This is a modern-English version of Life's Handicap: Being Stories of Mine Own People, originally written by Kipling, Rudyard. It has been thoroughly updated, including changes to sentence structure, words, spelling, and grammar—to ensure clarity for contemporary readers, while preserving the original spirit and nuance. If you click on a paragraph, you will see the original text that we modified, and you can toggle between the two versions.

Scroll to the bottom of this page and you will find a free ePUB download link for this book.









LIFE’S HANDICAP

BEING STORIES OF MINE OWN PEOPLE



By Rudyard Kipling



1915

TO
E.K.R.
FROM
R.K.
1887-89
C.M.G.










CONTENTS

TABLE OF CONTENTS










PREFACE

In Northern India stood a monastery called The Chubara of Dhunni Bhagat. No one remembered who or what Dhunni Bhagat had been. He had lived his life, made a little money and spent it all, as every good Hindu should do, on a work of piety—the Chubara. That was full of brick cells, gaily painted with the figures of Gods and kings and elephants, where worn-out priests could sit and meditate on the latter end of things; the paths were brick paved, and the naked feet of thousands had worn them into gutters. Clumps of mangoes sprouted from between the bricks; great pipal trees overhung the well-windlass that whined all day; and hosts of parrots tore through the trees. Crows and squirrels were tame in that place, for they knew that never a priest would touch them.

In Northern India, there was a monastery called The Chubara of Dhunni Bhagat. No one could recall who or what Dhunni Bhagat was. He had lived his life, earned a bit of money, and spent it all, just like every good Hindu was supposed to, on a charitable cause—the Chubara. It was filled with brick cells, brightly painted with images of gods, kings, and elephants, where tired priests could sit and reflect on the meaning of life; the paths were paved with bricks, and the bare feet of thousands had worn them down into ditches. Mango trees grew up through the cracks in the bricks; large pipal trees shaded the well-windlass that creaked all day; and flocks of parrots flew through the branches. Crows and squirrels were comfortable in that place, knowing that no priest would ever bother them.

The wandering mendicants, charm-sellers, and holy vagabonds for a hundred miles round used to make the Chubara their place of call and rest. Mahomedan, Sikh, and Hindu mixed equally under the trees. They were old men, and when man has come to the turnstiles of Night all the creeds in the world seem to him wonderfully alike and colourless.

The traveling beggars, charm sellers, and spiritual drifters from a hundred miles away would often stop at the Chubara to rest. Muslims, Sikhs, and Hindus gathered together under the trees. They were old men, and when a man reaches the end of his days, all the beliefs in the world seem to blend together and lose their vibrancy.

Gobind the one-eyed told me this. He was a holy man who lived on an island in the middle of a river and fed the fishes with little bread pellets twice a day. In flood-time, when swollen corpses stranded themselves at the foot of the island, Gobind would cause them to be piously burned, for the sake of the honour of mankind, and having regard to his own account with God hereafter. But when two-thirds of the island was torn away in a spate, Gobind came across the river to Dhunni Bhagat’s Chubara, he and his brass drinking vessel with the well-cord round the neck, his short arm-rest crutch studded with brass nails, his roll of bedding, his big pipe, his umbrella, and his tall sugar-loaf hat with the nodding peacock feathers in it. He wrapped himself up in his patched quilt made of every colour and material in the world, sat down in a sunny corner of the very quiet Chubara, and, resting his arm on his short-handled crutch, waited for death. The people brought him food and little clumps of marigold flowers, and he gave his blessing in return. He was nearly blind, and his face was seamed and lined and wrinkled beyond belief, for he had lived in his time which was before the English came within five hundred miles of Dhunni Bhagat’s Chubara.

Gobind the one-eyed told me this. He was a holy man who lived on an island in the middle of a river and fed the fish with small bread pellets twice a day. During floods, when swollen bodies washed up at the foot of the island, Gobind would have them respectfully burned, honoring humanity and keeping his own account with God in mind for the future. But when two-thirds of the island got washed away in a flood, Gobind crossed the river to Dhunni Bhagat’s Chubara, bringing with him his brass drinking vessel with a sturdy cord around the neck, his short crutch studded with brass nails, his bedding roll, his large pipe, his umbrella, and his tall sugar-loaf hat adorned with nodding peacock feathers. He wrapped himself in his patched quilt made from every color and type of material imaginable, settled into a sunny corner of the very quiet Chubara, and, resting his arm on his crutch, waited for death. People brought him food and small bundles of marigold flowers, and in exchange, he gave his blessings. He was nearly blind, and his face was so wrinkled and lined that it was hard to believe, as he had lived in a time long before the English came within five hundred miles of Dhunni Bhagat’s Chubara.

When we grew to know each other well, Gobind would tell me tales in a voice most like the rumbling of heavy guns over a wooden bridge. His tales were true, but not one in twenty could be printed in an English book, because the English do not think as natives do. They brood over matters that a native would dismiss till a fitting occasion; and what they would not think twice about a native will brood over till a fitting occasion: then native and English stare at each other hopelessly across great gulfs of miscomprehension.

When we got to know each other well, Gobind would share stories in a voice that sounded like the rumbling of heavy artillery rolling over a wooden bridge. His stories were true, but only one out of twenty could be published in an English book because the English don’t think like natives do. They dwell on issues that a native would set aside until the right moment; and what they wouldn't give a second thought to, a native would ponder over until the right time comes. Then, both native and English look at each other in confusion across huge gaps of misunderstanding.

‘And what,’ said Gobind one Sunday evening, ‘is your honoured craft, and by what manner of means earn you your daily bread?’

‘And what,’ said Gobind one Sunday evening, ‘is your esteemed trade, and how do you earn your living?’

‘I am,’ said I, ‘a kerani—one who writes with a pen upon paper, not being in the service of the Government.’

‘I am,’ I said, ‘a clerk—someone who writes with a pen on paper, not working for the Government.’

‘Then what do you write?’ said Gobind. ‘Come nearer, for I cannot see your countenance, and the light fails.’

‘Then what do you write?’ Gobind asked. ‘Come closer, because I can’t see your face, and the light is fading.’

‘I write of all matters that lie within my understanding, and of many that do not. But chiefly I write of Life and Death, and men and women, and Love and Fate according to the measure of my ability, telling the tale through the mouths of one, two, or more people. Then by the favour of God the tales are sold and money accrues to me that I may keep alive.’

‘I write about everything I understand and many things I don't. But mainly, I write about Life and Death, people, Love, and Fate as best as I can, sharing the story through the words of one, two, or more characters. Then, with God's blessing, the stories sell, and I earn money to stay alive.’

‘Even so,’ said Gobind. ‘That is the work of the bazar story-teller; but he speaks straight to men and women and does not write anything at all. Only when the tale has aroused expectation, and calamities are about to befall the virtuous, he stops suddenly and demands payment ere he continues the narration. Is it so in your craft, my son?’

‘Even so,’ said Gobind. ‘That’s the job of the market storyteller; he talks directly to people and doesn’t write anything down. Only when the story has built up excitement and disasters are about to hit the good doers, he suddenly stops and asks for payment before he continues the tale. Is it the same in your craft, my son?’

‘I have heard of such things when a tale is of great length, and is sold as a cucumber, in small pieces.’

‘I’ve heard of things like that when a story is really long and is sold like a cucumber, in small chunks.’

‘Ay, I was once a famed teller of stories when I was begging on the road between Koshin and Etra; before the last pilgrimage that ever I took to Orissa. I told many tales and heard many more at the rest-houses in the evening when we were merry at the end of the march. It is in my heart that grown men are but as little children in the matter of tales, and the oldest tale is the most beloved.’

‘Yes, I used to be a well-known storyteller when I was out begging along the road between Koshin and Etra, before my last pilgrimage to Orissa. I shared many stories and heard plenty more at the inns in the evenings when we were cheerful after a day’s journey. I believe that grown men are really just like little kids when it comes to stories, and the oldest tales are the ones they love the most.’

‘With your people that is truth,’ said I. ‘But in regard to our people they desire new tales, and when all is written they rise up and declare that the tale were better told in such and such a manner, and doubt either the truth or the invention thereof.’

‘With your people, that is true,’ I said. ‘But for our people, they want new stories, and when everything is written down, they stand up and say that the story would be better told in this way or that, and they question either the truth or the creativity behind it.’

‘But what folly is theirs!’ said Gobind, throwing out his knotted hand. ‘A tale that is told is a true tale as long as the telling lasts. And of their talk upon it—you know how Bilas Khan, that was the prince of tale-tellers, said to one who mocked him in the great rest-house on the Jhelum road: “Go on, my brother, and finish that I have begun,” and he who mocked took up the tale, but having neither voice nor manner for the task came to a standstill, and the pilgrims at supper made him eat abuse and stick half that night.’

‘But how foolish they are!’ said Gobind, throwing out his knotted hand. ‘A story that’s told is a true story as long as it’s being told. And about their discussion on it—you know how Bilas Khan, the best storyteller, said to someone who mocked him in the big rest-house on the Jhelum road: “Go ahead, my brother, and finish what I’ve started,” and the mocker picked up the story, but not having the voice or style for it, he got stuck, and the pilgrims at supper made him take a lot of insults and endure it for half the night.’

‘Nay, but with our people, money having passed, it is their right; as we should turn against a shoeseller in regard to shoes if those wore out. If ever I make a book you shall see and judge.’

‘No, but with our people, once money has exchanged hands, it's their right; just like we would hold a shoemaker accountable if their shoes wore out. If I ever write a book, you can see it and judge for yourself.’

‘And the parrot said to the falling tree, Wait, brother, till I fetch a prop!’ said Gobind with a grim chuckle. ‘God has given me eighty years, and it may be some over. I cannot look for more than day granted by day and as a favour at this tide. Be swift.’

‘And the parrot said to the falling tree, Wait, brother, till I get a prop!’ said Gobind with a grim chuckle. ‘God has given me eighty years, and it might be a bit more. I can’t expect more than one day at a time, and that’s a favor right now. Be quick.’

‘In what manner is it best to set about the task.’ said I, ‘O chiefest of those who string pearls with their tongue?’

‘What’s the best way to approach this task?’ I asked, ‘Oh, greatest of those who string pearls with their words?’

‘How do I know? Yet’—he thought for a little—‘how should I not know? God has made very many heads, but there is only one heart in all the world among your people or my people. They are children in the matter of tales.’

‘How do I know? Yet’—he thought for a moment—‘how could I not know? God has created many minds, but there is only one heart in the entire world among your people or my people. They are naive when it comes to stories.’

‘But none are so terrible as the little ones, if a man misplace a word, or in a second telling vary events by so much as one small devil.’

‘But none are as terrible as the little ones; if a person misplaces a word or, in a second telling, slightly alters the events by even one tiny detail.’

‘Ay, I also have told tales to the little ones, but do thou this—’ His old eyes fell on the gaudy paintings of the wall, the blue and red dome, and the flames of the poinsettias beyond. ‘Tell them first of those things that thou hast seen and they have seen together. Thus their knowledge will piece out thy imperfections. Tell them of what thou alone hast seen, then what thou hast heard, and since they be children tell them of battles and kings, horses, devils, elephants, and angels, but omit not to tell them of love and suchlike. All the earth is full of tales to him who listens and does not drive away the poor from his door. The poor are the best of tale-tellers; for they must lay their ear to the ground every night.’

'Yes, I’ve shared stories with the little ones too, but here’s what I want you to do—' His aged eyes lingered on the vibrant paintings on the wall, the blue and red dome, and the bright poinsettias outside. 'First, tell them about the things you’ve seen and what they’ve experienced too. That way, they can fill in the gaps in your stories. Share what you've witnessed alone, then what you've heard. And since they’re children, tell them about battles and kings, horses, demons, elephants, and angels, but don't forget to talk about love and similar things. The world is full of stories for those who listen and who don’t turn away the less fortunate. The poor are the best storytellers; they have to put their ears to the ground every night.'

After this conversation the idea grew in my head, and Gobind was pressing in his inquiries as to the health of the book.

After this conversation, the idea started to take shape in my mind, and Gobind kept asking about how the book was doing.

Later, when we had been parted for months, it happened that I was to go away and far off, and I came to bid Gobind good-bye.

Later, after we had been apart for months, I was getting ready to leave for a long time, and I went to say goodbye to Gobind.

‘It is farewell between us now, for I go a very long journey,’ I said.

‘It’s goodbye between us now, because I’m going on a long journey,’ I said.

‘And I also. A longer one than thou. But what of the book?’ said he.

‘And I too. A longer one than you. But what about the book?’ he said.

‘It will be born in due season if it is so ordained.’

‘It will be born at the right time if that’s how it’s meant to be.’

‘I would I could see it,’ said the old man, huddling beneath his quilt. ‘But that will not be. I die three days hence, in the night, a little before the dawn. The term of my years is accomplished.’

‘I wish I could see it,’ said the old man, huddling under his quilt. ‘But that won't happen. I will die three days from now, during the night, a little before dawn. My time is up.’

In nine cases out of ten a native makes no miscalculation as to the day of his death. He has the foreknowledge of the beasts in this respect.

In nine out of ten cases, a native knows exactly when he will die. He has the same instinct as the animals in this regard.

‘Then thou wilt depart in peace, and it is good talk, for thou hast said that life is no delight to thee.’

'Then you will leave in peace, and that's a good conversation, because you have said that life brings you no joy.'

‘But it is a pity that our book is not born. How shall I know that there is any record of my name?’

‘But it’s a shame that our book isn’t out yet. How will I know if there’s any record of my name?’

‘Because I promise, in the forepart of the book, preceding everything else, that it shall be written, Gobind, sadhu, of the island in the river and awaiting God in Dhunni Bhagat’s Chubara, first spoke of the book,’ said I.

‘Because I promise, at the beginning of the book, before anything else, that it will be written, Gobind, the holy man, of the island in the river and waiting for God in Dhunni Bhagat’s Chubara, first talked about the book,’ I said.

‘And gave counsel—an old man’s counsel. Gobind, son of Gobind of the Chumi village in the Karaon tehsil, in the district of Mooltan. Will that be written also?’

‘And gave advice—an old man’s advice. Gobind, son of Gobind from the Chumi village in the Karaon tehsil, in the district of Mooltan. Will that be recorded too?’

‘That will be written also.’

'That will be noted too.'

‘And the book will go across the Black Water to the houses of your people, and all the Sahibs will know of me who am eighty years old?’

‘And the book will be taken across the Black Water to your people's homes, and everyone will know about me, even though I'm eighty years old?’

‘All who read the book shall know. I cannot promise for the rest.’

‘Everyone who reads the book will know. I can’t make any promises for the rest.’

‘That is good talk. Call aloud to all who are in the monastery, and I will tell them this thing.’

‘That's great talk. Call out to everyone in the monastery, and I’ll tell them this.’

They trooped up, faquirs, sadhus, sunnyasis, byragis, nihangs, and mullahs, priests of all faiths and every degree of raggedness, and Gobind, leaning upon his crutch, spoke so that they were visibly filled with envy, and a white-haired senior bade Gobind think of his latter end instead of transitory repute in the mouths of strangers. Then Gobind gave me his blessing and I came away.

They gathered together—holy men, monks, ascetics, beggars, warriors, and priests from all religions and all levels of raggedness—and Gobind, leaning on his crutch, spoke in a way that obviously made them envious. A white-haired elder advised Gobind to consider his future rather than seek temporary fame among strangers. Then Gobind gave me his blessing and I walked away.

These tales have been collected from all places, and all sorts of people, from priests in the Chubara, from Ala Yar the carver, Jiwun Singh the carpenter, nameless men on steamers and trains round the world, women spinning outside their cottages in the twilight, officers and gentlemen now dead and buried, and a few, but these are the very best, my father gave me. The greater part of them have been published in magazines and newspapers, to whose editors I am indebted; but some are new on this side of the water, and some have not seen the light before.

These stories have been gathered from everywhere and all kinds of people—priests in the Chubara, Ala Yar the carver, Jiwun Singh the carpenter, unknown individuals on steamers and trains around the globe, women spinning outside their cottages at twilight, officers and gentlemen who are now gone, and a few of the very best ones that my father gave me. Most of them have been published in magazines and newspapers, for which I owe thanks to their editors; however, some are newly shared here, and some have never been published before.

The most remarkable stories are, of course, those which do not appear—for obvious reasons.

The most remarkable stories are, of course, the ones that never see the light of day— for obvious reasons.










THE LANG MEN O’ LARUT

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & CO.]

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & CO.]

The Chief Engineer’s sleeping suit was of yellow striped with blue, and his speech was the speech of Aberdeen. They sluiced the deck under him, and he hopped on to the ornamental capstan, a black pipe between his teeth, though the hour was not seven of the morn.

The Chief Engineer’s pajamas were yellow with blue stripes, and he spoke with an Aberdeen accent. They washed the deck beneath him, and he jumped onto the decorative capstan, a black pipe between his teeth, even though it wasn’t yet seven in the morning.

‘Did you ever hear o’ the Lang Men o’ Larut?’ he asked when the Man from Orizava had finished a story of an aboriginal giant discovered in the wilds of Brazil. There was never story yet passed the lips of teller, but the Man from Orizava could cap it.

‘Have you ever heard of the Lang Men of Larut?’ he asked when the Man from Orizava had finished telling a story about an aboriginal giant found in the wilds of Brazil. There has never been a story told that the Man from Orizava couldn’t top.

‘No, we never did,’ we responded with one voice. The Man from Orizava watched the Chief keenly, as a possible rival.

‘No, we never did,’ we replied in unison. The Man from Orizava watched the Chief closely, seeing him as a potential rival.

‘I’m not telling the story for the sake of talking merely,’ said the Chief, ‘but as a warning against betting, unless you bet on a perrfect certainty. The Lang Men o’ Larut were just a certainty. I have had talk wi’ them. Now Larut, you will understand, is a dependency, or it may be an outlying possession, o’ the island o’ Penang, and there they will get you tin and manganese, an’ it mayhap mica, and all manner o’ meenerals. Larut is a great place.’

‘I’m not sharing this story just to fill the silence,’ the Chief said, ‘but as a caution against gambling, unless you’re sure you’ll win. The Lang Men o’ Larut were a sure thing. I’ve talked to them. Now, Larut, you should know, is a territory, or it might be a distant part, of the island of Penang, and there you can find tin, manganese, maybe mica, and all sorts of minerals. Larut is an impressive place.’

‘But what about the population?’ said the Man from Orizava.

‘But what about the population?’ asked the Man from Orizava.

‘The population,’ said the Chief slowly, ‘were few but enorrmous. You must understand that, exceptin’ the tin-mines, there is no special inducement to Europeans to reside in Larut. The climate is warm and remarkably like the climate o’ Calcutta; and in regard to Calcutta, it cannot have escaped your obsairvation that—’

‘The population,’ said the Chief slowly, ‘was small but enormous. You need to understand that, aside from the tin mines, there’s no real reason for Europeans to live in Larut. The climate is warm and very similar to the climate of Calcutta; and concerning Calcutta, you must have noticed that—’

‘Calcutta isn’t Larut; and we’ve only just come from it,’ protested the Man from Orizava. ‘There’s a meteorological department in Calcutta, too.’

‘Calcutta isn’t Larut; and we just came from there,’ protested the Man from Orizava. ‘There’s a weather department in Calcutta, too.’

‘Ay, but there’s no meteorological department in Larut. Each man is a law to himself. Some drink whisky, and some drink brandipanee, and some drink cocktails—vara bad for the coats o’ the stomach is a cocktail—and some drink sangaree, so I have been credibly informed; but one and all they sweat like the packing of piston-head on a fourrteen-days’ voyage with the screw racing half her time. But, as I was saying, the population o’ Larut was five all told of English—that is to say, Scotch—an’ I’m Scotch, ye know,’ said the Chief.

‘Yeah, but there’s no weather service in Larut. Each person makes their own rules. Some drink whiskey, some drink brandy, some drink cocktails—really bad for your stomach is a cocktail—and some drink sangaree, or so I’ve been told; but all of them sweat like the packing of a piston head on a fourteen-day journey with the engine running most of the time. But, as I was saying, the total population of Larut was just five English people—that is to say, Scottish—and I’m Scottish, you know,’ said the Chief.

The Man from Orizava lit another cigarette, and waited patiently. It was hopeless to hurry the Chief Engineer.

The man from Orizava lit up another cigarette and waited calmly. There was no use in rushing the Chief Engineer.

‘I am not pretending to account for the population o’ Larut being laid down according to such fabulous dimensions. O’ the five white men engaged upon the extraction o’ tin ore and mercantile pursuits, there were three o’ the sons o’ Anak. Wait while I remember. Lammitter was the first by two inches—a giant in the land, an’ a terreefic man to cross in his ways. From heel to head he was six feet nine inches, and proportionately built across and through the thickness of his body. Six good feet nine inches—an overbearin’ man. Next to him, and I have forgotten his precise business, was Sandy Vowle. And he was six feet seven, but lean and lathy, and it was more in the elasteecity of his neck that the height lay than in any honesty o’ bone and sinew. Five feet and a few odd inches may have been his real height. The remainder came out when he held up his head, and six feet seven he was upon the door-sills. I took his measure in chalk standin’ on a chair. And next to him, but a proportionately made man, ruddy and of a fair countenance, was Jock Coan—that they called the Fir Cone. He was but six feet five, and a child beside Lammitter and Vowle. When the three walked out together, they made a scunner run through the colony o’ Larut. The Malays ran round them as though they had been the giant trees in the Yosemite Valley—these three Lang Men o’ Larut. It was perfectly ridiculous—a lusus naturae—that one little place should have contained maybe the three tallest ordinar’ men upon the face o’ the earth.

'I’m not trying to explain why the population of Larut is described in such exaggerated terms. Among the five white men involved in tin mining and trade, three were giants. Hold on while I remember. Lammitter was the tallest by two inches—a giant in the area and a really tough guy to deal with. From heel to head, he stood six feet nine inches tall, and he was built proportionately strong all over. Just six feet nine—a dominating presence. Next to him, though I can’t recall his exact role, was Sandy Vowle. He was six feet seven but lean and lanky; his height seemed more due to the elasticity of his neck than any real bone and muscle. He might have actually been just over five feet, with the rest coming from how he held his head up, making him look six feet seven in doorways. I measured him in chalk while he stood on a chair. And next to him, a well-proportioned man with a healthy complexion, was Jock Coan, known as the Fir Cone. He was only six feet five, practically a child next to Lammitter and Vowle. When the three of them walked together, they caused quite a stir in the Larut colony. The Malays ran around them as if they were the giant sequoias in Yosemite Valley—these three Tall Men of Larut. It was utterly ridiculous—a freak of nature—that such a small place could have contained perhaps the three tallest ordinary men on the planet.'

‘Obsairve now the order o’ things. For it led to the finest big drink in Larut, and six sore heads the morn that endured for a week. I am against immoderate liquor, but the event to follow was a justification. You must understand that many coasting steamers call at Larut wi’ strangers o’ the mercantile profession. In the spring time, when the young cocoanuts were ripening, and the trees o’ the forests were putting forth their leaves, there came an American man to Larut, and he was six foot three, or it may have been four, in his stockings. He came on business from Sacramento, but he stayed for pleasure wi’ the Lang Men o’ Larut. Less than, a half o’ the population were ordinar’ in their girth and stature, ye will understand—Howson and Nailor, merchants, five feet nine or thereabouts. He had business with those two, and he stood above them from the six feet threedom o’ his height till they went to drink. In the course o’ conversation he said, as tall men will, things about his height, and the trouble of it to him. That was his pride o’ the flesh.

‘Observe now the order of things. It led to the best big drink in Larut, and six hangovers the next day that lasted for a week. I'm against excessive drinking, but the event that followed was worth it. You need to understand that many coastal steamers stop at Larut with strangers from the business world. In the spring, when the young coconuts were ripening and the trees in the forests were budding, an American man came to Larut, and he was six foot three, or maybe four, in his socks. He came on business from Sacramento, but he stayed for fun with the Lang Men of Larut. Less than half of the population was ordinary in size, you'll understand—Howson and Nailor, merchants, around five feet nine or so. He had business with those two, and he towered over them from his six-foot-three height until they went to drink. During the conversation, he mentioned, as tall men often do, things about his height and the troubles it caused him. That was his pride of the flesh.

‘“As the longest man in the island—” he said, but there they took him up and asked if he were sure.

‘“As the tallest guy on the island—” he said, but then they picked him up and asked if he was sure.

‘“I say I am the longest man in the island,” he said, “and on that I’ll bet my substance.”

‘“I claim I’m the tallest guy on the island,” he said, “and I’ll bet everything I have on it.”

‘They laid down the bed-plates of a big drink then and there, and put it aside while they called Jock Coan from his house, near by among the fireflies’ winking.

‘They set down the base for a large drink right then and there and left it aside while they called Jock Coan from his house nearby, among the blinking fireflies.’

‘“How’s a’ wi’ you?” said Jock, and came in by the side o’ the Sacramento profligate, two inches, or it may have been one, taller than he.

‘“How’s it going with you?” said Jock, and walked in beside the Sacramento wastrel, two inches, or maybe just one, taller than him.

‘“You’re long,” said the man, opening his eyes. “But I am longer.” An’ they sent a whistle through the night an’ howkit out Sandy Vowle from his bit bungalow, and he came in an’ stood by the side o’ Jock, an’ the pair just fillit the room to the ceiling-cloth.

‘“You’re tall,” said the man, opening his eyes. “But I’m taller.” Then they blew a whistle through the night and called out Sandy Vowle from his little bungalow, and he came in and stood next to Jock, and the two of them filled the room to the ceiling.

‘The Sacramento man was a euchre-player and a most profane sweerer. “You hold both Bowers,” he said, “but the Joker is with me.”

‘The Sacramento man was a euchre player and a heavy swearer. “You have both Bowers,” he said, “but the Joker is on my side.”

‘“Fair an’ softly,” says Nailor. “Jock, whaur’s Lang Lammitter?”

“Slow down,” says Nailor. “Jock, where’s Lang Lammitter?”

‘“Here,” says that man, putting his leg through the window and coming in like an anaconda o’ the desert furlong by furlong, one foot in Penang and one in Batavia, and a hand in North Borneo it may be.

‘“Here,” says that man, as he puts his leg through the window and comes in like an anaconda, slowly making his way, one foot in Penang and one in Batavia, and maybe a hand in North Borneo.

‘“Are you suited?” said Nailor, when the hinder end o’ Lang Lammitter was slidden through the sill an’ the head of Lammitter was lost in the smoke away above.

‘“Are you suited?” Nailor asked, as the back end of Lang Lammitter slid through the doorway and the front of Lammitter disappeared into the smoke above.’

‘The American man took out his card and put it on the table. “Esdras B. Longer is my name, America is my nation, ‘Frisco is my resting-place, but this here beats Creation,” said he. “Boys, giants—side-show giants—I minded to slide out of my bet if I had been overtopped, on the strength of the riddle on this paste-board. I would have done it if you had topped me even by three inches, but when it comes to feet—yards—miles, I am not the man to shirk the biggest drink that ever made the travellers’-joy palm blush with virginal indignation, or the orang-outang and the perambulating dyak howl with envy. Set them up and continue till the final conclusion.”

‘The American man took out his card and placed it on the table. “Esdras B. Longer is my name, America is my country, ‘Frisco is my home base, but this here tops everything,” he said. “Guys, giants—side-show giants—I was thinking about backing out of my bet if I got outdone, based on what’s written on this card. I would have done it if you had beat me by even three inches, but when it comes to feet—yards—miles, I’m not the kind of guy to back away from the biggest drink that ever made the travellers’-joy palm blush with pure shock, or the orangutan and the wandering dyak yell with jealousy. Let’s keep them coming and go until the very end.”

‘O mon, I tell you ‘twas an awful sight to see those four giants threshing about the house and the island, and tearin’ down the pillars thereof an’ throwing palm-trees broadcast, and currling their long legs round the hills o’ Larut. An awfu’ sight! I was there. I did not mean to tell you, but it’s out now. I was not overcome, for I e’en sat me down under the pieces o’ the table at four the morn an’ meditated upon the strangeness of things.

‘Oh man, I tell you it was an awful sight to see those four giants thrashing around the house and the island, tearing down the pillars and tossing palm trees everywhere, and curling their long legs around the hills of Larut. An awful sight! I was there. I didn’t mean to tell you, but it’s out now. I wasn’t scared; I just sat down under the broken pieces of the table at four in the morning and thought about how strange everything was.

‘Losh, yon’s the breakfast-bell!’

"Wow, there’s the breakfast bell!"





REINGELDER AND THE GERMAN FLAG

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & CO.]

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & CO.]

Hans Breitmann paddled across the deck in his pink pyjamas, a cup of tea in one hand and a cheroot in the other, when the steamer was sweltering down the coast on her way to Singapur. He drank beer all day and all night, and played a game called ‘Scairt’ with three compatriots.

Hans Breitmann strolled across the deck in his pink pajamas, a cup of tea in one hand and a cigar in the other, while the steamer was cruising down the coast on its way to Singapore. He drank beer all day and all night, and played a game called 'Scairt' with three friends.

‘I haf washed,’ said he in a voice of thunder, ‘but dere is no use washing on these hell-seas. Look at me—I am still all wet and schweatin’. It is der tea dot makes me so. Boy, bring me Bilsener on ice.’

‘I have washed,’ he said in a booming voice, ‘but there’s no point in washing in these hellish seas. Look at me—I’m still all wet and sweating. It’s the tea that makes me this way. Kid, bring me a cold Bilsener.’

‘You will die if you drink beer before breakfast,’ said one man. ‘Beer is the worst thing in the world for—’

‘You’ll die if you drink beer before breakfast,’ said one guy. ‘Beer is the worst thing in the world for—’

‘Ya, I know—der liver. I haf no liver, und I shall not die. At least I will not die obon dese benny sdeamers dot haf no beer fit to trink. If I should haf died, I will haf don so a hoondert dimes before now—in Shermany, in New York, in Japon, in Assam, und all over der inside bans of South Amerique. Also in Shamaica should I hat died or in Siam, but I am here; und der are my orchits dot I have drafelled all the vorld round to find.’

‘Yeah, I know—my liver. I have no liver, and I won’t die. At least I won't die because of these miserable streams that have no beer worth drinking. If I were going to die, I would have done so a hundred times by now—in Germany, in New York, in Japan, in Assam, and all over the interior banks of South America. Also in Jamaica I would have died or in Siam, but I'm here; and there are my orchids that I've traveled the whole world to find.’

He pointed towards the wheel, where, in two rough wooden boxes, lay a mass of shrivelled vegetation, supposed by all the ship to represent Assam orchids of fabulous value.

He pointed to the wheel, where, in two rough wooden boxes, lay a pile of dried-up plants, believed by everyone on the ship to be Assam orchids of incredible value.

Now, orchids do not grow in the main streets of towns, and Hans Breitmann had gone far to get his. There was nothing that he had not collected that year, from king-crabs to white kangaroos.

Now, orchids don’t grow on the main streets of towns, and Hans Breitmann had traveled a long way to get his. There was nothing he hadn’t collected that year, from king crabs to white kangaroos.

‘Lisden now,’ said he, after he had been speaking for not much more than ten minutes without a pause; ‘Lisden und I will dell you a sdory to show how bad und worse it is to go gollectin’ und belief vot anoder fool haf said. Dis was in Uraguay which was in Amerique—North or Sout’ you would not know—und I was hoontin’ orchits und aferydings else dot I could back in my kanasters—dot is drafelling sbecimen-gaces. Dere vas den mit me anoder man—Reingelder, dot vas his name—und he vas hoontin’ also but only coral-snakes—joost Uraguay coral-snakes—aferykind you could imagine. I dell you a coral-snake is a peauty—all red und white like coral dot has been gestrung in bands upon der neck of a girl. Dere is one snake howefer dot we who gollect know ash der Sherman Flag, pecause id is red und plack und white, joost like a sausage mit druffles. Reingelder he was naturalist—goot man—goot trinker—better as me! “By Gott,” said Reingelder, “I will get a Sherman Flag snake or I will die.” Und we toorned all Uraguay upside-behint all pecause of dot Sherman Flag.

“Listen now,” he said, after he had been talking for just over ten minutes without stopping; “Listen and I’ll tell you a story to show how bad and worse it is to go collecting and believe what another fool has said. This was in Uruguay, which is in America—North or South, you wouldn’t know—and I was hunting orchids and everything else that I could fit in my cases—that is, traveling specimen cases. There was with me another man—Reingelder, that was his name—and he was hunting too, but only coral snakes—just Uruguay coral snakes—any kind you could imagine. I tell you, a coral snake is a beauty—all red and white like coral that has been strung in bands around a girl’s neck. There is one snake, however, that we who collect know as the Sherman Flag, because it is red and black and white, just like a sausage with truffles. Reingelder was a naturalist—a good man—good drinker—better than me! “By God,” said Reingelder, “I will get a Sherman Flag snake or I will die.” And we turned all of Uruguay upside down because of that Sherman Flag.

‘Von day when we was in none knows where—shwingin’ in our hummocks among der woods, oop comes a natif woman mit a Sherman Flag in a bickle-bottle—my bickle-bottle—und we both fell from our hummocks flat ubon our pot—what you call stomach—mit shoy at dis thing. Now I was gollectin’ orchits also, und I knowed dot der idee of life to Reingelder vas dis Sherman Flag. Derefore I bicked myselfs oop und I said, “Reingelder, dot is YOUR find.”—“Heart’s true friend, dou art a goot man,” said Reingelder, und mit dot he obens der bickle-bottle, und der natif woman she shqueals: “Herr Gott! It will bite.” I said—pecause in Uraguay a man must be careful of der insects—“Reingelder, shpifligate her in der alcohol und den she will be all right.”—“Nein,” said Reingelder, “I will der shnake alife examine. Dere is no fear. Der coral-shnakes are mitout shting-apparatus brofided.” Boot I looked at her het, und she vas der het of a boison-shnake—der true viper cranium, narrow und contract. “It is not goot,” said I, “she may bite und den—we are tree hoondert mile from aferywheres. Broduce der alcohol und bickle him alife.” Reingelder he had him in his hand—grawlin’ und grawlin’ as slow as a woorm und dwice as guiet. “Nonsense,” says Reingelder. “Yates haf said dot not von of der coral-shnakes haf der sack of boison.” Yates vas der crate authorite ubon der reptilia of Sout’ Amerique. He haf written a book. You do not know, of course, but he vas a crate authorite.

‘One day when we were in some unknown place—swinging in our hammocks among the woods, a native woman came up with a Sherman Flag in a bottle—my bottle—and we both fell from our hammocks flat on our stomachs in shock at this thing. Now I was collecting orchids too, and I knew that the idea of life for Reingelder was this Sherman Flag. So I picked myself up and said, “Reingelder, that is YOUR find.” “Heart's true friend, you are a good man,” said Reingelder, and with that he opened the bottle, and the native woman squealed: “Herr Gott! It will bite.” I said—because in Uruguay a man must be careful of insects—“Reingelder, bathe her in alcohol and then she will be all right.” “No,” said Reingelder, “I will examine the snake alive. There is no fear. The coral snakes lack a stinging apparatus.” But I looked at her head, and it was the head of a poisonous snake—the true viper skull, narrow and contracted. “It is not good,” I said, “she may bite and then—we are three hundred miles from anywhere. Bring the alcohol and bottle her alive.” Reingelder had her in his hand—crawling and crawling as slowly as a worm and twice as quiet. “Nonsense,” says Reingelder. “Yates has said that not one of the coral snakes has the venom sack.” Yates was the great authority on reptiles of South America. He has written a book. You don't know, of course, but he was a great authority.

‘I gum my eye upon der Sherman Flag, grawlin’ und grawlin’ in Reingelder’s fist, und der het vas not der het of innocence. “Mein Gott,” I said. “It is you dot will get der sack—der sack from dis life here pelow!”

‘I fix my gaze on the Sherman Flag, crawling and crawling in Reingelder’s fist, and it was not the fist of innocence. “My God,” I said. “It’s you who will get the sack—the sack from this life down here!”’

‘“Den you may haf der shnake,” says Reingelder, pattin’ it ubon her het. “See now, I will show you vat Yates haf written!”

‘“Then you can have the snake,” says Reingelder, patting it on her head. “Look now, I’ll show you what Yates has written!”‘

‘Uud mit dot he went indo his dent, unt brung out his big book of Yates; der Sherman Flag grawlin’ in his fist. “Yates haf said,” said Reingelder, und he throwed oben der book in der fork of his fist und read der passage, proofin’ conglusivement dot nefer coral-shnake bite vas boison. Den he shut der book mit a bang, und dot shqueeze der Sherman Flag, und she nip once und dwice.

‘Uud met Dot, and he went into his den and brought out his big book of Yates; the Sherman Flag gripping in his fist. “Yates has said,” said Reingelder, and he opened the book in the fork of his fist and read the passage, proving conclusively that no coral snake bite was poison. Then he shut the book with a bang, and that squeezed the Sherman Flag, and she nipped once and twice.

‘“Der liddle fool he haf bit me,” says Reingelder.

‘“The little fool bit me,” says Reingelder.

‘Dese things was before we know apout der permanganat-potash injection. I was discomfordable.

‘These things were before we knew about their permanganate-potash injection. I was uncomfortable.

‘“Die oop der arm, Reingelder,” said I, “und trink whisky ontil you can no more trink.”

‘“Open the bottle, Reingelder,” I said, “and drink whisky until you can’t drink anymore.”

‘“Trink ten tousand tevils! I will go to dinner,” said Reingelder, und he put her afay und it vas very red mit emotion.

“Damn it all! I’m going to dinner,” said Reingelder, and he pushed her away, and it was very red with emotion.

‘We lifed upon soup, horse-flesh, und beans for dinner, but before we vas eaten der soup, Reingelder he haf hold of his arm und cry, “It is genumben to der clavicle. I am a dead man; und Yates he haf lied in brint!”

‘We lived on soup, horsemeat, and beans for dinner, but before we ate the soup, Reingelder grabbed his arm and cried, “It is broken at the collarbone. I am a dead man; and Yates has lied in print!”’

‘I dell you it vas most sad, for der symbtoms dot came vas all dose of strychnine. He vas doubled into big knots, und den undoubled, und den redoubled mooch worse dan pefore, und he frothed. I vas mit him, saying, “Reingelder, dost dou know me?” but he himself, der inward gonsciousness part, was peyond knowledge, und so I know he vas not in bain. Den he wrop himself oop in von dremendous knot und den he died—all alone mit me in Uraguay. I was sorry, for I lofed Reingelder, und I puried him, und den I took der coral-shnake—dot Sherman Flag—so bad und dreacherous und I bickled him alife.

‘I tell you it was so sad, because the symptoms that showed up were all from strychnine. He was all twisted up in knots, and then he untwisted, and then he twisted up even worse than before, and he was frothing. I was with him, saying, “Reingelder, do you know me?” but he, the part of him that was aware inside, was beyond comprehension, so I knew he wasn’t in his right mind. Then he wrapped himself up in one big knot and then he died—all alone with me in Uruguay. I felt sorry, because I loved Reingelder, and I buried him, and then I took the coral snake—that Sherman Flag—so bad and treacherous, and I killed him alive.

‘So I got him: und so I lost Reingelder.’

‘So I got him: and so I lost Reingelder.’





THE WANDERING JEW

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by Macmillan & Co.]

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by Macmillan & Co.]

‘If you go once round the world in an easterly direction, you gain one day,’ said the men of science to John Hay. In after years John Hay went east, west, north, and south, transacted business, made love, and begat a family, as have done many men, and the scientific information above recorded lay neglected in the deeps of his mind with a thousand other matters of equal importance.

‘If you travel all the way around the world heading east, you gain a day,’ said the scientists to John Hay. Later on, John Hay traveled east, west, north, and south, conducted business, fell in love, and started a family, just like many other men, and the scientific knowledge noted above faded into the depths of his mind along with a thousand other equally important things.

When a rich relative died, he found himself wealthy beyond any reasonable expectation that he had entertained in his previous career, which had been a chequered and evil one. Indeed, long before the legacy came to him, there existed in the brain of John Hay a little cloud-a momentary obscuration of thought that came and went almost before he could realize that there was any solution of continuity. So do the bats flit round the eaves of a house to show that the darkness is falling. He entered upon great possessions, in money, land, and houses; but behind his delight stood a ghost that cried out that his enjoyment of these things should not be of long duration. It was the ghost of the rich relative, who had been permitted to return to earth to torture his nephew into the grave. Wherefore, under the spur of this constant reminder, John Hay, always preserving the air of heavy business-like stolidity that hid the shadow on his mind, turned investments, houses, and lands into sovereigns—-rich, round, red, English sovereigns, each one worth twenty shillings. Lands may become valueless, and houses fly heavenward on the wings of red flame, but till the Day of Judgment a sovereign will always be a sovereign—that is to say, a king of pleasures.

When a wealthy relative passed away, he found himself richer than he ever expected in his previous career, which had been turbulent and morally questionable. Even before he received the inheritance, John Hay had a fleeting thought—a brief moment of uncertainty that vanished almost as soon as he noticed it. Just like bats flit around the eaves of a house when dusk falls. He inherited vast wealth in money, land, and property; yet behind his joy lurked a haunting reminder that his enjoyment might not last long. It was the spirit of the wealthy relative, back to torment his nephew. Therefore, reminded constantly of this, John Hay, while maintaining a serious, business-like demeanor that concealed his inner turmoil, converted his investments, properties, and land into sovereigns—rich, shiny, red English coins, each worth twenty shillings. Land may lose its value, and houses can be consumed by fire, but until the Day of Judgment, a sovereign will always be a sovereign—that is to say, a king of pleasures.

Possessed of his sovereigns, John Hay would fain have spent them one by one on such coarse amusements as his soul loved; but he was haunted by the instant fear of Death; for the ghost of his relative stood in the hall of his house close to the hat-rack, shouting up the stairway that life was short, that there was no hope of increase of days, and that the undertakers were already roughing out his nephew’s coffin. John Hay was generally alone in the house, and even when he had company, his friends could not hear the clamorous uncle. The shadow inside his brain grew larger and blacker. His fear of death was driving John Hay mad.

With his money in hand, John Hay would have loved to spend it one by one on the simple pleasures his heart desired; however, he was constantly haunted by the looming fear of Death. The ghost of his relative loomed in the hall of his house, near the hat rack, yelling up the stairs that life was short, that there was no hope for more days, and that the undertakers were already preparing his nephew’s coffin. John Hay was usually alone in the house, and even when he had company, his friends couldn’t hear the loud uncle. The shadow inside his mind grew larger and darker. His fear of death was driving John Hay insane.

Then, from the deeps of his mind, where he had stowed away all his discarded information, rose to light the scientific fact of the Easterly journey. On the next occasion that his uncle shouted up the stairway urging him to make haste and live, a shriller voice cried, ‘Who goes round the world once easterly, gains one day.’

Then, from the depths of his mind, where he had stored all his useless information, came to light the scientific fact about traveling east. The next time his uncle shouted up the stairs, urging him to hurry and enjoy life, a sharper voice called out, "Whoever travels around the world once to the east gains a day."

His growing diffidence and distrust of mankind made John Hay unwilling to give this precious message of hope to his friends. They might take it up and analyse it. He was sure it was true, but it would pain him acutely were rough hands to examine it too closely. To him alone of all the toiling generations of mankind had the secret of immortality been vouchsafed. It would be impious—against all the designs of the Creator—to set mankind hurrying eastward. Besides, this would crowd the steamers inconveniently, and John Hay wished of all things to be alone. If he could get round the world in two months—some one of whom he had read, he could not remember the name, had covered the passage in eighty days—he would gain a clear day; and by steadily continuing to do it for thirty years, would gain one hundred and eighty days, or nearly the half of a year. It would not be much, but in course of time, as civilisation advanced, and the Euphrates Valley Railway was opened, he could improve the pace.

His increasing shyness and distrust of people made John Hay hesitant to share this valuable message of hope with his friends. They might pick it apart and analyze it. He was convinced it was true, but it would hurt him deeply if it were scrutinized too closely by unkind hands. Only he, out of all the hardworking generations of humanity, had been granted the secret of immortality. It would be wrong—against the will of the Creator—to urge humanity to rush eastward. Plus, that would overcrowd the steamers, and John Hay wanted nothing more than to be alone. If he could travel around the world in two months—someone he had read about, though he couldn’t remember the name, had done it in eighty days—he would gain an extra day; and by consistently doing this for thirty years, he would accumulate one hundred and eighty days, or nearly half a year. It wouldn't be a lot, but as civilization progressed and the Euphrates Valley Railway was built, he could increase the speed.

Armed with many sovereigns, John Hay, in the thirty-fifth year of his age, set forth on his travels, two voices bearing him company from Dover as he sailed to Calais. Fortune favoured him. The Euphrates Valley Railway was newly opened, and he was the first man who took ticket direct from Calais to Calcutta—thirteen days in the train. Thirteen days in the train are not good for the nerves; but he covered the world and returned to Calais from America in twelve days over the two months, and started afresh with four and twenty hours of precious time to his credit. Three years passed, and John Hay religiously went round this earth seeking for more time wherein to enjoy the remainder of his sovereigns. He became known on many lines as the man who wanted to go on; when people asked him what he was and what he did, he answered—

Armed with a lot of money, John Hay, at thirty-five, set off on his travels, with two companions alongside him from Dover as he sailed to Calais. Luck was on his side. The Euphrates Valley Railway had just opened, and he was the first person to buy a ticket directly from Calais to Calcutta—thirteen days on the train. Thirteen days on a train is tough on the nerves; but he traveled around the world and came back to Calais from America in just twelve days over two months, then started fresh with an extra twenty-four hours to spare. Three years went by, and John Hay diligently circled the globe searching for more time to enjoy his remaining wealth. He became known on many routes as the man who wanted to keep going; when people asked him who he was and what he did, he replied—

‘I’m the person who intends to live, and I am trying to do it now.’

‘I’m the person who plans to live, and I’m trying to do it right now.’

His days were divided between watching the white wake spinning behind the stern of the swiftest steamers, or the brown earth flashing past the windows of the fastest trains; and he noted in a pocket-book every minute that he had railed or screwed out of remorseless eternity.

His days were split between watching the white wake swirling behind the back of the fastest steamers or the brown earth rushing by the windows of the quickest trains; and he jotted down in a pocket notebook every minute he had wrested or squeezed out of unyielding time.

‘This is better than praying for long life,’ quoth John Hay as he turned his face eastward for his twentieth trip. The years had done more for him than he dared to hope.

‘This is better than praying for a long life,’ John Hay said as he turned his face eastward for his twentieth time. The years had given him more than he ever dared to hope.

By the extension of the Brahmaputra Valley line to meet the newly-developed China Midland, the Calais railway ticket held good via Karachi and Calcutta to Hongkong. The round trip could be managed in a fraction over forty-seven days, and, filled with fatal exultation, John Hay told the secret of his longevity to his only friend, the house-keeper of his rooms in London. He spoke and passed; but the woman was one of resource, and immediately took counsel with the lawyers who had first informed John Hay of his golden legacy. Very many sovereigns still remained, and another Hay longed to spend them on things more sensible than railway tickets and steamer accommodation.

By extending the Brahmaputra Valley line to connect with the newly developed China Midland, the Calais railway ticket was valid through Karachi and Calcutta to Hong Kong. The round trip could be completed in just over forty-seven days, and feeling a sense of fatal excitement, John Hay shared the secret of his longevity with his only friend, the housekeeper of his London rooms. He spoke and then faded away; however, the woman was resourceful and immediately consulted the lawyers who had first informed John Hay about his substantial inheritance. A lot of money still remained, and another Hay was eager to spend it on more practical things than railway tickets and steamship accommodations.

The chase was long, for when a man is journeying literally for the dear
life, he does not tarry upon the road. Round the world Hay swept anew,
and overtook the wearied Doctor, who had been sent out to look for him,
in Madras. It was there that he found the reward of his toil and the
assurance of a blessed immortality. In half an hour the Doctor, watching
always the parched lips, the shaking hands, and the eye that turned
eternally to the east, won John Hay to rest in a little house close to
the Madras surf. All that Hay need do was to hang by ropes from the roof
of the room and let the round earth swing free beneath him. This was
better than steamer or train, for he gained a day in a day, and was
thus the equal of the undying sun. The other Hay would pay his expenses
throughout eternity.

 It is true that we cannot yet take tickets from Calais to Hongkong,
though that will come about in fifteen years; but men say that if you
wander along the southern coast of India you shall find in a neatly
whitewashed little bungalow, sitting in a chair swung from the
roof, over a sheet of thin steel which he knows so well destroys the
attraction of the earth, an old and worn man who for ever faces the
rising sun, a stop-watch in his hand, racing against eternity. He cannot
drink, he does not smoke, and his living expenses amount to perhaps
twenty-five rupees a month, but he is John Hay, the Immortal. Without,
he hears the thunder of the wheeling world with which he is careful to
explain he has no connection whatever; but if you say that it is only
the noise of the surf, he will cry bitterly, for the shadow on his brain
is passing away as the brain ceases to work, and he doubts sometimes
whether the doctor spoke the truth.
The chase was long because when a man is literally running for his life, he doesn’t linger on the way. John Hay swept around the world again and caught up with the exhausted doctor, who had been sent out to find him, in Madras. It was there that he found the reward for his efforts and the promise of eternal life. In half an hour, the doctor, always watching Hay's parched lips, trembling hands, and eyes that constantly looked to the east, convinced him to rest in a small house near the Madras surf. All Hay needed to do was hang by ropes from the ceiling of the room and let the earth spin freely beneath him. This was better than taking a steamer or a train, as he gained a day for each day, thus becoming equal to the undying sun. The other Hay would cover his expenses for all eternity.

It’s true that we can’t yet buy tickets from Calais to Hong Kong, though that will happen in fifteen years; however, people say that if you wander along the southern coast of India, you’ll find an old and weary man in a neat little whitewashed bungalow, sitting in a chair hung from the roof, over a sheet of thin steel that he knows well disrupts the pull of the earth, always facing the rising sun with a stopwatch in his hand, racing against eternity. He doesn’t drink, he doesn’t smoke, and his living expenses are about twenty-five rupees a month, but he is John Hay, the Immortal. Outside, he hears the roar of the spinning world, with which he is careful to assert he has no connection; but if you say it’s just the sound of the surf, he will cry bitterly, for the shadow in his mind is fading as his brain stops functioning, and he occasionally doubts whether the doctor spoke the truth.

‘Why does not the sun always remain over my head?’ asks John Hay.

‘Why doesn’t the sun always stay over my head?’ asks John Hay.





THROUGH THE FIRE

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

The Policeman rode through the Himalayan forest, under the moss-draped oaks, and his orderly trotted after him.

The policeman rode through the Himalayan forest, beneath the moss-covered oaks, while his orderly followed closely behind.

‘It’s an ugly business, Bhere Singh,’ said the Policeman. ‘Where are they?’

‘It’s a ugly business, Bhere Singh,’ said the Policeman. ‘Where are they?’

‘It is a very ugly business,’ said Bhere Singh; ‘and as for THEM, they are, doubtless, now frying in a hotter fire than was ever made of spruce-branches.’

‘It’s a really unpleasant situation,’ said Bhere Singh; ‘and as for THEM, they’re definitely now burning in a hotter fire than ever came from spruce branches.’

‘Let us hope not,’ said the Policeman, ‘for, allowing for the difference between race and race, it’s the story of Francesca da Rimini, Bhere Singh.’

"Let’s hope not," said the Policeman, "because, considering the differences between races, it's the story of Francesca da Rimini, Bhere Singh."

Bhere Singh knew nothing about Francesca da Rimini, so he held his peace until they came to the charcoal-burners’ clearing where the dying flames said ‘whit, whit, whit’ as they fluttered and whispered over the white ashes. It must have been a great fire when at full height. Men had seen it at Donga Pa across the valley winking and blazing through the night, and said that the charcoal-burners of Kodru were getting drunk. But it was only Suket Singh, Sepoy of the load Punjab Native Infantry, and Athira, a woman, burning—burning—burning.

Bhere Singh didn’t know anything about Francesca da Rimini, so he kept quiet until they reached the charcoal-burners’ clearing, where the dying flames crackled softly, making a 'whit, whit, whit' sound as they flickered and whispered over the white ashes. It must have been a huge fire at its peak. People had seen it from Donga Pa across the valley, flickering and blazing through the night, and said that the charcoal-burners of Kodru were getting drunk. But it was just Suket Singh, a sepoy in the Punjab Native Infantry, and Athira, a woman, burning—burning—burning.

This was how things befell; and the Policeman’s Diary will bear me out.

This is how things happened, and the Policeman’s Diary will confirm it.

Athira was the wife of Madu, who was a charcoal-burner, one-eyed and of a malignant disposition. A week after their marriage, he beat Athira with a heavy stick. A month later, Suket Singh, Sepoy, came that way to the cool hills on leave from his regiment, and electrified the villagers of Kodru with tales of service and glory under the Government, and the honour in which he, Suket Singh, was held by the Colonel Sahib Bahadur. And Desdemona listened to Othello as Desdemonas have done all the world over, and, as she listened, she loved.

Athira was married to Madu, a charcoal burner who was one-eyed and had a mean temperament. A week after they got married, he hit Athira with a heavy stick. A month later, Suket Singh, a soldier on leave from his regiment, passed through the cool hills and captivated the villagers of Kodru with stories of his service and glory under the Government, and the respect he received from Colonel Sahib Bahadur. And Desdemona listened to Othello like all Desdemonas have throughout history, and as she listened, she fell in love.

‘I’ve a wife of my own,’ said Suket Singh, ‘though that is no matter when you come to think of it. I am also due to return to my regiment after a time, and I cannot be a deserter—I who intend to be Havildar.’ There is no Himalayan version of ‘I could not love thee, dear, as much, Loved I not Honour more;’ but Suket Singh came near to making one.

‘I have my own wife,’ said Suket Singh, ‘but that doesn’t really matter when you think about it. I also need to go back to my regiment soon, and I can’t be a deserter—I intend to become a Havildar.’ There isn’t a Himalayan equivalent of ‘I could not love thee, dear, as much, Loved I not Honour more;’ but Suket Singh came close to creating one.

‘Never mind,’ said Athira, ‘stay with me, and, if Madu tries to beat me, you beat him.’

‘Never mind,’ said Athira, ‘stay with me, and if Madu tries to hit me, you hit him back.’

‘Very good,’ said Suket Singh; and he beat Madu severely, to the delight of all the charcoal-burners of Kodru.

‘Very good,’ said Suket Singh; and he harshly beat Madu, to the delight of all the charcoal-burners of Kodru.

‘That is enough,’ said Suket Singh, as he rolled Madu down the hillside. ‘Now we shall have peace.’ But Madu crawled up the grass slope again, and hovered round his hut with angry eyes.

‘That’s enough,’ said Suket Singh, as he rolled Madu down the hillside. ‘Now we’ll have peace.’ But Madu crawled up the grass slope again and hovered around his hut with angry eyes.

‘He’ll kill me dead,’ said Athira to Suket Singh. ‘You must take me away.’

‘He’s going to kill me,’ Athira said to Suket Singh. ‘You have to get me out of here.’

‘There’ll be a trouble in the Lines. My wife will pull out my beard; but never mind,’ said Suket Singh, ‘I will take you.’

‘There’s going to be trouble at home. My wife will pull my beard out; but don’t worry,’ said Suket Singh, ‘I’ll take you.’

There was loud trouble in the Lines, and Suket Singh’s beard was pulled, and Suket Singh’s wife went to live with her mother and took away the children. ‘That’s all right,’ said Athira; and Suket Singh said, ‘Yes, that’s all right.’

There was a lot of noise in the Lines, and Suket Singh's beard got yanked, and Suket Singh's wife moved back in with her mom and took the kids with her. "That's fine," said Athira; and Suket Singh replied, "Yeah, that's fine."

So there was only Madu left in the hut that looks across the valley to Donga Pa; and, since the beginning of time, no one has had any sympathy for husbands so unfortunate as Madu.

So there was only Madu left in the hut that looks across the valley to Donga Pa; and, since the dawn of time, no one has felt any sympathy for husbands as unfortunate as Madu.

He went to Juseen Daze, the wizard-man who keeps the Talking Monkey’s Head.

He went to Juseen Daze, the wizard who has the Talking Monkey’s Head.

‘Get me back my wife,’ said Madu.

‘Get my wife back,’ said Madu.

‘I can’t,’ said Juseen Daze, ‘until you have made the Sutlej in the valley run up the Donga Pa.’

‘I can’t,’ said Juseen Daze, ‘until you make the Sutlej in the valley run up the Donga Pa.’

‘No riddles,’ said Madu, and he shook his hatchet above Juseen Daze’s white head.

‘No riddles,’ Madu said, shaking his hatchet over Juseen Daze’s white head.

‘Give all your money to the headmen of the village,’ said Juseen Daze; ‘and they will hold a communal Council, and the Council will send a message that your wife must come back.’

‘Give all your money to the village leaders,’ Juseen Daze said; ‘and they will hold a meeting, and the meeting will send a message that your wife needs to return.’

So Madu gave up all his worldly wealth, amounting to twenty-seven rupees, eight annas, three pice, and a silver chain, to the Council of Kodru. And it fell as Juseen Daze foretold.

So Madu gave up all his worldly possessions, totaling twenty-seven rupees, eight annas, three pice, and a silver chain, to the Council of Kodru. And it happened just as Juseen Daze predicted.

They sent Athira’s brother down into Suket Singh’s regiment to call Athira home. Suket Singh kicked him once round the Lines, and then handed him over to the Havildar, who beat him with a belt.

They sent Athira’s brother to Suket Singh’s regiment to bring Athira home. Suket Singh kicked him around the camp a bit, then handed him over to the Havildar, who whipped him with a belt.

‘Come back,’ yelled Athira’s brother.

“Come back!” yelled Athira’s brother.

‘Where to?’ said Athira.

"Where to?" Athira asked.

‘To Madu,’ said he.

"To Madu," he said.

‘Never,’ said she.

‘Never,’ she said.

‘Then Juseen Daze will send a curse, and you will wither away like a barked tree in the springtime,’ said Athira’s brother. Athira slept over these things.

‘Then Juseen Daze will cast a curse, and you will fade away like a stripped tree in the spring,’ said Athira’s brother. Athira pondered these words.

Next morning she had rheumatism. ‘I am beginning to wither away like a barked tree in the springtime,’ she said. ‘That is the curse of Juseen Daze.’

Next morning, she had arthritis. 'I'm starting to wither away like a damaged tree in spring,' she said. 'That's the curse of Juseen Daze.'

And she really began to wither away because her heart was dried up with fear, and those who believe in curses die from curses. Suket Singh, too, was afraid because he loved Athira better than his very life. Two months passed, and Athira’s brother stood outside the regimental Lines again and yelped, ‘Aha! You are withering away. Come back.’

And she truly started to fade because her heart was shriveled with fear, and those who believe in curses perish from them. Suket Singh was also scared because he loved Athira more than his own life. Two months went by, and Athira’s brother stood outside the regimental lines again and shouted, "Aha! You’re fading away. Come back."

‘I will come back,’ said Athira.

‘I will come back,’ said Athira.

‘Say rather that WE will come back,’ said Suket Singh.

‘Say instead that WE will come back,’ said Suket Singh.

‘Ai; but when?’ said Athira’s brother.

‘Ai; but when?’ said Athira’s brother.

‘Upon a day very early in the morning,’ said Suket Singh; and he tramped off to apply to the Colonel Sahib Bahadur for one week’s leave.

‘One early morning,’ said Suket Singh; and he walked off to request a week's leave from the Colonel Sahib Bahadur.

‘I am withering away like a barked tree in the spring,’ moaned Athira.

‘I am fading away like a stripped tree in the spring,’ moaned Athira.

‘You will be better soon,’ said Suket Singh; and he told her what was in his heart, and the two laughed together softly, for they loved each other. But Athira grew better from that hour.

‘You’ll be okay soon,’ said Suket Singh; and he shared what he truly felt, and the two laughed softly together, because they loved each other. From that moment on, Athira started to feel better.

They went away together, travelling third-class by train as the regulations provided, and then in a cart to the low hills, and on foot to the high ones. Athira sniffed the scent of the pines of her own hills, the wet Himalayan hills. ‘It is good to be alive,’ said Athira.

They left together, traveling in third class by train as the rules allowed, then by cart to the low hills, and finally on foot to the high ones. Athira inhaled the smell of the pines from her own hills, the damp Himalayan hills. “It’s good to be alive,” said Athira.

‘Hah!’ said Suket Singh. ‘Where is the Kodru road and where is the Forest Ranger’s house?’...

‘Hah!’ said Suket Singh. ‘Where’s the Kodru road and where’s the Forest Ranger’s house?’...

‘It cost forty rupees twelve years ago,’ said the Forest Ranger, handing the gun.

‘It cost forty rupees twelve years ago,’ said the Forest Ranger, handing over the gun.

‘Here are twenty,’ said Suket Singh, ‘and you must give me the best bullets.’

‘Here are twenty,’ said Suket Singh, ‘and you have to give me the best bullets.’

‘It is very good to be alive,’ said Athira wistfully, sniffing the scent of the pine-mould; and they waited till the night had fallen upon Kodru and the Donga Pa. Madu had stacked the dry wood for the next day’s charcoal-burning on the spur above his house. ‘It is courteous in Madu to save us this trouble,’ said Suket Singh as he stumbled on the pile, which was twelve foot square and four high. ‘We must wait till the moon rises.’

‘It’s really great to be alive,’ Athira said with a hint of nostalgia, taking in the smell of the pine mold. They waited for night to settle over Kodru and the Donga Pa. Madu had piled up the dry wood for the next day’s charcoal-burning on the slope above his house. ‘Madu is very thoughtful to save us this hassle,’ Suket Singh remarked as he tripped over the stack, which was twelve feet wide and four feet high. ‘We need to wait until the moon comes up.’

When the moon rose, Athira knelt upon the pile. ‘If it were only a Government Snider,’ said Suket Singh ruefully, squinting down the wire-bound barrel of the Forest Ranger’s gun.

When the moon came up, Athira knelt on the pile. ‘If only it was a Government Snider,’ Suket Singh said with a sigh, looking down the wire-bound barrel of the Forest Ranger’s gun.

‘Be quick,’ said Athira; and Suket Singh was quick; but Athira was quick no longer. Then he lit the pile at the four corners and climbed on to it, re-loading the gun.

‘Hurry up,’ said Athira; and Suket Singh hurried; but Athira was no longer quick. Then he lit the pile at the four corners and climbed onto it, reloading the gun.

The little flames began to peer up between the big logs atop of the
brushwood. ‘The Government should teach us to pull the triggers with
our toes,’ said Suket Singh grimly to the moon. That was the last public
observation of Sepoy Suket Singh.

 Upon a day, early in the morning, Madu came to the pyre and shrieked
very grievously, and ran away to catch the Policeman who was on tour in
the district.
The small flames started to peek out between the large logs on top of the brushwood. "The government should teach us to pull the triggers with our toes," Suket Singh said grimly to the moon. That was the last public statement made by Sepoy Suket Singh. 

One morning, Madu came to the pyre, cried out in despair, and ran off to catch the policeman who was patrolling the district.

‘The base-born has ruined four rupees’ worth of charcoal wood,’ Madu gasped. ‘He has also killed my wife, and he has left a letter which I cannot read, tied to a pine bough.’

‘The low-born has ruined four rupees’ worth of charcoal wood,’ Madu gasped. ‘He has also killed my wife, and he has left a letter that I can’t read, tied to a pine branch.’

In the stiff, formal hand taught in the regimental school, Sepoy Suket Singh had written—

In the rigid, formal handwriting taught in the military school, Sepoy Suket Singh had written—

‘Let us be burned together, if anything remain over, for we have made the necessary prayers. We have also cursed Madu, and Malak the brother of Athira—both evil men. Send my service to the Colonel Sahib Bahadur.’

‘Let’s burn together if there’s anything left, since we’ve said the necessary prayers. We’ve also cursed Madu and Malak, Athira’s brother—both are evil men. Please send my regards to Colonel Sahib Bahadur.’

The Policeman looked long and curiously at the marriage bed of red and white ashes on which lay, dull black, the barrel of the Ranger’s gun. He drove his spurred heel absently into a half-charred log, and the chattering sparks flew upwards. ‘Most extraordinary people,’ said the Policeman.

The Policeman stared at the marriage bed of red and white ashes, where the dull black barrel of the Ranger’s gun rested. He idly kicked a half-charred log with his spurred heel, sending sparks flying up. "Most extraordinary people," said the Policeman.

‘WHE-W, WHEW, OUIOU,’ said the little flames.

‘WHE-W, WHEW, OUIOU,’ said the little flames.

The Policeman entered the dry bones of the case, for the Punjab Government does not approve of romancing, in his Diary.

The policeman looked into the bare facts of the case since the Punjab Government doesn’t allow for any romance, in his diary.

‘But who will pay me those four rupees?’ said Madu.

‘But who’s going to give me those four rupees?’ asked Madu.





THE FINANCES OF THE GODS

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

The evening meal was ended in Dhunni Bhagat’s Chubara and the old priests were smoking or counting their beads. A little naked child pattered in, with its mouth wide open, a handful of marigold flowers in one hand, and a lump of conserved tobacco in the other. It tried to kneel and make obeisance to Gobind, but it was so fat that it fell forward on its shaven head, and rolled on its side, kicking and gasping, while the marigolds tumbled one way and the tobacco the other. Gobind laughed, set it up again, and blessed the marigold flowers as he received the tobacco.

The evening meal was over in Dhunni Bhagat’s Chubara, and the old priests were either smoking or counting their beads. A little naked child came in, mouth wide open, holding a handful of marigold flowers in one hand and a lump of stored tobacco in the other. It tried to kneel and show respect to Gobind, but it was so chubby that it fell forward onto its shaven head and rolled onto its side, kicking and gasping, while the marigolds went one way and the tobacco the other. Gobind laughed, picked it up again, and blessed the marigold flowers as he took the tobacco.

‘From my father,’ said the child. ‘He has the fever, and cannot come. Wilt thou pray for him, father?’

‘From my dad,’ said the child. ‘He has a fever and can’t come. Will you pray for him, dad?’

‘Surely, littlest; but the smoke is on the ground, and the night-chill is in the airs, and it is not good to go abroad naked in the autumn.’

‘Surely, little one; but the smoke is on the ground, and the night chill is in the air, and it’s not wise to go outside naked in the autumn.’

‘I have no clothes,’ said the child, ‘and all to-day I have been carrying cow-dung cakes to the bazar. It was very hot, and I am very tired.’ It shivered a little, for the twilight was cool.

‘I have no clothes,’ said the child, ‘and I've been carrying cow-dung cakes to the market all day. It was really hot, and I’m very tired.’ It shivered a bit since the evening was cool.

Gobind lifted an arm under his vast tattered quilt of many colours, and made an inviting little nest by his side. The child crept in, and Gobind filled his brass-studded leather waterpipe with the new tobacco. When I came to the Chubara the shaven head with the tuft atop, and the beady black eyes looked out of the folds of the quilt as a squirrel looks out from his nest, and Gobind was smiling while the child played with his beard.

Gobind raised an arm under his large, worn quilt of many colors and created a cozy little spot next to him. The child crawled in, and Gobind packed his brass-studded leather waterpipe with the fresh tobacco. When I arrived at the Chubara, the shaven head with the tuft on top and the beady black eyes peeked out from the folds of the quilt like a squirrel from its nest, and Gobind was smiling as the child played with his beard.

I would have said something friendly, but remembered in time that if the child fell ill afterwards I should be credited with the Evil Eye, and that is a horrible possession.

I would have said something nice, but then I remembered that if the child got sick later, people would blame me for having the Evil Eye, and that's a terrible thing.

‘Sit thou still, Thumbling,’ I said as it made to get up and run away. ‘Where is thy slate, and why has the teacher let such an evil character loose on the streets when there are no police to protect us weaklings? In which ward dost thou try to break thy neck with flying kites from the house-tops?’

‘Stay still, Thumbling,’ I said as it tried to get up and run away. ‘Where’s your slate, and why has the teacher allowed such a troublemaker to roam the streets when there are no police to protect us helpless ones? In which neighborhood are you trying to break your neck flying kites from the rooftops?’

‘Nay, Sahib, nay,’ said the child, burrowing its face into Gobind’s beard, and twisting uneasily. ‘There was a holiday to-day among the schools, and I do not always fly kites. I play ker-li-kit like the rest.’

‘No, Sir, no,’ said the child, burying its face in Gobind’s beard and squirming uncomfortably. ‘Today was a holiday at school, and I don’t always fly kites. I play ker-li-kit like everyone else.’

Cricket is the national game among the schoolboys of the Punjab, from the naked hedge-school children, who use an old kerosene-tin for wicket, to the B.A.‘s of the University, who compete for the Championship belt.

Cricket is the national sport for schoolboys in Punjab, from the kids at hedge schools using an old kerosene tin as a wicket to the university students competing for the championship belt.

‘Thou play kerlikit! Thou art half the height of the bat!’ I said.

'You play kerlikit! You're half the height of the bat!' I said.

The child nodded resolutely. ‘Yea, I DO play. PERLAYBALL OW-AT! RAN, RAN, RAN! I know it all.’

The child nodded firmly. “Yeah, I DO play. PLAYBALL OVER THERE! RUN, RUN, RUN! I know it all.”

‘But thou must not forget with all this to pray to the Gods according to custom,’ said Gobind, who did not altogether approve of cricket and western innovations.

‘But you must not forget to pray to the Gods according to tradition,’ said Gobind, who didn’t fully approve of cricket and Western changes.

‘I do not forget,’ said the child in a hushed voice.

‘I don’t forget,’ said the child in a quiet voice.

‘Also to give reverence to thy teacher, and’—Gobind’s voice softened—’ to abstain from pulling holy men by the beard, little badling. Eh, eh, eh?’

‘Also to show respect to your teacher, and’—Gobind’s voice softened—’ to avoid tugging on holy men’s beards, you little rascal. Eh, eh, eh?’

The child’s face was altogether hidden in the great white beard, and it began to whimper till Gobind soothed it as children are soothed all the world over, with the promise of a story.

The child's face was completely covered by the big white beard, and it started to whimper until Gobind comforted it the way all children are comforted around the world, with the promise of a story.

‘I did not think to frighten thee, senseless little one. Look up! Am I angry? Are, are, are! Shall I weep too, and of our tears make a great pond and drown us both, and then thy father will never get well, lacking thee to pull his beard? Peace, peace, and I will tell thee of the Gods. Thou hast heard many tales?’

‘I didn’t mean to scare you, silly little one. Look up! Am I angry? Yes, yes, yes! Should I cry too, and with our tears make a big pond to drown us both, and then your dad will never get better without you to pull his beard? Calm down, calm down, and I’ll tell you about the Gods. Have you heard many stories?’

‘Very many, father.’

‘A lot, dad.’

‘Now, this is a new one which thou hast not heard. Long and long ago when the Gods walked with men as they do to-day, but that we have not faith to see, Shiv, the greatest of Gods, and Parbati his wife, were walking in the garden of a temple.’

‘Now, this is something new that you haven't heard. A long time ago, when the gods walked among humans like they do today, but we lack the faith to see it, Shiv, the greatest of gods, and Parbati, his wife, were walking in the garden of a temple.’

‘Which temple? That in the Nandgaon ward?’ said the child.

‘Which temple? The one in the Nandgaon neighborhood?’ said the child.

‘Nay, very far away. Maybe at Trimbak or Hurdwar, whither thou must make pilgrimage when thou art a man. Now, there was sitting in the garden under the jujube trees, a mendicant that had worshipped Shiv for forty years, and he lived on the offerings of the pious, and meditated holiness night and day.’

‘No, very far away. Maybe at Trimbak or Haridwar, where you must make a pilgrimage when you’re a man. Now, there was a beggar sitting in the garden under the jujube trees, who had worshipped Shiva for forty years. He lived off the offerings of the faithful and meditated on holiness day and night.’

‘Oh father, was it thou?’ said the child, looking up with large eyes.

‘Oh dad, was that you?’ said the child, looking up with wide eyes.

‘Nay, I have said it was long ago, and, moreover, this mendicant was married.’

‘No, I said it was a long time ago, and besides, this beggar was married.’

‘Did they put him on a horse with flowers on his head, and forbid him to go to sleep all night long? Thus they did to me when they made my wedding,’ said the child, who had been married a few months before.

‘Did they put him on a horse with flowers on his head and keep him awake all night long? That’s what they did to me when I got married,’ said the child, who had been married a few months earlier.

‘And what didst thou do?’ said I.

‘And what did you do?’ said I.

‘I wept, and they called me evil names, and then I smote HER, and we wept together.’

‘I cried, and they called me terrible names, and then I hit HER, and we cried together.’

‘Thus did not the mendicant,’ said Gobind; ‘for he was a holy man, and very poor. Parbati perceived him sitting naked by the temple steps where all went up and down, and she said to Shiv, “What shall men think of the Gods when the Gods thus scorn their worshippers? For forty years yonder man has prayed to us, and yet there be only a few grains of rice and some broken cowries before him after all. Men’s hearts will be hardened by this thing.” And Shiv said, “It shall be looked to,” and so he called to the temple which was the temple of his son, Ganesh of the elephant head, saying, “Son, there is a mendicant without who is very poor. What wilt thou do for him?” Then that great elephant-headed One awoke in the dark and answered, “In three days, if it be thy will, he shall have one lakh of rupees.” Then Shiv and Parbati went away.

‘So the mendicant didn’t,’ said Gobind; ‘because he was a holy man and very poor. Parbati saw him sitting naked by the temple steps where everyone walked by, and she said to Shiv, “What will people think of the Gods when the Gods disregard their worshippers like this? For forty years that man has prayed to us, and yet all he has in front of him are a few grains of rice and some broken cowries. People’s hearts will grow hard because of this.” And Shiv replied, “We will take care of it,” and he called to the temple that belonged to his son, Ganesh with the elephant head, saying, “Son, there’s a mendicant outside who is very poor. What will you do for him?” Then that great elephant-headed One stirred in the dark and answered, “In three days, if it’s your wish, he will have one lakh of rupees.” Then Shiv and Parbati left.

‘But there was a money-lender in the garden hidden among the marigolds’—the child looked at the ball of crumpled blossoms in its hands—‘ay, among the yellow marigolds, and he heard the Gods talking. He was a covetous man, and of a black heart, and he desired that lakh of rupees for himself. So he went to the mendicant and said, “O brother, how much do the pious give thee daily?” The mendicant said, “I cannot tell. Sometimes a little rice, sometimes a little pulse, and a few cowries and, it has been, pickled mangoes, and dried fish.”’

‘But there was a moneylender in the garden hidden among the marigolds’—the child looked at the bunch of crumpled blossoms in its hands—‘yes, among the yellow marigolds, and he overheard the Gods talking. He was a greedy man, with a dark heart, and he wanted that lakh of rupees for himself. So he approached the beggar and asked, “Hey brother, how much do the generous give you each day?” The beggar replied, “I can’t say. Sometimes a little rice, sometimes a little lentils, a few cowries, and occasionally, pickled mangoes, and dried fish.”’

‘That is good,’ said the child, smacking its lips.

‘That’s good,’ said the child, licking its lips.

‘Then said the money-lender, “Because I have long watched thee, and learned to love thee and thy patience, I will give thee now five rupees for all thy earnings of the three days to come. There is only a bond to sign on the matter.” But the mendicant said, “Thou art mad. In two months I do not receive the worth of five rupees,” and he told the thing to his wife that evening. She, being a woman, said, “When did money-lender ever make a bad bargain? The wolf runs through the corn for the sake of the fat deer. Our fate is in the hands of the Gods. Pledge it not even for three days.”

‘Then the money-lender said, “I've watched you for a long time and grown to admire your patience, so I’m willing to give you five rupees for all your earnings over the next three days. You just need to sign this agreement.” But the mendicant replied, “You’re crazy. I won’t earn the value of five rupees in two months,” and he shared this with his wife that evening. She, being a woman, said, “When has a money-lender ever made a poor deal? The wolf runs through the corn for the sake of the plump deer. Our fate is in the hands of the Gods. Don’t pledge it, even for three days.”’

‘So the mendicant returned to the money-lender, and would not sell. Then that wicked man sat all day before him offering more and more for those three days’ earnings. First, ten, fifty, and a hundred rupees; and then, for he did not know when the Gods would pour down their gifts, rupees by the thousand, till he had offered half a lakh of rupees. Upon this sum the mendicant’s wife shifted her counsel, and the mendicant signed the bond, and the money was paid in silver; great white bullocks bringing it by the cartload. But saving only all that money, the mendicant received nothing from the Gods at all, and the heart of the money-lender was uneasy on account of expectation. Therefore at noon of the third day the money-lender went into the temple to spy upon the councils of the Gods, and to learn in what manner that gift might arrive. Even as he was making his prayers, a crack between the stones of the floor gaped, and, closing, caught him by the heel. Then he heard the Gods walking in the temple in the darkness of the columns, and Shiv called to his son Ganesh, saying, “Son, what hast thou done in regard to the lakh of rupees for the mendicant?” And Ganesh woke, for the money-lender heard the dry rustle of his trunk uncoiling, and he answered, “Father, one half of the money has been paid, and the debtor for the other half I hold here fast by the heel.”’

‘So the beggar went back to the moneylender and refused to sell. The greedy man then sat there all day, increasing his offers for those three days’ earnings. First, he offered ten, then fifty, then a hundred rupees; and since he didn't know when the Gods would grant their blessings, he began offering thousands of rupees, until he had promised half a lakh of rupees. At this point, the beggar’s wife changed her advice, and the beggar signed the contract, with the money paid in silver—great white oxen delivering it by the cartload. But apart from that money, the beggar received nothing from the Gods, and the moneylender grew anxious about his expectations. So, at noon on the third day, the moneylender went into the temple to spy on the plans of the Gods and to find out how the gift might come. While he was praying, a crack opened up between the stones of the floor, closing around his heel. Then he heard the Gods moving in the temple among the dark columns, and Shiva called out to his son Ganesh, saying, “Son, what have you done about the lakh of rupees for the beggar?” Ganesh stirred awake; the moneylender could hear the dry rustle of his trunk moving, and he replied, “Father, half of the money has been paid, and I have the debtor for the other half here, firmly held by the heel.”’

The child bubbled with laughter. ‘And the moneylender paid the mendicant?’ it said.

The child laughed happily. “So the moneylender paid the beggar?” it asked.

‘Surely, for he whom the Gods hold by the heel must pay to the uttermost. The money was paid at evening, all silver, in great carts, and thus Ganesh did his work.’

‘Surely, for the one whom the Gods have a grip on must pay in full. The money was paid in the evening, all in silver, in large carts, and that’s how Ganesh got his job done.’

‘Nathu! Ohe Nathu!’

‘Nathu! Hey Nathu!’

A woman was calling in the dusk by the door of the courtyard.

A woman was calling in the twilight by the door of the courtyard.

The child began to wriggle. ‘That is my mother,’ it said.

The child started to squirm. ‘That's my mom,’ it said.

‘Go then, littlest,’ answered Gobind; ‘but stay a moment.’

‘Go on then, little one,’ Gobind replied, ‘but hold on for a second.’

He ripped a generous yard from his patchwork-quilt, put it over the child’s shoulders, and the child ran away.

He tore a big piece from his patchwork quilt, placed it over the child's shoulders, and the child took off running.





THE AMIR’S HOMILY

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MacMillan & Co.]

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MacMillan & Co.]

His Royal Highness Abdur Rahman, Amir of Afghanistan, G.C.S.I., and trusted ally of Her Imperial Majesty the Queen of England and Empress of India, is a gentleman for whom all right-thinking people should have a profound regard. Like most other rulers, he governs not as he would but as he can, and the mantle of his authority covers the most turbulent race under the stars. To the Afghan neither life, property, law, nor kingship are sacred when his own lusts prompt him to rebel. He is a thief by instinct, a murderer by heredity and training, and frankly and bestially immoral by all three. None the less he has his own crooked notions of honour, and his character is fascinating to study. On occasion he will fight without reason given till he is hacked in pieces; on other occasions he will refuse to show fight till he is driven into a corner. Herein he is as unaccountable as the gray wolf, who is his blood-brother.

His Royal Highness Abdur Rahman, Amir of Afghanistan, G.C.S.I., and trusted ally of Her Imperial Majesty the Queen of England and Empress of India, is a gentleman deserving of great respect from all fair-minded people. Like most rulers, he governs not necessarily how he would like to but as best he can, and the weight of his authority covers a highly volatile population. For the Afghan, neither life, property, law, nor kingship are inviolable when his own desires drive him to revolt. He has a natural tendency towards theft, a hereditary inclination towards violence, and is openly and fundamentally immoral in all these aspects. Nevertheless, he possesses his own twisted sense of honor, and his character is intriguing to examine. Sometimes he will fight for no apparent reason until he is ultimately defeated; at other times, he will refuse to engage until he has no choice. In this way, he is as unpredictable as the gray wolf, who shares his bloodline.

And these men His Highness rules by the only weapon that they understand—the fear of death, which among some Orientals is the beginning of wisdom. Some say that the Amir’s authority reaches no farther than a rifle bullet can range; but as none are quite certain when their king may be in their midst, and as he alone holds every one of the threads of Government, his respect is increased among men. Gholam Hyder, the Commander-in-chief of the Afghan army, is feared reasonably, for he can impale; all Kabul city fears the Governor of Kabul, who has power of life and death through all the wards; but the Amir of Afghanistan, though outlying tribes pretend otherwise when his back is turned, is dreaded beyond chief and governor together. His word is red law; by the gust of his passion falls the leaf of man’s life, and his favour is terrible. He has suffered many things, and been a hunted fugitive before he came to the throne, and he understands all the classes of his people. By the custom of the East any man or woman having a complaint to make, or an enemy against whom to be avenged, has the right of speaking face to face with the king at the daily public audience. This is personal government, as it was in the days of Harun al Raschid of blessed memory, whose times exist still and will exist long after the English have passed away.

And these men are ruled by His Highness with the only weapon they understand—the fear of death, which is seen as the start of wisdom among some Eastern cultures. Some say that the Amir’s power stretches only as far as a bullet can travel; however, since no one is sure when their king might be present, and because he controls every aspect of the government, his authority is respected among the people. Gholam Hyder, the Commander-in-chief of the Afghan army, is reasonably feared because he has the power to execute; all of Kabul fears the Governor of Kabul, who holds the power of life and death in all the neighborhoods. But the Amir of Afghanistan, although the neighboring tribes may act differently when he isn’t around, is even more feared than both chief and governor combined. His word is final; the fate of a person’s life hangs by the whim of his emotions, and his favor is formidable. He has endured many hardships and was a hunted fugitive before ascending to the throne, so he understands all the social classes of his people. According to Eastern custom, anyone with a complaint or someone seeking revenge has the right to speak directly with the king during the daily public audience. This is personal governance, reminiscent of the era of Harun al Raschid of blessed memory, whose legacy continues and will endure long after the English have faded away.

The privilege of open speech is of course exercised at certain personal risk. The king may be pleased, and raise the speaker to honour for that very bluntness of speech which three minutes later brings a too imitative petitioner to the edge of the ever ready blade. And the people love to have it so, for it is their right.

The right to speak freely comes with some personal risk. The king might appreciate a speaker's honesty and reward them for it, while just moments later, someone who tries to imitate that bravery could find themselves facing the king's wrath. And the people enjoy this dynamic because it's their entitlement.

It happened upon a day in Kabul that the Amir chose to do his day’s work in the Baber Gardens, which lie a short distance from the city of Kabul. A light table stood before him, and round the table in the open air were grouped generals and finance ministers according to their degree. The Court and the long tail of feudal chiefs—men of blood, fed and cowed by blood—stood in an irregular semicircle round the table, and the wind from the Kabul orchards blew among them. All day long sweating couriers dashed in with letters from the outlying districts with rumours of rebellion, intrigue, famine, failure of payments, or announcements of treasure on the road; and all day long the Amir would read the dockets, and pass such of these as were less private to the officials whom they directly concerned, or call up a waiting chief for a word of explanation. It is well to speak clearly to the ruler of Afghanistan. Then the grim head, under the black astrachan cap with the diamond star in front, would nod gravely, and that chief would return to his fellows. Once that afternoon a woman clamoured for divorce against her husband, who was bald, and the Amir, hearing both sides of the case, bade her pour curds over the bare scalp, and lick them off, that the hair might grown again, and she be contented. Here the Court laughed, and the woman withdrew, cursing her king under her breath.

One day in Kabul, the Amir decided to do his work in the Baber Gardens, which are not far from the city. A light table was set up in front of him, surrounded by generals and finance ministers gathered according to their rank. The Court and a long line of feudal chiefs—powerful men who were sustained and subdued by blood—formed an irregular semicircle around the table, as the breeze from the Kabul orchards blew among them. All day long, sweaty couriers rushed in with letters from the outskirts, bringing news of rebellion, intrigue, famine, missed payments, or announcements of treasure on the way; and all day, the Amir would read the documents, passing on those that were less private to the officials they concerned or calling over a waiting chief for clarification. It was important to speak clearly to the ruler of Afghanistan. Then the stern man, wearing a black astrakhan cap with a diamond star on it, would nod seriously, and that chief would return to his companions. At one point that afternoon, a woman came forward demanding a divorce from her bald husband. After hearing both sides of the story, the Amir told her to pour curds over his bald head and lick them off so his hair would grow back, and she would be satisfied. The Court laughed at this, and the woman left, muttering curses against her king under her breath.

But when twilight was falling, and the order of the Court was a little relaxed, there came before the king, in custody, a trembling haggard wretch, sore with much buffeting, but of stout enough build, who had stolen three rupees—of such small matters does His Highness take cognisance.

But when dusk began to settle, and the Court’s rules were a bit less strict, a shaky, worn-out man was brought before the king, held in custody. He was bruised from the rough treatment but was sturdy enough, having stolen three rupees—such trivial matters catch His Highness's attention.

‘Why did you steal?’ said he; and when the king asks questions they do themselves service who answer directly.

‘Why did you steal?’ he asked; and when the king asks questions, those who respond directly do themselves a favor.

‘I was poor, and no one gave. Hungry, and there was no food.’

‘I was broke, and no one helped. Starving, and there was nothing to eat.’

‘Why did you not work?’

‘Why didn't you work?’

‘I could find no work, Protector of the Poor, and I was starving.’

‘I couldn’t find any work, Protector of the Poor, and I was starving.’

‘You lie. You stole for drink, for lust, for idleness, for anything but hunger, since any man who will may find work and daily bread.’

‘You’re lying. You stole for alcohol, for desire, for laziness, for anything other than hunger, since anyone who is willing can find work and earn a living.’

The prisoner dropped his eyes. He had attended the Court before, and he knew the ring of the death-tone.

The prisoner looked down. He had been to court before, and he recognized the sound of the death sentence.

‘Any man may get work. Who knows this so well as I do? for I too have been hungered—not like you, bastard scum, but as any honest man may be, by the turn of Fate and the will of God.’

‘Any man can find work. Who knows this better than I do? Because I've also been hungry—not like you, worthless trash, but like any honest person can be, due to the twists of Fate and the will of God.’

Growing warm, the Amir turned to his nobles all arow and thrust the hilt of his sabre aside with his elbow.

Growing warm, the Amir turned to his nobles all in a row and pushed the hilt of his saber aside with his elbow.

‘You have heard this Son of Lies? Hear me tell a true tale. I also was once starved, and tightened my belt on the sharp belly-pinch. Nor was I alone, for with me was another, who did not fail me in my evil days, when I was hunted, before ever I came to this throne. And wandering like a houseless dog by Kandahar, my money melted, melted, melted till—’ He flung out a bare palm before the audience. ‘And day upon day, faint and sick, I went back to that one who waited, and God knows how we lived, till on a day I took our best lihaf—silk it was, fine work of Iran, such as no needle now works, warm, and a coverlet for two, and all that we had. I brought it to a money-lender in a bylane, and I asked for three rupees upon it. He said to me, who am now the King, “You are a thief. This is worth three hundred.” “I am no thief,” I answered, “but a prince of good blood, and I am hungry.”—“Prince of wandering beggars,” said that money-lender, “I have no money with me, but go to my house with my clerk and he will give you two rupees eight annas, for that is all I will lend.” So I went with the clerk to the house, and we talked on the way, and he gave me the money. We lived on it till it was spent, and we fared hard. And then that clerk said, being a young man of a good heart, “Surely the money-lender will lend yet more on that lihaf,” and he offered me two rupees. These I refused, saying, “Nay; but get me some work.” And he got me work, and I, even I, Abdur Rahman, Amir of Afghanistan, wrought day by day as a coolie, bearing burdens, and labouring of my hands, receiving four annas wage a day for my sweat and backache. But he, this bastard son of naught, must steal! For a year and four months I worked, and none dare say that I lie, for I have a witness, even that clerk who is now my friend.’

'Have you heard this Son of Lies? Let me tell you a true story. I was once starving and had to tighten my belt around my empty stomach. I wasn’t alone; I had someone with me who didn’t abandon me during my tough times, when I was on the run, long before I reached this throne. As I wandered like a homeless dog by Kandahar, my money dwindled away, until—' He held out a bare palm to the audience. 'Day after day, feeling weak and ill, I went back to the one who waited for me, and God knows how we survived, until one day I took our best blanket—made of silk, a fine piece from Iran, crafted in a way no needle can manage today, warm, and a cover for two, our only possession. I brought it to a moneylender in a side street and asked for three rupees in exchange. He, who is now the King, said to me, “You’re a thief. This is worth three hundred.” I replied, “I’m not a thief but a prince of noble blood, and I’m hungry.” —“Prince of wandering beggars,” said the moneylender, “I don’t have any cash on me, but go to my house with my clerk, and he’ll give you two rupees and eight annas, because that’s all I’ll lend you.” So I went with the clerk to the house, we chatted along the way, and he gave me the money. We survived on it until it ran out, and it was tough. Then that clerk, a good-hearted young man, said, “Surely the moneylender will lend you more for that blanket,” and he offered me two rupees. I refused, saying, “No; instead, get me some work.” And he found me a job, and I, even I, Abdur Rahman, Amir of Afghanistan, worked day by day as a laborer, carrying loads and toiling with my hands, earning four annas a day for my sweat and back pain. But this worthless bastard had to steal! For a year and four months I worked, and no one can say I’m lying, for I have a witness, even that clerk who is now my friend.'

Then there rose in his place among the Sirdars and the nobles one clad in silk, who folded his hands and said, ‘This is the truth of God, for I, who, by the favour of God and the Amir, am such as you know, was once clerk to that money-lender.’

Then there stood up among the Sirdars and the nobles someone wearing silk, who clasped his hands and said, ‘This is the truth of God, for I, who, by the grace of God and the Amir, am as you know, was once a clerk to that money-lender.’

There was a pause, and the Amir cried hoarsely to the prisoner, throwing scorn upon him, till he ended with the dread ‘Dar arid,’ which clinches justice.

There was a pause, and the Amir shouted hoarsely at the prisoner, filled with contempt for him, until he concluded with the terrifying ‘Dar arid,’ which seals the verdict.

So they led the thief away, and the whole of him was seen no more together; and the Court rustled out of its silence, whispering, ‘Before God and the Prophet, but this is a man!’

So they took the thief away, and he was never seen again; the Court broke its silence, murmuring, ‘I swear to God and the Prophet, this is a man!’





JEWS IN SHUSHAN

[Footnote: Copyright, 1981, by Macmillan & Co.]

[Footnote: Copyright, 1981, by Macmillan & Co.]

My newly purchased house furniture was, at the least, insecure; the legs parted from the chairs, and the tops from the tables, on the slightest provocation. But such as it was, it was to be paid for, and Ephraim, agent and collector for the local auctioneer, waited in the verandah with the receipt. He was announced by the Mahomedan servant as ‘Ephraim, Yahudi’—Ephraim the Jew. He who believes in the Brotherhood of Man should hear my Elahi Bukhsh grinding the second word through his white teeth with all the scorn he dare show before his master. Ephraim was, personally, meek in manner—so meek indeed that one could not understand how he had fallen into the profession of bill-collecting. He resembled an over-fed sheep, and his voice suited his figure. There was a fixed, unvarying mask of childish wonder upon his face. If you paid him, he was as one marvelling at your wealth; if you sent him away, he seemed puzzled at your hard-heartedness. Never was Jew more unlike his dread breed. Ephraim wore list slippers and coats of duster-cloth, so preposterously patterned that the most brazen of British subalterns would have shied from them in fear. Very slow and deliberate was his speech, and carefully guarded to give offence to no one. After many weeks, Ephraim was induced to speak to me of his friends.

My newly bought house furniture was, to say the least, unstable; the legs of the chairs and the tops of the tables would come off at the slightest touch. But as it was, I had to pay for it, and Ephraim, the agent and collector for the local auctioneer, waited on the porch with the receipt. He was introduced by the Muslim servant as ‘Ephraim, Yahudi’—Ephraim the Jew. Anyone who believes in the Brotherhood of Man should see my Elahi Bukhsh grinding that second word through his teeth with all the disdain he could show in front of his boss. Ephraim was actually quite mild-mannered—so mild that it was hard to understand how he ended up in the profession of bill-collecting. He looked like a well-fed sheep, and his voice matched his appearance. There was a constant, unchanging look of childish wonder on his face. If you paid him, he seemed amazed by your wealth; if you turned him away, he looked confused by your stinginess. Never was there a Jew more unlike the stereotype. Ephraim wore slip-on shoes and jackets made of such ridiculously patterned duster cloth that even the most daring British subalterns would have hesitated to wear them. His speech was very slow and deliberate, carefully measured to avoid offending anyone. After many weeks, Ephraim finally agreed to talk to me about his friends.

‘There be eight of us in Shushan, and we are waiting till there are ten. Then we shall apply for a synagogue, and get leave from Calcutta. To-day we have no synagogue; and I, only I, am Priest and Butcher to our people. I am of the tribe of Judah—I think, but I am not sure. My father was of the tribe of Judah, and we wish much to get our synagogue. I shall be a priest of that synagogue.’

‘There are eight of us in Shushan, and we’re waiting until there are ten. Then we will apply for a synagogue and get permission from Calcutta. Right now, we don’t have a synagogue; I am, solely, the Priest and Butcher for our people. I’m from the tribe of Judah—I think, but I’m not certain. My father was from the tribe of Judah, and we really want to establish our synagogue. I will be a priest of that synagogue.’

Shushan is a big city in the North of India, counting its dwellers by the ten thousand; and these eight of the Chosen People were shut up in its midst, waiting till time or chance sent them their full congregation.

Shushan is a large city in northern India, housing tens of thousands of residents; and these eight members of the Chosen People were confined within it, waiting for time or opportunity to bring them their complete gathering.

Miriam the wife of Ephraim, two little children, an orphan boy of their people, Epraim’s uncle Jackrael Israel, a white-haired old man, his wife Hester, a Jew from Cutch, one Hyem Benjamin, and Ephraim, Priest and Butcher, made up the list of the Jews in Shushan. They lived in one house, on the outskirts of the great city, amid heaps of saltpetre, rotten bricks, herds of kine, and a fixed pillar of dust caused by the incessant passing of the beasts to the river to drink. In the evening the children of the City came to the waste place to fly their kites, and Ephraim’s sons held aloof, watching the sport from the roof, but never descending to take part in them. At the back of the house stood a small brick enclosure, in which Ephraim prepared the daily meat for his people after the custom of the Jews. Once the rude door of the square was suddenly smashed open by a struggle from inside, and showed the meek bill-collector at his work, nostrils dilated, lips drawn back over his teeth, and his hands upon a half-maddened sheep. He was attired in strange raiment, having no relation whatever to duster coats or list slippers, and a knife was in his mouth. As he struggled with the animal between the walls, the breath came from him in thick sobs, and the nature of the man seemed changed. When the ordained slaughter was ended, he saw that the door was open and shut it hastily, his hand leaving a red mark on the timber, while his children from the neighbouring house-top looked down awe-stricken and open-eyed. A glimpse of Ephraim busied in one of his religious capacities was no thing to be desired twice.

Miriam, Ephraim's wife, along with their two little kids, an orphan boy from their community, Ephraim’s uncle Jackrael Israel, a white-haired old man, his wife Hester, a Jew from Cutch, Hyem Benjamin, and Ephraim, who was both a priest and a butcher, made up the group of Jews in Shushan. They lived together in one house on the outskirts of the big city, surrounded by piles of saltpeter, crumbling bricks, herds of cattle, and a constant cloud of dust from the animals passing by to drink at the river. In the evenings, the children from the city came to this empty area to fly their kites, and Ephraim’s sons stayed back, watching from the roof but never joining in. Behind the house was a small brick pen where Ephraim prepared meat for his community according to Jewish customs. One time, the rough door of the pen was suddenly burst open by a struggle inside, revealing the meek bill collector at work, his nostrils flared, lips pulled back over his teeth, gripping a half-crazed sheep. He wore odd clothing that had nothing to do with dusters or slippers, and he had a knife in his mouth. As he wrestled with the animal within the walls, he gasped heavily, and it seemed his whole demeanor changed. Once the prescribed slaughter was finished, he noticed the door was open and quickly closed it, leaving a red mark on the wood, while his children from the neighboring rooftop looked down in shock and amazement. Seeing Ephraim busy with one of his religious duties was not something you wanted to witness more than once.

Summer came upon Shushan, turning the trodden waste-ground to iron, and bringing sickness to the city.

Summer arrived in Shushan, transforming the worn-out ground into hard dirt and bringing illness to the city.

‘It will not touch us,’ said Ephraim confidently. ‘Before the winter we shall have our synagogue. My brother and his wife and children are coming up from Calcutta, and THEN I shall be the priest of the synagogue.’

‘It won’t affect us,’ Ephraim said confidently. ‘Before winter, we will have our synagogue. My brother, his wife, and kids are coming up from Calcutta, and THEN I will be the priest of the synagogue.’

Jackrael Israel, the old man, would crawl out in the stifling evenings to sit on the rubbish-heap and watch the corpses being borne down to the river.

Jackrael Israel, the old man, would crawl out in the sweltering evenings to sit on the trash pile and watch the bodies being carried down to the river.

‘It will not come near us,’ said Jackrael Israel feebly, ‘for we are the People of God, and my nephew will be priest of our synagogue. Let them die.’ He crept back to his house again and barred the door to shut himself off from the world of the Gentile.

‘It won’t come near us,’ Jackrael Israel said weakly, ‘because we are the People of God, and my nephew will be the priest of our synagogue. Let them die.’ He went back into his house and locked the door to shut himself off from the world of the Gentiles.

But Miriam, the wife of Ephraim, looked out of the window at the dead as the biers passed and said that she was afraid. Ephraim comforted her with hopes of the synagogue to be, and collected bills as was his custom.

But Miriam, Ephraim's wife, looked out the window at the dead as the coffins passed and said she was scared. Ephraim comforted her with promises of the future synagogue and gathered bills as he usually did.

In one night, the two children died and were buried early in the morning by Ephraim. The deaths never appeared in the City returns. ‘The sorrow is my sorrow,’ said Ephraim; and this to him seemed a sufficient reason for setting at naught the sanitary regulations of a large, flourishing, and remarkably well-governed Empire.

In one night, the two children died and were buried early in the morning by Ephraim. Their deaths were never reported in the city's records. “Their sorrow is my sorrow,” Ephraim said; and to him, this felt like a good enough reason to ignore the health regulations of a large, thriving, and well-managed Empire.

The orphan boy, dependent on the charity of Ephraim and his wife, could have felt no gratitude, and must have been a ruffian. He begged for whatever money his protectors would give him, and with that fled down-country for his life. A week after the death of her children Miriam left her bed at night and wandered over the country to find them. She heard them crying behind every bush, or drowning in every pool of water in the fields, and she begged the cartmen on the Grand Trunk Road not to steal her little ones from her. In the morning the sun rose and beat upon her bare head, and she turned into the cool wet crops to lie down and never came back; though Hyem Benjamin and Ephraim sought her for two nights.

The orphan boy, reliant on the kindness of Ephraim and his wife, might not have felt any gratitude and could have been a troublemaker. He begged for whatever money his guardians would give him and then ran away down-country to escape. A week after her children died, Miriam got out of bed at night and roamed the countryside searching for them. She imagined hearing them crying behind every bush or drowning in every puddle in the fields, and she pleaded with the cart drivers on the Grand Trunk Road not to take her little ones away from her. In the morning, the sun rose and beat down on her bare head, so she stepped into the cool, wet crops to lie down and never returned, even though Hyem Benjamin and Ephraim searched for her for two nights.

The look of patient wonder on Ephraim’s face deepened, but he presently found an explanation. ‘There are so few of us here, and these people are so many,’ said he, ‘that, it may be, our God has forgotten us.’

The look of wonder on Ephraim’s face grew, but he quickly found an explanation. ‘There are so few of us here, and these people are so many,’ he said, ‘that maybe our God has forgotten us.’

In the house on the outskirts of the city old Jackrael Israel and Hester grumbled that there was no one to wait on them, and that Miriam had been untrue to her race. Ephraim went out and collected bills, and in the evenings smoked with Hyem Benjamin till, one dawning, Hyem Benjamin died, having first paid all his debts to Ephraim. Jackrael Israel and Hester sat alone in the empty house all day, and, when Ephraim returned, wept the easy tears of age till they cried themselves asleep.

In the house on the edge of the city, old Jackrael Israel and Hester complained that no one was there to take care of them, and that Miriam had betrayed her heritage. Ephraim went out to collect payments, and in the evenings, he smoked with Hyem Benjamin until one morning, Hyem Benjamin passed away, having settled all his debts with Ephraim first. Jackrael Israel and Hester sat alone in the empty house all day, and when Ephraim came back, they cried the easy tears of old age until they cried themselves to sleep.

A week later Ephraim, staggering under a huge bundle of clothes and cooking-pots, led the old man and woman to the railway station, where the bustle and confusion made them whimper.

A week later, Ephraim, struggling with a large load of clothes and cooking pots, took the old man and woman to the train station, where the noise and chaos made them whimper.

‘We are going back to Calcutta,’ said Ephraim, to whose sleeve Hester was clinging. ‘There are more of us there, and here my house is empty.’

‘We are going back to Calcutta,’ said Ephraim, to whose sleeve Hester was clinging. ‘There are more of us there, and my house here is empty.’

He helped Hester into the carriage and, turning back, said to me, ‘I should have been priest of the synagogue if there had been ten of us. Surely we must have been forgotten by our God.’

He helped Hester into the carriage and, turning back, said to me, ‘I would have been the priest of the synagogue if there had been ten of us. Surely we must have been forgotten by our God.’

The remnant of the broken colony passed out of the station on their journey south; while a subaltern, turning over the books on the bookstall, was whistling to himself ‘The Ten Little Nigger Boys.’

The leftover members of the broken colony left the station on their way south, while a junior officer, browsing through the books on the stall, was whistling to himself the tune of ‘The Ten Little Nigger Boys.’

But the tune sounded as solemn as the Dead March.

But the tune sounded as serious as a funeral march.

It was the dirge of the Jews in Shushan.

It was the funeral song of the Jews in Shushan.





THE LIMITATIONS OF PAMBE SERANG

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

If you consider the circumstances of the case, it was the only thing that he could do. But Pambe Serang has been hanged by the neck till he is dead, and Nurkeed is dead also.

If you think about the situation, it was the only thing he could do. But Pambe Serang has been hanged by the neck until dead, and Nurkeed is dead too.

Three years ago, when the Elsass-Lothringen steamer Saarbruck was coaling at Aden and the weather was very hot indeed, Nurkeed, the big fat Zanzibar stoker who fed the second right furnace thirty feet down in the hold, got leave to go ashore. He departed a ‘Seedee boy,’ as they call the stokers; he returned the full-blooded Sultan of Zanzibar—His Highness Sayyid Burgash, with a bottle in each hand. Then he sat on the fore-hatch grating, eating salt fish and onions, and singing the songs of a far country. The food belonged to Pambe, the Serang or head man of the lascar sailors. He had just cooked it for himself, turned to borrow some salt, and when he came back Nurkeed’s dirty black fingers were spading into the rice.

Three years ago, when the Elsass-Lothringen steamer Saarbruck was taking on coal in Aden and the weather was incredibly hot, Nurkeed, the hefty Zanzibar stoker who fed the second right furnace thirty feet down in the hold, got permission to go ashore. He left as a ‘Seedee boy,’ which is what they call the stokers; he returned as the full-blooded Sultan of Zanzibar—His Highness Sayyid Burgash, with a bottle in each hand. Then he sat on the fore-hatch grating, eating salted fish and onions, and singing songs from a faraway land. The food belonged to Pambe, the Serang or head man of the lascar sailors. He had just cooked it for himself, turned to grab some salt, and when he came back, Nurkeed’s dirty black fingers were digging into the rice.

A serang is a person of importance, far above a stoker, though the stoker draws better pay. He sets the chorus of ‘Hya! Hulla! Hee-ah! Heh!’ when the captain’s gig is pulled up to the davits; he heaves the lead too; and sometimes, when all the ship is lazy, he puts on his whitest muslin and a big red sash, and plays with the passengers’ children on the quarter-deck. Then the passengers give him money, and he saves it all up for an orgie at Bombay or Calcutta, or Pulu Penang. ‘Ho! you fat black barrel, you’re eating my food!’ said Pambe, in the Other Lingua Franca that begins where the Levant tongue stops, and runs from Port Said eastward till east is west, and the sealing-brigs of the Kurile Islands gossip with the strayed Hakodate junks.

A serang is someone important, much more so than a stoker, even though the stoker earns a better salary. He starts the cheer of ‘Hya! Hulla! Hee-ah! Heh!’ when the captain’s boat is lifted onto the davits; he takes soundings too; and sometimes, when the whole ship is being lazy, he puts on his brightest muslin shirt and a big red sash, playing with the passengers’ kids on the quarter-deck. Then the passengers give him money, and he saves it all up for a party in Bombay, Calcutta, or Penang. ‘Hey! you fat black barrel, you’re eating my food!’ said Pambe, in the Other Lingua Franca that starts where the Levant tongue ends, stretching from Port Said eastward until east becomes west, and the sealing brigs of the Kurile Islands chat with the lost Hakodate junks.

‘Son of Eblis, monkey-face, dried shark’s liver, pigman, I am the Sultan Sayyid Burgash, and the commander of all this ship. Take away your garbage;’ and Nurkeed thrust the empty pewter rice-plate into Pambe’s hand.

‘Son of Eblis, monkey-face, dried shark’s liver, pigman, I am the Sultan Sayyid Burgash, and the commander of this entire ship. Get rid of your trash;’ and Nurkeed shoved the empty pewter rice plate into Pambe’s hand.

Pambe beat it into a basin over Nurkeed’s woolly head. Nurkeed drew HIS sheath-knife and stabbed Pambe in the leg. Pambe drew his sheath-knife; but Nurkeed dropped down into the darkness of the hold and spat through the grating at Pambe, who was staining the clean fore-deck with his blood.

Pambe hit it into a basin over Nurkeed’s woolly head. Nurkeed pulled out his knife and stabbed Pambe in the leg. Pambe took out his knife; but Nurkeed dropped down into the darkness of the hold and spat through the grating at Pambe, who was getting blood all over the clean fore-deck.

Only the white moon saw these things; for the officers were looking after the coaling, and the passengers were tossing in their close cabins. ‘All right,’ said Pambe—and went forward to tie up his leg—‘we will settle the account later on.’

Only the white moon witnessed these events; the officers were tending to the coaling, and the passengers were tossing around in their cramped cabins. "All right," said Pambe, and he moved forward to tie up his leg. "We’ll settle the bill later."

He was a Malay born in India: married once in Burma, where his wife had a cigar-shop on the Shwe Dagon road; once in Singapore, to a Chinese girl; and once in Madras, to a Mahomedan woman who sold fowls. The English sailor cannot, owing to postal and telegraph facilities, marry as profusely as he used to do; but native sailors can, being uninfluenced by the barbarous inventions of the Western savage. Pambe was a good husband when he happened to remember the existence of a wife; but he was also a very good Malay; and it is not wise to offend a Malay, because he does not forget anything. Moreover, in Pambe’s case blood had been drawn and food spoiled.

He was a Malay born in India: married once in Burma, where his wife ran a cigar shop on Shwe Dagon road; once in Singapore, to a Chinese girl; and once in Madras, to a Muslim woman who sold chickens. An English sailor can’t, due to postal and telegraph services, marry as freely as he used to; but native sailors can, as they aren’t influenced by the harsh inventions of Western civilization. Pambe was a good husband when he remembered he had a wife, but he was also a very good Malay; and it's not wise to cross a Malay because he doesn’t forget anything. Plus, in Pambe's case, there had been violence and food wasted.

Next morning Nurkeed rose with a blank mind. He was no longer Sultan of Zanzibar, but a very hot stoker. So he went on deck and opened his jacket to the morning breeze, till a sheath-knife came like a flying-fish and stuck into the woodwork of the cook’s galley half an inch from his right armpit. He ran down below before his time, trying to remember what he could have said to the owner of the weapon. At noon, when all the ship’s lascars were feeding, Nurkeed advanced into their midst, and, being a placid man with a large regard for his own skin, he opened negotiations, saying, ‘Men of the ship, last night I was drunk, and this morning I know that I behaved unseemly to some one or another of you. Who was that man, that I may meet him face to face and say that I was drunk?’

The next morning, Nurkeed woke up feeling blank. He was no longer the Sultan of Zanzibar but just a very hot stoker. So he went on deck and opened his jacket to the morning breeze, when suddenly a knife came flying at him like a flying fish and lodged itself in the woodwork of the cook’s galley, half an inch from his right armpit. He rushed below deck before his shift was up, trying to remember what he could have said to the person who threw the weapon. At noon, when all the ship’s crew were eating, Nurkeed stepped into their midst, and being a calm man who valued his own skin, he started negotiations by saying, “Sailors of the ship, last night I was drunk, and this morning I realize that I acted inappropriately towards one of you. Who was that man, so I can meet with him face to face and apologize for my behavior?”

Pambe measured the distance to Nurkeed’s naked breast. If he sprang at him he might be tripped up, and a blind blow at the chest sometimes only means a gash on the breast-bone. Ribs are difficult to thrust between unless the subject be asleep. So he said nothing; nor did the other lascars. Their faces immediately dropped all expression, as is the custom of the Oriental when there is killing on the carpet or any chance of trouble. Nurkeed looked long at the white eyeballs. He was only an African, and could not read characters. A big sigh—almost a groan—broke from him, and he went back to the furnaces. The lascars took up the conversation where he had interrupted it. They talked of the best methods of cooking rice.

Pambe gauged the distance to Nurkeed’s bare chest. If he lunged at him, he might stumble, and a wild punch to the chest could just end up being a scrape on the breastbone. It’s hard to get between ribs unless the person is asleep. So, he stayed quiet; the other lascars did too. Their faces instantly lost all expression, as is typical for people in the East when violence is looming or trouble might arise. Nurkeed stared intently at the white of their eyes. He was just an African and couldn’t decipher expressions. A deep sigh—almost a groan—escaped him, and he returned to the furnaces. The lascars resumed the conversation from where he had left off. They discussed the best ways to cook rice.

Nurkeed suffered considerably from lack of fresh air during the run to Bombay. He only came on deck to breathe when all the world was about; and even then a heavy block once dropped from a derrick within a foot of his head, and an apparently firm-lashed grating on which he set his foot, began to turn over with the intention of dropping him on the cased cargo fifteen feet below; and one insupportable night the sheath-knife dropped from the fo’c’s’le, and this time it drew blood. So Nurkeed made complaint; and, when the Saarbruck reached Bombay, fled and buried himself among eight hundred thousand people, and did not sign articles till the ship had been a month gone from the port. Pambe waited too; but his Bombay wife grew clamorous, and he was forced to sign in the Spicheren to Hongkong, because he realised that all play and no work gives Jack a ragged shirt. In the foggy China seas he thought a great deal of Nurkeed, and, when Elsass-Lothringen steamers lay in port with the Spicheren, inquired after him and found he had gone to England via the Cape, on the Gravelotte. Pambe came to England on the Worth. The Spicheren met her by the Nore Light. Nurkeed was going out with the Spicheren to the Calicut coast.

Nurkeed really struggled without fresh air during the trip to Bombay. He only stepped onto the deck to get some air when there were people around, and even then, a heavy block fell from a derrick just a foot from his head. Additionally, a grating that seemed secure began to tilt, threatening to drop him onto the cased cargo fifteen feet below. One unbearable night, a sheath-knife fell from the forecastle, and this time it drew blood. So, Nurkeed complained, and when the Saarbruck arrived in Bombay, he escaped and hid among eight hundred thousand people, not signing onto another ship until a month after it left port. Pambe waited too, but his wife in Bombay became demanding, and he had to sign onto the Spicheren heading to Hong Kong, realizing that all play and no work leaves a sailor with a tattered shirt. While in the foggy waters of China, he thought a lot about Nurkeed. When the Elsass-Lothringen steamers were in port with the Spicheren, he asked about Nurkeed and learned that he had gone to England via the Cape on the Gravelotte. Pambe arrived in England on the Worth. The Spicheren met her near the Nore Light. Nurkeed was heading out with the Spicheren to the Calicut coast.

‘Want to find a friend, my trap-mouthed coal-scuttle?’ said a gentleman in the mercantile service. ‘Nothing easier. Wait at the Nyanza Docks till he comes. Every one comes to the Nyanza Docks. Wait, you poor heathen.’ The gentleman spoke truth. There are three great doors in the world where, if you stand long enough, you shall meet any one you wish. The head of the Suez Canal is one, but there Death comes also; Charing Cross Station is the second—for inland work; and the Nyanza Docks is the third. At each of these places are men and women looking eternally for those who will surely come. So Pambe waited at the docks. Time was no object to him; and the wives could wait, as he did from day to day, week to week, and month to month, by the Blue Diamond funnels, the Red Dot smoke-stacks, the Yellow Streaks, and the nameless dingy gypsies of the sea that loaded and unloaded, jostled, whistled, and roared in the everlasting fog. When money failed, a kind gentleman told Pambe to become a Christian; and Pambe became one with great speed, getting his religious teachings between ship and ship’s arrival, and six or seven shillings a week for distributing tracts to mariners. What the faith was Pambe did not in the least care; but he knew if he said ‘Native Ki-lis-ti-an, Sar’ to men with long black coats he might get a few coppers; and the tracts were vendible at a little public-house that sold shag by the ‘dottel,’ which is even smaller weight than the ‘half-screw,’ which is less than the half-ounce, and a most profitable retail trade.

“Looking to find a friend, my chatty coal bucket?” asked a guy in the commercial service. “It’s simple. Just hang out at the Nyanza Docks until he shows up. Everyone drops by the Nyanza Docks. Be patient, you poor soul.” The guy was right. There are three major spots in the world where, if you wait long enough, you will meet anyone you want. The head of the Suez Canal is one, but that’s also where Death shows up; Charing Cross Station is the second—for inland connections; and the Nyanza Docks is the third. At each of these places, men and women are endlessly searching for those they hope will return. So Pambe waited at the docks. Time didn’t matter to him; and the wives could also wait, just like he did day after day, week after week, and month after month, by the Blue Diamond funnels, the Red Dot smokestacks, the Yellow Streaks, and the nameless dirty boats of the sea that loaded and unloaded, jostled, whistled, and roared in the constant fog. When he ran out of money, a nice man suggested Pambe become a Christian; and Pambe jumped on it quickly, squeezing in his religious lessons between ship arrivals, earning six or seven shillings a week for handing out pamphlets to sailors. He didn’t care at all what the faith was, but he knew if he said, “Native Ki-lis-ti-an, Sir,” to men in long black coats, he might earn a few coins; and the pamphlets could be sold at a small pub that sold shag by the ‘dottel,’ which is an even smaller amount than the ‘half-screw,’ which itself is less than half an ounce, making for a very profitable retail business.

But after eight months Pambe fell sick with pneumonia, contracted from long standing still in slush; and much against his will he was forced to lie down in his two-and-sixpenny room raging against Fate.

But after eight months, Pambe got sick with pneumonia from standing around too long in the slush; and, much to his dismay, he was forced to lie down in his two-and-sixpenny room, furious with Fate.

The kind gentleman sat by his bedside, and grieved to find that Pambe talked in strange tongues, instead of listening to good books, and almost seemed to become a benighted heathen again—till one day he was roused from semi-stupor by a voice in the street by the dock-head. ‘My friend—he,’ whispered Pambe. ‘Call now—call Nurkeed. Quick! God has sent him!’

The kind man sat by his bedside and felt sad to see that Pambe was speaking in strange languages instead of enjoying good books, and it almost seemed like he was becoming a lost soul again—until one day he was jolted out of his daze by a voice in the street near the dock. "My friend—him," Pambe whispered. "Call now—call Nurkeed. Hurry! God has sent him!"

‘He wanted one of his own race,’ said the kind gentleman; and, going out, he called ‘Nurkeed!’ at the top of his voice. An excessively coloured man in a rasping white shirt and brand-new slops, a shining hat, and a breastpin, turned round. Many voyages had taught Nurkeed how to spend his money and made him a citizen of the world.

‘He wanted one of his own people,’ said the kind gentleman; and, stepping outside, he shouted, ‘Nurkeed!’ at the top of his lungs. A brightly dressed man in a loud white shirt and new pants, wearing a shiny hat and a breastpin, turned around. Many travels had taught Nurkeed how to manage his money and made him a global citizen.

‘Hi! Yes!’ said he, when the situation was explained. ‘Command him—black nigger—when I was in the Saarbruck. Ole Pambe, good ole Pambe. Dam lascar. Show him up, Sar;’ and he followed into the room. One glance told the stoker what the kind gentleman had overlooked. Pambe was desperately poor. Nurkeed drove his hands deep into his pockets, then advanced with clenched fists on the sick, shouting, ‘Hya, Pambe. Hya! Hee-ah! Hulla! Heh! Takilo! Takilo! Make fast aft, Pambe. You know, Pambe. You know me. Dekho, jee! Look! Dam big fat lazy lascar!’

‘Hey! Yeah!’ he said when the situation was explained. ‘Tell him—black guy—when I was in Saarbrücken. Old Pambe, good old Pambe. Damn crew member. Show him in, Sir;’ and he followed into the room. One glance told the stoker what the kind gentleman had missed. Pambe was in serious need. Nurkeed shoved his hands deep into his pockets, then moved forward with clenched fists toward the sick man, shouting, ‘Hey, Pambe. Hey! Hee-ah! Hulla! Heh! Takilo! Takilo! Make it secure at the back, Pambe. You know, Pambe. You know me. Look, man! Look! Damn big fat lazy crew member!’

Pambe beckoned with his left hand. His right was under his pillow. Nurkeed removed his gorgeous hat and stooped over Pambe till he could catch a faint whisper. ‘How beautiful!’ said the kind gentleman. ‘How these Orientals love like children!’

Pambe waved with his left hand. His right hand was under his pillow. Nurkeed took off his fancy hat and leaned over Pambe until he could hear a soft whisper. "How beautiful!" said the kind gentleman. "How these Easterners love like children!"

‘Spit him out,’ said Nurkeed, leaning over Pambe yet more closely.

‘Spit him out,’ said Nurkeed, leaning in even closer to Pambe.

‘Touching the matter of that fish and onions—’ said Pambe—and sent the knife home under the edge of the rib-bone upwards and forwards.

‘About that fish and onions—’ said Pambe—and sent the knife in under the edge of the rib bone, upwards and forwards.

There was a thick sick cough, and the body of the African slid slowly from the bed, his clutching hands letting fall a shower of silver pieces that ran across the room.

There was a deep, painful cough, and the African's body slid slowly off the bed, his grasping hands dropping a cascade of silver coins that scattered across the room.

‘Now I can die!’ said Pambe.

‘Now I can die!’ said Pambe.

But he did not die. He was nursed back to life with all the skill that money could buy, for the Law wanted him; and in the end he grew sufficiently healthy to be hanged in due and proper form.

But he didn’t die. He was brought back to life with all the expertise that money could buy, because the Law wanted him; and in the end, he became healthy enough to be hanged in proper fashion.

Pambe did not care particularly; but it was a sad blow to the kind gentleman.

Pambe didn't really care; but it was a disappointing setback for the kind gentleman.





LITTLE TOBRAH

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

‘Prisoner’s head did not reach to the top of the dock,’ as the English newspapers say. This case, however, was not reported because nobody cared by so much as a hempen rope for the life or death of Little Tobrah. The assessors in the red court-house sat upon him all through the long hot afternoon, and whenever they asked him a question he salaamed and whined. Their verdict was that the evidence was inconclusive, and the Judge concurred. It was true that the dead body of Little Tobrah’s sister had been found at the bottom of the well, and Little Tobrah was the only human being within a half mile radius at the time; but the child might have fallen in by accident. Therefore Little Tobrah was acquitted, and told to go where he pleased. This permission was not so generous as it sounds, for he had nowhere to go to, nothing in particular to eat, and nothing whatever to wear.

‘The prisoner’s head didn’t reach the top of the dock,’ as the English newspapers say. This case, however, wasn’t reported because nobody cared even a little about the life or death of Little Tobrah. The assessors in the red courthouse sat on him all through the long, hot afternoon, and whenever they asked him a question, he bowed and whined. Their verdict was that the evidence was inconclusive, and the Judge agreed. It was true that the dead body of Little Tobrah’s sister had been found at the bottom of the well, and Little Tobrah was the only person within a half-mile radius at the time; but the child might have fallen in by accident. Therefore, Little Tobrah was acquitted and told he could go wherever he wanted. This permission wasn’t as generous as it sounds, because he had nowhere to go, nothing specific to eat, and nothing at all to wear.

He trotted into the court-compound, and sat upon the well-kerb, wondering whether an unsuccessful dive into the black water below would end in a forced voyage across the other Black Water. A groom put down an emptied nose-bag on the bricks, and Little Tobrah, being hungry, set himself to scrape out what wet grain the horse had overlooked.

He walked into the courtyard and sat on the edge of the well, thinking about whether a failed jump into the dark water below would result in an unwanted journey across the other dark water. A stable hand placed an empty feed bag on the bricks, and Little Tobrah, feeling hungry, began to scrape out the leftover wet grain that the horse had missed.

‘O Thief—and but newly set free from the terror of the Law! Come along!’ said the groom, and Little Tobrah was led by the ear to a large and fat Englishman, who heard the tale of the theft.

‘O Thief—and just recently freed from the fear of the Law! Come on!’ said the groom, and Little Tobrah was pulled along by the ear to a large and overweight Englishman, who listened to the story of the theft.

‘Hah!’ said the Englishman three times (only he said a stronger word). ‘Put him into the net and take him home.’ So Little Tobrah was thrown into the net of the cart, and, nothing doubting that he should be stuck like a pig, was driven to the Englishman’s house. ‘Hah!’ said the Englishman as before. ‘Wet grain, by Jove! Feed the little beggar, some of you, and we’ll make a riding-boy of him! See? Wet grain, good Lord!’

‘Ha!’ said the Englishman three times (but he used a stronger word). ‘Put him in the net and take him home.’ So Little Tobrah was tossed into the cart's net, and, not suspecting anything, was taken to the Englishman's house. ‘Ha!’ the Englishman repeated. ‘Wet grain, for heaven's sake! Someone feed the little rascal, and we’ll turn him into a riding-boy! You see? Wet grain, good Lord!’

‘Give an account of yourself,’ said the Head of the Grooms, to Little Tobrah after the meal had been eaten, and the servants lay at ease in their quarters behind the house. ‘You are not of the groom caste, unless it be for the stomach’s sake. How came you into the court, and why? Answer, little devil’s spawn!’

‘Tell me about yourself,’ said the Head of the Grooms to Little Tobrah after everyone had finished eating and the servants were lounging in their quarters behind the house. ‘You aren’t from the groom caste, unless it’s just for the food. How did you end up in the court, and why? Speak up, little troublemaker!’

‘There was not enough to eat,’ said Little Tobrah calmly. ‘This is a good place.’

‘There wasn’t enough to eat,’ said Little Tobrah calmly. ‘This is a nice spot.’

‘Talk straight talk,’ said the Head Groom, ‘or I will make you clean out the stable of that large red stallion who bites like a camel.’

‘Speak plainly,’ said the Head Groom, ‘or I’ll have you clean out the stable of that big red stallion who bites like a camel.’

‘We be Telis, oil-pressers,’ said Little Tobrah, scratching his toes in the dust. ‘We were Telis—my father, my mother, my brother, the elder by four years, myself, and the sister.’

‘We are Telis, oil-pressers,’ said Little Tobrah, scratching his toes in the dust. ‘We were Telis—my father, my mother, my brother, who is four years older than me, and my sister.’

‘She who was found dead in the well?’ said one who had heard something of the trial.

‘Is she the one who was found dead in the well?’ asked someone who had heard a bit about the trial.

‘Even so,’ said Little Tobrah gravely. ‘She who was found dead in the well. It befel upon a time, which is not in my memory, that the sickness came to the village where our oil-press stood, and first my sister was smitten as to her eyes, and went without sight, for it was mata—the smallpox. Thereafter, my father and my mother died of that same sickness, so we were alone—my brother who had twelve years, I who had eight, and the sister who could not see. Yet were there the bullock and the oil-press remaining, and we made shift to press the oil as before. But Surjun Dass, the grain-seller, cheated us in his dealings; and it was always a stubborn bullock to drive. We put marigold flowers for the Gods upon the neck of the bullock, and upon the great grinding-beam that rose through the roof; but we gained nothing thereby, and Surjun Dass was a hard man.’

‘Even so,’ said Little Tobrah seriously. ‘She who was found dead in the well. Once upon a time, which is not in my memory, sickness came to the village where our oil press was, and first my sister was struck blind because of it, as it was smallpox. After that, my mom and dad died from the same illness, so we were left all alone—my brother who was twelve, I who was eight, and the sister who couldn’t see. But we still had the bullock and the oil press, and we managed to press the oil like before. However, Surjun Dass, the grain seller, cheated us in his dealings; and the bullock was always hard to drive. We put marigold flowers for the Gods around the neck of the bullock and on the big grinding beam that stuck out through the roof; but we gained nothing from it, and Surjun Dass was a tough man.'

‘Bapri-bap,’ muttered the grooms’ wives, ‘to cheat a child so! But WE know what the bunnia-folk are, sisters.’

‘Bapri-bap,’ whispered the grooms' wives, ‘to trick a child like that! But WE know what the bunnia folks are like, sisters.’

‘The press was an old press, and we were not strong men—my brother and I; nor could we fix the neck of the beam firmly in the shackle.’

‘The press was an old machine, and my brother and I weren’t strong guys; we also couldn’t secure the neck of the beam tightly in the shackle.’

‘Nay, indeed,’ said the gorgeously-clad wife of the Head Groom, joining the circle. ‘That is a strong man’s work. When I was a maid in my father’s house——’

‘No, really,’ said the beautifully dressed wife of the Head Groom, joining the group. ‘That is the work of a strong man. When I was a maid in my father's house——’

‘Peace, woman,’ said the Head Groom. ‘Go on, boy.’

‘Calm down, lady,’ said the Head Groom. ‘Go ahead, kid.’

‘It is nothing,’ said Little Tobrah. ‘The big beam tore down the roof upon a day which is not in my memory, and with the roof fell much of the hinder wall, and both together upon our bullock, whose back was broken. Thus we had neither home, nor press, nor bullock—my brother, myself, and the sister who was blind. We went crying away from that place, hand-in-hand, across the fields; and our money was seven annas and six pie. There was a famine in the land. I do not know the name of the land. So, on a night when we were sleeping, my brother took the five annas that remained to us and ran away. I do not know whither he went. The curse of my father be upon him. But I and the sister begged food in the villages, and there was none to give. Only all men said—“Go to the Englishmen and they will give.” I did not know what the Englishmen were; but they said that they were white, living in tents. I went forward; but I cannot say whither I went, and there was no more food for myself or the sister. And upon a hot night, she weeping and calling for food, we came to a well, and I bade her sit upon the kerb, and thrust her in, for, in truth, she could not see; and it is better to die than to starve.’

"It’s nothing," said Little Tobrah. "The large beam fell and took down the roof on a day I can’t remember, and with it came a lot of the back wall, all crashing down on our bullock, whose back was broken. So, we lost our home, our crops, and our bullock—just my brother, me, and my blind sister left. We walked away from that place, hand-in-hand, across the fields, crying; we had seven annas and six pie. There was a famine in the land. I don’t even know the name of the place. One night, while we were sleeping, my brother took the five annas we had left and ran away. I don’t know where he went. May our father’s curse be upon him. My sister and I begged for food in the villages, but no one could give us anything. They all said, “Go to the Englishmen, and they will help.” I didn’t know who the Englishmen were; they said they were white people living in tents. I moved forward, but I can't say where I went, and I still had no food for myself or my sister. On a hot night, while she cried and begged for food, we came to a well. I told her to sit on the edge, and then I pushed her in because, honestly, she couldn’t see; and it’s better to die than to starve."

‘Ai! Ahi!’ wailed the grooms’ wives in chorus; ‘he thrust her in, for it is better to die than to starve!’

‘Oh no! Ouch!’ cried the grooms' wives together; ‘he pushed her inside, for it's better to die than to starve!’

‘I would have thrown myself in also, but that she was not dead and called to me from the bottom of the well, and I was afraid and ran. And one came out of the crops saying that I had killed her and defiled the well, and they took me before an Englishman, white and terrible, living in a tent, and me he sent here. But there were no witnesses, and it is better to die than to starve. She, furthermore, could not see with her eyes, and was but a little child.’

‘I would have jumped in too, but she wasn’t dead and called out to me from the bottom of the well, and I got scared and ran away. Then someone came out from the fields saying I had killed her and polluted the well, and they brought me to an Englishman, who was white and frightening, living in a tent, and he sent me here. But there were no witnesses, and it's better to die than to starve. Besides, she couldn’t see with her eyes and was just a little kid.’

‘Was but a little child,’ echoed the Head Groom’s wife. ‘But who art thou, weak as a fowl and small as a day-old colt, what art THOU?’

‘Was just a little kid,’ echoed the Head Groom’s wife. ‘But who are you, weak as a bird and small as a newborn foal, who are YOU?’

‘I who was empty am now full,’ said Little Tobrah, stretching himself upon the dust. ‘And I would sleep.’

‘I who was empty am now full,’ said Little Tobrah, stretching himself out on the ground. ‘And I want to sleep.’

The groom’s wife spread a cloth over him while Little Tobrah slept the sleep of the just.

The groom's wife laid a cloth over him while Little Tobrah slept peacefully.





BUBBLING WELL ROAD

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

Look out on a large scale map the place where the Chenab river falls into the Indus fifteen miles or so above the hamlet of Chachuran. Five miles west of Chachuran lies Bubbling Well Road, and the house of the gosain or priest of Arti-goth. It was the priest who showed me the road, but it is no thanks to him that I am able to tell this story.

Look at a large map and find where the Chenab River merges with the Indus, about fifteen miles north of the village of Chachuran. Five miles west of Chachuran is Bubbling Well Road, along with the home of the priest of Arti-goth. It was the priest who directed me to the road, but I can't credit him for my ability to share this story.

Five miles west of Chachuran is a patch of the plumed jungle-grass, that turns over in silver when the wind blows, from ten to twenty feet high and from three to four miles square. In the heart of the patch hides the gosain of Bubbling Well Road. The villagers stone him when he peers into the daylight, although he is a priest, and he runs back again as a strayed wolf turns into tall crops. He is a one-eyed man and carries, burnt between his brows, the impress of two copper coins. Some say that he was tortured by a native prince in the old days; for he is so old that he must have been capable of mischief in the days of Runjit Singh. His most pressing need at present is a halter, and the care of the British Government.

Five miles west of Chachuran is a patch of tall jungle grass that shimmers silver when the wind blows, standing between ten to twenty feet high and covering three to four square miles. In the center of this patch hides the hermit of Bubbling Well Road. The villagers throw stones at him when he dares to peek into the daylight, even though he’s a priest, and he quickly retreats like a lost wolf into the tall crops. He’s a one-eyed man who bears the mark of two copper coins burned into his forehead. Some say he was tortured by a native prince long ago; he’s so old that he must have been up to mischief during the time of Runjit Singh. Right now, his biggest need is a halter and the support of the British Government.

These things happened when the jungle-grass was tall; and the villagers of Chachuran told me that a sounder of pig had gone into the Arti-goth patch. To enter jungle-grass is always an unwise proceeding, but I went, partly because I knew nothing of pig-hunting, and partly because the villagers said that the big boar of the sounder owned foot long tushes. Therefore I wished to shoot him, in order to produce the tushes in after years, and say that I had ridden him down in fair chase. I took a gun and went into the hot, close patch, believing that it would be an easy thing to unearth one pig in ten square miles of jungle. Mr. Wardle, the terrier, went with me because he believed that I was incapable of existing for an hour without his advice and countenance. He managed to slip in and out between the grass clumps, but I had to force my way, and in twenty minutes was as completely lost as though I had been in the heart of Central Africa. I did not notice this at first till I had grown wearied of stumbling and pushing through the grass, and Mr. Wardle was beginning to sit down very often and hang out his tongue very far. There was nothing but grass everywhere, and it was impossible to see two yards in any direction. The grass-stems held the heat exactly as boiler-tubes do.

These things happened when the jungle grass was tall, and the villagers of Chachuran told me that a group of pigs had gone into the Arti-goth patch. Entering jungle grass is always a risky move, but I went anyway, partly because I didn't know anything about pig hunting, and partly because the villagers said that the big boar of the group had tusks a foot long. So, I wanted to shoot him to keep the tusks as a trophy and brag that I had hunted him fairly. I grabbed a gun and went into the hot, dense area, thinking it would be easy to find one pig in ten square miles of jungle. Mr. Wardle, the terrier, joined me because he thought I couldn't survive for an hour without his help and company. He managed to dart in and out between the clumps of grass, but I had to push my way through, and in twenty minutes I was as lost as if I were in the heart of Central Africa. I didn't realize it at first until I grew tired of stumbling and pushing through the grass, and Mr. Wardle kept sitting down and panting more often. Grass was everywhere, and I couldn't see two yards in any direction. The grass stalks trapped the heat like boiler tubes.

In half-an-hour, when I was devoutly wishing that I had left the big boar alone, I came to a narrow path which seemed to be a compromise between a native foot-path and a pig-run. It was barely six inches wide, but I could sidle along it in comfort. The grass was extremely thick here, and where the path was ill defined it was necessary to crush into the tussocks either with both hands before the face, or to back into it, leaving both hands free to manage the rifle. None the less it was a path, and valuable because it might lead to a place.

In half an hour, as I was wishing I had left the big boar alone, I came across a narrow path that felt like a mix between a local footpath and a pig trail. It was only about six inches wide, but I could make my way along it comfortably. The grass was really thick here, and where the path was unclear, I had to push through the tussocks either with my hands in front of me or back into it, keeping my hands free to handle the rifle. Still, it was a path, and that was important because it might lead to somewhere.

At the end of nearly fifty yards of fair way, just when I was preparing to back into an unusually stiff tussock, I missed Mr. Wardle, who for his girth is an unusually frivolous dog and never keeps to heel. I called him three times and said aloud, ‘Where has the little beast gone to?’ Then I stepped backwards several paces, for almost under my feet a deep voice repeated, ‘Where has the little beast gone?’ To appreciate an unseen voice thoroughly you should hear it when you are lost in stifling jungle-grass. I called Mr. Wardle again and the underground echo assisted me. At that I ceased calling and listened very attentively, because I thought I heard a man laughing in a peculiarly offensive manner. The heat made me sweat, but the laughter made me shake. There is no earthly need for laughter in high grass. It is indecent, as well as impolite. The chuckling stopped, and I took courage and continued to call till I thought that I had located the echo somewhere behind and below the tussock into which I was preparing to back just before I lost Mr. Wardle. I drove my rifle up to the triggers, between the grass-stems in a downward and forward direction. Then I waggled it to and fro, but it did not seem to touch ground on the far side of the tussock as it should have done. Every time that I grunted with the exertion of driving a heavy rifle through thick grass, the grunt was faithfully repeated from below, and when I stopped to wipe my face the sound of low laughter was distinct beyond doubting.

At the end of almost fifty yards of fairway, just as I was getting ready to back into a particularly tough tussock, I realized Mr. Wardle was missing. For his size, he's an unusually playful dog and never stays close. I called him three times and shouted, "Where has that little guy gone?" Then I took a few steps back, and right under my feet, a deep voice echoed, "Where has the little guy gone?" To really appreciate an unseen voice, you should hear it when you're lost in thick jungle grass. I called for Mr. Wardle again, and the echo helped me out. At that point, I stopped calling and listened very carefully because I thought I heard a man laughing in a really annoying way. The heat was making me sweat, but the laughter made me uneasy. There's really no reason for laughter in tall grass. It's inappropriate, not to mention rude. The chuckling stopped, and I gathered my courage and kept calling until I thought I pinpointed the echo somewhere behind and below the tussock I was about to back into just before I lost track of Mr. Wardle. I shoved my rifle into the grass, aiming it down and forward. Then I shook it around, but it didn’t seem to reach the ground on the other side of the tussock as it should have. Every time I grunted from pushing the heavy rifle through the thick grass, the grunt was echoed back from below, and when I paused to wipe my face, the sound of quiet laughter was unmistakable.

I went into the tussock, face first, an inch at a time, my mouth open and my eyes fine, full, and prominent. When I had overcome the resistance of the grass I found that I was looking straight across a black gap in the ground—that I was actually lying on my chest leaning over the mouth of a well so deep I could scarcely see the water in it.

I crawled into the tussock, face first, inch by inch, my mouth open and my eyes wide and alert. Once I pushed through the grass, I realized I was looking directly down into a dark hole in the ground—essentially lying on my stomach, peering over the edge of a well so deep that I could barely make out the water at the bottom.

There were things in the water,—black things,—and the water was as black as pitch with blue scum atop. The laughing sound came from the noise of a little spring, spouting half-way down one side of the well. Sometimes as the black things circled round, the trickle from the spring fell upon their tightly-stretched skins, and then the laughter changed into a sputter of mirth. One thing turned over on its back, as I watched, and drifted round and round the circle of the mossy brickwork with a hand and half an arm held clear of the water in a stiff and horrible flourish, as though it were a very wearied guide paid to exhibit the beauties of the place.

There were things in the water—black things—and the water was pitch black with a blue scum on top. The laughter came from the sound of a small spring bubbling halfway down one side of the well. Sometimes, as the black things swirled around, the trickle from the spring splashed onto their tightly-stretched skins, and then the laughter turned into a sputter of mirth. One thing rolled over onto its back while I watched and drifted in circles around the mossy brickwork with one hand and half an arm held above the water in a stiff and eerie flourish, as if it were a very tired guide showing off the beauty of the place.

I did not spend more than half-an-hour in creeping round that well and finding the path on the other side. The remainder of the journey I accomplished by feeling every foot of ground in front of me, and crawling like a snail through every tussock. I carried Mr. Wardle in my arms and he licked my nose. He was not frightened in the least, nor was I, but we wished to reach open ground in order to enjoy the view. My knees were loose, and the apple in my throat refused to slide up and down. The path on the far side of the well was a very good one, though boxed in on all sides by grass, and it led me in time to a priest’s hut in the centre of a little clearing. When that priest saw my very white face coming through the grass he howled with terror and embraced my boots; but when I reached the bedstead set outside his door I sat down quickly and Mr. Wardle mounted guard over me. I was not in a condition to take care of myself.

I didn't spend more than half an hour sneaking around that well and finding the path on the other side. For the rest of the journey, I felt every inch of ground in front of me and crawled like a snail through every tuft of grass. I carried Mr. Wardle in my arms, and he licked my nose. Neither of us was scared, but we wanted to get to open ground to enjoy the view. My knees felt shaky, and the lump in my throat wouldn’t budge. The path on the other side of the well was really good, although it was surrounded by grass, and it eventually led me to a priest's hut in the middle of a small clearing. When that priest saw my very pale face coming through the grass, he screamed in terror and hugged my boots; but when I reached the bedstead outside his door, I quickly sat down, and Mr. Wardle stood guard over me. I wasn't in a state to look after myself.

When I awoke I told the priest to lead me into the open, out of the Arti-goth patch, and to walk slowly in front of me. Mr. Wardle hates natives, and the priest was more afraid of Mr. Wardle than of me, though we were both angry. He walked very slowly down a narrow little path from his hut. That path crossed three paths, such as the one I had come by in the first instance, and every one of the three headed towards the Bubbling Well. Once when we stopped to draw breath, I heard the Well laughing to itself alone in the thick grass, and only my need for his services prevented my firing both barrels into the priest’s back.

When I woke up, I asked the priest to take me outside, away from the Arti-goth patch, and to walk slowly in front of me. Mr. Wardle dislikes locals, and the priest was more scared of Mr. Wardle than of me, even though we were both upset. He moved slowly down a narrow path from his hut. That path intersected three others, like the one I had taken initially, and each of those three led towards the Bubbling Well. Once we paused to catch our breath, I heard the Well laughing to itself in the thick grass, and my urgent need for the priest's help kept me from shooting him in the back with both barrels.

When we came to the open the priest crashed back into cover, and I went to the village of Arti-goth for a drink. It was pleasant to be able to see the horizon all round, as well as the ground underfoot.

When we got to the open area, the priest ducked back for cover, and I headed to the village of Arti-goth for a drink. It felt good to see the horizon all around, as well as the ground beneath my feet.

The villagers told me that the patch of grass was full of devils and ghosts, all in the service of the priest, and that men and women and children had entered it and had never returned. They said the priest used their livers for purposes of witchcraft. When I asked why they had not told me of this at the outset, they said that they were afraid they would lose their reward for bringing news of the pig.

The villagers told me that the patch of grass was filled with devils and ghosts, all working for the priest, and that men, women, and children had gone in and never come back out. They said the priest used their livers for witchcraft. When I asked why they hadn’t mentioned this earlier, they said they were afraid they would lose their reward for bringing news about the pig.

Before I left I did my best to set the patch alight, but the grass was too green. Some fine summer day, however, if the wind is favourable, a file of old newspapers and a box of matches will make clear the mystery of Bubbling Well Road.

Before I left, I tried my best to set the patch on fire, but the grass was too green. However, on a nice summer day, if the wind is right, a stack of old newspapers and a box of matches will uncover the mystery of Bubbling Well Road.





‘THE CITY OF DREADFUL NIGHT’

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

The dense wet heat that hung over the face of land, like a blanket, prevented all hope of sleep in the first instance. The cicalas helped the heat; and the yelling jackals the cicalas. It was impossible to sit still in the dark, empty, echoing house and watch the punkah beat the dead air. So, at ten o’clock of the night, I set my walking-stick on end in the middle of the garden, and waited to see how it would fall. It pointed directly down the moonlit road that leads to the City of Dreadful Night. The sound of its fall disturbed a hare. She limped from her form and ran across to a disused Mahomedan burial-ground, where the jawless skulls and rough-butted shank-bones, heartlessly exposed by the July rains, glimmered like mother o’ pearl on the rain-channelled soil. The heated air and the heavy earth had driven the very dead upward for coolness’ sake. The hare limped on; snuffed curiously at a fragment of a smoke-stained lamp-shard, and died out, in the shadow of a clump of tamarisk trees.

The thick, humid heat that hung over the land like a blanket completely destroyed any chance of sleep at first. The cicadas added to the heat, and the howling jackals added to the cicadas. It was impossible to sit still in the dark, empty, echoing house and watch the punkah stir the stale air. So, at ten o'clock that night, I stuck my walking-stick upright in the middle of the garden and waited to see which way it would fall. It pointed directly down the moonlit road that leads to the City of Dreadful Night. The sound of it falling startled a hare. She limped from her hiding place and ran across to an abandoned Muslim burial ground, where the jawless skulls and rough, broken bones, heartlessly exposed by the July rains, glimmered like mother of pearl in the rain-washed soil. The heated air and the heavy earth had driven even the dead up toward the surface for some coolness. The hare limped on, curiously sniffing a piece of a smoke-stained lamp shard, then vanished into the shadow of a group of tamarisk trees.

The mat-weaver’s hut under the lee of the Hindu temple was full of sleeping men who lay like sheeted corpses. Overhead blazed the unwinking eye of the Moon. Darkness gives at least a false impression of coolness. It was hard not to believe that the flood of light from above was warm. Not so hot as the Sun, but still sickly warm, and heating the heavy air beyond what was our due. Straight as a bar of polished steel ran the road to the City of Dreadful Night; and on either side of the road lay corpses disposed on beds in fantastic attitudes—one hundred and seventy bodies of men. Some shrouded all in white with bound-up mouths; some naked and black as ebony in the strong light; and one—that lay face upwards with dropped jaw, far away from the others—silvery white and ashen gray.

The mat-weaver's hut beside the Hindu temple was filled with sleeping men who lay like wrapped corpses. Above them, the Moon's unblinking eye shone brightly. Darkness at least creates a misleading sense of coolness. It was hard not to feel that the bright light from above was warm. Not as hot as the Sun, but still uncomfortably warm, making the heavy air feel hotter than it should. The road to the City of Dreadful Night ran straight like a polished steel bar; on either side of the road lay corpses arranged in bizarre positions—one hundred and seventy men. Some were completely shrouded in white with their mouths bound; some were naked and black as ebony in the bright light; and one—lying face up with a dropped jaw, distant from the rest—was silvery white and ashen gray.

‘A leper asleep; and the remainder wearied coolies, servants, small shopkeepers, and drivers from the hackstand hard by. The scene—a main approach to Lahore city, and the night a warm one in August.’ This was all that there was to be seen; but by no means all that one could see. The witchery of the moonlight was everywhere; and the world was horribly changed. The long line of the naked dead, flanked by the rigid silver statue, was not pleasant to look upon. It was made up of men alone. Were the womenkind, then, forced to sleep in the shelter of the stifling mud-huts as best they might? The fretful wail of a child from a low mud-roof answered the question. Where the children are the mothers must be also to look after them. They need care on these sweltering nights. A black little bullet-head peeped over the coping, and a thin—a painfully thin—brown leg was slid over on to the gutter pipe. There was a sharp clink of glass bracelets; a woman’s arm showed for an instant above the parapet, twined itself round the lean little neck, and the child was dragged back, protesting, to the shelter of the bedstead. His thin, high-pitched shriek died out in the thick air almost as soon as it was raised; for even the children of the soil found it too hot to weep.

‘A leper was asleep, along with tired coolies, servants, small shopkeepers, and drivers from the nearby hackstand. The scene was a main approach to Lahore city on a warm August night.’ This was all that could be seen, but it certainly wasn't all that was happening. The enchantment of the moonlight was everywhere, and the world had changed in a disturbing way. The long line of the lifeless dead, flanked by the rigid silver statue, was not a pleasant sight. It was made up entirely of men. Were the women forced to sleep as best they could in the stifling mud huts? The fretful cry of a child from a low mud roof answered that question. Where there are children, their mothers must also be there to take care of them. They need attention on these sweltering nights. A small, dark head peeked over the edge, and a thin—painfully thin—brown leg slid over onto the gutter pipe. There was a sharp clink of glass bracelets; a woman's arm briefly appeared above the parapet, wrapped itself around the little neck, and the child was pulled back, protesting, to the shelter of the bed. His thin, high-pitched scream faded into the thick air almost as soon as it was heard; even the children of the soil found it too hot to cry.

More corpses; more stretches of moonlit, white road, a string of sleeping camels at rest by the wayside; a vision of scudding jackals; ekka-ponies asleep—the harness still on their backs, and the brass-studded country carts, winking in the moonlight—and again more corpses. Wherever a grain cart atilt, a tree trunk, a sawn log, a couple of bamboos and a few handfuls of thatch cast a shadow, the ground is covered with them. They lie—some face downwards, arms folded, in the dust; some with clasped hands flung up above their heads; some curled up dog-wise; some thrown like limp gunny-bags over the side of the grain carts; and some bowed with their brows on their knees in the full glare of the Moon. It would be a comfort if they were only given to snoring; but they are not, and the likeness to corpses is unbroken in all respects save one. The lean dogs snuff at them and turn away. Here and there a tiny child lies on his father’s bedstead, and a protecting arm is thrown round it in every instance. But, for the most part, the children sleep with their mothers on the house-tops. Yellow-skinned white-toothed pariahs are not to be trusted within reach of brown bodies.

More bodies; more stretches of moonlit, white road, a line of sleeping camels resting by the side; a glimpse of darting jackals; ekka ponies asleep—with their harness still on their backs—and the brass-studded country carts glimmering in the moonlight—and again more bodies. Wherever a grain cart is tipped, a tree trunk, a cut log, a couple of bamboo poles, and some handfuls of thatch create a shadow, the ground is filled with them. They lie—some face down, arms folded in the dust; some with their clasped hands thrown up over their heads; some curled up like dogs; some tossed like limp sacks over the sides of the grain carts; and some with their foreheads resting on their knees in the full glare of the moon. It would be reassuring if they could at least snore; but they can't, and the resemblance to corpses holds true in every way except one. The thin dogs sniff at them and walk away. Here and there, a small child is lying on his father's bed, with a protective arm wrapped around him in every case. But mostly, the children sleep with their mothers on the rooftops. Yellow-skinned, white-toothed pariahs can't be trusted near brown bodies.

A stifling hot blast from the mouth of the Delhi Gate nearly ends my resolution of entering the City of Dreadful Night at this hour. It is a compound of all evil savours, animal and vegetable, that a walled city can brew in a day and a night. The temperature within the motionless groves of plantain and orange-trees outside the city walls seems chilly by comparison. Heaven help all sick persons and young children within the city to-night! The high house-walls are still radiating heat savagely, and from obscure side gullies fetid breezes eddy that ought to poison a buffalo. But the buffaloes do not heed. A drove of them are parading the vacant main street; stopping now and then to lay their ponderous muzzles against the closed shutters of a grain-dealer’s shops and to blow thereon like grampuses.

A stifling hot blast from the Delhi Gate almost makes me reconsider entering the City of Dreadful Night at this time. It’s a mix of all the unpleasant smells, both animal and plant, that a walled city can produce in a day and a night. The temperature in the still groves of banana and orange trees outside the city walls feels cool in comparison. God help all sick people and young children in the city tonight! The tall walls of the houses are still radiating heat fiercely, and from dark side alleys, foul breezes swirl that could knock out a buffalo. But the buffaloes don’t care. A group of them is walking down the empty main street, pausing now and then to rest their heavy snouts against the closed shutters of a grain dealer’s shops and blowing on them like whales.

Then silence follows—the silence that is full of the night noises of a great city. A stringed instrument of some kind is just, and only just, audible. High overhead some one throws open a window, and the rattle of the wood-work echoes down the empty street. On one of the roofs, a hookah is in full blast; and the men are talking softly as the pipe gutters. A little farther on, the noise of conversation is more distinct. A slit of light shows itself between the sliding shutters of a shop. Inside, a stubble-bearded, weary-eyed trader is balancing his account-books among the bales of cotton prints that surround him. Three sheeted figures bear him company, and throw in a remark from time to time. First he makes an entry, then a remark; then passes the back of his hand across his streaming forehead. The heat in the built-in street is fearful. Inside the shops it must be almost unendurable. But the work goes on steadily; entry, guttural growl, and uplifted hand-stroke succeeding each other with the precision of clock-work.

Then silence follows—the silence filled with the night sounds of a big city. A string instrument can barely be heard. High above, someone opens a window, and the rattling of the wooden frame echoes down the empty street. On one of the rooftops, a hookah is in full swing; the men are talking softly as the pipe gurgles. A little further along, the sound of conversation becomes clearer. A slit of light appears between the sliding shutters of a shop. Inside, a stubble-bearded, tired-eyed trader is balancing his account books among the bales of cotton prints surrounding him. Three covered figures keep him company, chiming in with comments from time to time. First, he makes an entry, then a comment, and wipes the sweat from his forehead. The heat in the narrow street is intense. Inside the shops, it must be nearly unbearable. But the work continues steadily; entry, guttural growl, and raised hand-stroke follow one another with the precision of clockwork.

A policeman—turbanless and fast asleep—lies across the road on the way to the Mosque of Wazir Khan. A bar of moonlight falls across the forehead and eyes of the sleeper, but he never stirs. It is close upon midnight, and the heat seems to be increasing. The open square in front of the Mosque is crowded with corpses; and a man must pick his way carefully for fear of treading on them. The moonlight stripes the Mosque’s high front of coloured enamel work in broad diagonal bands; and each separate dreaming pigeon in the niches and corners of the masonry throws a squab little shadow. Sheeted ghosts rise up wearily from their pallets, and flit into the dark depths of the building. Is it possible to climb to the top of the great Minars, and thence to look down on the city? At all events the attempt is worth making, and the chances are that the door of the staircase will be unlocked. Unlocked it is; but a deeply sleeping janitor lies across the threshold, face turned to the Moon. A rat dashes out of his turban at the sound of approaching footsteps. The man grunts, opens his eyes for a minute, turns round, and goes to sleep again. All the heat of a decade of fierce Indian summers is stored in the pitch-black, polished walls of the corkscrew staircase. Half-way up, there is something alive, warm, and feathery; and it snores. Driven from step to step as it catches the sound of my advance, it flutters to the top and reveals itself as a yellow-eyed, angry kite. Dozens of kites are asleep on this and the other Minars, and on the domes below. There is the shadow of a cool, or at least a less sultry breeze at this height; and, refreshed thereby, turn to look on the City of Dreadful Night.

A policeman—without a turban and fast asleep—lies across the road on the way to the Mosque of Wazir Khan. A bar of moonlight falls across his forehead and eyes, but he never stirs. It's nearly midnight, and the heat seems to be rising. The open square in front of the Mosque is crowded with bodies; a person has to pick their way carefully for fear of stepping on them. The moonlight streaks the Mosque's tall front with colorful enamel work in broad diagonal bands, and each dreaming pigeon in the niches and corners casts a small shadow. Sheet-covered figures rise wearily from their makeshift beds and drift into the dark depths of the building. Is it possible to climb to the top of the great Minars and look down on the city from there? At the very least, it's worth a try, and chances are the stairway door will be unlocked. It is indeed unlocked, but a deeply sleeping janitor lies across the threshold, face turned to the Moon. A rat scurries out from his turban at the sound of approaching footsteps. The man grunts, opens his eyes for a moment, turns around, and falls asleep again. All the heat of a decade of harsh Indian summers is trapped in the polished, pitch-black walls of the corkscrew staircase. Halfway up, there's something alive, warm, and feathery that snores. As it hears my approach, it flutters up to the top, revealing itself to be a yellow-eyed, angry kite. Dozens of kites are asleep on this and the other Minars, as well as on the domes below. There’s a hint of a cool, or at least less oppressive, breeze at this height; and, feeling refreshed, I turn to gaze upon the City of Dreadful Night.

Dore might have drawn it! Zola could describe it—this spectacle of sleeping thousands in the moonlight and in the shadow of the Moon. The roof-tops are crammed with men, women, and children; and the air is full of undistinguishable noises. They are restless in the City of Dreadful Night; and small wonder. The marvel is that they can even breathe. If you gaze intently at the multitude, you can see that they are almost as uneasy as a daylight crowd; but the tumult is subdued. Everywhere, in the strong light, you can watch the sleepers turning to and fro; shifting their beds and again resettling them. In the pit-like court-yards of the houses there is the same movement.

Dore might have illustrated it! Zola could describe it—this scene of thousands sleeping under the moonlight and in the shadow of the Moon. The rooftops are packed with men, women, and children; and the air is filled with indistinct noises. They are restless in the City of Dreadful Night; and it's no surprise. The incredible thing is that they can even breathe. If you look closely at the crowd, you can see they are nearly as uneasy as a daytime crowd; but the noise is hushed. Everywhere, in the bright light, you can watch the sleepers turning over and over; shifting their bedding and settling back in. In the deep courtyards of the houses, there's the same activity.

The pitiless Moon shows it all. Shows, too, the plains outside the city, and here and there a hand’s-breadth of the Ravee without the walls. Shows lastly, a splash of glittering silver on a house-top almost directly below the mosque Minar. Some poor soul has risen to throw a jar of water over his fevered body; the tinkle of the falling water strikes faintly on the ear. Two or three other men, in far-off corners of the City of Dreadful Night, follow his example, and the water flashes like heliographic signals. A small cloud passes over the face of the Moon, and the city and its inhabitants—clear drawn in black and white before—fade into masses of black and deeper black. Still the unrestful noise continues, the sigh of a great city overwhelmed with the heat, and of a people seeking in vain for rest. It is only the lower-class women who sleep on the house-tops. What must the torment be in the latticed zenanas, where a few lamps are still twinkling? There are footfalls in the court below. It is the Muezzin—faithful minister; but he ought to have been here an hour ago to tell the Faithful that prayer is better than sleep—the sleep that will not come to the city.

The unforgiving Moon reveals everything. It also shows the fields outside the city, and here and there a glimpse of the Ravee River beyond the walls. Lastly, it highlights a shimmer of silver on a rooftop almost directly below the mosque's minaret. A poor soul has gotten up to splash water on his feverish body; the gentle sound of the falling water barely reaches the ear. Two or three other men, in distant corners of the City of Dreadful Night, imitate him, and the water sparkles like signal flares. A small cloud drifts over the Moon's face, and the city and its people—which were clearly outlined in black and white—fade into shades of black and deeper black. Still, the restless noise persists, the sigh of a huge city suffering from the heat, and a people desperately seeking solace. Only the lower-class women sleep on the rooftops. What must the torment be like in the latticed zenanas, where a few lamps are still flickering? There are footsteps in the courtyard below. It’s the Muezzin—faithful servant; but he should have been here an hour ago to remind the Faithful that prayer is better than sleep—the sleep that won't come to the city.

The Muezzin fumbles for a moment with the door of one of the Minars, disappears awhile, and a bull-like roar—a magnificent bass thunder—tells that he has reached the top of the Minar. They must hear the cry to the banks of the shrunken Ravee itself! Even across the courtyard it is almost overpowering. The cloud drifts by and shows him outlined in black against the sky, hands laid upon his ears, and broad chest heaving with the play of his lungs—‘Allah ho Akbar’; then a pause while another Muezzin somewhere in the direction of the Golden Temple takes up the call—‘Allah ho Akbar.’ Again and again; four times in all; and from the bedsteads a dozen men have risen up already.—‘I bear witness that there is no God but God.’ What a splendid cry it is, the proclamation of the creed that brings men out of their beds by scores at midnight! Once again he thunders through the same phrase, shaking with the vehemence of his own voice; and then, far and near, the night air rings with ‘Mahomed is the Prophet of God.’ It is as though he were flinging his defiance to the far-off horizon, where the summer lightning plays and leaps like a bared sword. Every Muezzin in the city is in full cry, and some men on the roof-tops are beginning to kneel. A long pause precedes the last cry, ‘La ilaha Illallah,’ and the silence closes up on it, as the ram on the head of a cotton-bale.

The Muezzin fumbles for a moment with the door of one of the Minarets, disappears for a bit, and a deep, powerful roar—a magnificent bass thunder—signals that he has made it to the top of the Minaret. They must hear his call across the banks of the dwindling Ravee itself! Even from the courtyard, it’s nearly overwhelming. A cloud drifts by, revealing him outlined in black against the sky, hands pressed against his ears, and his broad chest heaving with the effort—‘Allah ho Akbar’; then a pause while another Muezzin somewhere toward the Golden Temple picks up the call—‘Allah ho Akbar.’ Again and again; four times total; and from the beds, a dozen men have already risen. —‘I bear witness that there is no God but God.’ What a majestic call it is, the declaration of faith that brings men out of their beds by the dozens at midnight! He thunders through the same phrase once more, shaking with the intensity of his own voice; and then, far and wide, the night air resonates with ‘Mahomed is the Prophet of God.’ It feels as if he’s challenging the distant horizon, where summer lightning flashes and leaps like a drawn sword. Every Muezzin in the city is in full voice, and some men on the rooftops are starting to kneel. A long pause precedes the final cry, ‘La ilaha Illallah,’ and the silence envelops it, like the ram on top of a cotton bale.

The Muezzin stumbles down the dark stairway grumbling in his beard. He passes the arch of the entrance and disappears. Then the stifling silence settles down over the City of Dreadful Night. The kites on the Minar sleep again, snoring more loudly, the hot breeze comes up in puffs and lazy eddies, and the Moon slides down towards the horizon. Seated with both elbows on the parapet of the tower, one can watch and wonder over that heat-tortured hive till the dawn. ‘How do they live down there? What do they think of? When will they awake?’ More tinkling of sluiced water-pots; faint jarring of wooden bedsteads moved into or out of the shadows; uncouth music of stringed instruments softened by distance into a plaintive wail, and one low grumble of far-off thunder. In the courtyard of the mosque the janitor, who lay across the threshold of the Minar when I came up, starts wildly in his sleep, throws his hands above his head, mutters something, and falls back again. Lulled by the snoring of the kites—they snore like over-gorged humans—I drop off into an uneasy doze, conscious that three o’clock has struck, and that there is a slight—a very slight—coolness in the atmosphere. The city is absolutely quiet now, but for some vagrant dog’s love-song. Nothing save dead heavy sleep.

The Muezzin stumbles down the dark staircase, grumbling to himself. He passes through the entrance arch and disappears. Then, a stifling silence blankets the City of Dreadful Night. The kites on the Minar sleep once more, snoring loudly, while the hot breeze drifts in puffs and lazy swirls, and the Moon sinks down toward the horizon. Sitting with both elbows on the tower's parapet, you can watch and wonder about that heat-tortured hive until dawn. ‘How do they live down there? What do they think about? When will they wake up?’ There’s more tinkling of splashing water pots; faint scraping of wooden beds being moved in and out of the shadows; clumsy music from stringed instruments softened by distance into a mournful wail, and one distant rumble of thunder. In the mosque courtyard, the janitor, who was lying across the threshold of the Minar when I arrived, jolts awake, throws his hands above his head, mutters something, and falls back asleep. Lulled by the snoring of the kites—they snore like overstuffed humans—I drift into an uneasy doze, aware that it’s three o'clock and that there’s a slight—a very slight—coolness in the air. The city is completely quiet now, except for the stray dog’s love song. Nothing but heavy, deep sleep.

Several weeks of darkness pass after this. For the Moon has gone out. The very dogs are still, and I watch for the first light of the dawn before making my way homeward. Again the noise of shuffling feet. The morning call is about to begin, and my night watch is over. ‘Allah ho Akbar! Allah ho Akbar!’ The east grows gray, and presently saffron; the dawn wind comes up as though the Muezzin had summoned it; and, as one man, the City of Dreadful Night rises from its bed and turns its face towards the dawning day. With return of life comes return of sound. First a low whisper, then a deep bass hum; for it must be remembered that the entire city is on the house-tops. My eyelids weighed down with the arrears of long deferred sleep, I escape from the Minar through the courtyard and out into the square beyond, where the sleepers have risen, stowed away the bedsteads, and are discussing the morning hookah. The minute’s freshness of the air has gone, and it is as hot as at first.

Several weeks of darkness go by after this. The Moon has disappeared. Even the dogs are quiet, and I wait for the first light of dawn before heading home. Again, I hear the shuffle of feet. The morning call is about to start, and my night watch is ending. ‘Allah ho Akbar! Allah ho Akbar!’ The east turns gray, then saffron; the dawn wind picks up as if the Muezzin had called for it, and, as if awakened, the City of Dreadful Night rises from its slumber and faces the new day. With the return of life comes sound. First a low whisper, then a deep hum; it’s important to remember that the entire city is on the rooftops. My eyelids heavy from lack of sleep, I slip out of the Minar through the courtyard and into the square beyond, where the sleepers have gotten up, put away their beds, and are chatting over morning hookah. The fresh air of the minute is gone, and it’s as hot as before.

‘Will the Sahib, out of his kindness, make room?’ What is it? Something borne on men’s shoulders comes by in the half-light, and I stand back. A woman’s corpse going down to the burning-ghat, and a bystander says, ‘She died at midnight from the heat.’ So the city was of Death as well as Night after all.

‘Will the Sahib, out of his kindness, make room?’ What is it? Something carried on men’s shoulders comes by in the dim light, and I step back. A woman’s corpse being taken to the cremation ground, and a bystander says, ‘She died at midnight from the heat.’ So the city was about Death as well as Night after all.





GEORGIE PORGIE

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

     Georgie Porgie, pudding and pie,
     Kissed the girls and made them cry.
     When the girls came out to play
     Georgie Porgie ran away.
     Georgie Porgie, pudding and pie,  
     Kissed the girls and made them cry.  
     When the girls came out to play  
     Georgie Porgie ran away.  

If you will admit that a man has no right to enter his drawing-room early in the morning, when the housemaid is setting things right and clearing away the dust, you will concede that civilised people who eat out of china and own card-cases have no right to apply their standard of right and wrong to an unsettled land. When the place is made fit for their reception, by those men who are told off to the work, they can come up, bringing in their trunks their own society and the Decalogue, and all the other apparatus. Where the Queen’s Law does not carry, it is irrational to expect an observance of other and weaker rules. The men who run ahead of the cars of Decency and Propriety, and make the jungle ways straight, cannot be judged in the same manner as the stay-at-home folk of the ranks of the regular Tchin.

If you agree that a man shouldn't stroll into his living room early in the morning while the housekeeper tidies up and dusts, then you'll also accept that civilized people who eat off fine china and have nice cardholders shouldn’t impose their sense of right and wrong on an uncharted land. Once the area is prepared for their arrival by those assigned to the task, they can then come along, bringing their luggage, their own social norms, and the Ten Commandments, along with everything else they consider essential. Where the Queen’s Law doesn’t apply, it’s unreasonable to expect adherence to other, less established rules. The people who pave the way for Decency and Propriety and straightening the paths through the wilderness can’t be judged in the same way as those who stay behind among the regular folks of Tchin.

Not many months ago the Queen’s Law stopped a few miles north of Thayetmyo on the Irrawaddy. There was no very strong Public Opinion up to that limit, but it existed to keep men in order. When the Government said that the Queen’s Law must carry up to Bhamo and the Chinese border the order was given, and some men whose desire was to be ever a little in advance of the rush of Respectability flocked forward with the troops. These were the men who could never pass examinations, and would have been too pronounced in their ideas for the administration of bureau-worked Provinces. The Supreme Government stepped in as soon as might be, with codes and regulations, and all but reduced New Burma to the dead Indian level; but there was a short time during which strong men were necessary and ploughed a field for themselves.

Not long ago, the Queen’s Law only extended a few miles north of Thayetmyo along the Irrawaddy. There wasn't a strong Public Opinion beyond that point, but it was enough to keep people in line. When the Government announced that the Queen’s Law needed to reach Bhamo and the Chinese border, the order was given, and some individuals who always wanted to stay ahead of the wave of Respectability rushed to join the troops. These were the people who could never pass exams and would have been too outspoken for the management of bureaucratically run Provinces. The Supreme Government intervened as quickly as possible with codes and regulations, nearly reducing New Burma to a stagnant state similar to India; however, there was a brief period when strong individuals were needed and carved out their own space.

Among the fore-runners of Civilisation was Georgie Porgie, reckoned by all who knew him a strong man. He held an appointment in Lower Burma when the order came to break the Frontier, and his friends called him Georgie Porgie because of the singularly Burmese-like manner in which he sang a song whose first line is something like the words ‘Georgie Porgie.’ Most men who have been in Burma will know the song. It means: ‘Puff, puff, puff, puff, great steamboat!’ Georgie sang it to his banjo, and his friends shouted with delight, so that you could hear them far away in the teak-forest.

Among the pioneers of civilization was Georgie Porgie, regarded by everyone who knew him as a strong man. He had a job in Lower Burma when the order came to push forward the Frontier, and his friends called him Georgie Porgie because of the uniquely Burmese-style way he sang a song whose first line is something like the words ‘Georgie Porgie.’ Most people who have been in Burma will recognize the song. It means: ‘Puff, puff, puff, puff, great steamboat!’ Georgie performed it on his banjo, and his friends cheered with joy, so loud you could hear them from far away in the teak forest.

When he went to Upper Burma he had no special regard for God or Man, but he knew how to make himself respected, and to carry out the mixed Military-Civil duties that fell to most men’s share in those months. He did his office work and entertained, now and again, the detachments of fever-shaken soldiers who blundered through his part of the world in search of a flying party of dacoits. Sometimes he turned out and dressed down dacoits on his own account; for the country was still smouldering and would blaze when least expected. He enjoyed these charivaris, but the dacoits were not so amused. All the officials who came in contact with him departed with the idea that Georgie Porgie was a valuable person, well able to take care of himself, and, on that belief, he was left to his own devices.

When he went to Upper Burma, he didn’t care much about God or people, but he knew how to earn respect and handle the mixed military and civil duties that most men dealt with during those months. He did his office work and occasionally entertained groups of fever-stricken soldiers who wandered through his area looking for a group of dacoits. Sometimes, he even went out and dealt with dacoits on his own; the country was still smoldering and could erupt into chaos at any moment. He enjoyed these adventures, but the dacoits didn’t share his enthusiasm. All the officials who interacted with him left believing that Georgie Porgie was a valuable person who could take care of himself, and based on that belief, he was allowed to operate independently.

At the end of a few months he wearied of his solitude, and cast about for company and refinement. The Queen’s Law had hardly begun to be felt in the country, and Public Opinion, which is more powerful than the Queen’s Law, had yet to come. Also, there was a custom in the country which allowed a white man to take to himself a wife of the Daughters of Heth upon due payment. The marriage was not quite so binding as is the nikkah ceremony among Mahomedans, but the wife was very pleasant.

After a few months, he got tired of being alone and looked for companionship and sophistication. The Queen’s Law was just starting to have an impact in the country, and Public Opinion, which is stronger than the Queen’s Law, hadn’t arrived yet. Additionally, there was a local custom that allowed a white man to marry a woman from the Daughters of Heth after making the proper payment. This marriage wasn’t as formal as the nikkah ceremony in Islam, but the wife was quite enjoyable.

When all our troops are back from Burma there will be a proverb in their mouths, ‘As thrifty as a Burmese wife,’ and pretty English ladies will wonder what in the world it means.

When all our troops return from Burma, there will be a saying among them, ‘As thrifty as a Burmese wife,’ and curious English ladies will wonder what it means.

The headman of the village next to Georgie Porgie’s post had a fair daughter who had seen Georgie Porgie and loved him from afar. When news went abroad that the Englishman with the heavy hand who lived in the stockade was looking for a housekeeper, the headman came in and explained that, for five hundred rupees down, he would entrust his daughter to Georgie Porgie’s keeping, to be maintained in all honour, respect, and comfort, with pretty dresses, according to the custom of the country. This thing was done, and Georgie Porgie never repented it.

The leader of the village next to Georgie Porgie's place had a beautiful daughter who had seen Georgie Porgie and admired him from a distance. When word spread that the Englishman with the strong hand living in the stockade was searching for a housekeeper, the leader came and offered his daughter to Georgie Porgie for five hundred rupees upfront. He promised that she would be treated with honor, respect, and comfort, with lovely dresses, according to local customs. This arrangement was made, and Georgie Porgie never regretted it.

He found his rough-and-tumble house put straight and made comfortable, his hitherto unchecked expenses cut down by one half, and himself petted and made much of by his new acquisition, who sat at the head of his table and sang songs to him and ordered his Madrassee servants about, and was in every way as sweet and merry and honest and winning a little woman as the most exacting of bachelors could have desired. No race, men say who know, produces such good wives and heads of households as the Burmese. When the next detachment tramped by on the war-path the Subaltern in Command found at Georgie Porgie’s table a hostess to be deferential to, a woman to be treated in every way as one occupying an assured position. When he gathered his men together next dawn and replunged into the jungle he thought regretfully of the nice little dinner and the pretty face, and envied Georgie Porgie from the bottom of his heart. Yet HE was engaged to a girl at Home, and that is how some men are constructed.

He found his messy house tidied up and made comfortable, his previously unchecked expenses cut in half, and himself pampered and adored by his new companion, who sat at the head of his table, sang songs to him, gave orders to his Madrassee servants, and was, in every way, as sweet, joyful, honest, and charming a woman as any picky bachelor could wish for. People who know say that no race produces better wives and heads of households than the Burmese. When the next detachment marched by on the warpath, the Subaltern in Command found a hostess at Georgie Porgie's table who deserved respect, a woman to be treated as someone with a secure position. As he gathered his men the next morning and plunged back into the jungle, he thought wistfully of the nice little dinner and the pretty face, and he envied Georgie Porgie with all his heart. Yet HE was engaged to a girl back home, and that's just how some men are wired.

The Burmese girl’s name was not a pretty one; but as she was promptly christened Georgina by Georgie Porgie, the blemish did not matter. Georgie Porgie thought well of the petting and the general comfort, and vowed that he had never spent five hundred rupees to a better end.

The Burmese girl’s name wasn’t a pretty one, but since Georgie Porgie quickly named her Georgina, it didn’t matter. Georgie Porgie appreciated the affection and the overall comfort and declared that he had never spent five hundred rupees more wisely.

After three months of domestic life, a great idea struck him. Matrimony—English matrimony—could not be such a bad thing after all. If he were so thoroughly comfortable at the Back of Beyond with this Burmese girl who smoked cheroots, how much more comfortable would he be with a sweet English maiden who would not smoke cheroots, and would play upon a piano instead of a banjo? Also he had a desire to return to his kind, to hear a Band once more, and to feel how it felt to wear a dress-suit again. Decidedly, Matrimony would be a very good thing. He thought the matter out at length of evenings, while Georgina sang to him, or asked him why he was so silent, and whether she had done anything to offend him. As he thought, he smoked, and as he smoked he looked at Georgina, and in his fancy turned her into a fair, thrifty, amusing, merry, little English girl, with hair coming low down on her forehead, and perhaps a cigarette between her lips. Certainly, not a big, thick, Burma cheroot, of the brand that Georgina smoked. He would wed a girl with Georgina’s eyes and most of her ways. But not all. She could be improved upon. Then he blew thick smoke-wreaths through his nostrils and stretched himself. He would taste marriage. Georgina had helped him to save money, and there were six months’ leave due to him.

After three months of domestic life, a great idea popped into his head. Matrimony—English matrimony—might not be such a bad thing after all. If he felt so comfortable in the middle of nowhere with this Burmese girl who smoked cheroots, how much more comfortable would he be with a sweet English lady who wouldn’t smoke cheroots and would play the piano instead of a banjo? He also wanted to return to his own people, to hear a band again, and experience wearing a suit once more. Clearly, matrimony could be very pleasant. He thought about it at length in the evenings, while Georgina sang to him or asked him why he was so quiet, and if she had done anything to upset him. As he pondered, he smoked, and while smoking, he looked at Georgina and imagined her as a lovely, clever, fun, little English girl with hair styled low on her forehead, and maybe a cigarette between her lips. Definitely not a big, thick Burma cheroot like the ones Georgina smoked. He would marry a girl with Georgina’s eyes and most of her personality. But not all of it. She could be improved. Then he blew thick smoke rings through his nostrils and stretched himself. He would give marriage a try. Georgina had helped him save money, and he had six months of leave coming to him.

‘See here, little woman,’ he said, ‘we must put by more money for these next three months. I want it.’ That was a direct slur on Georgina’s housekeeping; for she prided herself on her thrift; but since her God wanted money she would do her best.

‘Listen, little lady,’ he said, ‘we need to save more money for the next three months. I want it.’ That was a direct jab at Georgina’s ability to manage the household; she took pride in her frugality, but since her God wanted money, she would do her best.

‘You want money?’ she said with a little laugh. ‘I HAVE money. Look!’ She ran to her own room and fetched out a small bag of rupees. ‘Of all that you give me, I keep back some. See! One hundred and seven rupees. Can you want more money than that? Take it. It is my pleasure if you use it.’ She spread out the money on the table and pushed it towards him, with her quick, little, pale yellow fingers.

‘You want money?’ she said with a small laugh. ‘I have money. Look!’ She ran to her room and brought back a small bag of rupees. ‘Of all that you give me, I set aside some. See! One hundred and seven rupees. Can you want more than that? Take it. I’m happy if you use it.’ She spread the money out on the table and slid it toward him with her quick, little, pale yellow fingers.

Georgie Porgie never referred to economy in the household again.

Georgie Porgie never talked about saving money in the house again.

Three months later, after the dispatch and receipt of several mysterious letters which Georgina could not understand, and hated for that reason, Georgie Porgie said that he was going away and she must return to her father’s house and stay there.

Three months later, after sending and receiving several mysterious letters that Georgina couldn't understand and therefore disliked, Georgie Porgie announced that he was leaving and that she had to go back to her father's house and stay there.

Georgina wept. She would go with her God from the world’s end to the world’s end. Why should she leave him? She loved him.

Georgina cried. She would go with her God from one end of the world to the other. Why should she leave him? She loved him.

‘I am only going to Rangoon,’ said Georgie Porgie. ‘I shall be back in a month, but it is safer to stay with your father. I will leave you two hundred rupees.’

‘I’m only going to Rangoon,’ said Georgie Porgie. ‘I’ll be back in a month, but it’s safer for you to stay with your father. I’ll leave you two hundred rupees.’

‘If you go for a month, what need of two hundred? Fifty are more than enough. There is some evil here. Do not go, or at least let me go with you.’

‘If you’re going to be gone for a month, why do you need two hundred? Fifty is more than enough. Something isn’t right here. Don’t go, or at least let me come with you.’

Georgie Porgie does not like to remember that scene even at this date. In the end he got rid of Georgina by a compromise of seventy-five rupees. She would not take more. Then he went by steamer and rail to Rangoon.

Georgie Porgie doesn't like to think about that scene even now. In the end, he got rid of Georgina for a settlement of seventy-five rupees. She wouldn't accept any more. Then he traveled by steamer and train to Rangoon.

The mysterious letters had granted him six months’ leave. The actual flight and an idea that he might have been treacherous hurt severely at the time, but as soon as the big steamer was well out into the blue, things were easier, and Georgina’s face, and the queer little stockaded house, and the memory of the rushes of shouting dacoits by night, the cry and struggle of the first man that he had ever killed with his own hand, and a hundred other more intimate things, faded and faded out of Georgie Porgie’s heart, and the vision of approaching England took its place. The steamer was full of men on leave, all rampantly jovial souls who had shaken off the dust and sweat of Upper Burma and were as merry as schoolboys. They helped Georgie Porgie to forget.

The mysterious letters had given him six months off. The actual flight and the thought that he might have been disloyal hurt him a lot at that moment, but once the big ship was well out at sea, everything got easier. Georgina’s face, the strange little stockaded house, the memories of the rushes of shouting bandits at night, the cry and struggle of the first man he had ever killed himself, and a hundred other more personal things faded away from Georgie Porgie’s heart, replaced by the vision of England on the horizon. The steamer was packed with men on leave, all joyful souls who had shaken off the dust and sweat of Upper Burma and were as cheerful as schoolboys. They helped Georgie Porgie forget.

Then came England with its luxuries and decencies and comforts, and Georgie Porgie walked in a pleasant dream upon pavements of which he had nearly forgotten the ring, wondering why men in their senses ever left Town. He accepted his keen delight in his furlough as the reward of his services. Providence further arranged for him another and greater delight—all the pleasures of a quiet English wooing, quite different from the brazen businesses of the East, when half the community stand back and bet on the result, and the other half wonder what Mrs. So-and-So will say to it.

Then England arrived with its luxuries, comforts, and decency, and Georgie Porgie strolled through a pleasant dream on pavements he had almost forgotten the feel of, wondering why sane people ever left the city. He embraced his joy during his break as a reward for his service. Fate also set him up for another, even greater joy—all the pleasures of a quiet English romance, completely different from the loud affairs of the East, where half the community bets on the outcome while the other half wonders what Mrs. So-and-So will think about it.

It was a pleasant girl and a perfect summer, and a big country-house near Petworth where there are acres and acres of purple heather and high-grassed water-meadows to wander through. Georgie Porgie felt that he had at last found something worth the living for, and naturally assumed that the next thing to do was to ask the girl to share his life in India. She, in her ignorance, was willing to go. On this occasion there was no bartering with a village headman. There was a fine middle-class wedding in the country, with a stout Papa and a weeping Mamma, and a best-man in purple and fine linen, and six snub-nosed girls from the Sunday School to throw roses on the path between the tombstones up to the Church door. The local paper described the affair at great length, even down to giving the hymns in full. But that was because the Direction were starving for want of material.

It was a lovely girl and a perfect summer, and a large country house near Petworth with acres and acres of purple heather and grassy water meadows to explore. Georgie Porgie felt he had finally found something worth living for and naturally assumed that the next step was to ask the girl to share his life in India. She, in her innocence, was willing to go. This time, there was no negotiating with a village headman. There was a beautiful middle-class wedding in the countryside, with a plump dad and a crying mom, a best man in purple and fine linen, and six chubby-faced girls from Sunday School tossing roses along the path between the tombstones to the church door. The local paper covered the event in detail, even including the full hymns. But that was just because the editors were desperate for content.

Then came a honeymoon at Arundel, and the Mamma wept copiously before she allowed her one daughter to sail away to India under the care of Georgie Porgie the Bridegroom. Beyond any question, Georgie Porgie was immensely fond of his wife, and she was devoted to him as the best and greatest man in the world. When he reported himself at Bombay he felt justified in demanding a good station for his wife’s sake; and, because he had made a little mark in Burma and was beginning to be appreciated, they allowed him nearly all that he asked for, and posted him to a station which we will call Sutrain. It stood upon several hills, and was styled officially a ‘Sanitarium,’ for the good reason that the drainage was utterly neglected. Here Georgie Porgie settled down, and found married life come very naturally to him. He did not rave, as do many bridegrooms, over the strangeness and delight of seeing his own true love sitting down to breakfast with him every morning ‘as though it were the most natural thing in the world.’

Then there was a honeymoon in Arundel, and the mom cried a lot before she let her only daughter sail away to India with Georgie Porgie the Groom. Without a doubt, Georgie Porgie was very much in love with his wife, and she adored him as the best and greatest man in the world. When he arrived in Bombay, he felt he had every right to request a good position for his wife’s sake; and since he had made a bit of a name for himself in Burma and was starting to be recognized, they granted him almost everything he asked for and assigned him to a place we’ll call Sutrain. It was located on several hills and was officially referred to as a ‘Sanitarium,’ for the simple reason that the drainage was completely ignored. Here, Georgie Porgie settled in and found married life came very easily to him. He didn’t get all worked up, as many grooms do, over the novelty and joy of seeing his true love sitting down to breakfast with him every morning ‘as if it were the most natural thing in the world.’

‘He had been there before,’ as the Americans say, and, checking the merits of his own present Grace by those of Georgina, he was more and more inclined to think that he had done well.

‘He had been there before,’ as the Americans say, and, checking the merits of his current Grace against those of Georgina, he was increasingly convinced that he had made a good choice.

But there was no peace or comfort across the Bay of Bengal, under the teak-trees where Georgina lived with her father, waiting for Georgie Porgie to return. The headman was old, and remembered the war of ‘51. He had been to Rangoon, and knew something of the ways of the Kullahs. Sitting in front of his door in the evenings, he taught Georgina a dry philosophy which did not console her in the least.

But there was no peace or comfort across the Bay of Bengal, under the teak trees where Georgina lived with her father, waiting for Georgie Porgie to come back. The headman was old and remembered the war of '51. He had been to Rangoon and knew a bit about the ways of the Kullahs. Sitting in front of his door in the evenings, he taught Georgina a dry philosophy that didn’t comfort her at all.

The trouble was that she loved Georgie Porgie just as much as the French girl in the English History books loved the priest whose head was broken by the king’s bullies. One day she disappeared from the village with all the rupees that Georgie Porgie had given her, and a very small smattering of English—also gained from Georgie Porgie.

The problem was that she loved Georgie Porgie just as much as the French girl in the English history books loved the priest whose head was smashed by the king’s bullies. One day she vanished from the village with all the rupees that Georgie Porgie had given her, and a very limited grasp of English—also picked up from Georgie Porgie.

The headman was angry at first, but lit a fresh cheroot and said something uncomplimentary about the sex in general. Georgina had started on a search for Georgie Porgie, who might be in Rangoon, or across the Black Water, or dead, for aught that she knew. Chance favoured her. An old Sikh policeman told her that Georgie Porgie had crossed the Black Water. She took a steerage-passage from Rangoon and went to Calcutta; keeping the secret of her search to herself.

The leader was upset at first, but he lit a new cigar and made a rude remark about women in general. Georgina had begun looking for Georgie Porgie, who could be in Rangoon, across the river, or even dead, for all she knew. Luck was on her side. An old Sikh policeman told her that Georgie Porgie had crossed the river. She booked a steerage ticket from Rangoon to Calcutta, keeping her search a secret.

In India every trace of her was lost for six weeks, and no one knows what trouble of heart she must have undergone.

In India, every sign of her disappeared for six weeks, and no one knows what emotional turmoil she must have experienced.

She reappeared, four hundred miles north of Calcutta, steadily heading northwards, very worn and haggard, but very fixed in her determination to find Georgie Porgie. She could not understand the language of the people; but India is infinitely charitable, and the women-folk along the Grand Trunk gave her food. Something made her believe that Georgie Porgie was to be found at the end of that pitiless road. She may have seen a sepoy who knew him in Burma, but of this no one can be certain. At last, she found a regiment on the line of march, and met there one of the many subalterns whom Georgie Porgie had invited to dinner in the far-off, old days of the dacoit-hunting. There was a certain amount of amusement among the tents when Georgina threw herself at the man’s feet and began to cry. There was no amusement when her story was told; but a collection was made, and that was more to the point. One of the subalterns knew of Georgie Porgie’s whereabouts, but not of his marriage. So he told Georgina and she went her way joyfully to the north, in a railway carriage where there was rest for tired feet and shade for a dusty little head. The marches from the train through the hills into Sutrain were trying, but Georgina had money, and families journeying in bullock-carts gave her help. It was an almost miraculous journey, and Georgina felt sure that the good spirits of Burma were looking after her. The hill-road to Sutrain is a chilly stretch, and Georgina caught a bad cold. Still there was Georgie Porgie at the end of all the trouble to take her up in his arms and pet her, as he used to do in the old days when the stockade was shut for the night and he had approved of the evening meal. Georgina went forward as fast as she could; and her good spirits did her one last favour.

She reappeared, four hundred miles north of Calcutta, steadily heading north, looking very worn and haggard but determined to find Georgie Porgie. She didn’t understand the local language, but India is incredibly kind, and the women along the Grand Trunk offered her food. Something made her believe that Georgie Porgie was at the end of that harsh road. She might have seen a soldier who knew him in Burma, but no one can be sure. Finally, she found a regiment on the march and met one of the many junior officers whom Georgie Porgie had invited to dinner during the old days of chasing bandits. There was a bit of amusement among the tents when Georgina threw herself at the man’s feet and started to cry. There was no laughter when she told her story, but a collection was taken, which was more important. One of the junior officers knew where Georgie Porgie was but didn’t know about his marriage. He told Georgina, and she happily continued north in a train carriage that offered rest for her tired feet and shade for her dusty little head. The journey from the train through the hills to Sutrain was exhausting, but Georgina had money, and families traveling in bullock-carts helped her. It was almost a miraculous trip, and Georgina felt certain that the good spirits of Burma were watching over her. The road to Sutrain was chilly, and Georgina caught a bad cold. Yet, there was still Georgie Porgie waiting at the end of all her troubles to lift her up in his arms and comfort her, just like he used to in the old days when the stockade was closed for the night, and he had approved of the evening meal. Georgina moved forward as quickly as she could, and her good spirits did her one last favor.

An Englishman stopped her, in the twilight, just at the turn of the road into Sutrain, saying, ‘Good Heavens! What are you doing here?’

An Englishman stopped her in the dusk, right at the bend of the road into Sutrain, saying, ‘Good heavens! What are you doing here?’

He was Gillis, the man who had been Georgie Porgie’s assistant in Upper Burma, and who occupied the next post to Georgie Porgie’s in the jungle. Georgie Porgie had applied to have him to work with at Sutrain because he liked him.

He was Gillis, the guy who had been Georgie Porgie's assistant in Upper Burma and who held the position next to Georgie Porgie's in the jungle. Georgie Porgie had requested to have him join the team at Sutrain because he liked him.

‘I have come,’ said Georgina simply. ‘It was such a long way, and I have been months in coming. Where is his house?’

‘I’ve arrived,’ Georgina said straightforwardly. ‘It was such a long journey, and I’ve spent months getting here. Where is his house?’

Gillis gasped. He had seen enough of Georgina in the old times to know that explanations would be useless. You cannot explain things to the Oriental. You must show.

Gillis gasped. He had seen enough of Georgina back in the day to know that explanations would be pointless. You can't explain things to someone from the East. You have to show them.

‘I’ll take you there,’ said Gillis, and he led Georgina off the road, up the cliff, by a little pathway, to the back of a house set on a platform cut into the hillside.

‘I’ll take you there,’ said Gillis, and he led Georgina off the road, up the cliff, by a small path, to the back of a house built on a platform carved into the hillside.

The lamps were just lit, but the curtains were not drawn. ‘Now look,’ said Gillis, stopping in front of the drawing-room window. Georgina looked and saw Georgie Porgie and the Bride.

The lamps were just turned on, but the curtains were still open. ‘Now look,’ said Gillis, stopping in front of the living room window. Georgina looked and saw Georgie Porgie and the Bride.

She put her hand up to her hair, which had come out of its top-knot and was straggling about her face. She tried to set her ragged dress in order, but the dress was past pulling straight, and she coughed a queer little cough, for she really had taken a very bad cold. Gillis looked, too, but while Georgina only looked at the Bride once, turning her eyes always on Georgie Porgie, Gillis looked at the Bride all the time.

She ran her hand through her hair, which had come loose from its top-knot and was hanging messily around her face. She attempted to straighten her tattered dress, but it was beyond fixing, and she let out a strange little cough because she really had caught a terrible cold. Gillis watched as well, but while Georgina only glanced at the Bride once, constantly turning her gaze back to Georgie Porgie, Gillis kept his eyes on the Bride the whole time.

‘What are you going to do?’ said Gillis, who held Georgina by the wrist, in case of any unexpected rush into the lamplight. ‘Will you go in and tell that English woman that you lived with her husband?’

‘What are you going to do?’ said Gillis, holding Georgina by the wrist to prevent any sudden rush into the light. ‘Are you going to go in and tell that English woman that you lived with her husband?’

‘No,’ said Georgina faintly. ‘Let me go. I am going away. I swear that I am going away.’ She twisted herself free and ran off into the dark.

‘No,’ said Georgina weakly. ‘Let me go. I’m leaving. I swear I’m leaving.’ She wriggled free and dashed off into the darkness.

‘Poor little beast!’ said Gillis, dropping on to the main road. ‘I’d ha’ given her something to get back to Burma with. What a narrow shave though! And that angel would never have forgiven it.’

‘Poor little beast!’ said Gillis, dropping down onto the main road. ‘I would have given her something to take back to Burma. What a close call, though! And that angel would never have let it go.’

This seems to prove that the devotion of Gillis was not entirely due to his affection for Georgie Porgie.

This seems to show that Gillis's devotion wasn't solely because of his feelings for Georgie Porgie.

The Bride and the Bridegroom came out into the verandah after dinner, in order that the smoke of Georgie Porgie’s cheroots might not hang in the new drawing-room curtains.

The Bride and the Bridegroom stepped out onto the verandah after dinner so the smoke from Georgie Porgie’s cigars wouldn’t get into the new drawing-room curtains.

‘What is that noise down there?’ said the Bride. Both listened.

‘What’s that noise down there?’ said the Bride. They both listened.

‘Oh,’ said Georgie Porgie, ‘I suppose some brute of a hillman has been beating his wife.’

‘Oh,’ said Georgie Porgie, ‘I guess some jerk from the hills has been hitting his wife.’

‘Beating—his—wife! How ghastly!’ said the Bride. ‘Fancy YOUR beating ME!’ She slipped an arm round her husband’s waist, and, leaning her head against his shoulder, looked out across the cloud-filled valley in deep content and security.

‘Beating his wife! How terrible!’ said the Bride. ‘Imagine YOU beating ME!’ She wrapped an arm around her husband’s waist and, resting her head on his shoulder, gazed out across the cloud-filled valley in deep contentment and security.

But it was Georgina crying, all by herself, down the hillside, among the stones of the water-course where the washermen wash the clothes.

But it was Georgina crying all alone, down the hill, among the stones in the stream where the washermen clean the clothes.





NABOTH

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

This was how it happened; and the truth is also an allegory of Empire.

This is how it went down; and the truth is also a metaphor for Empire.

I met him at the corner of my garden, an empty basket on his head, and an unclean cloth round his loins. That was all the property to which Naboth had the shadow of a claim when I first saw him. He opened our acquaintance by begging. He was very thin and showed nearly as many ribs as his basket; and he told me a long story about fever and a lawsuit, and an iron cauldron that had been seized by the court in execution of a decree. I put my hand into my pocket to help Naboth, as kings of the East have helped alien adventurers to the loss of their kingdoms. A rupee had hidden in my waistcoat lining. I never knew it was there, and gave the trove to Naboth as a direct gift from Heaven. He replied that I was the only legitimate Protector of the Poor he had ever known.

I met him at the corner of my garden, with an empty basket on his head and a dirty cloth wrapped around his waist. That was all Naboth owned when I first saw him. He started our conversation by asking for help. He was really thin and looked like he had just as many ribs as his basket; he told me a long story about having a fever, a lawsuit, and an iron pot that the court had taken as part of a judgment. I reached into my pocket to help Naboth, as kings of the East have helped strangers at the cost of their own kingdoms. I found a rupee hidden in my waistcoat lining that I didn’t even know was there, and I gave it to Naboth as if it were a gift from Heaven. He responded that I was the only true Protector of the Poor he had ever met.

Next morning he reappeared, a little fatter in the round, and curled himself into knots in the front verandah. He said I was his father and his mother, and the direct descendant of all the gods in his Pantheon, besides controlling the destinies of the universe. He himself was but a sweetmeat-seller, and much less important than the dirt under my feet. I had heard this sort of thing before, so I asked him what he wanted. My rupee, quoth Naboth, had raised him to the ever-lasting heavens, and he wished to prefer a request. He wished to establish a sweetmeat-pitch near the house of his benefactor, to gaze on my revered countenance as I went to and fro illumining the world. I was graciously pleased to give permission, and he went away with his head between his knees.

The next morning he showed up again, a bit rounder, and curled himself up in knots on the front porch. He declared that I was his father and mother, and a direct descendant of all the gods in his pantheon, plus I controlled the fates of the universe. He himself was just a sweet treat seller and much less important than the dirt under my feet. I had heard this kind of thing before, so I asked him what he wanted. My rupee, he said, had elevated him to the everlasting heavens, and he had a request. He wanted to set up a sweet treat stall near the house of his benefactor so he could gaze at my revered face as I went in and out, lighting up the world. I graciously agreed to his request, and he left with his head tucked between his knees.

Now at the far end of my garden, the ground slopes toward the public road, and the slope is crowned with a thick shrubbery. There is a short carriage-road from the house to the Mall, which passes close to the shrubbery. Next afternoon I saw that Naboth had seated himself at the bottom of the slope, down in the dust of the public road, and in the full glare of the sun, with a starved basket of greasy sweets in front of him. He had gone into trade once more on the strength of my munificent donation, and the ground was as Paradise by my honoured favour. Remember, there was only Naboth, his basket, the sunshine, and the gray dust when the sap of my Empire first began.

Now at the far end of my garden, the ground slopes down toward the public road, and the slope is lined with thick bushes. There's a short driveway from the house to the Mall that runs right by the bushes. The next afternoon, I saw that Naboth had settled himself at the bottom of the slope, in the dusty public road, fully exposed to the sun, with a meager basket of greasy sweets in front of him. He had gone back into business again thanks to my generous donation, and the ground felt like Paradise because of my esteemed favor. Just remember, there was only Naboth, his basket, the sunlight, and the gray dust when the essence of my Empire first started.

Next day he had moved himself up the slope nearer to my shrubbery, and waved a palm-leaf fan to keep the flies off the sweets. So I judged that he must have done a fair trade.

The next day, he had moved himself up the slope closer to my bushes and was waving a palm-leaf fan to keep the flies away from the sweets. So, I figured he must have made a good deal.

Four days later I noticed that he had backed himself and his basket under the shadow of the shrubbery, and had tied an Isabella-coloured rag between two branches in order to make more shade. There were plenty of sweets in his basket. I thought that trade must certainly be looking up.

Four days later, I saw that he had moved himself and his basket under the shade of the bushes and had tied a light purple rag between two branches to create more shade. His basket was full of sweets. I figured business must be improving.

Seven weeks later the Government took up a plot of ground for a Chief Court close to the end of my compound, and employed nearly four hundred coolies on the foundations. Naboth bought a blue and white striped blanket, a brass lamp-stand, and a small boy, to cope with the rush of trade, which was tremendous.

Seven weeks later, the Government acquired a piece of land for a Chief Court near the end of my property and hired almost four hundred laborers for the foundations. Naboth bought a blue and white striped blanket, a brass lamp stand, and a small boy to handle the overwhelming surge in trade.

Five days later he bought a huge, fat, red-backed account-book, and a glass inkstand. Thus I saw that the coolies had been getting into his debt, and that commerce was increasing on legitimate lines of credit. Also I saw that the one basket had grown into three, and that Naboth had backed and hacked into the shrubbery, and made himself a nice little clearing for the proper display of the basket, the blanket, the books, and the boy.

Five days later, he bought a big, thick, red-backed ledger and a glass inkstand. I noticed that the coolies had been piling up debts with him, and that business was growing along trustworthy lines of credit. I also saw that one basket had turned into three, and that Naboth had cleared out some of the bushes to create a nice little space for showcasing the basket, the blanket, the books, and the boy.

One week and five days later he had built a mud fire-place in the clearing, and the fat account-book was overflowing. He said that God created few Englishmen of my kind, and that I was the incarnation of all human virtues. He offered me some of his sweets as tribute, and by accepting these I acknowledged him as my feudatory under the skirt of my protection.

One week and five days later, he had constructed a mud fireplace in the clearing, and the fat account book was overflowing. He claimed that God made few Englishmen like me and that I embodied all human virtues. He offered me some of his sweets as a tribute, and by accepting them, I recognized him as my vassal under my protection.

Three weeks later I noticed that the boy was in the habit of cooking Naboth’s mid-day meal for him, and Naboth was beginning to grow a stomach. He had hacked away more of my shrubbery and owned another and a fatter account-book.

Three weeks later, I noticed that the boy had taken to cooking Naboth's lunch for him, and Naboth was starting to gain some weight. He had cut back even more of my bushes and had another, bigger account book.

Eleven weeks later Naboth had eaten his way nearly through that shrubbery, and there was a reed hut with a bedstead outside it, standing in the little glade that he had eroded. Two dogs and a baby slept on the bedstead. So I fancied Naboth had taken a wife. He said that he had, by my favour, done this thing, and that I was several times finer than Krishna. Six weeks and two days later a mud wall had grown up at the back of the hut. There were fowls in front and it smelt a little. The Municipal Secretary said that a cess-pool was forming in the public road from the drainage of my compound, and that I must take steps to clear it away. I spoke to Naboth. He said I was Lord Paramount of his earthly concerns, and the garden was all my own property, and sent me some more sweets in a second-hand duster.

Eleven weeks later, Naboth had eaten through most of that shrubbery, and there was a reed hut with a bed outside it, sitting in the small clearing he had created. Two dogs and a baby were sleeping on the bed. So, I figured Naboth had gotten married. He said that he had, thanks to me, done this, and that I was many times better than Krishna. Six weeks and two days later, a mud wall had popped up at the back of the hut. There were chickens in front, and it smelled a bit. The Municipal Secretary mentioned that a cesspool was forming in the public road from the drainage of my property, and that I needed to do something about it. I talked to Naboth. He said I was in charge of his worldly affairs, that the garden was completely mine, and sent me some more sweets wrapped in a used cloth.

Two months later a coolie bricklayer was killed in a scuffle that took place opposite Naboth’s Vineyard. The Inspector of Police said it was a serious case; went into my servants’ quarters; insulted my butler’s wife, and wanted to arrest my butler. The curious thing about the murder was that most of the coolies were drunk at the time. Naboth pointed out that my name was a strong shield between him and his enemies, and he expected that another baby would be born to him shortly.

Two months later, a laborer bricklayer was killed in a fight that happened across from Naboth's Vineyard. The inspector of police said it was a serious case; he went into my servants' quarters, insulted my butler's wife, and tried to arrest my butler. The strange thing about the murder was that most of the laborers were drunk at the time. Naboth pointed out that my name was a strong protection for him against his enemies, and he expected another baby to be born to him soon.

Four months later the hut was ALL mud walls, very solidly built, and Naboth had used most of my shrubbery for his five goats. A silver watch and an aluminium chain shone upon his very round stomach. My servants were alarmingly drunk several times, and used to waste the day with Naboth when they got the chance. I spoke to Naboth. He said, by my favour and the glory of my countenance, he would make all his women-folk ladies, and that if any one hinted that he was running an illicit still under the shadow of the tamarisks, why, I, his Suzerain, was to prosecute.

Four months later, the hut was entirely made of mud walls, very solidly built, and Naboth had used up most of my shrubs for his five goats. A silver watch and an aluminum chain gleamed on his round belly. My servants were alarmingly drunk several times and often wasted the day with Naboth when they had the chance. I talked to Naboth. He said, with my favor and the glory of my presence, he would elevate all his women to lady status, and if anyone suggested that he was running an illegal still under the shade of the tamarisks, then I, his Suzerain, should take action.

A week later he hired a man to make several dozen square yards of trellis-work to put around the back of his hut, that his women-folk might be screened from the public gaze. The man went away in the evening, and left his day’s work to pave the short cut from the public road to my house. I was driving home in the dusk, and turned the corner by Naboth’s Vineyard quickly. The next thing I knew was that the horses of the phaeton were stamping and plunging in the strongest sort of bamboo net-work. Both beasts came down. One rose with nothing more than chipped knees. The other was so badly kicked that I was forced to shoot him.

A week later, he hired a man to build several dozen square yards of trellis-work around the back of his hut so that the women in his family could have some privacy. The man finished for the day and went home in the evening, leaving his work done to create a shortcut from the public road to my house. I was driving home in the twilight and quickly turned the corner by Naboth’s Vineyard. The next thing I knew, the horses of the carriage were tossing and struggling in a strong bamboo fence. Both horses fell. One got up with just a scrape on its knees. The other was so badly injured that I had to put him down.

Naboth is gone now, and his hut is ploughed into its native mud with sweetmeats instead of salt for a sign that the place is accursed. I have built a summer-house to overlook the end of the garden, and it is as a fort on my frontier whence I guard my Empire.

Naboth is gone now, and his hut has been turned back into the earth with sweets instead of salt as a sign that the place is cursed. I've built a summer house to overlook the end of the garden, and it feels like a fortress on my border from which I watch over my territory.

I know exactly how Ahab felt. He has been shamefully misrepresented in the Scriptures.

I completely understand how Ahab felt. He's been unfairly portrayed in the Scriptures.





THE DREAM OF DUNCAN PARRENNESS

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

[Footnote: Copyright, 1891, by MACMILLAN & Co.]

Like Mr. Bunyan of old, I, Duncan Parrenness, Writer to the Most Honourable the East India Company, in this God-forgotten city of Calcutta, have dreamed a dream, and never since that Kitty my mare fell lame have I been so troubled. Therefore, lest I should forget my dream, I have made shift to set it down here. Though Heaven knows how unhandy the pen is to me who was always readier with sword than ink-horn when I left London two long years since.

Like Mr. Bunyan from back in the day, I, Duncan Parrenness, Writer for the Honorable East India Company, in this neglected city of Calcutta, have had a dream, and since my mare Kitty went lame, I haven't been at peace. So, to make sure I don't forget my dream, I've managed to write it down here. Although Heaven knows I'm not great with a pen—I was always better with a sword than with a quill when I left London two long years ago.

When the Governor-General’s great dance (that he gives yearly at the latter end of November) was finisht, I had gone to mine own room which looks over that sullen, un-English stream, the Hoogly, scarce so sober as I might have been. Now, roaring drunk in the West is but fuddled in the East, and I was drunk Nor’-Nor’ Easterly as Mr. Shakespeare might have said. Yet, in spite of my liquor, the cool night winds (though I have heard that they breed chills and fluxes innumerable) sobered me somewhat; and I remembered that I had been but a little wrung and wasted by all the sicknesses of the past four months, whereas those young bloods that came eastward with me in the same ship had been all, a month back, planted to Eternity in the foul soil north of Writers’ Buildings. So then, I thanked God mistily (though, to my shame, I never kneeled down to do so) for license to live, at least till March should be upon us again.

When the Governor-General’s big dance (which he holds every year at the end of November) was over, I went to my room that overlooks the gloomy, un-English river, the Hoogly, hardly in a sober state. Now, being roaring drunk in the West is just a bit tipsy in the East, and I was drunk in a Nor’-Nor’easterly way, as Mr. Shakespeare might have put it. Yet, despite the alcohol, the cool night winds (though I’ve heard they can cause all sorts of chills and illnesses) sobered me up a bit; and I recalled that I had only been slightly frayed and worn down by all the sicknesses of the last four months, while those young guys who came east with me on the same ship had, just a month ago, ended up dead in the nasty ground north of Writers’ Buildings. So, I thanked God vaguely (though, to my shame, I never knelt down to do it) for the chance to live, at least until March came around again.

Indeed, we that were alive (and our number was less by far than those who had gone to their last account in the hot weather late past) had made very merry that evening, by the ramparts of the Fort, over this kindness of Providence; though our jests were neither witty nor such as I should have liked my Mother to hear.

Indeed, we who were alive (and there were definitely fewer of us than those who had passed away recently in the hot weather) had a great time that evening by the Fort's ramparts, celebrating this blessing from Providence; although our jokes weren't very clever or the kind I would have wanted my mother to hear.

When I had lain down (or rather thrown me on my bed) and the fumes of my drink had a little cleared away, I found that I could get no sleep for thinking of a thousand things that were better left alone. First, and it was a long time since I had thought of her, the sweet face of Kitty Somerset, drifted, as it might have been drawn in a picture, across the foot of my bed, so plainly, that I almost thought she had been present in the body. Then I remembered how she drove me to this accursed country to get rich, that I might the more quickly marry her, our parents on both sides giving their consent; and then how she thought better (or worse may be) of her troth, and wed Tom Sanderson but a short three months after I had sailed. From Kitty I fell a-musing on Mrs. Vansuythen, a tall pale woman with violet eyes that had come to Calcutta from the Dutch Factory at Chinsura, and had set all our young men, and not a few of the factors, by the ears. Some of our ladies, it is true, said that she had never a husband or marriage-lines at all; but women, and specially those who have led only indifferent good lives themselves, are cruel hard one on another. Besides, Mrs. Vansuythen was far prettier than them all. She had been most gracious to me at the Governor-General’s rout, and indeed I was looked upon by all as her preux chevalier—which is French for a much worse word. Now, whether I cared so much as the scratch of a pin for this same Mrs. Vansuythen (albeit I had vowed eternal love three days after we met) I knew not then nor did till later on; but mine own pride, and a skill in the small sword that no man in Calcutta could equal, kept me in her affections. So that I believed I worshipt her.

When I lay down (or rather threw myself on my bed) and the effects of my drink began to wear off, I found that I couldn’t sleep because a thousand thoughts kept racing through my mind that were better left untouched. First, after a long time of not thinking about her, the sweet face of Kitty Somerset floated across the foot of my bed, so clearly that I almost believed she was there in person. Then I recalled how she had pushed me to this cursed country to get rich so that I could marry her quickly, with both our parents agreeing; and then how she changed her mind (or maybe she just made a worse choice) about her promise to me and married Tom Sanderson just three months after I had set sail. From thinking about Kitty, I started to muse on Mrs. Vansuythen, a tall pale woman with violet eyes who had come to Calcutta from the Dutch Factory at Chinsura and had stirred up all our young men, along with a few of the employees. Some of our ladies, it’s true, said that she had neither husband nor marriage certificate at all; but women, especially those who have led somewhat questionable lives themselves, can be quite harsh on one another. Besides, Mrs. Vansuythen was much prettier than all of them. She had been very kind to me at the Governor-General’s ball, and indeed everyone regarded me as her noble knight—which is French for something much less flattering. Now, whether I cared even a little for this Mrs. Vansuythen (even though I had sworn eternal love three days after we first met) I didn’t know then, nor did I until later; but my own pride, along with a skill in fencing that no man in Calcutta could match, kept me in her good graces. So, I believed I was in love with her.

When I had dismist her violet eyes from my thoughts, my reason reproacht me for ever having followed her at all; and I saw how the one year that I had lived in this land had so burnt and seared my mind with the flames of a thousand bad passions and desires, that I had aged ten months for each one in the Devil’s school. Whereat I thought of my Mother for a while, and was very penitent: making in my sinful tipsy mood a thousand vows of reformation—all since broken, I fear me, again and again. To-morrow, says I to myself, I will live cleanly for ever. And I smiled dizzily (the liquor being still strong in me) to think of the dangers I had escaped; and built all manner of fine Castles in Spain, whereof a shadowy Kitty Somerset that had the violet eyes and the sweet slow speech of Mrs. Vansuythen, was always Queen.

Once I pushed her violet eyes out of my mind, I felt guilty for ever having followed her in the first place. I realized that the year I had spent in this place had burned and scarred my mind with the flames of countless bad passions and desires, aging me ten months for each one in the Devil’s school. This made me think of my mother for a bit, and I felt really sorry: in my sinful, tipsy state, I made a thousand promises to change—promises that I fear I broke over and over again. Tomorrow, I told myself, I would live purely forever. I smiled hazily (the alcohol still strong in my system) at the thought of the dangers I had avoided; and I imagined all sorts of beautiful daydreams, where a shadowy Kitty Somerset, with her violet eyes and sweet, slow way of speaking like Mrs. Vansuythen, was always the queen.

Lastly, a very fine and magnificent courage (that doubtless had its birth in Mr. Hastings’ Madeira) grew upon me, till it seemed that I could become Governor-General, Nawab, Prince, ay, even the Great Mogul himself, by the mere wishing of it. Wherefore, taking my first steps, random and unstable enough, towards my new kingdom, I kickt my servants sleeping without till they howled and ran from me, and called Heaven and Earth to witness that I, Duncan Parrenness, was a Writer in the service of the Company and afraid of no man. Then, seeing that neither the Moon nor the Great Bear were minded to accept my challenge, I lay down again and must have fallen asleep.

Lastly, a strong and impressive courage (that probably came from Mr. Hastings’ Madeira) grew within me, until it felt like I could become Governor-General, Nawab, Prince, and even the Great Mogul himself, just by wishing for it. So, taking my first steps, somewhat random and shaky, towards my new kingdom, I kicked my servants who were sleeping outside until they howled and ran away from me, calling Heaven and Earth to witness that I, Duncan Parrenness, was a Writer in the service of the Company and feared no man. Then, noticing that neither the Moon nor the Great Bear were willing to accept my challenge, I lay down again and must have fallen asleep.

I was waked presently by my last words repeated two or three times, and I saw that there had come into the room a drunken man, as I thought, from Mr. Hastings’ rout. He sate down at the foot of my bed in all the world as it belonged to him, and I took note, as well as I could, that his face was somewhat like mine own grown older, save when it changed to the face of the Governor-General or my father, dead these six months. But this seemed to me only natural, and the due result of too much wine; and I was so angered at his entry all unannounced, that I told him, not over civilly, to go. To all my words he made no answer whatever, only saying slowly, as though it were some sweet morsel: ‘Writer in the Company’s service and afraid of no man.’ Then he stops short, and turning round sharp upon me, says that one of my kidney need fear neither man nor devil; that I was a brave young man, and like enough, should I live so long, to be Governor-General. But for all these things (and I suppose that he meant thereby the changes and chances of our shifty life in these parts) I must pay my price. By this time I had sobered somewhat, and being well waked out of my first sleep, was disposed to look upon the matter as a tipsy man’s jest. So, says I merrily: ‘And what price shall I pay for this palace of mine, which is but twelve feet square, and my five poor pagodas a month? The Devil take you and your jesting: I have paid my price twice over in sickness.’ At that moment my man turns full towards me: so that by the moonlight I could see every line and wrinkle of his face. Then my drunken mirth died out of me, as I have seen the waters of our great rivers die away in one night; and I, Duncan Parrenness, who was afraid of no man, was taken with a more deadly terror than I hold it has ever been the lot of mortal man to know. For I saw that his face was my very own, but marked and lined and scarred with the furrows of disease and much evil living—as I once, when I was (Lord help me) very drunk indeed, have seen mine own face, all white and drawn and grown old, in a mirror. I take it that any man would have been even more greatly feared than I. For I am in no way wanting in courage.

I was soon awakened by my own last words repeated two or three times, and I noticed that a drunken man, as I guessed, had come into the room from Mr. Hastings’ party. He sat down at the foot of my bed as if the whole world belonged to him, and I tried to observe him as best as I could. His face looked a bit like mine but older, except when it changed to resemble the face of the Governor-General or my father, who had been dead for six months. But that seemed only natural to me, likely just the result of too much wine; I was so annoyed by his unexpected presence that I told him, not very politely, to leave. He didn’t respond to any of my words, only saying slowly, as if it were some delightful treat: ‘Writer in the Company’s service and afraid of no man.’ Then he abruptly turned to me and remarked that someone like me shouldn’t fear either man or devil; that I was a brave young man, and if I lived long enough, I might become Governor-General. But for all these things (which I took to mean the ups and downs of life here), I would have to pay my dues. By this time, I had sobered up a bit, and now awake from my initial sleep, I was inclined to see the situation as a tipsy person's joke. So, I said cheerfully, ‘And what price do I owe for this palace of mine, which is only twelve feet square, and my five measly pagodas a month? To hell with you and your joking: I’ve paid my dues more than twice with my illness.’ At that moment, the man turned fully towards me, and in the moonlight, I could see every line and wrinkle on his face. My drunken laughter faded, like the waters of our great rivers disappearing overnight; and I, Duncan Parrenness, who was not afraid of any man, was struck by a more profound terror than I believe any mortal has ever experienced. For I realized that his face was exactly like mine, but marked and lined and scarred by the ravages of disease and reckless living—just as I had once, when I was (God help me) very drunk, seen my own face, all white and drawn and aged, in a mirror. I think anyone would have felt even more frightened than I did. After all, I’m not lacking in courage.

After I had lain still for a little, sweating in my agony and waiting until I should awake from this terrible dream (for dream I knew it to be) he says again, that I must pay my price, and a little after, as though it were to be given in pagodas and sicca rupees: ‘What price will you pay?’ Says I, very softly: ‘For God’s sake let me be, whoever you are, and I will mend my ways from to-night.’ Says he, laughing a little at my words, but otherwise making no motion of having heard them: ‘Nay, I would only rid so brave a young ruffler as yourself of much that will be a great hindrance to you on your way through life in the Indies; for believe me,’ and here he looks full on me once more, ‘there is no return.’ At all this rigmarole, which I could not then understand, I was a good deal put aback and waited for what should come next. Says he very calmly, ‘Give me your trust in man.’ At that I saw how heavy would be my price, for I never doubted but that he could take from me all that he asked, and my head was, through terror and wakefulness, altogether cleared of the wine I had drunk. So I takes him up very short, crying that I was not so wholly bad as he would make believe, and that I trusted my fellows to the full as much as they were worthy of it. ‘It was none of my fault,’ says I, ‘if one half of them were liars and the other half deserved to be burnt in the hand, and I would once more ask him to have done with his questions.’ Then I stopped, a little afraid, it is true, to have let my tongue so run away with me, but he took no notice of this, and only laid his hand lightly on my left breast and I felt very cold there for a while. Then he says, laughing more: ‘Give me your faith in women.’ At that I started in my bed as though I had been stung, for I thought of my sweet mother in England, and for a while fancied that my faith in God’s best creatures could neither be shaken nor stolen from me. But later, Myself’s hard eyes being upon me, I fell to thinking, for the second time that night, of Kitty (she that jilted me and married Tom Sanderson) and of Mistress Vansuythen, whom only my devilish pride made me follow, and how she was even worse than Kitty, and I worst of them all—seeing that with my life’s work to be done, I must needs go dancing down the Devil’s swept and garnished causeway, because, forsooth, there was a light woman’s smile at the end of it. And I thought that all women in the world were either like Kitty or Mistress Vansuythen (as indeed they have ever since been to me) and this put me to such an extremity of rage and sorrow, that I was beyond word glad when Myself’s hand fell again on my left breast, and I was no more troubled by these follies.

After lying still for a while, sweating in my pain and waiting to wake up from this terrible dream (which I knew it was), he said again that I had to pay my price, and soon after, as if it were to be paid in pagodas and sicca rupees: ‘What price will you pay?’ I replied softly, ‘For God’s sake, let me be, whoever you are, and I will change my ways starting tonight.’ He laughed a little at my words but otherwise showed no sign of hearing them: ‘No, I just want to free a brave young rogue like you from a lot that will be a major obstacle on your journey through life in the Indies; for believe me,’ and here he looked directly at me again, ‘there is no going back.’ All this talk, which I couldn’t fully grasp at the time, threw me off guard, and I waited to see what would happen next. He calmly said, ‘Give me your trust in mankind.’ At that, I realized how heavy my price would be, as I never doubted that he could take from me everything he asked for, and my mind was, from fear and wakefulness, completely clear of the wine I had drunk. So I responded sharply, saying that I wasn’t as entirely bad as he claimed and that I trusted my peers just as much as they deserved it. ‘It’s not my fault,’ I said, ‘if half of them are liars and the other half deserve to be punished, and I would ask him once more to stop with his questions.’ Then I hesitated, a bit afraid for having let my tongue run away with me, but he paid no mind to that and simply placed his hand lightly on my left breast, which felt quite cold for a moment. Then he laughed again and said, ‘Give me your faith in women.’ I jumped in my bed as if I had been stung, thinking of my sweet mother back in England, and for a bit, I believed that my faith in God’s finest creations couldn’t be shaken or taken from me. But later, with Myself’s hard gaze on me, I started thinking again, for the second time that night, about Kitty (the one who jilted me and married Tom Sanderson) and Mistress Vansuythen, whom my damn pride made me pursue, and how she was even worse than Kitty, and I was the worst of them all—seeing that with my life's work ahead, I had to go dancing down the Devil’s well-prepared path because there was a flirtatious smile at the end of it. I thought all women in the world were either like Kitty or Mistress Vansuythen (as they have always been to me), and this filled me with such extreme rage and sorrow that I was beyond relieved when Myself’s hand fell again on my left breast, and I was no longer troubled by these foolish thoughts.

After this he was silent for a little, and I made sure that he must go or I awake ere long: but presently he speaks again (and very softly) that I was a fool to care for such follies as those he had taken from me, and that ere he went he would only ask me for a few other trifles such as no man, or for matter of that boy either, would keep about him in this country. And so it happened that he took from out of my very heart as it were, looking all the time into my face with my own eyes, as much as remained to me of my boy’s soul and conscience. This was to me a far more terrible loss than the two that I had suffered before. For though, Lord help me, I had travelled far enough from all paths of decent or godly living, yet there was in me, though I myself write it, a certain goodness of heart which, when I was sober (or sick) made me very sorry of all that I had done before the fit came on me. And this I lost wholly: having in place thereof another deadly coldness at the heart. I am not, as I have before said, ready with my pen, so I fear that what I have just written may not be readily understood. Yet there be certain times in a young man’s life, when, through great sorrow or sin, all the boy in him is burnt and seared away so that he passes at one step to the more sorrowful state of manhood: as our staring Indian day changes into night with never so much as the gray of twilight to temper the two extremes. This shall perhaps make my state more clear, if it be remembered that my torment was ten times as great as comes in the natural course of nature to any man. At that time I dared not think of the change that had come over me, and all in one night: though I have often thought of it since. ‘I have paid the price,’ says I, my teeth chattering, for I was deadly cold, ‘and what is my return?’ At this time it was nearly dawn, and Myself had begun to grow pale and thin against the white light in the east, as my mother used to tell me is the custom of ghosts and devils and the like. He made as if he would go, but my words stopt him and he laughed—as I remember that I laughed when I ran Angus Macalister through the sword-arm last August, because he said that Mrs. Vansuythen was no better than she should be. ‘What return?’—says he, catching up my last words—‘Why, strength to live as long as God or the Devil pleases, and so long as you live my young master, my gift.’ With that he puts something into my hand, though it was still too dark to see what it was, and when next I lookt up he was gone.

After that, he was quiet for a bit, and I figured he had to leave or I’d wake up soon. But then he spoke again, softly, telling me I was foolish for caring about the trivial things he had taken from me. He said before he left, he only wanted a few more little things that no man, or that boy either, would carry around here. And so it happened that he took from me, as if from my very heart, while looking into my eyes, whatever was left of my boyish soul and conscience. This felt like a far greater loss than the two I had suffered before. Even though, God help me, I had strayed far from any decent or godly way of living, there was still, even if I say so myself, a certain goodness in my heart that, when I was sober (or sick), made me truly regret everything I'd done before the fit hit me. And now I lost that completely, replaced by a deadly coldness in my heart. I'm not great with words, so I worry that what I've just written might not be easily understood. Yet there are moments in a young man's life when, through intense sorrow or sin, all his boyishness is burned and seared away, causing him to leap straight into the sorrowful reality of manhood—like how our glaring Indian day turns to night without even the gray of twilight to soften the transition. This might help clarify my situation if it's remembered that my torment was ten times worse than what any man usually experiences. At that moment, I didn’t dare think about the change that had swept over me in just one night, though I've often reflected on it since. “I’ve paid the price,” I said, my teeth chattering because I was freezing cold, “and what do I get in return?” By this time, it was almost dawn, and I had started to look pale and thin against the white light in the east, just as my mother used to say is how ghosts and devils appear. He seemed like he would leave, but my words stopped him, and he laughed—just like I remembered laughing when I ran a sword through Angus Macalister's arm last August because he said Mrs. Vansuythen wasn’t much better than she should be. “What do you get in return?” he echoed my last words. “Well, strength to live as long as God or the Devil wants, and as long as you’re alive, my young master, that's my gift to you.” With that, he put something into my hand, even though it was still too dark to see what it was, and when I looked up next, he was gone.

When the light came I made shift to behold his gift, and saw that it was a little piece of dry bread.

When the light appeared, I tried to see what he had given me and realized it was a small piece of dry bread.





THE INCARNATION OF KRISHNA MULVANEY

 Wohl auf, my bully cavaliers,
   We ride to church to-day,
 The man that hasn’t got a horse
   Must steal one straight away.

 Be reverent, men, remember
   This is a Gottes haus.
 Du, Conrad, cut along der aisle
   And schenck der whiskey aus.
                  HANS BREITMANN’S RIDE TO CHURCH.
Wohl auf, my bold friends,  
   We’re heading to church today,  
 The guy who doesn’t have a horse  
   Should just grab one right away.  

 Be respectful, guys, remember  
   This is a house of God.  
 You, Conrad, hurry down the aisle  
   And pour the whiskey out.  
                  HANS BREITMANN’S RIDE TO CHURCH.

Once upon a time, very far from England, there lived three men who loved each other so greatly that neither man nor woman could come between them. They were in no sense refined, nor to be admitted to the outer-door mats of decent folk, because they happened to be private soldiers in Her Majesty’s Army; and private soldiers of our service have small time for self-culture. Their duty is to keep themselves and their accoutrements specklessly clean, to refrain from getting drunk more often than is necessary, to obey their superiors, and to pray for a war. All these things my friends accomplished; and of their own motion threw in some fighting-work for which the Army Regulations did not call. Their fate sent them to serve in India, which is not a golden country, though poets have sung otherwise. There men die with great swiftness, and those who live suffer many and curious things. I do not think that my friends concerned themselves much with the social or political aspects of the East. They attended a not unimportant war on the northern frontier, another one on our western boundary, and a third in Upper Burma. Then their regiment sat still to recruit, and the boundless monotony of cantonment life was their portion. They were drilled morning and evening on the same dusty parade-ground. They wandered up and down the same stretch of dusty white road, attended the same church and the same grog-shop, and slept in the same lime-washed barn of a barrack for two long years. There was Mulvaney, the father in the craft, who had served with various regiments from Bermuda to Halifax, old in war, scarred, reckless, resourceful, and in his pious hours an unequalled soldier. To him turned for help and comfort six and a half feet of slow-moving, heavy-footed Yorkshireman, born on the wolds, bred in the dales, and educated chiefly among the carriers’ carts at the back of York railway-station. His name was Learoyd, and his chief virtue an unmitigated patience which helped him to win fights. How Ortheris, a fox-terrier of a Cockney, ever came to be one of the trio, is a mystery which even to-day I cannot explain. ‘There was always three av us,’ Mulvaney used to say. ‘An’ by the grace av God, so long as our service lasts, three av us they’ll always be. ‘Tis betther so.’

Once upon a time, far from England, there were three men who loved each other so much that no man or woman could come between them. They weren't exactly refined, and they wouldn't be welcomed at the doorsteps of respectable people since they were just private soldiers in Her Majesty’s Army. Private soldiers don't have much time for self-improvement. Their main job is to keep themselves and their gear clean, avoid getting drunk more than necessary, follow orders, and hope for a war. They managed all these things and even added some fighting on their own, which wasn’t required by the Army Regulations. Fate brought them to serve in India, which isn’t the golden land poets often describe. There, men die quickly, and those who survive face many strange challenges. I doubt my friends cared much about the social or political situation in the East. They participated in a significant war on the northern frontier, another on the western boundary, and a third in Upper Burma. Then their regiment paused to recruit, and they faced the endless monotony of cantonment life. They were drilled morning and evening on the same dusty parade ground. They walked the same stretch of dusty white road, went to the same church and the same bar, and slept in the same lime-washed barracks for two long years. There was Mulvaney, the experienced one, who had served with various regiments from Bermuda to Halifax. He was old in battle, scarred, reckless, resourceful, and during his pious moments, an unmatched soldier. A slow-moving, heavy-footed Yorkshireman, six and a half feet tall, named Learoyd turned to him for help and comfort. He was born on the wolds, raised in the dales, and mostly educated among the carrier's carts at York railway station. His main quality was his incredible patience, which helped him win fights. How Ortheris, a fox-terrier-like Cockney, became part of the trio is a mystery even I can't explain today. "There were always three of us," Mulvaney would say. "And by the grace of God, as long as we serve, there will always be three of us. It's better that way."

They desired no companionship beyond their own, and it was evil for any man of the regiment who attempted dispute with them. Physical argument was out of the question as regarded Mulvaney and the Yorkshireman; and assault on Ortheris meant a combined attack from these twain—a business which no five men were anxious to have on their hands. Therefore they flourished, sharing their drinks, their tobacco, and their money; good luck and evil; battle and the chances of death; life and the chances of happiness from Calicut in southern, to Peshawur in northern India.

They didn't want any company except for each other, and it was a bad idea for any man in the regiment to argue with them. Physical fights were out of the question when it came to Mulvaney and the Yorkshireman; attacking Ortheris meant facing a joint retaliation from these two—something no group of five men wanted to deal with. So, they thrived together, sharing their drinks, their smokes, and their cash; good luck and bad; battles and the risk of death; life and the chances of happiness from Calicut in the south to Peshawar in the north of India.

Through no merit of my own it was my good fortune to be in a measure admitted to their friendship—frankly by Mulvaney from the beginning, sullenly and with reluctance by Learoyd, and suspiciously by Ortheris, who held to it that no man not in the Army could fraternise with a red-coat. ‘Like to like,’ said he. ‘I’m a bloomin’ sodger—he’s a bloomin’ civilian. ‘Tain’t natural—that’s all.’

Through no effort of my own, I was fortunate enough to be somewhat accepted into their friendship—openly by Mulvaney from the start, grudgingly by Learoyd, and warily by Ortheris, who insisted that no one outside the Army could associate with a soldier. ‘Birds of a feather,’ he said. ‘I’m a bloody soldier—he’s a bloody civilian. It just isn’t right—that’s all.’

But that was not all. They thawed progressively, and in the thawing told me more of their lives and adventures than I am ever likely to write.

But that wasn't everything. They gradually opened up, and in doing so, shared more about their lives and adventures than I’ll probably ever write down.

Omitting all else, this tale begins with the Lamentable Thirst that was at the beginning of First Causes. Never was such a thirst—Mulvaney told me so. They kicked against their compulsory virtue, but the attempt was only successful in the case of Ortheris. He, whose talents were many, went forth into the highways and stole a dog from a ‘civilian’—videlicet, some one, he knew not who, not in the Army. Now that civilian was but newly connected by marriage with the colonel of the regiment, and outcry was made from quarters least anticipated by Ortheris, and, in the end, he was forced, lest a worse thing should happen, to dispose at ridiculously unremunerative rates of as promising a small terrier as ever graced one end of a leading string. The purchase-money was barely sufficient for one small outbreak which led him to the guard-room. He escaped, however, with nothing worse than a severe reprimand, and a few hours of punishment drill. Not for nothing had he acquired the reputation of being ‘the best soldier of his inches’ in the regiment. Mulvaney had taught personal cleanliness and efficiency as the first articles of his companions’ creed. ‘A dhirty man,’ he was used to say, in the speech of his kind, ‘goes to Clink for a weakness in the knees, an’ is coort-martialled for a pair av socks missin’; but a clane man, such as is an ornament to his service—a man whose buttons are gold, whose coat is wax upon him, an’ whose ‘coutrements are widout a speck—THAT man may, spakin’ in reason, do fwhat he likes an’ dhrink from day to divil. That’s the pride av bein’ dacint.’

Omitting everything else, this story starts with the Lamentable Thirst that was there at the beginning of everything. There has never been such a thirst—Mulvaney told me that. They struggled against their forced virtue, but only Ortheris managed to pull it off. He, who had many skills, went out onto the streets and stole a dog from a 'civilian'—in other words, someone he didn't know, who wasn't in the Army. This civilian had just gotten married to the colonel of the regiment, and an unexpected fuss was raised. Ultimately, he was compelled, to avoid worse consequences, to sell off a promising little terrier for ridiculously low prices. The money he got was barely enough to cover a minor incident that led him to the guardroom. He got away with nothing worse than a serious reprimand and a few hours of punishment drill. He had earned the reputation of being ‘the best soldier of his height’ in the regiment. Mulvaney preached personal cleanliness and efficiency as the core principles of his comrades’ code. ‘A dirty man,’ he would say, in his usual way, 'ends up in jail for a weakness in his knees and is court-martialed for missing a pair of socks; but a clean man, who is a credit to his service—a man whose buttons shine, whose coat is spotless, and whose gear is without a stain—THAT man can, reasonably speaking, do whatever he likes and drink to hell and back. That’s the pride of being decent.’

We sat together, upon a day, in the shade of a ravine far from the barracks, where a watercourse used to run in rainy weather. Behind us was the scrub jungle, in which jackals, peacocks, the gray wolves of the North-Western Provinces, and occasionally a tiger estrayed from Central India, were supposed to dwell. In front lay the cantonment, glaring white under a glaring sun; and on either side ran the broad road that led to Delhi.

We sat together one day in the shade of a ravine far from the barracks, where a stream used to flow during the rainy season. Behind us was the scrub jungle, where jackals, peacocks, the gray wolves from the North-Western Provinces, and occasionally a tiger wandering in from Central India were said to live. In front of us was the cantonment, shining white under the intense sun, and on either side was the wide road that led to Delhi.

It was the scrub that suggested to my mind the wisdom of Mulvaney taking a day’s leave and going upon a shooting-tour. The peacock is a holy bird throughout India, and he who slays one is in danger of being mobbed by the nearest villagers; but on the last occasion that Mulvaney had gone forth, he had contrived, without in the least offending local religious susceptibilities, to return with six beautiful peacock skins which he sold to profit. It seemed just possible then—

It was the scrub that made me think about Mulvaney taking a day off and going on a shooting trip. The peacock is considered a sacred bird in India, and anyone who kills one risks being attacked by nearby villagers; however, the last time Mulvaney went out, he managed to come back with six stunning peacock skins without upsetting the local beliefs, which he sold for a profit. It seemed just possible then—

‘But fwhat manner av use is ut to me goin’ out widout a dhrink? The ground’s powdher-dhry underfoot, an’ ut gets unto the throat fit to kill,’ wailed Mulvaney, looking at me reproachfully. ‘An’ a peacock is not a bird you can catch the tail av onless ye run. Can a man run on wather—an’ jungle-wather too?’

‘But what use is it to me going out without a drink? The ground’s powder-dry underfoot, and it gets into the throat like crazy,’ wailed Mulvaney, looking at me reproachfully. ‘And a peacock is not a bird you can catch by just grabbing its tail unless you run. Can a man run on water—and jungle water too?’

Ortheris had considered the question in all its bearings. He spoke, chewing his pipe-stem meditatively the while:

Ortheris had thought about the question from every angle. He spoke while thoughtfully chewing on the stem of his pipe:

‘Go forth, return in glory, To Clusium’s royal ‘ome:
 An’ round these bloomin’ temples ‘ang
 The bloomin’ shields o’ Rome.
‘Go forth, return in glory, To Clusium’s royal home:  
And around these blooming temples hang  
The blooming shields of Rome.

You better go. You ain’t like to shoot yourself—not while there’s a chanst of liquor. Me an’ Learoyd’ll stay at ‘ome an’ keep shop—‘case o’ anythin’ turnin’ up. But you go out with a gas-pipe gun an’ ketch the little peacockses or somethin’. You kin get one day’s leave easy as winkin’. Go along an’ get it, an’ get peacockses or somethin’.’

You should go. You wouldn’t want to shoot yourself—not while there’s a chance of getting some liquor. Learoyd and I will stay home and watch the shop—just in case anything comes up. But you go out with a gas-pipe gun and catch some of those little peacocks or something. You can get a day off as easy as pie. Go on and get it, and get those peacocks or something.

‘Jock,’ said Mulvaney, turning to Learoyd, who was half asleep under the shadow of the bank. He roused slowly.

‘Jock,’ Mulvaney said, turning to Learoyd, who was half asleep in the shade of the bank. He gradually woke up.

‘Sitha, Mulvaaney, go,’ said he.

“Go, Sitha, Mulvaaney,” he said.

And Mulvaney went; cursing his allies with Irish fluency and barrack-room point.

And Mulvaney left, cursing his allies in fluent Irish and with a sharp tongue.

‘Take note,’ said he, when he had won his holiday, and appeared dressed in his roughest clothes with the only other regimental fowling-piece in his hand. ‘Take note, Jock, an’ you Orth’ris, I am goin’ in the face av my own will—all for to please you. I misdoubt anythin’ will come av permiscuous huntin’ afther peacockses in a desolit lan’; an’ I know that I will lie down an’ die wid thirrrst. Me catch peacockses for you, ye lazy scutts—an’ be sacrificed by the peasanthry—Ugh!’

“Listen up,” he said, after he had earned his holiday and showed up in his roughest clothes with the only other regimental shotgun in his hand. “Listen up, Jock, and you Orth’ris, I’m going against my own will—just to make you happy. I doubt anything good will come from aimlessly hunting for peacocks in a deserted land; and I know I’ll end up lying down and dying from thirst. Me, catching peacocks for you, you lazy asses—and being sacrificed by the locals—ugh!”

He waved a huge paw and went away.

He waved a big paw and walked away.

At twilight, long before the appointed hour, he returned empty-handed, much begrimed with dirt.

At twilight, well before the scheduled time, he came back with nothing, covered in dirt.

‘Peacockses?’ queried Ortheris from the safe rest of a barrack-room table whereon he was smoking cross-legged, Learoyd fast asleep on a bench.

‘Peacocks?’ asked Ortheris from the comfortable spot of a barrack-room table where he was smoking with his legs crossed, while Learoyd was fast asleep on a bench.

‘Jock,’ said Mulvaney without answering, as he stirred up the sleeper. ‘Jock, can ye fight? Will ye fight?’

‘Jock,’ Mulvaney replied without answering, as he shook the sleeper awake. ‘Jock, can you fight? Will you fight?’

Very slowly the meaning of the words communicated itself to the half-roused man. He understood—and again—what might these things mean? Mulvaney was shaking him savagely. Meantime the men in the room howled with delight. There was war in the confederacy at last—war and the breaking of bonds.

Very slowly, the meaning of the words sunk in for the half-awake man. He understood—again—what could these things mean? Mulvaney was shaking him fiercely. Meanwhile, the men in the room were howling with excitement. There was finally war in the confederacy—war and the breaking of bonds.

Barrack-room etiquette is stringent. On the direct challenge must follow the direct reply. This is more binding than the ties of tried friendship. Once again Mulvaney repeated the question. Learoyd answered by the only means in his power, and so swiftly that the Irishman had barely time to avoid the blow. The laughter around increased. Learoyd looked bewilderedly at his friend—himself as greatly bewildered. Ortheris dropped from the table because his world was falling.

Barrack-room etiquette is strict. A direct challenge must be met with a direct response. This is more binding than even the strongest friendships. Mulvaney asked the question again. Learoyd reacted in the only way he could, so quickly that the Irishman barely managed to dodge the punch. Laughter erupted around them. Learoyd looked confusedly at his friend—who was just as confused. Ortheris jumped down from the table because he felt his world was collapsing.

‘Come outside,’ said Mulvaney, and as the occupants of the barrack-room prepared joyously to follow, he turned and said furiously, ‘There will be no fight this night—onless any wan av you is wishful to assist. The man that does, follows on.’

‘Come outside,’ said Mulvaney, and as the people in the barrack room eagerly got ready to follow, he turned and said angrily, ‘There won’t be any fight tonight—unless any one of you wants to help out. The man who does, can come along.’

No man moved. The three passed out into the moonlight, Learoyd fumbling with the buttons of his coat. The parade-ground was deserted except for the scurrying jackals. Mulvaney’s impetuous rush carried his companions far into the open ere Learoyd attempted to turn round and continue the discussion.

No one moved. The three stepped out into the moonlight, Learoyd struggling with the buttons of his coat. The parade ground was empty except for the scurrying jackals. Mulvaney’s impulsive sprint took his companions far into the open before Learoyd tried to turn around and continue the conversation.

‘Be still now. ‘Twas my fault for beginnin’ things in the middle av an end, Jock. I should ha’ comminst wid an explanation; but Jock, dear, on your sowl are ye fit, think you, for the finest fight that iver was—betther than fightin’ me? Considher before ye answer.’

‘Be still now. It was my fault for starting things in the middle of an ending, Jock. I should have begun with an explanation; but Jock, dear, on your soul do you think you are ready for the finest fight that ever was—better than fighting me? Consider before you answer.’

More than ever puzzled, Learoyd turned round two or three times, felt an arm, kicked tentatively, and answered, ‘Ah’m fit.’ He was accustomed to fight blindly at the bidding of the superior mind.

More confused than ever, Learoyd turned around two or three times, felt an arm, kicked hesitantly, and replied, ‘I’m good.’ He was used to fighting blindly at the command of a stronger will.

They sat them down, the men looking on from afar, and Mulvaney untangled himself in mighty words.

They sat them down, the men watching from a distance, and Mulvaney expressed himself with powerful words.

‘Followin’ your fools’ scheme I wint out into the thrackless desert beyond the barricks. An’ there I met a pious Hindu dhriving a bullock-kyart. I tuk ut for granted he wud be delighted for to convoy me a piece, an’ I jumped in—’

‘Following your fool’s plan, I went out into the trackless desert beyond the barracks. And there I met a devout Hindu driving a bullock cart. I took it for granted he would be happy to give me a ride, and I jumped in—’

‘You long, lazy, black-haired swine,’ drawled Ortheris, who would have done the same thing under similar circumstances.

‘You long, lazy, black-haired pig,’ Ortheris said with a drawl, even though he would have done the same thing in that situation.

‘’Twas the height av policy. That naygur-man dhruv miles an’ miles—as far as the new railway line they’re buildin’ now back av the Tavi river. “‘Tis a kyart for dhirt only,” says he now an’ again timoreously, to get me out av ut. “Dhirt I am,” sez I, “an’ the dhryest that you iver kyarted. Dhrive on, me son, an glory be wid you.” At that I wint to slape, an’ took no heed till he pulled up on the embankmint av the line where the coolies were pilin’ mud. There was a matther av two thousand coolies on that line—you remimber that. Prisintly a bell rang, an’ they throops off to a big pay-shed. “Where’s the white man in charge?” sez I to my kyart-dhriver. “In the shed,” sez he, “engaged on a riffle.”—“A fwhat?” sez I. “Riffle,” sez he. “You take ticket. He take money. You get nothin’.”—

‘It was the peak of policy. That guy drove for miles and miles—as far as the new railway line they’re building over by the Tavi River. “It’s a cart for dirt only,” he says again and again hesitantly, trying to get me out of it. “Dirt I am,” I say, “and the driest that you ever carted. Drive on, my son, and glory be with you.” At that, I went to sleep and didn't pay attention until he stopped on the embankment of the line where the workers were piling mud. There were about two thousand workers on that line—you remember that. Soon, a bell rang, and they all rushed off to a big pay-shed. “Where’s the white man in charge?” I asked my driver. “In the shed,” he said, “busy with a riffle.” —“A what?” I asked. “Riffle,” he said. “You take ticket. He takes money. You get nothing.”’

“Oho!” sez I, “that’s fwhat the shuperior an’ cultivated man calls a raffle, me misbeguided child av darkness an’ sin. Lead on to that raffle, though fwhat the mischief ‘tis doin’ so far away from uts home—which is the charity-bazaar at Christmas, an’ the colonel’s wife grinnin’ behind the tea-table—is more than I know.” Wid that I wint to the shed an’ found ‘twas pay-day among the coolies. Their wages was on a table forninst a big, fine, red buck av a man—sivun fut high, four fut wide, an’ three fut thick, wid a fist on him like a corn-sack. He was payin’ the coolies fair an’ easy, but he wud ask each man if he wud raffle that month, an’ each man sez? “Yes,” av course. Thin he wud deduct from their wages accordin’. Whin all was paid, he filled an ould cigar-box full av gun-wads an’ scatthered ut among the coolies. They did not take much joy av that performince, an’ small wondher. A man close to me picks up a black gun-wad an’ sings out, “I have ut.”—“Good may ut do you,” sez I. The coolie wint forward to this big, fine, red man, who threw a cloth off av the most sumpshus, jooled, enamelled an’ variously bedivilled sedan-chair I iver saw.’

“Oho!” I said, “that’s what the superior and cultured man calls a raffle, my misguided child of darkness and sin. Lead on to that raffle, though what the heck it’s doing so far from its home—which is the charity bazaar at Christmas, and the colonel’s wife grinning behind the tea table—is beyond me.” With that, I went to the shed and found it was payday for the coolies. Their wages were on a table in front of a big, impressive, red man—seven feet tall, four feet wide, and three feet thick, with fists like corn sacks. He was paying the coolies fairly and easily, but he would ask each man if he wanted to raffle that month, and each man said, “Yes,” of course. Then he would deduct from their wages accordingly. When all was paid, he filled an old cigar box with gun wads and scattered it among the coolies. They didn’t seem very happy about that performance, and it’s no wonder. A man near me picked up a black gun wad and shouted, “I have it.”—“Good luck with that,” I said. The coolie went up to this big, impressive red man, who threw a cloth off the most sumptuous, jeweled, enameled, and variously adorned sedan chair I ever saw.

‘Sedan-chair! Put your ‘ead in a bag. That was a palanquin. Don’t yer know a palanquin when you see it?’ said Ortheris with great scorn.

‘Sedan-chair! Put your head in a bag. That was a palanquin. Don’t you know a palanquin when you see one?’ said Ortheris with great disdain.

‘I chuse to call ut sedan-chair, an’ chair ut shall be, little man,’ continued the Irishman. ‘’Twas a most amazin’ chair—all lined wid pink silk an’ fitted wid red silk curtains. “Here ut is,” sez the red man. “Here ut is,” sez the coolie, an’ he grinned weakly-ways. “Is ut any use to you?” sez the red man. “No,” sez the coolie; “I’d like to make a presint av ut to you.”—“I am graciously pleased to accept that same,” sez the red man; an’ at that all the coolies cried aloud in fwhat was mint for cheerful notes, an’ wint back to their diggin’, lavin’ me alone in the shed. The red man saw me, an’ his face grew blue on his big, fat neck. “Fwhat d’you want here?” sez he. “Standin’-room an’ no more,” sez I, “onless it may be fwhat ye niver had, an’ that’s manners, ye rafflin’ ruffian,” for I was not goin’ to have the Service throd upon. “Out of this,” sez he. “I’m in charge av this section av construction.”—“I’m in charge av mesilf,” sez I, “an’ it’s like I will stay a while. D’ye raffle much in these parts?”—“Fwhat’s that to you?” sez he. “Nothin’,” sez I, “but a great dale to you, for begad I’m thinkin’ you get the full half av your revenue from that sedan-chair. Is ut always raffled so?” I sez, an’ wid that I wint to a coolie to ask questions. Bhoys, that man’s name is Dearsley, an’ he’s been rafflin’ that ould sedan-chair monthly this matther av nine months. Ivry coolie on the section takes a ticket—or he gives ‘em the go—wanst a month on pay-day. Ivry coolie that wins ut gives ut back to him, for ‘tis too big to carry away, an’ he’d sack the man that thried to sell ut. That Dearsley has been makin’ the rowlin’ wealth av Roshus by nefarious rafflin’. Think av the burnin’ shame to the sufferin’ coolie-man that the army in Injia are bound to protect an’ nourish in their bosoms! Two thousand coolies defrauded wanst a month!’

‘I choose to call it a sedan chair, and a chair it shall be, little man,’ continued the Irishman. ‘It was a truly amazing chair—all lined with pink silk and fitted with red silk curtains. “Here it is,” says the red man. “Here it is,” says the coolie, grinning weakly. “Is it any use to you?” says the red man. “No,” says the coolie; “I’d like to give it to you as a gift.” —“I’m graciously pleased to accept that,” says the red man; and at that, all the coolies shouted in what was meant to be cheerful tones, and went back to their digging, leaving me alone in the shed. The red man noticed me, and his face turned angry on his big, fat neck. “What do you want here?” says he. “Just standing room and nothing more,” says I, “unless it’s something you’ve never had, and that’s manners, you raucous ruffian,” because I wasn’t going to let the service be trampled on. “Out of this,” says he. “I’m in charge of this construction section.” —“I’m in charge of myself,” says I, “and I plan to stay a while. Do you raffle much in these parts?”—“What’s that to you?” says he. “Nothing,” says I, “but a great deal to you, because I’m thinking you get most of your income from that sedan chair. Is it always raffled like that?” I said, and with that, I went to a coolie to ask questions. Boys, that man’s name is Dearsley, and he’s been raffling that old sedan chair every month for the last nine months. Every coolie on the section buys a ticket—or he gives them away—once a month on payday. Every coolie who wins it gives it back to him, because it’s too big to carry away, and he would fire anyone who tried to sell it. That Dearsley has been making a fortune by shady raffling. Think of the burning shame to the poor coolie man that the army in India is supposed to protect and nurture! Two thousand coolies defrauded once a month!’

‘Dom t’ coolies. Has’t gotten t’ cheer, man?’ said Learoyd.

‘Hey, coolies. Haven’t you got the cheer, man?’ said Learoyd.

‘Hould on. Havin’ onearthed this amazin’ an’ stupenjus fraud committed by the man Dearsley, I hild a council av war; he thryin’ all the time to sejuce me into a fight with opprobrious language. That sedan-chair niver belonged by right to any foreman av coolies. ‘Tis a king’s chair or a quane’s. There’s gold on ut an’ silk an’ all manner av trapesemints. Bhoys, ‘tis not for me to countenance any sort av wrong-doin’—me bein’ the ould man—but—anyway he has had ut nine months, an’ he dare not make throuble av ut was taken from him. Five miles away, or ut may be six—’

“Hold on. After uncovering this amazing and ridiculous fraud committed by the man Dearsley, I held a war council; he was always trying to provoke me into a fight with offensive language. That sedan chair never belonged to any foreman of coolies by right. It’s a king’s chair or a queen’s. There’s gold on it and silk and all sorts of embellishments. Guys, it’s not for me to condone any kind of wrongdoing—being the old man—but anyway, he’s had it for nine months, and he wouldn’t dare cause trouble about it being taken from him. Five miles away, or maybe six—”

There was a long pause, and the jackals howled merrily. Learoyd bared one arm, and contemplated it in the moonlight. Then he nodded partly to himself and partly to his friends. Ortheris wriggled with suppressed emotion.

There was a long pause, and the jackals howled happily. Learoyd exposed one arm and looked it over in the moonlight. Then he nodded, partly to himself and partly to his friends. Ortheris squirmed with repressed feelings.

‘I thought ye wud see the reasonableness av ut,’ said Mulvaney. ‘I made bould to say as much to the man before. He was for a direct front attack—fut, horse, an’ guns—an’ all for nothin’, seein’ that I had no thransport to convey the machine away. “I will not argue wid you,” sez I, “this day, but subsequently, Mister Dearsley, me rafflin’ jool, we talk ut out lengthways. ‘Tis no good policy to swindle the naygur av his hard-earned emolumints, an’ by presint informashin’”—‘twas the kyart man that tould me—“ye’ve been perpethrating that same for nine months. But I’m a just man,” sez I, “an’ overlookin’ the presumpshin that yondher settee wid the gilt top was not come by honust”—at that he turned sky-green, so I knew things was more thrue than tellable—“not come by honust, I’m willin’ to compound the felony for this month’s winnin’s.”’

“I thought you would see the reasonableness of it,” said Mulvaney. “I had the nerve to tell the man as much before. He wanted to attack directly—with foot, horse, and guns—and all for nothing, since I had no transport to move the machine away. ‘I will not argue with you,’ I said, ‘today, but afterwards, Mister Dearsley, my friend, we’ll talk it out in detail. It’s not good policy to swindle the poor guy of his hard-earned money, and according to the current information”—it was the cart man who told me—“you’ve been doing that for nine months. But I’m a fair man,” I said, “and overlooking the assumption that that couch with the gilt top was not obtained honestly”—at that, he turned pale, so I knew things were more true than I could say—“not obtained honestly, I’m willing to compromise for this month’s winnings.”

‘Ah! Ho!’ from Learoyd and Ortheris.

‘Ah! Ho!’ from Learoyd and Ortheris.

‘That man Dearsley’s rushin’ on his fate,’ continued Mulvaney, solemnly wagging his head. ‘All Hell had no name bad enough for me that tide. Faith, he called me a robber! Me! that was savin’ him from continuin’ in his evil ways widout a remonstrince—an’ to a man av conscience a remonstrince may change the chune av his life. “‘Tis not for me to argue,” sez I, “fwhatever ye are, Mister Dearsley, but, by my hand, I’ll take away the temptation for you that lies in that sedan-chair.”—“You will have to fight me for ut,” sez he, “for well I know you will never dare make report to any one.”—“Fight I will,” sez I, “but not this day, for I’m rejuced for want av nourishment.”—“Ye’re an ould bould hand,” sez he, sizin’ me up an’ down; “an’ a jool av a fight we will have. Eat now an’ dhrink, an’ go your way.” Wid that he gave me some hump an’ whisky—good whisky—an’ we talked av this an’ that the while. “It goes hard on me now,” sez I, wipin’ my mouth, “to confiscate that piece av furniture, but justice is justice.”—“Ye’ve not got ut yet,” sez he; “there’s the fight between.”—“There is,” sez I, “an’ a good fight. Ye shall have the pick av the best quality in my rigimint for the dinner you have given this day.” Thin I came hot-foot to you two. Hould your tongue, the both. ‘Tis this way. To-morrow we three will go there an’ he shall have his pick betune me an’ Jock. Jock’s a deceivin’ fighter, for he is all fat to the eye, an’ he moves slow. Now, I’m all beef to the look, an’ I move quick. By my reckonin’ the Dearsley man won’t take me; so me an’ Orth’ris ‘ll see fair play. Jock, I tell you, ’twill be big fightin’—whipped, wid the cream above the jam. Afther the business ‘twill take a good three av us—Jock ‘ll be very hurt—to haul away that sedan-chair.’

"That guy Dearsley is rushing into his own doom," Mulvaney continued, shaking his head seriously. "There wasn't a bad enough name for me during that time. Can you believe he called me a robber? Me! I was saving him from continuing down his wrong path without any pushback—and to a man with a conscience, that pushback can change the course of his life. 'It’s not for me to argue,' I said, 'whatever you are, Mister Dearsley, but I swear I’ll take away the temptation for you that’s hanging in that sedan chair.'—'You’ll have to fight me for it,' he said, 'because I know you’ll never dare report it to anyone.'—'I will fight,' I replied, 'but not today, since I’m weak from lack of food.'—'You’re an old bold one,' he said, sizing me up; 'we're going to have a great fight. Eat and drink now, and then go on your way.' With that, he gave me some food and good whisky, and we chatted about this and that. 'It’s tough for me to take that piece of furniture,' I said, wiping my mouth, 'but justice is justice.'—'You haven’t taken it yet,' he said; 'there’s the fight in between.'—'There is,' I agreed, 'and a good fight it will be. You’ll get to choose the best from my regiment for the dinner you provided today.' Then I rushed over to both of you. Keep quiet, both of you. Here’s the plan. Tomorrow, the three of us will go there, and he’ll get to pick between Jock and me. Jock’s a tricky fighter because he looks all fat and moves slowly. I’m all muscle and quick on my feet. I reckon Dearsley won’t take me on; so Orth’ris and I will make sure it’s fair. Jock, I’m telling you, it’s going to be a big fight—I'll be on top. After it’s done, it’ll take all three of us—Jock is going to be really hurt—to carry that sedan chair away."

‘Palanquin.’ This from Ortheris.

‘Palanquin.’ This from Ortheris.

‘Fwhatever ut is, we must have ut. ‘Tis the only sellin’ piece av property widin reach that we can get so cheap. An’ fwhat’s a fight afther all? He has robbed the naygur-man, dishonust. We rob him honust for the sake av the whisky he gave me.’

‘Whatever it is, we need to have it. It’s the only piece of property we can get for so cheap. And what's a fight anyway? He’s robbed the other man, dishonestly. We’re just taking it honestly because of the whiskey he gave me.’

‘But wot’ll we do with the bloomin’ article when we’ve got it? Them palanquins are as big as ‘ouses, an’ uncommon ‘ard to sell, as McCleary said when ye stole the sentry-box from the Curragh.’

‘But what will we do with the blooming article once we have it? Those palanquins are as big as houses, and really hard to sell, like McCleary said when you stole the sentry-box from the Curragh.’

‘Who’s goin’ to do t’ fightin’?’ said Learoyd, and Ortheris subsided. The three returned to barracks without a word. Mulvaney’s last argument clinched the matter. This palanquin was property, vendible, and to be attained in the simplest and least embarrassing fashion. It would eventually become beer. Great was Mulvaney.

‘Who’s going to do the fighting?’ said Learoyd, and Ortheris quieted down. The three headed back to the barracks without saying a word. Mulvaney’s final point settled it. This palanquin was property, something that could be sold, and it could be obtained in the easiest and least awkward way. It would eventually turn into beer. Mulvaney was impressive.

Next afternoon a procession of three formed itself and disappeared into the scrub in the direction of the new railway line. Learoyd alone was without care, for Mulvaney dived darkly into the future, and little Ortheris feared the unknown. What befell at that interview in the lonely pay-shed by the side of the half-built embankment, only a few hundred coolies know, and their tale is confusing one, running thus—

Next afternoon, a group of three set off and vanished into the bushes heading toward the new railway line. Learoyd was the only one without worries, while Mulvaney anxiously contemplated the future, and little Ortheris was scared of the unknown. What happened during that meeting in the lonely pay-shed next to the half-built embankment is known only to a few hundred coolies, and their story is a confusing one, going like this—

‘We were at work. Three men in red coats came. They saw the Sahib—Dearsley Sahib. They made oration; and noticeably the small man among the red-coats. Dearsley Sahib also made oration, and used many very strong words. Upon this talk they departed together to an open space, and there the fat man in the red coat fought with Dearsley Sahib after the custom of white men—with his hands, making no noise, and never at all pulling Dearsley Sahib’s hair. Such of us as were not afraid beheld these things for just so long a time as a man needs to cook the mid-day meal. The small man in the red coat had possessed himself of Dearsley Sahib’s watch. No, he did not steal that watch. He held it in his hand, and at certain seasons made outcry, and the twain ceased their combat, which was like the combat of young bulls in spring. Both men were soon all red, but Dearsley Sahib was much more red than the other. Seeing this, and fearing for his life—because we greatly loved him—some fifty of us made shift to rush upon the red-coats. But a certain man—very black as to the hair, and in no way to be confused with the small man, or the fat man who fought—that man, we affirm, ran upon us, and of us he embraced some ten or fifty in both arms, and beat our heads together, so that our livers turned to water, and we ran away. It is not good to interfere in the fightings of white men. After that Dearsley Sahib fell and did not rise, these men jumped upon his stomach and despoiled him of all his money, and attempted to fire the pay-shed, and departed. Is it true that Dearsley Sahib makes no complaint of these latter things having been done? We were senseless with fear, and do not at all remember. There was no palanquin near the pay-shed. What do we know about palanquins? Is it true that Dearsley Sahib does not return to this place, on account of his sickness, for ten days? This is the fault of those bad men in the red coats, who should be severely punished; for Dearsley Sahib is both our father and mother, and we love him much. Yet, if Dearsley Sahib does not return to this place at all, we will speak the truth. There was a palanquin, for the up-keep of which we were forced to pay nine-tenths of our monthly wage. On such mulctings Dearsley Sahib allowed us to make obeisance to him before the palanquin. What could we do? We were poor men. He took a full half of our wages. Will the Government repay us those moneys? Those three men in red coats bore the palanquin upon their shoulders and departed. All the money that Dearsley Sahib had taken from us was in the cushions of that palanquin. Therefore they stole it. Thousands of rupees were there—all our money. It was our bank-box, to fill which we cheerfully contributed to Dearsley Sahib three-sevenths of our monthly wage. Why does the white man look upon us with the eye of disfavour? Before God, there was a palanquin, and now there is no palanquin; and if they send the police here to make inquisition, we can only say that there never has been any palanquin. Why should a palanquin be near these works? We are poor men, and we know nothing.’

‘We were at work. Three guys in red coats showed up. They saw the Sahib—Dearsley Sahib. They gave speeches, especially the small guy among the redcoats. Dearsley Sahib also spoke back and used a lot of strong words. After their talk, they went to an open space, and there the fat guy in the red coat fought Dearsley Sahib like white men do—with their hands, making no noise, and never pulling Dearsley Sahib’s hair. Those of us who weren't scared watched for as long as it takes to cook lunch. The small guy in the red coat had taken Dearsley Sahib’s watch. No, he didn’t steal that watch. He held it in his hand and at certain times shouted, making the two stop fighting, which was like young bulls fighting in spring. Both guys soon looked all red, but Dearsley Sahib was way redder than the other. Seeing this, and fearing for his life—because we really cared about him—about fifty of us tried to rush the redcoats. But one guy—very black-haired, and not to be confused with the small guy or the fat guy who fought—this guy, we say, came at us and grabbed some ten or fifty of us in both arms, banging our heads together until we felt weak and ran away. It’s not good to get involved in the fights of white men. After that, Dearsley Sahib fell and didn’t get up; these men jumped on his stomach, took all his money, and tried to set the pay-shed on fire before they left. Is it true that Dearsley Sahib doesn’t complain about these things that happened? We were so scared we can’t really remember. There was no palanquin near the pay-shed. What do we even know about palanquins? Is it true Dearsley Sahib won’t come back here for ten days because he’s sick? That’s because of those bad guys in red coats who should be punished; Dearsley Sahib is like both our father and mother, and we care about him a lot. But if Dearsley Sahib doesn’t come back here at all, we will tell the truth. There was a palanquin, which we had to pay nine-tenths of our monthly wage to maintain. For that, Dearsley Sahib let us show him respect before the palanquin. What could we do? We were poor guys. He took half of our wages. Will the Government give us that money back? Those three guys in red coats carried the palanquin on their shoulders and left. All the money that Dearsley Sahib took from us was in the cushions of that palanquin. So they stole it. There were thousands of rupees—all our money. It was our savings, which we gladly contributed to Dearsley Sahib three-sevenths of our monthly wage. Why does the white man look at us with disdain? Before God, there was a palanquin, and now there is no palanquin; if they send the police here to investigate, we can only say there has never been a palanquin. Why would a palanquin be near these works? We are poor men, and we know nothing.’

Such is the simplest version of the simplest story connected with the descent upon Dearsley. From the lips of the coolies I received it. Dearsley himself was in no condition to say anything, and Mulvaney preserved a massive silence, broken only by the occasional licking of the lips. He had seen a fight so gorgeous that even his power of speech was taken from him. I respected that reserve until, three days after the affair, I discovered in a disused stable in my quarters a palanquin of unchastened splendour—evidently in past days the litter of a queen. The pole whereby it swung between the shoulders of the bearers was rich with the painted papier-mache of Cashmere. The shoulder-pads were of yellow silk. The panels of the litter itself were ablaze with the loves of all the gods and goddesses of the Hindu Pantheon—lacquer on cedar. The cedar sliding doors were fitted with hasps of translucent Jaipur enamel and ran in grooves shod with silver. The cushions were of brocaded Delhi silk, and the curtains which once hid any glimpse of the beauty of the king’s palace were stiff with gold. Closer investigation showed that the entire fabric was everywhere rubbed and discoloured by time and wear; but even thus it was sufficiently gorgeous to deserve housing on the threshold of a royal zenana. I found no fault with it, except that it was in my stable. Then, trying to lift it by the silver-shod shoulder-pole, I laughed. The road from Dearsley’s pay-shed to the cantonment was a narrow and uneven one, and, traversed by three very inexperienced palanquin-bearers, one of whom was sorely battered about the head, must have been a path of torment. Still I did not quite recognise the right of the three musketeers to turn me into a ‘fence’ for stolen property.

This is the simplest version of the basic story about what happened at Dearsley. I heard it from the coolies. Dearsley wasn’t in any shape to say anything, and Mulvaney kept a heavy silence, broken only by the occasional licking of his lips. He had witnessed a fight so incredible that it left him speechless. I respected his silence until, three days later, I found a palanquin of stunning beauty in an old stable at my place—it was clearly once a royal litter. The pole used to carry it was beautifully decorated with painted papier-mâché from Kashmir. The shoulder pads were made of yellow silk. The sides of the litter were covered in vivid images of the loves of all the gods and goddesses of the Hindu pantheon—lacquer on cedar. The cedar sliding doors were fitted with translucent Jaipur enamel clasps and glided smoothly in silver-lined grooves. The cushions were made of brocaded Delhi silk, and the curtains that once concealed the beauty of the king’s palace were stiff with gold. A closer look revealed that the entire piece was worn and faded with age; but even so, it was splendid enough to deserve a place at the entrance of a royal zenana. I had no complaints about it, except that it was in my stable. Then, as I tried to lift it by the silver-adorned shoulder pole, I laughed. The path from Dearsley’s pay-shed to the cantonment was narrow and uneven, and having three very inexperienced palanquin bearers, one of whom was banged up pretty badly, must have made for a rough journey. Still, I didn’t quite understand why these three musketeers thought they could use me as a ‘fence’ for stolen goods.

‘I’m askin’ you to warehouse ut,’ said Mulvaney when he was brought to consider the question. ‘There’s no steal in ut. Dearsley tould us we cud have ut if we fought. Jock fought—an’, oh, sorr, when the throuble was at uts finest an’ Jock was bleedin’ like a stuck pig, an’ little Orth’ris was shquealin’ on one leg chewin’ big bites out av Dearsley’s watch, I wud ha’ given my place at the fight to have had you see wan round. He tuk Jock, as I suspicioned he would, an’ Jock was deceptive. Nine roun’s they were even matched, an’ at the tenth—About that palanquin now. There’s not the least throuble in the world, or we wud not ha’ brought ut here. You will ondherstand that the Queen—God bless her!—does not reckon for a privit soldier to kape elephints an’ palanquins an’ sich in barricks. Afther we had dhragged ut down from Dearsley’s through that cruel scrub that near broke Orth’ris’s heart, we set ut in the ravine for a night; an’ a thief av a porcupine an’ a civet-cat av a jackal roosted in ut, as well we knew in the mornin’. I put ut to you, sorr, is an elegint palanquin, fit for the princess, the natural abidin’ place av all the vermin in cantonmints? We brought ut to you, afther dhark, and put ut in your shtable. Do not let your conscience prick. Think av the rejoicin’ men in the pay-shed yonder—lookin’ at Dearsley wid his head tied up in a towel—an’ well knowin’ that they can dhraw their pay ivry month widout stoppages for riffles. Indirectly, sorr, you have rescued from an onprincipled son av a night-hawk the peasanthry av a numerous village. An’ besides, will I let that sedan-chair rot on our hands? Not I. ‘Tis not every day a piece av pure joolry comes into the market. There’s not a king widin these forty miles’—he waved his hand round the dusty horizon—‘not a king wud not be glad to buy ut. Some day meself, whin I have leisure, I’ll take ut up along the road an’ dishpose av ut.’

“I’m asking you to keep it,” Mulvaney said when he was asked the question. “There’s no theft involved. Dearsley told us we could have it if we fought. Jock fought—and, oh, sorry, when the trouble was at its worst and Jock was bleeding like a stuck pig, and little Orth’ris was squealing on one leg, chewing big bites out of Dearsley’s watch, I would have given up my spot in the fight to have you see one round. He took Jock, as I suspected he would, and Jock was tricky. For nine rounds, they were evenly matched, and at the tenth—About that palanquin now. There’s not a bit of trouble, or we wouldn’t have brought it here. You will understand that the Queen—God bless her!—does not expect a private soldier to keep elephants and palanquins and such in the barracks. After we dragged it down from Dearsley’s through that tough scrub that nearly broke Orth’ris’s heart, we left it in the ravine for a night; and a thieving porcupine and a civet-cat jackal roosted in it, as we knew in the morning. I put it to you, sir, is an elegant palanquin, fit for a princess, the natural home for all the vermin in the barracks? We brought it to you after dark and put it in your stable. Don’t let your conscience trouble you. Think of the celebrating men in the pay-shed over there—looking at Dearsley with his head wrapped in a towel—and knowing well that they can draw their pay every month without deductions for rifling. Indirectly, sir, you have saved the peasants of a large village from an unscrupulous son of a night-hawk. And besides, am I going to let that sedan-chair rot on our hands? Not a chance. It’s not every day a piece of pure jewelry comes onto the market. There’s not a king within these forty miles”—he waved his hand around the dusty horizon—“not a king who wouldn’t be glad to buy it. Someday myself, when I have the time, I’ll take it up the road and sell it.”

‘How?’ said I, for I knew the man was capable of anything.

‘How?’ I asked, because I knew he was capable of anything.

‘Get into ut, av coorse, and keep wan eye open through the curtains. Whin I see a likely man av the native persuasion, I will descind blushin’ from my canopy and say, “Buy a palanquin, ye black scutt?” I will have to hire four men to carry me first, though; and that’s impossible till next pay-day.’

‘Get into it, of course, and keep one eye open through the curtains. When I see a potential customer of the local persuasion, I will graciously descend from my canopy and say, “Buy a palanquin, you black scoundrel?” I will have to hire four men to carry me first, though; and that’s impossible until next payday.’

Curiously enough, Learoyd, who had fought for the prize, and in the winning secured the highest pleasure life had to offer him, was altogether disposed to undervalue it, while Ortheris openly said it would be better to break the thing up. Dearsley, he argued, might be a many-sided man, capable, despite his magnificent fighting qualities, of setting in motion the machinery of the civil law—a thing much abhorred by the soldier. Under any circumstances their fun had come and passed; the next pay-day was close at hand, when there would be beer for all. Wherefore longer conserve the painted palanquin?

Curiously enough, Learoyd, who had fought for the prize and found the greatest joy life had to offer him in winning it, was completely inclined to downplay its value, while Ortheris bluntly suggested it would be better to break it apart. Dearsley, he argued, could be a complex individual, capable—despite his amazing fighting abilities—of activating the machinery of civil law, which soldiers greatly despise. Regardless of the circumstances, their fun had come and gone; the next payday was just around the corner, bringing beer for everyone. So why keep the decorated palanquin any longer?

‘A first-class rifle-shot an’ a good little man av your inches you are,’ said Mulvaney. ‘But you niver had a head worth a soft-boiled egg. ‘Tis me has to lie awake av nights schamin’ an’ plottin’ for the three av us. Orth’ris, me son, ‘tis no matther av a few gallons av beer—no, nor twenty gallons—but tubs an’ vats an’ firkins in that sedan-chair. Who ut was, an’ what ut was, an’ how ut got there, we do not know; but I know in my bones that you an’ me an’ Jock wid his sprained thumb will get a fortune thereby. Lave me alone, an’ let me think.’

‘You’re a top-notch shot and a decent little guy considering your size,’ said Mulvaney. ‘But you've never had a brain worth a soft-boiled egg. It’s me who has to stay up at night scheming and plotting for the three of us. Honestly, my son, it’s not about a few gallons of beer—no, not even twenty gallons—but barrels and vats and kegs in that sedan chair. Who put it there, and what it is, and how it got there, we don’t know; but I can feel it in my bones that you, me, and Jock with his sprained thumb are going to hit the jackpot with this. Just leave me be and let me think.’

Meantime the palanquin stayed in my stall, the key of which was in Mulvaney’s hands.

Meantime, the palanquin stayed in my stall, and Mulvaney had the key.

Pay-day came, and with it beer. It was not in experience to hope that Mulvaney, dried by four weeks’ drought, would avoid excess. Next morning he and the palanquin had disappeared. He had taken the precaution of getting three days’ leave ‘to see a friend on the railway,’ and the colonel, well knowing that the seasonal outburst was near, and hoping it would spend its force beyond the limits of his jurisdiction, cheerfully gave him all he demanded. At this point Mulvaney’s history, as recorded in the mess-room, stopped.

Payday arrived, bringing with it beer. It was unrealistic to think that Mulvaney, deprived for four weeks, would hold back. The next morning, he and the palanquin were gone. He had made sure to request three days off "to visit a friend on the railway," and the colonel, fully aware that the seasonal celebration was approaching and hoping it would take place outside his authority, happily granted him everything he asked for. At this point, Mulvaney’s story, as noted in the mess room, came to an end.

Ortheris carried it not much further. ‘No, ‘e wasn’t drunk,’ said the little man loyally, ‘the liquor was no more than feelin’ its way round inside of ‘im; but ‘e went an’ filled that ‘ole bloomin’ palanquin with bottles ‘fore ‘e went off. ‘E’s gone an’ ‘ired six men to carry ‘im, an’ I ‘ad to ‘elp ‘im into ‘is nupshal couch, ‘cause ‘e wouldn’t ‘ear reason. ‘E’s gone off in ‘is shirt an’ trousies, swearin’ tremenjus—gone down the road in the palanquin, wavin’ ‘is legs out o’ windy.’

Ortheris didn’t take it much further. “No, he wasn’t drunk,” said the little man loyally, “the liquor was just starting to settle in him; but he went and filled that whole blooming palanquin with bottles before he took off. He’s gone and hired six guys to carry him, and I had to help him into his wedding bed because he wouldn’t listen to reason. He’s left in his shirt and pants, swearing like crazy—gone down the road in the palanquin, waving his legs out of the window.”

‘Yes,’ said I, ‘but where?’

"Yes," I said, "but where?"

‘Now you arx me a question. ‘E said ‘e was goin’ to sell that palanquin, but from observations what happened when I was stuffin’ ‘im through the door, I fancy ‘e’s gone to the new embankment to mock at Dearsley. ‘Soon as Jock’s off duty I’m goin’ there to see if ‘e’s safe—not Mulvaney, but t’other man. My saints, but I pity ‘im as ‘elps Terence out o’ the palanquin when ‘e’s once fair drunk!’

‘Now you ask me a question. He said he was going to sell that palanquin, but from what I saw when I was pushing him through the door, I think he’s gone to the new embankment to tease Dearsley. As soon as Jock’s off duty, I’m going to check if he’s okay—not Mulvaney, but the other guy. My goodness, I feel sorry for the one who helps Terence out of the palanquin when he’s completely drunk!’

‘He’ll come back without harm,’ I said.

‘He’ll come back safe,’ I said.

‘’Corse ‘e will. On’y question is, what ‘ll ‘e be doin’ on the road? Killing Dearsley, like as not. ‘E shouldn’t ‘a gone without Jock or me.’

‘’Course he will. Only question is, what will he be doing on the road? Killing Dearsley, most likely. He shouldn’t have gone without Jock or me.’

Reinforced by Learoyd, Ortheris sought the foreman of the coolie-gang. Dearsley’s head was still embellished with towels. Mulvaney, drunk or sober, would have struck no man in that condition, and Dearsley indignantly denied that he would have taken advantage of the intoxicated brave.

Reinforced by Learoyd, Ortheris looked for the foreman of the coolie gang. Dearsley’s head was still wrapped in towels. Mulvaney, drunk or sober, wouldn’t have hit anyone in that state, and Dearsley angrily insisted that he wouldn’t have taken advantage of the intoxicated man.

‘I had my pick o’ you two,’ he explained to Learoyd, ‘and you got my palanquin—not before I’d made my profit on it. Why’d I do harm when everything’s settled? Your man DID come here—drunk as Davy’s sow on a frosty night—came a-purpose to mock me—stuck his head out of the door an’ called me a crucified hodman. I made him drunker, an’ sent him along. But I never touched him.’

‘I had my choice between you two,’ he explained to Learoyd, ‘and you got my palanquin—not before I made my profit on it. Why would I cause trouble when everything's settled? Your guy DID come here—drunk as a skunk on a cold night—came here just to mock me—stuck his head out of the door and called me a crucified hodman. I got him even more drunk and sent him on his way. But I never laid a finger on him.’

To these things, Learoyd, slow to perceive the evidences of sincerity, answered only, ‘If owt comes to Mulvaaney ‘long o’ you, I’ll gripple you, clouts or no clouts on your ugly head, an’ I’ll draw t’ throat twistyways, man. See there now.’

To these things, Learoyd, slow to see the signs of sincerity, replied only, 'If anything happens to Mulvaaney because of you, I’ll grab you, clothes or no clothes on your ugly head, and I’ll twist your throat, man. Look at that now.'

The embassy removed itself, and Dearsley, the battered, laughed alone over his supper that evening.

The embassy withdrew, and Dearsley, feeling defeated, laughed by himself over his dinner that evening.

Three days passed—a fourth and a fifth. The week drew to a close and Mulvaney did not return. He, his royal palanquin, and his six attendants, had vanished into air. A very large and very tipsy soldier, his feet sticking out of the litter of a reigning princess, is not a thing to travel along the ways without comment. Yet no man of all the country round had seen any such wonder. He was, and he was not; and Learoyd suggested the immediate smashment of Dearsley as a sacrifice to his ghost. Ortheris insisted that all was well, and in the light of past experience his hopes seemed reasonable.

Three days went by—a fourth and a fifth. The week came to an end and Mulvaney still didn’t show up. He, his fancy palanquin, and his six attendants had disappeared without a trace. A very large and very drunk soldier, with his feet hanging out of a royal princess's litter, isn't something you see traveling down the road without people talking. Yet no one in the area had witnessed such a spectacle. He existed, and yet he didn’t; and Learoyd proposed immediately getting rid of Dearsley as an offering to his spirit. Ortheris argued that everything was fine, and given their past experiences, his optimism seemed justified.

‘When Mulvaney goes up the road,’ said he, ‘’e’s like to go a very long ways up, specially when ‘e’s so blue drunk as ‘e is now. But what gits me is ‘is not bein’ ‘eard of pullin’ wool off the niggers somewheres about. That don’t look good. The drink must ha’ died out in ‘im by this, unless ‘e’s broke a bank, an’ then—Why don’t ‘e come back? ‘E didn’t ought to ha’ gone off without us.’

‘When Mulvaney goes up the road,’ he said, ‘he’s likely to go a very long way, especially when he’s as drunk as he is now. But what gets me is his not being heard of stealing from the blacks somewhere around. That doesn’t look good. The drink must have worn off by now, unless he’s hit the jackpot, and then—Why doesn’t he come back? He shouldn’t have gone off without us.’

Even Ortheris’s heart sank at the end of the seventh day, for half the regiment were out scouring the country-side, and Learoyd had been forced to fight two men who hinted openly that Mulvaney had deserted. To do him justice, the colonel laughed at the notion, even when it was put forward by his much-trusted adjutant.

Even Ortheris’s heart sank at the end of the seventh day, because half the regiment was out searching the countryside, and Learoyd had to fight two guys who suggested openly that Mulvaney had deserted. To be fair, the colonel laughed at the idea, even when it was brought up by his highly trusted adjutant.

‘Mulvaney would as soon think of deserting as you would,’ said he. ‘No; he’s either fallen into a mischief among the villagers—and yet that isn’t likely, for he’d blarney himself out of the Pit; or else he is engaged on urgent private affairs—some stupendous devilment that we shall hear of at mess after it has been the round of the barrack-rooms. The worst of it is that I shall have to give him twenty-eight days’ confinement at least for being absent without leave, just when I most want him to lick the new batch of recruits into shape. I never knew a man who could put a polish on young soldiers as quickly as Mulvaney can. How does he do it?’

“Mulvaney wouldn’t think about bailing on us any more than you would,” he said. “No; he’s either gotten himself into some trouble with the villagers—and that seems unlikely because he could charm his way out of anything; or he’s caught up with some urgent personal issues—some huge mess that we’ll hear about at the next meal after it’s made the rounds of the barrack rooms. The worst part is that I’ll have to give him at least twenty-eight days in confinement for being AWOL, just when I need him to whip the new recruits into shape. I’ve never met anyone who can train young soldiers as effectively as Mulvaney. How does he do it?”

‘With blarney and the buckle-end of a belt, sir,’ said the adjutant. ‘He is worth a couple of non-commissioned officers when we are dealing with an Irish draft, and the London lads seem to adore him. The worst of it is that if he goes to the cells the other two are neither to hold nor to bind till he comes out again. I believe Ortheris preaches mutiny on those occasions, and I know that the mere presence of Learoyd mourning for Mulvaney kills all the cheerfulness of his room. The sergeants tell me that he allows no man to laugh when he feels unhappy. They are a queer gang.’

‘With charm and the end of a belt, sir,’ said the adjutant. ‘He’s worth a couple of non-commissioned officers when we’re handling an Irish draft, and the London guys seem to love him. The trouble is that if he ends up in the cells, the other two can’t manage a thing until he gets out again. I believe Ortheris stirs up trouble then, and I know that just having Learoyd around, mourning for Mulvaney, completely kills the mood in the room. The sergeants tell me he doesn’t allow anyone to laugh when he’s feeling down. They’re an odd bunch.’

‘For all that, I wish we had a few more of them. I like a well-conducted regiment, but these pasty-faced, shifty-eyed, mealy-mouthed young slouchers from the depot worry me sometimes with their offensive virtue. They don’t seem to have backbone enough to do anything but play cards and prowl round the married quarters. I believe I’d forgive that old villain on the spot if he turned up with any sort of explanation that I could in decency accept.’

‘Despite that, I wish we had a few more of them. I appreciate a well-run regiment, but these pale-faced, shifty-eyed, overly polite young slackers from the depot sometimes concern me with their annoying sense of righteousness. They don’t seem to have the guts to do anything other than play cards and hang around the married quarters. I think I’d immediately forgive that old scoundrel if he showed up with any kind of explanation that I could reasonably accept.’

‘Not likely to be much difficulty about that, sir,’ said the adjutant. ‘Mulvaney’s explanations are only one degree less wonderful than his performances. They say that when he was in the Black Tyrone, before he came to us, he was discovered on the banks of the Liffey trying to sell his colonel’s charger to a Donegal dealer as a perfect lady’s hack. Shackbolt commanded the Tyrone then.’

‘That shouldn’t be too hard, sir,’ said the adjutant. ‘Mulvaney’s explanations are just a bit less amazing than his actions. They say that when he was with the Black Tyrone, before he joined us, he was found by the Liffey trying to sell his colonel’s horse to a Donegal dealer as a perfect lady’s riding horse. Shackbolt was in charge of the Tyrone back then.’

‘Shackbolt must have had apoplexy at the thought of his ramping war-horses answering to that description. He used to buy unbacked devils, and tame them on some pet theory of starvation. What did Mulvaney say?’

‘Shackbolt must have had a fit at the thought of his charging war-horses being described that way. He used to buy wild ones and break them in based on some personal theory about starvation. What did Mulvaney say?’

‘That he was a member of the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, anxious to “sell the poor baste where he would get something to fill out his dimples.” Shackbolt laughed, but I fancy that was why Mulvaney exchanged to ours.’

‘That he was a member of the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, eager to “sell the poor beast where he could get something to fill out his dimples.” Shackbolt laughed, but I think that’s why Mulvaney transferred to our group.’

‘I wish he were back,’ said the colonel; ‘for I like him and believe he likes me.’

‘I wish he were back,’ said the colonel; ‘because I like him and I think he likes me too.’

That evening, to cheer our souls, Learoyd, Ortheris, and I went into the waste to smoke out a porcupine. All the dogs attended, but even their clamour—and they began to discuss the shortcomings of porcupines before they left cantonments—could not take us out of ourselves. A large, low moon turned the tops of the plume-grass to silver, and the stunted camelthorn bushes and sour tamarisks into the likenesses of trooping devils. The smell of the sun had not left the earth, and little aimless winds blowing across the rose-gardens to the southward brought the scent of dried roses and water. Our fire once started, and the dogs craftily disposed to wait the dash of the porcupine, we climbed to the top of a rain-scarred hillock of earth, and looked across the scrub seamed with cattle paths, white with the long grass, and dotted with spots of level pond-bottom, where the snipe would gather in winter.

That evening, to lift our spirits, Learoyd, Ortheris, and I headed into the wilderness to hunt for a porcupine. All the dogs joined us, but even their noise—and they started critiquing porcupines before we left the camps—couldn’t distract us. A big, low moon turned the tops of the grass to silver, and the stunted camelthorn bushes and sour tamarisks looked like dancing devils. The warmth of the sun still lingered on the earth, and gentle, aimless winds blowing from the rose gardens to the south carried the scent of dried roses and water. Once our fire was going and the dogs cleverly settled in to wait for the porcupine, we climbed to the top of a rain-eroded hill and looked out over the scrub marked with cattle paths, glowing white with tall grass, and speckled with flat areas of pond-bottom where snipe would gather in winter.

‘This,’ said Ortheris, with a sigh, as he took in the unkempt desolation of it all, ‘this is sanguinary. This is unusually sanguinary. Sort o’ mad country. Like a grate when the fire’s put out by the sun.’ He shaded his eyes against the moonlight. ‘An’ there’s a loony dancin’ in the middle of it all. Quite right. I’d dance too if I wasn’t so downheart.’

‘This,’ said Ortheris with a sigh, taking in the messy desolation of it all, ‘this is bloody. This is really bloody. Kind of a crazy place. Like a grate when the fire’s extinguished by the sun.’ He shielded his eyes against the moonlight. ‘And there’s a crazy person dancing in the middle of it all. Totally right. I’d dance too if I wasn’t so downhearted.’

There pranced a Portent in the face of the moon—a huge and ragged spirit of the waste, that flapped its wings from afar. It had risen out of the earth; it was coming towards us, and its outline was never twice the same. The toga, table-cloth, or dressing-gown, whatever the creature wore, took a hundred shapes. Once it stopped on a neighbouring mound and flung all its legs and arms to the winds.

There danced a warning in front of the moon—a massive and tattered spirit of the wilderness, fluttering its wings from a distance. It had risen from the ground; it was moving toward us, and its shape was constantly changing. The toga, tablecloth, or robe, whatever the creature was wearing, took on a hundred appearances. At one point, it paused on a nearby hill and spread all its limbs to the wind.

‘My, but that scarecrow ‘as got ‘em bad!’ said Ortheris. ‘Seems like if ‘e comes any furder we’ll ‘ave to argify with ‘im.’

‘Wow, that scarecrow has really got them good!’ said Ortheris. ‘Looks like if he comes any closer we’ll have to argue with him.’

Learoyd raised himself from the dirt as a bull clears his flanks of the wallow. And as a bull bellows, so he, after a short minute at gaze, gave tongue to the stars.

Learoyd got up from the dirt like a bull shaking off mud from his sides. And just like a bull bellows, after a brief moment of staring, he shouted at the stars.

‘MULVAANEY! MULVAANEY! A-hoo!’

‘MULVAANEY! MULVAANEY! Hey-ho!’

Oh then it was that we yelled, and the figure dipped into the hollow, till, with a crash of rending grass, the lost one strode up to the light of the fire and disappeared to the waist in a wave of joyous dogs! Then Learoyd and Ortheris gave greeting, bass and falsetto together, both swallowing a lump in the throat.

Oh, that’s when we shouted, and the figure sank into the hollow, until, with a crash of torn grass, the lost one stepped into the light of the fire and was surrounded up to the waist by a wave of happy dogs! Then Learoyd and Ortheris greeted him, one with a deep voice and the other with a high pitch, both managing to swallow a lump in their throats.

‘You damned fool!’ said they, and severally pounded him with their fists.

‘You stupid fool!’ they said, and each of them punched him with their fists.

‘Go easy!’ he answered; wrapping a huge arm round each. ‘I would have you to know that I am a god, to be treated as such—tho’, by my faith, I fancy I’ve got to go to the guard-room just like a privit soldier.’

‘Take it easy!’ he replied, wrapping a big arm around each of them. ‘Just so you know,

The latter part of the sentence destroyed the suspicions raised by the former. Any one would have been justified in regarding Mulvaney as mad. He was hatless and shoeless, and his shirt and trousers were dropping off him. But he wore one wondrous garment—a gigantic cloak that fell from collar-bone to heel—of pale pink silk, wrought all over in cunningest needlework of hands long since dead, with the loves of the Hindu gods. The monstrous figures leaped in and out of the light of the fire as he settled the folds round him.

The latter part of the sentence erased any doubts raised by the former. Anyone would have been justified in thinking Mulvaney was crazy. He had no hat and no shoes, and his shirt and pants were falling off him. But he had one amazing piece of clothing—a huge cloak that reached from his collarbone to his heels—made of pale pink silk, intricately decorated with the love stories of long-gone Hindu gods. The giant figures danced in and out of the firelight as he adjusted the folds around him.

Ortheris handled the stuff respectfully for a moment while I was trying to remember where I had seen it before. Then he screamed, ‘What ‘AVE you done with the palanquin? You’re wearin’ the linin’.’

Ortheris handled the stuff carefully for a moment while I was trying to remember where I had seen it before. Then he shouted, ‘What have you done with the palanquin? You’re wearing the lining.’

‘I am,’ said the Irishman, ‘an’ by the same token the ‘broidery is scrapin’ my hide off. I’ve lived in this sumpshus counterpane for four days. Me son, I begin to ondherstand why the naygur is no use. Widout me boots, an’ me trousies like an openwork stocking on a gyurl’s leg at a dance, I begin to feel like a naygur-man—all fearful an’ timoreous. Give me a pipe an’ I’ll tell on.’

‘I am,’ said the Irishman, ‘and by the same token, this embroidery is scraping my skin off. I’ve been living in this fancy bedspread for four days. My son, I’m starting to understand why the man is no use. Without my boots, and my pants feeling like a sheer stocking on a girl’s leg at a dance, I’m starting to feel like a scared man—all fearful and timid. Give me a pipe and I’ll spill the beans.’

He lit a pipe, resumed his grip of his two friends, and rocked to and fro in a gale of laughter.

He lit a pipe, held onto his two friends, and swayed back and forth in a fit of laughter.

‘Mulvaney,’ said Ortheris sternly, ‘’tain’t no time for laughin’. You’ve given Jock an’ me more trouble than you’re worth. You ‘ave been absent without leave an’ you’ll go into cells for that; an’ you ‘ave come back disgustin’ly dressed an’ most improper in the linin’ o’ that bloomin’ palanquin. Instid of which you laugh. An’ WE thought you was dead all the time.’

‘Mulvaney,’ Ortheris said seriously, ‘there’s no time for laughing. You’ve caused Jock and me more trouble than you’re worth. You’ve been absent without permission, and you’ll end up in a cell for that; and you came back looking absolutely terrible and totally inappropriate in that stupid palanquin. Instead of being sorry, you just laugh. And WE thought you were dead the whole time.’

‘Bhoys,’ said the culprit, still shaking gently, ‘whin I’ve done my tale you may cry if you like, an’ little Orth’ris here can thrample my inside out. Ha’ done an’ listen. My performances have been stupenjus: my luck has been the blessed luck av the British Army—an’ there’s no betther than that. I went out dhrunk an’ dhrinkin’ in the palanquin, and I have come back a pink god. Did any of you go to Dearsley afther my time was up? He was at the bottom of ut all.’

‘Guys,’ said the culprit, still shaking slightly, ‘after I tell my story, you can cry if you want, and little Orth’ris here can stomp my guts out. Now listen up. My performances have been incredible: my luck has been the blessed luck of the British Army—and there’s nothing better than that. I went out drunk and drinking in the palanquin, and I’ve come back a new man. Did any of you go to Dearsley after my time was up? He was behind it all.’

‘Ah said so,’ murmured Learoyd. ‘To-morrow ah’ll smash t’ face in upon his heead.’

‘Yeah, I said that,’ murmured Learoyd. ‘Tomorrow I’ll smash his face in on his head.’

‘Ye will not. Dearsley’s a jool av a man. Afther Ortheris had put me into the palanquin an’ the six bearer-men were gruntin’ down the road, I tuk thought to mock Dearsley for that fight. So I tould thim, “Go to the embankmint,” and there, bein’ most amazin’ full, I shtuck my head out av the concern an’ passed compliments wid Dearsley. I must ha’ miscalled him outrageous, for whin I am that way the power av the tongue comes on me. I can bare remimber tellin’ him that his mouth opened endways like the mouth av a skate, which was thrue afther Learoyd had handled ut; an’ I clear remimber his takin’ no manner nor matter av offence, but givin’ me a big dhrink of beer. ‘Twas the beer did the thrick, for I crawled back into the palanquin, steppin’ on me right ear wid me left foot, an’ thin I slept like the dead. Wanst I half-roused, an’ begad the noise in my head was tremenjus—roarin’ and rattlin’ an’ poundin’ such as was quite new to me. “Mother av Mercy,” thinks I, “phwat a concertina I will have on my shoulders whin I wake!” An’ wid that I curls mysilf up to sleep before ut should get hould on me. Bhoys, that noise was not dhrink, ‘twas the rattle av a thrain!’

'You won't. Dearsley’s a jewel of a man. After Ortheris put me into the palanquin and the six bearers were grunting down the road, I thought it would be funny to tease Dearsley about that fight. So I told them, “Go to the embankment,” and there, feeling incredibly full, I stuck my head out of the carriage and passed compliments to Dearsley. I must have called him something outrageous, because when I get that way, the power of speech takes over. I can barely remember telling him that his mouth opened sideways like a skate's mouth, which was true after Learoyd had handled it; and I clearly remember him not taking any offense at all, but giving me a big drink of beer. It was the beer that did the trick, because I crawled back into the palanquin, stepping on my right ear with my left foot, and then I slept like a log. Once, I half-awoke, and goodness, the noise in my head was tremendous—roaring and rattling and pounding like nothing I had ever experienced. “Mother of Mercy,” I thought, “what a concertina I'll have on my shoulders when I wake up!” And with that, I curled up to sleep before it could take hold of me. Boys, that noise wasn’t from the drink; it was the rattle of a train!'

There followed an impressive pause.

There was an impressive pause.

‘Yes, he had put me on a thrain—put me, palanquin an’ all, an’ six black assassins av his own coolies that was in his nefarious confidence, on the flat av a ballast-thruck, and we were rowlin’ an’ bowlin’ along to Benares. Glory be that I did not wake up thin an’ introjuce mysilf to the coolies. As I was sayin’, I slept for the betther part av a day an’ a night. But remimber you, that that man Dearsley had packed me off on wan av his material-thrains to Benares, all for to make me overstay my leave an’ get me into the cells.’

‘Yes, he had put me on a train—loaded me, palanquin and all, with six black assassins of his own crew that he trusted completely, on the flat of a ballast truck, and we were rolling along to Benares. Thank goodness I didn’t wake up then and introduce myself to the crew. Like I said, I slept for most of a day and a night. But remember, that guy Dearsley had sent me off on one of his freight trains to Benares, all to make me overstay my leave and get me thrown in jail.’

The explanation was an eminently rational one. Benares lay at least ten hours by rail from the cantonments, and nothing in the world could have saved Mulvaney from arrest as a deserter had he appeared there in the apparel of his orgies. Dearsley had not forgotten to take revenge. Learoyd, drawing back a little, began to place soft blows over selected portions of Mulvaney’s body. His thoughts were away on the embankment, and they meditated evil for Dearsley. Mulvaney continued—

The explanation was completely logical. Benares was at least ten hours by train from the military base, and nothing could have prevented Mulvaney from being arrested as a deserter if he showed up there dressed from his wild nights. Dearsley hadn’t forgotten to get back at him. Learoyd, stepping back a bit, started landing gentle hits on certain parts of Mulvaney’s body. His mind was focused on the embankment, plotting revenge against Dearsley. Mulvaney continued—

‘Whin I was full awake the palanquin was set down in a street, I suspicioned, for I cud hear people passin’ an’ talkin’. But I knew well I was far from home. There is a queer smell upon our cantonments—a smell av dried earth and brick-kilns wid whiffs av cavalry stable-litter. This place smelt marigold flowers an’ bad water, an’ wanst somethin’ alive came an’ blew heavy with his muzzle at the chink av the shutter. “It’s in a village I am,” thinks I to mysilf, “an’ the parochial buffalo is investigatin’ the palanquin.” But anyways I had no desire to move. Only lie still whin you’re in foreign parts an’ the standin’ luck av the British Army will carry ye through. That is an epigram. I made ut.

When I was fully awake, the palanquin was set down in a street, I guessed, because I could hear people passing by and talking. But I knew I was far from home. There’s a strange smell in our camps—a smell of dried earth and brick kilns mixed with hints of cavalry stable mess. This place smelled of marigold flowers and dirty water, and once something alive came and breathed heavily at the crack of the shutter. “I’m in a village,” I thought to myself, “and the local buffalo is checking out the palanquin.” But I really didn’t feel like moving. It’s best to stay still when you’re in a foreign place, and the luck of the British Army will see you through. That’s an epigram. I came up with it.

‘Thin a lot av whishperin’ divils surrounded the palanquin. “Take ut up,” sez wan man. “But who’ll pay us?” sez another. “The Maharanee’s minister, av coorse,” sez the man. “Oho!” sez I to mysilf, “I’m a quane in me own right, wid a minister to pay me expenses. I’ll be an emperor if I lie still long enough; but this is no village I’ve found.” I lay quiet, but I gummed me right eye to a crack av the shutters, an’ I saw that the whole street was crammed wid palanquins an’ horses, an’ a sprinklin’ av naked priests all yellow powder an’ tigers’ tails. But I may tell you, Orth’ris, an’ you, Learoyd, that av all the palanquins ours was the most imperial an’ magnificent. Now a palanquin means a native lady all the world over, except whin a soldier av the Quane happens to be takin’ a ride. “Women an’ priests!” sez I. “Your father’s son is in the right pew this time, Terence. There will be proceedin’s.” Six black divils in pink muslin tuk up the palanquin, an’ oh! but the rowlin’ an’ the rockin’ made me sick. Thin we got fair jammed among the palanquins—not more than fifty av them—an’ we grated an’ bumped like Queenstown potato-smacks in a runnin’ tide. I cud hear the women gigglin’ and squirkin’ in their palanquins, but mine was the royal equipage. They made way for ut, an’, begad, the pink muslin men o’ mine were howlin’, “Room for the Maharanee av Gokral-Seetarun.” Do you know aught av the lady, sorr?’

‘A lot of whispering devils surrounded the palanquin. “Pick it up,” said one man. “But who’s going to pay us?” asked another. “The Maharanee’s minister, of course,” replied the man. “Oh!” I thought to myself, “I’m a queen in my own right, with a minister to cover my expenses. I’ll be an emperor if I lie still long enough; but this isn’t just any village I’ve found.” I lay quiet, but I squinted my right eye through a crack in the shutters, and I saw that the whole street was packed with palanquins and horses, and a scattering of naked priests covered in yellow powder and tiger tails. But let me tell you, Orth’ris, and you, Learoyd, that of all the palanquins, ours was the most imperial and magnificent. Now, a palanquin means a native lady everywhere in the world, except when a soldier of the Queen happens to be taking a ride. “Women and priests!” I said. “Your father’s son is in the right place this time, Terence. There will be proceedings.” Six guys in pink muslin picked up the palanquin, and oh, the rolling and rocking made me sick. Then we got stuck among the palanquins—no more than fifty of them—and we grated and bumped like potato boats in a running tide. I could hear the women giggling and squealing in their palanquins, but mine was the royal carriage. They made way for it, and, by God, my pink muslin men were shouting, “Room for the Maharanee of Gokral-Seetarun.” Do you know anything about the lady, sir?’

‘Yes,’ said I. ‘She is a very estimable old queen of the Central Indian States, and they say she is fat. How on earth could she go to Benares without all the city knowing her palanquin?’

‘Yes,’ I said. ‘She’s a really respected old queen of the Central Indian States, and they say she’s overweight. How could she possibly go to Benares without everyone in the city recognizing her palanquin?’

‘’Twas the eternal foolishness av the naygur-man. They saw the palanquin lying loneful an’ forlornsome, an’ the beauty av ut, after Dearsley’s men had dhropped ut and gone away, an’ they gave ut the best name that occurred to thim. Quite right too. For aught we know the ould lady was thravellin’ incog—like me. I’m glad to hear she’s fat. I was no light weight mysilf, an’ my men were mortial anxious to dhrop me under a great big archway promiscuously ornamented wid the most improper carvin’s an’ cuttin’s I iver saw. Begad! they made me blush—like a—like a Maharanee.’

‘’It was the endless foolishness of the native man. They saw the palanquin sitting alone and sad, and the beauty of it, after Dearsley's men had dropped it off and left, and they gave it the best name that came to them. Quite right too. For all we know, the old lady was traveling incognito—like me. I'm glad to hear she's gained weight. I wasn't exactly light myself, and my men were incredibly eager to drop me under a big archway randomly decorated with the most inappropriate carvings and designs I ever saw. Goodness! they made me blush—like a—like a Maharanee.’

‘The temple of Prithi-Devi,’ I murmured, remembering the monstrous horrors of that sculptured archway at Benares.

‘The temple of Prithi-Devi,’ I whispered, recalling the terrifying horrors of that carved archway in Benares.

‘Pretty Devilskins, savin’ your presence, sorr! There was nothin’ pretty about ut, except me. ‘Twas all half dhark, an’ whin the coolies left they shut a big black gate behind av us, an’ half a company av fat yellow priests began pully-haulin’ the palanquins into a dharker place yet—a big stone hall full av pillars, an’ gods, an’ incense, an’ all manner av similar thruck. The gate disconcerted me, for I perceived I wud have to go forward to get out, my retreat bein’ cut off. By the same token a good priest makes a bad palanquin-coolie. Begad! they nearly turned me inside out draggin’ the palanquin to the temple. Now the disposishin av the forces inside was this way. The Maharanee av Gokral-Seetarun—that was me—lay by the favour av Providence on the far left flank behind the dhark av a pillar carved with elephints’ heads. The remainder av the palanquins was in a big half circle facing in to the biggest, fattest, an’ most amazin’ she-god that iver I dreamed av. Her head ran up into the black above us, an’ her feet stuck out in the light av a little fire av melted butter that a priest was feedin’ out av a butter-dish. Thin a man began to sing an’ play on somethin’ back in the dhark, an ‘twas a queer song. Ut made my hair lift on the back av my neck. Thin the doors av all the palanquins slid back, an’ the women bundled out. I saw what I’ll niver see again. ‘Twas more glorious than thransformations at a pantomime, for they was in pink an’ blue an’ silver an’ red an’ grass green, wid di’monds an’ im’ralds an’ great red rubies all over thim. But that was the least part av the glory. O bhoys, they were more lovely than the like av any loveliness in hiven; ay, their little bare feet were betther than the white hands av a lord’s lady, an’ their mouths were like puckered roses, an’ their eyes were bigger an’ dharker than the eyes av any livin’ women I’ve seen. Ye may laugh, but I’m speakin’ truth. I niver saw the like, an’ niver I will again.’

‘Beautiful Devilskins, saving your presence, sir! There was nothing pretty about it, except for me. It was all half dark, and when the coolies left, they shut a big black gate behind us, and a whole group of fat yellow priests started pulling the palanquins into an even darker place—a big stone hall filled with pillars, gods, incense, and all sorts of similar stuff. The gate bothered me, because I realized I would have to move forward to get out, my way back being blocked. By the same token, a good priest makes a bad palanquin-coolie. Goodness! They nearly turned me inside out dragging the palanquin to the temple. Now, the arrangement of the forces inside was this way. The Maharanee of Gokral-Seetarun—that was me—lay on the far left flank behind the dark of a pillar carved with elephant heads. The rest of the palanquins were in a big half circle facing the biggest, fattest, and most amazing goddess I’ve ever dreamed of. Her head reached into the black above us, and her feet were illuminated by a small fire of melted butter that a priest was serving from a butter-dish. Then a man began to sing and play something from the dark, and it was a strange song. It made my hair stand up on the back of my neck. Then the doors of all the palanquins slid open, and the women bundled out. I saw something I’ll never see again. It was more glorious than transformations at a pantomime, for they were dressed in pink and blue and silver and red and grass green, with diamonds and emeralds and great red rubies all over them. But that was the least of the glory. Oh boys, they were more lovely than anything in heaven; yes, their little bare feet were better than the white hands of a lady of the lord, and their mouths were like puckered roses, and their eyes were bigger and darker than any living woman’s I’ve seen. You may laugh, but I’m speaking the truth. I’ve never seen anything like it, and I never will again.’

‘Seeing that in all probability you were watching the wives and daughters of most of the Kings of India, the chances are that you won’t,’ I said, for it was dawning on me that Mulvaney had stumbled upon a big Queens’ Praying at Benares.

‘Since you were probably watching the wives and daughters of most of the Kings of India, you likely won’t,’ I said, as it was becoming clear to me that Mulvaney had discovered a major gathering of Queens praying at Benares.

‘I niver will,’ he said mournfully. ‘That sight doesn’t come twist to any man. It made me ashamed to watch. A fat priest knocked at my door. I didn’t think he’d have the insolince to disturb the Maharanee av Gokral-Seetarun, so I lay still. “The old cow’s asleep,” sez he to another. “Let her be,” sez that. “‘Twill be long before she has a calf!” I might ha’ known before he spoke that all a woman prays for in Injia—an’ for matter o’ that in England too—is childher. That made me more sorry I’d come, me bein’, as you well know, a childless man.’

"I never will," he said sadly. "That sight doesn’t happen to any man. It made me ashamed to watch. A heavyset priest knocked at my door. I didn’t think he’d have the nerve to disturb the Maharanee of Gokral-Seetarun, so I stayed quiet. 'The old cow’s asleep,' he said to someone else. 'Let her be,' came the reply. 'It’ll be a long time before she has a calf!' I should have known even before he spoke that all a woman prays for in India—and for that matter in England too—is children. That made me even more sorry I’d come, being, as you know well, a childless man."

He was silent for a moment, thinking of his little son, dead many years ago.

He was quiet for a moment, thinking about his little son, who had died many years ago.

‘They prayed, an’ the butter-fires blazed up an’ the incense turned everything blue, an’ between that an’ the fires the women looked as tho’ they were all ablaze an’ twinklin’. They took hold av the she-god’s knees, they cried out an’ they threw themselves about, an’ that world-without-end-amen music was dhrivin’ thim mad. Mother av Hiven! how they cried, an’ the ould she-god grinnin’ above thim all so scornful! The dhrink was dyin’ out in me fast, an’ I was thinkin’ harder than the thoughts wud go through my head—thinkin’ how to get out, an’ all manner of nonsense as well. The women were rockin’ in rows, their di’mond belts clickin’, an’ the tears runnin’ out betune their hands, an’ the lights were goin’ lower an’ dharker. Thin there was a blaze like lightnin’ from the roof, an’ that showed me the inside av the palanquin, an’ at the end where my foot was, stood the livin’ spit an’ image o’ mysilf worked on the linin’. This man here, ut was.’

‘They prayed, and the butter-fires flared up and the incense turned everything blue, and between that and the fires, the women looked like they were all on fire and sparkling. They grabbed the she-god’s knees, they shouted and threw themselves around, and that never-ending Amen music was driving them crazy. Mother of Heaven! how they cried, and the old she-god grinned down at them all, so scornful! The drink was fading fast in me, and I was thinking harder than I could manage—thinking about how to escape, and all sorts of nonsense as well. The women were swaying in rows, their diamond belts clicking, and tears were streaming from between their hands, and the lights were getting lower and darker. Then there was a flash like lightning from the roof, and that showed me the inside of the palanquin, and at the end where my foot was, stood the living image of myself worked on the lining. This man here, it was.’

He hunted in the folds of his pink cloak, ran a hand under one, and thrust into the firelight a foot-long embroidered presentment of the great god Krishna, playing on a flute. The heavy jowl, the staring eye, and the blue-black moustache of the god made up a far-off resemblance to Mulvaney.

He searched in the folds of his pink cloak, slid a hand under one, and brought out into the firelight a foot-long embroidered figure of the great god Krishna, playing a flute. The heavy jaw, the wide eye, and the blue-black mustache of the god bore a distant resemblance to Mulvaney.

‘The blaze was gone in a wink, but the whole schame came to me thin. I believe I was mad too. I slid the off-shutter open an’ rowled out into the dhark behind the elephint-head pillar, tucked up my trousies to my knees, slipped off my boots an’ tuk a general hould av all the pink linin’ av the palanquin. Glory be, ut ripped out like a woman’s dhriss whin you tread on ut at a sergeants’ ball, an’ a bottle came with ut. I tuk the bottle an’ the next minut I was out av the dhark av the pillar, the pink linin’ wrapped round me most graceful, the music thunderin’ like kettledrums, an’ a could draft blowin’ round my bare legs. By this hand that did ut, I was Khrishna tootlin’ on the flute—the god that the rig’mental chaplain talks about. A sweet sight I must ha’ looked. I knew my eyes were big, and my face was wax-white, an’ at the worst I must ha’ looked like a ghost. But they took me for the livin’ god. The music stopped, and the women were dead dumb an’ I crooked my legs like a shepherd on a china basin, an’ I did the ghost-waggle with my feet as I had done ut at the rig’mental theatre many times, an’ I slid acrost the width av that temple in front av the she-god tootlin’ on the beer bottle.’

The fire was gone in an instant, but everything felt thin to me. I think I was crazy too. I pushed the shutter open and crawled out into the dark behind the elephant-headed pillar, pulled my pants up to my knees, slipped off my boots, and took hold of all the pink lining of the palanquin. Wow, it ripped out like a woman’s dress when you step on it at a sergeant’s ball, and a bottle came with it. I grabbed the bottle and in the next moment, I was out of the darkness of the pillar, the pink lining wrapped around me quite gracefully, the music booming like kettledrums, and a cool draft blowing around my bare legs. By this hand that did it, I was Krishna playing the flute—the god that the regimental chaplain talks about. I must have looked like a sight. I knew my eyes were wide, and my face was white as wax, and at the very least, I must have looked like a ghost. But they thought I was a living god. The music stopped, and the women were completely silent, so I bent my legs like a shepherd on a china basin, and I did the ghost-waggle with my feet like I had done many times at the regimental theater, and I slid across the width of that temple in front of the goddess while playing the beer bottle.

‘Wot did you toot?’ demanded Ortheris the practical.

‘What did you toot?’ asked Ortheris the practical.

‘Me? Oh!’ Mulvaney sprang up, suiting the action to the word, and sliding gravely in front of us, a dilapidated but imposing deity in the half light. ‘I sang—

‘Me? Oh!’ Mulvaney jumped up, following his own words with action, and solemnly slid in front of us, a worn but impressive figure in the dim light. ‘I sang—

    ‘Only say
     You’ll be Mrs. Brallaghan.
     Don’t say nay,
     Charmin’ Judy Callaghan.
‘Just say  
You’ll be Mrs. Brallaghan.  
Don’t say no,  
Charming Judy Callaghan.

I didn’t know me own voice when I sang. An’ oh! ‘twas pitiful to see the women. The darlin’s were down on their faces. Whin I passed the last wan I cud see her poor little fingers workin’ one in another as if she wanted to touch my feet. So I dhrew the tail av this pink overcoat over her head for the greater honour, an’ I slid into the dhark on the other side av the temple, and fetched up in the arms av a big fat priest. All I wanted was to get away clear. So I tuk him by his greasy throat an’ shut the speech out av him. “Out!” sez I. “Which way, ye fat heathen?”—“Oh!” sez he. “Man,” sez I. “White man, soldier man, common soldier man. Where in the name av confusion is the back door?” The women in the temple were still on their faces, an’ a young priest was holdin’ out his arms above their heads.

I didn’t recognize my own voice when I sang. Oh! It was sad to see the women. The poor things were lying face down. When I passed the last one, I could see her little fingers intertwining as if she wanted to touch my feet. So I draped the tail of this pink overcoat over her head as a sign of respect, and I slipped into the dark on the other side of the temple, ending up in the arms of a big, chubby priest. All I wanted was to get away safely. So I grabbed him by his greasy throat and silenced him. “Out!” I said. “Which way, you fat heathen?”—“Oh!” he replied. “Man,” I said. “White man, soldier man, regular soldier man. Where in the world is the back door?” The women in the temple were still on their faces, and a young priest was holding his arms out above their heads.

‘“This way,” sez my fat friend, duckin’ behind a big bull-god an’ divin’ into a passage. Thin I remimbered that I must ha’ made the miraculous reputation av that temple for the next fifty years. “Not so fast,” I sez, an’ I held out both my hands wid a wink. That ould thief smiled like a father. I tuk him by the back av the neck in case he should be wishful to put a knife into me unbeknownst, an’ I ran him up an’ down the passage twice to collect his sensibilities! “Be quiet,” sez he, in English. “Now you talk sense,” I sez. “Fwhat ‘ll you give me for the use av that most iligant palanquin I have no time to take away?”—“Don’t tell,” sez he. “Is ut like?” sez I. “But ye might give me my railway fare. I’m far from my home an’ I’ve done you a service.” Bhoys, ‘tis a good thing to be a priest. The ould man niver throubled himself to dhraw from a bank. As I will prove to you subsequint, he philandered all round the slack av his clothes an’ began dribblin’ ten-rupee notes, old gold mohurs, and rupees into my hand till I could hould no more.’

“This way,” says my chubby friend, ducking behind a big bull statue and diving into a passage. Then I remembered that I must have created the miraculous reputation of that temple for the next fifty years. “Not so fast,” I said, and I stretched out both my hands with a wink. The old thief smiled like a father. I grabbed him by the back of the neck just in case he was thinking of stabbing me without me knowing, and I ran him up and down the passage twice to shake some sense into him! “Be quiet,” he said, in English. “Now you’re talking sense,” I replied. “What will you give me for the use of that very elegant palanquin I don’t have time to take away?”—“Don’t tell,” he said. “What’s it like?” I asked. “But you could at least give me my train fare. I’m far from home and I’ve done you a service.” Guys, it’s a good thing to be a priest. The old man never bothered to withdraw from a bank. As I will later show you, he fished all around inside his loose clothes and began dropping ten-rupee notes, old gold mohurs, and rupees into my hand until I couldn’t hold any more.

‘You lie!’ said Ortheris. ‘You’re mad or sunstrook. A native don’t give coin unless you cut it out o’ ‘im. ‘Tain’t nature.’

‘You’re lying!’ said Ortheris. ‘You must be crazy or overheated. A local won’t give you money unless you force it out of them. That’s not how it works.’

‘Then my lie an’ my sunstroke is concealed under that lump av sod yonder,’ retorted Mulvaney unruffled, nodding across the scrub. ‘An’ there’s a dale more in nature than your squidgy little legs have iver taken you to, Orth’ris, me son. Four hundred an’ thirty-four rupees by my reckonin’, AN’ a big fat gold necklace that I took from him as a remimbrancer, was our share in that business.’

‘Then my lie and my sunstroke are hidden under that lump of dirt over there,’ Mulvaney responded calmly, nodding across the brush. ‘And there’s a lot more in the world than your squishy little legs have ever taken you to, Orth’ris, my boy. Four hundred and thirty-four rupees by my calculation, AND a big fat gold necklace that I took from him as a keepsake, was our share in that deal.’

‘An’ ‘e give it you for love?’ said Ortheris.

‘And he gave it to you out of love?’ said Ortheris.

‘We were alone in that passage. Maybe I was a trifle too pressin’, but considher fwhat I had done for the good av the temple and the iverlastin’ joy av those women. ‘Twas cheap at the price. I wud ha’ taken more if I cud ha’ found ut. I turned the ould man upside down at the last, but he was milked dhry. Thin he opened a door in another passage an’ I found mysilf up to my knees in Benares river-water, an’ bad smellin’ ut is. More by token I had come out on the river-line close to the burnin’ ghat and contagious to a cracklin’ corpse. This was in the heart av the night, for I had been four hours in the temple. There was a crowd av boats tied up, so I tuk wan an’ wint across the river. Thin I came home acrost country, lyin’ up by day.’

‘We were alone in that passage. Maybe I was being a bit too pushy, but consider what I did for the good of the temple and the lasting happiness of those women. It was worth every bit. I would have taken more if I could have managed it. I turned the old man upside down in the end, but he was completely drained. Then he opened a door in another passage and I found myself up to my knees in Benares river water, and it was pretty foul. To make matters worse, I had ended up by the riverbank close to the burning ghat and right next to a crackling corpse. This was in the dead of night since I had spent four hours in the temple. There was a crowd of boats tied up, so I took one and went across the river. Then I made my way home through the countryside, hiding out during the day.’

‘How on earth did you manage?’ I said.

‘How did you pull that off?’ I said.

‘How did Sir Frederick Roberts get from Cabul to Candahar? He marched an’ he niver tould how near he was to breakin’ down. That’s why he is fwhat he is. An’ now—’ Mulvaney yawned portentously. ‘Now I will go an’ give myself up for absince widout leave. It’s eight an’ twenty days an’ the rough end of the colonel’s tongue in orderly room, any way you look at ut. But ‘tis cheap at the price.’

‘How did Sir Frederick Roberts get from Kabul to Kandahar? He marched and he never said how close he was to breaking down. That’s why he is who he is. And now—’ Mulvaney yawned dramatically. ‘Now I'm going to turn myself in for absence without leave. It's been twenty-eight days and I'll be getting the rough end of the colonel’s tongue in the orderly room, no matter how you look at it. But it’s worth it.’

‘Mulvaney,’ said I softly. ‘If there happens to be any sort of excuse that the colonel can in any way accept, I have a notion that you’ll get nothing more than the dressing-gown. The new recruits are in, and—’

‘Mulvaney,’ I said softly. ‘If there’s any excuse the colonel might accept, I have a feeling you’ll end up with just the dressing gown. The new recruits are here, and—’

‘Not a word more, sorr. Is ut excuses the old man wants? ‘Tis not my way, but he shall have thim. I’ll tell him I was engaged in financial operations connected wid a church,’ and he flapped his way to cantonments and the cells, singing lustily—

‘Not a word more, sir. Is it excuses the old man wants? That’s not my style, but he’ll get them. I’ll tell him I was involved in financial dealings related to a church,’ and he flapped his way to the barracks and the cells, singing cheerfully—

    ‘So they sent a corp’ril’s file,
     And they put me in the gyard-room
     For conduck unbecomin’ of a soldier.’ 
‘So they sent a corporal’s file,  
And they put me in the guardroom  
For conduct unbecoming of a soldier.’  

And when he was lost in the midst of the moonlight we could hear the refrain—

And when he was lost in the moonlight, we could hear the refrain—

     Bang upon the big drum, bash upon the cymbals,
     As we go marchin’ along, boys, oh!
     For although in this campaign
     There’s no whisky nor champagne,
     We’ll keep our spirits goin’ with a song, boys!’ 
     Hit the big drum, crash the cymbals,
     As we march along, guys, oh!
     For even though in this campaign
     There’s no whiskey or champagne,
     We’ll keep our spirits up with a song, guys!

Therewith he surrendered himself to the joyful and almost weeping guard, and was made much of by his fellows. But to the colonel he said that he had been smitten with sunstroke and had lain insensible on a villager’s cot for untold hours; and between laughter and goodwill the affair was smoothed over, so that he could, next day, teach the new recruits how to ‘Fear God, Honour the Queen, Shoot Straight, and Keep Clean.’

Therewith, he gave himself up to the cheerful and nearly crying guard, and his fellow soldiers took great care of him. But to the colonel, he claimed that he had suffered from sunstroke and had been passed out on a villager's cot for hours on end; and amid laughter and camaraderie, the situation was smoothed over, so that he could, the next day, instruct the new recruits on how to 'Fear God, Honor the Queen, Shoot Straight, and Keep Clean.'





THE COURTING OF DINAH SHADD

     What did the colonel’s lady think?
       Nobody never knew.
     Somebody asked the sergeant’s wife
       An’ she told ‘em true.
     When you git to a man in the case
       They’re like a row o’ pins,
     For the colonel’s lady an’ Judy O’Grady
       Are sisters under their skins.
                          BARRACK-ROOM BALLAD.
     What did the colonel's wife think?
       Nobody ever knew.
     Someone asked the sergeant's wife
       And she told them the truth.
     When you get to a man in the situation
       They're like a row of pins,
     For the colonel's wife and Judy O'Grady
       Are sisters beneath their skin.
                          BARRACK-ROOM BALLAD.

Al day I had followed at the heels of a pursuing army engaged on one of the finest battles that ever camp of exercise beheld. Thirty thousand troops had by the wisdom of the Government of India been turned loose over a few thousand square miles of country to practise in peace what they would never attempt in war. Consequently cavalry charged unshaken infantry at the trot. Infantry captured artillery by frontal attacks delivered in line of quarter columns, and mounted infantry skirmished up to the wheels of an armoured train which carried nothing more deadly than a twenty-five pounder Armstrong, two Nordenfeldts, and a few score volunteers all cased in three-eighths-inch boiler-plate. Yet it was a very lifelike camp. Operations did not cease at sundown; nobody knew the country and nobody spared man or horse. There was unending cavalry scouting and almost unending forced work over broken ground. The Army of the South had finally pierced the centre of the Army of the North, and was pouring through the gap hot-foot to capture a city of strategic importance. Its front extended fanwise, the sticks being represented by regiments strung out along the line of route backwards to the divisional transport columns and all the lumber that trails behind an army on the move. On its right the broken left of the Army of the North was flying in mass, chased by the Southern horse and hammered by the Southern guns till these had been pushed far beyond the limits of their last support. Then the flying sat down to rest, while the elated commandant of the pursuing force telegraphed that he held all in check and observation.

All day I had followed closely behind an army engaged in one of the greatest battles ever witnessed in a training camp. Thirty thousand troops had been unleashed by the Government of India over a few thousand square miles of territory to practice peacefully what they would never attempt in actual war. As a result, cavalry charged unshaken infantry at a trot. Infantry captured artillery through frontal attacks carried out in a quarter-column formation, and mounted infantry skirmished up to the wheels of an armored train, which carried nothing more deadly than a twenty-five-pounder Armstrong, two Nordenfeldts, and a few dozen volunteers all encased in three-eighths-inch boiler plate. Yet it was a very realistic drill. Operations didn’t stop at sundown; no one knew the area, and no one spared man or horse. There was endless cavalry scouting and nearly continuous forced labor over rough terrain. The Army of the South had finally broken through the center of the Army of the North and was rushing through the gap to capture a strategically important city. Its front stretched out like a fan, with regiments spread along the route back to the divisional transport columns and all the baggage that follows an army on the move. To its right, the shattered left of the Army of the North was retreating in mass, pursued by the Southern cavalry and bombarded by the Southern artillery until they had been pushed well beyond the limits of their last support. Then the fleeing forces paused to rest, while the excited commander of the pursuing force sent a telegram saying he had everything under control and was monitoring the situation.

Unluckily he did not observe that three miles to his right flank a flying column of Northern horse with a detachment of Ghoorkhas and British troops had been pushed round, as fast as the failing light allowed, to cut across the entire rear of the Southern Army, to break, as it were, all the ribs of the fan where they converged by striking at the transport, reserve ammunition, and artillery supplies. Their instructions were to go in, avoiding the few scouts who might not have been drawn off by the pursuit, and create sufficient excitement to impress the Southern Army with the wisdom of guarding their own flank and rear before they captured cities. It was a pretty manoeuvre, neatly carried out.

Unfortunately, he didn't notice that three miles to his right, a group of Northern cavalry along with a unit of Ghoorkhas and British troops had been sent around as quickly as the fading light allowed. Their mission was to cut across the entire rear of the Southern Army, hitting at the transportation, reserve ammunition, and artillery supplies, almost like breaking the ribs of a fan where they came together. They were instructed to move in, avoiding the few scouts who might not have been drawn away by the pursuit, and create enough chaos to make the Southern Army realize the importance of securing their own flanks and rear before taking cities. It was a clever maneuver, executed smoothly.

Speaking for the second division of the Southern Army, our first intimation of the attack was at twilight, when the artillery were labouring in deep sand, most of the escort were trying to help them out, and the main body of the infantry had gone on. A Noah’s Ark of elephants, camels, and the mixed menagerie of an Indian transport-train bubbled and squealed behind the guns when there appeared from nowhere in particular British infantry to the extent of three companies, who sprang to the heads of the gun-horses and brought all to a standstill amid oaths and cheers.

Speaking for the second division of the Southern Army, our first warning of the attack came at twilight, when the artillery was struggling in deep sand, most of the escort were trying to help them, and the main body of the infantry had moved on. A chaotic mix of elephants, camels, and a variety of animals from an Indian transport train was making noise behind the guns when suddenly, out of nowhere, three companies of British infantry appeared. They rushed to the front of the gun-horses and brought everything to a halt amid shouts and cheers.

‘How’s that, umpire?’ said the major commanding the attack, and with one voice the drivers and limber gunners answered ‘Hout!’ while the colonel of artillery sputtered.

‘How’s that, umpire?’ said the major leading the attack, and in unison, the drivers and limber gunners shouted ‘Hout!’ while the colonel of artillery fumed.

‘All your scouts are charging our main body,’ said the major. ‘Your flanks are unprotected for two miles. I think we’ve broken the back of this division. And listen,—there go the Ghoorkhas!’

‘All your scouts are charging our main force,’ said the major. ‘Your sides are unprotected for two miles. I think we’ve shattered this division. And listen—there go the Ghoorkhas!’

A weak fire broke from the rear-guard more than a mile away, and was answered by cheerful howlings. The Ghoorkhas, who should have swung clear of the second division, had stepped on its tail in the dark, but drawing off hastened to reach the next line of attack, which lay almost parallel to us five or six miles away.

A faint fire ignited in the rear-guard over a mile away and was met with excited howls. The Ghoorkhas, who were supposed to steer clear of the second division, accidentally tripped over its rear in the dark, but pulled back quickly to get to the next line of attack, which was almost parallel to us about five or six miles away.

Our column swayed and surged irresolutely,—three batteries, the divisional ammunition reserve, the baggage, and a section of the hospital and bearer corps. The commandant ruefully promised to report himself ‘cut up’ to the nearest umpire, and commending his cavalry and all other cavalry to the special care of Eblis, toiled on to resume touch with the rest of the division.

Our column swayed and surged uncertainly—three batteries, the divisional ammunition reserve, the baggage, and a section of the hospital and bearer corps. The commandant sadly promised to report himself as ‘cut up’ to the nearest umpire, and after asking Eblis to take special care of his cavalry and all other cavalry, he worked hard to reconnect with the rest of the division.

‘We’ll bivouac here to-night,’ said the major, ‘I have a notion that the Ghoorkhas will get caught. They may want us to re-form on. Stand easy till the transport gets away.’

‘We’ll camp here tonight,’ said the major, ‘I have a feeling the Ghoorkhas will get caught. They might want us to regroup. Hold tight until the transport leaves.’

A hand caught my beast’s bridle and led him out of the choking dust; a larger hand deftly canted me out of the saddle; and two of the hugest hands in the world received me sliding. Pleasant is the lot of the special correspondent who falls into such hands as those of Privates Mulvaney, Ortheris, and Learoyd.

A hand grabbed my horse's bridle and pulled him out of the thick dust; a bigger hand skillfully lifted me off the saddle; and two of the biggest hands in the world caught me as I slid down. It's a fortunate thing for a special correspondent to end up in the hands of Privates Mulvaney, Ortheris, and Learoyd.

‘An’ that’s all right,’ said the Irishman calmly. ‘We thought we’d find you somewheres here by. Is there anything av yours in the transport? Orth’ris ‘ll fetch ut out.’

‘That’s all right,’ said the Irishman calmly. ‘We thought we’d find you somewhere around here. Is there anything of yours in the transport? Or this will bring it out.’

Ortheris did ‘fetch ut out,’ from under the trunk of an elephant, in the shape of a servant and an animal both laden with medical comforts. The little man’s eyes sparkled.

Ortheris did ‘fetch it out,’ from under the trunk of an elephant, in the shape of a servant and an animal both loaded with medical supplies. The little man’s eyes sparkled.

‘If the brutil an’ licentious soldiery av these parts gets sight av the thruck,’ said Mulvaney, making practised investigations, ‘they’ll loot ev’rything. They’re bein’ fed on iron-filin’s an’ dog-biscuit these days, but glory’s no compensation for a belly-ache. Praise be, we’re here to protect you, sorr. Beer, sausage, bread (soft an’ that’s a cur’osity), soup in a tin, whisky by the smell av ut, an’ fowls! Mother av Moses, but ye take the field like a confectioner! ‘Tis scand’lus.’

“If the brutal and reckless soldiers around here spot the truck,” said Mulvaney, checking things out like a pro, “they’ll steal everything. They’re living on iron filings and dog biscuits these days, but glory doesn’t make up for a stomachache. Thank goodness we’re here to protect you, sir. Beer, sausage, soft bread (and that’s a rarity), canned soup, whisky you can smell, and chickens! Mother of Moses, but you’re heading into the field like a candy store! It’s scandalous.”

‘Ere’s a orficer,’ said Ortheris significantly. ‘When the sergent’s done lushin’ the privit may clean the pot.’

‘Here’s an officer,’ said Ortheris meaningfully. ‘When the sergeant’s finished drinking, the private can clean the pot.’

I bundled several things into Mulvaney’s haversack before the major’s hand fell on my shoulder and he said tenderly, ‘Requisitioned for the Queen’s service. Wolseley was quite wrong about special correspondents: they are the soldier’s best friends. Come and take pot-luck with us to-night.’

I packed a few things into Mulvaney’s backpack before the major put his hand on my shoulder and said gently, ‘Requisitioned for the Queen’s service. Wolseley was totally wrong about special correspondents: they’re the soldier’s best friends. Come and have dinner with us tonight.’

And so it happened amid laughter and shoutings that my well-considered commissariat melted away to reappear later at the mess-table, which was a waterproof sheet spread on the ground. The flying column had taken three days’ rations with it, and there be few things nastier than government rations—especially when government is experimenting with German toys. Erbsenwurst, tinned beef of surpassing tinniness, compressed vegetables, and meat-biscuits may be nourishing, but what Thomas Atkins needs is bulk in his inside. The major, assisted by his brother officers, purchased goats for the camp and so made the experiment of no effect. Long before the fatigue-party sent to collect brushwood had returned, the men were settled down by their valises, kettles and pots had appeared from the surrounding country and were dangling over fires as the kid and the compressed vegetable bubbled together; there rose a cheerful clinking of mess-tins; outrageous demands for ‘a little more stuffin’ with that there liver-wing;’ and gust on gust of chaff as pointed as a bayonet and as delicate as a gun-butt.

And so it happened, amid laughter and shouting, that my carefully planned food supplies disappeared, only to show up later at the mess table, which was just a waterproof sheet laid on the ground. The flying column had carried three days’ worth of rations, and there are few things worse than government rations—especially when the government is trying out German products. Pea sausage, tinned beef with an overwhelming tin taste, compressed vegetables, and meat biscuits might be nutritious, but what a soldier really needs is some hearty food. The major, with the help of his fellow officers, bought goats for the camp, which made the experiment pointless. Long before the fatigue party returned with firewood, the men had settled in by their bags, kettles and pots had appeared from the nearby area, and were hanging over fires as the kid and the compressed vegetables simmered together; there was a happy clinking of mess tins; outrageous requests for ‘a bit more stuffing with that liver wing;’ and wave after wave of banter as sharp as a bayonet and as blunt as a rifle butt.

‘The boys are in a good temper,’ said the major. ‘They’ll be singing presently. Well, a night like this is enough to keep them happy.’

‘The guys are in a good mood,’ said the major. ‘They’ll be singing soon. Well, a night like this is enough to keep them pleased.’

Over our heads burned the wonderful Indian stars, which are not all pricked in on one plane, but, preserving an orderly perspective, draw the eye through the velvet darkness of the void up to the barred doors of heaven itself. The earth was a gray shadow more unreal than the sky. We could hear her breathing lightly in the pauses between the howling of the jackals, the movement of the wind in the tamarisks, and the fitful mutter of musketry-fire leagues away to the left. A native woman from some unseen hut began to sing, the mail-train thundered past on its way to Delhi, and a roosting crow cawed drowsily. Then there was a belt-loosening silence about the fires, and the even breathing of the crowded earth took up the story.

Overhead, the amazing Indian stars shone brightly, not all flat on one plane, but creating a sense of depth that draws the eye through the velvety darkness of the space up to the barred gates of heaven itself. The earth was a gray shadow, even more unreal than the sky. We could hear her breathing softly in the breaks between the howling of the jackals, the rustling of the wind in the tamarisks, and the distant, sporadic sounds of gunfire miles away to the left. A native woman from some hidden hut started to sing, the mail train rumbled by on its way to Delhi, and a resting crow cawed sleepily. Then there was a heavy silence around the fires, and the steady breathing of the crowded earth continued the story.

The men, full fed, turned to tobacco and song,—their officers with them. The subaltern is happy who can win the approval of the musical critics in his regiment, and is honoured among the more intricate step-dancers. By him, as by him who plays cricket cleverly, Thomas Atkins will stand in time of need, when he will let a better officer go on alone. The ruined tombs of forgotten Mussulman saints heard the ballad of Agra Town, The Buffalo Battery, Marching to Kabul, The long, long Indian Day, The Place where the Punkah-coolie died, and that crashing chorus which announces,

The men, well-fed, turned to smoking and singing, along with their officers. The junior officer is lucky if he can earn the respect of the music critics in his regiment, and he’s recognized among the more skilled dancers. Just like the guy who plays cricket well, Thomas Atkins will back him up in times of need, even if it means letting a more qualified officer go ahead on their own. The crumbling tombs of forgotten Muslim saints heard the ballad of Agra Town, The Buffalo Battery, Marching to Kabul, The long, long Indian Day, The Place where the Punkah-coolie died, and that loud chorus that signals,

     Youth’s daring spirit, manhood’s fire,
       Firm hand and eagle eye,
     Must he acquire who would aspire
       To see the gray boar die.
     A young person's bold spirit, a man's passion,
       Steady hand and sharp focus,
     Must he gain who wants to achieve
       To see the gray boar fall.

To-day, of all those jovial thieves who appropriated my commissariat and lay and laughed round that water-proof sheet, not one remains. They went to camps that were not of exercise and battles without umpires. Burmah, the Soudan, and the frontier,—fever and fight,—took them in their time.

Today, of all those cheerful thieves who took my supplies and lay around that waterproof sheet, not one remains. They went to camps that weren't for training and battles without referees. Burma, the Sudan, and the frontier — fever and fighting — claimed them in their time.

I drifted across to the men’s fires in search of Mulvaney, whom I found strategically greasing his feet by the blaze. There is nothing particularly lovely in the sight of a private thus engaged after a long day’s march, but when you reflect on the exact proportion of the ‘might, majesty, dominion, and power’ of the British Empire which stands on those feet you take an interest in the proceedings.

I wandered over to the men’s campfires looking for Mulvaney, who I found carefully applying grease to his feet by the fire. There’s nothing especially nice about seeing a soldier doing that after a long day’s march, but when you think about how much of the ‘might, majesty, dominion, and power’ of the British Empire rests on those feet, you start to pay attention.

‘There’s a blister, bad luck to ut, on the heel,’ said Mulvaney. ‘I can’t touch ut. Prick ut out, little man.’

‘There’s a blister, bad luck on that, on the heel,’ said Mulvaney. ‘I can’t touch it. Prick it out, little man.’

Ortheris took out his house-wife, eased the trouble with a needle, stabbed Mulvaney in the calf with the same weapon, and was swiftly kicked into the fire.

Ortheris took out his sewing kit, fixed the issue with a needle, stabbed Mulvaney in the calf with the same tool, and was quickly kicked into the fire.

‘I’ve bruk the best av my toes over you, ye grinnin’ child av disruption,’ said Mulvaney, sitting cross-legged and nursing his feet; then seeing me, ‘Oh, ut’s you, sorr! Be welkim, an’ take that maraudin’ scutt’s place. Jock, hold him down on the cindhers for a bit.’

‘I’ve broken the best of my toes over you, you grinning child of chaos,’ said Mulvaney, sitting cross-legged and nursing his feet; then seeing me, ‘Oh, it’s you, sir! Welcome, and take that marauding scoundrel’s place. Jock, hold him down on the cinders for a bit.’

But Ortheris escaped and went elsewhere, as I took possession of the hollow he had scraped for himself and lined with his greatcoat. Learoyd on the other side of the fire grinned affably and in a minute fell fast asleep.

But Ortheris got away and went somewhere else, while I settled into the hollow he had dug out for himself and lined with his greatcoat. Learoyd, on the other side of the fire, grinned friendly and soon fell sound asleep.

‘There’s the height av politeness for you,’ said Mulvaney, lighting his pipe with a flaming branch. ‘But Jock’s eaten half a box av your sardines at wan gulp, an’ I think the tin too. What’s the best wid you, sorr, an’ how did you happen to be on the losin’ side this day whin we captured you?’

‘There’s peak politeness for you,’ said Mulvaney, lighting his pipe with a burning stick. ‘But Jock’s swallowed half a box of your sardines in one go, and I think the tin too. What’s up with you, sir, and how did you end up on the losing side today when we caught you?’

‘The Army of the South is winning all along the line,’ I said.

‘The Army of the South is winning everywhere,’ I said.

‘Then that line’s the hangman’s rope, savin’ your presence. You’ll learn to-morrow how we rethreated to dhraw thim on before we made thim trouble, an’ that’s what a woman does. By the same tokin, we’ll be attacked before the dawnin’ an’ ut would be betther not to slip your boots. How do I know that? By the light av pure reason. Here are three companies av us ever so far inside av the enemy’s flank an’ a crowd av roarin’, tarin’, squealin’ cavalry gone on just to turn out the whole hornet’s nest av them. Av course the enemy will pursue, by brigades like as not, an’ thin we’ll have to run for ut. Mark my words. I am av the opinion av Polonius whin he said, “Don’t fight wid ivry scutt for the pure joy av fightin’, but if you do, knock the nose av him first an’ frequint.” We ought to ha’ gone on an’ helped the Ghoorkhas.’

‘Then that line is the hangman’s rope, saving your presence. You’ll find out tomorrow how we planned to draw them on before we caused them any trouble, and that’s what a woman does. By the same token, we’ll be attacked before dawn, and it would be better not to slip on your boots. How do I know that? By the light of pure reason. Here are three companies of us way inside the enemy’s flank and a crowd of roaring, tearing, squealing cavalry gone just to stir up the whole hornet’s nest of them. Of course, the enemy will pursue, probably in brigades, and then we’ll have to run for it. Mark my words. I agree with Polonius when he said, “Don’t fight with every scutt for the pure joy of fighting, but if you do, knock his nose first and often.” We should have gone on and helped the Ghurkhas.’

‘But what do you know about Polonius?’ I demanded. This was a new side of Mulvaney’s character.

‘But what do you know about Polonius?’ I asked. This was a new side of Mulvaney’s character.

‘All that Shakespeare iver wrote an’ a dale more that the gallery shouted,’ said the man of war, carefully lacing his boots. ‘Did I not tell you av Silver’s theatre in Dublin, whin I was younger than I am now an’ a patron av the drama? Ould Silver wud never pay actor-man or woman their just dues, an’ by consequince his comp’nies was collapsible at the last minut. Thin the bhoys wud clamour to take a part, an’ oft as not ould Silver made them pay for the fun. Faith, I’ve seen Hamlut played wid a new black eye an’ the queen as full as a cornucopia. I remimber wanst Hogin that ‘listed in the Black Tyrone an’ was shot in South Africa, he sejuced ould Silver into givin’ him Hamlut’s part instid av me that had a fine fancy for rhetoric in those days. Av course I wint into the gallery an’ began to fill the pit wid other people’s hats, an’ I passed the time av day to Hogin walkin’ through Denmark like a hamstrung mule wid a pall on his back. “Hamlut,” sez I, “there’s a hole in your heel. Pull up your shtockin’s, Hamlut,” sez I, “Hamlut, Hamlut, for the love av decincy dhrop that skull an’ pull up your shtockin’s.” The whole house begun to tell him that. He stopped his soliloquishms mid-between. “My shtockin’s may be comin’ down or they may not,” sez he, screwin’ his eye into the gallery, for well he knew who I was. “But afther this performince is over me an’ the Ghost ‘ll trample the tripes out av you, Terence, wid your ass’s bray!” An’ that’s how I come to know about Hamlut. Eyah! Those days, those days! Did you iver have onendin’ devilmint an’ nothin’ to pay for it in your life, sorr?’

‘All that Shakespeare ever wrote and a lot more that the audience shouted,’ said the sailor, carefully lacing his boots. ‘Did I not tell you about Silver’s theater in Dublin, when I was younger than I am now and a supporter of the drama? Old Silver would never pay the actors their fair share, and as a result, his companies would collapse at the last minute. Then the guys would scramble to get a part, and often old Silver made them pay for the privilege. Honestly, I’ve seen Hamlet performed with a new black eye and the queen as drunk as can be. I remember once Hogin, who signed up with the Black Tyrone and was shot in South Africa, convinced old Silver to give him Hamlet’s part instead of me, who had a real flair for rhetoric back then. Of course, I went into the gallery and started filling the pit with other people’s hats, and I spent my time telling Hogin he was walking through Denmark like a clumsy mule with a burden on his back. “Hamlet,” I said, “there’s a hole in your heel. Pull up your socks, Hamlet,” I told him, “Hamlet, Hamlet, for the love of decency drop that skull and pull up your socks.” The whole theater started shouting that. He stopped his soliloquies mid-sentence. “My socks may be falling down or they may not,” he said, squinting up at the gallery, because he knew exactly who I was. “But after this performance is over, me and the Ghost will trample the life out of you, Terence, with your donkey’s bray!” And that’s how I came to know about Hamlet. Ah! Those days, those days! Did you ever have endless trouble and nothing to pay for it in your life, sir?’

‘Never, without having to pay,’ I said.

‘Never, without having to pay,’ I said.

‘That’s thrue! ‘Tis mane whin you considher on ut; but ut’s the same wid horse or fut. A headache if you dhrink, an’ a belly-ache if you eat too much, an’ a heart-ache to kape all down. Faith, the beast only gets the colic, an’ he’s the lucky man.’

‘That's true! It's a pain when you think about it; but it's the same with horses or people. A headache if you drink, a stomach ache if you eat too much, and a heartache to hold it all in. Honestly, the beast just gets colic, and he's the lucky one.’

He dropped his head and stared into the fire, fingering his moustache the while. From the far side of the bivouac the voice of Corbet-Nolan, senior subaltern of B company, uplifted itself in an ancient and much appreciated song of sentiment, the men moaning melodiously behind him.

He lowered his head and looked into the fire, absentmindedly twirling his mustache. From the other side of the camp, Corbet-Nolan, the senior subaltern of B company, broke into an old and well-loved sentimental song, with the men harmonizing softly behind him.

     The north wind blew coldly, she drooped from that hour,
     My own little Kathleen, my sweet little Kathleen,
     Kathleen, my Kathleen, Kathleen O’Moore!
     The north wind blew coldly, she drooped from that hour,  
     My own little Kathleen, my sweet little Kathleen,  
     Kathleen, my Kathleen, Kathleen O’Moore!

With forty-five O’s in the last word: even at that distance you might have cut the soft South Irish accent with a shovel.

With forty-five O’s in the last word: even from that far away, you could’ve easily sliced through the soft Southern Irish accent with a shovel.

‘For all we take we must pay, but the price is cruel high,’ murmured Mulvaney when the chorus had ceased.

‘For everything we take, we must pay, but the price is incredibly high,’ murmured Mulvaney when the chorus had stopped.

‘What’s the trouble?’ I said gently, for I knew that he was a man of an inextinguishable sorrow.

‘What’s wrong?’ I said softly, knowing he was a man of endless grief.

‘Hear now,’ said he. ‘Ye know what I am now. I know what I mint to be at the beginnin’ av my service. I’ve tould you time an’ again, an’ what I have not Dinah Shadd has. An’ what am I? Oh, Mary Mother av Hiven, an ould dhrunken, untrustable baste av a privit that has seen the reg’ment change out from colonel to drummer-boy, not wanst or twice, but scores av times! Ay, scores! An’ me not so near gettin’ promotion as in the first! An’ me livin’ on an’ kapin’ clear av clink, not by my own good conduck, but the kindness av some orf’cer-bhoy young enough to be son to me! Do I not know ut? Can I not tell whin I’m passed over at p’rade, tho’ I’m rockin’ full av liquor an’ ready to fall all in wan piece, such as even a suckin’ child might see, bekaze, “Oh, ‘tis only ould Mulvaney!” An’ whin I’m let off in ord’ly-room through some thrick of the tongue an’ a ready answer an’ the ould man’s mercy, is ut smilin’ I feel whin I fall away an’ go back to Dinah Shadd, thryin’ to carry ut all off as a joke? Not I! ‘Tis hell to me, dumb hell through ut all; an’ next time whin the fit comes I will be as bad again. Good cause the reg’ment has to know me for the best soldier in ut. Better cause have I to know mesilf for the worst man. I’m only fit to tache the new drafts what I’ll niver learn mesilf; an’ I am sure, as tho’ I heard ut, that the minut wan av these pink-eyed recruities gets away from my “Mind ye now,” an’ “Listen to this, Jim, bhoy,”—sure I am that the sergint houlds me up to him for a warnin’. So I tache, as they say at musketry-instruction, by direct and ricochet fire. Lord be good to me, for I have stud some throuble!’

"Hear me out," he said. "You know who I am now. I know what I wanted to achieve when I started my service. I've told you time and again, and what I haven't said, Dinah Shadd has. And what am I? Oh, Mary Mother of Heaven, just an old drunken, unreliable fool of a private who's seen the regiment change from colonel to drummer boy, not once or twice, but scores of times! Yes, scores! And I’m not even close to getting a promotion like I was at the beginning! And I’m living on and managing to stay out of jail, not because of my own good behavior, but thanks to some young officer boy who’s young enough to be my son! Don’t I know it? Can't I tell when I'm passed over at parade, even though I'm full of liquor and about to fall apart, as even a sucking child might notice, because, "Oh, it’s just old Mulvaney!" And when I’m let off in the orderly room through some quick talk and a ready answer and the old man’s mercy, do I feel like smiling when I walk away and go back to Dinah Shadd, trying to play it off as a joke? Not at all! It’s hell for me, pure hell through all of this; and the next time the urge comes, I’ll be just as bad again. The regiment has good reason to know me as the best soldier in it. I have even better reason to see myself as the worst man. I’m only fit to teach the new recruits what I’ll never learn myself; and I’m sure, as if I could hear it, that any minute one of these pink-eyed recruits gets away from my “Mind you now,” and “Listen to this, Jim, boy,”—I’m sure the sergeant holds me up to him as an example. So I teach, as they say at musketry instruction, by direct and ricochet fire. Lord help me, for I've had my share of trouble!"

‘Lie down and go to sleep,’ said I, not being able to comfort or advise. ‘You’re the best man in the regiment, and, next to Ortheris, the biggest fool. Lie down and wait till we’re attacked. What force will they turn out? Guns, think you?’

‘Lie down and go to sleep,’ I said, unable to provide comfort or advice. ‘You’re the best guy in the regiment, and, next to Ortheris, the biggest fool. Lie down and wait until we’re attacked. What force do you think they’ll bring? Guns, maybe?’

‘Try that wid your lorrds an’ ladies, twistin’ an’ turnin’ the talk, tho’ you mint ut well. Ye cud say nothin’ to help me, an’ yet ye niver knew what cause I had to be what I am.’

‘Try that with your lords and ladies, twisting and turning the conversation, though you mean it well. You could say nothing to help me, and yet you never knew what reason I had to be who I am.’

‘Begin at the beginning and go on to the end,’ I said royally. ‘But rake up the fire a bit first.’

‘Start at the beginning and keep going until the end,’ I said grandly. ‘But add some logs to the fire first.’

I passed Ortheris’s bayonet for a poker.

I grabbed Ortheris’s bayonet and used it as a poker.

‘That shows how little we know what we do,’ said Mulvaney, putting it aside. ‘Fire takes all the heart out av the steel, an’ the next time, may be, that our little man is fighting for his life his bradawl ‘ll break, an’ so you’ll ha’ killed him, manin’ no more than to kape yourself warm. ‘Tis a recruity’s thrick that. Pass the clanin’-rod, sorr.’

‘That shows how little we understand what we're doing,’ said Mulvaney, setting it aside. ‘Fire takes all the strength out of the steel, and the next time our little guy is fighting for his life, his bradawl might break, and then you’ll have killed him, just to keep yourself warm. That’s a rookie’s trick. Pass the cleaning rod, sir.’

I snuggled down abased; and after an interval the voice of Mulvaney began.

I huddled down, feeling low; and after a moment, Mulvaney's voice started.

‘Did I iver tell you how Dinah Shadd came to be wife av mine?’

‘Did I ever tell you how Dinah Shadd became my wife?’

I dissembled a burning anxiety that I had felt for some months—ever since Dinah Shadd, the strong, the patient, and the infinitely tender, had of her own good love and free will washed a shirt for me, moving in a barren land where washing was not.

I hid a deep anxiety I’d felt for months—ever since Dinah Shadd, strong, patient, and incredibly tender, had willingly washed a shirt for me, working in a desolate place where there was no access to washing.

‘I can’t remember,’ I said casually. ‘Was it before or after you made love to Annie Bragin, and got no satisfaction?’

‘I can’t remember,’ I said nonchalantly. ‘Was it before or after you hooked up with Annie Bragin and got nothing out of it?’

The story of Annie Bragin is written in another place. It is one of the many less respectable episodes in Mulvaney’s chequered career.

The story of Annie Bragin is documented elsewhere. It's one of the many less respectable events in Mulvaney’s complicated career.

‘Before—before—long before, was that business av Annie Bragin an’ the corp’ril’s ghost. Niver woman was the worse for me whin I had married Dinah. There’s a time for all things, an’ I know how to kape all things in place—barrin’ the dhrink, that kapes me in my place wid no hope av comin’ to be aught else.’

‘Before—before—long before, was that business of Annie Bragin and the corporal’s ghost. No woman was worse off because of me when I had married Dinah. There’s a time for everything, and I know how to keep everything in its place—except for the drink, which keeps me in my place with no hope of becoming anything else.’

‘Begin at the beginning,’ I insisted. ‘Mrs. Mulvaney told me that you married her when you were quartered in Krab Bokhar barracks.’

‘Start from the beginning,’ I insisted. ‘Mrs. Mulvaney told me that you married her when you were stationed at Krab Bokhar barracks.’

‘An’ the same is a cess-pit,’ said Mulvaney piously. ‘She spoke thrue, did Dinah. ‘Twas this way. Talkin’ av that, have ye iver fallen in love, sorr?’

‘And the same is a cess-pit,’ Mulvaney said seriously. ‘Dinah was right. It happened like this. Speaking of that, have you ever fallen in love, sir?’

I preserved the silence of the damned. Mulvaney continued—

I kept the silence of the damned. Mulvaney carried on—

‘Thin I will assume that ye have not. I did. In the days av my youth, as I have more than wanst tould you, I was a man that filled the eye an’ delighted the sowl av women. Niver man was hated as I have bin. Niver man was loved as I—no, not within half a day’s march av ut! For the first five years av my service, whin I was what I wud give my sowl to be now, I tuk whatever was within my reach an’ digested ut—an that’s more than most men can say. Dhrink I tuk, an’ ut did me no harm. By the Hollow av Hiven, I cud play wid four women at wanst, an’ kape them from findin’ out anythin’ about the other three, an’ smile like a full-blown marigold through ut all. Dick Coulhan, av the battery we’ll have down on us to-night, could drive his team no betther than I mine, an’ I hild the worser cattle! An’ so I lived, an’ so I was happy till afther that business wid Annie Bragin—she that turned me off as cool as a meat-safe, an’ taught me where I stud in the mind av an honest woman. ‘Twas no sweet dose to swallow.

‘Then I will assume that you haven’t. I did. In my younger days, as I have told you more than once, I was a man who caught the eye and delighted the soul of women. Never has a man been hated as I have been. Never has a man been loved as I was—no, not within half a day’s march of it! For the first five years of my service, when I was what I would give my soul to be now, I took whatever was within my reach and enjoyed it—and that’s more than most men can say. I drank, and it did me no harm. By the Hollow of Heaven, I could juggle four women at once, keep them from finding out about the other three, and smile like a full-blown marigold through it all. Dick Coulhan, from the battery we’ll have on us tonight, could drive his team no better than I could mine, and I had the worse cattle! And so I lived, and so I was happy until after that business with Annie Bragin—she who dismissed me as coolly as a meat-safe, and taught me where I stood in the mind of an honest woman. It was no sweet pill to swallow.

‘Afther that I sickened awhile an’ tuk thought to my reg’mental work; conceiting mesilf I wud study an’ be a sergint, an’ a major-gineral twinty minutes afther that. But on top av my ambitiousness there was an empty place in my sowl, an’ me own opinion av mesilf cud not fill ut. Sez I to mesilf, “Terence, you’re a great man an’ the best set-up in the reg’mint. Go on an’ get promotion.” Sez mesilf to me, “What for?” Sez I to mesilf, “For the glory av ut!” Sez mesilf to me, “Will that fill these two strong arrums av yours, Terence?” “Go to the devil,” sez I to mesilf. “Go to the married lines,” sez mesilf to me. “‘Tis the same thing,” sez I to mesilf. “Av you’re the same man, ut is,” said mesilf to me; an’ wid that I considhered on ut a long while. Did you iver feel that way, sorr?’

‘After that, I got sick for a bit and started thinking about my military work; I imagined that I would study and become a sergeant, and a major-general twenty minutes later. But alongside my ambition, there was an empty spot in my soul that my own opinion of myself couldn't fill. I said to myself, “Terence, you’re a great guy and the best in the regiment. Go ahead and get promoted.” I replied to myself, “Why?” I said to myself, “For the glory of it!” I asked, “Will that fill these two strong arms of yours, Terence?” “Go to hell,” I told myself. “Go to the married quarters,” I replied. “It’s the same thing,” I said to myself. “If you’re the same man, it is,” I argued with myself; and with that, I thought about it for a long time. Have you ever felt that way, sir?’

I snored gently, knowing that if Mulvaney were uninterrupted he would go on. The clamour from the bivouac fires beat up to the stars, as the rival singers of the companies were pitted against each other.

I snored softly, aware that if Mulvaney wasn't interrupted he would keep going. The noise from the campfires rose up to the stars, as the competing singers from the companies went head-to-head.

‘So I felt that way an’ a bad time ut was. Wanst, bein’ a fool, I wint into the married lines more for the sake av spakin’ to our ould colour-sergint Shadd than for any thruck wid women-folk. I was a corp’ril then—rejuced aftherwards, but a corp’ril then. I’ve got a photograft av mesilf to prove ut. “You’ll take a cup av tay wid us?” sez Shadd. “I will that,” I sez, “tho’ tay is not my divarsion.”

‘So I felt that way, and it was a tough time. Once, being a fool, I went into the married quarters more for the sake of talking to our old color sergeant Shadd than for any interest in women. I was a corporal then—reduced afterwards, but a corporal then. I’ve got a photograph of myself to prove it. “Will you have a cup of tea with us?” says Shadd. “I will,” I say, “although tea isn’t my thing.”

‘“‘Twud be better for you if ut were,” sez ould Mother Shadd, an’ she had ought to know, for Shadd, in the ind av his service, dhrank bung-full each night.

‘“It would be better for you if it were,” said old Mother Shadd, and she should know, because Shadd, at the end of his service, drank to excess every night.

‘Wid that I tuk off my gloves—there was pipe-clay in thim, so that they stud alone—an’ pulled up my chair, lookin’ round at the china ornaments an’ bits av things in the Shadds’ quarters. They were things that belonged to a man, an’ no camp-kit, here to-day an’ dishipated next. “You’re comfortable in this place, sergint,” sez I. “‘Tis the wife that did ut, boy,” sez he, pointin’ the stem av his pipe to ould Mother Shadd, an’ she smacked the top av his bald head apon the compliment. “That manes you want money,” sez she.

‘With that, I took off my gloves—there was pipe clay in them, so they stood on their own—and pulled up my chair, looking around at the china ornaments and various items in the Shadds’ quarters. They were things that belonged to a man, not just camping gear that’s here today and gone tomorrow. “You’re comfortable in this place, sergeant,” I said. “It’s the wife who made it nice, boy,” he replied, pointing the stem of his pipe at old Mother Shadd, who gave the top of his bald head a smack in response to the compliment. “That means you want money,” she said.

‘An’ thin—an’ thin whin the kettle was to be filled, Dinah came in—my Dinah—her sleeves rowled up to the elbow an’ her hair in a winkin’ glory over her forehead, the big blue eyes beneath twinklin’ like stars on a frosty night, an’ the tread av her two feet lighter than waste-paper from the colonel’s basket in ord’ly-room whin ut’s emptied. Bein’ but a shlip av a girl she went pink at seein’ me, an’ I twisted me moustache an’ looked at a picture forninst the wall. Niver show a woman that ye care the snap av a finger for her, an’ begad she’ll come bleatin’ to your boot-heels!’

‘And thin— and then when the kettle was ready to be filled, Dinah came in—my Dinah—her sleeves rolled up to the elbow and her hair in a shining glory over her forehead, the big blue eyes beneath sparkling like stars on a frosty night, and the sound of her two feet lighter than waste paper from the colonel’s basket in the orderly room when it’s emptied. Being just a slip of a girl, she blushed at seeing me, and I twisted my mustache and looked at a picture on the wall. Never show a woman that you care the snap of a finger for her, and by golly, she’ll come running to your boot heels!’

‘I suppose that’s why you followed Annie Bragin till everybody in the married quarters laughed at you,’ said I, remembering that unhallowed wooing and casting off the disguise of drowsiness.

‘I guess that’s why you followed Annie Bragin until everyone in the married quarters laughed at you,’ I said, recalling that forbidden courtship and dropping the act of pretending to be sleepy.

‘I’m layin’ down the gin’ral theory av the attack,’ said Mulvaney, driving his boot into the dying fire. ‘If you read the Soldier’s Pocket Book, which niver any soldier reads, you’ll see that there are exceptions. Whin Dinah was out av the door (an’ ‘twas as tho’ the sunlight had shut too)—“Mother av Hiven, sergint,” sez I, “but is that your daughter?”—“I’ve believed that way these eighteen years,” sez ould Shadd, his eyes twinklin’; “but Mrs. Shadd has her own opinion, like iv’ry woman,”—“‘Tis wid yours this time, for a mericle,” sez Mother Shadd. “Thin why in the name av fortune did I niver see her before?” sez I. “Bekaze you’ve been thrapesin’ round wid the married women these three years past. She was a bit av a child till last year, an’ she shot up wid the spring,” sez ould Mother Shadd. “I’ll thrapese no more,” sez I. “D’you mane that?” sez ould Mother Shadd, lookin’ at me side-ways like a hen looks at a hawk whin the chickens are runnin’ free. “Try me, an’ tell,” sez I. Wid that I pulled on my gloves, dhrank off the tay, an’ went out av the house as stiff as at gin’ral p’rade, for well I knew that Dinah Shadd’s eyes were in the small av my back out av the scullery window. Faith! that was the only time I mourned I was not a cav’lry-man for the pride av the spurs to jingle.

"I’m laying out the general theory of the attack," said Mulvaney, kicking the dying fire with his boot. "If you look at the Soldier’s Pocket Book, which no soldier ever reads, you’ll see there are exceptions. When Dinah was at the door (and it felt like the sunlight had closed up)—'Mother of Heaven, Sergeant,' I said, 'is that your daughter?'—'I’ve believed that for eighteen years,' said old Shadd, his eyes sparkling; 'but Mrs. Shadd has her own opinion, like every woman,'—'This time it agrees with yours for a miracle,' said Mother Shadd. 'Then why in the world have I never seen her before?' I asked. 'Because you’ve been hanging around with married women these past three years. She was just a child until last year, and she shot up with the spring,' said old Mother Shadd. 'I won’t hang around anymore,' I said. 'Do you mean that?' asked old Mother Shadd, looking at me sideways like a hen watches a hawk when the chicks are running free. 'Try me and see,' I said. With that, I put on my gloves, drank the tea, and left the house standing tall like I was on a general's parade, because I knew Dinah Shadd’s eyes were on the small of my back from the scullery window. Faith! That was the only time I regretted not being a cavalryman for the pride of the spurs jingling."

‘I wint out to think, an’ I did a powerful lot av thinkin’, but ut all came round to that shlip av a girl in the dotted blue dhress, wid the blue eyes an’ the sparkil in them. Thin I kept off canteen, an’ I kept to the married quarthers, or near by, on the chanst av meetin’ Dinah. Did I meet her? Oh, my time past, did I not; wid a lump in my throat as big as my valise an’ my heart goin’ like a farrier’s forge on a Saturday morning? ‘Twas “Good day to ye, Miss Dinah,” an’ “Good day t’you, corp’ril,” for a week or two, and divil a bit further could I get bekaze av the respect I had to that girl that I cud ha’ broken betune finger an’ thumb.’

'I went out to think, and I did a lot of thinking, but it all came back to that slip of a girl in the dotted blue dress, with the blue eyes and the sparkle in them. Then I stayed away from the canteen, and I kept to the married quarters, or nearby, on the chance of running into Dinah. Did I meet her? Oh, how time passed, yes I did; with a lump in my throat as big as my suitcase and my heart pounding like a blacksmith's forge on a Saturday morning? It was “Good day to you, Miss Dinah,” and “Good day to you, corporal,” for a week or two, and not a bit further could I get because of the respect I had for that girl that I could have broken between my finger and thumb.'

Here I giggled as I recalled the gigantic figure of Dinah Shadd when she handed me my shirt.

Here I laughed as I remembered the huge figure of Dinah Shadd when she handed me my shirt.

‘Ye may laugh,’ grunted Mulvaney. ‘But I’m speakin’ the trut’, an ‘tis you that are in fault. Dinah was a girl that wud ha’ taken the imperiousness out av the Duchess av Clonmel in those days. Flower hand, foot av shod air, an’ the eyes av the livin’ mornin’ she had that is my wife to-day—ould Dinah, and niver aught else than Dinah Shadd to me.

‘You can laugh,’ Mulvaney grunted. ‘But I’m speaking the truth, and it’s you who are at fault. Dinah was a girl who would have taken the arrogance out of the Duchess of Clonmel back then. She had a delicate hand, graceful feet, and the eyes of a living morning—my wife today, old Dinah, and nothing else but Dinah Shadd to me.

‘’Twas after three weeks standin’ off an’ on, an’ niver makin’ headway excipt through the eyes, that a little drummer-boy grinned in me face whin I had admonished him wid the buckle av my belt for riotin’ all over the place. “An’ I’m not the only wan that doesn’t kape to barricks,” sez he. I tuk him by the scruff av his neck,—my heart was hung on a hair-thrigger those days, you will onderstand—an’ “Out wid ut,” sez I, “or I’ll lave no bone av you unbreakable.”—“Speak to Dempsey,” sez he howlin’. “Dempsey which?” sez I, “ye unwashed limb av Satan.”—“Av the Bob-tailed Dhragoons,” sez he. “He’s seen her home from her aunt’s house in the civil lines four times this fortnight.”—“Child!” sez I, dhroppin’ him, “your tongue’s stronger than your body. Go to your quarters. I’m sorry I dhressed you down.”

"It was after three weeks of standing around, never making any progress except through the eyes, that a little drummer boy grinned at me when I had scolded him with the buckle of my belt for causing chaos everywhere. 'And I'm not the only one who doesn’t stay in barracks,' he said. I grabbed him by the scruff of his neck—my emotions were on edge those days, you understand—and said, 'Get out of here, or I’ll leave no bone of you unbreakable.' 'Talk to Dempsey,' he shouted. 'Which Dempsey?' I asked, 'you unwashed limb of Satan.' 'Of the Bob-tailed Dragoons,' he replied. 'He’s walked her home from her aunt’s house in the civil lines four times this fortnight.' 'Child!' I said, dropping him, 'your tongue is stronger than your body. Go to your quarters. I'm sorry I scolded you.'"

‘At that I went four ways to wanst huntin’ Dempsey. I was mad to think that wid all my airs among women I shud ha’ been chated by a basin-faced fool av a cav’lry-man not fit to trust on a trunk. Presintly I found him in our lines—the Bobtails was quartered next us—an’ a tallowy, topheavy son av a she-mule he was wid his big brass spurs an’ his plastrons on his epigastrons an’ all. But he niver flinched a hair.

‘At that, I went in all directions searching for Dempsey. I was furious to think that with all my charm among women I had been fooled by a thick-headed cavalry man not worth trusting with a suitcase. Soon, I found him in our camp—the Bobtails were stationed next to us—and what a greasy, oversized son of a mule he was with his big brass spurs and his chest plates on his stomach and all. But he didn’t flinch at all.

‘“A word wid you, Dempsey,” sez I. “You’ve walked wid Dinah Shadd four times this fortnight gone.”

“Can I have a word with you, Dempsey?” I said. “You’ve walked with Dinah Shadd four times this past two weeks.”

‘“What’s that to you?” sez he. “I’ll walk forty times more, an’ forty on top av that, ye shovel-futted clod-breakin’ infantry lance-corp’ril.”

‘“What’s that to you?” he said. “I’ll walk forty times more, and forty on top of that, you shovel-footed, clod-breaking infantry lance corporal.”’

‘Before I cud gyard he had his gloved fist home on my cheek an’ down I went full-sprawl. “Will that content you?” sez he, blowin’ on his knuckles for all the world like a Scots Greys orf’cer. “Content!” sez I. “For your own sake, man, take off your spurs, peel your jackut, an’ onglove. ‘Tis the beginnin’ av the overture; stand up!”

‘Before I could guard myself, he had his gloved fist on my cheek and down I went, sprawled out. “Is that enough for you?” he said, blowing on his knuckles like a Scottish officer. “Enough!” I said. “For your own sake, man, take off your spurs, remove your jacket, and take off your gloves. This is just the beginning; stand up!”

‘He stud all he know, but he niver peeled his jackut, an’ his shoulders had no fair play. I was fightin’ for Dinah Shadd an’ that cut on my cheek. What hope had he forninst me? “Stand up,” sez I, time an’ again whin he was beginnin’ to quarter the ground an’ gyard high an’ go large. “This isn’t ridin’-school,” I sez. “O man, stand up an’ let me get in at ye.” But whin I saw he wud be runnin’ about, I grup his shtock in my left an’ his waist-belt in my right an’ swung him clear to my right front, head undher, he hammerin’ my nose till the wind was knocked out av him on the bare ground. “Stand up,” sez I, “or I’ll kick your head into your chest!” and I wud ha’ done ut too, so ragin’ mad I was.

‘He studied all he knew, but he never took off his jacket, and his shoulders didn’t have a fair chance. I was fighting for Dinah Shadd and that cut on my cheek. What hope did he have against me? “Stand up,” I said, time and again when he started to circle the ground, guard high and moving around. “This isn’t a riding school,” I said. “Oh man, stand up and let me get at you.” But when I saw he would be running around, I grabbed his stock with my left hand and his waist belt with my right and swung him clear to my right front, head down, him smashing my nose until he knocked the wind out of himself on the bare ground. “Stand up,” I said, “or I’ll kick your head into your chest!” and I would have done it too, so furious I was.

‘“My collar-bone’s bruk,” sez he. “Help me back to lines. I’ll walk wid her no more.” So I helped him back.’

‘“My collarbone’s broken,” he said. “Help me back to the lines. I won’t walk with her anymore.” So I helped him back.’

‘And was his collar-bone broken?’ I asked, for I fancied that only Learoyd could neatly accomplish that terrible throw.

‘Was his collarbone broken?’ I asked, because I thought only Learoyd could pull off that awful throw so perfectly.

‘He pitched on his left shoulder-point. Ut was. Next day the news was in both barricks, an’ whin I met Dinah Shadd wid a cheek on me like all the reg’mintal tailor’s samples there was no “Good mornin’, corp’ril,” or aught else. “An’ what have I done, Miss Shadd,” sez I, very bould, plantin’ mesilf forninst her, “that ye should not pass the time of day?”

‘He fell on his left shoulder. It was. The next day, the news was in both barracks, and when I saw Dinah Shadd with a cheek like all the regiment's tailor samples, there was no “Good morning, corporal,” or anything else. “And what have I done, Miss Shadd,” I said, quite boldly, standing in front of her, “that you won’t even say hello?”

‘“Ye’ve half-killed rough-rider Dempsey,” sez she, her dear blue eyes fillin’ up.

"“You’ve almost killed rough-rider Dempsey,” she said, her dear blue eyes filling up.

‘“May be,” sez I. “Was he a friend av yours that saw ye home four times in the fortnight?”

‘“Maybe,” I said. “Was he a friend of yours who walked you home four times in the last two weeks?”

‘“Yes,” sez she, but her mouth was down at the corners. “An’—an’ what’s that to you?” she sez.

‘“Yes,” she said, but her mouth was turned down at the corners. “And—what’s that to you?” she asked.

‘“Ask Dempsey,” sez I, purtendin’ to go away.

‘“Ask Dempsey,” I said, pretending to leave.

‘“Did you fight for me then, ye silly man?” she sez, tho’ she knew ut all along.

"Did you fight for me then, you silly man?" she says, even though she knew it all along.

‘“Who else?” sez I, an’ I tuk wan pace to the front.

“Who else?” I said, stepping forward.

‘“I wasn’t worth ut,” sez she, fingerin’ in her apron,

"I wasn't worth it," she said, fiddling with her apron,

‘“That’s for me to say,” sez I. “Shall I say ut?”

‘“That’s for me to decide,” I said. “Should I say it?”

‘“Yes,” sez she in a saint’s whisper, an’ at that I explained mesilf; and she tould me what ivry man that is a man, an’ many that is a woman, hears wanst in his life.

‘“Yes,” she said in a saintly whisper, and at that I explained myself; and she told me what every man who is a man, and many who are women, hears once in their life.

‘“But what made ye cry at startin’, Dinah, darlin’?’” sez I.

‘“But what made you cry at the beginning, Dinah, darling?’” I said.

‘“Your—your bloody cheek,” sez she, duckin’ her little head down on my sash (I was on duty for the day) an’ whimperin’ like a sorrowful angil.

‘“Your—your bloody cheek,” she said, ducking her little head down on my sash (I was on duty for the day) and whimpering like a sad angel.

‘Now a man cud take that two ways. I tuk ut as pleased me best an’ my first kiss wid ut. Mother av Innocence! but I kissed her on the tip av the nose an’ undher the eye; an’ a girl that let’s a kiss come tumble-ways like that has never been kissed before. Take note av that, sorr. Thin we wint hand in hand to ould Mother Shadd like two little childher, an’ she said ‘twas no bad thing, an’ ould Shadd nodded behind his pipe, an’ Dinah ran away to her own room. That day I throd on rollin’ clouds. All earth was too small to hould me. Begad, I cud ha’ hiked the sun out av the sky for a live coal to my pipe, so magnificent I was. But I tuk recruities at squad-drill instid, an’ began wid general battalion advance whin I shud ha’ been balance-steppin’ them. Eyah! that day! that day!’

‘Now a guy could interpret that in two ways. I took it in a way that suited me best, and my first kiss with her. Oh, the innocence! But I kissed her on the tip of the nose and under the eye; and a girl who lets a kiss come tumbling like that has never been kissed before. Keep that in mind, sir. Then we went hand in hand to old Mother Shadd like two little kids, and she said it was no bad thing, and old Shadd nodded behind his pipe, and Dinah ran off to her own room. That day I was walking on rolling clouds. The whole world felt too small for me. Honestly, I could have pulled the sun out of the sky for a live coal for my pipe, I felt so amazing. But instead, I got my act together at squad drill and started with the general battalion advance when I should have been balancing my steps. Oh! that day! that day!’

A very long pause. ‘Well?’ said I.

A very long pause. "Well?" I said.

‘’Twas all wrong,’ said Mulvaney, with an enormous sigh. ‘An’ I know that ev’ry bit av ut was my own foolishness. That night I tuk maybe the half av three pints—not enough to turn the hair of a man in his natural senses. But I was more than half drunk wid pure joy, an’ that canteen beer was so much whisky to me. I can’t tell how it came about, but BEKAZE I had no thought for anywan except Dinah, BEKAZE I hadn’t slipped her little white arms from my neck five minuts, BEKAZE the breath of her kiss was not gone from my mouth, I must go through the married lines on my way to quarters an’ I must stay talkin’ to a red-headed Mullingar heifer av a girl, Judy Sheehy, that was daughter to Mother Sheehy, the wife of Nick Sheehy, the canteen-sergint—the Black Curse av Shielygh be on the whole brood that are above groun’ this day!

“It was all wrong,” Mulvaney said with a huge sigh. “And I know every bit of it was my own foolishness. That night I had maybe half of three pints—not enough to get a man in his right mind tipsy. But I was more than half drunk with pure joy, and that canteen beer felt like whiskey to me. I can’t explain how it happened, but BECAUSE I had no thought for anyone except Dinah, BECAUSE I hadn’t slipped her little white arms from my neck for even five minutes, BECAUSE the breath of her kiss was still on my lips, I had to walk through the married lines on my way to quarters and I ended up talking to a red-headed Mullingar girl, Judy Sheehy, who was the daughter of Mother Sheehy, wife of Nick Sheehy, the canteen sergeant—the Black Curse of Shielygh be on the whole brood that are above ground this day!”

“‘An’ what are ye houldin’ your head that high for, corp’ril?” sez Judy. “Come in an’ thry a cup av tay,” she sez, standin’ in the doorway. Bein’ an ontrustable fool, an’ thinkin’ av anything but tay, I wint.

“‘And why are you holding your head up so high, Corporal?” says Judy. “Come in and try a cup of tea,” she says, standing in the doorway. Being an unreliable fool and thinking of anything but tea, I went.

‘“Mother’s at canteen,” sez Judy, smoothin’ the hair av hers that was like red snakes, an’ lookin’ at me cornerways out av her green cats’ eyes. “Ye will not mind, corp’ril?”

“Mom's at the canteen,” Judy said, smoothing her hair that was like red snakes and looking at me sideways with her green cat-like eyes. “You won’t mind, right, corporal?”

‘“I can endure,” sez I; ould Mother Sheehy bein’ no divarsion av mine, nor her daughter too. Judy fetched the tea things an’ put thim on the table, leanin’ over me very close to get thim square. I dhrew back, thinkin’ av Dinah.

“I can handle it,” I said; old Mother Sheehy was no distraction for me, nor was her daughter. Judy brought the tea set and placed it on the table, leaning over me closely to get everything lined up. I pulled back, thinking of Dinah.

‘“Is ut afraid you are av a girl alone?” sez Judy.

“Are you afraid to be a girl alone?” says Judy.

‘“No,” sez I. “Why should I be?”

“No,” I said. “Why should I be?”

‘“That rests wid the girl,” sez Judy, dhrawin’ her chair next to mine.

“That rests with the girl,” said Judy, pulling her chair next to mine.

‘“Thin there let ut rest,” sez I; an’ thinkin’ I’d been a trifle onpolite, I sez, “The tay’s not quite sweet enough for my taste. Put your little finger in the cup, Judy. ‘Twill make ut necthar.”

‘“Then let it rest there,” I said; and thinking I might have been a bit rude, I added, “The tea’s not sweet enough for my taste. Dip your little finger in the cup, Judy. It will make it nectar.”

‘“What’s necthar?” sez she.

“What’s nectar?” she says.

“‘Somethin’ very sweet,” sez I; an’ for the sinful life av me I cud not help lookin’ at her out av the corner av my eye, as I was used to look at a woman.

“‘Something very sweet,’ I said; and for the sinful life of me, I couldn’t help glancing at her out of the corner of my eye, as I was used to looking at a woman.”

‘“Go on wid ye, corp’ril,” sez she. “You’re a flirrt.”

“Go on with you, corporal,” she said. “You’re a flirt.”

‘“On me sowl I’m not,” sez I.

‘“I swear I’m not,” I said.

‘“Then you’re a cruel handsome man, an’ that’s worse,” sez she, heaving big sighs an’ lookin’ crossways.

“Then you’re a cruel, handsome man, and that’s even worse,” she said, letting out big sighs and looking sideways.

‘“You know your own mind,” sez I.

“You know what you want,” I said.

‘“‘Twud be better for me if I did not,” she sez.

“‘It would be better for me if I didn’t,” she says.

‘“There’s a dale to be said on both sides av that,” sez I, unthinkin’.

“There's a lot to be said on both sides of that,” I said thoughtlessly.

‘“Say your own part av ut, then, Terence, darlin’,” sez she; “for begad I’m thinkin’ I’ve said too much or too little for an honest girl,” an’ wid that she put her arms round my neck an’ kissed me.

“Go ahead and say your part then, Terence, darling,” she said; “because honestly, I’m thinking I’ve said too much or not enough for a decent girl,” and with that, she wrapped her arms around my neck and kissed me.

‘“There’s no more to be said afther that,” sez I, kissin’ her back again—Oh the mane scutt that I was, my head ringin’ wid Dinah Shadd! How does ut come about, sorr, that when a man has put the comether on wan woman, he’s sure bound to put it on another? ‘Tis the same thing at musketry. Wan day ivry shot goes wide or into the bank, an’ the next, lay high lay low, sight or snap, ye can’t get off the bull’s-eye for ten shots runnin’.’

“There's nothing more to say after that,” I said, kissing her back again—Oh, how foolish I was, my head spinning with thoughts of Dinah Shadd! How does it happen, sir, that when a man has made a move on one woman, he’s sure to try it on another? It’s just like shooting. One day every shot goes wide or hits the bank, and the next, whether you aim high or low, whether you sight or snap, you can’t hit the bull's-eye for ten shots in a row.”

‘That only happens to a man who has had a good deal of experience. He does it without thinking,’ I replied.

"That only happens to someone who has a lot of experience. They do it without even thinking," I replied.

‘Thankin’ you for the complimint, sorr, ut may be so. But I’m doubtful whether you mint ut for a complimint. Hear now; I sat there wid Judy on my knee tellin’ me all manner av nonsinse an’ only sayin’ “yes” an’ “no,” when I’d much better ha’ kept tongue betune teeth. An’ that was not an hour afther I had left Dinah! What I was thinkin’ av I cannot say. Presintly, quiet as a cat, ould Mother Sheehy came in velvet-dhrunk. She had her daughter’s red hair, but ‘twas bald in patches, an’ I cud see in her wicked ould face, clear as lightnin’, what Judy wud be twenty years to come. I was for jumpin’ up, but Judy niver moved.

"Thanks for the compliment, sir, but I’m not so sure you meant it as a compliment. Listen, I was sitting there with Judy on my lap, who was telling me all sorts of nonsense and only saying “yes” and “no,” when I really should have kept my mouth shut. And that was less than an hour after I had left Dinah! What I was thinking, I can’t say. Suddenly, quiet as a cat, old Mother Sheehy came in, drunk as a skunk. She had her daughter’s red hair, but it was patchy and bald in places, and I could see in her wicked old face, clear as lightning, what Judy would look like twenty years from now. I wanted to jump up, but Judy didn’t move."

‘“Terence has promust, mother,” sez she, an’ the could sweat bruk out all over me. Ould Mother Sheehy sat down of a heap an’ began playin’ wid the cups. “Thin you’re a well-matched pair,” she sez very thick. “For he’s the biggest rogue that iver spoiled the queen’s shoe-leather” an’—

‘“Terence has promised, mother,” she said, and I could feel a sweat break out all over me. Old Mother Sheehy sat down on a heap and started playing with the cups. “Then you’re a well-matched pair,” she said with a sly smile. “For he’s the biggest rogue that ever wore out the queen’s shoe-leather” and—

‘“I’m off, Judy,” sez I. “Ye should not talk nonsinse to your mother. Get her to bed, girl.”

“I'm heading out, Judy,” I said. “You shouldn't talk nonsense to your mother. Get her to bed, girl.”

‘“Nonsinse!” sez the ould woman, prickin’ up her ears like a cat an’ grippin’ the table-edge. “‘Twill be the most nonsinsical nonsinse for you, ye grinnin’ badger, if nonsinse ‘tis. Git clear, you. I’m goin’ to bed.”

‘“Nonsense!” said the old woman, perkily raising her ears like a cat and gripping the edge of the table. “‘It’ll be the most nonsensical nonsense for you, you grinning badger, if it’s nonsense at all. Get out of here. I’m going to bed.”’

‘I ran out into the dhark, my head in a stew an’ my heart sick, but I had sinse enough to see that I’d brought ut all on mysilf. “It’s this to pass the time av day to a panjandhrum av hell-cats,” sez I. “What I’ve said, an’ what I’ve not said do not matther. Judy an’ her dam will hould me for a promust man, an’ Dinah will give me the go, an’ I desarve ut. I will go an’ get dhrunk,” sez I, “an’ forget about ut, for ‘tis plain I’m not a marrin’ man.”

‘I ran out into the dark, my mind racing and my heart heavy, but I was smart enough to realize that I brought this all on myself. “This is just a way to pass the time among a bunch of troublemakers,” I said. “What I’ve said and what I haven’t said don’t matter. Judy and her mother will hold me for a fool, and Dinah will turn me down, and I deserve it. I’m going to get drunk,” I said, “and forget about it, because it’s clear I’m not the marrying type.”

‘On my way to canteen I ran against Lascelles, colour-sergint that was av E Comp’ny, a hard, hard man, wid a torment av a wife. “You’ve the head av a drowned man on your shoulders,” sez he; “an’ you’re goin’ where you’ll get a worse wan. Come back,” sez he. “Let me go,” sez I. “I’ve thrown my luck over the wall wid my own hand!”—“Then that’s not the way to get ut back again,” sez he. “Have out wid your throuble, ye fool-bhoy.” An’ I tould him how the matther was.

‘On my way to the canteen, I ran into Lascelles, the color sergeant from E Company, a tough guy with a really difficult wife. “You look like a drowned man,” he said. “And you’re heading somewhere even worse. Come back,” he told me. “Let me go,” I said. “I’ve thrown my luck over the wall with my own hand!”—“Then that’s not how you get it back,” he replied. “Deal with your troubles, you foolish boy.” And I told him what was going on.

‘He sucked in his lower lip. “You’ve been thrapped,” sez he. “Ju Sheehy wud be the betther for a man’s name to hers as soon as can. An’ we thought ye’d put the comether on her,—that’s the natural vanity of the baste, Terence, you’re a big born fool, but you’re not bad enough to marry into that comp’ny. If you said anythin’, an’ for all your protestations I’m sure ye did—or did not, which is worse,—eat ut all—lie like the father of all lies, but come out av ut free av Judy. Do I not know what ut is to marry a woman that was the very spit an’ image av Judy whin she was young? I’m gettin’ old an’ I’ve larnt patience, but you, Terence, you’d raise hand on Judy an’ kill her in a year. Never mind if Dinah gives you the go, you’ve desarved ut; never mind if the whole reg’mint laughs you all day. Get shut av Judy an’ her mother. They can’t dhrag you to church, but if they do, they’ll dhrag you to hell. Go back to your quarters and lie down,” sez he. Thin over his shoulder, “You MUST ha’ done with thim.”

‘He bit his lower lip. “You’ve been caught,” he said. “Ju Sheehy would be better off with a man’s name as soon as possible. And we thought you’d get her interested—that’s just the natural vanity of it, Terence, you’re a born fool, but you’re not foolish enough to marry into that family. If you said anything—and for all your claims, I’m sure you did—or didn’t, which is worse—just deal with it—lie like there’s no tomorrow, but come out of it clear of Judy. Don’t I know what it’s like to marry a woman who was the exact image of Judy when she was young? I’m getting old and I’ve learned patience, but you, Terence, you’d lay hands on Judy and hurt her in a year. Forget if Dinah gives you the okay; you’ve earned it; forget if the whole regiment laughs at you all day. Get away from Judy and her mother. They can’t drag you to church, but if they do, they’ll drag you to hell. Go back to your quarters and lie down,” he said. Then over his shoulder, “You MUST be done with them.”

‘Next day I wint to see Dinah, but there was no tucker in me as I walked. I knew the throuble wud come soon enough widout any handlin’ av mine, an’ I dreaded ut sore.

‘The next day I went to see Dinah, but I had no appetite as I walked. I knew the trouble would come soon enough without any help from me, and I dreaded it deeply.

‘I heard Judy callin’ me, but I hild straight on to the Shadds’ quarthers, an’ Dinah wud ha’ kissed me but I put her back.

‘I heard Judy calling me, but I held straight on to the Shadds’ quarters, and Dinah would have kissed me but I pushed her away.

‘“Whin all’s said, darlin’,” sez I, “you can give ut me if ye will, tho’ I misdoubt ‘twill be so easy to come by then.”

‘“When all’s said and done, darling,” I said, “you can give it to me if you want, though I doubt it’ll be so easy to get then.”

‘I had scarce begun to put the explanation into shape before Judy an’ her mother came to the door. I think there was a verandah, but I’m forgettin’.

‘I had just started to organize the explanation before Judy and her mother came to the door. I think there was a porch, but I can’t remember.’

‘“Will ye not step in?” sez Dinah, pretty and polite, though the Shadds had no dealin’s with the Sheehys. Ould Mother Shadd looked up quick, an’ she was the fust to see the throuble; for Dinah was her daughter.

“Won't you come in?” said Dinah, charming and courteous, even though the Shadds had no dealings with the Sheehys. Old Mother Shadd looked up quickly, and she was the first to notice the trouble; because Dinah was her daughter.

‘“I’m pressed for time to-day,” sez Judy as bould as brass; “an’ I’ve only come for Terence,—my promust man. ‘Tis strange to find him here the day afther the day.”

‘“I’m short on time today,” says Judy boldly; “and I’ve only come for Terence—my promised man. It’s strange to find him here the day after the day.”

‘Dinah looked at me as though I had hit her, an’ I answered straight.

‘Dinah looked at me like I had just slapped her, and I responded honestly.

‘“There was some nonsinse last night at the Sheehys’ quarthers, an’ Judy’s carryin’ on the joke, darlin’,” sez I.

“Last night there was some nonsense at the Sheehys’ place, and Judy’s still joking about it, darling,” I said.

‘“At the Sheehys’ quarthers?” sez Dinah very slow, an’ Judy cut in wid: “He was there from nine till ten, Dinah Shadd, an’ the betther half av that time I was sittin’ on his knee, Dinah Shadd. Ye may look and ye may look an’ ye may look me up an’ down, but ye won’t look away that Terence is my promust man. Terence, darlin’, ‘tis time for us to be comin’ home.”

“‘At the Sheehys’ place?’ Dinah said slowly, and Judy jumped in with: “He was there from nine to ten, Dinah Shadd, and for most of that time I was sitting on his lap, Dinah Shadd. You can look and look and look me up and down, but you won’t find that Terence isn’t my fiancé. Terence, darling, it’s time for us to head home.”

‘Dinah Shadd niver said word to Judy. “Ye left me at half-past eight,” she sez to me, “an I niver thought that ye’d leave me for Judy,—promises or no promises. Go back wid her, you that have to be fetched by a girl! I’m done with you,” sez she, and she ran into her own room, her mother followin’. So I was alone wid those two women and at liberty to spake my sentiments.

‘Dinah Shadd never said a word to Judy. “You left me at eight-thirty,” she said to me, “and I never thought you’d choose Judy over me—promises or not. Go back with her, you who need to be rescued by a girl! I’m through with you,” she said, and ran into her own room, her mother following. So I was alone with those two women and free to speak my mind.

‘“Judy Sheehy,” sez I, “if you made a fool av me betune the lights you shall not do ut in the day. I niver promised you words or lines.”

“Judy Sheehy,” I said, “if you made a fool of me between the lights, you will not do it in the daytime. I never promised you words or lines.”

‘“You lie,” sez ould Mother Sheehy, “an’ may ut choke you where you stand!” She was far gone in dhrink.

‘“You’re lying,” said old Mother Sheehy, “and may it choke you where you stand!” She was very drunk.

‘“An’ tho’ ut choked me where I stud I’d not change,” sez I. “Go home, Judy. I take shame for a decent girl like you dhraggin’ your mother out bare-headed on this errand. Hear now, and have ut for an answer. I gave my word to Dinah Shadd yesterday, an’, more blame to me, I was wid you last night talkin’ nonsinse but nothin’ more. You’ve chosen to thry to hould me on ut. I will not be held thereby for anythin’ in the world. Is that enough?”

“Even if it suffocated me where I stand, I wouldn’t change,” I said. “Go home, Judy. I’m ashamed to see a decent girl like you dragging your mother out without a hat on this errand. Listen, and take this as my answer. I promised Dinah Shadd yesterday, and I regret to say I was with you last night talking nonsense but nothing more. You’ve chosen to try to hold me to it. I will not be held to it for anything in the world. Is that clear enough?”

‘Judy wint pink all over. “An’ I wish you joy av the perjury,” sez she, duckin’ a curtsey. “You’ve lost a woman that would ha’ wore her hand to the bone for your pleasure; an’ ‘deed, Terence, ye were not thrapped...” Lascelles must ha’ spoken plain to her. “I am such as Dinah is—‘deed I am! Ye’ve lost a fool av a girl that’ll niver look at you again, an’ ye’ve lost what he niver had,—your common honesty. If you manage your men as you manage your love-makin’, small wondher they call you the worst corp’ril in the comp’ny. Come away, mother,” sez she.

‘Judy turned bright pink all over. “And I wish you joy of the lying,” she said, dipping into a curtsy. “You’ve lost a woman who would’ve worked herself to the bone for your happiness; and indeed, Terence, you weren’t exactly caught…” Lascelles must have been very clear with her. “I’m just like Dinah—indeed I am! You’ve lost a foolish girl who’ll never look at you again, and you’ve lost what he never had—your basic honesty. If you manage your men the way you handle your love life, it’s no wonder they call you the worst corporal in the company. Come on, mother,” she said.

‘But divil a fut would the ould woman budge! “D’you hould by that?” sez she, peerin’ up under her thick gray eyebrows.

‘But not a step would the old woman move! “Do you believe that?” she said, peering up under her thick gray eyebrows.

‘“Ay, an’ wud,” sez I, “tho’ Dinah give me the go twinty times. I’ll have no thruck with you or yours,” sez I. “Take your child away, ye shameless woman.”

‘“Yeah, I would,” I said, “even though Dinah told me twenty times. I won’t have any dealings with you or your family,” I said. “Take your child away, you shameless woman.”

“‘An’ am I shameless?” sez she, bringin’ her hands up above her head. “Thin what are you, ye lyin’, schamin’, weak-kneed, dhirty-souled son av a sutler? Am I shameless? Who put the open shame on me an’ my child that we shud go beggin’ through the lines in the broad daylight for the broken word of a man? Double portion of my shame be on you, Terence Mulvaney, that think yourself so strong! By Mary and the saints, by blood and water an’ by ivry sorrow that came into the world since the beginnin’, the black blight fall on you and yours, so that you may niver be free from pain for another when ut’s not your own! May your heart bleed in your breast drop by drop wid all your friends laughin’ at the bleedin’! Strong you think yourself? May your strength be a curse to you to dhrive you into the divil’s hands against your own will! Clear-eyed you are? May your eyes see clear ivry step av the dark path you take till the hot cindhers av hell put thim out! May the ragin’ dry thirst in my own ould bones go to you that you shall niver pass bottle full nor glass empty. God preserve the light av your onderstandin’ to you, my jewel av a bhoy, that ye may niver forget what you mint to be an’ do, whin you’re wallowin’ in the muck! May ye see the betther and follow the worse as long as there’s breath in your body; an’ may ye die quick in a strange land, watchin’ your death before ut takes you, an’ enable to stir hand or foot!”

“Am I shameless?” she said, raising her hands above her head. “Then what are you, you lying, scheming, weak-kneed, dirty-souled son of a sutler? Am I shameless? Who has brought this open shame on me and my child, making us beg through the lines in broad daylight for the broken promise of a man? A double portion of my shame be on you, Terence Mulvaney, who think yourself so strong! By Mary and the saints, by blood and water, and by every sorrow that has come into the world since the beginning, may the black curse fall on you and yours, so that you may never be free from pain for anyone but yourself! May your heart bleed in your chest drop by drop with all your friends laughing at your suffering! You think you're strong? May your strength be a curse that drives you into the devil’s hands against your will! You think you see clearly? May your eyes see every step of the dark path you take until the hot embers of hell put them out! May the raging dry thirst in my old bones go to you so that you will never have a full bottle or an empty glass. God preserve the light of your understanding, my jewel of a boy, so that you may never forget what you meant to be and do when you’re wallowing in the muck! May you see the better and follow the worse as long as there’s breath in your body; and may you die quickly in a strange land, watching your death approach without being able to move a hand or foot!”

‘I heard a scufflin’ in the room behind, and thin Dinah Shadd’s hand dhropped into mine like a rose-leaf into a muddy road.

‘I heard some scuffling in the room behind, and thin Dinah Shadd’s hand dropped into mine like a rose petal falling onto a muddy road.

‘“The half av that I’ll take,” sez she, “an’ more too if I can. Go home, ye silly talkin’ woman,—go home an’ confess.”

‘“I’ll take half of that,” she says, “and more if I can. Go home, you silly woman—go home and admit it.”

‘“Come away! Come away!” sez Judy, pullin’ her mother by the shawl. “‘Twas none av Terence’s fault. For the love av Mary stop the talkin’!”

“Come on! Come on!” says Judy, pulling her mother by the shawl. “It wasn’t Terence’s fault. For the love of Mary, stop talking!”

“‘An’ you!” said ould Mother Sheehy, spinnin’ round forninst Dinah. “Will ye take the half av that man’s load? Stand off from him, Dinah Shadd, before he takes you down too—you that look to be a quarther-master-sergeant’s wife in five years. You look too high, child. You shall WASH for the quarther-master-sergeant, whin he plases to give you the job out av charity; but a privit’s wife you shall be to the end, an’ ivry sorrow of a privit’s wife you shall know and niver a joy but wan, that shall go from you like the running tide from a rock. The pain av bearin’ you shall know but niver the pleasure av giving the breast; an’ you shall put away a man-child into the common ground wid niver a priest to say a prayer over him, an’ on that man-child ye shall think ivry day av your life. Think long, Dinah Shadd, for you’ll niver have another tho’ you pray till your knees are bleedin’. The mothers av childher shall mock you behind your back when you’re wringing over the wash-tub. You shall know what ut is to help a dhrunken husband home an’ see him go to the gyard-room. Will that plase you, Dinah Shadd, that won’t be seen talkin’ to my daughter? You shall talk to worse than Judy before all’s over. The sergints’ wives shall look down on you contemptuous, daughter av a sergint, an’ you shall cover ut all up wid a smiling face when your heart’s burstin’. Stand off av him, Dinah Shadd, for I’ve put the Black Curse of Shielygh upon him an’ his own mouth shall make ut good.”

“‘And you!’ said old Mother Sheehy, spinning around towards Dinah. ‘Will you take half of that man’s load? Step away from him, Dinah Shadd, before he brings you down too—you who look like you could be a quarter-master-sergeant’s wife in five years. You’re aiming too high, child. You’ll WASH for the quarter-master-sergeant when he decides to give you the job as a favor; but you’ll be a private’s wife until the end, and every sorrow of a private’s wife you’ll feel, with only one joy that will leave you like the tide rushing away from a rock. You’ll know the pain of bearing a child but never the pleasure of breastfeeding; and you’ll bury a baby boy in the common ground without a priest to say a prayer over him, and that baby boy you’ll think about every day of your life. Think long, Dinah Shadd, because you'll never have another even if you pray until your knees are bleeding. The mothers of children will laugh at you behind your back while you’re toiling at the wash tub. You’ll understand what it’s like to bring a drunken husband home and see him go to the guardroom. Will that please you, Dinah Shadd, who won’t be seen talking to my daughter? You’ll talk to worse than Judy before it’s all over. The sergeants’ wives will look down on you with contempt, daughter of a sergeant, and you’ll keep it all hidden behind a smiling face while your heart is breaking. Step away from him, Dinah Shadd, for I’ve put the Black Curse of Shielygh on him, and his own mouth will make it right.’”

‘She pitched forward on her head an’ began foamin’ at the mouth. Dinah Shadd ran out wid water, an’ Judy dhragged the ould woman into the verandah till she sat up.

‘She fell forward on her head and started foaming at the mouth. Dinah Shadd ran out with water, and Judy dragged the old woman into the veranda until she sat up.

‘“I’m old an’ forlore,” she sez, thremblin’ an’ cryin’, “and ‘tis like I say a dale more than I mane.”

“I'm old and lost,” she says, trembling and crying, “and it's like I say a lot more than I mean.”

‘“When you’re able to walk,—go,” says ould Mother Shadd. “This house has no place for the likes av you that have cursed my daughter.”

“‘When you’re able to walk,—go,’ says old Mother Shadd. ‘This house has no place for people like you who have cursed my daughter.’”

‘“Eyah!” said the ould woman. “Hard words break no bones, an’ Dinah Shadd’ll kape the love av her husband till my bones are green corn. Judy darlin’, I misremember what I came here for. Can you lend us the bottom av a taycup av tay, Mrs. Shadd?”

‘“Eyah!” said the old woman. “Harsh words don’t hurt, and Dinah Shadd will keep her husband's love until I'm buried. Judy darling, I forgot why I came here. Can you lend us the bottom of a teacup of tea, Mrs. Shadd?”

‘But Judy dhragged her off cryin’ as tho’ her heart wud break. An’ Dinah Shadd an’ I, in ten minutes we had forgot ut all.’

‘But Judy dragged her off crying as though her heart would break. And Dinah Shadd and I, in ten minutes we had forgotten it all.’

‘Then why do you remember it now?’ said I.

"Then why are you remembering it now?" I said.

‘Is ut like I’d forget? Ivry word that wicked ould woman spoke fell thrue in my life aftherwards, an’ I cud ha’ stud ut all—stud ut all—excipt when my little Shadd was born. That was on the line av march three months afther the regiment was taken with cholera. We were betune Umballa an’ Kalka thin, an’ I was on picket. Whin I came off duty the women showed me the child, an’ ut turned on uts side an’ died as I looked. We buried him by the road, an’ Father Victor was a day’s march behind wid the heavy baggage, so the comp’ny captain read a prayer. An’ since then I’ve been a childless man, an’ all else that ould Mother Sheehy put upon me an’ Dinah Shadd. What do you think, sorr?’

‘Do you think I’d forget? Every word that wicked old woman said came true in my life afterward, and I could have stood it all—stood it all—except when my little Shadd was born. That was in March, three months after the regiment got hit by cholera. We were between Umballa and Kalka then, and I was on picket duty. When I came off duty, the women showed me the child, and it turned on its side and died as I looked. We buried him by the road, and Father Victor was a day’s march behind with the heavy baggage, so the company captain read a prayer. And since then I’ve been a childless man, and everything else that old Mother Sheehy put on me and Dinah Shadd. What do you think, sir?’

I thought a good deal, but it seemed better then to reach out for Mulvaney’s hand. The demonstration nearly cost me the use of three fingers. Whatever he knows of his weaknesses, Mulvaney is entirely ignorant of his strength.

I thought a lot about it, but it felt better to grab Mulvaney’s hand. The effort almost cost me the use of three fingers. Whatever he knows about his weaknesses, Mulvaney is completely unaware of his strength.

‘But what do you think?’ he repeated, as I was straightening out the crushed fingers.

‘But what do you think?’ he asked again while I was fixing the crushed fingers.

My reply was drowned in yells and outcries from the next fire, where ten men were shouting for ‘Orth’ris,’ ‘Privit Orth’ris,’ ‘Mistah Or—ther—ris!’ ‘Deah boy,’ ‘Cap’n Orth’ris,’ ‘Field-Marshal Orth’ris,’ ‘Stanley, you pen’north o’ pop, come ‘ere to your own comp’ny!’ And the cockney, who had been delighting another audience with recondite and Rabelaisian yarns, was shot down among his admirers by the major force.

My response got lost in the shouting and chaos from the next fire, where ten guys were calling out for ‘Orth’ris,’ ‘Private Orth’ris,’ ‘Mister Or—ther—ris!’ ‘Dear boy,’ ‘Captain Orth’ris,’ ‘Field Marshal Orth’ris,’ ‘Stanley, you penny north of pop, get over here to your own company!’ And the cockney, who had been entertaining another crowd with obscure and bawdy stories, was taken down among his fans by the main force.

‘You’ve crumpled my dress-shirt ‘orrid,’ said he, ‘an’ I shan’t sing no more to this ‘ere bloomin’ drawin’-room.’

‘You’ve wrinkled my dress shirt terribly,’ he said, ‘and I won’t sing anymore in this blooming drawing room.’

Learoyd, roused by the confusion, uncoiled himself, crept behind Ortheris, and slung him aloft on his shoulders.

Learoyd, awakened by the chaos, stretched out, crawled behind Ortheris, and lifted him onto his shoulders.

‘Sing, ye bloomin’ hummin’ bird!’ said he, and Ortheris, beating time on Learoyd’s skull, delivered himself, in the raucous voice of the Ratcliffe Highway, of this song:—

‘Sing, you blooming hummingbird!’ he said, and Ortheris, keeping the beat on Learoyd’s head, sang out, in the harsh voice of the Ratcliffe Highway, this song:—

    My girl she give me the go onst,
      When I was a London lad,
    An’ I went on the drink for a fortnight,
      An’ then I went to the bad.
    The Queen she give me a shillin’ 
      To fight for ‘er over the seas;
    But Guv’ment built me a fever-trap,
      An’ Injia give me disease.
    My girl gave me the green light once,  
      When I was a young man in London,  
    And I went on a drinking spree for two weeks,  
      And then I went downhill.  
    The Queen gave me a shilling  
      To fight for her across the ocean;  
    But the Government set up a fever trap for me,  
      And India gave me an illness.  

Chorus.

Chorus.

    Ho! don’t you ‘eed what a girl says,
      An’ don’t you go for the beer;
    But I was an ass when I was at grass,
      An’ that is why I’m ‘ere.

   I fired a shot at a Afghan,
      The beggar ‘e fired again,
    An’ I lay on my bed with a ‘ole in my ‘ed;
      An’ missed the next campaign!
    I up with my gun at a Burman
      Who carried a bloomin’ dah,
    But the cartridge stuck and the bay’nit bruk,
      An’ all I got was the scar.
    Hey! don’t you need to hear what a girl says,
      And don’t go for the beer;
    But I was a fool when I was young,
      And that’s why I’m here.

   I took a shot at an Afghan,
      The guy shot back,
    And I lay on my bed with a hole in my head;
      And missed the next campaign!
    I aimed my gun at a Burman
      Who was carrying a bloody dagger,
    But the cartridge jammed and the bayonet broke,
      And all I got was the scar.

Chorus.

Chorus.

    Ho! don’t you aim at a Afghan
       When you stand on the sky-line clear;
    An’ don’t you go for a Burman
      If none o’ your friends is near.

    I served my time for a corp’ral,
      An’ wetted my stripes with pop,
    For I went on the bend with a intimate friend,
      An’ finished the night in the ‘shop.’ 
    I served my time for a sergeant;
      The colonel ‘e sez ‘No!
    The most you’ll see is a full C. B.’ 
    Hey! don’t you go for an Afghan  
       When you’re standing on the skyline clear;  
    And don’t you go for a Burman  
      If none of your friends is near.  

    I did my time for a corporal,  
      And soaked my stripes with booze,  
    Because I went out with a close friend,  
      And ended the night at the ‘shop.’  
    I did my time for a sergeant;  
      The colonel says, ‘No!  
    The most you’ll get is a full C. B.’  
[Footnote: Confined to barracks.]
      An’...very next night ‘twas so.
[Footnote: Confined to barracks.]
      And...the very next night it was like that.

Chorus.

Chorus.

    Ho! don’t you go for a corp’ral
      Unless your ‘ed is clear;
    But I was an ass when I was at grass,
      An’ that is why I’m ‘ere.

    I’ve tasted the luck o’ the army
      In barrack an’ camp an’ clink,
    An’ I lost my tip through the bloomin’ trip
      Along o’ the women an’ drink.
    I’m down at the heel o’ my service
      An’ when I am laid on the shelf,
    My very wust friend from beginning to end
      By the blood of a mouse was myself!
    Hey! Don’t you join the army
      Unless your head is clear;
    But I was a fool when I was young,
      And that’s why I’m here.

    I’ve experienced the luck of the military
      In barracks and camp and clink,
    And I lost my position due to a stupid mistake
      Because of women and drink.
    I’m down on my luck with my service
      And when I’m put out to pasture,
    My very worst enemy from start to finish
      By the blood of a mouse was myself!

Chorus.

Chorus.

    Ho! don’t you ‘eed what a girl says,
      An’ don’t you go for the beer;
    But I was an ass when I was at grass,
      An’ that is why I’m ‘ere.
    Hey! don’t you need what a girl says,
      And don’t you go for the beer;
    But I was a fool when I was young,
      And that is why I’m here.

‘Ay, listen to our little man now, singin’ an’ shoutin’ as tho’ trouble had niver touched him. D’you remember when he went mad with the home-sickness?’ said Mulvaney, recalling a never-to-be-forgotten season when Ortheris waded through the deep waters of affliction and behaved abominably. ‘But he’s talkin’ bitter truth, though. Eyah!

‘Yeah, listen to our little guy now, singing and shouting like trouble has never touched him. Do you remember when he went crazy with homesickness?’ said Mulvaney, recalling an unforgettable time when Ortheris struggled through a lot of pain and acted terribly. ‘But he’s speaking some harsh truths, though. Wow!

   ‘My very worst frind from beginnin’ to ind
    By the blood av a mouse was mesilf!’ 
‘My very worst friend from beginning to end By the blood of a mouse was me!’

When I woke I saw Mulvaney, the night-dew gemming his moustache, leaning on his rifle at picket, lonely as Prometheus on his rock, with I know not what vultures tearing his liver.

When I woke up, I saw Mulvaney, the night dew sparkling on his mustache, leaning on his rifle at the picket, as lonely as Prometheus on his rock, with I don’t know what vultures ripping his liver apart.





ON GREENHOW HILL

 To Love’s low voice she lent a careless ear;
 Her hand within his rosy fingers lay,
 A chilling weight. She would not turn or hear;
 But with averted face went on her way.
 But when pale Death, all featureless and grim,
 Lifted his bony hand, and beckoning
 Held out his cypress-wreath, she followed him,
 And Love was left forlorn and wondering,
 That she who for his bidding would not stay,
 At Death’s first whisper rose and went away.
                                 RIVALS.
To Love’s soft voice, she paid no attention;  
Her hand rested in his gentle grip,  
A heavy burden. She wouldn’t turn or listen;  
With her face turned away, she moved along.  
But when pale Death, all without shape and grim,  
Lifted his bony hand and signaled,  
Holding out his cypress wreath, she followed him,  
And Love was left alone and confused,  
Wondering why she wouldn’t stay for him,  
But at Death’s first call, she got up and went away.  
                                 RIVALS.

‘Ohe, Ahmed Din! Shafiz Ullah ahoo! Bahadur Khan, where are you? Come out of the tents, as I have done, and fight against the English. Don’t kill your own kin! Come out to me!’

‘Ohe, Ahmed Din! Shafiz Ullah, come here! Bahadur Khan, where are you? Come out of the tents like I have and fight against the English. Don’t harm your own people! Come to me!’

The deserter from a native corps was crawling round the outskirts of the camp, firing at intervals, and shouting invitations to his old comrades. Misled by the rain and the darkness, he came to the English wing of the camp, and with his yelping and rifle-practice disturbed the men. They had been making roads all day, and were tired.

The deserter from a local battalion was crawling around the edges of the camp, firing his gun sporadically and calling out to his old buddies. Mistakenly guided by the rain and darkness, he reached the English side of the camp, and his shouting and rifle shots disrupted the soldiers. They had been working on the roads all day and were exhausted.

Ortheris was sleeping at Learoyd’s feet. ‘Wot’s all that?’ he said thickly. Learoyd snored, and a Snider bullet ripped its way through the tent wall. The men swore. ‘It’s that bloomin’ deserter from the Aurangabadis,’ said Ortheris. ‘Git up, some one, an’ tell ‘im ‘e’s come to the wrong shop.’

Ortheris was sleeping at Learoyd’s feet. “What’s all that?” he said groggily. Learoyd snored, and a Snider bullet tore through the tent wall. The men cursed. “It’s that damn deserter from the Aurangabadis,” Ortheris said. “Someone get up and tell him he’s got the wrong place.”

‘Go to sleep, little man,’ said Mulvaney, who was steaming nearest the door. ‘I can’t arise an’ expaytiate with him. ‘Tis rainin’ entrenchin’ tools outside.’

‘Go to sleep, little man,’ said Mulvaney, who was standing closest to the door. ‘I can’t get up and discuss things with him. It’s raining heavy outside.’

‘’Tain’t because you bloomin’ can’t. It’s ‘cause you bloomin’ won’t, ye long, limp, lousy, lazy beggar, you. ‘Ark to’im ‘owlin’!’

‘’It’s not because you can't. It’s because you won’t, you long, limp, lousy, lazy beggar, you. Listen to him howling!’’’

‘Wot’s the good of argifying? Put a bullet into the swine! ‘E’s keepin’ us awake!’ said another voice.

‘What's the point of arguing? Just shoot the pig! He's keeping us awake!’ said another voice.

A subaltern shouted angrily, and a dripping sentry whined from the darkness—

A subaltern yelled angrily, and a soaked sentry complained from the darkness—

‘’Tain’t no good, sir. I can’t see ‘im. ‘E’s ‘idin’ somewhere down ‘ill.’

‘It’s no good, sir. I can’t see him. He’s hiding somewhere down the hill.’

Ortheris tumbled out of his blanket. ‘Shall I try to get ‘im, sir?’ said he.

Ortheris rolled out of his blanket. "Should I go after him, sir?" he asked.

‘No,’ was the answer. ‘Lie down. I won’t have the whole camp shooting all round the clock. Tell him to go and pot his friends.’

‘No,’ was the answer. ‘Lie down. I won’t let the whole camp shoot non-stop. Tell him to go and take down his buddies.’

Ortheris considered for a moment. Then, putting his head under the tent wall, he called, as a ‘bus conductor calls in a block, ‘’Igher up, there! ‘Igher up!’

Ortheris thought for a moment. Then, leaning under the tent wall, he shouted, like a bus conductor calling out in a busy area, "Higher up, there! Higher up!"

The men laughed, and the laughter was carried down wind to the deserter, who, hearing that he had made a mistake, went off to worry his own regiment half a mile away. He was received with shots; the Aurangabadis were very angry with him for disgracing their colours.

The men laughed, and their laughter was carried by the wind to the deserter, who, realizing he had messed up, decided to go bother his own regiment half a mile away. He was met with gunfire; the Aurangabadis were really upset with him for tarnishing their colors.

‘An’ that’s all right,’ said Ortheris, withdrawing his head as he heard the hiccough of the Sniders in the distance. ‘S’elp me Gawd, tho’, that man’s not fit to live—messin’ with my beauty-sleep this way.’

‘And that’s fine,’ said Ortheris, pulling his head back when he heard the Sniders' hiccuping in the distance. ‘I swear, though, that man’s not fit to live—interrupting my beauty sleep like this.’

‘Go out and shoot him in the morning, then,’ said the subaltern incautiously. ‘Silence in the tents now. Get your rest, men.’

‘Go out and shoot him in the morning, then,’ said the subaltern carelessly. ‘Quiet in the tents now. Get some rest, men.’

Ortheris lay down with a happy little sigh, and in two minutes there was no sound except the rain on the canvas and the all-embracing and elemental snoring of Learoyd.

Ortheris settled down with a contented sigh, and in two minutes, there was no sound except for the rain on the canvas and the deep, all-encompassing snoring of Learoyd.

The camp lay on a bare ridge of the Himalayas, and for a week had been waiting for a flying column to make connection. The nightly rounds of the deserter and his friends had become a nuisance.

The camp was situated on a bare ridge of the Himalayas, and for a week, they had been waiting for a flying column to make contact. The nightly patrols by the deserter and his friends had become a hassle.

In the morning the men dried themselves in hot sunshine and cleaned their grimy accoutrements. The native regiment was to take its turn of road-making that day while the Old Regiment loafed.

In the morning, the men dried off in the hot sun and cleaned their dirty gear. The local regiment was set to take its turn at road-making that day while the Old Regiment relaxed.

‘I’m goin’ to lay for a shot at that man,’ said Ortheris, when he had finished washing out his rifle. ‘’E comes up the watercourse every evenin’ about five o’clock. If we go and lie out on the north ‘ill a bit this afternoon we’ll get ‘im.’

‘I’m going to wait for a chance to take a shot at that guy,’ said Ortheris, after he finished cleaning his rifle. ‘He comes up the stream every evening around five o’clock. If we go and lie out on the north hill for a while this afternoon, we’ll get him.’

‘You’re a bloodthirsty little mosquito,’ said Mulvaney, blowing blue clouds into the air. ‘But I suppose I will have to come wid you. Fwhere’s Jock?’

‘You’re a bloodthirsty little mosquito,’ Mulvaney said, blowing blue clouds into the air. ‘But I guess I’ll have to go with you. Where’s Jock?’

‘Gone out with the Mixed Pickles, ‘cause ‘e thinks ‘isself a bloomin’ marksman,’ said Ortheris with scorn.

‘Gone out with the Mixed Pickles, ‘cause he thinks he’s a blooming marksman,’ said Ortheris with scorn.

The ‘Mixed Pickles’ were a detachment of picked shots, generally employed in clearing spurs of hills when the enemy were too impertinent. This taught the young officers how to handle men, and did not do the enemy much harm. Mulvaney and Ortheris strolled out of camp, and passed the Aurangabadis going to their road-making.

The 'Mixed Pickles' were a group of selected troops, usually used to clear out hilltops when the enemy was being particularly troublesome. This helped the young officers learn how to manage their men and didn't really hurt the enemy much. Mulvaney and Ortheris walked out of camp and passed the Aurangabadis who were heading to their road work.

‘You’ve got to sweat to-day,’ said Ortheris genially. ‘We’re going to get your man. You didn’t knock ‘im out last night by any chance, any of you?’

‘You’ve got to work hard today,’ said Ortheris cheerfully. ‘We’re going to catch your guy. You didn’t knock him out last night by any chance, did you?’

‘No. The pig went away mocking us. I had one shot at him,’ said a private. ‘He’s my cousin, and I ought to have cleared our dishonour. But good luck to you.’

‘No. The pig walked away laughing at us. I only had one chance to take him out,’ said a private. ‘He’s my cousin, and I should have redeemed our honor. But good luck to you.’

They went cautiously to the north hill, Ortheris leading, because, as he explained, ’this is a long-range show, an’ I’ve got to do it.’ His was an almost passionate devotion to his rifle, which, by barrack-room report, he was supposed to kiss every night before turning in. Charges and scuffles he held in contempt, and, when they were inevitable, slipped between Mulvaney and Learoyd, bidding them to fight for his skin as well as their own. They never failed him. He trotted along, questing like a hound on a broken trail, through the wood of the north hill. At last he was satisfied, and threw himself down on the soft pine-needled slope that commanded a clear view of the watercourse and a brown, bare hillside beyond it. The trees made a scented darkness in which an army corps could have hidden from the sun-glare without.

They moved carefully to the north hill, with Ortheris in the lead because, as he explained, “this is a long-range mission, and I have to handle it.” He had a nearly passionate devotion to his rifle, which, according to barrack gossip, he was said to kiss every night before going to bed. He looked down on brawls and fights, and when they were unavoidable, he would slip between Mulvaney and Learoyd, telling them to fight for him as well as for themselves. They never let him down. He trotted along, searching like a hound on a faint scent, through the woods of the north hill. Eventually, he was satisfied and lay down on the soft, pine-needled slope that offered a clear view of the watercourse and a brown, bare hillside beyond it. The trees created a fragrant darkness where an entire army corps could have hidden from the glaring sunlight outside.

‘’Ere’s the tail o’ the wood,’ said Ortheris. ‘’E’s got to come up the watercourse, ‘cause it gives ‘im cover. We’ll lay ‘ere. ‘Tain’t not arf so bloomin’ dusty neither.’

“Here’s the end of the woods,” said Ortheris. “He’s got to come up the creek because it gives him cover. We’ll lie here. It’s not nearly as dusty either.”

He buried his nose in a clump of scentless white violets. No one had come to tell the flowers that the season of their strength was long past, and they had bloomed merrily in the twilight of the pines.

He buried his nose in a bunch of scentless white violets. No one had told the flowers that their peak season was long gone, and they had bloomed happily in the fading light of the pines.

‘This is something like,’ he said luxuriously. ‘Wot a ‘evinly clear drop for a bullet acrost! How much d’you make it, Mulvaney?’

‘This is something like,’ he said indulgently. ‘What a heavenly clear shot for a bullet across! How much do you reckon it, Mulvaney?’

‘Seven hunder. Maybe a trifle less, bekaze the air’s so thin.’

‘Seven hundred. Maybe a little less, because the air is so thin.’

WOP! WOP! WOP! went a volley of musketry on the rear face of the north hill.

WOP! WOP! WOP! sounded a barrage of gunfire on the back side of the north hill.

‘Curse them Mixed Pickles firin’ at nothin’! They’ll scare arf the country.’

‘Curse those Mixed Pickles firing at nothing! They're going to scare half the country.’

‘Thry a sightin’ shot in the middle of the row,’ said Mulvaney, the man of many wiles. ‘There’s a red rock yonder he’ll be sure to pass. Quick!’

‘There’s a good chance he’ll walk right in the middle of the row,’ said Mulvaney, the clever one. ‘There’s a red rock over there he’s bound to see. Hurry!’

Ortheris ran his sight up to six hundred yards and fired. The bullet threw up a feather of dust by a clump of gentians at the base of the rock.

Ortheris looked out to six hundred yards and fired. The bullet kicked up a cloud of dust next to a patch of gentians at the bottom of the rock.

‘Good enough!’ said Ortheris, snapping the scale down. ‘You snick your sights to mine or a little lower. You’re always firin’ high. But remember, first shot to me. O Lordy! but it’s a lovely afternoon.’

‘Good enough!’ said Ortheris, slamming the scale down. ‘Just adjust your sights to match mine or a bit lower. You always shoot high. But remember, I get the first shot. Oh man! What a beautiful afternoon.’

The noise of the firing grew louder, and there was a tramping of men in the wood. The two lay very quiet, for they knew that the British soldier is desperately prone to fire at anything that moves or calls. Then Learoyd appeared, his tunic ripped across the breast by a bullet, looking ashamed of himself. He flung down on the pine-needles, breathing in snorts.

The sound of gunfire got louder, and there were footsteps of soldiers in the woods. The two remained very still, knowing that a British soldier is quick to shoot at anything that moves or makes a noise. Then Learoyd showed up, his uniform torn across the chest by a bullet, looking embarrassed. He dropped down onto the pine needles, breathing heavily.

‘One o’ them damned gardeners o’ th’ Pickles,’ said he, fingering the rent. ‘Firin’ to th’ right flank, when he knowed I was there. If I knew who he was I’d ‘a’ rippen the hide offan him. Look at ma tunic!’

‘One of those damn gardeners of the Pickles,’ he said, touching the tear. ‘Firing at my right side, when he knew I was there. If I knew who he was, I would have ripped the skin off him. Look at my tunic!’

‘That’s the spishil trustability av a marksman. Train him to hit a fly wid a stiddy rest at seven hunder, an’ he loose on anythin’ he sees or hears up to th’ mile. You’re well out av that fancy-firin’ gang, Jock. Stay here.’

‘That’s the special reliability of a marksman. Train him to hit a fly with a steady rest at seven hundred, and he’ll take anything he sees or hears up to a mile. You’re fortunate to be out of that flashy shooting crew, Jock. Stay here.’

‘Bin firin’ at the bloomin’ wind in the bloomin’ tree-tops,’ said Ortheris with a chuckle. ‘I’ll show you some firin’ later on.’

‘I'm shooting at the damn wind in the damn treetops,’ said Ortheris with a chuckle. ‘I'll show you some shooting later on.’

They wallowed in the pine-needles, and the sun warmed them where they lay. The Mixed Pickles ceased firing, and returned to camp, and left the wood to a few scared apes. The watercourse lifted up its voice in the silence, and talked foolishly to the rocks. Now and again the dull thump of a blasting charge three miles away told that the Aurangabadis were in difficulties with their road-making. The men smiled as they listened and lay still, soaking in the warm leisure. Presently Learoyd, between the whiffs of his pipe—

They lounged in the pine needles, and the sun warmed them where they lay. The Mixed Pickles stopped firing and went back to camp, leaving the woods to a few frightened monkeys. The waterway raised its voice in the quiet, chatting aimlessly with the rocks. Every now and then, the dull thud of a blasting charge three miles away signaled that the Aurangabadis were having trouble with their road construction. The men smiled as they listened and relaxed, soaking in the warm leisure. Soon, Learoyd, between puffs of his pipe—

‘Seems queer—about ‘im yonder—desertin’ at all.’

‘Seems strange—about him over there—deserting at all.’

‘’E’ll be a bloomin’ side queerer when I’ve done with ‘im,’ said Ortheris. They were talking in whispers, for the stillness of the wood and the desire of slaughter lay heavy upon them.

‘’He’ll be a blooming side queer when I’m done with him,’ said Ortheris. They were talking in whispers, for the stillness of the wood and the desire for slaughter lay heavy upon them.

‘I make no doubt he had his reasons for desertin’; but, my faith! I make less doubt ivry man has good reason for killin’ him,’ said Mulvaney.

‘I don't doubt he had his reasons for leaving; but, honestly! I doubt even more that every man has a good reason for killing him,’ said Mulvaney.

‘Happen there was a lass tewed up wi’ it. Men do more than more for th’ sake of a lass.’

‘Maybe there was a girl involved with it. Men do a lot more for a girl.’

‘They make most av us ‘list. They’ve no manner av right to make us desert.’

‘They make most of us submit. They have no right to force us to abandon our beliefs.’

‘Ah; they make us ‘list, or their fathers do,’ said Learoyd softly, his helmet over his eyes. Ortheris’s brows contracted savagely. He was watching the valley. ‘If it’s a girl I’ll shoot the beggar twice over, an’ second time for bein’ a fool. You’re blasted sentimental all of a sudden. Thinkin’ o’ your last near shave?’

‘Ah, they make us listen, or their dads do,’ said Learoyd softly, his helmet pulled down over his eyes. Ortheris’s brows knitted in anger. He was watching the valley. ‘If it’s a girl, I’ll shoot the guy twice, and a second time for being an idiot. You’re so sappy all of a sudden. Thinking about your last close call?’

‘Nay, lad; ah was but thinkin’ o’ what had happened.’

‘No, kid; I was just thinking about what happened.’

‘An’ fwhat has happened, ye lumberin’ child av calamity, that you’re lowing like a cow-calf at the back av the pasture, an’ suggestin’ invidious excuses for the man Stanley’s goin’ to kill. Ye’ll have to wait another hour yet, little man. Spit it out, Jock, an’ bellow melojus to the moon. It takes an earthquake or a bullet graze to fetch aught out av you. Discourse, Don Juan! The a-moors av Lotharius Learoyd! Stanley, kape a rowlin’ rig’mental eye on the valley.’

‘And what has happened to you, you lumbering child of misfortune, that you’re mooing like a calf in the back of the pasture, and making ridiculous excuses for the man Stanley’s about to kill? You’ll have to wait another hour, little man. Spit it out, Jock, and howl melodiously to the moon. It takes an earthquake or a bullet graze to get anything out of you. Talk, Don Juan! The moors of Lotharius Learoyd! Stanley, keep a watchful eye on the valley.’

‘It’s along o’ yon hill there,’ said Learoyd, watching the bare sub-Himalayan spur that reminded him of his Yorkshire moors. He was speaking more to himself than his fellows. ‘Ay,’ said he, ‘Rumbolds Moor stands up ower Skipton town, an’ Greenhow Hill stands up ower Pately Brig. I reckon you’ve never heeard tell o’ Greenhow Hill, but you bit o’ bare stuff if there was nobbut a white road windin’ is like ut; strangely like. Moors an’ moors an’ moors, wi’ never a tree for shelter, an’ gray houses wi’ flagstone rooves, and pewits cryin’, an’ a windhover goin’ to and fro just like these kites. And cold! A wind that cuts you like a knife. You could tell Greenhow Hill folk by the red-apple colour o’ their cheeks an’ nose tips, and their blue eyes, driven into pinpoints by the wind. Miners mostly, burrowin’ for lead i’ th’ hillsides, followin’ the trail of th’ ore vein same as a field-rat. It was the roughest minin’ I ever seen. Yo’d come on a bit o’ creakin’ wood windlass like a well-head, an’ you was let down i’ th’ bight of a rope, fendin’ yoursen off the side wi’ one hand, carryin’ a candle stuck in a lump o’ clay with t’other, an’ clickin’ hold of a rope with t’other hand.’

"It’s over that hill," said Learoyd, looking at the bare sub-Himalayan spur that reminded him of his Yorkshire moors. He was talking more to himself than to the others. "Yeah," he continued, "Rumbolds Moor rises over Skipton town, and Greenhow Hill stands over Pately Brig. I bet you’ve never heard of Greenhow Hill, but it’s a bit of bare land that if there was just a white road winding through it, it would look strangely similar. Moors and moors and moors, with not a single tree for shelter, and gray houses with slate roofs, and lapwings crying, and a kestrel moving back and forth just like these kites. And it’s cold! A wind that cuts through you like a knife. You could spot people from Greenhow Hill by the red-apple color of their cheeks and noses, and their blue eyes, shrunk down to pinpoints by the wind. Mostly miners, digging for lead in the hillsides, following the vein of ore like a field rat. It was the roughest mining I’ve ever seen. You’d come across a creaking wooden windlass like a well-head, and you’d be lowered down by a rope, using one hand to keep yourself steady against the side, holding a candle stuck in a lump of clay with the other, and grabbing the rope with your other hand."

‘An’ that’s three of them,’ said Mulvaney. ‘Must be a good climate in those parts.’

‘And that’s three of them,’ said Mulvaney. ‘There must be a good climate in those areas.’

Learoyd took no heed.

Learoyd ignored it.

‘An’ then yo’ came to a level, where you crept on your hands and knees through a mile o’ windin’ drift, an’ you come out into a cave-place as big as Leeds Townhall, with a engine pumpin’ water from workin’s ‘at went deeper still. It’s a queer country, let alone minin’, for the hill is full of those natural caves, an’ the rivers an’ the becks drops into what they call pot-holes, an’ come out again miles away.’

‘And then you reached a point where you crawled on your hands and knees through a mile of twisting passage, and you emerged into a cavern as big as Leeds Town Hall, with a pump running water from mines that went even deeper. It’s a strange place, especially for mining, because the hill is full of natural caves, and the rivers and streams drop into what they call potholes and come out again miles away.’

‘Wot was you doin’ there?’ said Ortheris.

“What were you doing there?” said Ortheris.

‘I was a young chap then, an’ mostly went wi’ ‘osses, leadin’ coal and lead ore; but at th’ time I’m tellin’ on I was drivin’ the waggon-team i’ th’ big sumph. I didn’t belong to that country-side by rights. I went there because of a little difference at home, an’ at fust I took up wi’ a rough lot. One night we’d been drinkin’, an’ I must ha’ hed more than I could stand, or happen th’ ale was none so good. Though i’ them days, By for God, I never seed bad ale.’ He flung his arms over his head, and gripped a vast handful of white violets. ‘Nah,’ said he, ‘I never seed the ale I could not drink, the bacca I could not smoke, nor the lass I could not kiss. Well, we mun have a race home, the lot on us. I lost all th’ others, an’ when I was climbin’ ower one of them walls built o’ loose stones, I comes down into the ditch, stones and all, an’ broke my arm. Not as I knawed much about it, for I fell on th’ back of my head, an’ was knocked stupid like. An’ when I come to mysen it were mornin’, an’ I were lyin’ on the settle i’ Jesse Roantree’s houseplace, an’ ‘Liza Roantree was settin’ sewin’, I ached all ovver, and my mouth were like a lime-kiln. She gave me a drink out of a china mug wi’ gold letters—“A Present from Leeds”—as I looked at many and many a time at after. “Yo’re to lie still while Dr. Warbottom comes, because your arm’s broken, and father has sent a lad to fetch him. He found yo’ when he was goin’ to work, an’ carried you here on his back,” sez she. “Oa!” sez I; an’ I shet my eyes, for I felt ashamed o’ mysen. “Father’s gone to his work these three hours, an’ he said he’d tell ‘em to get somebody to drive the tram.” The clock ticked, an’ a bee comed in the house, an’ they rung i’ my head like mill-wheels. An’ she give me another drink an’ settled the pillow. “Eh, but yo’re young to be getten drunk an’ such like, but yo’ won’t do it again, will yo’?”—“Noa,” sez I, “I wouldn’t if she’d not but stop they mill-wheels clatterin’.”’

‘I was a young guy back then, mostly working with horses, hauling coal and lead ore; but at the time I’m talking about, I was driving the wagon team in the big swamp. I didn’t really belong to that area. I ended up there because of some trouble at home, and at first, I got mixed up with a rough crowd. One night we’d been drinking, and I must have had more than I could handle, or maybe the beer just wasn’t that great. Although back then, honestly, I never saw bad beer.’ He threw his arms over his head and grabbed a big handful of white violets. ‘Nah,’ he said, ‘I never saw a beer I couldn’t drink, a cigarette I couldn’t smoke, or a girl I couldn’t kiss. Well, we should race home, all of us. I lost the others, and when I was climbing over one of those walls made of loose stones, I fell into the ditch, stones and all, and broke my arm. Not that I knew much about it because I landed on the back of my head and was knocked out. And when I came to, it was morning, and I was lying on the couch in Jesse Roantree’s house, and ‘Liza Roantree was sitting there sewing. I ached all over, and my mouth felt like a lime kiln. She gave me a drink from a china mug with gold letters—“A Present from Leeds”—that I stared at many times afterward. “You need to lie still until Dr. Warbottom arrives because your arm’s broken, and Dad sent a kid to get him. He found you when he was going to work and carried you here on his back,” she said. “Oh!” I said; and I shut my eyes because I felt embarrassed. “Dad’s been gone to work for three hours, and he said he’d tell them to get someone to drive the tram.” The clock ticked, and a bee came into the house, buzzing around in my head like mill wheels. And she gave me another drink and adjusted the pillow. “Eh, but you’re young to be getting drunk and all that; you won’t do it again, will you?”—“No,” I said, “I wouldn’t if only those mill wheels would stop clattering.”

‘Faith, it’s a good thing to be nursed by a woman when you’re sick!’ said Mulvaney. ‘Dir’ cheap at the price av twenty broken heads.’

‘Faith, it’s a good thing to be taken care of by a woman when you’re sick!’ said Mulvaney. ‘Dirt cheap at the price of twenty broken heads.’

Ortheris turned to frown across the valley. He had not been nursed by many women in his life.

Ortheris turned to glare across the valley. He hadn't been cared for by many women in his life.

‘An’ then Dr. Warbottom comes ridin’ up, an’ Jesse Roantree along with ‘im. He was a high-larned doctor, but he talked wi’ poor folk same as theirsens. “What’s ta big agaate on naa?” he sings out. “Brekkin’ tha thick head?” An’ he felt me all ovver. “That’s none broken. Tha’ nobbut knocked a bit sillier than ordinary, an’ that’s daaft eneaf.” An’ soa he went on, callin’ me all the names he could think on, but settin’ my arm, wi’ Jesse’s help, as careful as could be. “Yo’ mun let the big oaf bide here a bit, Jesse,” he says, when he hed strapped me up an’ given me a dose o’ physic; “an’ you an’ Liza will tend him, though he’s scarcelins worth the trouble. An’ tha’ll lose tha work,” sez he, “an’ tha’ll be upon th’ Sick Club for a couple o’ months an’ more. Doesn’t tha think tha’s a fool?”’

‘And then Dr. Warbottom rides up, with Jesse Roantree alongside him. He was a highly educated doctor, but he spoke to the common folks just like they did. “What’s all the fuss about?” he called out. “Cracking that thick skull?” And he examined me all over. “Nothing’s broken. You’re just a bit dazed, and that’s enough of a fool's mistake.” And so he kept going, calling me all the names he could think of, but he set my arm, with Jesse’s help, as carefully as he could. “You’ll need to let the big oaf rest here for a bit, Jesse,” he says, after he had strapped me up and given me some medicine; “and you and Liza will take care of him, even though he’s barely worth the trouble. And that means you’ll lose work,” he said, “and you’ll be on the Sick Club for a couple of months or more. Don’t you think that’s foolish?”’

‘But whin was a young man, high or low, the other av a fool, I’d like to know?’ said Mulvaney. ‘Sure, folly’s the only safe way to wisdom, for I’ve thried it.’

‘But when was a young man, rich or poor, the other of a fool, I’d like to know?’ said Mulvaney. ‘Sure, foolishness is the only safe path to wisdom, because I’ve tried it.’

‘Wisdom!’ grinned Ortheris, scanning his comrades with uplifted chin. ‘You’re bloomin’ Solomons, you two, ain’t you?’

‘Wisdom!’ grinned Ortheris, looking at his comrades with his chin held high. ‘You’re a couple of real geniuses, aren’t you?’

Learoyd went calmly on, with a steady eye like an ox chewing the cud.

Learoyd continued on calmly, with a steady gaze like an ox chewing its cud.

‘And that was how I come to know ‘Liza Roantree. There’s some tunes as she used to sing—aw, she were always singin’—that fetches Greenhow Hill before my eyes as fair as yon brow across there. And she would learn me to sing bass, an’ I was to go to th’ chapel wi’ ‘em where Jesse and she led the singin’, th’ old man playin’ the fiddle. He was a strange chap, old Jesse, fair mad wi’ music, an’ he made me promise to learn the big fiddle when my arm was better. It belonged to him, and it stood up in a big case alongside o’ th’ eight-day clock, but Willie Satterthwaite, as played it in the chapel, had getten deaf as a door-post, and it vexed Jesse, as he had to rap him ower his head wi’ th’ fiddle-stick to make him give ower sawin’ at th’ right time.

‘And that’s how I got to know ‘Liza Roantree. There are some tunes she used to sing—oh, she was always singing—that bring Greenhow Hill to mind as clearly as that hill over there. She taught me to sing bass, and I was supposed to go to the chapel with them where Jesse and she led the singing, with the old man playing the fiddle. He was a peculiar guy, old Jesse, completely obsessed with music, and he made me promise to learn the big fiddle when my arm was better. It belonged to him, and it stood in a big case next to the eight-day clock, but Willie Satterthwaite, who played it in the chapel, had gone deaf as a post, and it annoyed Jesse, as he had to tap him on the head with the fiddle stick to make him stop playing at the wrong time.

‘But there was a black drop in it all, an’ it was a man in a black coat that brought it. When th’ Primitive Methodist preacher came to Greenhow, he would always stop wi’ Jesse Roantree, an’ he laid hold of me from th’ beginning. It seemed I wor a soul to be saved, and he meaned to do it. At th’ same time I jealoused ‘at he were keen o’ savin’ ‘Liza Roantree’s soul as well, and I could ha’ killed him many a time. An’ this went on till one day I broke out, an’ borrowed th’ brass for a drink from ‘Liza. After fower days I come back, wi’ my tail between my legs, just to see ‘Liza again. But Jesse were at home an’ th’ preacher—th’ Reverend Amos Barraclough. ‘Liza said naught, but a bit o’ red come into her face as were white of a regular thing. Says Jesse, tryin’ his best to be civil, “Nay, lad, it’s like this. You’ve getten to choose which way it’s goin’ to be. I’ll ha’ nobody across ma doorstep as goes a-drinkin’, an’ borrows my lass’s money to spend i’ their drink. Ho’d tha tongue, ‘Liza,” sez he, when she wanted to put in a word ‘at I were welcome to th’ brass, and she were none afraid that I wouldn’t pay it back. Then the Reverend cuts in, seein’ as Jesse were losin’ his temper, an’ they fair beat me among them. But it were ‘Liza, as looked an’ said naught, as did more than either o’ their tongues, an’ soa I concluded to get converted.’

‘But there was a dark cloud over everything, and it was a man in a black coat who brought it. When the Primitive Methodist preacher came to Greenhow, he would always stay with Jesse Roantree, and he took an interest in me from the start. It seemed I was a soul to be saved, and he intended to do just that. At the same time, I was jealous that he was just as eager to save ‘Liza Roantree’s soul, and I could have killed him many times over. This went on until one day I snapped and borrowed some money from ‘Liza for a drink. After four days, I came back, feeling ashamed, just to see ‘Liza again. But Jesse was home, along with the preacher—Reverend Amos Barraclough. ‘Liza didn’t say anything, but a bit of color came into her usually pale face. Jesse, trying his best to be polite, said, “No, lad, it’s like this. You’ve got to choose which way this is going to go. I won’t have anyone at my doorstep who drinks and borrows my girl’s money to spend on booze. Shut your mouth, ‘Liza,” he said, when she tried to say I was welcome to the money, and she wasn’t worried I wouldn’t pay it back. Then the Reverend jumped in, seeing that Jesse was losing his cool, and they really laid into me together. But it was ‘Liza, who looked and said nothing, that did more than either of their words, and so I decided to get converted.’

‘Fwhat?’ shouted Mulvaney. Then, checking himself, he said softly, ‘Let be! Let be! Sure the Blessed Virgin is the mother of all religion an’ most women; an’ there’s a dale av piety in a girl if the men would only let ut stay there. I’d ha’ been converted myself under the circumstances.’

‘What?’ shouted Mulvaney. Then, catching himself, he said softly, ‘Let it be! Let it be! Of course, the Blessed Virgin is the mother of all religion and most women; and there’s a lot of piety in a girl if the men would just let it stay there. I would have been converted myself under the circumstances.’

‘Nay, but,’ pursued Learoyd with a blush, ‘I meaned it.’

‘No, but,’ continued Learoyd, blushing, ‘I meant it.’

Ortheris laughed as loudly as he dared, having regard to his business at the time.

Ortheris laughed as loud as he could, considering his situation at the moment.

‘Ay, Ortheris, you may laugh, but you didn’t know yon preacher Barraclough—a little white-faced chap, wi’ a voice as ‘ud wile a bird off an a bush, and a way o’ layin’ hold of folks as made them think they’d never had a live man for a friend before. You never saw him, an’—an’—you never seed ‘Liza Roantree—never seed ‘Liza Roantree.... Happen it was as much ‘Liza as th’ preacher and her father, but anyways they all meaned it, an’ I was fair shamed o’ mysen, an’ so I become what they call a changed character. And when I think on, it’s hard to believe as yon chap going to prayer-meetin’s, chapel, and class-meetin’s were me. But I never had naught to say for mysen, though there was a deal o’ shoutin’, and old Sammy Strother, as were almost clemmed to death and doubled up with the rheumatics, would sing out, “Joyful! Joyful!” and ‘at it were better to go up to heaven in a coal-basket than down to hell i’ a coach an’ six. And he would put his poor old claw on my shoulder, sayin’, “Doesn’t tha feel it, tha great lump? Doesn’t tha feel it?” An’ sometimes I thought I did, and then again I thought I didn’t, an’ how was that?’

‘Yeah, Ortheris, you can laugh, but you didn’t know that preacher Barraclough—a little pale guy, with a voice that could charm a bird off a bush, and a way of connecting with people that made them feel like they’d never had a real friend before. You never saw him, and—and—you never saw ‘Liza Roantree—you never saw ‘Liza Roantree.... Maybe it was just as much ‘Liza as the preacher and her father, but anyway, they all meant it, and I was honestly ashamed of myself, and so I became what they call a changed person. And when I think about it, it’s hard to believe that that guy going to prayer meetings, chapel, and class meetings was me. But I never had anything to say for myself, even though there was a lot of shouting, and old Sammy Strother, who was almost starving to death and doubled over with rheumatism, would shout, “Joyful! Joyful!” and that it was better to go up to heaven in a coal basket than down to hell in a fancy carriage. And he would put his old hand on my shoulder, saying, “Don’t you feel it, you big lump? Don’t you feel it?” And sometimes I thought I did, and then again I thought I didn’t, and how was that?’

‘The iverlastin’ nature av mankind,’ said Mulvaney. ‘An’, furthermore, I misdoubt you were built for the Primitive Methodians. They’re a new corps anyways. I hold by the Ould Church, for she’s the mother of them all—ay, an’ the father, too. I like her bekaze she’s most remarkable regimental in her fittings. I may die in Honolulu, Nova Zambra, or Cape Cayenne, but wherever I die, me bein’ fwhat I am, an’ a priest handy, I go under the same orders an’ the same words an’ the same unction as tho’ the Pope himself come down from the roof av St. Peter’s to see me off. There’s neither high nor low, nor broad nor deep, nor betwixt nor between wid her, an’ that’s what I like. But mark you, she’s no manner av Church for a wake man, bekaze she takes the body and the soul av him, onless he has his proper work to do. I remember when my father died that was three months comin’ to his grave; begad he’d ha’ sold the shebeen above our heads for ten minutes’ quittance of purgathory. An’ he did all he could. That’s why I say ut takes a strong man to deal with the Ould Church, an’ for that reason you’ll find so many women go there. An’ that same’s a conundrum.’

‘The everlasting nature of mankind,’ said Mulvaney. ‘And, besides, I doubt you were made for the Primitive Methodists. They’re a new group anyway. I stand by the Old Church, as she’s the mother of them all—yes, and the father too. I appreciate her because she’s incredibly consistent in her practices. I might die in Honolulu, Nova Zambra, or Cape Cayenne, but wherever I die, being what I am, and with a priest nearby, I’ll go under the same rites, the same words, and the same blessing as if the Pope himself came down from the roof of St. Peter’s to see me off. With her, there’s neither high nor low, nor broad nor deep, nor in-between, and that’s what I like. But let me tell you, she’s no church for a man who’s awake because she takes both his body and soul, unless he has his proper work to do. I remember when my father died, it took three months to get him to his grave; he would have sold the bar above our heads for ten minutes off purgatory. And he did everything he could. That’s why I say it takes a strong man to deal with the Old Church, and for that reason, you’ll find so many women go there. And that’s quite a puzzle.’

‘Wot’s the use o’ worritin’ ‘bout these things?’ said Ortheris. ‘You’re bound to find all out quicker nor you want to, any’ow.’ He jerked the cartridge out of the breech-block into the palm of his hand. ‘’Ere’s my chaplain,’ he said, and made the venomous black-headed bullet bow like a marionette. ‘’E’s goin’ to teach a man all about which is which, an’ wot’s true, after all, before sundown. But wot ‘appened after that, Jock?’

“What's the point of worrying about these things?” Ortheris said. “You're bound to find everything out faster than you want to, anyway.” He flicked the cartridge out of the breech-block into his palm. “Here’s my chaplain,” he said, making the menacing black-headed bullet bow like a puppet. “He’s going to teach a guy all about what’s what and what’s true, after all, before sundown. But what happened after that, Jock?”

‘There was one thing they boggled at, and almost shut th’ gate i’ my face for, and that were my dog Blast, th’ only one saved out o’ a litter o’ pups as was blowed up when a keg o’ minin’ powder loosed off in th’ store-keeper’s hut. They liked his name no better than his business, which were fightin’ every dog he comed across; a rare good dog, wi’ spots o’ black and pink on his face, one ear gone, and lame o’ one side wi’ being driven in a basket through an iron roof, a matter of half a mile.

‘There was one thing they were shocked by, and almost shut the gate in my face for, and that was my dog Blast, the only one saved from a litter of pups that got blown up when a keg of mining powder went off in the storekeeper’s hut. They didn’t like his name any better than his behavior, which was to fight every dog he came across; a truly good dog, with spots of black and pink on his face, one ear missing, and limping on one side from being carried in a basket through an iron roof, a distance of half a mile.

‘They said I mun give him up ‘cause he were worldly and low; and would I let mysen be shut out of heaven for the sake on a dog? “Nay,” says I, “if th’ door isn’t wide enough for th’ pair on us, we’ll stop outside, for we’ll none be parted.” And th’ preacher spoke up for Blast, as had a likin’ for him from th’ first—I reckon that was why I come to like th’ preacher—and wouldn’t hear o’ changin’ his name to Bless, as some o’ them wanted. So th’ pair on us became reg’lar chapel-members. But it’s hard for a young chap o’ my build to cut traces from the world, th’ flesh, an’ the devil all uv a heap. Yet I stuck to it for a long time, while th’ lads as used to stand about th’ town-end an’ lean ower th’ bridge, spittin’ into th’ beck o’ a Sunday, would call after me, “Sitha, Learoyd, when’s ta bean to preach, ‘cause we’re comin’ to hear tha.”—“Ho’d tha jaw. He hasn’t getten th’ white choaker on ta morn,” another lad would say, and I had to double my fists hard i’ th’ bottom of my Sunday coat, and say to mysen, “If ‘twere Monday and I warn’t a member o’ the Primitive Methodists, I’d leather all th’ lot of yond’.” That was th’ hardest of all—to know that I could fight and I mustn’t fight.’

"They said I had to give him up because he was too worldly and low; and would I let myself be shut out of heaven for the sake of a dog? “No,” I said, “if the door isn’t wide enough for both of us, we’ll stay outside, because we won’t be parted.” And the preacher stood up for Blast, as he had liked him from the start—I think that’s why I came to like the preacher—and wouldn’t hear of changing his name to Bless, as some of them wanted. So the two of us became regular chapel members. But it’s tough for a young guy like me to break away from the world, the flesh, and the devil all at once. Yet I stuck with it for a long time, while the boys who used to hang around the town end and lean over the bridge, spitting into the stream on Sundays, would call after me, “Hey, Learoyd, when are you going to preach, because we’re coming to hear you.” —“Shut your mouth. He hasn’t put on the white collar for tomorrow,” another boy would say, and I had to clench my fists hard in the bottom of my Sunday coat, and tell myself, “If it were Monday and I wasn’t a member of the Primitive Methodists, I’d beat all of them up.” That was the hardest part—to know that I could fight and I wasn’t allowed to fight."

Sympathetic grunts from Mulvaney.

Sympathetic sounds from Mulvaney.

‘So what wi’ singin’, practising and class-meetin’s, and th’ big fiddle, as he made me take between my knees, I spent a deal o’ time i’ Jesse Roantree’s house-place. But often as I was there, th’ preacher fared to me to go oftener, and both th’ old man an’ th’ young woman were pleased to have him. He lived i’ Pately Brig, as were a goodish step off, but he come. He come all the same. I liked him as well or better as any man I’d ever seen i’ one way, and yet I hated him wi’ all my heart i’ t’other, and we watched each other like cat and mouse, but civil as you please, for I was on my best behaviour, and he was that fair and open that I was bound to be fair with him. Rare good company he was, if I hadn’t wanted to wring his cliver little neck half of the time. Often and often when he was goin’ from Jesse’s I’d set him a bit on the road.’

‘So with singing, practicing, and class meetings, and the big fiddle he made me hold between my knees, I spent a lot of time in Jesse Roantree’s house. But every time I was there, the preacher kept telling me to come more often, and both the old man and the young woman were happy to have him. He lived in Pately Brig, which was quite a distance away, but he came anyway. I liked him just as much, or even more than any man I had ever met in one way, and yet I hated him with all my heart in another way, and we watched each other like cat and mouse, but politely, of course, because I was on my best behavior, and he was so fair and straightforward that I felt I had to be fair with him. He was really good company, even if half the time I wanted to wring his clever little neck. Often when he was leaving Jesse's, I’d walk him part of the way.’

‘See ‘im ‘ome, you mean?’ said Ortheris.

‘You mean taking him home?’ said Ortheris.

‘Ay. It’s a way we have i’ Yorkshire o’ seein’ friends off. You was a friend as I didn’t want to come back, and he didn’t want me to come back neither, and so we’d walk together towards Pately, and then he’d set me back again, and there we’d be wal two o’clock i’ the mornin’ settin’ each other to an’ fro like a blasted pair o’ pendulums twixt hill and valley, long after th’ light had gone out i’ ‘Liza’s window, as both on us had been looking at, pretending to watch the moon.’

‘Yeah. It’s how we say goodbye to friends in Yorkshire. You were a friend I didn’t want to come back, and he didn’t want me to come back either, so we’d walk together toward Pately, and then he’d send me back again. There we’d be, at two o’clock in the morning, sending each other back and forth like a couple of pendulums between the hills and valleys, long after the light had gone out in ‘Liza’s window, which we’d both been looking at, pretending to watch the moon.’

‘Ah!’ broke in Mulvaney, ‘ye’d no chanst against the maraudin’ psalm-singer. They’ll take the airs an’ the graces instid av the man nine times out av ten, an’ they only find the blunder later—the wimmen.’

‘Ah!’ interrupted Mulvaney, ‘you’ve got no chance against the marauding psalm-singer. They’ll prefer the charm and grace instead of the man nine times out of ten, and they only realize their mistake later—the women.’

‘That’s just where yo’re wrong,’ said Learoyd, reddening under the freckled tan of his cheeks. ‘I was th’ first wi’ ‘Liza, an’ yo’d think that were enough. But th’ parson were a steady-gaited sort o’ chap, and Jesse were strong o’ his side, and all th’ women i’ the congregation dinned it to ‘Liza ‘at she were fair fond to take up wi’ a wastrel ne’er-do-weel like me, as was scarcelins respectable an’ a fighting dog at his heels. It was all very well for her to be doing me good and saving my soul, but she must mind as she didn’t do herself harm. They talk o’ rich folk bein’ stuck up an’ genteel, but for cast-iron pride o’ respectability there’s naught like poor chapel folk. It’s as cold as th’ wind o’ Greenhow Hill—ay, and colder, for ‘twill never change. And now I come to think on it, one at strangest things I know is ‘at they couldn’t abide th’ thought o’ soldiering. There’s a vast o’ fightin’ i’ th’ Bible, and there’s a deal of Methodists i’ th’ army; but to hear chapel folk talk yo’d think that soldierin’ were next door, an’ t’other side, to hangin’. I’ their meetin’s all their talk is o’ fightin’. When Sammy Strother were stuck for summat to say in his prayers, he’d sing out, “Th’ sword o’ th’ Lord and o’ Gideon.” They were allus at it about puttin’ on th’ whole armour o’ righteousness, an’ fightin’ the good fight o’ faith. And then, atop o’ ‘t all, they held a prayer-meetin’ ower a young chap as wanted to ‘list, and nearly deafened him, till he picked up his hat and fair ran away. And they’d tell tales in th’ Sunday-school o’ bad lads as had been thumped and brayed for bird-nesting o’ Sundays and playin’ truant o’ week-days, and how they took to wrestlin’, dog-fightin’, rabbit-runnin’, and drinkin’, till at last, as if ‘twere a hepitaph on a gravestone, they damned him across th’ moors wi’, “an’ then he went and ‘listed for a soldier,” an’ they’d all fetch a deep breath, and throw up their eyes like a hen drinkin’.’

"That’s where you’re wrong," said Learoyd, reddening under the freckles on his cheeks. "I was the first with ‘Liza, and you’d think that would be enough. But the parson was a steady sort of guy, and Jesse was strong on his side, and all the women in the congregation kept telling ‘Liza that she was foolish for wanting to be with a wastrel like me, who was hardly respectable and had a fighting dog at his heels. It was nice of her to try to help me and save my soul, but she needed to be careful not to hurt herself in the process. They say rich people are stuck-up and snobby, but for stubborn pride in respectability, nothing beats poor chapel folks. It’s as cold as the wind from Greenhow Hill—actually colder, because it’ll never change. And now that I think about it, one of the strangest things I know is that they couldn’t stand the thought of soldiering. There’s a lot of fighting in the Bible, and plenty of Methodists in the army; but from listening to chapel folks, you’d think that soldiering was almost as bad as hanging. In their meetings, all they talk about is fighting. When Sammy Strother couldn’t think of anything to say in his prayers, he’d shout, “The sword of the Lord and of Gideon.” They were always going on about putting on the whole armor of righteousness and fighting the good fight of faith. And on top of that, they held a prayer meeting over a young guy who wanted to enlist, and nearly scared him away until he grabbed his hat and ran. They’d tell stories in Sunday school about bad boys who got into trouble for bird-nesting on Sundays and skipping school on weekdays, and how they took to wrestling, dogfighting, rabbit-running, and drinking, until finally, as if it were an epitaph on a gravestone, they’d condemn him with, “and then he went and enlisted as a soldier,” and everyone would take a deep breath and roll their eyes like a hen drinking."

‘Fwhy is ut?’ said Mulvaney, bringing down his hand on his thigh with a crack.’ In the name av God, fwhy is ut? I’ve seen ut, tu. They cheat an’ they swindle an’ they lie an’ they slander, an’ fifty things fifty times worse; but the last an’ the worst by their reckonin’ is to serve the Widdy honest. It’s like the talk av childher—seein’ things all round.’

‘Why is it?’ said Mulvaney, slapping his thigh with a crack. ‘In the name of God, why is it? I’ve seen it too. They cheat and they swindle and they lie and they slander, and fifty things fifty times worse; but the last and the worst, by their standards, is to treat the widow honestly. It’s like the talk of children—seeing things all around.’

‘Plucky lot of fightin’ good fights of whatsername they’d do if we didn’t see they had a quiet place to fight in. And such fightin’ as theirs is! Cats on the tiles. T’other callin’ to which to come on. I’d give a month’s pay to get some o’ them broad-backed beggars in London sweatin’ through a day’s road-makin’ an’ a night’s rain. They’d carry on a deal afterwards—same as we’re supposed to carry on. I’ve bin turned out of a measly arf-license pub down Lambeth way, full o’ greasy kebmen, ‘fore now,’ said Ortheris with an oath.

‘What a brave bunch they are, always ready for a fight if we didn't notice they had a safe place to deal with it. And the kind of fighting they do! Cats on the tiles. One calling over to the other. I’d give a month’s pay to see some of those big guys from London sweating through a day of road work and a night of rain. They’d complain a lot afterwards—just like we’re expected to. I’ve been kicked out of a lousy pub down in Lambeth, packed with greasy kebab guys, before now,’ said Ortheris with an oath.

‘Maybe you were dhrunk,’ said Mulvaney soothingly.

‘Maybe you were drunk,’ said Mulvaney soothingly.

‘Worse nor that. The Forders were drunk. I was wearin’ the Queen’s uniform.’

‘Worse than that. The Forders were drunk. I was wearing the Queen’s uniform.’

‘I’d no particular thought to be a soldier i’ them days,’ said Learoyd, still keeping his eye on the bare hill opposite, ‘but this sort o’ talk put it i’ my head. They was so good, th’ chapel folk, that they tumbled ower t’other side. But I stuck to it for ‘Liza’s sake, specially as she was learning me to sing the bass part in a horotorio as Jesse were gettin’ up. She sung like a throstle hersen, and we had practisin’s night after night for a matter of three months.’

"I never really thought about being a soldier back then," Learoyd said, still watching the bare hill across from him. "But this kind of talk got me thinking. The chapel folks were so good that they fell to the other side. But I held on for 'Liza’s sake, especially since she was teaching me to sing the bass part in a oratorio that Jesse was putting together. She sang like a thrush herself, and we practiced night after night for about three months."

‘I know what a horotorio is,’ said Ortheris pertly. ‘It’s a sort of chaplain’s sing-song—words all out of the Bible, and hullabaloojah choruses.’

‘I know what a horatorio is,’ said Ortheris snappily. ‘It’s basically a chaplain’s sing-along—words all from the Bible, and loud hallelujah choruses.’

‘Most Greenhow Hill folks played some instrument or t’other, an’ they all sung so you might have heard them miles away, and they were so pleased wi’ the noise they made they didn’t fair to want anybody to listen. The preacher sung high seconds when he wasn’t playin’ the flute, an’ they set me, as hadn’t got far with big fiddle, again Willie Satterthwaite, to jog his elbow when he had to get a’ gate playin’. Old Jesse was happy if ever a man was, for he were th’ conductor an’ th’ first fiddle an’ th’ leadin’ singer, beatin’ time wi’ his fiddle-stick, till at times he’d rap with it on the table, and cry out, “Now, you mun all stop; it’s my turn.” And he’d face round to his front, fair sweating wi’ pride, to sing th’ tenor solos. But he were grandest i’ th’ choruses, waggin’ his head, flinging his arms round like a windmill, and singin’ hisself black in the face. A rare singer were Jesse.

‘Most folks from Greenhow Hill played some instrument or another, and they all sang loud enough for you to hear them from miles away. They were so happy with the noise they made that they didn’t really care if anyone was listening. The preacher would sing high harmonies when he wasn’t playing the flute, and they’d have me, who hadn’t progressed much with the big fiddle, sit next to Willie Satterthwaite to nudge his elbow when he needed to get a note in. Old Jesse was as happy as anyone could be; he was the conductor, the first fiddle, and the lead singer, keeping time with his fiddle stick. Sometimes he would tap it on the table and shout, “Now, you all stop; it’s my turn.” Then he’d turn to the front, practically sweating with pride, to sing the tenor solos. But he was best in the choruses, bobbing his head, flinging his arms around like a windmill, and singing himself so hard he turned blue in the face. Jesse was an exceptional singer.

‘Yo’ see, I was not o’ much account wi’ ‘em all exceptin’ to ‘Liza Roantree, and I had a deal o’ time settin’ quiet at meetings and horotorio practises to hearken their talk, and if it were strange to me at beginnin’, it got stranger still at after, when I was shut on it, and could study what it meaned.

‘You see, I didn’t really have much to do with any of them except for ‘Liza Roantree, and I spent a lot of time sitting quietly at meetings and rehearsals to listen to their conversations. If it felt strange to me at first, it got even stranger later on when I reflected on it and could figure out what it meant.

‘Just after th’ horotorios come off, ‘Liza, as had allus been weakly like, was took very bad. I walked Dr. Warbottom’s horse up and down a deal of times while he were inside, where they wouldn’t let me go, though I fair ached to see her.

‘Just after the horotorios came off, ‘Liza, who had always been a bit weak, got very sick. I walked Dr. Warbottom’s horse back and forth many times while he was inside, where they wouldn’t let me go, even though I really wanted to see her.

‘“She’ll be better i’ noo, lad—better i’ noo,” he used to say. “Tha mun ha’ patience.” Then they said if I was quiet I might go in, and th’ Reverend Amos Barraclough used to read to her lyin’ propped up among th’ pillows. Then she began to mend a bit, and they let me carry her on to th’ settle, and when it got warm again she went about same as afore. Th’ preacher and me and Blast was a deal together i’ them days, and i’ one way we was rare good comrades. But I could ha’ stretched him time and again with a good will. I mind one day he said he would like to go down into th’ bowels o’ th’ earth, and see how th’ Lord had builded th’ framework o’ th’ everlastin’ hills. He were one of them chaps as had a gift o’ sayin’ things. They rolled off the tip of his clever tongue, same as Mulvaney here, as would ha’ made a rare good preacher if he had nobbut given his mind to it. I lent him a suit o’ miner’s kit as almost buried th’ little man, and his white face down i’ th’ coat-collar and hat-flap looked like the face of a boggart, and he cowered down i’ th’ bottom o’ the waggon. I was drivin’ a tram as led up a bit of an incline up to th’ cave where the engine was pumpin’, and where th’ ore was brought up and put into th’ waggons as went down o’ themselves, me puttin’ th’ brake on and th’ horses a-trottin’ after. Long as it was daylight we were good friends, but when we got fair into th’ dark, and could nobbut see th’ day shinin’ at the hole like a lamp at a street-end, I feeled downright wicked. Ma religion dropped all away from me when I looked back at him as were always comin’ between me and ‘Liza. The talk was ‘at they were to be wed when she got better, an’ I couldn’t get her to say yes or nay to it. He began to sing a hymn in his thin voice, and I came out wi’ a chorus that was all cussin’ an’ swearin’ at my horses, an’ I began to know how I hated him. He were such a little chap, too. I could drop him wi’ one hand down Garstang’s Copper-hole—a place where th’ beck slithered ower th’ edge on a rock, and fell wi’ a bit of a whisper into a pit as no rope i’ Greenhow could plump.’

‘“She’ll be better soon, lad—better soon,” he used to say. “You must have patience.” Then they said if I was quiet I might go in, and Reverend Amos Barraclough would read to her while she was propped up among the pillows. Then she started to improve a bit, and they let me carry her onto the settle, and when it warmed up again, she was back to her old self. The preacher, me, and Blast spent a lot of time together in those days, and in some ways we were really good friends. But I could have taken him down easily if I wanted to. I remember one day he said he would like to go down into the depths of the earth and see how the Lord had built the framework of the everlasting hills. He was one of those guys who had a way with words. They rolled off the tip of his clever tongue, just like Mulvaney here, who would have made a fantastic preacher if he had just set his mind to it. I lent him a miner’s suit that almost swallowed the little man, and his white face nestled in the coat collar and hat flap looked like a ghost, and he cowered down in the bottom of the wagon. I was driving a tram that went up a slope to the cave where the engine was pumping, and where the ore was brought up and loaded into wagons that went down by themselves, with me applying the brake and the horses trotting behind. As long as it was daylight, we were good friends, but when we got deep into the dark, and could only see the daylight shining at the entrance like a lamp at the street corner, I felt downright wicked. My faith slipped away from me when I looked back at him, always coming between me and ‘Liza. The talk was that they were going to get married when she got better, and I couldn’t get her to say yes or no about it. He started singing a hymn in his thin voice, and I broke out with a chorus full of cursing and swearing at my horses, and I began to realize how much I hated him. He was such a small guy too. I could easily drop him into Garstang’s Copper-hole—a spot where the stream slipped over the edge of a rock and fell with a soft whisper into a pit that no rope in Greenhow could reach.’

Again Learoyd rooted up the innocent violets. ‘Ay, he should see th’ bowels o’ th’ earth an’ never naught else. I could take him a mile or two along th’ drift, and leave him wi’ his candle doused to cry hallelujah, wi’ none to hear him and say amen. I was to lead him down th’ ladder-way to th’ drift where Jesse Roantree was workin’, and why shouldn’t he slip on th’ ladder, wi’ my feet on his fingers till they loosed grip, and I put him down wi’ my heel? If I went fust down th’ ladder I could click hold on him and chuck him over my head, so as he should go squshin’ down the shaft, breakin’ his bones at ev’ry timberin’ as Bill Appleton did when he was fresh, and hadn’t a bone left when he wrought to th’ bottom. Niver a blasted leg to walk from Pately. Niver an arm to put round ‘Liza Roantree’s waist. Niver no more—niver no more.’

Again, Learoyd pulled up the innocent violets. “Yeah, he should see the depths of the earth and nothing else. I could take him a mile or two along the drift and leave him with his candle blown out to shout hallelujah, with no one to hear him and say amen. I was supposed to lead him down the ladderway to the drift where Jesse Roantree was working, and why shouldn’t he slip on the ladder, with my feet on his fingers until he lost his grip, and I put him down with my heel? If I went down the ladder first, I could grab hold of him and throw him over my head, so he’d go crashing down the shaft, breaking his bones on every timber like Bill Appleton did when he was new, and didn’t have a bone left by the time he got to the bottom. Not even a blasted leg to walk from Pately. Not an arm to put around ‘Liza Roantree’s waist. Never again—never again.”

The thick lips curled back over the yellow teeth, and that flushed face was not pretty to look upon. Mulvaney nodded sympathy, and Ortheris, moved by his comrade’s passion, brought up the rifle to his shoulder, and searched the hillside for his quarry, muttering ribaldry about a sparrow, a spout, and a thunder-storm. The voice of the watercourse supplied the necessary small talk till Learoyd picked up his story.

The thick lips curled back over the yellow teeth, and that flushed face wasn't pretty to look at. Mulvaney nodded in sympathy, and Ortheris, influenced by his friend's passion, raised the rifle to his shoulder and scanned the hillside for his target, mumbling jokes about a sparrow, a spout, and a thunderstorm. The sound of the stream provided enough small talk until Learoyd picked up his story.

‘But it’s none so easy to kill a man like you. When I’d given up my horses to th’ lad as took my place and I was showin’ th’ preacher th’ workin’s, shoutin’ into his ear across th’ clang o’ th’ pumpin’ engines, I saw he were afraid o’ naught; and when the lamplight showed his black eyes, I could feel as he was masterin’ me again. I were no better nor Blast chained up short and growlin’ i’ the depths of him while a strange dog went safe past.

‘But it’s not so easy to kill a man like you. When I’d given my horses to the guy who took my place and I was showing the preacher how things worked, shouting into his ear over the noise of the pumping engines, I could see he wasn’t afraid of anything; and when the lamplight revealed his dark eyes, I felt like he was getting the upper hand on me again. I was no better than Blast, all locked up and growling deep down while a strange dog safely walked by.

‘“Th’art a coward and a fool,” I said to mysen; an’ I wrestled i’ my mind again’ him till, when we come to Garstang’s Copper-hole, I laid hold o’ the preacher and lifted him up over my head and held him into the darkest on it. “Now, lad,” I says “it’s to be one or t’other on us—thee or me—for ‘Liza Roantree. Why, isn’t thee afraid for thysen?” I says, for he were still i’ my arms as a sack. “Nay; I’m but afraid for thee, my poor lad, as knows naught,” says he. I set him down on th’ edge, an’ th’ beck run stiller, an’ there was no more buzzin’ in my head like when th’ bee come through th’ window o’ Jesse’s house. “What dost tha mean?” says I.

“You're a coward and a fool,” I said to myself, and I wrestled in my mind against him until, when we got to Garstang’s Copper-hole, I grabbed the preacher and lifted him up over my head, holding him into the darkness. “Now, kid,” I said, “it has to be one or the other of us—either you or me—for ‘Liza Roantree. Aren’t you afraid for yourself?” I asked, since he was still in my arms like a sack. “No; I’m only worried for you, my poor kid, who knows nothing,” he said. I set him down on the edge, and the stream ran smoother, and there was no more buzzing in my head like when the bee came through the window of Jesse’s house. “What do you mean?” I asked.

‘“I’ve often thought as thou ought to know,” says he, “but ‘twas hard to tell thee. ‘Liza Roantree’s for neither on us, nor for nobody o’ this earth. Dr. Warbottom says—and he knows her, and her mother before her—that she is in a decline, and she cannot live six months longer. He’s known it for many a day. Steady, John! Steady!” says he. And that weak little man pulled me further back and set me again’ him, and talked it all over quiet and still, me turnin’ a bunch o’ candles in my hand, and counting them ower and ower again as I listened. A deal on it were th’ regular preachin’ talk, but there were a vast lot as made me begin to think as he were more of a man than I’d ever given him credit for, till I were cut as deep for him as I were for mysen.

“‘I’ve often thought you should know,” he says, “but it was hard to tell you. ‘Liza Roantree is for neither of us, nor for anyone on this earth. Dr. Warbottom says—and he knows her and her mother before her—that she is in decline, and she can’t live six months longer. He’s known it for many days. Steady, John! Steady!” says he. And that weak little man pulled me further back and set me against him, and we talked it all over quietly, me turning a bunch of candles in my hand, counting them over and over again as I listened. A lot of it was the usual preaching talk, but there was a lot that made me start to think he was more of a man than I’d ever given him credit for, until I felt just as deeply for him as I did for myself.

‘Six candles we had, and we crawled and climbed all that day while they lasted, and I said to mysen, “‘Liza Roantree hasn’t six months to live.” And when we came into th’ daylight again we were like dead men to look at, an’ Blast come behind us without so much as waggin’ his tail. When I saw ‘Liza again she looked at me a minute and says, “Who’s telled tha? For I see tha knows.” And she tried to smile as she kissed me, and I fair broke down.

‘We had six candles, and we crawled and climbed all day long while they lasted. I thought to myself, “’Liza Roantree doesn’t have six months to live.” When we finally got back into the daylight, we looked like dead people, and Blast followed us without even wagging his tail. When I saw ’Liza again, she looked at me for a moment and said, “Who told you? Because I can see you know.” She tried to smile as she kissed me, and I completely fell apart.

‘Yo’ see, I was a young chap i’ them days, and had seen naught o’ life, let alone death, as is allus a-waitin’. She telled me as Dr. Warbottom said as Greenhow air was too keen, and they were goin’ to Bradford, to Jesse’s brother David, as worked i’ a mill, and I mun hold up like a man and a Christian, and she’d pray for me. Well, and they went away, and the preacher that same back end o’ th’ year were appointed to another circuit, as they call it, and I were left alone on Greenhow Hill.

You see, I was a young guy back then, and I hadn't experienced much of life, let alone death, which is always waiting. She told me that Dr. Warbottom said the air in Greenhow was too harsh, and they were going to Bradford, to Jesse's brother David, who worked in a mill. I had to stay strong like a man and a Christian, and she would pray for me. Well, they left, and that same fall, the preacher was assigned to another circuit, as they call it, and I was left alone on Greenhow Hill.

‘I tried, and I tried hard, to stick to th’ chapel, but ‘tweren’t th’ same thing at after. I hadn’t ‘Liza’s voice to follow i’ th’ singin’, nor her eyes a-shinin’ acrost their heads. And i’ th’ class-meetings they said as I mun have some experiences to tell, and I hadn’t a word to say for mysen.

‘I tried, and I really put in the effort, to stay at the chapel, but it just wasn’t the same afterward. I didn’t have ‘Liza’s voice to follow in the singing, nor her eyes shining over their heads. And in the class meetings, they said I must have some experiences to share, but I didn’t have a single word to say for myself.

‘Blast and me moped a good deal, and happen we didn’t behave ourselves over well, for they dropped us and wondered however they’d come to take us up. I can’t tell how we got through th’ time, while i’ th’ winter I gave up my job and went to Bradford. Old Jesse were at th’ door o’ th’ house, in a long street o’ little houses. He’d been sendin’ th’ children ‘way as were clatterin’ their clogs in th’ causeway, for she were asleep.

‘Blast and I sulked quite a bit, and we definitely didn’t behave well, so they dropped us and wondered how they ended up picking us up in the first place. I can’t recall how we got through the time, but during the winter I quit my job and went to Bradford. Old Jesse was at the door of the house, on a long street of small houses. He had been sending the children away who were clattering their clogs on the pavement, because she was asleep.

‘“Is it thee?” he says; “but you’re not to see her. I’ll none have her wakened for a nowt like thee. She’s goin’ fast, and she mun go in peace. Thou’lt never be good for naught i’ th’ world, and as long as thou lives thou’ll never play the big fiddle. Get away, lad, get away!” So he shut the door softly i’ my face.

“Is that you?” he says; “but you can’t see her. I won’t have her disturbed by someone like you. She’s going fast, and she needs to go in peace. You’ll never be good for anything in this world, and as long as you live, you’ll never play the lead role. Get out of here, kid, get out of here!” Then he closed the door gently in my face.

‘Nobody never made Jesse my master, but it seemed to me he was about right, and I went away into the town and knocked up against a recruiting sergeant. The old tales o’ th’ chapel folk came buzzin’ into my head. I was to get away, and this were th’ regular road for the likes o’ me. I ‘listed there and then, took th’ Widow’s shillin’, and had a bunch o’ ribbons pinned i’ my hat.

‘Nobody ever made Jesse my boss, but it felt like he was right, so I headed into town and ran into a recruiting sergeant. The old stories from the chapel folks started buzzing in my head. I was supposed to get out, and this was the usual way for someone like me. I signed up right then and there, took the Widow’s shilling, and got a bunch of ribbons pinned in my hat.

‘But next day I found my way to David Roantree’s door, and Jesse came to open it. Says he, “Thou’s come back again wi’ th’ devil’s colours flyin’—thy true colours, as I always telled thee.”

‘But the next day, I made my way to David Roantree’s door, and Jesse answered. He said, “You’ve come back again with the devil’s colors flying—your true colors, just like I always told you.”’

‘But I begged and prayed of him to let me see her nobbut to say good-bye, till a woman calls down th’ stairway, “She says John Learoyd’s to come up.” Th’ old man shifts aside in a flash, and lays his hand on my arm, quite gentle like. “But thou’lt be quiet, John,” says he, “for she’s rare and weak. Thou was allus a good lad.”

‘But I begged and prayed him to let me see her just to say goodbye, until a woman calls down the stairway, “She says John Learoyd can come up.” The old man moves aside quickly and places his hand on my arm, quite gently. “But you’ll be quiet, John,” he says, “because she’s really fragile. You’ve always been a good lad.”

‘Her eyes were all alive wi’ light, and her hair was thick on the pillow round her, but her cheeks were thin—thin to frighten a man that’s strong. “Nay, father, yo mayn’t say th’ devil’s colours. Them ribbons is pretty.” An’ she held out her hands for th’ hat, an’ she put all straight as a woman will wi’ ribbons. “Nay, but what they’re pretty,” she says. “Eh, but I’d ha’ liked to see thee i’ thy red coat, John, for thou was allus my own lad—my very own lad, and none else.”

‘Her eyes were bright with light, and her hair was thick on the pillow around her, but her cheeks were so thin—they could scare a strong man. “No, father, you can't say those are devil's colors. Those ribbons are pretty.” And she reached out her hands for the hat, and she organized everything neatly like a woman does with ribbons. “No, but they are pretty,” she said. “Oh, but I would have liked to see you in your red coat, John, because you were always my own boy—my very own boy, and no one else.”

‘She lifted up her arms, and they come round my neck i’ a gentle grip, and they slacked away, and she seemed fainting. “Now yo’ mun get away, lad,” says Jesse, and I picked up my hat and I came downstairs.

‘She lifted her arms, and they wrapped around my neck in a gentle embrace, then loosened, as she appeared to faint. “Now you need to leave, kid,” says Jesse, and I grabbed my hat and went downstairs.

‘Th’ recruiting sergeant were waitin’ for me at th’ corner public-house. “Yo’ve seen your sweetheart?” says he. “Yes, I’ve seen her,” says I. “Well, we’ll have a quart now, and you’ll do your best to forget her,” says he, bein’ one o’ them smart, bustlin’ chaps. “Ay, sergeant,” says I. “Forget her.” And I’ve been forgettin’ her ever since.’

‘The recruiting sergeant was waiting for me at the corner pub. “You’ve seen your sweetheart?” he says. “Yes, I’ve seen her,” I reply. “Well, we’ll have a pint now, and you’ll do your best to forget her,” he says, being one of those smart, bustling guys. “Yeah, sergeant,” I say. “Forget her.” And I’ve been forgetting her ever since.’

He threw away the wilted clump of white violets as he spoke. Ortheris suddenly rose to his knees, his rifle at his shoulder, and peered across the valley in the clear afternoon light. His chin cuddled the stock, and there was a twitching of the muscles of the right cheek as he sighted; Private Stanley Ortheris was engaged on his business. A speck of white crawled up the watercourse.

He tossed aside the withered bunch of white violets as he spoke. Ortheris suddenly knelt down, his rifle at his shoulder, and scanned the valley in the bright afternoon light. His chin rested on the stock, and his right cheek twitched as he aimed; Private Stanley Ortheris was focused on his task. A little white speck moved up the watercourse.

‘See that beggar? . . . Got ‘im.’

‘See that beggar? . . . Got him.’

Seven hundred yards away, and a full two hundred down the hillside, the deserter of the Aurangabadis pitched forward, rolled down a red rock, and lay very still, with his face in a clump of blue gentians, while a big raven flapped out of the pine wood to make investigation.

Seven hundred yards away, and two hundred down the hill, the deserter from the Aurangabadis fell forward, rolled down a red rock, and lay still with his face in a patch of blue gentians, while a large raven flew out of the pine trees to check it out.

‘That’s a clean shot, little man,’ said Mulvaney.

‘That’s a clean shot, kid,’ said Mulvaney.

Learoyd thoughtfully watched the smoke clear away.

Learoyd carefully watched the smoke drift away.

‘Happen there was a lass tewed up wi’ him, too,’ said he.

‘Maybe there was a girl involved with him, too,’ he said.

Ortheris did not reply. He was staring across the valley, with the smile of the artist who looks on the completed work.

Ortheris didn’t respond. He was gazing across the valley, wearing the smile of an artist admiring his finished masterpiece.





THE MAN WHO WAS

 The Earth gave up her dead that tide,
      Into our camp he came,
 And said his say, and went his way,
      And left our hearts aflame.

 Keep tally—on the gun-butt score
      The vengeance we must take,
 When God shall bring full reckoning,
      For our dead comrade’s sake.
                        BALLAD.
The Earth released her dead with the tide,  
      Into our camp he arrived,  
And spoke his piece, then walked away,  
      And left our hearts on fire.  

Keep track—on the gun butt, mark  
      The revenge we need to take,  
When God will hold us accountable,  
      For our fallen comrade’s sake.  
                        BALLAD.

Let it be clearly understood that the Russian is a delightful person till he tucks in his shirt. As an Oriental he is charming. It is only when he insists upon being treated as the most easterly of western peoples instead of the most westerly of easterns that he becomes a racial anomaly extremely difficult to handle. The host never knows which side of his nature is going to turn up next.

Let it be clear that the Russian is a charming person until he tucks in his shirt. As an Oriental, he is delightful. It's only when he insists on being treated as the farthest eastern of western people instead of the farthest western of eastern people that he becomes a complex racial anomaly that's really hard to deal with. The host never knows which side of his personality will show up next.

Dirkovitch was a Russian—a Russian of the Russians—who appeared to get his bread by serving the Czar as an officer in a Cossack regiment, and corresponding for a Russian newspaper with a name that was never twice alike. He was a handsome young Oriental, fond of wandering through unexplored portions of the earth, and he arrived in India from nowhere in particular. At least no living man could ascertain whether it was by way of Balkh, Badakshan, Chitral, Beluchistan, or Nepaul, or anywhere else. The Indian Government, being in an unusually affable mood, gave orders that he was to be civilly treated and shown everything that was to be seen. So he drifted, talking bad English and worse French, from one city to another, till he foregathered with Her Majesty’s White Hussars in the city of Peshawur, which stands at the mouth of that narrow swordcut in the hills that men call the Khyber Pass. He was undoubtedly an officer, and he was decorated after the manner of the Russians with little enamelled crosses, and he could talk, and (though this has nothing to do with his merits) he had been given up as a hopeless task, or cask, by the Black Tyrone, who individually and collectively, with hot whisky and honey, mulled brandy, and mixed spirits of every kind, had striven in all hospitality to make him drunk. And when the Black Tyrone, who are exclusively Irish, fail to disturb the peace of head of a foreigner—that foreigner is certain to be a superior man.

Dirkovitch was a Russian—truly Russian—who seemed to make a living by serving the Czar as an officer in a Cossack regiment and writing for a Russian newspaper with a name that was never the same twice. He was a good-looking young man from an exotic background, who loved exploring uncharted parts of the world, and he arrived in India from nowhere in particular. At least, no one could tell if he came through Balkh, Badakshan, Chitral, Beluchistan, Nepaul, or anywhere else. The Indian Government, feeling unusually friendly, ordered that he be treated kindly and shown all the sights. So, he wandered from city to city, speaking poor English and even worse French, until he met up with Her Majesty’s White Hussars in Peshawar, a city at the entrance of the narrow gap in the hills known as the Khyber Pass. He was clearly an officer, decorated in the typical Russian style with small enamelled crosses, and he could speak, and (though this is irrelevant to his character) he had been written off as a lost cause by the Black Tyrone, who, both individually and together, with hot whisky and honey, mulled brandy, and assorted spirits, had tried their best in hospitality to get him drunk. And when the Black Tyrone, who are entirely Irish, fail to disturb the composure of a foreigner, that foreigner is sure to be someone exceptional.

The White Hussars were as conscientious in choosing their wine as in charging the enemy. All that they possessed, including some wondrous brandy, was placed at the absolute disposition of Dirkovitch, and he enjoyed himself hugely—even more than among the Black Tyrones.

The White Hussars were just as careful when picking their wine as they were when attacking the enemy. Everything they had, including some amazing brandy, was completely at Dirkovitch's disposal, and he had a great time—even more than he did with the Black Tyrones.

But he remained distressingly European through it all. The White Hussars were ‘My dear true friends,’ ‘Fellow-soldiers glorious,’ and ‘Brothers inseparable.’ He would unburden himself by the hour on the glorious future that awaited the combined arms of England and Russia when their hearts and their territories should run side by side and the great mission of civilising Asia should begin. That was unsatisfactory, because Asia is not going to be civilised after the methods of the West. There is too much Asia and she is too old. You cannot reform a lady of many lovers, and Asia has been insatiable in her flirtations aforetime. She will never attend Sunday-school or learn to vote save with swords for tickets.

But he still had a frustratingly European attitude through it all. The White Hussars were ‘My dear true friends,’ ‘Glorious fellow soldiers,’ and ‘Inseparable brothers.’ He would go on for hours about the bright future that awaited the combined forces of England and Russia when their hearts and lands ran side by side and the great mission of civilizing Asia began. That was unsatisfactory because Asia isn’t going to be civilized by Western methods. There’s too much of Asia, and it’s too ancient. You can’t reform a woman with many lovers, and Asia has been endlessly flirty in the past. She will never go to Sunday school or learn to vote except with swords as tickets.

Dirkovitch knew this as well as any one else, but it suited him to talk special-correspondently and to make himself as genial as he could. Now and then he volunteered a little, a very little, information about his own sotnia of Cossacks, left apparently to look after themselves somewhere at the back of beyond. He had done rough work in Central Asia, and had seen rather more help-yourself fighting than most men of his years. But he was careful never to betray his superiority, and more than careful to praise on all occasions the appearance, drill, uniform, and organisation of Her Majesty’s White Hussars. And indeed they were a regiment to be admired. When Lady Durgan, widow of the late Sir John Durgan, arrived in their station, and after a short time had been proposed to by every single man at mess, she put the public sentiment very neatly when she explained that they were all so nice that unless she could marry them all, including the colonel and some majors already married, she was not going to content herself with one hussar. Wherefore she wedded a little man in a rifle regiment, being by nature contradictious; and the White Hussars were going to wear crape on their arms, but compromised by attending the wedding in full force, and lining the aisle with unutterable reproach. She had jilted them all—from Basset-Holmer the senior captain to little Mildred the junior subaltern, who could have given her four thousand a year and a title.

Dirkovitch was aware of this just like everyone else, but he found it convenient to act all chatty and try to be as friendly as possible. Occasionally, he shared a tiny bit of information about his own group of Cossacks, who were apparently off somewhere in the middle of nowhere. He had done some tough work in Central Asia and had experienced more hands-on fighting than most people his age. However, he made sure never to show that he was better than anyone and was very careful to always praise the looks, training, uniforms, and organization of Her Majesty’s White Hussars. They truly were a regiment worth admiring. When Lady Durgan, the widow of the late Sir John Durgan, arrived at their station and was proposed to by every single man at mess within a short time, she summed up the public sentiment perfectly when she explained that they were all so great that unless she could marry them all, including the colonel and some already married majors, she wouldn’t settle for just one hussar. So, she ended up marrying a little guy from a rifle regiment, being naturally contrarian; and the White Hussars were set to wear black armbands in mourning but settled for showing up in full force at the wedding, lining the aisle with silent disdain. She had rejected them all—from Basset-Holmer, the senior captain, to little Mildred, the junior subaltern, who could have offered her four thousand a year and a title.

The only persons who did not share the general regard for the White Hussars were a few thousand gentlemen of Jewish extraction who lived across the border, and answered to the name of Pathan. They had once met the regiment officially and for something less than twenty minutes, but the interview, which was complicated with many casualties, had filled them with prejudice. They even called the White Hussars children of the devil and sons of persons whom it would be perfectly impossible to meet in decent society. Yet they were not above making their aversion fill their money-belts. The regiment possessed carbines—beautiful Martini-Henri carbines that would lob a bullet into an enemy’s camp at one thousand yards, and were even handier than the long rifle. Therefore they were coveted all along the border, and since demand inevitably breeds supply, they were supplied at the risk of life and limb for exactly their weight in coined silver—seven and one-half pounds weight of rupees, or sixteen pounds sterling reckoning the rupee at par. They were stolen at night by snaky-haired thieves who crawled on their stomachs under the nose of the sentries; they disappeared mysteriously from locked arm-racks, and in the hot weather, when all the barrack doors and windows were open, they vanished like puffs of their own smoke. The border people desired them for family vendettas and contingencies. But in the long cold nights of the northern Indian winter they were stolen most extensively. The traffic of murder was liveliest among the hills at that season, and prices ruled high. The regimental guards were first doubled and then trebled. A trooper does not much care if he loses a weapon—Government must make it good—but he deeply resents the loss of his sleep. The regiment grew very angry, and one rifle-thief bears the visible marks of their anger upon him to this hour. That incident stopped the burglaries for a time, and the guards were reduced accordingly, and the regiment devoted itself to polo with unexpected results; for it beat by two goals to one that very terrible polo corps the Lushkar Light Horse, though the latter had four ponies apiece for a short hour’s fight, as well as a native officer who played like a lambent flame across the ground.

The only people who didn't share the general admiration for the White Hussars were a few thousand Jewish gentlemen living across the border, known as Pathans. They had officially met the regiment once for less than twenty minutes, but that encounter, which involved significant casualties, left them with a strong prejudice. They even referred to the White Hussars as children of the devil and the offspring of people who would never fit into decent society. Yet, they weren't above using their dislike to line their pockets. The regiment had carbines—beautiful Martini-Henri carbines that could hit a target in an enemy camp from a thousand yards away and were even easier to handle than long rifles. Because of this, they were highly sought after along the border. As demand naturally creates supply, these carbines were provided at the risk of life for their weight in silver—seven and a half pounds of rupees, or sixteen pounds sterling based on the rupee being valued at par. They were taken at night by sneaky thieves who slithered on their stomachs right under the noses of the guards; they mysteriously vanished from locked arm-racks, and in the hot weather when all the barrack doors and windows were open, they disappeared like smoke. The people at the border wanted them for family feuds and emergencies. However, during the long cold nights of the northern Indian winter, they were stolen the most. The murder trade was busiest in the hills at that time, and prices were high. The regiment doubled and then tripled the guards. A soldier doesn't mind losing a weapon—after all, the government has to replace it—but he truly hates losing sleep. The regiment got very angry, and one rifle thief still bears the marks of their anger to this day. That incident temporarily stopped the thefts, allowing the guards to be reduced, and the regiment turned its focus to polo with surprising results; they beat the feared Lushkar Light Horse polo team by two goals to one, even though the latter had four ponies each for a short match and a native officer who moved across the field like a bright flame.

They gave a dinner to celebrate the event. The Lushkar team came, and Dirkovitch came, in the fullest full uniform of a Cossack officer, which is as full as a dressing-gown, and was introduced to the Lushkars, and opened his eyes as he regarded. They were lighter men than the Hussars, and they carried themselves with the swing that is the peculiar right of the Punjab Frontier Force and all Irregular Horse. Like everything else in the Service it has to be learnt, but, unlike many things, it is never forgotten, and remains on the body till death.

They hosted a dinner to celebrate the event. The Lushkar team showed up, and Dirkovitch arrived in the complete uniform of a Cossack officer, which looks as comfortable as a dressing gown. He was introduced to the Lushkars and watched them with wide eyes. They were lighter than the Hussars and carried themselves with the unique swagger of the Punjab Frontier Force and all Irregular Horse. Like everything else in the Service, it has to be learned, but, unlike many things, it is never forgotten and stays with you for life.

The great beam-roofed mess-room of the White Hussars was a sight to be remembered. All the mess plate was out on the long table—the same table that had served up the bodies of five officers after a forgotten fight long and long ago—the dingy, battered standards faced the door of entrance, clumps of winter-roses lay between the silver candlesticks, and the portraits of eminent officers deceased looked down on their successors from between the heads of sambhur, nilghai, markhor, and, pride of all the mess, two grinning snow-leopards that had cost Basset-Holmer four months’ leave that he might have spent in England, instead of on the road to Thibet and the daily risk of his life by ledge, snow-slide, and grassy slope.

The spacious, beam-roofed dining hall of the White Hussars was truly memorable. The long table was set with all the mess plates—the same one that had once served the bodies of five officers after a forgotten battle long ago—the worn and faded standards faced the entrance door, clusters of winter roses were placed between the silver candlesticks, and the portraits of distinguished deceased officers looked down on their successors from among the heads of sambhur, nilghai, markhor, and, the pride of the mess, two grinning snow leopards that had cost Basset-Holmer four months of leave he could have spent in England instead of traveling to Tibet, facing daily risks from ledges, snow slides, and grassy slopes.

The servants in spotless white muslin and the crest of their regiments on the brow of their turbans waited behind their masters, who were clad in the scarlet and gold of the White Hussars, and the cream and silver of the Lushkar Light Horse. Dirkovitch’s dull green uniform was the only dark spot at the board, but his big onyx eyes made up for it. He was fraternising effusively with the captain of the Lushkar team, who was wondering how many of Dirkovitch’s Cossacks his own dark wiry down-countrymen could account for in a fair charge. But one does not speak of these things openly.

The servants in crisp white muslin, with the crest of their regiments on their turbans, waited behind their masters, who were dressed in the striking scarlet and gold of the White Hussars and the cream and silver of the Lushkar Light Horse. Dirkovitch’s dull green uniform was the only dark spot at the table, but his sharp onyx eyes made up for it. He was chatting enthusiastically with the captain of the Lushkar team, who was wondering how many of Dirkovitch’s Cossacks his own lean, wiry men from the countryside could take on in a fair fight. But such things aren’t talked about openly.

The talk rose higher and higher, and the regimental band played between the courses, as is the immemorial custom, till all tongues ceased for a moment with the removal of the dinner-slips and the first toast of obligation, when an officer rising said, ‘Mr. Vice, the Queen,’ and little Mildred from the bottom of the table answered, ‘The Queen, God bless her,’ and the big spurs clanked as the big men heaved themselves up and drank the Queen upon whose pay they were falsely supposed to settle their mess-bills. That Sacrament of the Mess never grows old, and never ceases to bring a lump into the throat of the listener wherever he be by sea or by land. Dirkovitch rose with his ‘brothers glorious,’ but he could not understand. No one but an officer can tell what the toast means; and the bulk have more sentiment than comprehension. Immediately after the little silence that follows on the ceremony there entered the native officer who had played for the Lushkar team. He could not, of course, eat with the mess, but he came in at dessert, all six feet of him, with the blue and silver turban atop, and the big black boots below. The mess rose joyously as he thrust forward the hilt of his sabre in token of fealty for the colonel of the White Hussars to touch, and dropped into a vacant chair amid shouts of: ‘Rung ho, Hira Singh!’ (which being translated means ‘Go in and win’). ‘Did I whack you over the knee, old man?’ ‘Ressaidar Sahib, what the devil made you play that kicking pig of a pony in the last ten minutes?’ ‘Shabash, Ressaidar Sahib!’ Then the voice of the colonel, ‘The health of Ressaidar Hira Singh!’

The conversation grew louder and louder, while the regimental band played between courses, as has always been the custom, until everyone quieted for a moment with the removal of the dinner plates and the first obligatory toast. An officer stood and said, “Mr. Vice, the Queen,” to which little Mildred at the end of the table replied, “The Queen, God bless her.” The sound of spurs clanked as the big men rose up and toasted the Queen, who they were mistakenly thought to be paying their dining bills. That Mess toast never gets old and always brings a lump to the throat of anyone hearing it, whether by sea or by land. Dirkovitch stood with his “glorious brothers,” but he didn’t understand. Only an officer can grasp what the toast truly means; most have more emotion than understanding. Right after the brief silence that follows the ceremony, the native officer who had played for the Lushkar team walked in. He couldn’t, of course, eat with the mess, but he arrived for dessert, all six feet of him, with a blue and silver turban on his head and big black boots on his feet. The mess stood up cheerfully as he presented the hilt of his saber as a sign of loyalty for the colonel of the White Hussars to touch, then dropped into a free chair amidst cheers of, “Rung ho, Hira Singh!” (which means “Go in and win”). “Did I hit you over the knee, old man?” “Ressaidar Sahib, what on earth made you play that awful pony in the last ten minutes?” “Shabash, Ressaidar Sahib!” Then the colonel’s voice rang out, “To the health of Ressaidar Hira Singh!”

After the shouting had died away Hira Singh rose to reply, for he was the cadet of a royal house, the son of a king’s son, and knew what was due on these occasions. Thus he spoke in the vernacular:—‘Colonel Sahib and officers of this regiment. Much honour have you done me. This will I remember. We came down from afar to play you. But we were beaten.’ (‘No fault of yours, Ressaidar Sahib. Played on our own ground y’know. Your ponies were cramped from the railway. Don’t apologise!’) ‘Therefore perhaps we will come again if it be so ordained.’ (‘Hear! Hear! Hear, indeed! Bravo! Hsh!’) ‘Then we will play you afresh’ (‘Happy to meet you.’) ‘till there are left no feet upon our ponies. Thus far for sport.’ He dropped one hand on his sword-hilt and his eye wandered to Dirkovitch lolling back in his chair. ‘But if by the will of God there arises any other game which is not the polo game, then be assured, Colonel Sahib and officers, that we will play it out side by side, though THEY,’ again his eye sought Dirkovitch, ‘though THEY I say have fifty ponies to our one horse.’ And with a deep-mouthed Rung ho! that sounded like a musket-butt on flagstones he sat down amid leaping glasses.

After the shouting had calmed down, Hira Singh stood up to respond, as he was a cadet from a royal family, the son of a prince, and knew the proper etiquette for these occasions. He addressed the crowd in the local language: "Colonel Sahib and officers of this regiment, you have honored me greatly, and I will remember this. We came from far away to play against you, but we lost." (“Not your fault, Ressaidar Sahib. We played on our own turf, you know. Your ponies were cramped from the train journey. No need to apologize!”) "So perhaps we will come back if it is meant to be." (“Hear! Hear! Indeed! Bravo! Hsh!”) "Then we will play again" (“Happy to meet you.”) "until there are no feet left on our ponies. That's enough for sports." He rested one hand on his sword-hilt and glanced at Dirkovitch lounging in his chair. "But if by God's will another game comes up that isn't polo, then be assured, Colonel Sahib and officers, that we will play it together, even if THEY," he looked at Dirkovitch, "even if THEY have fifty ponies to our one horse." With a loud "Rung ho!" that echoed like a musket butt on flagstones, he sat down amidst the cheers and clinking of glasses.

Dirkovitch, who had devoted himself steadily to the brandy—the terrible brandy aforementioned—did not understand, nor did the expurgated translations offered to him at all convey the point. Decidedly Hira Singh’s was the speech of the evening, and the clamour might have continued to the dawn had it not been broken by the noise of a shot without that sent every man feeling at his defenceless left side. Then there was a scuffle and a yell of pain.

Dirkovitch, who had been steadily focusing on the brandy—the awful brandy mentioned earlier—didn't get it, nor did the edited translations provided to him make the point at all. Definitely, Hira Singh’s was the standout speech of the evening, and the uproar could have gone on until dawn if it hadn't been interrupted by the sound of a shot outside that made every man instinctively touch his unprotected left side. Then there was a struggle and a cry of pain.

‘Carbine-stealing again!’ said the adjutant, calmly sinking back in his chair. ‘This comes of reducing the guards. I hope the sentries have killed him.’

‘Carbine-stealing again!’ said the adjutant, calmly settling back in his chair. ‘This is what happens when we cut down on the guards. I hope the sentries have taken him out.’

The feet of armed men pounded on the verandah flags, and it was as though something was being dragged.

The feet of armed men thudded on the porch tiles, and it felt like something was being dragged.

‘Why don’t they put him in the cells till the morning?’ said the colonel testily. ‘See if they’ve damaged him, sergeant.’

‘Why don’t they lock him up in the cells until morning?’ the colonel said irritably. ‘Check to see if they’ve harmed him, sergeant.’

The mess sergeant fled out into the darkness and returned with two troopers and a corporal, all very much perplexed.

The mess sergeant dashed out into the darkness and came back with two troopers and a corporal, all looking very confused.

‘Caught a man stealin’ carbines, sir,’ said the corporal. ‘Leastways ‘e was crawlin’ towards the barricks, sir, past the main road sentries, an’ the sentry ‘e sez, sir—’

‘Caught a man stealing carbines, sir,’ said the corporal. ‘At least he was crawling towards the barracks, sir, past the main road sentries, and the sentry he says, sir—’

The limp heap of rags upheld by the three men groaned. Never was seen so destitute and demoralised an Afghan. He was turbanless, shoeless, caked with dirt, and all but dead with rough handling. Hira Singh started slightly at the sound of the man’s pain. Dirkovitch took another glass of brandy.

The limp pile of rags being held up by the three men groaned. Never had such a destitute and demoralized Afghan been seen. He was without a turban, without shoes, covered in dirt, and nearly dead from rough treatment. Hira Singh flinched a little at the sound of the man’s suffering. Dirkovitch took another glass of brandy.

‘WHAT does the sentry say?’ said the colonel.

‘What does the guard say?’ asked the colonel.

‘Sez ‘e speaks English, sir,’ said the corporal.

‘He says he speaks English, sir,’ said the corporal.

‘So you brought him into mess instead of handing him over to the sergeant! If he spoke all the Tongues of the Pentecost you’ve no business—’

‘So you brought him into the mess instead of turning him over to the sergeant! If he could speak all the languages from Pentecost, that’s not your concern—’

Again the bundle groaned and muttered. Little Mildred had risen from his place to inspect. He jumped back as though he had been shot.

Again, the bundle groaned and grumbled. Little Mildred had gotten up from his spot to take a look. He jumped back as if he had been shot.

‘Perhaps it would be better, sir, to send the men away,’ said he to the colonel, for he was a much privileged subaltern. He put his arms round the ragbound horror as he spoke, and dropped him into a chair. It may not have been explained that the littleness of Mildred lay in his being six feet four and big in proportion. The corporal seeing that an officer was disposed to look after the capture, and that the colonel’s eye was beginning to blaze, promptly removed himself and his men. The mess was left alone with the carbine-thief, who laid his head on the table and wept bitterly, hopelessly, and inconsolably, as little children weep.

“Maybe it would be better, sir, to send the men away,” he said to the colonel, since he was a fairly privileged subordinate. He wrapped his arms around the injured man as he spoke and helped him into a chair. It might not have been clear that Mildred’s smallness came from his towering height of six feet four, which made him look even bigger. The corporal, noticing that an officer was willing to take charge of the situation and seeing the anger growing in the colonel’s eyes, quickly took himself and his men away. The mess was left alone with the carbine-thief, who laid his head on the table and cried bitterly, hopelessly, and inconsolably, just like little children do.

Hira Singh leapt to his feet. ‘Colonel Sahib,’ said he, ‘that man is no Afghan, for they weep Ai! Ai! Nor is he of Hindustan, for they weep Oh! Ho! He weeps after the fashion of the white men, who say Ow! Ow!’

Hira Singh jumped to his feet. ‘Colonel, that guy isn’t an Afghan because they cry Ai! Ai! Nor is he from Hindustan because they cry Oh! Ho! He cries like the white men, who say Ow! Ow!’

‘Now where the dickens did you get that knowledge, Hira Singh?’ said the captain of the Lushkar team.

‘Now where on earth did you get that knowledge, Hira Singh?’ said the captain of the Lushkar team.

‘Hear him!’ said Hira Singh simply, pointing at the crumpled figure that wept as though it would never cease.

‘Listen to him!’ said Hira Singh simply, pointing at the crumpled figure that cried as if it would never stop.

‘He said, “My God!”’ said little Mildred. ‘I heard him say it.’

‘He said, “Oh my God!”’ said little Mildred. ‘I heard him say it.’

The colonel and the mess-room looked at the man in silence. It is a horrible thing to hear a man cry. A woman can sob from the top of her palate, or her lips, or anywhere else, but a man must cry from his diaphragm, and it rends him to pieces.

The colonel and the mess room stared at the man in silence. It’s a terrible thing to hear a man cry. A woman can sob from her throat, her lips, or anywhere else, but a man has to cry from his core, and it tears him apart.

‘Poor devil!’ said the colonel, coughing tremendously. ‘We ought to send him to hospital. He’s been man-handled.’

‘Poor guy!’ said the colonel, coughing hard. ‘We should get him to the hospital. He’s been roughhoused.’

Now the adjutant loved his carbines. They were to him as his grandchildren, the men standing in the first place. He grunted rebelliously: ‘I can understand an Afghan stealing, because he’s built that way. But I can’t understand his crying. That makes it worse.’

Now the adjutant loved his carbines. They were to him like his grandchildren, the men standing in the first place. He grunted defiantly: ‘I can understand an Afghan stealing because that’s just how he is. But I can’t understand him crying. That makes it worse.’

The brandy must have affected Dirkovitch, for he lay back in his chair and stared at the ceiling. There was nothing special in the ceiling beyond a shadow as of a huge black coffin. Owing to some peculiarity in the construction of the mess-room this shadow was always thrown when the candles were lighted. It never disturbed the digestion of the White Hussars. They were in fact rather proud of it.

The brandy must have gotten to Dirkovitch, because he leaned back in his chair and stared at the ceiling. There was nothing unusual up there, just a shadow that looked like a giant black coffin. Due to some odd feature in the design of the mess room, this shadow always appeared when the candles were lit. It never bothered the White Hussars' appetite. In fact, they were kind of proud of it.

‘Is he going to cry all night?’ said the colonel, ‘or are we supposed to sit up with little Mildred’s guest until he feels better?’

‘Is he going to cry all night?’ asked the colonel, ‘or are we supposed to stay up with little Mildred’s guest until he feels better?’

The man in the chair threw up his head and stared at the mess. ‘Oh, my God!’ he said, and every soul in the mess rose to his feet. Then the Lushkar captain did a deed for which he ought to have been given the Victoria Cross—distinguished gallantry in a fight against overwhelming curiosity. He picked up his team with his eyes as the hostess picks up the ladies at the opportune moment, and pausing only by the colonel’s chair to say, ‘This isn’t OUR affair, you know, sir,’ led them into the verandah and the gardens. Hira Singh was the last to go, and he looked at Dirkovitch. But Dirkovitch had departed into a brandy-paradise of his own. His lips moved without sound and he was studying the coffin on the ceiling.

The guy in the chair threw his head back and stared at the chaos. "Oh, my God!" he said, and everyone in the mess stood up. Then the Lushkar captain did something that deserved a Victoria Cross for showing bravery in the face of overwhelming curiosity. He scanned his team with his eyes like the hostess picks out the ladies at the right moment, and stopping only by the colonel's chair to say, "This isn’t OUR business, you know, sir," he led them out to the verandah and the gardens. Hira Singh was the last to leave, and he glanced at Dirkovitch. But Dirkovitch had slipped into his own brandy paradise. His lips moved without making a sound as he studied the coffin on the ceiling.

‘White—white all over,’ said Basset-Holmer, the adjutant. ‘What a pernicious renegade he must be! I wonder where he came from?’

‘White—white all over,’ said Basset-Holmer, the adjutant. ‘What a harmful traitor he must be! I wonder where he came from?’

The colonel shook the man gently by the arm, and ‘Who are you?’ said he.

The colonel gently shook the man by the arm and asked, "Who are you?"

There was no answer. The man stared round the mess-room and smiled in the colonel’s face. Little Mildred, who was always more of a woman than a man till ‘Boot and saddle’ was sounded, repeated the question in a voice that would have drawn confidences from a geyser. The man only smiled. Dirkovitch at the far end of the table slid gently from his chair to the floor.

There was no answer. The man looked around the mess hall and smiled at the colonel. Little Mildred, who always seemed more like a woman than a man until "Boot and saddle" was called, asked the question again in a way that could make anyone spill their secrets. The man just smiled. Dirkovitch at the far end of the table slowly slid off his chair and onto the floor.

No son of Adam in this present imperfect world can mix the Hussars’ champagne with the Hussars’ brandy by five and eight glasses of each without remembering the pit whence he was digged and descending thither. The band began to play the tune with which the White Hussars from the date of their formation have concluded all their functions. They would sooner be disbanded than abandon that tune; it is a part of their system. The man straightened himself in his chair and drummed on the table with his fingers.

No son of Adam in this imperfect world can mix the Hussars’ champagne with their brandy by five and eight glasses of each without remembering the pit from which he was dug and descending back there. The band started playing the tune that the White Hussars have concluded all their functions with since their formation. They would rather be disbanded than give up that tune; it's part of their tradition. The man straightened up in his chair and drummed his fingers on the table.

‘I don’t see why we should entertain lunatics,’ said the colonel. ‘Call a guard and send him off to the cells. We’ll look into the business in the morning. Give him a glass of wine first though.’

‘I don’t see why we should deal with crazies,’ said the colonel. ‘Call a guard and send him off to the cells. We’ll look into this in the morning. But let’s give him a glass of wine first.’

Little Mildred filled a sherry-glass with the brandy and thrust it over to the man. He drank, and the tune rose louder, and he straightened himself yet more. Then he put out his long-taloned hands to a piece of plate opposite and fingered it lovingly. There was a mystery connected with that piece of plate, in the shape of a spring which converted what was a seven-branched candlestick, three springs on each side and one in the middle, into a sort of wheel-spoke candelabrum. He found the spring, pressed it, and laughed weakly. He rose from his chair and inspected a picture on the wall, then moved on to another picture, the mess watching him without a word. When he came to the mantelpiece he shook his head and seemed distressed. A piece of plate representing a mounted hussar in full uniform caught his eye. He pointed to it, and then to the mantelpiece with inquiry in his eyes.

Little Mildred filled a sherry glass with brandy and handed it to the man. He drank, the music got louder, and he straightened up even more. Then he reached out his long fingers to a piece of plate across from him and examined it fondly. There was a mystery about that piece of plate; it had a spring that transformed what was a seven-branched candlestick—three springs on each side and one in the middle—into a kind of wheel-spoke candelabrum. He found the spring, pressed it, and laughed weakly. He got up from his chair and looked at a picture on the wall, then moved to another picture, with everyone around him watching silently. When he reached the mantelpiece, he shook his head and seemed upset. His attention was drawn to a piece of plate depicting a mounted hussar in full uniform. He pointed at it, then at the mantelpiece, a question in his eyes.

‘What is it—Oh what is it?’ said little Mildred. Then as a mother might speak to a child, ‘That is a horse. Yes, a horse.’

‘What is it—Oh what is it?’ said little Mildred. Then, as a mother might talk to her child, ‘That’s a horse. Yes, a horse.’

Very slowly came the answer in a thick, passionless guttural—‘Yes, I—have seen. But—where is THE horse?’

Very slowly, the answer came out in a thick, emotionless voice—‘Yeah, I’ve seen it. But—where is THE horse?’

You could have heard the hearts of the mess beating as the men drew back to give the stranger full room in his wanderings. There was no question of calling the guard.

You could have heard the hearts of the crowd pounding as the men stepped back to give the stranger plenty of space to roam. There was no doubt about calling the guard.

Again he spoke—very slowly, ‘Where is OUR horse?’

Again he spoke—very slowly, “Where’s our horse?”

There is but one horse in the White Hussars, and his portrait hangs outside the door of the mess-room. He is the piebald drum-horse, the king of the regimental band, that served the regiment for seven-and-thirty years, and in the end was shot for old age. Half the mess tore the thing down from its place and thrust it into the man’s hands. He placed it above the mantel-piece, it clattered on the ledge as his poor hands dropped it, and he staggered towards the bottom of the table, falling into Mildred’s chair. Then all the men spoke to one another something after this fashion, ‘The drum-horse hasn’t hung over the mantelpiece since ‘67.’ ‘How does he know?’ ‘Mildred, go and speak to him again.’ ‘Colonel, what are you going to do?’ ‘Oh, dry up, and give the poor devil a chance to pull himself together.’ ‘It isn’t possible anyhow. The man’s a lunatic.’

There's only one horse in the White Hussars, and his picture hangs outside the mess-room door. He's the piebald drum-horse, the star of the regimental band, who served for thirty-seven years and was eventually put down due to old age. Half the mess took the picture down and shoved it into the man's hands. He put it above the mantelpiece, it clattered on the ledge as his shaky hands dropped it, and he staggered towards the bottom of the table, collapsing into Mildred’s chair. Then all the men started talking to each other like this, ‘The drum-horse hasn’t been over the mantelpiece since '67.’ ‘How does he know?’ ‘Mildred, go talk to him again.’ ‘Colonel, what’s your plan?’ ‘Oh, shut up, and give the poor guy a chance to get his act together.’ ‘It’s not possible anyway. The guy’s crazy.’

Little Mildred stood at the colonel’s side talking in his ear. ‘Will you be good enough to take your seats please, gentlemen!’ he said, and the mess dropped into the chairs. Only Dirkovitch’s seat, next to little Mildred’s, was blank, and little Mildred himself had found Hira Singh’s place. The wide-eyed mess-sergeant filled the glasses in deep silence. Once more the colonel rose, but his hand shook and the port spilled on the table as he looked straight at the man in little Mildred’s chair and said hoarsely, ‘Mr. Vice, the Queen.’ There was a little pause, but the man sprung to his feet and answered without hesitation, ‘The Queen, God bless her!’ and as he emptied the thin glass he snapped the shank between his fingers.

Little Mildred stood next to the colonel, whispering in his ear. “Could you please take your seats, gentlemen?” he said, and everyone settled into their chairs. Only Dirkovitch’s spot, right next to Little Mildred’s, was empty, while Little Mildred had taken Hira Singh’s place. The wide-eyed mess sergeant quietly filled the glasses. The colonel got up again, but his hand trembled, and the port spilled on the table as he looked directly at the man in Little Mildred’s chair and said hoarsely, “Mr. Vice, the Queen.” There was a brief pause, but the man jumped to his feet and replied confidently, “The Queen, God bless her!” and as he downed the thin glass, he snapped the stem between his fingers.

Long and long ago, when the Empress of India was a young woman and there were no unclean ideals in the land, it was the custom of a few messes to drink the Queen’s toast in broken glass, to the vast delight of the mess-contractors. The custom is now dead, because there is nothing to break anything for, except now and again the word of a Government, and that has been broken already.

Long ago, when the Empress of India was young and there were no corrupt ideals in the land, a few groups had the tradition of drinking the Queen’s toast from broken glass, much to the delight of the suppliers. That tradition is now gone, as there’s nothing worth breaking anything for, except occasionally the word of the Government, which has already been broken.

‘That settles it,’ said the colonel, with a gasp. ‘He’s not a sergeant. What in the world is he?’

‘That’s it,’ said the colonel, catching his breath. ‘He’s not a sergeant. What in the world is he?’

The entire mess echoed the word, and the volley of questions would have scared any man. It was no wonder that the ragged, filthy invader could only smile and shake his head.

The whole situation echoed the word, and the barrage of questions would have terrified anyone. It's no surprise that the tattered, dirty intruder could only smile and shake his head.

From under the table, calm and smiling, rose Dirkovitch, who had been roused from healthful slumber by feet upon his body. By the side of the man he rose, and the man shrieked and grovelled. It was a horrible sight coming so swiftly upon the pride and glory of the toast that had brought the strayed wits together.

From beneath the table, calm and smiling, Dirkovitch got up, awakened from a peaceful sleep by feet on his body. He stood next to the man, who screamed and fell to the ground. It was a terrible sight, coming so suddenly after the proud and glorious toast that had brought everyone back to their senses.

Dirkovitch made no offer to raise him, but little Mildred heaved him up in an instant. It is not good that a gentleman who can answer to the Queen’s toast should lie at the feet of a subaltern of Cossacks.

Dirkovitch didn’t offer to help him up, but little Mildred lifted him in no time. It’s not right for a gentleman who can respond to the Queen’s toast to be lying at the feet of a junior officer of Cossacks.

The hasty action tore the wretch’s upper clothing nearly to the waist, and his body was seamed with dry black scars. There is only one weapon in the world that cuts: in parallel lines, and it is neither the cane nor the cat. Dirkovitch saw the marks, and the pupils of his eyes dilated. Also his face changed. He said something that sounded like Shto ve takete, and the man fawning answered, Chetyre.

The quick movement ripped the poor man’s upper clothing almost to his waist, and his body was covered in dry black scars. There’s only one thing in the world that creates those kinds of cuts in parallel lines, and it’s neither a cane nor a whip. Dirkovitch saw the scars, and his pupils dilated. His face also changed. He said something that sounded like "What do you have there?" and the man submissively replied, "Four."

‘What’s that?’ said everybody together.

"What's that?" everyone asked together.

‘His number. That is number four, you know.’ Dirkovitch spoke very thickly.

‘His number. That’s number four, you know.’ Dirkovitch spoke very heavily.

‘What has a Queen’s officer to do with a qualified number?’ said the Colonel, and an unpleasant growl ran round the table.

‘What does a Queen’s officer have to do with a qualified number?’ said the Colonel, and an uncomfortable murmur spread around the table.

‘How can I tell?’ said the affable Oriental with a sweet smile. ‘He is a—how you have it?—escape—run-a-way, from over there.’ He nodded towards the darkness of the night.

‘How can I tell?’ said the friendly Oriental with a sweet smile. ‘He is a—what do you call it?—escapee—runaway, from over there.’ He nodded towards the darkness of the night.

‘Speak to him if he’ll answer you, and speak to him gently,’ said little Mildred, settling the man in a chair. It seemed most improper to all present that Dirkovitch should sip brandy as he talked in purring, spitting Russian to the creature who answered so feebly and with such evident dread. But since Dirkovitch appeared to understand no one said a word. All breathed heavily, leaning forward, in the long gaps of the conversation. The next time that they have no engagements on hand the White Hussars intend to go to St. Petersburg in a body to learn Russian.

“Talk to him if he’s willing to respond, and speak to him softly,” said little Mildred as she settled the man into a chair. It felt completely inappropriate to everyone present that Dirkovitch was sipping brandy while he spoke in a smooth, hissing Russian to the creature who replied so weakly and with such clear fear. But since Dirkovitch seemed to understand, no one said anything. Everyone breathed heavily, leaning forward during the long pauses in the conversation. The next time they have no plans, the White Hussars intend to go to St. Petersburg as a group to learn Russian.

‘He does not know how many years ago,’ said Dirkovitch, facing the mess, ‘but he says it was very long ago in a war. I think that there was an accident. He says he was of this glorious and distinguished regiment in the war.’

‘He doesn’t know how many years ago,’ said Dirkovitch, looking at the mess, ‘but he says it was a long time ago during a war. I think there was an accident. He claims he was part of this glorious and distinguished regiment in the war.’

‘The rolls! The rolls! Holmer, get the rolls!’ said little Mildred, and the adjutant dashed off bare-headed to the orderly-room, where the muster-rolls of the regiment were kept. He returned just in time to hear Dirkovitch conclude, ‘Therefore, my dear friends, I am most sorry to say there was an accident which would have been reparable if he had apologised to that our colonel, which he had insulted.’

‘The rolls! The rolls! Holmer, get the rolls!’ said little Mildred, and the adjutant rushed off without a hat to the orderly room, where the regiment's muster rolls were kept. He came back just in time to hear Dirkovitch finish, ‘So, my dear friends, I regret to inform you that there was an accident that could have been fixed if he had apologized to our colonel, whom he had insulted.’

Then followed another growl which the colonel tried to beat down. The mess was in no mood just then to weigh insults to Russian colonels.

Then there was another growl that the colonel tried to suppress. The mess was not in the mood to consider insults directed at Russian colonels.

‘He does not remember, but I think that there was an accident, and so he was not exchanged among the prisoners, but he was sent to another place—how do you say?—the country. SO, he says, he came here. He does not know how he came. Eh? He was at Chepany’—the man caught the word, nodded, and shivered—‘at Zhigansk and Irkutsk. I cannot understand how he escaped. He says, too, that he was in the forests for many years, but how many years he has forgotten—that with many things. It was an accident; done because he did not apologise to that our colonel. Ah!’

'He doesn’t remember, but I think there was an accident, so he wasn’t swapped among the prisoners; instead, he was sent somewhere else—what do you call it?—the countryside. So he says he ended up here. He doesn’t know how he got here. Huh? He was at Chepany'—the man caught the word, nodded, and shivered—'at Zhigansk and Irkutsk. I can’t understand how he escaped. He also says he spent many years in the forests, but he’s forgotten how many years—that along with a lot of other things. It was an accident; it happened because he didn’t apologize to our colonel. Ah!'

Instead of echoing Dirkovitch’s sigh of regret, it is sad to record that the White Hussars livelily exhibited un-Christian delight and other emotions, hardly restrained by their sense of hospitality. Holmer flung the frayed and yellow regimental rolls on the table, and the men flung themselves at these.

Instead of sharing Dirkovitch’s sigh of regret, it’s unfortunate to note that the White Hussars openly showed un-Christian joy and other feelings, barely holding back because of their sense of hospitality. Holmer tossed the frayed and yellow regimental rolls onto the table, and the men eagerly dived into them.

‘Steady! Fifty-six—fifty-five—fifty-four,’ said Holmer. ‘Here we are. “Lieutenant Austin Limmason. MISSING.” That was before Sebastopol. What an infernal shame! Insulted one of their colonels, and was quietly shipped off. Thirty years of his life wiped out.’

‘Steady! Fifty-six—fifty-five—fifty-four,’ said Holmer. ‘Here we go. “Lieutenant Austin Limmason. MISSING.” That was before Sebastopol. What a terrible shame! He insulted one of their colonels and was just shipped off. Thirty years of his life gone.’

‘But he never apologised. Said he’d see him damned first,’ chorused the mess.

‘But he never apologized. Said he’d be damned first,’ the mess chimed in.

‘Poor chap! I suppose he never had the chance afterwards. How did he come here?’ said the colonel.

‘Poor guy! I guess he never got the chance after that. How did he end up here?’ said the colonel.

The dingy heap in the chair could give no answer.

The grimy pile in the chair had nothing to say.

‘Do you know who you are?’

‘Do you know who you are?’

It laughed weakly.

It chuckled softly.

‘Do you know that you are Limmason—Lieutenant Limmason of the White Hussars?’

‘Do you know that you are Limmason—Lieutenant Limmason of the White Hussars?’

Swiftly as a shot came the answer, in a slightly surprised tone, ‘Yes, I’m Limmason, of course.’ The light died out in his eyes, and the man collapsed, watching every motion of Dirkovitch with terror. A flight from Siberia may fix a few elementary facts in the mind, but it does not seem to lead to continuity of thought. The man could not explain how, like a homing pigeon, he had found his way to his own old mess again. Of what he had suffered or seen he knew nothing. He cringed before Dirkovitch as instinctively as he had pressed the spring of the candlestick, sought the picture of the drum-horse, and answered to the toast of the Queen. The rest was a blank that the dreaded Russian tongue could only in part remove. His head bowed on his breast, and he giggled and cowered alternately.

Quick as a flash came the answer, in a slightly surprised tone, "Yes, I’m Limmason, of course." The light faded from his eyes, and the man crumpled, watching every move Dirkovitch made with fear. A flight from Siberia might fix a few basic facts in the mind, but it doesn’t seem to lead to coherent thinking. The man couldn’t explain how, like a homing pigeon, he had found his way back to his old group. He had no idea what he had suffered or seen. He flinched before Dirkovitch as instinctively as he had pressed the spring of the candlestick, looked for the picture of the drum-horse, and responded to the toast of the Queen. The rest was a blank that the dreaded Russian language could only partially clear up. His head hung on his chest, and he alternated between giggling and cowering.

The devil that lived in the brandy prompted Dirkovitch at this extremely inopportune moment to make a speech. He rose, swaying slightly, gripped the table-edge, while his eyes glowed like opals, and began:

The devil that lived in the brandy urged Dirkovitch, at this really bad moment, to give a speech. He stood up, swaying a bit, held onto the edge of the table, his eyes shining like opals, and started:

‘Fellow-soldiers glorious—true friends and hospitables. It was an accident, and deplorable—most deplorable.’ Here he smiled sweetly all round the mess. ‘But you will think of this little, little thing. So little, is it not? The Czar! Posh! I slap my fingers—I snap my fingers at him. Do I believe in him? No! But in us Slav who has done nothing, HIM I believe. Seventy—how much—millions peoples that have done nothing—not one thing. Posh! Napoleon was an episode.’ He banged a hand on the table. ‘Hear you, old peoples, we have done nothing in the world—out here. All our work is to do; and it shall be done, old peoples. Get a-way!’ He waved his hand imperiously, and pointed to the man. ‘You see him. He is not good to see. He was just one little—oh, so little—accident, that no one remembered. Now he is THAT! So will you be, brother-soldiers so brave—so will you be. But you will never come back. You will all go where he is gone, or’—he pointed to the great coffin-shadow on the ceiling, and muttering, ‘Seventy millions—get a-way, you old peoples,’ fell asleep.

‘Glorious fellow soldiers—true friends and generous hosts. It was an accident, a sad one—very sad.’ He smiled sweetly around the mess. ‘But you’ll think of this tiny, tiny thing. So small, right? The Czar! Whatever! I snap my fingers at him. Do I believe in him? No! But I believe in us Slavs who have done nothing, that’s who I believe in. Seventy—how many—millions of people who have done nothing—not a single thing. Whatever! Napoleon was just a phase.’ He slammed a hand on the table. ‘Listen up, old folks, we’ve done nothing in this world—out here. All our work is ahead of us; and it will happen, old folks. Move aside!’ He waved an authoritative hand and pointed at the man. ‘You see him? He’s not easy on the eyes. He was just a tiny—oh, so tiny—accident that no one remembers. Now he is THAT! So will you be, brave brother soldiers—so will you be. But you will never come back. You’ll all go where he has gone, or’—he pointed to the large shadow of the coffin on the ceiling and muttered, ‘Seventy millions—move aside, you old folks,’ and fell asleep.

‘Sweet, and to the point,’ said little Mildred. ‘What’s the use of getting wroth? Let’s make this poor devil comfortable.’

‘Sweet and straightforward,’ said little Mildred. ‘What’s the point of getting angry? Let’s make this poor guy comfortable.’

But that was a matter suddenly and swiftly taken from the loving hands of the White Hussars. The lieutenant had returned only to go away again three days later, when the wail of the Dead March, and the tramp of the squadrons, told the wondering Station, who saw no gap in the mess-table, that an officer of the regiment had resigned his new-found commission.

But that was something suddenly and quickly taken from the loving care of the White Hussars. The lieutenant had come back only to leave again three days later, when the sound of the Dead March and the march of the squadrons informed the amazed Station, who noticed no empty seat at the mess-table, that an officer of the regiment had given up his new commission.

And Dirkovitch, bland, supple, and always genial, went away too by a night train. Little Mildred and another man saw him off, for he was the guest of the mess, and even had he smitten the colonel with the open hand, the law of that mess allowed no relaxation of hospitality.

And Dirkovitch, easygoing, flexible, and always friendly, left on a night train. Little Mildred and another man saw him off, since he was the guest of the group, and even if he had hit the colonel lightly, the rules of that group required strict hospitality.

‘Good-bye, Dirkovitch, and a pleasant journey,’ said little Mildred.

‘Goodbye, Dirkovitch, and have a great trip,’ said little Mildred.

‘Au revoir,’ said the Russian.

"Goodbye," said the Russian.

‘Indeed! But we thought you were going home?’

‘Seriously! We thought you were going home?’

‘Yes, but I will come again. My dear friends, is that road shut?’ He pointed to where the North Star burned over the Khyber Pass.

‘Yes, but I will come again. My dear friends, is that road closed?’ He pointed to where the North Star shone over the Khyber Pass.

‘By Jove! I forgot. Of course. Happy to meet you, old man, any time you like. Got everything you want? Cheroots, ice, bedding? That’s all right. Well, au revoir, Dirkovitch.’

‘By Jove! I forgot. Of course. Great to meet you, my friend, whenever you want. Do you have everything you need? Cigars, ice, bedding? That’s fine. Well, see you later, Dirkovitch.’

‘Um,’ said the other man, as the tail-lights of the train grew small. ‘Of—all—the—unmitigated—!’

‘Um,’ said the other man, as the tail lights of the train faded away. ‘Of—all—the—unbelievable—!’

Little Mildred answered nothing, but watched the North Star and hummed a selection from a recent Simla burlesque that had much delighted the White Hussars. It ran—

Little Mildred said nothing, but watched the North Star and hummed a tune from a recent Simla burlesque that had really entertained the White Hussars. It went—

     I’m sorry for Mister Bluebeard,
     I’m sorry to cause him pain;
     But a terrible spree there’s sure to be
     When he comes back again.
     I’m sorry for Mr. Bluebeard,  
     I’m sorry to cause him pain;  
     But a wild time is sure to be  
     When he comes back again.




THE HEAD OF THE DISTRICT

    There’s a convict more in the Central Jail,
       Behind the old mud wall;
     There’s a lifter less on the Border trail,
       And the Queen’s Peace over all,
                                    Dear boys
     The Queen’s Peace over all.

    For we must bear our leader’s blame,
       On us the shame will fall,
     If we lift our hand from a fettered land
       And the Queen’s Peace over all,
                                    Dear boys,
     The Queen’s Peace over all!
                      THE RUNNING OF SHINDAND.
    There’s a prisoner in the Central Jail,
       Behind the old mud wall;
     There’s a thief less on the Border trail,
       And the Queen’s Peace over all,
                                    Dear boys
     The Queen’s Peace over all.

    For we must carry our leader’s blame,
       On us the shame will fall,
     If we lift our hand from a trapped land
       And the Queen’s Peace over all,
                                    Dear boys,
     The Queen’s Peace over all!
                      THE RUNNING OF SHINDAND.

I

The Indus had risen in flood without warning. Last night it was a fordable shallow; to-night five miles of raving muddy water parted bank and caving bank, and the river was still rising under the moon. A litter borne by six bearded men, all unused to the work, stopped in the white sand that bordered the whiter plain.

The Indus had suddenly flooded. Last night it was shallow enough to cross; tonight, five miles of raging muddy water separated the banks, which were collapsing, and the river was still rising under the moon. A litter carried by six bearded men, all inexperienced, halted in the white sand that lined the brighter plain.

‘It’s God’s will,’ they said. ‘We dare not cross to-night, even in a boat. Let us light a fire and cook food. We be tired men.’

‘It’s God’s will,’ they said. ‘We shouldn’t try to cross tonight, even in a boat. Let’s light a fire and cook some food. We’re tired men.’

They looked at the litter inquiringly. Within, the Deputy Commissioner of the Kot-Kumharsen district lay dying of fever. They had brought him across country, six fighting-men of a frontier clan that he had won over to the paths of a moderate righteousness, when he had broken down at the foot of their inhospitable hills. And Tallantire, his assistant, rode with them, heavy-hearted as heavy-eyed with sorrow and lack of sleep. He had served under the sick man for three years, and had learned to love him as men associated in toil of the hardest learn to love—or hate. Dropping from his horse he parted the curtains of the litter and peered inside.

They looked at the litter with concern. Inside, the Deputy Commissioner of the Kot-Kumharsen district was dying from a fever. Six warriors from a frontier clan he had inspired towards a more moderate way of living had carried him across rough terrain before he collapsed at the base of their unforgiving hills. Tallantire, his assistant, rode alongside them, weighed down by grief and exhaustion. He had worked under the sick man for three years and had come to care for him deeply, just as those who endure tough times together often do. He dismounted from his horse, pushed aside the curtains of the litter, and gazed inside.

‘Orde—Orde, old man, can you hear? We have to wait till the river goes down, worse luck.’

‘Orde—Orde, old man, can you hear me? We have to wait until the river goes down, unfortunately.’

‘I hear,’ returned a dry whisper. ‘Wait till the river goes down. I thought we should reach camp before the dawn. Polly knows. She’ll meet me.’

‘I hear,’ replied a quiet whisper. ‘Wait until the river lowers. I thought we’d make it to camp before dawn. Polly knows. She’ll meet me.’

One of the litter-men stared across the river and caught a faint twinkle of light on the far side. He whispered to Tallantire, ‘There are his camp-fires, and his wife. They will cross in the morning, for they have better boats. Can he live so long?’

One of the litter-men looked across the river and saw a faint glimmer of light on the other side. He whispered to Tallantire, “Those are his campfires and his wife. They’ll cross in the morning because they have better boats. Can he last that long?”

Tallantire shook his head. Yardley-Orde was very near to death. What need to vex his soul with hopes of a meeting that could not be? The river gulped at the banks, brought down a cliff of sand, and snarled the more hungrily. The litter-men sought for fuel in the waste-dried camel-thorn and refuse of the camps that had waited at the ford. Their sword-belts clinked as they moved softly in the haze of the moonlight, and Tallantire’s horse coughed to explain that he would like a blanket.

Tallantire shook his head. Yardley-Orde was very close to death. What was the point of torturing himself with hopes for a meeting that couldn’t happen? The river lapped at the banks, washing away a cliff of sand, and roared even more fiercely. The litter-bearers searched for firewood among the dried camel-thorn and debris from the camps that had lingered at the crossing. Their sword-belts jingled as they moved quietly in the moonlight haze, and Tallantire's horse coughed as if to say it wanted a blanket.

‘I’m cold too,’ said the voice from the litter. ‘I fancy this is the end. Poor Polly!’

‘I’m cold too,’ said the voice from the pile. ‘I think this is the end. Poor Polly!’

Tallantire rearranged the blankets. Khoda Dad Khan, seeing this, stripped off his own heavy-wadded sheepskin coat and added it to the pile. ‘I shall be warm by the fire presently,’ said he. Tallantire took the wasted body of his chief into his arms and held it against his breast. Perhaps if they kept him very warm Orde might live to see his wife once more. If only blind Providence would send a three-foot fall in the river!

Tallantire adjusted the blankets. Khoda Dad Khan, noticing this, took off his own heavy sheepskin coat and added it to the pile. "I'll be warm by the fire soon," he said. Tallantire cradled his chief's frail body in his arms, holding it close to his chest. Maybe if they kept him really warm, Orde could survive long enough to see his wife again. If only fate would send a three-foot rise in the river!

‘That’s better,’ said Orde faintly. ‘Sorry to be a nuisance, but is—is there anything to drink?’

‘That’s better,’ said Orde weakly. ‘Sorry to be a bother, but is there anything to drink?’

They gave him milk and whisky, and Tallantire felt a little warmth against his own breast. Orde began to mutter.

They gave him milk and whiskey, and Tallantire felt a bit of warmth against his chest. Orde started to mumble.

‘It isn’t that I mind dying,’ he said. ‘It’s leaving Polly and the district. Thank God! we have no children. Dick, you know, I’m dipped—awfully dipped—debts in my first five years’ service. It isn’t much of a pension, but enough for her. She has her mother at home. Getting there is the difficulty. And—and—you see, not being a soldier’s wife—’

‘It’s not that I mind dying,’ he said. ‘It’s leaving Polly and the area. Thank God we don’t have any kids. Dick, you know I’m in deep—really deep—with debts from my first five years of service. The pension isn’t great, but it should be enough for her. She has her mother at home. The hard part is getting there. And—and—you see, since she’s not a soldier’s wife—’

‘We’ll arrange the passage home, of course,’ said Tallantire quietly.

‘We’ll organize the trip back home, of course,’ said Tallantire quietly.

‘It’s not nice to think of sending round the hat; but, good Lord! how many men I lie here and remember that had to do it! Morten’s dead—he was of my year. Shaughnessy is dead, and he had children; I remember he used to read us their school-letters; what a bore we thought him! Evans is dead—Kot-Kumharsen killed him! Ricketts of Myndonie is dead—and I’m going too. “Man that is born of a woman is small potatoes and few in the hill.” That reminds me, Dick; the four Khusru Kheyl villages in our border want a one-third remittance this spring. That’s fair; their crops are bad. See that they get it, and speak to Ferris about the canal. I should like to have lived till that was finished; it means so much for the North-Indus villages—but Ferris is an idle beggar—wake him up. You’ll have charge of the district till my successor comes. I wish they would appoint you permanently; you know the folk. I suppose it will be Bullows, though. ‘Good man, but too weak for frontier work; and he doesn’t understand the priests. The blind priest at Jagai will bear watching. You’ll find it in my papers,—in the uniform-case, I think. Call the Khusru Kheyl men up; I’ll hold my last public audience. Khoda Dad Khan!’

‘It’s not great to think about passing around the hat; but, good Lord! how many men I lie here and remember that had to do it! Morten’s dead—he was from my year. Shaughnessy is dead, and he had kids; I remember he used to read us their school letters; what a drag we thought he was! Evans is dead—Kot-Kumharsen killed him! Ricketts of Myndonie is dead—and I’m going too. “Man that is born of a woman is small potatoes and few in the hill.” That reminds me, Dick; the four Khusru Kheyl villages on our border want a one-third remittance this spring. That’s fair; their crops are bad. Make sure they get it, and talk to Ferris about the canal. I’d like to have lived until that was finished; it means a lot for the North-Indus villages—but Ferris is a lazy slacker—wake him up. You’ll be in charge of the district until my successor comes. I wish they would appoint you permanently; you know the people. I suppose it will be Bullows, though. ‘Good guy, but too weak for frontier work; and he doesn’t understand the priests. The blind priest at Jagai will need to be watched. You’ll find it in my papers,—in the uniform case, I think. Call the Khusru Kheyl men up; I’ll hold my last public audience. Khoda Dad Khan!’

The leader of the men sprang to the side of the litter, his companions following.

The leader of the group jumped to the side of the stretcher, with his friends following.

‘Men, I’m dying,’ said Orde quickly, in the vernacular; ‘and soon there will be no more Orde Sahib to twist your tails and prevent you from raiding cattle.’

‘Guys, I’m dying,’ said Orde quickly, using the local slang; ‘and soon there won’t be any more Orde Sahib to mess with you and stop you from stealing cattle.’

‘God forbid this thing!’ broke out the deep bass chorus. ‘The Sahib is not going to die.’

‘God forbid this thing!’ erupted the deep bass chorus. ‘The Sahib isn’t going to die.’

‘Yes, he is; and then he will know whether Mahomed speaks truth, or Moses. But you must be good men, when I am not here. Such of you as live in our borders must pay your taxes quietly as before. I have spoken of the villages to be gently treated this year. Such of you as live in the hills must refrain from cattle-lifting, and burn no more thatch, and turn a deaf ear to the voice of the priests, who, not knowing the strength of the Government, would lead you into foolish wars, wherein you will surely die and your crops be eaten by strangers. And you must not sack any caravans, and must leave your arms at the police-post when you come in; as has been your custom, and my order. And Tallantire Sahib will be with you, but I do not know who takes my place. I speak now true talk, for I am as it were already dead, my children,—for though ye be strong men, ye are children.’

‘Yes, he is; and then he will find out if Mahomed is telling the truth or if it’s Moses. But you need to behave like good people when I’m not around. Those of you living in our borders must pay your taxes quietly like before. I’ve mentioned that the villages should be treated kindly this year. Those of you in the hills must stop stealing cattle, avoid burning thatch, and ignore the priests who, not knowing the strength of the Government, would lead you into pointless wars where you would surely die and your crops would be taken by outsiders. You must not raid any caravans, and you must leave your weapons at the police post when you come in, as has been your custom and my order. Tallantire Sahib will be with you, but I don’t know who will take my place. I’m speaking honestly now, for I feel as if I am already dead, my children—for even though you are strong men, you are still children.’

‘And thou art our father and our mother,’ broke in Khoda Dad Khan with an oath. ‘What shall we do, now there is no one to speak for us, or to teach us to go wisely!’

‘And you are our father and our mother,’ interrupted Khoda Dad Khan with an oath. ‘What are we supposed to do now that there's no one to speak for us or to teach us to act wisely!’

‘There remains Tallantire Sahib. Go to him; he knows your talk and your heart. Keep the young men quiet, listen to the old men, and obey. Khoda Dad Khan, take my ring. The watch and chain go to thy brother. Keep those things for my sake, and I will speak to whatever God I may encounter and tell him that the Khusru Kheyl are good men. Ye have my leave to go.’

‘There’s still Tallantire Sahib. Go see him; he understands you and your feelings. Keep the young guys quiet, listen to the elders, and follow their advice. Khoda Dad Khan, take my ring. The watch and chain go to your brother. Keep those things for my sake, and I’ll talk to whatever God I come across and tell him that the Khusru Kheyl are good people. You have my permission to leave.’

Khoda Dad Khan, the ring upon his finger, choked audibly as he caught the well-known formula that closed an interview. His brother turned to look across the river. The dawn was breaking, and a speck of white showed on the dull silver of the stream. ‘She comes,’ said the man under his breath. ‘Can he live for another two hours?’ And he pulled the newly-acquired watch out of his belt and looked uncomprehendingly at the dial, as he had seen Englishmen do.

Khoda Dad Khan, the ring on his finger, gasped as he heard the familiar phrase that ended an interview. His brother glanced over at the river. The dawn was breaking, and a spot of white appeared on the dull silver of the stream. “She’s coming,” the man murmured. “Can he last for another two hours?” He took the newly-acquired watch out of his belt and stared at the dial in confusion, just like he had seen Englishmen do.

For two hours the bellying sail tacked and blundered up and down the river, Tallantire still clasping Orde in his arms, and Khoda Dad Khan chafing his feet. He spoke now and again of the district and his wife, but, as the end neared, more frequently of the latter. They hoped he did not know that she was even then risking her life in a crazy native boat to regain him. But the awful foreknowledge of the dying deceived them. Wrenching himself forward, Orde looked through the curtains and saw how near was the sail. ‘That’s Polly,’ he said simply, though his mouth was wried with agony. ‘Polly and—the grimmest practical joke ever played on a man. Dick—you’ll—have—to—explain.’

For two hours, the sail puffed and struggled up and down the river, with Tallantire still holding Orde in his arms and Khoda Dad Khan rubbing his feet. He occasionally mentioned the area and his wife, but as the end approached, he talked more about her. They hoped he didn’t realize that she was risking her life in a crazy local boat to come get him. But the terrible truth of the dying was deceiving them. Straining forward, Orde looked through the curtains and saw how close the sail was. "That’s Polly," he said simply, even though his face was twisted with pain. "Polly and—the darkest practical joke ever played on a man. Dick—you’ll—have—to—explain."

And an hour later Tallantire met on the bank a woman in a gingham riding-habit and a sun-hat who cried out to him for her husband—her boy and her darling—while Khoda Dad Khan threw himself face-down on the sand and covered his eyes.

And an hour later, Tallantire met a woman on the riverbank wearing a checkered riding outfit and a sun hat who shouted to him for her husband—her boy and her darling—while Khoda Dad Khan threw himself face-down on the sand and covered his eyes.

II

The very simplicity of the notion was its charm. What more easy to win a reputation for far-seeing statesmanship, originality, and, above all, deference to the desires of the people, than by appointing a child of the country to the rule of that country? Two hundred millions of the most loving and grateful folk under Her Majesty’s dominion would laud the fact, and their praise would endure for ever. Yet he was indifferent to praise or blame, as befitted the Very Greatest of All the Viceroys. His administration was based upon principle, and the principle must be enforced in season and out of season. His pen and tongue had created the New India, teeming with possibilities—loud-voiced, insistent, a nation among nations—all his very own. Wherefore the Very Greatest of All the Viceroys took another step in advance, and with it counsel of those who should have advised him on the appointment of a successor to Yardley-Orde. There was a gentleman and a member of the Bengal Civil Service who had won his place and a university degree to boot in fair and open competition with the sons of the English. He was cultured, of the world, and, if report spoke truly, had wisely and, above all, sympathetically ruled a crowded district in South-Eastern Bengal. He had been to England and charmed many drawing-rooms there. His name, if the Viceroy recollected aright, was Mr. Grish Chunder De, M. A. In short, did anybody see any objection to the appointment, always on principle, of a man of the people to rule the people? The district in South-Eastern Bengal might with advantage, he apprehended, pass over to a younger civilian of Mr. G. C. De’s nationality (who had written a remarkably clever pamphlet on the political value of sympathy in administration); and Mr. G. C. De could be transferred northward to Kot-Kumharsen. The Viceroy was averse, on principle, to interfering with appointments under control of the Provincial Governments. He wished it to be understood that he merely recommended and advised in this instance. As regarded the mere question of race, Mr. Grish Chunder De was more English than the English, and yet possessed of that peculiar sympathy and insight which the best among the best Service in the world could only win to at the end of their service.

The very simplicity of the idea was its appeal. What could be easier than earning a reputation for visionary leadership, originality, and especially, respect for the people's wishes, than by appointing someone from that very country to lead it? Two hundred million of the most loving and grateful people under Her Majesty’s rule would celebrate the decision, and their praise would last forever. Yet he didn’t care about praise or criticism, as was fitting for the Very Greatest of All the Viceroys. His management was based on principles, and those principles needed to be upheld consistently. His writing and speaking had shaped the New India, full of potential—loud, assertive, a nation among nations—all created by him. Therefore, the Very Greatest of All the Viceroys took another step forward, seeking advice on who should succeed Yardley-Orde. There was a gentleman in the Bengal Civil Service who earned his position and a university degree through fair competition with the sons of England. He was cultured, worldly, and if the reports were accurate, had governed a populous district in South-Eastern Bengal wisely and empathetically. He had visited England and impressed many social circles there. His name, if the Viceroy remembered correctly, was Mr. Grish Chunder De, M.A. In short, did anyone have any objections to appointing, as a matter of principle, a man of the people to govern the people? The district in South-Eastern Bengal could benefit, he believed, by transitioning to a younger civil servant of Mr. G. C. De’s background (who had written a remarkably insightful pamphlet on the political value of empathy in governance); Mr. G. C. De could be moved northward to Kot-Kumharsen. The Viceroy was against, as a matter of principle, interfering with appointments managed by the Provincial Governments. He wanted it to be clear that he was only recommending and advising in this case. As for the question of race, Mr. Grish Chunder De was more English than the English themselves, yet had that unique empathy and understanding which only the finest in the civil service could hope to develop by the end of their careers.

The stern, black-bearded kings who sit about the Council-board of India divided on the step, with the inevitable result of driving the Very Greatest of All the Viceroys into the borders of hysteria, and a bewildered obstinacy pathetic as that of a child.

The serious, black-bearded kings who gather around the Council table of India were divided on the decision, which inevitably pushed the Very Greatest of All the Viceroys to the brink of hysteria, displaying a confused stubbornness that was as sad as that of a child.

‘The principle is sound enough,’ said the weary-eyed Head of the Red Provinces in which Kot-Kumharsen lay, for he too held theories. ‘The only difficulty is—’

‘The principle is pretty solid,’ said the tired-looking Head of the Red Provinces where Kot-Kumharsen was located, as he had his own theories too. ‘The only problem is—’

‘Put the screw on the District officials; brigade De with a very strong Deputy Commissioner on each side of him; give him the best assistant in the Province; rub the fear of God into the people beforehand; and if anything goes wrong, say that his colleagues didn’t back him up. All these lovely little experiments recoil on the District-Officer in the end,’ said the Knight of the Drawn Sword with a truthful brutality that made the Head of the Red Provinces shudder. And on a tacit understanding of this kind the transfer was accomplished, as quietly as might be for many reasons.

‘Put the pressure on the District officials; surround him with a really strong Deputy Commissioner on each side; give him the best assistant in the Province; instill the fear of God into the people beforehand; and if anything goes wrong, just say that his colleagues didn’t support him. All these lovely little experiments end up backfiring on the District Officer in the end,’ said the Knight of the Drawn Sword with a blunt honesty that made the Head of the Red Provinces shudder. And based on this unspoken understanding, the transfer was made as quietly as possible for many reasons.

It is sad to think that what goes for public opinion in India did not generally see the wisdom of the Viceroy’s appointment. There were not lacking indeed hireling organs, notoriously in the pay of a tyrannous bureaucracy, who more than hinted that His Excellency was a fool, a dreamer of dreams, a doctrinaire, and, worst of all, a trifler with the lives of men. ‘The Viceroy’s Excellence Gazette,’ published in Calcutta, was at pains to thank ‘Our beloved Viceroy for once more and again thus gloriously vindicating the potentialities of the Bengali nations for extended executive and administrative duties in foreign parts beyond our ken. We do not at all doubt that our excellent fellow-townsman, Mr. Grish Chunder De, Esq., M. A., will uphold the prestige of the Bengali, notwithstanding what underhand intrigue and peshbundi may be set on foot to insidiously nip his fame and blast his prospects among the proud civilians, some of which will now have to serve under a despised native and take orders too. How will you like that, Misters? We entreat our beloved Viceroy still to substantiate himself superiorly to race-prejudice and colour-blindness, and to allow the flower of this now OUR Civil Service all the full pays and allowances granted to his more fortunate brethren.’

It’s disheartening to realize that public opinion in India largely failed to appreciate the Viceroy’s appointment. There were indeed some paid sources, clearly under the influence of a tyrannical bureaucracy, that suggested His Excellency was foolish, a dreamer, a dogmatist, and, worst of all, careless with people's lives. ‘The Viceroy’s Excellence Gazette,’ published in Calcutta, was eager to thank ‘Our beloved Viceroy for once again gloriously validating the abilities of the Bengali nations for greater executive and administrative responsibilities in places beyond our understanding. We have no doubt that our esteemed fellow-townsman, Mr. Grish Chunder De, Esq., M.A., will maintain the reputation of the Bengali, despite any underhanded schemes and deceitful tactics that may be used to undermine his reputation and ruin his prospects among the proud civil service, some of whom will now have to report to a despised local and take orders. How do you feel about that, gentlemen? We urge our beloved Viceroy to rise above racial prejudice and color-blindness, and to grant the best of our now OUR Civil Service all the full salaries and benefits given to his more fortunate colleagues.’

III

‘When does this man take over charge? I’m alone just now, and I gather that I’m to stand fast under him.’

‘When does this guy take over? I’m on my own right now, and I get that I’m supposed to hold my ground under him.’

‘Would you have cared for a transfer?’ said Bullows keenly. Then, laying his hand on Tallantire’s shoulder: ‘We’re all in the same boat; don’t desert us. And yet, why the devil should you stay, if you can get another charge?’

“Would you have liked a transfer?” Bullows asked eagerly. Then, putting his hand on Tallantire’s shoulder, he said, “We’re all in the same boat; don’t abandon us. But still, why on earth would you stick around if you can get another position?”

‘It was Orde’s,’ said Tallantire simply.

‘It was Orde’s,’ Tallantire said plainly.

‘Well, it’s De’s now. He’s a Bengali of the Bengalis, crammed with code and case law; a beautiful man so far as routine and deskwork go, and pleasant to talk to. They naturally have always kept him in his own home district, where all his sisters and his cousins and his aunts lived, somewhere south of Dacca. He did no more than turn the place into a pleasant little family preserve, allowed his subordinates to do what they liked, and let everybody have a chance at the shekels. Consequently he’s immensely popular down there.’

‘Well, it’s De’s now. He’s a true Bengali, packed with codes and case law; a charming man when it comes to routine and paperwork, and easy to chat with. They’ve always kept him in his home district, where all his sisters, cousins, and aunts live, somewhere south of Dhaka. He simply turned the place into a nice little family haven, let his subordinates do as they pleased, and gave everyone a shot at the money. As a result, he’s really popular down there.’

‘I’ve nothing to do with that. How on earth am I to explain to the district that they are going to be governed by a Bengali? Do you—does the Government, I mean—suppose that the Khusru Kheyl will sit quiet when they once know? What will the Mahomedan heads of villages say? How will the police—Muzbi Sikhs and Pathans—how will THEY work under him? We couldn’t say anything if the Government appointed a sweeper; but my people will say a good deal, you know that. It’s a piece of cruel folly!’

‘I have nothing to do with that. How am I supposed to explain to the district that they’re going to be governed by a Bengali? Do you—does the Government, I mean—think that the Khusru Kheyl will sit back quietly once they find out? What will the Muslim leaders of the villages say? How will the police—Muzbi Sikhs and Pathans—how will THEY work under him? We wouldn’t say anything if the Government appointed a sweeper; but my people will definitely have a lot to say, you know that. It’s completely reckless!’

‘My dear boy, I know all that, and more. I’ve represented it, and have been told that I am exhibiting “culpable and puerile prejudice.” By Jove, if the Khusru Kheyl don’t exhibit something worse than that I don’t know the Border! The chances are that you will have the district alight on your hands, and I shall have to leave my work and help you pull through. I needn’t ask you to stand by the Bengali man in every possible way. You’ll do that for your own sake.’

‘My dear boy, I know all of that and even more. I've represented it, and I've been told that I'm showing “culpable and childish prejudice.” By God, if the Khusru Kheyl don’t show something worse than that, I don’t know the Border! You’re likely to have the district on fire, and I’ll have to drop my work to help you get through it. I don’t even need to ask you to support the Bengali man in every way possible. You’ll do that for your own sake.’

‘For Orde’s. I can’t say that I care twopence personally.’

‘For Orde’s. I can’t say that I care at all.’

‘Don’t be an ass. It’s grievous enough, God knows, and the Government will know later on; but that’s no reason for your sulking. YOU must try to run the district, YOU must stand between him and as much insult as possible; YOU must show him the ropes; YOU must pacify the Khusru Kheyl, and just warn Curbar of the Police to look out for trouble by the way. I’m always at the end of a telegraph-wire, and willing to peril my reputation to hold the district together. You’ll lose yours, of course, If you keep things straight, and he isn’t actually beaten with a stick when he’s on tour, he’ll get all the credit. If anything goes wrong, you’ll be told that you didn’t support him loyally.’

‘Don’t be foolish. It’s bad enough, believe me, and the Government will realize it later; but that’s no excuse for you to sulk. YOU need to manage the district, YOU must protect him from as much disrespect as possible; YOU have to show him how things work; YOU need to calm the Khusru Kheyl, and just alert Curbar from the Police to watch out for trouble. I’m always just a telegraph away and willing to risk my reputation to keep the district stable. You’ll risk yours, of course, but if you keep things in order and he isn’t actually beaten with a stick while he’s on tour, he’ll get all the praise. If anything goes wrong, you’ll be accused of not supporting him loyally.’

‘I know what I’ve got to do,’ said Tallantire wearily, ‘and I’m going to do it. But it’s hard.’

‘I know what I need to do,’ said Tallantire tiredly, ‘and I’m going to do it. But it’s tough.’

‘The work is with us, the event is with Allah,—as Orde used to say when he was more than usually in hot water.’ And Bullows rode away.

‘The work is ours, the outcome is with God,’ as Orde used to say when he was in a particularly tough spot.’ And Bullows rode away.

That two gentlemen in Her Majesty’s Bengal Civil Service should thus discuss a third, also in that service, and a cultured and affable man withal, seems strange and saddening. Yet listen to the artless babble of the Blind Mullah of Jagai, the priest of the Khusru Kheyl, sitting upon a rock overlooking the Border. Five years before, a chance-hurled shell from a screw-gun battery had dashed earth in the face of the Mullah, then urging a rush of Ghazis against half a dozen British bayonets. So he became blind, and hated the English none the less for the little accident. Yardley-Orde knew his failing, and had many times laughed at him therefor.

That two gentlemen in Her Majesty’s Bengal Civil Service would discuss a third colleague, also in that service and a cultured, friendly man, seems odd and unfortunate. But listen to the innocent chatter of the Blind Mullah of Jagai, the priest of the Khusru Kheyl, sitting on a rock overlooking the Border. Five years earlier, a randomly fired shell from a screw-gun battery had thrown dirt in the Mullah's face while he urged a charge of Ghazis against a handful of British bayonets. As a result, he went blind and hated the English even more because of that little mishap. Yardley-Orde was aware of his condition and had often laughed at him for it.

‘Dogs you are,’ said the Blind Mullah to the listening tribesmen round the fire. ‘Whipped dogs! Because you listened to Orde Sahib and called him father and behaved as his children, the British Government have proven how they regard you. Orde Sahib ye know is dead.’

‘You’re nothing but dogs,’ the Blind Mullah said to the tribesmen gathered around the fire. ‘Whipped dogs! Because you listened to Orde Sahib, called him father, and acted like his children, the British Government has shown how they feel about you. Orde Sahib, as you know, is dead.’

‘Ai! ai! ai!’ said half a dozen voices.

‘Oh! oh! oh!’ said half a dozen voices.

‘He was a man. Comes now in his stead, whom think ye? A Bengali of Bengal—an eater of fish from the South.’

‘He was a man. Now here comes in his place, who do you think? A Bengali from Bengal—someone who eats fish from the South.’

‘A lie!’ said Khoda Dad Khan. ‘And but for the small matter of thy priesthood, I’d drive my gun butt-first down thy throat.’

“A lie!” said Khoda Dad Khan. “If it weren’t for your priesthood, I’d shove my gun down your throat.”

‘Oho, art thou there, lickspittle of the English? Go in to-morrow across the Border to pay service to Orde Sahib’s successor, and thou shalt slip thy shoes at the tent-door of a Bengali, as thou shalt hand thy offering to a Bengali’s black fist. This I know; and in my youth, when a young man spoke evil to a Mullah holding the doors of Heaven and Hell, the gun-butt was not rammed down the Mullah’s gullet. No!’

‘Oh, are you there, sycophant of the English? Go tomorrow across the Border to pay your respects to Orde Sahib’s successor, and you will take off your shoes at the tent door of a Bengali, as you hand your offering to a Bengali’s black fist. I know this; and in my youth, when a young man insulted a Mullah guarding the gates of Heaven and Hell, the gun-butt was not shoved down the Mullah’s throat. No!’

The Blind Mullah hated Khoda Dad Khan with Afghan hatred; both being rivals for the headship of the tribe; but the latter was feared for bodily as the other for spiritual gifts. Khoda Dad Khan looked at Orde’s ring and grunted, ‘I go in to-morrow because I am not an old fool, preaching war against the English. If the Government, smitten with madness, have done this, then...’

The Blind Mullah had a deep-seated hatred for Khoda Dad Khan, a hatred typical among Afghans; they were rivals for the leadership of the tribe. While one was feared for his physical strength, the other was respected for his spiritual wisdom. Khoda Dad Khan glanced at Orde’s ring and said with a grunt, “I’m going in tomorrow because I’m not an old fool preaching war against the English. If the government, driven by madness, has done this, then...”

‘Then,’ croaked the Mullah, ‘thou wilt take out the young men and strike at the four villages within the Border?’

‘Then,’ croaked the Mullah, ‘you will take out the young men and attack the four villages within the Border?’

‘Or wring thy neck, black raven of Jehannum, for a bearer of ill-tidings.’

‘Or twist your neck, black raven of hell, for carrying bad news.’

Khoda Dad Khan oiled his long locks with great care, put on his best Bokhara belt, a new turban-cap and fine green shoes, and accompanied by a few friends came down from the hills to pay a visit to the new Deputy Commissioner of Kot-Kumharsen. Also he bore tribute—four or five priceless gold mohurs of Akbar’s time in a white handkerchief. These the Deputy Commissioner would touch and remit. The little ceremony used to be a sign that, so far as Khoda Dad Khan’s personal influence went, the Khusru Kheyl would be good boys,—till the next time; especially if Khoda Dad Khan happened to like the new Deputy Commissioner. In Yardley-Orde’s consulship his visit concluded with a sumptuous dinner and perhaps forbidden liquors; certainly with some wonderful tales and great good-fellowship. Then Khoda Dad Khan would swagger back to his hold, vowing that Orde Sahib was one prince and Tallantire Sahib another, and that whosoever went a-raiding into British territory would be flayed alive. On this occasion he found the Deputy Commissioner’s tents looking much as usual. Regarding himself as privileged he strode through the open door to confont a suave, portly Bengali in English costume writing at a table. Unversed in the elevating influence of education, and not in the least caring for university degrees, Khoda Dad Khan promptly set the man down for a Babu—the native clerk of the Deputy Commissioner—a hated and despised animal.

Khoda Dad Khan carefully oiled his long hair, put on his best Bokhara belt, a new turban-cap, and nice green shoes, then came down from the hills with a few friends to visit the new Deputy Commissioner of Kot-Kumharsen. He also brought a tribute—four or five precious gold mohurs from Akbar's time wrapped in a white handkerchief. The Deputy Commissioner would touch these and send them back. This little ceremony was a sign that, as far as Khoda Dad Khan's personal influence went, the Khusru Kheyl would behave well—at least for a while; especially if Khoda Dad Khan happened to like the new Deputy Commissioner. During Yardley-Orde's time, his visit ended with a lavish dinner and maybe some forbidden drinks; definitely with great stories and good camaraderie. Then Khoda Dad Khan would swagger back to his place, claiming that Orde Sahib was a prince and Tallantire Sahib another, and that anyone who raided British territory would be punished severely. This time, he found the Deputy Commissioner's tents looking pretty much the same as usual. Feeling entitled, he walked through the open door to confront a smooth, plump Bengali dressed in English clothes, writing at a table. Unfamiliar with the uplifting power of education and not caring at all about university degrees, Khoda Dad Khan quickly judged the man to be a Babu—the Deputy Commissioner's native clerk—a figure he hated and despised.

‘Ugh!’ said he cheerfully. ‘Where’s your master, Babujee?’

‘Ugh!’ he said cheerfully. ‘Where's your boss, Babujee?’

‘I am the Deputy Commissioner,’ said the gentleman in English. Now he overvalued the effects of university degrees, and stared Khoda Dad Khan in the face. But if from your earliest infancy you have been accustomed to look on battle, murder, and sudden death, if spilt blood affects your nerves as much as red paint, and, above all, if you have faithfully believed that the Bengali was the servant of all Hindustan, and that all Hindustan was vastly inferior to your own large, lustful self, you can endure, even though uneducated, a very large amount of looking over. You can even stare down a graduate of an Oxford college if the latter has been born in a hothouse, of stock bred in a hothouse, and fearing physical pain as some men fear sin; especially if your opponent’s mother has frightened him to sleep in his youth with horrible stories of devils inhabiting Afghanistan, and dismal legends of the black North. The eyes behind the gold spectacles sought the floor. Khoda Dad Khan chuckled, and swung out to find Tallantire hard by. ‘Here,’ said he roughly, thrusting the coins before him, ‘touch and remit. That answers for MY good behaviour. But, O Sahib, has the Government gone mad to send a black Bengali dog to us? And am I to pay service to such an one? And are you to work under him? What does it mean?’ ‘It is an order,’ said Tallantire. He had expected something of this kind. ‘He is a very clever S-sahib.’

‘I am the Deputy Commissioner,’ the man said in English. He placed too much importance on university degrees and stared Khoda Dad Khan in the face. But if from a young age you’ve been used to seeing battle, murder, and sudden death, if spilled blood affects you as much as red paint does, and especially if you've always believed that the Bengali was the servant of all Hindustan, and that all Hindustan was vastly inferior to your own large, lustful self, you can handle, even if uneducated, a whole lot of scrutiny. You can even stare down a graduate from Oxford if he was raised in a sheltered environment, comes from a timid background, and fears physical pain as some men fear sin; particularly if your opponent’s mother scared him to sleep as a child with terrifying stories about demons in Afghanistan and gloomy legends from the North. The eyes behind the gold spectacles dropped to the floor. Khoda Dad Khan chuckled and stepped out to find Tallantire nearby. ‘Here,’ he said roughly, pushing the coins toward him, ‘take these and let it be known. That covers MY good behavior. But, oh Sahib, has the Government lost its mind sending a black Bengali here? And am I expected to serve someone like him? And are you supposed to work under him? What does this mean?’ ‘It’s an order,’ Tallantire replied. He had anticipated something like this. ‘He’s a very clever S-sahib.’

‘He a Sahib! He’s a kala admi—a black man—unfit to run at the tail of a potter’s donkey. All the peoples of the earth have harried Bengal. It is written. Thou knowest when we of the North wanted women or plunder whither went we? To Bengal—where else? What child’s talk is this of Sahibdom—after Orde Sahib too! Of a truth the Blind Mullah was right.’

‘He's a Sahib! He's a black man—completely unfit to be at the back of a potter’s donkey. All the peoples of the earth have troubled Bengal. It's written. You know when we from the North wanted women or loot, where did we go? To Bengal—where else? What childish talk is this about being a Sahib—especially after Orde Sahib! The Blind Mullah was truly right.’

‘What of him?’ asked Tallantire uneasily. He mistrusted that old man with his dead eyes and his deadly tongue.

‘What about him?’ asked Tallantire uneasily. He didn't trust that old man with his lifeless eyes and sharp tongue.

‘Nay, now, because of the oath that I sware to Orde Sahib when we watched him die by the river yonder, I will tell. In the first place, is it true that the English have set the heel of the Bengali on their own neck, and that there is no more English rule in the land?’

‘No, now, because of the oath I swore to Orde Sahib when we watched him die by the river over there, I will share. First of all, is it true that the English have put the Bengali's heel on their own neck, and that there’s no more English rule in the land?’

‘I am here,’ said Tallantire, ‘and I serve the Maharanee of England.’

‘I’m here,’ said Tallantire, ‘and I serve the Maharanee of England.’

‘The Mullah said otherwise, and further that because we loved Orde Sahib the Government sent us a pig to show that we were dogs, who till now have been held by the strong hand. Also that they were taking away the white soldiers, that more Hindustanis might come, and that all was changing.’

‘The Mullah said something different, and also that because we cared for Orde Sahib, the Government sent us a pig to show that we were just dogs, who until now have been kept in line by force. He also mentioned that they were removing the white soldiers so that more Indians could come, and that everything was changing.’

This is the worst of ill-considered handling of a very large country. What looks so feasible in Calcutta, so right in Bombay, so unassailable in Madras, is misunderstood by the North and entirely changes its complexion on the banks of the Indus. Khoda Dad Khan explained as clearly as he could that, though he himself intended to be good, he really could not answer for the more reckless members of his tribe under the leadership of the Blind Mullah. They might or they might not give trouble, but they certainly had no intention whatever of obeying the new Deputy Commissioner. Was Tallantire perfectly sure that in the event of any systematic border-raiding the force in the district could put it down promptly?

This is the worst kind of mishandling of a very large country. What seems so achievable in Calcutta, so justified in Bombay, and so beyond question in Madras is completely misunderstood in the North and takes on a different character along the banks of the Indus. Khoda Dad Khan explained as clearly as he could that, while he himself wanted to do good, he couldn't guarantee the actions of the more reckless members of his tribe led by the Blind Mullah. They might cause trouble, or they might not, but they definitely had no intention of obeying the new Deputy Commissioner. Was Tallantire completely confident that if there were any organized border raids, the forces in the district could handle it quickly?

‘Tell the Mullah if he talks any more fool’s talk,’ said Tallantire curtly, ‘that he takes his men on to certain death, and his tribe to blockade, trespass-fine, and blood-money. But why do I talk to one who no longer carries weight in the counsels of the tribe?’

‘Tell the Mullah if he keeps talking nonsense,’ Tallantire said curtly, ‘that he’s leading his men to certain death, and putting his tribe at risk for blockades, trespass fines, and blood money. But why am I even talking to someone who no longer holds any influence in the tribe’s decisions?’

Khoda Dad Khan pocketed that insult. He had learned something that he much wanted to know, and returned to his hills to be sarcastically complimented by the Mullah, whose tongue raging round the camp-fires was deadlier flame than ever dung-cake fed.

Khoda Dad Khan took that insult silently. He had discovered something he really wanted to know and went back to his hills, where the Mullah sarcastically praised him, his words whipping around the campfires like a more dangerous flame than the one fueled by dung cakes.

IV

Be pleased to consider here for a moment the unknown district of Kot-Kumharsen. It lay cut lengthways by the Indus under the line of the Khusru hills—ramparts of useless earth and tumbled stone. It was seventy miles long by fifty broad, maintained a population of something less than two hundred thousand, and paid taxes to the extent of forty thousand pounds a year on an area that was by rather more than half sheer, hopeless waste. The cultivators were not gentle people, the miners for salt were less gentle still, and the cattle-breeders least gentle of all. A police-post in the top right-hand corner and a tiny mud fort in the top left-hand corner prevented as much salt-smuggling and cattle-lifting as the influence of the civilians could not put down; and in the bottom right-hand corner lay Jumala, the district headquarters—a pitiful knot of lime-washed barns facetiously rented as houses, reeking with frontier fever, leaking in the rain, and ovens in the summer.

Please consider for a moment the little-known area of Kot-Kumharsen. It was sliced in half by the Indus River, under the line of the Khusru hills—ramparts of useless earth and scattered stones. It stretched seventy miles long and fifty miles wide, with a population of just under two hundred thousand, and paid taxes amounting to forty thousand pounds a year on land that was more than half completely unproductive. The farmers weren't particularly nice people, the salt miners were even less nice, and the cattle breeders were the least nice of all. A police post in the top right corner and a small mud fort in the top left corner did what they could to stop salt smuggling and cattle theft that the locals couldn’t handle; meanwhile, in the bottom right corner sat Jumala, the district headquarters—a sad cluster of whitewashed barns humorously rented as homes, filled with frontier diseases, leaking when it rained, and boiling hot in the summer.

It was to this place that Grish Chunder De was travelling, there formally to take over charge of the district. But the news of his coming had gone before. Bengalis were as scarce as poodles among the simple Borderers, who cut each other’s heads open with their long spades and worshipped impartially at Hindu and Mahomedan shrines. They crowded to see him, pointing at him, and diversely comparing him to a gravid milch-buffalo, or a broken-down horse, as their limited range of metaphor prompted. They laughed at his police-guard, and wished to know how long the burly Sikhs were going to lead Bengali apes. They inquired whether he had brought his women with him, and advised him explicitly not to tamper with theirs. It remained for a wrinkled hag by the roadside to slap her lean breasts as he passed, crying, ‘I have suckled six that could have eaten six thousand of HIM. The Government shot them, and made this That a king!’ Whereat a blue-turbaned huge-boned plough-mender shouted, ‘Have hope, mother o’ mine! He may yet go the way of thy wastrels.’ And the children, the little brown puff-balls, regarded curiously. It was generally a good thing for infancy to stray into Orde Sahib’s tent, where copper coins were to be won for the mere wishing, and tales of the most authentic, such as even their mothers knew but the first half of. No! This fat black man could never tell them how Pir Prith hauled the eye-teeth out of ten devils; how the big stones came to lie all in a row on top of the Khusru hills, and what happened if you shouted through the village-gate to the gray wolf at even ‘Badl Khas is dead.’ Meantime Grish Chunder De talked hastily and much to Tallantire, after the manner of those who are ‘more English than the English,’—of Oxford and ‘home,’ with much curious book-knowledge of bump-suppers, cricket-matches, hunting-runs, and other unholy sports of the alien. ‘We must get these fellows in hand,’ he said once or twice uneasily; ‘get them well in hand, and drive them on a tight rein. No use, you know, being slack with your district.’

It was to this place that Grish Chunder De was traveling, officially to take over the district. But the news of his arrival had already spread. Bengalis were as rare as poodles among the simple Borderers, who frequently fought each other with their long spades and worshipped both Hindu and Muslim deities without bias. They gathered to see him, pointing at him and variously comparing him to a pregnant milch-buffalo or a worn-out horse, based on their limited imagination. They laughed at his police escort and wanted to know how long the burly Sikhs would be leading Bengali "apes." They asked if he had brought his family with him and clearly advised him not to interfere with theirs. Then a wrinkled old woman by the roadside slapped her lean breasts as he passed, shouting, “I’ve suckled six who could have devoured six thousand of him. The Government shot them and made that one a king!” At which, a blue-turbaned, large-boned plowman shouted, “Keep hope, my mother! He may yet meet the same fate as your wasted sons.” The little brown children watched with curiosity. It was generally a good thing for kids to wander into Orde Sahib’s tent, where they could win copper coins just by wishing, along with tales from the most authentic sources, which even their mothers only knew the first half of. No! This fat black man could never tell them how Pir Prith yanked the eye-teeth out of ten devils, how the big stones came to lie in a row on top of the Khusru hills, or what happened if you shouted through the village gate at dusk, “Badl Khas is dead.” Meanwhile, Grish Chunder De talked quickly and a lot to Tallantire, acting like those who are “more English than the English”—discussing Oxford and “home,” with plenty of curious book knowledge about bumps, cricket matches, hunting trips, and other unsanctioned pursuits of the foreigners. “We need to get these people under control,” he said a couple of times uneasily; “get them well under control and keep them on a tight leash. No point, you know, in being lax with your district.”

And a moment later Tallantire heard Debendra Nath De, who brotherliwise had followed his kinsman’s fortune and hoped for the shadow of his protection as a pleader, whisper in Bengali, ‘Better are dried fish at Dacca than drawn swords at Delhi. Brother of mine, these men are devils, as our mother said. And you will always have to ride upon a horse!’

And a moment later, Tallantire heard Debendra Nath De, who had followed his relative's fate and hoped for a bit of his protection as a lawyer, whisper in Bengali, "Dried fish in Dacca is better than drawn swords in Delhi. My brother, these guys are monsters, just like our mother said. And you’ll always need to ride a horse!"

That night there was a public audience in a broken-down little town thirty miles from Jumala, when the new Deputy Commissioner, in reply to the greetings of the subordinate native officials, delivered a speech. It was a carefully thought-out speech, which would have been very valuable had not his third sentence begun with three innocent words, ‘Hamara hookum hai—It is my order.’ Then there was a laugh, clear and bell-like, from the back of the big tent, where a few border landholders sat, and the laugh grew and scorn mingled with it, and the lean, keen face of Debendra Nath De paled, and Grish Chunder turning to Tallantire spake: ‘YOU—you put up this arrangement.’ Upon that instant the noise of hoofs rang without, and there entered Curbar, the District Superintendent of Police, sweating and dusty. The State had tossed him into a corner of the province for seventeen weary years, there to check smuggling of salt, and to hope for promotion that never came. He had forgotten how to keep his white uniform clean, had screwed rusty spurs into patent-leather shoes, and clothed his head indifferently with a helmet or a turban. Soured, old, worn with heat and cold, he waited till he should be entitled to sufficient pension to keep him from starving.

That night, there was a public gathering in a rundown little town thirty miles from Jumala, where the new Deputy Commissioner, responding to the greetings of the local officials, gave a speech. It was a carefully prepared speech that could have been quite impactful if it hadn’t been for his third sentence, which started with the three simple words, ‘Hamara hookum hai—It is my order.’ A laugh, clear and ringing, came from the back of the large tent where a few landowners from the border were sitting, and the laughter grew, mixed with scorn. The lean, sharp face of Debendra Nath De turned pale, and Grish Chunder turned to Tallantire and said, ‘YOU—you set this up.’ Just then, the sound of hooves echoed outside, and Curbar, the District Superintendent of Police, entered, sweaty and dusty. The State had shoved him into a corner of the province for seventeen exhausting years to oversee salt smuggling while he waited for a promotion that never came. He had forgotten how to keep his white uniform clean, had put rusty spurs on his patent-leather shoes, and carelessly wore either a helmet or a turban. Bitter, old, and weathered from heat and cold, he was waiting until he could retire with a pension sufficient to prevent him from starving.

‘Tallantire,’ said he, disregarding Grish Chunder De, ‘come outside. I want to speak to you.’ They withdrew. ‘It’s this,’ continued Curbar. ‘The Khusru Kheyl have rushed and cut up half a dozen of the coolies on Ferris’s new canal-embankment; killed a couple of men and carried off a woman. I wouldn’t trouble you about that—Ferris is after them and Hugonin, my assistant, with ten mounted police. But that’s only the beginning, I fancy. Their fires are out on the Hassan Ardeb heights, and unless we’re pretty quick there’ll be a flare-up all along our Border. They are sure to raid the four Khusru villages on our side of the line; there’s been bad blood between them for years; and you know the Blind Mullah has been preaching a holy war since Orde went out. What’s your notion?’

‘Tallantire,’ he said, ignoring Grish Chunder De, ‘come outside. I want to talk to you.’ They stepped away. ‘Here’s the deal,’ Curbar continued. ‘The Khusru Kheyl have rushed in and attacked half a dozen of the laborers on Ferris’s new canal-embankment; they’ve killed a couple of men and taken a woman. I wouldn’t bother you about it—Ferris is on their trail along with my assistant Hugonin and ten mounted police. But I think this is just the start. Their fires are burning on the Hassan Ardeb heights, and unless we act fast, there’ll be a major conflict along our Border. They’re definitely going to raid the four Khusru villages on our side; there’s been tension between them for years; and you know the Blind Mullah has been pushing for a holy war ever since Orde left. What do you think?’

‘Damn!’ said Tallantire thoughtfully. ‘They’ve begun quick. Well, it seems to me I’d better ride off to Fort Ziar and get what men I can there to picket among the lowland villages, if it’s not too late. Tommy Dodd commands at Fort Ziar, I think. Ferris and Hugonin ought to teach the canal-thieves a lesson, and—No, we can’t have the Head of the Police ostentatiously guarding the Treasury. You go back to the canal. I’ll wire Bullows to come into Jumala with a strong police-guard, and sit on the Treasury. They won’t touch the place, but it looks well.’

“Damn!” Tallantire said thoughtfully. “They’ve started quickly. Well, I think I’d better ride over to Fort Ziar and gather some men to patrol the lowland villages, if it’s not too late. I believe Tommy Dodd is in charge at Fort Ziar. Ferris and Hugonin should give the canal thieves a lesson, and—No, we can’t have the Head of Police obviously guarding the Treasury. You go back to the canal. I’ll send a message to Bullows to come to Jumala with a strong police guard and keep an eye on the Treasury. They won’t bother the place, but it looks good.”

‘I—I—I insist upon knowing what this means,’ said the voice of the Deputy Commissioner, who had followed the speakers.

‘I—I—I need to know what this means,’ said the voice of the Deputy Commissioner, who had followed the speakers.

‘Oh!’ said Curbar, who being in the Police could not understand that fifteen years of education must, on principle, change the Bengali into a Briton. ‘There has been a fight on the Border, and heaps of men are killed. There’s going to be another fight, and heaps more will be killed.’

‘Oh!’ said Curbar, who, being in the police, couldn’t grasp that fifteen years of education should, in theory, change a Bengali into a Brit. ‘There’s been a fight on the border, and loads of men are dead. There’s going to be another fight, and loads more will die.’

‘What for?’

'What's the purpose?'

‘Because the teeming millions of this district don’t exactly approve of you, and think that under your benign rule they are going to have a good time. It strikes me that you had better make arrangements. I act, as you know, by your orders. What do you advise?’

‘Because the countless people in this area don’t really like you and believe that under your kind leadership they will have a good time. I think you should make some plans. I am acting, as you know, on your orders. What do you suggest?’

‘I—I take you all to witness that I have not yet assumed charge of the district,’ stammered the Deputy Commissioner, not in the tones of the ‘more English.’

‘I—I’m calling you all to witness that I haven’t taken charge of the district yet,’ stammered the Deputy Commissioner, not in the tones of the ‘more English.’

‘Ah, I thought so. Well, as I was saying, Tallantire, your plan is sound. Carry it out. Do you want an escort?’

‘Ah, I figured as much. Anyway, as I was saying, Tallantire, your plan is good. Go for it. Do you need an escort?’

‘No; only a decent horse. But how about wiring to headquarters?’

‘No; just a decent horse. But what about contacting headquarters?’

‘I fancy, from the colour of his cheeks, that your superior officer will send some wonderful telegrams before the night’s over. Let him do that, and we shall have half the troops of the province coming up to see what’s the trouble. Well, run along, and take care of yourself—the Khusru Kheyl jab upwards from below, remember. Ho! Mir Khan, give Tallantire Sahib the best of the horses, and tell five men to ride to Jumala with the Deputy Commissioner Sahib Bahadur. There is a hurry toward.’

‘I think, based on the color of his cheeks, that your boss will be sending some amazing telegrams before the night is over. If he does that, we'll have half the troops in the province coming up to figure out what’s going on. Well, go on and take care of yourself—the Khusru Kheyl are coming up from below, just remember that. Hey! Mir Khan, give Tallantire Sahib the best horse, and tell five men to ride to Jumala with the Deputy Commissioner Sahib Bahadur. There’s a rush.’

There was; and it was not in the least bettered by Debendra Nath De clinging to a policeman’s bridle and demanding the shortest, the very shortest way to Jumala. Now originality is fatal to the Bengali. Debendra Nath should have stayed with his brother, who rode steadfastly for Jumala on the railway-line, thanking gods entirely unknown to the most catholic of universities that he had not taken charge of the district, and could still—happy resource of a fertile race!—fall sick.

There was, and it definitely didn’t get any better with Debendra Nath De hanging onto a policeman’s horse and insisting on the quickest, the absolute quickest way to Jumala. Now, being original is a downfall for the Bengali. Debendra Nath should have stuck with his brother, who was steadily heading to Jumala on the railway line, thanking gods that would be unfamiliar to the most inclusive universities for not being in charge of the district and still—thankfully for a creative people!—being able to get sick.

And I grieve to say that when he reached his goal two policemen, not devoid of rude wit, who had been conferring together as they bumped in their saddles, arranged an entertainment for his behoof. It consisted of first one and then the other entering his room with prodigious details of war, the massing of bloodthirsty and devilish tribes, and the burning of towns. It was almost as good, said these scamps, as riding with Curbar after evasive Afghans. Each invention kept the hearer at work for half an hour on telegrams which the sack of Delhi would hardly have justified. To every power that could move a bayonet or transfer a terrified man, Grish Chunder De appealed telegraphically. He was alone, his assistants had fled, and in truth he had not taken over charge of the district. Had the telegrams been despatched many things would have occurred; but since the only signaller in Jumala had gone to bed, and the station-master, after one look at the tremendous pile of paper, discovered that railway regulations forbade the forwarding of imperial messages, policemen Ram Singh and Nihal Singh were fain to turn the stuff into a pillow and slept on it very comfortably.

And I regret to say that when he finally reached his destination, two policemen, not lacking in crude humor, who had been chatting as they jostled in their saddles, set up a little show for him. It involved one after another entering his room with exaggerated tales of war, the gathering of savage and vicious tribes, and the burning of towns. They joked that it was almost as thrilling as riding with Curbar after elusive Afghans. Each story kept the listener busy for about half an hour crafting telegrams that the sack of Delhi would barely justify. Grish Chunder De sent out urgent telegrams to every authority that could wield a bayonet or relocate a terrified man. He was on his own; his assistants had run off, and in reality, he hadn’t taken charge of the district. If the telegrams had been sent, a lot could have happened; but since the only signaler in Jumala had gone to bed, and the station-master, after glancing at the enormous stack of papers, realized that railway regulations prohibited sending imperial messages, policemen Ram Singh and Nihal Singh were forced to use the papers as a pillow and slept quite comfortably on them.

Tallantire drove his spurs into a rampant skewbald stallion with china-blue eyes, and settled himself for the forty-mile ride to Fort Ziar. Knowing his district blindfold, he wasted no time hunting for short cuts, but headed across the richer grazing-ground to the ford where Orde had died and been buried. The dusty ground deadened the noise of his horse’s hoofs, the moon threw his shadow, a restless goblin, before him, and the heavy dew drenched him to the skin. Hillock, scrub that brushed against the horse’s belly, unmetalled road where the whip-like foliage of the tamarisks lashed his forehead, illimitable levels of lowland furred with bent and speckled with drowsing cattle, waste, and hillock anew, dragged themselves past, and the skewbald was labouring in the deep sand of the Indus-ford. Tallantire was conscious of no distinct thought till the nose of the dawdling ferry-boat grounded on the farther side, and his horse shied snorting at the white headstone of Orde’s grave. Then he uncovered, and shouted that the dead might hear, ‘They’re out, old man! Wish me luck.’ In the chill of the dawn he was hammering with a stirrup-iron at the gate of Fort Ziar, where fifty sabres of that tattered regiment, the Belooch Beshaklis were supposed to guard Her Majesty’s interests along a few hundred miles of Border. This particular fort was commanded by a subaltern, who, born of the ancient family of the Derouletts, naturally answered to the name of Tommy Dodd. Him Tallantire found robed in a sheepskin coat, shaking with fever like an aspen, and trying to read the native apothecary’s list of invalids.

Tallantire dug his spurs into a wild skewbald stallion with bright blue eyes and got ready for the forty-mile ride to Fort Ziar. Knowing his area inside and out, he didn't waste time looking for shortcuts but made his way across the richer grazing land to the ford where Orde had died and been buried. The dusty ground muffled the sound of his horse’s hooves, the moon cast his shadow like a restless goblin in front of him, and the heavy dew soaked him to the skin. Hillocks, scrub that brushed against the horse’s belly, unpaved roads where the whip-like branches of the tamarisks whipped at his forehead, endless stretches of lowland covered in bent grass and dotted with dozing cattle, waste, and more hillocks dragged past, and the skewbald struggled through the deep sand at the Indus ford. Tallantire didn't have any clear thoughts until the nose of the slow ferryboat touched down on the other side, and his horse jumped back, snorting at the white headstone of Orde’s grave. Then he took off his hat and shouted so the dead could hear, ‘They’re out, old man! Wish me luck.’ In the chill of dawn, he was banging with a stirrup iron on the gate of Fort Ziar, where fifty sabres of that worn regiment, the Belooch Beshaklis, were supposed to protect Her Majesty’s interests along a few hundred miles of the Border. This particular fort was under the command of a subaltern who, coming from the old family of the Derouletts, was naturally named Tommy Dodd. Tallantire found him dressed in a sheepskin coat, shaking with fever like a trembling aspen, and trying to read the local apothecary’s list of sick soldiers.

‘So you’ve come, too,’ said he. ‘Well, we’re all sick here, and I don’t think I can horse thirty men; but we’re bub—bub—bub blessed willing. Stop, does this impress you as a trap or a lie?’ He tossed a scrap of paper to Tallantire, on which was written painfully in crabbed Gurmukhi, ‘We cannot hold young horses. They will feed after the moon goes down in the four border villages issuing from the Jagai pass on the next night.’ Then in English round hand—‘Your sincere friend.’

‘So you’ve come too,’ he said. ‘Well, we’re all sick here, and I don’t think I can manage thirty men; but we’re definitely willing. Hold on, does this seem like a trap or a lie to you?’ He threw a scrap of paper to Tallantire, on which was written awkwardly in cramped Gurmukhi, ‘We cannot hold young horses. They will feed after the moon goes down in the four border villages coming from the Jagai pass the next night.’ Then in clear English—‘Your sincere friend.’

‘Good man!’ said Tallantire. ‘That’s Khoda Dad Khan’s work, I know. It’s the only piece of English he could ever keep in his head, and he is immensely proud of it. He is playing against the Blind Mullah for his own hand—the treacherous young ruffian!’

‘Good man!’ said Tallantire. ‘That’s Khoda Dad Khan’s doing, I’m sure. It’s the only English phrase he can remember, and he’s really proud of it. He’s playing against the Blind Mullah for his own benefit—the deceitful young punk!’

‘Don’t know the politics of the Khusru Kheyl, but if you’re satisfied, I am. That was pitched in over the gate-head last night, and I thought we might pull ourselves together and see what was on. Oh, but we’re sick with fever here and no mistake! Is this going to be a big business, think you?’ said Tommy Dodd.

‘Not sure about the politics of the Khusru Kheyl, but if you’re happy, I am. That was thrown over the gate last night, and I thought we could get ourselves organized and see what was going on. Oh, but we’re definitely sick with fever here! Do you think this is going to be a big deal?’ said Tommy Dodd.

Tallantire gave him briefly the outlines of the case, and Tommy Dodd whistled and shook with fever alternately. That day he devoted to strategy, the art of war, and the enlivenment of the invalids, till at dusk there stood ready forty-two troopers, lean, worn, and dishevelled, whom Tommy Dodd surveyed with pride, and addressed thus: ‘O men! If you die you will go to Hell. Therefore endeavour to keep alive. But if you go to Hell that place cannot be hotter than this place, and we are not told that we shall there suffer from fever. Consequently be not afraid of dying. File out there!’ They grinned, and went.

Tallantire quickly summarized the case for him, and Tommy Dodd whistled and shivered with fever alternately. He spent the day focusing on strategy, the art of war, and lifting the spirits of the sick, until at dusk, forty-two troopers—lean, tired, and disheveled—stood ready. Tommy Dodd looked them over with pride and said, “Hey, men! If you die, you’ll go to Hell. So do your best to stay alive. But if you do end up in Hell, it can’t be hotter than this place, and we’re not told that we’ll have to deal with fever there. So don’t be afraid of dying. Move out!” They grinned and then went.

V

It will be long ere the Khusru Kheyl forget their night attack on the lowland villages. The Mullah had promised an easy victory and unlimited plunder; but behold, armed troopers of the Queen had risen out of the very earth, cutting, slashing, and riding down under the stars, so that no man knew where to turn, and all feared that they had brought an army about their ears, and ran back to the hills. In the panic of that flight more men were seen to drop from wounds inflicted by an Afghan knife jabbed upwards, and yet more from long-range carbine-fire. Then there rose a cry of treachery, and when they reached their own guarded heights, they had left, with some forty dead and sixty wounded, all their confidence in the Blind Mullah on the plains below. They clamoured, swore, and argued round the fires; the women wailing for the lost, and the Mullah shrieking curses on the returned.

It will be a long time before the Khusru Kheyl forget the night attack on the lowland villages. The Mullah had promised an easy victory and endless loot; but look, armed soldiers of the Queen had emerged from the ground, cutting, slashing, and riding down under the stars, leaving no one knowing where to turn. Everyone feared they had brought an army down upon them and ran back to the hills. In the chaos of that flight, more men were seen to fall from wounds inflicted by an Afghan knife thrust upwards, and even more from long-range gunfire. Then a shout of betrayal rose up, and when they reached their own guarded heights, they left behind, with about forty dead and sixty wounded, all their faith in the Blind Mullah down in the plains. They shouted, cursed, and argued around the fires, while the women wailed for the lost, and the Mullah screamed curses at those who returned.

Then Khoda Dad Khan, eloquent and unbreathed, for he had taken no part in the fight, rose to improve the occasion. He pointed out that the tribe owed every item of its present misfortune to the Blind Mullah, who had lied in every possible particular and talked them into a trap. It was undoubtedly an insult that a Bengali, the son of a Bengali, should presume to administer the Border, but that fact did not, as the Mullah pretended, herald a general time of license and lifting; and the inexplicable madness of the English had not in the least impaired their power of guarding their marches. On the contrary, the baffled and out-generalled tribe would now, just when their food-stock was lowest, be blockaded from any trade with Hindustan until they had sent hostages for good behaviour, paid compensation for disturbance, and blood-money at the rate of thirty-six English pounds per head for every villager that they might have slain. ‘And ye know that those lowland dogs will make oath that we have slain scores. Will the Mullah pay the fines or must we sell our guns?’ A low growl ran round the fires. ‘Now, seeing that all this is the Mullah’s work, and that we have gained nothing but promises of Paradise thereby, it is in my heart that we of the Khusru Kheyl lack a shrine whereat to pray. We are weakened, and henceforth how shall we dare to cross into the Madar Kheyl border, as has been our custom, to kneel to Pir Sajji’s tomb? The Madar men will fall upon us, and rightly. But our Mullah is a holy man. He has helped two score of us into Paradise this night. Let him therefore accompany his flock, and we will build over his body a dome of the blue tiles of Mooltan, and burn lamps at his feet every Friday night. He shall be a saint: we shall have a shrine; and there our women shall pray for fresh seed to fill the gaps in our fighting-tale. How think you?’

Then Khoda Dad Khan, who was articulate and hadn’t participated in the fight, stood up to seize the moment. He pointed out that the tribe owed all their current misfortunes to the Blind Mullah, who had lied about everything and led them into a trap. It was certainly an insult that a Bengali, the son of a Bengali, should presume to govern the Border, but that didn’t mean, as the Mullah claimed, that it was the start of a lawless time; the English's inexplicable madness had not weakened their ability to protect their territory at all. On the contrary, the frustrated and outsmarted tribe would now, just when their food supplies were at their lowest, be cut off from any trade with Hindustan until they sent hostages for good behavior, paid compensation for disturbances, and blood-money at the rate of thirty-six English pounds for each villager they may have killed. “And you know those lowland dogs will swear that we’ve killed dozens. Will the Mullah pay the fines or do we have to sell our guns?” A low murmur spread around the fires. “Now, since all of this is the Mullah’s doing, and all we’ve gained are empty promises of Paradise, I feel we of the Khusru Kheyl need a shrine to pray at. We are weakened, and how will we now dare to cross into Madar Kheyl territory, as has been our tradition, to kneel at Pir Sajji’s tomb? The Madar men will attack us, and rightly so. But our Mullah is a holy man. He has sent two dozen of us to Paradise tonight. Let him accompany his followers, and we will build over his body a dome of the blue tiles of Mooltan and burn lamps at his feet every Friday night. He shall be a saint; we will have a shrine; and there our women will pray for new life to fill the gaps in our fighting tales. What do you think?”

A grim chuckle followed the suggestion, and the soft wheep, wheep of unscabbarded knives followed the chuckle. It was an excellent notion, and met a long felt want of the tribe. The Mullah sprang to his feet, glaring with withered eyeballs at the drawn death he could not see, and calling down the curses of God and Mahomed on the tribe. Then began a game of blind man’s buff round and between the fires, whereof Khuruk Shah, the tribal poet, has sung in verse that will not die.

A harsh laugh came after the suggestion, followed by the soft wheep, wheep of unsheathed knives. It was a great idea and fulfilled a long-standing need of the tribe. The Mullah jumped up, glaring with his sunken eyes at the imminent danger he couldn't see, calling down the curses of God and Mahomed on the tribe. Then they started a game of blind man’s buff around the fires, which Khuruk Shah, the tribal poet, has immortalized in verse that will never fade away.

They tickled him gently under the armpit with the knife-point. He leaped aside screaming, only to feel a cold blade drawn lightly over the back of his neck, or a rifle-muzzle rubbing his beard. He called on his adherents to aid him, but most of these lay dead on the plains, for Khoda Dad Khan had been at some pains to arrange their decease. Men described to him the glories of the shrine they would build, and the little children clapping their hands cried, ‘Run, Mullah, run! There’s a man behind you!’ In the end, when the sport wearied, Khoda Dad Khan’s brother sent a knife home between his ribs. ‘Wherefore,’ said Khoda Dad Khan with charming simplicity, ‘I am now Chief of the Khusru Kheyl!’ No man gainsaid him; and they all went to sleep very stiff and sore.

They gently tickled him under the armpit with the knife-point. He jumped aside screaming, only to feel a cold blade lightly drawn over the back of his neck, or a rifle muzzle brushing against his beard. He called for his followers to help him, but most of them lay dead on the plains, since Khoda Dad Khan had gone to great lengths to arrange their deaths. Men told him about the amazing shrine they would build, and the little children clapped their hands and shouted, ‘Run, Mullah, run! There’s a man behind you!’ In the end, when the fun got old, Khoda Dad Khan's brother sent a knife straight through his ribs. ‘So,’ said Khoda Dad Khan with charming simplicity, ‘I am now Chief of the Khusru Kheyl!’ No one dared to oppose him; and they all went to sleep feeling very stiff and sore.

On the plain below Tommy Dodd was lecturing on the beauties of a cavalry charge by night, and Tallantire, bowed on his saddle, was gasping hysterically because there was a sword dangling from his wrist flecked with the blood of the Khusru Kheyl, the tribe that Orde had kept in leash so well. When a Rajpoot trooper pointed out that the skewbald’s right ear had been taken off at the root by some blind slash of its unskilled rider, Tallantire broke down altogether, and laughed and sobbed till Tommy Dodd made him lie down and rest.

On the plain below, Tommy Dodd was talking about the thrills of a cavalry charge at night, while Tallantire, hunched over on his saddle, was gasping hysterically because a sword hung from his wrist, stained with the blood of the Khusru Kheyl, the tribe that Orde had managed so well. When a Rajpoot trooper pointed out that the skewbald’s right ear had been completely sliced off by some careless blow from its unskilled rider, Tallantire lost it altogether, laughing and crying until Tommy Dodd made him lie down and rest.

‘We must wait about till the morning,’ said he. ‘I wired to the Colonel just before we left, to send a wing of the Beshaklis after us. He’ll be furious with me for monopolising the fun, though. Those beggars in the hills won’t give us any more trouble.’

‘We have to wait until morning,’ he said. ‘I texted the Colonel right before we left to send a team of the Beshaklis after us. He’ll be really mad at me for taking all the excitement, though. Those guys in the hills won’t bother us anymore.’

‘Then tell the Beshaklis to go on and see what has happened to Curbar on the canal. We must patrol the whole line of the Border. You’re quite sure, Tommy, that—that stuff was—was only the skewbald’s ear?’

‘Then tell the Beshaklis to carry on and check what happened to Curbar on the canal. We need to patrol the entire length of the Border. You’re absolutely sure, Tommy, that—that thing was—was just the skewbald’s ear?’

‘Oh, quite,’ said Tommy. ‘You just missed cutting off his head. I saw you when we went into the mess. Sleep, old man.’

‘Oh, definitely,’ said Tommy. ‘You almost decapitated him. I saw you when we walked into the mess. Get some sleep, old man.’

Noon brought two squadrons of Beshaklis and a knot of furious brother officers demanding the court-martial of Tommy Dodd for ‘spoiling the picnic,’ and a gallop across country to the canal-works where Ferris, Curbar, and Hugonin were haranguing the terror-stricken coolies on the enormity of abandoning good work and high pay, merely because half a dozen of their fellows had been cut down. The sight of a troop of the Beshaklis restored wavering confidence, and the police-hunted section of the Khusru Kheyl had the joy of watching the canal-bank humming with life as usual, while such of their men as had taken refuge in the watercourses and ravines were being driven out by the troopers. By sundown began the remorseless patrol of the Border by police and trooper, most like the cow-boys’ eternal ride round restless cattle.

Noon brought two squads of Beshaklis and a group of angry fellow officers demanding a court-martial for Tommy Dodd for ‘ruining the fun,’ and a rush across the countryside to the canal works where Ferris, Curbar, and Hugonin were lecturing the terrified workers about the seriousness of abandoning good jobs and decent pay just because a few of their colleagues had been killed. The sight of a troop of Beshaklis boosted the confidence of the uncertain, and the section of the Khusru Kheyl that was being hunted by the police was pleased to see the canal bank bustling with activity as usual, while those among them who had taken refuge in the watercourses and ravines were being forced out by the troopers. By sundown, the relentless patrol of the Border by police and troopers began, much like the cowboys’ endless ride around restless cattle.

‘Now,’ said Khoda Dad Khan to his fellows, pointing out a line of twinkling fires below, ‘ye may see how far the old order changes. After their horse will come the little devil-guns that they can drag up to the tops of the hills, and, for aught I know, to the clouds when we crown the hills. If the tribe-council thinks good, I will go to Tallantire Sahib—who loves me—and see if I can stave off at least the blockade. Do I speak for the tribe?’

‘Now,’ said Khoda Dad Khan to his companions, pointing at a line of twinkling fires below, ‘you can see how much the old order is changing. After their horses will come the little artillery pieces they can drag up to the tops of the hills, and, for all I know, to the clouds when we reach the summits. If the tribe council agrees, I’ll go to Tallantire Sahib—who likes me—and see if I can at least delay the blockade. Am I speaking for the tribe?’

‘Ay, speak for the tribe in God’s name. How those accursed fires wink! Do the English send their troops on the wire—or is this the work of the Bengali?’

‘Yeah, speak for the tribe in God’s name. How those cursed fires flicker! Do the English send their troops through the wires—or is this the work of the Bengali?’

As Khoda Dad Khan went down the hill he was delayed by an interview with a hard-pressed tribesman, which caused him to return hastily for something he had forgotten. Then, handing himself over to the two troopers who had been chasing his friend, he claimed escort to Tallantire Sahib, then with Bullows at Jumala. The Border was safe, and the time for reasons in writing had begun.

As Khoda Dad Khan descended the hill, he was held up by a meeting with a stressed-out tribesman, which made him rush back to grab something he had forgotten. Then, after turning himself in to the two soldiers who had been pursuing his friend, he requested to be escorted to Tallantire Sahib, along with Bullows at Jumala. The Border was secure, and it was time for written explanations to start.

‘Thank Heaven!’ said Bullows, ‘that the trouble came at once. Of course we can never put down the reason in black and white, but all India will understand. And it is better to have a sharp short outbreak than five years of impotent administration inside the Border. It costs less. Grish Chunder De has reported himself sick, and has been transferred to his own province without any sort of reprimand. He was strong on not having taken over the district.’

‘Thank God!’ said Bullows, ‘that the trouble came quickly. We can never explain the reason clearly, but everyone in India will get it. It’s better to have a quick, intense crisis than five years of ineffective management along the Border. It’s more cost-effective. Grish Chunder De has claimed illness and has been moved back to his own province without any reprimand. He was adamant about not taking over the district.’

‘Of course,’ said Tallantire bitterly. ‘Well, what am I supposed to have done that was wrong?’

‘Of course,’ Tallantire said bitterly. ‘So, what exactly am I supposed to have done that was wrong?’

‘Oh, you will be told that you exceeded all your powers, and should have reported, and written, and advised for three weeks until the Khusru Kheyl could really come down in force. But I don’t think the authorities will dare to make a fuss about it. They’ve had their lesson. Have you seen Curbar’s version of the affair? He can’t write a report, but he can speak the truth.’

‘Oh, you’ll be told that you went beyond your authority and should have reported, written, and advised for three weeks until the Khusru Kheyl could actually come down in force. But I don’t think the authorities will dare to make a big deal about it. They’ve learned their lesson. Have you seen Curbar’s take on the situation? He might not be able to write a report, but he can tell the truth.’

‘What’s the use of the truth? He’d much better tear up the report. I’m sick and heartbroken over it all. It was so utterly unnecessary—except in that it rid us of that Babu.’

‘What’s the point of the truth? He’d be better off throwing the report away. I’m just sick and heartbroken over it all. It was completely unnecessary—except for getting rid of that Babu.’

Entered unabashed Khoda Dad Khan, a stuffed forage-net in his hand, and the troopers behind him.

Entered confidently Khoda Dad Khan, holding a stuffed forage-net in his hand, with the troopers following behind him.

‘May you never be tired!’ said he cheerily. ‘Well, Sahibs, that was a good fight, and Naim Shah’s mother is in debt to you, Tallantire Sahib. A clean cut, they tell me, through jaw, wadded coat, and deep into the collar-bone. Well done! But I speak for the tribe. There has been a fault—a great fault. Thou knowest that I and mine, Tallantire Sahib, kept the oath we sware to Orde Sahib on the banks of the Indus.’

‘Hope you’re never worn out!’ he said cheerfully. ‘Well, everyone, that was a good fight, and Naim Shah’s mother owes you one, Tallantire Sahib. They say it was a clean cut, right through the jaw, tough coat, and deep into the collarbone. Great job! But I’m speaking for the tribe. There has been a mistake—a serious mistake. You know that I and my people, Tallantire Sahib, kept the promise we made to Orde Sahib by the banks of the Indus.’

‘As an Afghan keeps his knife—sharp on one side, blunt on the other,’ said Tallantire.

‘Just like an Afghan keeps his knife—sharp on one side, dull on the other,’ said Tallantire.

‘The better swing in the blow, then. But I speak God’s truth. Only the Blind Mullah carried the young men on the tip of his tongue, and said that there was no more Border-law because a Bengali had been sent, and we need not fear the English at all. So they came down to avenge that insult and get plunder. Ye know what befell, and how far I helped. Now five score of us are dead or wounded, and we are all shamed and sorry, and desire no further war. Moreover, that ye may better listen to us, we have taken off the head of the Blind Mullah, whose evil counsels have led us to folly. I bring it for proof,’—and he heaved on the floor the head. ‘He will give no more trouble, for I am chief now, and so I sit in a higher place at all audiences. Yet there is an offset to this head. That was another fault. One of the men found that black Bengali beast, through whom this trouble arose, wandering on horseback and weeping. Reflecting that he had caused loss of much good life, Alla Dad Khan, whom, if you choose, I will to-morrow shoot, whipped off this head, and I bring it to you to cover your shame, that ye may bury it. See, no man kept the spectacles, though they were of gold.’

‘The better swing in the blow, then. But I speak God’s truth. Only the Blind Mullah carried the young men on the tip of his tongue and said there was no more Border law because a Bengali had been sent, and we need not fear the English at all. So they came down to avenge that insult and get plunder. You know what happened and how far I helped. Now we have lost around a hundred of us, dead or wounded, and we are all ashamed and sorry, wanting no more war. Moreover, to make it easier for you to listen to us, we have taken off the head of the Blind Mullah, whose evil advice led us to this folly. I bring it as proof,’—and he dropped the head on the floor. ‘He will cause no more trouble, for I am chief now, so I sit in a higher place at all gatherings. Yet there is a counter to this head. That was another mistake. One of the men found that black Bengali beast, through whom this trouble arose, riding on horseback and crying. Reflecting that he had caused the loss of so many good lives, Alla Dad Khan, whom I will shoot tomorrow if you choose, took off this head, and I bring it to you to cover your shame, so you can bury it. See, no one kept the glasses, even though they were gold.’

Slowly rolled to Tallantire’s feet the crop-haired head of a spectacled Bengali gentleman, open-eyed, open-mouthed—the head of Terror incarnate. Bullows bent down. ‘Yet another blood-fine and a heavy one, Khoda Dad Khan, for this is the head of Debendra Nath, the man’s brother. The Babu is safe long since. All but the fools of the Khusru Kheyl know that.’

Slowly rolled to Tallantire’s feet the cropped-haired head of a spectacled Bengali gentleman, eyes wide open, mouth agape—the head of pure terror. Bullows leaned down. “Yet another hefty blood price, Khoda Dad Khan, because this is the head of Debendra Nath, the man’s brother. The Babu has been safe for a while now. Only the fools of the Khusru Kheyl don’t know that.”

‘Well, I care not for carrion. Quick meat for me. The thing was under our hills asking the road to Jumala and Alla Dad Khan showed him the road to Jehannum, being, as thou sayest, but a fool. Remains now what the Government will do to us. As to the blockade—’

'Well, I don't care for dead meat. I prefer fresh food. The thing was under our hills, asking for the road to Jumala, and Alla Dad Khan showed him the way to Jehannum, being, as you said, just a fool. Now we wait to see what the Government will do to us. As for the blockade—'

‘Who art thou, seller of dog’s flesh,’ thundered Tallantire, ‘to speak of terms and treaties? Get hence to the hills—go, and wait there starving, till it shall please the Government to call thy people out for punishment—children and fools that ye be! Count your dead, and be still. Best assured that the Government will send you a MAN!’

‘Who are you, seller of dog meat,’ shouted Tallantire, ‘to talk about terms and treaties? Get out to the hills—go, and wait there starving, until the Government decides to summon your people for punishment—children and fools that you are! Count your dead, and be quiet. Rest assured that the Government will send you a MAN!’

‘Ay,’ returned Khoda Dad Khan, ‘for we also be men.’

‘Yeah,’ replied Khoda Dad Khan, ‘because we're men too.’

As he looked Tallantire between the eyes, he added, ‘And by God, Sahib, may thou be that man!’

As he looked Tallantire in the eyes, he added, ‘And by God, Sir, may you be that man!’





WITHOUT BENEFIT OF CLERGY

     Before my Spring I garnered Autumn’s gain,
     Out of her time my field was white with grain,
       The year gave up her secrets to my woe.
     Forced and deflowered each sick season lay,
     In mystery of increase and decay;
     I saw the sunset ere men saw the day,
       Who am too wise in that I should not know.
                             BITTER WATERS.
     Before my Spring, I collected Autumn’s rewards,  
     My field was filled with grain ahead of its time,  
       The year revealed its secrets to my sorrow.  
     Stripped and exhausted, each troubled season lingered,  
     In the mystery of growth and decline;  
     I witnessed the sunset before others saw the day,  
       For I am too knowledgeable in what I should not grasp.  
                             BITTER WATERS.

I

‘But if it be a girl?’

‘But what if it's a girl?’

‘Lord of my life, it cannot be. I have prayed for so many nights, and sent gifts to Sheikh Badl’s shrine so often, that I know God will give us a son—a man-child that shall grow into a man. Think of this and be glad. My mother shall be his mother till I can take him again, and the mullah of the Pattan mosque shall cast his nativity—God send he be born in an auspicious hour!—and then, and then thou wilt never weary of me, thy slave.’

‘Lord of my life, it can't be. I've prayed for so many nights and sent gifts to Sheikh Badl’s shrine so often that I know God will give us a son—a boy who will grow into a man. Think about this and be happy. My mother will be his mother until I can take him back, and the mullah of the Pattan mosque will determine his birth chart—God willing he’s born at a lucky time!—and then, then you will never tire of me, your servant.’

‘Since when hast thou been a slave, my queen?’

‘Since when have you been a slave, my queen?’

‘Since the beginning—till this mercy came to me. How could I be sure of thy love when I knew that I had been bought with silver?’

‘Since the beginning—until this mercy came to me. How could I be sure of your love when I knew that I had been bought with silver?’

‘Nay, that was the dowry. I paid it to thy mother.’

‘No, that was the dowry. I paid it to your mother.’

‘And she has buried it, and sits upon it all day long like a hen. What talk is yours of dower! I was bought as though I had been a Lucknow dancing-girl instead of a child.’

‘And she has buried it, and sits on it all day long like a hen. What are you talking about dower! I was bought as if I were a Lucknow dancer instead of a child.’

‘Art thou sorry for the sale?’

‘Are you sorry for the sale?’

‘I have sorrowed; but to-day I am glad. Thou wilt never cease to love me now?—answer, my king.’

‘I have been sad; but today I am happy. You will never stop loving me now, will you?—answer me, my king.’

‘Never—never. No.’

"Absolutely not."

‘Not even though the mem-log—the white women of thy own blood—love thee? And remember, I have watched them driving in the evening; they are very fair.’

‘Not even though the blonde women—your own kind—love you? And remember, I've seen them out driving in the evening; they're really beautiful.’

‘I have seen fire-balloons by the hundred. I have seen the moon, and—then I saw no more fire-balloons.’

‘I’ve seen hundreds of fire balloons. I’ve seen the moon, and—then I didn’t see any more fire balloons.’

Ameera clapped her hands and laughed. ‘Very good talk,’ she said. Then with an assumption of great stateliness, ‘It is enough. Thou hast my permission to depart,—if thou wilt.’

Ameera clapped her hands and laughed. "Great speech," she said. Then, with a gesture of great importance, "That's enough. You have my permission to leave—if you want."

The man did not move. He was sitting on a low red-lacquered couch in a room furnished only with a blue and white floor-cloth, some rugs, and a very complete collection of native cushions. At his feet sat a woman of sixteen, and she was all but all the world in his eyes. By every rule and law she should have been otherwise, for he was an Englishman, and she a Mussulman’s daughter bought two years before from her mother, who, being left without money, would have sold Ameera shrieking to the Prince of Darkness if the price had been sufficient.

The man didn’t move. He was sitting on a low red-lacquered couch in a room that was just decorated with a blue and white floor cloth, some rugs, and a complete collection of native cushions. At his feet sat a sixteen-year-old girl, and to him, she was everything. By all standards and rules, she shouldn’t have been, because he was English, and she was the daughter of a Muslim who had been bought two years ago from her mother, who, having run out of money, would have sold Ameera screaming to the Prince of Darkness if the price had been right.

It was a contract entered into with a light heart; but even before the girl had reached her bloom she came to fill the greater portion of John Holden’s life. For her, and the withered hag her mother, he had taken a little house overlooking the great red-walled city, and found,—when the marigolds had sprung up by the well in the courtyard and Ameera had established herself according to her own ideas of comfort, and her mother had ceased grumbling at the inadequacy of the cooking-places, the distance from the daily market, and at matters of house-keeping in general,—that the house was to him his home. Any one could enter his bachelor’s bungalow by day or night, and the life that he led there was an unlovely one. In the house in the city his feet only could pass beyond the outer courtyard to the women’s rooms; and when the big wooden gate was bolted behind him he was king in his own territory, with Ameera for queen. And there was going to be added to this kingdom a third person whose arrival Holden felt inclined to resent. It interfered with his perfect happiness. It disarranged the orderly peace of the house that was his own. But Ameera was wild with delight at the thought of it, and her mother not less so. The love of a man, and particularly a white man, was at the best an inconstant affair, but it might, both women argued, be held fast by a baby’s hands. ‘And then,’ Ameera would always say, ‘then he will never care for the white mem-log. I hate them all—I hate them all.’

It was a contract made with a carefree attitude; but even before the girl had come into her own, she began to occupy a significant part of John Holden’s life. For her and her bitter mother, he had rented a small house overlooking the sprawling red-walled city. He realized, when the marigolds blossomed by the well in the courtyard and Ameera set up her space according to her own ideas of comfort, while her mother stopped complaining about the cooking facilities, the distance to the daily market, and general housekeeping issues—that the house had become his home. Anyone could drop by his bachelor bungalow at any time, but the life he led there wasn’t exactly glamorous. In the house in the city, he could only enter the women’s rooms from the outer courtyard; and when the large wooden gate was locked behind him, he felt like a king in his own domain, with Ameera as his queen. However, a new addition to this little kingdom was on the way, and Holden felt a bit resentful about it. It disrupted his blissful existence and disturbed the orderly peace of the house he claimed as his own. But Ameera was thrilled at the idea, and her mother felt just as excited. The love of a man, especially a white man, was, at best, an unreliable thing, but both women argued that it could be secured by the hands of a baby. “And then,” Ameera would always say, “then he will never care for the white mem-log. I hate them all—I hate them all.”

‘He will go back to his own people in time,’ said the mother; ‘but by the blessing of God that time is yet afar off.’

‘He will return to his own people eventually,’ said the mother; ‘but by the grace of God, that time is still far away.’

Holden sat silent on the couch thinking of the future, and his thoughts were not pleasant. The drawbacks of a double life are manifold. The Government, with singular care, had ordered him out of the station for a fortnight on special duty in the place of a man who was watching by the bedside of a sick wife. The verbal notification of the transfer had been edged by a cheerful remark that Holden ought to think himself lucky in being a bachelor and a free man. He came to break the news to Ameera.

Holden sat quietly on the couch, contemplating the future, and his thoughts were anything but pleasant. The downsides of living a double life are numerous. The Government had carefully assigned him out of the station for two weeks on special duty to replace a man who was keeping vigil at the bedside of his sick wife. The verbal notice of the transfer had been accompanied by a cheerful comment about how Holden should consider himself lucky to be a bachelor and a free man. He was about to break the news to Ameera.

‘It is not good,’ she said slowly, ‘but it is not all bad. There is my mother here, and no harm will come to me—unless indeed I die of pure joy. Go thou to thy work and think no troublesome thoughts. When the days are done I believe... nay, I am sure. And—and then I shall lay HIM in thy arms, and thou wilt love me for ever. The train goes to-night, at midnight is it not? Go now, and do not let thy heart be heavy by cause of me. But thou wilt not delay in returning? Thou wilt not stay on the road to talk to the bold white mem-log. Come back to me swiftly, my life.’

‘It’s not great,’ she said slowly, ‘but it’s not all bad either. My mother is here, and I won’t come to any harm—unless I die from sheer happiness. You should go to work and not worry about anything troubling. When the days are over, I believe... no, I’m sure. And then I’ll place HIM in your arms, and you’ll love me forever. The train leaves tonight, at midnight, right? Go now, and don’t let your heart be heavy because of me. But you won’t take too long to come back, will you? You won’t stop on the way to chat with that bold white mem-log. Come back to me quickly, my love.’

As he left the courtyard to reach his horse that was tethered to the gate-post, Holden spoke to the white-haired old watchman who guarded the house, and bade him under certain contingencies despatch the filled-up telegraph-form that Holden gave him. It was all that could be done, and with the sensations of a man who has attended his own funeral Holden went away by the night mail to his exile. Every hour of the day he dreaded the arrival of the telegram, and every hour of the night he pictured to himself the death of Ameera. In consequence his work for the State was not of first-rate quality, nor was his temper towards his colleagues of the most amiable. The fortnight ended without a sign from his home, and, torn to pieces by his anxieties, Holden returned to be swallowed up for two precious hours by a dinner at the club, wherein he heard, as a man hears in a swoon, voices telling him how execrably he had performed the other man’s duties, and how he had endeared himself to all his associates. Then he fled on horseback through the night with his heart in his mouth. There was no answer at first to his blows on the gate, and he had just wheeled his horse round to kick it in when Pir Khan appeared with a lantern and held his stirrup.

As he left the courtyard to get to his horse tied to the gate-post, Holden talked to the old watchman with white hair who guarded the house and asked him, under certain circumstances, to send the completed telegraph form that Holden gave him. That was all he could do, and feeling like a man who’s just attended his own funeral, Holden took the night train to his exile. Every hour of the day, he dreaded the arrival of the telegram, and every hour of the night, he imagined Ameera's death. As a result, his work for the State wasn’t of top quality, and his mood towards his colleagues wasn’t the friendliest. The two weeks went by without any news from home, and overwhelmed by worry, Holden managed to escape for two precious hours at dinner at the club, where he heard, as if in a daze, voices telling him how poorly he had handled the other man's duties and how he had alienated his coworkers. Then, he rushed away on horseback through the night, his heart racing. At first, there was no response to his knocks on the gate, and just as he was about to turn his horse around to kick it in, Pir Khan appeared with a lantern and held his stirrup.

‘Has aught occurred?’ said Holden.

"Has anything happened?" said Holden.

‘The news does not come from my mouth, Protector of the Poor, but—’ He held out his shaking hand as befitted the bearer of good news who is entitled to a reward.

‘The news isn't coming from me, Protector of the Poor, but—’ He extended his trembling hand like a messenger of good news expecting a reward.

Holden hurried through the courtyard. A light burned in the upper room. His horse neighed in the gateway, and he heard a shrill little wail that sent all the blood into the apple of his throat. It was a new voice, but it did not prove that Ameera was alive.

Holden rushed through the courtyard. A light was on in the upper room. His horse neighed at the gate, and he heard a sharp little cry that made his throat tighten. It was a new sound, but it didn't confirm that Ameera was alive.

‘Who is there?’ he called up the narrow brick staircase.

‘Who’s there?’ he called up the narrow brick staircase.

There was a cry of delight from Ameera, and then the voice of the mother, tremulous with old age and pride—‘We be two women and—the—man—thy—son.’

There was a shout of joy from Ameera, and then the voice of the mother, shaking with age and pride—‘We are two women and—the—man—your—son.’

On the threshold of the room Holden stepped on a naked dagger, that was laid there to avert ill-luck, and it broke at the hilt under his impatient heel.

On the edge of the room, Holden stepped on a bare dagger that was placed there to ward off bad luck, and it snapped at the hilt under his eager heel.

‘God is great!’ cooed Ameera in the half-light. ‘Thou hast taken his misfortunes on thy head.’

‘God is great!’ cooed Ameera in the dim light. ‘You have taken his misfortunes on your shoulders.’

‘Ay, but how is it with thee, life of my life? Old woman, how is it with her?’

‘Hey, but how are you, my everything? Old woman, how is she doing?’

‘She has forgotten her sufferings for joy that the child is born. There is no harm; but speak softly,’ said the mother.

‘She has forgotten her pain because she’s joyful that the child is born. It’s okay; just speak softly,’ said the mother.

‘It only needed thy presence to make me all well,’ said Ameera. ‘My king, thou hast been very long away. What gifts hast thou for me? Ah, ah! It is I that bring gifts this time. Look, my life, look. Was there ever such a babe? Nay, I am too weak even to clear my arm from him.’

‘All I needed was you here to feel better,’ said Ameera. ‘My king, you’ve been away for a long time. What presents do you have for me? Oh, wait! I’m the one bringing gifts this time. Look, my love, look. Have you ever seen such a baby? No, I’m too weak to even move my arm away from him.’

‘Rest then, and do not talk. I am here, bachari [little woman].’

‘Rest now, and don’t talk. I’m here, little one.’

‘Well said, for there is a bond and a heel-rope [peecharee] between us now that nothing can break. Look—canst thou see in this light? He is without spot or blemish. Never was such a man-child. Ya illah! he shall be a pundit—no, a trooper of the Queen. And, my life, dost thou love me as well as ever, though I am faint and sick and worn? Answer truly.’

‘Well said, because there’s a connection and a bond between us now that nothing can break. Look—can you see in this light? He is perfect. Never has there been such a boy. Oh my God! He will be a scholar—no, a soldier for the Queen. And, my dear, do you love me as much as ever, even though I’m weak and sick and exhausted? Answer honestly.’

‘Yea. I love as I have loved, with all my soul. Lie still, pearl, and rest.’

‘Yeah. I love as I have loved, with all my soul. Lie still, pearl, and rest.’

‘Then do not go. Sit by my side here—so. Mother, the lord of this house needs a cushion. Bring it.’ There was an almost imperceptible movement on the part of the new life that lay in the hollow of Ameera’s arm. ‘Aho!’ she said, her voice breaking with love. ‘The babe is a champion from his birth. He is kicking me in the side with mighty kicks. Was there ever such a babe! And he is ours to us—thine and mine. Put thy hand on his head, but carefully, for he is very young, and men are unskilled in such matters.’

‘Then don’t go. Sit by my side here—like this. Mother, the lord of this house needs a cushion. Bring it.’ There was a nearly invisible movement from the new life that lay in the bend of Ameera’s arm. ‘Oh!’ she said, her voice filled with love. ‘The baby is a champion from birth. He’s kicking me in the side with strong kicks. Has there ever been such a baby! And he is ours—yours and mine. Place your hand on his head, but be gentle, as he is very young, and men aren’t used to handling things like this.’

Very cautiously Holden touched with the tips of his fingers the downy head.

Very carefully, Holden touched the soft head with the tips of his fingers.

‘He is of the faith,’ said Ameera; ‘for lying here in the night-watches I whispered the call to prayer and the profession of faith into his ears. And it is most marvellous that he was born upon a Friday, as I was born. Be careful of him, my life; but he can almost grip with his hands.’

‘He is of the faith,’ said Ameera; ‘because while lying here during the night, I whispered the call to prayer and the declaration of faith into his ears. And it’s quite amazing that he was born on a Friday, just like me. Take care of him, my love; but he can almost hold on with his hands.’

Holden found one helpless little hand that closed feebly on his finger. And the clutch ran through his body till it settled about his heart. Till then his sole thought had been for Ameera. He began to realise that there was some one else in the world, but he could not feel that it was a veritable son with a soul. He sat down to think, and Ameera dozed lightly.

Holden found one tiny hand that weakly grasped his finger. And that grip traveled through him until it settled around his heart. Until that moment, he had only been focused on Ameera. He started to realize that there was someone else in the world, but he couldn’t quite feel that it was a true son with a soul. He sat down to think, while Ameera dozed lightly.

‘Get hence, sahib,’ said her mother under her breath. ‘It is not good that she should find you here on waking. She must be still.’

‘Get out of here, sir,’ her mother said quietly. ‘It's not good for her to find you here when she wakes up. She needs to be calm.’

‘I go,’ said Holden submissively. ‘Here be rupees. See that my baba gets fat and finds all that he needs.’

‘I’ll go,’ said Holden obediently. ‘Here are the rupees. Make sure my baba gets enough food and has everything he needs.’

The chink of the silver roused Ameera. ‘I am his mother, and no hireling,’ she said weakly. ‘Shall I look to him more or less for the sake of money? Mother, give it back. I have born my lord a son.’

The clink of the silver woke Ameera. ‘I am his mother, not a hired hand,’ she said weakly. ‘Should I care for him more or less just for money? Mother, give it back. I have given my lord a son.’

The deep sleep of weakness came upon her almost before the sentence was completed. Holden went down to the courtyard very softly with his heart at ease. Pir Khan, the old watchman, was chuckling with delight. ‘This house is now complete,’ he said, and without further comment thrust into Holden’s hands the hilt of a sabre worn many years ago when he, Pir Khan, served the Queen in the police. The bleat of a tethered goat came from the well-kerb.

The deep sleep of exhaustion hit her almost as soon as the sentence was finished. Holden quietly made his way to the courtyard, feeling at peace. Pir Khan, the old watchman, was grinning with joy. "This house is now whole," he said, and without saying anything more, handed Holden the hilt of a saber he had carried many years ago when he, Pir Khan, served the Queen in the police. The bleating of a tied-up goat could be heard from the well edge.

‘There be two,’ said Pir Khan, ‘two goats of the best. I bought them, and they cost much money; and since there is no birth-party assembled their flesh will be all mine. Strike craftily, sahib! ‘Tis an ill-balanced sabre at the best. Wait till they raise their heads from cropping the marigolds.’

‘There are two,’ said Pir Khan, ‘two of the best goats. I bought them, and they cost a lot; and since there’s no birth-party gathered, their meat will be all mine. Be clever, sir! It’s a poorly balanced sword at best. Wait until they lift their heads from munching on the marigolds.’

‘And why?’ said Holden, bewildered.

"Why?" Holden said, confused.

‘For the birth-sacrifice. What else? Otherwise the child being unguarded from fate may die. The Protector of the Poor knows the fitting words to be said.’

‘For the birth sacrifice. What else? Otherwise, the child, without protection from fate, could die. The Protector of the Poor knows the right words to say.’

Holden had learned them once with little thought that he would ever speak them in earnest. The touch of the cold sabre-hilt in his palm turned suddenly to the clinging grip of the child upstairs—the child that was his own son—and a dread of loss filled him.

Holden had learned them once without really thinking he would ever say them for real. The cold feel of the sword's hilt in his hand suddenly shifted to the tight hold of the child upstairs—the child that was his own son—and a deep fear of losing him overwhelmed him.

‘Strike!’ said Pir Khan. ‘Never life came into the world but life was paid for it. See, the goats have raised their heads. Now! With a drawing cut!’

‘Strike!’ said Pir Khan. ‘Life has always come at a cost. Look, the goats have lifted their heads. Now! With a swift cut!’

Hardly knowing what he did Holden cut twice as he muttered the Mahomedan prayer that runs: ‘Almighty! In place of this my son I offer life for life, blood for blood, head for head, bone for bone, hair for hair, skin for skin.’ The waiting horse snorted and bounded in his pickets at the smell of the raw blood that spirted over Holden’s riding-boots.

Hardly aware of what he was doing, Holden cut twice as he whispered the Muslim prayer that goes: ‘Almighty! In place of this my son, I offer life for life, blood for blood, head for head, bone for bone, hair for hair, skin for skin.’ The horse waiting nearby snorted and jumped in its ties at the scent of the fresh blood that splattered over Holden’s riding boots.

‘Well smitten!’ said Pir Khan, wiping the sabre. ‘A swordsman was lost in thee. Go with a light heart, Heaven-born. I am thy servant, and the servant of thy son. May the Presence live a thousand years and... the flesh of the goats is all mine?’ Pir Khan drew back richer by a month’s pay. Holden swung himself into the saddle and rode off through the low-hanging wood-smoke of the evening. He was full of riotous exultation, alternating with a vast vague tenderness directed towards no particular object, that made him choke as he bent over the neck of his uneasy horse. ‘I never felt like this in my life,’ he thought. ‘I’ll go to the club and pull myself together.’

‘Well done!’ said Pir Khan, cleaning the sabre. ‘There was a true swordsman in you. Go with a light heart, Heaven-born. I am your servant, and your son's servant too. May you live a thousand years and... all the goat meat is mine?’ Pir Khan stepped back, feeling a month’s pay richer. Holden mounted his horse and rode off through the evening smoke of the woods. He was filled with wild excitement, mixed with a deep, vague tenderness aimed at nothing specific, which made him choke as he leaned over his restless horse's neck. ‘I’ve never felt like this in my life,’ he thought. ‘I’ll head to the club and get myself together.’

A game of pool was beginning, and the room was full of men. Holden entered, eager to get to the light and the company of his fellows, singing at the top of his voice—

A game of pool was starting, and the room was packed with men. Holden walked in, excited to reach the light and be with his friends, singing loudly—

    In Baltimore a-walking, a lady I did meet!
In Baltimore, while walking, I met a lady!

‘Did you?’ said the club-secretary from his corner. ‘Did she happen to tell you that your boots were wringing wet? Great goodness, man, it’s blood!’

‘Did you?’ said the club secretary from his corner. ‘Did she mention that your boots were soaking wet? Good grief, man, it’s blood!’

‘Bosh!’ said Holden, picking his cue from the rack. ‘May I cut in? It’s dew. I’ve been riding through high crops. My faith! my boots are in a mess though!

‘Nonsense!’ said Holden, taking his cue from the rack. ‘Mind if I join in? It’s early morning. I’ve been riding through tall crops. Wow! my boots are a total mess though!

    ‘And if it be a girl she shall wear a wedding-ring,
     And if it be a boy he shall fight for his king,
     With his dirk, and his cap, and his little jacket blue,
     He shall walk the quarter-deck—’ 
‘And if it's a girl, she'll wear a wedding ring,  
And if it's a boy, he'll fight for his king,  
With his dagger, and his hat, and his little blue jacket,  
He'll walk the quarter-deck—’

‘Yellow on blue—green next player,’ said the marker monotonously.

‘Yellow on blue—green next player,’ said the marker in a flat tone.

‘He shall walk the quarter-deck,—Am I green, marker? He shall walk the quarter-deck,—eh! that’s a bad shot,—As his daddy used to do!’

‘He will walk the quarter-deck,—Am I being naive, marker? He will walk the quarter-deck,—eh! that’s a poor take,—Just like his dad used to do!’

‘I don’t see that you have anything to crow about,’ said a zealous junior civilian acidly. ‘The Government is not exactly pleased with your work when you relieved Sanders.’

‘I don’t think you have anything to brag about,’ said an eager junior civilian sarcastically. ‘The Government isn’t exactly happy with what you did when you took over for Sanders.’

‘Does that mean a wigging from headquarters?’ said Holden with an abstracted smile. ‘I think I can stand it.’

‘Does that mean a reprimand from headquarters?’ said Holden with a distracted smile. ‘I think I can handle it.’

The talk beat up round the ever-fresh subject of each man’s work, and steadied Holden till it was time to go to his dark empty bungalow, where his butler received him as one who knew all his affairs. Holden remained awake for the greater part of the night, and his dreams were pleasant ones.

The conversation revolved around the always-relevant topic of each person’s job, which helped calm Holden until it was time to return to his dark, empty bungalow, where his butler greeted him like someone who was aware of all his business. Holden stayed awake for most of the night, and his dreams were enjoyable ones.

II

‘How old is he now?’

‘How old is he now?’

‘Ya illah! What a man’s question! He is all but six weeks old; and on this night I go up to the housetop with thee, my life, to count the stars. For that is auspicious. And he was born on a Friday under the sign of the Sun, and it has been told to me that he will outlive us both and get wealth. Can we wish for aught better, beloved?’

‘Oh my God! What a man’s question! He is barely six weeks old; and tonight I’m going up to the rooftop with you, my love, to count the stars. That’s a good sign. He was born on a Friday under the sign of the Sun, and I’ve been told that he will outlive us both and become wealthy. Can we wish for anything better, my dear?’

‘There is nothing better. Let us go up to the roof, and thou shalt count the stars—but a few only, for the sky is heavy with cloud.’

‘There’s nothing better. Let’s go up to the roof, and you can count the stars—but only a few, because the sky is thick with clouds.’

‘The winter rains are late, and maybe they come out of season. Come, before all the stars are hid. I have put on my richest jewels.’

‘The winter rains are late, and maybe they come at the wrong time. Come, before all the stars are hidden. I've put on my finest jewels.’

‘Thou hast forgotten the best of all.’

‘You have forgotten the best of all.’

‘Ai! Ours. He comes also. He has never yet seen the skies.’

‘Oh no! He's here too. He's never seen the sky before.’

Ameera climbed the narrow staircase that led to the flat roof. The child, placid and unwinking, lay in the hollow of her right arm, gorgeous in silver-fringed muslin with a small skull-cap on his head. Ameera wore all that she valued most. The diamond nose-stud that takes the place of the Western patch in drawing attention to the curve of the nostril, the gold ornament in the centre of the forehead studded with tallow-drop emeralds and flawed rubies, the heavy circlet of beaten gold that was fastened round her neck by the softness of the pure metal, and the chinking curb-patterned silver anklets hanging low over the rosy ankle-bone. She was dressed in jade-green muslin as befitted a daughter of the Faith, and from shoulder to elbow and elbow to wrist ran bracelets of silver tied with floss silk, frail glass bangles slipped over the wrist in proof of the slenderness of the hand, and certain heavy gold bracelets that had no part in her country’s ornaments but, since they were Holden’s gift and fastened with a cunning European snap, delighted her immensely.

Ameera climbed the narrow staircase that led to the flat roof. The child, calm and unblinking, lay in the crook of her right arm, beautiful in silver-fringed muslin with a small skullcap on his head. Ameera wore all her most prized possessions. The diamond nose stud that draws attention to the curve of her nostril, the gold ornament in the center of her forehead set with glistening emeralds and imperfect rubies, the heavy gold necklace that hugged her neck with the softness of pure metal, and the jingling silver anklets that hung low over her rosy ankle bone. She was dressed in jade-green muslin, fitting for a daughter of the Faith, and from her shoulder to her elbow and from elbow to wrist were bracelets of silver tied with fine silk, delicate glass bangles slipped over her wrist to show off the slenderness of her hand, and a few heavy gold bracelets that weren’t part of her country’s traditional jewelry but, since they were Holden's gift and secured with a clever European clasp, made her very happy.

They sat down by the low white parapet of the roof, overlooking the city and its lights.

They sat down by the low white wall of the roof, looking out over the city and its lights.

‘They are happy down there,’ said Ameera. ‘But I do not think that they are as happy as we. Nor do I think the white mem-log are as happy. And thou?’

‘They're happy down there,’ said Ameera. ‘But I don't think they're as happy as we are. Nor do I think the white ladies are as happy. And you?’

‘I know they are not.’

"I know they're not."

‘How dost thou know?’

‘How do you know?’

‘They give their children over to the nurses.’

‘They hand their children over to the nurses.’

‘I have never seen that,’ said Ameera with a sigh, ‘nor do I wish to see. Ahi!—she dropped her head on Holden’s shoulder,—‘I have counted forty stars, and I am tired. Look at the child, love of my life, he is counting too.’

‘I have never seen that,’ Ameera sighed, ‘and I don’t want to see it. Ahi!—she rested her head on Holden’s shoulder,—‘I have counted forty stars, and I’m tired. Look at the child, love of my life, he’s counting too.’

The baby was staring with round eyes at the dark of the heavens. Ameera placed him in Holden’s arms, and he lay there without a cry.

The baby was staring wide-eyed at the dark sky. Ameera put him in Holden’s arms, and he lay there without making a sound.

‘What shall we call him among ourselves?’ she said. ‘Look! Art thou ever tired of looking? He carries thy very eyes. But the mouth—’

‘What should we call him among ourselves?’ she said. ‘Look! Are you ever tired of looking? He has your exact eyes. But the mouth—’

‘Is thine, most dear. Who should know better than I?’

‘It’s yours, my dear. Who would know better than I?’

‘’Tis such a feeble mouth. Oh, so small! And yet it holds my heart between its lips. Give him to me now. He has been too long away.’

‘It’s such a tiny mouth. Oh, so small! And yet it holds my heart between its lips. Give him to me now. He has been away for too long.’

‘Nay, let him lie; he has not yet begun to cry.’

‘No, let him lie there; he hasn’t started crying yet.’

‘When he cries thou wilt give him back—eh? What a man of mankind thou art! If he cried he were only the dearer to me. But, my life, what little name shall we give him?’

‘When he cries you'll give him back—right? What a guy you are! If he cried, it would just make me love him even more. But, my dear, what little name should we give him?’

The small body lay close to Holden’s heart. It was utterly helpless and very soft. He scarcely dared to breathe for fear of crushing it. The caged green parrot that is regarded as a sort of guardian-spirit in most native households moved on its perch and fluttered a drowsy wing.

The small body lay close to Holden’s heart. It was completely helpless and very soft. He barely dared to breathe for fear of crushing it. The caged green parrot, which is seen as a kind of guardian spirit in most native households, shifted on its perch and fluttered a sleepy wing.

‘There is the answer,’ said Holden. ‘Mian Mittu has spoken. He shall be the parrot. When he is ready he will talk mightily and run about. Mian Mittu is the parrot in thy—in the Mussulman tongue, is it not?’

‘There’s the answer,’ said Holden. ‘Mian Mittu has spoken. He will be the parrot. When he’s ready, he will talk a lot and run around. Mian Mittu is the parrot in your—in the Muslim language, right?’

‘Why put me so far off?’ said Ameera fretfully. ‘Let it be like unto some English name—but not wholly. For he is mine.’

‘Why put me so far away?’ said Ameera annoyed. ‘Make it something like an English name—but not exactly. Because he belongs to me.’

‘Then call him Tota, for that is likest English.’

‘Then call him Tota, because that sounds the most like English.’

‘Ay, Tota, and that is still the parrot. Forgive me, my lord, for a minute ago, but in truth he is too little to wear all the weight of Mian Mittu for name. He shall be Tota—our Tota to us. Hearest thou, O small one? Littlest, thou art Tota.’ She touched the child’s cheek, and he waking wailed, and it was necessary to return him to his mother, who soothed him with the wonderful rhyme of Are koko, Jare koko! which says:

‘Yes, Tota, and that’s still the parrot. I’m sorry, my lord, for a moment ago, but honestly, he’s too small to carry the weight of the name Mian Mittu. He will be Tota—our Tota. Do you hear me, little one? Smallest, you are Tota.’ She touched the child’s cheek, and he woke up crying, so they had to return him to his mother, who comforted him with the lovely rhyme of Are koko, Jare koko! which says:

     Oh crow! Go crow! Baby’s sleeping sound,
     And the wild plums grow in the jungle, only a penny a pound.
     Only a penny a pound, baba, only a penny a pound.
     Oh crow! Go crow! Baby’s sleeping peacefully,  
     And the wild plums grow in the jungle, just a penny a pound.  
     Just a penny a pound, baba, just a penny a pound.  

Reassured many times as to the price of those plums, Tota cuddled himself down to sleep. The two sleek, white well-bullocks in the courtyard were steadily chewing the cud of their evening meal; old Pir Khan squatted at the head of Holden’s horse, his police sabre across his knees, pulling drowsily at a big water-pipe that croaked like a bull-frog in a pond. Ameera’s mother sat spinning in the lower verandah, and the wooden gate was shut and barred. The music of a marriage-procession came to the roof above the gentle hum of the city, and a string of flying-foxes crossed the face of the low moon.

Reassured multiple times about the price of those plums, Tota snuggled down to sleep. The two sleek, white oxen in the courtyard were steadily chewing their evening meal; old Pir Khan sat at the head of Holden’s horse, his police sword resting across his knees, lazily puffing on a big water-pipe that croaked like a bullfrog in a pond. Ameera’s mother was spinning in the lower veranda, and the wooden gate was shut and locked. The sounds of a wedding procession drifted up to the roof above the gentle hum of the city, and a group of flying foxes crossed the face of the low moon.

‘I have prayed,’ said Ameera after a long pause, ‘I have prayed for two things. First, that I may die in thy stead if thy death is demanded, and in the second that I may die in the place of the child. I have prayed to the Prophet and to Beebee Miriam [the Virgin Mary]. Thinkest thou either will hear?’

‘I have prayed,’ said Ameera after a long pause, ‘I have prayed for two things. First, that I may die in your place if your death is required, and second, that I may die instead of the child. I have prayed to the Prophet and to Beebee Miriam [the Virgin Mary]. Do you think either will listen?’

‘From thy lips who would not hear the lightest word?’

‘Who wouldn’t want to hear even the smallest word from your lips?’

‘I asked for straight talk, and thou hast given me sweet talk. Will my prayers be heard?’

‘I asked for straight talk, and you’ve given me sweet talk. Will my prayers be heard?’

‘How can I say? God is very good.’

‘How can I put this? God is really good.’

‘Of that I am not sure. Listen now. When I die, or the child dies, what is thy fate? Living, thou wilt return to the bold white mem-log, for kind calls to kind.’

‘I'm not sure about that. Listen now. When I die, or if the child dies, what happens to you? While you're alive, you'll go back to the bold white mem-log, because kind calls to kind.’

‘Not always.’

‘Not always.’

‘With a woman, no; with a man it is otherwise. Thou wilt in this life, later on, go back to thine own folk. That I could almost endure, for I should be dead. But in thy very death thou wilt be taken away to a strange place and a paradise that I do not know.’

‘With a woman, no; with a man it’s different. You will, in this life, later return to your own people. I could almost accept that, because I would be dead. But even in your death, you will be taken to a strange place and a paradise that I don’t know.’

‘Will it be paradise?’

"Will it be heaven?"

‘Surely, for who would harm thee? But we two—I and the child—shall be elsewhere, and we cannot come to thee, nor canst thou come to us. In the old days, before the child was born, I did not think of these things; but now I think of them always. It is very hard talk.’

‘Surely, who would hurt you? But the child and I will be somewhere else, and we can't come to you, nor can you come to us. In the old days, before the child was born, I didn't think about these things; but now I think about them all the time. It's a really tough conversation.’

‘It will fall as it will fall. To-morrow we do not know, but to-day and love we know well. Surely we are happy now.’

‘It will happen as it happens. Tomorrow is uncertain, but today and love are clear. We are definitely happy right now.’

‘So happy that it were well to make our happiness assured. And thy Beebee Miriam should listen to me; for she is also a woman. But then she would envy me! It is not seemly for men to worship a woman.’

‘So happy that it would be good to secure our happiness. And your Beebee Miriam should listen to me, as she is a woman too. But then she might envy me! It’s not appropriate for men to worship a woman.’

Holden laughed aloud at Ameera’s little spasm of jealousy.

Holden burst out laughing at Ameera’s small fit of jealousy.

‘Is it not seemly? Why didst thou not turn me from worship of thee, then?’

‘Isn't it appropriate? Why didn't you stop me from worshipping you, then?’

‘Thou a worshipper! And of me? My king, for all thy sweet words, well I know that I am thy servant and thy slave, and the dust under thy feet. And I would not have it otherwise. See!’

‘You a worshiper! And of me? My king, for all your sweet words, I know well that I am your servant and your slave, and the dust under your feet. And I wouldn’t want it any other way. Look!’

Before Holden could prevent her she stooped forward and touched his feet; recovering herself with a little laugh she hugged Tota closer to her bosom. Then, almost savagely—

Before Holden could stop her, she bent down and touched his feet; regaining her composure with a small laugh, she hugged Tota closer to her chest. Then, almost aggressively—

‘Is it true that the bold white mem-log live for three times the length of my life? Is it true that they make their marriages not before they are old women?’

‘Is it true that the bold white mem-log live for three times as long as I do? Is it true that they don’t get married until they’re old women?’

‘They marry as do others—when they are women.’

‘They marry like everyone else—when they are women.’

‘That I know, but they wed when they are twenty-five. Is that true?’

‘I know that, but they get married when they’re twenty-five. Is that true?’

‘That is true.’

"That's true."

‘Ya illah! At twenty-five! Who would of his own will take a wife even of eighteen? She is a woman—aging every hour. Twenty-five! I shall be an old woman at that age, and—Those mem-log remain young for ever. How I hate them!’ ‘What have they to do with us?’

‘Oh my God! At twenty-five! Who would willingly take a wife even at eighteen? She is a woman—getting older by the minute. Twenty-five! I’ll be an old woman by then, and—Those guys stay young forever. How I despise them!’ ‘What do they have to do with us?’

‘I cannot tell. I know only that there may now be alive on this earth a woman ten years older than I who may come to thee and take thy love ten years after I am an old woman, gray-headed, and the nurse of Tota’s son. That is unjust and evil. They should die too.’

‘I can't say. All I know is that there might be a woman out there, ten years older than me, who could come to you and take your love ten years after I've become an old woman, gray-haired and caring for Tota's son. That's unfair and wrong. They should die too.’

‘Now, for all thy years thou art a child, and shalt be picked up and carried down the staircase.’

‘Now, for all your years, you are still a child and will be picked up and carried down the stairs.’

‘Tota! Have a care for Tota, my lord! Thou at least art as foolish as any babe!’ Ameera tucked Tota out of harm’s way in the hollow of her neck, and was carried downstairs laughing in Holden’s arms, while Tota opened his eyes and smiled after the manner of the lesser angels.

‘Tota! Be careful with Tota, my lord! You’re just as foolish as any baby!’ Ameera tucked Tota safely in the crook of her neck and was carried downstairs laughing in Holden’s arms, while Tota opened his eyes and smiled like the lesser angels.

He was a silent infant, and, almost before Holden could realise that he was in the world, developed into a small gold-coloured little god and unquestioned despot of the house overlooking the city. Those were months of absolute happiness to Holden and Ameera—happiness withdrawn from the world, shut in behind the wooden gate that Pir Khan guarded. By day Holden did his work with an immense pity for such as were not so fortunate as himself, and a sympathy for small children that amazed and amused many mothers at the little station-gatherings. At nightfall he returned to Ameera,—Ameera, full of the wondrous doings of Tota; how he had been seen to clap his hands together and move his fingers with intention and purpose—which was manifestly a miracle—how later, he had of his own initiative crawled out of his low bedstead on to the floor and swayed on both feet for the space of three breaths.

He was a quiet baby, and almost before Holden realized he was in the world, he transformed into a small gold-colored little god and the unquestioned ruler of the house overlooking the city. Those were months of pure happiness for Holden and Ameera—happiness isolated from the outside world, securely behind the wooden gate that Pir Khan guarded. During the day, Holden worked with a deep sense of compassion for those who weren’t as fortunate as he was, and his sympathy for young children surprised and entertained many mothers at the little station gatherings. When night fell, he would return to Ameera—Ameera, excitedly sharing the amazing things Tota had done; how he had been seen clapping his hands and moving his fingers with intent—which was clearly a miracle—how later, he had crawled out of his low bed onto the floor and swayed on both feet for the duration of three breaths.

‘And they were long breaths, for my heart stood still with delight,’ said Ameera.

‘And they were long breaths, for my heart stopped with joy,’ said Ameera.

Then Tota took the beasts into his councils—the well-bullocks, the little gray squirrels, the mongoose that lived in a hole near the well, and especially Mian Mittu, the parrot, whose tail he grievously pulled, and Mian Mittu screamed till Ameera and Holden arrived.

Then Tota gathered the animals for his meetings—the strong bulls, the small gray squirrels, the mongoose that lived in a hole by the well, and especially Mian Mittu, the parrot, whose tail he pulled hard, causing Mian Mittu to scream until Ameera and Holden showed up.

‘O villain! Child of strength! This to thy brother on the house-top! Tobah, tobah! Fie! Fie! But I know a charm to make him wise as Suleiman and Aflatoun [Solomon and Plato]. Now look,’ said Ameera. She drew from an embroidered bag a handful of almonds. ‘See! we count seven. In the name of God!’

‘Oh villain! Child of strength! This is for your brother on the rooftop! Tobah, tobah! Shame! Shame! But I know a trick to make him as wise as Solomon and Plato. Now look,’ said Ameera. She pulled out a handful of almonds from an embroidered bag. ‘See! We count seven. In the name of God!’

She placed Mian Mittu, very angry and rumpled, on the top of his cage, and seating herself between the babe and the bird she cracked and peeled an almond less white than her teeth. ‘This is a true charm, my life, and do not laugh. See! I give the parrot one half and Tota the other.’ Mian Mittu with careful beak took his share from between Ameera’s lips, and she kissed the other half into the mouth of the child, who ate it slowly with wondering eyes. ‘This I will do each day of seven, and without doubt he who is ours will be a bold speaker and wise. Eh, Tota, what wilt thou be when thou art a man and I am gray-headed?’ Tota tucked his fat legs into adorable creases. He could crawl, but he was not going to waste the spring of his youth in idle speech. He wanted Mian Mittu’s tail to tweak.

She put Mian Mittu, looking really angry and messy, on top of his cage, and sitting between the baby and the bird, she cracked and peeled an almond that was less white than her teeth. "This is a real charm, my dear, so don’t laugh. Look! I’ll give the parrot one half and Tota the other.” Mian Mittu carefully took his piece from between Ameera’s lips, and she kissed the other half into the child’s mouth, who ate it slowly with curious eyes. “I’ll do this every day for a week, and I’m sure whoever belongs to us will be a bold speaker and wise. Hey, Tota, what do you want to be when you grow up and I’m gray-headed?” Tota tucked his chunky legs into cute little folds. He could crawl, but he wasn’t going to waste the energy of his youth on idle talk. He wanted to tug on Mian Mittu’s tail.

When he was advanced to the dignity of a silver belt—which, with a magic square engraved on silver and hung round his neck, made up the greater part of his clothing—he staggered on a perilous journey down the garden to Pir Khan and proffered him all his jewels in exchange for one little ride on Holden’s horse, having seen his mother’s mother chaffering with pedlars in the verandah. Pir Khan wept and set the untried feet on his own gray head in sign of fealty, and brought the bold adventurer to his mother’s arms, vowing that Tota would be a leader of men ere his beard was grown.

When he was promoted to the honor of wearing a silver belt—which, along with a magic square engraved on silver that hung around his neck, made up most of his attire—he stumbled on a risky journey through the garden to Pir Khan and offered him all his jewels in exchange for a small ride on Holden’s horse, having seen his grandmother bargaining with peddlers on the porch. Pir Khan cried and placed the untested feet on his own gray head as a sign of loyalty, and brought the brave adventurer to his mother’s arms, promising that Tota would become a leader of men before he even grew a beard.

One hot evening, while he sat on the roof between his father and mother watching the never-ending warfare of the kites that the city boys flew, he demanded a kite of his own with Pir Khan to fly it, because he had a fear of dealing with anything larger than himself, and when Holden called him a ‘spark,’ he rose to his feet and answered slowly in defence of his new-found individuality, ‘Hum’park nahin hai. Hum admi hai [I am no spark, but a man].’

One hot evening, as he sat on the roof between his dad and mom watching the endless battle of the kites flown by the city boys, he asked for a kite of his own to fly with Pir Khan because he was afraid of handling anything bigger than himself. When Holden called him a ‘spark,’ he stood up and replied slowly in defense of his new-found individuality, ‘Hum’park nahin hai. Hum admi hai [I am no spark, but a man].’

The protest made Holden choke and devote himself very seriously to a consideration of Tota’s future. He need hardly have taken the trouble. The delight of that life was too perfect to endure. Therefore it was taken away as many things are taken away in India—suddenly and without warning. The little lord of the house, as Pir Khan called him, grew sorrowful and complained of pains who had never known the meaning of pain. Ameera, wild with terror, watched him through the night, and in the dawning of the second day the life was shaken out of him by fever—the seasonal autumn fever. It seemed altogether impossible that he could die, and neither Ameera nor Holden at first believed the evidence of the little body on the bedstead. Then Ameera beat her head against the wall and would have flung herself down the well in the garden had Holden not restrained her by main force.

The protest made Holden choke and seriously think about Tota’s future. He hardly needed to bother. The joy of that life was too perfect to last. So it was taken away, like many things in India—suddenly and without warning. The little lord of the house, as Pir Khan called him, grew sad and complained of pains, even though he had never known what pain was. Ameera, frantic with fear, watched him through the night, and as dawn broke on the second day, the fever—the seasonal autumn fever—shook the life out of him. It seemed completely impossible that he could die, and neither Ameera nor Holden initially believed the small body on the bed. Then Ameera hit her head against the wall and would have thrown herself down the well in the garden if Holden hadn't held her back with all his strength.

One mercy only was granted to Holden. He rode to his office in broad daylight and found waiting him an unusually heavy mail that demanded concentrated attention and hard work. He was not, however, alive to this kindness of the gods.

One mercy only was granted to Holden. He rode to his office in broad daylight and found an unusually heavy mail waiting for him that required focused attention and hard work. He was not, however, aware of this kindness from the universe.

III

The first shock of a bullet is no more than a brisk pinch. The wrecked body does not send in its protest to the soul till ten or fifteen seconds later. Holden realised his pain slowly, exactly as he had realised his happiness, and with the same imperious necessity for hiding all trace of it. In the beginning he only felt that there had been a loss, and that Ameera needed comforting, where she sat with her head on her knees shivering as Mian Mittu from the house-top called, Tota! Tota! Tota! Later all his world and the daily life of it rose up to hurt him. It was an outrage that any one of the children at the band-stand in the evening should be alive and clamorous, when his own child lay dead. It was more than mere pain when one of them touched him, and stories told by over-fond fathers of their children’s latest performances cut him to the quick. He could not declare his pain. He had neither help, comfort, nor sympathy; and Ameera at the end of each weary day would lead him through the hell of self-questioning reproach which is reserved for those who have lost a child, and believe that with a little—just a little—more care it might have been saved.

The first shock of a bullet feels like a quick pinch. The damaged body doesn’t register its pain with the soul until ten or fifteen seconds later. Holden experienced his pain slowly, just like he had experienced his happiness, with the same desperate need to hide any sign of it. At first, he only sensed that something was lost and that Ameera needed comfort, as she sat there with her head on her knees, shivering while Mian Mittu from the rooftop called, Tota! Tota! Tota! Eventually, everything in his world, the daily grind of it, rose up to hurt him. It felt like an injustice that any of the kids at the bandstand that evening should be alive and noisy while his own child lay dead. It was more than just pain when one of them touched him, and stories shared by overly doting fathers about their kids’ latest achievements cut deep. He couldn’t express his pain. He had no help, comfort, or sympathy; and Ameera, at the end of each exhausting day, would take him through the hell of self-questioning and guilt reserved for those who have lost a child, believing that with just a little—just a little—more care, it might have been prevented.

‘Perhaps,’ Ameera would say, ‘I did not take sufficient heed. Did I, or did I not? The sun on the roof that day when he played so long alone and I was—ahi! braiding my hair—it may be that the sun then bred the fever. If I had warned him from the sun he might have lived. But, oh my life, say that I am guiltless! Thou knowest that I loved him as I love thee. Say that there is no blame on me, or I shall die—I shall die!’

‘Maybe,’ Ameera would say, ‘I didn’t pay enough attention. Did I, or didn’t I? The sun on the roof that day when he played alone for so long and I was—oh! braiding my hair—it might be that the sun caused the fever. If I had warned him about the sun, he might have lived. But, oh my life, please say that I’m innocent! You know that I loved him as I love you. Say that there’s no blame on me, or I’ll die—I’ll die!’

‘There is no blame,—before God, none. It was written and how could we do aught to save? What has been, has been. Let it go, beloved.’

‘There’s no blame—honestly, none. It was written and how could we change anything to save it? What happened, happened. Let it go, my love.’

‘He was all my heart to me. How can I let the thought go when my arm tells me every night that he is not here? Ahi! Ahi! O Tota, come back to me—come back again, and let us be all together as it was before!’

‘He meant everything to me. How can I let that thought go when my arm reminds me every night that he’s gone? Oh! Oh! Tota, come back to me—come back again, and let us all be together like we were before!’

‘Peace, peace! For thine own sake, and for mine also, if thou lovest me—rest.’

‘Calm down, calm down! For your own sake, and for mine too, if you love me—just relax.’

‘By this I know thou dost not care; and how shouldst thou? The white men have hearts of stone and souls of iron. Oh, that I had married a man of mine own people—though he beat me—and had never eaten the bread of an alien!’

‘By this, I know you don't care; and why should you? The white men have hearts of stone and souls of iron. Oh, that I had married a man from my own people—even if he beat me—and had never eaten the bread of a stranger!’

‘Am I an alien—mother of my son?’

‘Am I an outsider—mother of my child?’

‘What else—Sahib?... Oh, forgive me—forgive! The death has driven me mad. Thou art the life of my heart, and the light of my eyes, and the breath of my life, and—and I have put thee from me, though it was but for a moment. If thou goest away, to whom shall I look for help? Do not be angry. Indeed, it was the pain that spoke and not thy slave.’

‘What else—Sahib?... Oh, forgive me—forgive! The death has driven me mad. You are the life of my heart, the light of my eyes, and the breath of my life, and—and I pushed you away, even if it was just for a moment. If you leave, who will I turn to for help? Please don’t be angry. Truly, it was the pain that spoke, not your servant.’

‘I know, I know. We be two who were three. The greater need therefore that we should be one.’

‘I get it, I get it. We were three, and now we’re just two. So it's even more important that we become one.’

They were sitting on the roof as of custom. The night was a warm one in early spring, and sheet-lightning was dancing on the horizon to a broken tune played by far-off thunder. Ameera settled herself in Holden’s arms.

They were sitting on the roof as usual. The night was warm for early spring, and sheet lightning flickered on the horizon to the distant sound of thunder. Ameera nestled into Holden’s arms.

‘The dry earth is lowing like a cow for the rain, and I—I am afraid. It was not like this when we counted the stars. But thou lovest me as much as before, though a bond is taken away? Answer!’

‘The dry earth is moaning like a cow for the rain, and I—I am afraid. It wasn’t like this when we counted the stars. But you love me as much as before, even though a bond is taken away? Answer!’

‘I love more because a new bond has come out of the sorrow that we have eaten together, and that thou knowest.’

‘I love more because a new bond has formed from the sadness we’ve shared together, and you know that.’

‘Yea, I knew,’ said Ameera in a very small whisper. ‘But it is good to hear thee say so, my life, who art so strong to help. I will be a child no more, but a woman and an aid to thee. Listen! Give me my sitar and I will sing bravely.’

‘Yeah, I knew,’ Ameera said in a quiet whisper. ‘But it's good to hear you say that, my love, since you’re so strong and supportive. I won’t be a child anymore; I’ll be a woman and a help to you. Listen! Give me my sitar and I’ll sing boldly.’

She took the light silver-studded sitar and began a song of the great hero Rajah Rasalu. The hand failed on the strings, the tune halted, checked, and at a low note turned off to the poor little nursery-rhyme about the wicked crow—

She picked up the light silver-studded sitar and started playing a song about the great hero Rajah Rasalu. Her hand slipped on the strings, the music stopped, and at a low note, it shifted to the simple nursery rhyme about the wicked crow—

     And the wild plums grow in the jungle, only a penny a pound.
     Only a penny a pound, baba—only . . .
     And the wild plums grow in the jungle, just a penny a pound.  
     Just a penny a pound, dad—only . . .

Then came the tears, and the piteous rebellion against fate till she slept, moaning a little in her sleep, with the right arm thrown clear of the body as though it protected something that was not there. It was after this night that life became a little easier for Holden. The ever-present pain of loss drove him into his work, and the work repaid him by filling up his mind for nine or ten hours a day. Ameera sat alone in the house and brooded, but grew happier when she understood that Holden was more at ease, according to the custom of women. They touched happiness again, but this time with caution.

Then the tears came, and she fought against fate until she fell asleep, moaning a bit in her sleep, with her right arm thrown out away from her body as if it were protecting something that wasn't there. It was after this night that life got a little easier for Holden. The constant pain of loss pushed him into his work, and the work helped him by occupying his mind for nine or ten hours a day. Ameera sat alone in the house and thought deeply, but felt happier when she realized that Holden was more at ease, as is typical for women. They found happiness again, but this time with caution.

‘It was because we loved Tota that he died. The jealousy of God was upon us,’ said Ameera. ‘I have hung up a large black jar before our window to turn the evil eye from us, and we must make no protestations of delight, but go softly underneath the stars, lest God find us out. Is that not good talk, worthless one?’

‘We loved Tota, and that's why he died. God's jealousy was upon us,’ Ameera said. ‘I've put up a big black jar in front of our window to ward off the evil eye, and we shouldn't show any signs of joy, but move quietly under the stars, so God doesn't notice us. Isn’t that wise, you worthless one?’

She had shifted the accent on the word that means ‘beloved,’ in proof of the sincerity of her purpose. But the kiss that followed the new christening was a thing that any deity might have envied. They went about henceforward saying, ‘It is naught, it is naught;’ and hoping that all the Powers heard.

She had changed the emphasis on the word that means ‘beloved’ to show her true intentions. But the kiss that came after this new name was something any god would have envied. From then on, they went around saying, ‘It doesn’t matter, it doesn’t matter,’ hoping that all the Powers were listening.

The Powers were busy on other things. They had allowed thirty million people four years of plenty wherein men fed well and the crops were certain, and the birth-rate rose year by year; the districts reported a purely agricultural population varying from nine hundred to two thousand to the square mile of the overburdened earth; and the Member for Lower Tooting, wandering about India in pot-hat and frock-coat, talked largely of the benefits of British rule and suggested as the one thing needful the establishment of a duly qualified electoral system and a general bestowal of the franchise. His long-suffering hosts smiled and made him welcome, and when he paused to admire, with pretty picked words, the blossom of the blood-red dhak-tree that had flowered untimely for a sign of what was coming, they smiled more than ever.

The Powers were occupied with other matters. They had granted thirty million people four years of prosperity during which people ate well, the crops were reliable, and the birth rate increased each year; the regions reported a primarily agricultural population ranging from nine hundred to two thousand people per square mile on the overburdened earth. Meanwhile, the Member for Lower Tooting, wandering around India in a bowler hat and suit, boasted about the benefits of British rule and suggested that the only necessary step was to establish a proper electoral system and widely distribute voting rights. His long-suffering hosts smiled and welcomed him, and when he paused to admire, with cleverly chosen words, the bloom of the blood-red dhak tree that had flowered out of season as a sign of what was coming, they smiled even more.

It was the Deputy Commissioner of Kot-Kumharsen, staying at the club for a day, who lightly told a tale that made Holden’s blood run cold as he overheard the end.

It was the Deputy Commissioner of Kot-Kumharsen, who was staying at the club for a day, that casually shared a story that sent chills down Holden’s spine as he caught the last part of it.

‘He won’t bother any one any more. Never saw a man so astonished in my life. By Jove, I thought he meant to ask a question in the House about it. Fellow-passenger in his ship—dined next him—bowled over by cholera and died in eighteen hours. You needn’t laugh, you fellows. The Member for Lower Tooting is awfully angry about it; but he’s more scared. I think he’s going to take his enlightened self out of India.’

‘He won’t bother anyone anymore. I’ve never seen a man so shocked in my life. Honestly, I thought he was going to ask a question about it in the House. A fellow passenger on his ship—sat next to him at dinner—was taken down by cholera and died in eighteen hours. You don’t need to laugh, guys. The Member for Lower Tooting is really angry about it, but he’s even more scared. I think he’s going to take his enlightened self out of India.’

‘I’d give a good deal if he were knocked over. It might keep a few vestrymen of his kidney to their own parish. But what’s this about cholera? It’s full early for anything of that kind,’ said the warden of an unprofitable salt-lick.

‘I’d pay a lot if he got taken down. It might keep a few vestrymen like him focused on their own parish. But what’s this about cholera? It’s way too early for anything like that,’ said the warden of a useless salt-lick.

‘Don’t know,’ said the Deputy Commissioner reflectively. ‘We’ve got locusts with us. There’s sporadic cholera all along the north—at least we’re calling it sporadic for decency’s sake. The spring crops are short in five districts, and nobody seems to know where the rains are. It’s nearly March now. I don’t want to scare anybody, but it seems to me that Nature’s going to audit her accounts with a big red pencil this summer.’

‘Don’t know,’ said the Deputy Commissioner thoughtfully. ‘We’ve got locusts with us. There’s scattered cholera all along the north—at least we’re calling it scattered for politeness. The spring crops are lacking in five districts, and no one seems to know where the rains are. It’s almost March now. I don’t want to alarm anyone, but it seems to me that Nature’s going to review her accounts with a big red pencil this summer.’

‘Just when I wanted to take leave, too!’ said a voice across the room.

‘Just when I wanted to take time off, too!’ said a voice across the room.

‘There won’t be much leave this year, but there ought to be a great deal of promotion. I’ve come in to persuade the Government to put my pet canal on the list of famine-relief works. It’s an ill-wind that blows no good. I shall get that canal finished at last.’

‘There won’t be much time off this year, but there should be a lot of promotions. I’ve come in to convince the Government to include my favorite canal on the list of famine-relief projects. Every cloud has a silver lining. I’m determined to get that canal finished once and for all.’

‘Is it the old programme then,’ said Holden; ‘famine, fever, and cholera?’

‘Is it the same old routine then,’ said Holden; ‘hunger, illness, and cholera?’

‘Oh no. Only local scarcity and an unusual prevalence of seasonal sickness. You’ll find it all in the reports if you live till next year. You’re a lucky chap. YOU haven’t got a wife to send out of harm’s way. The hill-stations ought to be full of women this year.’

‘Oh no. Just local shortages and an unusual spike in seasonal illnesses. You’ll find all that in the reports if you make it to next year. You’re a lucky guy. YOU don’t have a wife to send away from danger. The hill stations should be crowded with women this year.’

‘I think you’re inclined to exaggerate the talk in the bazars’ said a young civilian in the Secretariat. ‘Now I have observed—’

‘I think you tend to exaggerate what’s being said in the markets,’ said a young staff member in the Secretariat. ‘Now I’ve noticed—’

‘I daresay you have,’ said the Deputy Commissioner, ‘but you’ve a great deal more to observe, my son. In the meantime, I wish to observe to you—’ and he drew him aside to discuss the construction of the canal that was so dear to his heart. Holden went to his bungalow and began to understand that he was not alone in the world, and also that he was afraid for the sake of another,—which is the most soul-satisfying fear known to man.

‘I bet you have,’ said the Deputy Commissioner, ‘but there’s a lot more for you to notice, my son. In the meantime, I want to point out to you—’ and he pulled him aside to talk about the canal that meant so much to him. Holden went to his bungalow and started to realize that he wasn’t alone in the world, and also that he was worried for someone else—which is the most fulfilling fear known to man.

Two months later, as the Deputy had foretold, Nature began to audit her accounts with a red pencil. On the heels of the spring-reapings came a cry for bread, and the Government, which had decreed that no man should die of want, sent wheat. Then came the cholera from all four quarters of the compass. It struck a pilgrim-gathering of half a million at a sacred shrine. Many died at the feet of their god; the others broke and ran over the face of the land carrying the pestilence with them. It smote a walled city and killed two hundred a day. The people crowded the trains, hanging on to the footboards and squatting on the roofs of the carriages, and the cholera followed them, for at each station they dragged out the dead and the dying. They died by the roadside, and the horses of the Englishmen shied at the corpses in the grass. The rains did not come, and the earth turned to iron lest man should escape death by hiding in her. The English sent their wives away to the hills and went about their work, coming forward as they were bidden to fill the gaps in the fighting-line. Holden, sick with fear of losing his chiefest treasure on earth, had done his best to persuade Ameera to go away with her mother to the Himalayas.

Two months later, just as the Deputy had predicted, Nature started to take stock of her resources with a red pencil. Following the spring harvests came a desperate cry for food, and the Government, which had promised that no one would die from hunger, sent wheat. Then cholera arrived from all directions. It hit a gathering of half a million pilgrims at a holy shrine. Many died at the feet of their god; the rest panicked and fled across the land, spreading the disease with them. It struck a walled city, killing two hundred people each day. The public packed the trains, clinging to the footboards and sitting on the roofs, and cholera followed them, as they dragged out the dead and dying at each station. They died along the roadside, and the horses of the Englishmen shied away from the corpses in the grass. The rains didn’t come, and the ground hardened like iron so that people couldn’t escape death by hiding in it. The English sent their wives away to the hills and continued with their work, stepping up to fill the gaps in the fighting line as requested. Holden, terrified of losing his most precious possession, did his best to convince Ameera to go away with her mother to the Himalayas.

‘Why should I go?’ said she one evening on the roof.

‘Why should I go?’ she said one evening on the roof.

‘There is sickness, and people are dying, and all the white mem-log have gone.’

‘There is illness, and people are dying, and all the white men have gone.’

‘All of them?’

"All of them?"

‘All—unless perhaps there remain some old scald-head who vexes her husband’s heart by running risk of death.’

‘Everyone—unless maybe there’s some old scald-head who troubles her husband’s heart by risking death.’

‘Nay; who stays is my sister, and thou must not abuse her, for I will be a scald-head too. I am glad all the bold mem-log are gone.’

‘No; the one who stays is my sister, and you must not mistreat her, because I will be furious as well. I’m glad all the arrogant fools are gone.’

‘Do I speak to a woman or a babe? Go to the hills and I will see to it that thou goest like a queen’s daughter. Think, child. In a red-lacquered bullock-cart, veiled and curtained, with brass peacocks upon the pole and red cloth hangings. I will send two orderlies for guard, and—’

‘Am I talking to a woman or a child? Go to the hills and I’ll make sure you go like a queen’s daughter. Think about it, kid. In a red-lacquered bullock cart, veiled and curtained, with brass peacocks on the pole and red cloth hangings. I’ll send two orderlies for protection, and—’

‘Peace! Thou art the babe in speaking thus. What use are those toys to me? HE would have patted the bullocks and played with the housings. For his sake, perhaps,—thou hast made me very English—I might have gone. Now, I will not. Let the mem-log run.’

‘Peace! You’re being naive by saying that. What good are those toys to me? He would have patted the calves and played with the harness. For his sake, maybe—you’ve made me very English—I might have gone. Now, I won't. Let the mem-log run.’

‘Their husbands are sending them, beloved.’

‘Their husbands are sending them, dear.’

‘Very good talk. Since when hast thou been my husband to tell me what to do? I have but borne thee a son. Thou art only all the desire of my soul to me. How shall I depart when I know that if evil befall thee by the breadth of so much as my littlest finger-nail—is that not small?—I should be aware of it though I were in paradise. And here, this summer thou mayest die—ai, janee, die! and in dying they might call to tend thee a white woman, and she would rob me in the last of thy love!’

‘Great talk. Since when have you been my husband, telling me what to do? I’ve only given you a son. You are the only thing I truly desire. How can I leave when I know that if something happens to you, even just the tiniest bit, I would feel it, even if I were in paradise? And now, this summer you could die—oh, God, die! And in your dying, they might send a white woman to take care of you, and she would take the last of your love from me!’

‘But love is not born in a moment or on a death-bed!’

‘But love doesn't just happen in a moment or on a deathbed!’

‘What dost thou know of love, stoneheart? She would take thy thanks at least and, by God and the Prophet and Beebee Miriam the mother of thy Prophet, that I will never endure. My lord and my love, let there be no more foolish talk of going away. Where thou art, I am. It is enough.’ She put an arm round his neck and a hand on his mouth.

‘What do you know about love, heart of stone? She would at least accept your thanks and, by God, the Prophet, and Beebee Miriam, the mother of your Prophet, I will never tolerate that. My lord and my love, let’s not have any more silly talk of leaving. Wherever you are, I am. That is enough.’ She put an arm around his neck and a hand over his mouth.

There are not many happinesses so complete as those that are snatched under the shadow of the sword. They sat together and laughed, calling each other openly by every pet name that could move the wrath of the gods. The city below them was locked up in its own torments. Sulphur fires blazed in the streets; the conches in the Hindu temples screamed and bellowed, for the gods were inattentive in those days. There was a service in the great Mahomedan shrine, and the call to prayer from the minarets was almost unceasing. They heard the wailing in the houses of the dead, and once the shriek of a mother who had lost a child and was calling for its return. In the gray dawn they saw the dead borne out through the city gates, each litter with its own little knot of mourners. Wherefore they kissed each other and shivered.

There aren't many joys as complete as those grabbed under the threat of danger. They sat together and laughed, using every pet name that could provoke the gods' anger. The city below was trapped in its own suffering. Sulfur fires blazed in the streets; the conches in the Hindu temples cried out loudly, as the gods were ignoring everyone during those times. There was a service at the large Muslim shrine, and the call to prayer from the minarets was almost nonstop. They heard the mourning in the homes of the deceased, and once they heard a mother’s scream as she called out for her lost child. In the gray dawn, they saw the dead being carried out through the city gates, each stretcher accompanied by its own small group of mourners. So, they kissed each other and shivered.

It was a red and heavy audit, for the land was very sick and needed a little breathing-space ere the torrent of cheap life should flood it anew. The children of immature fathers and undeveloped mothers made no resistance. They were cowed and sat still, waiting till the sword should be sheathed in November if it were so willed. There were gaps among the English, but the gaps were filled. The work of superintending famine-relief, cholera-sheds, medicine-distribution, and what little sanitation was possible, went forward because it was so ordered.

It was a tough and intense audit because the land was really suffering and needed some breathing room before the wave of cheap energy flooded in again. The kids of unprepared fathers and underdeveloped mothers didn’t resist. They were subdued and sat quietly, waiting for the crisis to calm down in November if that was what fate had in store. There were gaps among the English, but those gaps were filled. The efforts to manage famine relief, cholera treatment facilities, medicine distribution, and whatever sanitation could be done continued as planned.

Holden had been told to keep himself in readiness to move to replace the next man who should fall. There were twelve hours in each day when he could not see Ameera, and she might die in three. He was considering what his pain would be if he could not see her for three months, or if she died out of his sight. He was absolutely certain that her death would be demanded—so certain that when he looked up from the telegram and saw Pir Khan breathless in the doorway, he laughed aloud. ‘And?’ said he,—

Holden had been told to be ready to step in for the next person who fell. There were twelve hours each day when he couldn’t see Ameera, and she might die in three. He was thinking about how much it would hurt if he couldn’t see her for three months, or if she died while he wasn't there. He was completely convinced that her death would be inevitable—so sure that when he looked up from the telegram and saw Pir Khan, breathless in the doorway, he laughed out loud. “And?” he said,—

‘When there is a cry in the night and the spirit flutters into the throat, who has a charm that will restore? Come swiftly, Heaven-born! It is the black cholera.’

‘When there's a scream in the night and the spirit chokes in the throat, who has a spell that can heal? Come quickly, Heaven-sent! It's the black cholera.’

Holden galloped to his home. The sky was heavy with clouds, for the long-deferred rains were near and the heat was stifling. Ameera’s mother met him in the courtyard, whimpering, ‘She is dying. She is nursing herself into death. She is all but dead. What shall I do, sahib?’

Holden raced back to his home. The sky was filled with heavy clouds, as the long-awaited rain was coming and the heat was sweltering. Ameera’s mother approached him in the courtyard, sobbing, ‘She’s dying. She’s nursing herself to death. She’s almost gone. What should I do, sir?’

Ameera was lying in the room in which Tota had been born. She made no sign when Holden entered, because the human soul is a very lonely thing and, when it is getting ready to go away, hides itself in a misty borderland where the living may not follow. The black cholera does its work quietly and without explanation. Ameera was being thrust out of life as though the Angel of Death had himself put his hand upon her. The quick breathing seemed to show that she was either afraid or in pain, but neither eyes nor mouth gave any answer to Holden’s kisses. There was nothing to be said or done. Holden could only wait and suffer. The first drops of the rain began to fall on the roof, and he could hear shouts of joy in the parched city.

Ameera was lying in the room where Tota had been born. She didn't react when Holden entered, because the human soul is a very lonely thing and, when it's preparing to leave, it hides itself in a foggy borderland where the living can't follow. The black cholera does its work quietly and without explanation. Ameera was being pushed out of life as if the Angel of Death himself had laid a hand on her. Her rapid breathing seemed to indicate that she was either scared or in pain, but neither her eyes nor her mouth responded to Holden’s kisses. There was nothing to say or do. Holden could only wait and suffer. The first drops of rain began to fall on the roof, and he could hear shouts of joy in the dry city.

The soul came back a little and the lips moved. Holden bent down to listen. ‘Keep nothing of mine,’ said Ameera. ‘Take no hair from my head. SHE would make thee burn it later on. That flame I should feel. Lower! Stoop lower! Remember only that I was thine and bore thee a son. Though thou wed a white woman to-morrow, the pleasure of receiving in thy arms thy first son is taken from thee for ever. Remember me when thy son is born—the one that shall carry thy name before all men. His misfortunes be on my head. I bear witness—I bear witness’—the lips were forming the words on his ear—‘that there is no God but—thee, beloved!’

The soul returned a bit, and the lips began to move. Holden leaned in to listen. "Keep none of my things," said Ameera. "Don't take any hair from my head. She'll just make you burn it later. I would feel that flame. Lower! Bend down more! Just remember that I was yours and gave you a son. Even if you marry a white woman tomorrow, you'll never experience the joy of holding your first son in your arms. Remember me when your son is born—the one who will carry your name for all to see. His troubles will be my responsibility. I bear witness—I bear witness"—the lips were shaping the words against his ear—"that there is no God but—you, my love!"

Then she died. Holden sat still, and all thought was taken from him,—till he heard Ameera’s mother lift the curtain.

Then she died. Holden sat still, and all thoughts left him—until he heard Ameera’s mother lift the curtain.

‘Is she dead, sahib?’

"Is she dead, sir?"

‘She is dead.’

"She's dead."

‘Then I will mourn, and afterwards take an inventory of the furniture in this house. For that will be mine. The sahib does not mean to resume it? It is so little, so very little, sahib, and I am an old woman. I would like to lie softly.’

‘Then I will grieve, and afterwards count the furniture in this house. Because that will belong to me. The owner doesn’t plan to take it back? It is so little, so very little, sir, and I am an old woman. I would like to lie down comfortably.’

‘For the mercy of God be silent a while. Go out and mourn where I cannot hear.’

‘For the mercy of God, be quiet for a bit. Go outside and grieve where I can't hear.’

‘Sahib, she will be buried in four hours.’

‘Sahib, she'll be buried in four hours.’

‘I know the custom. I shall go ere she is taken away. That matter is in thy hands. Look to it, that the bed on which—on which she lies—’

‘I know the custom. I’ll go before she’s taken away. That’s up to you. Make sure that the bed on which—on which she lies—’

‘Aha! That beautiful red-lacquered bed. I have long desired—’

‘Aha! That stunning red-lacquered bed. I have wanted—’

‘That the bed is left here untouched for my disposal. All else in the house is thine. Hire a cart, take everything, go hence, and before sunrise let there be nothing in this house but that which I have ordered thee to respect.’

‘The bed is left here untouched for me to use. Everything else in the house is yours. Rent a cart, take everything, leave, and before sunrise, make sure there’s nothing left in this house except what I’ve told you to respect.’

‘I am an old woman. I would stay at least for the days of mourning, and the rains have just broken. Whither shall I go?’

‘I am an old woman. I would stay at least for the days of mourning, and the rains have just broken. Where shall I go?’

‘What is that to me? My order is that there is a going. The house-gear is worth a thousand rupees and my orderly shall bring thee a hundred rupees to-night.’

‘What does that matter to me? My instruction is to leave. The house equipment is worth a thousand rupees, and my assistant will bring you a hundred rupees tonight.’

‘That is very little. Think of the cart-hire.’

‘That's not much. Consider the cost of hiring a cart.’

‘It shall be nothing unless thou goest, and with speed. O woman, get hence and leave me with my dead!’

‘It will mean nothing unless you go, and quickly. Oh woman, get out of here and leave me with my dead!’

The mother shuffled down the staircase, and in her anxiety to take stock of the house-fittings forgot to mourn. Holden stayed by Ameera’s side and the rain roared on the roof. He could not think connectedly by reason of the noise, though he made many attempts to do so. Then four sheeted ghosts glided dripping into the room and stared at him through their veils. They were the washers of the dead. Holden left the room and went out to his horse. He had come in a dead, stifling calm through ankle-deep dust. He found the courtyard a rain-lashed pond alive with frogs; a torrent of yellow water ran under the gate, and a roaring wind drove the bolts of the rain like buckshot against the mud-walls. Pir Khan was shivering in his little hut by the gate, and the horse was stamping uneasily in the water.

The mother shuffled down the stairs, and in her anxiety to assess the house’s furnishings, she forgot to grieve. Holden stayed by Ameera’s side while the rain pounded on the roof. He struggled to think clearly because of the noise, even though he made several attempts to do so. Then four sheeted figures glided in, dripping wet, and stared at him through their veils. They were the washers of the dead. Holden left the room and headed out to his horse. He had entered in a dead, suffocating calm through ankle-deep dust. The courtyard was now a rain-soaked pond filled with frogs; a rush of yellow water flowed under the gate, and a howling wind drove the rain against the mud walls like buckshot. Pir Khan was shivering in his small hut by the gate, and the horse was nervously stamping in the water.

‘I have been told the sahib’s order,’ said Pir Khan. ‘It is well. This house is now desolate. I go also, for my monkey-face would be a reminder of that which has been. Concerning the bed, I will bring that to thy house yonder in the morning; but remember, sahib, it will be to thee a knife turning in a green wound. I go upon a pilgrimage, and I will take no money. I have grown fat in the protection of the Presence whose sorrow is my sorrow. For the last time I hold his stirrup.’

"I’ve heard the sahib’s orders," said Pir Khan. "That’s fine. This house is empty now. I’m leaving too, because my face would remind me of what’s past. About the bed, I’ll bring it to your house over there in the morning; but remember, sahib, it will feel like a knife twisting in a fresh wound for you. I'm going on a pilgrimage, and I won’t take any money. I’ve grown comfortable under the protection of the Presence whose grief is my grief. This is the last time I’ll hold his stirrup."

He touched Holden’s foot with both hands and the horse sprang out into the road, where the creaking bamboos were whipping the sky and all the frogs were chuckling. Holden could not see for the rain in his face. He put his hands before his eyes and muttered—

He placed both hands on Holden’s foot, and the horse jumped onto the road, where the creaking bamboos were whipping at the sky and all the frogs were croaking. Holden couldn’t see because of the rain hitting his face. He covered his eyes with his hands and mumbled—

‘Oh you brute! You utter brute!’

‘Oh, you monster! You complete monster!’

The news of his trouble was already in his bungalow. He read the knowledge in his butler’s eyes when Ahmed Khan brought in food, and for the first and last time in his life laid a hand upon his master’s shoulder, saying, ‘Eat, sahib, eat. Meat is good against sorrow. I also have known. Moreover the shadows come and go, sahib; the shadows come and go. These be curried eggs.’

The news of his troubles had already reached his bungalow. He saw the understanding in his butler’s eyes when Ahmed Khan brought in food and, for the first and last time in his life, placed a hand on his master’s shoulder, saying, ‘Eat, sir, eat. Meat helps against sadness. I’ve experienced that too. Besides, the shadows come and go, sir; the shadows come and go. These are curried eggs.’

Holden could neither eat nor sleep. The heavens sent down eight inches of rain in that night and washed the earth clean. The waters tore down walls, broke roads, and scoured open the shallow graves on the Mahomedan burying-ground. All next day it rained, and Holden sat still in his house considering his sorrow. On the morning of the third day he received a telegram which said only, ‘Ricketts, Myndonie. Dying. Holden relieve. Immediate.’ Then he thought that before he departed he would look at the house wherein he had been master and lord. There was a break in the weather, and the rank earth steamed with vapour.

Holden could neither eat nor sleep. That night, the heavens dumped eight inches of rain and washed the earth clean. The flood tore down walls, destroyed roads, and uncovered the shallow graves in the Muslim cemetery. It rained all the next day, and Holden sat quietly in his house, reflecting on his sorrow. On the morning of the third day, he received a telegram that simply read, ‘Ricketts, Myndonie. Dying. Holden relieve. Immediate.’ He then thought that before he left, he would take a final look at the house where he had been the master. There was a break in the weather, and the damp earth steamed with vapor.

He found that the rains had torn down the mud pillars of the gateway, and the heavy wooden gate that had guarded his life hung lazily from one hinge. There was grass three inches high in the courtyard; Pir Khan’s lodge was empty, and the sodden thatch sagged between the beams. A gray squirrel was in possession of the verandah, as if the house had been untenanted for thirty years instead of three days. Ameera’s mother had removed everything except some mildewed matting. The tick-tick of the little scorpions as they hurried across the floor was the only sound in the house. Ameera’s room and the other one where Tota had lived were heavy with mildew; and the narrow staircase leading to the roof was streaked and stained with rain-borne mud. Holden saw all these things, and came out again to meet in the road Durga Dass, his landlord,—portly, affable, clothed in white muslin, and driving a Cee-spring buggy. He was overlooking his property to see how the roofs stood the stress of the first rains.

He noticed that the rains had knocked down the mud pillars of the gateway, and the heavy wooden gate that had protected his home was hanging limply from one hinge. The grass in the courtyard was three inches tall; Pir Khan’s lodge was empty, and the soaked thatch drooped between the beams. A gray squirrel occupied the verandah as if the house had been uninhabited for thirty years instead of just three days. Ameera’s mother had taken everything away except for some moldy matting. The only sound in the house was the tick-tick of little scorpions scurrying across the floor. Ameera’s room and the other one where Tota had lived were filled with mildew, and the narrow staircase leading to the roof was streaked and stained with mud from the rain. Holden observed all this and stepped outside to meet his landlord, Durga Dass—plump, friendly, dressed in white muslin, and driving a Cee-spring buggy. He was checking on his property to see how the roofs had held up under the first rains.

‘I have heard,’ said he, ‘you will not take this place any more, sahib?’

‘I’ve heard,’ he said, ‘you’re not going to take this place anymore, sir?’

‘What are you going to do with it?’

‘What are you going to do with it?’

‘Perhaps I shall let it again.’

‘Maybe I'll let it happen again.’

‘Then I will keep it on while I am away.’

‘Then I will wear it while I’m gone.’

Durga Dass was silent for some time. ‘You shall not take it on, sahib,’ he said. ‘When I was a young man I also—, but to-day I am a member of the Municipality. Ho! Ho! No. When the birds have gone what need to keep the nest? I will have it pulled down—the timber will sell for something always. It shall be pulled down, and the Municipality shall make a road across, as they desire, from the burning-ghat to the city wall, so that no man may say where this house stood.’

Durga Dass was quiet for a while. “You shouldn’t take it on, sir,” he said. “When I was younger, I also—, but today I’m a member of the Municipality. Ha! No. When the birds have left, why keep the nest? I’ll have it torn down—the wood will sell for something, anyway. It will be demolished, and the Municipality will build a road across, as they want, from the cremation ground to the city wall, so that no one can say where this house used to be.”





AT THE END OF THE PASSAGE

 The sky is lead and our faces are red,
 And the gates of Hell are opened and riven,
 And the winds of Hell are loosened and driven,
 And the dust flies up in the face of Heaven,
 And the clouds come down in a fiery sheet,
 Heavy to raise and hard to be borne.
 And the soul of man is turned from his meat,
 Turned from the trifles for which he has striven
 Sick in his body, and heavy hearted,
 And his soul flies up like the dust in the sheet
 Breaks from his flesh and is gone and departed,
 As the blasts they blow on the cholera-horn.
                            HIMALAYAN.
The sky is gray and our faces are flushed,  
And the gates of Hell are wide open,  
And the winds of Hell are unleashed and fierce,  
And the dust sweeps up into the air,  
And the clouds come down in a fiery rush,  
Heavy to lift and hard to bear.  
And the soul of man turns away from his food,  
Turns away from the little things he's worked for,  
Sick in body, and burdened in heart,  
And his soul rises up like the dust in the air,  
Breaks free from his body and is gone,  
As the sounds blare from the cholera horn.  
                            HIMALAYAN.

Four men, each entitled to ‘life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness,’ sat at a table playing whist. The thermometer marked—for them—one hundred and one degrees of heat. The room was darkened till it was only just possible to distinguish the pips of the cards and the very white faces of the players. A tattered, rotten punkah of whitewashed calico was puddling the hot air and whining dolefully at each stroke. Outside lay gloom of a November day in London. There was neither sky, sun, nor horizon,—nothing but a brown purple haze of heat. It was as though the earth were dying of apoplexy.

Four men, each with the right to "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness," sat at a table playing cards. The thermometer read a sweltering one hundred and one degrees. The room was dimly lit, just bright enough to see the cards and the pale faces of the players. A tattered, worn-out fan made of whitewashed fabric was stirring the hot air, emitting a sad whine with each pull. Outside, a gloomy November day enveloped London. There was no sky, sun, or horizon—only a brownish-purple haze of heat. It felt as if the earth was suffocating from the heat.

From time to time clouds of tawny dust rose from the ground without wind or warning, flung themselves tablecloth-wise among the tops of the parched trees, and came down again. Then a whirling dust-devil would scutter across the plain for a couple of miles, break, and fall outward, though there was nothing to check its flight save a long low line of piled railway-sleepers white with the dust, a cluster of huts made of mud, condemned rails, and canvas, and the one squat four-roomed bungalow that belonged to the assistant engineer in charge of a section of the Gaudhari State line then under construction.

From time to time, clouds of brown dust would rise from the ground without any wind or warning, swirling upwards like tablecloths among the tops of the dry trees before settling back down. Then a swirling dust devil would race across the plain for a couple of miles, break apart, and scatter, with nothing to stop its movement except a long, low line of railway sleepers coated white with dust, a cluster of mud huts, abandoned rails, and the one small four-room bungalow that belonged to the assistant engineer overseeing a section of the Gaudhari State line that was under construction at the time.

The four, stripped to the thinnest of sleeping-suits, played whist crossly, with wranglings as to leads and returns. It was not the best kind of whist, but they had taken some trouble to arrive at it. Mottram of the Indian Survey had ridden thirty and railed one hundred miles from his lonely post in the desert since the night before; Lowndes of the Civil Service, on special duty in the political department, had come as far to escape for an instant the miserable intrigues of an impoverished native State whose king alternately fawned and blustered for more money from the pitiful revenues contributed by hard-wrung peasants and despairing camel-breeders; Spurstow, the doctor of the line, had left a cholera-stricken camp of coolies to look after itself for forty-eight hours while he associated with white men once more. Hummil, the assistant engineer, was the host. He stood fast and received his friends thus every Sunday if they could come in. When one of them failed to appear, he would send a telegram to his last address, in order that he might know whether the defaulter were dead or alive. There are very many places in the East where it is not good or kind to let your acquaintances drop out of sight even for one short week.

The four of them, wearing the lightest of sleeping suits, played whist with irritation, bickering over leads and returns. It wasn’t the best game of whist, but they had made an effort to make it happen. Mottram from the Indian Survey had ridden thirty miles and taken a train for a hundred to get from his isolated post in the desert since the night before; Lowndes from the Civil Service, on special duty in the political department, had traveled just as far to escape for a moment the miserable scheming of a struggling native State whose king alternated between begging and demanding more money from the meager revenues contributed by exhausted peasants and desperate camel breeders; Spurstow, the line doctor, had left a camp of coolies suffering from cholera to fend for itself for forty-eight hours so he could hang out with white men again. Hummil, the assistant engineer, was the host. He stood firm and welcomed his friends like this every Sunday if they could make it. If one of them didn’t show up, he would send a telegram to their last known address to find out if the missing person was dead or alive. There are many places in the East where it’s not considerate or kind to let your acquaintances vanish from your life, even for just one short week.

The players were not conscious of any special regard for each other. They squabbled whenever they met; but they ardently desired to meet, as men without water desire to drink. They were lonely folk who understood the dread meaning of loneliness. They were all under thirty years of age,—which is too soon for any man to possess that knowledge.

The players didn’t have any special feelings for one another. They argued whenever they crossed paths, but they were eager to meet, like people lost in a desert crave water. They were lonely individuals who truly grasped the painful reality of being alone. All of them were under thirty years old—which is too early for anyone to have that kind of understanding.

‘Pilsener?’ said Spurstow, after the second rubber, mopping his forehead.

‘Pilsner?’ Spurstow said, wiping his forehead after the second rubber.

‘Beer’s out, I’m sorry to say, and there’s hardly enough soda-water for to-night,’ said Hummil.

‘We’re out of beer, I’m sorry to say, and there’s barely enough soda water for tonight,’ said Hummil.

‘What filthy bad management!’ Spurstow snarled.

"Such poor management!" Spurstow snapped.

‘Can’t help it. I’ve written and wired; but the trains don’t come through regularly yet. Last week the ice ran out,—as Lowndes knows.’

‘Can’t help it. I’ve written and sent messages; but the trains still don’t run on schedule. Last week the ice melted,—as Lowndes knows.’

‘Glad I didn’t come. I could ha’ sent you some if I had known, though. Phew! it’s too hot to go on playing bumblepuppy.’ This with a savage scowl at Lowndes, who only laughed. He was a hardened offender.

‘Glad I didn’t come. I could’ve sent you some if I had known, though. Phew! it’s too hot to keep playing bumblepuppy.’ He said this with a fierce scowl at Lowndes, who just laughed. He was a seasoned troublemaker.

Mottram rose from the table and looked out of a chink in the shutters.

Mottram got up from the table and peeked through a small gap in the shutters.

‘What a sweet day!’ said he.

‘What a nice day!’ he said.

The company yawned all together and betook themselves to an aimless investigation of all Hummil’s possessions,—guns, tattered novels, saddlery, spurs, and the like. They had fingered them a score of times before, but there was really nothing else to do.

The company yawned in unison and set off on a pointless exploration of all of Hummil's belongings—guns, worn-out novels, saddles, spurs, and so on. They had handled these items countless times before, but there was honestly nothing else to do.

‘Got anything fresh?’ said Lowndes.

"Got anything new?" said Lowndes.

‘Last week’s Gazette of India, and a cutting from a home paper. My father sent it out. It’s rather amusing.’

‘Last week’s Gazette of India and a clipping from a local paper. My dad sent it out. It’s kind of funny.’

‘One of those vestrymen that call ‘emselves M.P.‘s again, is it?’ said Spurstow, who read his newspapers when he could get them.

‘One of those vestrymen who call themselves M.P.s again, right?’ said Spurstow, who read his newspapers whenever he could get them.

‘Yes. Listen to this. It’s to your address, Lowndes. The man was making a speech to his constituents, and he piled it on. Here’s a sample: “And I assert unhesitatingly that the Civil Service in India is the preserve—the pet preserve—of the aristocracy of England. What does the democracy—what do the masses—get from that country, which we have step by step fraudulently annexed? I answer, nothing whatever. It is farmed with a single eye to their own interests by the scions of the aristocracy. They take good care to maintain their lavish scale of incomes, to avoid or stifle any inquiries into the nature and conduct of their administration, while they themselves force the unhappy peasant to pay with the sweat of his brow for all the luxuries in which they are lapped.”’ Hummil waved the cutting above his head. ‘’Ear! ‘ear!’ said his audience.

‘Yes. Listen to this. It’s addressed to you, Lowndes. The man was giving a speech to his constituents, and he really went all out. Here’s a sample: “I firmly state that the Civil Service in India belongs exclusively to the aristocracy of England. What does the democracy—what do the masses—receive from that country, which we have gradually and deceitfully taken over? I say, nothing at all. It is managed solely for their own benefit by the heirs of the aristocracy. They make sure to keep their extravagant incomes intact, to avoid or silence any questions about how they run things, while they force the poor peasant to pay with his hard work for all the luxuries they enjoy.”’ Hummil waved the clipping above his head. ‘’Hear! Hear!’ said his audience.

Then Lowndes, meditatively: ‘I’d give—I’d give three months’ pay to have that gentleman spend one month with me and see how the free and independent native prince works things. Old Timbersides’—this was his flippant title for an honoured and decorated feudatory prince—‘has been wearing my life out this week past for money. By Jove, his latest performance was to send me one of his women as a bribe!’

Then Lowndes, thoughtfully said, “I’d give—I’d give three months’ salary to have that guy spend one month with me and see how the free and independent native prince operates. Old Timbersides”—this was his joking way of referring to an esteemed and decorated feudal prince—“has been driving me crazy this past week for money. Honestly, his latest move was to send me one of his women as a bribe!”

‘Good for you! Did you accept it?’ said Mottram.

“Good for you! Did you take it?” said Mottram.

‘No. I rather wish I had, now. She was a pretty little person, and she yarned away to me about the horrible destitution among the king’s women-folk. The darlings haven’t had any new clothes for nearly a month, and the old man wants to buy a new drag from Calcutta,—solid silver railings and silver lamps, and trifles of that kind. I’ve tried to make him understand that he has played the deuce with the revenues for the last twenty years and must go slow. He can’t see it.’

‘No. I kind of wish I had, now. She was a pretty little person, and she talked to me about the terrible poverty among the king’s women. The poor things haven’t had any new clothes for almost a month, and the old guy wants to buy a new carriage from Calcutta—solid silver railings, silver lamps, and stuff like that. I’ve tried to make him understand that he’s messed up the finances for the last twenty years and needs to take it easy. He just doesn’t get it.’

‘But he has the ancestral treasure-vaults to draw on. There must be three millions at least in jewels and coin under his palace,’ said Hummil.

‘But he has the family treasure vaults to rely on. There has to be at least three million in jewels and cash under his palace,’ said Hummil.

‘Catch a native king disturbing the family treasure! The priests forbid it except as the last resort. Old Timbersides has added something like a quarter of a million to the deposit in his reign.’

‘Catch a local king messing with the family treasure! The priests prohibit it except as a last resort. Old Timbersides has added something like a quarter of a million to the deposit during his time.’

‘Where the mischief does it all come from?’ said Mottram.

‘Where on Earth does it all come from?’ said Mottram.

‘The country. The state of the people is enough to make you sick. I’ve known the tax-men wait by a milch-camel till the foal was born and then hurry off the mother for arrears. And what can I do? I can’t get the court clerks to give me any accounts; I can’t raise anything more than a fat smile from the commander-in-chief when I find out the troops are three months in arrears; and old Timbersides begins to weep when I speak to him. He has taken to the King’s Peg heavily,—liqueur brandy for whisky, and Heidsieck for soda-water.’

‘The country's situation is enough to make you sick. I’ve seen tax collectors wait by a milking camel until the foal is born and then rush off the mother for unpaid taxes. And what can I do about it? I can’t get the court clerks to give me any records; I can’t get more than a big smile from the commander-in-chief when I find out that the troops haven’t been paid in three months; and old Timbersides starts to cry when I talk to him. He’s been hitting the King’s Peg hard—liqueur brandy instead of whisky, and Heidsieck instead of soda water.’

‘That’s what the Rao of Jubela took to. Even a native can’t last long at that,’ said Spurstow. ‘He’ll go out.’

‘That's what the Rao of Jubela got into. Even a local can't last long at that,’ said Spurstow. ‘He'll be out.’

‘And a good thing, too. Then I suppose we’ll have a council of regency, and a tutor for the young prince, and hand him back his kingdom with ten years’ accumulations.’

‘And that's a good thing, too. I guess we’ll have a council of regency, and a tutor for the young prince, and return his kingdom to him with ten years’ worth of wealth.’

‘Whereupon that young prince, having been taught all the vices of the English, will play ducks and drakes with the money and undo ten years’ work in eighteen months. I’ve seen that business before,’ said Spurstow. ‘I should tackle the king with a light hand, if I were you, Lowndes. They’ll hate you quite enough under any circumstances.’

‘So that young prince, having learned all the bad habits of the English, will waste money and ruin ten years of work in just eighteen months. I've seen this happen before,’ said Spurstow. ‘I would approach the king gently if I were you, Lowndes. They’ll dislike you enough no matter what.’

‘That’s all very well. The man who looks on can talk about the light hand; but you can’t clean a pig-stye with a pen dipped in rose-water. I know my risks; but nothing has happened yet. My servant’s an old Pathan, and he cooks for me. They are hardly likely to bribe him, and I don’t accept food from my true friends, as they call themselves. Oh, but it’s weary work! I’d sooner be with you, Spurstow. There’s shooting near your camp.’

‘That’s all well and good. The guy who just watches can talk about taking it easy; but you can’t clean a pigsty with a pen dipped in perfume. I know the risks I’m taking; but nothing has happened so far. My servant is an old Pathan, and he cooks for me. They’re not likely to bribe him, and I don’t take food from my so-called friends. Oh, but it’s exhausting! I’d rather be with you, Spurstow. There’s shooting close to your camp.’

‘Would you? I don’t think it. About fifteen deaths a day don’t incite a man to shoot anything but himself. And the worst of it is that the poor devils look at you as though you ought to save them. Lord knows, I’ve tried everything. My last attempt was empirical, but it pulled an old man through. He was brought to me apparently past hope, and I gave him gin and Worcester sauce with cayenne. It cured him; but I don’t recommend it.’

‘Would you? I don’t think so. About fifteen deaths a day don’t motivate anyone to aim a gun at anything but themselves. The worst part is that those poor souls look at you like you should be able to save them. God knows, I’ve tried everything. My last effort was based on experience, but it actually helped an old man. He came to me looking hopeless, and I gave him gin and Worcester sauce with cayenne. It worked for him, but I wouldn’t suggest it.’

‘How do the cases run generally?’ said Hummil.

‘How do the cases usually go?’ said Hummil.

‘Very simply indeed. Chlorodyne, opium pill, chlorodyne, collapse, nitre, bricks to the feet, and then—the burning-ghat. The last seems to be the only thing that stops the trouble. It’s black cholera, you know. Poor devils! But, I will say, little Bunsee Lal, my apothecary, works like a demon. I’ve recommended him for promotion if he comes through it all alive.’

‘Very simple indeed. Chlorodyne, opium pill, chlorodyne, collapse, nitre, bricks to the feet, and then—the burning-ghat. The last seems to be the only thing that stops the trouble. It’s black cholera, you know. Poor souls! But I have to say, little Bunsee Lal, my pharmacist, works like a demon. I’ve recommended him for a promotion if he makes it through all this alive.’

‘And what are your chances, old man?’ said Mottram.

‘So, what are your chances, old man?’ said Mottram.

‘Don’t know; don’t care much; but I’ve sent the letter in. What are you doing with yourself generally?’

‘Don’t know; don’t really care; but I’ve sent the letter in. What have you been up to lately?’

‘Sitting under a table in the tent and spitting on the sextant to keep it cool,’ said the man of the survey. ‘Washing my eyes to avoid ophthalmia, which I shall certainly get, and trying to make a sub-surveyor understand that an error of five degrees in an angle isn’t quite so small as it looks. I’m altogether alone, y’ know, and shall be till the end of the hot weather.’

‘Sitting under a table in the tent and spitting on the sextant to keep it cool,’ said the surveyor. ‘Washing my eyes to avoid eye infections, which I'm definitely going to get, and trying to explain to a sub-surveyor that a five-degree error in an angle isn't as small as it seems. I'm completely alone, you know, and I will be until the end of the hot weather.’

‘Hummil’s the lucky man,’ said Lowndes, flinging himself into a long chair. ‘He has an actual roof—torn as to the ceiling-cloth, but still a roof—over his head. He sees one train daily. He can get beer and soda-water and ice ‘em when God is good. He has books, pictures,—-they were torn from the Graphic,—‘and the society of the excellent sub-contractor Jevins, besides the pleasure of receiving us weekly.’

‘Hummil's the lucky guy,’ said Lowndes, throwing himself into a lounge chair. ‘He actually has a roof—though the ceiling cloth is ripped, it's still a roof—over his head. He sees one train every day. He can get beer and soda, and ice them when the heavens allow. He has books and pictures—they were torn from the Graphic—and the company of the great sub-contractor Jevins, along with the joy of having us over weekly.’

Hummil smiled grimly. ‘Yes, I’m the lucky man, I suppose. Jevins is luckier.’

Hummil smiled wryly. “Yeah, I guess I’m the lucky one. Jevins is luckier.”

‘How? Not——’

‘How? No way——’

‘Yes. Went out. Last Monday.’

"Yeah. Went out last Monday."

‘By his own hand?’ said Spurstow quickly, hinting the suspicion that was in everybody’s mind. There was no cholera near Hummil’s section. Even fever gives a man at least a week’s grace, and sudden death generally implied self-slaughter.

‘By his own hand?’ Spurstow asked quickly, suggesting the suspicion that was in everyone’s mind. There was no cholera near Hummil’s area. Even fever gives a person at least a week’s grace, and sudden death usually implied suicide.

‘I judge no man this weather,’ said Hummil. ‘He had a touch of the sun, I fancy; for last week, after you fellows had left, he came into the verandah and told me that he was going home to see his wife, in Market Street, Liverpool, that evening.

‘I don’t judge anyone in this weather,’ said Hummil. ‘He seemed a bit out of it, I think; because last week, after you guys had left, he came onto the porch and told me he was going home to see his wife on Market Street, Liverpool, that evening.'

‘I got the apothecary in to look at him, and we tried to make him lie down. After an hour or two he rubbed his eyes and said he believed he had had a fit,—hoped he hadn’t said anything rude. Jevins had a great idea of bettering himself socially. He was very like Chucks in his language.’

‘I called the pharmacist to check on him, and we tried to get him to lie down. After an hour or two, he rubbed his eyes and said he thought he had a seizure—hoping he hadn’t said anything offensive. Jevins was really focused on improving his social status. He spoke in a way that was quite similar to Chucks.’

‘Well?’

‘So?’

‘Then he went to his own bungalow and began cleaning a rifle. He told the servant that he was going to shoot buck in the morning. Naturally he fumbled with the trigger, and shot himself through the head—accidentally. The apothecary sent in a report to my chief, and Jevins is buried somewhere out there. I’d have wired to you, Spurstow, if you could have done anything.’

‘Then he went to his bungalow and started cleaning a rifle. He told the servant that he was planning to shoot deer in the morning. Naturally, he fumbled with the trigger and accidentally shot himself in the head. The pharmacist sent a report to my boss, and Jevins is buried somewhere out there. I would have messaged you, Spurstow, if you could have done anything.’

‘You’re a queer chap,’ said Mottram. ‘If you’d killed the man yourself you couldn’t have been more quiet about the business.’

‘You’re an odd guy,’ said Mottram. ‘If you’d killed the man yourself, you couldn’t have been any quieter about it.’

‘Good Lord! what does it matter?’ said Hummil calmly. ‘I’ve got to do a lot of his overseeing work in addition to my own. I’m the only person that suffers. Jevins is out of it,—by pure accident, of course, but out of it. The apothecary was going to write a long screed on suicide. Trust a babu to drivel when he gets the chance.’

‘Good Lord! What does it matter?’ Hummil said calmly. ‘I have to handle a lot of his overseeing work on top of my own. I’m the only one who suffers. Jevins is off the hook—by pure chance, of course, but still off the hook. The apothecary was going to write a long rant about suicide. Just trust a babu to ramble when he gets the chance.’

‘Why didn’t you let it go in as suicide?’ said Lowndes.

“Why didn’t you just call it a suicide?” said Lowndes.

‘No direct proof. A man hasn’t many privileges in this country, but he might at least be allowed to mishandle his own rifle. Besides, some day I may need a man to smother up an accident to myself. Live and let live. Die and let die.’

‘No direct proof. A guy doesn’t have many rights in this country, but he should at least be allowed to mess up his own rifle. Plus, someday I might need someone to cover up an accident for me. Live and let live. Die and let die.’

‘You take a pill,’ said Spurstow, who had been watching Hummil’s white face narrowly. ‘Take a pill, and don’t be an ass. That sort of talk is skittles. Anyhow, suicide is shirking your work. If I were Job ten times over, I should be so interested in what was going to happen next that I’d stay on and watch.’

‘You take a pill,’ Spurstow said, closely observing Hummil’s pale face. ‘Take a pill, and don’t be stupid. That kind of talk is nonsense. Besides, suicide is avoiding your responsibilities. If I were Job ten times over, I’d be so curious about what was going to happen next that I’d stick around and watch.’

‘Ah! I’ve lost that curiosity,’ said Hummil.

‘Ah! I’ve lost that curiosity,’ Hummil said.

‘Liver out of order?’ said Lowndes feelingly.

“Liver acting up?” said Lowndes thoughtfully.

‘No. Can’t sleep. That’s worse.’

"Can't sleep. That's worse."

‘By Jove, it is!’ said Mottram. ‘I’m that way every now and then, and the fit has to wear itself out. What do you take for it?’

‘By Jove, it is!’ said Mottram. ‘I feel that way sometimes, and it just has to run its course. What do you do for it?’

‘Nothing. What’s the use? I haven’t had ten minutes’ sleep since Friday morning.’

‘Nothing. What's the point? I haven't gotten ten minutes of sleep since Friday morning.’

‘Poor chap! Spurstow, you ought to attend to this,’ said Mottram. ‘Now you mention it, your eyes are rather gummy and swollen.’

‘Poor guy! Spurstow, you should take care of this,’ said Mottram. ‘Now that you mention it, your eyes look a bit puffy and swollen.’

Spurstow, still watching Hummil, laughed lightly. ‘I’ll patch him up, later on. Is it too hot, do you think, to go for a ride?’

Spurstow, still watching Hummil, chuckled softly. ‘I’ll fix him up later. Do you think it’s too hot to go for a ride?’

‘Where to?’ said Lowndes wearily. ‘We shall have to go away at eight, and there’ll be riding enough for us then. I hate a horse, when I have to use him as a necessity. Oh, heavens! what is there to do?’

‘Where to?’ Lowndes said wearily. ‘We’ll have to leave at eight, and that’ll be plenty of riding for us then. I hate riding a horse when I have to do it for necessity. Oh, come on! What is there to do?’

‘Begin whist again, at chick points [‘a chick’ is supposed to be eight shillings] and a gold mohur on the rub,’ said Spurstow promptly.

‘Start whist again, at chick points [‘a chick’ is meant to be eight shillings] and a gold mohur on the rub,’ said Spurstow immediately.

‘Poker. A month’s pay all round for the pool,—no limit,—and fifty-rupee raises. Somebody would be broken before we got up,’ said Lowndes.

‘Poker. A month’s salary all around for the pot—no limit—and fifty-rupee raises. Someone’s going to lose everything before we leave,’ said Lowndes.

‘Can’t say that it would give me any pleasure to break any man in this company,’ said Mottram. ‘There isn’t enough excitement in it, and it’s foolish.’ He crossed over to the worn and battered little camp-piano,—wreckage of a married household that had once held the bungalow,—and opened the case.

“Can’t say it would make me happy to bring down any guy in this company,” Mottram said. “There’s not enough thrill in it, and it’s just dumb.” He walked over to the old and beaten-up little camp piano—the remnants of a married couple’s life that once filled the bungalow—and opened the case.

‘It’s used up long ago,’ said Hummil. ‘The servants have picked it to pieces.’

‘It was used up a long time ago,’ said Hummil. ‘The servants have picked it apart.’

The piano was indeed hopelessly out of order, but Mottram managed to bring the rebellious notes into a sort of agreement, and there rose from the ragged keyboard something that might once have been the ghost of a popular music-hall song. The men in the long chairs turned with evident interest as Mottram banged the more lustily.

The piano was clearly in terrible shape, but Mottram somehow got the stubborn keys to cooperate, and from the worn-out keyboard came a sound that might have once been the spirit of a popular music-hall tune. The men in the long chairs turned with clear interest as Mottram played more energetically.

‘That’s good!’ said Lowndes. ‘By Jove! the last time I heard that song was in ‘79, or thereabouts, just before I came out.’

‘That’s great!’ said Lowndes. ‘Wow! The last time I heard that song was in ‘79 or around then, just before I came out.’

‘Ah!’ said Spurstow with pride,’ I was home in ‘80.’ And he mentioned a song of the streets popular at that date.

‘Ah!’ said Spurstow proudly, ‘I was home in ‘80.’ And he brought up a street song that was popular at that time.

Mottram executed it roughly. Lowndes criticised and volunteered emendations. Mottram dashed into another ditty, not of the music-hall character, and made as if to rise.

Mottram did it clumsily. Lowndes pointed out flaws and offered suggestions. Mottram quickly started another song, not one from the music hall, and acted like he was about to get up.

‘Sit down,’ said Hummil. ‘I didn’t know that you had any music in your composition. Go on playing until you can’t think of anything more. I’ll have that piano tuned up before you come again. Play something festive.’

‘Sit down,’ said Hummil. ‘I didn’t know you had any music in your composition. Keep playing until you can’t think of anything else. I’ll get that piano tuned up before you come back. Play something cheerful.’

Very simple indeed were the tunes to which Mottram’s art and the limitations of the piano could give effect, but the men listened with pleasure, and in the pauses talked all together of what they had seen or heard when they were last at home. A dense dust-storm sprung up outside, and swept roaring over the house, enveloping it in the choking darkness of midnight, but Mottram continued unheeding, and the crazy tinkle reached the ears of the listeners above the flapping of the tattered ceiling-cloth.

The tunes Mottram played were really simple, but the guys enjoyed listening, and during the breaks, they chatted about what they had seen or heard the last time they were home. A thick dust storm kicked up outside and roared over the house, wrapping it in the suffocating darkness of midnight, but Mottram kept playing without a care, and the crazy tinkling could be heard by the listeners over the sound of the flapping, worn-out ceiling cloth.

In the silence after the storm he glided from the more directly personal songs of Scotland, half humming them as he played, into the Evening Hymn.

In the quiet after the storm, he smoothly transitioned from the more personal songs of Scotland, partially humming them as he played, into the Evening Hymn.

‘Sunday,’ said he, nodding his head.

‘Sunday,’ he said, nodding his head.

‘Go on. Don’t apologise for it,’ said Spurstow.

‘Go ahead. Don’t apologize for it,’ said Spurstow.

Hummil laughed long and riotously. ‘Play it, by all means. You’re full of surprises to-day. I didn’t know you had such a gift of finished sarcasm. How does that thing go?’

Hummil laughed loudly and heartily. 'Go ahead and play it. You're full of surprises today. I didn't know you could be so skillfully sarcastic. How does that go?'

Mottram took up the tune.

Mottram started playing the tune.

‘Too slow by half. You miss the note of gratitude,’ said Hummil. ‘It ought to go to the “Grasshopper’s Polka,”—this way.’ And he chanted, prestissimo,—

‘Way too slow. You’re missing the gratitude,’ said Hummil. ‘It should be set to the “Grasshopper’s Polka,”—like this.’ And he sang, prestissimo,—

‘Glory to thee, my God, this night. For all the blessings of the light.

‘Glory to you, my God, tonight. For all the blessings of the light.

That shows we really feel our blessings. How does it go on?—

That shows we truly appreciate our blessings. What happens next?—

‘If in the night I sleepless lie, My soul with sacred thoughts supply; May no ill dreams disturb my rest.’—

‘If I lie awake at night, fill my soul with sacred thoughts; may no bad dreams disturb my rest.’—

Quicker, Mottram!—

Hurry up, Mottram!—

‘Or powers of darkness me molest!’

‘Or powers of darkness, leave me alone!’

‘Bah! what an old hypocrite you are!’

‘Ugh! What a phony you are!’

‘Don’t be an ass,’ said Lowndes. ‘You are at full liberty to make fun of anything else you like, but leave that hymn alone. It’s associated in my mind with the most sacred recollections——’

‘Don’t be a jerk,’ said Lowndes. ‘You can make fun of whatever else you want, but leave that hymn alone. It’s connected in my mind with the most sacred memories——’

‘Summer evenings in the country,—stained-glass window,—light going out, and you and she jamming your heads together over one hymn-book,’ said Mottram.

‘Summer evenings in the countryside—stained-glass window—light fading, and you and she pushing your heads together over one hymn book,’ said Mottram.

‘Yes, and a fat old cockchafer hitting you in the eye when you walked home. Smell of hay, and a moon as big as a bandbox sitting on the top of a haycock; bats,—roses,—milk and midges,’ said Lowndes.

‘Yeah, and a big old bug hitting you in the eye while you were walking home. The smell of hay, and a moon as big as a hatbox sitting on top of a haystack; bats,—roses,—milk and bugs,’ said Lowndes.

‘Also mothers. I can just recollect my mother singing me to sleep with that when I was a little chap,’ said Spurstow.

‘Also mothers. I can just remember my mom singing me to sleep with that when I was a little kid,’ said Spurstow.

The darkness had fallen on the room. They could hear Hummil squirming in his chair.

The darkness had settled over the room. They could hear Hummil shifting in his chair.

‘Consequently,’ said he testily, ‘you sing it when you are seven fathom deep in Hell! It’s an insult to the intelligence of the Deity to pretend we’re anything but tortured rebels.’

‘So,’ he said irritably, ‘you can sing it when you’re seven fathoms deep in Hell! It’s an insult to God to pretend we’re anything but tormented rebels.’

‘Take TWO pills,’ said Spurstow; ‘that’s tortured liver.’

‘Take two pills,’ said Spurstow; ‘that's a tortured liver.’

‘The usually placid Hummil is in a vile bad temper. I’m sorry for his coolies to-morrow,’ said Lowndes, as the servants brought in the lights and prepared the table for dinner.

‘The usually calm Hummil is in a really bad mood. I feel sorry for his workers tomorrow,’ said Lowndes, as the staff brought in the lights and set the table for dinner.

As they were settling into their places about the miserable goat-chops, and the smoked tapioca pudding, Spurstow took occasion to whisper to Mottram, ‘Well done, David!’

As they were getting comfortable around the awful goat chops and the smoked tapioca pudding, Spurstow took the opportunity to whisper to Mottram, “Good job, David!”

‘Look after Saul, then,’ was the reply.

‘Take care of Saul, then,’ was the reply.

‘What are you two whispering about?’ said Hummil suspiciously.

‘What are you two whispering about?’ Hummil asked suspiciously.

‘Only saying that you are a damned poor host. This fowl can’t be cut,’ returned Spurstow with a sweet smile. ‘Call this a dinner?’

‘You're just saying that you're a terrible host. This chicken can't be carved,’ replied Spurstow with a charming smile. ‘Is this really a dinner?’

‘I can’t help it. You don’t expect a banquet, do you?’

‘I can’t help it. You don’t expect a feast, do you?’

Throughout that meal Hummil contrived laboriously to insult directly and pointedly all his guests in succession, and at each insult Spurstow kicked the aggrieved persons under the table; but he dared not exchange a glance of intelligence with either of them. Hummil’s face was white and pinched, while his eyes were unnaturally large. No man dreamed for a moment of resenting his savage personalities, but as soon as the meal was over they made haste to get away. ‘Don’t go. You’re just getting amusing, you fellows. I hope I haven’t said anything that annoyed you. You’re such touchy devils.’ Then, changing the note into one of almost abject entreaty, Hummil added, ‘I say, you surely aren’t going?’

Throughout that meal, Hummil worked hard to insult each of his guests one by one, and with every insult, Spurstow discreetly kicked the offended people under the table; however, he didn’t dare to share a knowing glance with either of them. Hummil’s face was pale and gaunt, while his eyes looked unnaturally wide. No one dared to take offense at his harsh remarks, but as soon as the meal ended, they hurried to leave. “Don’t go. You’re just starting to be fun, you guys. I hope I didn’t say anything that upset you. You’re such sensitive people.” Then, shifting to a tone of near desperation, Hummil added, “Wait, you really aren’t leaving, are you?”

‘In the language of the blessed Jorrocks, where I dines I sleeps,’ said Spurstow. ‘I want to have a look at your coolies to-morrow, if you don’t mind. You can give me a place to lie down in, I suppose?’

‘In the words of the blessed Jorrocks, where I eat, I sleep,’ said Spurstow. ‘I’d like to check out your coolies tomorrow, if that’s okay. You can probably give me a place to crash, right?’

The others pleaded the urgency of their several duties next day, and, saddling up, departed together, Hummil begging them to come next Sunday. As they jogged off, Lowndes unbosomed himself to Mottram—

The others emphasized how urgent their various responsibilities were for the next day, and after getting their horses ready, they left together, with Hummil asking them to come back next Sunday. As they rode away, Lowndes opened up to Mottram—

‘... And I never felt so like kicking a man at his own table in my life. He said I cheated at whist, and reminded me I was in debt! ‘Told you you were as good as a liar to your face! You aren’t half indignant enough over it.’

‘... And I've never felt more like kicking a guy at his own table in my life. He accused me of cheating at whist and reminded me that I owe him money! "Told you, you were nothing but a liar right to your face! You aren’t nearly indignant enough about it."’

‘Not I,’ said Mottram. ‘Poor devil! Did you ever know old Hummy behave like that before or within a hundred miles of it?’

‘Not me,’ said Mottram. ‘Poor guy! Have you ever seen old Hummy act like that before or anywhere close to it?’

‘That’s no excuse. Spurstow was hacking my shin all the time, so I kept a hand on myself. Else I should have—’

‘That’s not an excuse. Spurstow was kicking my shin constantly, so I had to keep my cool. Otherwise, I would have—’

‘No, you wouldn’t. You’d have done as Hummy did about Jevins; judge no man this weather. By Jove! the buckle of my bridle is hot in my hand! Trot out a bit, and ‘ware rat-holes.’

‘No, you wouldn’t. You’d have acted like Hummy did with Jevins; don’t judge anyone in this weather. By Jove! the buckle of my bridle is hot in my hand! Let’s trot out a bit, and watch out for rat-holes.’

Ten minutes’ trotting jerked out of Lowndes one very sage remark when he pulled up, sweating from every pore—

Ten minutes of jogging got Lowndes to make one very wise comment when he stopped, sweating from every pore—

‘’Good thing Spurstow’s with him to-night.’

‘’Good thing Spurstow’s with him tonight.’’’

‘Ye-es. Good man, Spurstow. Our roads turn here. See you again next Sunday, if the sun doesn’t bowl me over.’

‘Yeah. Good man, Spurstow. Our paths split here. See you again next Sunday, if the sun doesn’t knock me out.’

‘S’pose so, unless old Timbersides’ finance minister manages to dress some of my food. Good-night, and—God bless you!’

‘I suppose so, unless old Timbersides’ finance minister manages to spice up some of my food. Good night, and—bless you!’

‘What’s wrong now?’

"What's wrong this time?"

‘Oh, nothing.’ Lowndes gathered up his whip, and, as he flicked Mottram’s mare on the flank, added, ‘You’re not a bad little chap,—that’s all.’ And the mare bolted half a mile across the sand, on the word.

‘Oh, nothing.’ Lowndes picked up his whip, and, as he gave Mottram’s mare a quick flick on the flank, added, ‘You’re not a bad little guy—that’s all.’ And the mare took off, running half a mile across the sand, just from that.

In the assistant engineer’s bungalow Spurstow and Hummil smoked the pipe of silence together, each narrowly watching the other. The capacity of a bachelor’s establishment is as elastic as its arrangements are simple. A servant cleared away the dining-room table, brought in a couple of rude native bedsteads made of tape strung on a light wood frame, flung a square of cool Calcutta matting over each, set them side by side, pinned two towels to the punkah so that their fringes should just sweep clear of the sleepers’ nose and mouth, and announced that the couches were ready.

In the assistant engineer’s bungalow, Spurstow and Hummil sat in silence, each watching the other closely. The setup of a bachelor’s home is as flexible as its arrangements are straightforward. A servant cleared the dining room table, brought in a couple of basic native beds made of tape stretched over a light wood frame, tossed a square of cool Calcutta matting over each one, placed them side by side, pinned two towels to the ceiling fan so that their fringes just brushed past the sleepers’ nose and mouth, and said that the beds were ready.

The men flung themselves down, ordering the punkah-coolies by all the powers of Hell to pull. Every door and window was shut, for the outside air was that of an oven. The atmosphere within was only 104 degrees, as the thermometer bore witness, and heavy with the foul smell of badly-trimmed kerosene lamps; and this stench, combined with that of native tobacco, baked brick, and dried earth, sends the heart of many a strong man down to his boots, for it is the smell of the Great Indian Empire when she turns herself for six months into a house of torment. Spurstow packed his pillows craftily so that he reclined rather than lay, his head at a safe elevation above his feet. It is not good to sleep on a low pillow in the hot weather if you happen to be of thick-necked build, for you may pass with lively snores and gugglings from natural sleep into the deep slumber of heat-apoplexy.

The men threw themselves down, shouting at the punkah-coolies with all the energy they could muster to pull. Every door and window was closed because the outside air felt like an oven. The temperature inside was only 104 degrees, as the thermometer showed, and it was heavy with the awful smell of poorly trimmed kerosene lamps; this odor, mixed with native tobacco, dried brick, and earth, can make even the strongest man feel weak, as it represents the Great Indian Empire when it turns into a torturous oven for six months. Spurstow arranged his pillows cleverly so that he was reclining rather than lying flat, with his head elevated safely above his feet. It’s not wise to sleep on a low pillow in the heat if you have a thick neck, as you might snore loudly and suddenly shift from natural sleep into the deep slumber of heat stroke.

‘Pack your pillows,’ said the doctor sharply, as he saw Hummil preparing to lie down at full length.

‘Pack your pillows,’ the doctor said sternly, as he saw Hummil getting ready to lie down flat.

The night-light was trimmed; the shadow of the punkah wavered across the room, and the ‘flick’ of the punkah-towel and the soft whine of the rope through the wall-hole followed it. Then the punkah flagged, almost ceased. The sweat poured from Spurstow’s brow. Should he go out and harangue the coolie? It started forward again with a savage jerk, and a pin came out of the towels. When this was replaced, a tomtom in the coolie-lines began to beat with the steady throb of a swollen artery inside some brain-fevered skull. Spurstow turned on his side and swore gently. There was no movement on Hummil’s part. The man had composed himself as rigidly as a corpse, his hands clinched at his sides. The respiration was too hurried for any suspicion of sleep. Spurstow looked at the set face. The jaws were clinched, and there was a pucker round the quivering eyelids.

The night-light was adjusted; the shadow of the fan flickered across the room, and the 'flick' of the fan towel along with the soft whine of the rope through the wall hole followed it. Then the fan slowed down, almost stopping. Sweat poured down Spurstow’s forehead. Should he go outside and confront the laborer? It started moving again with a sudden jerk, and a pin came loose from the towels. Once this was fixed, a drum in the laborer’s area began to beat with the steady pulse of a swollen artery inside some fevered brain. Spurstow turned onto his side and muttered under his breath. There was no movement from Hummil. The man lay as stiff as a corpse, his hands clenched at his sides. His breathing was too rapid for any sign of sleep. Spurstow looked at the rigid face. The jaw was tight, and there was a twitch around the quivering eyelids.

‘He’s holding himself as tightly as ever he can,’ thought Spurstow. ‘What in the world is the matter with him?—Hummil!’

‘He’s holding himself as tightly as he can,’ thought Spurstow. ‘What’s wrong with him?—Hummil!’

‘Yes,’ in a thick constrained voice.

‘Yes,’ in a heavy, strained voice.

‘Can’t you get to sleep?’

“Can’t you fall asleep?”

‘No.’

'No.'

‘Head hot? ‘Throat feeling bulgy? or how?’

‘Is your head hot? Does your throat feel tight? How do you feel?’

‘Neither, thanks. I don’t sleep much, you know.’

‘No, thanks. I don’t sleep much, you know.’

‘Feel pretty bad?’

"Feeling pretty bad?"

‘Pretty bad, thanks. There is a tomtom outside, isn’t there? I thought it was my head at first.... Oh, Spurstow, for pity’s sake give me something that will put me asleep,—sound asleep,—if it’s only for six hours!’ He sprang up, trembling from head to foot. ‘I haven’t been able to sleep naturally for days, and I can’t stand it!—I can’t stand it!’

‘Pretty bad, thanks. There’s a GPS device outside, right? I thought it was just my imagination at first... Oh, Spurstow, please give me something that will knock me out—completely knocked out—if it’s only for six hours!’ He jumped up, shaking all over. ‘I haven’t been able to sleep properly for days, and I can’t take it!—I can’t take it!’

‘Poor old chap!’

‘Poor guy!’

‘That’s no use. Give me something to make me sleep. I tell you I’m nearly mad. I don’t know what I say half my time. For three weeks I’ve had to think and spell out every word that has come through my lips before I dared say it. Isn’t that enough to drive a man mad? I can’t see things correctly now, and I’ve lost my sense of touch. My skin aches—my skin aches! Make me sleep. Oh, Spurstow, for the love of God make me sleep sound. It isn’t enough merely to let me dream. Let me sleep!’

‘That’s useless. Give me something to help me sleep. I’m telling you, I’m almost losing my mind. I don’t even know what I’m saying half the time. For three weeks, I’ve had to think through and spell out every single word that comes out of my mouth before I could say it. Isn’t that enough to drive someone crazy? I can’t see things clearly anymore, and I’ve lost my sense of touch. My skin hurts—my skin hurts! Make me sleep. Oh, Spurstow, for the love of God, help me sleep deeply. It's not enough just to let me dream. Let me sleep!’

‘All right, old man, all right. Go slow; you aren’t half as bad as you think.’

‘All right, old man, all right. Take it easy; you’re not nearly as bad as you think.’

The flood-gates of reserve once broken, Hummil was clinging to him like a frightened child. ‘You’re pinching my arm to pieces.’

The floodgates of restraint once broken, Hummil was holding onto him like a scared child. ‘You’re pinching my arm to bits.’

‘I’ll break your neck if you don’t do something for me. No, I didn’t mean that. Don’t be angry, old fellow.’ He wiped the sweat off himself as he fought to regain composure. ‘I’m a bit restless and off my oats, and perhaps you could recommend some sort of sleeping mixture,—bromide of potassium.’

‘I’ll break your neck if you don’t do something for me. No, I didn’t mean that. Don’t be mad, buddy.’ He wiped the sweat off himself as he struggled to calm down. ‘I’m feeling a bit uneasy and off my game, so maybe you could suggest some kind of sleeping aid—like potassium bromide.’

‘Bromide of skittles! Why didn’t you tell me this before? Let go of my arm, and I’ll see if there’s anything in my cigarette-case to suit your complaint.’ Spurstow hunted among his day-clothes, turned up the lamp, opened a little silver cigarette-case, and advanced on the expectant Hummil with the daintiest of fairy squirts.

‘Bromide of skittles! Why didn’t you tell me this earlier? Let go of my arm, and I’ll check if there’s anything in my cigarette case to help with your issue.’ Spurstow rummaged through his day clothes, turned on the lamp, opened a small silver cigarette case, and approached the eager Hummil with the daintiest little fairy spray.

‘The last appeal of civilisation,’ said he, ‘and a thing I hate to use. Hold out your arm. Well, your sleeplessness hasn’t ruined your muscle; and what a thick hide it is! Might as well inject a buffalo subcutaneously. Now in a few minutes the morphia will begin working. Lie down and wait.’

‘The final resort of civilization,’ he said, ‘and something I really dislike using. Hold out your arm. Well, your lack of sleep hasn’t affected your strength; and what tough skin you have! Might as well be injecting a buffalo under the skin. Now in a few minutes, the morphine will start to take effect. Lie down and wait.’

A smile of unalloyed and idiotic delight began to creep over Hummil’s face. ‘I think,’ he whispered,—‘I think I’m going off now. Gad! it’s positively heavenly! Spurstow, you must give me that case to keep; you—’ The voice ceased as the head fell back.

A smile of pure and silly joy began to spread across Hummil’s face. ‘I think,’ he whispered, ‘I think I’m about to pass out now. Wow! It’s truly amazing! Spurstow, you have to let me keep that case; you—’ The voice trailed off as his head fell back.

‘Not for a good deal,’ said Spurstow to the unconscious form. ‘And now, my friend, sleeplessness of your kind being very apt to relax the moral fibre in little matters of life and death, I’ll just take the liberty of spiking your guns.’

‘Not for a good deal,’ Spurstow said to the unconscious person. ‘And now, my friend, since your kind of sleeplessness tends to weaken your sense of right and wrong in small matters of life and death, I’ll just take the liberty of disabling your weapons.’

He paddled into Hummil’s saddle-room in his bare feet and uncased a twelve-bore rifle, an express, and a revolver. Of the first he unscrewed the nipples and hid them in the bottom of a saddlery-case; of the second he abstracted the lever, kicking it behind a big wardrobe. The third he merely opened, and knocked the doll-head bolt of the grip up with the heel of a riding-boot.

He walked into Hummil’s saddle room barefoot and took out a twelve-bore shotgun, an express rifle, and a revolver. For the shotgun, he unscrewed the nipples and tucked them away in the bottom of a saddlery case; for the express rifle, he removed the lever and kicked it behind a large wardrobe. He simply opened the revolver and used the heel of a riding boot to knock the doll-head bolt of the grip up.

‘That’s settled,’ he said, as he shook the sweat off his hands. ‘These little precautions will at least give you time to turn. You have too much sympathy with gun-room accidents.’

‘That’s settled,’ he said, shaking the sweat off his hands. ‘These little precautions will at least give you time to turn. You have too much sympathy for gun-room accidents.’

And as he rose from his knees, the thick muffled voice of Hummil cried in the doorway, ‘You fool!’

And as he got up from his knees, Hummil's deep voice shouted from the doorway, 'You fool!'

Such tones they use who speak in the lucid intervals of delirium to their friends a little before they die.

Such tones are used by those who speak clearly during moments of delirium to their friends shortly before they pass away.

Spurstow started, dropping the pistol. Hummil stood in the doorway, rocking with helpless laughter.

Spurstow jumped, dropping the gun. Hummil stood in the doorway, shaking with uncontrollable laughter.

‘That was awf’ly good of you, I’m sure,’ he said, very slowly, feeling for his words. ‘I don’t intend to go out by my own hand at present. I say, Spurstow, that stuff won’t work. What shall I do? What shall I do?’ And panic terror stood in his eyes.

‘That was really nice of you, I’m sure,’ he said, very slowly, searching for his words. ‘I don't plan to end my life right now. I mean, Spurstow, that stuff won't help. What should I do? What should I do?’ And sheer panic was evident in his eyes.

‘Lie down and give it a chance. Lie down at once.’

‘Lie down and give it a chance. Lie down now.’

‘I daren’t. It will only take me half-way again, and I shan’t be able to get away this time. Do you know it was all I could do to come out just now? Generally I am as quick as lightning; but you had clogged my feet. I was nearly caught.’

‘I can’t. It will only take me halfway again, and I won’t be able to escape this time. Do you realize it took everything I had to come out just now? Usually, I’m really fast; but you held me back. I almost got caught.’

‘Oh yes, I understand. Go and lie down.’

‘Oh yeah, I get it. Go ahead and rest.’

‘No, it isn’t delirium; but it was an awfully mean trick to play on me. Do you know I might have died?’

‘No, it's not delirium; but it was a really cruel trick to pull on me. Do you realize I could have died?’

As a sponge rubs a slate clean, so some power unknown to Spurstow had wiped out of Hummil’s face all that stamped it for the face of a man, and he stood at the doorway in the expression of his lost innocence. He had slept back into terrified childhood.

As a sponge wipes a slate clean, some unknown power had erased from Hummil's face everything that marked it as human, and he stood in the doorway with the expression of his lost innocence. He had regressed into a state of terrified childhood.

‘Is he going to die on the spot?’ thought Spurstow. Then, aloud, ‘All right, my son. Come back to bed, and tell me all about it. You couldn’t sleep; but what was all the rest of the nonsense?’

‘Is he going to die right here?’ thought Spurstow. Then, aloud, ‘Okay, my son. Come back to bed and tell me everything. You couldn’t sleep, but what was all that other nonsense?’

‘A place,—a place down there,’ said Hummil, with simple sincerity. The drug was acting on him by waves, and he was flung from the fear of a strong man to the fright of a child as his nerves gathered sense or were dulled.

‘A place,—a place down there,’ said Hummil, with genuine sincerity. The drug was affecting him in waves, and he was thrown from the fear of a strong man to the terror of a child as his nerves either sharpened or were numbed.

‘Good God! I’ve been afraid of it for months past, Spurstow. It has made every night hell to me; and yet I’m not conscious of having done anything wrong.’

‘Good God! I’ve been scared of it for months now, Spurstow. It has turned every night into a nightmare for me; and yet I’m not aware of having done anything wrong.’

‘Be still, and I’ll give you another dose. We’ll stop your nightmares, you unutterable idiot!’

‘Be quiet, and I’ll give you another dose. We’ll put an end to your nightmares, you absolute fool!’

‘Yes, but you must give me so much that I can’t get away. You must make me quite sleepy,—not just a little sleepy. It’s so hard to run then.’

‘Yes, but you have to give me so much that I won’t be able to escape. You need to make me really sleepy—not just a little sleepy. It’s way too hard to run like that.’

‘I know it; I know it. I’ve felt it myself. The symptoms are exactly as you describe.’

‘I know it; I know it. I’ve experienced it too. The symptoms are exactly how you described them.’

‘Oh, don’t laugh at me, confound you! Before this awful sleeplessness came to me I’ve tried to rest on my elbow and put a spur in the bed to sting me when I fell back. Look!’

‘Oh, don’t laugh at me, damn you! Before this terrible sleeplessness hit me, I tried to rest on my elbow and put something sharp in the bed to jab me when I dozed off. Look!’

‘By Jove! the man has been rowelled like a horse! Ridden by the nightmare with a vengeance! And we all thought him sensible enough. Heaven send us understanding! You like to talk, don’t you?’

‘By Jove! The man has been spurred like a horse! Haunted by the nightmare for sure! And we all thought he was sensible enough. God help us to understand! You love to chat, don’t you?’

‘Yes, sometimes. Not when I’m frightened. THEN I want to run. Don’t you?’

‘Yeah, sometimes. Not when I’m scared. THEN I want to run. Don’t you?’

‘Always. Before I give you your second dose try to tell me exactly what your trouble is.’

‘Always. Before I give you your second dose, try to tell me exactly what your issue is.’

Hummil spoke in broken whispers for nearly ten minutes, whilst Spurstow looked into the pupils of his eyes and passed his hand before them once or twice.

Hummil spoke in hushed whispers for almost ten minutes, while Spurstow looked into his eyes and waved his hand in front of them a couple of times.

At the end of the narrative the silver cigarette-case was produced, and the last words that Hummil said as he fell back for the second time were, ‘Put me quite to sleep; for if I’m caught I die,—I die!’

At the end of the story, the silver cigarette case was brought out, and the last words Hummil said as he fell back for the second time were, ‘Put me completely to sleep; because if I’m caught, I die—I die!’

‘Yes, yes; we all do that sooner or later,—thank Heaven who has set a term to our miseries,’ said Spurstow, settling the cushions under the head. ‘It occurs to me that unless I drink something I shall go out before my time. I’ve stopped sweating, and—I wear a seventeen-inch collar.’ He brewed himself scalding hot tea, which is an excellent remedy against heat-apoplexy if you take three or four cups of it in time. Then he watched the sleeper.

‘Yeah, we all end up doing that sooner or later—thank God there's an end to our suffering,’ said Spurstow, adjusting the cushions under his head. ‘It just hit me that if I don’t drink something, I might pass out before my time. I’ve stopped sweating, and—I wear a seventeen-inch collar.’ He made himself some scalding hot tea, which is a great remedy against heat stroke if you drink three or four cups of it in time. Then he watched the person sleeping.

‘A blind face that cries and can’t wipe its eyes, a blind face that chases him down corridors! H’m! Decidedly, Hummil ought to go on leave as soon as possible; and, sane or otherwise, he undoubtedly did rowel himself most cruelly. Well, Heaven send us understanding!’

‘A blind face that cries and can't wipe its eyes, a blind face that follows him down the hallways! Hmm! Clearly, Hummil should take leave as soon as he can; and whether sane or not, he definitely did torment himself quite a bit. Well, may Heaven grant us understanding!’

At mid-day Hummil rose, with an evil taste in his mouth, but an unclouded eye and a joyful heart.

At noon, Hummil got up, with a bad taste in his mouth, but a clear eye and a happy heart.

‘I was pretty bad last night, wasn’t I?’ said he.

‘I was pretty awful last night, wasn’t I?’ he said.

‘I have seen healthier men. You must have had a touch of the sun. Look here: if I write you a swingeing medical certificate, will you apply for leave on the spot?’

‘I’ve seen healthier guys. You must have gotten a bit sunstroke. Listen: if I write you a strong medical certificate, will you take leave right away?’

‘No.’

‘No.’

‘Why not? You want it.’

"Why not? You want it."

‘Yes, but I can hold on till the weather’s a little cooler.’

‘Yes, but I can wait until the weather is a bit cooler.’

‘Why should you, if you can get relieved on the spot?’

‘Why should you, if you can get help right away?’

‘Burkett is the only man who could be sent; and he’s a born fool.’

‘Burkett is the only guy who could be sent; and he’s a total idiot.’

‘Oh, never mind about the line. You aren’t so important as all that. Wire for leave, if necessary.’

‘Oh, don’t worry about the line. You’re not that important. Just send a request for leave if you need to.’

Hummil looked very uncomfortable.

Hummil looked really uncomfortable.

‘I can hold on till the Rains,’ he said evasively.

"I can wait until the Rains," he said vaguely.

‘You can’t. Wire to headquarters for Burkett.’

‘You can’t. Send a message to headquarters for Burkett.’

‘I won’t. If you want to know why, particularly, Burkett is married, and his wife’s just had a kid, and she’s up at Simla, in the cool, and Burkett has a very nice billet that takes him into Simla from Saturday to Monday. That little woman isn’t at all well. If Burkett was transferred she’d try to follow him. If she left the baby behind she’d fret herself to death. If she came,—and Burkett’s one of those selfish little beasts who are always talking about a wife’s place being with her husband,—she’d die. It’s murder to bring a woman here just now. Burkett hasn’t the physique of a rat. If he came here he’d go out; and I know she hasn’t any money, and I’m pretty sure she’d go out too. I’m salted in a sort of way, and I’m not married. Wait till the Rains, and then Burkett can get thin down here. It’ll do him heaps of good.’

‘I won’t. If you want to know why, especially, Burkett is married, it’s because his wife just had a baby, and she’s up in Simla, where it’s cool, and Burkett has a nice posting that lets him go to Simla from Saturday to Monday. That poor woman isn’t doing well at all. If Burkett got transferred, she’d try to follow him. If she left the baby behind, she’d worry herself to death. If she came here—and Burkett’s one of those selfish guys who always say a wife should be with her husband—she’d be in a really bad situation. It’s dangerous to bring a woman here right now. Burkett doesn’t have the build of a fighter. If he came here, he’d end up getting sick; and I know she doesn’t have any money, and I’m pretty sure she’d get sick too. I’ve adjusted to this place in some way, and I’m not married. Just wait until the Rains, and then Burkett can lose some weight down here. It’ll do him a lot of good.’

‘Do you mean to say that you intend to face—what you have faced, till the Rains break?’

‘Are you saying that you plan to deal with—what you've dealt with, until the rains come?’

‘Oh, it won’t be so bad, now you’ve shown me a way out of it. I can always wire to you. Besides, now I’ve once got into the way of sleeping, it’ll be all right. Anyhow, I shan’t put in for leave. That’s the long and the short of it.’

‘Oh, it won’t be so bad now that you’ve shown me a way out of this. I can always message you. Besides, now that I’ve gotten used to sleeping, it’ll be fine. Anyway, I won’t request any time off. That’s the bottom line.’

‘My great Scott! I thought all that sort of thing was dead and done with.’

‘My goodness! I thought all that kind of stuff was over and done with.’

‘Bosh! You’d do the same yourself. I feel a new man, thanks to that cigarette-case. You’re going over to camp now, aren’t you?’

‘Come on! You’d do the same yourself. I feel like a new person, thanks to that cigarette case. You’re heading over to the camp now, right?’

‘Yes; but I’ll try to look you up every other day, if I can.’

‘Sure; but I’ll try to check in with you every other day, if I can.’

‘I’m not bad enough for that. I don’t want you to bother. Give the coolies gin and ketchup.’

‘I’m not bad enough for that. I don’t want you to bother. Give the workers gin and ketchup.’

‘Then you feel all right?’

'So you feel okay?'

‘Fit to fight for my life, but not to stand out in the sun talking to you. Go along, old man, and bless you!’

‘Ready to fight for my life, but not to stand out in the sun chatting with you. Go on, old man, and take care!’

Hummil turned on his heel to face the echoing desolation of his bungalow, and the first thing he saw standing in the verandah was the figure of himself. He had met a similar apparition once before, when he was suffering from overwork and the strain of the hot weather.

Hummil turned around to face the empty desolation of his bungalow, and the first thing he saw standing on the porch was himself. He had encountered a similar vision before, when he was overwhelmed with work and the stress of the heat.

‘This is bad,—already,’ he said, rubbing his eyes. ‘If the thing slides away from me all in one piece, like a ghost, I shall know it is only my eyes and stomach that are out of order. If it walks—my head is going.’

‘This is bad already,’ he said, rubbing his eyes. ‘If it slips away from me all in one piece, like a ghost, I’ll know it’s just my eyes and stomach that are messed up. If it actually walks, then my head is going.’

He approached the figure, which naturally kept at an unvarying distance from him, as is the use of all spectres that are born of overwork. It slid through the house and dissolved into swimming specks within the eyeball as soon as it reached the burning light of the garden. Hummil went about his business till even. When he came in to dinner he found himself sitting at the table. The vision rose and walked out hastily. Except that it cast no shadow it was in all respects real.

He walked up to the figure, which stayed a constant distance away from him, just like all ghosts created from exhaustion. It glided through the house and vanished into tiny specks in his vision as soon as it hit the bright light of the garden. Hummil went about his work until evening. When he came in for dinner, he found himself sitting at the table. The vision got up and hurried out. Aside from not casting a shadow, it seemed completely real.

No living man knows what that week held for Hummil. An increase of the epidemic kept Spurstow in camp among the coolies, and all he could do was to telegraph to Mottram, bidding him go to the bungalow and sleep there. But Mottram was forty miles away from the nearest telegraph, and knew nothing of anything save the needs of the survey till he met, early on Sunday morning, Lowndes and Spurstow heading towards Hummil’s for the weekly gathering.

No one knows what that week was like for Hummil. The rise in the epidemic kept Spurstow in camp with the workers, and all he could do was send a message to Mottram, telling him to go to the bungalow and spend the night there. But Mottram was forty miles away from the nearest telegraph and had no idea what was happening except for the needs of the survey until he ran into Lowndes and Spurstow heading toward Hummil’s for their weekly meeting early on Sunday morning.

‘Hope the poor chap’s in a better temper,’ said the former, swinging himself off his horse at the door. ‘I suppose he isn’t up yet.’

‘Hope the poor guy's in a better mood,’ said the former, hopping off his horse at the door. ‘I guess he isn’t up yet.’

‘I’ll just have a look at him,’ said the doctor. ‘If he’s asleep there’s no need to wake him.’

‘I’ll just take a look at him,’ said the doctor. ‘If he’s asleep, there’s no need to wake him.’

And an instant later, by the tone of Spurstow’s voice calling upon them to enter, the men knew what had happened. There was no need to wake him.

And a moment later, by the tone of Spurstow’s voice inviting them to come in, the men understood what had happened. There was no need to wake him.

The punkah was still being pulled over the bed, but Hummil had departed this life at least three hours.

The punkah was still being pulled over the bed, but Hummil had left this world at least three hours ago.

The body lay on its back, hands clinched by the side, as Spurstow had seen it lying seven nights previously. In the staring eyes was written terror beyond the expression of any pen.

The body lay on its back, hands clenched at the sides, just as Spurstow had seen it lying seven nights earlier. The wide-open eyes were filled with a terror that words could never capture.

Mottram, who had entered behind Lowndes, bent over the dead and touched the forehead lightly with his lips. ‘Oh, you lucky, lucky devil!’ he whispered.

Mottram, who had come in after Lowndes, leaned over the dead body and lightly touched its forehead with his lips. "Oh, you lucky, lucky devil!" he whispered.

But Lowndes had seen the eyes, and withdrew shuddering to the other side of the room.

But Lowndes had seen the eyes and trembled as he moved to the other side of the room.

‘Poor chap! poor old chap! And the last time I met him I was angry. Spurstow, we should have watched him. Has he—?’

‘Poor guy! poor old guy! And the last time I saw him, I was upset. Spurstow, we should have kept an eye on him. Has he—?’

Deftly Spurstow continued his investigations, ending by a search round the room.

Deftly, Spurstow continued his investigations, finishing with a search around the room.

‘No, he hasn’t,’ he snapped. ‘There’s no trace of anything. Call the servants.’

‘No, he hasn’t,’ he replied sharply. ‘There’s no sign of anything. Call the servants.’

They came, eight or ten of them, whispering and peering over each other’s shoulders.

They arrived, about eight or ten of them, whispering and leaning over each other’s shoulders.

‘When did your Sahib go to bed?’ said Spurstow.

‘When did your master go to bed?’ said Spurstow.

‘At eleven or ten, we think,’ said Hummil’s personal servant.

‘At eleven or ten, we think,’ said Hummil’s personal servant.

‘He was well then? But how should you know?’

‘He was okay then? But how would you know?’

‘He was not ill, as far as our comprehension extended. But he had slept very little for three nights. This I know, because I saw him walking much, and specially in the heart of the night.’

‘He wasn’t sick, as far as we understood. But he had hardly slept for three nights. I know this because I saw him walking around a lot, especially in the middle of the night.’

As Spurstow was arranging the sheet, a big straight-necked hunting-spur tumbled on the ground. The doctor groaned. The personal servant peeped at the body.

As Spurstow was laying out the sheet, a large straight-necked hunting spur fell to the ground. The doctor let out a groan. The personal servant glanced at the body.

‘What do you think, Chuma?’ said Spurstow, catching the look on the dark face.

‘What do you think, Chuma?’ Spurstow asked, noticing the expression on the dark face.

‘Heaven-born, in my poor opinion, this that was my master has descended into the Dark Places, and there has been caught because he was not able to escape with sufficient speed. We have the spur for evidence that he fought with Fear. Thus have I seen men of my race do with thorns when a spell was laid upon them to overtake them in their sleeping hours and they dared not sleep.’

‘In my humble opinion, this master of mine, who was truly exceptional, has fallen into darkness and couldn’t escape fast enough. We have proof that he faced his fears. I have witnessed my own people struggle against thorns when a curse compelled them to sleep, and they were too afraid to close their eyes.’

‘Chuma, you’re a mud-head. Go out and prepare seals to be set on the Sahib’s property.’

‘Chuma, you’re being foolish. Go out and prepare the seals to be placed on the Sahib’s property.’

‘God has made the Heaven-born. God has made me. Who are we, to inquire into the dispensations of God? I will bid the other servants hold aloof while you are reckoning the tale of the Sahib’s property. They are all thieves, and would steal.’

‘God has created those destined for greatness. God has created me. Who are we to question the ways of God? I will tell the other servants to stay back while you count the Sahib’s possessions. They are all thieves and would steal.’

‘As far as I can make out, he died from—oh, anything; stoppage of the heart’s action, heat-apoplexy, or some other visitation,’ said Spurstow to his companions. ‘We must make an inventory of his effects, and so on.’

‘From what I can tell, he died from—oh, anything; heart failure, heatstroke, or some other issue,’ said Spurstow to his friends. ‘We need to take stock of his belongings, and so on.’

‘He was scared to death,’ insisted Lowndes. ‘Look at those eyes! For pity’s sake don’t let him be buried with them open!’

‘He was terrified,’ insisted Lowndes. ‘Look at those eyes! For goodness’ sake, don’t let him be buried with them open!’

‘Whatever it was, he’s clear of all the trouble now,’ said Mottram softly.

“Whatever it was, he’s out of all the trouble now,” said Mottram softly.

Spurstow was peering into the open eyes.

Spurstow was looking into the open eyes.

‘Come here,’ said he. ‘Can you see anything there?’

‘Come here,’ he said. ‘Can you see anything over there?’

‘I can’t face it!’ whimpered Lowndes. ‘Cover up the face! Is there any fear on earth that can turn a man into that likeness? It’s ghastly. Oh, Spurstow, cover it up!’

‘I can’t handle it!’ Lowndes complained. ‘Cover the face! Is there any fear on earth that could turn a man into something like that? It’s terrifying. Oh, Spurstow, cover it up!’

‘No fear—on earth,’ said Spurstow. Mottram leaned over his shoulder and looked intently.

‘No fear—on earth,’ Spurstow said. Mottram leaned over his shoulder and looked closely.

‘I see nothing except some gray blurs in the pupil. There can be nothing there, you know.’

‘I see nothing except some gray smudges in the pupil. There can't be anything there, you know.’

‘Even so. Well, let’s think. It’ll take half a day to knock up any sort of coffin; and he must have died at midnight. Lowndes, old man, go out and tell the coolies to break ground next to Jevins’s grave. Mottram, go round the house with Chuma and see that the seals are put on things. Send a couple of men to me here, and I’ll arrange.’

‘Even so. Well, let’s think. It’ll take half a day to put together some kind of coffin; and he must have died at midnight. Lowndes, old man, go out and tell the laborers to start digging next to Jevins’s grave. Mottram, go around the house with Chuma and make sure everything is sealed properly. Send a couple of men to me here, and I’ll take care of it.’

The strong-armed servants when they returned to their own kind told a strange story of the doctor Sahib vainly trying to call their master back to life by magic arts,—to wit, the holding of a little green box that clicked to each of the dead man’s eyes, and of a bewildered muttering on the part of the doctor Sahib, who took the little green box away with him.

The strong servants, when they got back to their own people, shared a strange tale about the doctor Sahib desperately trying to bring their master back to life using some kind of magic. They mentioned how he held a small green box that clicked against the dead man’s eyes, along with the doctor Sahib muttering in confusion as he took the little green box with him.

The resonant hammering of a coffin-lid is no pleasant thing to hear, but those who have experience maintain that much more terrible is the soft swish of the bed-linen, the reeving and unreeving of the bed-tapes, when he who has fallen by the roadside is apparelled for burial, sinking gradually as the tapes are tied over, till the swaddled shape touches the floor and there is no protest against the indignity of hasty disposal.

The loud banging of a coffin lid isn't a nice sound, but those with experience say that even worse is the gentle rustle of the bed sheets, the tightening and loosening of the bed tapes, when someone who has died by the roadside is dressed for burial, slowly sinking as the tapes are tied over them, until the wrapped body hits the floor with no objection to the shame of a quick burial.

At the last moment Lowndes was seized with scruples of conscience. ‘Ought you to read the service,—from beginning to end?’ said he to Spurstow.

At the last moment, Lowndes was hit with doubts about his conscience. “Should you really read the service—from start to finish?” he asked Spurstow.

‘I intend to. You’re my senior as a civilian. You can take it if you like.’

‘I plan to. You're my senior as a civilian. You can accept it if you want.’

‘I didn’t mean that for a moment. I only thought if we could get a chaplain from somewhere,—I’m willing to ride anywhere,—and give poor Hummil a better chance. That’s all.’

‘I didn’t mean that at all. I just thought if we could find a chaplain somewhere—I’m ready to ride anywhere—and give poor Hummil a better chance. That’s all.’

‘Bosh!’ said Spurstow, as he framed his lips to the tremendous words that stand at the head of the burial service.

‘Nonsense!’ said Spurstow, as he shaped his lips to the powerful words that begin the burial service.

After breakfast they smoked a pipe in silence to the memory of the dead. Then Spurstow said absently—

After breakfast, they quietly smoked a pipe in memory of the dead. Then Spurstow said absentmindedly—

‘’Tisn’t in medical science.’

"Isn't in medical science."

‘What?’

‘What?’

‘Things in a dead man’s eye.’

‘Things in a dead man’s eye.’

‘For goodness’ sake leave that horror alone!’ said Lowndes. ‘I’ve seen a native die of pure fright when a tiger chivied him. I know what killed Hummil.’

‘For goodness’ sake, leave that horror alone!’ said Lowndes. ‘I’ve seen a native die of pure fright when a tiger chased him. I know what killed Hummil.’

‘The deuce you do! I’m going to try to see.’ And the doctor retreated into the bath-room with a Kodak camera. After a few minutes there was the sound of something being hammered to pieces, and he emerged, very white indeed.

‘No way! I’m going to try to see.’ And the doctor went into the bathroom with a Kodak camera. After a few minutes, there was the sound of something being smashed to bits, and he came out looking very pale.

‘Have you got a picture?’ said Mottram. ‘What does the thing look like?’

‘Do you have a picture?’ Mottram asked. ‘What does it look like?’

‘It was impossible, of course. You needn’t look, Mottram. I’ve torn up the films. There was nothing there. It was impossible.’

‘It was impossible, of course. You don’t need to look, Mottram. I’ve destroyed the films. There was nothing on them. It was impossible.’

‘That,’ said Lowndes, very distinctly, watching the shaking hand striving to relight the pipe, ‘is a damned lie.’

‘That,’ Lowndes said clearly, watching the trembling hand trying to relight the pipe, ‘is a damn lie.’

Mottram laughed uneasily. ‘Spurstow’s right,’ he said. ‘We’re all in such a state now that we’d believe anything. For pity’s sake let’s try to be rational.’

Mottram laughed nervously. "Spurstow's right," he said. "We're all in such a state now that we'd believe anything. For goodness' sake, let's try to be reasonable."

There was no further speech for a long time. The hot wind whistled without, and the dry trees sobbed. Presently the daily train, winking brass, burnished steel, and spouting steam, pulled up panting in the intense glare. ‘We’d better go on on that,’ said Spurstow. ‘Go back to work. I’ve written my certificate. We can’t do any more good here, and work’ll keep our wits together. Come on.’

There was silence for a long time. The hot wind whistled outside, and the dry trees creaked. Soon, the daily train, shining brass, polished steel, and blowing steam, arrived, huffing in the harsh light. “We should get on that,” Spurstow said. “Let’s get back to work. I’ve finished my certificate. We can’t help any more here, and staying busy will keep us sharp. Let’s go.”

No one moved. It is not pleasant to face railway journeys at mid-day in June. Spurstow gathered up his hat and whip, and, turning in the doorway, said—

No one moved. It’s not pleasant to deal with train journeys in the middle of June. Spurstow picked up his hat and whip, and, turning in the doorway, said—

‘There may be Heaven,—there must be Hell. Meantime, there is our life here. We-ell?’

‘There might be Heaven, but there has to be Hell. In the meantime, there’s our life here. Well?’

Neither Mottram nor Lowndes had any answer to the question.

Neither Mottram nor Lowndes had an answer to the question.





THE MUTINY OF THE MAVERICKS

  Sec. 7.  { Cause       }              { in forces }   Regular forces,
  (I)      { Consipiring }              { belonging }   Reserve forces,
           { with other  }   a mutiny   { to Her    }   Auxiliary forces.
           { persons to  }   sedition   { Majesty’s }   Navy.
           { cause       }
Sec. 7.  { Cause       }              { in forces }   Regular forces,  
  (I)      { Conspiring }              { belonging }   Reserve forces,  
           { with other  }   a mutiny   { to Her    }   Auxiliary forces.  
           { persons to  }   sedition   { Majesty’s }   Navy.  
           { cause       }  

When three obscure gentlemen in San Francisco argued on insufficient premises they condemned a fellow-creature to a most unpleasant death in a far country, which had nothing whatever to do with the United States. They foregathered at the top of a tenement-house in Tehama Street, an unsavoury quarter of the city, and, there calling for certain drinks, they conspired because they were conspirators by trade, officially known as the Third Three of the I.A.A.—an institution for the propagation of pure light, not to be confounded with any others, though it is affiliated to many. The Second Three live in Montreal, and work among the poor there; the First Three have their home in New York, not far from Castle Garden, and write regularly once a week to a small house near one of the big hotels at Boulogne. What happens after that, a particular section of Scotland Yard knows too well, and laughs at. A conspirator detests ridicule. More men have been stabbed with Lucrezia Borgia daggers and dropped into the Thames for laughing at Head Centres and Triangles than for betraying secrets; for this is human nature.

When three unknown men in San Francisco argued based on flimsy ideas, they doomed a fellow human to a terrible death in a distant country that had nothing to do with the United States. They gathered at the top of a rundown apartment building on Tehama Street, a sketchy part of the city, and while ordering drinks, they plotted together because they were professional conspirators, officially known as the Third Three of the I.A.A.—an organization devoted to spreading pure knowledge, not to be confused with others, even though it is linked to many. The Second Three operate in Montreal, helping the poor there; the First Three are based in New York, not far from Castle Garden, and they send a weekly letter to a small address near one of the big hotels in Boulogne. What unfolds after that is well known to a specific division of Scotland Yard, which finds it amusing. A conspirator hates being mocked. More people have been stabbed with Lucrezia Borgia-style daggers and tossed into the Thames for making fun of Head Centres and Triangles than for revealing secrets; that's just human nature.

The Third Three conspired over whisky cocktails and a clean sheet of notepaper against the British Empire and all that lay therein. This work is very like what men without discernment call politics before a general election. You pick out and discuss, in the company of congenial friends, all the weak points in your opponents’ organisation, and unconsciously dwell upon and exaggerate all their mishaps, till it seems to you a miracle that the hated party holds together for an hour.

The Third Three plotted over whiskey cocktails and a blank sheet of notepaper against the British Empire and everything within it. This effort resembles what people lacking judgment refer to as politics before a general election. You highlight and talk about, with like-minded friends, all the flaws in your opponents' organization, unknowingly fixating on and exaggerating all their failures, until it seems like a miracle that the despised party stays united for even an hour.

‘Our principle is not so much active demonstration—that we leave to others—as passive embarrassment, to weaken and unnerve,’ said the first man. ‘Wherever an organisation is crippled, wherever a confusion is thrown into any branch of any department, we gain a step for those who take on the work; we are but the forerunners.’ He was a German enthusiast, and editor of a newspaper, from whose leading articles he quoted frequently.

‘Our approach is less about active demonstration—that's for others—and more about passive embarrassment, to destabilize and demoralize,’ said the first man. ‘Wherever an organization is weakened, wherever there’s chaos in any part of any department, we make it easier for those who take on the work; we are just the ones who pave the way.’ He was a German enthusiast and the editor of a newspaper, often quoting from his own leading articles.

‘That cursed Empire makes so many blunders of her own that unless we doubled the year’s average I guess it wouldn’t strike her anything special had occurred,’ said the second man. ‘Are you prepared to say that all our resources are equal to blowing off the muzzle of a hundred-ton gun or spiking a ten-thousand-ton ship on a plain rock in clear daylight? They can beat us at our own game. ‘Better join hands with the practical branches; we’re in funds now. Try a direct scare in a crowded street. They value their greasy hides.’ He was the drag upon the wheel, and an Americanised Irishman of the second generation, despising his own race and hating the other. He had learned caution.

‘That messed-up Empire keeps making so many mistakes that unless we doubled the year’s average, I doubt it would even notice anything unusual happened,’ said the second man. ‘Are you really saying all our resources are enough to blow off the muzzle of a hundred-ton gun or to spike a ten-thousand-ton ship on a plain rock in broad daylight? They can beat us at our own game. ‘We’d be better off teaming up with the practical branches; we have the funds now. Let’s try to create a scare in a busy street. They really care about their skin.’ He was the drag on the progress, an Americanized Irishman of the second generation, looking down on his own race and resenting the other. He had learned to be cautious.

The third man drank his cocktail and spoke no word. He was the strategist, but unfortunately his knowledge of life was limited. He picked a letter from his breast-pocket and threw it across the table. That epistle to the heathen contained some very concise directions from the First Three in New York. It said—

The third man sipped his cocktail and didn't say a word. He was the strategist, but sadly, his understanding of life was narrow. He took a letter from his pocket and tossed it across the table. That letter to the uninitiated had some very straightforward instructions from the First Three in New York. It said—

‘The boom in black iron has already affected the eastern markets, where our agents have been forcing down the English-held stock among the smaller buyers who watch the turn of shares. Any immediate operations, such as western bears, would increase their willingness to unload. This, however, cannot be expected till they see clearly that foreign iron-masters are witting to co-operate. Mulcahy should be dispatched to feel the pulse of the market, and act accordingly. Mavericks are at present the best for our purpose.—P.D.Q.’

‘The surge in black iron has already impacted the eastern markets, where our agents have been pushing down the English-owned stock among the smaller buyers who are keeping an eye on the stock movements. Any immediate actions, like those from western sellers, would make them more likely to sell off. However, this can't be expected until they clearly see that foreign iron producers are willing to cooperate. Mulcahy should be sent to gauge the market conditions and act accordingly. Right now, mavericks are the best option for our needs.—P.D.Q.’

As a message referring to an iron crisis in Pennsylvania, it was interesting, if not lucid. As a new departure in organised attack on an outlying English dependency, it was more than interesting.

As a message about an iron crisis in Pennsylvania, it was intriguing, if not clear. As a new approach in a coordinated assault on a distant English territory, it was more than intriguing.

The second man read it through and murmured—

The second man read it and said quietly—

‘Already? Surely they are in too great a hurry. All that Dhulip Singh could do in India he has done, down to the distribution of his photographs among the peasantry. Ho! Ho! The Paris firm arranged that, and he has no substantial money backing from the Other Power. Even our agents in India know he hasn’t. What is the use of our organisation wasting men on work that is already done? Of course the Irish regiments in India are half mutinous as they stand.’

‘Already? They must be rushing too much. Dhulip Singh has done everything he could in India, even sharing his photographs with the peasants. Ha! The Paris firm set that up, and he doesn’t have strong financial support from the Other Power. Even our agents in India are aware of that. What’s the point of our organization wasting resources on work that’s already completed? Of course, the Irish regiments in India are practically mutinous as it is.’

This shows how near a lie may come to the truth. An Irish regiment, for just so long as it stands still, is generally a hard handful to control, being reckless and rough. When, however, it is moved in the direction of musketry-firing, it becomes strangely and unpatriotically content with its lot. It has even been heard to cheer the Queen with enthusiasm on these occasions.

This illustrates how close a lie can be to the truth. An Irish regiment, as long as it stays put, is usually a handful to manage, being wild and unruly. However, when it’s moved toward gunfire, it surprisingly becomes unpatriotically accepting of its situation. It has even been known to cheer for the Queen enthusiastically during these times.

But the notion of tampering with the army was, from the point of view of Tehama Street, an altogether sound one. There is no shadow of stability in the policy of an English Government, and the most sacred oaths of England would, even if engrossed on vellum, find very few buyers among colonies and dependencies that have suffered from vain beliefs. But there remains to England always her army. That cannot change except in the matter of uniform and equipment. The officers may write to the papers demanding the heads of the Horse Guards in default of cleaner redress for grievances; the men may break loose across a country town and seriously startle the publicans; but neither officers nor men have it in their composition to mutiny after the continental manner. The English people, when they trouble to think about the army at all, are, and with justice, absolutely assured that it is absolutely trustworthy. Imagine for a moment their emotions on realising that such and such a regiment was in open revolt from causes directly due to England’s management of Ireland. They would probably send the regiment to the polls forthwith and examine their own consciences as to their duty to Erin; but they would never be easy any more. And it was this vague, unhappy mistrust that the I. A. A. were labouring to produce.

But the idea of messing with the army seemed, from the perspective of Tehama Street, a totally reasonable one. There's no real stability in the policy of an English Government, and even the most solemn oaths of England, if written on parchment, would find very few takers among colonies and territories that have suffered from empty promises. But England always has her army. That can only change in terms of uniform and equipment. Officers might write to the newspapers demanding accountability from the Horse Guards because they can’t get proper resolutions for their complaints; the soldiers might cause a ruckus in a town and seriously shock the local pub owners; but neither the officers nor the soldiers have any tendency to mutiny like they do on the continent. The English people, when they do think about the army at all, are justifiably convinced that it is entirely reliable. Just imagine their reactions realizing that a certain regiment was in open rebellion due to England's handling of Ireland. They would likely send the regiment to the polls immediately and reflect on their responsibilities to Ireland; but they would never feel secure again. And it was this vague, unsettling mistrust that the I. A. A. were working to create.

‘Sheer waste of breath,’ said the second man after a pause in the council, ‘I don’t see the use of tampering with their fool-army, but it has been tried before and we must try it again. It looks well in the reports. If we send one man from here you may bet your life that other men are going too. Order up Mulcahy.’

‘What a waste of time,’ said the second man after a pause in the meeting, ‘I don’t see the point in messing with their ridiculous army, but it’s been done before and we have to do it again. It looks good in the reports. If we send one person from here, you can bet that others will go too. Bring in Mulcahy.’

They ordered him up—a slim, slight, dark-haired young man, devoured with that blind rancorous hatred of England that only reaches its full growth across the Atlantic. He had sucked it from his mother’s breast in the little cabin at the back of the northern avenues of New York; he had been taught his rights and his wrongs, in German and Irish, on the canal fronts of Chicago; and San Francisco held men who told him strange and awful things of the great blind power over the seas. Once, when business took him across the Atlantic, he had served in an English regiment, and being insubordinate had suffered extremely. He drew all his ideas of England that were not bred by the cheaper patriotic prints from one iron-fisted colonel and an unbending adjutant. He would go to the mines if need be to teach his gospel. And he went as his instructions advised p.d.q.—which means ‘with speed’—to introduce embarrassment into an Irish regiment, ‘already half-mutinous, quartered among Sikh peasantry, all wearing miniatures of His Highness Dhulip Singh, Maharaja of the Punjab, next their hearts, and all eagerly expecting his arrival.’ Other information equally valuable was given him by his masters. He was to be cautious, but never to grudge expense in winning the hearts of the men in the regiment. His mother in New York would supply funds, and he was to write to her once a month. Life is pleasant for a man who has a mother in New York to send him two hundred pounds a year over and above his regimental pay.

They called him over—a slim, slight, dark-haired young man, consumed by a deep-seated hatred for England that only fully develops across the Atlantic. He had absorbed it from his mother’s milk in a small cabin in the northern avenues of New York; he learned about right and wrong, in German and Irish, on the canals of Chicago; and in San Francisco, he heard strange and terrifying tales about the vast, blind power ruling the seas. Once, when he traveled across the Atlantic for work, he had served in an English regiment and faced severe consequences for being insubordinate. His understanding of England, apart from what he gathered from cheap patriotic publications, came from one iron-willed colonel and a strict adjutant. He was willing to go to the mines if necessary to spread his beliefs. And he went, just as instructed, p.d.q.—which means ‘with speed’—to create trouble in an Irish regiment that was ‘already half-mutinous, stationed among Sikh peasants, all wearing miniatures of His Highness Dhulip Singh, Maharaja of the Punjab, close to their hearts, eagerly awaiting his arrival.’ His superiors provided him with other equally important information. He was to be careful but never hesitate to spend money to win the men in the regiment over. His mother in New York would send him funds, and he was to write to her once a month. Life is good for a man with a mother in New York who sends him two hundred pounds a year on top of his regimental pay.

In process of time, thanks to his intimate knowledge of drill and musketry exercise, the excellent Mulcahy, wearing the corporal’s stripe, went out in a troopship and joined Her Majesty’s Royal Loyal Musketeers, commonly known as the ‘Mavericks,’ because they were masterless and unbranded cattle-sons of small farmers in County Clare, shoeless vagabonds of Kerry, herders of Bally-vegan, much wanted ‘moonlighters’ from the bare rainy headlands of the south coast, officered by O’Mores, Bradys, Hills, Kilreas, and the like. Never to outward seeming was there more promising material to work on. The First Three had chosen their regiment well. It feared nothing that moved or talked save the colonel and the regimental Roman Catholic chaplain, the fat Father Dennis, who held the keys of heaven and hell, and blared like an angry bull when he desired to be convincing. Him also it loved because on occasions of stress he was used to tuck up his cassock and charge with the rest into the merriest of the fray, where he always found, good man, that the saints sent him a revolver when there was a fallen private to be protected, or—but this came as an afterthought—his own gray head to be guarded.

Over time, thanks to his deep knowledge of drills and musket practice, the excellent Mulcahy, sporting the corporal’s stripe, set out on a troopship and joined Her Majesty’s Royal Loyal Musketeers, commonly known as the ‘Mavericks.’ They were seen as masterless and unbranded sons of small farmers from County Clare, shoeless wanderers from Kerry, herders from Bally-vegan, and wanted ‘moonlighters’ from the bare, rainy headlands of the south coast, led by O’Mores, Bradys, Hills, Kilreas, and others. At first glance, there seemed to be no better material to work with. The First Three had chosen their regiment wisely. It feared nothing that moved or spoke, except for the colonel and the regimental Roman Catholic chaplain, the hefty Father Dennis, who held the keys to heaven and hell, and bellowed like an angry bull when he wanted to be persuasive. They also loved him because, during moments of stress, he would roll up his cassock and charge into the heart of the action, where he always found, good man that he was, that the saints would provide him with a revolver when there was a fallen private to protect, or—though this was an afterthought—his own gray head to defend.

Cautiously as he had been instructed, tenderly and with much beer, Mulcahy opened his projects to such as he deemed fittest to listen. And these were, one and all, of that quaint, crooked, sweet, profoundly irresponsible and profoundly lovable race that fight like fiends, argue like children, reason like women, obey like men, and jest like their own goblins of the rath through rebellion, loyalty, want, woe, or war. The underground work of a conspiracy is always dull and very much the same the world over. At the end of six months—the seed always falling on good ground—Mulcahy spoke almost explicitly, hinting darkly in the approved fashion at dread powers behind him, and advising nothing more nor less than mutiny. Were they not dogs, evilly treated? had they not all their own and their national revenges to satisfy? Who in these days would do aught to nine hundred men in rebellion? Who, again, could stay them if they broke for the sea, licking up on their way other regiments only too anxious to join? And afterwards... here followed windy promises of gold and preferment, office, and honour, ever dear to a certain type of Irishman.

Cautiously, as he had been told, gently and with plenty of beer, Mulcahy shared his plans with those he thought would listen. These people were all part of that unique, quirky, affectionate group that fights fiercely, argues like kids, reasons like women, obeys like men, and jokes like their own mischievous spirits through rebellion, loyalty, need, sorrow, or war. The behind-the-scenes work of a conspiracy is usually boring and pretty much the same everywhere. After six months—where the seeds always land on fertile ground—Mulcahy spoke almost openly, alluding ominously to dark forces behind him, and encouraging nothing less than mutiny. Weren't they being treated badly? Did they not have their own personal and national vendettas to settle? Who today would dare take action against nine hundred men in rebellion? Who could stop them if they took off for the sea, picking up other eager regiments along the way? And then... he laid out grand promises of wealth and advancement, positions, and honor, which are always appealing to a particular kind of Irishman.

As he finished his speech, in the dusk of a twilight, to his chosen associates, there was a sound of a rapidly unslung belt behind him. The arm of one Dan Grady flew out in the gloom and arrested something. Then said Dan—-

As he finished his speech in the twilight, to his chosen associates, he heard the swift sound of a belt being unslung behind him. Dan Grady's arm shot out into the darkness and grabbed something. Then Dan said—-

‘Mulcahy, you’re a great man, an’ you do credit to whoever sent you. Walk about a bit while we think of it.’ Mulcahy departed elate. He knew his words would sink deep.

‘Mulcahy, you’re an amazing guy, and you make whoever sent you proud. Just walk around for a bit while we figure this out.’ Mulcahy left feeling happy. He knew his words would have a lasting impact.

‘Why the triple-dashed asterisks did ye not let me belt him?’ grunted a voice.

‘Why the triple-dashed asterisks didn’t you let me hit him?’ grunted a voice.

‘Because I’m not a fat-headed fool. Boys, ‘tis what he’s been driving at these six months—our superior corpril with his education and his copies of the Irish papers and his everlasting beer. He’s been sent for the purpose and that’s where the money comes from. Can ye not see? That man’s a gold-mine, which Horse Egan here would have destroyed with a belt-buckle. It would be throwing away the gifts of Providence not to fall in with his little plans. Of coorse we’ll mut’ny till all’s dry. Shoot the colonel on the parade-ground, massacree the company officers, ransack the arsenal, and then—Boys, did he tell you what next? He told me the other night when he was beginning to talk wild. Then we’re to join with the niggers, and look for help from Dhulip Singh and the Russians!’

‘Because I’m not an idiot. Guys, this is what he’s been getting at for six months—our so-called superior with his education, his Irish newspapers, and his constant beer. He’s been brought in for this purpose and that’s where the money comes from. Can’t you see? That man’s a gold mine, which Horse Egan here would have ruined with a belt buckle. It would be a shame to waste Providence's gifts by not going along with his little plans. Of course we'll mutiny until there's nothing left. Shoot the colonel on the parade ground, take out the company officers, raid the arsenal, and then—Guys, did he tell you what’s next? He told me the other night when he was starting to talk crazy. Then we’re supposed to team up with the Black people and look for help from Dhulip Singh and the Russians!’

‘And spoil the best campaign that ever was this side of Hell! Danny, I’d have lost the beer to ha’ given him the belting he requires.’

‘And ruin the best campaign ever on this side of Hell! Danny, I would have given up the beer to give him the beating he deserves.’

‘Oh, let him go this awhile, man! He’s got no—no constructiveness, but that’s the egg-meat of his plan, and you must understand that I’m in with it, an’ so are you. We’ll want oceans of beer to convince us—firmaments full. We’ll give him talk for his money, and one by one all the boys ‘ll come in and he’ll have a nest of nine hundred mutineers to squat in an’ give drink to.’

‘Oh, just let him go for now, man! He’s got no—no real ideas, but that’s the core of his plan, and you need to understand that I’m on board with it, and so are you. We’ll need tons of beer to convince us—loads of it. We’ll give him our opinions for what he’s paying, and one by one all the guys will join in and he’ll have a crew of nine hundred rebels to hang out with and drink.’

‘What makes me killing-mad is his wanting us to do what the niggers did thirty years gone. That an’ his pig’s cheek in saying that other regiments would come along,’ said a Kerry man.

‘What makes me furious is his wanting us to do what the Black folks did thirty years ago. That and his audacity in saying that other regiments would come along,’ said a Kerry man.

‘That’s not so bad as hintin’ we should loose off on the colonel.’

‘That’s not as bad as suggesting we should take action against the colonel.’

‘Colonel be sugared! I’d as soon as not put a shot through his helmet to see him jump and clutch his old horse’s head. But Mulcahy talks o’ shootin’ our comp’ny orf’cers accidental.’

‘Colonel be damned! I’d rather not take a shot through his helmet just to see him jump and grab his old horse’s head. But Mulcahy keeps talking about accidentally shooting our company officers.’

‘He said that, did he?’ said Horse Egan.

‘He really said that, did he?’ said Horse Egan.

‘Somethin’ like that, anyways. Can’t ye fancy ould Barber Brady wid a bullet in his lungs, coughin’ like a sick monkey, an’ sayin’, “Bhoys, I do not mind your gettin’ dhrunk, but you must hould your liquor like men. The man that shot me is dhrunk. I’ll suspend investigations for six hours, while I get this bullet cut out, an’ then—“’

‘Something like that, anyway. Can’t you picture old Barber Brady with a bullet in his lungs, coughing like a sick monkey, and saying, “Boys, I don’t mind you getting drunk, but you have to hold your liquor like men. The man who shot me is drunk. I’ll pause the investigation for six hours while I get this bullet taken out, and then—“’

‘An’ then,’ continued Horse Egan, for the peppery Major’s peculiarities of speech and manner were as well known as his tanned face; “‘an’ then, ye dissolute, half-baked, putty-faced scum o’ Connemara, if I find a man so much as lookin’ confused, begad, I’ll coort-martial the whole company. A man that can’t get over his liquor in six hours is not fit to belong to the Mavericks!”’

‘And then,’ continued Horse Egan, since the peppery Major’s quirks in speech and behavior were as well known as his sun-tanned face; ‘“and then, you dissolute, half-baked, putty-faced scum of Connemara, if I catch a man even looking confused, I swear I’ll court-martial the whole company. A man who can’t handle his liquor in six hours isn’t fit to be a part of the Mavericks!”’

A shout of laughter bore witness to the truth of the sketch.

A burst of laughter confirmed the accuracy of the sketch.

‘It’s pretty to think of,’ said the Kerry man slowly. ‘Mulcahy would have us do all the devilmint, and get clear himself, someways. He wudn’t be takin’ all this fool’s throuble in shpoilin’ the reputation of the regiment—’

‘It’s nice to think about,’ said the Kerry man slowly. ‘Mulcahy would have us do all the dirty work and get away clean, somehow. He wouldn't be putting up with all this nonsense ruining the regiment's reputation—’

‘Reputation of your grandmother’s pig!’ said Dan.

‘Reputation of your grandma’s pig!’ said Dan.

‘Well, an’ HE had a good reputation tu; so it’s all right. Mulcahy must see his way to clear out behind him, or he’d not ha’ come so far, talkin’ powers of darkness.’

‘Well, and HE had a good reputation too; so it’s all good. Mulcahy must be figuring out how to clear things up behind him, or he wouldn’t have come this far, talking about the forces of darkness.’

‘Did you hear anything of a regimental court-martial among the Black Boneens, these days? Half a company of ‘em took one of the new draft an’ hanged him by his arms with a tent-rope from a third story verandah. They gave no reason for so doin’, but he was half dead. I’m thinking that the Boneens are short-sighted. It was a friend of Mulcahy’s, or a man in the same trade. They’d a deal better ha’ taken his beer,’ returned Dan reflectively.

‘Did you hear about a regimental court-martial with the Black Boneens lately? Half a company of them captured one of the new recruits and hung him by his arms with a tent rope from a third-floor balcony. They didn’t give any reason for it, but he was nearly dead. I think the Boneens are being short-sighted. It was a friend of Mulcahy’s, or at least someone in the same line of work. They would’ve been better off taking his beer,’ Dan replied thoughtfully.

‘Better still ha’ handed him up to the Colonel,’ said Horse Egan, ‘onless—but sure the news wud be all over the counthry an’ give the reg’ment a bad name.’

‘Better yet, he should have handed him over to the Colonel,’ said Horse Egan, ‘unless—but the news would be all over the country and give the regiment a bad reputation.’

‘An’ there’d be no reward for that man—he but went about talkin’,’ said the Kerry man artlessly.

‘And there’d be no reward for that guy—he just went around talking,’ said the Kerry man honestly.

‘You speak by your breed,’ said Dan with a laugh. ‘There was never a Kerry man yet that wudn’t sell his brother for a pipe o’ tobacco an’ a pat on the back from a p’liceman.’

‘You talk like your kind,’ Dan said with a laugh. ‘There’s never been a Kerry man who wouldn't sell his brother for a pipe of tobacco and a pat on the back from a cop.’

‘Praise God I’m not a bloomin’ Orangeman,’ was the answer.

‘Thank God I’m not a damn Orangeman,’ was the answer.

‘No, nor never will be,’ said Dan. ‘They breed MEN in Ulster. Would you like to thry the taste of one?’

‘No, and I never will,’ said Dan. ‘They make MEN in Ulster. Want to try the taste of one?’

The Kerry man looked and longed, but forbore. The odds of battle were too great.

The Kerry man gazed and yearned, but held back. The chances of winning the battle were too overwhelming.

‘Then you’ll not even give Mulcahy a—a strike for his money,’ said the voice of Horse Egan, who regarded what he called ‘trouble’ of any kind as the pinnacle of felicity.

‘Then you won’t even give Mulcahy a—a run for his money,’ said the voice of Horse Egan, who saw what he called ‘trouble’ of any kind as the height of happiness.

Dan answered not at all, but crept on tip-toe, with large strides, to the mess-room, the men following. The room was empty. In a corner, cased like the King of Dahomey’s state umbrella, stood the regimental Colours. Dan lifted them tenderly and unrolled in the light of the candles the record of the Mavericks—tattered, worn, and hacked. The white satin was darkened everywhere with big brown stains, the gold threads on the crowned harp were frayed and discoloured, and the Red Bull, the totem of the Mavericks, was coffee-hued. The stiff, embroidered folds, whose price is human life, rustled down slowly. The Mavericks keep their colours long and guard them very sacredly.

Dan didn’t say a word but tiptoed with long strides to the mess room, followed by the men. The room was empty. In one corner, like the King of Dahomey's ceremonial umbrella, stood the regimental Colours. Dan gently lifted them and unrolled the record of the Mavericks in the candlelight—tattered, worn, and damaged. The white satin was stained all over with big brown marks, the gold threads on the crowned harp were frayed and discolored, and the Red Bull, the Mavericks' totem, was a coffee color. The stiff, embroidered folds, which represent human sacrifice, rustled down slowly. The Mavericks keep their Colours for a long time and guard them very carefully.

‘Vittoria, Salamanca, Toulouse, Waterloo, Moodkee, Ferozshah, an’ Sobraon—that was fought close next door here, against the very beggars he wants us to join. Inkermann, The Alma, Sebastopol! What are those little businesses compared to the campaigns of General Mulcahy? The Mut’ny, think o’ that; the Mut’ny an’ some dirty little matters in Afghanistan; an’ for that an’ these an’ those’—Dan pointed to the names of glorious battles—‘that Yankee man with the partin’ in his hair comes an’ says as easy as “have a drink.”... Holy Moses, there’s the captain!’

‘Vittoria, Salamanca, Toulouse, Waterloo, Moodkee, Ferozshah, and Sobraon—that was fought right next door, against the very beggars he wants us to team up with. Inkermann, The Alma, Sebastopol! What are those small fights compared to the campaigns of General Mulcahy? The Mutiny, just think about it; the Mutiny and some petty issues in Afghanistan; and for that and these and those’—Dan pointed to the names of glorious battles—‘that Yankee guy with the part in his hair comes and says as casually as “have a drink.”... Holy Moses, there’s the captain!’

But it was the mess-sergeant who came in just as the men clattered out, and found the colours uncased.

But it was the mess sergeant who walked in just as the men rushed out and discovered the colors uncovered.

From that day dated the mutiny of the Mavericks, to the joy of Mulcahy and the pride of his mother in New York—the good lady who sent the money for the beer. Never, so far as words went, was such a mutiny. The conspirators, led by Dan Grady and Horse Egan, poured in daily. They were sound men, men to be trusted, and they all wanted blood; but first they must have beer. They cursed the Queen, they mourned over Ireland, they suggested hideous plunder of the Indian country side, and then, alas—some of the younger men would go forth and wallow on the ground in spasms of wicked laughter.

From the day of the Mavericks' mutiny, to the joy of Mulcahy and the pride of his mother in New York—the good lady who sent the money for the beer. Never, as far as words go, was there such a mutiny. The conspirators, led by Dan Grady and Horse Egan, came in every day. They were solid men, trustworthy men, and they all wanted blood; but first, they needed beer. They cursed the Queen, mourned for Ireland, suggested awful plunder of the Indian countryside, and then, unfortunately—some of the younger guys would go out and roll on the ground in fits of wicked laughter.

The genius of the Irish for conspiracies is remarkable. None the less they would swear no oaths but those of their own making, which were rare and curious, and they were always at pains to impress Mulcahy with the risks they ran. Naturally the flood of beer wrought demoralisation. But Mulcahy confused the causes of things, and when a very muzzy Maverick smote a sergeant on the nose or called his commanding officer a bald-headed old lard-bladder and even worse names, he fancied that rebellion and not liquor was at the bottom of the outbreak. Other gentlemen who have concerned themselves in larger conspiracies have made the same error.

The Irish have a remarkable knack for conspiracies. However, they would only swear oaths of their own making, which were rare and strange, and they always made a point to stress to Mulcahy the risks they faced. Naturally, the constant flow of beer led to some demoralization. But Mulcahy mixed up the reasons behind things, and when a very drunk Maverick hit a sergeant on the nose or called his commanding officer a bald old fool and even worse names, he believed rebellion and not alcohol was the cause of the incident. Other people involved in bigger conspiracies have made the same mistake.

The hot season, in which they protested no man could rebel, came to an end, and Mulcahy suggested a visible return for his teachings. As to the actual upshot of the mutiny he cared nothing. It would be enough if the English, infatuatedly trusting to the integrity of their army, should be startled with news of an Irish regiment revolting from political considerations. His persistent demands would have ended, at Dan’s instigation, in a regimental belting which in all probability would have killed him and cut off the supply of beer, had not he been sent on special duty some fifty miles away from the cantonment to cool his heels in a mud fort and dismount obsolete artillery. Then the colonel of the Mavericks, reading his newspaper diligently, and scenting Frontier trouble from afar, posted to the army headquarters and pled with the Commander-in-chief for certain privileges, to be granted under certain contingencies; which contingencies came about only a week later, when the annual little war on the border developed itself and the colonel returned to carry the good news to the Mavericks. He held the promise of the Chief for active service, and the men must get ready.

The hot season, during which they claimed no one could rebel, came to an end, and Mulcahy suggested a visible return to his teachings. He didn’t care at all about the actual outcome of the mutiny. It would be enough if the English, blindly trusting their army's integrity, were shocked by news of an Irish regiment rebelling for political reasons. His constant demands would have led, at Dan’s suggestion, to a serious beating that would likely have killed him and cut off the beer supply, if he hadn’t been assigned special duty about fifty miles away from the camp to cool his heels in a mud fort and dismantle outdated artillery. Then the colonel of the Mavericks, diligently reading his newspaper and sensing trouble on the Frontier from a distance, rushed to army headquarters and begged the Commander-in-chief for certain privileges to be granted under specific conditions; those conditions came about only a week later when the annual minor conflict on the border flared up, and the colonel returned to bring the good news to the Mavericks. He had the Chief's promise for active service, and the men needed to get ready.

On the evening of the same day, Mulcahy, an unconsidered corporal—yet great in conspiracy—returned to cantonments, and heard sounds of strife and howlings from afar off. The mutiny had broken out and the barracks of the Mavericks were one white-washed pandemonium. A private tearing through the barrack-square, gasped in his ear, ‘Service! Active service. It’s a burnin’ shame.’ Oh joy, the Mavericks had risen on the eve of battle! They would not—noble and loyal sons of Ireland—serve the Queen longer. The news would flash through the country side and over to England, and he—Mulcahy—the trusted of the Third Three, had brought about the crash. The private stood in the middle of the square and cursed colonel, regiment, officers, and doctor, particularly the doctor, by his gods. An orderly of the native cavalry regiment clattered through the mob of soldiers. He was half lifted, half dragged from his horse, beaten on the back with mighty hand-claps till his eyes watered, and called all manner of endearing names. Yes, the Mavericks had fraternised with the native troops. Who then was the agent among the latter that had blindly wrought with Mulcahy so well?

On the evening of the same day, Mulcahy, a neglected corporal—yet significant in scheming—returned to the barracks and heard sounds of chaos and shouting in the distance. The mutiny had begun, and the Mavericks' barracks was a complete uproar. A private sprinting across the courtyard gasped in his ear, “Service! Active service. It’s a burning shame.” Oh joy, the Mavericks had risen just before battle! They would not—noble and loyal sons of Ireland—serve the Queen any longer. The news would spread through the countryside and over to England, and he—Mulcahy—the trusted one of the Third Three, had caused it all to happen. The private stood in the middle of the square, cursing the colonel, the regiment, the officers, and the doctor, especially the doctor, by all he held holy. An orderly from the native cavalry regiment rushed through the crowd of soldiers. He was half pulled, half dragged off his horse, thrashed on the back with heavy slaps until his eyes watered, while being called all sorts of affectionate names. Yes, the Mavericks had allied with the native troops. So who was the agent among them that had worked so seamlessly with Mulcahy?

An officer slunk, almost ran, from the mess to a barrack. He was mobbed by the infuriated soldiery, who closed round but did not kill him, for he fought his way to shelter, flying for the life. Mulcahy could have wept with pure joy and thankfulness. The very prisoners in the guard-room were shaking the bars of their cells and howling like wild beasts, and from every barrack poured the booming as of a big war-drum.

An officer hurried, almost sprinted, from the mess to the barrack. He was surrounded by the furious soldiers, who closed in but didn’t kill him, because he fought his way to safety, fleeing for his life. Mulcahy could have cried with pure joy and gratitude. Even the prisoners in the guardroom were shaking the bars of their cells and howling like wild animals, and from every barrack came the loud sound of a big war drum.

Mulcahy hastened to his own barrack. He could hardly hear himself speak. Eighty men were pounding with fist and heel the tables and trestles—eighty men, flushed with mutiny, stripped to their shirt sleeves, their knapsacks half-packed for the march to the sea, made the two-inch boards thunder again as they chanted to a tune that Mulcahy knew well, the Sacred War Song of the Mavericks—

Mulcahy rushed to his own barrack. He could barely hear himself talk. Eighty men were hitting the tables and trestles with their fists and heels—eighty men, heated with rebellion, rolled up their sleeves, their backpacks half-packed for the march to the sea, making the two-inch boards rumble again as they sang to a tune that Mulcahy recognized well, the Sacred War Song of the Mavericks—

     Listen in the north, my boys, there’s trouble on the wind;
     Tramp o’ Cossack hooves in front, gray great-coats behind,
     Trouble on the Frontier of a most amazin’ kind,
       Trouble on the waters o’ the Oxus!
     Listen up in the north, my boys, there’s trouble brewing;  
     The sound of Cossack hooves in front, gray great-coats behind,  
     Trouble on the Frontier of a truly astonishing kind,  
       Trouble on the waters of the Oxus!

Then, as a table broke under the furious accompaniment—

Then, as a table collapsed under the furious noise—

     Hurrah! hurrah! it’s north by west we go;
     Hurrah! hurrah! the chance we wanted so;
     Let ‘em hear the chorus from Umballa to MosCOW,
     As we go marchin’ to the Kremling.
     Hooray! Hooray! We're heading north by west;  
     Hooray! Hooray! We've got the chance we've wanted so;  
     Let them hear the chorus from Umballa to Moscow,  
     As we march our way to the Kremlin.  

‘Mother of all the saints in bliss and all the devils in cinders, where’s my fine new sock widout the heel?’ howled Horse Egan, ransacking everybody’s valise but his own. He was engaged in making up deficiencies of kit preparatory to a campaign, and in that work he steals best who steals last. ‘Ah, Mulcahy, you’re in good time,’ he shouted. ‘We’ve got the route, and we’re off on Thursday for a pic-nic wid the Lancers next door.’

“Mother of all the saints in heaven and all the devils in hell, where’s my nice new sock without the heel?” howled Horse Egan, rummaging through everyone’s luggage except his own. He was busy gathering supplies for a campaign, and it’s best to take what you need right at the end. “Ah, Mulcahy, you’re just in time,” he shouted. “We’ve got the route, and we’re leaving on Thursday for a picnic with the Lancers next door.”

An ambulance orderly appeared with a huge basket full of lint rolls, provided by the forethought of the Queen for such as might need them later on. Horse Egan unrolled his bandage, and flicked it under Mulcahy’s nose, chanting—

An ambulance orderly showed up with a big basket full of lint rolls, supplied by the Queen's foresight for anyone who might need them later. Horse Egan unrolled his bandage and waved it under Mulcahy’s nose, chanting—

    ‘Sheepskin an’ bees’ wax, thunder, pitch, and plaster,
     The more you try to pull it off, the more it sticks the faster.
     As I was goin’ to New Orleans—
    ‘Sheepskin and beeswax, thunder, pitch, and plaster,  
     The more you try to pull it off, the faster it sticks.  
     As I was heading to New Orleans—

‘You know the rest of it, my Irish American-Jew boy. By gad, ye have to fight for the Queen in the inside av a fortnight, my darlin’.’

‘You know the rest of it, my Irish American-Jewish boy. By gosh, you have to fight for the Queen in less than two weeks, my darling.’

A roar of laughter interrupted. Mulcahy looked vacantly down the room. Bid a boy defy his father when the pantomime-cab is at the door; or a girl develop a will of her own when her mother is putting the last touches to the first ball-dress; but do not ask an Irish regiment to embark upon mutiny on the eve of a campaign; when it has fraternised with the native regiment that accompanies it, and driven its officers into retirement with ten thousand clamorous questions, and the prisoners dance for joy, and the sick men stand in the open, calling down all known diseases on the head of the doctor, who has certified that they are “medically unfit for active service.” At even the Mavericks might have been mistaken for mutineers by one so unversed in their natures as Mulcahy. At dawn a girls’ school might have learned deportment from them. They knew that their colonel’s hand had closed, and that he who broke that iron discipline would not go to the front: nothing in the world will persuade one of our soldiers when he is ordered to the north on the smallest of affairs that he is not immediately going gloriously to slay Cossacks and cook his kettles in the palace of the Czar. A few of the younger men mourned for Mulcahy’s beer, because the campaign was to be conducted on strict temperance principles, but as Dan and Horse Egan said sternly, ‘We’ve got the beer-man with us. He shall drink now on his own hook.’

A loud burst of laughter interrupted. Mulcahy stared blankly down the room. You can expect a boy to challenge his father when the party bus is at the door; or a girl to assert her independence when her mom is finalizing the last touches on her first ball gown; but don’t expect an Irish regiment to start a mutiny right before a campaign; after they’ve bonded with the local regiment that’s joining them, and sent their officers packing with a flood of questions, and when the prisoners are celebrating, and the sick soldiers are outside yelling every known illness at the doctor, who declared them “medically unfit for active service.” Even the Mavericks could have been mistaken for rebels by someone as clueless about their personalities as Mulcahy. At dawn, a girls’ school could have learned manners from them. They understood that their colonel's authority was absolute, and anyone who broke that strict discipline wouldn't be heading to the front: nothing in the world will convince our soldiers when they’re ordered north for the smallest tasks that they aren’t on the way to gloriously slay Cossacks and cook their meals in the Czar’s palace. A few of the younger guys were sad about Mulcahy’s beer since the campaign was going to follow strict no-alcohol rules, but as Dan and Horse Egan firmly stated, “We’ve got the beer guy with us. He can drink now if he wants.”

Mulcahy had not taken into account the possibility of being sent on active service. He had made up his mind that he would not go under any circumstances, but fortune was against him.

Mulcahy hadn't considered the chance of being sent to active duty. He was convinced he wouldn’t go no matter what, but luck wasn't on his side.

‘Sick—you?’ said the doctor, who had served an unholy apprenticeship to his trade in Tralee poorhouses. ‘You’re only home-sick, and what you call varicose veins come from over-eating. A little gentle exercise will cure that.’ And later, ‘Mulcahy, my man, everybody is allowed to apply for a sick-certificate ONCE. If he tries it twice we call him by an ugly name. Go back to your duty, and let’s hear no more of your diseases.’

‘Sick—you?’ said the doctor, who had spent a rough apprenticeship in the poorhouses of Tralee. ‘You’re just homesick, and what you think are varicose veins are actually from over-eating. A bit of light exercise will fix that.’ And later, ‘Mulcahy, my friend, everyone is allowed to ask for a sick note ONCE. If he tries it again, we call him something unpleasant. Get back to your duties, and let’s not discuss your ailments anymore.’

I am ashamed to say that Horse Egan enjoyed the study of Mulcahy’s soul in those days, and Dan took an equal interest. Together they would communicate to their corporal all the dark lore of death which is the portion of those who have seen men die. Egan had the larger experience, but Dan the finer imagination. Mulcahy shivered when the former spoke of the knife as an intimate acquaintance, or the latter dwelt with loving particularity on the fate of those who, wounded and helpless, had been overlooked by the ambulances, and had fallen into the hands of the Afghan women-folk.

I’m embarrassed to admit that Horse Egan found it fascinating to explore Mulcahy’s soul back then, and Dan was just as interested. Together, they would share with their corporal all the grim knowledge of death that comes from witnessing men die. Egan had more experience, but Dan had a more vivid imagination. Mulcahy would shiver when Egan mentioned the knife as if it were an old friend, or when Dan described in loving detail the fate of those who, wounded and helpless, had been missed by the ambulances and ended up with the Afghan women.

Mulcahy knew that the mutiny, for the present at least, was dead; knew, too, that a change had come over Dan’s usually respectful attitude towards him, and Horse Egan’s laughter and frequent allusions to abortive conspiracies emphasised all that the conspirator had guessed. The horrible fascination of the death-stories, however, made him seek the men’s society. He learnt much more than he had bargained for; and in this manner: It was on the last night before the regiment entrained to the front. The barracks were stripped of everything movable, and the men were too excited to sleep. The bare walls gave out a heavy hospital smell of chloride of lime.

Mulcahy realized that the mutiny, at least for now, was over. He also noticed that Dan’s usually respectful attitude toward him had changed, and Horse Egan’s laughter and constant references to failed conspiracies highlighted everything the conspirator had sensed. The disturbing allure of the death stories, however, drew him into the company of the men. He learned a lot more than he had expected, and this happened on the last night before the regiment left for the front. The barracks were empty of anything movable, and the men were too excited to sleep. The bare walls emitted a strong hospital smell of chloride of lime.

‘And what,’ said Mulcahy in an awe-stricken whisper, after some conversation on the eternal subject, ‘are you going to do to me, Dan?’ This might have been the language of an able conspirator conciliating a weak spirit.

‘And what,’ Mulcahy said in a stunned whisper, after some talk about the old topic, ‘are you going to do to me, Dan?’ This could have been the tone of a clever schemer trying to win over a fragile mind.

‘You’ll see,’ said Dan grimly, turning over in his cot, ‘or I rather shud say you’ll not see.’

'You'll see,' Dan said grimly, turning over in his cot, 'or I should say you won't see.'

This was hardly the language of a weak spirit. Mulcahy shook under the bed-clothes.

This was definitely not the language of a weak person. Mulcahy trembled under the blankets.

‘Be easy with him,’ put in Egan from the next cot. ‘He has got his chanst o’ goin’ clean. Listen, Mulcahy; all we want is for the good sake of the regiment that you take your death standing up, as a man shud. There be heaps an’ heaps of enemy—plenshus heaps. Go there an’ do all you can and die decent. You’ll die with a good name THERE. ‘Tis not a hard thing considerin’.’

‘Take it easy on him,’ Egan chimed in from the next cot. ‘He has a chance to go out clean. Listen, Mulcahy; all we want is for the sake of the regiment that you face your death standing up, like a man should. There are plenty of enemies—lots of them. Go out there and do your best, and die with dignity. You’ll leave with a good name THERE. It's not a hard thing to think about.’

Again Mulcahy shivered.

Mulcahy shivered again.

‘An’ how could a man wish to die better than fightin’?’ added Dan consolingly.

‘And how could a man wish to die better than fighting?’ added Dan reassuringly.

‘And if I won’t?’ said the corporal in a dry whisper.

‘And what if I don't?’ said the corporal in a dry whisper.

‘There’ll be a dale of smoke,’ returned Dan, sitting up and ticking off the situation on his fingers, ‘sure to be, an’ the noise of the firin’ ‘ll be tremenjus, an’ we’ll be running about up and down, the regiment will. But WE, Horse and I—we’ll stay by you, Mulcahy, and never let you go. Maybe there’ll be an accident.’

‘There will definitely be a lot of smoke,’ Dan replied, sitting up and counting the situation on his fingers. ‘There’s sure to be, and the sound of the firing will be tremendous, and the regiment will be running around all over the place. But WE, Horse and I—we’ll stick with you, Mulcahy, and won’t leave you behind. There might be an accident.’

‘It’s playing it low on me. Let me go. For pity’s sake let me go. I never did you harm, and—and I stood you as much beer as I could. Oh, don’t be hard on me, Dan! You are—you were in it too. You won’t kill me up there, will you?’

‘It’s taking it easy on me. Let me go. For heaven's sake, let me go. I never did you any harm, and—and I bought you as much beer as I could. Oh, don’t be cruel to me, Dan! You are—you were involved too. You won’t kill me up there, will you?’

‘I’m not thinkin’ of the treason; though you shud be glad any honest boys drank with you. It’s for the regiment. We can’t have the shame o’ you bringin’ shame on us. You went to the doctor quiet as a sick cat to get and stay behind an’ live with the women at the depot—you that wanted us to run to the sea in wolf-packs like the rebels none of your black blood dared to be! But WE knew about your goin’ to the doctor, for he told in mess, and it’s all over the regiment. Bein’, as we are, your best friends, we didn’t allow any one to molest you YET. We will see to you ourselves. Fight which you will—us or the enemy—you’ll never lie in that cot again, and there’s more glory and maybe less kicks from fightin’ the enemy. That’s fair speakin’.’

“I’m not thinking about the treason; although you should be glad any decent guys drank with you. It’s for the regiment. We can’t have the shame of you bringing shame on us. You went to the doctor quietly, like a sick cat, to get out of fighting and live with the women at the depot—you who wanted us to charge to the sea in wolf-packs like the rebels none of your kind dared to be! But we knew about your visit to the doctor because he mentioned it in mess, and it’s all over the regiment. Being your closest friends, we haven’t allowed anyone to mess with you YET. We'll take care of you ourselves. Fight whoever you want—us or the enemy—you'll never lie in that cot again, and there’s more glory and maybe fewer blows from fighting the enemy. That’s fair talk.”

‘And he told us by word of mouth to go and join with the niggers—you’ve forgotten that, Dan,’ said Horse Egan, to justify sentence.

‘And he told us in person to go and join with the people—you’ve forgotten that, Dan,’ said Horse Egan, to justify the sentence.

‘What’s the use of plaguin’ the man? One shot pays for all. Sleep ye sound, Mulcahy. But you onderstand, do ye not?’

‘What’s the point of bothering the guy? One shot covers everything. Sleep well, Mulcahy. But you understand, right?’

Mulcahy for some weeks understood very little of anything at all save that ever at his elbow, in camp, or at parade, stood two big men with soft voices adjuring him to commit hari-kari lest a worse thing should happen—to die for the honour of the regiment in decency among the nearest knives. But Mulcahy dreaded death. He remembered certain things that priests had said in his infancy, and his mother—not the one at New York—starting from her sleep with shrieks to pray for a husband’s soul in torment. It is well to be of a cultured intelligence, but in time of trouble the weak human mind returns to the creed it sucked in at the breast, and if that creed be not a pretty one trouble follows. Also, the death he would have to face would be physically painful. Most conspirators have large imaginations. Mulcahy could see himself, as he lay on the earth in the night, dying by various causes. They were all horrible; the mother in New York was very far away, and the Regiment, the engine that, once you fall in its grip, moves you forward whether you will or won’t, was daily coming closer to the enemy!

Mulcahy had been struggling for weeks, understanding almost nothing except that two big guys with soft voices were always nearby, urging him to take his own life to avoid something worse—dying for the honor of the regiment in a neat way among the nearest knives. But Mulcahy was afraid of death. He remembered certain things the priests said when he was a child and how his mother—not the one in New York—would wake up screaming to pray for a husband’s soul in distress. It’s good to have a cultured mind, but in tough times, the fragile human brain often falls back on the beliefs it absorbed as a child, and if those beliefs aren’t comforting, trouble follows. Also, the death he would face would be physically painful. Most conspirators have vivid imaginations. Mulcahy could picture himself lying in the dirt at night, dying in various horrific ways. They were all terrifying; the mother in New York was very far away, and the Regiment, the force that, once it has you in its grip, pushes you forward whether you like it or not, was getting closer to the enemy every day!

They were brought to the field of Marzun-Katai, and with the Black Boneens to aid, they fought a fight that has never been set down in the newspapers. In response, many believe, to the fervent prayers of Father Dennis, the enemy not only elected to fight in the open, but made a beautiful fight, as many weeping Irish mothers knew later. They gathered behind walls or flickered across the open in shouting masses, and were pot-valiant in artillery. It was expedient to hold a large reserve and wait for the psychological moment that was being prepared by the shrieking shrapnel. Therefore the Mavericks lay down in open order on the brow of a hill to watch the play till their call should come. Father Dennis, whose duty was in the rear, to smooth the trouble of the wounded, had naturally managed to make his way to the foremost of his boys and lay like a black porpoise, at length on the grass. To him crawled Mulcahy, ashen-gray, demanding absolution.

They were taken to the Marzun-Katai field, and with the Black Boneens' help, they fought a battle that has never been reported in the newspapers. Many believe it was due to the passionate prayers of Father Dennis that the enemy chose to fight out in the open and put on a great show, as many grieving Irish mothers later realized. They clustered behind walls or rushed across the open field in shouting groups, bravely standing up to artillery fire. It was wise to keep a large reserve and wait for the right moment, which was being set up by the deafening shrapnel. So, the Mavericks lay down in open formation on the hilltop to watch the action until it was their turn. Father Dennis, whose job was to care for the wounded in the rear, had naturally made his way to the front lines and laid down like a dark porpoise on the grass. Mulcahy crawled over to him, pale and desperate, asking for absolution.

‘Wait till you’re shot,’ said Father Dennis sweetly. ‘There’s a time for everything.’

‘Wait until you’re shot,’ Father Dennis said gently. ‘There’s a time for everything.’

Dan Grady chuckled as he blew for the fiftieth time into the breech of his speckless rifle. Mulcahy groaned and buried his head in his arms till a stray shot spoke like a snipe immediately above his head, and a general heave and tremour rippled the line. Other shots followed and a few took effect, as a shriek or a grunt attested. The officers, who had been lying down with the men, rose and began to walk steadily up and down the front of their companies.

Dan Grady laughed as he blew into the breech of his spotless rifle for the fiftieth time. Mulcahy sighed and buried his head in his arms until a stray shot rang out like a snipe above him, causing a general shudder to ripple through the line. More shots fired, and a few found their mark, as evidenced by a scream or a grunt. The officers, who had been lying down with the men, got up and started to pace steadily along the front of their companies.

This manoeuvre, executed, not for publication, but as a guarantee of good faith, to soothe men, demands nerve. You must not hurry, you must not look nervous, though you know that you are a mark for every rifle within extreme range, and above all if you are smitten you must make as little noise as possible and roll inwards through the files. It is at this hour, when the breeze brings the first salt whiff of the powder to noses rather cold at the tip, and the eye can quietly take in the appearance of each red casualty, that the strain on the nerves is strongest. Scotch regiments can endure for half a day and abate no whit of their zeal at the end; English regiments sometimes sulk under punishment, while the Irish, like the French, are apt to run forward by ones and twos, which is just as bad as running back. The truly wise commandant of highly strung troops allows them, in seasons of waiting, to hear the sound of their own voices uplifted in song. There is a legend of an English regiment that lay by its arms under fire chaunting ‘Sam Hall,’ to the horror of its newly appointed and pious colonel. The Black Boneens, who were suffering more than the Mavericks, on a hill half a mile away, began presently to explain to all who cared to listen—

This maneuver, done not for show but as a sign of good faith to reassure the men, takes courage. You can’t rush it or look anxious, even though you know you’re a target for every rifle within range. If you do get hit, you need to stay quiet and roll inward through the ranks. It’s at this moment, when the breeze carries the first salty scent of gunpowder to the cold tips of your noses, and you can calmly take in the sight of each red casualty, that the tension is highest. Scottish regiments can endure for half a day without losing any of their enthusiasm at the end; English regiments sometimes sulk under pressure, while the Irish, like the French, tend to rush forward in ones and twos, which is just as bad as retreating. The truly wise commander of highly strung troops lets them entertain themselves during waiting periods by singing. There’s a story about an English regiment that, while under fire, sang “Sam Hall,” much to the shock of its newly appointed and overly pious colonel. The Black Boneens, who were suffering more than the Mavericks on a hill half a mile away, soon began to explain to everyone who would listen—

We’ll sound the jubilee, from the centre to the sea, And Ireland shall be free, says the Shan-van Vogh.

We’ll celebrate from the center to the sea, and Ireland will be free, says the Shan-van Vogh.

‘Sing, boys,’ said Father Dennis softly. ‘It looks as if we cared for their Afghan peas.’

‘Sing, boys,’ Father Dennis said softly. ‘It seems like we cared about their Afghan peas.’

Dan Grady raised himself to his knees and opened his mouth in a song imparted to him, as to most of his comrades, in the strictest confidence by Mulcahy—-the Mulcahy then lying limp and fainting on the grass, the chill fear of death upon him.

Dan Grady got on his knees and began to sing a song that had been shared with him, as well as most of his friends, in the strictest confidence by Mulcahy—who was now lying weak and unconscious on the grass, filled with a chilling fear of death.

Company after company caught up the words which, the I. A. A. say, are to herald the general rising of Erin, and to breathe which, except to those duly appointed to hear, is death. Wherefore they are printed in this place.

Company after company took up the words that the I.A.A. claims are meant to announce the overall awakening of Ireland, and to speak them, except to those specifically designated to hear, is a death sentence. That's why they are printed here.

     The Saxon in Heaven’s just balance is weighed,
       His doom like Belshazzar’s in death has been cast,
     And the hand of the venger shall never be stayed
       Till his race, faith, and speech are a dream of the past.
     The Saxon in Heaven’s scale is measured,  
       His fate like Belshazzar’s has been sealed,  
     And the hand of the avenger will never be stopped  
       Until his race, faith, and language are just a memory.  

They were heart-filling lines and they ran with a swirl; the I. A. A. are better served by their pens than their petards. Dan clapped Mulcahy merrily on the back, asking him to sing up. The officers lay down again. There was no need to walk any more. Their men were soothing themselves thunderously, thus—

They were uplifting lines that flowed smoothly; the I. A. A. are better at expressing themselves with their pens than with their weapons. Dan happily patted Mulcahy on the back, encouraging him to sing. The officers laid back down. There was no need to walk anymore. Their men were calming themselves loudly, like this—

     St. Mary in Heaven has written the vow
       That the land shall not rest till the heretic blood,
     From the babe at the breast to the hand at the plough,
       Has rolled to the ocean like Shannon in flood!
     St. Mary in Heaven has written the vow
       That the land shall not rest until the heretic blood,
     From the baby at the breast to the hand at the plow,
       Has flowed to the ocean like the Shannon in flood!

‘I’ll speak to you after all’s over,’ said Father Dennis authoritatively in Dan’s ear. ‘What’s the use of confessing to me when you do this foolishness? Dan, you’ve been playing with fire! I’ll lay you more penance in a week than—’

‘I’ll talk to you after everything’s done,’ Father Dennis said firmly in Dan’s ear. ‘What’s the point of confessing to me when you keep acting like this? Dan, you’ve been playing with fire! I’ll give you more penance in a week than—’

‘Come along to Purgatory with us, Father dear. The Boneens are on the move; they’ll let us go now!’

‘Come along to Purgatory with us, Dad. The Boneens are on the move; they’ll let us go now!’

The regiment rose to the blast of the bugle as one man; but one man there was who rose more swiftly than all the others, for half an inch of bayonet was in the fleshy part of his leg.

The regiment stood up at the sound of the bugle all together; but there was one person who got up faster than everyone else, because half an inch of bayonet was lodged in the soft part of his leg.

‘You’ve got to do it,’ said Dan grimly. ‘Do it decent, anyhow;’ and the roar of the rush drowned his words, for the rear companies thrust forward the first, still singing as they swung down the slope—-

‘You have to do it,’ Dan said seriously. ‘Just do it right, at least;’ and the sound of the rushing water drowned his words, as the rear companies pushed forward the first, still singing as they moved down the slope—

From the child at the breast to the hand at the plough Shall roll to the ocean like Shannon in flood!

From the breastfeeding baby to the person at the plow, They will flow to the ocean like the Shannon in full sweep!

They should have sung it in the face of England, not of the Afghans, whom, it impressed as much as did the wild Irish yell.

They should have sung it in front of England, not in front of the Afghans, who were affected just as much as by the wild Irish yell.

‘They came down singing,’ said the unofficial report of the enemy, borne from village to village the next day. ‘They continued to sing, and it was written that our men could not abide when they came. It is believed that there was magic in the aforesaid song.’

‘They came down singing,’ said the unofficial report from the enemy, passed from village to village the next day. ‘They kept singing, and it was said that our men couldn’t stand it when they arrived. People believe there was magic in that song.’

Dan and Horse Egan kept themselves in the neighbourhood of Mulcahy. Twice the man would have bolted back in the confusion. Twice he was heaved, kicked, and shouldered back again into the unpaintable inferno of a hotly contested charge.

Dan and Horse Egan stayed around Mulcahy. Twice the man almost ran back in the chaos. Twice he was pushed, kicked, and shoved back into the unbearable heat of a fiercely contested charge.

At the end, the panic excess of his fear drove him into madness beyond all human courage. His eyes staring at nothing, his mouth open and frothing, and breathing as one in a cold bath, he went forward demented, while Dan toiled after him. The charge checked at a high mud wall. It was Mulcahy who scrambled up tooth and nail and hurled down among the bayonets the amazed Afghan who barred his way. It was Mulcahy, keeping to the straight line of the rabid dog, who led a collection of ardent souls at a newly unmasked battery and flung himself on the muzzle of a gun as his companions danced among the gunners. It was Mulcahy who ran wildly on from that battery into the open plain, where the enemy were retiring in sullen groups. His hands were empty, he had lost helmet and belt, and he was bleeding from a wound in the neck. Dan and Horse Egan, panting and distressed, had thrown themselves down on the ground by the captured guns, when they noticed Mulcahy’s charge.

At the end, the overwhelming panic of his fear drove him into madness beyond anything human courage could withstand. His eyes were vacant, his mouth was open and frothing, and he was breathing like someone in a cold bath as he moved forward in a daze, while Dan chased after him. The assault paused at a tall mud wall. It was Mulcahy who clambered up fiercely and threw down among the bayonets the stunned Afghan who stood in his way. It was Mulcahy, staying fierce like a rabid dog, who rallied a group of determined souls at a newly revealed battery and threw himself onto the muzzle of a cannon while his companions danced around the gunners. It was Mulcahy who ran wildly from that battery into the open plain, where the enemy was retreating in gloomy groups. His hands were empty, he had lost his helmet and belt, and he was bleeding from a wound in his neck. Dan and Horse Egan, gasping and distressed, had collapsed on the ground beside the captured guns when they spotted Mulcahy’s charge.

‘Mad,’ said Horse Egan critically. ‘Mad with fear! He’s going straight to his death, an’ shouting’s no use.’

'He's crazy,' Horse Egan said critically. 'Crazy with fear! He's heading straight to his death, and yelling won't help.'

‘Let him go. Watch now! If we fire we’ll hit him, maybe.’

‘Let him go. Watch! If we shoot, we might hit him.’

The last of a hurrying crowd of Afghans turned at the noise of shod feet behind him, and shifted his knife ready to hand. This, he saw, was no time to take prisoners. Mulcahy tore on, sobbing; the straight-held blade went home through the defenceless breast, and the body pitched forward almost before a shot from Dan’s rifle brought down the slayer and still further hurried the Afghan retreat. The two Irishmen went out to bring in their dead.

The last of a rushing crowd of Afghans turned at the sound of footsteps behind him and got his knife ready. He realized this was no time to take prisoners. Mulcahy rushed on, sobbing; the straight knife went deep into the unprotected chest, and the body fell forward almost instantly before a shot from Dan’s rifle took down the killer and sped up the Afghan retreat. The two Irishmen went out to recover their dead.

‘He was given the point and that was an easy death,’ said Horse Egan, viewing the corpse. ‘But would you ha’ shot him, Danny, if he had lived?’

‘He got the point, and that was an easy death,’ said Horse Egan, looking at the body. ‘But would you have shot him, Danny, if he had survived?’

‘He didn’t live, so there’s no sayin’. But I doubt I wud have bekase of the fun he gave us—let alone the beer. Hike up his legs, Horse, and we’ll bring him in. Perhaps ‘tis better this way.’

‘He didn’t live, so there’s no way to know. But I doubt I would have because of the fun he gave us—let alone the beer. Lift his legs, Horse, and we’ll bring him in. Maybe it’s better this way.’

They bore the poor limp body to the mass of the regiment, lolling open-mouthed on their rifles; and there was a general snigger when one of the younger subalterns said, ‘That was a good man!’

They carried the poor lifeless body to the group of the regiment, lying open-mouthed on their rifles; and there was a general snicker when one of the younger junior officers said, ‘That was a good man!’

‘Phew,’ said Horse Egan, when a burial-party had taken over the burden. ‘I’m powerful dhry, and this reminds me there’ll be no more beer at all.’

‘Phew,’ said Horse Egan, when a burial party had taken over the burden. ‘I’m really thirsty, and this reminds me there won’t be any more beer at all.’

‘Fwhy not?’ said Dan, with a twinkle in his eye as he stretched himself for rest. ‘Are we not conspirin’ all we can, an’ while we conspire are we not entitled to free dhrinks? Sure his ould mother in New York would not let her son’s comrades perish of drouth—if she can be reached at the end of a letter.’

‘Why not?’ said Dan, with a sparkle in his eye as he settled in to relax. ‘Aren't we doing all we can to conspire, and while we're at it, aren’t we entitled to free drinks? Surely his old mother in New York wouldn’t let her son’s friends suffer from thirst—if she can be reached by mail.’

‘You’re a janius,’ said Horse Egan. ‘O’ coorse she will not. I wish this crool war was over an’ we’d get back to canteen. Faith, the Commander-in-Chief ought to be hanged in his own little sword-belt for makin’ us work on wather.’

‘You’re a genius,’ said Horse Egan. ‘Of course she won’t. I wish this cruel war was over and we could get back to the canteen. Honestly, the Commander-in-Chief should be hanged by his own little sword-belt for making us work in water.’

The Mavericks were generally of Horse Egan’s opinion. So they made haste to get their work done as soon as possible, and their industry was rewarded by unexpected peace. ‘We can fight the sons of Adam,’ said the tribesmen, ‘but we cannot fight the sons of Eblis, and this regiment never stays still in one place. Let us therefore come in.’ They came in and ‘this regiment’ withdrew to conspire under the leadership of Dan Grady.

The Mavericks mostly agreed with Horse Egan. So, they rushed to finish their work as quickly as they could, and their efforts were rewarded with unexpected peace. "We can fight the sons of Adam," the tribesmen said, "but we can't fight the sons of Eblis, and this regiment never stays in one place. So let's come in." They came in, and "this regiment" retreated to plot under the leadership of Dan Grady.

Excellent as a subordinate Dan failed altogether as a chief-in-command—possibly because he was too much swayed by the advice of the only man in the regiment who could manufacture more than one kind of handwriting. The same mail that bore to Mulcahy’s mother in New York a letter from the colonel telling her how valiantly her son had fought for the Queen, and how assuredly he would have been recommended for the Victoria Cross had he survived, carried a communication signed, I grieve to say, by that same colonel and all the officers of the regiment, explaining their willingness to do ‘anything which is contrary to the regulations and all kinds of revolutions’ if only a little money could be forwarded to cover incidental expenses. Daniel Grady, Esquire, would receive funds, vice Mulcahy, who ‘was unwell at this present time of writing.’

Dan was great as a subordinate but completely failed as a leader—maybe because he was too influenced by the advice of the only guy in the regiment who could write in more than one style. The same mail that delivered a letter from the colonel to Mulcahy’s mother in New York, praising how bravely her son fought for the Queen and asserting that he would’ve been recommended for the Victoria Cross if he had survived, also included a note signed, regrettably, by that same colonel and all the officers of the regiment. It explained their willingness to do “anything against regulations or any kind of revolutions” if only a bit of money could be forwarded to cover miscellaneous expenses. Daniel Grady, Esquire, would receive the funds, instead of Mulcahy, who “was unwell at this time of writing.”

Both letters were forwarded from New York to Tehama Street, San Francisco, with marginal comments as brief as they were bitter. The Third Three read and looked at each other. Then the Second Conspirator-he who believed in ‘joining hands with the practical branches’—-began to laugh, and on recovering his gravity said, ‘Gentlemen, I consider this will be a lesson to us. We’re left again. Those cursed Irish have let us down. I knew they would, but’-here he laughed afresh-’I’d give considerable to know what was at the back of it all.’

Both letters were sent from New York to Tehama Street, San Francisco, with comments that were as short as they were harsh. The Third Three read them and exchanged glances. Then the Second Conspirator—who believed in "joining hands with the practical branches"—started to laugh, and after he composed himself, he said, "Gentlemen, I think this will teach us a lesson. We've been left out again. Those damn Irish have let us down. I knew they would, but"—he laughed again—"I’d really like to know what’s behind all this."

His curiosity would have been satisfied had he seen Dan Grady, discredited regimental conspirator, trying to explain to his thirsty comrades in India the non-arrival of funds from New York.

His curiosity would have been satisfied if he had seen Dan Grady, the disgraced regimental conspirator, trying to explain to his thirsty comrades in India why the funds from New York hadn’t arrived.





THE MARK OF THE BEAST

Your Gods and my Gods-do you or I know which are the stronger? Native Proverb.

Your gods and my gods—do you or I know which are stronger? Native Proverb.

EAST of Suez, some hold, the direct control of Providence ceases; Man being there handed over to the power of the Gods and Devils of Asia, and the Church of England Providence only exercising an occasional and modified supervision in the case of Englishmen.

EAST of Suez, some believe that the direct control of Providence ends; people there are left at the mercy of the Gods and Devils of Asia, with the Church of England's Providence only offering occasional and limited oversight when it comes to Englishmen.

This theory accounts for some of the more unnecessary horrors of life in India: it may be stretched to explain my story.

This theory explains some of the more pointless horrors of life in India: it can be extended to clarify my story.

My friend Strickland of the Police, who knows as much of natives of India as is good for any man, can bear witness to the facts of the case. Dumoise, our doctor, also saw what Strickland and I saw. The inference which he drew from the evidence was entirely incorrect. He is dead now; he died, in a rather curious manner, which has been elsewhere described.

My friend Strickland from the police, who knows just enough about the people of India for anyone's good, can confirm the facts of the case. Dumoise, our doctor, also witnessed what Strickland and I saw. The conclusion he reached from the evidence was completely wrong. He’s dead now; he passed away in a rather strange way, which has been explained elsewhere.

When Fleete came to India he owned a little money and some land in the Himalayas, near a place called Dharmsala. Both properties had been left him by an uncle, and he came out to finance them. He was a big, heavy, genial, and inoffensive man. His knowledge of natives was, of course, limited, and he complained of the difficulties of the language.

When Fleete arrived in India, he had a bit of money and some land in the Himalayas, near a place called Dharmsala. Both properties had been inherited from an uncle, and he came to manage them. He was a large, easygoing, and harmless man. His understanding of the locals was, of course, limited, and he often complained about the challenges of the language.

He rode in from his place in the hills to spend New Year in the station, and he stayed with Strickland. On New Year’s Eve there was a big dinner at the club, and the night was excusably wet. When men foregather from the uttermost ends of the Empire, they have a right to be riotous. The Frontier had sent down a contingent o’ Catch-’em-Alive-O’s who had not seen twenty white faces for a year, and were used to ride fifteen miles to dinner at the next Fort at the risk of a Khyberee bullet where their drinks should lie. They profited by their new security, for they tried to play pool with a curled-up hedgehog found in the garden, and one of them carried the marker round the room in his teeth. Half a dozen planters had come in from the south and were talking ‘horse’ to the Biggest Liar in Asia, who was trying to cap all their stories at once. Everybody was there, and there was a general closing up of ranks and taking stock of our losses in dead or disabled that had fallen during the past year. It was a very wet night, and I remember that we sang ‘Auld Lang Syne’ with our feet in the Polo Championship Cup, and our heads among the stars, and swore that we were all dear friends. Then some of us went away and annexed Burma, and some tried to open up the Soudan and were opened up by Fuzzies in that cruel scrub outside Suakim, and some found stars and medals, and some were married, which was bad, and some did other things which were worse, and the others of us stayed in our chains and strove to make money on insufficient experiences.

He rode in from his place in the hills to spend New Year at the station and stayed with Strickland. On New Year’s Eve, there was a big dinner at the club, and the night was understandably wet. When people gather from the farthest corners of the Empire, they have a right to celebrate wildly. The Frontier had sent down a group of Catch-’em-Alive-O’s who hadn’t seen twenty white faces in a year, and were used to riding fifteen miles for dinner at the next Fort, risking a Khyberee bullet for their drinks. They took advantage of their newfound safety; one tried to play pool with a curled-up hedgehog found in the garden, and another carried the marker around the room in his teeth. Half a dozen planters had come in from the south and were talking ‘horse’ to the Biggest Liar in Asia, who was trying to outdo all their stories at once. Everyone was there, and there was a general gathering to assess our losses in dead or disabled from the past year. It was a very wet night, and I remember we sang ‘Auld Lang Syne’ with our feet in the Polo Championship Cup and our heads among the stars, vowing that we were all dear friends. Then some of us went off and took over Burma, some tried to explore the Soudan but were confronted by Fuzzies in that harsh scrub outside Suakim, some earned stars and medals, some got married, which was unfortunate, and others did worse things, while the rest of us stayed in our routines and tried to make money with limited experiences.

Fleete began the night with sherry and bitters, drank champagne steadily up to dessert, then raw, rasping Capri with all the strength of whisky, took Benedictine with his coffee, four or five whiskies and sodas to improve his pool strokes, beer and bones at half-past two, winding up with old brandy. Consequently, when he came out, at half-past three in the morning, into fourteen degrees of frost, he was very angry with his horse for coughing, and tried to leapfrog into the saddle. The horse broke away and went to his stables; so Strickland and I formed a Guard of Dishonour to take Fleete home.

Fleete started the night with sherry and bitters, steadily drank champagne until dessert, then downed harsh, biting Capri like whisky, had Benedictine with his coffee, followed by four or five whisky and sodas to improve his pool game, and then beer and snacks at half-past two, finishing off with some old brandy. So, when he stepped outside at half-past three in the morning into fifteen degrees of frost, he was really angry at his horse for coughing and tried to jump onto the saddle. The horse bolted off to the stables, so Strickland and I acted as a Guard of Dishonour to get Fleete home.

Our road lay through the bazaar, close to a little temple of Hanuman, the Monkey-god, who is a leading divinity worthy of respect. All gods have good points, just as have all priests. Personally, I attach much importance to Hanuman, and am kind to his people—the great gray apes of the hills. One never knows when one may want a friend.

Our path took us through the marketplace, near a small temple dedicated to Hanuman, the Monkey-god, who is a significant deity deserving of respect. Every god has their positive traits, just like every priest. Personally, I hold Hanuman in high regard and treat his followers—the large gray apes from the hills—with kindness. You never know when you might need a friend.

There was a light in the temple, and as we passed, we could hear voices of men chanting hymns. In a native temple, the priests rise at all hours of the night to do honour to their god. Before we could stop him, Fleete dashed up the steps, patted two priests on the back, and was gravely grinding the ashes of his cigar-butt into the forehead of the red stone image of Hanuman. Strickland tried to drag him out, but he sat down and said solemnly:

There was a light in the temple, and as we walked by, we could hear men chanting hymns. In a native temple, the priests get up at all hours of the night to honor their god. Before we could stop him, Fleete rushed up the steps, patted two priests on the back, and was seriously grinding the ashes of his cigar butt into the forehead of the red stone image of Hanuman. Strickland tried to pull him away, but he sat down and said seriously:

‘Shee that? ‘Mark of the B-beasht! I made it. Ishn’t it fine?’

‘See that? ‘Mark of the Beast! I made it. Isn't it great?’

In half a minute the temple was alive and noisy, and Strickland, who knew what came of polluting gods, said that things might occur. He, by virtue of his official position, long residence in the country, and weakness for going among the natives, was known to the priests and he felt unhappy. Fleete sat on the ground and refused to move. He said that ‘good old Hanuman’ made a very soft pillow.

In just thirty seconds, the temple was buzzing with life and noise, and Strickland, who understood the consequences of disrespecting the gods, warned that something could happen. Because of his official position, long time spent in the country, and tendency to mingle with the locals, he was known to the priests, and he felt uneasy. Fleete sat on the ground and wouldn’t budge. He said that “good old Hanuman” made a really comfy pillow.

Then, without any warning, a Silver Man came out of a recess behind the image of the god. He was perfectly naked in that bitter, bitter cold, and his body shone like frosted silver, for he was what the Bible calls ‘a leper as white as snow.’ Also he had no face, because he was a leper of some years’ standing and his disease was heavy upon him. We two stooped to haul Fleete up, and the temple was filling and filling with folk who seemed to spring from the earth, when the Silver Man ran in under our arms, making a noise exactly like the mewing of an otter, caught Fleete round the body and dropped his head on Fleete’s breast before we could wrench him away. Then he retired to a corner and sat mewing while the crowd blocked all the doors.

Then, without any warning, a Silver Man stepped out from a space behind the image of the god. He was completely naked in that bitter, bitter cold, and his body gleamed like frosted silver, for he was what the Bible calls ‘a leper as white as snow.’ He also had no face, as he had been afflicted for some years and his disease had taken a heavy toll on him. The two of us bent down to lift Fleete up, and the temple was getting packed with people who seemed to appear from nowhere when the Silver Man dashed in under our arms, making a sound similar to the mewing of an otter. He wrapped his arms around Fleete’s body and laid his head on Fleete’s chest before we could pull him away. Then he retreated to a corner and continued mewing while the crowd blocked all the exits.

The priests were very angry until the Silver Man touched Fleete. That nuzzling seemed to sober them.

The priests were really angry until the Silver Man touched Fleete. That nuzzling seemed to calm them down.

At the end of a few minutes’ silence one of the priests came to Strickland and said, in perfect English, ‘Take your friend away. He has done with Hanuman, but Hanurnan has not done with him.’ The crowd gave room and we carried Fleete into the road.

At the end of a few minutes of silence, one of the priests approached Strickland and said in flawless English, “Take your friend away. He’s finished with Hanuman, but Hanuman hasn’t finished with him.” The crowd moved aside, and we carried Fleete into the street.

Strickland was very angry. He said that we might all three have been knifed, and that Fleete should thank his stars that he had escaped without injury.

Strickland was really angry. He said that all three of us could've been stabbed, and that Fleete should be thankful that he got away unharmed.

Fleete thanked no one. He said that he wanted to go to bed. He was gorgeously drunk.

Fleete didn’t thank anyone. He said he wanted to go to bed. He was beautifully drunk.

We moved on, Strickland silent and wrathful, until Fleete was taken with violent shivering fits and sweating. He said that the smells of the bazaar were overpowering, and he wondered why slaughter-houses were permitted so near English residences. ‘Can’t you smell the blood?’ said Fleete.

We continued on, Strickland quiet and angry, until Fleete was hit with violent shivers and sweating. He said the smells from the market were too much, and he questioned why slaughterhouses were allowed so close to English homes. “Can’t you smell the blood?” Fleete asked.

We put him to bed at last, just as the dawn was breaking, and Strickland invited me to have another whisky and soda. While we were drinking he talked of the trouble in the temple, and admitted that it baffled him completely. Strickland hates being mystified by natives, because his business in life is to overmatch them with their own weapons. He has not yet succeeded in doing this, but in fifteen or twenty years he will have made some small progress.

We finally got him to bed right as dawn was breaking, and Strickland invited me to have another whisky and soda. While we were drinking, he talked about the trouble at the temple and admitted that it completely confused him. Strickland hates being puzzled by locals because his goal in life is to outsmart them using their own tactics. He hasn't succeeded in doing that yet, but in fifteen or twenty years, he’ll have made some progress.

‘They should have mauled us,’ he said, ‘instead of mewing at us. I wonder what they meant. I don’t like it one little bit.’

‘They should have attacked us,’ he said, ‘instead of just meowing at us. I wonder what they meant. I don’t like it at all.’

I said that the Managing Committee of the temple would in all probability bring a criminal action against us for insulting their religion. There was a section of the Indian Penal Code which exactly met Fleete’s offence. Strickland said he only hoped and prayed that they would do this. Before I left I looked into Fleete’s room, and saw him lying on his right side, scratching his left breast. Then. I went to bed cold, depressed, and unhappy, at seven o’clock in the morning.

I said that the temple's Managing Committee would likely bring criminal charges against us for insulting their religion. There was a section of the Indian Penal Code that specifically addressed Fleete's offense. Strickland said he only hoped and prayed they would. Before I left, I peeked into Fleete’s room and saw him lying on his right side, scratching his left breast. Then, I went to bed feeling cold, down, and miserable at seven o'clock in the morning.

At one o’clock I rode over to Strickland’s house to inquire after Fleete’s head. I imagined that it would be a sore one. Fleete was breakfasting and seemed unwell. His temper was gone, for he was abusing the cook for not supplying him with an underdone chop. A man who can eat raw meat after a wet night is a curiosity. I told Fleete this and he laughed.

At one o’clock, I rode over to Strickland’s house to check on Fleete’s hangover. I figured it would be pretty bad. Fleete was having breakfast and looked unwell. He had lost his temper, yelling at the cook for not giving him a rare chop. It’s unusual for someone to want to eat raw meat after a night of drinking. I told Fleete this, and he laughed.

‘You breed queer mosquitoes in these parts,’ he said. ‘I’ve been bitten to pieces, but only in one place.’

‘You breed odd mosquitoes around here,’ he said. ‘I’ve been bitten all over, but only in one spot.’

‘Let’s have a look at the bite,’ said Strickland. ‘It may have gone down since this morning.’

‘Let’s check the bite,’ said Strickland. ‘It might have improved since this morning.’

While the chops were being cooked, Fleete opened his shirt and showed us, just over his left breast, a mark, the perfect double of the black rosettes—the five or six irregular blotches arranged in a circle—on a leopard’s hide. Strickland looked and said, ‘It was only pink this morning. It’s grown black now.’

While the chops were cooking, Fleete opened his shirt and showed us a mark just above his left breast, the exact double of the black rosettes—the five or six uneven spots arranged in a circle—on a leopard’s skin. Strickland looked and said, ‘It was only pink this morning. It’s turned black now.’

Fleete ran to a glass.

Fleete ran to the glass.

‘By Jove!’ he said,’ this is nasty. What is it?’

‘Wow!’ he said, ‘this is gross. What is it?’

We could not answer. Here the chops came in, all red and juicy, and Fleete bolted three in a most offensive manner. He ate on his right grinders only, and threw his head over his right shoulder as he snapped the meat. When he had finished, it struck him that he had been behaving strangely, for he said apologetically, ‘I don’t think I ever felt so hungry in my life. I’ve bolted like an ostrich.’

We couldn't respond. The chops arrived, all red and juicy, and Fleete aggressively devoured three of them. He only used his right side to eat and tossed his head over his right shoulder as he chewed the meat. Once he finished, it hit him that he had been acting oddly, so he said apologetically, "I don’t think I’ve ever felt so hungry in my life. I chowed down like an ostrich."

After breakfast Strickland said to me, ‘Don’t go. Stay here, and stay for the night.’

After breakfast, Strickland said to me, “Don’t leave. Stick around, and stay for the night.”

Seeing that my house was not three miles from Strickland’s, this request was absurd. But Strickland insisted, and was going to say something when Fleete interrupted by declaring in a shamefaced way that he felt hungry again. Strickland sent a man to my house to fetch over my bedding and a horse, and we three went down to Strickland’s stables to pass the hours until it was time to go out for a ride. The man who has a weakness for horses never wearies of inspecting them; and when two men are killing time in this way they gather knowledge and lies the one from the other.

Seeing that my house was less than three miles from Strickland’s, this request was ridiculous. But Strickland was persistent and was about to say something when Fleete interrupted, sheepishly admitting that he was hungry again. Strickland sent a guy to my house to grab my bedding and a horse, and the three of us went down to Strickland’s stables to kill time until it was time to head out for a ride. A guy who loves horses can never get enough of checking them out, and when two guys are passing the time like this, they pick up both facts and tall tales from each other.

There were five horses in the stables, and I shall never forget the scene as we tried to look them over. They seemed to have gone mad. They reared and screamed and nearly tore up their pickets; they sweated and shivered and lathered and were distraught with fear. Strickland’s horses used to know him as well as his dogs; which made the matter more curious. We left the stable for fear of the brutes throwing themselves in their panic. Then Strickland turned back and called me. The horses were still frightened, but they let us ‘gentle’ and make much of them, and put their heads in our bosoms.

There were five horses in the stables, and I’ll never forget the scene as we tried to check them out. They seemed to have gone wild. They reared up and screamed, almost tearing down their pickets; they sweat, shivered, and were covered in foam, completely overcome with fear. Strickland’s horses used to know him as well as his dogs, which made the situation even more puzzling. We left the stable, afraid the animals would hurt themselves in their panic. Then Strickland turned back and called me. The horses were still scared, but they let us calm them down and snuggle with us, resting their heads against us.

‘They aren’t afraid of US,’ said Strickland. ‘D’you know, I’d give three months’ pay if OUTRAGE here could talk.’

‘They aren't scared of us,’ said Strickland. ‘You know, I'd give three months' salary if OUTRAGE here could speak.’

But Outrage was dumb, and could only cuddle up to his master and blow out his nostrils, as is the custom of horses when they wish to explain things but can’t. Fleete came up when we were in the stalls, and as soon as the horses saw him, their fright broke out afresh. It was all that we could do to escape from the place unkicked. Strickland said, ‘They don’t seem to love you, Fleete.’

But Outrage was clueless and could only snuggle up to his owner and huff through his nostrils, like horses do when they want to communicate but can't. Fleete arrived while we were in the stalls, and as soon as the horses spotted him, their fear flared up again. We could barely manage to leave without getting kicked. Strickland said, “They don’t seem to like you much, Fleete.”

‘Nonsense,’ said Fleete; ‘my mare will follow me like a dog.’ He went to her; she was in a loose-box; but as he slipped the bars she plunged, knocked him down, and broke away into the garden. I laughed, but Strickland was not amused. He took his moustache in both fists and pulled at it till it nearly came out. Fleete, instead of going off to chase his property, yawned, saying that he felt sleepy. He went to the house to lie down, which was a foolish way of spending New Year’s Day.

‘Nonsense,’ said Fleete; ‘my mare will follow me like a dog.’ He went to her; she was in a loose-box; but as he opened the bars, she bolted, knocked him down, and darted into the garden. I laughed, but Strickland didn’t find it funny. He grabbed his moustache with both hands and pulled at it until it almost came out. Instead of running off to catch his horse, Fleete yawned and said he felt sleepy. He went to the house to lie down, which was a silly way to spend New Year’s Day.

Strickland sat with me in the stables and asked if I had noticed anything peculiar in Fleete’s manner. I said that he ate his food like a beast; but that this might have been the result of living alone in the hills out of the reach of society as refined and elevating as ours for instance. Strickland was not amused. I do not think that he listened to me, for his next sentence referred to the mark on Fleete’s breast, and I said that it might have been caused by blister-flies, or that it was possibly a birth-mark newly born and now visible for the first time. We both agreed that it was unpleasant to look at, and Strickland found occasion to say that I was a fool.

Strickland sat with me in the stables and asked if I had noticed anything odd about Fleete's behavior. I said he devoured his food like an animal, but that could just be from living alone in the hills, far away from society as refined and uplifting as ours, for example. Strickland didn’t find that funny. I don’t think he really heard me, because his next comment was about the mark on Fleete’s chest, and I mentioned that it could have been caused by blister-flies, or perhaps it was a birthmark that had just become visible. We both agreed it was unpleasant to look at, and Strickland took the opportunity to call me a fool.

‘I can’t tell you what I think now,’ said he, ‘because you would call me a madman; but you must stay with me for the next few days, if you can. I want you to watch Fleete, but don’t tell me what you think till I have made up my mind.’

‘I can’t tell you what I think right now,’ he said, ‘because you’d think I’m crazy; but you need to stay with me for the next few days, if possible. I want you to keep an eye on Fleete, but don't share your thoughts with me until I’ve made my decision.’

‘But I am dining out to-night,’ I said. ‘So am I,’ said Strickland, ‘and so is Fleete. At least if he doesn’t change his mind.’

‘But I’m going out for dinner tonight,’ I said. ‘So am I,’ Strickland replied, ‘and so is Fleete. At least, if he doesn’t change his mind.’

We walked about the garden smoking, but saying nothing—because we were friends, and talking spoils good tobacco—till our pipes were out. Then we went to wake up Fleete. He was wide awake and fidgeting about his room.

We strolled around the garden smoking in silence—since we were friends, and chatting ruins good tobacco—until our pipes were empty. Then we went to wake up Fleete. He was fully awake and restless in his room.

‘I say, I want some more chops,’ he said. ‘Can I get them?’

‘I want some more chops,’ he said. ‘Can I get them?’

We laughed and said, ‘Go and change. The ponies will be round in a minute.’

We laughed and said, ‘Go get changed. The ponies will be here any minute.’

‘All right,’ said Fleete. I’ll go when I get the chops—underdone ones, mind.’

‘All right,’ said Fleete. I’ll go when I get the chops—rare ones, just so you know.’

He seemed to be quite in earnest. It was four o’clock, and we had had breakfast at one; still, for a long time, he demanded those underdone chops. Then he changed into riding clothes and went out into the verandah. His pony—the mare had not been caught—would not let him come near. All three horses were unmanageable—-mad with fear—-and finally Fleete said that he would stay at home and get something to eat. Strickland and I rode out wondering. As we passed the temple of Hanuman, the Silver Man came out and mewed at us.

He seemed really serious about it. It was four o’clock, and we had breakfast at one, yet he still insisted on those undercooked chops for a long time. Then he changed into riding clothes and went out to the verandah. His pony—the mare hadn’t been caught—wouldn’t let him get close. All three horses were out of control—terrified—and eventually, Fleete said he would stay home and find something to eat. Strickland and I rode out, puzzled. As we passed the temple of Hanuman, the Silver Man came out and meowed at us.

‘He is not one of the regular priests of the temple,’ said Strickland. ‘I think I should peculiarly like to lay my hands on him.’

‘He’s not one of the usual priests at the temple,’ said Strickland. ‘I think I’d really like to get my hands on him.’

There was no spring in our gallop on the racecourse that evening. The horses were stale, and moved as though they had been ridden out.

There was no energy in our gallop on the racecourse that evening. The horses were tired and moved as if they had already been ridden hard.

‘The fright after breakfast has been too much for them,’ said Strickland.

‘The scare after breakfast has been too much for them,’ said Strickland.

That was the only remark he made through the remainder of the ride. Once or twice I think he swore to himself; but that did not count.

That was the only comment he made for the rest of the ride. A couple of times, I think he muttered some swear words under his breath; but that didn’t really matter.

We came back in the dark at seven o’clock, and saw that there were no lights in the bungalow. ‘Careless ruffians my servants are!’ said Strickland.

We came back in the dark at seven o’clock and noticed that there were no lights in the bungalow. ‘My servants are such careless ruffians!’ said Strickland.

My horse reared at something on the carriage drive, and Fleete stood up under its nose.

My horse reared at something on the driveway, and Fleete stood up right in front of it.

‘What are you doing, grovelling about the garden?’ said Strickland.

‘What are you doing, crawling around the garden?’ said Strickland.

But both horses bolted and nearly threw us. We dismounted by the stables and returned to Fleete, who was on his hands and knees under the orange-bushes.

But both horses took off and almost threw us off. We got down by the stables and went back to Fleete, who was on his hands and knees under the orange bushes.

‘What the devil’s wrong with you?’ said Strickland.

‘What the hell is wrong with you?’ said Strickland.

‘Nothing, nothing in the world,’ said Fleete, speaking very quickly and thickly. ‘I’ve been gardening-botanising you know. The smell of the earth is delightful. I think I’m going for a walk-a long walk-all night.’

‘Nothing, nothing in the world,’ said Fleete, speaking very quickly and thickly. ‘I’ve been gardening and studying plants, you know. The smell of the earth is amazing. I think I’m going for a walk—a long walk—all night.’

Then I saw that there was something excessively out of order somewhere, and I said to Strickland, ‘I am not dining out.’

Then I noticed that something was seriously off, and I told Strickland, ‘I’m not going out to eat.’

‘Bless you!’ said Strickland. ‘Here, Fleete, get up. You’ll catch fever there. Come in to dinner and let’s have the lamps lit. We ‘ll all dine at home.’

‘Bless you!’ said Strickland. ‘Come on, Fleete, get up. You’ll catch a fever sitting there. Come in for dinner and let’s get the lights on. We’ll all eat at home.’

Fleete stood up unwillingly, and said, ‘No lamps-no lamps. It’s much nicer here. Let’s dine outside and have some more chops-lots of ‘em and underdone—bloody ones with gristle.’

Fleete stood up reluctantly and said, ‘No lamps—no lamps. It’s much nicer here. Let’s eat outside and have some more chops—lots of them and undercooked—bloody ones with gristle.’

Now a December evening in Northern India is bitterly cold, and Fleete’s suggestion was that of a maniac.

Now, a December evening in Northern India is freezing cold, and Fleete's suggestion sounded insane.

‘Come in,’ said Strickland sternly. ‘Come in at once.’

‘Come in,’ Strickland said firmly. ‘Come in right now.’

Fleete came, and when the lamps were brought, we saw that he was literally plastered with dirt from head to foot. He must have been rolling in the garden. He shrank from the light and went to his room. His eyes were horrible to look at. There was a green light behind them, not in them, if you understand, and the man’s lower lip hung down.

Fleete arrived, and when the lamps were lit, we saw he was completely covered in dirt from head to toe. He must have been rolling in the garden. He flinched from the light and went to his room. His eyes were terrible to look at. There was a green light behind them, not in them, if you know what I mean, and the man’s lower lip was hanging down.

Strickland said, ‘There is going to be trouble-big trouble-to-night. Don’t you change your riding-things.’

Strickland said, "There’s going to be trouble—big trouble—tonight. Don’t change your riding, okay?"

We waited and waited for Fleete’s reappearance, and ordered dinner in the meantime. We could hear him moving about his own room, but there was no light there. Presently from the room came the long-drawn howl of a wolf.

We waited and waited for Fleete to come back, and in the meantime, we ordered dinner. We could hear him moving around in his room, but there was no light on. Soon, we heard a long, drawn-out howl like that of a wolf coming from his room.

People write and talk lightly of blood running cold and hair standing up and things of that kind. Both sensations are too horrible to be trifled with. My heart stopped as though a knife had been driven through it, and Strickland turned as white as the tablecloth.

People casually talk about blood running cold and hair standing on end, but those feelings are too intense to joke about. My heart felt like it had stopped, as if a knife had pierced it, and Strickland went as pale as the tablecloth.

The howl was repeated, and was answered by another howl far across the fields.

The howl repeated, and was answered by another howl from far across the fields.

That set the gilded roof on the horror. Strickland dashed into Fleete’s room. I followed, and we saw Fleete getting out of the window. He made beast-noises in the back of his throat. He could not answer us when we shouted at him. He spat.

That topped off the horror. Strickland rushed into Fleete’s room. I followed, and we saw Fleete trying to climb out of the window. He made growling noises in the back of his throat. He couldn’t respond when we yelled at him. He spat.

I don’t quite remember what followed, but I think that Strickland must have stunned him with the long boot-jack or else I should never have been able to sit on his chest. Fleete could not speak, he could only snarl, and his snarls were those of a wolf, not of a man. The human spirit must have been giving way all day and have died out with the twilight. We were dealing with a beast that had once been Fleete.

I don’t really remember what happened next, but I think Strickland must have knocked him out with the long boot-jack, or I wouldn’t have been able to sit on his chest. Fleete couldn’t talk; he could only snarl, and his snarls were more like a wolf’s than a human’s. The human spirit must have been fading all day and completely gone by twilight. We were facing a creature that had once been Fleete.

The affair was beyond any human and rational experience. I tried to say ‘Hydrophobia,’ but the word wouldn’t come, because I knew that I was lying.

The situation was beyond any human understanding. I tried to say 'Hydrophobia,' but the word wouldn’t come out, because I knew I was lying.

We bound this beast with leather thongs of the punkah-rope, and tied its thumbs and big toes together, and gagged it with a shoe-horn, which makes a very efficient gag if you know how to arrange it. Then we carried it into the dining-room, and sent a man to Dumoise, the doctor, telling him to come over at once. After we had despatched the messenger and were drawing breath, Strickland said, ‘It’s no good. This isn’t any doctor’s work.’ I, also, knew that he spoke the truth.

We tied up this monster with leather straps from the punkah-rope, and secured its thumbs and big toes together, gagging it with a shoehorn, which works really well if you know how to set it up. Then we brought it into the dining room and sent a guy to Dumoise, the doctor, telling him to come over right away. After we sent the messenger and took a moment to catch our breath, Strickland said, ‘This isn’t going to work. This isn’t something for a doctor.’ I also knew he was right.

The beast’s head was free, and it threw it about from side to side. Any one entering the room would have believed that we were curing a wolf’s pelt. That was the most loathsome accessory of all.

The beast's head was loose, and it tossed it back and forth. Anyone walking into the room would think we were working on a wolf's fur. That was the most disgusting part of all.

Strickland sat with his chin in the heel of his fist, watching the beast as it wriggled on the ground, but saying nothing. The shirt had been torn open in the scuffle and showed the black rosette mark on the left breast. It stood out like a blister.

Strickland sat with his chin resting in his fist, watching the creature as it squirmed on the ground, but he didn’t say a word. The shirt had been torn open during the struggle and revealed the black rosette mark on the left side of his chest. It stood out like a blister.

In the silence of the watching we heard something without mewing like a she-otter. We both rose to our feet, and, I answer for myself, not Strickland, felt sick—actually and physically sick. We told each other, as did the men in Pinafore, that it was the cat.

In the quiet of our observation, we heard something that wasn't the sound of a cat, like a female otter. We both stood up, and I can only speak for myself—Strickland didn't seem affected—but I felt nauseous, really and physically nauseous. We told each other, just like the men in Pinafore, that it was the cat.

Dumoise arrived, and I never saw a little man so unprofessionally shocked. He said that it was a heart-rending case of hydrophobia, and that nothing could be done. At least any palliative measures would only prolong the agony. The beast was foaming at the mouth. Fleete, as we told Dumoise, had been bitten by dogs once or twice. Any man who keeps half a dozen terriers must expect a nip now and again. Dumoise could offer no help. He could only certify that Fleete was dying of hydrophobia. The beast was then howling, for it had managed to spit out the shoe-horn. Dumoise said that he would be ready to certify to the cause of death, and that the end was certain. He was a good little man, and he offered to remain with us; but Strickland refused the kindness. He did not wish to poison Dumoise’s New Year. He would only ask him not to give the real cause of Fleete’s death to the public.

Dumoise showed up, and I’ve never seen a little guy so unprofessionally shocked. He said it was a heartbreaking case of rabies, and that nothing could be done. Any palliative care would just prolong the suffering. The animal was foaming at the mouth. Fleete, as we told Dumoise, had been bitten by dogs a few times. Anyone who has half a dozen terriers can expect a nip every now and then. Dumoise couldn’t help. He could only confirm that Fleete was dying from rabies. The animal was howling because it had managed to spit out the shoehorn. Dumoise said he would be ready to certify the cause of death, and that the end was inevitable. He was a good little man and offered to stay with us, but Strickland turned down the offer. He didn’t want to ruin Dumoise’s New Year. He just asked him not to reveal the real cause of Fleete’s death to the public.

So Dumoise left, deeply agitated; and as soon as the noise of the cart-wheels had died away, Strickland told me, in a whisper, his suspicions. They were so wildly improbable that he dared not say them out aloud; and I, who entertained all Strickland’s beliefs, was so ashamed of owning to them that I pretended to disbelieve.

So Dumoise left, really shaken up; and as soon as the sound of the cart wheels faded away, Strickland told me, quietly, about his suspicions. They were so crazy that he didn't want to say them out loud; and I, who believed everything Strickland believed, was so embarrassed to admit it that I acted like I didn't believe him.

‘Even if the Silver Man had bewtiched Fleete for polluting the image of Hanuman, the punishment could not have fallen so quickly.’

‘Even if the Silver Man had cursed Fleete for disrespecting the image of Hanuman, the punishment couldn't have come so fast.’

As I was whispering this the cry outside the house rose again, and the beast fell into a fresh paroxysm of struggling till we were afraid that the thongs that held it would give way.

As I whispered this, the screams outside the house grew louder, and the beast began struggling again, making us worried that the thongs holding it would break.

‘Watch!’ said Strickland. ‘If this happens six times I shall take the law into my own hands. I order you to help me.’

‘Watch!’ said Strickland. ‘If this happens six times, I’ll take matters into my own hands. I need you to help me.’

He went into his room and came out in a few minutes with the barrels of an old shot-gun, a piece of fishing-line, some thick cord, and his heavy wooden bedstead. I reported that the convulsions had followed the cry by two seconds in each case, and the beast seemed perceptibly weaker.

He went into his room and came out a few minutes later with the barrels of an old shotgun, a length of fishing line, some thick rope, and his heavy wooden bed frame. I reported that the convulsions followed the cry by two seconds each time, and the creature seemed noticeably weaker.

Strickland muttered, ‘But he can’t take away the life! He can’t take away the life!’

Strickland muttered, ‘But he can’t take away life! He can’t take away life!’

I said, though I knew that I was arguing against myself, ‘It may be a cat. It must be a cat. If the Silver Man is responsible, why does he dare to come here?’

I said, even though I realized I was contradicting myself, ‘It could be a cat. It has to be a cat. If the Silver Man is to blame, why would he come here?’

Strickland arranged the wood on the hearth, put the gun-barrels into the glow of the fire, spread the twine on the table and broke a walking stick in two. There was one yard of fishing line, gut, lapped with wire, such as is used for mahseer-fishing, and he tied the two ends together in a loop.

Strickland set up the wood on the hearth, placed the gun-barrels into the fire's glow, spread the twine across the table, and snapped a walking stick in half. There was a yard of fishing line, gut, wrapped with wire, like what’s used for mahseer fishing, and he tied the two ends together to make a loop.

Then he said, ‘How can we catch him? He must be taken alive and unhurt.’

Then he said, ‘How can we catch him? He has to be taken alive and unharmed.’

I said that we must trust in Providence, and go out softly with polo-sticks into the shrubbery at the front of the house. The man or animal that made the cry was evidently moving round the house as regularly as a night-watchman. We could wait in the bushes till he came by and knock him over.

I said we need to trust in fate and sneak out with our polo sticks into the bushes in front of the house. The person or animal making the noise was clearly moving around the house like a night watchman. We could hide in the bushes until he walked by and take him down.

Strickland accepted this suggestion, and we slipped out from a bath-room window into the front verandah and then across the carriage drive into the bushes.

Strickland agreed to this suggestion, and we climbed out through a bathroom window onto the front porch and then across the driveway into the bushes.

In the moonlight we could see the leper coming round the corner of the house. He was perfectly naked, and from time to time he mewed and stopped to dance with his shadow. It was an unattractive sight, and thinking of poor Fleete, brought to such degradation by so foul a creature, I put away all my doubts and resolved to help Strickland from the heated gun-barrels to the loop of twine-from the loins to the head and back again—-with all tortures that might be needful.

In the moonlight, we could see the leper coming around the corner of the house. He was completely naked, and occasionally he meowed and paused to dance with his shadow. It was a disturbing sight, and thinking of poor Fleete, brought so low by such a disgusting creature, I set aside all my doubts and decided to help Strickland from the hot gun barrels to the loop of twine—from the waist to the head and back again—with whatever tortures might be necessary.

The leper halted in the front porch for a moment and we jumped out on him with the sticks. He was wonderfully strong, and we were afraid that he might escape or be fatally injured before we caught him. We had an idea that lepers were frail creatures, but this proved to be incorrect. Strickland knocked his legs from under him and I put my foot on his neck. He mewed hideously, and even through my riding-boots I could feel that his flesh was not the flesh of a clean man.

The leper stopped on the front porch for a moment, and we jumped out at him with our sticks. He was incredibly strong, and we were worried he might escape or get seriously hurt before we caught him. We thought lepers were weak, but that turned out to be wrong. Strickland knocked his legs out from under him, and I put my foot on his neck. He let out a horrible sound, and even through my riding boots, I could tell that his skin was not like that of a healthy person.

He struck at us with his hand and feet-stumps. We looped the lash of a dog-whip round him, under the armpits, and dragged him backwards into the hall and so into the dining-room where the beast lay. There we tied him with trunk-straps. He made no attempt to escape, but mewed.

He hit us with his hands and feet. We wrapped the handle of a dog whip around him, under his arms, and pulled him backwards into the hallway and then into the dining room where the animal was. There we tied him up with trunk straps. He didn't try to get away, but just cried out.

When we confronted him with the beast the scene was beyond description. The beast doubled backwards into a bow as though he had been poisoned with strychnine, and moaned in the most pitiable fashion. Several other things happened also, but they cannot be put down here.

When we faced him with the creature, the scene was indescribable. The creature recoiled into a bow as if it had been poisoned with strychnine, and moaned in the most pitiful way. Several other things happened too, but they can’t be mentioned here.

‘I think I was right,’ said Strickland. ‘Now we will ask him to cure this case.’

‘I think I was right,’ said Strickland. ‘Now we’ll ask him to fix this situation.’

But the leper only mewed. Strickland wrapped a towel round his hand and took the gun-barrels out of the fire. I put the half of the broken walking stick through the loop of fishing-line and buckled the leper comfortably to Strickland’s bedstead. I understood then how men and women and little children can endure to see a witch burnt alive; for the beast was moaning on the floor, and though the Silver Man had no face, you could see horrible feelings passing through the slab that took its place, exactly as waves of heat play across red-hot iron—gun-barrels for instance.

But the leper just whined. Strickland wrapped a towel around his hand and took the gun barrels out of the fire. I put the half of the broken walking stick through the loop of fishing line and secured the leper comfortably to Strickland’s bed. In that moment, I realized how men, women, and little children can stand to see a witch burned alive; because the creature was groaning on the floor, and even though the Silver Man had no face, you could see awful emotions flickering across the slab that took its place, just like waves of heat ripple across red-hot iron—like gun barrels, for example.

Strickland shaded his eyes with his hands for a moment and we got to work. This part is not to be printed.

Strickland shielded his eyes with his hands for a moment, and we got to work. This part is not to be printed.

The dawn was beginning to break when the leper spoke. His mewings had not been satisfactory up to that point. The beast had fainted from exhaustion and the house was very still. We unstrapped the leper and told him to take away the evil spirit. He crawled to the beast and laid his hand upon the left breast. That was all. Then he fell face down and whined, drawing in his breath as he did so.

The dawn was starting to break when the leper spoke. His cries hadn’t been good enough up to that point. The animal had passed out from exhaustion, and the house was very quiet. We unstrapped the leper and told him to get rid of the evil spirit. He crawled over to the animal and placed his hand on its left side. That was it. Then he collapsed face down and whimpered, gasping for breath as he did so.

We watched the face of the beast, and saw the soul of Fleete coming back into the eyes. Then a sweat broke out on the forehead and the eyes-they were human eyes—-closed. We waited for an hour but Fleete still slept. We carried him to his room and bade the leper go, giving him the bedstead, and the sheet on the bedstead to cover his nakedness, the gloves and the towels with which we had touched him, and the whip that had been hooked round his body. He put the sheet about him and went out into the early morning without speaking or mewing.

We watched the beast's face and saw Fleete's soul returning to his eyes. Then sweat broke out on his forehead, and the eyes—they were human eyes—closed. We waited for an hour, but Fleete still slept. We took him to his room and told the leper to leave, giving him the bed frame, the sheet to cover himself, the gloves and towels we had used to touch him, and the whip that had been wrapped around him. He wrapped the sheet around himself and stepped out into the early morning without saying a word.

Strickland wiped his face and sat down. A night-gong, far away in the city, made seven o’clock.

Strickland wiped his face and sat down. A distant night bell in the city chimed seven o'clock.

‘Exactly four-and-twenty hours!’ said Strickland. ‘And I’ve done enough to ensure my dismissal from the service, besides permanent quarters in a lunatic asylum. Do you believe that we are awake?’

‘Exactly twenty-four hours!’ said Strickland. ‘And I’ve done enough to make sure I’ll get kicked out of the service, plus a permanent spot in a mental asylum. Do you think we’re awake?’

The red-hot gun-barrel had fallen on the floor and was singeing the carpet. The smell was entirely real.

The red-hot gun barrel had dropped to the floor and was burning the carpet. The smell was very real.

That morning at eleven we two together went to wake up Fleete. We looked and saw that the black leopard-rosette on his chest had disappeared. He was very drowsy and tired, but as soon as he saw us, he said, ‘Oh! Confound you fellows. Happy New Year to you. Never mix your liquors. I’m nearly dead.’

That morning at eleven, we both went to wake up Fleete. We looked and noticed that the black leopard-rosette on his chest was gone. He was really drowsy and tired, but as soon as he saw us, he said, ‘Oh! Damn you guys. Happy New Year! Never mix your drinks. I feel like I’m almost dead.’

‘Thanks for your kindness, but you’re over time,’ said Strickland. ‘To-day is the morning of the second. You’ve slept the clock round with a vengeance.’

‘Thanks for your kindness, but you're out of time,’ said Strickland. ‘Today is the morning of the second. You've slept through the entire day like there's no tomorrow.’

The door opened, and little Dumoise put his head in. He had come on foot, and fancied that we were laving out Fleete.

The door opened, and little Dumoise stuck his head in. He had walked here and thought that we were hanging out at Fleete.

‘I’ve brought a nurse,’ said Dumoise. ‘I suppose that she can come in for... what is necessary.’

‘I’ve brought a nurse,’ said Dumoise. ‘I guess she can come in for... what’s needed.’

‘By all means,’ said Fleete cheerily, sitting up in bed. ‘Bring on your nurses.’

"Sure thing," said Fleete cheerfully, sitting up in bed. "Bring on your nurses."

Dumoise was dumb. Strickland led him out and explained that there must have been a mistake in the diagnosis. Dumoise remained dumb and left the house hastily. He considered that his professional reputation had been injured, and was inclined to make a personal matter of the recovery. Strickland went out too. When he came back, he said that he had been to call on the Temple of Hanuman to offer redress for the pollution of the god, and had been solemnly assured that no white man had ever touched the idol and that he was an incarnation of all the virtues labouring under a delusion.

Dumoise was clueless. Strickland took him outside and explained that there must have been a mistake with the diagnosis. Dumoise stayed clueless and left the house in a hurry. He felt that his professional reputation had taken a hit and was determined to take the recovery personally. Strickland also stepped out. When he returned, he said that he had gone to visit the Temple of Hanuman to seek forgiveness for the desecration of the god, and was told with great seriousness that no white man had ever touched the idol and that he was a representation of all virtues misunderstood.

‘What do you think?’ said Strickland.

‘What do you think?’ Strickland asked.

I said, ‘“There are more things . . .”’

I said, "There are more things..."

But Strickland hates that quotation. He says that I have worn it threadbare.

But Strickland hates that quote. He says I’ve worn it out.

One other curious thing happened which frightened me as much as anything in all the night’s work. When Fleete was dressed he came into the dining-room and sniffed. He had a quaint trick of moving his nose when he sniffed. ‘Horrid doggy smell, here,’ said he. ‘You should really keep those terriers of yours in better order. Try sulphur, Strick.’

One other strange thing happened that scared me just as much as anything else that night. When Fleete got dressed, he walked into the dining room and sniffed. He had this funny way of twitching his nose when he sniffed. "Awful dog smell in here," he said. "You really should take better care of those terriers of yours. Try using sulfur, Strick."

But Strickland did not answer. He caught hold of the back of a chair, and, without warning, went into an amazing fit of hysterics. It is terrible to see a strong man overtaken with hysteria. Then it struck me that we had fought for Fleete’s soul with the Silver Man in that room, and had disgraced ourselves as Englishmen for ever, and I laughed and gasped and gurgled just as shamefully as Strickland, while Fleete thought that we had both gone mad. We never told him what we had done.

But Strickland didn't respond. He grabbed the back of a chair and, without any warning, burst into an incredible fit of hysterics. It's awful to see a strong man overwhelmed with hysteria. Then it hit me that we had fought for Fleete’s soul with the Silver Man in that room and had forever shamed ourselves as Englishmen, and I laughed and gasped and choked just as shamefully as Strickland, while Fleete thought we had both lost our minds. We never told him what we had done.

Some years later, when Strickland had married and was a church-going member of society for his wife’s sake, we reviewed the incident dispassionately, and Strickland suggested that I should put it before the public.

Some years later, when Strickland was married and attending church to please his wife, we looked back on the incident without emotion, and Strickland proposed that I share it with the public.

I cannot myself see that this step is likely to clear up the mystery; because, in the first place, no one will believe a rather unpleasant story, and, in the second, it is well known to every right-minded man that the gods of the heathen are stone and brass, and any attempt to deal with them otherwise is justly condemned.

I honestly don’t think this step will solve the mystery; first, because no one will believe an unpleasant story, and second, it’s common knowledge that the gods of the pagans are just stone and metal, and trying to interact with them differently is rightly criticized.





THE RETURN OF IMRAY

 The doors were wide, the story saith,
 Out of the night came the patient wraith,
 He might not speak, and he could not stir
 A hair of the Baron’s minniver—
 Speechless and strengthless, a shadow thin,
 He roved the castle to seek his kin.
 And oh, ’twas a piteous thing to see
 The dumb ghost follow his enemy!
                             THE BARON.
The doors were wide, the story says,  
Out of the night came the quiet ghost,  
He couldn't speak, and he couldn't move  
A hair of the Baron's fur—  
Speechless and powerless, a thin shadow,  
He wandered the castle to find his family.  
And oh, it was a sad thing to see  
The silent ghost following his enemy!  
                             THE BARON.

Imray achieved the impossible. Without warning, for no conceivable motive, in his youth, at the threshold of his career he chose to disappear from the world—-which is to say, the little Indian station where he lived.

Imray did the unthinkable. Out of nowhere, for no clear reason, in his youth, just as his career was about to kick off, he decided to vanish from the world—which means, the small Indian station where he lived.

Upon a day he was alive, well, happy, and in great evidence among the billiard-tables at his Club. Upon a morning, he was not, and no manner of search could make sure where he might be. He had stepped out of his place; he had not appeared at his office at the proper time, and his dogcart was not upon the public roads. For these reasons, and because he was hampering, in a microscopical degree, the administration of the Indian Empire, that Empire paused for one microscopical moment to make inquiry into the fate of Imray. Ponds were dragged, wells were plumbed, telegrams were despatched down the lines of railways and to the nearest seaport town-twelve hundred miles away; but Imray was not at the end of the drag-ropes nor the telegraph wires. He was gone, and his place knew him no more.

One day, he was alive, well, happy, and thriving among the billiard tables at his club. The next morning, he was missing, and no amount of searching could determine where he might be. He had stepped out of his routine; he hadn’t shown up at his office on time, and his dog cart was absent from the main roads. For these reasons, and because he was slightly impacting the administration of the Indian Empire, that Empire briefly paused to investigate what had happened to Imray. Ponds were searched, wells were checked, and telegrams were sent along the railway lines and to the nearest seaport town twelve hundred miles away; but Imray was not found at the ends of the search ropes or telegraph wires. He was gone, and his absence was felt.

Then the work of the great Indian Empire swept forward, because it could not be delayed, and Imray from being a man became a mystery—such a thing as men talk over at their tables in the Club for a month, and then forget utterly. His guns, horses, and carts were sold to the highest bidder. His superior officer wrote an altogether absurd letter to his mother, saying that Imray had unaccountably disappeared, and his bungalow stood empty.

Then the work of the great Indian Empire progressed rapidly, as it couldn't be postponed, and Imray transformed from being a man into a mystery—something that people discuss at their Club for a month and then completely forget. His guns, horses, and carts were auctioned off to the highest bidder. His superior officer sent a completely ridiculous letter to his mother, saying that Imray had inexplicably vanished, and his bungalow was left vacant.

After three or four months of the scorching hot weather had gone by, my friend Strickland, of the Police, saw fit to rent the bungalow from the native landlord. This was before he was engaged to Miss Youghal—an affair which has been described in another place—and while he was pursuing his investigations into native life. His own life was sufficiently peculiar, and men complained of his manners and customs. There was always food in his house, but there were no regular times for meals. He ate, standing up and walking about, whatever he might find at the sideboard, and this is not good for human beings. His domestic equipment was limited to six rifles, three shot-guns, five saddles, and a collection of stiff-jointed mahseer-rods, bigger and stronger than the largest salmon-rods. These occupied one-half of his bungalow, and the other half was given up to Strickland and his dog Tietjens—an enormous Rampur slut who devoured daily the rations of two men. She spoke to Strickland in a language of her own; and whenever, walking abroad, she saw things calculated to destroy the peace of Her Majesty the Queen-Empress, she returned to her master and laid information. Strickland would take steps at once, and the end of his labours was trouble and fine and imprisonment for other people. The natives believed that Tietjens was a familiar spirit, and treated her with the great reverence that is born of hate and fear. One room in the bungalow was set apart for her special use. She owned a bedstead, a blanket, and a drinking-trough, and if any one came into Strickland’s room at night her custom was to knock down the invader and give tongue till some one came with a light. Strickland owed his life to her, when he was on the Frontier, in search of a local murderer, who came in the gray dawn to send Strickland much farther than the Andaman Islands. Tietjens caught the man as he was crawling into Strickland’s tent with a dagger between his teeth; and after his record of iniquity was established in the eyes of the law he was hanged. From that date Tietjens wore a collar of rough silver, and employed a monogram on her night-blanket; and the blanket was of double woven Kashmir cloth, for she was a delicate dog.

After three or four months of scorching weather had passed, my friend Strickland from the Police decided to rent the bungalow from the local landlord. This was before he got engaged to Miss Youghal—an event mentioned elsewhere—and while he was investigating local life. His own life was quite unusual, and people often complained about his habits and manners. His house always had food, but there were no set meal times. He ate standing up and walking around, grabbing whatever he found on the sideboard, which isn’t healthy for anyone. His household items included six rifles, three shotguns, five saddles, and a collection of stiff-jointed mahseer rods, which were larger and stronger than the biggest salmon rods. These took up half of his bungalow, while the other half was for Strickland and his dog Tietjens—an enormous Rampur bitch who devoured the daily rations of two men. She communicated with Strickland in her own way; and whenever they were out and she spotted something that could disturb the peace of Her Majesty the Queen-Empress, she would return to Strickland and report it. Strickland would take immediate action, resulting in trouble, fines, and imprisonment for others. The locals believed Tietjens was a familiar spirit and treated her with a mix of respect born from fear and hatred. One room in the bungalow was reserved just for her. She had a bed, a blanket, and a water trough, and if anyone entered Strickland's room at night, she would knock them down and bark until someone arrived with a light. Strickland owed his life to her when he was on the Frontier, searching for a local murderer, who came in the gray dawn to send Strickland far beyond the Andaman Islands. Tietjens caught the man as he was creeping into Strickland’s tent with a dagger in his teeth; and after his crimes were established in the eyes of the law, he was hanged. From that day on, Tietjens wore a rough silver collar and had a monogram on her night blanket, which was made of double-woven Kashmir cloth because she was a delicate dog.

Under no circumstances would she be separated from Strickland; and once, when he was ill with fever, made great trouble for the doctors, because she did not know how to help her master and would not allow another creature to attempt aid. Macarnaght, of the Indian Medical Service, beat her over her head with a gun-butt before she could understand that she must give room for those who could give quinine.

Under no circumstances would she leave Strickland; and once, when he was suffering from a fever, she caused a lot of trouble for the doctors because she didn’t know how to help her master and wouldn’t let anyone else try to assist. Macarnaght, from the Indian Medical Service, struck her over the head with a gun-butt before she could realize that she needed to make way for those who could provide quinine.

A short time after Strickland had taken Imray’s bungalow, my business took me through that Station, and naturally, the Club quarters being full, I quartered myself upon Strickland. It was a desirable bungalow, eight-roomed and heavily thatched against any chance of leakage from rain. Under the pitch of the roof ran a ceiling-cloth which looked just as neat as a white-washed ceiling. The landlord had repainted it when Strickland took the bungalow. Unless you knew how Indian bungalows were built you would never have suspected that above the cloth lay the dark three-cornered cavern of the roof, where the beams and the underside of the thatch harboured all manner of rats, bats, ants, and foul things.

A little while after Strickland moved into Imray’s bungalow, I had to go through that Station for work, and since the Club quarters were fully booked, I stayed at Strickland’s place. It was a nice bungalow with eight rooms, heavily thatched to prevent any leaks from the rain. Under the roof was a ceiling cloth that looked just as tidy as a white-washed ceiling. The landlord had repainted it when Strickland moved in. Unless you knew how Indian bungalows were constructed, you’d never guess that above the cloth was the dark, triangular space of the roof, where beams and the underside of the thatch were home to all sorts of rats, bats, ants, and other nasty things.

Tietjens met me in the verandah with a bay like the boom of the bell of St. Paul’s, putting her paws on my shoulder to show she was glad to see me. Strickland had contrived to claw together a sort of meal which he called lunch, and immediately after it was finished went out about his business. I was left alone with Tietjens and my own affairs. The heat of the summer had broken up and turned to the warm damp of the rains. There was no motion in the heated air, but the rain fell like ramrods on the earth, and flung up a blue mist when it splashed back. The bamboos, and the custard-apples, the poinsettias, and the mango-trees in the garden stood still while the warm water lashed through them, and the frogs began to sing among the aloe hedges. A little before the light failed, and when the rain was at its worst, I sat in the back verandah and heard the water roar from the eaves, and scratched myself because I was covered with the thing called prickly-heat. Tietjens came out with me and put her head in my lap and was very sorrowful; so I gave her biscuits when tea was ready, and I took tea in the back verandah on account of the little coolness found there. The rooms of the house were dark behind me. I could smell Strickland’s saddlery and the oil on his guns, and I had no desire to sit among these things. My own servant came to me in the twilight, the muslin of his clothes clinging tightly to his drenched body, and told me that a gentleman had called and wished to see some one. Very much against my will, but only because of the darkness of the rooms, I went into the naked drawing-room, telling my man to bring the lights. There might or might not have been a caller waiting—-it seemed to me that I saw a figure by one of the windows—-but when the lights came there was nothing save the spikes of the rain without, and the smell of the drinking earth in my nostrils. I explained to my servant that he was no wiser than he ought to be, and went back to the verandah to talk to Tietjens. She had gone out into the wet, and I could hardly coax her back to me; even with biscuits with sugar tops. Strickland came home, dripping wet, just before dinner, and the first thing he said was.

Tietjens greeted me on the porch with a bark that sounded like the bell of St. Paul's, putting her paws on my shoulder to show she was happy to see me. Strickland had managed to throw together a meal he called lunch, and as soon as we finished, he went off to take care of his business. I was left alone with Tietjens and my own thoughts. The summer heat had faded, giving way to the warm, damp days of the rainy season. The air was still, but the rain fell heavily on the ground, creating a blue mist as it splashed up. The bamboos, custard apples, poinsettias, and mango trees in the garden stood still while the warm water poured over them, and the frogs began to croak among the aloe hedges. Just before darkness fell, when the rain was heaviest, I sat on the back porch listening to the water roaring from the roof, scratching myself because I was covered in prickly heat. Tietjens joined me, resting her head in my lap looking quite mournful, so I gave her some biscuits when tea was ready, and I opted to drink tea on the back porch to enjoy the slight coolness there. The rooms of the house behind me were dark. I could smell Strickland’s saddlery and the oil on his guns, and I had no interest in sitting around those things. My servant approached me in the twilight, his muslin clothes clinging to his soaked body, and told me that a gentleman had come to see someone. Reluctantly, mostly because of the darkness in the rooms, I went into the bare drawing-room, asking my servant to bring the lights. There might have been a visitor waiting— I thought I saw a figure by one of the windows— but when the lights came, there was nothing but the rain spikes outside, and the earthy smell filled my nostrils. I told my servant he was no wiser than necessary and returned to the porch to talk to Tietjens. She had ventured out into the rain, and I could barely coax her back, even with sugar-topped biscuits. Strickland came home, soaked to the skin, just before dinner, and the first thing he said was.

‘Has any one called?’

"Has anyone called?"

I explained, with apologies, that my servant had summoned me into the drawing-room on a false alarm; or that some loafer had tried to call on Strickland, and thinking better of it had fled after giving his name. Strickiand ordered dinner, without comment, and since it was a real dinner with a white tablecloth attached, we sat down.

I apologized and explained that my servant had called me into the living room for no good reason; or that some random guy had tried to visit Strickland but had changed his mind and left after giving his name. Strickland ordered dinner without saying anything, and since it was a proper dinner with a white tablecloth, we sat down.

At nine o’clock Strickland wanted to go to bed, and I was tired too. Tietjens, who had been lying underneath the table, rose up, and swung into the least exposed verandah as soon as her master moved to his own room, which was next to the stately chamber set apart for Tietjens. If a mere wife had wished to sleep out of doors in that pelting rain it would not have mattered; but Tietjens was a dog, and therefore the better animal. I looked at Strickland, expecting to see him flay her with a whip. He smiled queerly, as a man would smile after telling some unpleasant domestic tragedy. ‘She has done this ever since I moved in here,’ said he. ‘Let her go.’

At nine o'clock, Strickland wanted to go to bed, and I was tired too. Tietjens, who had been lying under the table, got up and moved to the least exposed porch as soon as her owner headed to his own room, which was next to the grand chamber reserved for Tietjens. If a regular wife wanted to sleep outside in that pouring rain, it wouldn’t have mattered; but Tietjens was a dog, and therefore the superior creature. I looked at Strickland, expecting to see him lash out at her with a whip. He smiled oddly, like someone who just shared an uncomfortable family story. "She’s been doing this ever since I moved in here," he said. "Let her go."

The dog was Strickland’s dog, so I said nothing, but I felt all that Strickland felt In being thus made light of. Tietjens encamped outside my bedroom window, and storm after storm came up, thundered on the thatch, and died away. The lightning spattered the sky as a thrown egg spatters a barn-door, but the light was pale blue, not yellow; and, looking through my split bamboo blinds, I could see the great dog standing, not sleeping, in the verandah, the hackles alift on her back and her feet anchored as tensely as the drawn wire-rope of a suspension bridge. In the very short pauses of the thunder I tried to sleep, but it seemed that some one wanted me very urgently. He, whoever he was, was trying to call me by name, but his voice was no more than a husky whisper. The thunder ceased, and Tietjens went into the garden and howled at the low moon. Somebody tried to open my door, walked about and about through the house and stood breathing heavily in the verandahs, and just when I was falling asleep I fancied that I heard a wild hammering and clamouring above my head or on the door.

The dog belonged to Strickland, so I didn’t say anything, but I felt everything Strickland felt as he was mocked like this. Tietjens camped outside my bedroom window, and storms rolled in one after another, crashing on the thatch and then fading away. The lightning lit up the sky like a thrown egg splattering against a barn door, but the light was pale blue, not yellow; and looking through my split bamboo blinds, I could see the big dog standing, not sleeping, on the verandah, her hackles raised and her feet tense like the taut cable of a suspension bridge. In the brief pauses of the thunder, I tried to sleep, but it felt like someone was urgently calling for me. Whoever it was was trying to say my name, but his voice was just a hoarse whisper. The thunder stopped, and Tietjens went into the garden and howled at the low moon. Someone tried to open my door, walked around the house, and stood breathing heavily on the verandahs, and just when I was about to fall asleep, I thought I heard wild hammering and clamoring above my head or at the door.

I ran into Strickland’s room and asked him whether he was ill, and had been calling for me. He was lying on his bed half dressed, a pipe in his mouth. ‘I thought you’d come,’ he said. ‘Have I been walking round the house recently?’

I rushed into Strickland’s room and asked him if he was sick and had been calling for me. He was lying on his bed half-dressed, with a pipe in his mouth. “I thought you’d show up,” he said. “Have I been wandering around the house lately?”

I explained that he had been tramping in the dining-room and the smoking-room and two or three other places, and he laughed and told me to go back to bed. I went back to bed and slept till the morning, but through all my mixed dreams I was sure I was doing some one an injustice in not attending to his wants. What those wants were I could not tell; but a fluttering, whispering, bolt-fumbling, lurking, loitering Someone was reproaching me for my slackness, and, half awake, I heard the howling of Tietjens in the garden and the threshing of the rain.

I explained that he had been wandering around the dining room, the smoking room, and a couple of other places, and he laughed, telling me to go back to bed. I returned to bed and slept until morning, but throughout my mixed dreams, I felt that I was neglecting someone's needs. I couldn't identify what those needs were, but a restless, whispering, anxious presence was making me feel guilty for being careless, and, half awake, I heard Tietjens howling in the garden and the pounding of the rain.

I lived in that house for two days. Strickland went to his office daily, leaving me alone for eight or ten hours with Tietjens for my only companion. As long as the full light lasted I was comfortable, and so was Tietjens; but in the twilight she and I moved into the back verandah and cuddled each other for company. We were alone in the house, but none the less it was much too fully occupied by a tenant with whom I did not wish to interfere. I never saw him, but I could see the curtains between the rooms quivering where he had just passed through; I could hear the chairs creaking as the bamboos sprung under a weight that had just quitted them; and I could feel when I went to get a book from the dining-room that somebody was waiting in the shadows of the front verandah till I should have gone away. Tietjens made the twilight more interesting by glaring into the darkened rooms with every hair erect, and following the motions of something that I could not see. She never entered the rooms, but her eyes moved interestedly: that was quite sufficient. Only when my servant came to trim the lamps and make all light and habitable she would come in with me and spend her time sitting on her haunches, watching an invisible extra man as he moved about behind my shoulder. Dogs are cheerful companions.

I lived in that house for two days. Strickland went to his office every day, leaving me alone for eight to ten hours with Tietjens as my only company. As long as it was still light out, I felt comfortable, and so did Tietjens; but in the twilight, she and I would move to the back porch and cuddle up for warmth. We were alone in the house, but it still felt too occupied by a tenant I didn’t want to disturb. I never saw him, but I could see the curtains between the rooms twitching where he had just passed through; I could hear the chairs creaking as the bamboos bent under the weight that had just left them; and I could sense that when I went to grab a book from the dining room, someone was waiting in the shadows of the front porch until I had moved away. Tietjens made the twilight more interesting by staring into the darkened rooms with her fur standing on end, tracking the movement of something I couldn’t see. She never went into the rooms, but her eyes moved with interest: that was enough. Only when my servant came to trim the lamps and brighten things up would she join me inside and sit on her haunches, watching an invisible extra man as he moved around behind my shoulder. Dogs are great companions.

I explained to Strickland, gently as might be, that I would go over to the Club and find for myself quarters there. I admired his hospitality, was pleased with his guns and rods, but I did not much care for his house and its atmosphere. He heard me out to the end, and then smiled very wearily, but without contempt, for he is a man who understands things. ‘Stay on,’ he said, ‘and see what this thing means. All you have talked about I have known since I took the bungalow. Stay on and wait. Tietjens has left me. Are you going too?’

I explained to Strickland, as gently as I could, that I would head over to the Club and find my own place there. I appreciated his hospitality and admired his guns and fishing gear, but I wasn't a fan of his house and the vibe it gave off. He listened to me until I finished, then smiled wearily, but without any bitterness, because he’s someone who gets it. "Stay here," he said, "and see what this is all about. Everything you’ve mentioned, I’ve known since I got the bungalow. Just stay and wait. Tietjens has left me. Are you leaving too?"

I had seen him through one little affair, connected with a heathen idol, that had brought me to the doors of a lunatic asylum, and I had no desire to help him through further experiences. He was a man to whom unpleasantnesses arrived as do dinners to ordinary people.

I had seen him through one little incident involving a pagan idol that had led me to the brink of a mental hospital, and I had no desire to help him through any more experiences like that. He was a guy who attracted trouble as easily as regular people attract dinner.

Therefore I explained more clearly than ever that I liked him immensely, and would be happy to see him in the daytime; but that I did not care to sleep under his roof. This was after dinner, when Tietjens had gone out to lie in the verandah.

Therefore, I made it clearer than ever that I liked him a lot, and I would be happy to see him during the day; but I didn’t want to sleep under his roof. This was after dinner when Tietjens had gone out to lie on the verandah.

‘’Pon my soul, I don’t wonder,’ said Strickland, with his eyes on the ceiling-cloth. ‘Look at that!’

“Honestly, I’m not surprised,” said Strickland, staring at the ceiling. “Just look at that!”

The tails of two brown snakes were hanging between the cloth and the cornice of the wall. They threw long shadows in the lamplight.

The tails of two brown snakes were dangling between the fabric and the top of the wall. They cast long shadows in the light from the lamp.

‘If you are afraid of snakes of course—’ said Strickland.

‘If you're afraid of snakes, of course—’ said Strickland.

I hate and fear snakes, because if you look into the eyes of any snake you will see that it knows all and more of the mystery of man’s fall, and that it feels all the contempt that the Devil felt when Adam was evicted from Eden. Besides which its bite is generally fatal, and it twists up trouser legs.

I hate and fear snakes because if you look into their eyes, you see they know all the mysteries of humanity's downfall. They hold the same contempt that the Devil felt when Adam was kicked out of Eden. Plus, their bite is usually deadly, and they can coil around your pant legs.

‘You ought to get your thatch overhauled,’ I said.

‘You should get your thatch fixed,’ I said.

‘Give me a mahseer-rod, and we’ll poke ‘em down.’

‘Give me a mahseer rod, and we’ll catch them.’

‘They’ll hide among the roof-beams,’ said Strickland. ‘I can’t stand snakes overhead. I’m going up into the roof. If I shake ‘em down, stand by with a cleaning-rod and break their backs.’

‘They’ll hide among the rafters,’ said Strickland. ‘I can’t stand snakes above me. I’m going up into the roof. If I shake them down, be ready with a cleaning rod to break their backs.’

I was not anxious to assist Strickland in his work, but I took the cleaning-rod and waited in the dining-room, while Strickland brought a gardener’s ladder from the verandah, and set it against the side of the room.

I wasn't keen on helping Strickland with his work, but I grabbed the cleaning rod and waited in the dining room while Strickland brought a gardener's ladder from the porch and leaned it against the side of the room.

The snake-tails drew themselves up and disappeared. We could hear the dry rushing scuttle of long bodies running over the baggy ceiling-cloth. Strickland took a lamp with him, while I tried to make clear to him the danger of hunting roof-snakes between a ceiling-cloth and a thatch, apart from the deterioration of property caused by ripping out ceiling-cloths.

The snake tails reared up and vanished. We could hear the dry rustling sound of long bodies moving across the loose ceiling fabric. Strickland took a lamp with him while I tried to explain to him the danger of hunting roof snakes between a ceiling cloth and thatch, aside from the damage to the property caused by tearing down ceiling cloths.

‘Nonsense!’ said Strickland. ‘They’re sure to hide near the walls by the cloth. The bricks are too cold for ‘em, and the heat of the room is just what they like.’ He put his hand to the corner of the stuff and ripped it from the cornice. It gave with a great sound of tearing, and Strickland put his head through the opening into the dark of the angle of the roof-beams. I set my teeth and lifted the rod, for I had not the least knowledge of what might descend.

‘Nonsense!’ said Strickland. ‘They’re definitely going to hide near the walls by the fabric. The bricks are too cold for them, and the warmth of the room is exactly what they enjoy.’ He reached for the edge of the material and tore it down from the cornice. It ripped with a loud noise, and Strickland poked his head through the gap into the shadows at the angle of the roof beams. I gritted my teeth and raised the rod, as I had no idea what might come down.

‘H’m!’ said Strickland, and his voice rolled and rumbled in the roof. ‘There’s room for another set of rooms up here, and, by Jove, some one is occupying ‘em!’

‘Hmm!’ said Strickland, his voice echoing in the ceiling. ‘There’s space for another set of rooms up here, and, wow, someone is using them!’

‘Snakes?’ I said from below.

"Snakes?" I called from below.

‘No. It’s a buffalo. Hand me up the two last joints of a mahseer-rod, and I’ll prod it. It’s lying on the main roof-beam.’

‘No. It’s a buffalo. Hand me the last two sections of a mahseer rod, and I’ll poke it. It’s lying on the main roof beam.’

I handed up the rod.

I handed over the rod.

‘What a nest for owls and serpents! No wonder the snakes live here,’ said Strickland, climbing farther into the roof. I could see his elbow thrusting with the rod. ‘Come out of that, whoever you are! Heads below there! It’s falling.’

‘What a home for owls and snakes! No wonder the snakes are living here,’ said Strickland, climbing further up into the roof. I could see his elbow pushing with the rod. ‘Come out of there, whoever you are! Heads down below! It’s coming down!’

I saw the ceiling-cloth nearly in the centre of the room bag with a shape that was pressing it downwards and downwards towards the lighted lamp on the table. I snatched the lamp out of danger and stood back. Then the cloth ripped out from the walls, tore, split, swayed, and shot down upon the table something that I dared not look at, till Strickland had slid down the ladder and was standing by my side.

I saw the fabric on the ceiling sagging in the middle of the room, shaped by something pushing it down toward the lamp on the table. I quickly grabbed the lamp to save it and stepped back. Then the fabric pulled away from the walls, ripped, swayed, and dropped something onto the table that I was too scared to look at until Strickland had come down the ladder and was standing next to me.

He did not say much, being a man of few words; but he picked up the loose end of the tablecloth and threw it over the remnants on the table.

He didn't say much, as he was a man of few words; but he picked up the loose end of the tablecloth and draped it over the leftovers on the table.

‘It strikes me,’ said he, putting down the lamp, ‘our friend Imray has come back. Oh! you would, would you?’

‘It hits me,’ he said, setting down the lamp, ‘our friend Imray is back. Oh! you would, would you?’

There was a movement under the cloth, and a little snake wriggled out, to be back-broken by the butt of the mahseer-rod. I was sufficiently sick to make no remarks worth recording.

There was a movement under the cloth, and a little snake wriggled out, to be crushed by the butt of the mahseer rod. I felt too sick to make any comments worth noting.

Strickland meditated, and helped himself to drinks. The arrangement under the cloth made no more signs of life.

Strickland thought deeply and poured himself some drinks. The arrangement under the cloth showed no more signs of life.

‘Is it Imray?’ I said.

"Is it Imray?" I asked.

Strickland turned back the cloth for a moment, and looked.

Strickland flipped back the cloth for a moment and glanced.

‘It is Imray,’ he said; ‘and his throat is cut from ear to ear.’

‘It’s Imray,’ he said; ‘and his throat is slit from ear to ear.’

Then we spoke, both together and to ourselves: ‘That’s why he whispered about the house.’

Then we talked, both to each other and to ourselves: ‘That’s why he whispered about the house.’

Tietjens, in the garden, began to bay furiously. A little later her great nose heaved open the dining-room door.

Tietjens, in the garden, started to bark loudly. A little later, her large nose pushed open the dining-room door.

She sniffed and was still. The tattered ceiling-cloth hung down almost to the level of the table, and there was hardly room to move away from the discovery.

She sniffed and stayed still. The worn-out ceiling cloth hung down almost to the level of the table, and there was barely enough room to step away from the discovery.

Tietjens came in and sat down; her teeth bared under her lip and her forepaws planted. She looked at Strickland.

Tietjens walked in and sat down; her teeth showed beneath her lip and her front paws were firmly planted. She looked at Strickland.

‘It’s a bad business, old lady,’ said he. ‘Men don’t climb up into the roofs of their bungalows to die, and they don’t fasten up the ceiling cloth behind ‘em. Let’s think it out.’

‘It’s a messed-up situation, old lady,’ he said. ‘Men don’t go up to the roofs of their bungalows to die, and they don’t secure the ceiling cloth behind them. Let’s figure this out.’

‘Let’s think it out somewhere else,’ I said.

‘Let’s figure this out somewhere else,’ I said.

‘Excellent idea! Turn the lamps out. We’ll get into my room.’

‘Great idea! Turn off the lamps. We’ll go to my room.’

I did not turn the lamps out. I went into Strickland’s room first, and allowed him to make the darkness. Then he followed me, and we lit tobacco and thought. Strickland thought. I smoked furiously, because I was afraid.

I didn’t turn off the lights. I went into Strickland’s room first and let him create the darkness. Then he followed me, and we lit up some tobacco and thought. Strickland was deep in thought. I smoked intensely because I was scared.

‘Imray is back,’ said Strickland. ‘The question is—-who killed Imray? Don’t talk, I’ve a notion of my own. When I took this bungalow I took over most of Imray’s servants. Imray was guileless and inoffensive, wasn’t he?’

‘Imray is back,’ Strickland said. ‘The question is—who killed Imray? Don’t say anything, I have my own theory. When I moved into this bungalow, I inherited most of Imray’s servants. Imray was innocent and harmless, wasn’t he?’

I agreed; though the heap under the cloth had looked neither one thing nor the other.

I agreed, even though the pile under the cloth didn’t look like anything specific.

‘If I call in all the servants they will stand fast in a crowd and lie like Aryans. What do you suggest?’

‘If I summon all the servants, they will stay together in a crowd and falsely report like Aryans. What do you think?’

‘Call ‘em in one by one,’ I said.

‘Call them in one by one,’ I said.

‘They’ll run away and give the news to all their fellows,’ said Strickland. ‘We must segregate ‘em. Do you suppose your servant knows anything about it?’

‘They’ll run away and spread the news to all their friends,’ said Strickland. ‘We need to separate them. Do you think your servant knows anything about it?’

‘He may, for aught I know; but I don’t think it’s likely. He has only been here two or three days,’ I answered. ‘What’s your notion?’

‘He might, for all I know; but I don’t think it's very likely. He’s only been here for two or three days,’ I replied. ‘What’s your idea?’

‘I can’t quite tell. How the dickens did the man get the wrong side of the ceiling-cloth?’

‘I can’t quite tell. How on earth did the guy get on the wrong side of the ceiling cloth?’

There was a heavy coughing outside Strickland’s bedroom door. This showed that Bahadur Khan, his body-servant, had waked from sleep and wished to put Strickland to bed.

There was a loud cough outside Strickland’s bedroom door. This indicated that Bahadur Khan, his servant, had woken up and wanted to help Strickland get to bed.

‘Come in,’ said Strickland. ‘It’s a very warm night, isn’t it?’

‘Come in,’ said Strickland. ‘It’s a really warm night, isn’t it?’

Bahadur Khan, a great, green-turbaned, six-foot Mahomedan, said that it was a very warm night; but that there was more rain pending, which, by his Honour’s favour, would bring relief to the country.

Bahadur Khan, a tall Muslim man wearing a green turban, said that it was a very warm night, but there was more rain on the way, which, with his Honor's favor, would bring relief to the country.

‘It will be so, if God pleases,’ said Strickland, tugging off his boots. ‘It is in my mind, Bahadur Khan, that I have worked thee remorselessly for many days—-ever since that time when thou first earnest into my service. What time was that?’

‘It will be so, if God wills it,’ said Strickland, pulling off his boots. ‘I’ve been thinking, Bahadur Khan, that I’ve worked you hard for many days—ever since the time you first came into my service. When was that?’

‘Has the Heaven-born forgotten? It was when Imray Sahib went secretly to Europe without warning given; and I-even I-came into the honoured service of the protector of the poor.’

‘Has the Heaven-born forgotten? It was when Imray Sahib went secretly to Europe without any notice; and I—even I—joined the esteemed service of the protector of the needy.’

‘And Imray Sahib went to Europe?’

‘And Imray Sahib went to Europe?’

‘It is so said among those who were his servants.’

‘People say this among those who served him.’

‘And thou wilt take service with him when he returns?’

‘Are you going to work for him when he comes back?’

‘Assuredly, Sahib. He was a good master, and cherished his dependants.’

'Of course, sir. He was a good boss and cared for his people.'

‘That is true. I am very tired, but I go buck-shooting to-morrow. Give me the little sharp rifle that I use for black-buck; it is in the case yonder.’

‘That’s true. I’m really tired, but I’m going buck shooting tomorrow. Hand me the small rifle I use for black buck; it’s in that case over there.’

The man stooped over the case; handed barrels, stock, and fore-end to Strickland, who fitted all together, yawning dolefully. Then he reached down to the gun-case, took a solid-drawn cartridge, and slipped it into the breech of the ‘360 Express.

The man bent over the case and handed the barrels, stock, and fore-end to Strickland, who put everything together while yawning unhappily. Then he reached down to the gun case, took a solid cartridge, and slid it into the breech of the ‘360 Express.

‘And Imray Sahib has gone to Europe secretly! That is very strange, Bahadur Khan, is it not?’

‘And Imray Sahib has secretly gone to Europe! That’s really strange, Bahadur Khan, don’t you think?’

‘What do I know of the ways of the white man. Heaven-born?’

‘What do I know about the ways of the white man? Heaven-born?’

‘Very little, truly. But thou shalt know more anon. It has reached me that Imray Sahib has returned from his so long journeyings, and that even now he lies in the next room, waiting his servant.’

‘Very little, really. But you’ll know more soon. I’ve heard that Imray Sahib has come back from his long travels, and right now he’s lying in the next room, waiting for his servant.’

‘Sahib!’

‘Sir!’

The lamplight slid along the barrels of the rifle as they levelled themselves at Bahadur Khan’s broad breast.

The lamplight glided over the rifle barrels as they aimed at Bahadur Khan’s broad chest.

‘Go and look!’ said Strickland. ‘Take a lamp. Thy master is tired, and he waits thee. Go!’

‘Go and check!’ said Strickland. ‘Take a lamp. Your master is tired, and he's waiting for you. Go!’

The man picked up a lamp, and went into the dining-room, Strickland following, and almost pushing him with the muzzle of the rifle. He looked for a moment at the black depths behind the ceiling-cloth; at the writhing snake under foot; and last, a gray glaze settling on his face, at the thing under the tablecloth.

The man picked up a lamp and walked into the dining room, with Strickland trailing closely behind and nearly nudging him with the rifle's muzzle. He glanced for a moment at the dark voids behind the ceiling cloth, at the writhing snake on the floor, and finally, with a gray expression settling on his face, at what was under the tablecloth.

‘Hast thou seen?’ said Strickland after a pause.

“Have you seen?” said Strickland after a pause.

‘I have seen. I am clay in the white man’s hands. What does the Presence do?’

‘I have seen. I am clay in the white man’s hands. What does the Presence do?’

‘Hang thee within the month. What else?’

‘Hang you within the month. What else?’

‘For killing him? Nay, Sahib, consider. Walking among us, his servants, he cast his eyes upon my child, who was four years old. Him he bewitched, and in ten days he died of the fever—my child!’

‘For killing him? No, sir, think about it. While he was among us, his servants, he looked at my four-year-old child. He enchanted him, and in ten days, my child died of the fever!’

‘What said Imray Sahib?’

"What did Imray Sahib say?"

‘He said he was a handsome child, and patted him on the head; wherefore my child died. Wherefore I killed Imray Sahib in the twilight, when he had come back from office, and was sleeping. Wherefore I dragged him up into the roof-beams and made all fast behind him. The Heaven-born knows all things. I am the servant of the Heaven-born.’

‘He said he was a good-looking kid and patted him on the head; that’s why my child died. That’s why I killed Imray Sahib in the evening when he had come back from work and was sleeping. That’s why I dragged him up into the beams of the roof and secured everything behind him. The Heaven-born knows everything. I am the servant of the Heaven-born.’

Strickland looked at me above the rifle, and said, in the vernacular, ‘Thou art witness to this saying? He has killed.’

Strickland looked at me over the rifle and said, in the common language, ‘You’re a witness to this? He’s killed.’

Bahadur Khan stood ashen gray in the light of the one lamp. The need for justification came upon him very swiftly. ‘I am trapped,’ he said, ‘but the offence was that man’s. He cast an evil eye upon my child, and I killed and hid him. Only such as are served by devils,’ he glared at Tietjens, couched stolidly before him, ‘only such could know what I did.’

Bahadur Khan stood pale in the light of the single lamp. The need for justification hit him suddenly. ‘I’m trapped,’ he said, ‘but the wrongdoing was that man’s. He put a curse on my child, and I killed him and buried him. Only those who are in league with devils,’ he glared at Tietjens, who sat stolidly in front of him, ‘only they could understand what I did.’

‘It was clever. But thou shouldst have lashed him to the beam with a rope. Now, thou thyself wilt hang by a rope. Orderly!’

‘It was clever. But you should have tied him to the beam with a rope. Now, you will hang by a rope yourself. Orderly!’

A drowsy policeman answered Strickland’s call. He was followed by another, and Tietjens sat wondrous still.

A sleepy cop answered Strickland’s call. He was followed by another, and Tietjens sat incredibly still.

‘Take him to the police-station,’ said Strickland. ‘There is a case toward.’

‘Take him to the police station,’ said Strickland. ‘There’s a case developing.’

‘Do I hang, then?’ said Bahadur Khan, making no attempt to escape, and keeping his eyes on the ground.

‘Am I being hanged, then?’ said Bahadur Khan, making no attempt to escape and staring at the ground.

‘If the sun shines or the water runs—yes!’ said Strickland.

‘If the sun is shining or the water is flowing—yes!’ said Strickland.

Bahadur Khan stepped back one long pace, quivered, and stood still. The two policemen waited further orders.

Bahadur Khan took a step back, trembled, and became still. The two police officers waited for further instructions.

‘Go!’ said Strickland.

"Go!" said Strickland.

‘Nay; but I go very swiftly,’ said Bahadur Khan. ‘Look! I am even now a dead man.’

‘No; but I'm moving very quickly,’ said Bahadur Khan. ‘Look! I'm already a dead man.’

He lifted his foot, and to the little toe there clung the head of the half-killed snake, firm fixed in the agony of death.

He lifted his foot, and the head of the half-dead snake clung to his little toe, firmly stuck in its dying agony.

‘I come of land-holding stock,’ said Bahadur Khan, rocking where he stood. ‘It were a disgrace to me to go to the public scaffold: therefore I take this way. Be it remembered that the Sahib’s shirts are correctly enumerated, and that there is an extra piece of soap in his washbasin. My child was bewitched, and I slew the wizard. Why should you seek to slay me with the rope? My honour is saved, and—and—I die.’

‘I come from a family that owns land,’ said Bahadur Khan, swaying slightly where he stood. ‘It would be a disgrace for me to go to the public gallows: so I'm choosing this route. Remember that the Sahib’s shirts are counted correctly, and there’s an extra bar of soap in his washbasin. My child was cursed, and I killed the sorcerer. Why would you try to kill me with a rope? My honor is intact, and—and—I’m dying.’

At the end of an hour he died, as they die who are bitten by the little brown karait, and the policemen bore him and the thing under the tablecloth to their appointed places. All were needed to make clear the disappearance of Imray.

At the end of an hour, he died, like those who are bitten by the little brown karait, and the police officers took him and the thing under the tablecloth to their designated locations. Everyone was necessary to clarify the disappearance of Imray.

‘This,’ said Strickland, very calmly, as he climbed into bed, ‘is called the nineteenth century. Did you hear what that man said?’

‘This,’ said Strickland, very calmly, as he climbed into bed, ‘is called the nineteenth century. Did you hear what that guy said?’

‘I heard,’ I answered. ‘Imray made a mistake.’

‘I heard,’ I said. ‘Imray messed up.’

‘Simply and solely through not knowing the nature of the Oriental, and the coincidence of a little seasonal fever. Bahadur Khan had been with him for four years.’

‘Simply and only because he didn’t understand the nature of the Oriental, and the timing of a little seasonal fever. Bahadur Khan had been with him for four years.’

I shuddered. My own servant had been with me for exactly that length of time. When I went over to my own room I found my man waiting, impassive as the copper head on a penny, to pull off my boots.

I shuddered. My own servant had been with me for exactly that long. When I went to my room, I found my guy waiting, as expressionless as the copper head on a penny, to take off my boots.

‘What has befallen Bahadur Khan?’ said I.

‘What happened to Bahadur Khan?’ I asked.

‘He was bitten by a snake and died. The rest the Sahib knows,’ was the answer.

‘He was bitten by a snake and died. The rest the boss knows,’ was the answer.

‘And how much of this matter hast thou known?’

‘And how much of this have you understood?’

‘As much as might be gathered from One coming in in the twilight to seek satisfaction. Gently, Sahib. Let me pull off those boots.’

‘As much as could be understood from someone arriving at dusk looking for satisfaction. Easy now, Sahib. Let me take off those boots.’

I had just settled to the sleep of exhaustion when I heard Strickland shouting from his side of the house—

I had just gotten comfortable enough to sleep from exhaustion when I heard Strickland yelling from his side of the house—

‘Tietjens has come back to her place!’

‘Tietjens has come back to her place!’

And so she had. The great deerhound was couched statelily on her own bedstead on her own blanket, while, in the next room, the idle, empty, ceiling-cloth waggled as it trailed on the table.

And so she did. The big deerhound was lying proudly on her own bed on her own blanket, while, in the next room, the unused, empty ceiling cloth fluttered as it hung over the table.





NAMGAY DOOLA

 There came to the beach a poor exile of Erin,
 The dew on his wet robe hung heavy and chill;
 Ere the steamer that brought him had passed out of hearin’,
 He was Alderman Mike inthrojuicin’ a bill!
                       AMERICAN SONG.
There came to the beach a poor exile from Ireland,  
The dew on his wet robe felt heavy and cold;  
Before the steamer that brought him was out of earshot,  
He was Alderman Mike introducing a bill!  
                       AMERICAN SONG.

Once upon a time there was a King who lived on the road to Thibet, very many miles in the Himalayas. His Kingdom was eleven thousand feet above the sea and exactly four miles square; but most of the miles stood on end owing to the nature of the country. His revenues were rather less than four hundred pounds yearly, and they were expended in the maintenance of one elephant and a standing army of five men. He was tributary to the Indian Government, who allowed him certain sums for keeping a section of the Himalaya-Thibet road in repair. He further increased his revenues by selling timber to the railway-companies; for he would cut the great deodar trees in his one forest, and they fell thundering into the Sutlej river and were swept down to the plains three hundred miles away and became railway-ties. Now and again this King, whose name does not matter, would mount a ringstraked horse and ride scores of miles to Simla-town to confer with the Lieutenant-Governor on matters of state, or to assure the Viceroy that his sword was at the service of the Queen-Empress. Then the Viceroy would cause a ruffle of drums to be sounded, and the ringstraked horse and the cavalry of the State—-two men in tatters—and the herald who bore the silver stick before the King would trot back to their own place, which lay between the tail of a heaven-climbing glacier and a dark birch-forest.

Once upon a time, there was a King who lived along the road to Tibet, many miles up in the Himalayas. His kingdom was eleven thousand feet above sea level and exactly four miles square, but most of those miles were vertical due to the terrain. His yearly revenue was a bit less than four hundred pounds, which he used to maintain one elephant and a standing army of five men. He was subordinate to the Indian Government, which paid him a certain amount for keeping a section of the Himalayan-Tibet road repaired. He also boosted his income by selling timber to the railway companies; he would cut down the massive deodar trees in his only forest, watching them crash into the Sutlej River, where they would be carried three hundred miles to the plains to be used as railway ties. Occasionally, this King, whose name isn’t important, would ride his striped horse for miles to Simla to meet with the Lieutenant-Governor about state affairs or to assure the Viceroy of his loyalty to the Queen-Empress. In response, the Viceroy would have drums sounded, and the striped horse, along with the State's cavalry—two ragged men—and the herald carrying the silver stick before the King would return to their home, nestled between the base of a towering glacier and a dark birch forest.

Now, from such a King, always remembering that he possessed one veritable elephant, and could count his descent for twelve hundred years, I expected, when it was my fate to wander through his dominions, no more than mere license to live.

Now, from a King like that, always keeping in mind that he had one genuine elephant and could trace his lineage back twelve hundred years, I expected, when I eventually traveled through his lands, nothing more than the simple permission to exist.

The night had closed in rain, and rolling clouds blotted out the lights of the villages in the valley. Forty miles away, untouched by cloud or storm, the white shoulder of Donga Pa—the Mountain of the Council of the Gods—upheld the Evening Star. The monkeys sang sorrowfully to each other as they hunted for dry roosts in the fern-wreathed trees, and the last puff of the day-wind brought from the unseen villages the scent of damp wood-smoke, hot cakes, dripping undergrowth, and rotting pine-cones. That is the true smell of the Himalayas, and if once it creeps into the blood of a man, that man will at the last, forgetting all else, return to the hills to die. The clouds closed and the smell went away, and there remained nothing in all the world except chilling white mist and the boom of the Sutlej river racing through the valley below. A fat-tailed sheep, who did not want to die, bleated piteously at my tent door. He was scuffling with the Prime Minister and the Director-General of Public Education, and he was a royal gift to me and my camp servants. I expressed my thanks suitably, and asked if I might have audience of the King. The Prime Minister readjusted his turban, which had fallen off in the struggle, and assured me that the King would be very pleased to see me. Therefore I despatched two bottles as a foretaste, and when the sheep had entered upon another incarnation went to the King’s Palace through the wet. He had sent his army to escort me, but the army stayed to talk with my cook. Soldiers are very much alike all the world over.

The night had set in with rain, and dark clouds hid the lights of the villages in the valley. Forty miles away, unaffected by cloud or storm, the white peak of Donga Pa—the Mountain of the Council of the Gods—held up the Evening Star. The monkeys sang sadly to each other as they searched for dry spots to rest in the fern-covered trees, and the last breath of the day’s wind brought the scent of damp wood smoke, warm cakes, wet underbrush, and decaying pine cones from the unseen villages. That is the true smell of the Himalayas, and once it gets into a person's blood, that person will ultimately, forgetting everything else, return to the hills to die. The clouds gathered and the smell faded, leaving nothing in the world except the chilling white mist and the roar of the Sutlej River rushing through the valley below. A fat-tailed sheep, who didn’t want to die, bleated pitifully at my tent door. He was struggling with the Prime Minister and the Director-General of Public Education, and he was a royal gift to me and my camp staff. I expressed my gratitude appropriately and asked if I could see the King. The Prime Minister adjusted his turban, which had fallen off during the struggle, and assured me that the King would be very happy to see me. So, I sent two bottles ahead as a little treat, and when the sheep had moved on to another life, I went to the King’s Palace through the rain. He had sent his army to escort me, but the soldiers stayed behind to chat with my cook. Soldiers are pretty much the same everywhere.

The Palace was a four-roomed and whitewashed mud and timber house, the finest in all the hills for a day’s journey. The King was dressed in a purple velvet jacket, white muslin trousers, and a saffron-yellow turban of price. He gave me audience in a little carpeted room opening off the palace courtyard which was occupied by the Elephant of State. The great beast was sheeted and anchored from trunk to tail, and the curve of his back stood out grandly against the mist.

The Palace was a four-room whitewashed mud and timber house, the best in all the hills for a day’s travel. The King wore a purple velvet jacket, white muslin trousers, and a saffron-yellow turban that was quite posh. He met with me in a small carpeted room that opened from the palace courtyard, which was home to the Elephant of State. The massive creature was covered with a sheet and secured from trunk to tail, and the curve of his back looked impressive against the mist.

The Prime Minister and the Director-General of Public Education were present to introduce me, but all the court had been dismissed, lest the two bottles aforesaid should corrupt their morals. The King cast a wreath of heavy-scented flowers round my neck as I bowed, and inquired how my honoured presence had the felicity to be. I said that through seeing his auspicious countenance the mists of the night had turned into sunshine, and that by reason of his beneficent sheep his good deeds would be remembered by the Gods. He said that since I had set my magnificent foot in his Kingdom the crops would probably yield seventy per cent more than the average. I said that the fame of the King had reached to the four corners of the earth, and that the nations gnashed their teeth when they heard daily of the glories of his realm and the wisdom of his moon-like Prime Minister and lotus-like Director-General of Public Education.

The Prime Minister and the Director-General of Public Education were there to introduce me, but the court had been dismissed to avoid any corruption from the two bottles mentioned earlier. The King placed a wreath of heavily scented flowers around my neck as I bowed and asked how my honored presence came to be here. I replied that seeing his glorious face transformed the night’s gloom into sunshine, and because of his generous protection, his good deeds would be remembered by the Gods. He remarked that since I had set foot in his Kingdom, the crops would likely yield seventy percent more than usual. I said that the King’s reputation had spread to all corners of the earth, and that nations ground their teeth in envy when they heard daily about the glories of his domain and the wisdom of his moon-like Prime Minister and lotus-like Director-General of Public Education.

Then we sat down on clean white cushions, and I was at the King’s right hand. Three minutes later he was telling me that the state of the maize crop was something disgraceful, and that the railway-companies would not pay him enough for his timber. The talk shifted to and fro with the bottles, and we discussed very many stately things, and the King became confidential on the subject of Government generally. Most of all he dwelt on the shortcomings of one of his subjects, who, from all I could gather, had been paralyzing the executive.

Then we sat down on clean white cushions, and I was at the King’s right side. Three minutes later, he was telling me that the state of the corn crop was downright embarrassing and that the railway companies weren’t paying him enough for his timber. The conversation bounced around along with the bottles, and we covered a lot of important topics, while the King opened up about the government in general. He especially focused on the failings of one of his subjects, who, from what I could gather, had been hampering the executive.

‘In the old days,’ said the King, ‘I could have ordered the Elephant yonder to trample him to death. Now I must e’en send him seventy miles across the hills to be tried, and his keep would be upon the State. The Elephant eats everything.’

‘Back in the day,’ said the King, ‘I could have just ordered the Elephant over there to trample him to death. Now I have to send him seventy miles across the hills for a trial, and the State has to cover his expenses. The Elephant eats everything.’

‘What be the man’s crimes, Rajah Sahib?’ said I.

‘What are the man's crimes, Rajah Sahib?’ I asked.

‘Firstly, he is an outlander and no man of mine own people. Secondly, since of my favour I gave him land upon his first coming, he refuses to pay revenue. Am I not the lord of the earth, above and below, entitled by right and custom to one-eighth of the crop? Yet this devil, establishing himself, refuses to pay a single tax; and he brings a poisonous spawn of babes.’

‘First of all, he’s an outsider and not one of my people. Secondly, since I granted him land when he first arrived, he won’t pay any taxes. Am I not the lord of the land, both above and below, entitled by right and tradition to one-eighth of the harvest? Yet this guy, making himself at home, refuses to pay a single tax; and he’s bringing a toxic bunch of children.’

‘Cast him into jail,’ I said.

‘Throw him in jail,’ I said.

‘Sahib,’ the King answered, shifting a little on the cushions, ‘once and only once in these forty years sickness came upon me so that I was not able to go abroad. In that hour I made a vow to my God that I would never again cut man or woman from the light of the sun and the air of God; for I perceived the nature of the punishment. How can I break my vow? Were it only the lopping of a hand or a foot I should not delay. But even that is impossible now that the English have rule. One or another of my people’—he looked obliquely at the Director-General of Public Education—‘would at once write a letter to the Viceroy, and perhaps I should be deprived of my ruffle of drums.’

'Sahib,' the King replied, adjusting himself slightly on the cushions, 'only once in these forty years did I fall ill to the point that I couldn't go outside. In that moment, I promised my God that I would never again cut anyone off from the sunlight and the breath of life; I understood the nature of the punishment. How can I break my promise? If it were just the amputation of a hand or a foot, I wouldn't hesitate. But even that is impossible now that the English are in charge. One of my people'—he glanced sideways at the Director-General of Public Education—'would immediately write a letter to the Viceroy, and I might end up losing my drum privileges.'

He unscrewed the mouthpiece of his silver water-pipe, fitted a plain amber mouthpiece, and passed his pipe to me. ‘Not content with refusing revenue,’ he continued, ‘this outlander refuses also the begar’ (this was the corvee or forced labour on the roads) ‘and stirs my people up to the like treason. Yet he is, when he wills, an expert log-snatcher. There is none better or bolder among my people to clear a block of the river when the logs stick fast.’

He unscrewed the mouthpiece of his silver water pipe, attached a simple amber mouthpiece, and handed his pipe to me. "Not only does this outsider refuse to pay taxes," he continued, "but he also refuses to do forced labor" (this was the corvee or mandatory work on the roads) "and incites my people to commit similar acts of betrayal. Yet when he chooses to, he's a master at pulling logs. No one is better or braver among my people when it comes to clearing a blockage in the river when the logs get stuck."

‘But he worships strange Gods,’ said the Prime Minister deferentially.

‘But he worships weird Gods,’ said the Prime Minister respectfully.

‘For that I have no concern,’ said the King, who was as tolerant as Akbar in matters of belief. ‘To each man his own God and the fire or Mother Earth for us all at last. It is the rebellion that offends me.’

‘That doesn't worry me,’ said the King, who was as accepting as Akbar regarding different beliefs. ‘Everyone has their own God, and in the end, we all return to the fire or Mother Earth. It’s the rebellion that bothers me.’

‘The King has an army,’ I suggested. ‘Has not the King burned the man’s house and left him naked to the night dews?’

‘The King has an army,’ I suggested. ‘Hasn’t the King burned down the man’s house and left him exposed to the night air?’

‘Nay, a hut is a hut, and it holds the life of a man. But once, I sent my army against him when his excuses became wearisome: of their heads he brake three across the top with a stick. The other two men ran away. Also the guns would not shoot.’

‘No, a hut is a hut, and it holds a person's life. But once, I sent my army against him when his excuses got tiresome: he broke three of their heads with a stick. The other two men ran away. Also, the guns wouldn't fire.’

I had seen the equipment of the infantry. One-third of it was an old muzzle-loading fowling-piece, with a ragged rust-hole where the nipples should have been, one-third a wire-bound matchlock with a worm-eaten stock, and one-third a four-bore flint duck-gun without a flint.

I had seen the infantry's gear. One-third of it was an old muzzle-loading shotgun, with a ragged rust hole where the nipples should have been, one-third was a wire-bound matchlock with a decaying stock, and one-third was a four-bore flint duck gun that was missing its flint.

‘But it is to be remembered,’ said the King, reaching out for the bottle, ‘that he is a very expert log-snatcher and a man of a merry face. What shall I do to him, Sahib?’

‘But we should keep in mind,’ said the King, reaching for the bottle, ‘that he’s really good at grabbing logs and has a cheerful face. What should I do with him, Sahib?’

This was interesting. The timid hill-folk would as soon have refused taxes to their king as revenues to their Gods.

This was interesting. The shy mountain people would be just as likely to refuse taxes to their king as they would to deny offerings to their gods.

‘If it be the King’s permission,’ I said, ‘I will not strike my tents till the third day and I will see this man. The mercy of the King is God-like, and rebellion is like unto the sin of witchcraft. Moreover, both the bottles and another be empty.’

‘If it's the King’s permission,’ I said, ‘I won’t pack up my tents until the third day and I will see this man. The King’s mercy is God-like, and rebellion is similar to the sin of witchcraft. Besides, both the bottles and another are empty.’

‘You have my leave to go,’ said the King.

‘You have my permission to go,’ said the King.

Next morning a crier went through the state proclaiming that there was a log-jam on the river and that it behoved all loyal subjects to remove it. The people poured down from their villages to the moist warm valley of poppy-fields; and the King and I went with them. Hundreds of dressed deodar-logs had caught on a snag of rock, and the river was bringing down more logs every minute to complete the blockade. The water snarled and wrenched and worried at the timber, and the population of the state began prodding the nearest logs with a pole in the hope of starting a general movement. Then there went up a shout of ‘Namgay Doola! Namgay Doola!’ and a large red-haired villager hurried up, stripping off his clothes as he ran.

The next morning, a crier went through the state announcing that there was a log jam on the river and that all loyal subjects needed to help clear it. The people rushed down from their villages to the warm, damp valley of poppy fields, and the King and I joined them. Hundreds of dressed deodar logs had gotten stuck on a rock, and the river was sending down more logs by the minute to create a blockage. The water thrashed and twisted around the timber, and the locals began poking at the nearest logs with poles in hopes of getting things moving. Then a shout of ‘Namgay Doola! Namgay Doola!’ rose up and a large red-haired villager ran over, shedding his clothes as he went.

‘That is he. That is the rebel,’ said the King. ‘Now will the dam be cleared.’

‘That’s him. That’s the rebel,’ said the King. ‘Now the dam will be cleared.’

‘But why has he red hair?’ I asked, since red hair among hill-folks is as common as blue or green.

‘But why does he have red hair?’ I asked, since red hair among hill folks is as common as blue or green.

‘He is an outlander,’ said the King. ‘Well done! Oh well done!’

‘He’s a stranger,’ said the King. ‘Good job! Oh, good job!’

Namgay Doola had scrambled out on the jam and was clawing out the butt of a log with a rude sort of boat-hook. It slid forward slowly as an alligator moves, three or four others followed it, and the green water spouted through the gaps they had made. Then the villagers howled and shouted and scrambled across the logs, pulling and pushing the obstinate timber, and the red head of Namgay Doola was chief among them all. The logs swayed and chafed and groaned as fresh consignments from upstream battered the now weakening dam. All gave way at last in a smother of foam, racing logs, bobbing black heads and confusion indescribable. The river tossed everything before it. I saw the red head go down with the last remnants of the jam and disappear between the great grinding tree-trunks. It rose close to the bank and blowing like a grampus. Namgay Doola wrung the water out of his eyes and made obeisance to the King. I had time to observe him closely. The virulent redness of his shock head and beard was most startling; and in the thicket of hair wrinkled above high cheek bones shone two very merry blue eyes. He was indeed an outlander, but yet a Thibetan in language, habit, and attire. He spoke the Lepcha dialect with an indescribable softening of the gutturals. It was not so much a lisp as an accent.

Namgay Doola had scrambled out onto the log jam and was using a crude boat hook to pry at the end of a log. It moved forward slowly like an alligator, followed by three or four others, and the green water spurted through the gaps they had created. Then the villagers howled and shouted, scrambling across the logs, pushing and pulling the stubborn timber, with Namgay Doola's red head leading the charge. The logs swayed, rubbed against each other, and creaked as fresh loads from upstream battered the now weakening dam. Eventually, everything gave way in a rush of foam, racing logs, bobbing dark heads, and chaotic confusion. The river carried everything in its path. I saw the red head go under with the last remnants of the log jam and vanish between the massive grinding tree trunks. It resurfaced near the bank, blowing like a whale. Namgay Doola squeezed the water out of his eyes and bowed to the King. I had a moment to observe him closely. The intense redness of his shaggy hair and beard was striking, and amidst the tangled hair, his merry blue eyes shone above high cheekbones. He was definitely an outsider, yet still a Tibetan in language, habits, and clothing. He spoke the Lepcha dialect with a unique softening of the gutturals. It wasn’t quite a lisp, more like an accent.

‘Whence comest thou?’ I asked.

‘Where do you come from?’ I asked.

‘From Thibet.’ He pointed across the hills and grinned. That grin went straight to my heart. Mechanically I held out my hand and Namgay Doola shook it. No pure Thibetan would have understood the meaning of the gesture. He went away to look for his clothes, and as he climbed back to his village, I heard a joyous yell that seemed unaccountably familiar. It was the whooping of Namgay Doola.

‘From Tibet.’ He pointed across the hills and smiled. That smile went straight to my heart. Automatically, I held out my hand and Namgay Doola shook it. No pure Tibetan would have understood the meaning of that gesture. He went off to find his clothes, and as he climbed back to his village, I heard a joyful shout that felt strangely familiar. It was the whoop of Namgay Doola.

‘You see now,’ said the King, ‘why I would not kill him. He is a bold man among my logs, but,’ and he shook his head like a schoolmaster, ‘I know that before long there will be complaints of him in the court. Let us return to the Palace and do justice.’ It was that King’s custom to judge his subjects every day between eleven and three o’clock. I saw him decide equitably in weighty matters of trespass, slander, and a little wife-stealing. Then his brow clouded and he summoned me.

"You see now," said the King, "why I wouldn't kill him. He's a bold man among my workers, but," he shook his head like a teacher, "I know that soon there will be complaints about him in court. Let's go back to the Palace and do what's right." It was the King's usual practice to judge his subjects every day between eleven and three o'clock. I watched him make fair decisions in serious matters like trespassing, slander, and a bit of wife-stealing. Then his expression darkened, and he called for me.

‘Again it is Namgay Doola,’ he said despairingly. ‘Not content with refusing revenue on his own part, he has bound half his village by an oath to the like treason. Never before has such a thing befallen me! Nor are my taxes heavy.’

‘Again it’s Namgay Doola,’ he said in despair. ‘Not only is he refusing to pay his taxes, but he has gotten half his village to swear an oath of the same treason. I’ve never faced anything like this before! And my taxes aren’t even that high.’

A rabbit-faced villager, with a blush-rose stuck behind his ear, advanced trembling. He had been in the conspiracy, but had told everything and hoped for the King’s favour.

A villager with a rabbit-like face and a blush-rose tucked behind his ear approached nervously. He had been part of the conspiracy, but had spilled everything and was hoping for the King's favor.

‘O King,’ said I, ‘if it be the King’s will let this matter stand over till the morning. Only the Gods can do right swiftly, and it may be that yonder villager has lied.’

‘O King,’ I said, ‘if it’s your will, let this matter wait until morning. Only the Gods can judge quickly, and it’s possible that villager has lied.’

‘Nay, for I know the nature of Namgay Doola; but since a guest asks let the matter remain. Wilt thou speak harshly to this red-headed outlander? He may listen to thee.’

‘No, I know what Namgay Doola is like; but since a guest has asked, let's leave it at that. Will you speak harshly to this red-headed outsider? He might actually listen to you.’

I made an attempt that very evening, but for the life of me I could not keep my countenance. Namgay Doola grinned persuasively, and began to tell me about a big brown bear in a poppy-field by the river. Would I care to shoot it? I spoke austerely on the sin of conspiracy, and the certainty of punishment. Namgay Doola’s face clouded for a moment. Shortly afterwards he withdrew from my tent, and I heard him singing to himself softly among the pines. The words were unintelligible to me, but the tune, like his liquid insinuating speech, seemed the ghost of something strangely familiar.

I tried that very evening, but no matter what I did, I couldn't keep a straight face. Namgay Doola smiled convincingly and started telling me about a big brown bear in a poppy field by the river. Did I want to go shoot it? I spoke sternly about the sin of conspiracy and the certainty of punishment. Namgay Doola's expression darkened for a moment. Soon after, he left my tent, and I heard him softly singing to himself among the pines. I couldn't understand the words, but the tune, like his smooth, persuasive voice, felt like a memory of something oddly familiar.

‘Dir hane mard-i-yemen dir To weeree ala gee.’

‘Dir hane mard-i-yemen dir To weeree ala gee.’

sang Namgay Doola again and again, and I racked my brain for that lost tune. It was not till after dinner that I discovered some one had cut a square foot of velvet from the centre of my best camera-cloth. This made me so angry that I wandered down the valley in the hope of meeting the big brown bear. I could hear him grunting like a discontented pig in the poppy-field, and I waited shoulder deep in the dew-dripping Indian corn to catch him after his meal. The moon was at full and drew out the rich scent of the tasselled crop. Then I heard the anguished bellow of a Himalayan cow, one of the little black crummies no bigger than Newfoundland dogs. Two shadows that looked like a bear and her cub hurried past me. I was in act to fire when I saw that they had each a brilliant red head. The lesser animal was trailing some rope behind it that left a dark track on the path. They passed within six feet of me, and the shadow of the moonlight lay velvet-black on their faces. Velvet-black was exactly the word, for by all the powers of moonlight they were masked in the velvet of my camera-cloth! I marvelled and went to bed.

sang Namgay Doola over and over, and I tried to remember that lost tune. It wasn’t until after dinner that I found out someone had cut a square foot of velvet from the center of my best camera cloth. This made me so angry that I wandered down the valley hoping to come across the big brown bear. I could hear him grunting like an unhappy pig in the poppy field, and I waited, waist-deep in the dew-covered Indian corn, to catch him after his meal. The moon was full, bringing out the rich scent of the tasselled crop. Then I heard the pained moo of a Himalayan cow, one of the little black ones no bigger than Newfoundland dogs. Two shadows that looked like a bear and her cub hurried past me. I was about to fire when I noticed they each had a brilliant red head. The smaller animal was dragging some rope behind it that left a dark mark on the path. They passed within six feet of me, and the moonlight cast a velvet-black shadow on their faces. Velvet-black was the perfect description, for under the moonlight they were masked in the velvet of my camera cloth! I was amazed and went to bed.

Next morning the Kingdom was in uproar. Namgay Doola, men said, had gone forth in the night and with a sharp knife had cut off the tail of a cow belonging to the rabbit-faced villager who had betrayed him. It was sacrilege unspeakable against the Holy Cow. The State desired his blood, but he had retreated into his hut, barricaded the doors and windows with big stones, and defied the world.

Next morning, the Kingdom was in chaos. People said that Namgay Doola had gone out at night and, using a sharp knife, cut off the tail of a cow belonging to the rabbit-faced villager who had betrayed him. It was an unspeakable sacrilege against the Holy Cow. The authorities wanted his blood, but he had retreated into his hut and barricaded the doors and windows with big stones, defiantly standing against the world.

The King and I and the populace approached the hut cautiously. There was no hope of capturing the man without loss of life, for from a hole in the wall projected the muzzle of an extremely well-cared-for gun—the only gun in the State that could shoot. Namgay Doola had narrowly missed a villager just before we came up. The Standing Army stood. It could do no more, for when it advanced pieces of sharp shale flew from the windows. To these were added from time to time showers of scalding water. We saw red heads bobbing up and down in the hut. The family of Namgay Doola were aiding their sire, and blood-curdling yells of defiance were the only answers to our prayers.

The King and I, along with the crowd, approached the hut cautiously. There was no chance of capturing the man without risking lives, because from a hole in the wall, the muzzle of a well-maintained gun was sticking out— the only gun in the State that could actually fire. Namgay Doola had barely missed hitting a villager just before we arrived. The Standing Army stood still. They couldn’t do anything more, because whenever they advanced, sharp pieces of shale flew out from the windows. Occasionally, they were also met with showers of scalding water. We saw red heads bobbing up and down inside the hut. Namgay Doola's family was helping him, and all we received in response to our prayers were terrifying yells of defiance.

‘Never,’ said the King, puffing, ‘has such a thing befallen my State. Next year I will certainly buy a little cannon.’ He looked at me imploringly.

‘Never,’ said the King, out of breath, ‘has anything like this happened to my State. Next year, I’m definitely getting a small cannon.’ He looked at me desperately.

‘Is there any priest in the Kingdom to whom he will listen?’ said I, for a light was beginning to break upon me.

‘Is there any priest in the Kingdom he would listen to?’ I asked, as I started to understand more clearly.

‘He worships his own God,’ said the Prime Minister. ‘We can starve him out.’

‘He worships his own God,’ said the Prime Minister. ‘We can starve him out.’

‘Let the white man approach,’ said Namgay Doola from within. ‘All others I will kill. Send me the white man.’

‘Let the white man come forward,’ said Namgay Doola from inside. ‘I will kill everyone else. Bring me the white man.’

The door was thrown open and I entered the smoky interior of a Thibetan hut crammed with children. And every child had flaming red hair. A raw cow’s-tail lay on the floor, and by its side two pieces of black velvet—my black velvet—rudely hacked into the semblance of masks.

The door swung open and I stepped into the smoky interior of a Tibetan hut packed with kids. Every kid had bright red hair. A raw cow’s tail was on the floor, and next to it were two pieces of black velvet—my black velvet—roughly cut into what looked like masks.

‘And what is this shame, Namgay Doola?’ said I.

‘And what is this shame, Namgay Doola?’ I asked.

He grinned more winningly than ever. ‘There is no shame,’ said he. ‘I did but cut off the tail of that man’s cow. He betrayed me. I was minded to shoot him, Sahib. But not to death. Indeed not to death. Only in the legs.’

He smiled more charmingly than before. "There’s no shame," he said. "I just cut off that guy's cow's tail. He betrayed me. I was thinking about shooting him, sir. But not to kill him. Definitely not to kill him. Just in the legs."

‘And why at all, since it is the custom to pay revenue to the King? Why at all?’

‘And why should we bother, since it's the norm to pay taxes to the King? Why even bother?’

‘By the God of my father I cannot tell,’ said Namgay Doola.

‘By the God of my father, I can't say,’ said Namgay Doola.

‘And who was thy father?’

‘And who was your father?’

‘The same that had this gun.’ He showed me his weapon—a Tower musket bearing date 1832 and the stamp of the Honourable East India Company.

‘The same that had this gun.’ He showed me his weapon—a Tower musket dated 1832 with the stamp of the Honourable East India Company.

‘And thy father’s name?’ said I.

‘And what is your father's name?’ I asked.

‘Timlay Doola,’ said he. ‘At the first, I being then a little child, it is in my mind that he wore a red coat.’

‘Timlay Doola,’ he said. ‘When I was a small child, I remember him wearing a red coat.’

‘Of that I have no doubt. But repeat the name of thy father thrice or four times.’

‘Of that, I have no doubt. But say your father’s name three or four times.’

He obeyed, and I understood whence the puzzling accent in his speech came. ‘Thimla Dhula,’ said he excitedly. ‘To this hour I worship his God.’

He complied, and I realized where the puzzling accent in his speech originated. ‘Thimla Dhula,’ he said excitedly. ‘To this day, I worship his God.’

‘May I see that God?’

“Can I see that God?”

‘In a little while—at twilight time.’

‘In a bit—at dusk.’

‘Rememberest thou aught of thy father’s speech?’

‘Do you remember anything of your father’s speech?’

‘It is long ago. But there is one word which he said often. Thus “Shun.” Then I and my brethren stood upon our feet, our hands to our sides. Thus.’

‘It was a long time ago. But there’s one word he said frequently. That is “Shun.” Then my friends and I stood up, our hands at our sides. Like this.’

‘Even so. And what was thy mother?’

‘Even so. And what was your mother?’

‘A woman of the hills. We be Lepchas of Darjeeling, but me they call an outlander because my hair is as thou seest.’

‘A woman of the hills. We are Lepchas of Darjeeling, but they call me an outlander because my hair is as you see.’

The Thibetan woman, his wife, touched him on the arm gently. The long parley outside the fort had lasted far into the day. It was now close upon twilight—the hour of the Angelus. Very solemnly, the red-headed brats rose from the floor and formed a semicircle. Namgay Doola laid his gun against the wall, lighted a little oil lamp, and set it before a recess in the wall. Pulling aside a curtain of dirty cloth, he revealed a worn brass crucifix leaning against the helmet-badge of a long forgotten East India regiment. ‘Thus did my father,’ he said, crossing himself clumsily. The wife and children followed suit. Then all together they struck up the wailing chant that I heard on the hillside—

The Tibetan woman, his wife, gently touched his arm. The long discussion outside the fort had gone on well into the day. It was now nearly twilight—the hour of the Angelus. Very solemnly, the red-headed kids got up from the floor and formed a semicircle. Namgay Doola leaned his gun against the wall, lit a small oil lamp, and placed it in front of a recess in the wall. Pulling aside a curtain of grimy cloth, he revealed a worn brass crucifix leaning against the helmet badge of a long-forgotten East India regiment. ‘This is what my father did,’ he said, crossing himself awkwardly. The wife and children followed his lead. Then all together, they began the wailing chant that I heard on the hillside—

 Dir bane mard-i-yemen dir
 To weeree ala gee.
Dir bane mard-i-yemen dir To weeree ala gee.

I was puzzled no longer. Again and again they crooned, as if their hearts would break, their version of the chorus of the Wearing of the Green—

I was no longer confused. Again and again they sang softly, as if their hearts would shatter, their rendition of the chorus of the Wearing of the Green—

They’re hanging men and women too, For the wearing of the green.

They’re hanging men and women as well, for wearing green.

A diabolical inspiration came to me. One of the brats, a boy about eight years old, was watching me as he sang. I pulled out a rupee, held the coin between finger and thumb and looked—only looked—at the gun against the wall. A grin of brilliant and perfect comprehension overspread the face of the child. Never for an instant stopping the song, he held out his hand for the money, and then slid the gun to my hand. I might have shot Namgay Doola as he chanted. But I was satisfied. The blood-instinct of the race held true. Namgay Doola drew the curtain across the recess. Angelus was over.

A wicked idea struck me. One of the kids, a boy about eight years old, was watching me as he sang. I pulled out a rupee, held the coin between my finger and thumb, and just looked at the gun on the wall. A bright, knowing grin spread across the child’s face. Without skipping a beat in his song, he reached out his hand for the money and then handed me the gun. I could have shot Namgay Doola while he was singing. But I was content. The instinct for blood in our bloodline remained strong. Namgay Doola drew the curtain across the recess. Angelus was over.

‘Thus my father sang. There was much more, but I have forgotten, and I do not know the purport of these words, but it may be that the God will understand. I am not of this people, and I will not pay revenue.’

‘So my father sang. There was a lot more, but I’ve forgotten it, and I don’t really know what these words mean, but maybe God will understand. I’m not one of these people, and I won’t pay taxes.’

‘And why?’

'And why is that?'

Again that soul-compelling grin. ‘What occupation would be to me between crop and crop? It is better than scaring bears. But these people do not understand.’ He picked the masks from the floor, and looked in my face as simply as a child.

Again that soul-compelling grin. ‘What would I do between harvests? It’s better than scaring bears. But these people don’t get it.’ He picked up the masks from the floor and looked at my face as simply as a child.

‘By what road didst thou attain knowledge to make these devilries?’ I said, pointing.

‘By what way did you gain the knowledge to create these devilish things?’ I asked, pointing.

‘I cannot tell. I am but a Lepcha of Darjeeling, and yet the stuff—’

‘I can't say. I'm just a Lepcha from Darjeeling, and yet the stuff—’

‘Which thou hast stolen.’

'That you have stolen.'

‘Nay, surely. Did I steal? I desired it so. The stuff—the stuff—what else should I have done with the stuff?’ He twisted the velvet between his fingers.

‘No way. Did I steal? I wanted it that much. The stuff—the stuff—what else would I have done with it?’ He twisted the velvet between his fingers.

‘But the sin of maiming the cow—consider that.’

‘But think about the sin of injuring the cow—consider that.’

‘That is true; but oh, Sahib, that man betrayed me and I had no thought—but the heifer’s tail waved in the moonlight and I had my knife. What else should I have done? The tail came off ere I was aware. Sahib, thou knowest more than I.’

‘That is true; but oh, Sir, that man betrayed me and I didn’t even think—but the heifer’s tail was waving in the moonlight and I had my knife. What else was I supposed to do? The tail came off before I even realized it. Sir, you know more than I do.’

‘That is true,’ said I. ‘Stay within the door. I go to speak to the King.’

"That's true," I said. "Stay by the door. I'm going to talk to the King."

The population of the State were ranged on the hillsides. I went forth and spoke to the King.

The people of the State were gathered on the hillsides. I went out and talked to the King.

‘O King,’ said I. ‘Touching this man there be two courses open to thy wisdom. Thou canst either hang him from a tree, he and his brood, till there remains no hair that is red within the land.’

‘O King,’ I said. ‘Regarding this man, you have two options available to your judgment. You can either hang him and his family from a tree until there is no trace of red hair left in the land.’

‘Nay’ said the King. ‘Why should I hurt the little children?’

‘No,’ said the King. ‘Why would I want to hurt the little children?’

They had poured out of the hut door and were making plump obeisance to everybody. Namgay Doola waited with his gun across his arm.

They had rushed out of the hut door and were bowing deeply to everyone. Namgay Doola stood by with his gun resting on his arm.

‘Or thou canst, discarding the impiety of the cow-maiming, raise him to honour in thy Army. He comes of a race that will not pay revenue. A red flame is in his blood which comes out at the top of his head in that glowing hair. Make him chief of the Army. Give him honour as may befall, and full allowance of work, but look to it, O King, that neither he nor his hold a foot of earth from thee henceforward. Feed him with words and favour, and also liquor from certain bottles that thou knowest of, and he will be a bulwark of defence. But deny him even a tuft of grass for his own. This is the nature that God has given him. Moreover he has brethren—’

'You can either, by putting aside the wickedness of harming cows, elevate him to a position of honor in your Army. He comes from a lineage that refuses to pay taxes. There’s a fierce passion in his blood that shows itself in that fiery hair. Make him the leader of the Army. Grant him respect as is fitting, and a full share of responsibilities, but be warned, O King, that neither he nor his should claim a single plot of land from you from now on. Feed him with praise and favors, and also drinks from certain bottles that you know of, and he will be a strong defense. But deny him even a blade of grass for himself. This is the character that God has given him. Furthermore, he has brothers—’

The State groaned unanimously.

The State groaned in unison.

‘But if his brethren come, they will surely fight with each other till they die; or else the one will always give information concerning the other. Shall he be of thy Army, O King? Choose.’

‘But if his brothers come, they will definitely fight with each other until they die; or else one will always snitch on the other. Should he be part of your army, O King? Make a choice.’

The King bowed his head, and I said, ‘Come forth, Namgay Doola, and command the King’s Army. Thy name shall no more be Namgay in the mouths of men, but Patsay Doola, for as thou hast said, I know.’

The King bowed his head, and I said, ‘Step forward, Namgay Doola, and lead the King’s Army. Your name will no longer be Namgay in the mouths of people, but Patsay Doola, for as you have said, I know.’

Then Namgay Doola, new christened Patsay Doola, son of Timlay Doola, which is Tim Doolan gone very wrong indeed, clasped the King’s feet, cuffed the Standing Army, and hurried in an agony of contrition from temple to temple, making offerings for the sin of cattle-maiming.

Then Namgay Doola, now called Patsay Doola, son of Timlay Doola, who is Tim Doolan gone very wrong indeed, clasped the King’s feet, confronted the Standing Army, and rushed in anguish from temple to temple, making offerings for the sin of cattle-maiming.

And the King was so pleased with my perspicacity, that he offered to sell me a village for twenty pounds sterling. But I buy no villages in the Himalayas so long as one red head flares between the tail of the heaven-climbing glacier and the dark birch-forest.

And the King was so impressed with my insight that he offered to sell me a village for twenty pounds. But I won't buy any villages in the Himalayas as long as one red head is visible between the tip of the glacier and the dark birch forest.

I know that breed.

I recognize that breed.





BURTRAN AND BIMI

The orang-outang in the big iron cage lashed to the sheep-pen began the discussion. The night was stiflingly hot, and as I and Hans Breitmann, the big-beamed German, passed him, dragging our bedding to the fore-peak of the steamer, he roused himself and chattered obscenely. He had been caught somewhere in the Malayan Archipelago, and was going to England to be exhibited at a shilling a head. For four days he had struggled, yelled, and wrenched at the heavy bars of his prison without ceasing, and had nearly slain a lascar, incautious enough to come within reach of the great hairy paw.

The orangutan in the big iron cage tied to the sheep pen started the conversation. The night was oppressively hot, and as Hans Breitmann, the big-built German, and I walked past him, pulling our bedding to the front of the steamer, he woke up and chattered rudely. He had been captured somewhere in the Malay Archipelago and was heading to England to be displayed for a shilling a person. For four days, he had struggled, yelled, and pulled at the heavy bars of his cell non-stop, and had almost attacked a lascar who was careless enough to come within reach of his massive, hairy paw.

‘It would be well for you, mine friend, if you was a liddle seasick,’ said Hans Breitmann, pausing by the cage.’ You haf too much Ego in your Cosmos.’

‘It would be good for you, my friend, if you were a little seasick,’ said Hans Breitmann, pausing by the cage. ‘You have too much ego in your universe.’

The orang-outang’s arm slid out negligently from between the bars. No one would have believed that it would make a sudden snakelike rush at the German’s breast. The thin silk of the sleeping-suit tore out; Hans stepped back unconcernedly to pluck a banana from a bunch hanging close to one of the boats.

The orangutan's arm casually reached out between the bars. No one would have thought it would suddenly lunge like a snake at the German's chest. The thin silk of the pajama ripped; Hans stepped back nonchalantly to grab a banana from a bunch hanging near one of the boats.

‘Too much Ego,’ said he, peeling the fruit and offering it to the caged devil, who was rending the silk to tatters.

‘Too much ego,’ he said, peeling the fruit and offering it to the caged devil, who was tearing the silk to shreds.

Then we laid out our bedding in the bows among the sleeping Lascars, to catch any breeze that the pace of the ship might give us. The sea was like smoky oil, except where it turned to fire under our forefoot and whirled back into the dark in smears of dull flame. There was a thunderstorm some miles away; we could see the glimmer of the lightning. The ship’s cow, distressed by the heat and the smell of the ape-beast in the cage, lowed unhappily from time to time in exactly the same key as that in which the look-out man answered the hourly call from the bridge. The trampling tune of the engines was very distinct, and the jarring of the ash-lift, as it was tipped into the sea, hurt the procession of hushed noise. Hans lay down by my side and lighted a good-night cigar. This was naturally the beginning of conversation. He owned a voice as soothing as the wash of the sea, and stores of experiences as vast as the sea itself; for his business in life was to wander up and down the world, collecting orchids and wild beasts and ethnological specimens for German and American dealers. I watched the glowing end of his cigar wax and wane in the gloom, as the sentences rose and fell, till I was nearly asleep. The orang-outang, troubled by some dream of the forests of his freedom, began to yell like a soul in purgatory, and to pluck madly at the bars of the cage.

Then we spread out our bedding in the front part of the ship among the sleeping Lascars, trying to catch any breeze from the ship's movement. The sea looked like smoky oil, except where it lit up like fire under our feet and swirled back into the dark with streaks of dull flame. There was a thunderstorm a few miles away; we could see the glimmer of the lightning. The ship’s cow, uncomfortable from the heat and the smell of the ape in the cage, mooed unhappily now and then, matching the tone of the lookout man answering the hourly call from the bridge. The rhythmic sound of the engines was very clear, and the clanking of the ash-lift as it was dumped into the sea disrupted the flow of the quiet noise. Hans lay down beside me and lit up a good-night cigar. Naturally, this sparked a conversation. He had a voice as soothing as the sound of the sea, with stories as vast as the ocean itself; his job was to travel the world, collecting orchids, wild animals, and ethnological specimens for German and American dealers. I watched the glowing tip of his cigar flicker in the dark as our words rose and fell until I was nearly asleep. The orangutan, disturbed by some dream of his free forests, started to yell like a soul in purgatory and frantically grabbed at the bars of the cage.

‘If he was out now dere would not be much of us left hereabout,’ said Hans lazily. ‘He screams goot. See, now, how I shall tame him when he stops himself.’

‘If he were out now, there wouldn’t be many of us left around here,’ said Hans lazily. ‘He screams well. Look now, how I will tame him once he calms down.’

There was a pause in the outcry, and from Hans’ mouth came an imitation of a snake’s hiss, so perfect that I almost sprang to my feet. The sustained murderous sound ran along the deck, and the wrenching at the bars ceased. The orang-outang was quaking in an ecstasy of pure terror.

There was a break in the commotion, and from Hans’ mouth came a snake-like hiss so realistic that I almost jumped up. The intense, deadly sound traveled across the deck, and the struggling at the bars stopped. The orangutan was shaking in pure terror.

‘Dot stopped him,’ said Hans. ‘I learned dot trick in Mogoung Tanjong when I was collecting liddle monkeys for some peoples in Berlin. Efery one in der world is afraid of der monkeys—except der snake. So I blay snake against monkey, and he keep quite still. Dere was too much Ego in his Cosmos. Dot is der soul-custom of monkeys. Are you asleep, or will you listen, and I will tell a dale dot you shall not pelief?’

‘Dot stopped him,’ said Hans. ‘I learned that trick in Mogoung Tanjong when I was collecting little monkeys for some people in Berlin. Everyone in the world is afraid of the monkeys—except the snake. So I play snake against monkey, and he stays completely still. There was too much ego in his universe. That is the natural behavior of monkeys. Are you asleep, or will you listen, and I will tell you a story that you won’t believe?’

‘There’s no tale in the wide world that I can’t believe,’ I said.

‘There’s no story in the whole world that I can’t believe,’ I said.

‘If you haf learned pelief you haf learned somedings. Now I shall try your pelief. Goot! When I was collecting dose liddle monkeys—it was in ‘79 or ‘80, und I was in der islands of der Archipelago—over dere in der dark’—he pointed southward to New Guinea generally—‘Mein Gott! I would sooner collect life red devils than liddle monkeys. When dey do not bite off your thumbs dey are always dying from nostalgia—home-sick—for dey haf der imperfect soul, which is midway arrested in defelopment—und too much Ego. I was dere for nearly a year, und dere I found a man dot was called Bertran. He was a Frenchman, und he was goot man—naturalist to his bone. Dey said he was an escaped convict, but he was naturalist, und dot was enough for me. He would call all der life beasts from der forest, und dey would come. I said he was St. Francis of Assizi in a new dransmigration produced, und he laughed und said he haf never preach to der fishes. He sold dem for tripang—beche-de-mer.

‘If you’ve learned to believe, you’ve learned something. Now I’m going to test your belief. Good! When I was collecting those little monkeys—it was in ‘79 or ‘80, and I was in the islands of the Archipelago—over there in the dark’—he pointed southward to New Guinea generally—‘My God! I would rather collect living red devils than little monkeys. When they’re not biting off your thumbs, they’re always dying from nostalgia—homesick—because they have an imperfect soul, which is stuck in development—and too much Ego. I was there for nearly a year, and there I met a man named Bertran. He was a Frenchman, and he was a good man—a naturalist to his core. They said he was an escaped convict, but he was a naturalist, and that was enough for me. He could call all the animals from the forest, and they would come. I said he was St. Francis of Assisi in a new incarnation, and he laughed and said he had never preached to the fish. He sold them for tripang—beche-de-mer.

‘Und dot man, who was king of beasts-tamer men, he had in der house shust such anoder as dot devil-animal in der cage—a great orang-outang dot thought he was a man. He haf found him when he was a child—der orang-outang—und he was child und brother und opera comique all round to Betran. He had his room in dot house—not a cage, but a room—mit a bed und sheets, und he would go to bed und get up in der morning und smoke his cigar und eat his dinner mit Bertran, und walk mit him hand in hand, which was most horrible. Herr Gott! I haf seen dot beast throw himself back in his chair und laugh when Bertran haf made fun of me. He was NOT a beast; he was a man, und he talked to Bertran, und Bertran comprehend, for I have seen dem. Und he was always politeful to me except when I talk too long to Bertran und say nodings at all to him. Den he would pull me away—dis great, dark devil, mit his enormous paws—shust as if I was a child. He was not a beast; he was a man. Dis I saw pefore I know him three months, und Bertran he haf saw the same; and Bimi, der orang-outang, haf understood us both, mit his cigar between his big dog-teeth und der blue gum.

‘And that man, who was the king of beast-tamers, had in his house just such another as that devil-animal in the cage—a great orangutan who thought he was a man. He had found him when he was a child—the orangutan—and he was like a child and a brother and a comic opera all rolled into one for Bertran. He had his room in that house—not a cage, but a room—with a bed and sheets, and he would go to bed and get up in the morning and smoke his cigar and eat his dinner with Bertran, and walk with him hand in hand, which was quite dreadful. My God! I have seen that beast throw himself back in his chair and laugh when Bertran made fun of me. He was NOT a beast; he was a man, and he talked to Bertran, and Bertran understood, for I have seen them. And he was always polite to me except when I talked too long to Bertran and didn’t say anything at all to him. Then he would pull me away—this great, dark devil, with his enormous paws—just as if I were a child. He was not a beast; he was a man. This I saw before I knew him for three months, and Bertran saw the same; and Bimi, the orangutan, understood us both, with his cigar between his big dog-teeth and the blue gum.

‘I was dere a year, dere und at dere oder islands—somedimes for monkeys und somedimes for butterflies und orchits. One time Bertran says to me dot he will be married, because he haf found a girl dot was goot, und he enquire if this marrying idee was right. I would not say, pecause it was not me dot was going to be married. Den he go off courting der girl—she was a half-caste French girl—very pretty. Haf you got a new light for my cigar? Ouf! Very pretty. Only I say, “Haf you thought of Bimi? If he pull me away when I talk to you, what will he do to your wife? He will pull her in pieces. If I was you, Bertran, I would gif my wife for wedding-present der stuff figure of Bimi.” By dot time I had learned some dings about der monkey peoples. “Shoot him?” says Bertran. “He is your beast,” I said; “if he was mine he would be shot now!”

‘I was there for a year, there and at the other islands—sometimes for monkeys and sometimes for butterflies and orchids. One time, Bertran says to me that he’s going to get married because he found a good girl, and he asks if this marriage idea is right. I wouldn’t say, because I wasn’t the one getting married. Then he went off courting the girl—she was a pretty half-caste French girl. Have you got a new light for my cigar? Wow! Very pretty. I only said, “Have you thought about Bimi? If he pulls me away when I talk to you, what will he do to your wife? He’ll tear her apart. If I were you, Bertran, I would give my wife as a wedding present the stuffed figure of Bimi.” By that time, I had learned some things about the monkey people. “Shoot him?” says Bertran. “He’s your beast,” I said; “if he were mine, he would be shot by now!”

‘Den I felt at der back of my neck der fingers of Bimi. Mein Gott! I tell you dot he talked through dose fingers. It was der deaf-and-dumb alphabet all gomplete. He slide his hairy arm round my neck, und he tilt up my chin und looked into my face, shust to see if I understood his talk so well as he understood mine.

‘Then I felt Bimi’s fingers at the back of my neck. My God! I tell you that he communicated through those fingers. It was the complete deaf-and-dumb alphabet. He slid his hairy arm around my neck, tilted up my chin, and looked into my face, just to see if I understood his message as well as he understood mine.

‘“See now dere!” says Bertran, “und you would shoot him while he is cuddlin’ you? Dot is der Teuton ingrate!”

‘“Look at that!” says Bertran, “and you would shoot him while he’s cuddling you? That’s the German ingrate!”’

‘But I knew dot I had made Bimi a life’s-enemy, pecause his fingers haf talk murder through the back of my neck. Next dime I see Bimi dere was a pistol in my belt, und he touched it once, und I open der breech to show him it was loaded. He haf seen der liddle monkeys killed in der woods: he understood.

‘But I knew that I had made Bimi a lifelong enemy because his fingers had talked murder through the back of my neck. The next time I saw Bimi there was a pistol in my belt, and he touched it once, and I opened the breech to show him it was loaded. He had seen the little monkeys killed in the woods: he understood.

‘So Bertran he was married, and he forgot clean about Bimi dot was skippin’ alone on der beach mit der half of a human soul in his belly. I was see him skip, und he took a big bough und thrash der sand till he haf made a great hole like a grave. So I says to Bertran, “For any sakes, kill Bimi. He is mad mit der jealousy.”

‘So Bertran was married, and he completely forgot about Bimi who was skipping alone on the beach with half a human soul in his belly. I saw him skip, and he took a big branch and thrashed the sand until he had made a great hole like a grave. So I said to Bertran, “For goodness’ sake, kill Bimi. He’s driven mad with jealousy.”

‘Bertran haf said “He is not mad at all. He haf obey und lofe my wife, und if she speak he will get her slippers,” und he looked at his wife agross der room. She was a very pretty girl.

‘Bertran has said, “He’s not mad at all. He obeys and loves my wife, and if she speaks, he’ll get her slippers,” and he looked at his wife across the room. She was a very pretty girl.

‘Den I said to him, “Dost dou pretend to know monkeys und dis beast dot is lashing himself mad upon der sands, pecause you do not talk to him? Shoot him when he comes to der house, for he haf der light in his eye dot means killing—und killing.” Bimi come to der house, but dere was no light in his eye. It was all put away, cunning—so cunning—und he fetch der girl her slippers, und Bertran turn to me und say, “Dost dou know him in nine months more dan I haf known him in twelve years? Shall a child stab his fader? I haf fed him, und he was my child. Do not speak this nonsense to my wife or to me any more.”

‘Then I said to him, “Do you really think you know monkeys and this beast that is thrashing madly on the sand, just because you don’t talk to him? Shoot him when he comes to the house, because he has the light in his eye that means killing—killing.” Bimi came to the house, but there was no light in his eye. It was all hidden away, clever—so clever—and he brought the girl her slippers, and Bertran turned to me and said, “Do you know him in nine months better than I have known him in twelve years? Should a child stab his father? I have fed him, and he was my child. Don’t talk this nonsense to my wife or to me anymore.”

‘Dot next day Bertran came to my house to help me make some wood cases for der specimens, und he tell me dot he haf left his wife a liddle while mit Bimi in der garden. Den I finish my cases quick, und I say, “Let us go to your houses und get a trink.” He laugh and say, “Come along, dry mans.”

‘The next day, Bertran came to my house to help me make some wooden cases for the specimens, and he told me that he had left his wife for a little while with Bimi in the garden. Then I finished my cases quickly, and I said, “Let’s go to your place and have a drink.” He laughed and said, “Come on, dry man.”

‘His wife was not in der garden, und Bimi did not come when Bertran called. Und his wife did not come when he called, und he knocked at her bedroom door und dot was shut tight—locked. Den he look at me, und his face was white. I broke down der door mit my shoulder, und der thatch of der roof was torn into a great hole, und der sun came in upon der floor. Haf you ever seen paper in der waste-basket, or cards at whist on der table scattered? Dere was no wife dot could be seen. I tell you dere was nodings in dot room dot might be a woman. Dere was stuff on der floor und dot was all. I looked at dese things und I was very sick; but Bertran looked a liddle longer at what was upon the floor und der walls, und der hole in der thatch. Den he pegan to laugh, soft und low, und I knew und thank Gott dot he was mad. He nefer cried, he nefer prayed. He stood all still in der doorway und laugh to himself. Den he said, “She haf locked herself in dis room, and he haf torn up der thatch. Fi donc! Dot is so. We will mend der thatch und wait for Bimi. He will surely come.”

‘His wife was not in the garden, and Bimi didn’t come when Bertran called. And his wife didn’t come when he called, and he knocked on her bedroom door and it was shut tight—locked. Then he looked at me, and his face was pale. I broke down the door with my shoulder, and the thatch of the roof was torn into a big hole, and the sun came in onto the floor. Have you ever seen paper in the wastebasket, or cards from a game scattered on the table? There was no wife to be seen. I tell you there was nothing in that room that might indicate a woman. There was stuff on the floor and that was all. I looked at these things and I felt very sick; but Bertran looked a little longer at what was on the floor and the walls, and the hole in the thatch. Then he began to laugh, soft and low, and I knew and thanked God that he was mad. He never cried, he never prayed. He stood still in the doorway and laughed to himself. Then he said, “She has locked herself in this room, and he has torn up the thatch. Good grief! That is so. We will fix the thatch and wait for Bimi. He will surely come.”’

‘I tell you we waited ten days in dot house, after der room was made into a room again, und once or twice we saw Bimi comin’ a liddle way from der woods. He was afraid pecause he haf done wrong. Bertran called him when he was come to look on the tenth day, und Bimi come skipping along der beach und making noises, mit a long piece of black hair in his hands. Den Bertran laugh and say, “Fi donc!” shust as if it was a glass broken upon der table; und Bimi come nearer, und Bertran was honey-sweet in his voice und laughed to himself. For three days he made love to Bimi, pecause Bimi would not let himself be touched. Den Bimi come to dinner at der same table mit us, und the hair on his hands was all black und thick mit-mit what had dried on der hands. Bertran gave him sangaree till Bimi was drunk and stupid, und den——’

‘I tell you, we waited ten days in that house after the room was fixed up again, and once or twice we saw Bimi coming a little way from the woods. He was scared because he had done something wrong. Bertran called him when he came to look on the tenth day, and Bimi came skipping along the beach making noises, with a long piece of black hair in his hands. Then Bertran laughed and said, “Oh no!” just as if it was a glass breaking on the table; and Bimi came nearer, and Bertran was sweet as honey in his voice and laughed to himself. For three days he flirted with Bimi because Bimi wouldn’t let himself be touched. Then Bimi came to dinner at the same table with us, and the hair on his hands was all black and thick with what had dried on them. Bertran gave him sangaree until Bimi was drunk and foolish, and then——’

Hans paused to puff at his cigar.

Hans paused to take a puff from his cigar.

‘And then?’ said I.

"What's next?" I said.

‘Und den Bertran he kill him mit his hands, und I go for a walk upon der beach. It was Bertran’s own piziness. When I come back der ape he was dead, und Bertran he was dying abofe him; but still he laughed liddle und low und he was quite content. Now you know der formula of der strength of der orang-outang—it is more as seven to one in relation to man. But Bertran, he haf killed Bimi mit sooch dings as Gott gif him. Dot was der miracle.’

‘And Bertran killed him with his bare hands, and I went for a walk on the beach. It was Bertran’s own business. When I came back, the ape was dead, and Bertran was dying above him; but still he laughed a little and quietly, and he seemed quite content. Now you know the formula for the strength of the orangutan—it is more than seven to one compared to a human. But Bertran had killed Bimi with what God gave him. That was the miracle.’

The infernal clamour in the cage recommenced. ‘Aha! Dot friend of ours haf still too much Ego in his Cosmos. Be quiet, dou!’

The loud noise in the cage started again. ‘Aha! Our friend still has too much Ego in his Universe. Be quiet, you!’

Hans hissed long and venomously. We could hear the great beast quaking in his cage.

Hans hissed loudly and angrily. We could hear the huge beast shaking in his cage.

‘But why in the world didn’t you help Bertran instead of letting him be killed?’ I asked.

‘But why didn’t you help Bertran instead of just letting him get killed?’ I asked.

‘My friend,’ said Hans, composedly stretching himself to slumber, ‘it was not nice even to mineself dot I should live after I haf seen dot room mit der hole in der thatch. Und Bertran, he was her husband. Goot-night, und—sleep well.’

‘My friend,’ said Hans, calmly settling down to sleep, ‘it wasn’t pleasant even for me to think I’d live after seeing that room with the hole in the roof. And Bertran, he was her husband. Good night, and—sleep well.’





MOTI GUJ—MUTINEER

Once upon a time there was a coffee-planter in India who wished to clear some forest land for coffee-planting. When he had cut down all the trees and burned the under-wood the stumps still remained. Dynamite is expensive and slow-fire slow. The happy medium for stump-clearing is the lord of all beats, who is the elephant. He will either push the stump out of the ground with his tusks, if he has any, or drag it out with ropes. The planter, therefore, hired elephants by ones and twos and threes, and fell to work. The very best of all the elephants belonged to the very worst of all the drivers or mahouts; and the superior beast’s name was Moti Guj. He was the absolute property of his mahout, which would never have been the case under native rule, for Moti Guj was a creature to be desired by kings; and his name, being translated, meant the Pearl Elephant. Because the British Government was in the land, Deesa, the mahout, enjoyed his property undisturbed. He was dissipated. When he had made much money through the strength of his elephant, he would get extremely drunk and give Moti Guj a beating with a tent-peg over the tender nails of the forefeet. Moti Guj never trampled the life out of Deesa on these occasions, for he knew that after the beating was over Deesa would embrace his trunk and weep and call him his love and his life and the liver of his soul, and give him some liquor. Moti Guj was very fond of liquor—arrack for choice, though he would drink palm-tree toddy if nothing better offered. Then Deesa would go to sleep between Moti Guj’s forefeet, and as Deesa generally chose the middle of the public road, and as Moti Guj mounted guard over him and would not permit horse, foot, or cart to pass by, traffic was congested till Deesa saw fit to wake up.

Once upon a time, there was a coffee planter in India who wanted to clear some forest land for planting coffee. After he cut down all the trees and burned the underbrush, the stumps were still left behind. Dynamite is expensive, and slow-burning methods take too long. The best solution for removing stumps is an elephant. The elephant can either push the stump out of the ground with its tusks or drag it out with ropes. So, the planter hired elephants, one by one or in groups, and got to work. The best elephant of all belonged to the worst driver, or mahout, and the elephant’s name was Moti Guj. He was entirely the property of his mahout, which wouldn’t have been the case under local rule, as Moti Guj was an elephant that kings would desire; his name translates to the Pearl Elephant. Because the British Government was present in the area, Deesa, the mahout, could enjoy ownership of his property without disturbance. He was irresponsible. Whenever he made a lot of money from his elephant’s strength, he would get extremely drunk and hit Moti Guj with a tent peg on the sensitive nails of his front feet. Moti Guj never stomped on Deesa during these moments because he knew that once the beating was over, Deesa would hug his trunk, cry, call him his love and his life, and give him some liquor. Moti Guj loved liquor—preferably arrack, but he would drink palm tree toddy if nothing better was available. After that, Deesa would fall asleep between Moti Guj’s front feet, and since Deesa usually chose the middle of the public road and Moti Guj kept watch over him, blocking any horses, people, or carts from passing by, traffic became congested until Deesa decided to wake up.

There was no sleeping in the daytime on the planter’s clearing: the wages were too high to risk. Deesa sat on Moti Guj’s neck and gave him orders, while Moti Guj rooted up the stumps—for he owned a magnificent pair of tusks; or pulled at the end of a rope—for he had a magnificent pair of shoulders, while Deesa kicked him behind the ears and said he was the king of elephants. At evening time Moti Guj would wash down his three hundred pounds’ weight of green food with a quart of arrack, and Deesa would take a share and sing songs between Moti Guj’s legs till it was time to go to bed. Once a week Deesa led Moti Guj down to the river, and Moti Guj lay on his side luxuriously in the shallows, while Deesa went over him with a coir-swab and a brick. Moti Guj never mistook the pounding blow of the latter for the smack of the former that warned him to get up and turn over on the other side. Then Deesa would look at his feet, and examine his eyes, and turn up the fringes of his mighty ears in case of sores or budding ophthalmia. After inspection, the two would ‘come up with a song from the sea,’ Moti Guj all black and shining, waving a torn tree branch twelve feet long in his trunk, and Deesa knotting up his own long wet hair.

There was no sleeping during the day on the planter’s clearing: the wages were too good to risk it. Deesa sat on Moti Guj’s neck and gave him commands while Moti Guj dug up the stumps—he had a magnificent pair of tusks; or pulled at the end of a rope—he had a magnificent pair of shoulders, while Deesa kicked him behind the ears and called him the king of elephants. In the evening, Moti Guj would wash down his three hundred pounds of green food with a quart of arrack, and Deesa would take a share and sing songs between Moti Guj’s legs until it was time for bed. Once a week, Deesa led Moti Guj down to the river, where Moti Guj would luxuriously lie on his side in the shallows, while Deesa scrubbed him with a coir swab and a brick. Moti Guj never confused the pounding blow of the brick with the smack of the swab that told him to get up and turn to the other side. Then Deesa would check his feet, examine his eyes, and lift the fringes of his big ears for sores or early signs of eye problems. After the inspection, the two would ‘come up with a song from the sea,’ Moti Guj all black and shiny, waving a torn tree branch twelve feet long in his trunk, and Deesa tying up his own long wet hair.

It was a peaceful, well-paid life till Deesa felt the return of the desire to drink deep. He wished for an orgie. The little draughts that led nowhere were taking the manhood out of him.

It was a calm, well-paying life until Deesa felt the urge to drink heavily again. He craved a wild party. The small sips that led to nowhere were draining his masculinity.

He went to the planter, and ‘My mother’s dead,’ said he, weeping.

He went to the planter and said, "My mom's dead," crying.

‘She died on the last plantation two months ago; and she died once before that when you were working for me last year,’ said the planter, who knew something of the ways of nativedom.

‘She died on the last plantation two months ago; and she died once before that when you were working for me last year,’ said the planter, who understood a bit about the ways of the locals.

‘Then it’s my aunt, and she was just the same as a mother to me,’ said Deesa, weeping more than ever. ‘She has left eighteen small children entirely without bread, and it is I who must fill their little stomachs,’ said Deesa, beating his head on the floor.

‘Then it’s my aunt, and she was just like a mother to me,’ said Deesa, crying even harder. ‘She has left eighteen young children completely without food, and it’s up to me to fill their little bellies,’ said Deesa, hitting his head on the floor.

‘Who brought you the news?’ said the planter.

“Who brought you the news?” said the planter.

‘The post’ said Deesa.

"The post," said Deesa.

‘There hasn’t been a post here for the past week. Get back to your lines!’

‘There hasn’t been a post here for the past week. Get back to your lines!’

‘A devastating sickness has fallen on my village, and all my wives are dying,’ yelled Deesa, really in tears this time.

‘A terrible illness has hit my village, and all my wives are dying,’ yelled Deesa, genuinely in tears this time.

‘Call Chihun, who comes from Deesa’s village,’ said the planter.’ Chihun, has this man a wife?’

‘Call Chihun, who comes from Deesa’s village,’ said the planter. ‘Chihun, does this man have a wife?’

‘He!’ said Chihun. ‘No. Not a woman of our village would look at him. They’d sooner marry the elephant.’ Chihun snorted. Deesa wept and bellowed.

‘He!’ said Chihun. ‘No. Not a single woman from our village would look at him. They’d rather marry an elephant.’ Chihun scoffed. Deesa cried and shouted.

‘You will get into a difficulty in a minute,’ said the planter.’ Go back to your work!’

'You'll run into trouble in a minute,' said the planter. 'Go back to your work!'

‘Now I will speak Heaven’s truth’ gulped Deesa, with an inspiration. ‘I haven’t been drunk for two months. I desire to depart in order to get properly drunk afar off and distant from this heavenly plantation. Thus I shall cause no trouble.’

‘Now I’ll speak the truth from Heaven,’ Deesa said with determination. ‘I haven’t been drunk for two months. I want to leave so I can get properly drunk somewhere far away from this heavenly place. That way, I won’t cause any trouble.’

A flickering smile crossed the planter’s face. ‘Deesa,’ said he, ‘you’ve spoken the truth, and I’d give you leave on the spot if anything could be done with Moti Guj while you’re away. You know that he will only obey your orders.’

A flickering smile crossed the planter’s face. ‘Deesa,’ he said, ‘you’ve spoken the truth, and I’d let you go right now if there was anything that could be done with Moti Guj while you’re away. You know he will only follow your orders.’

‘May the Light of the Heavens live forty thousand years. I shall be absent but ten little days. After that, upon my faith and honour and soul, I return. As to the inconsiderable interval, have I the gracious permission of the Heaven-born to call up Moti Guj?’

‘May the Light of the Heavens live for forty thousand years. I will be gone for just ten short days. After that, I promise on my faith, honor, and soul, I will return. As for this brief period, do I have the kind permission of the Heaven-born to summon Moti Guj?’

Permission was granted, and, in answer to Deesa’s shrill yell, the lordly tusker swung out of the shade of a clump of trees where he had been squirting dust over himself till his master should return.

Permission was given, and in response to Deesa’s loud shout, the majestic tusker stepped out from the shade of a group of trees where he had been throwing dust over himself until his owner came back.

‘Light of my heart, Protector of the Drunken, Mountain of Might, give ear,’ said Deesa, standing in front of him.

‘Light of my heart, Protector of the Drunken, Mountain of Might, listen,’ said Deesa, standing in front of him.

Moti Guj gave ear, and saluted with his trunk. ‘I am going away,’ said Deesa.

Moti Guj listened and nodded with his trunk. ‘I’m leaving,’ said Deesa.

Moti Guj’s eyes twinkled. He liked jaunts as well as his master. One could snatch all manner of nice things from the roadside then.

Moti Guj's eyes sparkled. He enjoyed adventures just as much as his master did. That's when you could grab all sorts of nice things from the side of the road.

‘But you, you fubsy old pig, must stay behind and work.’

‘But you, you chubby old pig, have to stay behind and work.’

The twinkle died out as Moti Guj tried to look delighted. He hated stump-hauling on the plantation. It hurt his teeth.

The sparkle faded as Moti Guj forced a smile. He couldn't stand hauling stumps on the plantation. It was painful for his teeth.

‘I shall be gone for ten days, O Delectable One. Hold up your near forefoot and I’ll impress the fact upon it, warty toad of a dried mud-puddle.’ Deesa took a tent-peg and banged Moti Guj ten times on the nails. Moti Guj grunted and shuffled from foot to foot.

‘I’ll be gone for ten days, oh Delightful One. Raise your front foot and I’ll make sure you remember, warty toad of a dried mud puddle.’ Deesa grabbed a tent peg and hit Moti Guj ten times on the hooves. Moti Guj grunted and shifted his weight from foot to foot.

‘Ten days,’ said Deesa, ‘you must work and haul and root trees as Chihun here shall order you. Take up Chihun and set him on your neck!’ Moti Guj curled the tip of his trunk, Chihun put his foot there and was swung on to the neck. Deesa handed Chihun the heavy ankus, the iron elephant-goad.

‘Ten days,’ said Deesa, ‘you need to work and pull and dig up trees as Chihun here tells you. Pick up Chihun and place him on your neck!’ Moti Guj curled the tip of his trunk, Chihun placed his foot there and was swung onto the neck. Deesa handed Chihun the heavy ankus, the iron elephant-goad.

Chihun thumped Moti Guj’s bald head as a paviour thumps a kerbstone.

Chihun hit Moti Guj’s bald head like a worker strikes a paving stone.

Moti Guj trumpeted.

Moti Guj announced.

‘Be still, hog of the backwoods. Chihun’s your mahout for ten days. And now bid me good-bye, beast after mine own heart. Oh, my lord, my king! Jewel of all created elephants, lily of the herd, preserve your honoured health; be virtuous. Adieu!’

‘Be quiet, you wild boar. Chihun will be your handler for ten days. And now say goodbye to me, creature close to my heart. Oh, my lord, my king! Jewel among all elephants, beauty of the herd, take care of yourself; be good. Farewell!’

Moti Guj lapped his trunk round Deesa and swung him into the air twice. That was his way of bidding the man good-bye.

Moti Guj wrapped his trunk around Deesa and tossed him into the air twice. That was his way of saying goodbye to the man.

‘He’ll work now,’ said Dessa to the planter. ‘Have I leave to go?’

‘He’ll start working now,’ Dessa said to the planter. ‘Am I allowed to go?’

The planter nodded, and Deesa dived into the woods. Moti Guj went back to haul stumps.

The planter nodded, and Deesa ran into the woods. Moti Guj went back to pull out stumps.

Chihun was very kind to him, but he felt unhappy and forlorn notwithstanding. Chihun gave him balls of spices, and tickled him under the chin, and Chihun’s little baby cooed to him after work was over, and Chihun’s wife called him a darling; but Moti Guj was a bachelor by instinct, as Deesa was. He did not understand the domestic emotions. He wanted the light of his universe back again—the drink and the drunken slumber, the savage beatings and the savage caresses.

Chihun was really nice to him, but he still felt sad and lonely. Chihun gave him balls of spices and tickled him under the chin, and Chihun’s little baby cooed at him after work was done, and Chihun’s wife called him sweetheart; but Moti Guj was a bachelor by nature, just like Deesa. He didn’t get the feelings of home life. He wanted the bright spark of his life back again—the drinking and the drunken sleep, the wild beatings and the wild affection.

None the less he worked well, and the planter wondered. Deesa had vagabonded along the roads till he met a marriage procession of his own caste and, drinking, dancing, and tippling, had drifted past all knowledge of the lapse of time.

None the less, he worked well, and the planter was curious. Deesa had wandered along the roads until he came across a wedding procession of his own community, and while drinking, dancing, and partying, he lost track of time completely.

The morning of the eleventh day dawned, and there returned no Deesa. Moti Guj was loosed from his ropes for the daily stint. He swung clear, looked round, shrugged his shoulders, and began to walk away, as one having business elsewhere.

The morning of the eleventh day arrived, and there was still no sign of Deesa. Moti Guj was freed from his ropes for the daily task. He swung free, looked around, shrugged his shoulders, and started to walk away, as if he had other things to do.

‘Hi! ho! Come back, you,’ shouted Chihun. ‘Come back, and put me on your neck, Misborn Mountain. Return, Splendour of the Hillsides. Adornment of all India, heave to, or I’ll bang every toe off your fat fore-foot!’

‘Hey! Come back, you,’ shouted Chihun. ‘Come back and put me on your neck, Misborn Mountain. Return, Splendor of the Hillsides. Adornment of all India, stop, or I’ll kick every toe off your big front foot!’

Moti Guj gurgled gently, but did not obey. Chihun ran after him with a rope and caught him up. Moti Guj put his ears forward, and Chihun knew what that meant, though he tried to carry it off with high words.

Moti Guj gurgled softly but didn't listen. Chihun chased after him with a rope and finally caught up. Moti Guj perked up his ears, and Chihun understood what that signaled, even though he tried to act cool about it with grand gestures.

‘None of your nonsense with me,’ said he. ‘To your pickets, Devil-son.’

‘Cut the nonsense with me,’ he said. ‘Get to your pickets, Devil-son.’

‘Hrrump!’ said Moti Guj, and that was all—that and the forebent ears.

‘Hrrump!’ said Moti Guj, and that was it—that and the bent ears.

Moti Guj put his hands in his pockets, chewed a branch for a toothpick, and strolled about the clearing, making jest of the other elephants, who had just set to work.

Moti Guj put his hands in his pockets, chewed on a stick like a toothpick, and walked around the clearing, joking about the other elephants who had just started working.

Chihun reported the state of affairs to the planter, who came out with a dog-whip and cracked it furiously. Moti Guj paid the white man the compliment of charging him nearly a quarter of a mile across the clearing and ‘Hrrumping’ him into the verandah. Then he stood outside the house chuckling to himself, and shaking all over with the fun of it, as an elephant will.

Chihun updated the planter on the situation, who came out wielding a dog whip and snapped it angrily. Moti Guj gave the white man the courtesy of chasing him almost a quarter of a mile across the clearing and then pushing him onto the verandah. After that, he stood outside the house, laughing to himself and shaking with amusement, just like an elephant does.

‘We’ll thrash him,’ said the planter. ‘He shall have the finest thrashing that ever elephant received. Give Kala Nag and Nazim twelve foot of chain apiece, and tell them to lay on twenty blows.’

‘We’ll beat him up,’ said the planter. ‘He’ll get the hardest beating an elephant has ever had. Give Kala Nag and Nazim twelve feet of chain each, and tell them to land twenty hits.’

Kala Nag—which means Black Snake—and Nazim were two of the biggest elephants in the lines, and one of their duties was to administer the graver punishments, since no man can beat an elephant properly.

Kala Nag—which means Black Snake—and Nazim were two of the biggest elephants in the herd, and one of their jobs was to carry out the harsher punishments, since no man can discipline an elephant effectively.

They took the whipping-chains and rattled them in their trunks as they sidled up to Moti Guj, meaning to hustle him between them. Moti Guj had never, in all his life of thirty-nine years, been whipped, and he did not intend to open new experiences. So he waited, weaving his head from right to left, and measuring the precise spot in Kala Nag’s fat side where a blunt tusk would sink deepest. Kala Nag had no tusks; the chain was his badge of authority; but he judged it good to swing wide of Moti Guj at the last minute, and seem to appear as if he had brought out the chain for amusement. Nazim turned round and went home early. He did not feel fighting-fit that morning, and so Moti Guj was left standing alone with his ears cocked.

They took the whipping chains and rattled them in their trunks as they approached Moti Guj, planning to intimidate him. Moti Guj had never, in his thirty-nine years, been whipped, and he wasn’t about to start now. So, he waited, moving his head back and forth, evaluating the best spot on Kala Nag’s thick side where a blunt tusk would have the most impact. Kala Nag didn’t have tusks; the chain was his symbol of power; but he figured it would be better to veer away from Moti Guj at the last second, making it seem like he was just playing with the chain. Nazim turned around and went home early. He didn’t feel up for a fight that morning, so Moti Guj was left standing alone with his ears perked up.

That decided the planter to argue no more, and Moti Guj rolled back to his inspection of the clearing. An elephant who will not work, and is not tied up, is not quite so manageable as an eighty-one ton gun loose in a heavy sea-way. He slapped old friends on the back and asked them if the stumps were coming away easily; he talked nonsense concerning labour and the inalienable rights of elephants to a long ‘nooning’; and, wandering to and fro, thoroughly demoralized the garden till sundown, when he returned to his pickets for food.

That made the planter stop arguing, and Moti Guj went back to checking out the clearing. An elephant that won't work and isn't tied up is not nearly as easy to handle as an eighty-one-ton gun floating loose in rough seas. He slapped his old friends on the back and asked them if the stumps were coming out easily; he talked nonsense about work and the elephants' right to a long break; and, wandering around, he completely messed up the garden until sundown, when he headed back to his area for food.

‘If you won’t work you shan’t eat,’ said Chihun angrily. ‘You’re a wild elephant, and no educated animal at all. Go back to your jungle.’

‘If you won’t work, you won’t eat,’ said Chihun angrily. ‘You’re a wild elephant and not educated at all. Go back to your jungle.’

Chihun’s little brown baby, rolling on the floor of the hut, stretched its fat arms to the huge shadow in the doorway. Moti Guj knew well that it was the dearest thing on earth to Chihun. He swung out his trunk with a fascinating crook at the end, and the brown baby threw itself shouting upon it. Moti Guj made fast and pulled up till the brown baby was crowing in the air twelve feet above his father’s head.

Chihun’s little brown baby, rolling on the floor of the hut, reached its chubby arms toward the large shadow in the doorway. Moti Guj knew it was the most precious thing in the world to Chihun. He swung his trunk with a captivating curve at the end, and the brown baby leaped onto it, shouting with joy. Moti Guj lifted up until the brown baby was laughing in the air twelve feet above his father’s head.

‘Great Chief!’ said Chihun. ‘Flour cakes of the best, twelve in number, two feet across, and soaked in rum shall be yours on the instant, and two hundred pounds’ weight of fresh-cut young sugar-cane therewith. Deign only to put down safely that insignificant brat who is my heart and my life to me.’

‘Great Chief!’ said Chihun. ‘You shall have the finest flour cakes, twelve of them, two feet wide, and soaked in rum, right away, along with two hundred pounds of fresh-cut young sugarcane. Please, just safely set down that little brat who means everything to me.’

Moti Guj tucked the brown baby comfortably between his forefeet, that could have knocked into toothpicks all Chihun’s hut, and waited for his food. He ate it, and the brown baby crawled away. Moti Guj dozed, and thought of Deesa. One of many mysteries connected with the elephant is that his huge body needs less sleep than anything else that lives. Four or five hours in the night suffice—two just before midnight, lying down on one side; two just after one o’clock, lying down on the other. The rest of the silent hours are filled with eating and fidgeting and long grumbling soliloquies.

Moti Guj tucked the brown baby comfortably between his front feet, which could have turned all of Chihun’s hut into toothpicks, and waited for his food. He ate it, and the brown baby crawled away. Moti Guj dozed off and thought about Deesa. One of the many mysteries surrounding the elephant is that his massive body needs less sleep than any other living creature. Four or five hours at night are enough—two just before midnight, lying on one side; two just after one o’clock, lying on the other. The rest of the quiet hours are filled with eating, fidgeting, and long, grumbling monologues.

At midnight, therefore, Moti Guj strode out of his pickets, for a thought had come to him that Deesa might be lying drunk somewhere in the dark forest with none to look after him. So all that night he chased through the undergrowth, blowing and trumpeting and shaking his ears. He went down to the river and blared across the shallows where Deesa used to wash him, but there was no answer. He could not find Deesa, but he disturbed all the elephants in the lines, and nearly frightened to death some gypsies in the woods.

At midnight, Moti Guj stepped out of his enclosure, because he had a thought that Deesa might be lying drunk somewhere in the dark forest with no one to check on him. So all night, he ran through the underbrush, trumpeting and shaking his ears. He went down to the river and trumpeted across the shallows where Deesa used to wash him, but there was no response. He couldn’t find Deesa, but he startled all the elephants in their enclosures and nearly scared some gypsies in the woods to death.

At dawn Deesa returned to the plantation. He had been very drunk indeed, and he expected to fall into trouble for outstaying his leave. He drew a long breath when he saw that the bungalow and the plantation were still uninjured; for he knew something of Moti Guj’s temper; and reported himself with many lies and salaams. Moti Guj had gone to his pickets for breakfast. His night exercise had made him hungry.

At dawn, Deesa came back to the plantation. He had definitely had too much to drink and worried he might get in trouble for staying away too long. He sighed in relief when he saw that the bungalow and the plantation were still intact because he knew how Moti Guj could be. He reported back with a lot of lies and formal greetings. Moti Guj had gone to his post for breakfast since his night activities had made him hungry.

‘Call up your beast,’ said the planter, and Deesa shouted in the mysterious elephant-language, that some mahouts believe came from China at the birth of the world, when elephants and not men were masters. Moti Guj heard and came. Elephants do not gallop. They move from spots at varying rates of speed. If an elephant wished to catch an express train he could not gallop, but he could catch the train. Thus Moti Guj was at the planter’s door almost before Chihun noticed that he had left his pickets. He fell into Deesa’s arms trumpeting with joy, and the man and beast wept and slobbered over each other, and handled each other from head to heel to see that no harm had befallen.

‘Call your elephant,’ said the planter, and Deesa shouted in the mysterious elephant language that some mahouts believe originated in China at the dawn of time, when elephants, not humans, were the rulers. Moti Guj heard and came. Elephants don’t gallop. They move from one place to another at different speeds. If an elephant wanted to catch an express train, he couldn’t gallop, but he could still reach it. So Moti Guj was at the planter’s door almost before Chihun realized he had left his pickets. He fell into Deesa’s arms, trumpeting with joy, and the man and the elephant cried and slobbered over each other, feeling each other from head to toe to make sure no harm had come to them.

‘Now we will get to work,’ said Deesa. ‘Lift me up, my son and my joy.’

‘Now we’re going to get started,’ said Deesa. ‘Pick me up, my son and my joy.’

Moti Guj swung him up and the two went to the coffee-clearing to look for irksome stumps.

Moti Gu

The planter was too astonished to be very angry.

The planter was too shocked to be really angry.





L’ENVOI

   My new-cut ashlar takes the light
     Where crimson-blank the windows flare;
   By my own work, before the night,
    Great Overseer, I make my prayer.

   If there be good in that I wrought,
     Thy hand compelled it, Master, Thine;
   Where I have failed to meet Thy thought
     I know, through Thee, the blame is mine.

   One instant’s toil to Thee denied
     Stands all Eternity’s offence,
   Of that I did with Thee to guide
     To Thee, through Thee, be excellence.

   Who, lest all thought of Eden fade,
     Bring’st Eden to the craftsman’s brain,
   Godlike to muse o’er his own trade
     And Manlike stand with God again.

   The depth and dream of my desire,
     The bitter paths wherein I stray,
   Thou knowest Who hast made the Fire,
     Thou knowest Who hast made the Clay.

   One stone the more swings to her place
     In that dread Temple of Thy Worth
   —It is enough that through Thy grace
     I saw naught common on Thy earth.

   Take not that vision from my ken;
     Oh whatso’er may spoil or speed,
   Help me to need no aid from men
     That I may help such men as need!
   My newly cut stone catches the light  
     Where the crimson-lit windows glow;  
   By my own work, before the night,  
    Great Overseer, I offer my prayer.  

   If there’s anything good in what I’ve made,  
     Your hand must have guided it, Master, Yours;  
   Where I haven’t lived up to Your vision,  
     I know, through You, the fault is mine.  

   A moment's effort denied to You  
     Counts for all of eternity’s blame,  
   For what I did with You to guide  
     To You, through You, be the excellence.  

   Who, so that all memory of Eden doesn’t fade,  
     Brings Eden to the craftsman’s mind,  
   God-like to ponder his own craft  
     And stand with God as a man again.  

   The depth and dream of my desire,  
     The painful paths where I wander,  
   You know, who made the Fire,  
     You know, who made the Clay.  

   One more stone settles into its place  
     In that great Temple of Your Worth—  
   It’s enough that through Your grace  
     I saw nothing ordinary on Your earth.  

   Don’t take that vision from my sight;  
     Regardless of what might ruin or aid,  
   Help me to need no help from others  
     So that I can help those who are in need!







Download ePUB

If you like this ebook, consider a donation!