Silas’s troubles had made him more prominent in the thoughts of housekeepers like Mrs. Osgood. Mr. Crackenthorp, while he reprimanded Silas for possibly losing his money because he valued it too highly and never attended church, also reinforced his point by gifting him some pig's feet, which were meant to break down any unfair stereotypes about clergy. Neighbors who could only offer kind words showed a willingness not only to greet Silas and talk about his misfortune at length when they saw him in town, but they also took the time to visit his cottage and ask him to recount all the details right there; then they would try to lift his spirits by saying, “Well, Master Marner, you’re no worse off than other poor folks, after all; and if you were injured, the parish would give you an allowance.”
I suppose one reason why we are seldom able to comfort our neighbours with our words is that our goodwill gets adulterated, in spite of ourselves, before it can pass our lips. We can send black puddings and pettitoes without giving them a flavour of our own egoism; but language is a stream that is almost sure to smack of a mingled soil. There was a fair proportion of kindness in Raveloe; but it was often of a beery and bungling sort, and took the shape least allied to the complimentary and hypocritical.
I think one reason we rarely manage to comfort our neighbors with our words is that our good intentions get muddied, despite our best efforts, before we can express them. We can send sausages and hearty dishes without adding a taste of our own selfishness, but language is a medium that’s almost guaranteed to reflect a mix of influences. There was a fair amount of kindness in Raveloe; however, it often came off as clumsy and a bit tipsy, and it rarely resembled anything flattering or insincere.
Mr. Macey, for example, coming one evening expressly to let Silas know that recent events had given him the advantage of standing more favourably in the opinion of a man whose judgment was not formed lightly, opened the conversation by saying, as soon as he had seated himself and adjusted his thumbs—
Mr. Macey, for example, came one evening specifically to let Silas know that recent events had improved how a certain man viewed him, a man whose judgment wasn't taken lightly. He started the conversation by saying, as soon as he sat down and adjusted his thumbs—
“Come, Master Marner, why, you’ve no call to sit a-moaning. You’re a deal better off to ha’ lost your money, nor to ha’ kep it by foul means. I used to think, when you first come into these parts, as you were no better nor you should be; you were younger a deal than what you are now; but you were allays a staring, white-faced creatur, partly like a bald-faced calf, as I may say. But there’s no knowing: it isn’t every queer-looksed thing as Old Harry’s had the making of—I mean, speaking o’ toads and such; for they’re often harmless, like, and useful against varmin. And it’s pretty much the same wi’ you, as fur as I can see. Though as to the yarbs and stuff to cure the breathing, if you brought that sort o’ knowledge from distant parts, you might ha’ been a bit freer of it. And if the knowledge wasn’t well come by, why, you might ha’ made up for it by coming to church reg’lar; for, as for the children as the Wise Woman charmed, I’ve been at the christening of ’em again and again, and they took the water just as well. And that’s reasonable; for if Old Harry’s a mind to do a bit o’ kindness for a holiday, like, who’s got anything against it? That’s my thinking; and I’ve been clerk o’ this parish forty year, and I know, when the parson and me does the cussing of a Ash Wednesday, there’s no cussing o’ folks as have a mind to be cured without a doctor, let Kimble say what he will. And so, Master Marner, as I was saying—for there’s windings i’ things as they may carry you to the fur end o’ the prayer-book afore you get back to ’em—my advice is, as you keep up your sperrits; for as for thinking you’re a deep un, and ha’ got more inside you nor ’ull bear daylight, I’m not o’ that opinion at all, and so I tell the neighbours. For, says I, you talk o’ Master Marner making out a tale—why, it’s nonsense, that is: it ’ud take a ’cute man to make a tale like that; and, says I, he looked as scared as a rabbit.”
“Come on, Master Marner, there’s no need to sit around moaning. You’re much better off having lost your money than keeping it through dishonest means. I used to think, when you first came to this area, that you were no better than you should be; you were much younger than you are now, but you always looked like a scared, pale creature, kind of like a bald-faced calf, if I may say so. But you never know: not everything that looks odd is made by Old Harry—I mean, when talking about toads and such; those can often be harmless and even helpful against pests. It’s pretty much the same with you, as far as I can see. Though if you have herbal knowledge to cure breathing problems from far away, you might have been a bit better off. And if that knowledge wasn’t well-earned, then you could have made up for it by coming to church regularly; because, as for the children that the Wise Woman charmed, I’ve been at their christenings again and again, and they took the water just fine. And that’s reasonable; if Old Harry feels like doing something nice for a change, who’s to complain? That’s what I think; I’ve been the clerk of this parish for forty years, and I know that when the parson and I perform the cursing on Ash Wednesday, we don’t curse folks who want to get better without a doctor, no matter what Kimble says. So, Master Marner, as I was saying—because there are twists in things that could take you to the very end of the prayer book before you get back to them—my advice is to keep your spirits up; as for thinking you’re some deep person with more inside you than you can show in daylight, I don’t believe that at all, and I tell the neighbors the same. Because, I say, you talk about Master Marner making up a story—well, that’s nonsense: it would take a clever person to create a tale like that; and I say, he looked as scared as a rabbit.”
During this discursive address Silas had continued motionless in his previous attitude, leaning his elbows on his knees, and pressing his hands against his head. Mr. Macey, not doubting that he had been listened to, paused, in the expectation of some appreciatory reply, but Marner remained silent. He had a sense that the old man meant to be good-natured and neighbourly; but the kindness fell on him as sunshine falls on the wretched—he had no heart to taste it, and felt that it was very far off him.
During this talk, Silas stayed completely still in his previous position, resting his elbows on his knees and pressing his hands against his head. Mr. Macey, confident that Silas had been listening, paused, expecting some kind of appreciative response, but Marner remained quiet. He sensed that the old man was trying to be kind and friendly; however, the kindness hit him like sunshine hits the miserable—he had no heart to enjoy it and felt it was very distant from him.
“Come, Master Marner, have you got nothing to say to that?” said Mr. Macey at last, with a slight accent of impatience.
“Come on, Master Marner, don’t you have anything to say about that?” Mr. Macey finally said, with a hint of impatience.
“Oh,” said Marner, slowly, shaking his head between his hands, “I thank you—thank you—kindly.”
“Oh,” Marner said slowly, shaking his head with his hands, “I really appreciate it—thank you—so much.”
“Aye, aye, to be sure: I thought you would,” said Mr. Macey; “and my advice is—have you got a Sunday suit?”
“Aye, aye, for sure: I thought you would,” said Mr. Macey; “and my advice is—do you have a Sunday suit?”
“No,” said Marner.
“No,” Marner said.
“I doubted it was so,” said Mr. Macey. “Now, let me advise you to get a Sunday suit: there’s Tookey, he’s a poor creatur, but he’s got my tailoring business, and some o’ my money in it, and he shall make a suit at a low price, and give you trust, and then you can come to church, and be a bit neighbourly. Why, you’ve never heared me say ‘Amen’ since you come into these parts, and I recommend you to lose no time, for it’ll be poor work when Tookey has it all to himself, for I mayn’t be equil to stand i’ the desk at all, come another winter.” Here Mr. Macey paused, perhaps expecting some sign of emotion in his hearer; but not observing any, he went on. “And as for the money for the suit o’ clothes, why, you get a matter of a pound a-week at your weaving, Master Marner, and you’re a young man, eh, for all you look so mushed. Why, you couldn’t ha’ been five-and-twenty when you come into these parts, eh?”
“I doubt that’s true,” said Mr. Macey. “Now, let me suggest you get a Sunday suit: there’s Tookey, he’s a poor guy, but he’s got my tailoring business and some of my money in it, and he’ll make you a suit at a low price and give you credit, so you can come to church and be a bit friendly. You know, you’ve never heard me say ‘Amen’ since you arrived here, and I advise you to act fast, because it’ll be tough when Tookey has it all to himself, since I might not be able to stand at the desk at all come another winter.” Here Mr. Macey paused, perhaps expecting some sign of emotion from his listener; but seeing none, he continued. “And as for the money for the suit, well, you earn about a pound a week at your weaving, Master Marner, and you’re a young man, right, even if you look so worn out. You can’t have been more than twenty-five when you got here, can you?”
Silas started a little at the change to a questioning tone, and answered mildly, “I don’t know; I can’t rightly say—it’s a long while since.”
Silas flinched a bit at the shift to a questioning tone and replied calmly, “I don't know; I can't really say—it's been a long time since.”
After receiving such an answer as this, it is not surprising that Mr. Macey observed, later on in the evening at the Rainbow, that Marner’s head was “all of a muddle,” and that it was to be doubted if he ever knew when Sunday came round, which showed him a worse heathen than many a dog.
After getting an answer like that, it’s no wonder Mr. Macey noted later that evening at the Rainbow that Marner’s head was “all muddled,” and it was questionable if he ever recognized when Sunday came around, making him seem more ignorant than many a dog.
Another of Silas’s comforters, besides Mr. Macey, came to him with a mind highly charged on the same topic. This was Mrs. Winthrop, the wheelwright’s wife. The inhabitants of Raveloe were not severely regular in their church-going, and perhaps there was hardly a person in the parish who would not have held that to go to church every Sunday in the calendar would have shown a greedy desire to stand well with Heaven, and get an undue advantage over their neighbours—a wish to be better than the “common run,” that would have implied a reflection on those who had had godfathers and godmothers as well as themselves, and had an equal right to the burying-service. At the same time, it was understood to be requisite for all who were not household servants, or young men, to take the sacrament at one of the great festivals: Squire Cass himself took it on Christmas-day; while those who were held to be “good livers” went to church with greater, though still with moderate, frequency.
Another of Silas’s comforters, besides Mr. Macey, approached him with a mind full of thoughts on the same topic. This was Mrs. Winthrop, the wheelwright’s wife. The residents of Raveloe weren’t very strict about going to church, and probably, there wasn’t a single person in the parish who wouldn’t have thought that attending church every Sunday would show an overly eager desire to impress Heaven and gain an unfair advantage over their neighbors—a desire to be better than the “common folks,” which would have implied criticism of those who had had godparents just like them and had the same right to the burial service. At the same time, it was generally accepted that everyone who wasn’t a household servant or a young man should take the sacrament at one of the major festivals: Squire Cass himself took it on Christmas Day; while those considered “good livers” went to church more often, though still with moderate frequency.
Mrs. Winthrop was one of these: she was in all respects a woman of scrupulous conscience, so eager for duties that life seemed to offer them too scantily unless she rose at half-past four, though this threw a scarcity of work over the more advanced hours of the morning, which it was a constant problem with her to remove. Yet she had not the vixenish temper which is sometimes supposed to be a necessary condition of such habits: she was a very mild, patient woman, whose nature it was to seek out all the sadder and more serious elements of life, and pasture her mind upon them. She was the person always first thought of in Raveloe when there was illness or death in a family, when leeches were to be applied, or there was a sudden disappointment in a monthly nurse. She was a “comfortable woman”—good-looking, fresh-complexioned, having her lips always slightly screwed, as if she felt herself in a sick-room with the doctor or the clergyman present. But she was never whimpering; no one had seen her shed tears; she was simply grave and inclined to shake her head and sigh, almost imperceptibly, like a funereal mourner who is not a relation. It seemed surprising that Ben Winthrop, who loved his quart-pot and his joke, got along so well with Dolly; but she took her husband’s jokes and joviality as patiently as everything else, considering that “men would be so,” and viewing the stronger sex in the light of animals whom it had pleased Heaven to make naturally troublesome, like bulls and turkey-cocks.
Mrs. Winthrop was one of those people: she was a woman with a very strong sense of duty and conscience, so eager to fulfill her responsibilities that life seemed to offer too few unless she got up at 4:30 AM. This, however, made it a constant challenge for her to fill the more productive hours of the morning with work. Yet, she didn’t have the fiery temperament often thought to be linked with such habits; she was a mild, patient woman who naturally gravitated towards the sadder and more serious aspects of life, finding her thoughts anchored in them. She was the first person in Raveloe that came to mind when there was illness or death in a family, when leeches needed to be applied, or when there was a last-minute issue with a monthly nurse. She was a “comfortable woman”—good-looking, with a fresh complexion, her lips often slightly pursed as if she were always in a sickroom with a doctor or clergyman present. But she never cried; no one had ever seen her shed tears. She was simply serious, inclined to shake her head and sigh almost imperceptibly, like a mourner at a funeral who isn’t a close relative. It was a bit surprising that Ben Winthrop, who enjoyed his drink and his jokes, got along so well with Dolly; but she accepted her husband’s jokes and jovial nature as patiently as she did everything else, believing that “men would be so,” and viewing the male gender as creatures whom it pleased Heaven to make naturally troublesome, like bulls and turkeys.
This good wholesome woman could hardly fail to have her mind drawn strongly towards Silas Marner, now that he appeared in the light of a sufferer; and one Sunday afternoon she took her little boy Aaron with her, and went to call on Silas, carrying in her hand some small lard-cakes, flat paste-like articles much esteemed in Raveloe. Aaron, an apple-cheeked youngster of seven, with a clean starched frill which looked like a plate for the apples, needed all his adventurous curiosity to embolden him against the possibility that the big-eyed weaver might do him some bodily injury; and his dubiety was much increased when, on arriving at the Stone-pits, they heard the mysterious sound of the loom.
This kind-hearted woman couldn't help but feel strongly drawn to Silas Marner now that he was seen as someone who had suffered. One Sunday afternoon, she took her little boy Aaron with her to visit Silas, bringing along some small lard cakes, which were flat, dough-like treats highly regarded in Raveloe. Aaron, a rosy-cheeked seven-year-old with a clean starched frill that resembled a plate for apples, had to muster all his adventurous curiosity to overcome his fear that the big-eyed weaver might harm him. His uncertainty grew when, upon arriving at the Stone-pits, they heard the mysterious sound of the loom.
“Ah, it is as I thought,” said Mrs. Winthrop, sadly.
“Ah, I was right,” said Mrs. Winthrop, sadly.
They had to knock loudly before Silas heard them; but when he did come to the door he showed no impatience, as he would once have done, at a visit that had been unasked for and unexpected. Formerly, his heart had been as a locked casket with its treasure inside; but now the casket was empty, and the lock was broken. Left groping in darkness, with his prop utterly gone, Silas had inevitably a sense, though a dull and half-despairing one, that if any help came to him it must come from without; and there was a slight stirring of expectation at the sight of his fellow-men, a faint consciousness of dependence on their goodwill. He opened the door wide to admit Dolly, but without otherwise returning her greeting than by moving the armchair a few inches as a sign that she was to sit down in it. Dolly, as soon as she was seated, removed the white cloth that covered her lard-cakes, and said in her gravest way—
They had to knock loudly before Silas heard them; but when he did come to the door, he showed no impatience, as he once would have at an unexpected visit. In the past, his heart had been like a locked chest holding treasure; now the chest was empty, and the lock was broken. Left stumbling in the dark, with his support completely gone, Silas felt a dull, half-hopeless sense that if any help came to him, it would have to come from outside; and he felt a slight sense of hope at seeing other people, a faint awareness of needing their kindness. He opened the door wide to let Dolly in but didn’t greet her otherwise, just moved the armchair a few inches as a signal for her to sit down. Once Dolly was seated, she took off the white cloth that covered her lard cakes and said in her most serious tone—
“I’d a baking yisterday, Master Marner, and the lard-cakes turned out better nor common, and I’d ha’ asked you to accept some, if you’d thought well. I don’t eat such things myself, for a bit o’ bread’s what I like from one year’s end to the other; but men’s stomichs are made so comical, they want a change—they do, I know, God help ’em.”
"I baked yesterday, Master Marner, and the lard cakes turned out better than usual. I would have asked you to take some if you were interested. I don’t eat those things myself because I prefer a piece of bread all year round; but men’s stomachs are so strange, they need variety—they really do, I know, God help them."
Dolly sighed gently as she held out the cakes to Silas, who thanked her kindly and looked very close at them, absently, being accustomed to look so at everything he took into his hand—eyed all the while by the wondering bright orbs of the small Aaron, who had made an outwork of his mother’s chair, and was peeping round from behind it.
Dolly sighed softly as she offered the cakes to Silas, who gratefully accepted and examined them closely, as he often did with anything he held—watched all the while by the curious bright eyes of little Aaron, who had turned his mother’s chair into a fort and was peeking around from behind it.
“There’s letters pricked on ’em,” said Dolly. “I can’t read ’em myself, and there’s nobody, not Mr. Macey himself, rightly knows what they mean; but they’ve a good meaning, for they’re the same as is on the pulpit-cloth at church. What are they, Aaron, my dear?”
“There are letters poked into them,” said Dolly. “I can’t read them myself, and there’s no one, not even Mr. Macey, who really knows what they mean; but they have a good meaning, because they’re the same as what's on the pulpit cloth at church. What are they, Aaron, my dear?”
Aaron retreated completely behind his outwork.
Aaron completely withdrew behind his defense.
“Oh, go, that’s naughty,” said his mother, mildly. “Well, whativer the letters are, they’ve a good meaning; and it’s a stamp as has been in our house, Ben says, ever since he was a little un, and his mother used to put it on the cakes, and I’ve allays put it on too; for if there’s any good, we’ve need of it i’ this world.”
“Oh, come on, that’s naughty,” his mother said lightly. “Well, whatever the letters mean, they have a good meaning; and it’s a stamp that’s been in our house, Ben says, ever since he was a little one, and his mother used to put it on the cakes, and I’ve always put it on too; because if there’s any good, we definitely need it in this world.”
“It’s I. H. S.,” said Silas, at which proof of learning Aaron peeped round the chair again.
“It’s I. H. S.,” said Silas, at which proof of learning Aaron peeked around the chair again.
“Well, to be sure, you can read ’em off,” said Dolly. “Ben’s read ’em to me many and many a time, but they slip out o’ my mind again; the more’s the pity, for they’re good letters, else they wouldn’t be in the church; and so I prick ’em on all the loaves and all the cakes, though sometimes they won’t hold, because o’ the rising—for, as I said, if there’s any good to be got we’ve need of it i’ this world—that we have; and I hope they’ll bring good to you, Master Marner, for it’s wi’ that will I brought you the cakes; and you see the letters have held better nor common.”
“Well, you can definitely read them off,” said Dolly. “Ben has read them to me many times, but I tend to forget them; which is a shame because they’re good letters, or they wouldn’t be in the church. So, I mark them on all the loaves and all the cakes, though sometimes they don't stick because of the rising—because, like I said, if any good can come from this world, we definitely need it. And I hope they bring good fortune to you, Master Marner, because that’s why I brought you the cakes; and you can see the letters have held up better than usual.”
Silas was as unable to interpret the letters as Dolly, but there was no possibility of misunderstanding the desire to give comfort that made itself heard in her quiet tones. He said, with more feeling than before—“Thank you—thank you kindly.” But he laid down the cakes and seated himself absently—drearily unconscious of any distinct benefit towards which the cakes and the letters, or even Dolly’s kindness, could tend for him.
Silas couldn't make sense of the letters any better than Dolly could, but he clearly understood her quiet wish to offer comfort. He said, with more emotion than before, “Thank you—thank you so much.” However, he put the cakes down and sat down absently, feeling listless and unaware of any real benefit that the cakes, the letters, or even Dolly's kindness could bring him.
“Ah, if there’s good anywhere, we’ve need of it,” repeated Dolly, who did not lightly forsake a serviceable phrase. She looked at Silas pityingly as she went on. “But you didn’t hear the church-bells this morning, Master Marner? I doubt you didn’t know it was Sunday. Living so lone here, you lose your count, I daresay; and then, when your loom makes a noise, you can’t hear the bells, more partic’lar now the frost kills the sound.”
“Ah, if there’s any goodness out there, we could really use it,” Dolly repeated, not one to easily let go of a useful phrase. She looked at Silas with sympathy as she continued, “But you didn’t hear the church bells this morning, Master Marner? I bet you didn’t realize it was Sunday. Living all alone here, you probably lose track of time; and when your loom is clattering away, you can’t hear the bells, especially now that the frost dulls the sound.”
“Yes, I did; I heard ’em,” said Silas, to whom Sunday bells were a mere accident of the day, and not part of its sacredness. There had been no bells in Lantern Yard.
“Yes, I did; I heard them,” said Silas, to whom Sunday bells were just another sound of the day and not part of its holiness. There had been no bells in Lantern Yard.
“Dear heart!” said Dolly, pausing before she spoke again. “But what a pity it is you should work of a Sunday, and not clean yourself—if you didn’t go to church; for if you’d a roasting bit, it might be as you couldn’t leave it, being a lone man. But there’s the bakehus, if you could make up your mind to spend a twopence on the oven now and then,—not every week, in course—I shouldn’t like to do that myself,—you might carry your bit o’ dinner there, for it’s nothing but right to have a bit o’ summat hot of a Sunday, and not to make it as you can’t know your dinner from Saturday. But now, upo’ Christmas-day, this blessed Christmas as is ever coming, if you was to take your dinner to the bakehus, and go to church, and see the holly and the yew, and hear the anthim, and then take the sacramen,’ you’d be a deal the better, and you’d know which end you stood on, and you could put your trust i’ Them as knows better nor we do, seein’ you’d ha’ done what it lies on us all to do.”
“Dear heart!” said Dolly, pausing before she continued. “But how unfortunate it is that you’re working on a Sunday and not cleaning up—if you didn’t go to church; because if you had a roast, it might be that you couldn’t leave it, being all by yourself. But there’s the bakery, and if you could just decide to spend a couple of pennies on the oven now and then—not every week, of course—I wouldn’t want to do that myself—you could take your dinner there. It’s only right to have something warm on a Sunday, rather than having a dinner that feels like it’s been sitting since Saturday. But now, on Christmas Day, this blessed Christmas that keeps coming, if you took your dinner to the bakery, went to church, saw the holly and yew, heard the hymn, and then took the sacrament, you’d feel so much better, you’d know where you stand, and you could trust in those who know better than we do, seeing as you’d have done what we all are supposed to do.”
Dolly’s exhortation, which was an unusually long effort of speech for her, was uttered in the soothing persuasive tone with which she would have tried to prevail on a sick man to take his medicine, or a basin of gruel for which he had no appetite. Silas had never before been closely urged on the point of his absence from church, which had only been thought of as a part of his general queerness; and he was too direct and simple to evade Dolly’s appeal.
Dolly’s long speech, which was unusual for her, was delivered in the soothing, persuasive tone she would use to convince a sick person to take their medicine or eat a bowl of gruel they didn’t want. Silas had never been directly encouraged about missing church before; it had just been seen as part of his overall strangeness. He was too straightforward and simple to dodge Dolly’s request.
“Nay, nay,” he said, “I know nothing o’ church. I’ve never been to church.”
“Nah, nah,” he said, “I don’t know anything about church. I’ve never been to church.”
“No!” said Dolly, in a low tone of wonderment. Then bethinking herself of Silas’s advent from an unknown country, she said, “Could it ha’ been as they’d no church where you was born?”
“No!” said Dolly, in a quiet tone of amazement. Then, remembering Silas’s arrival from an unknown place, she asked, “Could it be that they didn’t have a church where you were born?”
“Oh, yes,” said Silas, meditatively, sitting in his usual posture of leaning on his knees, and supporting his head. “There was churches—a many—it was a big town. But I knew nothing of ’em—I went to chapel.”
“Oh, yes,” said Silas, thoughtfully, sitting in his usual position of leaning on his knees and resting his head. “There were lots of churches—it was a big town. But I didn’t know anything about them—I went to chapel.”
Dolly was much puzzled at this new word, but she was rather afraid of inquiring further, lest “chapel” might mean some haunt of wickedness. After a little thought, she said—
Dolly was really confused by this new word, but she was a bit scared to ask more questions, in case “chapel” referred to some place of evil. After thinking for a moment, she said—
“Well, Master Marner, it’s niver too late to turn over a new leaf, and if you’ve niver had no church, there’s no telling the good it’ll do you. For I feel so set up and comfortable as niver was, when I’ve been and heard the prayers, and the singing to the praise and glory o’ God, as Mr. Macey gives out—and Mr. Crackenthorp saying good words, and more partic’lar on Sacramen’ Day; and if a bit o’ trouble comes, I feel as I can put up wi’ it, for I’ve looked for help i’ the right quarter, and gev myself up to Them as we must all give ourselves up to at the last; and if we’n done our part, it isn’t to be believed as Them as are above us ’ull be worse nor we are, and come short o’ Their’n.”
“Well, Master Marner, it’s never too late to turn over a new leaf, and if you’ve never had any church, you have no idea how much good it’ll do you. I feel so uplifted and comfortable like never before when I’ve been to hear the prayers and the singing in praise and glory of God, as Mr. Macey leads—and Mr. Crackenthorp saying good words, especially on Communion Day; and when a bit of trouble comes, I feel like I can handle it because I’ve looked for help in the right place and given myself up to Them whom we all must surrender to in the end; and if we’ve done our part, it’s hard to believe that Those above us will be worse than we are and fall short of what They owe.”
Poor Dolly’s exposition of her simple Raveloe theology fell rather unmeaningly on Silas’s ears, for there was no word in it that could rouse a memory of what he had known as religion, and his comprehension was quite baffled by the plural pronoun, which was no heresy of Dolly’s, but only her way of avoiding a presumptuous familiarity. He remained silent, not feeling inclined to assent to the part of Dolly’s speech which he fully understood—her recommendation that he should go to church. Indeed, Silas was so unaccustomed to talk beyond the brief questions and answers necessary for the transaction of his simple business, that words did not easily come to him without the urgency of a distinct purpose.
Poor Dolly’s explanation of her simple Raveloe beliefs fell rather flat on Silas’s ears, as there was nothing in it that could spark a memory of what he’d known as religion, and he was completely confused by the plural pronoun, which wasn’t Dolly’s error, but just her way of avoiding sounding presumptuous. He stayed quiet, not feeling inclined to agree with the part of Dolly’s speech that he understood—her suggestion that he should go to church. In fact, Silas was so unused to talking beyond the brief questions and answers needed for his simple business that words didn’t come easily to him without the push of a clear purpose.
But now, little Aaron, having become used to the weaver’s awful presence, had advanced to his mother’s side, and Silas, seeming to notice him for the first time, tried to return Dolly’s signs of good-will by offering the lad a bit of lard-cake. Aaron shrank back a little, and rubbed his head against his mother’s shoulder, but still thought the piece of cake worth the risk of putting his hand out for it.
But now, little Aaron, having gotten used to the weaver’s frightening presence, had moved closer to his mother, and Silas, seeming to notice him for the first time, tried to respond to Dolly’s friendly gestures by offering the boy a piece of lard cake. Aaron pulled back a bit and rubbed his head against his mother’s shoulder, but still believed the piece of cake was worth the chance of reaching out his hand for it.
“Oh, for shame, Aaron,” said his mother, taking him on her lap, however; “why, you don’t want cake again yet awhile. He’s wonderful hearty,” she went on, with a little sigh—“that he is, God knows. He’s my youngest, and we spoil him sadly, for either me or the father must allays hev him in our sight—that we must.”
“Oh, for shame, Aaron,” said his mother, pulling him onto her lap, “you don’t want cake again just yet. He’s really quite healthy,” she continued with a little sigh—“that he is, God knows. He’s my youngest, and we spoil him terribly, because one of us always has to keep him in our sight—that we do.”
She stroked Aaron’s brown head, and thought it must do Master Marner good to see such a “pictur of a child”. But Marner, on the other side of the hearth, saw the neat-featured rosy face as a mere dim round, with two dark spots in it.
She gently caressed Aaron's brown hair and thought it must be good for Master Marner to see such a "picture of a child." But Marner, sitting on the other side of the hearth, saw the well-defined, rosy face as just a fuzzy circle with two dark spots in it.
“And he’s got a voice like a bird—you wouldn’t think,” Dolly went on; “he can sing a Christmas carril as his father’s taught him; and I take it for a token as he’ll come to good, as he can learn the good tunes so quick. Come, Aaron, stan’ up and sing the carril to Master Marner, come.”
“And he's got a voice like a bird—you wouldn't believe it,” Dolly continued; “he can sing a Christmas carol like his father taught him; and I see it as a sign that he’ll turn out well, since he picks up the good tunes so quickly. Come on, Aaron, stand up and sing the carol for Master Marner, go on.”
Aaron replied by rubbing his forehead against his mother’s shoulder.
Aaron responded by resting his forehead against his mom's shoulder.
“Oh, that’s naughty,” said Dolly, gently. “Stan’ up, when mother tells you, and let me hold the cake till you’ve done.”
“Oh, that’s naughty,” Dolly said gently. “Stand up when your mom tells you to, and let me hold the cake until you’re finished.”
Aaron was not indisposed to display his talents, even to an ogre, under protecting circumstances; and after a few more signs of coyness, consisting chiefly in rubbing the backs of his hands over his eyes, and then peeping between them at Master Marner, to see if he looked anxious for the “carril,” he at length allowed his head to be duly adjusted, and standing behind the table, which let him appear above it only as far as his broad frill, so that he looked like a cherubic head untroubled with a body, he began with a clear chirp, and in a melody that had the rhythm of an industrious hammer:
Aaron was willing to show off his talents, even to an ogre, as long as the situation felt safe. After a bit more shyness, mainly rubbing his hands over his eyes and then peeking at Master Marner to check if he seemed eager for the “carril,” he finally let himself get ready. Standing behind the table, where only his wide frill was visible, he looked like a cherubic head without a body. He started with a clear chirp, singing a tune that had the beat of a hardworking hammer:
“God rest you, merry gentlemen,
Let nothing you dismay,
For Jesus Christ our Savior
Was born on Christmas-day.”
“God bless you, cheerful guys,
Let nothing bring you down,
For Jesus Christ our Savior
Was born on Christmas Day.”
Dolly listened with a devout look, glancing at Marner in some confidence that this strain would help to allure him to church.
Dolly listened with a sincere expression, looking at Marner with some hope that this appeal would persuade him to go to church.
“That’s Christmas music,” she said, when Aaron had ended, and had secured his piece of cake again. “There’s no other music equil to the Christmas music—‘Hark the erol angils sing.’ And you may judge what it is at church, Master Marner, with the bassoon and the voices, as you can’t help thinking you’ve got to a better place a’ready—for I wouldn’t speak ill o’ this world, seeing as Them put us in it as knows best—but what wi’ the drink, and the quarrelling, and the bad illnesses, and the hard dying, as I’ve seen times and times, one’s thankful to hear of a better. The boy sings pretty, don’t he, Master Marner?”
"That's Christmas music," she said, after Aaron finished and had taken his piece of cake again. "There's no music that compares to Christmas music—'Hark the herald angels sing.' And you can tell what it's like at church, Master Marner, with the bassoon and the voices, making you feel like you've already arrived at a better place—because I wouldn't speak poorly of this world, considering that those who put us here know best—but with the drinking, the fighting, the terrible illnesses, and the hard dying I've seen time and time again, one is grateful to hear about something better. The boy sings beautifully, doesn't he, Master Marner?"
“Yes,” said Silas, absently, “very pretty.”
"Yeah," said Silas, absentmindedly, "really nice."
The Christmas carol, with its hammer-like rhythm, had fallen on his ears as strange music, quite unlike a hymn, and could have none of the effect Dolly contemplated. But he wanted to show her that he was grateful, and the only mode that occurred to him was to offer Aaron a bit more cake.
The Christmas carol, with its pounding rhythm, sounded to him like strange music, completely different from a hymn, and it couldn’t have the effect Dolly imagined. But he wanted to show her that he appreciated her, and the only thing he could think of was to offer Aaron a little more cake.
“Oh, no, thank you, Master Marner,” said Dolly, holding down Aaron’s willing hands. “We must be going home now. And so I wish you good-bye, Master Marner; and if you ever feel anyways bad in your inside, as you can’t fend for yourself, I’ll come and clean up for you, and get you a bit o’ victual, and willing. But I beg and pray of you to leave off weaving of a Sunday, for it’s bad for soul and body—and the money as comes i’ that way ’ull be a bad bed to lie down on at the last, if it doesn’t fly away, nobody knows where, like the white frost. And you’ll excuse me being that free with you, Master Marner, for I wish you well—I do. Make your bow, Aaron.”
“Oh, no, thank you, Master Marner,” said Dolly, holding down Aaron’s eager hands. “We need to head home now. So, goodbye, Master Marner; if you ever feel unwell and can’t take care of yourself, I’ll come and help you clean up and bring you some food, no problem. But I kindly ask you to stop weaving on Sundays, because it’s not good for your soul or your body—and the money you make that way will be a bad thing to rely on in the end, if it doesn’t just disappear, like the white frost. And I hope you don’t mind me speaking so frankly with you, Master Marner, because I really wish you well—I do. Now, make your bow, Aaron.”
Silas said “Good-bye, and thank you kindly,” as he opened the door for Dolly, but he couldn’t help feeling relieved when she was gone—relieved that he might weave again and moan at his ease. Her simple view of life and its comforts, by which she had tried to cheer him, was only like a report of unknown objects, which his imagination could not fashion. The fountains of human love and of faith in a divine love had not yet been unlocked, and his soul was still the shrunken rivulet, with only this difference, that its little groove of sand was blocked up, and it wandered confusedly against dark obstruction.
Silas said, “Goodbye, and thank you,” as he opened the door for Dolly, but he couldn’t help but feel relieved when she left—relieved that he could weave again and sigh freely. Her straightforward view of life and its comforts, which she had tried to use to uplift him, felt like a vague report of things he couldn’t quite imagine. The sources of human love and faith in a higher love hadn’t been tapped yet, and his soul was like a shriveled stream, only now its small channel was blocked, causing it to meander chaotically against dark obstacles.
And so, notwithstanding the honest persuasions of Mr. Macey and Dolly Winthrop, Silas spent his Christmas-day in loneliness, eating his meat in sadness of heart, though the meat had come to him as a neighbourly present. In the morning he looked out on the black frost that seemed to press cruelly on every blade of grass, while the half-icy red pool shivered under the bitter wind; but towards evening the snow began to fall, and curtained from him even that dreary outlook, shutting him close up with his narrow grief. And he sat in his robbed home through the livelong evening, not caring to close his shutters or lock his door, pressing his head between his hands and moaning, till the cold grasped him and told him that his fire was grey.
So, despite the sincere efforts of Mr. Macey and Dolly Winthrop, Silas spent his Christmas Day alone, eating his meal with a heavy heart, even though the meat had been a thoughtful gift from a neighbor. In the morning, he looked out at the harsh frost that seemed to weigh down every blade of grass, while the half-frozen red pool trembled in the biting wind; but by evening, the snow started to fall, blocking even that gloomy view and isolating him with his narrow sorrow. He sat in his stripped home throughout the long evening, not bothering to close his shutters or lock his door, pressing his head between his hands and moaning until the cold reminded him that his fire had gone out.
Nobody in this world but himself knew that he was the same Silas Marner who had once loved his fellow with tender love, and trusted in an unseen goodness. Even to himself that past experience had become dim.
Nobody else in this world knew that he was the same Silas Marner who had once loved his friend deeply and believed in an unseen goodness. Even for him, that past experience had grown faint.
But in Raveloe village the bells rang merrily, and the church was fuller than all through the rest of the year, with red faces among the abundant dark-green boughs—faces prepared for a longer service than usual by an odorous breakfast of toast and ale. Those green boughs, the hymn and anthem never heard but at Christmas—even the Athanasian Creed, which was discriminated from the others only as being longer and of exceptional virtue, since it was only read on rare occasions—brought a vague exulting sense, for which the grown men could as little have found words as the children, that something great and mysterious had been done for them in heaven above and in earth below, which they were appropriating by their presence. And then the red faces made their way through the black biting frost to their own homes, feeling themselves free for the rest of the day to eat, drink, and be merry, and using that Christian freedom without diffidence.
But in Raveloe village, the bells rang joyfully, and the church was more crowded than at any other time of the year, with rosy faces among the lush dark-green branches—faces ready for a longer service than usual after a delicious breakfast of toast and ale. Those green branches, the hymns and anthems only heard at Christmas—even the Athanasian Creed, which was set apart from the others just because it was longer and considered special, since it was only read on rare occasions—created a vague, uplifting feeling, for which the grown men couldn't find words any more than the children could, that something great and mysterious had been done for them in heaven and on earth, which they were embracing by just being there. Then the rosy faces made their way through the biting black frost back to their homes, feeling free for the rest of the day to eat, drink, and be happy, enjoying that Christian freedom without hesitation.
At Squire Cass’s family party that day nobody mentioned Dunstan—nobody was sorry for his absence, or feared it would be too long. The doctor and his wife, uncle and aunt Kimble, were there, and the annual Christmas talk was carried through without any omissions, rising to the climax of Mr. Kimble’s experience when he walked the London hospitals thirty years back, together with striking professional anecdotes then gathered. Whereupon cards followed, with aunt Kimble’s annual failure to follow suit, and uncle Kimble’s irascibility concerning the odd trick which was rarely explicable to him, when it was not on his side, without a general visitation of tricks to see that they were formed on sound principles: the whole being accompanied by a strong steaming odour of spirits-and-water.
At Squire Cass’s family gathering that day, no one talked about Dunstan—no one missed him or worried about how long he would stay away. The doctor and his wife, Uncle and Aunt Kimble, were there, and the usual Christmas conversations flowed without any interruptions, reaching the highlight of Mr. Kimble’s story about his time walking through the London hospitals thirty years ago, along with some memorable professional anecdotes from that time. After that, they played cards, with Aunt Kimble once again unable to follow suit and Uncle Kimble getting grumpy about the odd trick, which he rarely understood when it wasn’t in his favor, unless he checked all the tricks to make sure they were done correctly: the whole thing was accompanied by a strong, steaming smell of whiskey and water.
But the party on Christmas-day, being a strictly family party, was not the pre-eminently brilliant celebration of the season at the Red House. It was the great dance on New Year’s Eve that made the glory of Squire Cass’s hospitality, as of his forefathers,’ time out of mind. This was the occasion when all the society of Raveloe and Tarley, whether old acquaintances separated by long rutty distances, or cooled acquaintances separated by misunderstandings concerning runaway calves, or acquaintances founded on intermittent condescension, counted on meeting and on comporting themselves with mutual appropriateness. This was the occasion on which fair dames who came on pillions sent their bandboxes before them, supplied with more than their evening costume; for the feast was not to end with a single evening, like a paltry town entertainment, where the whole supply of eatables is put on the table at once, and bedding is scanty. The Red House was provisioned as if for a siege; and as for the spare feather-beds ready to be laid on floors, they were as plentiful as might naturally be expected in a family that had killed its own geese for many generations.
But the Christmas Day party, being strictly a family gathering, wasn’t the outstanding celebration of the season at the Red House. It was the big dance on New Year's Eve that highlighted Squire Cass's hospitality, just like it had for his ancestors for generations. This was the event when everyone from Raveloe and Tarley, whether old friends who hadn’t seen each other in ages, or cooled relations separated by misunderstandings about runaway calves, or acquaintances who shared an occasional condescending attitude, looked forward to meeting and behaving appropriately towards one another. This was when lovely ladies arriving on pillions sent their boxes ahead, packed with more than just their evening attire; because the festivities weren’t going to wrap up in a single night, like a measly town event where all the food is served at once and sleeping arrangements are limited. The Red House was stocked as if preparing for a siege; and as for the extra feather beds ready to be laid on the floors, they were as abundant as one would expect in a family that had raised its own geese for many generations.
Godfrey Cass was looking forward to this New Year’s Eve with a foolish reckless longing, that made him half deaf to his importunate companion, Anxiety.
Godfrey Cass was eagerly anticipating this New Year’s Eve with a foolish, reckless desire that made him almost deaf to his persistent companion, Anxiety.
“Dunsey will be coming home soon: there will be a great blow-up, and how will you bribe his spite to silence?” said Anxiety.
“Dunsey will be coming home soon: there’s going to be a huge blow-up, and how will you bribe his anger to keep quiet?” said Anxiety.
“Oh, he won’t come home before New Year’s Eve, perhaps,” said Godfrey; “and I shall sit by Nancy then, and dance with her, and get a kind look from her in spite of herself.”
“Oh, he probably won’t be home before New Year’s Eve,” said Godfrey; “and I’ll sit with Nancy then, dance with her, and get a nice look from her despite herself.”
“But money is wanted in another quarter,” said Anxiety, in a louder voice, “and how will you get it without selling your mother’s diamond pin? And if you don’t get it...?”
“But money is needed elsewhere,” said Anxiety, raising her voice, “and how will you manage to get it without selling your mother’s diamond pin? And if you don’t get it...?”
“Well, but something may happen to make things easier. At any rate, there’s one pleasure for me close at hand: Nancy is coming.”
“Well, something might happen to make things easier. In any case, there’s one pleasure for me right now: Nancy is coming.”
“Yes, and suppose your father should bring matters to a pass that will oblige you to decline marrying her—and to give your reasons?”
“Yes, and what if your dad puts you in a situation where you have to say no to marrying her—and explain why?”
“Hold your tongue, and don’t worry me. I can see Nancy’s eyes, just as they will look at me, and feel her hand in mine already.”
“Be quiet and don’t stress me out. I can see how Nancy’s eyes will look at me and feel her hand in mine already.”
But Anxiety went on, though in noisy Christmas company; refusing to be utterly quieted even by much drinking.
But Anxiety continued, even in the loud Christmas gathering; refusing to be completely silenced despite all the drinking.
CHAPTER XI.
Some women, I grant, would not appear to advantage seated on a pillion, and attired in a drab joseph and a drab beaver-bonnet, with a crown resembling a small stew-pan; for a garment suggesting a coachman’s greatcoat, cut out under an exiguity of cloth that would only allow of miniature capes, is not well adapted to conceal deficiencies of contour, nor is drab a colour that will throw sallow cheeks into lively contrast. It was all the greater triumph to Miss Nancy Lammeter’s beauty that she looked thoroughly bewitching in that costume, as, seated on the pillion behind her tall, erect father, she held one arm round him, and looked down, with open-eyed anxiety, at the treacherous snow-covered pools and puddles, which sent up formidable splashings of mud under the stamp of Dobbin’s foot. A painter would, perhaps, have preferred her in those moments when she was free from self-consciousness; but certainly the bloom on her cheeks was at its highest point of contrast with the surrounding drab when she arrived at the door of the Red House, and saw Mr. Godfrey Cass ready to lift her from the pillion. She wished her sister Priscilla had come up at the same time behind the servant, for then she would have contrived that Mr. Godfrey should have lifted off Priscilla first, and, in the meantime, she would have persuaded her father to go round to the horse-block instead of alighting at the door-steps. It was very painful, when you had made it quite clear to a young man that you were determined not to marry him, however much he might wish it, that he would still continue to pay you marked attentions; besides, why didn’t he always show the same attentions, if he meant them sincerely, instead of being so strange as Mr. Godfrey Cass was, sometimes behaving as if he didn’t want to speak to her, and taking no notice of her for weeks and weeks, and then, all on a sudden, almost making love again? Moreover, it was quite plain he had no real love for her, else he would not let people have that to say of him which they did say. Did he suppose that Miss Nancy Lammeter was to be won by any man, squire or no squire, who led a bad life? That was not what she had been used to see in her own father, who was the soberest and best man in that country-side, only a little hot and hasty now and then, if things were not done to the minute.
Some women, I’ll admit, wouldn’t look great sitting on a pillion, dressed in a dull-colored coat and a matching beaver hat that looked like a small stew pot; after all, a coat that reminded you of a driver’s greatcoat, made from a scant amount of fabric that only allowed for tiny capes, doesn’t do much to hide figure flaws, and drab isn’t a color that makes pale skin pop. It was an even greater triumph for Miss Nancy Lammeter’s beauty that she looked utterly captivating in that outfit as she sat on the pillion behind her tall, straight father, one arm wrapped around him, looking down with wide-eyed worry at the tricky snow-covered puddles that splashed mud up under Dobbin’s hooves. A painter might have preferred her in those moments when she felt less self-conscious; but surely the glow on her cheeks contrasted sharply with the surrounding drab when she reached the Red House door and saw Mr. Godfrey Cass ready to help her off the pillion. She wished her sister Priscilla had arrived at the same time behind the servant because then she could have arranged for Mr. Godfrey to help Priscilla off first, while she could have convinced her father to go around to the mounting block instead of getting down at the front steps. It was very frustrating, having made it clear to a young man that she was set on not marrying him, regardless of his feelings, that he would still shower her with noticeable attention; besides, why didn’t he always show her the same level of interest if he meant it, instead of being so inconsistent like Mr. Godfrey Cass, sometimes acting like he didn’t want to talk to her, ignoring her for weeks, and then suddenly, almost acting like he was in love again? Moreover, it was obvious he didn’t truly love her, otherwise he wouldn’t let people say that about him. Did he really think Miss Nancy Lammeter could be won over by any man, squire or not, who lived a reckless life? That wasn’t what she had seen in her own father, who was the most decent and upright man in the area, just a little quick-tempered at times if things weren’t done just right.
All these thoughts rushed through Miss Nancy’s mind, in their habitual succession, in the moments between her first sight of Mr. Godfrey Cass standing at the door and her own arrival there. Happily, the Squire came out too and gave a loud greeting to her father, so that, somehow, under cover of this noise she seemed to find concealment for her confusion and neglect of any suitably formal behaviour, while she was being lifted from the pillion by strong arms which seemed to find her ridiculously small and light. And there was the best reason for hastening into the house at once, since the snow was beginning to fall again, threatening an unpleasant journey for such guests as were still on the road. These were a small minority; for already the afternoon was beginning to decline, and there would not be too much time for the ladies who came from a distance to attire themselves in readiness for the early tea which was to inspirit them for the dance.
All these thoughts rushed through Miss Nancy’s mind, in their usual order, in the moments between her first sight of Mr. Godfrey Cass standing at the door and her own arrival there. Fortunately, the Squire came out too and greeted her father loudly, so that, somehow, amid this noise, she felt a bit hidden in her confusion and lack of any formal behavior, while strong arms lifted her from the pillion, making her feel ridiculously small and light. There was a good reason to hurry into the house, as the snow was starting to fall again, threatening a difficult journey for any guests still on the road. This was a small number, since the afternoon was already starting to fade, and there wouldn’t be much time for the ladies coming from afar to get ready for the early tea that was meant to energize them for the dance.
There was a buzz of voices through the house, as Miss Nancy entered, mingled with the scrape of a fiddle preluding in the kitchen; but the Lammeters were guests whose arrival had evidently been thought of so much that it had been watched for from the windows, for Mrs. Kimble, who did the honours at the Red House on these great occasions, came forward to meet Miss Nancy in the hall, and conduct her up-stairs. Mrs. Kimble was the Squire’s sister, as well as the doctor’s wife—a double dignity, with which her diameter was in direct proportion; so that, a journey up-stairs being rather fatiguing to her, she did not oppose Miss Nancy’s request to be allowed to find her way alone to the Blue Room, where the Miss Lammeters’ bandboxes had been deposited on their arrival in the morning.
There was a hum of voices throughout the house as Miss Nancy walked in, blended with the sound of a fiddle warming up in the kitchen. The Lammeters were guests whose arrival had clearly been anticipated, as Mrs. Kimble, who hosted at the Red House during these important events, stepped forward to greet Miss Nancy in the hallway and guide her upstairs. Mrs. Kimble was not only the Squire’s sister but also the doctor’s wife, a status that seemed to match her larger-than-life presence. Since going upstairs was a bit tiring for her, she happily accepted Miss Nancy’s wish to make her own way to the Blue Room, where the Miss Lammeters’ bandboxes had been placed when they arrived that morning.
There was hardly a bedroom in the house where feminine compliments were not passing and feminine toilettes going forward, in various stages, in space made scanty by extra beds spread upon the floor; and Miss Nancy, as she entered the Blue Room, had to make her little formal curtsy to a group of six. On the one hand, there were ladies no less important than the two Miss Gunns, the wine merchant’s daughters from Lytherly, dressed in the height of fashion, with the tightest skirts and the shortest waists, and gazed at by Miss Ladbrook (of the Old Pastures) with a shyness not unsustained by inward criticism. Partly, Miss Ladbrook felt that her own skirt must be regarded as unduly lax by the Miss Gunns, and partly, that it was a pity the Miss Gunns did not show that judgment which she herself would show if she were in their place, by stopping a little on this side of the fashion. On the other hand, Mrs. Ladbrook was standing in skull-cap and front, with her turban in her hand, curtsying and smiling blandly and saying, “After you, ma’am,” to another lady in similar circumstances, who had politely offered the precedence at the looking-glass.
There was barely a bedroom in the house where compliments among women weren’t being exchanged and where feminine preparations weren’t taking place in the limited space occupied by extra beds spread across the floor. As Miss Nancy walked into the Blue Room, she had to give a little formal curtsy to a group of six. On one side were ladies just as important as the two Miss Gunns, the wine merchant's daughters from Lytherly, who were dressed in the latest fashion, with the tightest skirts and the shortest waists. Miss Ladbrook (from the Old Pastures) watched them with a shyness that was partly mixed with self-doubt. She felt that her own skirt must seem too loose to the Miss Gunns and that it was unfortunate that they didn't have the same discernment she would have shown if she were in their shoes by holding back just a bit from the extremes of fashion. On the other side, Mrs. Ladbrook was standing in her skull cap and front, holding her turban, curtsying and smiling pleasantly, saying, “After you, ma’am,” to another lady in a similar situation who had politely given her the priority at the mirror.
But Miss Nancy had no sooner made her curtsy than an elderly lady came forward, whose full white muslin kerchief, and mob-cap round her curls of smooth grey hair, were in daring contrast with the puffed yellow satins and top-knotted caps of her neighbours. She approached Miss Nancy with much primness, and said, with a slow, treble suavity—
But Miss Nancy had barely finished her curtsy when an older woman stepped forward, wearing a full white muslin kerchief and a mob cap over her smooth gray curls, which boldly contrasted with the puffy yellow satins and fancy caps of the women around her. She walked up to Miss Nancy with a lot of formality and said, in a slow, high-pitched, smooth voice—
“Niece, I hope I see you well in health.” Miss Nancy kissed her aunt’s cheek dutifully, and answered, with the same sort of amiable primness, “Quite well, I thank you, aunt; and I hope I see you the same.”
“Niece, I hope you’re doing well.” Miss Nancy kissed her aunt’s cheek politely and replied, with the same kind of pleasant formality, “I’m quite well, thank you, aunt; and I hope you’re the same.”
“Thank you, niece; I keep my health for the present. And how is my brother-in-law?”
“Thank you, niece; I'm doing well for now. And how is my brother-in-law?”
These dutiful questions and answers were continued until it was ascertained in detail that the Lammeters were all as well as usual, and the Osgoods likewise, also that niece Priscilla must certainly arrive shortly, and that travelling on pillions in snowy weather was unpleasant, though a joseph was a great protection. Then Nancy was formally introduced to her aunt’s visitors, the Miss Gunns, as being the daughters of a mother known to their mother, though now for the first time induced to make a journey into these parts; and these ladies were so taken by surprise at finding such a lovely face and figure in an out-of-the-way country place, that they began to feel some curiosity about the dress she would put on when she took off her joseph. Miss Nancy, whose thoughts were always conducted with the propriety and moderation conspicuous in her manners, remarked to herself that the Miss Gunns were rather hard-featured than otherwise, and that such very low dresses as they wore might have been attributed to vanity if their shoulders had been pretty, but that, being as they were, it was not reasonable to suppose that they showed their necks from a love of display, but rather from some obligation not inconsistent with sense and modesty. She felt convinced, as she opened her box, that this must be her aunt Osgood’s opinion, for Miss Nancy’s mind resembled her aunt’s to a degree that everybody said was surprising, considering the kinship was on Mr. Osgood’s side; and though you might not have supposed it from the formality of their greeting, there was a devoted attachment and mutual admiration between aunt and niece. Even Miss Nancy’s refusal of her cousin Gilbert Osgood (on the ground solely that he was her cousin), though it had grieved her aunt greatly, had not in the least cooled the preference which had determined her to leave Nancy several of her hereditary ornaments, let Gilbert’s future wife be whom she might.
The questions and answers continued until they were sure that the Lammeters were all doing well, and the same went for the Osgoods. They also confirmed that niece Priscilla would definitely arrive soon, and that traveling on pillions in snowy weather was unpleasant, even though a joseph provided great protection. Then Nancy was formally introduced to her aunt’s guests, the Miss Gunns, who were the daughters of a woman known to their mother, though this was their first trip to this area. The ladies were so surprised to see such a lovely face and figure in a remote country place that they became curious about what dress Nancy would wear when she took off her joseph. Miss Nancy, whose thoughts were always marked by propriety and moderation evident in her manners, noted to herself that the Miss Gunns were rather hard-featured and that their very low dresses might seem vain if their shoulders were pretty, but since they weren’t, it seemed unreasonable to think they showed their necks out of love for display; it was more likely some obligation that didn't conflict with sense and modesty. She felt sure, as she opened her box, that this must be her aunt Osgood’s perspective, because Miss Nancy’s thinking was so similar to her aunt’s that everyone found it surprising, considering that the connection was from Mr. Osgood’s side. And although their greeting seemed formal, there was a deep attachment and mutual admiration between aunt and niece. Even Miss Nancy’s rejection of her cousin Gilbert Osgood solely because he was her cousin, which had upset her aunt greatly, didn’t lessen her aunt's desire to leave Nancy several of her hereditary ornaments, regardless of who Gilbert's future wife might be.
Three of the ladies quickly retired, but the Miss Gunns were quite content that Mrs. Osgood’s inclination to remain with her niece gave them also a reason for staying to see the rustic beauty’s toilette. And it was really a pleasure—from the first opening of the bandbox, where everything smelt of lavender and rose-leaves, to the clasping of the small coral necklace that fitted closely round her little white neck. Everything belonging to Miss Nancy was of delicate purity and nattiness: not a crease was where it had no business to be, not a bit of her linen professed whiteness without fulfilling its profession; the very pins on her pincushion were stuck in after a pattern from which she was careful to allow no aberration; and as for her own person, it gave the same idea of perfect unvarying neatness as the body of a little bird. It is true that her light-brown hair was cropped behind like a boy’s, and was dressed in front in a number of flat rings, that lay quite away from her face; but there was no sort of coiffure that could make Miss Nancy’s cheek and neck look otherwise than pretty; and when at last she stood complete in her silvery twilled silk, her lace tucker, her coral necklace, and coral ear-drops, the Miss Gunns could see nothing to criticise except her hands, which bore the traces of butter-making, cheese-crushing, and even still coarser work. But Miss Nancy was not ashamed of that, for even while she was dressing she narrated to her aunt how she and Priscilla had packed their boxes yesterday, because this morning was baking morning, and since they were leaving home, it was desirable to make a good supply of meat-pies for the kitchen; and as she concluded this judicious remark, she turned to the Miss Gunns that she might not commit the rudeness of not including them in the conversation. The Miss Gunns smiled stiffly, and thought what a pity it was that these rich country people, who could afford to buy such good clothes (really Miss Nancy’s lace and silk were very costly), should be brought up in utter ignorance and vulgarity. She actually said “mate” for “meat,” “’appen” for “perhaps,” and “oss” for “horse,” which, to young ladies living in good Lytherly society, who habitually said ’orse, even in domestic privacy, and only said ’appen on the right occasions, was necessarily shocking. Miss Nancy, indeed, had never been to any school higher than Dame Tedman’s: her acquaintance with profane literature hardly went beyond the rhymes she had worked in her large sampler under the lamb and the shepherdess; and in order to balance an account, she was obliged to effect her subtraction by removing visible metallic shillings and sixpences from a visible metallic total. There is hardly a servant-maid in these days who is not better informed than Miss Nancy; yet she had the essential attributes of a lady—high veracity, delicate honour in her dealings, deference to others, and refined personal habits,—and lest these should not suffice to convince grammatical fair ones that her feelings can at all resemble theirs, I will add that she was slightly proud and exacting, and as constant in her affection towards a baseless opinion as towards an erring lover.
Three of the ladies quickly went away, but the Miss Gunns were quite happy that Mrs. Osgood wanted to stay with her niece, giving them a reason to stick around and see the rustic beauty get ready. And it really was a pleasure—from the moment the bandbox was opened, filling the air with the scent of lavender and rose petals, to the fastening of the small coral necklace that hugged her little white neck. Everything belonging to Miss Nancy was perfectly pure and tidy: not a crease was out of place, and not a bit of her linen claimed to be white unless it really was; even the pins on her pincushion were arranged in a pattern that she made sure not to disrupt; and as for her own appearance, it exuded the same sense of flawless neatness as the body of a little bird. It’s true that her light-brown hair was trimmed short at the back like a boy’s, with flat curls in front that stayed clear of her face; but no hairstyle could make Miss Nancy’s cheeks and neck look any less pretty; and when she finally stood complete in her silvery twilled silk, her lace tucker, her coral necklace, and coral earrings, the Miss Gunns couldn’t find anything to criticize except her hands, which showed evidence of butter-making, cheese-crushing, and even rougher work. But Miss Nancy wasn’t embarrassed by that; even while she dressed, she told her aunt how she and Priscilla had packed their boxes yesterday because today was baking day, and since they were leaving home, it was best to stock up on meat pies for the kitchen; and as she wrapped up this sensible point, she turned to the Miss Gunns so as not to seem rude by excluding them from the conversation. The Miss Gunns smiled stiffly, thinking how unfortunate it was that these wealthy country folks, who could afford such nice clothes (really, Miss Nancy’s lace and silk were quite expensive), had been raised in complete ignorance and crudeness. She actually said “mate” for “meat,” “’appen” for “perhaps,” and “oss” for “horse,” which, to young ladies living in refined Lytherly society, who always said 'orse even in the privacy of their homes and only said 'appen on the right occasions, was understandably shocking. Miss Nancy had never attended any school beyond Dame Tedman’s: her knowledge of literature hardly extended beyond the rhymes she had stitched into her large sampler of the lamb and the shepherdess; and to balance an account, she had to physically remove shiny metallic shillings and sixpences from a visible total. There’s hardly a servant girl nowadays who isn’t better educated than Miss Nancy; yet she possessed the essential qualities of a lady—integrity, delicate honor in her dealings, respect for others, and refined personal habits—and lest these traits might not convince the grammatically precise young ladies that her feelings could resemble theirs, I’ll add that she was slightly proud and demanding, and as steadfast in her affection for a misguided opinion as she was for an unfaithful lover.
The anxiety about sister Priscilla, which had grown rather active by the time the coral necklace was clasped, was happily ended by the entrance of that cheerful-looking lady herself, with a face made blowsy by cold and damp. After the first questions and greetings, she turned to Nancy, and surveyed her from head to foot—then wheeled her round, to ascertain that the back view was equally faultless.
The worry about Sister Priscilla, which had become quite intense by the time the coral necklace was fastened, was happily resolved with the arrival of the cheerful-looking lady herself, whose face was rosy from the cold and damp. After the initial questions and greetings, she turned to Nancy and looked her up and down—then spun her around to check that the back view was just as perfect.
“What do you think o’ these gowns, aunt Osgood?” said Priscilla, while Nancy helped her to unrobe.
“What do you think of these gowns, Aunt Osgood?” Priscilla asked as Nancy helped her take them off.
“Very handsome indeed, niece,” said Mrs. Osgood, with a slight increase of formality. She always thought niece Priscilla too rough.
“Very handsome indeed, niece,” said Mrs. Osgood, with a bit more formality. She always thought her niece Priscilla was too rough around the edges.
“I’m obliged to have the same as Nancy, you know, for all I’m five years older, and it makes me look yallow; for she never will have anything without I have mine just like it, because she wants us to look like sisters. And I tell her, folks ’ull think it’s my weakness makes me fancy as I shall look pretty in what she looks pretty in. For I am ugly—there’s no denying that: I feature my father’s family. But, law! I don’t mind, do you?” Priscilla here turned to the Miss Gunns, rattling on in too much preoccupation with the delight of talking, to notice that her candour was not appreciated. “The pretty uns do for fly-catchers—they keep the men off us. I’ve no opinion o’ the men, Miss Gunn—I don’t know what you have. And as for fretting and stewing about what they’ll think of you from morning till night, and making your life uneasy about what they’re doing when they’re out o’ your sight—as I tell Nancy, it’s a folly no woman need be guilty of, if she’s got a good father and a good home: let her leave it to them as have got no fortin, and can’t help themselves. As I say, Mr. Have-your-own-way is the best husband, and the only one I’d ever promise to obey. I know it isn’t pleasant, when you’ve been used to living in a big way, and managing hogsheads and all that, to go and put your nose in by somebody else’s fireside, or to sit down by yourself to a scrag or a knuckle; but, thank God! my father’s a sober man and likely to live; and if you’ve got a man by the chimney-corner, it doesn’t matter if he’s childish—the business needn’t be broke up.”
“I have to wear the same things as Nancy, you know, even though I'm five years older, and it makes me look pale; she won’t wear anything unless I have the same because she wants us to look like sisters. I tell her that people will think it’s my weakness that makes me believe I’ll look pretty in what she looks pretty in. Because I am ugly—there’s no denying that: I take after my father’s side of the family. But, honestly! I don’t mind, do you?” Priscilla turned to the Miss Gunns, chattering away too happily to realize that her honesty wasn’t welcomed. “The pretty ones are like bait—they keep the men away from us. I have no opinion of men, Miss Gunn—I don’t know what you think. And as for stressing and worrying about what they'll think of you from morning till night, and making your life difficult about what they're doing when they're out of sight—as I tell Nancy, it's foolishness no woman needs to be guilty of, if she has a good father and a good home: let it be a concern for those who have no means and can’t help themselves. As I say, Mr. Have-your-own-way is the best husband, and the only one I’d ever promise to obey. I know it’s not pleasant, when you’re used to living grandly and managing all that, to go and put your nose in somebody else’s business, or to sit down by yourself to just a scrap or a knuckle; but, thank God! my father’s a sober man and likely to live; and if you’ve got a man by the fireplace, it doesn’t matter if he’s childish—the household doesn’t need to fall apart.”
The delicate process of getting her narrow gown over her head without injury to her smooth curls, obliged Miss Priscilla to pause in this rapid survey of life, and Mrs. Osgood seized the opportunity of rising and saying—
The tricky task of pulling her fitted gown over her head without messing up her smooth curls made Miss Priscilla stop her quick look around at life, and Mrs. Osgood took the chance to stand up and say—
“Well, niece, you’ll follow us. The Miss Gunns will like to go down.”
“Well, niece, you’re coming with us. The Miss Gunns will want to go down.”
“Sister,” said Nancy, when they were alone, “you’ve offended the Miss Gunns, I’m sure.”
“Sister,” Nancy said when they were alone, “I’m pretty sure you’ve offended the Miss Gunns.”
“What have I done, child?” said Priscilla, in some alarm.
“What have I done, sweetheart?” said Priscilla, a bit worried.
“Why, you asked them if they minded about being ugly—you’re so very blunt.”
“Why, you asked them if they cared about being ugly—you’re so straightforward.”
“Law, did I? Well, it popped out: it’s a mercy I said no more, for I’m a bad un to live with folks when they don’t like the truth. But as for being ugly, look at me, child, in this silver-coloured silk—I told you how it ’ud be—I look as yallow as a daffadil. Anybody ’ud say you wanted to make a mawkin of me.”
“Did I really? Well, it just slipped out: it’s a good thing I didn’t say anything more, because I’m hard to be around when people can’t handle the truth. But as for being unattractive, just look at me, kid, in this silver-colored silk—I warned you how it would turn out—I look as yellow as a daffodil. Anyone would say you’re trying to make a fool out of me.”
“No, Priscy, don’t say so. I begged and prayed of you not to let us have this silk if you’d like another better. I was willing to have your choice, you know I was,” said Nancy, in anxious self-vindication.
“No, Priscy, don’t say that. I begged and pleaded with you not to take this silk if you preferred another one. I was happy to go with your choice, you know I was,” said Nancy, anxiously trying to defend herself.
“Nonsense, child! you know you’d set your heart on this; and reason good, for you’re the colour o’ cream. It ’ud be fine doings for you to dress yourself to suit my skin. What I find fault with, is that notion o’ yours as I must dress myself just like you. But you do as you like with me—you always did, from when first you begun to walk. If you wanted to go the field’s length, the field’s length you’d go; and there was no whipping you, for you looked as prim and innicent as a daisy all the while.”
“Nonsense, kid! You know you’ve had your heart set on this, and it makes sense because you’re the color of cream. It would be ridiculous for you to dress to match my skin. What I’m upset about is that you think I should dress just like you. But you do whatever you want with me—you always have, since the first time you started walking. If you wanted to go all the way to the field, that’s exactly where you’d go; and there was no stopping you because you looked so prim and innocent like a daisy the whole time.”
“Priscy,” said Nancy, gently, as she fastened a coral necklace, exactly like her own, round Priscilla’s neck, which was very far from being like her own, “I’m sure I’m willing to give way as far as is right, but who shouldn’t dress alike if it isn’t sisters? Would you have us go about looking as if we were no kin to one another—us that have got no mother and not another sister in the world? I’d do what was right, if I dressed in a gown dyed with cheese-colouring; and I’d rather you’d choose, and let me wear what pleases you.”
“Priscy,” Nancy said gently, as she put a coral necklace, just like her own, around Priscilla’s neck, which was nothing like hers, “I’m totally willing to compromise, but who else should dress alike if not sisters? Would you want us to walk around looking like we’re not related—especially since we have no mother and not another sister in the world? I’d do what’s right, even if it meant wearing a dress dyed with cheese coloring; but I’d rather you choose, and let me wear what makes you happy.”
“There you go again! You’d come round to the same thing if one talked to you from Saturday night till Saturday morning. It’ll be fine fun to see how you’ll master your husband and never raise your voice above the singing o’ the kettle all the while. I like to see the men mastered!”
"There you go again! You’d come back to the same thing if someone talked to you from Saturday night until Saturday morning. It’ll be fun to see how you manage your husband and never raise your voice above the sound of the kettle the whole time. I love to see the men in control!"
“Don’t talk so, Priscy,” said Nancy, blushing. “You know I don’t mean ever to be married.”
“Don’t talk that way, Priscy,” said Nancy, blushing. “You know I never intend to get married.”
“Oh, you never mean a fiddlestick’s end!” said Priscilla, as she arranged her discarded dress, and closed her bandbox. “Who shall I have to work for when father’s gone, if you are to go and take notions in your head and be an old maid, because some folks are no better than they should be? I haven’t a bit o’ patience with you—sitting on an addled egg for ever, as if there was never a fresh un in the world. One old maid’s enough out o’ two sisters; and I shall do credit to a single life, for God A’mighty meant me for it. Come, we can go down now. I’m as ready as a mawkin can be—there’s nothing awanting to frighten the crows, now I’ve got my ear-droppers in.”
“Oh, you don't mean a word of it!” said Priscilla, as she tidied up her discarded dress and closed her box. “Who am I supposed to work for when Dad's gone if you're just going to have fancy ideas and become an old maid because some people aren't very good? I don't have any patience for you—sitting around waiting like there's never going to be another chance in the world. One old maid is enough between two sisters, and I'll make a single life work because that's what God meant for me. Come on, we can head down now. I'm as ready as I can be—there’s nothing left to scare off the crows now that I've got my earrings in.”
As the two Miss Lammeters walked into the large parlour together, any one who did not know the character of both might certainly have supposed that the reason why the square-shouldered, clumsy, high-featured Priscilla wore a dress the facsimile of her pretty sister’s, was either the mistaken vanity of the one, or the malicious contrivance of the other in order to set off her own rare beauty. But the good-natured self-forgetful cheeriness and common-sense of Priscilla would soon have dissipated the one suspicion; and the modest calm of Nancy’s speech and manners told clearly of a mind free from all disavowed devices.
As the two Miss Lammeters walked into the large parlor together, anyone who didn't know them might have assumed that the reason the square-shouldered, awkward, and strikingly-featured Priscilla was wearing a dress just like her pretty sister’s was either Priscilla’s misguided vanity or an intentional move by Nancy to highlight her own beauty. However, Priscilla’s kind-hearted, selfless cheeriness and practicality would quickly dispel such doubts, while Nancy’s modest and composed speech and behavior clearly indicated that she had no hidden motives.
Places of honour had been kept for the Miss Lammeters near the head of the principal tea-table in the wainscoted parlour, now looking fresh and pleasant with handsome branches of holly, yew, and laurel, from the abundant growths of the old garden; and Nancy felt an inward flutter, that no firmness of purpose could prevent, when she saw Mr. Godfrey Cass advancing to lead her to a seat between himself and Mr. Crackenthorp, while Priscilla was called to the opposite side between her father and the Squire. It certainly did make some difference to Nancy that the lover she had given up was the young man of quite the highest consequence in the parish—at home in a venerable and unique parlour, which was the extremity of grandeur in her experience, a parlour where she might one day have been mistress, with the consciousness that she was spoken of as “Madam Cass,” the Squire’s wife. These circumstances exalted her inward drama in her own eyes, and deepened the emphasis with which she declared to herself that not the most dazzling rank should induce her to marry a man whose conduct showed him careless of his character, but that, “love once, love always,” was the motto of a true and pure woman, and no man should ever have any right over her which would be a call on her to destroy the dried flowers that she treasured, and always would treasure, for Godfrey Cass’s sake. And Nancy was capable of keeping her word to herself under very trying conditions. Nothing but a becoming blush betrayed the moving thoughts that urged themselves upon her as she accepted the seat next to Mr. Crackenthorp; for she was so instinctively neat and adroit in all her actions, and her pretty lips met each other with such quiet firmness, that it would have been difficult for her to appear agitated.
Places of honor had been reserved for the Miss Lammeters near the front of the main tea table in the beautifully decorated parlor, which looked fresh and inviting with lovely branches of holly, yew, and laurel from the abundant growth of the old garden. Nancy felt a flutter inside her that no amount of resolve could suppress when she saw Mr. Godfrey Cass coming over to lead her to a seat between himself and Mr. Crackenthorp, while Priscilla was directed to the other side, between her father and the Squire. It certainly mattered to Nancy that the man she had given up was the most significant young man in the parish—at home in a distinguished and unique parlor, which was the height of grandeur in her experience, a parlor where she might have been the lady of the house, with the knowledge that she was referred to as “Madam Cass,” the Squire’s wife. These circumstances heightened her inner drama in her own eyes and reinforced her declaration to herself that not even the most impressive status would make her marry a man who was indifferent to his reputation; instead, she believed that "love once, love always" was the motto of a true and virtuous woman, and no man should ever have any claim over her that would force her to give up the dried flowers she cherished and always would cherish for Godfrey Cass’s sake. And Nancy had the strength to keep her promises to herself under very challenging circumstances. Only a slight blush revealed the swirling thoughts that pressed on her as she took the seat next to Mr. Crackenthorp; she was so naturally neat and graceful in all her movements, and her lovely lips pressed together with such calm determination, that it would have been hard for her to seem unsettled.
It was not the rector’s practice to let a charming blush pass without an appropriate compliment. He was not in the least lofty or aristocratic, but simply a merry-eyed, small-featured, grey-haired man, with his chin propped by an ample, many-creased white neckcloth which seemed to predominate over every other point in his person, and somehow to impress its peculiar character on his remarks; so that to have considered his amenities apart from his cravat would have been a severe, and perhaps a dangerous, effort of abstraction.
It wasn't the rector's style to let a lovely blush go by without an appropriate compliment. He wasn’t at all snobbish or aristocratic; he was just a cheerful-eyed, small-featured, gray-haired man, with his chin supported by a large, wrinkled white necktie that seemed to overshadow everything else about him and somehow influenced the way he spoke. It would have been quite a challenge, and perhaps even a risky one, to think about his kindness without considering his cravat.
“Ha, Miss Nancy,” he said, turning his head within his cravat and smiling down pleasantly upon her, “when anybody pretends this has been a severe winter, I shall tell them I saw the roses blooming on New Year’s Eve—eh, Godfrey, what do you say?”
“Ha, Miss Nancy,” he said, adjusting his scarf and smiling warmly at her, “when anyone claims this has been a tough winter, I’ll tell them I saw the roses blooming on New Year’s Eve—right, Godfrey, what do you say?”
Godfrey made no reply, and avoided looking at Nancy very markedly; for though these complimentary personalities were held to be in excellent taste in old-fashioned Raveloe society, reverent love has a politeness of its own which it teaches to men otherwise of small schooling. But the Squire was rather impatient at Godfrey’s showing himself a dull spark in this way. By this advanced hour of the day, the Squire was always in higher spirits than we have seen him in at the breakfast-table, and felt it quite pleasant to fulfil the hereditary duty of being noisily jovial and patronizing: the large silver snuff-box was in active service and was offered without fail to all neighbours from time to time, however often they might have declined the favour. At present, the Squire had only given an express welcome to the heads of families as they appeared; but always as the evening deepened, his hospitality rayed out more widely, till he had tapped the youngest guests on the back and shown a peculiar fondness for their presence, in the full belief that they must feel their lives made happy by their belonging to a parish where there was such a hearty man as Squire Cass to invite them and wish them well. Even in this early stage of the jovial mood, it was natural that he should wish to supply his son’s deficiencies by looking and speaking for him.
Godfrey didn’t respond and pointedly avoided making eye contact with Nancy. While compliments were considered classy in the old-school Raveloe society, genuine love has its own kind of politeness that even less educated men learn. However, the Squire was getting a bit impatient with Godfrey for being so dull. At this time of day, the Squire was typically in a better mood than we saw him at breakfast, and he enjoyed embracing his role of being loud and jovial. The large silver snuff-box was in full use, offered to neighbors frequently, even if they often declined. Right now, the Squire had only welcomed the heads of families as they arrived, but as the evening progressed, his hospitality expanded, and he would affectionately tap the younger guests on the back, convinced they felt lucky to belong to a parish with a cheerful host like Squire Cass. Even in the early stages of his festive spirit, it made sense for him to want to compensate for his son’s shortcomings by speaking and acting on his behalf.
“Aye, aye,” he began, offering his snuff-box to Mr. Lammeter, who for the second time bowed his head and waved his hand in stiff rejection of the offer, “us old fellows may wish ourselves young to-night, when we see the mistletoe-bough in the White Parlour. It’s true, most things are gone back’ard in these last thirty years—the country’s going down since the old king fell ill. But when I look at Miss Nancy here, I begin to think the lasses keep up their quality;—ding me if I remember a sample to match her, not when I was a fine young fellow, and thought a deal about my pigtail. No offence to you, madam,” he added, bending to Mrs. Crackenthorp, who sat by him, “I didn’t know you when you were as young as Miss Nancy here.”
“Aye, aye,” he started, offering his snuff-box to Mr. Lammeter, who for the second time bowed his head and waved his hand in a stiff rejection of the offer, “us old guys might wish we were young tonight when we see the mistletoe bough in the White Parlour. It’s true, a lot of things have gone downhill in these last thirty years—the country’s been struggling since the old king got sick. But when I look at Miss Nancy here, I start to think the girls still have their charm;—I swear I can’t remember anyone like her from when I was a fine young man, caring a lot about my pigtail. No offense to you, ma’am,” he added, leaning towards Mrs. Crackenthorp, who sat beside him, “I didn’t know you when you were as young as Miss Nancy here.”
Mrs. Crackenthorp—a small blinking woman, who fidgeted incessantly with her lace, ribbons, and gold chain, turning her head about and making subdued noises, very much like a guinea-pig that twitches its nose and soliloquizes in all company indiscriminately—now blinked and fidgeted towards the Squire, and said, “Oh, no—no offence.”
Mrs. Crackenthorp—a petite, twitchy woman who constantly fussed with her lace, ribbons, and gold chain, swiveling her head and making soft noises, much like a guinea pig that twitches its nose and talks to itself in any company—now blinked and fidgeted toward the Squire and said, “Oh, no—no offense.”
This emphatic compliment of the Squire’s to Nancy was felt by others besides Godfrey to have a diplomatic significance; and her father gave a slight additional erectness to his back, as he looked across the table at her with complacent gravity. That grave and orderly senior was not going to bate a jot of his dignity by seeming elated at the notion of a match between his family and the Squire’s: he was gratified by any honour paid to his daughter; but he must see an alteration in several ways before his consent would be vouchsafed. His spare but healthy person, and high-featured firm face, that looked as if it had never been flushed by excess, was in strong contrast, not only with the Squire’s, but with the appearance of the Raveloe farmers generally—in accordance with a favourite saying of his own, that “breed was stronger than pasture”.
This strong compliment from the Squire to Nancy was noticed by others besides Godfrey as having a diplomatic meaning; her father straightened his back a bit more as he looked across the table at her with satisfied seriousness. That serious and respectable gentleman wasn’t going to lower his dignity by appearing pleased at the idea of a match between his family and the Squire’s: he appreciated any honor shown to his daughter, but he wanted to see some changes in several ways before he would give his approval. His lean yet healthy body and his firm, high-featured face, which looked as if it had never been flushed by excess, were in stark contrast not only to the Squire’s look but also to that of the local farmers—just as he often said, “breed was stronger than pasture.”
“Miss Nancy’s wonderful like what her mother was, though; isn’t she, Kimble?” said the stout lady of that name, looking round for her husband.
“Miss Nancy’s great, just like her mother was, right? Isn’t that true, Kimble?” said the plump lady of that name, looking around for her husband.
But Doctor Kimble (country apothecaries in old days enjoyed that title without authority of diploma), being a thin and agile man, was flitting about the room with his hands in his pockets, making himself agreeable to his feminine patients, with medical impartiality, and being welcomed everywhere as a doctor by hereditary right—not one of those miserable apothecaries who canvass for practice in strange neighbourhoods, and spend all their income in starving their one horse, but a man of substance, able to keep an extravagant table like the best of his patients. Time out of mind the Raveloe doctor had been a Kimble; Kimble was inherently a doctor’s name; and it was difficult to contemplate firmly the melancholy fact that the actual Kimble had no son, so that his practice might one day be handed over to a successor with the incongruous name of Taylor or Johnson. But in that case the wiser people in Raveloe would employ Dr. Blick of Flitton—as less unnatural.
But Doctor Kimble (country pharmacists back then had that title even without a diploma), being a slim and nimble man, was moving around the room with his hands in his pockets, charming his female patients with his medical expertise, and being welcomed everywhere as a doctor by tradition—not one of those desperate pharmacists who seek business in unfamiliar areas and spend all their earnings on keeping their one horse alive, but a man of means, able to host lavish meals like the best of his patients. For as long as anyone could remember, the doctor in Raveloe had been a Kimble; Kimble was essentially a doctor's name; and it was hard to face the sad reality that the current Kimble had no son, so his practice might someday be passed on to a successor with the mismatched name of Taylor or Johnson. But if that happened, the more sensible folks in Raveloe would prefer Dr. Blick from Flitton—as the more acceptable choice.
“Did you speak to me, my dear?” said the authentic doctor, coming quickly to his wife’s side; but, as if foreseeing that she would be too much out of breath to repeat her remark, he went on immediately—“Ha, Miss Priscilla, the sight of you revives the taste of that super-excellent pork-pie. I hope the batch isn’t near an end.”
“Did you say something to me, my dear?” the real doctor asked, rushing to his wife’s side. But anticipating that she might be too out of breath to repeat what she said, he quickly continued, “Ha, Miss Priscilla, seeing you brings back the delicious memory of that amazing pork pie. I hope there’s still some left.”
“Yes, indeed, it is, doctor,” said Priscilla; “but I’ll answer for it the next shall be as good. My pork-pies don’t turn out well by chance.”
“Yes, it really is, doctor,” said Priscilla; “but I can guarantee the next one will be just as good. My pork pies don’t come out well by accident.”
“Not as your doctoring does, eh, Kimble?—because folks forget to take your physic, eh?” said the Squire, who regarded physic and doctors as many loyal churchmen regard the church and the clergy—tasting a joke against them when he was in health, but impatiently eager for their aid when anything was the matter with him. He tapped his box, and looked round with a triumphant laugh.
“Not like your doctoring does, huh, Kimble?—because people forget to take your medicine, right?” said the Squire, who viewed medicine and doctors like many devoted churchgoers see the church and the clergy—finding humor in them when he was well, but desperately wanting their help when he had a problem. He tapped his box and surveyed the room with a triumphant laugh.
“Ah, she has a quick wit, my friend Priscilla has,” said the doctor, choosing to attribute the epigram to a lady rather than allow a brother-in-law that advantage over him. “She saves a little pepper to sprinkle over her talk—that’s the reason why she never puts too much into her pies. There’s my wife now, she never has an answer at her tongue’s end; but if I offend her, she’s sure to scarify my throat with black pepper the next day, or else give me the colic with watery greens. That’s an awful tit-for-tat.” Here the vivacious doctor made a pathetic grimace.
“Ah, my friend Priscilla has a quick wit,” said the doctor, choosing to give the credit to a lady rather than let his brother-in-law take that advantage over him. “She saves a little spice for her conversations—that’s why she never adds too much to her pies. There’s my wife now; she never has a quick comeback ready, but if I upset her, she’s sure to make me suffer with black pepper the next day or give me an upset stomach with watery greens. That’s quite a revenge tactic.” Here, the lively doctor made a humorous grimace.
“Did you ever hear the like?” said Mrs. Kimble, laughing above her double chin with much good-humour, aside to Mrs. Crackenthorp, who blinked and nodded, and seemed to intend a smile, which, by the correlation of forces, went off in small twitchings and noises.
“Have you ever heard anything like this?” said Mrs. Kimble, laughing through her double chin with a lot of good humor, speaking to Mrs. Crackenthorp, who blinked and nodded, and seemed to try to smile, which, because of the way things were, came out as small twitches and noises.
“I suppose that’s the sort of tit-for-tat adopted in your profession, Kimble, if you’ve a grudge against a patient,” said the rector.
“I guess that’s the kind of back-and-forth you use in your job, Kimble, if you hold a grudge against a patient,” said the rector.
“Never do have a grudge against our patients,” said Mr. Kimble, “except when they leave us: and then, you see, we haven’t the chance of prescribing for ’em. Ha, Miss Nancy,” he continued, suddenly skipping to Nancy’s side, “you won’t forget your promise? You’re to save a dance for me, you know.”
“Never hold a grudge against our patients,” Mr. Kimble said, “except when they leave us: and then, you see, we don’t have the chance to prescribe for them. Ha, Miss Nancy,” he continued, suddenly jumping to Nancy’s side, “you won’t forget your promise, right? You’re supposed to save a dance for me, you know.”
“Come, come, Kimble, don’t you be too for’ard,” said the Squire. “Give the young uns fair-play. There’s my son Godfrey’ll be wanting to have a round with you if you run off with Miss Nancy. He’s bespoke her for the first dance, I’ll be bound. Eh, sir! what do you say?” he continued, throwing himself backward, and looking at Godfrey. “Haven’t you asked Miss Nancy to open the dance with you?”
“Come on, Kimble, don’t be too forward,” said the Squire. “Give the kids a fair chance. My son Godfrey will want to have a round with you if you run off with Miss Nancy. I bet he's already asked her for the first dance. Hey, what do you say?” he continued, leaning back and looking at Godfrey. “Haven’t you asked Miss Nancy to start the dance with you?”
Godfrey, sorely uncomfortable under this significant insistence about Nancy, and afraid to think where it would end by the time his father had set his usual hospitable example of drinking before and after supper, saw no course open but to turn to Nancy and say, with as little awkwardness as possible—
Godfrey, really uneasy with the strong pressure about Nancy, and worried about how it would go when his dad inevitably started drinking before and after dinner, felt he had no choice but to turn to Nancy and say, as smoothly as he could—
“No; I’ve not asked her yet, but I hope she’ll consent—if somebody else hasn’t been before me.”
“No, I haven't asked her yet, but I'm hoping she'll agree—if someone else hasn't already done so.”
“No, I’ve not engaged myself,” said Nancy, quietly, though blushingly. (If Mr. Godfrey founded any hopes on her consenting to dance with him, he would soon be undeceived; but there was no need for her to be uncivil.)
“No, I haven't gotten engaged,” Nancy said softly, though she was blushing. (If Mr. Godfrey was hoping she would agree to dance with him, he would quickly be disappointed; but she didn’t need to be rude.)
“Then I hope you’ve no objections to dancing with me,” said Godfrey, beginning to lose the sense that there was anything uncomfortable in this arrangement.
“Then I hope you don’t mind dancing with me,” Godfrey said, starting to forget that there was anything awkward about this situation.
“No, no objections,” said Nancy, in a cold tone.
“No, no objections,” said Nancy, in a chilly tone.
“Ah, well, you’re a lucky fellow, Godfrey,” said uncle Kimble; “but you’re my godson, so I won’t stand in your way. Else I’m not so very old, eh, my dear?” he went on, skipping to his wife’s side again. “You wouldn’t mind my having a second after you were gone—not if I cried a good deal first?”
“Ah, well, you’re a lucky guy, Godfrey,” said Uncle Kimble; “but you’re my godson, so I won’t get in your way. Besides, I’m not that old, right, my dear?” he continued, skipping back to his wife’s side. “You wouldn’t mind me having a second chance after you were gone—not if I got really emotional first?”
“Come, come, take a cup o’ tea and stop your tongue, do,” said good-humoured Mrs. Kimble, feeling some pride in a husband who must be regarded as so clever and amusing by the company generally. If he had only not been irritable at cards!
“Come on, have a cup of tea and stop talking, will you?” said cheerful Mrs. Kimble, feeling proud of a husband who everyone generally found clever and entertaining. If only he hadn’t been so irritable when playing cards!
While safe, well-tested personalities were enlivening the tea in this way, the sound of the fiddle approaching within a distance at which it could be heard distinctly, made the young people look at each other with sympathetic impatience for the end of the meal.
While reliable, well-tested personalities were making the tea lively in this way, the sound of the fiddle getting closer to the point where it could be heard clearly made the young people glance at each other with eager impatience for the meal to finish.
“Why, there’s Solomon in the hall,” said the Squire, “and playing my fav’rite tune, I believe—‘The flaxen-headed ploughboy’—he’s for giving us a hint as we aren’t enough in a hurry to hear him play. Bob,” he called out to his third long-legged son, who was at the other end of the room, “open the door, and tell Solomon to come in. He shall give us a tune here.”
“Look, there’s Solomon in the hall,” said the Squire, “and I think he’s playing my favorite song, ‘The Flaxen-Headed Ploughboy.’ He’s trying to give us a hint since we’re not in a hurry to listen to him play. Bob,” he shouted to his third tall son, who was at the other end of the room, “open the door and ask Solomon to come in. He can play a tune for us here.”
Bob obeyed, and Solomon walked in, fiddling as he walked, for he would on no account break off in the middle of a tune.
Bob followed the instructions, and Solomon entered, playing with his fingers as he walked, because he refused to stop in the middle of a song.
“Here, Solomon,” said the Squire, with loud patronage. “Round here, my man. Ah, I knew it was ‘The flaxen-headed ploughboy’: there’s no finer tune.”
“Here, Solomon,” said the Squire, with a booming sense of importance. “Right over here, my man. Ah, I knew it was ‘The flaxen-headed ploughboy’: there’s no better tune.”
Solomon Macey, a small hale old man with an abundant crop of long white hair reaching nearly to his shoulders, advanced to the indicated spot, bowing reverently while he fiddled, as much as to say that he respected the company, though he respected the key-note more. As soon as he had repeated the tune and lowered his fiddle, he bowed again to the Squire and the rector, and said, “I hope I see your honour and your reverence well, and wishing you health and long life and a happy New Year. And wishing the same to you, Mr. Lammeter, sir; and to the other gentlemen, and the madams, and the young lasses.”
Solomon Macey, a small, sturdy old man with a thick head of long white hair that fell almost to his shoulders, walked up to the designated spot, bowing respectfully while he played, as if to show that he honored the company, though he valued the main theme even more. After repeating the tune and lowering his fiddle, he bowed again to the Squire and the rector, and said, “I hope I see you both doing well, and I wish you health, a long life, and a happy New Year. And the same to you, Mr. Lammeter, sir; and to the other gentlemen, and the ladies, and the young women.”
As Solomon uttered the last words, he bowed in all directions solicitously, lest he should be wanting in due respect. But thereupon he immediately began to prelude, and fell into the tune which he knew would be taken as a special compliment by Mr. Lammeter.
As Solomon spoke his final words, he bowed in every direction respectfully, making sure he showed the proper respect. But then he quickly started to play a melody, falling into the tune he knew would be seen as a special compliment to Mr. Lammeter.
“Thank ye, Solomon, thank ye,” said Mr. Lammeter when the fiddle paused again. “That’s ‘Over the hills and far away,’ that is. My father used to say to me, whenever we heard that tune, ‘Ah, lad, I come from over the hills and far away.’ There’s a many tunes I don’t make head or tail of; but that speaks to me like the blackbird’s whistle. I suppose it’s the name: there’s a deal in the name of a tune.”
“Thank you, Solomon, thank you,” Mr. Lammeter said when the fiddle paused again. “That’s ‘Over the hills and far away.’ My father used to say to me, whenever we heard that tune, ‘Ah, son, I come from over the hills and far away.’ There are many tunes I don’t understand, but that one speaks to me like the blackbird’s song. I guess it’s the name; the name of a tune really matters.”
But Solomon was already impatient to prelude again, and presently broke with much spirit into “Sir Roger de Coverley,” at which there was a sound of chairs pushed back, and laughing voices.
But Solomon was already eager to start again, and soon burst into “Sir Roger de Coverley,” which made chairs scrape back and laughter fill the room.
“Aye, aye, Solomon, we know what that means,” said the Squire, rising. “It’s time to begin the dance, eh? Lead the way, then, and we’ll all follow you.”
“Aye, aye, Solomon, we know what that means,” said the Squire, standing up. “It’s time to start the dance, right? Lead the way, and we’ll all follow you.”
So Solomon, holding his white head on one side, and playing vigorously, marched forward at the head of the gay procession into the White Parlour, where the mistletoe-bough was hung, and multitudinous tallow candles made rather a brilliant effect, gleaming from among the berried holly-boughs, and reflected in the old-fashioned oval mirrors fastened in the panels of the white wainscot. A quaint procession! Old Solomon, in his seedy clothes and long white locks, seemed to be luring that decent company by the magic scream of his fiddle—luring discreet matrons in turban-shaped caps, nay, Mrs. Crackenthorp herself, the summit of whose perpendicular feather was on a level with the Squire’s shoulder—luring fair lasses complacently conscious of very short waists and skirts blameless of front-folds—luring burly fathers in large variegated waistcoats, and ruddy sons, for the most part shy and sheepish, in short nether garments and very long coat-tails.
So Solomon, tilting his white head to one side and playing energetically, marched forward at the front of the cheerful procession into the White Parlour, where the mistletoe was hung, and numerous tallow candles created a bright display, shining among the berried holly and reflected in the old-fashioned oval mirrors attached to the white wainscoting. It was a quirky procession! Old Solomon, in his worn-out clothes and long white hair, seemed to be enchanting that respectable crowd with the magical sound of his fiddle—enticing proper matrons in turban-shaped caps, including Mrs. Crackenthorp herself, whose tall feather was level with the Squire’s shoulder—drawing in fair young women proudly aware of their very short waists and skirts without front folds—attracting sturdy fathers in colorful vests and rosy-cheeked sons, mostly shy and awkward, in short trousers and very long coat-tails.
Already Mr. Macey and a few other privileged villagers, who were allowed to be spectators on these great occasions, were seated on benches placed for them near the door; and great was the admiration and satisfaction in that quarter when the couples had formed themselves for the dance, and the Squire led off with Mrs. Crackenthorp, joining hands with the rector and Mrs. Osgood. That was as it should be—that was what everybody had been used to—and the charter of Raveloe seemed to be renewed by the ceremony. It was not thought of as an unbecoming levity for the old and middle-aged people to dance a little before sitting down to cards, but rather as part of their social duties. For what were these if not to be merry at appropriate times, interchanging visits and poultry with due frequency, paying each other old-established compliments in sound traditional phrases, passing well-tried personal jokes, urging your guests to eat and drink too much out of hospitality, and eating and drinking too much in your neighbour’s house to show that you liked your cheer? And the parson naturally set an example in these social duties. For it would not have been possible for the Raveloe mind, without a peculiar revelation, to know that a clergyman should be a pale-faced memento of solemnities, instead of a reasonably faulty man whose exclusive authority to read prayers and preach, to christen, marry, and bury you, necessarily coexisted with the right to sell you the ground to be buried in and to take tithe in kind; on which last point, of course, there was a little grumbling, but not to the extent of irreligion—not of deeper significance than the grumbling at the rain, which was by no means accompanied with a spirit of impious defiance, but with a desire that the prayer for fine weather might be read forthwith.
Mr. Macey and a few other privileged villagers, who were allowed to watch these big events, were already seated on benches set up for them near the door. There was great admiration and satisfaction in that area when the couples formed for the dance, with the Squire kicking things off with Mrs. Crackenthorp, joining hands with the rector and Mrs. Osgood. That was how it should be—that was what everyone was used to—and the tradition of Raveloe seemed to be revived by the ceremony. It wasn’t seen as inappropriate for older and middle-aged people to dance a bit before sitting down to play cards; instead, it was viewed as part of their social responsibilities. After all, what were those duties if not to enjoy themselves at the right times, exchanging visits and chickens regularly, giving each other time-honored compliments in familiar phrases, sharing well-worn personal jokes, encouraging guests to overindulge out of hospitality, and overindulging in their neighbors’ homes to show they appreciated the food and drink? Naturally, the parson set an example in these social duties. It would have been impossible for the people of Raveloe to think otherwise without some sort of revelation, that a clergyman should be a serious figure instead of a reasonably flawed man whose sole authority to read prayers and preach, to baptize, marry, and bury you, had to go hand in hand with the right to sell you burial plots and collect tithes; on that last point, of course, there was some grumbling, but nothing that could be considered irreligious—just minor complaints, like complaining about the rain, which didn’t come with a spirit of defiance but rather with a wish that the prayer for good weather would be said immediately.
There was no reason, then, why the rector’s dancing should not be received as part of the fitness of things quite as much as the Squire’s, or why, on the other hand, Mr. Macey’s official respect should restrain him from subjecting the parson’s performance to that criticism with which minds of extraordinary acuteness must necessarily contemplate the doings of their fallible fellow-men.
There was no reason, then, why the rector’s dancing shouldn’t be seen as perfectly acceptable just like the Squire’s, nor why, on the other hand, Mr. Macey’s official position should prevent him from applying the kind of scrutiny that sharp minds naturally give to the actions of their imperfect peers.
“The Squire’s pretty springe, considering his weight,” said Mr. Macey, “and he stamps uncommon well. But Mr. Lammeter beats ’em all for shapes: you see he holds his head like a sodger, and he isn’t so cushiony as most o’ the oldish gentlefolks—they run fat in general; and he’s got a fine leg. The parson’s nimble enough, but he hasn’t got much of a leg: it’s a bit too thick down’ard, and his knees might be a bit nearer wi’out damage; but he might do worse, he might do worse. Though he hasn’t that grand way o’ waving his hand as the Squire has.”
“The Squire’s handsome springer, considering his size,” said Mr. Macey, “and he jumps really well. But Mr. Lammeter surpasses them all in shape: you see, he holds his head like a soldier, and he’s not as plump as most of the older gentlemen—they tend to be a bit overweight; and he has a nice leg. The parson is quick enough, but he doesn’t have much of a leg: it’s a little too thick toward the bottom, and his knees could stand to be a bit closer without any harm; but he could do worse, he could do worse. Though he doesn’t have that grand way of waving his hand like the Squire does.”
“Talk o’ nimbleness, look at Mrs. Osgood,” said Ben Winthrop, who was holding his son Aaron between his knees. “She trips along with her little steps, so as nobody can see how she goes—it’s like as if she had little wheels to her feet. She doesn’t look a day older nor last year: she’s the finest-made woman as is, let the next be where she will.”
“Speaking of nimbleness, just look at Mrs. Osgood,” said Ben Winthrop, who was holding his son Aaron between his knees. “She moves along with her tiny steps, making it seem like no one can see how she walks—it’s almost like she has little wheels on her feet. She doesn’t look a day older than last year: she’s the best-looking woman there is, no matter where the next one stands.”
“I don’t heed how the women are made,” said Mr. Macey, with some contempt. “They wear nayther coat nor breeches: you can’t make much out o’ their shapes.”
“I don’t care how the women are made,” said Mr. Macey, with some contempt. “They wear neither coat nor pants: you can’t make much out of their shapes.”
“Fayder,” said Aaron, whose feet were busy beating out the tune, “how does that big cock’s-feather stick in Mrs. Crackenthorp’s yead? Is there a little hole for it, like in my shuttle-cock?”
“Fayder,” said Aaron, whose feet were busy tapping out the tune, “how does that big cock’s-feather stay in Mrs. Crackenthorp’s head? Is there a little hole for it, like in my shuttlecock?”
“Hush, lad, hush; that’s the way the ladies dress theirselves, that is,” said the father, adding, however, in an undertone to Mr. Macey, “It does make her look funny, though—partly like a short-necked bottle wi’ a long quill in it. Hey, by jingo, there’s the young Squire leading off now, wi’ Miss Nancy for partners! There’s a lass for you!—like a pink-and-white posy—there’s nobody ’ud think as anybody could be so pritty. I shouldn’t wonder if she’s Madam Cass some day, arter all—and nobody more rightfuller, for they’d make a fine match. You can find nothing against Master Godfrey’s shapes, Macey, I’ll bet a penny.”
“Hush, kid, hush; that’s just how the ladies dress themselves,” said the father, adding quietly to Mr. Macey, “It does make her look a bit silly, though—half like a short-necked bottle with a long feather in it. Wow, look at the young Squire leading off now, with Miss Nancy as his partner! There’s a girl for you!—like a pink-and-white flower—no one would believe someone could be so pretty. I wouldn’t be surprised if she ends up being Madam Cass someday, after all—and nobody would be more suited for it, because they’d make a great couple. You can’t find anything wrong with Master Godfrey's looks, Macey, I’ll bet a penny.”
Mr. Macey screwed up his mouth, leaned his head further on one side, and twirled his thumbs with a presto movement as his eyes followed Godfrey up the dance. At last he summed up his opinion.
Mr. Macey puckered his lips, tilted his head further to one side, and twirled his thumbs quickly as he watched Godfrey move up the dance. Finally, he formed his opinion.
“Pretty well down’ard, but a bit too round i’ the shoulder-blades. And as for them coats as he gets from the Flitton tailor, they’re a poor cut to pay double money for.”
“Pretty much down there, but a bit too rounded at the shoulder blades. And those coats he gets from the Flitton tailor are a bad fit for what he pays for them.”
“Ah, Mr. Macey, you and me are two folks,” said Ben, slightly indignant at this carping. “When I’ve got a pot o’ good ale, I like to swaller it, and do my inside good, i’stead o’ smelling and staring at it to see if I can’t find faut wi’ the brewing. I should like you to pick me out a finer-limbed young fellow nor Master Godfrey—one as ’ud knock you down easier, or ’s more pleasanter-looksed when he’s piert and merry.”
“Hey, Mr. Macey, you and I are two different people,” said Ben, slightly annoyed by this criticism. “When I have a good pint of ale, I prefer to drink it and enjoy it rather than just smell and stare at it trying to find faults in the brewing. I’d like to see you find a more handsome young man than Master Godfrey—someone who could take you down easily or looks better when he’s cheerful and having fun.”
“Tchuh!” said Mr. Macey, provoked to increased severity, “he isn’t come to his right colour yet: he’s partly like a slack-baked pie. And I doubt he’s got a soft place in his head, else why should he be turned round the finger by that offal Dunsey as nobody’s seen o’ late, and let him kill that fine hunting hoss as was the talk o’ the country? And one while he was allays after Miss Nancy, and then it all went off again, like a smell o’ hot porridge, as I may say. That wasn’t my way when I went a-coorting.”
“Ugh!” said Mr. Macey, getting more annoyed, “he hasn't come to his senses yet: he's kind of like a half-baked pie. And I doubt he has much common sense; otherwise, why would he let that worthless Dunsey, who no one’s seen in a while, manipulate him and let him ruin that great hunting horse everyone was talking about? Once, he was always after Miss Nancy, but then that fizzled out, like the smell of hot porridge, I might add. That wasn’t how I acted when I was dating.”
“Ah, but mayhap Miss Nancy hung off, like, and your lass didn’t,” said Ben.
“Ah, but maybe Miss Nancy held back, and your girl didn’t,” said Ben.
“I should say she didn’t,” said Mr. Macey, significantly. “Before I said ‘sniff,’ I took care to know as she’d say ‘snaff,’ and pretty quick too. I wasn’t a-going to open my mouth, like a dog at a fly, and snap it to again, wi’ nothing to swaller.”
“I should say she didn’t,” Mr. Macey said, with emphasis. “Before I said ‘sniff,’ I made sure she’d say ‘snaff,’ and pretty quickly too. I wasn’t about to open my mouth like a dog chasing a fly, only to snap it shut again with nothing to swallow.”
“Well, I think Miss Nancy’s a-coming round again,” said Ben, “for Master Godfrey doesn’t look so down-hearted to-night. And I see he’s for taking her away to sit down, now they’re at the end o’ the dance: that looks like sweethearting, that does.”
“Well, I think Miss Nancy is coming around again,” said Ben, “because Master Godfrey doesn’t look so down tonight. And I see he’s planning to take her away to sit down now that the dance is over: that looks like they’re getting cozy, for sure.”
The reason why Godfrey and Nancy had left the dance was not so tender as Ben imagined. In the close press of couples a slight accident had happened to Nancy’s dress, which, while it was short enough to show her neat ankle in front, was long enough behind to be caught under the stately stamp of the Squire’s foot, so as to rend certain stitches at the waist, and cause much sisterly agitation in Priscilla’s mind, as well as serious concern in Nancy’s. One’s thoughts may be much occupied with love-struggles, but hardly so as to be insensible to a disorder in the general framework of things. Nancy had no sooner completed her duty in the figure they were dancing than she said to Godfrey, with a deep blush, that she must go and sit down till Priscilla could come to her; for the sisters had already exchanged a short whisper and an open-eyed glance full of meaning. No reason less urgent than this could have prevailed on Nancy to give Godfrey this opportunity of sitting apart with her. As for Godfrey, he was feeling so happy and oblivious under the long charm of the country-dance with Nancy, that he got rather bold on the strength of her confusion, and was capable of leading her straight away, without leave asked, into the adjoining small parlour, where the card-tables were set.
The reason why Godfrey and Nancy left the dance wasn’t as sweet as Ben thought. In the crowded space of couples, a little accident happened to Nancy’s dress, which was short enough in front to show her neat ankle, but long enough in back to get caught under the Squire’s foot, tearing some stitches at the waist and causing a lot of sisterly worry for Priscilla, as well as serious concern for Nancy. You might be lost in love, but you can’t ignore a problem with your outfit. As soon as Nancy finished her part in the dance, she told Godfrey, with a deep blush, that she needed to sit down until Priscilla could join her; the sisters had already shared a quick whisper and a meaningful glance. Nothing less urgent could have made Nancy give Godfrey the chance to sit alone with her. Godfrey, feeling so happy and unaware under the spell of the country dance with Nancy, grew bolder because of her embarrassment and led her right into the nearby small parlor where the card tables were set up.
“Oh no, thank you,” said Nancy, coldly, as soon as she perceived where he was going, “not in there. I’ll wait here till Priscilla’s ready to come to me. I’m sorry to bring you out of the dance and make myself troublesome.”
“Oh no, thank you,” Nancy said coldly when she realized what he meant, “not in there. I’ll wait here until Priscilla is ready to join me. I’m sorry to interrupt your dance and be a bother.”
“Why, you’ll be more comfortable here by yourself,” said the artful Godfrey: “I’ll leave you here till your sister can come.” He spoke in an indifferent tone.
“Why, you’ll be more comfortable here on your own,” said the clever Godfrey. “I’ll leave you here until your sister can come.” He said it with a casual tone.
That was an agreeable proposition, and just what Nancy desired; why, then, was she a little hurt that Mr. Godfrey should make it? They entered, and she seated herself on a chair against one of the card-tables, as the stiffest and most unapproachable position she could choose.
That was a nice offer, exactly what Nancy wanted; so why was she a bit upset that Mr. Godfrey made it? They went inside, and she sat down on a chair by one of the card tables, choosing the stiffest and least inviting position she could find.
“Thank you, sir,” she said immediately. “I needn’t give you any more trouble. I’m sorry you’ve had such an unlucky partner.”
“Thank you, sir,” she said right away. “I don’t need to cause you any more trouble. I’m sorry you’ve had such an unfortunate partner.”
“That’s very ill-natured of you,” said Godfrey, standing by her without any sign of intended departure, “to be sorry you’ve danced with me.”
"That's really mean of you," Godfrey said, standing next to her without any hint of wanting to leave, "to regret dancing with me."
“Oh, no, sir, I don’t mean to say what’s ill-natured at all,” said Nancy, looking distractingly prim and pretty. “When gentlemen have so many pleasures, one dance can matter but very little.”
“Oh, no, sir, I don’t mean to say anything rude at all,” said Nancy, looking distractingly neat and pretty. “When gentlemen have so many pleasures, one dance can hardly mean anything.”
“You know that isn’t true. You know one dance with you matters more to me than all the other pleasures in the world.”
“You know that’s not true. You know one dance with you means more to me than all the other pleasures in the world.”
It was a long, long while since Godfrey had said anything so direct as that, and Nancy was startled. But her instinctive dignity and repugnance to any show of emotion made her sit perfectly still, and only throw a little more decision into her voice, as she said—
It had been a really long time since Godfrey had said anything as straightforward as that, and Nancy was taken aback. But her natural sense of dignity and dislike for any display of emotion made her stay completely still, and only add a bit more firmness to her voice as she said—
“No, indeed, Mr. Godfrey, that’s not known to me, and I have very good reasons for thinking different. But if it’s true, I don’t wish to hear it.”
“No, really, Mr. Godfrey, I don’t know anything about that, and I have very good reasons to think otherwise. But if it is true, I don’t want to hear it.”
“Would you never forgive me, then, Nancy—never think well of me, let what would happen—would you never think the present made amends for the past? Not if I turned a good fellow, and gave up everything you didn’t like?”
“Would you really never forgive me, Nancy—never think positively of me, no matter what happens? Would you never believe that the present makes up for the past? Not even if I became a better person and gave up everything you disapprove of?”
Godfrey was half conscious that this sudden opportunity of speaking to Nancy alone had driven him beside himself; but blind feeling had got the mastery of his tongue. Nancy really felt much agitated by the possibility Godfrey’s words suggested, but this very pressure of emotion that she was in danger of finding too strong for her roused all her power of self-command.
Godfrey was somewhat aware that this unexpected chance to talk to Nancy alone had made him lose his cool; but overwhelming emotions had taken control of his speech. Nancy was genuinely shaken by what Godfrey’s words hinted at, but the very intensity of the emotions she faced, which threatened to become too overwhelming, brought out all her ability to stay composed.
“I should be glad to see a good change in anybody, Mr. Godfrey,” she answered, with the slightest discernible difference of tone, “but it ’ud be better if no change was wanted.”
“I’d be happy to see a positive change in anyone, Mr. Godfrey,” she replied, with just a hint of a change in her tone, “but it would be better if no change were necessary.”
“You’re very hard-hearted, Nancy,” said Godfrey, pettishly. “You might encourage me to be a better fellow. I’m very miserable—but you’ve no feeling.”
“You're really cold-hearted, Nancy,” Godfrey said, annoyed. “You could inspire me to be a better guy. I'm really unhappy—but you have no empathy.”
“I think those have the least feeling that act wrong to begin with,” said Nancy, sending out a flash in spite of herself. Godfrey was delighted with that little flash, and would have liked to go on and make her quarrel with him; Nancy was so exasperatingly quiet and firm. But she was not indifferent to him yet, though—
“I think the people who do wrong feel the least to begin with,” said Nancy, sending out a spark despite herself. Godfrey was thrilled by that little spark and would have liked to continue and make her argue with him; Nancy was frustratingly calm and resolute. But she wasn’t indifferent to him yet, though—
The entrance of Priscilla, bustling forward and saying, “Dear heart alive, child, let us look at this gown,” cut off Godfrey’s hopes of a quarrel.
The entrance of Priscilla, rushing in and saying, “Oh my goodness, child, let’s check out this gown,” shut down Godfrey’s hopes for an argument.
“I suppose I must go now,” he said to Priscilla.
“I guess I have to go now,” he said to Priscilla.
“It’s no matter to me whether you go or stay,” said that frank lady, searching for something in her pocket, with a preoccupied brow.
“It doesn’t matter to me whether you go or stay,” said the straightforward woman, looking for something in her pocket with a furrowed brow.
“Do you want me to go?” said Godfrey, looking at Nancy, who was now standing up by Priscilla’s order.
“Do you want me to leave?” Godfrey asked, glancing at Nancy, who was now standing up as Priscilla had instructed.
“As you like,” said Nancy, trying to recover all her former coldness, and looking down carefully at the hem of her gown.
“As you wish,” said Nancy, attempting to regain her previous distance, and focusing intently on the hem of her dress.
“Then I like to stay,” said Godfrey, with a reckless determination to get as much of this joy as he could to-night, and think nothing of the morrow.
“Then I want to stay,” said Godfrey, with a bold determination to soak up as much of this joy as he could tonight, and not worry about tomorrow.
CHAPTER XII.
While Godfrey Cass was taking draughts of forgetfulness from the sweet presence of Nancy, willingly losing all sense of that hidden bond which at other moments galled and fretted him so as to mingle irritation with the very sunshine, Godfrey’s wife was walking with slow uncertain steps through the snow-covered Raveloe lanes, carrying her child in her arms.
While Godfrey Cass was enjoying moments of escape in the comforting presence of Nancy, willingly putting aside the awareness of the secret connection that sometimes bothered him so much it mixed irritation with the sunshine, Godfrey’s wife was walking with slow, unsure steps through the snow-covered lanes of Raveloe, carrying her child in her arms.
This journey on New Year’s Eve was a premeditated act of vengeance which she had kept in her heart ever since Godfrey, in a fit of passion, had told her he would sooner die than acknowledge her as his wife. There would be a great party at the Red House on New Year’s Eve, she knew: her husband would be smiling and smiled upon, hiding her existence in the darkest corner of his heart. But she would mar his pleasure: she would go in her dingy rags, with her faded face, once as handsome as the best, with her little child that had its father’s hair and eyes, and disclose herself to the Squire as his eldest son’s wife. It is seldom that the miserable can help regarding their misery as a wrong inflicted by those who are less miserable. Molly knew that the cause of her dingy rags was not her husband’s neglect, but the demon Opium to whom she was enslaved, body and soul, except in the lingering mother’s tenderness that refused to give him her hungry child. She knew this well; and yet, in the moments of wretched unbenumbed consciousness, the sense of her want and degradation transformed itself continually into bitterness towards Godfrey. He was well off; and if she had her rights she would be well off too. The belief that he repented his marriage, and suffered from it, only aggravated her vindictiveness. Just and self-reproving thoughts do not come to us too thickly, even in the purest air, and with the best lessons of heaven and earth; how should those white-winged delicate messengers make their way to Molly’s poisoned chamber, inhabited by no higher memories than those of a barmaid’s paradise of pink ribbons and gentlemen’s jokes?
This journey on New Year’s Eve was a calculated act of revenge she had harbored ever since Godfrey, in a moment of anger, told her he would rather die than accept her as his wife. She knew there would be a big party at the Red House on New Year’s Eve: her husband would be happy and cheerful, hiding her existence in the darkest part of his heart. But she would ruin his happiness: she would show up in her shabby clothes, with her faded looks, once as beautiful as anyone, with her little child who had his father’s hair and eyes, and reveal herself to the Squire as his eldest son’s wife. It’s rare for the miserable not to view their suffering as a wrong done by those who are less miserable. Molly understood that the reason for her shabby clothes wasn’t just her husband’s neglect, but the grip of Opium that enslaved her, body and soul, except for the lingering motherly love that wouldn’t let her give away her hungry child. She was aware of this; and still, in her moments of painful clarity, her feelings of need and humiliation constantly turned into bitterness toward Godfrey. He was doing well; and if she had her rights, she would be doing well too. The thought that he regretted their marriage and was suffering from it only fueled her desire for revenge. Fair and self-reflective thoughts don’t come to us easily, even in the clearest air, with the best lessons from heaven and earth; how could those ethereal messengers make their way to Molly’s poisoned room, filled with no higher memories than those of a barmaid’s paradise of pink ribbons and gentlemanly jokes?
She had set out at an early hour, but had lingered on the road, inclined by her indolence to believe that if she waited under a warm shed the snow would cease to fall. She had waited longer than she knew, and now that she found herself belated in the snow-hidden ruggedness of the long lanes, even the animation of a vindictive purpose could not keep her spirit from failing. It was seven o’clock, and by this time she was not very far from Raveloe, but she was not familiar enough with those monotonous lanes to know how near she was to her journey’s end. She needed comfort, and she knew but one comforter—the familiar demon in her bosom; but she hesitated a moment, after drawing out the black remnant, before she raised it to her lips. In that moment the mother’s love pleaded for painful consciousness rather than oblivion—pleaded to be left in aching weariness, rather than to have the encircling arms benumbed so that they could not feel the dear burden. In another moment Molly had flung something away, but it was not the black remnant—it was an empty phial. And she walked on again under the breaking cloud, from which there came now and then the light of a quickly veiled star, for a freezing wind had sprung up since the snowing had ceased. But she walked always more and more drowsily, and clutched more and more automatically the sleeping child at her bosom.
She had set out early but had lingered on the road, lazy enough to think that if she waited in a warm shed, the snow would stop falling. She had waited longer than she realized, and now, lost in the snow-covered roughness of the long lanes, even the drive of a vengeful purpose couldn't keep her spirits up. It was seven o'clock, and by this time she wasn't far from Raveloe, but she didn't know those dull lanes well enough to figure out how close she was to her destination. She needed comfort, and she only knew one source of comfort—the familiar demon inside her; but she hesitated for a moment after pulling out the black remnant before bringing it to her lips. In that moment, a mother’s love urged her to endure painful awareness rather than escape—pleaded to remain in aching fatigue instead of numbing her arms so they couldn't feel the precious weight. In another moment, Molly tossed something away, but it wasn't the black remnant—it was an empty bottle. Then she walked on again under the breaking clouds, from which every now and then came the light of a quickly hidden star, as a chilling wind had risen since the snowing had stopped. But she walked more and more drowsily, clutching the sleeping child at her chest more and more automatically.
Slowly the demon was working his will, and cold and weariness were his helpers. Soon she felt nothing but a supreme immediate longing that curtained off all futurity—the longing to lie down and sleep. She had arrived at a spot where her footsteps were no longer checked by a hedgerow, and she had wandered vaguely, unable to distinguish any objects, notwithstanding the wide whiteness around her, and the growing starlight. She sank down against a straggling furze bush, an easy pillow enough; and the bed of snow, too, was soft. She did not feel that the bed was cold, and did not heed whether the child would wake and cry for her. But her arms had not yet relaxed their instinctive clutch; and the little one slumbered on as gently as if it had been rocked in a lace-trimmed cradle.
Slowly, the demon was getting his way, and cold and exhaustion were helping him. Soon, all she felt was an overwhelming desire to lie down and sleep, blocking out any thoughts of the future. She had reached a point where her path was no longer blocked by a hedgerow, and she wandered aimlessly, unable to recognize anything despite the bright whiteness around her and the increasing starlight. She sank against a scraggly furze bush, which made a decent enough pillow, and the snowy ground felt soft. She didn’t notice that the ground was cold or care whether the child would wake and cry for her. But her arms hadn’t yet loosened their instinctive hold; the little one slept peacefully as if it had been rocked in a lace-trimmed cradle.
But the complete torpor came at last: the fingers lost their tension, the arms unbent; then the little head fell away from the bosom, and the blue eyes opened wide on the cold starlight. At first there was a little peevish cry of “mammy,” and an effort to regain the pillowing arm and bosom; but mammy’s ear was deaf, and the pillow seemed to be slipping away backward. Suddenly, as the child rolled downward on its mother’s knees, all wet with snow, its eyes were caught by a bright glancing light on the white ground, and, with the ready transition of infancy, it was immediately absorbed in watching the bright living thing running towards it, yet never arriving. That bright living thing must be caught; and in an instant the child had slipped on all-fours, and held out one little hand to catch the gleam. But the gleam would not be caught in that way, and now the head was held up to see where the cunning gleam came from. It came from a very bright place; and the little one, rising on its legs, toddled through the snow, the old grimy shawl in which it was wrapped trailing behind it, and the queer little bonnet dangling at its back—toddled on to the open door of Silas Marner’s cottage, and right up to the warm hearth, where there was a bright fire of logs and sticks, which had thoroughly warmed the old sack (Silas’s greatcoat) spread out on the bricks to dry. The little one, accustomed to be left to itself for long hours without notice from its mother, squatted down on the sack, and spread its tiny hands towards the blaze, in perfect contentment, gurgling and making many inarticulate communications to the cheerful fire, like a new-hatched gosling beginning to find itself comfortable. But presently the warmth had a lulling effect, and the little golden head sank down on the old sack, and the blue eyes were veiled by their delicate half-transparent lids.
But eventually, complete drowsiness set in: the fingers lost their grip, the arms relaxed; then the small head slipped away from the embrace, and the blue eyes opened wide to the cold starlight. At first, there was a small, whiny cry of “mammy,” along with an attempt to reclaim the comforting arm and chest; but mammy didn’t hear, and the pillow seemed to be sliding away. Suddenly, as the child rolled down onto its mother’s knees, wet from the snow, its eyes were drawn to a bright glimmer on the white ground, and with the quick shift of a young child, it became completely fascinated by the shiny thing moving toward it, yet never getting closer. That shiny thing had to be caught; and in an instant, the child was up on all fours, reaching out one tiny hand to grab the glimmer. But the glimmer wouldn’t be caught that way, so now it lifted its head to see where the clever shine was coming from. It was coming from a very bright spot; and the little one, standing up, waddled through the snow, the old dirty shawl it was wrapped in trailing behind, and the funny little bonnet hanging at its back—toddling toward the open door of Silas Marner’s cottage, and right up to the warm hearth, where there was a bright fire of logs and sticks, thoroughly warming the old sack (Silas’s greatcoat) spread out on the bricks to dry. The little one, used to being left alone for long stretches without any attention from its mother, settled down on the sack and held out its tiny hands toward the flames, perfectly content, babbling and making many unclear sounds to the cheerful fire, like a newly hatched gosling discovering warmth. But soon, the heat had a calming effect, and the little golden head sank down onto the old sack, and the blue eyes were shielded by their delicate, semi-transparent lids.
But where was Silas Marner while this strange visitor had come to his hearth? He was in the cottage, but he did not see the child. During the last few weeks, since he had lost his money, he had contracted the habit of opening his door and looking out from time to time, as if he thought that his money might be somehow coming back to him, or that some trace, some news of it, might be mysteriously on the road, and be caught by the listening ear or the straining eye. It was chiefly at night, when he was not occupied in his loom, that he fell into this repetition of an act for which he could have assigned no definite purpose, and which can hardly be understood except by those who have undergone a bewildering separation from a supremely loved object. In the evening twilight, and later whenever the night was not dark, Silas looked out on that narrow prospect round the Stone-pits, listening and gazing, not with hope, but with mere yearning and unrest.
But where was Silas Marner while this strange visitor had come to his home? He was in the cottage, but he didn't see the child. Over the past few weeks, since he lost his money, he had developed the habit of opening his door and looking out from time to time, as if he thought that somehow his money might come back to him, or that he might catch some hint, some news of it, mysteriously on the way. It was mainly at night, when he wasn't working at his loom, that he repeated this action without being able to explain why, a behavior that can hardly be understood except by those who have gone through a confusing separation from something they deeply loved. In the evening twilight, and later whenever the night wasn't too dark, Silas looked out at the narrow view around the Stone-pits, listening and watching, not with hope, but with sheer longing and unease.
This morning he had been told by some of his neighbours that it was New Year’s Eve, and that he must sit up and hear the old year rung out and the new rung in, because that was good luck, and might bring his money back again. This was only a friendly Raveloe-way of jesting with the half-crazy oddities of a miser, but it had perhaps helped to throw Silas into a more than usually excited state. Since the on-coming of twilight he had opened his door again and again, though only to shut it immediately at seeing all distance veiled by the falling snow. But the last time he opened it the snow had ceased, and the clouds were parting here and there. He stood and listened, and gazed for a long while—there was really something on the road coming towards him then, but he caught no sign of it; and the stillness and the wide trackless snow seemed to narrow his solitude, and touched his yearning with the chill of despair. He went in again, and put his right hand on the latch of the door to close it—but he did not close it: he was arrested, as he had been already since his loss, by the invisible wand of catalepsy, and stood like a graven image, with wide but sightless eyes, holding open his door, powerless to resist either the good or the evil that might enter there.
This morning some of his neighbors told him it was New Year’s Eve and that he should stay up to hear the old year go out and the new one come in, because it would bring him good luck and might help him get his money back. This was just a friendly Raveloe way of joking about the odd quirks of a miser, but it might have made Silas more anxious than usual. Since twilight began, he had opened his door again and again, only to shut it immediately at the sight of the distance obscured by falling snow. But the last time he opened it, the snow had stopped, and the clouds were breaking apart here and there. He stood there and listened, gazing for a long time—there was something on the road coming toward him, but he couldn’t see what it was; the silence and the vast, untouched snow seemed to close in on his solitude, deepening his sense of despair. He went back inside and placed his right hand on the latch to close the door—but he didn’t close it: he was frozen, as he had been since his loss, by an invisible force, standing like a statue with wide but unseeing eyes, holding the door open, powerless to stop either the good or the bad from coming in.
When Marner’s sensibility returned, he continued the action which had been arrested, and closed his door, unaware of the chasm in his consciousness, unaware of any intermediate change, except that the light had grown dim, and that he was chilled and faint. He thought he had been too long standing at the door and looking out. Turning towards the hearth, where the two logs had fallen apart, and sent forth only a red uncertain glimmer, he seated himself on his fireside chair, and was stooping to push his logs together, when, to his blurred vision, it seemed as if there were gold on the floor in front of the hearth. Gold!—his own gold—brought back to him as mysteriously as it had been taken away! He felt his heart begin to beat violently, and for a few moments he was unable to stretch out his hand and grasp the restored treasure. The heap of gold seemed to glow and get larger beneath his agitated gaze. He leaned forward at last, and stretched forth his hand; but instead of the hard coin with the familiar resisting outline, his fingers encountered soft warm curls. In utter amazement, Silas fell on his knees and bent his head low to examine the marvel: it was a sleeping child—a round, fair thing, with soft yellow rings all over its head. Could this be his little sister come back to him in a dream—his little sister whom he had carried about in his arms for a year before she died, when he was a small boy without shoes or stockings? That was the first thought that darted across Silas’s blank wonderment. Was it a dream? He rose to his feet again, pushed his logs together, and, throwing on some dried leaves and sticks, raised a flame; but the flame did not disperse the vision—it only lit up more distinctly the little round form of the child, and its shabby clothing. It was very much like his little sister. Silas sank into his chair powerless, under the double presence of an inexplicable surprise and a hurrying influx of memories. How and when had the child come in without his knowledge? He had never been beyond the door. But along with that question, and almost thrusting it away, there was a vision of the old home and the old streets leading to Lantern Yard—and within that vision another, of the thoughts which had been present with him in those far-off scenes. The thoughts were strange to him now, like old friendships impossible to revive; and yet he had a dreamy feeling that this child was somehow a message come to him from that far-off life: it stirred fibres that had never been moved in Raveloe—old quiverings of tenderness—old impressions of awe at the presentiment of some Power presiding over his life; for his imagination had not yet extricated itself from the sense of mystery in the child’s sudden presence, and had formed no conjectures of ordinary natural means by which the event could have been brought about.
When Marner’s awareness returned, he picked up the interrupted action and closed his door, unaware of the void in his mind, oblivious to any transitional change, except that the light had dimmed and that he felt cold and weak. He thought he had been standing at the door and looking out for too long. Turning towards the hearth, where the two logs had fallen apart and emitted only a weak, flickering glow, he sat down in his fireside chair and was leaning forward to push the logs back together when, through his blurred vision, it looked like there was gold on the floor in front of the hearth. Gold!—his own gold—returned to him as mysteriously as it had been taken! He felt his heart start to race, and for a moment he couldn’t reach out his hand to grab the restored treasure. The pile of gold appeared to glow and grow larger under his excited gaze. Finally, he leaned forward and extended his hand; but instead of the hard coin with its familiar shape, his fingers met soft, warm curls. In complete shock, Silas dropped to his knees and lowered his head to examine the wonder: it was a sleeping child—a round, fair thing, with soft yellow curls all over its head. Could this be his little sister returned to him in a dream—his little sister whom he had carried in his arms for a year before she died when he was a small boy without shoes or stockings? That was the first thought that flashed through Silas’s astonished mind. Was it a dream? He got back to his feet, pushed his logs together, and, adding some dried leaves and sticks, started a flame; but the flame didn’t dispel the vision—it only illuminated the little round form of the child and its shabby clothing more clearly. It looked so much like his little sister. Silas sank into his chair, overwhelmed by a mix of unexplainable surprise and a rush of memories. How and when had the child come in without his knowing? He had never left the door. But along with that question, almost pushing it away, there was a vision of the old home and the old streets leading to Lantern Yard—and within that vision, another one of the thoughts that had been with him in those distant scenes. The thoughts felt strange to him now, like old friendships that were impossible to revive; yet he had a dreamlike sense that this child was somehow a message sent to him from that distant life: it stirred feelings that had never been touched in Raveloe—old stirrings of tenderness—old feelings of awe at a sense of some Power overseeing his life; for his imagination hadn’t yet freed itself from the sense of mystery in the child’s sudden appearance and hadn’t formed any ordinary natural explanations for how this event could have occurred.
But there was a cry on the hearth: the child had awaked, and Marner stooped to lift it on his knee. It clung round his neck, and burst louder and louder into that mingling of inarticulate cries with “mammy” by which little children express the bewilderment of waking. Silas pressed it to him, and almost unconsciously uttered sounds of hushing tenderness, while he bethought himself that some of his porridge, which had got cool by the dying fire, would do to feed the child with if it were only warmed up a little.
But then there was a cry from the hearth: the child had woken up, and Marner bent down to lift it onto his knee. It clung to his neck and started crying louder and louder, mixing inarticulate sounds with “mammy,” which is how little kids show their confusion after waking up. Silas held it close and, almost without thinking, made soft soothing sounds, while he remembered that some of his porridge, which had cooled by the dying fire, would be good to feed the child if he just warmed it up a bit.
He had plenty to do through the next hour. The porridge, sweetened with some dry brown sugar from an old store which he had refrained from using for himself, stopped the cries of the little one, and made her lift her blue eyes with a wide quiet gaze at Silas, as he put the spoon into her mouth. Presently she slipped from his knee and began to toddle about, but with a pretty stagger that made Silas jump up and follow her lest she should fall against anything that would hurt her. But she only fell in a sitting posture on the ground, and began to pull at her boots, looking up at him with a crying face as if the boots hurt her. He took her on his knee again, but it was some time before it occurred to Silas’s dull bachelor mind that the wet boots were the grievance, pressing on her warm ankles. He got them off with difficulty, and baby was at once happily occupied with the primary mystery of her own toes, inviting Silas, with much chuckling, to consider the mystery too. But the wet boots had at last suggested to Silas that the child had been walking on the snow, and this roused him from his entire oblivion of any ordinary means by which it could have entered or been brought into his house. Under the prompting of this new idea, and without waiting to form conjectures, he raised the child in his arms, and went to the door. As soon as he had opened it, there was the cry of “mammy” again, which Silas had not heard since the child’s first hungry waking. Bending forward, he could just discern the marks made by the little feet on the virgin snow, and he followed their track to the furze bushes. “Mammy!” the little one cried again and again, stretching itself forward so as almost to escape from Silas’s arms, before he himself was aware that there was something more than the bush before him—that there was a human body, with the head sunk low in the furze, and half-covered with the shaken snow.
He had a lot to do for the next hour. The porridge, sweetened with some old brown sugar he hadn't used for himself, quieted the little girl and made her gaze up at Silas with wide blue eyes as he spooned it into her mouth. Soon, she slid off his knee and started to toddle around, but her cute wobble made Silas jump up to follow her, worried she might fall into something that could hurt her. Instead, she just sat down on the ground and began tugging at her boots, looking up at him with a sad face as if her boots were bothering her. He picked her up again, but it took him a while to realize that her wet boots were the issue, pressing against her warm ankles. He struggled to get them off, and once he did, the little girl happily distracted herself with the mystery of her own toes, giggling and inviting Silas to join her in the fun. But the wet boots finally made Silas think about how the child had been walking in the snow, snapping him out of his daze regarding how it could have gotten into his house. Prompted by this new thought and without pausing to make guesses, he lifted the child in his arms and went to the door. As soon as he opened it, he heard the little girl cry "mammy" again, a sound Silas hadn’t heard since she first woke up hungry. Leaning forward, he spotted the tiny footprints on the untouched snow and followed them to the furze bushes. “Mammy!” the little one cried again and again, nearly wriggling out of Silas’s grip before he realized there was more than just the bushes in front of him—there was a human figure, slumped low in the furze, partially covered in disturbed snow.
CHAPTER XIII.
It was after the early supper-time at the Red House, and the entertainment was in that stage when bashfulness itself had passed into easy jollity, when gentlemen, conscious of unusual accomplishments, could at length be prevailed on to dance a hornpipe, and when the Squire preferred talking loudly, scattering snuff, and patting his visitors’ backs, to sitting longer at the whist-table—a choice exasperating to uncle Kimble, who, being always volatile in sober business hours, became intense and bitter over cards and brandy, shuffled before his adversary’s deal with a glare of suspicion, and turned up a mean trump-card with an air of inexpressible disgust, as if in a world where such things could happen one might as well enter on a course of reckless profligacy. When the evening had advanced to this pitch of freedom and enjoyment, it was usual for the servants, the heavy duties of supper being well over, to get their share of amusement by coming to look on at the dancing; so that the back regions of the house were left in solitude.
It was after the early dinner at the Red House, and the atmosphere had shifted from shyness to easy cheerfulness, when the gentlemen, proud of their unique skills, could finally be convinced to dance a hornpipe. Meanwhile, the Squire preferred to chat loudly, scatter snuff, and pat his guests on the back rather than stay at the card table any longer—a choice that frustrated Uncle Kimble, who, usually lively during serious business, grew intense and bitter over cards and brandy. He would shuffle before his opponent’s deal with a glare of suspicion and reveal a disappointing trump card with an expression of utter disgust, as if in a world where such things occurred, one might as well dive into reckless indulgence. As the evening reached this level of freedom and fun, it was common for the servants, having completed the heavy work of dinner, to seek their own amusement by watching the dancing, leaving the back rooms of the house in solitude.
There were two doors by which the White Parlour was entered from the hall, and they were both standing open for the sake of air; but the lower one was crowded with the servants and villagers, and only the upper doorway was left free. Bob Cass was figuring in a hornpipe, and his father, very proud of this lithe son, whom he repeatedly declared to be just like himself in his young days in a tone that implied this to be the very highest stamp of juvenile merit, was the centre of a group who had placed themselves opposite the performer, not far from the upper door. Godfrey was standing a little way off, not to admire his brother’s dancing, but to keep sight of Nancy, who was seated in the group, near her father. He stood aloof, because he wished to avoid suggesting himself as a subject for the Squire’s fatherly jokes in connection with matrimony and Miss Nancy Lammeter’s beauty, which were likely to become more and more explicit. But he had the prospect of dancing with her again when the hornpipe was concluded, and in the meanwhile it was very pleasant to get long glances at her quite unobserved.
There were two doors leading into the White Parlour from the hall, and both were wide open to let in some fresh air; however, the lower door was packed with servants and villagers, leaving only the upper doorway clear. Bob Cass was showing off his hornpipe dance, and his father, feeling very proud of his agile son—whom he often claimed was just like him in his youth, which he believed was the highest compliment—was surrounded by a group that had gathered in front of the performer, not far from the upper door. Godfrey stood a bit away, not there to watch his brother dance, but to keep an eye on Nancy, who was sitting with her father in the group. He kept his distance because he wanted to avoid being the target of the Squire’s fatherly jokes about marriage and Nancy Lammeter’s looks, which were bound to become more obvious. But he was looking forward to dancing with her again once the hornpipe was over, and in the meantime, it was nice to steal glances at her without being noticed.
But when Godfrey was lifting his eyes from one of those long glances, they encountered an object as startling to him at that moment as if it had been an apparition from the dead. It was an apparition from that hidden life which lies, like a dark by-street, behind the goodly ornamented facade that meets the sunlight and the gaze of respectable admirers. It was his own child, carried in Silas Marner’s arms. That was his instantaneous impression, unaccompanied by doubt, though he had not seen the child for months past; and when the hope was rising that he might possibly be mistaken, Mr. Crackenthorp and Mr. Lammeter had already advanced to Silas, in astonishment at this strange advent. Godfrey joined them immediately, unable to rest without hearing every word—trying to control himself, but conscious that if any one noticed him, they must see that he was white-lipped and trembling.
But when Godfrey lifted his eyes from one of those long stares, he encountered something as shocking to him at that moment as if it had been a ghost from the dead. It was a ghost from that hidden life that lies, like a dark alley, behind the beautifully decorated facade that greets the sunlight and the gaze of respectable admirers. It was his own child, being carried in Silas Marner’s arms. That was his immediate impression, without any doubt, even though he hadn’t seen the child for months; and just as the hope began to rise that he might be mistaken, Mr. Crackenthorp and Mr. Lammeter had already moved toward Silas, astonished by this unexpected appearance. Godfrey joined them right away, unable to relax without hearing every word—trying to control himself, but aware that if anyone noticed him, they would see that he was pale and trembling.
But now all eyes at that end of the room were bent on Silas Marner; the Squire himself had risen, and asked angrily, “How’s this?—what’s this?—what do you do coming in here in this way?”
But now everyone at that end of the room was staring at Silas Marner; the Squire himself had stood up and asked angrily, “What’s going on?—What’s this?—What are you doing coming in here like this?”
“I’m come for the doctor—I want the doctor,” Silas had said, in the first moment, to Mr. Crackenthorp.
“I’ve come for the doctor—I want the doctor,” Silas said at first to Mr. Crackenthorp.
“Why, what’s the matter, Marner?” said the rector. “The doctor’s here; but say quietly what you want him for.”
“Why, what's wrong, Marner?” asked the rector. “The doctor is here; but please tell me quietly what you need him for.”
“It’s a woman,” said Silas, speaking low, and half-breathlessly, just as Godfrey came up. “She’s dead, I think—dead in the snow at the Stone-pits—not far from my door.”
“It’s a woman,” said Silas, speaking quietly and almost breathlessly, just as Godfrey arrived. “I think she’s dead—dead in the snow at the Stone-pits—not far from my place.”
Godfrey felt a great throb: there was one terror in his mind at that moment: it was, that the woman might not be dead. That was an evil terror—an ugly inmate to have found a nestling-place in Godfrey’s kindly disposition; but no disposition is a security from evil wishes to a man whose happiness hangs on duplicity.
Godfrey felt a strong pulse of anxiety: at that moment, one fear consumed him: what if the woman was not dead? That was a dark fear—an unpleasant thought that had taken root in Godfrey's generally kind nature; but no kind nature can safeguard against dark desires in a man whose happiness relies on deceit.
“Hush, hush!” said Mr. Crackenthorp. “Go out into the hall there. I’ll fetch the doctor to you. Found a woman in the snow—and thinks she’s dead,” he added, speaking low to the Squire. “Better say as little about it as possible: it will shock the ladies. Just tell them a poor woman is ill from cold and hunger. I’ll go and fetch Kimble.”
“Hush, hush!” said Mr. Crackenthorp. “Go out into the hall. I’ll get the doctor for you. I found a woman in the snow—and I think she’s dead,” he added, speaking quietly to the Squire. “We should keep this as quiet as possible: it will upset the ladies. Just tell them a poor woman is suffering from cold and hunger. I’ll go get Kimble.”
By this time, however, the ladies had pressed forward, curious to know what could have brought the solitary linen-weaver there under such strange circumstances, and interested in the pretty child, who, half alarmed and half attracted by the brightness and the numerous company, now frowned and hid her face, now lifted up her head again and looked round placably, until a touch or a coaxing word brought back the frown, and made her bury her face with new determination.
By this time, though, the women had stepped closer, eager to find out what could have brought the lone linen-weaver there under such unusual circumstances, and intrigued by the cute little girl, who, half scared and half drawn in by the brightness and the large crowd, would now scowl and hide her face, then lift her head and look around calmly, until a gentle touch or a kind word caused her to frown again and bury her face with renewed resolve.
“What child is it?” said several ladies at once, and, among the rest, Nancy Lammeter, addressing Godfrey.
“What child is it?” several ladies asked together, including Nancy Lammeter, who turned to Godfrey.
“I don’t know—some poor woman’s who has been found in the snow, I believe,” was the answer Godfrey wrung from himself with a terrible effort. (“After all, am I certain?” he hastened to add, silently, in anticipation of his own conscience.)
“I don’t know—some poor woman who was found in the snow, I think,” was the answer Godfrey forced out with great difficulty. (“After all, am I sure?” he quickly added to himself, anticipating his own conscience.)
“Why, you’d better leave the child here, then, Master Marner,” said good-natured Mrs. Kimble, hesitating, however, to take those dingy clothes into contact with her own ornamented satin bodice. “I’ll tell one o’ the girls to fetch it.”
“Why don’t you leave the child here, then, Master Marner,” said kind-hearted Mrs. Kimble, though she hesitated to let those dirty clothes touch her fancy satin bodice. “I’ll ask one of the girls to get it.”
“No—no—I can’t part with it, I can’t let it go,” said Silas, abruptly. “It’s come to me—I’ve a right to keep it.”
“No—no—I can’t let it go, I can’t do it,” Silas said suddenly. “It’s mine now—I have the right to keep it.”
The proposition to take the child from him had come to Silas quite unexpectedly, and his speech, uttered under a strong sudden impulse, was almost like a revelation to himself: a minute before, he had no distinct intention about the child.
The suggestion to take the child away from him had surprised Silas completely, and his words, spoken in a sudden burst of emotion, felt almost like a discovery to him: just a moment before, he hadn’t had any clear thoughts about the child.
“Did you ever hear the like?” said Mrs. Kimble, in mild surprise, to her neighbour.
“Have you ever heard anything like that?” Mrs. Kimble said, a little surprised, to her neighbor.
“Now, ladies, I must trouble you to stand aside,” said Mr. Kimble, coming from the card-room, in some bitterness at the interruption, but drilled by the long habit of his profession into obedience to unpleasant calls, even when he was hardly sober.
“Now, ladies, I need you to step aside,” said Mr. Kimble, leaving the card room, somewhat annoyed by the interruption but conditioned by years in his profession to respond to unwelcome demands, even when he was barely sober.
“It’s a nasty business turning out now, eh, Kimble?” said the Squire. “He might ha’ gone for your young fellow—the ’prentice, there—what’s his name?”
“It’s a rough situation, isn’t it, Kimble?” said the Squire. “He could have gone after your young man—the apprentice over there—what’s his name?”
“Might? aye—what’s the use of talking about might?” growled uncle Kimble, hastening out with Marner, and followed by Mr. Crackenthorp and Godfrey. “Get me a pair of thick boots, Godfrey, will you? And stay, let somebody run to Winthrop’s and fetch Dolly—she’s the best woman to get. Ben was here himself before supper; is he gone?”
“Might? Yeah—what’s the point in talking about might?” Uncle Kimble grumbled as he rushed out with Marner, followed by Mr. Crackenthorp and Godfrey. “Get me a pair of thick boots, Godfrey, will you? Also, can someone run to Winthrop’s and get Dolly—she’s the best person for this. Ben was here himself before dinner; has he left?”
“Yes, sir, I met him,” said Marner; “but I couldn’t stop to tell him anything, only I said I was going for the doctor, and he said the doctor was at the Squire’s. And I made haste and ran, and there was nobody to be seen at the back o’ the house, and so I went in to where the company was.”
“Yes, I met him,” said Marner; “but I couldn’t stop to tell him anything. I just said I was going for the doctor, and he told me the doctor was at the Squire’s. So I hurried and ran, but there was nobody to be seen at the back of the house, so I went in where the guests were.”
The child, no longer distracted by the bright light and the smiling women’s faces, began to cry and call for “mammy,” though always clinging to Marner, who had apparently won her thorough confidence. Godfrey had come back with the boots, and felt the cry as if some fibre were drawn tight within him.
The child, no longer distracted by the bright light and the smiling women's faces, started to cry and call for "mommy," while still clinging to Marner, who had clearly earned her complete trust. Godfrey returned with the boots and felt the cry resonate within him, like something tugging tight inside.
“I’ll go,” he said, hastily, eager for some movement; “I’ll go and fetch the woman—Mrs. Winthrop.”
“I’ll go,” he said quickly, wanting to take action; “I’ll go and get the woman—Mrs. Winthrop.”
“Oh, pooh—send somebody else,” said uncle Kimble, hurrying away with Marner.
“Oh, come on—send someone else,” said uncle Kimble, rushing off with Marner.
“You’ll let me know if I can be of any use, Kimble,” said Mr. Crackenthorp. But the doctor was out of hearing.
“You’ll let me know if I can help, Kimble,” said Mr. Crackenthorp. But the doctor was out of earshot.
Godfrey, too, had disappeared: he was gone to snatch his hat and coat, having just reflection enough to remember that he must not look like a madman; but he rushed out of the house into the snow without heeding his thin shoes.
Godfrey had also vanished: he had gone to grab his hat and coat, just enough aware to know he shouldn't look crazy; but he dashed out of the house into the snow without caring about his thin shoes.
In a few minutes he was on his rapid way to the Stone-pits by the side of Dolly, who, though feeling that she was entirely in her place in encountering cold and snow on an errand of mercy, was much concerned at a young gentleman’s getting his feet wet under a like impulse.
In a few minutes, he was quickly heading to the Stone-pits alongside Dolly, who, while feeling completely justified in facing the cold and snow for a good cause, was quite worried about a young man getting his feet wet for the same reason.
“You’d a deal better go back, sir,” said Dolly, with respectful compassion. “You’ve no call to catch cold; and I’d ask you if you’d be so good as tell my husband to come, on your way back—he’s at the Rainbow, I doubt—if you found him anyway sober enough to be o’ use. Or else, there’s Mrs. Snell ’ud happen send the boy up to fetch and carry, for there may be things wanted from the doctor’s.”
“You’d be better off going back, sir,” said Dolly with respectful concern. “You don’t need to risk catching a cold; and I’d appreciate it if you could tell my husband to come with you on your way back—he’s probably at the Rainbow, if you find him sober enough to be of any help. Otherwise, Mrs. Snell might send the boy up to get what’s needed from the doctor.”
“No, I’ll stay, now I’m once out—I’ll stay outside here,” said Godfrey, when they came opposite Marner’s cottage. “You can come and tell me if I can do anything.”
“No, I’ll stay, now that I’m out—I’ll stay outside here,” said Godfrey when they reached Marner’s cottage. “You can come and let me know if I can help with anything.”
“Well, sir, you’re very good: you’ve a tender heart,” said Dolly, going to the door.
“Well, sir, you’re really kind: you have a caring heart,” said Dolly, going to the door.
Godfrey was too painfully preoccupied to feel a twinge of self-reproach at this undeserved praise. He walked up and down, unconscious that he was plunging ankle-deep in snow, unconscious of everything but trembling suspense about what was going on in the cottage, and the effect of each alternative on his future lot. No, not quite unconscious of everything else. Deeper down, and half-smothered by passionate desire and dread, there was the sense that he ought not to be waiting on these alternatives; that he ought to accept the consequences of his deeds, own the miserable wife, and fulfil the claims of the helpless child. But he had not moral courage enough to contemplate that active renunciation of Nancy as possible for him: he had only conscience and heart enough to make him for ever uneasy under the weakness that forbade the renunciation. And at this moment his mind leaped away from all restraint toward the sudden prospect of deliverance from his long bondage.
Godfrey was too consumed by his thoughts to feel any guilt about the unearned praise. He paced back and forth, unaware that he was stepping ankle-deep in snow, oblivious to everything except the nervous anticipation about what was happening in the cottage and how each possible outcome would affect his future. No, not entirely unaware of everything else. Deep down, buried beneath intense desire and fear, he felt that he shouldn’t be waiting on these choices; that he should face the consequences of his actions, acknowledge his miserable wife, and take responsibility for the helpless child. But he lacked the courage to imagine that he could actively abandon Nancy: he only had enough conscience and heart to feel constantly uneasy about the weakness that prevented him from doing so. And at that moment, his thoughts raced away from all restraint toward the sudden hope of being freed from his long confinement.
“Is she dead?” said the voice that predominated over every other within him. “If she is, I may marry Nancy; and then I shall be a good fellow in future, and have no secrets, and the child—shall be taken care of somehow.” But across that vision came the other possibility—“She may live, and then it’s all up with me.”
“Is she dead?” said the voice that dominated all the others inside him. “If she is, I could marry Nancy; then I’d be a decent guy from now on, with no secrets, and the child—will be looked after somehow.” But that vision was interrupted by another possibility—“She might live, and then it’s all over for me.”
Godfrey never knew how long it was before the door of the cottage opened and Mr. Kimble came out. He went forward to meet his uncle, prepared to suppress the agitation he must feel, whatever news he was to hear.
Godfrey had no idea how much time passed before the cottage door opened and Mr. Kimble stepped outside. He moved to meet his uncle, ready to hide any anxiety he might feel, no matter what news he was about to receive.
“I waited for you, as I’d come so far,” he said, speaking first.
“I waited for you because I had come so far,” he said, speaking first.
“Pooh, it was nonsense for you to come out: why didn’t you send one of the men? There’s nothing to be done. She’s dead—has been dead for hours, I should say.”
“Pooh, it was pointless for you to come here: why didn’t you send one of the guys? There’s nothing to be done. She’s dead—has been dead for hours, I’d say.”
“What sort of woman is she?” said Godfrey, feeling the blood rush to his face.
“What kind of woman is she?” Godfrey asked, feeling his face flush.
“A young woman, but emaciated, with long black hair. Some vagrant—quite in rags. She’s got a wedding-ring on, however. They must fetch her away to the workhouse to-morrow. Come, come along.”
“A young woman, but very thin, with long black hair. Some homeless person—completely in rags. She’s wearing a wedding ring, though. They’ll take her off to the workhouse tomorrow. Come on, let’s go.”
“I want to look at her,” said Godfrey. “I think I saw such a woman yesterday. I’ll overtake you in a minute or two.”
“I want to see her,” said Godfrey. “I think I saw a woman like that yesterday. I’ll catch up with you in a minute or two.”
Mr. Kimble went on, and Godfrey turned back to the cottage. He cast only one glance at the dead face on the pillow, which Dolly had smoothed with decent care; but he remembered that last look at his unhappy hated wife so well, that at the end of sixteen years every line in the worn face was present to him when he told the full story of this night.
Mr. Kimble continued on, and Godfrey headed back to the cottage. He took just one glance at the dead face on the pillow, which Dolly had carefully smoothed; but he remembered that final look at his unhappy, disliked wife so vividly that after sixteen years, every wrinkle in her worn face was clear to him as he recounted the complete story of that night.
He turned immediately towards the hearth, where Silas Marner sat lulling the child. She was perfectly quiet now, but not asleep—only soothed by sweet porridge and warmth into that wide-gazing calm which makes us older human beings, with our inward turmoil, feel a certain awe in the presence of a little child, such as we feel before some quiet majesty or beauty in the earth or sky—before a steady glowing planet, or a full-flowered eglantine, or the bending trees over a silent pathway. The wide-open blue eyes looked up at Godfrey’s without any uneasiness or sign of recognition: the child could make no visible audible claim on its father; and the father felt a strange mixture of feelings, a conflict of regret and joy, that the pulse of that little heart had no response for the half-jealous yearning in his own, when the blue eyes turned away from him slowly, and fixed themselves on the weaver’s queer face, which was bent low down to look at them, while the small hand began to pull Marner’s withered cheek with loving disfiguration.
He turned right away to the hearth, where Silas Marner was softly rocking the child. She was perfectly still now, but not asleep—just comforted by sweet porridge and warmth into that wide-eyed calm that makes us older humans, with all our inner turmoil, feel a certain awe in the presence of a little child, similar to what we feel before some quiet majesty or beauty in nature—like a steady glowing planet, a blooming wild rose, or the bending trees over a quiet path. The child’s wide-open blue eyes looked up at Godfrey without any fear or sign of recognition: she didn’t seem to have any obvious claim on her father; and he felt a strange mix of emotions, a conflict of regret and joy, as the beat of that little heart showed no response to the half-jealous longing in his own when her blue eyes slowly turned away from him and fixed on the weaver's odd face, which was bent low to look at them, while her small hand began to gently tug at Marner’s withered cheek.
“You’ll take the child to the parish to-morrow?” asked Godfrey, speaking as indifferently as he could.
“You're taking the kid to the parish tomorrow?” asked Godfrey, trying to sound as casual as possible.
“Who says so?” said Marner, sharply. “Will they make me take her?”
“Who says that?” Marner said sharply. “Are they going to force me to take her?”
“Why, you wouldn’t like to keep her, should you—an old bachelor like you?”
“Why, you wouldn’t want to keep her, would you—an old bachelor like you?”
“Till anybody shows they’ve a right to take her away from me,” said Marner. “The mother’s dead, and I reckon it’s got no father: it’s a lone thing—and I’m a lone thing. My money’s gone, I don’t know where—and this is come from I don’t know where. I know nothing—I’m partly mazed.”
“Until someone proves they have the right to take her away from me,” said Marner. “The mother’s dead, and I guess it has no father: it’s alone—and I’m alone. My money’s gone, and I don’t know where—and this has come from I don’t know where. I know nothing—I’m partly confused.”
“Poor little thing!” said Godfrey. “Let me give something towards finding it clothes.”
“Poor little thing!” said Godfrey. “Let me contribute something to get it some clothes.”
He had put his hand in his pocket and found half-a-guinea, and, thrusting it into Silas’s hand, he hurried out of the cottage to overtake Mr. Kimble.
He reached into his pocket and found half a guinea, and after shoving it into Silas’s hand, he quickly left the cottage to catch up with Mr. Kimble.
“Ah, I see it’s not the same woman I saw,” he said, as he came up. “It’s a pretty little child: the old fellow seems to want to keep it; that’s strange for a miser like him. But I gave him a trifle to help him out: the parish isn’t likely to quarrel with him for the right to keep the child.”
“Ah, I see it’s not the same woman I saw,” he said, as he approached. “It’s a cute little kid: the old guy seems to want to keep her; that’s odd for a miser like him. But I gave him a little something to help him out: the parish probably won’t fight him for the right to keep the kid.”
“No; but I’ve seen the time when I might have quarrelled with him for it myself. It’s too late now, though. If the child ran into the fire, your aunt’s too fat to overtake it: she could only sit and grunt like an alarmed sow. But what a fool you are, Godfrey, to come out in your dancing shoes and stockings in this way—and you one of the beaux of the evening, and at your own house! What do you mean by such freaks, young fellow? Has Miss Nancy been cruel, and do you want to spite her by spoiling your pumps?”
“No; but there was a time when I would have argued with him about it myself. It’s too late for that now, though. If the child ran into the fire, your aunt is too heavy to catch up: she would just sit and grunt like a startled pig. But what an idiot you are, Godfrey, to come out in your dancing shoes and stockings like this—and you, one of the stars of the evening, in your own home! What do you think you’re doing, young man? Has Miss Nancy been unkind, and are you trying to get back at her by ruining your shoes?”
“Oh, everything has been disagreeable to-night. I was tired to death of jigging and gallanting, and that bother about the hornpipes. And I’d got to dance with the other Miss Gunn,” said Godfrey, glad of the subterfuge his uncle had suggested to him.
“Oh, everything has been awful tonight. I was exhausted from all the dancing and socializing, and the hassle with the hornpipes. Plus, I had to dance with the other Miss Gunn,” said Godfrey, relieved by the excuse his uncle had given him.
The prevarication and white lies which a mind that keeps itself ambitiously pure is as uneasy under as a great artist under the false touches that no eye detects but his own, are worn as lightly as mere trimmings when once the actions have become a lie.
The hesitations and little white lies that a mind striving to stay pure feels just as uncomfortable about as a great artist does with the subtle flaws that only they can see, are treated as nothing more than mere decorations once the actions have turned into a lie.
Godfrey reappeared in the White Parlour with dry feet, and, since the truth must be told, with a sense of relief and gladness that was too strong for painful thoughts to struggle with. For could he not venture now, whenever opportunity offered, to say the tenderest things to Nancy Lammeter—to promise her and himself that he would always be just what she would desire to see him? There was no danger that his dead wife would be recognized: those were not days of active inquiry and wide report; and as for the registry of their marriage, that was a long way off, buried in unturned pages, away from every one’s interest but his own. Dunsey might betray him if he came back; but Dunsey might be won to silence.
Godfrey came back into the White Parlour with dry feet, and to be honest, he felt such relief and happiness that it overshadowed any painful thoughts. After all, now he could, whenever he got the chance, express his deepest feelings to Nancy Lammeter—promise her and himself that he would always be everything she wanted him to be. There was no risk of anyone recognizing his late wife; those weren’t times of intense scrutiny or wide gossip. As for their marriage record, it was still far out of reach, buried in old, unexamined pages, interesting only to him. Dunsey could expose him if he returned, but Dunsey could also be persuaded to keep quiet.
And when events turn out so much better for a man than he has had reason to dread, is it not a proof that his conduct has been less foolish and blameworthy than it might otherwise have appeared? When we are treated well, we naturally begin to think that we are not altogether unmeritorious, and that it is only just we should treat ourselves well, and not mar our own good fortune. Where, after all, would be the use of his confessing the past to Nancy Lammeter, and throwing away his happiness?—nay, hers? for he felt some confidence that she loved him. As for the child, he would see that it was cared for: he would never forsake it; he would do everything but own it. Perhaps it would be just as happy in life without being owned by its father, seeing that nobody could tell how things would turn out, and that—is there any other reason wanted?—well, then, that the father would be much happier without owning the child.
And when things turn out so much better for someone than they had any reason to fear, isn't it a sign that their actions have been less foolish and blameworthy than they might have seemed? When we are treated well, we naturally start to think that we’re not entirely undeserving, and that it makes sense to treat ourselves well and not ruin our own good fortune. After all, what would be the point of confessing to Nancy Lammeter and throwing away his happiness?—and hers too? He felt fairly sure that she loved him. As for the child, he would make sure it was taken care of; he would never abandon it; he would do everything except claim it as his own. Maybe it would be just as happy in life without being acknowledged by its father, considering that no one could predict how things would turn out—and is there any other reason needed?—well, then, it’s clear that the father would be much happier without owning the child.
CHAPTER XIV.
There was a pauper’s burial that week in Raveloe, and up Kench Yard at Batherley it was known that the dark-haired woman with the fair child, who had lately come to lodge there, was gone away again. That was all the express note taken that Molly had disappeared from the eyes of men. But the unwept death which, to the general lot, seemed as trivial as the summer-shed leaf, was charged with the force of destiny to certain human lives that we know of, shaping their joys and sorrows even to the end.
That week in Raveloe, there was a funeral for a poor person, and up in Kench Yard at Batherley, everyone knew that the dark-haired woman with the fair child, who had recently come to stay there, was gone again. That was the only notable thing mentioned about Molly's disappearance from the world. But the unnoticed death, which seemed insignificant to most, carried a weight of destiny for certain lives we know of, shaping their happiness and grief all the way to the end.
Silas Marner’s determination to keep the “tramp’s child” was matter of hardly less surprise and iterated talk in the village than the robbery of his money. That softening of feeling towards him which dated from his misfortune, that merging of suspicion and dislike in a rather contemptuous pity for him as lone and crazy, was now accompanied with a more active sympathy, especially amongst the women. Notable mothers, who knew what it was to keep children “whole and sweet”; lazy mothers, who knew what it was to be interrupted in folding their arms and scratching their elbows by the mischievous propensities of children just firm on their legs, were equally interested in conjecturing how a lone man would manage with a two-year-old child on his hands, and were equally ready with their suggestions: the notable chiefly telling him what he had better do, and the lazy ones being emphatic in telling him what he would never be able to do.
Silas Marner's decision to take in the "tramp's child" was met with just as much surprise and gossip in the village as the theft of his money. The growing kindness toward him that started after his misfortune, a blend of suspicion and dislike mixed with a somewhat pitying view of him as lonely and odd, now shifted to more active support, especially from the women. Prominent mothers, who understood the challenges of raising children "whole and sweet," and laid-back mothers, who knew all about being interrupted while trying to relax by the playful antics of young kids, were both intrigued by how a solitary man would cope with a toddler. They were quick with their advice: the prominent ones mostly telling him what he should do, while the laid-back ones were vocal about what he would never manage to accomplish.
Among the notable mothers, Dolly Winthrop was the one whose neighbourly offices were the most acceptable to Marner, for they were rendered without any show of bustling instruction. Silas had shown her the half-guinea given to him by Godfrey, and had asked her what he should do about getting some clothes for the child.
Among the notable mothers, Dolly Winthrop was the one whose friendly help was most appreciated by Marner, as it came without any pretense of busybody teaching. Silas had shown her the half-guinea Godfrey had given him and had asked her what he should do about getting some clothes for the child.
“Eh, Master Marner,” said Dolly, “there’s no call to buy, no more nor a pair o’ shoes; for I’ve got the little petticoats as Aaron wore five years ago, and it’s ill spending the money on them baby-clothes, for the child ’ull grow like grass i’ May, bless it—that it will.”
“Hey, Master Marner,” said Dolly, “there’s no need to buy anything, not even a pair of shoes; I’ve got the little petticoats that Aaron wore five years ago, and it’s a waste to spend money on those baby clothes, since the child will grow like grass in May, bless it—that’s for sure.”
And the same day Dolly brought her bundle, and displayed to Marner, one by one, the tiny garments in their due order of succession, most of them patched and darned, but clean and neat as fresh-sprung herbs. This was the introduction to a great ceremony with soap and water, from which Baby came out in new beauty, and sat on Dolly’s knee, handling her toes and chuckling and patting her palms together with an air of having made several discoveries about herself, which she communicated by alternate sounds of “gug-gug-gug,” and “mammy”. The “mammy” was not a cry of need or uneasiness: Baby had been used to utter it without expecting either tender sound or touch to follow.
And on the same day, Dolly brought her bundle and showed Marner the tiny clothes one by one, each in its proper order. Most of them were patched and mended, but they were clean and tidy like fresh herbs. This kicked off a big washing ceremony with soap and water, after which Baby came out looking all fresh and beautiful, sitting on Dolly’s lap, playing with her toes, giggling, and clapping her hands together as if she'd made a bunch of new discoveries about herself. She expressed this with alternating sounds of “gug-gug-gug” and “mammy.” The “mammy” wasn’t a cry of need or distress; Baby had learned to say it without expecting any comforting sounds or touches in return.
“Anybody ’ud think the angils in heaven couldn’t be prettier,” said Dolly, rubbing the golden curls and kissing them. “And to think of its being covered wi’ them dirty rags—and the poor mother—froze to death; but there’s Them as took care of it, and brought it to your door, Master Marner. The door was open, and it walked in over the snow, like as if it had been a little starved robin. Didn’t you say the door was open?”
“Anyone would think the angels in heaven couldn’t be prettier,” said Dolly, rubbing the golden curls and kissing them. “And to think it was covered with those dirty rags—and the poor mother—froze to death; but there’s someone who took care of it and brought it to your door, Master Marner. The door was open, and it walked in over the snow, just like a little starving robin. Didn’t you say the door was open?”
“Yes,” said Silas, meditatively. “Yes—the door was open. The money’s gone I don’t know where, and this is come from I don’t know where.”
“Yes,” said Silas, thinking deeply. “Yes—the door was open. The money is gone; I don’t know where, and this has come from I don’t know where.”
He had not mentioned to any one his unconsciousness of the child’s entrance, shrinking from questions which might lead to the fact he himself suspected—namely, that he had been in one of his trances.
He hadn’t told anyone that he was unaware of the child coming in, avoiding questions that might reveal what he suspected himself—that he had been in one of his trances.
“Ah,” said Dolly, with soothing gravity, “it’s like the night and the morning, and the sleeping and the waking, and the rain and the harvest—one goes and the other comes, and we know nothing how nor where. We may strive and scrat and fend, but it’s little we can do arter all—the big things come and go wi’ no striving o’ our’n—they do, that they do; and I think you’re in the right on it to keep the little un, Master Marner, seeing as it’s been sent to you, though there’s folks as thinks different. You’ll happen be a bit moithered with it while it’s so little; but I’ll come, and welcome, and see to it for you: I’ve a bit o’ time to spare most days, for when one gets up betimes i’ the morning, the clock seems to stan’ still tow’rt ten, afore it’s time to go about the victual. So, as I say, I’ll come and see to the child for you, and welcome.”
“Ah,” said Dolly, in a calming tone, “it’s like night and day, sleeping and waking, rain and harvest—one goes and the other comes, and we don’t know how or where. We can try and struggle, but there’s not much we can really do after all—the big things happen with no effort on our part—they really do; and I think you’re right to keep the little one, Master Marner, since it’s been sent to you, even if some people think otherwise. You might be a bit bothered with it while it’s so small; but I’ll come by, and gladly help out: I usually have some time to spare on most days, because when you get up early in the morning, the clock seems to stand still until it’s nearly ten, before it’s time to start making meals. So, as I said, I’ll come and take care of the child for you, and I’ll be happy to do it.”
“Thank you... kindly,” said Silas, hesitating a little. “I’ll be glad if you’ll tell me things. But,” he added, uneasily, leaning forward to look at Baby with some jealousy, as she was resting her head backward against Dolly’s arm, and eyeing him contentedly from a distance—“But I want to do things for it myself, else it may get fond o’ somebody else, and not fond o’ me. I’ve been used to fending for myself in the house—I can learn, I can learn.”
“Thanks... a lot,” Silas said, pausing for a moment. “I’d appreciate it if you could share things with me. But,” he added, a bit nervously, leaning forward to glance at Baby with some jealousy, as she rested her head back against Dolly’s arm, looking at him happily from afar—“But I want to do things for her myself, otherwise she might get attached to someone else and not to me. I’m used to taking care of myself at home—I can learn, I can learn.”
“Eh, to be sure,” said Dolly, gently. “I’ve seen men as are wonderful handy wi’ children. The men are awk’ard and contrairy mostly, God help ’em—but when the drink’s out of ’em, they aren’t unsensible, though they’re bad for leeching and bandaging—so fiery and unpatient. You see this goes first, next the skin,” proceeded Dolly, taking up the little shirt, and putting it on.
“Sure, I’ve seen men who are really good with kids,” said Dolly softly. “Usually, men are pretty awkward and difficult, bless them—but when they’re not drinking, they aren’t so clueless, even though they struggle with bandaging and taking care of injuries—they’re just so hot-headed and impatient. You see, this goes on first, then the skin,” Dolly continued, picking up the little shirt and putting it on.
“Yes,” said Marner, docilely, bringing his eyes very close, that they might be initiated in the mysteries; whereupon Baby seized his head with both her small arms, and put her lips against his face with purring noises.
“Yes,” said Marner, obediently, bringing his eyes very close so they could be let in on the secrets; then Baby wrapped both her small arms around his head and pressed her lips against his face, making purring sounds.
“See there,” said Dolly, with a woman’s tender tact, “she’s fondest o’ you. She wants to go o’ your lap, I’ll be bound. Go, then: take her, Master Marner; you can put the things on, and then you can say as you’ve done for her from the first of her coming to you.”
“Look there,” said Dolly, with a woman's gentle insight, “she really likes you. She wants to sit on your lap, I’m sure of it. Go ahead: take her, Master Marner; you can put the things on, and then you can say that you’ve cared for her since the very start of her time with you.”
Marner took her on his lap, trembling with an emotion mysterious to himself, at something unknown dawning on his life. Thought and feeling were so confused within him, that if he had tried to give them utterance, he could only have said that the child was come instead of the gold—that the gold had turned into the child. He took the garments from Dolly, and put them on under her teaching; interrupted, of course, by Baby’s gymnastics.
Marner held her on his lap, trembling with an emotion he couldn't fully understand, as something unfamiliar began to change in his life. His thoughts and feelings were so tangled that if he tried to express them, he would only have been able to say that the child had arrived instead of the gold—that the gold had transformed into the child. He took the clothes from Dolly and put them on with her guidance, though he was often interrupted by the baby's antics.
“There, then! why, you take to it quite easy, Master Marner,” said Dolly; “but what shall you do when you’re forced to sit in your loom? For she’ll get busier and mischievouser every day—she will, bless her. It’s lucky as you’ve got that high hearth i’stead of a grate, for that keeps the fire more out of her reach: but if you’ve got anything as can be spilt or broke, or as is fit to cut her fingers off, she’ll be at it—and it is but right you should know.”
“There you go! You seem to handle it pretty well, Master Marner,” said Dolly; “but what are you going to do when you have to sit at your loom? Because she’s going to get more active and mischievous every day—she will, bless her. It’s fortunate you have that high hearth instead of a grate, as it keeps the fire further out of her reach; but if you have anything that can be spilled or broken, or anything that could cut her fingers, she’ll be all over it—and you should definitely know that.”
Silas meditated a little while in some perplexity. “I’ll tie her to the leg o’ the loom,” he said at last—“tie her with a good long strip o’ something.”
Silas thought for a while, feeling a bit confused. “I’ll tie her to the leg of the loom,” he finally said, “tie her with a good long piece of something.”
“Well, mayhap that’ll do, as it’s a little gell, for they’re easier persuaded to sit i’ one place nor the lads. I know what the lads are; for I’ve had four—four I’ve had, God knows—and if you was to take and tie ’em up, they’d make a fighting and a crying as if you was ringing the pigs. But I’ll bring you my little chair, and some bits o’ red rag and things for her to play wi’; an’ she’ll sit and chatter to ’em as if they was alive. Eh, if it wasn’t a sin to the lads to wish ’em made different, bless ’em, I should ha’ been glad for one of ’em to be a little gell; and to think as I could ha’ taught her to scour, and mend, and the knitting, and everything. But I can teach ’em this little un, Master Marner, when she gets old enough.”
“Well, maybe that’ll work, since she’s a little girl, because they’re easier to persuade to sit in one spot than the boys. I know what the boys are like; I’ve had four—four, I swear—and if you tied them up, they’d make a fuss and cry as if you were wringing the pigs. But I’ll bring you my little chair, and some scraps of red rags and things for her to play with; and she’ll sit and chat with them as if they were alive. Oh, if it wasn’t a sin to the boys to wish they were different, bless them, I would’ve loved for one of them to be a little girl; and to think that I could’ve taught her to scrub, and mend, and knit, and everything. But I can teach this little one, Master Marner, when she’s old enough.”
“But she’ll be my little un,” said Marner, rather hastily. “She’ll be nobody else’s.”
“But she’ll be my little one,” Marner said quickly. “She won’t belong to anyone else.”
“No, to be sure; you’ll have a right to her, if you’re a father to her, and bring her up according. But,” added Dolly, coming to a point which she had determined beforehand to touch upon, “you must bring her up like christened folks’s children, and take her to church, and let her learn her catechise, as my little Aaron can say off—the ‘I believe,’ and everything, and ‘hurt nobody by word or deed,’—as well as if he was the clerk. That’s what you must do, Master Marner, if you’d do the right thing by the orphin child.”
“No, for sure; you’ll have a right to her if you’re a father to her and raise her properly. But,” added Dolly, getting to the point she had planned to make, “you must raise her like children from christened families, take her to church, and let her learn her catechism, just like my little Aaron can recite the ‘I believe,’ and everything, and ‘hurt nobody by word or deed,’—as well as if he was the clerk. That’s what you must do, Master Marner, if you want to do the right thing by the orphan child.”
Marner’s pale face flushed suddenly under a new anxiety. His mind was too busy trying to give some definite bearing to Dolly’s words for him to think of answering her.
Marner’s pale face suddenly flushed with a new anxiety. His mind was too occupied trying to make sense of Dolly’s words to think about responding to her.
“And it’s my belief,” she went on, “as the poor little creatur has never been christened, and it’s nothing but right as the parson should be spoke to; and if you was noways unwilling, I’d talk to Mr. Macey about it this very day. For if the child ever went anyways wrong, and you hadn’t done your part by it, Master Marner—’noculation, and everything to save it from harm—it ’ud be a thorn i’ your bed for ever o’ this side the grave; and I can’t think as it ’ud be easy lying down for anybody when they’d got to another world, if they hadn’t done their part by the helpless children as come wi’out their own asking.”
“And I believe,” she continued, “that since the poor little creature has never been baptized, it’s only right that the pastor should be spoken to; and if you’re not against it, I’d like to talk to Mr. Macey about it today. Because if the child ever goes astray and you haven’t done your part for it, Master Marner—like immunization and everything to protect it from harm—it would haunt you for the rest of your life; and I can’t imagine how anyone could find peace in the afterlife if they hadn’t done their part for the helpless children who came into this world without any choice.”
Dolly herself was disposed to be silent for some time now, for she had spoken from the depths of her own simple belief, and was much concerned to know whether her words would produce the desired effect on Silas. He was puzzled and anxious, for Dolly’s word “christened” conveyed no distinct meaning to him. He had only heard of baptism, and had only seen the baptism of grown-up men and women.
Dolly had been quiet for a while because she had expressed her genuine beliefs and was eager to see if her words would have the right impact on Silas. He felt confused and uneasy since Dolly’s term “christened” didn’t have a clear meaning for him. He only knew about baptism and had only witnessed the baptisms of adults.
“What is it as you mean by ‘christened?’” he said at last, timidly. “Won’t folks be good to her without it?”
“What do you mean by ‘christened?’” he finally asked, shyly. “Can’t people be good to her without that?”
“Dear, dear! Master Marner,” said Dolly, with gentle distress and compassion. “Had you never no father nor mother as taught you to say your prayers, and as there’s good words and good things to keep us from harm?”
“Dear, dear! Master Marner,” said Dolly, with gentle concern and compassion. “Did you never have a father or mother who taught you to say your prayers, and to remember the good words and good things that protect us from harm?”
“Yes,” said Silas, in a low voice; “I know a deal about that—used to, used to. But your ways are different: my country was a good way off.” He paused a few moments, and then added, more decidedly, “But I want to do everything as can be done for the child. And whatever’s right for it i’ this country, and you think ’ull do it good, I’ll act according, if you’ll tell me.”
“Yes,” said Silas, in a quiet voice; “I know a lot about that—used to, I used to. But your ways are different: my home was quite far away.” He paused for a moment, then added more firmly, “But I want to do everything that can be done for the child. And whatever’s right for it here, and you think will help, I’ll follow through, if you’ll let me know.”
“Well, then, Master Marner,” said Dolly, inwardly rejoiced, “I’ll ask Mr. Macey to speak to the parson about it; and you must fix on a name for it, because it must have a name giv’ it when it’s christened.”
“Well, then, Mr. Marner,” said Dolly, feeling happy inside, “I’ll ask Mr. Macey to talk to the pastor about it; and you need to choose a name for it, because it needs to have a name when it gets baptized.”
“My mother’s name was Hephzibah,” said Silas, “and my little sister was named after her.”
“My mom’s name was Hephzibah,” said Silas, “and my little sister was named after her.”
“Eh, that’s a hard name,” said Dolly. “I partly think it isn’t a christened name.”
“Uh, that’s a tough name,” said Dolly. “I kind of think it’s not a real name.”
“It’s a Bible name,” said Silas, old ideas recurring.
“It’s a Bible name,” Silas said, old thoughts coming back to him.
“Then I’ve no call to speak again’ it,” said Dolly, rather startled by Silas’s knowledge on this head; “but you see I’m no scholard, and I’m slow at catching the words. My husband says I’m allays like as if I was putting the haft for the handle—that’s what he says—for he’s very sharp, God help him. But it was awk’ard calling your little sister by such a hard name, when you’d got nothing big to say, like—wasn’t it, Master Marner?”
“Then I don’t need to say anything more about it,” said Dolly, a bit surprised by Silas’s understanding of the matter; “but you see, I’m no scholar, and I’m slow to grasp the words. My husband says I always seem like I’m putting the blade before the handle—that’s what he says—because he’s really clever, God help him. But it was awkward to call your little sister such a difficult name when you didn’t have anything significant to say, right? Master Marner?”
“We called her Eppie,” said Silas.
“We called her Eppie,” Silas said.
“Well, if it was noways wrong to shorten the name, it ’ud be a deal handier. And so I’ll go now, Master Marner, and I’ll speak about the christening afore dark; and I wish you the best o’ luck, and it’s my belief as it’ll come to you, if you do what’s right by the orphin child;—and there’s the ’noculation to be seen to; and as to washing its bits o’ things, you need look to nobody but me, for I can do ’em wi’ one hand when I’ve got my suds about. Eh, the blessed angil! You’ll let me bring my Aaron one o’ these days, and he’ll show her his little cart as his father’s made for him, and the black-and-white pup as he’s got a-rearing.”
“Well, if it wasn’t wrong to shorten the name, it’d be much easier. So, I’ll head out now, Master Marner, and I’ll talk about the christening before dark; I wish you the best of luck, and I truly believe it’ll come to you if you do right by the orphan child;—and there’s the inoculation to take care of; as for washing its little clothes, you only need to rely on me, because I can manage that with one hand when I've got my soap ready. Ah, the sweet little angel! You’ll let me bring my Aaron over one of these days, and he’ll show her his little cart that his father made for him, along with the black-and-white puppy he’s raising.”
Baby was christened, the rector deciding that a double baptism was the lesser risk to incur; and on this occasion Silas, making himself as clean and tidy as he could, appeared for the first time within the church, and shared in the observances held sacred by his neighbours. He was quite unable, by means of anything he heard or saw, to identify the Raveloe religion with his old faith; if he could at any time in his previous life have done so, it must have been by the aid of a strong feeling ready to vibrate with sympathy, rather than by a comparison of phrases and ideas: and now for long years that feeling had been dormant. He had no distinct idea about the baptism and the church-going, except that Dolly had said it was for the good of the child; and in this way, as the weeks grew to months, the child created fresh and fresh links between his life and the lives from which he had hitherto shrunk continually into narrower isolation. Unlike the gold which needed nothing, and must be worshipped in close-locked solitude—which was hidden away from the daylight, was deaf to the song of birds, and started to no human tones—Eppie was a creature of endless claims and ever-growing desires, seeking and loving sunshine, and living sounds, and living movements; making trial of everything, with trust in new joy, and stirring the human kindness in all eyes that looked on her. The gold had kept his thoughts in an ever-repeated circle, leading to nothing beyond itself; but Eppie was an object compacted of changes and hopes that forced his thoughts onward, and carried them far away from their old eager pacing towards the same blank limit—carried them away to the new things that would come with the coming years, when Eppie would have learned to understand how her father Silas cared for her; and made him look for images of that time in the ties and charities that bound together the families of his neighbours. The gold had asked that he should sit weaving longer and longer, deafened and blinded more and more to all things except the monotony of his loom and the repetition of his web; but Eppie called him away from his weaving, and made him think all its pauses a holiday, reawakening his senses with her fresh life, even to the old winter-flies that came crawling forth in the early spring sunshine, and warming him into joy because she had joy.
Baby was baptized, with the rector deciding that a double baptism was the lesser risk to take; and on this occasion, Silas, trying to look as clean and neat as possible, attended church for the first time and participated in the rituals cherished by his neighbors. He found it impossible, based on anything he heard or saw, to connect the Raveloe faith with his previous beliefs; if he could have made that connection at any point in his past life, it would have required a strong feeling of sympathy rather than just comparing phrases and ideas: and for many years now, that feeling had been dormant. He had no clear understanding of baptism or going to church, except that Dolly had mentioned it was for the child’s benefit; and as the weeks turned into months, the child created new bonds between his life and the lives he had previously withdrawn from into tighter isolation. Unlike the gold, which required nothing and had to be worshipped alone—hidden from daylight, deaf to birdsong, and unresponsive to human voices—Eppie was a being full of endless needs and growing desires, seeking and cherishing sunlight, lively sounds, and movement; experiencing everything with hope for new joy and stirring the human warmth in everyone who looked at her. The gold had kept his thoughts in a constant loop, leading him nowhere beyond itself; but Eppie was a force of change and hope that pushed his thoughts forward, taking them far away from the relentless cycle heading toward the same empty destination—taking them toward the new experiences that would come in the following years when Eppie would learn how much her father Silas loved her; and making him look for reflections of that future in the connections and kindness that linked his neighbors’ families. The gold had demanded that he weave longer and longer, growing increasingly deaf and blind to everything but the monotony of his loom and the repetition of his work; but Eppie drew him away from weaving and turned his breaks into holidays, reviving his senses with her vibrant life, even to the old winter-flies that crawled out in the early spring sunshine, warming him with joy because she had joy.
And when the sunshine grew strong and lasting, so that the buttercups were thick in the meadows, Silas might be seen in the sunny midday, or in the late afternoon when the shadows were lengthening under the hedgerows, strolling out with uncovered head to carry Eppie beyond the Stone-pits to where the flowers grew, till they reached some favourite bank where he could sit down, while Eppie toddled to pluck the flowers, and make remarks to the winged things that murmured happily above the bright petals, calling “Dad-dad’s” attention continually by bringing him the flowers. Then she would turn her ear to some sudden bird-note, and Silas learned to please her by making signs of hushed stillness, that they might listen for the note to come again: so that when it came, she set up her small back and laughed with gurgling triumph. Sitting on the banks in this way, Silas began to look for the once familiar herbs again; and as the leaves, with their unchanged outline and markings, lay on his palm, there was a sense of crowding remembrances from which he turned away timidly, taking refuge in Eppie’s little world, that lay lightly on his enfeebled spirit.
And when the sun was shining strong and bright, making the buttercups grow thick in the meadows, you could see Silas out in the sunny midday or in the late afternoon when the shadows grew longer under the hedgerows. He would stroll out with his head uncovered, carrying Eppie beyond the Stone-pits to where the flowers bloomed, until they reached some favorite spot where he could sit down while Eppie waddled off to pick flowers and chat with the buzzing insects above the bright petals, constantly calling for “Dad-dad’s” attention by bringing him the flowers. Then she would pause to listen to a sudden bird song, and Silas learned to keep her happy by signaling for them to be quiet so they could wait for the note to come again. When it did, she would sit up straight and laugh in joyful delight. Sitting on the banks like this, Silas began to search for the familiar herbs he once knew; and as the leaves with their unchanged shapes and markings lay in his hand, he felt a rush of memories that made him shy away, seeking comfort in Eppie’s small world, which felt light on his weary spirit.
As the child’s mind was growing into knowledge, his mind was growing into memory: as her life unfolded, his soul, long stupefied in a cold narrow prison, was unfolding too, and trembling gradually into full consciousness.
As the child's mind expanded with knowledge, it was also filling with memories: as her life progressed, his soul, long trapped in a dark, small prison, was awakening too, gradually coming into full awareness.
It was an influence which must gather force with every new year: the tones that stirred Silas’s heart grew articulate, and called for more distinct answers; shapes and sounds grew clearer for Eppie’s eyes and ears, and there was more that “Dad-dad” was imperatively required to notice and account for. Also, by the time Eppie was three years old, she developed a fine capacity for mischief, and for devising ingenious ways of being troublesome, which found much exercise, not only for Silas’s patience, but for his watchfulness and penetration. Sorely was poor Silas puzzled on such occasions by the incompatible demands of love. Dolly Winthrop told him that punishment was good for Eppie, and that, as for rearing a child without making it tingle a little in soft and safe places now and then, it was not to be done.
It was an influence that gained strength with each passing year: the feelings that stirred Silas’s heart became clearer and demanded more specific responses; shapes and sounds became more prominent for Eppie’s eyes and ears, and there were more things that “Dad-dad” was urgently required to notice and address. By the time Eppie turned three, she had developed a great talent for mischief and for coming up with clever ways to be troublesome, which tested Silas’s patience as well as his alertness and insight. Poor Silas was often baffled by the conflicting demands of love in those moments. Dolly Winthrop told him that punishment was beneficial for Eppie, and that raising a child without making it feel a little tingle in soft and safe places from time to time just wasn’t possible.
“To be sure, there’s another thing you might do, Master Marner,” added Dolly, meditatively: “you might shut her up once i’ the coal-hole. That was what I did wi’ Aaron; for I was that silly wi’ the youngest lad, as I could never bear to smack him. Not as I could find i’ my heart to let him stay i’ the coal-hole more nor a minute, but it was enough to colly him all over, so as he must be new washed and dressed, and it was as good as a rod to him—that was. But I put it upo’ your conscience, Master Marner, as there’s one of ’em you must choose—ayther smacking or the coal-hole—else she’ll get so masterful, there’ll be no holding her.”
“To be sure, there’s another thing you might do, Master Marner,” Dolly said thoughtfully. “You could lock her in the coal-hole for a bit. That’s what I did with Aaron; I was so soft on the youngest that I could never bring myself to hit him. Not that I could actually let him stay in the coal-hole for more than a minute, but it was enough to cover him in soot, so he had to be washed and dressed again, and that was just as good as a punishment to him. But I leave it up to you, Master Marner, because you have to choose between either a spanking or the coal-hole. If you don’t, she’ll get so headstrong that there will be no controlling her.”
Silas was impressed with the melancholy truth of this last remark; but his force of mind failed before the only two penal methods open to him, not only because it was painful to him to hurt Eppie, but because he trembled at a moment’s contention with her, lest she should love him the less for it. Let even an affectionate Goliath get himself tied to a small tender thing, dreading to hurt it by pulling, and dreading still more to snap the cord, and which of the two, pray, will be master? It was clear that Eppie, with her short toddling steps, must lead father Silas a pretty dance on any fine morning when circumstances favoured mischief.
Silas was struck by the sad truth of this last comment; however, he couldn't bring himself to choose between the only two punishments available to him. It wasn't just that hurting Eppie was painful for him, but he also feared that a moment of conflict might make her love him less. Imagine a giant being tied to a small, delicate creature, afraid to pull and even more afraid to break the cord—who do you think will really be in charge? It was obvious that Eppie, with her little, unsteady steps, would lead her father Silas in circles on any nice morning when the opportunity for mischief arose.
For example. He had wisely chosen a broad strip of linen as a means of fastening her to his loom when he was busy: it made a broad belt round her waist, and was long enough to allow of her reaching the truckle-bed and sitting down on it, but not long enough for her to attempt any dangerous climbing. One bright summer’s morning Silas had been more engrossed than usual in “setting up” a new piece of work, an occasion on which his scissors were in requisition. These scissors, owing to an especial warning of Dolly’s, had been kept carefully out of Eppie’s reach; but the click of them had had a peculiar attraction for her ear, and watching the results of that click, she had derived the philosophic lesson that the same cause would produce the same effect. Silas had seated himself in his loom, and the noise of weaving had begun; but he had left his scissors on a ledge which Eppie’s arm was long enough to reach; and now, like a small mouse, watching her opportunity, she stole quietly from her corner, secured the scissors, and toddled to the bed again, setting up her back as a mode of concealing the fact. She had a distinct intention as to the use of the scissors; and having cut the linen strip in a jagged but effectual manner, in two moments she had run out at the open door where the sunshine was inviting her, while poor Silas believed her to be a better child than usual. It was not until he happened to need his scissors that the terrible fact burst upon him: Eppie had run out by herself—had perhaps fallen into the Stone-pit. Silas, shaken by the worst fear that could have befallen him, rushed out, calling “Eppie!” and ran eagerly about the unenclosed space, exploring the dry cavities into which she might have fallen, and then gazing with questioning dread at the smooth red surface of the water. The cold drops stood on his brow. How long had she been out? There was one hope—that she had crept through the stile and got into the fields, where he habitually took her to stroll. But the grass was high in the meadow, and there was no descrying her, if she were there, except by a close search that would be a trespass on Mr. Osgood’s crop. Still, that misdemeanour must be committed; and poor Silas, after peering all round the hedgerows, traversed the grass, beginning with perturbed vision to see Eppie behind every group of red sorrel, and to see her moving always farther off as he approached. The meadow was searched in vain; and he got over the stile into the next field, looking with dying hope towards a small pond which was now reduced to its summer shallowness, so as to leave a wide margin of good adhesive mud. Here, however, sat Eppie, discoursing cheerfully to her own small boot, which she was using as a bucket to convey the water into a deep hoof-mark, while her little naked foot was planted comfortably on a cushion of olive-green mud. A red-headed calf was observing her with alarmed doubt through the opposite hedge.
For example, he had smartly chosen a long strip of linen to secure her to his loom while he worked: it formed a wide belt around her waist and was long enough for her to reach the small bed and sit on it, but not long enough for her to try any risky climbing. One bright summer morning, Silas was more focused than usual on starting a new piece of work, when his scissors were needed. These scissors, due to a specific warning from Dolly, had been kept carefully out of Eppie's reach; however, the sound of them had a unique appeal to her ears, and watching the results of that sound taught her the thoughtful lesson that the same cause would bring about the same effect. Silas had settled himself at his loom, and the noise of weaving had started; but he had left his scissors on a ledge within Eppie's reach. Now, like a little mouse waiting for her chance, she quietly slipped from her corner, grabbed the scissors, and toddled back to the bed, adjusting her back to hide what she was doing. She clearly had a plan for the scissors; after cutting the linen strip in a jagged but effective way, she dashed out the open door where the sun was calling to her, while Silas thought she was being a particularly good child. It wasn’t until he needed his scissors that the awful truth hit him: Eppie had run out on her own—she might have fallen into the Stone-pit. Shaken by the worst fear imaginable, Silas rushed out, calling, “Eppie!” and searched the open area anxiously, looking into the dry places she might have fallen, and then staring with worried dread at the smooth red surface of the water. Cold sweat gathered on his brow. How long had she been outside? He held onto one hope—that she had slipped through the stile and made her way into the fields, where he usually took her for walks. But the grass was high in the meadow, and he wouldn’t be able to see her there without searching closely, which would be trespassing on Mr. Osgood’s crops. Still, he had to commit that offense; and poor Silas, after peering all around the hedgerows, crossed the grass, beginning to see Eppie behind every patch of red sorrel and imagining her moving farther away as he approached. He searched the meadow in vain, then climbed over the stile into the next field, glancing with fading hope toward a small pond that had shrunk to its summer shallowness, leaving a wide area of sticky mud. Here, however, sat Eppie, cheerfully talking to her little boot, which she was using as a bucket to scoop water into a deep hoof-mark, while her tiny bare foot was comfortably resting on a cushion of olive-green mud. A red-headed calf watched her with worried curiosity from the opposite hedge.
Here was clearly a case of aberration in a christened child which demanded severe treatment; but Silas, overcome with convulsive joy at finding his treasure again, could do nothing but snatch her up, and cover her with half-sobbing kisses. It was not until he had carried her home, and had begun to think of the necessary washing, that he recollected the need that he should punish Eppie, and “make her remember”. The idea that she might run away again and come to harm, gave him unusual resolution, and for the first time he determined to try the coal-hole—a small closet near the hearth.
Here was clearly a case of a messed-up situation with a child that required serious punishment; but Silas, overwhelmed with joy at finding his treasure again, could only scoop her up and shower her with half-sobbing kisses. It wasn't until he took her home and started thinking about the necessary bathing that he remembered he needed to punish Eppie and "make her understand." The thought that she might run away again and get hurt gave him an unusual determination, and for the first time, he decided to try the coal-hole—a small closet near the hearth.
“Naughty, naughty Eppie,” he suddenly began, holding her on his knee, and pointing to her muddy feet and clothes—“naughty to cut with the scissors and run away. Eppie must go into the coal-hole for being naughty. Daddy must put her in the coal-hole.”
“Naughty, naughty Eppie,” he suddenly said, holding her on his knee and pointing to her muddy feet and clothes—“it's naughty to cut with the scissors and run away. Eppie has to go into the coal-hole for being naughty. Daddy has to put her in the coal-hole.”
He half-expected that this would be shock enough, and that Eppie would begin to cry. But instead of that, she began to shake herself on his knee, as if the proposition opened a pleasing novelty. Seeing that he must proceed to extremities, he put her into the coal-hole, and held the door closed, with a trembling sense that he was using a strong measure. For a moment there was silence, but then came a little cry, “Opy, opy!” and Silas let her out again, saying, “Now Eppie ’ull never be naughty again, else she must go in the coal-hole—a black naughty place.”
He kind of thought this would be shocking enough, and that Eppie would start crying. But instead, she began wiggling on his knee, as if the idea was an exciting surprise. Realizing he needed to take drastic action, he put her in the coal-hole and closed the door, feeling a bit shaky about using such a strong tactic. For a moment there was silence, but then a little cry came, “Opy, opy!” So, Silas let her out again, saying, “Now Eppie won’t be naughty again, or she’ll have to go in the coal-hole—a dark, naughty place.”
The weaving must stand still a long while this morning, for now Eppie must be washed, and have clean clothes on; but it was to be hoped that this punishment would have a lasting effect, and save time in future—though, perhaps, it would have been better if Eppie had cried more.
The loom has to stay idle for a while this morning, because Eppie needs to be washed and put in clean clothes; but hopefully this punishment will have a lasting impact and save time later on—though maybe it would have been better if Eppie had cried more.
In half an hour she was clean again, and Silas having turned his back to see what he could do with the linen band, threw it down again, with the reflection that Eppie would be good without fastening for the rest of the morning. He turned round again, and was going to place her in her little chair near the loom, when she peeped out at him with black face and hands again, and said, “Eppie in de toal-hole!”
In half an hour, she was clean again, and Silas, having turned his back to figure out what to do with the linen band, tossed it aside, thinking Eppie would be fine without it for the rest of the morning. He turned back and was about to set her in her little chair by the loom when she peeked out at him with a dirty face and hands again, and said, “Eppie in the toilet hole!”
This total failure of the coal-hole discipline shook Silas’s belief in the efficacy of punishment. “She’d take it all for fun,” he observed to Dolly, “if I didn’t hurt her, and that I can’t do, Mrs. Winthrop. If she makes me a bit o’ trouble, I can bear it. And she’s got no tricks but what she’ll grow out of.”
This complete breakdown of the coal-hole discipline shook Silas’s confidence in punishment's effectiveness. “She’d enjoy it all,” he said to Dolly, “if I didn’t hurt her, and I can’t do that, Mrs. Winthrop. If she causes me some trouble, I can handle it. And she doesn’t have any tricks that she won’t outgrow.”
“Well, that’s partly true, Master Marner,” said Dolly, sympathetically; “and if you can’t bring your mind to frighten her off touching things, you must do what you can to keep ’em out of her way. That’s what I do wi’ the pups as the lads are allays a-rearing. They will worry and gnaw—worry and gnaw they will, if it was one’s Sunday cap as hung anywhere so as they could drag it. They know no difference, God help ’em: it’s the pushing o’ the teeth as sets ’em on, that’s what it is.”
“Well, that’s partly true, Master Marner,” said Dolly, sympathetically. “And if you can’t get her to stop touching things, you need to do what you can to keep them out of her way. That’s what I do with the pups that the boys are always raising. They will mess with and chew on anything—mess with and chew they will, even if it’s a Sunday cap hanging somewhere they can reach it. They don’t know the difference, poor things: it’s the pushing of their teeth that gets them started, that’s what it is.”
So Eppie was reared without punishment, the burden of her misdeeds being borne vicariously by father Silas. The stone hut was made a soft nest for her, lined with downy patience: and also in the world that lay beyond the stone hut she knew nothing of frowns and denials.
So Eppie was raised without punishment, with her father Silas taking on the consequences of her misbehavior. The stone hut was turned into a cozy nest for her, filled with soft patience; and in the world outside the stone hut, she remained unaware of frowns and refusals.
Notwithstanding the difficulty of carrying her and his yarn or linen at the same time, Silas took her with him in most of his journeys to the farmhouses, unwilling to leave her behind at Dolly Winthrop’s, who was always ready to take care of her; and little curly-headed Eppie, the weaver’s child, became an object of interest at several outlying homesteads, as well as in the village. Hitherto he had been treated very much as if he had been a useful gnome or brownie—a queer and unaccountable creature, who must necessarily be looked at with wondering curiosity and repulsion, and with whom one would be glad to make all greetings and bargains as brief as possible, but who must be dealt with in a propitiatory way, and occasionally have a present of pork or garden stuff to carry home with him, seeing that without him there was no getting the yarn woven. But now Silas met with open smiling faces and cheerful questioning, as a person whose satisfactions and difficulties could be understood. Everywhere he must sit a little and talk about the child, and words of interest were always ready for him: “Ah, Master Marner, you’ll be lucky if she takes the measles soon and easy!”—or, “Why, there isn’t many lone men ’ud ha’ been wishing to take up with a little un like that: but I reckon the weaving makes you handier than men as do out-door work—you’re partly as handy as a woman, for weaving comes next to spinning.” Elderly masters and mistresses, seated observantly in large kitchen arm-chairs, shook their heads over the difficulties attendant on rearing children, felt Eppie’s round arms and legs, and pronounced them remarkably firm, and told Silas that, if she turned out well (which, however, there was no telling), it would be a fine thing for him to have a steady lass to do for him when he got helpless. Servant maidens were fond of carrying her out to look at the hens and chickens, or to see if any cherries could be shaken down in the orchard; and the small boys and girls approached her slowly, with cautious movement and steady gaze, like little dogs face to face with one of their own kind, till attraction had reached the point at which the soft lips were put out for a kiss. No child was afraid of approaching Silas when Eppie was near him: there was no repulsion around him now, either for young or old; for the little child had come to link him once more with the whole world. There was love between him and the child that blent them into one, and there was love between the child and the world—from men and women with parental looks and tones, to the red lady-birds and the round pebbles.
Despite the challenge of carrying her and his yarn or linen at the same time, Silas took her with him on most of his trips to the farmhouses, unwilling to leave her behind at Dolly Winthrop’s, who was always ready to look after her. Little curly-headed Eppie, the weaver’s child, became a source of interest at several nearby homesteads, as well as in the village. Until now, he had been treated like a useful gnome or brownie—a strange and unexplainable creature, looked at with a mix of wonder and unease, and whom people preferred to keep greetings and deals brief with, but felt they needed to offer him a gesture of goodwill, like a bit of pork or garden produce to take home, since without him, there was no getting the yarn woven. But now Silas was greeted with open smiles and friendly questions, as someone whose challenges and joys could be understood. Everywhere he went, he had to sit for a bit and talk about the child, with words of interest always ready for him: “Ah, Master Marner, you’ll be lucky if she gets the measles soon and easily!”—or, “Well, not many lonely men would want to take on a little one like that: but I guess weaving makes you handier than men who do outdoor work—you’re almost as handy as a woman, since weaving comes right after spinning.” Older masters and mistresses, seated curiously in large kitchen armchairs, shook their heads over the challenges of raising children, felt Eppie’s strong little arms and legs, and told Silas that if she turned out well (which was uncertain), it would be great for him to have a reliable girl to help when he got old. Maidservants loved carrying her out to see the hens and chicks, or to check if any cherries could be shaken down in the orchard; and the small boys and girls approached her slowly, with careful movements and steady gazes, like little dogs meeting one of their own kind, until their curiosity reached the point where they leaned in for a kiss. No child was scared to approach Silas when Eppie was with him: there was no unease around him now, for young and old alike; the little child had reconnected him to the whole world. There was love between him and the child that united them, and there was love between the child and the world—from men and women with parental looks and tones to the red ladybugs and smooth pebbles.
Silas began now to think of Raveloe life entirely in relation to Eppie: she must have everything that was a good in Raveloe; and he listened docilely, that he might come to understand better what this life was, from which, for fifteen years, he had stood aloof as from a strange thing, with which he could have no communion: as some man who has a precious plant to which he would give a nurturing home in a new soil, thinks of the rain, and the sunshine, and all influences, in relation to his nursling, and asks industriously for all knowledge that will help him to satisfy the wants of the searching roots, or to guard leaf and bud from invading harm. The disposition to hoard had been utterly crushed at the very first by the loss of his long-stored gold: the coins he earned afterwards seemed as irrelevant as stones brought to complete a house suddenly buried by an earthquake; the sense of bereavement was too heavy upon him for the old thrill of satisfaction to arise again at the touch of the newly-earned coin. And now something had come to replace his hoard which gave a growing purpose to the earnings, drawing his hope and joy continually onward beyond the money.
Silas started to see life in Raveloe completely through the lens of Eppie: she needed to have everything good in Raveloe. He listened patiently so he could better understand this life, which he had kept himself apart from for fifteen years, like someone who has a valuable plant that he wants to nurture in new soil thinks about the rain, sunshine, and everything that impacts it, and actively seeks knowledge to meet the needs of the roots or protect the leaves and buds from harm. The urge to hoard had been completely crushed right from the start by the loss of his long-saved gold: the coins he earned afterward felt as pointless as stones brought to finish a house that had been suddenly buried by an earthquake; the weight of his loss was too much for the old thrill of satisfaction to return with the touch of the newly earned coins. Now, something had replaced his hoard that gave a growing purpose to his earnings, pulling his hope and joy continually forward beyond the money.
In old days there were angels who came and took men by the hand and led them away from the city of destruction. We see no white-winged angels now. But yet men are led away from threatening destruction: a hand is put into theirs, which leads them forth gently towards a calm and bright land, so that they look no more backward; and the hand may be a little child’s.
In the past, there were angels who came and took people by the hand, guiding them away from the city of destruction. We don't see any white-winged angels now, but people are still being led away from looming disaster: a hand is placed in theirs, gently steering them towards a peaceful and bright place, so that they no longer look back; and that hand could belong to a little child.
CHAPTER XV.
There was one person, as you will believe, who watched with keener though more hidden interest than any other, the prosperous growth of Eppie under the weaver’s care. He dared not do anything that would imply a stronger interest in a poor man’s adopted child than could be expected from the kindliness of the young Squire, when a chance meeting suggested a little present to a simple old fellow whom others noticed with goodwill; but he told himself that the time would come when he might do something towards furthering the welfare of his daughter without incurring suspicion. Was he very uneasy in the meantime at his inability to give his daughter her birthright? I cannot say that he was. The child was being taken care of, and would very likely be happy, as people in humble stations often were—happier, perhaps, than those brought up in luxury.
There was one person, as you can imagine, who watched with a sharper but more hidden interest than anyone else, the healthy growth of Eppie under the weaver’s care. He didn’t dare show any more of an interest in a poor man’s adopted child than what would be expected from the kindness of the young Squire, especially when a chance encounter inspired a small gift for a simple old man whom others acknowledged with goodwill; but he reassured himself that the day would come when he could do something to support his daughter’s well-being without raising any suspicions. Was he very bothered in the meantime by his inability to give his daughter her birthright? I can’t say that he was. The child was being well taken care of and would likely be happy, as people in humble situations often were—possibly happier than those raised in luxury.
That famous ring that pricked its owner when he forgot duty and followed desire—I wonder if it pricked very hard when he set out on the chase, or whether it pricked but lightly then, and only pierced to the quick when the chase had long been ended, and hope, folding her wings, looked backward and became regret?
That famous ring that stabbed its owner when he forgot his responsibilities and followed his desires—I wonder if it hurt a lot when he started the chase, or if it only poked him gently at first, and then really hurt once the chase was over, and hope, having given up, looked back and turned into regret?
Godfrey Cass’s cheek and eye were brighter than ever now. He was so undivided in his aims, that he seemed like a man of firmness. No Dunsey had come back: people had made up their minds that he was gone for a soldier, or gone “out of the country,” and no one cared to be specific in their inquiries on a subject delicate to a respectable family. Godfrey had ceased to see the shadow of Dunsey across his path; and the path now lay straight forward to the accomplishment of his best, longest-cherished wishes. Everybody said Mr. Godfrey had taken the right turn; and it was pretty clear what would be the end of things, for there were not many days in the week that he was not seen riding to the Warrens. Godfrey himself, when he was asked jocosely if the day had been fixed, smiled with the pleasant consciousness of a lover who could say “yes,” if he liked. He felt a reformed man, delivered from temptation; and the vision of his future life seemed to him as a promised land for which he had no cause to fight. He saw himself with all his happiness centred on his own hearth, while Nancy would smile on him as he played with the children.
Godfrey Cass’s cheek and eye were brighter than ever now. He was so focused on his goals that he seemed like a man of determination. No one had seen Dunsey come back: people assumed he had gone off to join the army or had left the country, and no one wanted to get into specifics about a topic that was sensitive for a respectable family. Godfrey had stopped noticing Dunsey’s shadow looming over his life; now, the path ahead was clear toward achieving his deepest, long-held dreams. Everyone said Mr. Godfrey had made the right choice; it was pretty obvious what the outcome would be, as there weren't many days in the week that he wasn't seen riding to the Warrens. When Godfrey was jokingly asked if the date had been set, he smiled, feeling like a lover who could easily say “yes” if he wanted. He felt like a changed man, freed from temptation; the vision of his future life seemed to him like a promised land that he had no need to fight for. He pictured himself with all his happiness centered in his own home, while Nancy smiled at him as he played with the kids.
And that other child—not on the hearth—he would not forget it; he would see that it was well provided for. That was a father’s duty.
And that other child—not near the fireplace—he wouldn't forget it; he would make sure it was well taken care of. That was a father's responsibility.
CHAPTER XVI.
It was a bright autumn Sunday, sixteen years after Silas Marner had found his new treasure on the hearth. The bells of the old Raveloe church were ringing the cheerful peal which told that the morning service was ended; and out of the arched doorway in the tower came slowly, retarded by friendly greetings and questions, the richer parishioners who had chosen this bright Sunday morning as eligible for church-going. It was the rural fashion of that time for the more important members of the congregation to depart first, while their humbler neighbours waited and looked on, stroking their bent heads or dropping their curtsies to any large ratepayer who turned to notice them.
It was a bright autumn Sunday, sixteen years after Silas Marner found his new treasure on the hearth. The bells of the old Raveloe church were ringing their joyful chimes, signaling that the morning service had ended; and out of the arched doorway in the tower came the wealthier parishioners, slowly making their way out, held up by friendly greetings and questions. They had picked this lovely Sunday morning as a good time for church. At that time in rural life, it was common for the more prominent members of the congregation to leave first, while their less affluent neighbors waited and watched, bowing their heads or curtsying to any significant tax payer who turned to acknowledge them.
Foremost among these advancing groups of well-clad people, there are some whom we shall recognize, in spite of Time, who has laid his hand on them all. The tall blond man of forty is not much changed in feature from the Godfrey Cass of six-and-twenty: he is only fuller in flesh, and has only lost the indefinable look of youth—a loss which is marked even when the eye is undulled and the wrinkles are not yet come. Perhaps the pretty woman, not much younger than he, who is leaning on his arm, is more changed than her husband: the lovely bloom that used to be always on her cheek now comes but fitfully, with the fresh morning air or with some strong surprise; yet to all who love human faces best for what they tell of human experience, Nancy’s beauty has a heightened interest. Often the soul is ripened into fuller goodness while age has spread an ugly film, so that mere glances can never divine the preciousness of the fruit. But the years have not been so cruel to Nancy. The firm yet placid mouth, the clear veracious glance of the brown eyes, speak now of a nature that has been tested and has kept its highest qualities; and even the costume, with its dainty neatness and purity, has more significance now the coquetries of youth can have nothing to do with it.
At the front of the group of well-dressed people, there are some we’ll recognize, despite the passage of time that has touched them all. The tall, blond man in his forties hasn’t changed much from Godfrey Cass at twenty-six; he’s only fuller in build and has lost that undefinable youthful look—something that’s noticeable even when his eyes are still sharp and he hasn’t developed wrinkles yet. Perhaps the pretty woman, only a bit younger than him, who’s leaning on his arm, has changed more than her husband: the lovely glow that used to be constant on her cheeks now appears only occasionally, with the fresh morning air or unexpected surprises; yet for everyone who appreciates human faces for what they reveal about life, Nancy’s beauty is now even more intriguing. Often, a person's soul matures into greater goodness while age can add an unpleasant layer, making it hard to see the true value within. But the years haven’t been as harsh on Nancy. Her firm yet calm mouth and the honest gaze of her brown eyes now reflect a character that has been tested and maintained its best qualities; even her outfit, with its delicate neatness and purity, holds more meaning now that the flirtations of youth are behind her.
Mr. and Mrs. Godfrey Cass (any higher title has died away from Raveloe lips since the old Squire was gathered to his fathers and his inheritance was divided) have turned round to look for the tall aged man and the plainly dressed woman who are a little behind—Nancy having observed that they must wait for “father and Priscilla”—and now they all turn into a narrower path leading across the churchyard to a small gate opposite the Red House. We will not follow them now; for may there not be some others in this departing congregation whom we should like to see again—some of those who are not likely to be handsomely clad, and whom we may not recognize so easily as the master and mistress of the Red House?
Mr. and Mrs. Godfrey Cass (no one around here uses any higher titles since the old Squire passed away and his estate was divided) have turned to look for the tall elderly man and the simply dressed woman who are a bit behind—Nancy has pointed out that they need to wait for “father and Priscilla”—and now they all head into a narrower path that goes through the churchyard to a small gate across from the Red House. We won’t follow them right now; after all, there might be others in this departing congregation who we’d like to see again—some of those not likely to be dressed well, and whom we might not recognize as easily as the master and mistress of the Red House?
But it is impossible to mistake Silas Marner. His large brown eyes seem to have gathered a longer vision, as is the way with eyes that have been short-sighted in early life, and they have a less vague, a more answering gaze; but in everything else one sees signs of a frame much enfeebled by the lapse of the sixteen years. The weaver’s bent shoulders and white hair give him almost the look of advanced age, though he is not more than five-and-fifty; but there is the freshest blossom of youth close by his side—a blonde dimpled girl of eighteen, who has vainly tried to chastise her curly auburn hair into smoothness under her brown bonnet: the hair ripples as obstinately as a brooklet under the March breeze, and the little ringlets burst away from the restraining comb behind and show themselves below the bonnet-crown. Eppie cannot help being rather vexed about her hair, for there is no other girl in Raveloe who has hair at all like it, and she thinks hair ought to be smooth. She does not like to be blameworthy even in small things: you see how neatly her prayer-book is folded in her spotted handkerchief.
But it's impossible to mistake Silas Marner. His large brown eyes seem to have gained a broader perspective, like eyes that were once nearsighted, and they have a clearer, more engaging gaze; but in every other way, you can see signs of a body weakened by the passage of sixteen years. The weaver’s stooped shoulders and white hair give him the appearance of being much older, even though he’s only in his fifties; yet there is a vibrant blossom of youth right by his side—a blonde, dimpled girl of eighteen, who has tried in vain to tame her curly auburn hair under her brown bonnet: her hair flows as stubbornly as a stream in a March breeze, with little ringlets escaping from the restraining comb behind and peeking out from below the bonnet's crown. Eppie can’t help but feel a bit frustrated about her hair, as there isn’t another girl in Raveloe with hair like hers, and she thinks hair should be smooth. She doesn’t like to feel guilty, even about minor things: you can see how neatly her prayer book is folded in her spotted handkerchief.
That good-looking young fellow, in a new fustian suit, who walks behind her, is not quite sure upon the question of hair in the abstract, when Eppie puts it to him, and thinks that perhaps straight hair is the best in general, but he doesn’t want Eppie’s hair to be different. She surely divines that there is some one behind her who is thinking about her very particularly, and mustering courage to come to her side as soon as they are out in the lane, else why should she look rather shy, and take care not to turn away her head from her father Silas, to whom she keeps murmuring little sentences as to who was at church and who was not at church, and how pretty the red mountain-ash is over the Rectory wall?
That good-looking young guy in the new fabric suit, who’s walking behind her, is unsure about the whole hair debate when Eppie asks him. He thinks maybe straight hair is generally the best, but he doesn’t want Eppie’s hair to be any different. She seems to sense that someone is behind her, thinking about her in a special way, and gearing up the courage to join her as soon as they’re out on the path. Otherwise, why would she look a bit shy and make sure not to turn away from her father, Silas? She keeps quietly chatting with him about who was at church and who wasn’t, and how pretty the red mountain-ash looks over the Rectory wall.
“I wish we had a little garden, father, with double daisies in, like Mrs. Winthrop’s,” said Eppie, when they were out in the lane; “only they say it ’ud take a deal of digging and bringing fresh soil—and you couldn’t do that, could you, father? Anyhow, I shouldn’t like you to do it, for it ’ud be too hard work for you.”
“I wish we had a little garden, Dad, with double daisies in it, like Mrs. Winthrop’s,” said Eppie, when they were out in the lane; “but they say it would take a lot of digging and bringing in fresh soil—and you couldn’t do that, could you, Dad? Anyway, I wouldn’t want you to, because it would be too much hard work for you.”
“Yes, I could do it, child, if you want a bit o’ garden: these long evenings, I could work at taking in a little bit o’ the waste, just enough for a root or two o’ flowers for you; and again, i’ the morning, I could have a turn wi’ the spade before I sat down to the loom. Why didn’t you tell me before as you wanted a bit o’ garden?”
“Yes, I could do it, kid, if you want a little garden: these long evenings, I could spend some time clearing out a bit of the waste, just enough for a root or two of flowers for you; and again, in the morning, I could have a go with the spade before I sit down at the loom. Why didn’t you tell me earlier that you wanted a little garden?”
“I can dig it for you, Master Marner,” said the young man in fustian, who was now by Eppie’s side, entering into the conversation without the trouble of formalities. “It’ll be play to me after I’ve done my day’s work, or any odd bits o’ time when the work’s slack. And I’ll bring you some soil from Mr. Cass’s garden—he’ll let me, and willing.”
“I can handle that for you, Master Marner,” said the young man in tough fabric, who was now next to Eppie, joining the conversation without any formalities. “It’ll be easy for me once I finish my day’s work, or during any free moments when things are slow. And I’ll bring you some soil from Mr. Cass’s garden—he’ll let me, no problem.”
“Eh, Aaron, my lad, are you there?” said Silas; “I wasn’t aware of you; for when Eppie’s talking o’ things, I see nothing but what she’s a-saying. Well, if you could help me with the digging, we might get her a bit o’ garden all the sooner.”
“Hey, Aaron, are you there?” said Silas. “I didn't notice you; when Eppie's talking about stuff, I can’t focus on anything else. Well, if you could help me with the digging, we might be able to get her a little garden sooner.”
“Then, if you think well and good,” said Aaron, “I’ll come to the Stone-pits this afternoon, and we’ll settle what land’s to be taken in, and I’ll get up an hour earlier i’ the morning, and begin on it.”
“Then, if that sounds good to you,” said Aaron, “I’ll come to the Stone-pits this afternoon, and we’ll figure out which land needs to be included, and I’ll wake up an hour earlier in the morning and start on it.”
“But not if you don’t promise me not to work at the hard digging, father,” said Eppie. “For I shouldn’t ha’ said anything about it,” she added, half-bashfully, half-roguishly, “only Mrs. Winthrop said as Aaron ’ud be so good, and—”
“But not if you don’t promise me not to do the hard digging, dad,” said Eppie. “I wouldn’t have said anything about it,” she added, a little shyly and a little playfully, “only Mrs. Winthrop said that Aaron would be so nice, and—”
“And you might ha’ known it without mother telling you,” said Aaron. “And Master Marner knows too, I hope, as I’m able and willing to do a turn o’ work for him, and he won’t do me the unkindness to anyways take it out o’ my hands.”
“And you might have known it without your mother telling you,” said Aaron. “And I hope Master Marner knows too that I'm able and willing to do some work for him, and he won’t be unkind enough to take it out of my hands.”
“There, now, father, you won’t work in it till it’s all easy,” said Eppie, “and you and me can mark out the beds, and make holes and plant the roots. It’ll be a deal livelier at the Stone-pits when we’ve got some flowers, for I always think the flowers can see us and know what we’re talking about. And I’ll have a bit o’ rosemary, and bergamot, and thyme, because they’re so sweet-smelling; but there’s no lavender only in the gentlefolks’ gardens, I think.”
“There you go, Dad, you won’t have to dig until it’s all nice and easy,” Eppie said, “and you and I can layout the flower beds, dig holes, and plant the roots. It’ll be so much brighter at the Stone-pits once we have some flowers because I always feel like the flowers can see us and understand what we’re saying. And I want to grow some rosemary, bergamot, and thyme because they smell so good; but I think the only lavender is in the fancy folks’ gardens.”
“That’s no reason why you shouldn’t have some,” said Aaron, “for I can bring you slips of anything; I’m forced to cut no end of ’em when I’m gardening, and throw ’em away mostly. There’s a big bed o’ lavender at the Red House: the missis is very fond of it.”
"That’s no reason you shouldn’t have some,” said Aaron, “because I can get you cuttings of anything; I have to trim a ton of them when I’m gardening, and I usually just toss them. There’s a big patch of lavender at the Red House: the lady of the house really likes it.”
“Well,” said Silas, gravely, “so as you don’t make free for us, or ask for anything as is worth much at the Red House: for Mr. Cass’s been so good to us, and built us up the new end o’ the cottage, and given us beds and things, as I couldn’t abide to be imposin’ for garden-stuff or anything else.”
“Well,” said Silas, seriously, “just don’t take advantage of us or ask for anything that’s worth a lot at the Red House: Mr. Cass has been so good to us, built the new end of the cottage, and provided us with beds and other things, so I wouldn't feel right imposing for garden stuff or anything else.”
“No, no, there’s no imposin,’” said Aaron; “there’s never a garden in all the parish but what there’s endless waste in it for want o’ somebody as could use everything up. It’s what I think to myself sometimes, as there need nobody run short o’ victuals if the land was made the most on, and there was never a morsel but what could find its way to a mouth. It sets one thinking o’ that—gardening does. But I must go back now, else mother ’ull be in trouble as I aren’t there.”
“No, no, there’s no need to worry,” said Aaron; “there’s never a garden in the whole parish that doesn’t have plenty of waste because there’s no one around to make use of everything. I sometimes think that no one should ever run out of food if the land was used properly, and there’s never a scrap that couldn’t find its way to someone’s plate. It really makes you think about that—gardening does. But I need to head back now, or my mom will be in a panic because I'm not home.”
“Bring her with you this afternoon, Aaron,” said Eppie; “I shouldn’t like to fix about the garden, and her not know everything from the first—should you, father?”
“Bring her with you this afternoon, Aaron,” Eppie said. “I wouldn’t want to make plans for the garden without her knowing everything from the start—would you, dad?”
“Aye, bring her if you can, Aaron,” said Silas; “she’s sure to have a word to say as’ll help us to set things on their right end.”
“Yeah, bring her if you can, Aaron,” said Silas; “she’s definitely got something to say that will help us get things sorted out.”
Aaron turned back up the village, while Silas and Eppie went on up the lonely sheltered lane.
Aaron walked back up to the village, while Silas and Eppie continued up the quiet, sheltered lane.
“O daddy!” she began, when they were in privacy, clasping and squeezing Silas’s arm, and skipping round to give him an energetic kiss. “My little old daddy! I’m so glad. I don’t think I shall want anything else when we’ve got a little garden; and I knew Aaron would dig it for us,” she went on with roguish triumph—“I knew that very well.”
“O Daddy!” she started, once they were alone, hugging and squeezing Silas’s arm, and skipping around to give him an enthusiastic kiss. “My little old Daddy! I’m so happy. I don’t think I’ll want anything else when we have a little garden; and I knew Aaron would dig it for us,” she continued with playful triumph—“I knew that for sure.”
“You’re a deep little puss, you are,” said Silas, with the mild passive happiness of love-crowned age in his face; “but you’ll make yourself fine and beholden to Aaron.”
“You're a deep little cat, you are,” said Silas, with the gentle, content happiness of love in his eyes; “but you'll end up feeling pretty grateful to Aaron.”
“Oh, no, I shan’t,” said Eppie, laughing and frisking; “he likes it.”
“Oh, no, I won’t,” said Eppie, laughing and skipping around; “he enjoys it.”
“Come, come, let me carry your prayer-book, else you’ll be dropping it, jumping i’ that way.”
“Come on, let me hold your prayer book, or you’re going to drop it while you’re jumping around like that.”
Eppie was now aware that her behaviour was under observation, but it was only the observation of a friendly donkey, browsing with a log fastened to his foot—a meek donkey, not scornfully critical of human trivialities, but thankful to share in them, if possible, by getting his nose scratched; and Eppie did not fail to gratify him with her usual notice, though it was attended with the inconvenience of his following them, painfully, up to the very door of their home.
Eppie now realized that someone was watching her, but it was just a friendly donkey, munching on grass with a log tied to his foot—a gentle donkey, not harshly judging human silliness, but happy to be included, if possible, by getting his nose rubbed. Eppie made sure to give him her usual attention, although it did mean he would awkwardly follow them right to the door of their home.
But the sound of a sharp bark inside, as Eppie put the key in the door, modified the donkey’s views, and he limped away again without bidding. The sharp bark was the sign of an excited welcome that was awaiting them from a knowing brown terrier, who, after dancing at their legs in a hysterical manner, rushed with a worrying noise at a tortoise-shell kitten under the loom, and then rushed back with a sharp bark again, as much as to say, “I have done my duty by this feeble creature, you perceive”; while the lady-mother of the kitten sat sunning her white bosom in the window, and looked round with a sleepy air of expecting caresses, though she was not going to take any trouble for them.
But the sound of a sharp bark inside, as Eppie put the key in the door, changed the donkey's mind, and he limped away again without a word. The sharp bark meant there was an excited welcome waiting for them from a brown terrier who, after bouncing around their legs in an overly enthusiastic way, rushed with a worried noise at a tortoiseshell kitten under the loom, then came back with another sharp bark, as if to say, “I've done my duty for this little creature, you see”; while the kitten's mother lounged in the window, sunning her white belly, looking around with a sleepy expression as if expecting affection, even though she wasn’t going to make any effort for it.
The presence of this happy animal life was not the only change which had come over the interior of the stone cottage. There was no bed now in the living-room, and the small space was well filled with decent furniture, all bright and clean enough to satisfy Dolly Winthrop’s eye. The oaken table and three-cornered oaken chair were hardly what was likely to be seen in so poor a cottage: they had come, with the beds and other things, from the Red House; for Mr. Godfrey Cass, as every one said in the village, did very kindly by the weaver; and it was nothing but right a man should be looked on and helped by those who could afford it, when he had brought up an orphan child, and been father and mother to her—and had lost his money too, so as he had nothing but what he worked for week by week, and when the weaving was going down too—for there was less and less flax spun—and Master Marner was none so young. Nobody was jealous of the weaver, for he was regarded as an exceptional person, whose claims on neighbourly help were not to be matched in Raveloe. Any superstition that remained concerning him had taken an entirely new colour; and Mr. Macey, now a very feeble old man of fourscore and six, never seen except in his chimney-corner or sitting in the sunshine at his door-sill, was of opinion that when a man had done what Silas had done by an orphan child, it was a sign that his money would come to light again, or leastwise that the robber would be made to answer for it—for, as Mr. Macey observed of himself, his faculties were as strong as ever.
The cheerful animal life wasn’t the only change that had taken place inside the stone cottage. There was no bed in the living room anymore, and the small space was furnished with nice, clean furniture that would please Dolly Winthrop’s eye. The oak table and three-cornered oak chair were hardly what you would expect to find in such a humble cottage; they had come, along with the beds and other items, from the Red House. Mr. Godfrey Cass, as everyone in the village said, was very kind to the weaver, and it was only right for those who could afford it to help a man who had raised an orphaned child and had been both father and mother to her—especially when he had lost his money and was living on what he earned week by week, particularly since weaving was declining—with less and less flax being spun—and Master Marner wasn’t getting any younger. No one was jealous of the weaver; he was seen as an exceptional person whose need for help from neighbors was unmatched in Raveloe. Any remaining superstitions about him had taken on a completely new perspective, and Mr. Macey, now a frail old man of eighty-six, who was only seen in his favorite spot by the fireplace or sitting in the sun at his doorstep, believed that when a man had done what Silas had done for an orphan, it was a sign that his money would eventually come back, or at the very least, that the thief would have to answer for it—because, as Mr. Macey remarked about himself, his mind was still as sharp as ever.
Silas sat down now and watched Eppie with a satisfied gaze as she spread the clean cloth, and set on it the potato-pie, warmed up slowly in a safe Sunday fashion, by being put into a dry pot over a slowly-dying fire, as the best substitute for an oven. For Silas would not consent to have a grate and oven added to his conveniences: he loved the old brick hearth as he had loved his brown pot—and was it not there when he had found Eppie? The gods of the hearth exist for us still; and let all new faith be tolerant of that fetishism, lest it bruise its own roots.
Silas sat down and watched Eppie with a satisfied look as she laid out the clean cloth and placed the potato pie on it, warmed up slowly in a classic Sunday way, by putting it in a dry pot over a slowly dying fire, as the best alternative to an oven. Silas refused to have a grate and oven added to his setup: he loved the old brick hearth just as he had loved his brown pot—and wasn't it there when he found Eppie? The spirit of the hearth still exists for us; and may all new beliefs be accepting of that tradition, so it doesn't damage its own roots.
Silas ate his dinner more silently than usual, soon laying down his knife and fork, and watching half-abstractedly Eppie’s play with Snap and the cat, by which her own dining was made rather a lengthy business. Yet it was a sight that might well arrest wandering thoughts: Eppie, with the rippling radiance of her hair and the whiteness of her rounded chin and throat set off by the dark-blue cotton gown, laughing merrily as the kitten held on with her four claws to one shoulder, like a design for a jug-handle, while Snap on the right hand and Puss on the other put up their paws towards a morsel which she held out of the reach of both—Snap occasionally desisting in order to remonstrate with the cat by a cogent worrying growl on the greediness and futility of her conduct; till Eppie relented, caressed them both, and divided the morsel between them.
Silas ate his dinner more quietly than usual, soon putting down his knife and fork, and watching Eppie play with Snap and the cat, which made her own mealtime stretch out. But it was a scene that could easily capture anyone's attention: Eppie, with her shimmering hair and the white of her rounded chin and neck highlighted by her dark-blue cotton dress, laughing joyfully as the kitten clung to one shoulder like a handle on a jug, while Snap on one side and Puss on the other raised their paws toward a treat she was holding just out of reach—Snap sometimes stopping to growl disapprovingly at the cat for being greedy and pointless in her actions; until Eppie finally gave in, petted them both, and shared the treat between them.
But at last Eppie, glancing at the clock, checked the play, and said, “O daddy, you’re wanting to go into the sunshine to smoke your pipe. But I must clear away first, so as the house may be tidy when godmother comes. I’ll make haste—I won’t be long.”
But finally Eppie, looking at the clock, interrupted the scene and said, “Oh daddy, you want to go outside to smoke your pipe. But I have to clean up first so the house is tidy when godmother arrives. I’ll hurry—I won’t take long.”
Silas had taken to smoking a pipe daily during the last two years, having been strongly urged to it by the sages of Raveloe, as a practice “good for the fits”; and this advice was sanctioned by Dr. Kimble, on the ground that it was as well to try what could do no harm—a principle which was made to answer for a great deal of work in that gentleman’s medical practice. Silas did not highly enjoy smoking, and often wondered how his neighbours could be so fond of it; but a humble sort of acquiescence in what was held to be good, had become a strong habit of that new self which had been developed in him since he had found Eppie on his hearth: it had been the only clew his bewildered mind could hold by in cherishing this young life that had been sent to him out of the darkness into which his gold had departed. By seeking what was needful for Eppie, by sharing the effect that everything produced on her, he had himself come to appropriate the forms of custom and belief which were the mould of Raveloe life; and as, with reawakening sensibilities, memory also reawakened, he had begun to ponder over the elements of his old faith, and blend them with his new impressions, till he recovered a consciousness of unity between his past and present. The sense of presiding goodness and the human trust which come with all pure peace and joy, had given him a dim impression that there had been some error, some mistake, which had thrown that dark shadow over the days of his best years; and as it grew more and more easy to him to open his mind to Dolly Winthrop, he gradually communicated to her all he could describe of his early life. The communication was necessarily a slow and difficult process, for Silas’s meagre power of explanation was not aided by any readiness of interpretation in Dolly, whose narrow outward experience gave her no key to strange customs, and made every novelty a source of wonder that arrested them at every step of the narrative. It was only by fragments, and at intervals which left Dolly time to revolve what she had heard till it acquired some familiarity for her, that Silas at last arrived at the climax of the sad story—the drawing of lots, and its false testimony concerning him; and this had to be repeated in several interviews, under new questions on her part as to the nature of this plan for detecting the guilty and clearing the innocent.
Silas had started smoking a pipe every day for the past two years after being strongly encouraged to do so by the wise folks of Raveloe, who said it was “good for the fits.” This advice was backed by Dr. Kimble, who believed it was worth trying if it couldn’t do any harm—a principle that justified much of his medical practice. Silas didn’t particularly enjoy smoking and often wondered how his neighbors liked it so much. However, he had developed a humble acceptance of what was considered good, which had become a strong habit since finding Eppie on his doorstep. It was the only connection he could cling to as he nurtured this young life that had come to him after his gold had left. By seeking what was necessary for Eppie and observing how everything affected her, he started to adopt the customs and beliefs that shaped life in Raveloe. As his feelings began to awaken again, so did his memories, leading him to think about the elements of his old faith and blend them with his new experiences until he felt a sense of unity between his past and present. The sense of goodness and human connection that comes with pure peace and joy gave him a vague feeling that there had been some error or mistake that cast a shadow over the best years of his life. As it became easier for him to open up to Dolly Winthrop, he gradually shared everything he could recall about his early life. This communication was slow and challenging because Silas’s limited ability to explain was not matched by Dolly’s readiness to understand, as her narrow experiences offered her no insight into strange customs, making every new idea a source of wonder that paused the narrative. Eventually, he shared the climax of the sad story—the drawing of lots and the false testimony against him. This had to be repeated over several meetings, with Dolly asking new questions about the method used to find the guilty and prove the innocent.
“And yourn’s the same Bible, you’re sure o’ that, Master Marner—the Bible as you brought wi’ you from that country—it’s the same as what they’ve got at church, and what Eppie’s a-learning to read in?”
“And yours is the same Bible, you’re sure of that, Master Marner—the Bible you brought with you from that country—it’s the same as what they have at church, and what Eppie is learning to read from?”
“Yes,” said Silas, “every bit the same; and there’s drawing o’ lots in the Bible, mind you,” he added in a lower tone.
“Yes,” said Silas, “just like that; and there's drawing lots in the Bible, you know,” he added in a quieter voice.
“Oh, dear, dear,” said Dolly in a grieved voice, as if she were hearing an unfavourable report of a sick man’s case. She was silent for some minutes; at last she said—
“Oh, dear, dear,” said Dolly in a sad voice, as if she were hearing bad news about a sick man’s condition. She was quiet for a few minutes; finally, she said—
“There’s wise folks, happen, as know how it all is; the parson knows, I’ll be bound; but it takes big words to tell them things, and such as poor folks can’t make much out on. I can never rightly know the meaning o’ what I hear at church, only a bit here and there, but I know it’s good words—I do. But what lies upo’ your mind—it’s this, Master Marner: as, if Them above had done the right thing by you, They’d never ha’ let you be turned out for a wicked thief when you was innicent.”
"There are wise people who understand how everything is; the minister knows, I’m sure of it; but it takes fancy words to explain things, and poor folks can’t make much sense of them. I can never fully grasp the meaning of what I hear at church, just little bits here and there, but I know it's good stuff—I really do. But what’s on your mind is this, Master Marner: If those up above had treated you fairly, They would have never let you be accused of being a wicked thief when you were innocent."
“Ah!” said Silas, who had now come to understand Dolly’s phraseology, “that was what fell on me like as if it had been red-hot iron; because, you see, there was nobody as cared for me or clave to me above nor below. And him as I’d gone out and in wi’ for ten year and more, since when we was lads and went halves—mine own familiar friend in whom I trusted, had lifted up his heel again’ me, and worked to ruin me.”
“Ah!” said Silas, who had now come to understand Dolly’s way of speaking, “that hit me like it was red-hot iron; because, you see, there was no one who cared for me or stuck by me, neither above nor below. And the guy I had spent the last ten years with, since we were kids and shared everything—my own close friend whom I trusted—had turned against me and conspired to destroy me.”
“Eh, but he was a bad un—I can’t think as there’s another such,” said Dolly. “But I’m o’ercome, Master Marner; I’m like as if I’d waked and didn’t know whether it was night or morning. I feel somehow as sure as I do when I’ve laid something up though I can’t justly put my hand on it, as there was a rights in what happened to you, if one could but make it out; and you’d no call to lose heart as you did. But we’ll talk on it again; for sometimes things come into my head when I’m leeching or poulticing, or such, as I could never think on when I was sitting still.”
“Yeah, but he was really bad—I can't think of anyone worse,” said Dolly. “But I’m overwhelmed, Master Marner; I feel like I’ve just woken up and can’t tell if it’s night or morning. I feel certain, just like when I've stored something away even if I can't quite put my finger on it, that there was a reason for what happened to you, if only we could figure it out; and you had no reason to lose heart like you did. But we’ll talk about it again because sometimes thoughts come to me when I’m doing things like treating wounds or making poultices that I could never come up with while just sitting still.”
Dolly was too useful a woman not to have many opportunities of illumination of the kind she alluded to, and she was not long before she recurred to the subject.
Dolly was too valuable of a person not to have plenty of chances for the kind of insight she mentioned, and it wasn't long before she brought the topic up again.
“Master Marner,” she said, one day that she came to bring home Eppie’s washing, “I’ve been sore puzzled for a good bit wi’ that trouble o’ yourn and the drawing o’ lots; and it got twisted back’ards and for’ards, as I didn’t know which end to lay hold on. But it come to me all clear like, that night when I was sitting up wi’ poor Bessy Fawkes, as is dead and left her children behind, God help ’em—it come to me as clear as daylight; but whether I’ve got hold on it now, or can anyways bring it to my tongue’s end, that I don’t know. For I’ve often a deal inside me as’ll never come out; and for what you talk o’ your folks in your old country niver saying prayers by heart nor saying ’em out of a book, they must be wonderful cliver; for if I didn’t know ‘Our Father,’ and little bits o’ good words as I can carry out o’ church wi’ me, I might down o’ my knees every night, but nothing could I say.”
“Master Marner,” she said one day when she came to pick up Eppie’s laundry, “I’ve been really confused for a while about your trouble and the drawing of lots; it got so tangled that I didn’t know where to start. But it all became clear to me that night when I was sitting up with poor Bessy Fawkes, who has passed and left her children behind, God help them—it came to me as clearly as day; but whether I can remember it now or express it properly, I can’t say. I often have a lot of thoughts inside me that never come out; and as for what you said about your people in your old country never saying prayers from memory or from a book, they must be very clever; because if I didn’t know 'Our Father' and a few little good phrases I can remember from church, I could kneel down every night, but I wouldn’t be able to say anything.”
“But you can mostly say something as I can make sense on, Mrs. Winthrop,” said Silas.
"But you can mostly say something I can understand, Mrs. Winthrop," said Silas.
“Well, then, Master Marner, it come to me summat like this: I can make nothing o’ the drawing o’ lots and the answer coming wrong; it ’ud mayhap take the parson to tell that, and he could only tell us i’ big words. But what come to me as clear as the daylight, it was when I was troubling over poor Bessy Fawkes, and it allays comes into my head when I’m sorry for folks, and feel as I can’t do a power to help ’em, not if I was to get up i’ the middle o’ the night—it comes into my head as Them above has got a deal tenderer heart nor what I’ve got—for I can’t be anyways better nor Them as made me; and if anything looks hard to me, it’s because there’s things I don’t know on; and for the matter o’ that, there may be plenty o’ things I don’t know on, for it’s little as I know—that it is. And so, while I was thinking o’ that, you come into my mind, Master Marner, and it all come pouring in:—if I felt i’ my inside what was the right and just thing by you, and them as prayed and drawed the lots, all but that wicked un, if they’d ha’ done the right thing by you if they could, isn’t there Them as was at the making on us, and knows better and has a better will? And that’s all as ever I can be sure on, and everything else is a big puzzle to me when I think on it. For there was the fever come and took off them as were full-growed, and left the helpless children; and there’s the breaking o’ limbs; and them as ’ud do right and be sober have to suffer by them as are contrairy—eh, there’s trouble i’ this world, and there’s things as we can niver make out the rights on. And all as we’ve got to do is to trusten, Master Marner—to do the right thing as fur as we know, and to trusten. For if us as knows so little can see a bit o’ good and rights, we may be sure as there’s a good and a rights bigger nor what we can know—I feel it i’ my own inside as it must be so. And if you could but ha’ gone on trustening, Master Marner, you wouldn’t ha’ run away from your fellow-creaturs and been so lone.”
"Well, Master Marner, here’s what I’m thinking: I can’t make sense of the lot drawing and the answer being wrong; it would probably take the parson to explain that, and he’d just use big words. But what became clear to me, especially when I was worrying about poor Bessy Fawkes, is that I often think about these things when I feel bad for people and think I can’t do much to help them, even if I got up in the middle of the night. It comes to me that Those up above have much kinder hearts than I do—because I can't be any better than Those who created me; and if something seems hard to me, it’s because there are things I don’t understand; and honestly, there could be plenty of things I don’t know, since I know very little. So, while I was mulling that over, you popped into my mind, Master Marner, and it all came pouring in: if I felt deep down what the right and just thing was for you, and those who prayed and drew the lots—all except for that wicked one—wouldn’t they have done the right thing by you if they could? Isn’t there Someone who made us, who knows better and has a better will? That’s all I can be sure of, and everything else feels like a big puzzle when I think about it. There was a fever that took the grown-ups and left the helpless children; and there’s broken limbs; and those who try to do right and stay sober have to suffer because of those who go against it—oh, there’s trouble in this world, and some things we can never figure out. All we can do is trust, Master Marner—to do the right thing as best as we know, and to trust. Because if we, who know so little, can see a bit of good and what’s right, we can be sure that there’s a bigger good and right than we can ever understand—I feel it deep inside me that it must be that way. And if you could just keep trusting, Master Marner, you wouldn’t have felt the need to run away from your fellow creatures and felt so alone."
“Ah, but that ’ud ha’ been hard,” said Silas, in an under-tone; “it ’ud ha’ been hard to trusten then.”
“Ah, but that would have been tough,” said Silas, in a low voice; “it would have been hard to trust then.”
“And so it would,” said Dolly, almost with compunction; “them things are easier said nor done; and I’m partly ashamed o’ talking.”
“And so it would,” said Dolly, almost regretfully; “those things are easier said than done; and I’m a bit embarrassed to be talking.”
“Nay, nay,” said Silas, “you’re i’ the right, Mrs. Winthrop—you’re i’ the right. There’s good i’ this world—I’ve a feeling o’ that now; and it makes a man feel as there’s a good more nor he can see, i’ spite o’ the trouble and the wickedness. That drawing o’ the lots is dark; but the child was sent to me: there’s dealings with us—there’s dealings.”
“No, no,” said Silas, “you’re right, Mrs. Winthrop—you’re right. There’s good in this world—I can feel that now; and it makes a man sense that there’s more good than he can see, despite the trouble and the wickedness. That drawing of the lots is mysterious; but the child was sent to me: there’s something at work here—there’s something at work.”
This dialogue took place in Eppie’s earlier years, when Silas had to part with her for two hours every day, that she might learn to read at the dame school, after he had vainly tried himself to guide her in that first step to learning. Now that she was grown up, Silas had often been led, in those moments of quiet outpouring which come to people who live together in perfect love, to talk with her too of the past, and how and why he had lived a lonely man until she had been sent to him. For it would have been impossible for him to hide from Eppie that she was not his own child: even if the most delicate reticence on the point could have been expected from Raveloe gossips in her presence, her own questions about her mother could not have been parried, as she grew up, without that complete shrouding of the past which would have made a painful barrier between their minds. So Eppie had long known how her mother had died on the snowy ground, and how she herself had been found on the hearth by father Silas, who had taken her golden curls for his lost guineas brought back to him. The tender and peculiar love with which Silas had reared her in almost inseparable companionship with himself, aided by the seclusion of their dwelling, had preserved her from the lowering influences of the village talk and habits, and had kept her mind in that freshness which is sometimes falsely supposed to be an invariable attribute of rusticity. Perfect love has a breath of poetry which can exalt the relations of the least-instructed human beings; and this breath of poetry had surrounded Eppie from the time when she had followed the bright gleam that beckoned her to Silas’s hearth; so that it is not surprising if, in other things besides her delicate prettiness, she was not quite a common village maiden, but had a touch of refinement and fervour which came from no other teaching than that of tenderly-nurtured unvitiated feeling. She was too childish and simple for her imagination to rove into questions about her unknown father; for a long while it did not even occur to her that she must have had a father; and the first time that the idea of her mother having had a husband presented itself to her, was when Silas showed her the wedding-ring which had been taken from the wasted finger, and had been carefully preserved by him in a little lackered box shaped like a shoe. He delivered this box into Eppie’s charge when she had grown up, and she often opened it to look at the ring: but still she thought hardly at all about the father of whom it was the symbol. Had she not a father very close to her, who loved her better than any real fathers in the village seemed to love their daughters? On the contrary, who her mother was, and how she came to die in that forlornness, were questions that often pressed on Eppie’s mind. Her knowledge of Mrs. Winthrop, who was her nearest friend next to Silas, made her feel that a mother must be very precious; and she had again and again asked Silas to tell her how her mother looked, whom she was like, and how he had found her against the furze bush, led towards it by the little footsteps and the outstretched arms. The furze bush was there still; and this afternoon, when Eppie came out with Silas into the sunshine, it was the first object that arrested her eyes and thoughts.
This conversation happened during Eppie’s early years when Silas had to let her go for two hours each day so she could learn to read at the dame school, after he unsuccessfully tried to teach her that first step toward learning himself. Now that she was older, Silas often found himself in those quiet moments of sharing that happen between people who live together in perfect love, talking with her about the past and why he had lived as a lonely man until she came into his life. It would have been impossible for him to hide from Eppie that she wasn’t his own child; even if the local gossip in Raveloe had politely avoided the topic in her presence, her own questions about her mother would have been impossible to dodge as she grew up, without creating a painful barrier between their minds. So, Eppie had known for a long time how her mother had died on the snowy ground and how Silas had found her on the hearth, mistaking her golden curls for the lost guineas he had longed to find again. The unique and tender love with which Silas raised her, in almost constant companionship with himself, along with the isolation of their home, protected her from the negative influences of village gossip and habits, preserving her mind in a freshness that is often mistakenly thought to be a natural trait of country living. Perfect love has a poetic quality that can elevate the relationships of the least-educated people; this quality of poetry had surrounded Eppie from the moment she followed the bright light that led her to Silas’s hearth, making it no surprise that, beyond her delicate beauty, she was not just an ordinary village girl but possessed a touch of refinement and passion that came from nothing but a nurturing environment filled with pure feelings. She was too naive and innocent for her imagination to wander into thoughts about her unknown father; for a long time, she didn’t even think that she must have had one. The first time it occurred to her that her mother had had a husband was when Silas showed her the wedding ring taken from her mother’s lifeless finger, which he had carefully kept in a little lacquered box shaped like a shoe. He gave this box to Eppie when she had grown up, and she often opened it to look at the ring, but still thought little about the father it represented. Did she not have a father very close by, who loved her more than any of the real fathers in the village seemed to love their daughters? On the other hand, who her mother was and how she came to die in such loneliness were questions that often occupied Eppie’s mind. Knowing Mrs. Winthrop, who was her closest friend after Silas, made her feel that a mother must be very special, and she had repeatedly asked Silas to describe her mother’s appearance, whom she resembled, and how he had found her near the furze bush, guided by the tiny footsteps and the outstretched arms. The furze bush was still there, and this afternoon, as Eppie stepped into the sunshine with Silas, it was the first thing that caught her eyes and thoughts.
“Father,” she said, in a tone of gentle gravity, which sometimes came like a sadder, slower cadence across her playfulness, “we shall take the furze bush into the garden; it’ll come into the corner, and just against it I’ll put snowdrops and crocuses, ’cause Aaron says they won’t die out, but’ll always get more and more.”
“Dad,” she said, in a serious yet gentle tone that sometimes slipped into a sadder, slower rhythm beneath her playful demeanor, “we should put the furze bush in the garden; it’ll fit perfectly in the corner, and right next to it, I’ll plant snowdrops and crocuses because Aaron says they won’t die off, but will keep multiplying.”
“Ah, child,” said Silas, always ready to talk when he had his pipe in his hand, apparently enjoying the pauses more than the puffs, “it wouldn’t do to leave out the furze bush; and there’s nothing prettier, to my thinking, when it’s yallow with flowers. But it’s just come into my head what we’re to do for a fence—mayhap Aaron can help us to a thought; but a fence we must have, else the donkeys and things ’ull come and trample everything down. And fencing’s hard to be got at, by what I can make out.”
“Ah, kid,” said Silas, always eager to chat when he had his pipe in hand, seeming to enjoy the pauses more than the puffs, “we can’t leave out the furze bush; and there’s nothing prettier, in my opinion, when it’s yellow with flowers. But it just popped into my head what we need for a fence—maybe Aaron can help us come up with an idea; but we definitely need a fence, or the donkeys and other animals will come and trample everything down. And getting a fence set up isn't easy, from what I can tell.”
“Oh, I’ll tell you, daddy,” said Eppie, clasping her hands suddenly, after a minute’s thought. “There’s lots o’ loose stones about, some of ’em not big, and we might lay ’em atop of one another, and make a wall. You and me could carry the smallest, and Aaron ’ud carry the rest—I know he would.”
“Oh, I’ll tell you, Dad,” said Eppie, suddenly clasping her hands after thinking for a moment. “There are a lot of loose stones around, some of them not big, and we could stack them on top of each other to make a wall. You and I could carry the smallest ones, and Aaron would carry the rest—I know he would.”
“Eh, my precious un,” said Silas, “there isn’t enough stones to go all round; and as for you carrying, why, wi’ your little arms you couldn’t carry a stone no bigger than a turnip. You’re dillicate made, my dear,” he added, with a tender intonation—“that’s what Mrs. Winthrop says.”
“Eh, my precious one,” said Silas, “there aren’t enough stones to go around; and as for you carrying anything, well, with your little arms you couldn’t lift a stone bigger than a turnip. You’re delicate, my dear,” he added, with a gentle tone—“that’s what Mrs. Winthrop says.”
“Oh, I’m stronger than you think, daddy,” said Eppie; “and if there wasn’t stones enough to go all round, why they’ll go part o’ the way, and then it’ll be easier to get sticks and things for the rest. See here, round the big pit, what a many stones!”
“Oh, I’m stronger than you think, Dad,” said Eppie; “and if there aren’t enough stones to go all the way around, well, they’ll go part of the way, and then it’ll be easier to find sticks and stuff for the rest. Look at all these stones around the big pit!”
She skipped forward to the pit, meaning to lift one of the stones and exhibit her strength, but she started back in surprise.
She skipped over to the pit, planning to lift one of the stones and show off her strength, but she jumped back in surprise.
“Oh, father, just come and look here,” she exclaimed—“come and see how the water’s gone down since yesterday. Why, yesterday the pit was ever so full!”
“Oh, Dad, come and look at this,” she said—“come and see how much the water has gone down since yesterday. Yesterday, the pit was so full!”
“Well, to be sure,” said Silas, coming to her side. “Why, that’s the draining they’ve begun on, since harvest, i’ Mr. Osgood’s fields, I reckon. The foreman said to me the other day, when I passed by ’em, ‘Master Marner,’ he said, ‘I shouldn’t wonder if we lay your bit o’ waste as dry as a bone.’ It was Mr. Godfrey Cass, he said, had gone into the draining: he’d been taking these fields o’ Mr. Osgood.”
“Well, for sure,” said Silas, joining her. “That’s the drainage they started on after the harvest in Mr. Osgood’s fields, I guess. The foreman told me the other day when I walked by, ‘Master Marner,’ he said, ‘I wouldn’t be surprised if we make your little plot as dry as a bone.’ He mentioned that it was Mr. Godfrey Cass who got into the drainage; he’d taken over these fields from Mr. Osgood.”
“How odd it’ll seem to have the old pit dried up!” said Eppie, turning away, and stooping to lift rather a large stone. “See, daddy, I can carry this quite well,” she said, going along with much energy for a few steps, but presently letting it fall.
“How strange it will be to see the old pit all dried up!” Eppie said as she turned away and bent down to pick up a pretty big rock. “Look, Daddy, I can carry this just fine,” she added, moving along with a lot of enthusiasm for a few steps before dropping it.
“Ah, you’re fine and strong, aren’t you?” said Silas, while Eppie shook her aching arms and laughed. “Come, come, let us go and sit down on the bank against the stile there, and have no more lifting. You might hurt yourself, child. You’d need have somebody to work for you—and my arm isn’t over strong.”
“Ah, you’re fine and strong, aren’t you?” said Silas, while Eppie shook her sore arms and laughed. “Come on, let’s go sit on the bank by the stile over there and stop lifting. You might hurt yourself, kid. You’d need someone to do the heavy work for you—and my arm isn't that strong.”
Silas uttered the last sentence slowly, as if it implied more than met the ear; and Eppie, when they sat down on the bank, nestled close to his side, and, taking hold caressingly of the arm that was not over strong, held it on her lap, while Silas puffed again dutifully at the pipe, which occupied his other arm. An ash in the hedgerow behind made a fretted screen from the sun, and threw happy playful shadows all about them.
Silas spoke the last sentence slowly, as if it meant more than it seemed; and Eppie, when they sat down on the bank, nestled close to him, and gently took the weaker arm and rested it on her lap, while Silas dutifully puffed on the pipe he held in his other arm. An ash tree in the hedgerow behind them created a dappled screen from the sun, casting cheerful, playful shadows all around them.
“Father,” said Eppie, very gently, after they had been sitting in silence a little while, “if I was to be married, ought I to be married with my mother’s ring?”
“Dad,” Eppie said softly after they had been sitting in silence for a while, “if I were to get married, should I use my mom’s ring?”
Silas gave an almost imperceptible start, though the question fell in with the under-current of thought in his own mind, and then said, in a subdued tone, “Why, Eppie, have you been a-thinking on it?”
Silas gave a barely noticeable jump, even though the question matched the thoughts swirling in his own mind, and then said quietly, “Why, Eppie, have you been thinking about it?”
“Only this last week, father,” said Eppie, ingenuously, “since Aaron talked to me about it.”
“Just this past week, Dad,” said Eppie, honestly, “since Aaron brought it up with me.”
“And what did he say?” said Silas, still in the same subdued way, as if he were anxious lest he should fall into the slightest tone that was not for Eppie’s good.
“And what did he say?” Silas asked, still speaking softly, as if he were worried about even slightly saying anything that wasn’t for Eppie’s benefit.
“He said he should like to be married, because he was a-going in four-and-twenty, and had got a deal of gardening work, now Mr. Mott’s given up; and he goes twice a-week regular to Mr. Cass’s, and once to Mr. Osgood’s, and they’re going to take him on at the Rectory.”
“He said he would like to get married because he’s turning twenty-four soon and has a lot of gardening work now that Mr. Mott has quit. He goes to Mr. Cass’s twice a week and once to Mr. Osgood’s, and they’re going to hire him at the Rectory.”
“And who is it as he’s wanting to marry?” said Silas, with rather a sad smile.
“And who does he want to marry?” said Silas, with a somewhat sad smile.
“Why, me, to be sure, daddy,” said Eppie, with dimpling laughter, kissing her father’s cheek; “as if he’d want to marry anybody else!”
“Of course, daddy,” Eppie said with a playful laugh, kissing her father’s cheek. “Like he’d want to marry anyone else!”
“And you mean to have him, do you?” said Silas.
“And you really want him, don’t you?” said Silas.
“Yes, some time,” said Eppie, “I don’t know when. Everybody’s married some time, Aaron says. But I told him that wasn’t true: for, I said, look at father—he’s never been married.”
“Yes, some time,” Eppie said, “I don’t know when. Everyone gets married eventually, Aaron says. But I told him that wasn’t true: I said, look at Dad—he’s never been married.”
“No, child,” said Silas, “your father was a lone man till you was sent to him.”
“No, kid,” said Silas, “your dad was a solitary man until you were sent to him.”
“But you’ll never be lone again, father,” said Eppie, tenderly. “That was what Aaron said—‘I could never think o’ taking you away from Master Marner, Eppie.’ And I said, ‘It ’ud be no use if you did, Aaron.’ And he wants us all to live together, so as you needn’t work a bit, father, only what’s for your own pleasure; and he’d be as good as a son to you—that was what he said.”
“But you’ll never be alone again, Dad,” Eppie said gently. “That’s what Aaron said—‘I could never think of taking you away from Master Marner, Eppie.’ And I told him, ‘It wouldn’t matter if you did, Aaron.’ He wants us all to live together, so you won’t have to work at all, Dad, just whatever you enjoy; and he’d be like a son to you—that’s what he said.”
“And should you like that, Eppie?” said Silas, looking at her.
“And would you like that, Eppie?” Silas asked, looking at her.
“I shouldn’t mind it, father,” said Eppie, quite simply. “And I should like things to be so as you needn’t work much. But if it wasn’t for that, I’d sooner things didn’t change. I’m very happy: I like Aaron to be fond of me, and come and see us often, and behave pretty to you—he always does behave pretty to you, doesn’t he, father?”
“I don’t mind it, Dad," Eppie said honestly. "And I want things to be easy for you so you don’t have to work too hard. But if it weren’t for that, I’d prefer that nothing changed. I’m really happy: I like that Aaron cares about me, comes to see us often, and treats you nicely—he always does treat you nicely, doesn’t he, Dad?”
“Yes, child, nobody could behave better,” said Silas, emphatically. “He’s his mother’s lad.”
“Yes, kid, no one could act better,” said Silas, firmly. “He’s his mom’s boy.”
“But I don’t want any change,” said Eppie. “I should like to go on a long, long while, just as we are. Only Aaron does want a change; and he made me cry a bit—only a bit—because he said I didn’t care for him, for if I cared for him I should want us to be married, as he did.”
“But I don’t want any change,” Eppie said. “I just want to keep things the way they are for a long time. But Aaron does want a change, and he made me cry a little—just a little—because he said I didn’t care about him. He thinks that if I really cared, I would want us to get married, like he does.”
“Eh, my blessed child,” said Silas, laying down his pipe as if it were useless to pretend to smoke any longer, “you’re o’er young to be married. We’ll ask Mrs. Winthrop—we’ll ask Aaron’s mother what she thinks: if there’s a right thing to do, she’ll come at it. But there’s this to be thought on, Eppie: things will change, whether we like it or no; things won’t go on for a long while just as they are and no difference. I shall get older and helplesser, and be a burden on you, belike, if I don’t go away from you altogether. Not as I mean you’d think me a burden—I know you wouldn’t—but it ’ud be hard upon you; and when I look for’ard to that, I like to think as you’d have somebody else besides me—somebody young and strong, as’ll outlast your own life, and take care on you to the end.” Silas paused, and, resting his wrists on his knees, lifted his hands up and down meditatively as he looked on the ground.
“Eh, my dear child,” said Silas, putting down his pipe as if it were pointless to pretend to smoke any longer, “you’re too young to get married. Let’s ask Mrs. Winthrop—we’ll ask Aaron’s mother what she thinks: if there’s a right thing to do, she’ll know it. But we need to consider this, Eppie: things will change, whether we want them to or not; things can’t stay the same for much longer. I’ll get older and less capable, and I might become a burden to you, especially if I don’t step back completely. Not that you’d think of me as a burden—I know you wouldn’t—but it would be difficult for you; and when I think about that, I like to imagine that you’d have someone else besides me—someone young and strong, who will outlive you, and take care of you until the end.” Silas paused, resting his wrists on his knees, lifting his hands up and down thoughtfully as he looked at the ground.
“Then, would you like me to be married, father?” said Eppie, with a little trembling in her voice.
“Then, do you want me to get married, Dad?” Eppie asked, her voice slightly trembling.
“I’ll not be the man to say no, Eppie,” said Silas, emphatically; “but we’ll ask your godmother. She’ll wish the right thing by you and her son too.”
“I won’t be the one to say no, Eppie,” said Silas strongly; “but we’ll ask your godmother. She’ll want what’s best for you and her son too.”
“There they come, then,” said Eppie. “Let us go and meet ’em. Oh, the pipe! won’t you have it lit again, father?” said Eppie, lifting that medicinal appliance from the ground.
“There they come, then,” said Eppie. “Let’s go meet them. Oh, the pipe! Can’t you light it again, Dad?” said Eppie, picking up that medicinal device from the ground.
“Nay, child,” said Silas, “I’ve done enough for to-day. I think, mayhap, a little of it does me more good than so much at once.”
“Nah, kid,” said Silas, “I’ve done enough for today. I think maybe a little of it helps me more than doing too much all at once.”
CHAPTER XVII.
While Silas and Eppie were seated on the bank discoursing in the fleckered shade of the ash tree, Miss Priscilla Lammeter was resisting her sister’s arguments, that it would be better to take tea at the Red House, and let her father have a long nap, than drive home to the Warrens so soon after dinner. The family party (of four only) were seated round the table in the dark wainscoted parlour, with the Sunday dessert before them, of fresh filberts, apples, and pears, duly ornamented with leaves by Nancy’s own hand before the bells had rung for church.
While Silas and Eppie sat on the riverbank talking in the dappled shade of the ash tree, Miss Priscilla Lammeter was pushing back against her sister's arguments that it would be better to have tea at the Red House and let their father take a long nap, instead of driving home to the Warrens so soon after dinner. The family party, just four of them, was gathered around the table in the dimly lit parlour with the Sunday dessert in front of them, consisting of fresh hazelnuts, apples, and pears, carefully arranged with leaves by Nancy’s own hand before the church bells had rung.
A great change has come over the dark wainscoted parlour since we saw it in Godfrey’s bachelor days, and under the wifeless reign of the old Squire. Now all is polish, on which no yesterday’s dust is ever allowed to rest, from the yard’s width of oaken boards round the carpet, to the old Squire’s gun and whips and walking-sticks, ranged on the stag’s antlers above the mantelpiece. All other signs of sporting and outdoor occupation Nancy has removed to another room; but she has brought into the Red House the habit of filial reverence, and preserves sacredly in a place of honour these relics of her husband’s departed father. The tankards are on the side-table still, but the bossed silver is undimmed by handling, and there are no dregs to send forth unpleasant suggestions: the only prevailing scent is of the lavender and rose-leaves that fill the vases of Derbyshire spar. All is purity and order in this once dreary room, for, fifteen years ago, it was entered by a new presiding spirit.
A big change has taken place in the dark-paneled living room since we last saw it during Godfrey's single days, under the rule of the old Squire who is now without a wife. Now everything is polished, and no dust from yesterday is allowed to settle, from the wide oak floorboards around the carpet to the old Squire's gun, whips, and walking sticks, displayed on the stag's antlers above the mantelpiece. Nancy has moved all other signs of sports and outdoor activities to another room, but she has brought into the Red House a sense of respect for her in-laws and carefully keeps these relics of her husband's late father in a place of honor. The tankards are still on the side table, but the embossed silver is untouched and shines without any signs of wear, and there are no dregs to suggest anything unpleasant: the only scent that fills the air is of the lavender and rose leaves in the Derbyshire spar vases. Everything is clean and organized in this once dreary room, as a new guiding spirit entered it fifteen years ago.
“Now, father,” said Nancy, “is there any call for you to go home to tea? Mayn’t you just as well stay with us?—such a beautiful evening as it’s likely to be.”
“Now, Dad,” said Nancy, “is there any reason for you to go home for tea? Can’t you just stay with us? It’s such a beautiful evening!”
The old gentleman had been talking with Godfrey about the increasing poor-rate and the ruinous times, and had not heard the dialogue between his daughters.
The old man had been discussing the rising poor rates and tough times with Godfrey, and hadn’t noticed the conversation between his daughters.
“My dear, you must ask Priscilla,” he said, in the once firm voice, now become rather broken. “She manages me and the farm too.”
“My dear, you should ask Priscilla,” he said, in the once strong voice, now somewhat shaky. “She takes care of me and the farm too.”
“And reason good as I should manage you, father,” said Priscilla, “else you’d be giving yourself your death with rheumatism. And as for the farm, if anything turns out wrong, as it can’t but do in these times, there’s nothing kills a man so soon as having nobody to find fault with but himself. It’s a deal the best way o’ being master, to let somebody else do the ordering, and keep the blaming in your own hands. It ’ud save many a man a stroke, I believe.”
“And I have good reason to manage things for you, Dad,” said Priscilla, “or else you’ll just end up making yourself sick with arthritis. And about the farm, if anything goes wrong—which it likely will these days—nothing wears a person down faster than having no one to blame but themselves. It’s a much better way to be in charge if you let someone else do the managing and keep the blame for yourself. I believe it would save a lot of people a lot of stress.”
“Well, well, my dear,” said her father, with a quiet laugh, “I didn’t say you don’t manage for everybody’s good.”
“Well, well, my dear,” her father said with a soft laugh, “I didn’t say you don’t take care of everyone’s interests.”
“Then manage so as you may stay tea, Priscilla,” said Nancy, putting her hand on her sister’s arm affectionately. “Come now; and we’ll go round the garden while father has his nap.”
“Then make sure you stay for tea, Priscilla,” said Nancy, putting her hand affectionately on her sister’s arm. “Come on; let’s walk around the garden while Dad takes his nap.”
“My dear child, he’ll have a beautiful nap in the gig, for I shall drive. And as for staying tea, I can’t hear of it; for there’s this dairymaid, now she knows she’s to be married, turned Michaelmas, she’d as lief pour the new milk into the pig-trough as into the pans. That’s the way with ’em all: it’s as if they thought the world ’ud be new-made because they’re to be married. So come and let me put my bonnet on, and there’ll be time for us to walk round the garden while the horse is being put in.”
“My dear child, he’ll have a great nap in the carriage, because I’ll be driving. And as for tea, I can’t even consider it; there’s this dairymaid, now that she knows she’s getting married around Michaelmas, she’d rather pour the new milk into the pig trough than into the pans. That’s how they all are: it’s like they think the world will change just because they’re getting married. So come on and let me put on my hat, and we’ll have time to walk around the garden while the horse is being harnessed.”
When the sisters were treading the neatly-swept garden-walks, between the bright turf that contrasted pleasantly with the dark cones and arches and wall-like hedges of yew, Priscilla said—
When the sisters were walking along the tidy garden paths, with the bright grass contrasting nicely with the dark shapes of the yew trees and the tall hedges, Priscilla said—
“I’m as glad as anything at your husband’s making that exchange o’ land with cousin Osgood, and beginning the dairying. It’s a thousand pities you didn’t do it before; for it’ll give you something to fill your mind. There’s nothing like a dairy if folks want a bit o’ worrit to make the days pass. For as for rubbing furniture, when you can once see your face in a table there’s nothing else to look for; but there’s always something fresh with the dairy; for even in the depths o’ winter there’s some pleasure in conquering the butter, and making it come whether or no. My dear,” added Priscilla, pressing her sister’s hand affectionately as they walked side by side, “you’ll never be low when you’ve got a dairy.”
“I’m really happy about your husband exchanging that piece of land with cousin Osgood and starting the dairy. It’s such a shame you didn’t do it sooner because it’ll give you something to focus on. Nothing beats having a dairy if you want a little distraction to help the days go by. As for dusting furniture, once you can see your reflection in a table, there’s nothing more to do; but there’s always something new with the dairy. Even in the middle of winter, there’s some joy in churning the butter and making it happen, no matter what. My dear,” Priscilla added, squeezing her sister’s hand affectionately as they walked side by side, “you’ll never feel down when you have a dairy.”
“Ah, Priscilla,” said Nancy, returning the pressure with a grateful glance of her clear eyes, “but it won’t make up to Godfrey: a dairy’s not so much to a man. And it’s only what he cares for that ever makes me low. I’m contented with the blessings we have, if he could be contented.”
“Ah, Priscilla,” said Nancy, returning the pressure with a thankful glance from her clear eyes, “but it won’t make up for Godfrey: a dairy isn’t that important to a man. And it’s only what he truly values that ever brings me down. I’m happy with the blessings we have, if only he could be happy too.”
“It drives me past patience,” said Priscilla, impetuously, “that way o’ the men—always wanting and wanting, and never easy with what they’ve got: they can’t sit comfortable in their chairs when they’ve neither ache nor pain, but either they must stick a pipe in their mouths, to make ’em better than well, or else they must be swallowing something strong, though they’re forced to make haste before the next meal comes in. But joyful be it spoken, our father was never that sort o’ man. And if it had pleased God to make you ugly, like me, so as the men wouldn’t ha’ run after you, we might have kept to our own family, and had nothing to do with folks as have got uneasy blood in their veins.”
“It drives me crazy,” said Priscilla, impulsively, “the way men are—always wanting more and never satisfied with what they have. They can’t sit comfortably in their chairs when they’re not in pain; they either have to light up a pipe to feel better than fine or down something strong, even though they rush to do it before the next meal comes. But thankfully, our father was never that kind of man. And if God had decided to make you ugly, like me, so the men wouldn’t chase after you, we could have stayed within our own family and avoided people with restless blood in their veins.”
“Oh, don’t say so, Priscilla,” said Nancy, repenting that she had called forth this outburst; “nobody has any occasion to find fault with Godfrey. It’s natural he should be disappointed at not having any children: every man likes to have somebody to work for and lay by for, and he always counted so on making a fuss with ’em when they were little. There’s many another man ’ud hanker more than he does. He’s the best of husbands.”
“Oh, don’t say that, Priscilla,” Nancy replied, regretting that she had prompted this outburst. “No one has any reason to criticize Godfrey. It’s only natural for him to feel upset about not having children; every man wants someone to support and save for, and he always imagined having fun with them when they were little. There are plenty of other men who would yearn for it more than he does. He’s a great husband.”
“Oh, I know,” said Priscilla, smiling sarcastically, “I know the way o’ wives; they set one on to abuse their husbands, and then they turn round on one and praise ’em as if they wanted to sell ’em. But father’ll be waiting for me; we must turn now.”
“Oh, I know,” Priscilla said with a sarcastic smile, “I know how wives work; they encourage you to criticize your husbands, and then they flip the script and praise them like they’re trying to sell them. But my father will be waiting for me; we need to head back now.”
The large gig with the steady old grey was at the front door, and Mr. Lammeter was already on the stone steps, passing the time in recalling to Godfrey what very fine points Speckle had when his master used to ride him.
The big carriage with the reliable old gray horse was at the front door, and Mr. Lammeter was already on the stone steps, reminiscing with Godfrey about the impressive features Speckle had when his owner used to ride him.
“I always would have a good horse, you know,” said the old gentleman, not liking that spirited time to be quite effaced from the memory of his juniors.
“I always would have a good horse, you know,” said the old gentleman, not wanting that lively time to be entirely forgotten by the younger generation.
“Mind you bring Nancy to the Warrens before the week’s out, Mr. Cass,” was Priscilla’s parting injunction, as she took the reins, and shook them gently, by way of friendly incitement to Speckle.
“Make sure you bring Nancy to the Warrens before the week is over, Mr. Cass,” was Priscilla’s final reminder, as she took the reins and shook them gently, encouraging Speckle.
“I shall just take a turn to the fields against the Stone-pits, Nancy, and look at the draining,” said Godfrey.
“I’m just going to take a walk to the fields by the Stone-pits, Nancy, and check on the draining,” said Godfrey.
“You’ll be in again by tea-time, dear?”
“You’ll be back by tea-time, right?”
“Oh, yes, I shall be back in an hour.”
“Oh, yes, I'll be back in an hour.”
It was Godfrey’s custom on a Sunday afternoon to do a little contemplative farming in a leisurely walk. Nancy seldom accompanied him; for the women of her generation—unless, like Priscilla, they took to outdoor management—were not given to much walking beyond their own house and garden, finding sufficient exercise in domestic duties. So, when Priscilla was not with her, she usually sat with Mant’s Bible before her, and after following the text with her eyes for a little while, she would gradually permit them to wander as her thoughts had already insisted on wandering.
It was Godfrey’s habit on a Sunday afternoon to take a leisurely walk while doing a bit of contemplative farming. Nancy rarely joined him because the women of her generation—unless they took on outdoor management like Priscilla—didn't walk much beyond their own homes and gardens, finding enough exercise in household chores. So, when Priscilla wasn't with her, she would typically sit with Mant's Bible in front of her, and after following the text with her eyes for a little while, she would eventually let her gaze drift as her thoughts had already started to wander.
But Nancy’s Sunday thoughts were rarely quite out of keeping with the devout and reverential intention implied by the book spread open before her. She was not theologically instructed enough to discern very clearly the relation between the sacred documents of the past which she opened without method, and her own obscure, simple life; but the spirit of rectitude, and the sense of responsibility for the effect of her conduct on others, which were strong elements in Nancy’s character, had made it a habit with her to scrutinize her past feelings and actions with self-questioning solicitude. Her mind not being courted by a great variety of subjects, she filled the vacant moments by living inwardly, again and again, through all her remembered experience, especially through the fifteen years of her married time, in which her life and its significance had been doubled. She recalled the small details, the words, tones, and looks, in the critical scenes which had opened a new epoch for her by giving her a deeper insight into the relations and trials of life, or which had called on her for some little effort of forbearance, or of painful adherence to an imagined or real duty—asking herself continually whether she had been in any respect blamable. This excessive rumination and self-questioning is perhaps a morbid habit inevitable to a mind of much moral sensibility when shut out from its due share of outward activity and of practical claims on its affections—inevitable to a noble-hearted, childless woman, when her lot is narrow. “I can do so little—have I done it all well?” is the perpetually recurring thought; and there are no voices calling her away from that soliloquy, no peremptory demands to divert energy from vain regret or superfluous scruple.
But Nancy's thoughts on Sunday rarely strayed far from the devout and respectful intention that the book laid open in front of her suggested. She wasn't well-versed in theology enough to clearly understand the connection between the sacred texts of the past that she opened without any particular method and her own simple, obscure life; however, the strong sense of integrity and responsibility for how her actions impacted others, which were key parts of Nancy's character, made her habitually reflect on her past feelings and actions with a questioning and caring mind. Since her thoughts weren't occupied by a wide range of subjects, she filled her free moments by revisiting her memories, especially the fifteen years of her marriage, which had significantly deepened her life and its meaning. She remembered the small details, the words, the tones, and the looks during pivotal moments that had ushered in a new phase for her, providing deeper insights into life's relationships and challenges, or that had required her to exercise patience or stick to a perceived or real duty—consistently asking herself whether she had done anything wrong. This intense reflection and self-questioning is perhaps a compulsive habit that comes naturally to a deeply sensitive mind when it's deprived of active engagement and practical emotional needs—especially for a noble-hearted, childless woman in a limited situation. “I can do so little—have I done it all well?” is the thought that keeps coming back, and there are no voices pulling her away from that inner dialogue, no urgent demands that would redirect her energy from futile regret or unnecessary worry.
There was one main thread of painful experience in Nancy’s married life, and on it hung certain deeply-felt scenes, which were the oftenest revived in retrospect. The short dialogue with Priscilla in the garden had determined the current of retrospect in that frequent direction this particular Sunday afternoon. The first wandering of her thought from the text, which she still attempted dutifully to follow with her eyes and silent lips, was into an imaginary enlargement of the defence she had set up for her husband against Priscilla’s implied blame. The vindication of the loved object is the best balm affection can find for its wounds:—“A man must have so much on his mind,” is the belief by which a wife often supports a cheerful face under rough answers and unfeeling words. And Nancy’s deepest wounds had all come from the perception that the absence of children from their hearth was dwelt on in her husband’s mind as a privation to which he could not reconcile himself.
There was one main source of pain in Nancy’s married life, and it was tied to certain deeply-felt moments that she often revisited in her thoughts. The brief conversation with Priscilla in the garden had set her memories flowing in that direction on this particular Sunday afternoon. As her mind drifted away from the text she was still trying to follow with her eyes and silent lips, she found herself imagining ways to defend her husband against Priscilla’s implied criticism. Justifying the person you love is the best remedy affection can find for its wounds: “A man must have so much on his mind,” is the belief that helps a wife maintain a cheerful demeanor despite harsh responses and insensitive words. And Nancy’s deepest hurts had all come from realizing that her husband couldn’t come to terms with the absence of children in their home, a loss that weighed heavily on his mind.
Yet sweet Nancy might have been expected to feel still more keenly the denial of a blessing to which she had looked forward with all the varied expectations and preparations, solemn and prettily trivial, which fill the mind of a loving woman when she expects to become a mother. Was there not a drawer filled with the neat work of her hands, all unworn and untouched, just as she had arranged it there fourteen years ago—just, but for one little dress, which had been made the burial-dress? But under this immediate personal trial Nancy was so firmly unmurmuring, that years ago she had suddenly renounced the habit of visiting this drawer, lest she should in this way be cherishing a longing for what was not given.
Yet sweet Nancy might have been expected to feel even more intensely the loss of a blessing she had looked forward to with all the various hopes and preparations, both serious and cute, that occupy a loving woman's mind when she expects to become a mother. Wasn't there a drawer filled with the neatly crafted items made by her hands, all unused and untouched, just as she had organized them fourteen years ago—except for one little dress, which had been made for burial? But in facing this personal trial, Nancy was so resolutely composed that years ago she had abruptly decided to stop visiting this drawer, so she wouldn’t end up nurturing a desire for what she wasn’t given.
Perhaps it was this very severity towards any indulgence of what she held to be sinful regret in herself, that made her shrink from applying her own standard to her husband. “It is very different—it is much worse for a man to be disappointed in that way: a woman can always be satisfied with devoting herself to her husband, but a man wants something that will make him look forward more—and sitting by the fire is so much duller to him than to a woman.” And always, when Nancy reached this point in her meditations—trying, with predetermined sympathy, to see everything as Godfrey saw it—there came a renewal of self-questioning. Had she done everything in her power to lighten Godfrey’s privation? Had she really been right in the resistance which had cost her so much pain six years ago, and again four years ago—the resistance to her husband’s wish that they should adopt a child? Adoption was more remote from the ideas and habits of that time than of our own; still Nancy had her opinion on it. It was as necessary to her mind to have an opinion on all topics, not exclusively masculine, that had come under her notice, as for her to have a precisely marked place for every article of her personal property: and her opinions were always principles to be unwaveringly acted on. They were firm, not because of their basis, but because she held them with a tenacity inseparable from her mental action. On all the duties and proprieties of life, from filial behaviour to the arrangements of the evening toilette, pretty Nancy Lammeter, by the time she was three-and-twenty, had her unalterable little code, and had formed every one of her habits in strict accordance with that code. She carried these decided judgments within her in the most unobtrusive way: they rooted themselves in her mind, and grew there as quietly as grass. Years ago, we know, she insisted on dressing like Priscilla, because “it was right for sisters to dress alike,” and because “she would do what was right if she wore a gown dyed with cheese-colouring”. That was a trivial but typical instance of the mode in which Nancy’s life was regulated.
Maybe it was this strictness toward any indulgence of what she considered sinful regret in herself that made her hesitate to apply her own standards to her husband. “It’s very different—it’s much worse for a man to feel disappointed like that: a woman can always find fulfillment in dedicating herself to her husband, but a man wants something that excites him more—and sitting by the fire is much duller for him than for a woman.” And always, when Nancy reached this point in her thoughts—trying, with a predetermined empathy, to see everything from Godfrey’s perspective—she found herself questioning herself again. Had she done everything possible to ease Godfrey’s struggles? Had she truly been right in resisting what had caused her so much pain six years ago, and again four years ago—the push against her husband’s desire for them to adopt a child? Adoption was more uncommon in those days than it is today; still, Nancy had her views on it. It was essential for her to have an opinion on all topics, not just those that belonged to men, that came to her attention, just as it was important for her to have a clearly defined place for all her belongings: her opinions were always principles she firmly acted upon. They were strong, not because of their foundation, but because she held them with a tenacity that was inseparable from her thinking. By the time she was twenty-three, pretty Nancy Lammeter had her unchangeable little code on all duties and etiquette in life, from how to behave as a daughter to how to arrange her evening outfit, and she had shaped all her habits in strict alignment with that code. She carried these firm beliefs within her in the most subtle way: they took root in her mind, growing quietly like grass. Years ago, she insisted on dressing like Priscilla because “it was right for sisters to dress alike,” and because “she would do what was right even if she wore a gown dyed with cheese coloring.” That was a small but typical example of how Nancy’s life was organized.
It was one of those rigid principles, and no petty egoistic feeling, which had been the ground of Nancy’s difficult resistance to her husband’s wish. To adopt a child, because children of your own had been denied you, was to try and choose your lot in spite of Providence: the adopted child, she was convinced, would never turn out well, and would be a curse to those who had wilfully and rebelliously sought what it was clear that, for some high reason, they were better without. When you saw a thing was not meant to be, said Nancy, it was a bounden duty to leave off so much as wishing for it. And so far, perhaps, the wisest of men could scarcely make more than a verbal improvement in her principle. But the conditions under which she held it apparent that a thing was not meant to be, depended on a more peculiar mode of thinking. She would have given up making a purchase at a particular place if, on three successive times, rain, or some other cause of Heaven’s sending, had formed an obstacle; and she would have anticipated a broken limb or other heavy misfortune to any one who persisted in spite of such indications.
It was one of those firm principles, and not a selfish feeling, that had caused Nancy’s tough resistance to her husband’s wish. Adopting a child, simply because having your own wasn’t possible, felt like trying to defy fate: she believed the adopted child would never turn out well and would be a burden to those who had intentionally and stubbornly pursued what it was clear, for some profound reason, they were meant to be without. When you saw that something just wasn’t meant to happen, Nancy said, it was a responsibility to stop even wishing for it. And so far, maybe even the wisest of men could only slightly improve on her principle with words. But the conditions she believed indicated something wasn't meant to be relied on a more unique way of thinking. She would have given up shopping at a particular place if, three times in a row, rain or some other act of fate had gotten in the way; and she would have expected a broken limb or some serious misfortune to anyone who kept going in spite of such signs.
“But why should you think the child would turn out ill?” said Godfrey, in his remonstrances. “She has thriven as well as child can do with the weaver; and he adopted her. There isn’t such a pretty little girl anywhere else in the parish, or one fitter for the station we could give her. Where can be the likelihood of her being a curse to anybody?”
“But why do you think the child will turn out badly?” Godfrey said, trying to reason. “She has thrived as well as any child can with the weaver, and he took her in. There isn’t a prettier little girl anywhere else in the parish, or one better suited for the life we could provide her. What’s the chance that she’ll bring trouble to anyone?”
“Yes, my dear Godfrey,” said Nancy, who was sitting with her hands tightly clasped together, and with yearning, regretful affection in her eyes. “The child may not turn out ill with the weaver. But, then, he didn’t go to seek her, as we should be doing. It will be wrong: I feel sure it will. Don’t you remember what that lady we met at the Royston Baths told us about the child her sister adopted? That was the only adopting I ever heard of: and the child was transported when it was twenty-three. Dear Godfrey, don’t ask me to do what I know is wrong: I should never be happy again. I know it’s very hard for you—it’s easier for me—but it’s the will of Providence.”
“Yes, my dear Godfrey,” said Nancy, who was sitting with her hands tightly clasped together and a look of yearning, regretful affection in her eyes. “The child might not end up badly with the weaver. But, he didn’t go looking for her, like we should be doing. It would be wrong: I’m sure of it. Don’t you remember what that woman we met at the Royston Baths told us about the child her sister adopted? That’s the only adoption I’ve ever heard of, and the child was taken away when he was twenty-three. Dear Godfrey, don’t ask me to do something I know is wrong: I would never be happy again. I know it’s really hard for you—it’s easier for me—but it’s the will of Providence.”
It might seem singular that Nancy—with her religious theory pieced together out of narrow social traditions, fragments of church doctrine imperfectly understood, and girlish reasonings on her small experience—should have arrived by herself at a way of thinking so nearly akin to that of many devout people, whose beliefs are held in the shape of a system quite remote from her knowledge—singular, if we did not know that human beliefs, like all other natural growths, elude the barriers of system.
It might seem unusual that Nancy—with her religious beliefs formed from limited social traditions, bits of church teachings she didn't fully understand, and youthful reasoning based on her limited experience—managed to develop a way of thinking that closely resembles that of many devoted individuals, whose beliefs are organized in a system far removed from her understanding. This would be surprising if we weren't aware that human beliefs, like all other natural developments, can break through the constraints of any system.
Godfrey had from the first specified Eppie, then about twelve years old, as a child suitable for them to adopt. It had never occurred to him that Silas would rather part with his life than with Eppie. Surely the weaver would wish the best to the child he had taken so much trouble with, and would be glad that such good fortune should happen to her: she would always be very grateful to him, and he would be well provided for to the end of his life—provided for as the excellent part he had done by the child deserved. Was it not an appropriate thing for people in a higher station to take a charge off the hands of a man in a lower? It seemed an eminently appropriate thing to Godfrey, for reasons that were known only to himself; and by a common fallacy, he imagined the measure would be easy because he had private motives for desiring it. This was rather a coarse mode of estimating Silas’s relation to Eppie; but we must remember that many of the impressions which Godfrey was likely to gather concerning the labouring people around him would favour the idea that deep affections can hardly go along with callous palms and scant means; and he had not had the opportunity, even if he had had the power, of entering intimately into all that was exceptional in the weaver’s experience. It was only the want of adequate knowledge that could have made it possible for Godfrey deliberately to entertain an unfeeling project: his natural kindness had outlived that blighting time of cruel wishes, and Nancy’s praise of him as a husband was not founded entirely on a wilful illusion.
Godfrey had, from the beginning, singled out Eppie, who was about twelve years old, as the child they should adopt. He never considered that Silas would rather give up his life than let Eppie go. Surely, the weaver would want the best for the child he had cared for so much and would be happy that such good fortune had come her way: she would always be grateful to him, and he would be well taken care of for the rest of his life—taken care of as he richly deserved because of the excellent actions he had shown towards the child. Wasn't it the right thing for people in a higher social position to take some responsibility off the hands of someone in a lower position? It seemed like a perfectly appropriate idea to Godfrey, for reasons known only to him; and by a common misunderstanding, he thought it would be easy because he had personal reasons for wanting it. This was a rather naive way of assessing Silas’s relationship with Eppie; but we must remember that many of the views Godfrey likely had about the working-class people around him would support the belief that deep feelings can't go hand in hand with rough hands and limited means; and he hadn’t had the chance, even if he had the ability, to fully grasp the unique aspects of the weaver’s life. It was only his lack of proper understanding that could have allowed Godfrey to even consider such an unfeeling plan: his natural kindness had survived that harsh time of cruel desires, and Nancy’s praise of him as a husband was not based entirely on a deliberate deception.
“I was right,” she said to herself, when she had recalled all their scenes of discussion—“I feel I was right to say him nay, though it hurt me more than anything; but how good Godfrey has been about it! Many men would have been very angry with me for standing out against their wishes; and they might have thrown out that they’d had ill-luck in marrying me; but Godfrey has never been the man to say me an unkind word. It’s only what he can’t hide: everything seems so blank to him, I know; and the land—what a difference it ’ud make to him, when he goes to see after things, if he’d children growing up that he was doing it all for! But I won’t murmur; and perhaps if he’d married a woman who’d have had children, she’d have vexed him in other ways.”
"I was right," she told herself, as she recalled all their discussions—"I feel I was right to say no to him, even though it hurt me more than anything; but Godfrey has been so good about it! Many men would have been really angry with me for going against their wishes; they might have said they were unlucky to marry me; but Godfrey has never been the type to say an unkind word to me. It’s just what he can't hide: everything seems so empty to him, I know; and the land—what a difference it would make for him when he goes to check on things if he had kids growing up that he was doing it all for! But I won’t complain; and maybe if he had married a woman who could have had kids, she would have frustrated him in different ways."
This possibility was Nancy’s chief comfort; and to give it greater strength, she laboured to make it impossible that any other wife should have had more perfect tenderness. She had been forced to vex him by that one denial. Godfrey was not insensible to her loving effort, and did Nancy no injustice as to the motives of her obstinacy. It was impossible to have lived with her fifteen years and not be aware that an unselfish clinging to the right, and a sincerity clear as the flower-born dew, were her main characteristics; indeed, Godfrey felt this so strongly, that his own more wavering nature, too averse to facing difficulty to be unvaryingly simple and truthful, was kept in a certain awe of this gentle wife who watched his looks with a yearning to obey them. It seemed to him impossible that he should ever confess to her the truth about Eppie: she would never recover from the repulsion the story of his earlier marriage would create, told to her now, after that long concealment. And the child, too, he thought, must become an object of repulsion: the very sight of her would be painful. The shock to Nancy’s mingled pride and ignorance of the world’s evil might even be too much for her delicate frame. Since he had married her with that secret on his heart, he must keep it there to the last. Whatever else he did, he could not make an irreparable breach between himself and this long-loved wife.
This possibility was Nancy’s main source of comfort; and to strengthen it, she worked hard to ensure that no other wife could have shown him more perfect love. She had been forced to upset him with that one denial. Godfrey recognized her loving effort and understood her reasons for being stubborn. It was impossible to have lived with her for fifteen years and not realize that her main traits were an unselfish commitment to what’s right and a sincerity as clear as morning dew; in fact, Godfrey felt this so strongly that his own more uncertain nature, which preferred to avoid difficulty rather than be consistently straightforward, felt a certain respect for this gentle wife who looked at him with a desire to please. He thought it was impossible to ever tell her the truth about Eppie: she would never recover from the disgust her story of his past marriage would create, especially after keeping it hidden for so long. He also worried that the child would become a source of repulsion: just seeing her would be painful. The shock to Nancy’s pride and her ignorance of the world’s cruelties might even be too much for her delicate health. Since he had married her while harboring that secret, he felt he had to keep it hidden until the end. No matter what, he couldn’t create an irreparable rift between himself and this long-beloved wife.
Meanwhile, why could he not make up his mind to the absence of children from a hearth brightened by such a wife? Why did his mind fly uneasily to that void, as if it were the sole reason why life was not thoroughly joyous to him? I suppose it is the way with all men and women who reach middle age without the clear perception that life never can be thoroughly joyous: under the vague dullness of the grey hours, dissatisfaction seeks a definite object, and finds it in the privation of an untried good. Dissatisfaction seated musingly on a childless hearth, thinks with envy of the father whose return is greeted by young voices—seated at the meal where the little heads rise one above another like nursery plants, it sees a black care hovering behind every one of them, and thinks the impulses by which men abandon freedom, and seek for ties, are surely nothing but a brief madness. In Godfrey’s case there were further reasons why his thoughts should be continually solicited by this one point in his lot: his conscience, never thoroughly easy about Eppie, now gave his childless home the aspect of a retribution; and as the time passed on, under Nancy’s refusal to adopt her, any retrieval of his error became more and more difficult.
Meanwhile, why couldn't he decide how he felt about the lack of children in a home illuminated by such a wife? Why did his thoughts unnervingly drift towards that emptiness, as if it were the only reason his life wasn’t completely joyful? I guess it’s common for men and women who reach middle age without realizing that life can never truly be fully joyful: amidst the vague dullness of the gray hours, dissatisfaction looks for something specific to blame and finds it in the absence of something not yet experienced. Dissatisfaction, sitting pensively on a childless hearth, envies the father whose return is celebrated by young voices—at the dinner table where little heads pop up like nursery plants, it sees a dark worry lurking behind each one of them, and believes that the drives that lead men to give up freedom and seek connections are merely a momentary insanity. In Godfrey's case, there were even more reasons for his thoughts to constantly focus on this particular aspect of his life: his conscience, never completely at ease about Eppie, now made his childless home seem like a punishment; and as time went on, with Nancy’s refusal to adopt her, any chance of correcting his mistake became increasingly difficult.
On this Sunday afternoon it was already four years since there had been any allusion to the subject between them, and Nancy supposed that it was for ever buried.
On this Sunday afternoon, it had already been four years since they last mentioned the subject, and Nancy thought it was buried for good.
“I wonder if he’ll mind it less or more as he gets older,” she thought; “I’m afraid more. Aged people feel the miss of children: what would father do without Priscilla? And if I die, Godfrey will be very lonely—not holding together with his brothers much. But I won’t be over-anxious, and trying to make things out beforehand: I must do my best for the present.”
“I wonder if he’ll mind it less or more as he gets older,” she thought; “I’m afraid more. Older people really notice the absence of children: what would Dad do without Priscilla? And if I die, Godfrey will be very lonely—not really connecting with his brothers much. But I won’t worry too much or try to figure everything out ahead of time: I just have to do my best for now.”
With that last thought Nancy roused herself from her reverie, and turned her eyes again towards the forsaken page. It had been forsaken longer than she imagined, for she was presently surprised by the appearance of the servant with the tea-things. It was, in fact, a little before the usual time for tea; but Jane had her reasons.
With that last thought, Nancy shook herself out of her daydream and looked back at the neglected page. It had been neglected longer than she realized, as she was soon surprised by the arrival of the servant with the tea set. It was actually a bit earlier than usual for tea, but Jane had her reasons.
“Is your master come into the yard, Jane?”
"Has your boss come into the yard, Jane?"
“No ’m, he isn’t,” said Jane, with a slight emphasis, of which, however, her mistress took no notice.
“Not at all, he isn’t,” said Jane, with a slight emphasis, which her mistress, however, didn’t notice.
“I don’t know whether you’ve seen ’em, ’m,” continued Jane, after a pause, “but there’s folks making haste all one way, afore the front window. I doubt something’s happened. There’s niver a man to be seen i’ the yard, else I’d send and see. I’ve been up into the top attic, but there’s no seeing anything for trees. I hope nobody’s hurt, that’s all.”
“I don’t know if you’ve seen them,” Jane continued after a pause, “but there are people rushing in one direction in front of the window. I think something’s happened. There isn’t a man to be seen in the yard, or I’d send someone to check. I’ve been up to the top attic, but I can’t see anything because of the trees. I just hope nobody’s hurt, that’s all.”
“Oh, no, I daresay there’s nothing much the matter,” said Nancy. “It’s perhaps Mr. Snell’s bull got out again, as he did before.”
“Oh, no, I really don’t think there’s anything wrong,” said Nancy. “It’s probably just that Mr. Snell’s bull got loose again, like last time.”
“I wish he mayn’t gore anybody then, that’s all,” said Jane, not altogether despising a hypothesis which covered a few imaginary calamities.
"I hope he doesn't hurt anyone then, that's all," said Jane, not entirely dismissing a theory that included a few made-up disasters.
“That girl is always terrifying me,” thought Nancy; “I wish Godfrey would come in.”
"That girl is always freaking me out," thought Nancy; "I wish Godfrey would come in."
She went to the front window and looked as far as she could see along the road, with an uneasiness which she felt to be childish, for there were now no such signs of excitement as Jane had spoken of, and Godfrey would not be likely to return by the village road, but by the fields. She continued to stand, however, looking at the placid churchyard with the long shadows of the gravestones across the bright green hillocks, and at the glowing autumn colours of the Rectory trees beyond. Before such calm external beauty the presence of a vague fear is more distinctly felt—like a raven flapping its slow wing across the sunny air. Nancy wished more and more that Godfrey would come in.
She walked to the front window and gazed as far as she could see down the road, feeling a sense of unease that she knew was childish, since there were no signs of the excitement Jane had mentioned, and Godfrey was unlikely to return via the village road, but rather through the fields. Still, she remained there, observing the peaceful churchyard with the long shadows of the gravestones stretching across the bright green mounds, and the vibrant autumn colors of the Rectory trees in the distance. In the presence of such calm external beauty, a vague fear is felt more acutely—like a raven slowly flapping its wings in the sunny air. Nancy increasingly wished that Godfrey would arrive.
CHAPTER XVIII.
Some one opened the door at the other end of the room, and Nancy felt that it was her husband. She turned from the window with gladness in her eyes, for the wife’s chief dread was stilled.
Someone opened the door at the other end of the room, and Nancy felt it was her husband. She turned from the window with joy in her eyes, for the wife’s main fear was put to rest.
“Dear, I’m so thankful you’re come,” she said, going towards him. “I began to get—”
“Dear, I’m so thankful you came,” she said, walking towards him. “I started to get—”
She paused abruptly, for Godfrey was laying down his hat with trembling hands, and turned towards her with a pale face and a strange unanswering glance, as if he saw her indeed, but saw her as part of a scene invisible to herself. She laid her hand on his arm, not daring to speak again; but he left the touch unnoticed, and threw himself into his chair.
She stopped suddenly, because Godfrey was putting down his hat with shaking hands, and turned to her with a pale face and an odd, blank look, as if he could see her, but saw her as part of a scene she couldn't perceive. She put her hand on his arm, hesitant to speak again; but he ignored her touch and flopped into his chair.
Jane was already at the door with the hissing urn. “Tell her to keep away, will you?” said Godfrey; and when the door was closed again he exerted himself to speak more distinctly.
Jane was already at the door with the hissing kettle. “Tell her to stay away, will you?” said Godfrey; and once the door was closed again, he made an effort to speak more clearly.
“Sit down, Nancy—there,” he said, pointing to a chair opposite him. “I came back as soon as I could, to hinder anybody’s telling you but me. I’ve had a great shock—but I care most about the shock it’ll be to you.”
“Sit down, Nancy—there,” he said, pointing to a chair across from him. “I came back as soon as I could, to prevent anyone else from telling you but me. I’ve had quite a shock—but I’m more concerned about how shocking it will be for you.”
“It isn’t father and Priscilla?” said Nancy, with quivering lips, clasping her hands together tightly on her lap.
“It isn’t Dad and Priscilla?” Nancy said, her lips trembling as she tightly clasped her hands in her lap.
“No, it’s nobody living,” said Godfrey, unequal to the considerate skill with which he would have wished to make his revelation. “It’s Dunstan—my brother Dunstan, that we lost sight of sixteen years ago. We’ve found him—found his body—his skeleton.”
“No, it’s nobody alive,” said Godfrey, unable to match the thoughtful way he would have liked to share his news. “It’s Dunstan—my brother Dunstan, who we lost track of sixteen years ago. We’ve found him—found his body—his skeleton.”
The deep dread Godfrey’s look had created in Nancy made her feel these words a relief. She sat in comparative calmness to hear what else he had to tell. He went on:
The deep fear Godfrey’s gaze had instilled in Nancy made her find these words comforting. She sat with a sense of calm to hear what else he had to say. He continued:
“The Stone-pit has gone dry suddenly—from the draining, I suppose; and there he lies—has lain for sixteen years, wedged between two great stones. There’s his watch and seals, and there’s my gold-handled hunting-whip, with my name on: he took it away, without my knowing, the day he went hunting on Wildfire, the last time he was seen.”
“The stone pit has suddenly dried up—probably from the draining; and there he lies—he’s been there for sixteen years, stuck between two huge stones. There’s his watch and seals, and there’s my gold-handled hunting whip with my name on it: he took it without me knowing, the day he went hunting on Wildfire, the last time anyone saw him.”
Godfrey paused: it was not so easy to say what came next. “Do you think he drowned himself?” said Nancy, almost wondering that her husband should be so deeply shaken by what had happened all those years ago to an unloved brother, of whom worse things had been augured.
Godfrey hesitated; it wasn't easy to figure out what to say next. “Do you think he killed himself?” Nancy asked, almost surprised that her husband could be so affected by something that happened so long ago to a brother who hadn't been loved, especially considering how much worse had been predicted.
“No, he fell in,” said Godfrey, in a low but distinct voice, as if he felt some deep meaning in the fact. Presently he added: “Dunstan was the man that robbed Silas Marner.”
“No, he fell in,” Godfrey said in a quiet but clear voice, as if he sensed something significant in that fact. After a moment, he continued, “Dunstan was the one who robbed Silas Marner.”
The blood rushed to Nancy’s face and neck at this surprise and shame, for she had been bred up to regard even a distant kinship with crime as a dishonour.
The blood rushed to Nancy’s face and neck at this surprise and shame, because she had been raised to see even a distant connection to crime as a disgrace.
“O Godfrey!” she said, with compassion in her tone, for she had immediately reflected that the dishonour must be felt still more keenly by her husband.
“O Godfrey!” she said, her voice filled with compassion, as she quickly realized that the shame must weigh even more heavily on her husband.
“There was the money in the pit,” he continued—“all the weaver’s money. Everything’s been gathered up, and they’re taking the skeleton to the Rainbow. But I came back to tell you: there was no hindering it; you must know.”
“There was money in the pit,” he continued—“all the weaver’s money. Everything has been collected, and they’re taking the skeleton to the Rainbow. But I came back to tell you: there was no stopping it; you need to know.”
He was silent, looking on the ground for two long minutes. Nancy would have said some words of comfort under this disgrace, but she refrained, from an instinctive sense that there was something behind—that Godfrey had something else to tell her. Presently he lifted his eyes to her face, and kept them fixed on her, as he said—
He stayed quiet, staring at the ground for two long minutes. Nancy wanted to say something comforting about this shameful situation, but she held back, sensing instinctively that there was more to it—that Godfrey had something else to share with her. Eventually, he raised his gaze to her face and kept his eyes locked on hers as he said—
“Everything comes to light, Nancy, sooner or later. When God Almighty wills it, our secrets are found out. I’ve lived with a secret on my mind, but I’ll keep it from you no longer. I wouldn’t have you know it by somebody else, and not by me—I wouldn’t have you find it out after I’m dead. I’ll tell you now. It’s been ‘I will’ and ‘I won’t’ with me all my life—I’ll make sure of myself now.”
“Everything eventually comes to light, Nancy, whether we like it or not. When the Almighty decides, our secrets get revealed. I've carried this secret for a long time, but I won’t hide it from you any longer. I’d rather you hear it from me than from someone else—I wouldn’t want you to find out after I’m gone. I’ll tell you now. It’s been a constant struggle between ‘I will’ and ‘I won’t’ my whole life—I’ll take control of myself now.”
Nancy’s utmost dread had returned. The eyes of the husband and wife met with awe in them, as at a crisis which suspended affection.
Nancy's deepest fear had come back. The husband and wife exchanged looks filled with wonder, as if caught in a moment that paused their love.
“Nancy,” said Godfrey, slowly, “when I married you, I hid something from you—something I ought to have told you. That woman Marner found dead in the snow—Eppie’s mother—that wretched woman—was my wife: Eppie is my child.”
“Nancy,” Godfrey said slowly, “when I married you, I kept something from you—something I should have told you. That woman Marner found dead in the snow—Eppie’s mother—that miserable woman—was my wife: Eppie is my child.”
He paused, dreading the effect of his confession. But Nancy sat quite still, only that her eyes dropped and ceased to meet his. She was pale and quiet as a meditative statue, clasping her hands on her lap.
He paused, fearing the impact of his confession. But Nancy sat completely still, only letting her eyes drop and stop meeting his. She was pale and quiet like a thoughtful statue, resting her hands on her lap.
“You’ll never think the same of me again,” said Godfrey, after a little while, with some tremor in his voice.
“You'll never see me the same way again,” said Godfrey, after a moment, with a slight shake in his voice.
She was silent.
She didn’t say anything.
“I oughtn’t to have left the child unowned: I oughtn’t to have kept it from you. But I couldn’t bear to give you up, Nancy. I was led away into marrying her—I suffered for it.”
“I shouldn’t have left the child without anyone to claim them: I shouldn’t have kept this from you. But I couldn’t stand to let you go, Nancy. I was pushed into marrying her—I paid the price for it.”
Still Nancy was silent, looking down; and he almost expected that she would presently get up and say she would go to her father’s. How could she have any mercy for faults that must seem so black to her, with her simple, severe notions?
Still, Nancy was quiet, staring at the ground; and he almost thought she would soon stand up and say she was going to her father’s. How could she have any sympathy for mistakes that must appear so terrible to her, with her straightforward, strict ideas?
But at last she lifted up her eyes to his again and spoke. There was no indignation in her voice—only deep regret.
But finally, she looked up at him again and spoke. There was no anger in her voice—only deep regret.
“Godfrey, if you had but told me this six years ago, we could have done some of our duty by the child. Do you think I’d have refused to take her in, if I’d known she was yours?”
“Godfrey, if you had just told me this six years ago, we could have taken care of the child. Do you really think I would have said no to taking her in if I had known she was yours?”
At that moment Godfrey felt all the bitterness of an error that was not simply futile, but had defeated its own end. He had not measured this wife with whom he had lived so long. But she spoke again, with more agitation.
At that moment, Godfrey felt the full weight of a mistake that was not just pointless but had actually undermined its own purpose. He had never truly understood this wife he had lived with for so long. But she spoke again, her agitation growing.
“And—Oh, Godfrey—if we’d had her from the first, if you’d taken to her as you ought, she’d have loved me for her mother—and you’d have been happier with me: I could better have bore my little baby dying, and our life might have been more like what we used to think it ’ud be.”
“And—Oh, Godfrey—if we’d had her from the beginning, if you’d embraced her like you should have, she’d have loved me as her mother—and you would have been happier with me: I could have handled my little baby dying better, and our life could have been more like what we used to imagine it would be.”
The tears fell, and Nancy ceased to speak.
The tears fell, and Nancy stopped talking.
“But you wouldn’t have married me then, Nancy, if I’d told you,” said Godfrey, urged, in the bitterness of his self-reproach, to prove to himself that his conduct had not been utter folly. “You may think you would now, but you wouldn’t then. With your pride and your father’s, you’d have hated having anything to do with me after the talk there’d have been.”
“But you wouldn’t have married me back then, Nancy, if I had told you,” Godfrey said, pushed by the bitterness of his self-blame to convince himself that his actions hadn't been completely foolish. “You might think you would now, but you wouldn't have then. With your pride and your father's, you would have hated being associated with me after all the gossip there would have been.”
“I can’t say what I should have done about that, Godfrey. I should never have married anybody else. But I wasn’t worth doing wrong for—nothing is in this world. Nothing is so good as it seems beforehand—not even our marrying wasn’t, you see.” There was a faint sad smile on Nancy’s face as she said the last words.
“I can’t say what I should have done about that, Godfrey. I should never have married anyone else. But I wasn’t worth doing wrong for—
“I’m a worse man than you thought I was, Nancy,” said Godfrey, rather tremulously. “Can you forgive me ever?”
“I’m a worse person than you thought I was, Nancy,” said Godfrey, a bit shakily. “Can you ever forgive me?”
“The wrong to me is but little, Godfrey: you’ve made it up to me—you’ve been good to me for fifteen years. It’s another you did the wrong to; and I doubt it can never be all made up for.”
“The wrong to me is just a small thing, Godfrey: you’ve made it up to me—you’ve treated me well for fifteen years. It’s someone else you did wrong to; and I doubt it can ever truly be made right.”
“But we can take Eppie now,” said Godfrey. “I won’t mind the world knowing at last. I’ll be plain and open for the rest o’ my life.”
“But we can take Eppie now,” Godfrey said. “I won’t mind the world knowing at last. I’ll be straightforward and honest for the rest of my life.”
“It’ll be different coming to us, now she’s grown up,” said Nancy, shaking her head sadly. “But it’s your duty to acknowledge her and provide for her; and I’ll do my part by her, and pray to God Almighty to make her love me.”
“It’ll be different having her with us now that she’s grown up,” said Nancy, shaking her head sadly. “But it’s your responsibility to recognize her and take care of her; and I’ll do my part for her, and pray to God Almighty to make her love me.”
“Then we’ll go together to Silas Marner’s this very night, as soon as everything’s quiet at the Stone-pits.”
“Then we’ll go together to Silas Marner’s tonight, as soon as things are calm at the Stone-pits.”
CHAPTER XIX.
Between eight and nine o’clock that evening, Eppie and Silas were seated alone in the cottage. After the great excitement the weaver had undergone from the events of the afternoon, he had felt a longing for this quietude, and had even begged Mrs. Winthrop and Aaron, who had naturally lingered behind every one else, to leave him alone with his child. The excitement had not passed away: it had only reached that stage when the keenness of the susceptibility makes external stimulus intolerable—when there is no sense of weariness, but rather an intensity of inward life, under which sleep is an impossibility. Any one who has watched such moments in other men remembers the brightness of the eyes and the strange definiteness that comes over coarse features from that transient influence. It is as if a new fineness of ear for all spiritual voices had sent wonder-working vibrations through the heavy mortal frame—as if “beauty born of murmuring sound” had passed into the face of the listener.
Between eight and nine that evening, Eppie and Silas were sitting alone in the cottage. After the intense excitement the weaver had experienced from the afternoon's events, he longed for this peacefulness and even asked Mrs. Winthrop and Aaron, who had naturally lingered behind everyone else, to leave him alone with his child. The excitement hadn’t faded; it had just reached that point where heightened sensitivity makes any outside stimulus unbearable—when there’s no sense of tiredness, but rather an intensity of inner life that makes sleep impossible. Anyone who has seen such moments in others remembers the brightness in their eyes and the strange clarity that appears on rough features from that fleeting influence. It’s as if a new sensitivity to all spiritual sounds has sent transformative vibrations through the heavy human body—as if “beauty born of murmuring sound” has entered the listener’s face.
Silas’s face showed that sort of transfiguration, as he sat in his arm-chair and looked at Eppie. She had drawn her own chair towards his knees, and leaned forward, holding both his hands, while she looked up at him. On the table near them, lit by a candle, lay the recovered gold—the old long-loved gold, ranged in orderly heaps, as Silas used to range it in the days when it was his only joy. He had been telling her how he used to count it every night, and how his soul was utterly desolate till she was sent to him.
Silas’s face reflected a kind of transformation as he sat in his armchair, looking at Eppie. She had pulled her chair closer to him and leaned forward, holding both of his hands while gazing up at him. On the table beside them, illuminated by a candle, lay the gold he had recovered—the old, beloved gold, neatly stacked as Silas used to arrange it in the days when it was his only source of happiness. He had been sharing with her how he used to count it every night and how his heart felt completely empty until she came into his life.
“At first, I’d a sort o’ feeling come across me now and then,” he was saying in a subdued tone, “as if you might be changed into the gold again; for sometimes, turn my head which way I would, I seemed to see the gold; and I thought I should be glad if I could feel it, and find it was come back. But that didn’t last long. After a bit, I should have thought it was a curse come again, if it had drove you from me, for I’d got to feel the need o’ your looks and your voice and the touch o’ your little fingers. You didn’t know then, Eppie, when you were such a little un—you didn’t know what your old father Silas felt for you.”
“At first, I had this feeling every once in a while,” he said in a quiet voice, “like you might turn back into gold again; because sometimes, no matter how I turned my head, I seemed to see the gold, and I thought I’d be happy if I could feel it and find out it was back. But that didn’t last long. After a while, I would have thought it was a curse again if it drove you away from me, because I had come to need your looks, your voice, and the feel of your tiny fingers. You didn’t know back then, Eppie, when you were so little—you didn’t know what your old father Silas felt for you.”
“But I know now, father,” said Eppie. “If it hadn’t been for you, they’d have taken me to the workhouse, and there’d have been nobody to love me.”
“But I know now, Dad,” said Eppie. “If it hadn’t been for you, they would have sent me to the workhouse, and there wouldn’t have been anyone to love me.”
“Eh, my precious child, the blessing was mine. If you hadn’t been sent to save me, I should ha’ gone to the grave in my misery. The money was taken away from me in time; and you see it’s been kept—kept till it was wanted for you. It’s wonderful—our life is wonderful.”
“Hey, my dear child, the blessing was mine. If you hadn’t been sent to save me, I would have gone to the grave in my misery. The money was taken from me in time, and you see it’s been saved—saved until it was needed for you. It’s amazing—our life is amazing.”
Silas sat in silence a few minutes, looking at the money. “It takes no hold of me now,” he said, ponderingly—“the money doesn’t. I wonder if it ever could again—I doubt it might, if I lost you, Eppie. I might come to think I was forsaken again, and lose the feeling that God was good to me.”
Silas sat quietly for a few minutes, staring at the money. “It doesn’t mean anything to me now,” he said thoughtfully—“the money doesn’t. I wonder if it ever could again—I doubt it would, if I lost you, Eppie. I might start to feel abandoned again and lose the sense that God was good to me.”
At that moment there was a knocking at the door; and Eppie was obliged to rise without answering Silas. Beautiful she looked, with the tenderness of gathering tears in her eyes and a slight flush on her cheeks, as she stepped to open the door. The flush deepened when she saw Mr. and Mrs. Godfrey Cass. She made her little rustic curtsy, and held the door wide for them to enter.
At that moment, there was a knock at the door, and Eppie had to stand up without replying to Silas. She looked beautiful, with tears welling in her eyes and a slight blush on her cheeks, as she walked to open the door. The blush deepened when she saw Mr. and Mrs. Godfrey Cass. She did a little rustic curtsy and opened the door wide for them to come in.
“We’re disturbing you very late, my dear,” said Mrs. Cass, taking Eppie’s hand, and looking in her face with an expression of anxious interest and admiration. Nancy herself was pale and tremulous.
“We're bothering you very late, my dear,” said Mrs. Cass, taking Eppie's hand and looking at her with an expression of worried interest and admiration. Nancy herself was pale and shaky.
Eppie, after placing chairs for Mr. and Mrs. Cass, went to stand against Silas, opposite to them.
Eppie, after setting up chairs for Mr. and Mrs. Cass, went to stand beside Silas, facing them.
“Well, Marner,” said Godfrey, trying to speak with perfect firmness, “it’s a great comfort to me to see you with your money again, that you’ve been deprived of so many years. It was one of my family did you the wrong—the more grief to me—and I feel bound to make up to you for it in every way. Whatever I can do for you will be nothing but paying a debt, even if I looked no further than the robbery. But there are other things I’m beholden—shall be beholden to you for, Marner.”
"Well, Marner," Godfrey said, trying to sound completely confident, "it's such a relief to see you with your money again after all these years. It was a member of my family who wronged you—it's a shame for me—and I feel obligated to make it right in every way I can. Anything I do for you will just be repaying a debt, even if I only consider the theft. But there are other things I owe to you, Marner."
Godfrey checked himself. It had been agreed between him and his wife that the subject of his fatherhood should be approached very carefully, and that, if possible, the disclosure should be reserved for the future, so that it might be made to Eppie gradually. Nancy had urged this, because she felt strongly the painful light in which Eppie must inevitably see the relation between her father and mother.
Godfrey took a moment to collect himself. He and his wife had decided to handle the topic of his fatherhood with great caution, and they agreed that, if possible, the revelation should be saved for later, so it could be introduced to Eppie gradually. Nancy had insisted on this approach because she was very aware of the difficult way Eppie would likely view the relationship between her father and mother.
Silas, always ill at ease when he was being spoken to by “betters,” such as Mr. Cass—tall, powerful, florid men, seen chiefly on horseback—answered with some constraint—
Silas, always uncomfortable when talking to "superiors," like Mr. Cass—tall, strong, and ruddy men, usually seen on horseback—responded with a bit of awkwardness—
“Sir, I’ve a deal to thank you for a’ready. As for the robbery, I count it no loss to me. And if I did, you couldn’t help it: you aren’t answerable for it.”
“Sir, I have a deal to thank you for already. As for the robbery, I see it as no loss to me. And even if I did, you couldn't do anything about it: you’re not responsible for it.”
“You may look at it in that way, Marner, but I never can; and I hope you’ll let me act according to my own feeling of what’s just. I know you’re easily contented: you’ve been a hard-working man all your life.”
“You might see it that way, Marner, but I never will; and I hope you'll allow me to act based on my own sense of what’s right. I know you’re easily satisfied: you’ve been a hard worker your entire life.”
“Yes, sir, yes,” said Marner, meditatively. “I should ha’ been bad off without my work: it was what I held by when everything else was gone from me.”
“Yes, sir, yes,” Marner said thoughtfully. “I would have been in a tough spot without my work: it was what I clung to when everything else was taken from me.”
“Ah,” said Godfrey, applying Marner’s words simply to his bodily wants, “it was a good trade for you in this country, because there’s been a great deal of linen-weaving to be done. But you’re getting rather past such close work, Marner: it’s time you laid by and had some rest. You look a good deal pulled down, though you’re not an old man, are you?”
“Ah,” Godfrey said, taking Marner’s words only as they related to his physical needs, “this was a good trade for you here because there’s been a lot of linen-weaving to do. But you’re getting a bit too old for such detailed work, Marner: it’s time you saved up and took some time to rest. You look pretty worn out, even though you’re not an old man, are you?”
“Fifty-five, as near as I can say, sir,” said Silas.
“Fifty-five, as far as I can tell, sir,” said Silas.
“Oh, why, you may live thirty years longer—look at old Macey! And that money on the table, after all, is but little. It won’t go far either way—whether it’s put out to interest, or you were to live on it as long as it would last: it wouldn’t go far if you’d nobody to keep but yourself, and you’ve had two to keep for a good many years now.”
“Oh, you could live thirty more years—just look at old Macey! And that money on the table is just a small amount. It won’t last long either way—whether you invest it or try to live off it for as long as it’ll last: it wouldn’t stretch very far even if it was just for you, and you’ve had to support two people for quite a few years now.”
“Eh, sir,” said Silas, unaffected by anything Godfrey was saying, “I’m in no fear o’ want. We shall do very well—Eppie and me ’ull do well enough. There’s few working-folks have got so much laid by as that. I don’t know what it is to gentlefolks, but I look upon it as a deal—almost too much. And as for us, it’s little we want.”
“Hey, sir,” said Silas, ignoring everything Godfrey was saying, “I’m not worried about going without. Eppie and I will be just fine. There are not many workers who have saved up as much as we have. I don’t know what it means to wealthy people, but I see it as quite a lot—almost too much. And for us, we need very little.”
“Only the garden, father,” said Eppie, blushing up to the ears the moment after.
“Just the garden, Dad,” Eppie said, her face turning bright red immediately after.
“You love a garden, do you, my dear?” said Nancy, thinking that this turn in the point of view might help her husband. “We should agree in that: I give a deal of time to the garden.”
“You love a garden, don’t you, my dear?” said Nancy, hoping that this change in perspective might help her husband. “We should be on the same page about that: I spend a lot of time in the garden.”
“Ah, there’s plenty of gardening at the Red House,” said Godfrey, surprised at the difficulty he found in approaching a proposition which had seemed so easy to him in the distance. “You’ve done a good part by Eppie, Marner, for sixteen years. It ’ud be a great comfort to you to see her well provided for, wouldn’t it? She looks blooming and healthy, but not fit for any hardships: she doesn’t look like a strapping girl come of working parents. You’d like to see her taken care of by those who can leave her well off, and make a lady of her; she’s more fit for it than for a rough life, such as she might come to have in a few years’ time.”
“Ah, there’s a lot of gardening at the Red House,” Godfrey said, surprised at the difficulty he had in bringing up a suggestion that had seemed so simple to him from afar. “You’ve done a good job looking after Eppie, Marner, for sixteen years. It would really comfort you to see her well taken care of, wouldn’t it? She looks vibrant and healthy, but she’s not cut out for any hardships: she doesn’t seem like a strong girl from working-class parents. You’d want to see her cared for by people who can give her a good life and help her become a lady; she’s more suited for that than for a tough life, like the one she might end up having in a few years.”
A slight flush came over Marner’s face, and disappeared, like a passing gleam. Eppie was simply wondering Mr. Cass should talk so about things that seemed to have nothing to do with reality; but Silas was hurt and uneasy.
A faint blush tinted Marner’s face and quickly faded, like a brief flash of light. Eppie was just curious why Mr. Cass would talk about things that seemed completely unrelated to reality, but Silas felt hurt and anxious.
“I don’t take your meaning, sir,” he answered, not having words at command to express the mingled feelings with which he had heard Mr. Cass’s words.
"I don't understand what you mean, sir," he replied, struggling to find the words to express the mixed emotions he felt after hearing Mr. Cass's words.
“Well, my meaning is this, Marner,” said Godfrey, determined to come to the point. “Mrs. Cass and I, you know, have no children—nobody to benefit by our good home and everything else we have—more than enough for ourselves. And we should like to have somebody in the place of a daughter to us—we should like to have Eppie, and treat her in every way as our own child. It ’ud be a great comfort to you in your old age, I hope, to see her fortune made in that way, after you’ve been at the trouble of bringing her up so well. And it’s right you should have every reward for that. And Eppie, I’m sure, will always love you and be grateful to you: she’d come and see you very often, and we should all be on the look-out to do everything we could towards making you comfortable.”
“Well, what I mean is this, Marner,” said Godfrey, determined to get to the point. “Mrs. Cass and I don’t have any kids—no one to benefit from our good home and everything else we have—more than enough for ourselves. We would like to have someone to fill the role of a daughter—we’d like to have Eppie and treat her just like our own child. It would be a great comfort for you in your old age, I hope, to see her future secured in that way, after you’ve put in the effort to raise her so well. And you deserve every bit of reward for that. I’m sure Eppie will always love you and be grateful to you: she’d come to visit you often, and we would all do our best to make you comfortable.”
A plain man like Godfrey Cass, speaking under some embarrassment, necessarily blunders on words that are coarser than his intentions, and that are likely to fall gratingly on susceptible feelings. While he had been speaking, Eppie had quietly passed her arm behind Silas’s head, and let her hand rest against it caressingly: she felt him trembling violently. He was silent for some moments when Mr. Cass had ended—powerless under the conflict of emotions, all alike painful. Eppie’s heart was swelling at the sense that her father was in distress; and she was just going to lean down and speak to him, when one struggling dread at last gained the mastery over every other in Silas, and he said, faintly—
A straightforward guy like Godfrey Cass, speaking a bit awkwardly, tends to fumble with words that come out rougher than he means them to and are likely to upset sensitive feelings. While he was talking, Eppie had softly looped her arm around Silas’s head, letting her hand rest against it gently: she could feel him shaking intensely. He stayed silent for a few moments after Mr. Cass finished—overwhelmed by a mix of painful emotions. Eppie’s heart ached knowing her father was upset; she was just about to lean down and talk to him when one overwhelming fear finally took hold of all the others in Silas, and he said, faintly—
“Eppie, my child, speak. I won’t stand in your way. Thank Mr. and Mrs. Cass.”
“Eppie, my child, go ahead and speak. I won’t stop you. Thank Mr. and Mrs. Cass.”
Eppie took her hand from her father’s head, and came forward a step. Her cheeks were flushed, but not with shyness this time: the sense that her father was in doubt and suffering banished that sort of self-consciousness. She dropped a low curtsy, first to Mrs. Cass and then to Mr. Cass, and said—
Eppie lifted her hand from her dad's head and stepped forward. Her cheeks were pink, but not from shyness this time: the feeling that her dad was uncertain and in pain pushed away any self-consciousness. She made a slight curtsy, first to Mrs. Cass and then to Mr. Cass, and said—
“Thank you, ma’am—thank you, sir. But I can’t leave my father, nor own anybody nearer than him. And I don’t want to be a lady—thank you all the same” (here Eppie dropped another curtsy). “I couldn’t give up the folks I’ve been used to.”
“Thank you, ma’am—thank you, sir. But I can’t leave my dad, nor do I own anyone closer than him. And I don’t want to be a lady—thanks anyway” (here Eppie dropped another curtsy). “I couldn’t give up the people I’ve gotten used to.”
Eppie’s lips began to tremble a little at the last words. She retreated to her father’s chair again, and held him round the neck: while Silas, with a subdued sob, put up his hand to grasp hers.
Eppie’s lips started to quiver a bit at the last words. She went back to her father’s chair and wrapped her arms around his neck, while Silas, with a quiet sob, reached out to hold her hand.
The tears were in Nancy’s eyes, but her sympathy with Eppie was, naturally, divided with distress on her husband’s account. She dared not speak, wondering what was going on in her husband’s mind.
The tears were in Nancy’s eyes, but her sympathy for Eppie was, of course, mixed with worry for her husband. She didn’t dare to say anything, wondering what her husband was thinking.
Godfrey felt an irritation inevitable to almost all of us when we encounter an unexpected obstacle. He had been full of his own penitence and resolution to retrieve his error as far as the time was left to him; he was possessed with all-important feelings, that were to lead to a predetermined course of action which he had fixed on as the right, and he was not prepared to enter with lively appreciation into other people’s feelings counteracting his virtuous resolves. The agitation with which he spoke again was not quite unmixed with anger.
Godfrey experienced the irritation that almost everyone feels when faced with an unexpected obstacle. He was consumed with his own guilt and determination to correct his mistake while he still had time. He was driven by all-consuming feelings that were leading him down the path he believed was right, and he wasn’t ready to fully engage with the feelings of others that conflicted with his noble intentions. The agitation in his voice when he spoke again was tinged with anger.
“But I’ve a claim on you, Eppie—the strongest of all claims. It’s my duty, Marner, to own Eppie as my child, and provide for her. She is my own child—her mother was my wife. I’ve a natural claim on her that must stand before every other.”
“But I have a claim on you, Eppie—the strongest of all claims. It’s my responsibility, Marner, to acknowledge Eppie as my child and to take care of her. She is my own child—her mother was my wife. I have a natural claim on her that takes priority over everything else.”
Eppie had given a violent start, and turned quite pale. Silas, on the contrary, who had been relieved, by Eppie’s answer, from the dread lest his mind should be in opposition to hers, felt the spirit of resistance in him set free, not without a touch of parental fierceness. “Then, sir,” he answered, with an accent of bitterness that had been silent in him since the memorable day when his youthful hope had perished—“then, sir, why didn’t you say so sixteen year ago, and claim her before I’d come to love her, i’stead o’ coming to take her from me now, when you might as well take the heart out o’ my body? God gave her to me because you turned your back upon her, and He looks upon her as mine: you’ve no right to her! When a man turns a blessing from his door, it falls to them as take it in.”
Eppie jumped up suddenly and turned pale. Silas, on the other hand, feeling relieved by Eppie’s response, realized that the fear of being at odds with her was gone, and he felt a surge of defiance, mixed with a bit of protective anger. “Then, sir,” he replied, his voice laced with bitterness that had been buried since that fateful day when his young hopes were crushed—“then, sir, why didn’t you say something sixteen years ago and claim her before I grew to love her, instead of trying to take her from me now, as if you could rip my heart out? God gave her to me because you turned your back on her, and He sees her as mine: you have no right to her! When a man pushes away a blessing, it falls to those who are willing to embrace it.”
“I know that, Marner. I was wrong. I’ve repented of my conduct in that matter,” said Godfrey, who could not help feeling the edge of Silas’s words.
“I know that, Marner. I was wrong. I’ve regretted my actions in that situation,” said Godfrey, who couldn’t help but feel the sting of Silas’s words.
“I’m glad to hear it, sir,” said Marner, with gathering excitement; “but repentance doesn’t alter what’s been going on for sixteen year. Your coming now and saying ‘I’m her father’ doesn’t alter the feelings inside us. It’s me she’s been calling her father ever since she could say the word.”
“I’m really glad to hear that, sir,” Marner said, his excitement growing. “But just feeling sorry doesn’t change what’s been happening for sixteen years. You coming here and saying ‘I’m her father’ doesn’t change how we feel. I’m the one she’s been calling her father ever since she could say the word.”
“But I think you might look at the thing more reasonably, Marner,” said Godfrey, unexpectedly awed by the weaver’s direct truth-speaking. “It isn’t as if she was to be taken quite away from you, so that you’d never see her again. She’ll be very near you, and come to see you very often. She’ll feel just the same towards you.”
“But I think you could look at this more reasonably, Marner,” said Godfrey, surprisingly impressed by the weaver’s straightforward honesty. “It’s not like she’s being completely taken away from you, so you’d never see her again. She’ll be really close to you and come to visit you often. She’ll feel the same way about you.”
“Just the same?” said Marner, more bitterly than ever. “How’ll she feel just the same for me as she does now, when we eat o’ the same bit, and drink o’ the same cup, and think o’ the same things from one day’s end to another? Just the same? that’s idle talk. You’d cut us i’ two.”
“Just the same?” Marner said, more bitter than ever. “How can she feel just the same for me as she does now when we share the same food, drink from the same cup, and think about the same things every single day? Just the same? That’s nonsense. You’d split us in two.”
Godfrey, unqualified by experience to discern the pregnancy of Marner’s simple words, felt rather angry again. It seemed to him that the weaver was very selfish (a judgment readily passed by those who have never tested their own power of sacrifice) to oppose what was undoubtedly for Eppie’s welfare; and he felt himself called upon, for her sake, to assert his authority.
Godfrey, lacking the experience to understand the meaning behind Marner’s simple words, felt frustrated once more. It seemed to him that the weaver was being very selfish (a judgment often made by those who have never had to sacrifice anything themselves) by opposing what was clearly in Eppie’s best interest; and he felt compelled, for her sake, to assert his authority.
“I should have thought, Marner,” he said, severely—“I should have thought your affection for Eppie would make you rejoice in what was for her good, even if it did call upon you to give up something. You ought to remember your own life’s uncertain, and she’s at an age now when her lot may soon be fixed in a way very different from what it would be in her father’s home: she may marry some low working-man, and then, whatever I might do for her, I couldn’t make her well-off. You’re putting yourself in the way of her welfare; and though I’m sorry to hurt you after what you’ve done, and what I’ve left undone, I feel now it’s my duty to insist on taking care of my own daughter. I want to do my duty.”
“I should have thought, Marner,” he said sternly, “I would have thought your love for Eppie would make you happy about what’s best for her, even if it means you have to give up something. You should remember that your own life is uncertain, and she’s at an age when her future could be set in a way that’s very different from what it would be in her father’s home: she could marry some low-paid worker, and then, no matter what I might do for her, I couldn’t make her well-off. You’re putting yourself in the way of her well-being; and even though I regret hurting you after what you’ve done and what I haven’t done, I feel now it’s my responsibility to take care of my own daughter. I want to do my part.”
It would be difficult to say whether it were Silas or Eppie that was more deeply stirred by this last speech of Godfrey’s. Thought had been very busy in Eppie as she listened to the contest between her old long-loved father and this new unfamiliar father who had suddenly come to fill the place of that black featureless shadow which had held the ring and placed it on her mother’s finger. Her imagination had darted backward in conjectures, and forward in previsions, of what this revealed fatherhood implied; and there were words in Godfrey’s last speech which helped to make the previsions especially definite. Not that these thoughts, either of past or future, determined her resolution—that was determined by the feelings which vibrated to every word Silas had uttered; but they raised, even apart from these feelings, a repulsion towards the offered lot and the newly-revealed father.
It’s hard to tell whether Silas or Eppie was more affected by Godfrey’s last speech. Eppie’s mind was racing as she listened to the argument between her beloved father and this new, unfamiliar figure who had suddenly taken the place of the dark, vague shadow that had given her mother the ring. Her imagination flipped back and forth between speculations about the past and thoughts about what this new fatherhood meant for her future; there were words in Godfrey’s speech that made those future thoughts feel particularly clear. However, these thoughts about the past or the future didn’t shape her decision—that was shaped by the emotions that resonated with every word Silas had spoken. Still, they stirred up a sense of rejection toward the new offer and the recently revealed father.
Silas, on the other hand, was again stricken in conscience, and alarmed lest Godfrey’s accusation should be true—lest he should be raising his own will as an obstacle to Eppie’s good. For many moments he was mute, struggling for the self-conquest necessary to the uttering of the difficult words. They came out tremulously.
Silas, on the other hand, was once again hit with guilt and anxious that Godfrey’s accusation might be true—fearing he might be putting his own will in the way of Eppie’s well-being. For several moments, he was silent, battling for the self-control needed to say the hard words. They came out shakily.
“I’ll say no more. Let it be as you will. Speak to the child. I’ll hinder nothing.”
“I won’t say anything else. Do what you want. Talk to the kid. I won’t stop you.”
Even Nancy, with all the acute sensibility of her own affections, shared her husband’s view, that Marner was not justifiable in his wish to retain Eppie, after her real father had avowed himself. She felt that it was a very hard trial for the poor weaver, but her code allowed no question that a father by blood must have a claim above that of any foster-father. Besides, Nancy, used all her life to plenteous circumstances and the privileges of “respectability,” could not enter into the pleasures which early nurture and habit connect with all the little aims and efforts of the poor who are born poor: to her mind, Eppie, in being restored to her birthright, was entering on a too long withheld but unquestionable good. Hence she heard Silas’s last words with relief, and thought, as Godfrey did, that their wish was achieved.
Even Nancy, with all the sensitivity of her own feelings, agreed with her husband that Marner had no right to keep Eppie after her real father had acknowledged himself. She recognized it was a tough situation for the poor weaver, but her beliefs didn’t allow for the idea that a father by blood didn't have a higher claim than any foster-father. Besides, Nancy, having spent her life in comfort and the privileges of “respectability,” couldn’t understand the joy connected to the small goals and struggles of those born into poverty: in her view, Eppie was reclaiming something that had been unjustly denied to her. So, she listened to Silas’s final words with relief and thought, just like Godfrey did, that their desire was fulfilled.
“Eppie, my dear,” said Godfrey, looking at his daughter, not without some embarrassment, under the sense that she was old enough to judge him, “it’ll always be our wish that you should show your love and gratitude to one who’s been a father to you so many years, and we shall want to help you to make him comfortable in every way. But we hope you’ll come to love us as well; and though I haven’t been what a father should ha’ been to you all these years, I wish to do the utmost in my power for you for the rest of my life, and provide for you as my only child. And you’ll have the best of mothers in my wife—that’ll be a blessing you haven’t known since you were old enough to know it.”
“Eppie, my dear,” Godfrey said, looking at his daughter with a bit of embarrassment, aware that she was old enough to judge him, “we always want you to show your love and gratitude to someone who’s been like a father to you for so many years, and we want to help you make him comfortable in every way. But we hope you’ll come to love us too; and even though I haven’t been the father you deserved all these years, I want to do everything I can for you for the rest of my life, and take care of you as my only child. You’ll have the best mother in my wife—that’s a blessing you haven’t had since you were old enough to appreciate it.”
“My dear, you’ll be a treasure to me,” said Nancy, in her gentle voice. “We shall want for nothing when we have our daughter.”
“My dear, you’ll be a treasure to me,” said Nancy, in her gentle voice. “We won’t need anything else when we have our daughter.”
Eppie did not come forward and curtsy, as she had done before. She held Silas’s hand in hers, and grasped it firmly—it was a weaver’s hand, with a palm and finger-tips that were sensitive to such pressure—while she spoke with colder decision than before.
Eppie didn’t step forward and curtsy like she had before. She held Silas’s hand in hers, gripping it tightly—it was a weaver’s hand, with a palm and fingertips that were sensitive to that kind of pressure—while she spoke with a colder certainty than before.
“Thank you, ma’am—thank you, sir, for your offers—they’re very great, and far above my wish. For I should have no delight i’ life any more if I was forced to go away from my father, and knew he was sitting at home, a-thinking of me and feeling lone. We’ve been used to be happy together every day, and I can’t think o’ no happiness without him. And he says he’d nobody i’ the world till I was sent to him, and he’d have nothing when I was gone. And he’s took care of me and loved me from the first, and I’ll cleave to him as long as he lives, and nobody shall ever come between him and me.”
“Thank you, ma’am—thank you, sir, for your offers—they're very generous and more than I could hope for. I wouldn’t find any joy in life if I had to leave my father and knew he was at home, thinking about me and feeling lonely. We're used to being happy together every day, and I can't imagine happiness without him. He says he had no one in the world until I was sent to him, and he’d have nothing when I’m gone. He’s taken care of me and loved me since the beginning, and I’ll stick by him as long as he lives, and no one will ever come between us.”
“But you must make sure, Eppie,” said Silas, in a low voice—“you must make sure as you won’t ever be sorry, because you’ve made your choice to stay among poor folks, and with poor clothes and things, when you might ha’ had everything o’ the best.”
“But you need to be sure, Eppie,” Silas said softly, “you have to be certain that you won’t ever regret it, because you’ve chosen to stay with poor people and with humble clothes and things, when you could have had the very best.”
His sensitiveness on this point had increased as he listened to Eppie’s words of faithful affection.
His sensitivity on this point had grown as he listened to Eppie’s words of genuine love.
“I can never be sorry, father,” said Eppie. “I shouldn’t know what to think on or to wish for with fine things about me, as I haven’t been used to. And it ’ud be poor work for me to put on things, and ride in a gig, and sit in a place at church, as ’ud make them as I’m fond of think me unfitting company for ’em. What could I care for then?”
“I can never regret it, dad,” Eppie said. “I wouldn’t know what to think about or wish for with fancy things around me, since I’m not used to that. And it would feel wrong for me to wear nice clothes, ride in a carriage, and sit in a prominent spot at church, making those I care about think I’m an unsuitable companion for them. What would I even care about then?”
Nancy looked at Godfrey with a pained questioning glance. But his eyes were fixed on the floor, where he was moving the end of his stick, as if he were pondering on something absently. She thought there was a word which might perhaps come better from her lips than from his.
Nancy looked at Godfrey with a confused and hurt expression. But his gaze was fixed on the floor, where he was absentmindedly moving the tip of his stick, as if he was lost in thought. She felt there was a word that might come more naturally from her than from him.
“What you say is natural, my dear child—it’s natural you should cling to those who’ve brought you up,” she said, mildly; “but there’s a duty you owe to your lawful father. There’s perhaps something to be given up on more sides than one. When your father opens his home to you, I think it’s right you shouldn’t turn your back on it.”
“What you’re saying makes sense, my dear child—it’s only natural to hold on to those who raised you,” she said gently; “but you have a responsibility to your biological father. It might mean letting go of certain things from different sides. When your father welcomes you into his home, I believe it’s important not to reject that."
“I can’t feel as I’ve got any father but one,” said Eppie, impetuously, while the tears gathered. “I’ve always thought of a little home where he’d sit i’ the corner, and I should fend and do everything for him: I can’t think o’ no other home. I wasn’t brought up to be a lady, and I can’t turn my mind to it. I like the working-folks, and their victuals, and their ways. And,” she ended passionately, while the tears fell, “I’m promised to marry a working-man, as’ll live with father, and help me to take care of him.”
“I can’t feel like I have any father but one,” Eppie said impulsively, as tears welled up in her eyes. “I’ve always imagined a little home where he’d sit in the corner, and I’d take care of everything for him: I can’t picture any other home. I wasn’t raised to be a lady, and I can’t wrap my head around it. I like the working-class people, their food, and their ways. And,” she concluded passionately, as the tears streamed down her face, “I’m engaged to marry a working-man who will live with my father and help me take care of him.”
Godfrey looked up at Nancy with a flushed face and smarting dilated eyes. This frustration of a purpose towards which he had set out under the exalted consciousness that he was about to compensate in some degree for the greatest demerit of his life, made him feel the air of the room stifling.
Godfrey looked up at Nancy with a flushed face and stinging dilated eyes. This frustration of a goal he had aimed for, feeling elevated because he was about to make up for the biggest mistake of his life, made the air in the room feel suffocating.
“Let us go,” he said, in an under-tone.
“Let’s go,” he said softly.
“We won’t talk of this any longer now,” said Nancy, rising. “We’re your well-wishers, my dear—and yours too, Marner. We shall come and see you again. It’s getting late now.”
“We won’t discuss this anymore for now,” said Nancy, getting up. “We’re your supporters, my dear—and yours too, Marner. We’ll come to visit you again. It’s getting late now.”
In this way she covered her husband’s abrupt departure, for Godfrey had gone straight to the door, unable to say more.
In this way, she explained her husband’s sudden departure, since Godfrey had gone right to the door, unable to say anything else.
CHAPTER XX.
Nancy and Godfrey walked home under the starlight in silence. When they entered the oaken parlour, Godfrey threw himself into his chair, while Nancy laid down her bonnet and shawl, and stood on the hearth near her husband, unwilling to leave him even for a few minutes, and yet fearing to utter any word lest it might jar on his feeling. At last Godfrey turned his head towards her, and their eyes met, dwelling in that meeting without any movement on either side. That quiet mutual gaze of a trusting husband and wife is like the first moment of rest or refuge from a great weariness or a great danger—not to be interfered with by speech or action which would distract the sensations from the fresh enjoyment of repose.
Nancy and Godfrey walked home quietly under the stars. When they entered the oak-paneled living room, Godfrey sank into his chair, while Nancy set down her bonnet and shawl, standing by the fireplace near her husband. She didn’t want to leave him, even for a moment, but was afraid to say anything that might upset him. Finally, Godfrey turned his head toward her, and their eyes locked, lingering in that moment without either of them moving. That peaceful exchange between a trusting husband and wife is like the first moment of relief after a long period of exhaustion or danger—not something to be disturbed by words or actions that would take away from the pure enjoyment of rest.
But presently he put out his hand, and as Nancy placed hers within it, he drew her towards him, and said—
But then he reached out his hand, and as Nancy placed hers in his, he pulled her closer and said—
“That’s ended!”
"That's over!"
She bent to kiss him, and then said, as she stood by his side, “Yes, I’m afraid we must give up the hope of having her for a daughter. It wouldn’t be right to want to force her to come to us against her will. We can’t alter her bringing up and what’s come of it.”
She leaned down to kiss him, and then said, standing next to him, “Yeah, I’m afraid we have to give up the hope of having her as our daughter. It wouldn’t be fair to try to force her to come to us against her will. We can’t change her upbringing and what it’s led to.”
“No,” said Godfrey, with a keen decisiveness of tone, in contrast with his usually careless and unemphatic speech—“there’s debts we can’t pay like money debts, by paying extra for the years that have slipped by. While I’ve been putting off and putting off, the trees have been growing—it’s too late now. Marner was in the right in what he said about a man’s turning away a blessing from his door: it falls to somebody else. I wanted to pass for childless once, Nancy—I shall pass for childless now against my wish.”
“No,” Godfrey said, his tone sharp and decisive, quite different from his usual casual way of speaking. “There are debts we can’t settle like money debts, by just paying extra for the years we’ve let go. While I’ve been procrastinating, the trees have been growing—it’s too late now. Marner was right when he talked about a person turning away a blessing from their doorstep: it ends up going to someone else. I wanted to appear childless before, Nancy—I’ll be seen as childless now, even though I don’t want that.”
Nancy did not speak immediately, but after a little while she asked—“You won’t make it known, then, about Eppie’s being your daughter?”
Nancy didn’t reply right away, but after a moment she asked, “So you won’t tell anyone that Eppie is your daughter?”
“No: where would be the good to anybody?—only harm. I must do what I can for her in the state of life she chooses. I must see who it is she’s thinking of marrying.”
“No: what good would it do anyone?—only harm. I have to do what I can for her in the life she chooses. I need to find out who she’s thinking about marrying.”
“If it won’t do any good to make the thing known,” said Nancy, who thought she might now allow herself the relief of entertaining a feeling which she had tried to silence before, “I should be very thankful for father and Priscilla never to be troubled with knowing what was done in the past, more than about Dunsey: it can’t be helped, their knowing that.”
“If it’s not going to help to bring this up,” said Nancy, who felt she could finally allow herself the relief of expressing a feeling she had tried to suppress before, “I would be really grateful if my father and Priscilla never had to worry about knowing what happened in the past, aside from what they know about Dunsey: there’s no changing that.”
“I shall put it in my will—I think I shall put it in my will. I shouldn’t like to leave anything to be found out, like this of Dunsey,” said Godfrey, meditatively. “But I can’t see anything but difficulties that ’ud come from telling it now. I must do what I can to make her happy in her own way. I’ve a notion,” he added, after a moment’s pause, “it’s Aaron Winthrop she meant she was engaged to. I remember seeing him with her and Marner going away from church.”
“I’m going to include it in my will—I think I will include it in my will. I wouldn’t want to leave anything for people to Discover, like this situation with Dunsey,” Godfrey said thoughtfully. “But I can only see problems that would come from revealing it now. I have to do what I can to make her happy in her own way. I have a feeling,” he added after a brief pause, “that it’s Aaron Winthrop she meant she was engaged to. I remember seeing him with her and Marner leaving church.”
“Well, he’s very sober and industrious,” said Nancy, trying to view the matter as cheerfully as possible.
“Well, he’s very serious and hardworking,” said Nancy, trying to look at the situation as positively as she could.
Godfrey fell into thoughtfulness again. Presently he looked up at Nancy sorrowfully, and said—
Godfrey fell deep in thought again. After a moment, he looked up at Nancy with sadness and said—
“She’s a very pretty, nice girl, isn’t she, Nancy?”
“She’s a really pretty, nice girl, don’t you think, Nancy?”
“Yes, dear; and with just your hair and eyes: I wondered it had never struck me before.”
“Yes, dear; and with just your hair and eyes: I’m surprised I never noticed it before.”
“I think she took a dislike to me at the thought of my being her father: I could see a change in her manner after that.”
“I think she started to dislike me when she realized I was her father. I noticed a change in how she acted after that.”
“She couldn’t bear to think of not looking on Marner as her father,” said Nancy, not wishing to confirm her husband’s painful impression.
“She couldn’t stand the thought of not seeing Marner as her dad,” said Nancy, not wanting to affirm her husband’s painful feeling.
“She thinks I did wrong by her mother as well as by her. She thinks me worse than I am. But she must think it: she can never know all. It’s part of my punishment, Nancy, for my daughter to dislike me. I should never have got into that trouble if I’d been true to you—if I hadn’t been a fool. I’d no right to expect anything but evil could come of that marriage—and when I shirked doing a father’s part too.”
“She thinks I wronged her mother and her. She sees me as worse than I really am. But she has to think that: she can never know everything. It’s part of my punishment, Nancy, that my daughter dislikes me. I never should have gotten into that mess if I had been honest with you—if I hadn’t acted foolishly. I had no right to expect anything good to come from that marriage—and I also neglected my duties as a father.”
Nancy was silent: her spirit of rectitude would not let her try to soften the edge of what she felt to be a just compunction. He spoke again after a little while, but the tone was rather changed: there was tenderness mingled with the previous self-reproach.
Nancy was quiet; her sense of integrity wouldn’t allow her to downplay what she felt was a rightful guilt. He spoke again after a moment, but his tone had shifted somewhat: there was a mix of tenderness with the earlier self-blame.
“And I got you, Nancy, in spite of all; and yet I’ve been grumbling and uneasy because I hadn’t something else—as if I deserved it.”
“And I’ve got you, Nancy, despite everything; and yet I’ve been complaining and restless because I didn’t have something more—as if I earned it.”
“You’ve never been wanting to me, Godfrey,” said Nancy, with quiet sincerity. “My only trouble would be gone if you resigned yourself to the lot that’s been given us.”
“You’ve never been wanting to me, Godfrey,” Nancy said sincerely. “My only issue would be resolved if you accepted the life that’s been given to us.”
“Well, perhaps it isn’t too late to mend a bit there. Though it is too late to mend some things, say what they will.”
“Well, maybe it’s not too late to fix a few things. Though for some things, it is definitely too late to make any changes, no matter what anyone says.”
CHAPTER XXI.
The next morning, when Silas and Eppie were seated at their breakfast, he said to her—
The next morning, when Silas and Eppie were sitting down for breakfast, he said to her—
“Eppie, there’s a thing I’ve had on my mind to do this two year, and now the money’s been brought back to us, we can do it. I’ve been turning it over and over in the night, and I think we’ll set out to-morrow, while the fine days last. We’ll leave the house and everything for your godmother to take care on, and we’ll make a little bundle o’ things and set out.”
“Eppie, there's something I've been meaning to do for the past two years, and now that the money has been returned to us, we can finally do it. I've been thinking about it every night, and I believe we should leave tomorrow while the weather is nice. We'll leave the house and everything for your godmother to take care of, and we'll pack a small bundle of things and set off.”
“Where to go, daddy?” said Eppie, in much surprise.
“Where are we going, Daddy?” Eppie said, clearly surprised.
“To my old country—to the town where I was born—up Lantern Yard. I want to see Mr. Paston, the minister: something may ha’ come out to make ’em know I was innicent o’ the robbery. And Mr. Paston was a man with a deal o’ light—I want to speak to him about the drawing o’ the lots. And I should like to talk to him about the religion o’ this country-side, for I partly think he doesn’t know on it.”
“To my old country—to the town where I was born—up Lantern Yard. I want to see Mr. Paston, the minister: something may have come out to prove I was innocent of the robbery. And Mr. Paston was a man with a lot of insight—I want to speak to him about the drawing of the lots. I’d also like to talk to him about the religion in this area, because I partly think he’s not familiar with it.”
Eppie was very joyful, for there was the prospect not only of wonder and delight at seeing a strange country, but also of coming back to tell Aaron all about it. Aaron was so much wiser than she was about most things—it would be rather pleasant to have this little advantage over him. Mrs. Winthrop, though possessed with a dim fear of dangers attendant on so long a journey, and requiring many assurances that it would not take them out of the region of carriers’ carts and slow waggons, was nevertheless well pleased that Silas should revisit his own country, and find out if he had been cleared from that false accusation.
Eppie was really happy because she had the chance not just to experience the excitement of visiting a new place, but also to come back and share everything with Aaron. He was so much smarter than she was about most things, so it would be nice to have this little edge over him. Mrs. Winthrop, despite having a vague fear of the dangers that could come with such a long trip and needing lots of reassurances that they wouldn’t be too far from carriers’ carts and slow wagons, was still pleased that Silas could return to his homeland and find out if he had been exonerated from that false accusation.
“You’d be easier in your mind for the rest o’ your life, Master Marner,” said Dolly—“that you would. And if there’s any light to be got up the yard as you talk on, we’ve need of it i’ this world, and I’d be glad on it myself, if you could bring it back.”
“You’d feel better for the rest of your life, Master Marner,” said Dolly. “That much is true. And if there’s any way to find some hope in this situation, as you say, we could really use it in this world, and I’d be happy about it too if you could bring it back.”
So on the fourth day from that time, Silas and Eppie, in their Sunday clothes, with a small bundle tied in a blue linen handkerchief, were making their way through the streets of a great manufacturing town. Silas, bewildered by the changes thirty years had brought over his native place, had stopped several persons in succession to ask them the name of this town, that he might be sure he was not under a mistake about it.
So on the fourth day after that, Silas and Eppie, dressed in their Sunday best, with a small bundle wrapped in a blue linen handkerchief, were walking through the streets of a big manufacturing town. Silas, confused by the changes that thirty years had made to his hometown, had stopped several people in a row to ask them the name of this town, so he could be sure he wasn’t mistaken about it.
“Ask for Lantern Yard, father—ask this gentleman with the tassels on his shoulders a-standing at the shop door; he isn’t in a hurry like the rest,” said Eppie, in some distress at her father’s bewilderment, and ill at ease, besides, amidst the noise, the movement, and the multitude of strange indifferent faces.
“Ask about Lantern Yard, Dad—ask this guy with the tassels on his shoulders standing at the shop door; he’s not in a rush like the others,” Eppie said, feeling worried about her father’s confusion and uncomfortable in the midst of the noise, the movement, and the crowd of unfamiliar, indifferent faces.
“Eh, my child, he won’t know anything about it,” said Silas; “gentlefolks didn’t ever go up the Yard. But happen somebody can tell me which is the way to Prison Street, where the jail is. I know the way out o’ that as if I’d seen it yesterday.”
“Eh, my child, he won’t know anything about it,” said Silas; “rich people never went up the Yard. But maybe someone can tell me how to get to Prison Street, where the jail is. I know the way out of there like I saw it yesterday.”
With some difficulty, after many turnings and new inquiries, they reached Prison Street; and the grim walls of the jail, the first object that answered to any image in Silas’s memory, cheered him with the certitude, which no assurance of the town’s name had hitherto given him, that he was in his native place.
With some effort, after many twists and new questions, they finally arrived at Prison Street. The imposing walls of the jail, the first thing that matched any memory in Silas’s mind, gave him the certainty—something no mention of the town’s name had provided until now—that he was back in his hometown.
“Ah,” he said, drawing a long breath, “there’s the jail, Eppie; that’s just the same: I aren’t afraid now. It’s the third turning on the left hand from the jail doors—that’s the way we must go.”
“Ah,” he said, taking a deep breath, “there’s the jail, Eppie; it’s exactly the same: I’m not afraid now. It’s the third turn on the left from the jail doors—that’s the way we need to go.”
“Oh, what a dark ugly place!” said Eppie. “How it hides the sky! It’s worse than the Workhouse. I’m glad you don’t live in this town now, father. Is Lantern Yard like this street?”
“Oh, what a dark, ugly place!” said Eppie. “It really hides the sky! It’s worse than the Workhouse. I’m glad you don’t live in this town anymore, Dad. Is Lantern Yard like this street?”
“My precious child,” said Silas, smiling, “it isn’t a big street like this. I never was easy i’ this street myself, but I was fond o’ Lantern Yard. The shops here are all altered, I think—I can’t make ’em out; but I shall know the turning, because it’s the third.”
“My precious child,” said Silas, smiling, “it’s not a big street like this. I never felt comfortable on this street myself, but I loved Lantern Yard. I think all the shops here have changed—I can’t figure them out; but I’ll recognize the turning because it’s the third one.”
“Here it is,” he said, in a tone of satisfaction, as they came to a narrow alley. “And then we must go to the left again, and then straight for’ard for a bit, up Shoe Lane: and then we shall be at the entry next to the o’erhanging window, where there’s the nick in the road for the water to run. Eh, I can see it all.”
“Here it is,” he said, sounding pleased, as they arrived at a narrow alley. “Then we need to go left again, and straight for a little while up Shoe Lane: after that, we’ll reach the entrance next to the overhanging window, where there’s a dip in the road for the water to flow. Yeah, I can picture it all.”
“O father, I’m like as if I was stifled,” said Eppie. “I couldn’t ha’ thought as any folks lived i’ this way, so close together. How pretty the Stone-pits ’ull look when we get back!”
“O father, I feel like I'm suffocating,” said Eppie. “I never thought there were people living this way, so close together. How beautiful the Stone-pits will look when we get back!”
“It looks comical to me, child, now—and smells bad. I can’t think as it usened to smell so.”
“It looks funny to me, kid, now—and it smells awful. I can’t think of it the way it used to smell.”
Here and there a sallow, begrimed face looked out from a gloomy doorway at the strangers, and increased Eppie’s uneasiness, so that it was a longed-for relief when they issued from the alleys into Shoe Lane, where there was a broader strip of sky.
Here and there, a pale, dirty face peered out from a dark doorway at the strangers, which heightened Eppie's unease. It was a huge relief when they finally emerged from the alleys into Shoe Lane, where there was a wider stretch of sky.
“Dear heart!” said Silas, “why, there’s people coming out o’ the Yard as if they’d been to chapel at this time o’ day—a weekday noon!”
“Dear heart!” said Silas, “look at all those people coming out of the yard as if they had just been to church at this time of day—a weekday noon!”
Suddenly he started and stood still with a look of distressed amazement, that alarmed Eppie. They were before an opening in front of a large factory, from which men and women were streaming for their midday meal.
Suddenly, he froze with a look of shocked disbelief that worried Eppie. They were in front of an entrance to a large factory, where men and women were pouring out for their lunch break.
“Father,” said Eppie, clasping his arm, “what’s the matter?”
“Father,” Eppie said, holding onto his arm, “what’s wrong?”
But she had to speak again and again before Silas could answer her.
But she had to keep talking over and over before Silas could reply to her.
“It’s gone, child,” he said, at last, in strong agitation—“Lantern Yard’s gone. It must ha’ been here, because here’s the house with the o’erhanging window—I know that—it’s just the same; but they’ve made this new opening; and see that big factory! It’s all gone—chapel and all.”
“It’s gone, kid,” he finally said, clearly upset. “Lantern Yard’s gone. It must have been here, because here’s the house with the overhanging window—I know that—it looks just the same; but they made this new opening; and look at that big factory! It’s all gone—chapel and everything.”
“Come into that little brush-shop and sit down, father—they’ll let you sit down,” said Eppie, always on the watch lest one of her father’s strange attacks should come on. “Perhaps the people can tell you all about it.”
“Come into that little brush shop and sit down, Dad—they’ll let you,” said Eppie, always keeping an eye out for one of her father’s unusual episodes. “Maybe the people can fill you in on everything.”
But neither from the brush-maker, who had come to Shoe Lane only ten years ago, when the factory was already built, nor from any other source within his reach, could Silas learn anything of the old Lantern Yard friends, or of Mr. Paston the minister.
But neither from the brush-maker, who had come to Shoe Lane only ten years ago, when the factory was already built, nor from any other source within his reach, could Silas learn anything about his old Lantern Yard friends or about Mr. Paston the minister.
“The old place is all swep’ away,” Silas said to Dolly Winthrop on the night of his return—“the little graveyard and everything. The old home’s gone; I’ve no home but this now. I shall never know whether they got at the truth o’ the robbery, nor whether Mr. Paston could ha’ given me any light about the drawing o’ the lots. It’s dark to me, Mrs. Winthrop, that is; I doubt it’ll be dark to the last.”
“The old place is all gone,” Silas said to Dolly Winthrop on the night of his return—“the little graveyard and everything. The old home’s gone; I have no home but this one now. I’ll never know whether they figured out the truth about the robbery or whether Mr. Paston could have given me any insight about the draw of the lots. It’s dark to me, Mrs. Winthrop; I doubt it’ll ever be clear.”
“Well, yes, Master Marner,” said Dolly, who sat with a placid listening face, now bordered by grey hairs; “I doubt it may. It’s the will o’ Them above as a many things should be dark to us; but there’s some things as I’ve never felt i’ the dark about, and they’re mostly what comes i’ the day’s work. You were hard done by that once, Master Marner, and it seems as you’ll never know the rights of it; but that doesn’t hinder there being a rights, Master Marner, for all it’s dark to you and me.”
"Well, yes, Master Marner," said Dolly, who sat with a calm listening expression, now framed by gray hair. "I think it might. It's the will of Those above that many things should remain unclear to us; but there are some things I've never felt in the dark about, and they're mostly what comes from the day's work. You were treated unfairly once, Master Marner, and it seems you'll never know the full story; but that doesn't change the fact that there is a truth, Master Marner, even if it's unclear to you and me."
“No,” said Silas, “no; that doesn’t hinder. Since the time the child was sent to me and I’ve come to love her as myself, I’ve had light enough to trusten by; and now she says she’ll never leave me, I think I shall trusten till I die.”
“No,” said Silas, “no; that doesn’t hold me back. Ever since the child was sent to me and I’ve come to love her like I love myself, I’ve had enough light to guide me; and now that she says she’ll never leave me, I believe I’ll trust until I die.”
CONCLUSION
There was one time of the year which was held in Raveloe to be especially suitable for a wedding. It was when the great lilacs and laburnums in the old-fashioned gardens showed their golden and purple wealth above the lichen-tinted walls, and when there were calves still young enough to want bucketfuls of fragrant milk. People were not so busy then as they must become when the full cheese-making and the mowing had set in; and besides, it was a time when a light bridal dress could be worn with comfort and seen to advantage.
There was one time of year that everyone in Raveloe thought was perfect for a wedding. It was when the big lilacs and laburnums in the old gardens displayed their golden and purple blooms over the lichen-covered walls, and when there were still young calves that needed bucketfuls of sweet milk. People weren’t as busy then as they would be once the cheese-making and mowing season started; plus, it was a time when you could comfortably wear a light bridal dress that looked great.
Happily the sunshine fell more warmly than usual on the lilac tufts the morning that Eppie was married, for her dress was a very light one. She had often thought, though with a feeling of renunciation, that the perfection of a wedding-dress would be a white cotton, with the tiniest pink sprig at wide intervals; so that when Mrs. Godfrey Cass begged to provide one, and asked Eppie to choose what it should be, previous meditation had enabled her to give a decided answer at once.
Happily, the sun shone more warmly than usual on the lilac blooms the morning Eppie got married, because her dress was very light. She had often thought, though with a sense of giving up, that the perfect wedding dress would be white cotton with tiny pink flowers spaced out nicely; so when Mrs. Godfrey Cass offered to provide one and asked Eppie to choose, her prior reflections allowed her to give a clear answer right away.
Seen at a little distance as she walked across the churchyard and down the village, she seemed to be attired in pure white, and her hair looked like the dash of gold on a lily. One hand was on her husband’s arm, and with the other she clasped the hand of her father Silas.
Seen from a short distance as she walked through the churchyard and down the village, she appeared to be dressed in pure white, and her hair looked like a touch of gold on a lily. One hand was on her husband's arm, and with the other she held the hand of her father, Silas.
“You won’t be giving me away, father,” she had said before they went to church; “you’ll only be taking Aaron to be a son to you.”
“You won’t be giving me away, Dad,” she had said before they went to church; “you’ll just be taking Aaron to be a son to you.”
Dolly Winthrop walked behind with her husband; and there ended the little bridal procession.
Dolly Winthrop walked behind her husband, and that was the end of the small wedding procession.
There were many eyes to look at it, and Miss Priscilla Lammeter was glad that she and her father had happened to drive up to the door of the Red House just in time to see this pretty sight. They had come to keep Nancy company to-day, because Mr. Cass had had to go away to Lytherley, for special reasons. That seemed to be a pity, for otherwise he might have gone, as Mr. Crackenthorp and Mr. Osgood certainly would, to look on at the wedding-feast which he had ordered at the Rainbow, naturally feeling a great interest in the weaver who had been wronged by one of his own family.
There were a lot of people watching, and Miss Priscilla Lammeter was happy that she and her father had just arrived at the Red House in time to see this lovely scene. They had come to keep Nancy company today because Mr. Cass had to go away to Lytherley for specific reasons. That felt unfortunate, because otherwise he might have gone, like Mr. Crackenthorp and Mr. Osgood definitely would, to check out the wedding feast he had arranged at the Rainbow, naturally feeling a keen interest in the weaver who had been wronged by his own family.
“I could ha’ wished Nancy had had the luck to find a child like that and bring her up,” said Priscilla to her father, as they sat in the gig; “I should ha’ had something young to think of then, besides the lambs and the calves.”
“I wish Nancy had been lucky enough to find a kid like that and raise her,” Priscilla said to her father as they sat in the carriage; “then I would have had something young to focus on besides the lambs and the calves.”
“Yes, my dear, yes,” said Mr. Lammeter; “one feels that as one gets older. Things look dim to old folks: they’d need have some young eyes about ’em, to let ’em know the world’s the same as it used to be.”
“Yes, my dear, yes,” said Mr. Lammeter; “you feel that as you get older. Everything seems blurry to older people: they need some young eyes around to remind them that the world is still the same as it used to be.”
Nancy came out now to welcome her father and sister; and the wedding group had passed on beyond the Red House to the humbler part of the village.
Nancy stepped out now to greet her father and sister; and the wedding group had moved on past the Red House to the less affluent section of the village.
Dolly Winthrop was the first to divine that old Mr. Macey, who had been set in his arm-chair outside his own door, would expect some special notice as they passed, since he was too old to be at the wedding-feast.
Dolly Winthrop was the first to realize that old Mr. Macey, who had settled into his armchair outside his front door, would be looking for some special acknowledgment as they went by, since he was too old to attend the wedding feast.
“Mr. Macey’s looking for a word from us,” said Dolly; “he’ll be hurt if we pass him and say nothing—and him so racked with rheumatiz.”
“Mr. Macey’s waiting for us to say something,” said Dolly; “he’ll be upset if we ignore him and say nothing—and he’s suffering so much with rheumatism.”
So they turned aside to shake hands with the old man. He had looked forward to the occasion, and had his premeditated speech.
So they stopped to shake hands with the old man. He had been looking forward to this moment and had his planned speech ready.
“Well, Master Marner,” he said, in a voice that quavered a good deal, “I’ve lived to see my words come true. I was the first to say there was no harm in you, though your looks might be again’ you; and I was the first to say you’d get your money back. And it’s nothing but rightful as you should. And I’d ha’ said the ‘Amens,’ and willing, at the holy matrimony; but Tookey’s done it a good while now, and I hope you’ll have none the worse luck.”
“Well, Master Marner,” he said, his voice trembling quite a bit, “I’ve lived to see my words come true. I was the first to say there was no harm in you, even though your appearance might suggest otherwise; and I was the first to say you’d get your money back. And it’s only fair that you should. I would have said the ‘Amens’ gladly at the wedding, but Tookey’s done that for quite a while now, and I hope you won’t have any bad luck because of it.”
In the open yard before the Rainbow the party of guests were already assembled, though it was still nearly an hour before the appointed feast time. But by this means they could not only enjoy the slow advent of their pleasure; they had also ample leisure to talk of Silas Marner’s strange history, and arrive by due degrees at the conclusion that he had brought a blessing on himself by acting like a father to a lone motherless child. Even the farrier did not negative this sentiment: on the contrary, he took it up as peculiarly his own, and invited any hardy person present to contradict him. But he met with no contradiction; and all differences among the company were merged in a general agreement with Mr. Snell’s sentiment, that when a man had deserved his good luck, it was the part of his neighbours to wish him joy.
In the open yard in front of the Rainbow, the group of guests had already gathered, even though it was still almost an hour before the scheduled feast. This way, they could not only enjoy the slow build-up to their fun but also have plenty of time to discuss Silas Marner’s unusual story and gradually conclude that he had brought a blessing upon himself by acting as a father to a lonely, motherless child. Even the farrier didn’t disagree with this sentiment; in fact, he took it up as particularly his own and challenged anyone present to contradict him. But he faced no disagreement, and all the differences among the group faded into a shared agreement with Mr. Snell's belief that when someone deserved their good fortune, it was the duty of their neighbors to celebrate with them.
As the bridal group approached, a hearty cheer was raised in the Rainbow yard; and Ben Winthrop, whose jokes had retained their acceptable flavour, found it agreeable to turn in there and receive congratulations; not requiring the proposed interval of quiet at the Stone-pits before joining the company.
As the bridal party came closer, a loud cheer erupted in the Rainbow yard; and Ben Winthrop, whose jokes still had their charm, happily decided to join them and accept congratulations, not needing the suggested quiet time at the Stone-pits before mingling with the crowd.
Eppie had a larger garden than she had ever expected there now; and in other ways there had been alterations at the expense of Mr. Cass, the landlord, to suit Silas’s larger family. For he and Eppie had declared that they would rather stay at the Stone-pits than go to any new home. The garden was fenced with stones on two sides, but in front there was an open fence, through which the flowers shone with answering gladness, as the four united people came within sight of them.
Eppie had a bigger garden than she ever expected to have there now; and in other ways, there had been changes made at Mr. Cass’s expense, the landlord, to accommodate Silas’s larger family. He and Eppie had decided that they would rather stay at the Stone-pits than move to any new home. The garden was surrounded by stone fences on two sides, but in front, there was an open fence, through which the flowers shone brightly in response as the four of them came into view.
“O father,” said Eppie, “what a pretty home ours is! I think nobody could be happier than we are.”
“O Dad,” said Eppie, “what a beautiful home we have! I don’t think anyone could be happier than we are.”
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