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THE TRANSFORMATION OF PHILIP JETTAN
GEORGETTE HEYER
Bibliographical Note
Bibliography Note
First publication: Mills & Boon, London, 1923
First publication: Mills & Boon, London, 1923
The original edition was published with the subtitle
A Comedy of Manners,
and the author used the pseudonym Stella Martin.
The book was later published as Powder and Patch,
with Chapter Twenty deleted.
The original edition was published with the subtitle
A Comedy of Manners,
and the author used the pen name Stella Martin.
The book was later released as Powder and Patch,
with Chapter Twenty removed.
ContentsContents
One One | The House of Jettan |
Two Two | In Which Is Presented Mistress Cleone Charteris |
Three Three | Mr. Bancroft Brings Trouble into Little Fittledean |
Four Four | The Trouble Comes to a Head |
Five Five | In Which Philip Finds That His Uncle Is More Sympathetic Than His Father |
Six Six | The Beginning of the Transformation |
Seven Seven | Mr. Bancroft Comes to Paris and Is Annoyed |
Eight 8 | In Which Philip Delivers Himself of a Rondeau |
Nine 9 | Mr. Bancroft Is Enraged |
Ten 10 | In Which a Letter Is Read |
Eleven 11 | Philip Astonishes His Uncle |
Twelve 12 | Philip Plays a Dangerous Game |
Thirteen Thirteen | Sir Maurice Comes to Town |
Fourteen 14 | The Strange Behaviour of Mistress Cleone |
Fifteen Fifteen | Lady Malmerstoke on Husbands |
Sixteen 16 | Mistress Cleone Finds There Is No Safety in Numbers |
Seventeen Seventeen | Mistress Cleone at Her Wits' End |
Eighteen Eighteen | Philip Takes Charge of the Situation |
Nineteen Nineteen | Philip Justifies His Chin |
Twenty Twenty | Mademoiselle de Chaucheron Rings Down the Curtain |
OneOne
The House of JettanThe Jettan House
If you searched among the Downs in Sussex, somewhere between Midhurst and Brighthelmstone, inland a little, and nestling in modest seclusion between two waves of hills, you would find Little Fittledean, a village round which three gentlemen had built their homes. One chose the north side, half a mile away, and on the slope of the Downs. He was Mr. Winton, a dull man with no wife, but two children, James and Jennifer. The second built his house west of the village, not far from the London Road and Great Fittledean. He was one Sir Thomas Jettan. He chose his site carefully, beside a wood, and laid out gardens after the Dutch style. That was way back in the last century when Charles the Second was King, and what had then been a glaring white erection, stark-naked and blatant in its sylvan setting, was now, some seventy years later, a fair place, creeper-hung, and made kindly by the passing of the years. The Jettan who built it became inordinately proud of the house. Never a day passed but he would strut round the grounds, looking at the nude structure from a hundred different points of vantage. It was to be the country seat of the Jettans in their old age; they were to think of it almost as they would think of their children. It was never to be sold; it was to pass from father to son and from son to grandson through countless ages. Nor must it accrue to a female heir, be she never so direct, for old Tom determined that the name of Jettan should always be associated with the house.
If you searched through the Downs in Sussex, somewhere between Midhurst and Brighton, a bit inland and nestled in quiet seclusion between two hills, you would find Little Fittledean, a village where three gentlemen built their homes. One chose the north side, half a mile away, on the slope of the Downs. He was Mr. Winton, a dull man with no wife, but two children, James and Jennifer. The second built his house west of the village, not far from the London Road and Great Fittledean. He was Sir Thomas Jettan. He carefully selected his location next to a wood and designed gardens in the Dutch style. This was back in the last century when Charles the Second was king, and what was once a glaring white structure, stark and conspicuous in its wooded setting, had become, about seventy years later, a lovely place, covered in vines, and softened by time. The Jettan who built it grew very proud of the house. Not a day went by without him strolling around the grounds, admiring the bare structure from a hundred different angles. It was meant to be the family seat for the Jettans in their old age; they were to regard it almost like their children. It was never to be sold; it was to pass from father to son and from son to grandson for generations. Nor was it to go to a female heir, no matter how direct, because old Tom was determined that the Jettan name would always be linked with the house.
Old Tom propounded these notions to the whole countryside. All his friends and his acquaintances were shown the white house and told the tale of its owner's past misdemeanours and his present virtue—a virtue due, he assured them, to the possession of so fair an estate. No more would he pursue the butterfly existence that all his ancestors had pursued before him. This house was his anchor and his interest; he would rear his two sons to reverence it, and it might even be that the tradition which held every Jettan to be a wild fellow at heart should be broken at last.
Old Tom shared these ideas with everyone in the countryside. All his friends and acquaintances were taken to see the white house and heard the story about its owner's past mistakes and his current goodness—a goodness he claimed was thanks to owning such a beautiful estate. He would no longer live the carefree life that all his ancestors had before him. This house was his foundation and focus; he would teach his two sons to respect it, and perhaps in time, the tradition of every Jettan being a wild spirit would finally come to an end.
The neighbours laughed behind their hands at old Tom's childishness. They dubbed the hitherto unnamed house "Tom's Pride," in good-humoured raillery.
The neighbors laughed behind their hands at old Tom's childishness. They called the previously unnamed house "Tom's Pride," in good-natured teasing.
Tom Jettan was busy thinking out a suitable name for his home when the countryside's nickname came to his ears. He was not without humour in spite of his vanity, and when the sobriquet had sunk into his brain, he chuckled deep in his chest, and slapped his knee in appreciation. Not a month later the neighbours were horrified to find, cunningly inserted in the wrought-iron gates of the white house, a gilded scroll bearing the legend, "Jettan's Pride." No little apprehension was felt amongst them at having their secret joke thus discovered and utilised, and those who next waited on Tom did so with an air of ashamed nervousness. But Tom soon made it clear that, far from being offended, he was grateful to them for finding an appropriate name for his home.
Tom Jettan was occupied brainstorming a fitting name for his house when he overheard the countryside's nickname. Despite his vanity, he had a sense of humor, and once the nickname settled in his mind, he laughed heartily and slapped his knee in delight. Less than a month later, the neighbors were shocked to see a gilded scroll cleverly placed in the wrought-iron gates of the white house, reading "Jettan's Pride." They felt quite uneasy about having their private joke exposed and used this way, and those who visited Tom next did so with a nervous, embarrassed attitude. However, Tom quickly made it clear that, rather than being upset, he was thankful to them for coming up with a perfect name for his home.
His hopeful prophecy concerning the breaking of tradition was not realised in either of his sons. The elder, Maurice, sowed all the wild oats of which he was capable before taking up his abode at the Pride; the other, Thomas, never ceased sowing wild oats, and showed no love for the house whatsoever.
His optimistic prediction about breaking tradition didn't happen with either of his sons. The older one, Maurice, lived a wild lifestyle before settling down at the Pride; the younger one, Thomas, kept living carelessly and showed no interest in the house at all.
When old Tom died he left a will which gave Maurice to understand that if, by the time he was fifty years of age, he still refused to settle down at the Pride, it was to pass to his brother and his brother's heirs.
When old Tom died, he left a will that made it clear to Maurice that if he still hadn’t settled down at the Pride by the time he turned fifty, it would go to his brother and his brother's heirs.
Thomas counselled Maurice to marry and produce some children.
Thomas advised Maurice to get married and have some kids.
"For damme if I do, my boy! The old man must have lost his faculties to expect a Jettan to live in this hole! I tell ye flat, Maurice, I'll not have the place. 'Tis you who are the elder, and you must assume the—the responsibilities!" At that he fell a-chuckling, for he was an irrepressible scamp.
"For damn if I do, my boy! The old man must have lost his mind to think a Jettan could live in this dump! I’m telling you straight, Maurice, I won’t have the place. You’re the older one, so you have to take on the—the responsibilities!" At that, he started chuckling, because he was an uncontrollable rascal.
"Certainly I shall live here," answered Maurice. "Three months here, and nine months—not here. What's to stop me?"
"Of course I'll live here," replied Maurice. "Three months here, and nine months—elsewhere. What’s stopping me?"
"Does the will allow it?" asked Tom doubtfully.
"Does the will allow it?" Tom asked uncertainly.
"It does not forbid it. And I shall get me a wife."
"It doesn’t forbid it. And I’m going to get a wife."
At that Tom burst out laughing, but checked himself hurriedly as he met his brother's reproving eye.
At that, Tom burst out laughing but quickly composed himself when he met his brother's disapproving gaze.
"God save us, and the old gentleman but three days dead! Not that I meant any disrespect, y'know. Faith, the old man 'ud be the first to laugh with me, stap me if he wouldn't!" He stifled another laugh, and shrugged his shoulders. "Or he would before he went crazy-pious over this devilish great barn of a house. You'll never have the money to keep it, Maurry," he added cheerfully, "let alone a wife."
"God help us, and the old guy has only been dead for three days! Not that I meant any disrespect, you know. Honestly, the old man would be the first to laugh with me, I swear he would!" He suppressed another laugh and shrugged his shoulders. "Or he would before he got all crazy-religious about this huge barn of a house. You'll never have the money to maintain it, Maurry," he added cheerfully, "let alone a wife."
Maurice twirled his eyeglass, frowning.
Maurice spun his glasses, frowning.
"My father has left even more than I expected," he said.
"My dad has left even more than I thought," he said.
"Oh ay! But it'll be gone after a week's play! God ha' mercy, Maurry, do ye hope to husband it?"
"Oh yeah! But it'll be gone after a week of playing! God have mercy, Maurry, do you think you can save it?"
"Nay, I hope to husband a wife. The rest I'll leave to her."
"No, I hope to take care of a wife. The rest I'll leave to her."
Tom came heavily to his feet. He stared at his brother, round-eyed.
Tom stood up with a lot of effort. He looked at his brother, eyes wide.
"Blister me, but I believe the place is turning you like the old gentleman! Now, Maurry, Maurry, stiffen your back, man!"
"Blister me, but I think this place is changing you like the old guy! Now, Maurry, Maurry, stand tall, man!"
Maurice smiled.
Maurice grinned.
"It'll take more than the Pride to reform me, Tom. I'm thinking that the place is too good to sell or throw away."
"It'll take more than just Pride to change me, Tom. I feel like this place is too good to sell or just get rid of."
"If I could lay my hand on two thousand guineas," said Tom, "anyone could have the Pride for me!"
"If I could get my hands on two thousand guineas," said Tom, "anyone could have the Pride for me!"
Maurice looked up quickly.
Maurice glanced up quickly.
"Why, Tom, all I've got's yours, you know very well! Take what you want—two thousand or twenty."
"Come on, Tom, everything I have is yours, you know that! Take whatever you want—two thousand or twenty."
"Devilish good of you, Maurry, but I'll not sponge on you yet. No, don't start to argue with me, for my head's not strong enough what with one thing and another. Tell me more of this wife of yours. Who is it to be?"
"Really kind of you, Maurry, but I won’t take advantage of you just yet. No, don’t start arguing with me, because my head isn’t strong enough with everything going on. Tell me more about this wife of yours. Who is she?"
"I haven't decided," replied Maurice. He yawned slightly. "There are so many to choose from."
"I don't know yet," replied Maurice. He yawned a bit. "There are just so many options."
"Ay—you're an attractive devil—'pon my word you are! What d'ye say to Lucy Farmer?"
"Ay—you’re a charming devil—I swear you are! What do you think about Lucy Farmer?"
Maurice shuddered.
Maurice felt a shiver.
"Spare me. I had thought of Marianne Tempest."
"Come on. I was thinking about Marianne Tempest."
"What, old Castlehill's daughter? She'd kill you in a month, lad."
"What, Castlehill's daughter? She'd take you out in a month, dude."
"But she is not—dowerless."
"But she isn't dowerless."
"No. But think of it, Maurry! Think of it! A shrew at twenty!"
"No. But just think about it, Maurry! Think about it! A shrew at twenty!"
"Then what do you think of Jane Butterfield?"
"Then what do you think about Jane Butterfield?"
Thomas pulled at his lip, irresolute.
Thomas tugged at his lip, uncertain.
"I'm not decrying the girl, Maurice, but Lord! could you live with her?"
"I'm not criticizing the girl, Maurice, but wow! could you actually live with her?"
"I've not essayed it," answered Maurice.
"I haven't tried it," Maurice replied.
"No, and marriage is so damned final! 'Tisn't as though ye could live together for a month or so before ye made up your minds. I doubt the girl would not consent to that."
"No, and marriage is so damn final! It's not like you could live together for a month or so before you made up your minds. I doubt the girl would agree to that."
"And if she did consent, one would not desire to wed her," remarked Maurice. "A pity. No, I believe I could not live with Jane."
"And if she did agree, no one would really want to marry her," Maurice said. "What a shame. No, I don't think I could live with Jane."
Thomas sat down again.
Thomas sat back down.
"The truth of it is, Maurry, we Jettans must marry for love. There's not one of us ever married without it, whether for money or no."
"The truth is, Maurry, we Jettans have to marry for love. None of us has ever married without it, whether for money or not."
"'Tis so unfashionable," objected Maurice. "One marries for convenience. One may have fifty different loves."
"'It's so out of style," Maurice argued. "People marry for convenience. You can have fifty different loves."
"What! All at once? I think you'd find that a trifle inconvenient, Maurry! Lord! just fancy fifty loves, oh, the devil! And three's enough to drive one crazed, bruise me if 'tis not."
"What! All at once? I think you'd find that a bit inconvenient, Maurry! Wow! Just imagine fifty loves, oh man! And three is enough to drive someone crazy, believe me if it’s not."
Maurice's thin lips twitched responsively.
Maurice's thin lips twitched in response.
"Gad no! Fifty loves spread over a lifetime, and you're not bound to one of them. There's bliss, Tom, you rogue!"
"Gosh no! Fifty loves throughout your life, and you're not tied to any of them. There's happiness, Tom, you rascal!"
Thomas shook a wise finger at him, his plump, good-humoured face solemn all at once.
Thomas shook a wise finger at him, his chubby, cheerful face suddenly serious.
"And not one of them's the true love, Maurry. For if she were, faith, she'd not be one of fifty! Now, you take my advice, lad, and wait. Damme, we'll not spoil the family record!
"And not one of them is the true love, Maurry. Because if she were, honestly, she wouldn’t be one of fifty! Now, you take my advice, kid, and wait. Damn, we won't ruin the family record!"
"I don't know that it's true about the staid old age, though. Maybe 'tis only those who wed for love who acquire virtue. Anyway, you'll not break the second maxim, Maurry."
"I don't know if it's really true about boring old age, though. Maybe it's just those who marry for love who gain virtue. Anyway, you won't break the second rule, Maurry."
"Oh?" smiled Maurice. "What's to prevent me?"
"Oh?" Maurice smiled. "What's stopping me?"
Thomas had risen again. Now he slipped his arm in his brother's.
Thomas had gotten up again. Now he linked his arm with his brother's.
"If it comes to prevention, old sobersides, I'm game. I'll make an uproar in the church and carry off the bride. Gad, but 'twould be amusing! Carry off one's brother's bride, under his stern nose. Devil take it, Maurry, that's just what your nose is! I never thought on't before—stern, grim, old—now, steady, Tom, my boy, or you'll be laughing again with the old gentleman not yet underground!"
"If it comes to preventing this, old stick-in-the-mud, I'm all for it. I'll cause a scene in the church and take the bride away. Wow, that would be hilarious! To take my brother's bride right in front of him. Damn, Maurry, that's exactly what your face looks like! I never realized it before—serious, grumpy, old—now, hold on, Tom, my friend, or you'll be laughing again before the old man is even in the ground!"
Maurice waited for his brother's mirth to abate.
Maurice waited for his brother's laughter to die down.
"But, Tom, 'tis very well for you to counsel me not to wed without love! I must marry, for 'tis certain you'll not, and we must have heirs. What's to be done, I'd like to know?"
"But, Tom, it's easy for you to tell me not to marry without love! I have to get married because it's clear you won't, and we need to have heirs. What should I do, I'd like to know?"
"Wait, lad, wait! You're not so old that you can't afford to hold back yet awhile."
"Wait, kid, wait! You're not so old that you can't afford to hold back for a bit longer."
"I'm thirty-five, Tom."
"I'm 35, Tom."
"Then you have fifteen years to run before you need settle down. Take my advice, and wait!"
"Then you have fifteen years to go before you need to settle down. Take my advice, and wait!"
The end of it was that Maurice did wait. For four years he continued to rove through Europe, amusing himself in the usual way of gentlemen of his day, but in 1729 he wrote a long letter from Paris to his brother in London, declaring himself in love, and the lady an angel of goodness, sweetness, amiability, and affection. He said much more in this vein, all of which Tom had to read, yawning and chuckling by turns. The lady was one Maria Marchant. She brought with her a fair dowry and a placid disposition. So Tom wrote off to Maurice at once, congratulating him, and bestowing his blessing on the alliance. He desired his dear old Maurry to quit travelling, and to come home to his affectionate brother Tom.
The conclusion was that Maurice did wait. For four years, he traveled around Europe, entertaining himself in the usual way that gentlemen did at the time, but in 1729, he wrote a long letter from Paris to his brother in London, confessing that he was in love and describing the lady as an angel of goodness, sweetness, kindness, and affection. He said a lot more along those lines, all of which Tom had to read while yawning and laughing at the same time. The lady was one Maria Marchant. She came with a good dowry and a calm personality. So, Tom immediately wrote to Maurice, congratulating him and giving his blessing for the relationship. He urged his dear old Maurry to stop traveling and come home to his caring brother Tom.
In a postscript he added that he dropped five hundred guineas at Newmarket, only to win fifteen hundred at dice the very next week, so that had it not been for his plaguey ill-luck in the matter of a small wager with Harry Besham, he would to-day be the most care-free of mortals, instead of a jaded creature, creeping about in terror of the bailiffs from hour to hour.
In a postscript, he added that he lost five hundred guineas at Newmarket, only to win fifteen hundred at dice the very next week, so if it hadn't been for his terrible bad luck with a small bet with Harry Besham, he would be the most carefree person today, instead of a worn-out soul, constantly living in fear of the bailiffs every hour.
After that there was no more correspondence. Neither brother felt that there was anything further to be said, and they were not men to waste their time writing to one another for no urgent matter. Thomas thought very little more about Maurice's marriage. He supposed that the wedding would take place in England before many months had gone by; possibly Maurice would see fit to return at once, as he, Tom, had suggested. In the meantime, there was nothing to be done. Tom laid his brother's letter aside, and went on with his ordinary occupations.
After that, there was no more communication. Neither brother felt there was anything else to discuss, and they weren’t the type to waste time writing to each other unless it was important. Thomas didn’t think much more about Maurice's marriage. He figured the wedding would happen in England before long; maybe Maurice would decide to come back right away, as Tom had suggested. In the meantime, there was nothing to do. Tom set his brother’s letter aside and continued with his usual activities.
He lived in Half-Moon Street. His house was ruled by his cook, the wife of Moggat, his valet-footman. She also ruled the hapless Moggat. Moggat retaliated by ruling his jovial master as far as he was able, so one might really say Mrs. Moggat ruled them all. As Tom was quite unaware of this fact, it troubled him not a whit.
He lived on Half-Moon Street. His household was run by his cook, Moggat's wife, who was also the valet-footman. She also had control over the unfortunate Moggat. Moggat got back at her by taking charge of his cheerful master as much as he could, so you could really say Mrs. Moggat ran the whole show. Since Tom was completely oblivious to this, it didn’t bother him at all.
A month after he had answered his brother's letter, Tom was disturbed one morning while he sipped his chocolate with the news that a gentleman wished to speak to him. Tom was in his bed-chamber, his round person swathed in a silken wrapper of astonishing brightness. He had not yet doffed his nightcap, and his wig lay on the dressing-table.
A month after he replied to his brother’s letter, Tom was surprised one morning while he was enjoying his hot chocolate by the news that a man wanted to talk to him. Tom was in his bedroom, his plump figure wrapped in a bright silk robe. He hadn’t taken off his nightcap yet, and his wig was on the dressing table.
The lean, long Moggat crept in at the door, which he seemed hardly to open, and ahem'd directly behind his master.
The tall, slender Moggat sneaked in through the door, hardly even opening it, and cleared his throat right behind his boss.
Tom was in the act of swallowing his chocolate, and as he had not heard Moggat's slithering approach, the violent clearing of that worthy's throat startled him not a little, and he choked.
Tom was in the process of swallowing his chocolate, and since he hadn't heard Moggat's sneaky approach, the sudden clearing of Moggat's throat startled him quite a bit, causing him to choke.
Tenderly solicitous, Moggat patted him on the back until the coughs and splutters had abated. Tom bounced round in his chair to face the man.
Tenderly caring, Moggat patted him on the back until the coughs and splutters stopped. Tom turned around in his chair to face the man.
"Damn and curse it, Moggat! What d'ye mean by it? What d'ye mean by it, I say? Crawling into a room to make a noise at me just as I'm drinking! Yes, sir! Just as I'm drinking! Devil take you! D'ye hear me? Devil take you!"
"Damn it, Moggat! What do you mean by this? What do you mean by this, I ask? Crawling into a room to make noise at me just as I'm trying to drink! Yes, sir! Just as I'm trying to drink! Hell take you! Do you hear me? Hell take you!"
Moggat listened in mournful silence. When Tom ceased for want of breath, he bowed, and continued as though there had been no interruption.
Moggat listened in sad silence. When Tom paused to catch his breath, he bowed and carried on as if there hadn’t been any break.
"There is a gentleman below, sir, as desires to have speech with you."
"There’s a guy down here who wants to talk to you, sir."
"A gentleman? Don't you know that gentlemen don't come calling at this hour, ye ninny-pated jackass? Bring me some more chocolate!"
"A gentleman? Don’t you realize that gentlemen don’t show up at this hour, you clueless idiot? Bring me more chocolate!"
"Yes, sir, a gentleman."
"Yes, sir, a gentleman."
"I tell you no gentleman would disturb another at this hour! Have done now, Moggat!"
"I tell you no gentleman would interrupt another at this hour! Enough now, Moggat!"
"And although I told the gentleman, sir, as how my master was not yet robed and accordingly could not see any visitors, he said it was of no consequence to him whatsoever, and he would be obliged to you to ask him upstairs at once, sir. So I—"
"And even though I told the guy that my boss wasn't dressed yet and couldn't see anyone, he said it didn’t matter to him at all and would appreciate it if you could take him upstairs right away. So I—"
"Confound his impudence!" growled Tom. "What's his name?"
"Curse his arrogance!" Tom grumbled. "What's his name?"
"The gentleman, sir, on my asking what name I was to tell you, gave me to understand that it was of no matter."
"The gentleman, sir, when I asked what name I should tell you, made it clear that it didn’t matter."
"Devil take him! Show him out, Moggat! Like as not 'tis one of these cursed bailiffs. Why, you fool, what d'ye mean by letting him in?"
"To hell with him! Show him out, Moggat! It's probably one of those damn bailiffs. What were you thinking, letting him in?"
Moggat sighed in patient resignation.
Moggat sighed in quiet acceptance.
"If you will allow me to say so, sir, this gentleman is not a bailiff."
"If you don’t mind me saying, sir, this guy is not a bailiff."
"Well, who is he?"
"Well, who is this guy?"
"I regret, sir, I do not know."
"I’m sorry, sir, I don’t know."
"You're a fool! What's this fellow like?"
"You're an idiot! What's this guy like?"
"The gentleman"—Moggat laid ever so little stress on the word—"is tall, sir, and—er—slim. He is somewhat dark as regards eyes and brows, and he is dressed, if I may say so, exceedingly modishly, with a point-edged hat, and very full-skirted puce coat, laced, French fashion, with—"
"The gentleman"—Moggat put just a touch of emphasis on the word—"is tall, sir, and—uh—slim. He has somewhat dark eyes and brows, and he's dressed, if I may say so, very stylishly, with a pointed hat and a very full, puce coat, laced in the French style, with—"
Tom snatched his nightcap off and threw it at Moggat.
Tom took off his nightcap and threw it at Moggat.
"Numskull! D'ye think I want a list of his clothes? Show him out, the swarthy rogue! Show him out!"
"Idiot! Do you think I want a list of his clothes? Get him out of here, the shady guy! Get him out!"
Moggat picked up the nightcap, and smoothed it sadly.
Moggat picked up the nightcap and looked at it sadly.
"The gentleman seems anxious to see you, sir."
"The guy seems eager to see you, sir."
"Ay! Trying to dun me, the rascal! Don't I know it! Blustering and—"
"Ay! Trying to collect from me, that rascal! Don't I know it! Blustering and—"
"No, sir," said Moggat firmly. "I could not truthfully say that the gentleman blustered. Indeed, sir, if I may say so, I think him a singularly quiet, cool gentleman. Very soft-spoken, sir—oh, very soft-spoken!"
"No, sir," Moggat said confidently. "I can't honestly say that the man was blustering. In fact, if I may point out, I find him to be quite a calm and composed gentleman. Very soft-spoken, sir—oh, definitely very soft-spoken!"
"Take him away!" shouted Tom. "I tell you I'll not be pestered at this hour! I might be asleep, damme! Tell the fellow to come again at a godly time—not at dawn! Now, don't try to argue, Moggat! I tell you, if it were my brother himself, I'd not see him!"
"Get him out of here!" yelled Tom. "I'm telling you, I won't be bothered at this hour! I could be sleeping, for crying out loud! Tell the guy to come back at a decent time—not at dawn! Now, don’t even try to argue, Moggat! I’m serious, even if it were my own brother, I wouldn’t see him!"
Moggat bowed again.
Moggat bowed once more.
"I will hinform the gentleman, sir."
"I will inform the gentleman, sir."
When the door closed behind Moggat, Tom leaned back in his chair and picked up one of his letters. Not five minutes later the door creaked again. Tom turned, to find Moggat at his elbow.
When the door shut behind Moggat, Tom reclined in his chair and grabbed one of his letters. Not five minutes later, the door creaked open again. Tom turned to see Moggat standing right next to him.
"Eh? What d'ye want?"
"Eh? What do you want?"
"Hif you please, sir, the gentleman says as how he is your brother," said Moggat gently.
"If you please, sir, the gentleman says that he is your brother," said Moggat gently.
Tom jumped as though he had been shot.
Tom jumped as if he had been shot.
"What? My brother? What d'ye mean? My brother?"
"What? My brother? What do you mean? My brother?"
"Sir Maurice, sir."
"Sir Maurice."
Up flew Tom, catching at his wig and cramming it on his head all awry.
Up flew Tom, grabbing his wig and shoving it on his head all crooked.
"Thunder an' turf! Maurry! Here, you raving wooden-pate! How dare you leave my brother downstairs? How dare you, I say?" He wrapped himself more tightly in his robe than ever, and dashed headlong out of the room, down the stairs to where Maurice awaited him.
"Thunder and turf! Maurry! You crazy wooden-head! How could you leave my brother downstairs? How could you, I ask?" He wrapped himself even tighter in his robe and rushed out of the room, down the stairs to where Maurice was waiting for him.
Sir Maurice was standing by the window in the library, drumming his fingers on the sill. At his brother's tempestuous entrance he turned and bowed.
Sir Maurice was standing by the window in the library, tapping his fingers on the sill. When his brother burst in dramatically, he turned and nodded.
"A nice welcome you give me, Tom! 'Tell him to come again at a godly time—I'd not see him if 'twere my brother himself,' forsooth!"
"A great welcome you give me, Tom! 'Tell him to come back at a reasonable time—I wouldn’t want to see him even if it were my own brother,' seriously!"
Thomas hopped across the room and seized both Maurice's long, thin hands in his plump, chubby ones.
Thomas jumped across the room and grabbed both of Maurice's long, thin hands in his round, chubby ones.
"My dear Maurry! My dear old fellow! I'd no notion 'twas you! My dolt of a lackey—but there! When did you arrive in England?"
"My dear Maurry! My dear old friend! I had no idea it was you! My foolish servant—but anyway! When did you get to England?"
"A week ago. I have been at the Pride."
"A week ago, I was at Pride."
"A week? What a plague d'ye mean by not coming to me till now, ye rogue?" As he spoke, Tom thrust Maurice into a chair, and himself sat down opposite him, beaming with pleasure.
"A week? What do you mean by not coming to see me until now, you scoundrel?" While saying this, Tom pushed Maurice into a chair and sat down across from him, looking very pleased.
Maurice leaned back, crossing his legs. A little smile flickered across his mouth, but his eyes were solemn as he answered.
Maurice leaned back, crossing his legs. A small smile flickered across his lips, but his eyes were serious as he replied.
"I had first to see my wife installed in her new home," he said.
"I first needed to see my wife settled into her new home," he said.
For a moment Tom stared at him.
For a moment, Tom looked at him.
"Wife? Tare an' 'ouns, ye don't waste your time! Where and when did you marry the lady?"
"Wife? Come on, don't waste your time! Where and when did you marry her?"
"Three weeks ago, at Paris. Now I have come home to fulfil the last part of the Jettan adage."
"Three weeks ago, in Paris. Now I’ve come home to complete the final part of the Jettan saying."
"God ha' mercy!" ejaculated Thomas. "Not a staid old age, lad! Not you?"
"God have mercy!" exclaimed Thomas. "Not a dull old age, kid! Not you?"
"Something like it," nodded Maurice. "Wait till you have seen my wife!"
"Something like that," nodded Maurice. "Just wait until you meet my wife!"
"Ay, I'm waiting," said Tom. "What's to do now, then? The country squire, and half a dozen children?"
"Ay, I'm waiting," said Tom. "What’s next, then? The country squire and a bunch of kids?"
The grey eyes twinkled.
The gray eyes sparkled.
"Tom, I'll thank you not to be so coarse."
"Tom, I’d appreciate it if you could be a bit more respectful."
"Coarse? Coarse? Gad, Maurice, what's come over you?"
"Coarse? Coarse? Wow, Maurice, what’s wrong with you?"
"I am a married man," replied Maurice. "As such I have—er—learned to guard my tongue. My wife—"
"I’m a married man," Maurice replied. "Because of that, I’ve learned to watch what I say. My wife—"
"Maurry, couldn't ye call the lady by her name?" begged Tom. "Faith, I can't bear those two words so often, proud though ye may be of them."
"Maurry, can't you just call the lady by her name?" Tom pleaded. "Honestly, I can't stand hearing those two words so much, no matter how proud you might be of them."
Maurice flushed slightly and smiled.
Maurice blushed a little and smiled.
"Maria, then. She is a very—sweet, delicate lady."
"Maria, then. She is a very sweet, delicate woman."
"Lord! I'd made up my mind you'd wed a bold, strapping wench with a saucy smile, Maurry!"
"Wow! I thought for sure you'd marry a confident, strong woman with a cheeky smile, Maurry!"
"I? Good God, no! My w—Maria is gentle, and meek, and—"
"I? Good God, no! My wife—Maria is gentle, and meek, and—"
"Ay, ay, Maurry, I know!" hastily interrupted Thomas. "I must see her for myself, so don't spoil the surprise for me, there's a good fellow! Now have you breakfasted? No? Then come upstairs with me. Where's that rascal Moggat? Moggat! Moggat! Ah, there you are! Go and prepare breakfast at once, man! And bring some more chocolate to my room." He wrapped the voluminous robe about him once more, and, seizing his brother by the arm, led him forth to the staircase.
"Yeah, yeah, Maurry, I get it!" Thomas quickly interrupted. "I need to see her myself, so please don’t ruin the surprise for me, okay? Now, have you had breakfast? No? Then come upstairs with me. Where's that troublemaker Moggat? Moggat! Moggat! Ah, there you are! Go and get breakfast ready right now! And bring some more chocolate to my room." He wrapped the huge robe around himself again and, grabbing his brother by the arm, led him toward the staircase.
Thus it was that Maurice Jettan brought home his bride. She was a gentle lady, with a sweet disposition; she adored her handsome husband, and duly presented him with a son, Philip. When the babe was shown to him, Tom discovered that he was a true Jettan, with all their characteristics. His father confessed that he saw no resemblance either to himself or to anyone, but he was nevertheless gratified by his brother's remarks. Tom chuckled mightily and prophesied that young Philip would prove himself a Jettan in more ways than one. He hinted at a youth which should surpass his father's in brilliancy, and Maurice smiled, looking proudly down at the red, crumpled face.
Thus it was that Maurice Jettan brought home his bride. She was a kind lady with a sweet nature; she adored her handsome husband and soon gave birth to a son, Philip. When the baby was shown to him, Tom realized that he was a true Jettan, with all their traits. His father admitted that he saw no resemblance to himself or anyone else, but he was still pleased by his brother's comments. Tom laughed heartily and predicted that young Philip would prove himself a Jettan in more ways than one. He suggested that the youth would outshine his father's brilliance, and Maurice smiled, looking down proudly at the red, wrinkled face.
"And," concluded Tom, "he'll have a papa who can advise him in all matters of fashion better than any man I know. Why, Maurice, you will show him the fashionable world! You must take care you do not stagnate here. You must not fall out of Society."
"And," Tom concluded, "he'll have a dad who can guide him in all things fashion better than anyone I know. Come on, Maurice, you'll show him the stylish world! You have to make sure you don't get stuck here. You can't drift away from Society."
Maurice was still smiling down at his offspring.
Maurice was still smiling down at his child.
"No. I must not fall out, Tom. The youngster will need me later on."
"No. I can’t lose it, Tom. The kid will need me later."
For five years he continued to take his place in London Society, but he found that the desire for excitement and gaiety was growing less and less within him. The death of Maria gave this desire the coup de grâce. Maurice took his small son down to the Pride as soon as he had recovered from the first shock of bereavement, and after that for some years he rarely visited London, except sometimes to see his brother or his tailor. Then he seemed to grow restless again, and started to spend more time with Tom. Bit by bit he re-entered the world he had quitted, yet never did he give himself up to it as once he had done. The Pride seemed to call him, and little Philip held his heart with both hands. Thereafter he spent his time between London and the Pride. When he felt restless, he packed his bags and flitted either to London or to Paris; when the restlessness had passed, back he came to the Pride, there to spend two or three peaceful months.
For five years, he kept his place in London Society, but he noticed that his need for excitement and fun was fading. The death of Maria put an end to that desire completely. After he got over the initial shock of losing her, Maurice took his young son down to the Pride, and for a while, he barely went to London, only doing so occasionally to see his brother or tailor. Eventually, he started feeling restless again and began hanging out more with Tom. Slowly, he re-entered the world he had left behind, but he never fully immersed himself in it like he used to. The Pride seemed to call to him, and little Philip had captured his heart completely. From then on, he split his time between London and the Pride. When he felt antsy, he would pack his bags and head to either London or Paris; once the restlessness faded, he would return to the Pride to spend two or three months in peace.
When Philip was eighteen, he took him to London. Philip was very thoroughly bored. Sir Maurice concluded that he was too young to be introduced into Society, and he sent him back to the country, thinking that in two or three years' time the lad would be only too anxious to leave it.
When Philip turned eighteen, he took him to London. Philip was extremely bored. Sir Maurice decided that he was too young to be introduced to Society, so he sent him back to the country, believing that in two or three years, the young man would be more than ready to leave it.
But the years slipped by, and Philip showed no desire to follow in his father's footsteps. He refused to go on the Grand Tour; he cared nothing for Dress or Fashionable Manners; he despised the life of Courts; he preferred to remain in the country, usurping, to a great extent, his father's position as squire. He was now some twenty-three years old, tall and handsome, but, as his father told his uncle, "an unpolished cub."
But the years went by, and Philip had no interest in following in his father's footsteps. He refused to go on the Grand Tour; he didn't care at all about fashion or fashionable manners; he looked down on court life; he preferred to stay in the countryside, largely taking over his father's role as squire. He was now about twenty-three years old, tall and handsome, but, as his father told his uncle, "an unrefined young man."
TwoTwo
In Which Is Presented Mistress Cleone CharterisPresenting Mistress Cleone Charteris
A while back I spoke of three gentlemen who built their homes round Little Fittledean. Of one I said but little, of the second I spoke at length and to the tune of one whole chapter. It now behoves me to mention the third gentleman, who chose his site on the outskirts of the village, some two miles from Jettan's Pride, and to the east. To reach it you must walk along the main street until the cottages grow sparse and yet more sparse, and the cobblestones and pavement cease altogether. The street turns then into a lane with trees flanking it and grass growing to the sides. A few steps further, and the moss-covered roof of Sharley House peeps above a high holly hedge which screens the place from the passer-by.
A while back, I talked about three guys who built their homes around Little Fittledean. I didn't say much about one of them, and I went on at length about the second one in an entire chapter. Now, I need to bring up the third guy, who picked his location on the outskirts of the village, about two miles from Jettan's Pride and to the east. To get there, you have to walk down the main street until the cottages thin out more and more, and then the cobblestones and pavement disappear completely. The street then turns into a lane lined with trees and grass growing on the sides. A few steps further, and the moss-covered roof of Sharley House peeks above a tall holly hedge that keeps it hidden from passersby.
There lived Mr. Charteris, and his father and grandfather before him. Mr. Charteris was the happy possessor of a wife and a daughter. It is with the daughter that I am most concerned.
There lived Mr. Charteris, along with his father and grandfather before him. Mr. Charteris was happily married and had a daughter. It's the daughter that I'm most focused on.
Her name was Cleone, and she was very lovely. She had thick gold curls, eyes of cornflower blue, and a pair of red lips that pouted or smiled in equal fascination. She was just eighteen, and the joy and despair of all the young men of the countryside. Particularly was she the despair of Mr. Philip Jettan.
Her name was Cleone, and she was really beautiful. She had thick golden curls, cornflower blue eyes, and a pair of red lips that could pout or smile with the same captivating charm. At just eighteen, she was the source of both joy and heartache for all the young men in the area. She especially caused Mr. Philip Jettan a great deal of heartbreak.
Philip was head over ears in love with Cleone. He had been so ever since she returned from the convent where she had received a slight education. Before her departure for this convent, she and Philip, James and Jennifer Winton, had played together and quarrelled together since any of them could walk. Then Cleone went away to acquire polish, and the two boys thought very little more about her, until she returned, and then they thought of nothing else but her. The romping playfellow was gone for ever, but in her place was a Vision. Philip and James began to eye one another askance.
Philip was completely in love with Cleone. He had been since she came back from the convent where she had gotten a bit of an education. Before she left for that convent, she and Philip, along with James and Jennifer Winton, had played together and argued since they could walk. Then Cleone went away to become more sophisticated, and the two boys hardly thought about her anymore until she came back, and then she was all they could think about. The playful friend was gone for good, but in her place was a vision. Philip and James started to look at each other differently.
Delighted by the new state of affairs, Cleone queened it right royally, and played one young man against the other. But it was not long before she found herself thinking far more about Mr. Jettan than was seemly. He began to haunt her dreams, and when he came to visit the house her heart fluttered a little and showed a tendency to jump into her throat.
Delighted by the new situation, Cleone acted like a queen and played one young man against the other. But it didn’t take long for her to realize she was thinking about Mr. Jettan far more than was appropriate. He started to invade her dreams, and when he came to visit the house, her heart would flutter a bit and feel like it was about to jump into her throat.
Cleone was stern with her heart, for there was much in Mr. Jettan that did not meet with her approval. However masterful and handsome he might be—and Philip was both—he was distressingly boorish in many ways. Before her return to Sharley House Cleone had spent a few months with her aunt, who lived in Town. Several men had made very elegant love to her and showered compliments about her golden head. She had not cared the snap of her fingers for any one of them, but their graceful homage was very gratifying. Philip's speech was direct and purposeful, and his compliments were never neat. His clothes also left much to be desired. Cleone had an eye for colour and style; she liked her cavaliers to be à la mode. Sir Matthew Trelawney, for instance, had affected the most wonderful stockings, clocked with butterflies; Frederick King wore so excellently fitting a coat that, it was said, he required three men to ease him into it. Philip's coat was made for comfort; he would have scorned the stockings of Matthew Trelawney. He even refused to buy a wig, but wore his own brown hair brushed back from his face and tied loosely at his neck with a piece of black ribbon. No powder, no curls, unpolished nails, and an unpainted face—guiltless, too, of even the smallest patch—it was, thought Cleone, enough to make one weep. Nevertheless, she did not weep, because, for one thing, it would have made her eyes red, and another, it would be of very little use. Philip must be reformed, since she—well, since she did not dislike him.
Cleone was tough on herself because there was a lot about Mr. Jettan that she didn’t like. No matter how charming and attractive he was—and Philip was both—he could be incredibly rude in many ways. Before she went back to Sharley House, Cleone had spent a few months with her aunt, who lived in the city. Several men had made very romantic advances toward her and showered her with compliments about her beautiful hair. She hadn’t cared one bit about any of them, but their flattering attention was quite pleasing. Philip spoke directly and with purpose, and his compliments were anything but polished. His clothes also left a lot to be desired. Cleone had a good eye for color and style; she preferred her admirers to be fashionable. For example, Sir Matthew Trelawney wore the most amazing stockings with butterfly designs, and Frederick King had such a well-fitting coat that people said he needed three men to help him get into it. Philip’s coat was made for comfort; he would have scoffed at Matthew Trelawney’s stockings. He even refused to buy a wig, opting instead to wear his own brown hair brushed back from his face and loosely tied at his neck with a piece of black ribbon. No powder, no curls, unpolished nails, and his face was completely bare—Cleone thought it was enough to make anyone cry. Still, she didn’t cry because, for one, it would make her eyes red, and for another, it wouldn’t do any good. Philip needed to change since she—well, since she didn’t actually dislike him.
At the present time Philip had just returned from Town, whither he had been sent by his father, ostensibly to transact some business concerning the estate, but really that his unfashionable soul might succumb to the delights of Town. Philip was not aware of this secret purpose, but Cleone knew all about it. She was very fond of Sir Maurice, and he of her. When Sir Maurice saw which way Philip looked for a wife, he was pleased enough, although a Jettan might have cast his eyes much higher. But Sir Maurice, mindful of the old adage, was content to let things run their course. All that worried him was the apparent obduracy of his son in the matter of the first prophecy. He loved Philip, he did not wish to lose him, he liked his companionship, but—"By God, sir, you are a damned dull dog!"
At the moment, Philip had just come back from Town, where his father had sent him, supposedly to handle some estate business, but really so his somewhat old-fashioned self could enjoy the pleasures of Town. Philip wasn’t aware of this hidden intention, but Cleone knew all about it. She was very fond of Sir Maurice, and he felt the same way about her. When Sir Maurice noticed who Philip was considering for a wife, he was quite pleased, even though someone from the Jettan family might have aimed higher. However, Sir Maurice, remembering the old saying, was okay with letting things unfold naturally. What worried him was his son’s apparent stubbornness regarding the first prophecy. He loved Philip, didn’t want to lose him, and enjoyed their time together, but—"By God, sir, you are a damned dull dog!"
At that young Philip's straight brows drew close over the bridge of his nose, only to relax again as he smiled.
At that moment, young Philip's straight brows furrowed together over the bridge of his nose, but then they relaxed again as he smiled.
"Well, sir, I hold two gay dogs in the family to be enough."
"Well, sir, I think having two playful dogs in the family is plenty."
Sir Maurice's mouth quivered responsively.
Sir Maurice's mouth quivered in response.
"What's that, Philip? Do you seek to reprove me?"
"What's that, Philip? Are you trying to criticize me?"
"Not a whit, sir. You are you, but I—am I."
"Not at all, sir. You are yourself, but I—who am I?"
"So it seems," said his father. "And you being yourself have fallen in love with a mighty pretty child; still being yourself, you are like to be left disconsolate."
"So it seems," said his father. "And you, being yourself, have fallen in love with a really pretty girl; but being yourself, you're likely to be left heartbroken."
Philip had flushed slightly at the reference to Cleone. The end of the sentence left him frowning.
Philip had turned a bit red at the mention of Cleone. The end of the sentence left him scowling.
"What mean you, sir?"
"What do you mean, sir?"
The shrewd grey eyes, so like his own, regarded him pityingly.
The sharp grey eyes, so similar to his own, looked at him with pity.
"Little Mistress Cleone will have none of you an you fail to mend your ways, my son. Do you not know it? What has that dainty piece to do with a raw clodhopper like yourself?"
"Little Mistress Cleone won't have anything to do with you if you don't change your ways, my son. Don't you know that? What does that refined girl have to do with a clumsy oaf like you?"
Philip answered low.
Philip whispered.
"If Mistress Cleone gives me her love it will be for me as I am. She is worthy a man, not a powdered, ruffled beau."
"If Mistress Cleone loves me, it will be for who I am. She deserves a real man, not some fancy, dressed-up dandy."
"A man! Sacré tonnerre, 'tis what you are, hein? Philip, child, get you to Town to your uncle and buy a wig."
"A man! Holy thunder, that's what you are, right? Philip, sweetie, go to Town to your uncle and buy a wig."
"No, sir, I thank you. I shall do very well without a wig."
"No, thank you, sir. I’ll do just fine without a wig."
Sir Maurice drove his cane downwards at the floor in exasperation.
Sir Maurice slammed his cane down on the floor in frustration.
"Mille diables! You'll to Town as I say, defiant boy! You may finish the business with that scoundrel Jenkins while you are about it!"
"Thousand devils! You're going to Town as I say, rebellious boy! You might as well take care of that scoundrel Jenkins while you're at it!"
Philip nodded.
Philip agreed.
"That I will do, sir, since you wish it."
"Sure, I'll do that, sir, since you want me to."
"Bah!" retorted his father.
"Bah!" replied his father.
He had gone; now he had come back, the business details settled to his satisfaction, but with no wig. Sir Maurice was pleased to see him again, more pleased than he appeared, as Philip was well aware. He listened to what his son had to tell him of Tom Jettan, failed to glean any of the latest society gossip, and dismissed Philip from his presence.
He had left; now he was back, the business matters sorted out to his liking, but without a wig. Sir Maurice was happy to see him again, more than he let on, as Philip knew well. He listened to what his son had to say about Tom Jettan, didn’t pick up any of the latest social gossip, and then sent Philip away.
Half an hour later Philip rode in at the gates of Sharley House, sitting straight in his saddle, a pulse in his throat throbbing in anticipation.
Half an hour later, Philip rode through the gates of Sharley House, sitting straight in his saddle, a pulse in his throat throbbing with anticipation.
Cleone saw him coming. She was seated in the parlour window, embroidering in a languid fashion. Truth to tell, she was tired of her own company and not at all averse from seeing Philip. As he passed the window she bent forward a little, smiling down at him. Philip saw her at once; indeed, he had been eyeing every window of the warm, red house in the hope that she might be sitting in one. He reined in his horse and bowed to her, hat in hand.
Cleone saw him approaching. She was sitting in the parlor window, casually embroidering. To be honest, she was bored with her own company and wouldn’t mind seeing Philip at all. As he walked by the window, she leaned forward a bit, smiling down at him. Philip noticed her immediately; in fact, he had been scanning every window of the warm, red house, hoping she might be in one. He pulled back on his horse and tipped his hat to her.
Cleone opened the casement wider, leaning over the sill, her golden curls falling forward under the strings of her cap.
Cleone opened the window wider, leaning over the sill, her golden curls falling forward under the ties of her cap.
"Why, sir, are you back already?" she asked, dimpling.
"Why, sir, are you back already?" she asked, smiling.
"Already!" he echoed. "It has been years! Ten years, Cleone!"
"Already!" he repeated. "It's been years! Ten years, Cleone!"
"Pooh!" she said. "Ten days—not a moment more!"
"Pooh!" she said. "Ten days—not a second longer!"
"Is that all it has seemed to you?" he said.
"Is that all it seems to you?" he said.
Cleone's cheek became faintly tinged with pink.
Cleone's cheek turned a light shade of pink.
"What more?" she retorted. "'Tis all it is!"
"What else?" she shot back. "That's all it is!"
Into Philip's eyes came a gleam of triumph.
Into Philip's eyes came a gleam of victory.
"Aha! You've counted, then! Oh, Cleone!"
"Aha! So you've counted, huh? Oh, Cleone!"
The roguish look fled.
The mischievous look vanished.
"Oh!" cried Cleone, pouting. "How—how—monstrous—"
"Oh!" cried Cleone, sulking. "How—how—awful—"
"Monstrous what, dear Cleone?"
"What’s monstrous, dear Cleone?"
"Impudent!" she ended. "I declare I won't see you!" As if to add weight to this statement, she shut the casement and moved away into the room.
"How rude!" she concluded. "I can't believe I'm going to see you!" To emphasize her point, she slammed the window shut and walked away into the room.
Presently, however, she relented, and tripped downstairs to the withdrawing-room, where she found Mr. Jettan paying his respects to her mamma. She curtseyed very demurely, allowed him to kiss the tips of her fingers, and seated herself beside Madam Charteris.
Presently, though, she gave in and went downstairs to the living room, where she found Mr. Jettan paying his respects to her mom. She curtsied politely, let him kiss the tips of her fingers, and took a seat next to Madam Charteris.
Madam patted her hand.
Ma'am patted her hand.
"Well, child, here is Philip returned from Town with not a word to tell us of his gaiety!"
"Well, kid, here’s Philip back from town with nothing to share about his fun!"
Cleone raised her eyes to survey Philip.
Cleone looked up to check out Philip.
"Mamma, there is naught to tell. Philip is such a staid, sober person."
"Mom, there's nothing to say. Philip is such a serious, responsible person."
"Tut-tut!" said her mother. "Now, Philip, tell us all! Did you not meet one beauty to whom you lost your heart?"
"Tut-tut!" said her mother. "Now, Philip, tell us everything! Didn't you meet one beautiful girl who made you lose your heart?"
"No, madam," answered Philip. "The painted society dames attract me not at all." His eyes rested on Cleone as he spoke.
"No, ma'am," Philip replied. "I'm not attracted to the painted society ladies at all." His gaze lingered on Cleone as he spoke.
"I dare say you've not yet heard the news?" Cleone said, after a slight pause. "Or did Sir Maurice tell you?"
"I guess you haven't heard the news yet?" Cleone said, after a brief pause. "Or did Sir Maurice mention it to you?"
"No—that is, I do not know. What is it? Good news?"
"No—I mean, I don't know. What's going on? Good news?"
"It remains to be seen," she replied. "'Tis that Mr. Bancroft is to return! What think you of that?"
"It remains to be seen," she replied. "It's that Mr. Bancroft is coming back! What do you think of that?"
Philip stiffened.
Philip tensed.
"Bancroft? Sir Harold's son?"
"Bancroft? Sir Harold's kid?"
"Yes, Henry Bancroft. Is it not exciting? Only think—he has been away nigh on eight years! Why, he must be—" she began to count on her rosy-tipped fingers "—twenty-six, or twenty-seven. Oh, a man! I do so wonder what he is like now!"
"Yes, Henry Bancroft. Isn't it exciting? Just think—he's been gone for almost eight years! Wow, he must be—" she started counting on her pretty fingers "—twenty-six or twenty-seven. Oh, a man! I really wonder what he's like now!"
"H'm!" remarked Philip. His voice held no enthusiasm. "What does he want here?"
"Hmm!" Philip said. His tone was flat. "What does he want here?"
Cleone's long lashes fluttered down to hide the laugh in her eyes.
Cleone's long lashes fluttered down to hide the laughter in her eyes.
"To see his papa, of course. After so many years!"
"To see his dad, of course. After so many years!"
Philip gave vent to a sound very like a snort.
Philip let out a sound that was almost a snort.
"I'll wager there's a more potent reason! Else had he come home ere now."
"I bet there's a stronger reason! Otherwise, he would have been home by now."
"Well, I will tell you. Papa rode over to Great Fittledean two days ago, and he found Sir Harold mightily amused, did he not, Mamma?"
"Well, I'll tell you. Dad rode over to Great Fittledean two days ago, and he found Sir Harold really amused, didn't he, Mom?"
Madam Charteris assented vaguely. She was stitching at a length of satin, content to drop out of the conversation.
Madam Charteris nodded vaguely. She was sewing a piece of satin, happy to tune out of the conversation.
"Yes. It seems that Henry—"
"Yeah. It looks like Henry—"
"Who?" Philip straightened in his chair.
"Who?" Philip sat up straight in his chair.
"Mr. Bancroft," said Cleone. A smile trembled on her lips. "It seems that Mr. Bancroft has had occasion to fight a duel. Is it not too dreadful?"
"Mr. Bancroft," Cleone said, a smile playing on her lips. "It looks like Mr. Bancroft has had to fight a duel. Isn’t that just awful?"
Philip agreed with more heartiness than he had yet shown.
Philip agreed with more enthusiasm than he had shown before.
"I am sure I do not know why gentlemen must fight. 'Tis very terrible, I think. But, of course, 'tis monstrous gallant and exciting. And poor Mr. Bancroft has been advised to leave London for a while, because some great personage is angered. Papa did not say who was the gentleman he fought, but Sir Harold was vastly amused." She glanced up at Philip, in time to catch sight of the scornful frown on his face. "Oh, Philip, do you know? Have you perhaps heard?"
"I really don’t understand why guys have to fight. It’s pretty awful, I think. But, of course, it’s also super brave and thrilling. And poor Mr. Bancroft has been told to leave London for a bit because some important person is upset. Dad didn't say who he fought, but Sir Harold found it really funny." She looked up at Philip, just in time to see the scornful frown on his face. "Oh, Philip, do you know? Have you maybe heard?"
"No one who has been in Town this last week could fail to have heard," said Philip shortly. Then, very abruptly, he changed the subject.
"No one who's been in town this past week could have missed it," Philip said abruptly. Then, he suddenly switched topics.
When Philip came back to the Pride it was close on the dinner hour. He walked slowly upstairs to change his clothes, for on that point Sir Maurice was obdurate. He would not allow buckskins or riding-boots at his table. He himself was fastidious to a fault. Every evening he donned stiff satins and velvets; his thin face was painted, powdered and patched; his wig tied with great precision in the nape of his neck. He walked now with a stick, but his carriage was still fairly upright. The stick was, as Philip told him, a mere affectation.
When Philip returned to the Pride, it was just before dinner. He slowly walked upstairs to change his clothes, because Sir Maurice was determined about that. He wouldn’t allow anyone to wear buckskins or riding boots at his table. Sir Maurice was extremely particular about his appearance. Every evening, he dressed in stiff satins and velvets; his thin face was painted, powdered, and patched; his wig was tied with great care at the back of his neck. He now walked with a cane, but he still held himself fairly upright. The cane was, as Philip pointed out to him, just an affectation.
Philip was rather silent during the first part of the meal, but when the lackeys left the room, and Sir Maurice pushed the port towards him, he spoke suddenly, as if the words had hovered on his tongue for some time.
Philip was pretty quiet during the first part of the meal, but when the servants left the room and Sir Maurice passed the port to him, he suddenly spoke, as if the words had been waiting on his tongue for a while.
"Father, do you hear that Bancroft is to return?"
" Dad, did you hear that Bancroft is coming back?"
Sir Maurice selected a nut from the dish before him, cracking it between his long, white fingers.
Sir Maurice picked a nut from the dish in front of him and cracked it open between his long, white fingers.
"I believe someone told me. What of it?"
"I think someone mentioned it to me. So what?"
"You said nothing of it to me."
"You didn’t say anything about it to me."
The grey eyes lifted.
The gray eyes lifted.
"Is he a friend of yours? I did not know."
"Is he your friend? I didn't know that."
"A friend!" Philip set his glass down with a snap. "Hardly, sir!"
"A friend!" Philip put his glass down sharply. "Barely, sir!"
"Now what's to do?" asked his father. "Why the scorn?"
"What's the plan now?" his father asked. "Why the judgement?"
"Sir, if you could but hear the gossip about him!"
"Hey, if you could just hear the rumors about him!"
"I have no doubt I should be vastly entertained," said Sir Maurice. "What's the tale?"
"I have no doubt I'll be greatly entertained," said Sir Maurice. "What's the story?"
"The fellow is for ever embroiling himself in some low quarrel. This time it is Lady Marchand. Faugh!"
"The guy is always getting himself into some petty argument. This time it’s Lady Marchand. Ugh!"
"Lady Marchand? Not Dolly Marchand?"
"Lady Marchand? Not Dolly Marchand?"
"I believe so. Why, sir, do you know her?"
"I think so. Why, do you know her?"
"I—er—knew her mother. Tell me, is she as charming?"
"I, uh, knew her mom. Tell me, is she as charming?"
"As I know neither her mother, nor Lady Marchand—"
"As I know neither her mother nor Lady Marchand—"
Sir Maurice sighed.
Sir Maurice sighed.
"No. Of course not. Go on."
"No. Of course not. Go ahead."
"It's a damned sordid tale, sir, and I'll spare you the details. Lord Marchand and Bancroft fought out at Ipswich. Bancroft wounded him in the lung, and 'tis said he'll not recover."
"It's a really ugly story, sir, and I'll spare you the details. Lord Marchand and Bancroft had a fight out in Ipswich. Bancroft wounded him in the lung, and it's said he won't recover."
"Clumsy," remarked Sir Maurice. "So Bancroft retires?"
"Clumsy," said Sir Maurice. "So Bancroft is stepping down?"
"The Prince of Wales is furious, as well he might be. And Bancroft brings himself and his morals here."
"The Prince of Wales is furious, and he has every right to be. And Bancroft brings himself and his morals here."
A faint smile hovered on Sir Maurice's lips.
A slight smile lingered on Sir Maurice's lips.
"And Mr. Jettan is righteously indignant. From which I gather that Mistress Cleone is prepared to welcome this slayer of hearts. You'd best have bought a wig, Philip."
"And Mr. Jettan is justifiably upset. From this, I understand that Mistress Cleone is ready to greet this heartbreaker. You should have bought a wig, Philip."
In spite of himself, Philip laughed.
In spite of himself, Philip laughed.
"Sir, you are incorrigible!"
"Sir, you're unstoppable!"
"Faute de mieux. And whence, if I may ask, did you glean all this—sordid information, oh my righteous son?"
"For lack of a better option. And where, if I may ask, did you get all this—disturbing information, oh my virtuous son?"
"From Tom, of course. He could talk of nothing else."
"From Tom, obviously. He couldn’t stop talking about it."
"Alack! The saint is still upon his pedestal. In fact, the story was forced upon you. Philip, you enrage me." He looked up and met his son's amused glance. "Yes, child, I am enraged. Pass the wine."
"Alas! The saint is still on his pedestal. Actually, the story was thrust upon you. Philip, you infuriate me." He looked up and caught his son's amused gaze. "Yes, kid, I am furious. Pass the wine."
Philip pushed the decanter towards him. His rather stern eyes were twinkling.
Philip pushed the decanter toward him. His rather serious eyes were sparkling.
"I'll swear no one ever before possessed so outrageous a sire," he said. "I've heard of some who disinherited their sons for disreputable behaviour, but it seems you are like to disinherit me for irreproachable conduct."
"I’ll swear no one ever had a father as outrageous as mine," he said. "I’ve heard of some who cut off their sons for bad behavior, but it looks like you’re ready to disinherit me for behaving well."
"It's a piquante situation," agreed Sir Maurice. "But I shan't disinherit you."
"It's a spicy situation," agreed Sir Maurice. "But I won't disinherit you."
"No?"
"Nope?"
"Where's the use? With no money you could not hope to—ah—follow in my footsteps. I've a mind to turn you out of the house, though."
"What's the point? Without any money, you can't expect to—uh—follow in my footsteps. I’m actually thinking of kicking you out of the house, though."
"Half a mind," corrected Philip. "The other half, sir, rejoices in my unblemished reputation."
"Half a mind," Philip corrected. "The other half, sir, takes pride in my spotless reputation."
"Does it?" Sir Maurice was mildly interested. "Faith, I did not know that."
"Does it?" Sir Maurice said, somewhat intrigued. "Honestly, I didn't know that."
"Sir, were I to break away and become as flighty as you wish, no one would be more aghast than yourself."
"Sir, if I were to break free and become as unpredictable as you want, no one would be more shocked than you."
"You infer, my son, that I desire you to follow not in my footsteps, but in—let us say, Bancroft's. Nothing could more thoroughly disgust me."
"You assume, my son, that I want you to follow not in my footsteps, but in—let's say, Bancroft's. Nothing could disgust me more."
"Ah!" Philip leaned forward eagerly. "You admit that?"
"Ah!" Philip leaned forward eagerly. "You admit that?"
Sir Maurice sipped his wine.
Sir Maurice drank his wine.
"Certainly. I abhor clumsiness in an affaire." He watched Philip draw back. "An affaire of the heart should be daintily conducted. A Jettan should bear in mind that for him there can be only one love; the others," he waved his hand, "should be treated with the delicacy that they deserve. Above all, they should end lightly. I would have no woman the worse for you, child, but I would have you know women and the world. I would have you experience the pleasures and the displeasures of Polite Society; I would have you taste the joys of Hazard, and the exhilaration of your sword against another's; I would have you take pains in the selection of a cravat, or the designing of a vest; I would have you learn the way to turn a neat compliment and a pretty phrase; above all, I would have you know yourself, your fellow-men, and the world." He paused, studying his son. Then he smiled. "Well? What have you to say to my peroration?"
"Of course. I can't stand clumsiness in a affaire." He watched Philip pull back. "An affaire of the heart should be handled with grace. A Jettan should remember that there can only be one true love for him; the others," he waved his hand, "should be treated with the sensitivity they deserve. Most importantly, they should end gently. I wouldn't want any woman to suffer because of you, my child, but I want you to understand women and the world. I want you to experience the pleasures and pains of Polite Society; I want you to enjoy the thrills of Hazard, and the excitement of your sword against someone else's; I want you to care about picking a cravat or designing a vest; I want you to learn how to give a smooth compliment and a charming line; above all, I want you to understand yourself, your fellow men, and the world." He paused, studying his son. Then he smiled. "So? What do you have to say to my speech?"
Philip answered simply, and in admiration.
Philip replied straightforwardly and with admiration.
"Why, sir, that I am spellbound by your fluency. In truth, Father, you have a remarkably beautiful voice."
"Wow, sir, I’m captivated by how well you speak. Honestly, Father, you have a really beautiful voice."
"Bah!" snapped Sir Maurice.
"Bah!" snapped Sir Maurice.
ThreeThree
Mr. Bancroft Brings Trouble into Little FittledeanMr. Bancroft Brings Trouble to Little Fittledean
On a particularly sunny morning, some five or six days after Mr. Jettan's return from London town, the main street of Little Fittledean was made brighter still by the passage of an Apparition.
On a particularly sunny morning, about five or six days after Mr. Jettan returned from London, the main street of Little Fittledean was made even brighter by the passing of an Apparition.
The Apparition wore a coat of palest apricot cloth, with a flowered vest of fine brocade, and startling white small-clothes. Red-heeled shoes were on his feet, and his stockings were adorned by sprawling golden clocks. He carried an amber-clouded cane and a jewelled snuff-box, while ever and anon he raised a cobwebby handkerchief to his aristocratic nose. He minced down the street towards the market-place, followed by the awe-stricken glances of an amazed population. The inhabitants of the village had never seen anything so wonderful or so remarkable as this gorgeous gentleman. They watched the high red heels click along the road, and admired the beautiful set of the Apparition's coat. A group of children stopped playing to stare, open-mouthed. The Apparition heeded them not. It may have been that he was oblivious of their existence. Not even when a piping treble requested "John" to "look'ee now at them shoes!" did he show that he realised the presence of anyone but himself in the village. He minced on, very languid, and suitably bored.
The Apparition wore a coat of very light apricot fabric, with a flowered vest made of fine brocade, and striking white underwear. He had on red-heeled shoes, and his stockings were decorated with sprawling golden patterns. He carried a cane with an amber tint and a jeweled snuff-box, while occasionally raising a delicate handkerchief to his posh nose. He walked down the street toward the market, followed by the awe-struck gazes of amazed onlookers. The villagers had never seen anything as wonderful or extraordinary as this stylish gentleman. They watched the high red heels click along the road and admired the fine fit of the Apparition's coat. A group of children paused their game to stare, mouths agape. The Apparition paid them no mind. It was possible he didn’t even notice they were there. Not even when a high-pitched voice called out "John" to "look at those shoes!" did he acknowledge anyone else's presence in the village. He continued on, very languid and seemingly bored.
Further down the street a gentleman had reined in his horse to speak to a curtseying dame, who plucked shyly at her apron, smiling up at him. Presently he, too, became aware of the sound of clicking heels. Even as the buxom dame gazed past him with wide eyes, he looked up and saw the Apparition.
Further down the street, a gentleman had pulled back on his horse to talk to a curtsying woman, who nervously fiddled with her apron, smiling up at him. Soon, he also noticed the sound of clicking heels. Just as the plump woman looked past him with wide eyes, he glanced up and saw the Apparition.
I would not have you think that the Apparition noticed him. On he went, swinging his cane and yawning.
I wouldn’t want you to think that the Apparition noticed him. He kept going, swinging his cane and yawning.
Sir Maurice turned in his saddle the better to see those pearly small-clothes. His horse cocked both ears inquiringly and blew down his nostrils.
Sir Maurice turned in his saddle to get a better look at those shiny breeches. His horse perked up both ears curiously and snorted.
"Well, I'm damned!" said Sir Maurice beneath his breath. "Puppy!"
"Well, I'm shocked!" said Sir Maurice under his breath. "Puppy!"
Mr. Bancroft proceeded leisurely towards the market-place. He was very, very bored, and he had walked over from Great Fittledean in search of possible amusement. He almost despaired of finding it, but Fate favoured him.
Mr. Bancroft walked casually toward the market square. He was extremely bored and had made the trek from Great Fittledean looking for some entertainment. He was ready to give up on finding any, but luck was on his side.
Crossing the market-place, a basket on her arm and a very becoming hat tied over her curls, was Mistress Cleone. She was tripping along quite unconcernedly, her cheeks just tinged with colour, and her big eyes bluer than ever. Mr. Bancroft lost a little of his languor. It might almost be said that his eye brightened.
Crossing the marketplace, a basket on her arm and a very stylish hat tied over her curls, was Mistress Cleone. She was walking along quite casually, her cheeks slightly flushed, and her big eyes were bluer than ever. Mr. Bancroft lost some of his lethargy. You could almost say that his eyes lit up.
Cleone was coming towards him, and it was markedly evident that Mr. Bancroft made no attempt to step aside. On the contrary, he appeared to be engrossed in the contemplation of a cat right away on his left. Cleone was peeping inside her basket; she did not perceive Mr. Bancroft until she had walked into him. Then she gave a startled cry, fell back, and stared.
Cleone was walking toward him, and it was clear that Mr. Bancroft wasn't trying to move out of the way. Instead, he seemed completely focused on looking at a cat just to his left. Cleone was looking inside her basket; she didn’t notice Mr. Bancroft until she bumped into him. Then she let out a surprised gasp, stepped back, and stared.
Mr. Bancroft was profuse in his apologies. He swept off his hat and made her a low bow, sinking back and back on his bent left leg.
Mr. Bancroft was very apologetic. He took off his hat and gave her a deep bow, leaning back on his bent left leg.
"Oh!" gasped Cleone, becomingly flustered. "Gracious! Is it you, Mr. Bancroft?"
"Oh!" gasped Cleone, becomingly flustered. "Wow! Is that you, Mr. Bancroft?"
Mr. Bancroft said that it was. He was very modest about it, and he dubbed himself a clodhopping oaf so to have discommoded Cleone.
Mr. Bancroft said that it was. He was very humble about it, and he called himself a clumsy fool for having bothered Cleone.
Cleone dimpled, curtseyed, and prepared to go on her way. This, however, Mr. Bancroft would not allow. He insisted on taking her basket, which, he protested, was monstrous heavy for her fair hands to support.
Cleone smiled, did a little bow, and got ready to head off. However, Mr. Bancroft wouldn’t let that happen. He insisted on carrying her basket, claiming it was way too heavy for her delicate hands to handle.
Cleone looked up at him provocatively.
Cleone gazed at him in a teasing way.
"Sir, I fear I am a stranger to you!"
"Sir, I think I don’t know you!"
"A stranger! Why, madam, is it likely that once I had seen I could ever forget your sweet face?" cried Mr. Bancroft. "Those blue eyes, madam, left a deep imprint on my soul; those soft lips—"
"A stranger! Why, ma'am, is it possible that after seeing you just once I could ever forget your lovely face?" exclaimed Mr. Bancroft. "Those blue eyes, ma'am, made a lasting impression on my soul; those soft lips—"
"But," interrupted Cleone, blushing, "my name escaped your memory. Confess, Mr. Bancroft, it is indeed so?"
"But," Cleone interrupted, blushing, "you've forgotten my name. Come on, Mr. Bancroft, admit it."
Mr. Bancroft waved his handkerchief with a superb gesture.
Mr. Bancroft waved his handkerchief with a stylish gesture.
"A name—bah! What is it? 'Tis the face that remains with me. Names do, indeed, escape me. How could a mere name conjure up this fair image?" He bowed slightly. "Your name should be Venus, madam."
"A name—ugh! What is it? It's the face that stays with me. Names really do slip my mind. How could a simple name bring to mind such a beautiful image?" He bowed slightly. "Your name should be Venus, ma'am."
"Sir!" Cleone was shocked. "I am Cleone Charteris, Mr. Bancroft," she said primly.
"Sir!" Cleone was shocked. "I am Cleone Charteris, Mr. Bancroft," she said formally.
Mr. Bancroft was quite equal to the occasion.
Mr. Bancroft was more than capable of handling the situation.
"My dear," he said fondly, "do you think I did not know it?"
"My dear," he said affectionately, "do you think I didn't know that?"
Cleone shook her head.
Cleone shook her head.
"You did not know it. And, indeed, I am prodigiously hurt and offended that you should have forgot me."
"You didn’t know it. And honestly, I’m incredibly hurt and offended that you forgot about me."
"Forgot you?" Mr. Bancroft was derisive. "Forget the little nymph who so tormented me in my youth? Fie on you, madam!"
"Forgot you?" Mr. Bancroft scoffed. "Forget the little nymph who tormented me so much in my youth? Shame on you, madam!"
"Oh, I did not! How can you say so, sir? 'Twas you who were always so provoking! Do you remember how we played? You and Jennifer and I and Philip—oh, and James."
"Oh, I didn't! How can you say that, sir? It was you who were always so annoying! Do you remember how we played? You, Jennifer, Philip, and me—oh, and James."
"The games I remember," he answered. "But Jennifer, no. And who are Philip and James?"
"The games I remember," he replied. "But Jennifer, no. And who are Philip and James?"
"You've a monstrous short memory," reproved Cleone. "Of course you remember Philip Jettan?"
"You have a terrible memory," Cleone scolded. "Of course you remember Philip Jettan?"
"How could I hope to remember anyone but your fair self?" he protested. "Could I be sensible of another's presence when you were there?"
"How could I possibly remember anyone other than you?" he insisted. "Can I even notice someone else when you’re around?"
Cleone giggled. She found Mr. Bancroft's compliments very entertaining and novel.
Cleone giggled. She found Mr. Bancroft's compliments really amusing and refreshing.
"You are quite ridiculous, sir. And this is my home."
"You are really ridiculous, sir. And this is my house."
"Alas!" sighed Mr. Bancroft. "I would it were a mile away." He opened the gate and held it for her, bowing. "May I pay my respects to Madam Charteris?" he begged.
"Alas!" sighed Mr. Bancroft. "I wish it were a mile away." He opened the gate and held it for her, bowing. "May I pay my respects to Madam Charteris?" he asked.
"If you please, sir," said Cleone, eyes cast down.
"If you don't mind, sir," Cleone said, looking down.
They found madam in the hall, speaking to one of the servants. When she saw the resplendent Mr. Bancroft she gasped, and fell back a pace.
They found the lady in the hallway, talking to one of the servants. When she saw the dazzling Mr. Bancroft, she gasped and took a step back.
Bancroft stepped forward, hat in hand.
Bancroft stepped up, holding his hat.
"I dare not hope for recognition, madam," he bowed. "Henry Bancroft begs you will allow him to kiss your hand."
"I don't dare to hope for recognition, ma'am," he said with a bow. "Henry Bancroft requests your permission to kiss your hand."
Madam Charteris extended it weakly.
Ms. Charteris extended it weakly.
"Henry Bancroft? Gracious heaven, is it indeed you?"
"Henry Bancroft? Oh my goodness, is that really you?"
Bancroft kissed the tips of her fingers, holding them lightly to his mouth with two fingers and a thumb.
Bancroft kissed the tips of her fingers, gently holding them to his mouth with two fingers and a thumb.
"I met Mistress Cleone in the market-place," he told her. "Conceive my surprise, madam, my joyful ecstasy!"
"I met Mistress Cleone in the marketplace," he told her. "Imagine my surprise, ma'am, my joyful ecstasy!"
"Indeed!" stammered madam. "In the market-place—to be sure."
"Absolutely!" stammered the lady. "In the marketplace—for sure."
"Mr. Bancroft was so kind as to relieve me of my basket," explained her daughter. "He pretends that he had not forgot me, Mamma! But he cannot deceive me."
"Mr. Bancroft was really nice to take my basket off my hands," her daughter explained. "He acts like he hasn't forgotten me, Mom! But he can't fool me."
"He never sought to deceive you, Mistress Cleone. He spoke sooth when he said your image had remained with him throughout."
"He never tried to mislead you, Mistress Cleone. He was honest when he said your image has stayed with him all this time."
"Take him into the garden, Cleone," begged madam. "He will wish to see your papa."
"Take him to the garden, Cleone," urged Madam. "He will want to see your dad."
It had not occurred to Mr. Bancroft, but he swallowed it with a good grace.
It hadn’t crossed Mr. Bancroft's mind, but he accepted it with good grace.
"Will you conduct me thither, Mistress Cleone?" He bowed, one arm extended.
"Will you take me there, Mistress Cleone?" He bowed, one arm outstretched.
Cleone laid the tips of her fingers on the arm.
Cleone rested the tips of her fingers on the arm.
"Certainly, sir. We shall find Papa among the roses." They walked to the door.
"Of course, sir. We'll find Dad among the roses." They walked to the door.
"The roses!" sighed Mr. Bancroft. "A fit setting for your beauty, dear Cleone."
"The roses!" sighed Mr. Bancroft. "A perfect backdrop for your beauty, dear Cleone."
Cleone gave a little gurgle of laughter.
Cleone let out a soft giggle.
"'Tis Papa's beauty they frame, sir, not mine," she replied.
"'It's Papa's beauty they highlight, not mine," she replied.
Twenty minutes later Sir Maurice walked into the rose-garden to find Bancroft and Cleone seated in an arbour engaged in close converse, while Mr. Charteris nipped off the dead flowers nearby.
Twenty minutes later, Sir Maurice walked into the rose garden to find Bancroft and Cleone sitting in a gazebo, deep in conversation, while Mr. Charteris trimmed the dead flowers nearby.
Mr. Charteris welcomed his visitor with a wave of his large scissors.
Mr. Charteris greeted his visitor with a wave of his big scissors.
"Good day, Sir Maurice! What a very pleasant, warm day it is, to be sure! Did you ride over to see us?"
"Good day, Sir Maurice! What a lovely, warm day it is, for sure! Did you come over to see us?"
Sir Maurice drew him apart.
Sir Maurice pulled him aside.
"I met that—that rainbow in the village. What a plague is it? What does he do here?"
"I met that—that rainbow in the village. What a nuisance is it? What is he doing here?"
Mr. Charteris' chubby countenance was wreathed in a great, sly smile, suspiciously like a grin.
Mr. Charteris' round face was lit up with a big, sly smile, almost like a grin.
"Have you ever seen aught to equal it?" he chuckled. "'Tis young Bancroft—in seclusion."
"Have you ever seen anything like it?" he chuckled. "It's young Bancroft—hiding away."
"I guessed as much. In seclusion, is he? Puppy!"
"I figured as much. In hiding, huh? Silly!"
Mr. Charteris held up his hands.
Mr. Charteris lifted his hands.
"Oh, but Sir Maurice! A mighty soft-spoken youth—a polished gentleman, I assure you."
"Oh, but Sir Maurice! A soft-spoken young man—a refined gentleman, I promise you."
"Polished coxcomb!" snapped Sir Maurice. "Confound his impudence!" He turned and walked towards the arbour.
"Polished fool!" snapped Sir Maurice. "Damn his audacity!" He turned and walked toward the gazebo.
Cleone rose and came forward.
Cleone stood up and approached.
"Why, Sir Maurice! I did not see you!"
"Wow, Sir Maurice! I didn't see you there!"
Sir Maurice raised both her hands to his lips.
Sir Maurice raised both her hands to his lips.
"You were otherwise engaged, my dear. Will you present your cavalier?"
"You were busy, my dear. Will you introduce your knight?"
Cleone frowned upon him.
Cleone frowned at him.
"Sir Maurice—! This is Mr. Bancroft, sir. Mr. Bancroft, Sir Maurice Jettan."
"Sir Maurice—! This is Mr. Bancroft, sir. Mr. Bancroft, Sir Maurice Jettan."
Mr. Bancroft's hat swept the ground. His powdered head was bent.
Mr. Bancroft's hat brushed the ground. His powdered head was lowered.
"I am delighted to renew my acquaintance with you, sir."
"I’m glad to reconnect with you, sir."
Sir Maurice inclined his head.
Sir Maurice nodded.
"I hear you intend to honour Fittledean for some few weeks?" he said. An inward laugh seemed to shake him. "You must meet my son, Philip."
"I hear you plan to honor Fittledean for a few weeks?" he said. An inward laugh seemed to shake him. "You have to meet my son, Philip."
"Nothing could give me more pleasure," Bancroft assured him. "I shall hope to do so at once. I am transported to meet such old friends, and to find that one"—he bowed to Cleone—"had not forgot me."
"Nothing would make me happier," Bancroft assured him. "I hope to do it right away. I'm thrilled to see such old friends and to find that one"—he bowed to Cleone—"hadn't forgotten me."
"H'm!" said Sir Maurice cryptically. Suddenly he smiled upon the younger man. "I have ridden over to beg Mr. Charteris to honour me at dinner on Wednesday—"
"H'm!" said Sir Maurice mysteriously. Suddenly he smiled at the younger man. "I've come over to ask Mr. Charteris to join me for dinner on Wednesday—"
"Delighted, delighted!" nodded Charteris, who had joined them.
"Thrilled, thrilled!" nodded Charteris, who had joined them.
"—with madam and Cleone. You'll come, my dear? I have already spoken to your mamma."
"—with Madam and Cleone. Are you coming, my dear? I've already talked to your mom."
Cleone slipped her hand in his arm.
Cleone linked her arm with his.
"Why, it's very kind of you, Sir Maurice. Thank you very much."
"Thank you so much, Sir Maurice. That’s really nice of you."
He patted the little hand. Then he again transferred his attention to Mr. Bancroft.
He patted the little hand. Then he turned his attention back to Mr. Bancroft.
"I trust you too will honour us, sir?"
"I hope you will also honor us, sir?"
"It is prodigious amiable of you, sir. I hasten to accept. On Wednesday, I think you said? With all the pleasure on earth!"
"It’s very kind of you, sir. I’m eager to accept. Wednesday, I believe you mentioned? With all the pleasure in the world!"
"Cleone, my dear, give me your arm as far as that rose-bush. You shall choose me a button-hole, if you will. No, no, Charteris, with her own fair fingers!" He bore Cleone away to the other end of the garden, leaving Mr. Bancroft disconsolate. When they were out of hearing Sir Maurice looked down into the roguish blue eyes. "My dear, you are a minx."
"Cleone, my dear, give me your arm until we reach that rosebush. You can pick a flower for my buttonhole, if you like. No, no, Charteris, let her do it with her own lovely fingers!" He led Cleone to the other end of the garden, leaving Mr. Bancroft feeling downcast. Once they were out of earshot, Sir Maurice looked into her mischievous blue eyes. "My dear, you're a little troublemaker."
Cleone dimpled charmingly.
Cleone smiled beautifully.
"I don't know why you should say so, sir."
"I don't know why you'd say that, sir."
"Of course not," agreed Sir Maurice. "Now what is the game? It's to make Philip jealous, eh?"
"Of course not," Sir Maurice agreed. "So what's the plan? It's to make Philip jealous, right?"
"Sir! How can you?"
"Sir! What are you doing?"
"My love, I know all about you, for I am an old man. Make Philip jealous by all means."
"My love, I know everything about you, because I'm an old man. Feel free to make Philip jealous."
"I'm sure I never—"
"I'm sure I never—"
"Of course not. But I think, with you, that it would be a very good plan. The boy is too stolid and cock-sure."
"Of course not. But I think, like you, that it would be a really good idea. The boy is too dull and overly confident."
"Cock—Oh, indeed!"
"Wow, really!"
"So if you shake Philip up from his toes to his head—you'll earn a father's blessing."
"So if you shake Philip from his toes to his head—you'll get a father's blessing."
Cleone controlled a trembling lip.
Cleone controlled a quivering lip.
"Sir—you are—a very naughty—conspirator."
"Sir, you are a sly conspirator."
"We'll leave it at that," said Sir Maurice. "Now choose me a rose, little witch. Gad, if I were ten years younger I'd make Philip jealous myself!"
"We'll leave it at that," Sir Maurice said. "Now pick me a rose, little witch. Honestly, if I were ten years younger, I’d make Philip jealous myself!"
Cleone tip-toed, her hands on his shoulders.
Cleone tiptoed, her hands on his shoulders.
"You are very, very wicked," she told him gravely.
"You are really, really wicked," she said to him seriously.
Sir Maurice kissed her.
Sir Maurice kissed her.
"So are you, minx, and I want you for my daughter. We are so well suited."
"So are you, flirt, and I want you for my daughter. We are a perfect match."
Cleone blushed fiery red and hid her face in his coat.
Cleone blushed bright red and buried her face in his coat.
Sir Maurice rode home wrapped in thought. Now and again he chuckled softly to himself, but when later he met his son he was as solemn as ever.
Sir Maurice rode home lost in thought. Occasionally, he chuckled softly to himself, but when he later met his son, he was as serious as ever.
Philip came into the library, riding-whip in hand. He had been on the fields all the morning, and Sir Maurice eyed his boots with disfavour. Philip sank into a chair.
Philip walked into the library, riding whip in hand. He had been out in the fields all morning, and Sir Maurice looked disapprovingly at his boots. Philip plopped down into a chair.
"Two of the big meadows are cut, sir. We should finish by next week." He glanced anxiously out of the window. "I hope the rain holds off."
"Two of the big meadows are cut, sir. We should wrap up by next week." He looked out the window, clearly worried. "I hope the rain stays away."
"Oh, it will," replied his father placidly.
"Oh, it will," his father replied calmly.
"I am not so sure. Last summer the hay was black. Did you—er—did you ride into the village?"
"I’m not so sure. Last summer the hay was black. Did you—uh—ride into the village?"
"I did."
"I did."
"And—and did you go to—Sharley House?"
"And—did you visit—Sharley House?"
"Ay."
"Yeah."
"Are they—did they accept?" Philip played with his whip, feigning unconcern.
"Did they accept?" Philip toyed with his whip, pretending to be unconcerned.
"They did. I met that fellow Bancroft."
"They did. I met that guy Bancroft."
"Oh!" said Philip. "Where?"
"Oh!" Philip said. "Where?"
"In the rose-garden," yawned Sir Maurice.
"In the rose garden," yawned Sir Maurice.
The whip fell to the ground.
The whip dropped to the ground.
"What? In the rose-garden? Whose rose-garden?"
"What? In the rose garden? Whose rose garden?"
"At Sharley House, of course."
"At Sharley House, of course."
"Where—was—What was he doing there?"
"Where was he doing there?"
"He was sitting in the arbour, talking to Cleone."
"He was sitting in the gazebo, talking to Cleone."
"Confound him!" growled Philip, as if his worst fears were realised. "What's he like?"
"Curse him!" Philip growled, as if his worst fears had come true. "What's he like?"
Sir Maurice glanced across at him.
Sir Maurice glanced over at him.
"He is about your height—perhaps a little taller. He—ah—seems to have a soft tongue and an engaging manner."
"He’s about your height—maybe a bit taller. He—uh—seems to have a gentle way of speaking and a charming personality."
"Oh, has he?" Philip's voice was startlingly grim.
"Oh, really?" Philip's voice was surprisingly serious.
"He and Cleone were renewing their old friendship."
"He and Cleone were rekindling their old friendship."
"Oh, were they? What old friendship? He was never our friend!"
"Oh, were they? What old friendship? He was never our friend!"
"No, I suppose not," said Sir Maurice innocently. "He is some six or seven years older than you, is he not?"
"No, I guess not," Sir Maurice said innocently. "He's about six or seven years older than you, right?"
"Five!" said Philip emphatically.
"Five!" Philip exclaimed emphatically.
"Only five? Of course, he looks and seems older, but he has seen more of the world, which accounts for it."
"Only five? Sure, he looks and seems older, but he has experienced more of the world, which explains it."
To this Philip vouchsafed no answer at all, but he looked at his father with some suspicion. Sir Maurice allowed two or three minutes to elapse before he spoke again.
To this, Philip didn’t respond at all, but he glanced at his father with some suspicion. Sir Maurice let two or three minutes go by before he spoke again.
"By the way, Philip, Bancroft dines with us on Wednesday."
"By the way, Philip, Bancroft is having dinner with us on Wednesday."
Up sprang Philip in great annoyance.
Up sprang Philip in great annoyance.
"What's that, sir? Dines here, and on Wednesday? Surely you did not invite the fellow?"
"What's that, sir? Dining here, and on Wednesday? Surely you didn't invite that guy?"
"But I did," answered Sir Maurice blandly. "Why not?"
"But I did," replied Sir Maurice casually. "Why not?"
"Why not? What do we want with him?"
"Why not? What do we want with him?"
"It remains to be seen." Sir Maurice hid a smile. "Bancroft is most desirous of meeting you."
"It’s yet to be determined." Sir Maurice concealed a grin. "Bancroft is really eager to meet you."
Philip made a sound betwixt a grunt and a snort.
Philip made a sound somewhere between a grunt and a snort.
"More like he wishes to pursue his acquaintance with Cl—Mistress Cleone," he retorted.
"More like he wants to get to know Cl—Mistress Cleone better," he shot back.
"Well, she's a pretty piece," said his father.
"Well, she's really attractive," said his father.
Philip glared at him.
Philip shot him a glare.
"If I find him annoying Cleone with his damned officious attentions, I'll—I'll—"
"If I find him bothering Cleone with his damn overbearing attention, I'll—I’ll—"
"Oh, I do not think she is annoyed," replied Sir Maurice.
"Oh, I don't think she's annoyed," replied Sir Maurice.
At that Philip stalked out of the room, leaving his father a prey to indecent mirth.
At that, Philip stormed out of the room, leaving his father vulnerable to inappropriate laughter.
FourFour
The Trouble Comes to a HeadThe Issue Reaches a Climax
At half-past five on Wednesday Mr. Henry Bancroft was ushered into the withdrawing-room at the Pride. He was, as he had intended he should be, the last to arrive.
At 5:30 on Wednesday, Mr. Henry Bancroft was shown into the sitting room at the Pride. He was, just as he had planned, the last one to arrive.
Sir Maurice stood in front of the empty grate, talking to Mr. Charteris; madam sat on a couch, her daughter beside her, and Philip nearby. They all looked up as Mr. Bancroft was announced, and Philip rose, for the first time in his life acutely conscious of an ill-fitting coat and unpowdered hair.
Sir Maurice stood in front of the empty fireplace, chatting with Mr. Charteris; the lady sat on a couch, her daughter next to her, and Philip nearby. They all looked up when Mr. Bancroft was announced, and Philip got up, suddenly aware for the first time of his ill-fitting coat and unstyled hair.
Mr. Bancroft was a dream of lilac and rose. He might have been dressed for a ball, thought Cleone. Diamonds and rubies flashed from his buckles, and from his cravat; a diamond clasp was above the riband that tied his wig. He minced forward daintily and bowed, one be-ringed hand over his heart.
Mr. Bancroft was a vision in lilac and rose. He looked like he was dressed for a ball, Cleone thought. Diamonds and rubies sparkled from his buckles and cravat; a diamond clasp sat above the ribbon that held his wig. He walked forward delicately and bowed, one ringed hand over his heart.
Sir Maurice came forward, very stately in black with touches of purple.
Sir Maurice stepped forward, quite dignified in black with hints of purple.
"Ah, Mr. Bancroft! I need not present you to the ladies, I know." He paused to allow Bancroft to throw a languishing glance towards the couch. "I think you and my son are not altogether unknown to one another?"
"Ah, Mr. Bancroft! I don’t need to introduce you to the ladies, I know." He paused to let Bancroft cast a longing look toward the couch. "I believe you and my son are somewhat acquainted, aren’t you?"
Bancroft turned on his heel to face Philip. He bowed again, slightly flourishing his handkerchief.
Bancroft turned around to face Philip. He bowed again, casually waving his handkerchief.
"My playmate of long ago," he murmured. "Your very obedient, Mr. Jettan."
"My playmate from long ago," he murmured. "You're very obedient, Mr. Jettan."
Philip returned the bow awkwardly.
Philip returned the bow clumsily.
"I am very pleased to meet you again, sir," he said, determined to be polite to this most obnoxious guest. "Do you—er—intend to make a long stay?"
"I’m really glad to see you again, sir," he said, trying to be polite to this incredibly annoying guest. "Do you—uh—plan on staying long?"
Bancroft raised his shoulders and spread out his hands.
Bancroft shrugged and opened his hands.
"I had thought not, sir, but now"—another glance was cast at Cleone—"I think—perhaps—!" He smiled, running quick, appraising eyes over Philip's person. "Do you know, sir, I swear I'd not have known you. You have grown prodigiously."
"I hadn't thought so, sir, but now"—another look was directed at Cleone—"I think—maybe—!" He smiled, quickly assessing Philip with his eyes. "You know, sir, I can't believe I didn't recognize you. You've changed a lot."
Cleone broke into the conversation.
Cleone jumped into the conversation.
"You were so much older than Philip or James or me, Mr. Bancroft!"
"You were so much older than Philip, James, or me, Mr. Bancroft!"
Instantly he swept round.
He quickly turned around.
"I thank you for the past tense, Mistress Cleone! At least, I am no longer so aged."
"I appreciate the past tense, Mistress Cleone! At least I'm not as old anymore."
"Why, sir, have you lost your years?" she asked.
"Why, sir, have you wasted your time?" she asked.
"In your company, yes, madam. Can you wonder?"
"In your company, yes, ma'am. Can you believe that?"
"Oh, I am monstrous flattered, sir!" Cleone spread out her fan and held it before her face.
"Oh, I'm so flattered, sir!" Cleone opened her fan and held it in front of her face.
"Not flattered, Mistress Cleone; justly appreciated."
"Not flattered, Mistress Cleone; just genuinely appreciated."
"La!" said Madam Charteris. "How can you say such things, Mr. Bancroft? I declare you will make my daughter vain!"
"La!" said Madam Charteris. "How can you say things like that, Mr. Bancroft? I swear you’re going to make my daughter conceited!"
"Vanity, madam, mates not with such beauty as that of your daughter," he retaliated. To the right he could see Philip, glowering, and his mischievous soul laughed. Then Sir Maurice claimed his attention, and he turned away.
"Vanity, ma'am, doesn't go well with a beauty like your daughter’s," he replied. To his right, he noticed Philip scowling, and a mischievous grin crossed his face. Then Sir Maurice demanded his attention, and he turned away.
Philip walked to the couch and stood behind it, resting his arm on the back. He leaned over Cleone with an air of possession.
Philip walked to the couch and stood behind it, resting his arm on the back. He leaned over Cleone with a sense of ownership.
"Pranked out mummer!" he muttered in her ear.
"You're such a prankster!" he whispered in her ear.
Cleone smiled up at him.
Cleone smiled at him.
"Why, sir, are you at variance with him in the matter of my looks?" she asked, and thereby bereft him of speech. Her smile turned to a look of reproach. "'Tis your cue, sir; am I to be slighted?"
"Why, sir, do you disagree with him about my appearance?" she asked, leaving him speechless. Her smile changed to a look of disapproval. "It's your turn, sir; am I to be ignored?"
A dull red crept to the roots of Philip's hair. He spoke lower still.
A dull red spread to the roots of Philip's hair. He spoke even quieter.
"You know—what I think of you, Cleone. I cannot—mouth what I feel—in pretty phrases."
"You know how I feel about you, Cleone. I can’t express what I feel in nice words."
A strangely tender light came into her eyes.
A strangely soft light appeared in her eyes.
"You might try, Philip," she said.
"You could give it a shot, Philip," she said.
"What, here? Not I! I am not one to sing your charms in public." He laughed shortly. "So that is what you desire?"
"What, here? Not a chance! I'm not the type to sing your praises in public." He chuckled briefly. "So that’s what you want?"
The tender light died.
The soft light faded away.
"No, sir. I desire you will not lean so close. You inconvenience me."
"No, sir. I would prefer it if you didn't lean in so close. It's making me uncomfortable."
Philip straightened at once, but he still stood behind her. Bancroft met his eyes and was quick to read the challenge they held. He smiled, twirling his eyeglass.
Philip straightened immediately, but he still stayed behind her. Bancroft caught his gaze and quickly understood the challenge in his eyes. He smiled, twirling his eyeglass.
When dinner was announced, Cleone was talking to Bancroft. It was but natural that he should offer her his arm, but to Philip it seemed a most officious, impudent action. Sir Maurice led Madam Charteris into the dining-room; Mr. Charteris and Philip brought up the rear.
When dinner was called, Cleone was chatting with Bancroft. It made sense for him to offer her his arm, but to Philip, it seemed like a really pushy and disrespectful move. Sir Maurice escorted Madam Charteris into the dining room, while Mr. Charteris and Philip followed behind.
From Philip's point of view the meal was not a success. Seated side by side, Cleone and Bancroft exchanged a flood of conversation. Philip, at the foot of the table, had on his right Mr. Bancroft, and on his left Mr. Charteris. To the latter he made grave conversation. Occasionally Bancroft dragged him into a discussion; once or twice Madam Charteris and Sir Maurice appealed to him. But Cleone seemed unaware of his existence. She was very gay, too; her eyes sparkled and shone, her cheeks were faintly flushed. She answered Mr. Bancroft's sallies with delightful little laughs and applause.
From Philip's perspective, the meal wasn't a success. Seated next to each other, Cleone and Bancroft chatted away. Philip, sitting at the foot of the table, had Mr. Bancroft on his right and Mr. Charteris on his left. He engaged in serious conversation with the latter. Occasionally, Bancroft pulled him into the discussion, and once or twice Madam Charteris and Sir Maurice turned to him for input. But Cleone seemed completely oblivious to him. She was so lively; her eyes sparkled and glowed, and her cheeks had a slight flush. She responded to Mr. Bancroft's jokes with charming little laughs and applause.
As the dinner proceeded, Philip was made to feel more than ever his own shortcomings. When he looked at Mr. Bancroft's white hands with their highly polished nails, and many rings, he compared them with his strong brown ones, tanned and—coarse? Covertly he inspected them; no, they were better hands than that nincompoop's, but his nails ... bah! only fops such as this puppy polished their nails!...
As dinner went on, Philip felt more aware than ever of his own flaws. When he glanced at Mr. Bancroft's pale hands with their shiny nails and numerous rings, he couldn't help but compare them to his own strong, brown hands, tanned and—rough? Secretly he examined them; no, they were better hands than that idiot's, but his nails ... ugh! Only shallow people like this guy polished their nails!...
The lilac satin of Mr. Bancroft's coat shimmered in the light of the candles. How tightly it fitted him across the shoulders! How heavily it was laced, and how full were its skirts! A coat for a drawing-room! Unconsciously Philip squared his shoulders. All that foaming lace ... more suited to a woman than to a man. The quizzing-glass ... abominable affectation! The jewels ... flaunting them in the country! Patched and painted, mincing, prattling puppy-dog! How could Cleone bear him so near, with his fat, soft hands, and his person reeking of some sickly scent?...
The lilac satin of Mr. Bancroft's coat sparkled in the candlelight. It fit him snugly across the shoulders! It was heavily laced, and its skirts were so full! A coat for a parlor! Without realizing it, Philip straightened his shoulders. All that frilly lace... more appropriate for a woman than a man. The quizzing-glass... such a ridiculous affectation! The jewels... showing them off in the country! Patched and painted, prancing, chatterbox! How could Cleone stand being so close to him, with his fat, soft hands and his body smelling of some sickly scent?...
Now he was talking of town and its allure, toying with the names of first one celebrity and then another. And Cleone drinking in the silly, smug talk!... Now hints at conquests made—veiled allusions to his own charms. Ape!—truckling, overdressed ape! Suddenly Philip wanted to throw his glass at Bancroft. He choked down the mad impulse, and strove to listen to Mr. Charteris.
Now he was chatting about the town and its appeal, casually mentioning one celebrity after another. And Cleone was soaking up the silly, self-satisfied conversation!... Now there were hints at conquests he had experienced—subtle suggestions of his own charms. What a phony!—a fawning, overdressed phony! Suddenly, Philip felt like throwing his glass at Bancroft. He swallowed the crazy urge and tried to pay attention to Mr. Charteris.
Back in the withdrawing-room again it was worse. Sir Maurice asked Cleone to sing, and she went to the spinet. Bancroft followed, to choose her music, to turn the pages, to gaze at her in frank admiration. Damn him, damn him, damn him!
Back in the drawing room, it was even worse. Sir Maurice asked Cleone to sing, and she went to the piano. Bancroft followed her, picking out her music, turning the pages, and looking at her with open admiration. Damn him, damn him, damn him!
The party came to an end at last; Philip was alone with his father. Sir Maurice leaned his chin in his hand, watching him amusedly. For a long while Philip said nothing, but presently he brought his eyes away from the window and looked at his father.
The party finally wrapped up; Philip was left alone with his dad. Sir Maurice propped his chin on his hand, watching him with amusement. For a while, Philip stayed quiet, but eventually, he shifted his gaze from the window and looked at his father.
"And that," he said bitingly, "is what you would have me. A conceited, painted puppy, fawning and leering on every woman that crosses his path!"
"And that," he said sharply, "is what you want me to be. A vain, superficial show-off, flirting and leering at every woman who crosses my path!"
"Not at all." Sir Maurice took out his snuff-box and opened it. "'Tis the last thing in the world I would have you."
"Not at all." Sir Maurice pulled out his snuff-box and opened it. "It's the absolute last thing I would want for you."
"You said—"
"You said—"
"I said I would have you a very perfect gentleman, knowing the world and its ways."
"I said I would make you a really perfect gentleman, understanding the world and how it works."
"Well?—"
"Well?"
"You perhaps conceive Mr. Bancroft a perfect gentleman?"
"You might think of Mr. Bancroft as a perfect gentleman?"
"Not I! 'Tis you who—"
"Not me! It's you who—"
Sir Maurice raised one delicate hand.
Sir Maurice raised one delicate hand.
"Pardon me! You choose to assume that I thought it. Mr. Bancroft is, as you so truly remark, a conceited, painted puppet. But he apes, so far as he is able, the thing that I am; that I wish you to become. You are a country-bumpkin, my dear; he is a coddled doll. Strive to become something betwixt the two."
"Pardon me! You seem to assume that I thought differently. Mr. Bancroft is, as you accurately put it, a conceited, superficial puppet. But he tries, as much as he can, to imitate what I am; what I want you to become. You're a simple country person, my dear; he’s a pampered doll. Aim to be something in between the two."
"I had sooner be what I am!"
"I would rather be who I am!"
"Which is a conceited oaf."
"Which is a cocky fool."
"Sir!"
"Excuse me!"
Sir Maurice rose, leaning on his cane.
Sir Maurice got up, leaning on his cane.
"Remain what you are, my son, but bethink you—which will Cleone prefer? Him who gives her graceful homage, and charms her ears with honeyed words, or him who is tongue-tied before her, who is careless of his appearance, and who treats her, not as a young and beautiful girl, but as his inevitable possession?"
"Stay true to yourself, my son, but think about this—who will Cleone prefer? The one who gives her elegant compliments and sweet talks her, or the one who is speechless around her, doesn’t care about how he looks, and treats her not as a young and beautiful girl, but as something he inevitably owns?"
Philip answered quickly.
Philip replied quickly.
"Cleone, sir, will—give herself where she pleases, but she is not one to over-rate the tricks of such as Bancroft."
"Cleone will go where she wants, but she's not one to be fooled by someone like Bancroft."
"Or to under-rate the discomforts of tying herself to one who is tied to the soil and his own pleasure," said Sir Maurice softly.
"Or to underestimate the challenges of committing to someone who is rooted to the land and his own enjoyment," Sir Maurice said softly.
The grey eyes met his, a trifle hurt.
The gray eyes met his, a bit hurt.
"I am selfish, Father? Because I will not become the thing I despise?"
"I’m selfish, Father? Because I won't become something I hate?"
"And narrow, Philip, to despise what you do not know."
"And it's narrow-minded, Philip, to look down on what you don't understand."
"Thank you!" The young voice was exceedingly bitter. "I am to be a painted popinjay! I tell you, sir, Cleone must take me as I am."
"Thank you!" The young voice was extremely bitter. "I am to be a painted parrot! I tell you, sir, Cleone must accept me as I am."
"Or leave you as you are," said Sir Maurice gently.
"Or leave you as you are," Sir Maurice said softly.
"A warning, sir?"
"A heads-up, sir?"
"That's for you to judge, child. And now I'll to bed." He paused, looking at his son.
"That's for you to decide, kid. Now I'm off to bed." He paused, looking at his son.
Philip went to him.
Philip went to see him.
"Good night, sir."
"Good night, sir."
Sir Maurice smiled, holding out his hand.
Sir Maurice smiled and extended his hand.
"Good night, my son."
"Good night, buddy."
Philip kissed his fingers.
Philip kissed his fingers.
Followed a week of disturbing trivialities. Mr. Bancroft was more often in Little Fittledean than at home, and most often at Sharley House. He there met Philip, not once, but many times, hostile and possessive. He laughed softly, and sought to engage Philip in a war of wits, but Philip's tongue was stiff and reluctant. So Mr. Bancroft made covert sport of him and renewed his attentions to Cleone.
Followed a week of unsettling little events. Mr. Bancroft spent more time in Little Fittledean than at home, and most often at Sharley House. There, he encountered Philip not just once, but many times, with a sense of hostility and possessiveness. He chuckled softly and tried to draw Philip into a battle of wits, but Philip was stiff and unwilling to engage. So, Mr. Bancroft took subtle jabs at him and shifted his focus back to Cleone.
Cleone herself was living in a strange whirl. There was much in Mr. Bancroft that displeased her; I do not think she ever had it in her mind to wed him, which was perhaps fortunate, as Mr. Bancroft certainly had it not in his. But homage is grateful to women, and ardent yet dainty love-making fascinating to the young. She played with Mr. Bancroft, but thought no less of Philip. Yet Philip contrived to irritate her. His air of ownership, his angry, reproachful looks, fired the spirit of coquetry within her. Mastery thrilled her, but a mastery that offered to take all, giving nothing, annoyed her. That Philip loved her to distraction, she knew; also she knew that Philip would expect her to bend before his will. He would not change, it would be she who must conform to his pleasure. Philip was determined to remain as he was, faithful but dull. She wanted all that he despised: life, gaiety, society, and frivolity. She weighed the question carefully, a little too carefully for a maid in love. She wanted Philip and she did not want him. As he was, she would have none of him; as she wished him to be, he might have her. But for the present she was no man's, and no man had the right to chide her. Philip had made a mistake in his wooing in showing her how much his own he thought her. All unwitting, he was paving the way to his own downfall.
Cleone was caught in a confusing situation. There were many things about Mr. Bancroft that she didn't like; I don't think she ever intended to marry him, which was probably a good thing, as Mr. Bancroft definitely didn't want to marry her either. But women appreciate admiration, and passionate yet delicate flirting is captivating for the young. She flirted with Mr. Bancroft, but her feelings for Philip remained. However, Philip managed to irritate her. His possessive attitude and his angry, accusatory looks ignited her playful spirit. She was thrilled by the idea of being pursued, but a pursuit that demanded everything while giving nothing annoyed her. She knew that Philip loved her deeply; she also knew he would expect her to submit to his desires. He wouldn't change; it would be her who had to adjust to what he wanted. Philip was committed to staying the same—loyal but boring. She longed for everything he looked down on: excitement, joy, social life, and silliness. She considered the situation carefully, perhaps too carefully for someone in love. She wanted Philip, but she didn’t want him. As he was, she wouldn't accept him; if he became the man she wished him to be, he might win her over. But for now, she belonged to no one, and no man had the right to criticize her. Philip had made a mistake in his pursuit by showing her how much he thought she belonged to him. Unintentionally, he was setting himself up for failure.
Despite the lisping conceit of Mr. Bancroft, his polished phrases and his elegancy when compared with Philip's brusqueness threw Philip in the shade. Mr. Bancroft could taunt and gibe at Philip, sure of triumph; Philip tied his tongue in knots and relapsed into silence, leaving Mr. Bancroft to shine in his victory. The man Cleone chose to wed must be a match for all, with words or swords. Cleone continued to smile upon Mr. Bancroft.
Despite Mr. Bancroft's insincere charm, his smooth talk and elegance made Philip's bluntness seem even more noticeable. Mr. Bancroft was confident he could tease and mock Philip, knowing he would come out on top; Philip would stumble over his words and fall silent, allowing Mr. Bancroft to bask in his win. The man Cleone chose to marry had to be capable of handling any opponent, whether with words or in a fight. Cleone kept smiling at Mr. Bancroft.
At the end of the week the trouble came to a head. In the garden of Sharley House, before Cleone, Mr. Bancroft threw veiled taunts at Philip, and very thinly veiled sneers. He continued to hold the younger man's lack of polish up to scorn, always smiling and urbane.
At the end of the week, the situation reached a peak. In the garden of Sharley House, in front of Cleone, Mr. Bancroft threw subtle insults at Philip, along with barely concealed sneers. He kept ridiculing the younger man's lack of sophistication, all while maintaining a polite and charming demeanor.
Cleone recognised the gleam in Philip's eye. She was a little frightened and sought to smooth over the breach. But when she presently retired to the house, Philip arrested Mr. Bancroft, who was following.
Cleone noticed the sparkle in Philip's eye. She felt a bit scared and tried to mend the rift. But when she eventually went back inside the house, Philip stopped Mr. Bancroft, who was trailing behind.
"A word with you, sir."
"A chat with you, sir."
Bancroft turned, brows raised, lips curled almost sneeringly.
Bancroft turned, eyebrows lifted,
Philip stood very straight, shoulders squared.
Philip stood tall, his shoulders back.
"You have seen fit to mock at me, sir—"
"You felt it was okay to make fun of me, sir—"
"I?" interpolated Bancroft languidly. "My dear sir!"
"I?" Bancroft interjected lazily. "My dear sir!"
"—and I resent it. There is that in your manner to which I object."
"—and I hate it. There's something about your attitude that I can't stand."
Bancroft's brows rose higher.
Bancroft's eyebrows lifted higher.
"To—which—you—object...." he echoed softly.
"To—which—you—object...." he repeated softly.
"I trust I make myself clear?" snapped Philip.
"I hope I'm being clear?" snapped Philip.
Bancroft raised his eyeglass. Through it he studied Philip from his toes to his head.
Bancroft lifted his eyeglass. Through it, he examined Philip from his toes to his head.
"Is it possible that you want satisfaction?" he drawled.
"Do you want satisfaction?" he said lazily.
"More than that," retorted Philip. "It is certain."
"Even more than that," Philip shot back. "It's definitely true."
Once again he was scrutinised. Mr. Bancroft's smile grew.
Once again, he was examined. Mr. Bancroft's smile widened.
"I do not fight with schoolboys," he said.
"I don’t fight with schoolboys," he said.
The colour flooded Philip's face.
Color flooded Philip's face.
"Perhaps because you are afraid," he said quickly, guarding his temper.
"Maybe it's because you're scared," he said quickly, keeping his cool.
"Perhaps," nodded Bancroft. "Yet I have not the reputation of a coward."
"Maybe," Bancroft nodded. "But I’m not known to be a coward."
Swift as a hawk Philip pounced.
Swift as a hawk, Philip dove in.
"You have, sir, as I well know, the reputation of a libertine!"
"You have, sir, as I know very well, the reputation of a womanizer!"
It was Bancroft's turn to flush.
It was Bancroft's turn to blush.
"I—beg—your—pardon?"
"Excuse me?"
"It is necessary," bowed Philip, enjoying himself now for the first time in many days.
"It’s necessary," Philip said, bowing, feeling amused for the first time in many days.
"You—impudent boy!" gasped Bancroft.
"You—insolent kid!" gasped Bancroft.
"I would sooner be that, sir, than an impudent, painted puppy."
"I would rather be that, sir, than a rude, superficial show-off."
Under his powder Bancroft was fiery red.
Under his makeup, Bancroft was bright red.
"I see you will have it, Mr. Jettan. I will meet you when and where you will."
"I see you're determined, Mr. Jettan. I'll meet you whenever and wherever you want."
Philip patted his sword-hilt, and Bancroft observed for the first time that he was wearing a sword.
Philip patted the hilt of his sword, and Bancroft noticed for the first time that he was carrying a sword.
"I have noticed, Mr. Bancroft, that you habitually don your sword. So I took the precaution of wearing mine. 'When' is now, and 'where' is yonder!" He pointed above the hedge that encircled the garden to the copse beyond. It was a very fine theatrical effect, and he was pleased with it.
"I’ve noticed, Mr. Bancroft, that you always wear your sword. So I decided to wear mine too. 'When' is now, and 'where' is over there!" He pointed above the hedge that surrounded the garden to the grove beyond. It was a great dramatic moment, and he was happy with it.
Bancroft sneered at him.
Bancroft scoffed at him.
"A trifle countrified, Mr. Jettan. Do you propose to dispense with such needless formalities as seconds?"
"A bit too rustic, Mr. Jettan. Are you suggesting we skip unnecessary formalities like seconds?"
"I think we can trust each other," said Philip grandly.
"I think we can trust each other," Philip said confidently.
"Then pray lead the way," bowed Bancroft.
"Then please lead the way," Bancroft said, bowing.
What followed was not so fine. Bancroft was proficient in the art of the duello; Philip had never fought in his life. Fencing had never interested him, and Sir Maurice had long since despaired of teaching him anything more than the rudiments. However, he was very angry and very reckless, while Bancroft thought to play with him. He thrust so wildly and so insanely that Bancroft was taken unawares and received a fine slash across the arm. After that he fenced more carefully, and in a very short time pinked Philip neatly and artistically above the elbow of his sword arm. As Philip's blade wavered and fell, he wiped his own on his handkerchief, sheathed it, and bowed.
What happened next wasn’t great. Bancroft was skilled in the art of dueling; Philip had never fought before. He had never been interested in fencing, and Sir Maurice had long given up trying to teach him anything beyond the basics. However, Philip was really angry and acted recklessly, while Bancroft thought he could play around with him. Philip attacked so wildly and frantically that Bancroft was caught off guard and got a good slash across his arm. After that, Bancroft fenced more cautiously, and in no time, he neatly and skillfully poked Philip right above the elbow of his sword arm. As Philip’s blade drooped and dropped, he wiped his own on his handkerchief, sheathed it, and bowed.
"Let this be a lesson to you, sir," he said, and walked away before Philip could pick up his sword.
"Let this be a lesson for you, man," he said, and walked away before Philip could grab his sword.
Twenty minutes later Philip walked into the hall of Sharley House, a handkerchief tied tightly round his arm, and asked for Mistress Cleone. On being told that she was in the parlour, he stalked in upon her.
Twenty minutes later, Philip walked into the hall of Sharley House, a handkerchief tied tightly around his arm, and asked for Mistress Cleone. When he was told that she was in the parlor, he strode in on her.
Cleone's eyes flew to his crooked arm.
Cleone's eyes darted to his crooked arm.
"Oh!" she cried, and half rose. "What—what have you done? You are hurt!"
"Oh!" she exclaimed, sitting up halfway. "What—what did you do? You're hurt!"
"It is less than nothing, I thank you," replied Philip. "I want you to answer me plainly, Cleone. What is that fellow to you?"
"It’s nothing, really, thank you," Philip replied. "I need you to answer me clearly, Cleone. What is that guy to you?"
Cleone sat down again. Her eyes flashed; Philip was nearer than ever to his downfall.
Cleone sat down again. Her eyes lit up; Philip was closer than ever to his downfall.
"I entirely fail to understand you, sir," she answered.
"I totally don't understand you, sir," she replied.
"Do you love that—that prancing ninny?" asked Philip.
"Do you love that—that prancing fool?" asked Philip.
"I consider such a question an—an impertinence!" cried Cleone. "What right have you to ask me such a thing?"
"I think that's such an impertinent question!" Cleone exclaimed. "What right do you have to ask me something like that?"
Philip's brows met across the bridge of his nose.
Philip's eyebrows knitted together over the bridge of his nose.
"You do love him?"
"Do you love him?"
"No, I don't! I mean—Oh, how dare you?"
"No, I don't! I mean—Oh, how could you?"
Philip came closer. The frown faded.
Philip stepped closer. The frown disappeared.
"Cleone—do you—could you—love me?"
"Cleone—do you—can you—love me?"
Cleone was silent.
Cleone was quiet.
Closer still came Philip, and spoke rather huskily.
Closer still came Philip, and he spoke in a husky voice.
"Will you—marry me, Cleone?"
"Will you marry me, Cleone?"
Still silence, but the blue eyes were downcast.
Still silent, but the blue eyes were looking down.
"Cleone," blundered Philip, "you—don't want a—mincing, powdered—beau."
"Cleone," Philip stammered, "you—don’t want a—fancy, powdered—fancy guy."
"I do not want a—a—raw—country-bumpkin," she said cruelly.
"I don't want a—a—rude—country bumpkin," she said cruelly.
Philip drew himself up.
Philip stood tall.
"That is what you think me, Cleone?"
"Is that what you think of me, Cleone?"
Something in his voice brought tears to her eyes.
Something in his voice made her tears well up.
"I—no—I—oh, Philip, I could not marry you as you are!"
"I—no—I—oh, Philip, I can’t marry you as you are!"
"No?" Philip spoke very evenly. "But if I became—your ideal—you could marry me?"
"No?" Philip said calmly. "But if I became—your ideal—you could marry me?"
"I—oh, you should not—ask such questions!"
"I—oh, you really shouldn't—ask questions like that!"
"As I am—you'll none of me. You do not want—an honest man's love. You want the pretty compliments of a doll. If I will learn to be—a doll—you'll wed me. Well, I will learn. You shall not be—annoyed—by an honest man's love—any longer. I will go to London—and one day I'll return. Farewell, Cleone."
"As I am—you won't have any part of me. You don't want—an honest man's love. You want the sweet compliments of a doll. If I learn to be—a doll—you'll marry me. Fine, I will learn. You won't be—bothered—by an honest man's love—anymore. I'm going to London—and one day I'll come back. Goodbye, Cleone."
"Oh—goodness—are you—going to town?" she gasped.
"Oh my gosh, are you heading to town?" she gasped.
"Since that is your desire, yes," he answered.
"Since that’s what you want, sure," he replied.
She held out her hand, and when he kissed it her fingers clung for an instant.
She extended her hand, and when he kissed it, her fingers lingered for a moment.
"Come back to me, Philip," she whispered.
"Come back to me, Philip," she said softly.
He bowed, still holding her hand, and then, without a word, released it, and marched out, very dignified. It was another fine tragic effect, but Cleone, when the door closed behind him, broke into an hysterical laugh. She was rather amazed, and a little apprehensive.
He bowed, still holding her hand, and then, without saying anything, let it go and walked out, looking very dignified. It was another powerful dramatic moment, but Cleone, when the door closed behind him, burst into hysterical laughter. She felt a bit surprised and somewhat anxious.
FiveFive
In Which Philip Finds That His Uncle Is More Sympathetic Than His
FatherIn Which Philip Realizes That His Uncle is More Understanding Than His Father
Home went Philip, a prey to conflicting emotions. He was angry with Cleone, and hurt at what he termed her fickleness, but she was very lovely, and still wholly desirable. Never until now had he realised how necessary she was to his happiness. She would not marry him unless he reformed, learned to behave like Bancroft—that was what she meant. She did not love him as he was; she wanted polish, and frills and furbelows. Philip's lips tightened. She should have them—but he was very, very angry. Then he thought of his father, and the anger grew. What right had these two to seek to change him into something that was utterly insincere, trifling, and unmanly? His father would be rejoiced to hear that he was going "to become a gentleman." Even he had no use for Philip as he was. Well, they should have what they wanted—and then perhaps they would be sorry. In a wave of self-pity he considered how dearly he loved these two people. He wanted neither to change, he loved them for what they were; but they.... He felt very sore and ill-used. Something else there was that troubled him. He had set about the task of punishing Mr. Bancroft, and Mr. Bancroft had ended by punishing him. No pleasant thought, that. Bancroft was master not only of words but of swords; he, Philip, was master of neither. He brooded over the question, chafed and irritable. And so came home to Sir Maurice.
Home went Philip, overwhelmed by conflicting feelings. He was angry with Cleone and hurt by what he called her fickleness, but she was still incredibly beautiful and completely desirable. He had never realized until now how essential she was to his happiness. She wouldn’t marry him unless he changed, learned to act like Bancroft—that was what she meant. She didn’t love him as he was; she wanted refinement, flair, and sophistication. Philip's lips tightened. She would get those things—but he was very, very angry. Then he thought of his father, and the anger intensified. What right did these two have to try to change him into someone completely insincere, trivial, and unmanly? His father would be thrilled to hear that he was going "to become a gentleman." Even he had no use for Philip as he was. Well, they would get what they wanted—and then maybe they would regret it. In a wave of self-pity, he thought about how much he loved these two people. He didn’t want either of them to change; he loved them for who they were; but they.... He felt deeply hurt and mistreated. There was something else bothering him, too. He had set out to punish Mr. Bancroft, and in the end, Mr. Bancroft had punished him. Not a comforting thought. Bancroft was skilled not only with words but with weapons; he, Philip, was skilled at neither. He dwelled on this problem, feeling restless and irritable. And so he came home to Sir Maurice.
He found him seated on the terrace, reading Juvenal. Sir Maurice, glancing up, observed Philip's sling. He said nothing, but his eyes gleamed an instant.
He saw him sitting on the terrace, reading Juvenal. Sir Maurice, looking up, noticed Philip's sling. He didn't say anything, but his eyes sparkled for a moment.
Philip threw himself down upon a bench.
Philip flopped down onto a bench.
"Well, sir, Bancroft and I have met."
"Well, sir, Bancroft and I have met."
"I thought it would come," nodded his father.
"I thought it would come," his father nodded.
"I'm no match for him. He—pinked me with some ease."
"I'm no match for him. He easily took me down."
Again Sir Maurice nodded.
Again, Sir Maurice nodded.
"Also"—Philip spoke with difficulty—"Cleone—will have none of me—as I am." He looked across at his father with some bitterness. "As you prophesied, sir, she prefers the attentions of such as Bancroft."
"Also"—Philip spoke with difficulty—"Cleone—wants nothing to do with me—as I am." He glanced at his father with some bitterness. "As you predicted, sir, she prefers the attention of someone like Bancroft."
"And so—?"
"And so?"
Philip was silent.
Philip was quiet.
"And so Mr. Jettan withdraws from the lists. Very fine," added Sir Maurice.
"And so Mr. Jettan withdraws from the competition. Very good," added Sir Maurice.
"Have I said so, sir?" Philip spoke sharply. "Cleone desires a beau—she shall have one! I have told her that I shall not come to her until I am what—she thinks—is her desire! I will show her and you that I am not the dull-witted bumpkin you think me, fit for nothing better than"—he mimicked his father's tone—"to till the earth! I'll learn to be the painted fop you'd like to see me! Neither you nor she shall be offended longer by the sight of me as I am!"
"Did I say that, sir?" Philip replied sharply. "Cleone wants a boyfriend—she'll get one! I’ve told her I won't see her until I become what she thinks is her ideal! I'll prove to her and you that I’m not the clueless fool you believe I am, good for nothing but"—he imitated his father's tone—"to work the land! I’ll learn to be the polished dandy you want me to be! Neither you nor she will have to put up with the way I am any longer!"
"Now, here's a heat!" remarked Sir Maurice. "So you'll to London, boy? To your uncle?"
"Wow, what a heat!" said Sir Maurice. "So you're heading to London, kid? To see your uncle?"
Philip shrugged.
Philip shrugged.
"As well to him as any other. I care not."
"As much to him as to anyone else. I don't care."
"That's the wrong spirit for your emprise," said Sir Maurice, a laugh in his eyes. "You must enter into your venture heart and soul."
"That's the wrong mindset for your mission," said Sir Maurice, a laugh in his eyes. "You need to commit to your venture body and soul."
Philip flung out his arm.
Philip threw his arm out.
"My heart's here, sir, at home!"
"My heart is here, sir, at home!"
"It's also at Sharley House," said his father dryly, "or why do you go to London?"
"It's also at Sharley House," his father said dryly, "so why are you going to London?"
"Ay, it's there! And I have the felicity of knowing that Cleone cares not one snap of her fingers for me! She trifles with me, and makes sport of me for her amusement!"
"Yes, it's true! And I'm happy to know that Cleone doesn't care about me at all! She treats me like a joke and makes fun of me just for her entertainment!"
"Tra-la-la-la!" said Sir Maurice. "Then why go to London?"
"Tra-la-la-la!" said Sir Maurice. "So why head to London?"
"To show her that I am not the brainless oaf she thinks me!" answered Philip, and marched off.
"To prove to her that I'm not the clueless idiot she thinks I am!" replied Philip, and marched away.
Sir Maurice returned to Juvenal.
Sir Maurice returned to Juvenal.
Not until his arm was healed did Philip set forth to London town. He parted amicably enough from his father, who gave him much advice, many introductions, and his blessing. Cleone he did not see at all, but when he had gone she went up to the Pride and held Sir Maurice's hand very tightly. She shed a few tears; also she laughed a little. As for Sir Maurice—well, he chided himself for a sentimental old fool, but with Philip's departure had come a void which could only be filled by Philip's return.
Not until his arm was healed did Philip head to London. He said goodbye to his father on good terms, who gave him lots of advice, several introductions, and his blessing. He didn’t see Cleone at all, but after he left, she went up to the Pride and held Sir Maurice’s hand tightly. She shed a few tears and also laughed a little. As for Sir Maurice—he scolded himself for being a sentimental old fool, but with Philip gone, there was a gap that could only be filled by Philip’s return.
Tom was breakfasting when his nephew was announced. It was noon, but Tom had spent a strenuous night. Philip walked into the room, under the gloomy eye of Moggat, travel-stained and stiff from the saddle. He was quite unexpected, but his uncle showed no surprise at seeing him.
Tom was having breakfast when his nephew arrived. It was noon, but Tom had a tiring night. Philip walked into the room, under the watchful gaze of Moggat, looking worn out and stiff from riding. He was a surprise, but his uncle didn’t seem shocked to see him.
"Well met, Philip, my boy! What's to do now?"
"Hey there, Philip, my boy! What's going on now?"
Philip sank into a chair.
Philip collapsed into a chair.
"I'll tell you when I'm fed," he grinned. "That sirloin pleases my eye."
"I'll let you know when I'm full," he grinned. "That sirloin looks great to me."
"Not an artistic colour," said Tom, studying it, "but appetising, I grant you."
"Not a color for art," said Tom, examining it, "but I admit it's appetizing."
"Artistic be damned!" said Philip, attacking it. Then he frowned. "H'm! No, Tom, 'tis a displeasing blend—red and brown."
"Artistic be damned!" said Philip, attacking it. Then he frowned. "Hmm! No, Tom, it's a bad mix—red and brown."
Tom looked at him in surprise.
Tom stared at him in surprise.
"What's colour to you, Philip?"
"What does color mean to you, Philip?"
"Naught, God help me," answered Philip, and fell to with a will.
"Nothin', God help me," replied Philip, and got to work with determination.
"I echo that sentiment," said Tom. "How does your father?"
"I agree with that," Tom said. "What about your dad?"
"Well enough; he sends you his love."
"Alright; he sends you his love."
Tom thereupon buried himself in the mass of correspondence that lay by his plate. When he came to the end, Philip had finished his repast. Tom pushed back his chair.
Tom then immersed himself in the pile of letters that were beside his plate. By the time he was done, Philip had finished his meal. Tom pushed his chair back.
"Well, Philip, what brings you here? Moggat, you rascal, away with you!"
"Well, Philip, what brings you here? Moggat, you troublemaker, get out of here!"
Philip waited until the door had closed upon Moggat's reluctant back.
Philip waited until the door had closed behind Moggat's unwilling back.
"I've—to learn to be—a gentleman," he said.
"I’ve—learned to be—a gentleman," he said.
Tom stared at him. Then he burst out laughing.
Tom looked at him. Then he started laughing.
"God ha' mercy, Philip, has it come to that?"
"God have mercy, Philip, has it really come to this?"
"I do not take your meaning," said Philip crossly.
"I don't understand what you mean," Philip said angrily.
"What! It's not a petticoat?"
"What! It's not a slip?"
"Tom, I'll thank you to—to—be quiet!"
"Tom, I'd appreciate it if you could just be quiet!"
Tom choked his laughter.
Tom stifled his laughter.
"Oh, I'm dumb! How do you propose to set about the task?"
"Oh, I'm such an idiot! How do you suggest we tackle this task?"
"'Tis what I want to know, Tom."
"'It's what I want to know, Tom."
"And I'm to teach you?"
"And I'm supposed to teach you?"
Philip hesitated.
Philip paused.
"Is it perhaps—a thing I can best learn alone?" he asked, surprisingly diffident.
"Could it be something I should learn on my own?" he asked, surprisingly hesitant.
"What is it exactly you want to learn?"
"What do you want to learn, exactly?"
"To become a gentleman. Have I not said it?"
"To become a gentleman. Haven't I mentioned that?"
"Odd rot, what are ye now?"
"Strange rot, what are you now?"
Philip's lips curled.
Philip smirked.
"I have it on the best authority, Tom, that I am a clumsy, witless clodhopper."
"I've been told by reliable sources, Tom, that I'm a clumsy, witless oaf."
His uncle regarded him with some kindliness.
His uncle looked at him with a bit of kindness.
"Little vixen," he remarked sapiently.
"Little vixen," he remarked wisely.
"I beg your pardon?" Philip was cold.
"I beg your pardon?" Philip said coldly.
"Not at all," said Tom hastily. "So Maurice has been at you again, eh? Now, Philip, lad, come off your pinnacle and be sensible, for God's sake! What do ye want?"
"Not at all," Tom said quickly. "So Maurice has been bothering you again, huh? Now, Philip, come down from your high horse and be reasonable, for God's sake! What do you want?"
"I want, or rather, they—he—wants me to learn how to dress, how to walk across a room, how to play with words, how to make love to women, how to bow, how to—"
"I want, or rather, they—he—wants me to learn how to dress, how to walk across a room, how to play with words, how to make love to women, how to bow, how to—"
"Oh, stop, stop!" cried Tom. "I have the whole picture! And it's no easy task, my boy. It will take you years to learn."
"Oh, stop, stop!" Tom exclaimed. "I have the entire picture! And it's not an easy job, kid. It will take you years to figure it out."
"Why, I trust you're pessimistic, sir," said Philip, "for I intend to acquire all these arts—within a year."
"Well, I hope you're feeling pessimistic, sir," said Philip, "because I'm planning to master all these skills—within a year."
"Well, I like your spirit," acknowledged Tom. "Take some more ale, lad, and let me have the whole story."
"Well, I like your vibe," Tom said. "Have some more ale, man, and give me the full story."
This advice Philip saw fit to follow. In a very short time he found that he had unburdened his sore heart to an astonishingly sympathetic uncle. Tom forbore to laugh—although now and then he was seized by an inward paroxysm which he had much ado to choke down. When Philip came to the end of his recital and stared gloomily across at him, he tapped his teeth with one polished finger-nail and looked exceeding wise.
This was advice Philip decided to take. Before long, he realized that he had shared his heavy heart with an incredibly understanding uncle. Tom held back his laughter—even though occasionally he was hit by an internal fit that he struggled to suppress. When Philip finished his story and glanced at him, looking glum, Tom tapped his teeth with one shiny fingernail and looked very wise.
"My opinion is, Philip, that you are the best of all us Jettans, but that's neither here nor there. Now it seems to me that the folk at home don't appreciate your sterling qualities—"
"My opinion is, Philip, that you are the best of all us Jettans, but that's beside the point. Now it seems to me that the people back home don't recognize your true worth—"
"Oh, 'tis not my qualities they object to! 'Tis my lack of vice."
"Oh, it's not my qualities they dislike! It's my lack of faults."
"Don't interrupt my peroration, lad. They think you a noble—what was the word you used?—clodhopper. 'Tis marvellously apt. They doubt your ability to shine in society. 'Tis for us to prove them to be mistaken. You must surprise them."
"Don't interrupt my speech, kid. They think you’re a noble—what was the word you used?—country bumpkin. It’s incredibly fitting. They doubt your ability to stand out in society. It’s our job to prove them wrong. You need to surprise them."
"I doubt I shall," said Philip, with the glimmering of a smile.
"I don't think I will," said Philip, with a hint of a smile.
Tom was wrapped in thought; his eyes ran over his nephew's form appraisingly.
Tom was deep in thought, his eyes scanning his nephew's figure critically.
"Ye've a fine figure, and good legs. Your hands?"
"You have a great figure and nice legs. What about your hands?"
Philip extended them, laughing.
Philip laughed and extended them.
"Um! a little attention, and I'd not wish to see better. Like all the Jettans, you are passable of countenance, not to say handsome."
"Um! with a little attention, I wouldn't want to see anything better. Like all the Jettans, you look decent, not to mention attractive."
"Am I?" Philip was startled. "I never knew that before!"
"Am I?" Philip was surprised. "I had no idea about that before!"
"Then ye know it now. You're the spit of your father in his young days. Gad, what days they were! Before I grew fat," he added sadly. "But I wander, I wander. Maurice and the petticoat—what's the girl's name?"
"Then you know it now. You look just like your father did when he was young. Wow, what days those were! Before I got fat," he added sadly. "But I'm rambling, I'm rambling. Maurice and the girl in the dress—what's her name?"
"I don't see why you should assu—"
"I don't see why you should ease—"
"Don't be a fool, lad! It's that fair chit, eh? Charlotte—no, damn it, some heathenish name!"
"Don't be an idiot, kid! It's that pretty girl, right? Charlotte—no, damn it, some terrible name!"
"Cleone," supplied Philip, submitting.
"Cleone," Philip said, yielding.
"Ay, that's it—Cleone. Well, Maurice and Cleone think that ye'll gain a little polish and some style. What you must do is excel. Excel!"
"Yeah, that's right—Cleone. Well, Maurice and Cleone believe you'll gain a bit of polish and some style. What you need to do is stand out. Stand out!"
"I doubt I could not," said Philip. "And, indeed, I've no mind to."
"I doubt I couldn't," said Philip. "And, honestly, I have no intention of doing so."
"Then I've done with you." Tom leaned back in his chair with an air of finality.
"Then I'm done with you." Tom leaned back in his chair with a sense of finality.
"No, no, Tom! You must help me!"
"No, no, Tom! You have to help me!"
A stern eye was fixed on him.
A serious gaze was directed at him.
"Ye must put yourself in my hands, then."
"You need to put yourself in my hands, then."
"Ay, but—"
"Yeah, but—"
"Completely," said Tom inexorably.
"Completely," Tom said firmly.
Philip collapsed.
Philip passed out.
"Oh, very well!"
"Oh, fine!"
The round, good-tempered face lost its unaccustomed severity. Tom was again wrapped in thought.
The round, friendly face relaxed its unfamiliar seriousness. Tom was once again deep in thought.
"Paris," he said at length, to the bewilderment of his nephew. "You must go there," he explained.
"Paris," he finally said, leaving his nephew confused. "You have to go there," he clarified.
Philip was horrified.
Philip was shocked.
"What! I? To Paris? Never!"
"What! Me? To Paris? No way!"
"Then I wash my—"
"Then I wash my hands—"
"But, Tom, consider! I know so little French!"
"But, Tom, think about it! I barely know any French!"
"The more reason."
"All the more reason."
"But—but—damn it, I say I will not!"
"But—but—damn it, I said I won't!"
Tom yawned.
Tom yawned.
"As ye will."
"As you wish."
Philip became more and more unhappy.
Philip grew more unhappy.
"Why should I go to Paris?" he growled.
"Why should I go to Paris?" he muttered.
"You're like a surly bear," reproved Tom. "Where else would you go?"
"You're like a grumpy bear," Tom scolded. "Where else would you go?"
"Can't I—surely I can learn all I want here?"
"Can't I—of course I can learn everything I want here?"
"Ay, and have all your friends nudging each other as you transform from what you are to what you are to become!"
"Aha, and have all your friends nudging each other as you change from who you are to who you are going to be!"
Philip had not thought of that. He relapsed into sulky silence.
Philip hadn't considered that. He fell back into a sulky silence.
"To Paris," resumed Tom, "within the week. Luckily, you've more money than is good for you. You've no need to pinch and scrape. I'll take you, clothe you, and introduce you."
"To Paris," Tom continued, "within the week. Fortunately, you have more money than you really need. You don't have to worry about saving every penny. I'll take care of you, get you clothes, and introduce you."
Philip brightened.
Philip lit up.
"Will you? That's devilish good of you, Tom!"
"Will you? That’s really kind of you, Tom!"
"It is," agreed Tom. "But I dare swear I'll find entertainment there." He chuckled. "And not a word to your father or to anyone. You'll vanish, and when you reappear no one will know you."
"It is," Tom agreed. "But I bet I'll find something fun there." He laughed. "And you won't say a word to your dad or anyone else. You'll disappear, and when you come back, no one will recognize you."
This dazzling prospect did not appear to allure Philip. He sighed heavily.
This amazing opportunity didn't seem to attract Philip. He sighed deeply.
"I suppose I must do it. But—" He rose and walked to the window. "It's all that I despise and that I detest. Mere love—does not suffice. Well, we shall see." He thrust his hands deep in his pockets. "The thing they want me to be is neither noble nor estimable. They—he—they—don't care what may be a man's reputation or his character! He must speak them softly, and charm their ears with silly compliments, and their eyes with pretty silks and satins. Naught else is of consequence. Faugh!"
"I guess I have to do it. But—" He stood up and walked to the window. "It’s everything I hate and detest. Just love—it's not enough. Well, we’ll see." He shoved his hands deep in his pockets. "What they want me to be is neither admirable nor respectable. They—he—they—don’t care about a man’s reputation or character! He has to flatter them softly and win their ears with silly compliments, and their eyes with nice fabrics and shiny materials. Nothing else matters. Ugh!"
"Ay, you're taking it hard," nodded his uncle. "But they're all the same, lad—bless 'em!"
"Yeah, you’re taking it hard," his uncle nodded. "But they're all the same, kid—bless them!"
"I thought—this one—was different."
"I thought this one was different."
"More fool you," said Tom cynically.
"You're such a fool," Tom said sarcastically.
SixSix
The Beginning of the TransformationThe Start of the Change
Philip stood in the middle of the floor, expostulating. A sleek valet was kneeling before him, coaxing his gold-clocked stockings over the knee of his small-clothes, and a middle-aged exquisite was arranging his Mechlin cravat for the seventh time, a frown crinkling his forehead, and French oaths proceeding from his tinted lips. Mr. Thomas Jettan was giving the nails of Philip's right hand a last, lingering polish. And Philip, supremely miserable, expostulated in vain.
Philip stood in the middle of the room, arguing. A stylish valet was kneeling in front of him, pulling his gold-clocked stockings over the knee of his trousers, and a middle-aged dandy was adjusting his Mechlin cravat for the seventh time, a frown creasing his forehead, while French curses came from his painted lips. Mr. Thomas Jettan was giving the nails of Philip's right hand a final, long polish. And Philip, utterly miserable, protested to no avail.
François sat back on his heels and eyed Philip's legs adoringly.
François sat back on his heels and admired Philip's legs with affection.
"But of an excellence, m'sieur! So perfect a calf, m'sieur! So vairy fine a laig," he explained in English.
"But what an excellence, sir! Such a perfect calf, sir! Such a very fine leg," he explained in English.
Philip tried to squint down at them, and was rewarded by an impatient exclamation from the gentleman who was wrestling with his cravat.
Philip tried to squint down at them and got an annoyed shout from the man struggling with his tie.
"Tais—toi, imbécile! 'Ow is it zat I shall arrange your cravat if you tweest and turn like zis? Lift your chin, Philippe!"
Shut up, you idiot! 'How am I supposed to tie your cravat if you twist and turn like this? Lift your chin, Philippe!"
"Mais, monsieur, je—je—cela me donne—mal au cou."
"But, sir, I—I—this is giving me—pain in my neck."
"Il faut souffrir pour être bel," replied the Marquis severely.
"You have to suffer to be beautiful," replied the Marquis sternly.
"So it seems," said Philip irritably. "Tom, for God's sake, have done!"
"So it seems," Philip said irritably. "Tom, for God's sake, stop!"
His uncle chuckled.
His uncle laughed.
"I've finished, never fear. Jean, that is wonderful!"
"I’m done, no worries. Jean, that’s amazing!"
Le Marquis de Château-Banvau stepped back to view his handiwork.
Le Marquis de Château-Banvau took a step back to admire his work.
"I am not altogether satisfied," he said musingly.
"I’m not completely satisfied," he said thoughtfully.
Philip warded him off.
Philip pushed him away.
"No, no, m'sieur! I am sure it is perfection!"
"No, no, sir! I'm certain it's perfect!"
The Marquis disregarded him. Once more his nimble fingers busied themselves amongst the folds of soft lace. His eyes gleamed suddenly.
The Marquis ignored him. Once again, his quick fingers worked through the soft lace. His eyes suddenly sparkled.
"It is well! François, the sapphire pin! Quickly!"
"It’s all good! François, the sapphire pin! Hurry up!"
The valet held it out. He and Tom watched anxiously as the Marquis' hand hovered, uncertain. Philip felt that this was a supreme moment; he held his breath. Then the pin was fixed with one unerring movement, and the two onlookers drew deep breaths of relief.
The valet extended it. He and Tom watched nervously as the Marquis' hand lingered, unsure. Philip sensed that this was a crucial moment; he held his breath. Then the pin was secured with one precise movement, and the two spectators exhaled in relief.
The Marquis nodded.
The Marquis agreed.
"Yes, Tom, you are right. It is a triumph. Sit down, Philippe."
"Yes, Tom, you're right. It's a victory. Take a seat, Philippe."
Philip sank into a chair by the dressing-table.
Philip sank into a chair by the vanity.
"What now? Have you nearly finished?"
"What’s next? Are you almost done?"
"Now the rouge. François, haste!"
"Now the blush. François, hurry!"
Philip tried to rebel.
Philip tried to resist.
"I will not be painted and powdered!"
"I won't be dressed up and made up!"
The Marquis fixed him with a cold eye.
The Marquis stared at him with a cold gaze.
"Plaît—il?"
"Please—he?"
"M'sieur—I—I will not!"
"Sir—I—I won't!"
"Philippe—if it were not for the love I bear your papa, I would leave you zis minute. You will do as I say, hein?"
"Philippe—if it weren't for the love I have for your dad, I would leave you right this minute. You will do what I say, right?"
"But, m'sieur, can I not go without paint?"
"But, sir, can't I go without paint?"
"You can not."
"You can't."
Philip smiled ruefully.
Philip smiled wryly.
"Then do your worst!"
"Then bring it on!"
"It is not my worst, ingrat. It is my best!"
"It’s not my worst, ingrat. It’s my best!"
"Your best, then. I am really very grateful, sir."
"Your best, then. I truly appreciate it, sir."
The Marquis' lips twitched. He signed to François.
The Marquis' lips twitched. He gestured to François.
Under his deft hands Philip squirmed and screwed up his face. He complained that the haresfoot tickled him, and he winced when the Marquis pressed two patches on his face. When François dusted his cheeks with powder he sneezed, and when a single sapphire ear-ring was placed in his left ear he scowled and muttered direfully.
Under his skilled hands, Philip squirmed and contorted his face. He complained that the haresfoot was tickling him, and he winced when the Marquis pressed two patches on his face. When François dusted his cheeks with powder, he sneezed, and when a single sapphire earring was placed in his left ear, he scowled and muttered ominously.
But the supreme torture was to come. He discovered that it required the united energies of the three men to coax him into his coat. When at last it was on he assured them it would split across the shoulders if he so much as moved a finger.
But the ultimate torture was yet to come. He realized that it took all three men working together to help him into his coat. When it was finally on, he told them it would rip across the shoulders if he even moved a finger.
The Marquis found him fort amusant, but troublesome.
The Marquis found him very amusing, but annoying.
"Forget it, little fool!"
"Forget it, you little fool!"
"Forget it?" cried Philip. "How can I forget it when it prevents my moving?"
"Forget it?" shouted Philip. "How can I forget it when it stops me from moving?"
"Quelle absurdité! The sword, Tom!"
"How absurd! The sword, Tom!"
"How can I dance in a sword?" protested Philip.
"How can I dance with a sword?" protested Philip.
"It is de rigueur," said the Marquis.
"It is de rigueur," said the Marquis.
Philip fingered the jewelled hilt.
Philip traced the jeweled hilt.
"A pretty plaything," he said. "I have never spent so much money on fripperies before."
"A lovely trinket," he said. "I've never spent this much money on fancy stuff before."
François arranged the full skirts of his coat about the sword, and Tom slipped rings on to Philip's fingers. A point-edged hat was put into his hand, an enamelled snuff-box, and a handkerchief.
François adjusted the full skirts of his coat around the sword, and Tom placed rings onto Philip's fingers. A pointed hat was handed to him, along with an enamel snuff box and a handkerchief.
Thomas looked at the Marquis, the Marquis nodded complacently. He led Philip to a long glass.
Thomas looked at the Marquis, and the Marquis nodded with satisfaction. He guided Philip to a long glass.
"Well, my friend?"
"What's up, my friend?"
But Philip said never a word. He stared and stared again at his reflection. He could not believe that it was himself. He saw a tall, slight figure dressed in a pale blue satin coat, and white small-clothes, flowered waistcoat, and gold-clocked stockings. High red-heeled shoes, diamond-buckled, were on his feet, lace foamed over his hands and at his neck, while a white wig, marvellously curled and powdered, replaced his shorn locks. Unconsciously he drew himself up, tilting his chin a little, and shook out his handkerchief.
But Philip didn’t say a word. He kept staring at his reflection, unable to believe it was him. He saw a tall, slender figure in a light blue satin coat, white trousers, a floral waistcoat, and gold-stitched stockings. On his feet were high red-heeled shoes with diamond buckles, and lace adorned his hands and neck. A beautifully curled and powdered white wig replaced his shaved hair. Without realizing it, he straightened up, tilted his chin slightly, and shook out his handkerchief.
"Well!" The Marquis grew impatient. "You have nothing to say?"
"Well!" the Marquis said, becoming impatient. "Don't you have anything to say?"
Philip turned.
Philip turned around.
"C'est merveilleux!" he breathed.
"It's wonderful!" he breathed.
The Marquis beamed, but he shook his head.
The Marquis smiled, but he shook his head.
"In time, yes. At present, a thousand times no! C'est gauche, c'est impossible!"
"In the future, yes. Right now, absolutely not! That's awkward, it's impossible!"
Unwontedly humble, Philip begged to be made less gauche.
Unusually humble, Philip pleaded to be made less awkward.
"It is my intention," said the Marquis. "A month or so and I shall be proud of my pupil."
"It’s my goal," said the Marquis. "In about a month, I’ll be proud of my student."
"Faith, I'm proud of ye now!" cried Tom. "Why, lad, you'll be more modish than ever Maurice was!"
"Faith, I'm proud of you now!" shouted Tom. "Wow, buddy, you'll be more stylish than Maurice ever was!"
Philip flushed beneath his powder. A ruby on his finger caught his eye. He regarded it for a moment, frowning, then he took it off.
Philip blushed under his makeup. A ruby on his finger caught his attention. He stared at it for a moment, frowning, then he took it off.
"Oh?" queried the Marquis. "Why?"
"Oh?" asked the Marquis. "Why?"
"I don't like it."
"I don't like it."
"You don't like it? Why not?"
"You don't like it? What's the reason?"
"I don't know. I'll only wear sapphires and diamonds."
"I don't know. I'll only wear sapphires and diamonds."
"By heaven, the boy's right!" exclaimed Tom. "He should be all blue!"
"Honestly, the kid's right!" shouted Tom. "He should be all blue!"
"In a month—two months—I shall present you at Versailles," decided the Marquis. "François, remove that abominable ruby. And now—en avant!"
"In a month—two months—I will introduce you at Versailles," the Marquis decided. "François, take off that awful ruby. And now—let's go!"
And so went Philip to his first ball.
And so Philip went to his first dance.
At the end of the month Tom went home to London, having set his nephew's feet on the path he was to tread. He left him in charge of M. de Château-Banvau, who had by now developed a lively interest in him.
At the end of the month, Tom went home to London, having set his nephew on the path he was meant to follow. He left him under the care of M. de Château-Banvau, who had by now developed a keen interest in him.
After that first ball Philip threw off the last shreds of rebellion; he played his part well, and he became very busy. Every morning he fenced with an expert until he had acquired some skill with a small-sword; he spoke nothing but French from morn to night; he permitted the Marquis to introduce him into society; he strove to loosen his tongue, and he paid flippant court to several damsels who ogled him for his fine appearance, until his light conversation grew less forced and uncomfortable. For a while he took no interest in his tailoring, allowing Tom or François to garb him as they pleased. But one day, when François extended a pair of cream stockings to his gaze, he eyed them through his quizzing-glass for a long moment. Then he waved them aside.
After that first ball, Philip let go of the last bits of rebellion; he played his role well and kept himself very busy. Every morning, he practiced fencing with an expert until he got some skill with a small sword; he spoke only French from morning to night; he allowed the Marquis to introduce him to society; he worked on getting better at conversation, and he casually flirted with several young ladies who admired him for his good looks, until his light chatting became less forced and awkward. For a while, he didn’t pay much attention to his clothes, letting Tom or François dress him as they liked. But one day, when François held out a pair of cream stockings for him to see, he examined them through his quizzing glass for a long moment. Then he waved them away.
François was hurt; he liked those stockings. Would not M'sieur consider them? M'sieur most emphatically would not. If François admired pink clocks on a cream ground, let him take the stockings. M'sieur would not wear them; they offended him.
François was upset; he liked those stockings. Wouldn't M'sieur consider them? M'sieur definitely would not. If François admired pink clocks on a cream background, he could have the stockings. M'sieur wouldn't wear them; they disgusted him.
Before very long "le jeune Anglais" was looked for and welcomed. Ladies liked him for his firm chin, and his palpable manliness; men liked him for his modesty and his money. He was invited to routs and bals masqués, and to card-parties and soirées. Philip began to enjoy himself; he was tasting the delights of popularity. Bit by bit he grew to expect invitations from these new acquaintances. But still M. le Marquis was dissatisfied. It was all very well, but not well enough for him.
Before long, "the young Englishman" was sought after and welcomed. Women liked him for his strong chin and obvious masculinity; men appreciated his modesty and wealth. He received invitations to parties and masked balls, as well as card games and evening gatherings. Philip started to enjoy himself; he was experiencing the pleasures of popularity. Gradually, he came to expect invitations from these new friends. But still, Mr. Marquis was not satisfied. It was good, but not good enough for him.
However, it was quite well enough for Thomas, and he departed, chuckling and elated. He left Philip debating over two wigs and the arrangement of his jewels.
However, it was more than good enough for Thomas, and he left, laughing and excited. He left Philip trying to choose between two wigs and figuring out how to arrange his jewelry.
Hardly a fortnight later Philip made secure his position in Polite Society by fighting a duel with a jealous husband. Lest you should be shocked at this sudden depravity, I will tell you that there was little enough cause for fighting, as Philip considered the lady as he might consider an aunt. Happily she was unaware of this. Philip's friends did not hold back; he had no difficulty in finding seconds, and the affaire ended in a neat thrust which pinked the husband, and a fresh wave of popularity for Philip.
Hardly two weeks later, Philip solidified his place in polite society by getting into a duel with a jealous husband. Before you get shocked by this sudden moral decline, let me tell you that there wasn't much reason for the fight, as Philip viewed the woman like an aunt. Fortunately, she didn't know this. Philip's friends were all-in; he had no trouble finding seconds, and the whole situation wrapped up with a clean thrust that nicked the husband, leading to a new wave of popularity for Philip.
The Marquis told his pupil that he was a gay dog, and was met by a chilling stare.
The Marquis told his student that he was a fun-loving guy, and received a cold glare in response.
"I—beg—your pardon?" said Philip stiffly.
"I—beg—your pardon?" Philip said stiffly.
"But what a modesty!" cried the Marquis, much amused.
"But what modesty!" exclaimed the Marquis, clearly entertained.
"Is it conceivable that you think me attracted by the smiles of Madame de Foli-Martin?"
"Do you really think I'm drawn to the smiles of Madame de Foli-Martin?"
"But yes! Of course I think it!"
"But yes! Of course I think so!"
"Permit me to enlighten you," said Philip. "My affections are with a lady—at home."
"Let me clarify," said Philip. "I'm in love with a woman—back home."
"Oh, la, la!" deplored the Marquis. "A lady of the country? A simple country wench?"
"Oh, wow!" lamented the Marquis. "A woman from the countryside? Just a simple country girl?"
"I thank God, yes," said Philip. He depressed his friend, who had hoped for better things of him. But he thought it wiser to change the subject.
"I thank God, yeah," said Philip. He brought down his friend, who had hoped for better things from him. But he figured it was smarter to change the subject.
"Philip, I will take you to Court."
"Philip, I'm going to take you to court."
Philip crossed one elegantly breeched leg over the other. He was, if anything, a little bored.
Philip crossed one elegantly dressed leg over the other. He was, if anything, a bit bored.
"Yes? Next week, perhaps? I am very much engaged until then."
"Yeah? Maybe next week? I'm pretty busy until then."
The shrewd eyes twinkled.
The clever eyes sparkled.
"The manner is excellent, my friend. You will like to make your bow to the King."
"The style is great, my friend. You'll want to greet the King."
Philip shrugged.
Philip rolled his eyes.
"Certainly. I trust the King will consider himself sufficiently honoured."
"Sure thing. I'm sure the King will feel honored enough."
"Sans doute," bowed the Marquis. "But I counsel you, slayer of hearts, to cast your eyes away from la Pompadour."
"Without a doubt," said the Marquis with a bow. "But I advise you, heartbreaker, to take your gaze away from la Pompadour."
"M'sieur, I have already told you—"
"Sir, I already told you—"
"Oh, yes. But you have now the name for—slaying of hearts."
"Oh, yes. But now you have the name for—breaking hearts."
Philip dropped his affectation.
Philip dropped his pretentiousness.
"Good gad! Do you say so, sir? I?"
"Good gosh! Are you really saying that, sir? Me?"
"It is very fashionable," said the Marquis mischievously. "You become a figure."
"It’s really trendy," the Marquis said playfully. "You become a standout."
"But I—" He checked himself, and relapsed into languor. "They fatigue me." And he yawned.
"But I—" He caught himself and fell back into exhaustion. "They tire me." And he yawned.
"What! Even la Salévier?"
"What! Even la Salévier?"
"The woman with the enormous wig—oh—ah! She is well enough, but passée, mon cher Marquis, passée!"
"The woman with the huge wig—oh—wow! She's fine, but outdated, my dear Marquis, outdated!"
"Sangdieu, you are fastidious of a sudden! Is the little country chit so lovely?"
"Sangdieu, you're being so picky all of a sudden! Is the little country girl that beautiful?"
"Your pardon, Marquis, but I prefer to leave that lady's name out of this or any discussion."
"Excuse me, Marquis, but I’d rather not mention that lady's name in this or any conversation."
"Or I shall have a small-sword through my heart, hein?"
"Or will I have a small sword through my heart, really?"
Philip smiled.
Philip grinned.
"That is absurd, sir."
"That's ridiculous, sir."
That night he gave a card-party. The play was high and the bottles numerous. He lost some money, won a little, and was put to bed by his valet long after dawn. He awoke later with a splitting headache, but he considered himself a man. That was in September.
That night he hosted a card party. The stakes were high and the drinks were flowing. He lost some money, won a bit back, and his valet tucked him into bed long after sunrise. He woke up later with a pounding headache, but he felt like a man. That was in September.
SevenSeven
Mr. Bancroft Comes to Paris and Is AnnoyedMr. Bancroft Arrives in Paris and Gets Frustrated
In February came Mr. Bancroft to Paris. Philip's departure from Little Fittledean had been closely followed by his own, for he found that Cleone no longer smiled. Also, the spice of wooing her was gone when there was no jealous lover to flout. He waited until his affaire had blown over, and then he went back to London. Now, very blasé, he came to Paris in search of new pastimes.
In February, Mr. Bancroft arrived in Paris. Philip had left Little Fittledean right before him, because he noticed that Cleone wasn't smiling anymore. Plus, the thrill of pursuing her faded without a jealous boyfriend around to tease. He waited until his situation calmed down, and then returned to London. Now, feeling pretty jaded, he came to Paris looking for new adventures.
It was not long before he met Philip. And the manner of the meeting was delightfully sensational. Under the auspices of his friend, M. de Chambert, he attended a rout at the hotel of the Duchesse de Maugry. He was presented to one Mademoiselle de Chaucheron, a sprightly little lady, with roguish black eyes. Mr. Bancroft was content to form one of the small court she held. Several old acquaintances he met, for he was not unknown in Paris.
It wasn't long before he met Philip. The way they met was wonderfully exciting. With the help of his friend, M. de Chambert, he attended a party at the hotel of the Duchesse de Maugry. He was introduced to a Mademoiselle de Chaucheron, a lively young woman with mischievous black eyes. Mr. Bancroft was happy to be part of the small circle she entertained. He ran into several old friends, as he was not unfamiliar in Paris.
Conversation flourished for some time. But suddenly Mademoiselle cried out, clapping her hands:
Conversation thrived for a while. But suddenly, Mademoiselle shouted, clapping her hands:
"Le voilà, notre petit Philippe! Eh bien, petit Anglais?"
"Here he is, our little Philippe! Well then, little Englishman?"
A slight gentleman in peach-coloured satin, powdered, painted, perfumed, came quickly through the group and went down on one knee before her.
A slight man in peach-colored satin, with powdered skin, makeup, and perfume, hurried through the crowd and knelt down before her.
"At thy most exquisite feet, my lady!"
"At your most exquisite feet, my lady!"
Delighted, she gave him her hand to kiss.
Delighted, she extended her hand for him to kiss.
"And where have you been this long while, vaurien?"
"And where have you been all this time, good-for-nothing?"
Philip kissed the tips of her fingers, one by one.
Philip kissed her fingertips, one by one.
"Languishing in outer darkness, chérie."
"Languishing in outer darkness, babe."
"The darkness of the Court!" laughed the Comte de Saint-Dantin. "Philippe, I know you for a rogue and a trifler!"
"The darkness of the Court!" laughed the Comte de Saint-Dantin. "Philippe, I know you're a rogue and a fool!"
Philip looked up, still holding Mademoiselle's hand.
Philip looked up, still holding Mademoiselle's hand.
"Someone has maligned me. Of what am I accused?"
"Someone has slandered me. What am I being accused of?"
Mademoiselle rapped his knuckles with her fan.
Mademoiselle tapped his knuckles with her fan.
"Voyons! Have you finished with my hand?"
"Let's see! Have you wrapped up with my hand?"
Instantly he turned back to her.
Instantly, he turned back to her.
"I have lost count! Now I must begin again. One moment, Comte, I am much occupied!" Gravely he kissed each rosy finger a second time. "And one for the lovely whole. Voilà!"
"I've lost track! Now I have to start over. Just a moment, Comte, I'm very busy!" Seriously, he kissed each rosy finger a second time. "And one for the lovely whole. Voilà!"
"You are indeed a rogue," she told him. "For you care—not one jot!"
"You really are a scoundrel," she said to him. "Because you don’t care—at all!"
"If that were true I were a rogue beyond reprieve," he answered gaily.
"If that were true, I'd be a rogue with no chance of redemption," he replied cheerfully.
"You don't deceive me, le petit Philippe!... So sweet, so amiable, so great a flatterer—with no heart to lose!"
"You can't fool me, little Philippe!... So charming, so nice, such a smooth talker—with no heart to lose!"
"Rumour hath it that 'tis already lost," smiled De Bergeret. "Eh, Philippe?"
"Rumor has it that it's already lost," smiled De Bergeret. "Right, Philippe?"
"Lost an hundred times," mourned Philip, "and retrieved never!"
"Lost a hundred times," Philip lamented, "and never retrieved!"
"Oh!" Mademoiselle started back in mock-anger. "Wretch that thou art, and so fickle! Rise! I'll no more of you!"
"Oh!" Mademoiselle stepped back in feigned anger. "How could you be so cruel and so changeable! Get up! I won't deal with you anymore!"
"Alack!" Philip came to his feet, and dusted his knee with his handkerchief. "I give you thanks, mignonne, 'twas very hard."
"Alas!" Philip stood up and wiped his knee with his handkerchief. "Thank you, mignonne, that was quite difficult."
"But you do not say! How is she, la Pompadour?" cried De Salmy.
"But you won't believe it! How is she, la Pompadour?" shouted De Salmy.
Philip pressed a hand to his forehead.
Philip pressed his hand to his forehead.
"La Pompadour? I do not know; I have forgotten. She has blue eyes, not black."
"La Pompadour? I don’t know; I’ve forgotten. She has blue eyes, not black."
Mademoiselle promptly hid behind her fan.
Mademoiselle quickly hid behind her fan.
Mr. Bancroft was staring at Philip as one in a trance. At that moment Philip looked his way. The grey eyes held no recognition and passed on.
Mr. Bancroft was staring at Philip as if he were in a trance. At that moment, Philip glanced his way. The gray eyes showed no recognition and moved on.
"Good heavens!" exclaimed Bancroft. '"Tis never Mr. Jettan?"
"Good heavens!" Bancroft exclaimed. "Is that really Mr. Jettan?"
"Que lui dit-il?" asked Mademoiselle, for Bancroft had spoken in English.
"What did he say to her?" asked Mademoiselle, since Bancroft had spoken in English.
Philip bowed distantly.
Philip bowed from afar.
"M'sieur?"
"Sir?"
"You've not forgotten me? Bancroft?"
"You haven't forgotten me? Bancroft?"
"Ah—Mr. Bancroft! I remember. Your servant, sir." He bowed again.
"Ah—Mr. Bancroft! I remember you. Your servant, sir." He bent slightly again.
"Gad, I could scarce credit mine eyes! Nom de Dieu!"
"Gosh, I could hardly believe my eyes! God's name!"
"Aha, that I understand!" said Mademoiselle relievedly. "It is one of your friends, Philippe?" She smiled upon Mr. Bancroft with more warmth, and extended her hand. "L'ami de Philippe—ah, but you should have said!"
"Aha, I get it!" said Mademoiselle, feeling relieved. "It's one of your friends, Philippe?" She smiled at Mr. Bancroft with more warmth and reached out her hand. "L'ami de Philippe—ah, but you should have mentioned that!"
Mr. Bancroft was not elated at being classed as Philip's friend, but he bowed over Mademoiselle's hand with a good grace.
Mr. Bancroft wasn't thrilled about being labeled as Philip's friend, but he kindly bent over Mademoiselle's hand.
"I had no notion of finding him here, mademoiselle. The last time we met was—in a wood."
"I had no idea I would find him here, miss. The last time we met was—in a woods."
"Tell!" besought the lady.
"Please tell me!" begged the lady.
Philip threw out his hands.
Philip waved his hands.
"Ah, no, chérie! That meeting was so disastrous to my vanity!"
"Ah, no, darling! That meeting was such a blow to my ego!"
"Raison de plus," decided Mademoiselle. "Tell me about it!"
"Reason for that," Mademoiselle decided. "Tell me about it!"
"Mr. Bancroft and I had some slight difference in opinion which we settled in a wood. I was very easily worsted."
"Mr. Bancroft and I had a small disagreement that we resolved in a forest. I was quickly outmatched."
"You?" cried Mademoiselle. "Impossible!"
"You?" exclaimed Mademoiselle. "No way!"
"On the contrary, bien aimée; I was, in those days, a very sorry spectacle, was I not, sir?"
"On the contrary, bien aimée; back then, I was quite a sad sight, wasn't I, sir?"
"Not so long since," said Mr. Bancroft.
"Not too long ago," said Mr. Bancroft.
"Six months," nodded Philip, and turned to speak to the Comte de Saint-Dantin.
"Six months," Philip nodded and turned to talk to the Comte de Saint-Dantin.
Mademoiselle was still incredulous.
She was still incredulous.
"A sorry spectacle? Philippe?"
"A sad sight? Philippe?"
"I scent an intrigue," said a little Vicomte. "Clothilde, make him tell!"
"I smell something interesting," said the little Vicomte. "Clothilde, get him to spill the beans!"
"Of course," she said. "Philippe!"
"Sure," she said. "Philippe!"
Philip swung neatly round to face her.
Philip turned smoothly to face her.
"Chère Clothilde?"
"Dear Clothilde?"
"Come here! I want you to tell me what you mean by a sorry spectacle. If you refuse—bien! I shall ask Mr. Bancroft!"
"Come here! I want you to explain what you mean by a sorry spectacle. If you refuse—fine! I’ll ask Mr. Bancroft!"
"Oh, I'll give away no man's secrets!" simpered Bancroft.
"Oh, I won’t reveal anyone's secrets!" Bancroft said with a smirk.
Philip raised his eyeglass. He observed Mr. Bancroft dispassionately. Then he shrugged, and turned back to Clothilde.
Philip lifted his eyeglass. He looked at Mr. Bancroft without any emotion. Then he shrugged and turned back to Clothilde.
"Petite ange, it's a sad tale. Six months ago I lived in the country, and I was a very churlish bumpkin. Then I was made to see the folly of my ways, and now—me voici!"
"Petite ange, it’s a sad story. Six months ago, I lived in the countryside, and I was a really rude hayseed. Then I was made to realize how foolish I was, and now—here I am!"
"I said that I scented an intrigue," said the Vicomte tranquilly.
"I mentioned that I sensed something intriguing," the Vicomte said calmly.
"But wait, wait! You in the country, Philippe? You jest!"
"But hold on, hold on! You in the country, Philippe? You're kidding!"
"On my honour, no, chérie! I came to Paris to learn the ways of Polite Society."
"Honestly, no, darling! I came to Paris to learn the ways of polite society."
"Six months ago?" De Bergeret was astonished. "It is your first visit? You learned all this in so short a time?"
"Six months ago?" De Bergeret was shocked. "It's your first visit? You picked all this up in such a short time?"
"I have a natural aptitude," smiled Philip. "Now are you satisfied?"
"I have a natural talent," Philip smiled. "Are you satisfied now?"
"Je n'en reviendrai jamais!" Mademoiselle spoke emphatically. "Jamais, jamais, jamais!"
"I will never get over this!" Mademoiselle said emphatically. "Never, ever, ever!"
"I am not at all satisfied."
"I'm really not satisfied."
Philip cocked one eyebrow at the dainty Vicomte.
Philip raised an eyebrow at the delicate Vicomte.
"What more would you have?"
"What else do you want?"
"I would know of what like she is."
"I would like to know what she's like."
"She?"
"Her?"
"The lady to whom your heart is lost."
"The woman who has captured your heart."
"That's an hundred she's," replied Philip airily. "And they are all different!"
"That's a hundred she's," Philip replied casually. "And they’re all different!"
"I dare swear I could enlighten M. de Ravel," drawled Bancroft.
"I bet I could enlighten M. de Ravel," Bancroft drawled.
All eyes turned his way. Philip seated himself beside Mademoiselle. He was smiling faintly.
All eyes were on him. Philip sat down next to Mademoiselle. He had a slight smile on his face.
"Proceed, mon ami. Who is this lady that I have forgotten?"
"Go ahead, my friend. Who is this woman that I can't remember?"
"Forgotten? Oh, come now, Jettan!"
"Forgotten? Oh, come on, Jettan!"
Philip played with Clothilde's fan; he was still smiling, but the bright grey eyes that met Bancroft's held a challenge.
Philip played with Clothilde's fan; he was still smiling, but the bright gray eyes that met Bancroft's held a challenge.
"If it transpired, m'sieur, that I had not forgotten it is possible that I might resent any liberties you or others thought to take with that lady's name," he said softly.
"If it turns out, sir, that I haven’t forgotten, I might take issue with any liberties you or others choose to take with that lady's name," he said softly.
There was a sudden silence. No one could mistake the menacing note in Philip's smooth voice. Saint-Dantin made haste to fill the breach.
There was an abrupt silence. No one could misunderstand the threatening tone in Philip's calm voice. Saint-Dantin quickly rushed to fill the gap.
"The little Philippe is ready to fight us all, but it cannot be permitted. We'll not plague him, for he is very devilish when he is roused, I assure you!" He laughed easily and offered Bancroft snuff.
"The little Philippe is ready to fight us all, but that can't be allowed. We won’t bother him, because he’s really scary when he gets angry, I promise you!" He laughed casually and offered Bancroft some snuff.
"He is very fastidious," sneered Bancroft.
"He is very particular," sneered Bancroft.
M. le Comte closed his snuff-box and stepped back. He became politely bored.
M. le Comte closed his snuff box and stepped back. He became politely uninterested.
"The subject grows somewhat tedious, I think. Mademoiselle, will you dance?"
"The topic is getting a bit boring, I think. Mademoiselle, would you like to dance?"
Bancroft flushed. Mademoiselle sprang up.
Bancroft blushed. Mademoiselle jumped up.
"I am promised to Jules!" She nodded, smiling, to De Bergeret. Together they walked away from the little group.
"I’m engaged to Jules!" She nodded, smiling at De Bergeret. Together they walked away from the small group.
Saint-Dantin linked arms with Philip.
Saint-Dantin linked arms with Philip.
"Come with me to the card-room, Philippe. Unless you wish to lead out la Salévier?" He nodded to where an opulent beauty stood.
"Come with me to the card room, Philippe. Unless you want to go talk to la Salévier?" He nodded toward where a glamorous woman was standing.
"It's too fatiguing," said Philip. "I'll come."
"It's too tiring," Philip said. "I'll go."
"Who is he, the ill-disposed gentleman in pink?" inquired the Comte, when they were out of earshot.
"Who is that guy in pink who seems unfriendly?" asked the Comte, once they were out of earshot.
"A creature of no importance," shrugged Philip.
"A creature that doesn't matter," Philip shrugged.
"So I see. Yet he contrives to arouse your anger?"
"So I get it. But he manages to get you angry?"
"Yes," admitted Philip. "I do not like the colour of his coat."
"Yeah," Philip admitted. "I don't like the color of his coat."
"You may call upon me," said Saint-Dantin at once. "I do not like anything about him. He was here before—last year. His conversation lacks finesse. He is tolerated in London, hein?"
"You can call on me," said Saint-Dantin immediately. "I don’t like anything about him. He was here before—last year. His conversation lacks finesse. He's tolerated in London, hein?"
"I don't know. I trust not."
"I don't know. I hope not."
"Hé, hé! So he interfered between you and the lady?"
"Hey, hey! So he got involved between you and the woman?"
Philip withdrew his arm.
Philip pulled back his arm.
"Saint-Dantin!"
"Saint Dantin!"
"Oh, yes, yes, I know! We all know that in the background lurks—a lady! Else why your so chaste and cold demeanour?"
"Oh, yes, yes, I get it! We all know that lurking in the background is a lady! Otherwise, why are you so pure and distant?"
"Am I cold?"
"Am I chilly?"
"At the bottom, yes. Is it not so?"
"At the bottom, yeah. Isn’t that right?"
"Certainly it is so. It's unfashionable to possess a heart."
"Definitely, that's true. It's not cool to have feelings."
"Oh, Philippe, thou art a rogue."
"Oh, Philippe, you're a rebel."
"So I have been told. Presumably because I am innocent of the slightest indiscretion. Curious. No one dubs you rogue who so fully merit the title. But I, whose reputation is spotless, am necessarily a wicked one and a deceiver. I shall write a sonnet on the subject."
"So I’ve been told. Probably because I haven’t done anything wrong at all. It’s interesting. No one calls you a rogue when you truly deserve the title. But me, with a flawless reputation, is somehow seen as the wicked one and a liar. I’m going to write a sonnet about this."
"Ah, no!" begged Saint-Dantin in alarm. "Your sonnets are vile, Philippe! So let us have no more verse from you, I pray! All else you can do, but, sacré nom de Dieu, your verse—!"
"Ah, no!" begged Saint-Dantin in alarm. "Your sonnets are awful, Philippe! So let’s not have any more poetry from you, please! You can do everything else, but, sacré nom de Dieu, your poetry—!"
"Alas!" sighed Philip, "'tis my only ambition. I shall persevere."
"Alas!" sighed Philip, "it's my only ambition. I will keep going."
Saint-Dantin paused, a hand on the curtain that shut off the card-room.
Saint-Dantin paused, his hand on the curtain that separated the card room.
"Your only ambition, Philippe?"
"Is that your only ambition, Philippe?"
"For the moment," answered Philip sweetly. "All things pall on one after a time."
"For now," Philip replied sweetly. "Everything gets boring after a while."
"Save the greatest ambition?" Saint-Dantin's eyes were purely mischievous.
"Save the biggest ambition?" Saint-Dantin's eyes were full of mischief.
"You are as inquisitive as a monkey," said Philip, and propelled him into the card-room.
"You’re as curious as a monkey," Philip said, and pushed him into the card room.
"For how long has that fellow lorded it here?" asked Bancroft of his friend.
"For how long has that guy been in charge here?" asked Bancroft of his friend.
M. de Chambert flicked one great cuff with his handkerchief.
M. de Chambert flicked one large cuff with his handkerchief.
"Oh, some months! He is refreshing, is it not so? So young, so lovable."
"Oh, some months! He's refreshing, isn't he? So young, so lovable."
"Lovable be damned!" said Bancroft.
"Loveable, be damned!" said Bancroft.
De Chambert looked at him in surprise.
De Chambert looked at him in shock.
"You don't like our little Philippe?"
"You don't like our little Philippe?"
"No, I do not. Conceited young upstart!"
"No, I don't. Conceited young go-getter!"
"Con—ah, but no! You misunderstand him! He pretends, and it is very amusing, but he is not conceited; he is just a bébé."
"Con—ah, but no! You’re misunderstanding him! He’s just putting on an act, and it’s really funny, but he’s not stuck up; he’s just a bébé."
"Damn it, is he everyone's pet?"
"Damn it, is he everyone's favorite?"
"C'est le dernier cri de Paris. There are some who are jealous, naturally, but all who know him like him too much to be jealous."
"It's the latest trend in Paris. Some people are jealous, of course, but everyone who knows him likes him too much to feel jealousy."
"Jealous!" Bancroft snorted. "Jealous of that sprig!"
"Jealous!" Bancroft scoffed. "Jealous of that kid!"
De Chambert cast him a shrewd glance.
De Chambert gave him a sharp look.
"A word in your ear, m'sieu'! Do not speak your dislike too widely. Le petit Philippe has powerful friends. You will be frowned upon if you sneer at him."
"A word in your ear, sir! Don’t spread your dislike too widely. Little Philippe has powerful friends. You’ll be looked down upon if you mock him."
Bancroft struggled for words.
Bancroft had a hard time finding words.
"I'll—not conceal from you, De Chambert, that I've a grudge against your little Philippe. I punished him once before for impudence."
"I won't hide it from you, De Chambert, that I have a grudge against your little Philippe. I punished him once before for being cheeky."
"Aha? I don't think you were well advised to do so again. He would have no lack of friends, and with a small-sword he is a veritable devil. It would not be wise to show your enmity, for you will meet him everywhere, and he is the ladies' darling. That says much, hein?"
"Aha? I don’t think it was a good idea for you to do that again. He’ll have plenty of friends, and with a small sword, he’s a real menace. It wouldn’t be smart to show that you’re against him, because you’ll run into him everywhere, and he’s quite the favorite among the ladies. That says a lot, right?"
"And when I saw him last," spluttered Bancroft, "he was clad in a coat I'd not give a lackey, and had as much conversation as a scarecrow!"
"And when I saw him last," Bancroft exclaimed, "he was wearing a coat I wouldn't give to a servant, and he had as much to say as a scarecrow!"
"Yes? I heard some talk of that. He is a marvel, our Philippe."
"Yes? I heard some chatter about that. He’s amazing, our Philippe."
"Curse all marvels!" said Bancroft fervently.
"Curse all wonders!" Bancroft exclaimed passionately.
EightEight
In Which Philip Delivers Himself of a RondeauIn Which Philip Shares a Rondeau
M. Le Comte De Saint-Dantin gave a select dinner and card-party some few weeks after the coming of Mr. Bancroft. Only his chosen intimates were invited, and amongst them was Philip. At half-past five all the guests, save one, were assembled in the library, and Saint-Dantin was comparing his chronometer with the clock on the mantelpiece.
M. Le Comte De Saint-Dantin hosted an exclusive dinner and card party a few weeks after Mr. Bancroft arrived. Only his closest friends were invited, including Philip. By 5:30, all the guests except one were gathered in the library, and Saint-Dantin was checking his chronometer against the clock on the mantelpiece.
"Now what comes to Philippe?" he inquired of no one in particular. "Where is the child?"
"What's going on with Philippe?" he asked, not really directing the question at anyone. "Where's the kid?"
"He was at the ball last night," said M. de Chatelin, smoothing his ruffles. "He left early and in great haste." He raised his eyes and they were twinkling. "The pearl that hung from Mademoiselle de Marcherand's right ear inspired him and he fled."
"He was at the party last night," said M. de Chatelin, adjusting his ruffles. "He left early and in quite a hurry." He looked up, his eyes sparkling. "The pearl dangling from Mademoiselle de Marcherand's right ear caught his attention and he took off."
"Fled? Why?"
"Run away? Why?"
"I believe, to compose a ballade in its honour."
"I think I should write a ballade in its honor."
Saint-Dantin flung up his hands.
Saint-Dantin threw up his hands.
"May the devil fly away with Philippe and his verse! I dare swear it's that that keeps him now."
"May the devil take Philippe and his poetry! I swear that's what's holding him back now."
Paul de Vangrisse turned his head.
Paul de Vangrisse turned his head.
"Do you speak of Philippe? I thought I heard his name?"
"Are you talking about Philippe? I thought I heard his name."
"But yes! Henri declares he is possessed of an inspiration for a ballade to Julie de Marcherand's pearl."
"But yes! Henri says he has been inspired to write a ballad for Julie de Marcherand's pearl."
De Vangrisse came towards them, stiff silks rustling.
De Vangrisse walked toward them, the stiff silks rustling.
"Alas, it is too true. I visited him this morning and found him en déshabillé, clasping his brow. He seized on me and demanded a rhyme to some word which I have forgot. So I left him."
"Unfortunately, it’s true. I went to see him this morning and found him in his underwear, gripping his forehead. He grabbed me and asked for a rhyme to some word that I’ve forgotten. So I left him."
"Can no one convince Philippe that he is not a poet?" asked De Bergeret plaintively.
"Can’t anyone convince Philippe that he isn’t a poet?" asked De Bergeret sadly.
De Vangrisse shook his head.
De Vangrisse shook his head.
"One may tell him that he is no swordsman, and no true cavalier; one may decry all his graces and he will laugh with one; but one may not say that he will never be a poet. He will not believe it."
"One might tell him that he's not a swordsman and no real knight; one might criticize all his talents and he will laugh along; but one must not say that he will never be a poet. He won't accept that."
"Oh, he believes it, au fond," answered Saint-Dantin. "It amuses him to pretend. Ah, here he is!"
"Oh, he really believes it, deep down," replied Saint-Dantin. "He thinks it's funny to pretend. Ah, here he comes!"
Into the room came Philip, a vision in shades of yellow. He carried a rolled sheet of parchment, tied with an amber ribbon. He walked with a spring, and his eyes sparkled with pure merriment. He waved the parchment roll triumphantly.
Into the room came Philip, looking radiant in shades of yellow. He carried a rolled-up sheet of parchment, tied with an amber ribbon. He walked with energy, and his eyes sparkled with joy. He waved the parchment roll triumphantly.
Saint-Dantin went forward to greet him.
Saint-Dantin stepped forward to greet him.
"But of a lateness, Philippe," he cried, holding out his hands.
"But it's late, Philippe," he exclaimed, holding out his hands.
"A thousand pardons, Louis! I was consumed of a rondeau until an hour ago."
"I'm really sorry, Louis! I was caught up in a round until just an hour ago."
"A rondeau?" said De Vangrisse. "This morning it was a ballade!"
"A rondeau?" De Vangrisse said. "This morning it was a ballad!"
"This morning? Bah! That was a year ago. Since then it has been a sonnet!"
"This morning? Ugh! That was a year ago. Since then, it’s been a poem!"
"A Dieu ne plaise!" exclaimed Saint-Dantin devoutly.
"God forbid!" exclaimed Saint-Dantin earnestly.
"Of course," agreed Philip. "The theme demanded a rondeau. At three this afternoon I discovered that it was so. Did you come to see me this morning, Paul?"
"Of course," Philip agreed. "The theme called for a rondeau. I realized that at three this afternoon. Did you come to see me this morning, Paul?"
"You asked me for a rhyme," De Vangrisse reminded him.
"You asked me for a rhyme," De Vangrisse reminded him.
"So I did! A rhyme for tout and fou, and you gave me chou!"
"So I did! A rhyme for tout and fou, and you gave me chou!"
"Whereupon you threw your wig at me, and I fled."
"Then you threw your wig at me, and I ran away."
"Chou!" repeated Philip with awful scorn. "Chou!"
"Chou!" Philip repeated with terrible disdain. "Chou!"
Gently but firmly Saint-Dantin took the parchment from him.
Gently but firmly, Saint-Dantin took the parchment from him.
"You shall read it to us later," he promised. "But now you will dine."
"You'll read it to us later," he promised. "But for now, you will eat."
"It goes well before meat," pleaded Philip.
"It pairs well with meat," Philip urged.
He was answered by ribald protests.
He was met with crude protests.
"I'll not listen to your verse on an empty stomach," declared the Vicomte. "Belike I shall appreciate it when in my cups."
"I won't listen to your poetry on an empty stomach," declared the Vicomte. "Maybe I'll appreciate it better when I've had a drink."
"You have no soul," said Philip sadly.
"You don't have a soul," Philip said sadly.
"But I have a stomach, petit Anglais, and it cries aloud for sustenance."
"But I have a stomach, petit Anglais, and it is loudly asking for food."
"I weep for you," said Philip. "Why do I waste my poetic gems upon you?"
"I cry for you," said Philip. "Why do I waste my creative talents on you?"
Saint-Dantin took him by the elbow and led him to the door.
Saint-Dantin took him by the elbow and guided him to the door.
"Parbleu, Philippe, it's what we wish to know. You shall expound to us at dinner."
"Wow, Philippe, that’s what we want to know. You’ll explain it to us at dinner."
Midway through the meal the Vicomte remembered something. He nodded across the table to Philip, who was engaged in a lively and witty argument with De Bergeret.
Midway through the meal, the Vicomte recalled something. He nodded across the table to Philip, who was in the middle of a lively and witty debate with De Bergeret.
"A propos, Philippe. Your so dear friend has been talking about you!"
"By the way, Philippe. Your dear friend has been talking about you!"
"Which so dear friend?" asked Philip. "Jules, if you maintain in the face of my exposition that Jeanne de Fontenay can rival la Salévier in the matter of—"
"Which friend are you talking about?" asked Philip. "Jules, if you still insist after what I just explained that Jeanne de Fontenay can compete with la Salévier in the matter of—"
"But attend!" insisted the Vicomte. "The Englishman—the Bancroft—peste, what a name for my tongue!"
"But listen!" insisted the Vicomte. "The Englishman—the Bancroft—pest, what a name for my tongue!"
Philip broke off in the middle of his discourse. His eyes gleamed in the candlelight.
Philip paused in the middle of his speech. His eyes sparkled in the candlelight.
"Bancroft? What does he say of me?"
"Bancroft? What does he say about me?"
"A great deal, if all I hear is true."
"A lot, if what I'm hearing is true."
Philip set down his glass.
Philip put down his drink.
"Indeed! Now, what might you have heard, De Ravel?"
"Definitely! So, what have you heard, De Ravel?"
"It would appear that ce cher Bancroft feels no love for you, mon pauvre. If De Graune is to be believed, he resents your presence here. He says he has been deceived in you. It is all very sad."
"It seems that ce cher Bancroft has no affection for you, mon pauvre. If you believe De Graune, he dislikes having you around. He claims he's been misled about you. It's all quite unfortunate."
"Yes," said Philip. He frowned. "Very sad. But what does he say?"
"Yeah," said Philip. He frowned. "That's really sad. But what does he say?"
"He divulges your close-guarded secret," said the Vicomte solemnly.
"He reveals your closely guarded secret," said the Vicomte seriously.
"Oh!" Philip turned in his chair and leaned his elbows on the table. "It is possible that I shall have a word to say to M. Bancroft. Continue, Charles!"
"Oh!" Philip turned in his chair and leaned his elbows on the table. "I might have something to say to M. Bancroft. Go on, Charles!"
"He speaks of a lady in 'Leetle Feeteldean' who has blue, blue eyes, and—"
"He talks about a woman in 'Leetle Feeteldean' who has bright blue eyes, and—"
"Shall we pass over her eyes?" smiled Philip.
"Shall we overlook her eyes?" smiled Philip.
"But certainly! Her hair—"
"But of course! Her hair—"
"And her hair? In fact, shall we pass over all her attractions?"
"And her hair? Honestly, should we just skip over all her charms?"
"He is very much in love," loudly whispered De Bergeret.
"He is really in love," De Bergeret whispered loudly.
Philip flashed a smile at him.
Philip smiled at him.
"Very much, Jules. Proceed, Vicomte."
"Thanks a lot, Jules. Go ahead, Vicomte."
The Vicomte sipped his wine.
The Viscount sipped his wine.
"M. Bancroft, he told of your—ah—infatuation. He described the lady—oh, fully!"
"M. Bancroft mentioned your—uh—crush. He described the woman—oh, in detail!"
The thin lips were growing into a straight, smiling line, tightly compressed. Philip nodded.
The thin lips were forming a straight, smiling line, tightly pressed together. Philip nodded.
"Allons! Allons!"
"Let's go! Let's go!"
"Vicomte, does the gossip of the gaming-halls amuse you?" asked Saint-Dantin sharply.
"Vicomte, do the rumors from the casinos entertain you?" asked Saint-Dantin sharply.
But the Vicomte was a mischief-loving soul. He disregarded the rebuke.
But the Vicomte was a playful troublemaker. He ignored the reprimand.
"A pretty piece, he called her, but no more than a simple country wench. By name—"
"A pretty girl, he called her, but just a simple country girl. By name—"
"Oh, have done!" exclaimed Saint-Dantin impatiently.
"Oh, enough already!" exclaimed Saint-Dantin impatiently.
"But no!" Philip waved him aside. "I am very interested in what M'sieur has to say."
"But no!" Philip pushed him away. "I'm really interested in what M'sieur has to say."
"By name, Cleone. We have it from M. Bancroft that she falls in love with him for his beaux yeux and his so charming manner."
"Her name is Cleone. We heard from M. Bancroft that she falls in love with him for his beautiful eyes and his charming demeanor."
"Ah!" Philip's chin sank into his cupped palms. "Et puis?"
"Ah!" Philip's chin rested in his cupped palms. "And then?"
"It is further recorded that one M. Philippe Jettan importuned her with his clumsy attentions, so that M. Bancroft was compelled to teach this M. Philippe a sharp lesson. And when one asks, 'What of the pretty Cleone?' he shrugs his shoulders and replies, very superbly, that he wearied of her as of all others."
"It’s also noted that one M. Philippe Jettan bothered her with his awkward advances, which forced M. Bancroft to give this M. Philippe a harsh lesson. And when someone asks, 'What about the lovely Cleone?' he just shrugs and answers, very coolly, that he got tired of her like he did with all the others."
Saint-Dantin's crisp voice cut into the sudden silence.
Saint-Dantin's clear voice broke the sudden silence.
"Philippe, fill your glass. Paul here tells me of a pass he conceived in his duel with Mardry last month. A—"
"Philippe, fill your glass. Paul is telling me about a move he came up with during his duel with Mardry last month. A—"
"I will ask Paul to show me that pass," said Philip. He leaned back in his chair and laughed softly. A moment later he had resumed his interrupted discussion with De Bergeret.
"I'll ask Paul to show me that pass," said Philip. He leaned back in his chair and chuckled softly. A moment later, he had picked up his interrupted discussion with De Bergeret again.
Afterwards Saint-Dantin took him aside.
Afterward, Saint-Dantin pulled him aside.
"Philippe, I would not have had that happen at my table! Charles is incorrigible!"
"Philippe, I wouldn't have let that happen at my table! Charles is impossible!"
"On the contrary, I am grateful to him," replied Philip. "I might not have heard else. Now I will shut that fellow's mouth."
"On the contrary, I appreciate him," replied Philip. "I might not have heard otherwise. Now I’ll shut that guy up."
"How?" asked Saint-Dantin blankly.
"How?" asked Saint-Dantin, confused.
Philip made an imaginary pass in the air.
Philip made a pretend pass in the air.
"Short of killing him," objected Saint-Dantin, "I don't see—"
"Unless we kill him," Saint-Dantin replied, "I don't see—"
"Kill him? Not I! I may count on you to—uphold me?"
"Kill him? Not me! Can I rely on you to support me?"
"Of course. But what do you mean to do?"
"Of course. But what do you plan to do?"
"First I will reverse the tables. I will punish him. Then I will assure him that my friends will espouse my cause if he again mentions my lady's name in public."
"First, I'll turn the tables. I'm going to punish him. Then I'll make sure he knows my friends will support my case if he brings up my lady's name in public again."
Saint-Dantin nodded.
Saint-Dantin agreed.
"I'll vouch for those here to-night."
"I'll stand up for those here tonight."
"Wait! Any mention of her name will be reported to me, and I shall send François to administer a little beating. It is well."
"Wait! If anyone mentions her name, it will be reported to me, and I'll send François to give them a little beating. That's fine."
The Comte laughed outright.
The Count laughed out loud.
"Oh, Philippe, thou art a young hot-head! Is this Cleone of so great account?"
"Oh, Philippe, you're such a young hot-head! Is Cleone really that important?"
Philip drew himself up.
Philip straightened himself up.
"She is the lady whom I hope one day to make my wife."
"She is the woman I hope to marry one day."
"Comment? Your wife? Ah, voyons! Cela change l'affaire! I did not know that. Stop his talk, by all means."
"What? Your wife? Oh, wow! That changes everything! I didn't know that. Please, stop his chatter."
"It's what I am going to do," said Philip. "Scélérat!"
"It's what I'm going to do," said Philip. "Scélérat!"
"With a vile taste for pink, hein? You'll call upon me?"
"With a terrible taste for pink, really? You're going to reach out to me?"
"If you please. And, I think, De Bergeret."
"If you don't mind. And, I believe, De Bergeret."
"Saint-Dantin, a wager!" called De Vangrisse. "What are you talking of so earnestly?"
"Saint-Dantin, a bet!" called De Vangrisse. "What are you so seriously talking about?"
"Of pink coats," answered Philip. "Oh, my rondeau! Where is it?"
"Of pink coats," replied Philip. "Oh, my rondeau! Where is it?"
"Devil take your rondeau!" cried the Vicomte. "Come and hazard a throw with me."
"Devil take your rondeau!" shouted the Vicomte. "Come take a chance and roll the dice with me."
"A l'instant!" Philip untied the ribbon about his rondeau and spread out the parchment. "I insist that you shall listen to this product of my brain!" He mounted a chair amid derisive cheers, and bowed right and left in mock solemnity. "To the Pearl that Trembles in her Ear.
"A moment!" Philip untied the ribbon around his round tablet and laid out the parchment. "I insist that you listen to this creation of my mind!" He climbed onto a chair amid mocking cheers and bowed dramatically to the left and right. "To the Pearl that Trembles in her Ear."
Philip paused for his final effect. Arose Saint-Dantin, and like a flash interjected:
Philip paused for his final effect. Saint-Dantin stood up and quickly interjected:
Outraged, Philip threw the parchment at his head.
Outraged, Philip threw the scroll at his head.
NineNine
Mr. Bancroft Is EnragedMr. Bancroft Is Furious
"Philippe, do you go to De Farraud's to-night?" asked De Bergeret suddenly. He was lounging on the couch in Philip's room, watching Philip adjust his patches.
"Philippe, are you going to De Farraud's tonight?" asked De Bergeret suddenly. He was lounging on the couch in Philip's room, watching Philip adjust his patches.
"De Farraud's? I'd not thought of it. Whom shall I meet there?"
"De Farraud's? I hadn't thought about that. Who am I going to meet there?"
"Your very obedient," said De Bergeret, flourishing his hat.
"You're very obedient," said De Bergeret, waving his hat.
"The prospect does not entice me," answered Philip. "No, don't retort! Don't speak. Don't move!" He leaned forward, shifting a candle to throw its light on his face, and frowned at his reflection. The white hand that held the haresfoot wavered an instant, and then alighted at the corner of his mouth. Philip sat back, studying the effect.
"The idea doesn't excite me," Philip replied. "No, don't respond! Don't say anything. Don't move!" He leaned in, adjusting a candle to cast light on his face, and scowled at his reflection. The pale hand holding the haresfoot trembled for a moment before resting at the corner of his mouth. Philip leaned back, observing the result.
"Whom else shall I meet, Jules?"
"Who else should I meet, Jules?"
"The usual people, I fancy. And some others, no doubt."
"The usual crowd, I guess. And probably a few others too."
"De Farraud's friends are so very mixed," deplored Philip. "Do you suppose that De Chambert will be present?"
"De Farraud's friends are such a mixed bag," Philip lamented. "Do you think De Chambert will be there?"
"Nothing is more certain," yawned De Bergeret. "But it will be amusing, and the play will be high, which is all that matters."
"Nothing is more certain," yawned De Bergeret. "But it will be entertaining, and the performance will be top-notch, which is all that really matters."
"But De Chambert wears puce small-clothes," objected Philip.
"But De Chambert wears purple clothing," objected Philip.
"Does he? Mordieu, I'd like to see that! Puce small-clothes, forsooth! And what does our Philippe wear?"
"Does he? Mordieu, I'd love to see that! Burgundy shorts, really! And what does our Philippe wear?"
Philip glanced lovingly down at his pearl-grey breeches.
Philip glanced affectionately down at his light grey pants.
"Grey, and palest pink, with lacings of silver." He slipped out of his gaily-hued robe, and stood up.
"Gray and light pink, with touches of silver." He took off his brightly colored robe and stood up.
De Bergeret levelled his eyeglass at him.
De Bergeret aimed his eyeglass at him.
"Parbleu, Philippe! Grey lace!"
"Wow, Philippe! Grey lace!"
Philip shook out his ruffles.
Philip shook out his cuffs.
"A sweet conceit, hein? But wait! François, my vest!"
"A sweet little idea, right? But hold on! François, my vest!"
His valet brought it, and helped Philip to put it on. It was a very exquisite confection of pink and silver brocade.
His valet brought it in and helped Philip put it on. It was a gorgeous outfit made of pink and silver brocade.
De Bergeret was interested.
De Bergeret was curious.
"I'll swear you designed that, Philippe! Now for the coat!"
"I swear you designed that, Philippe! Now for the coat!"
When Philip had at last succeeded in entering into the coat it was some ten minutes later. François stepped back, panting; Philip arranged his sword to his satisfaction.
When Philip finally managed to get into the coat, it took about ten minutes. François stepped back, out of breath; Philip adjusted his sword to his liking.
"A careless sprinkling of rubies, hein? One in the cravat, one here, another in my wig. And on my fingers, so!..."
"A careless scattering of rubies, right? One in the tie, one here, another in my hair. And on my fingers, just like this!..."
"Perfect!" applauded De Bergeret. "Tonnerre de Dieu, pink hummingbirds on your stockings!"
"Perfect!" cheered De Bergeret. "Tonnerre de Dieu, pink hummingbirds on your stockings!"
François beamed and clasped his hands, gazing in rapt admiration at Philip's startlingly clocked legs.
François smiled widely and brought his hands together, staring in awe at Philip's surprisingly well-groomed legs.
Philip laughed.
Philip chuckled.
"Do they please your artistic soul, Jules? And are they to be wasted on De Farraud? I had intended to go to the Saint-Clamond rout, where I know I shall meet Clothilde. Come with me!"
"Do they inspire your artistic soul, Jules? And should they be wasted on De Farraud? I planned to go to the Saint-Clamond party, where I know I’ll meet Clothilde. Come with me!"
De Bergeret shook his head.
De Bergeret shook his head.
"I promised De Vangrisse I'd be at De Farraud's some time to-night. Forget the lovely Clothilde, Philippe. Bethink you, your so dear friend Bancroft will come to Farraud's in De Chambert's train!"
"I promised De Vangrisse I'd be at De Farraud's sometime tonight. Forget the lovely Clothilde, Philippe. Remember, your dear friend Bancroft will arrive at Farraud's on De Chambert's train!"
Philip was fixing a long ruby ear-ring in his right ear, but he stopped suddenly, and looked over his shoulder at De Bergeret.
Philip was putting a long ruby earring in his right ear, but he suddenly stopped and glanced over his shoulder at De Bergeret.
"Comment?"
"What do you think?"
"Why, you leap to my bait!" said De Bergeret, amused. "I thought you could not resist so great an attraction!"
"Wow, you're falling for my bait!" said De Bergeret, amused. "I figured you couldn't resist such a strong pull!"
Philip fixed the ruby and swept round for his cloak and hat.
Philip adjusted the ruby and turned around to grab his cloak and hat.
"Faith, that can I not. I come, Jules, I come! François, thou rogue, my snuff-box! Would that he may be wearing that salmon-pink! François, my cane! Jules, you are sitting on my cloak! Sangdieu! My new cloak!" He swept De Bergeret off the coat, and shook out the soft, rose-lined folds. "God be praised, it is unhurt!" With a deft movement he swung it over his shoulders and fastened it. "My hat! Jules, what think you of my hat?"
"Faith, I can’t do that. I'm coming, Jules, I'm coming! François, you trickster, bring me my snuff-box! I hope he’s wearing that salmon-pink! François, my cane! Jules, you're sitting on my cloak! Sangdieu! My new cloak!" He pushed De Bergeret off the coat and shook out the soft, rose-lined folds. "Thank God, it’s unharmed!" With a quick motion, he threw it over his shoulders and fastened it. "My hat! Jules, what do you think of my hat?"
"A grey hat! Philippe, what an audacity! You are really coming to De Farraud's?"
"A gray hat! Philippe, how bold of you! Are you really going to De Farraud's?"
"To meet the so dear M. Bancroft. En avant, Jules!"
"To meet the beloved M. Bancroft. Onward, Jules!"
De Bergeret went to the glass.
De Bergeret went to the mirror.
"Cultivate a more restful manner, mon petit! I am not to be hurried. Do you like this mixture of violet and cream?"
"Cultivate a more relaxed vibe, my little one! I shouldn't be rushed. Do you like this combination of violet and cream?"
"I like everything you have on, even the so badly arranged cravat! I am consumed with impatience! Come!"
"I like everything you're wearing, even that poorly tied cravat! I'm so impatient! Let's go!"
"But why? Are you hasting to see the unspeakable Bancroft?"
"But why? Are you rushing to see the unimaginable Bancroft?"
"But yes! Whom else? I will explain en route."
"But yes! Who else? I will explain on the way."
De Bergeret suffered himself to be led to the door.
De Bergeret allowed himself to be led to the door.
"Philippe, it is not convenable to display such enthusiasm. Languor is now the fashion."
"Philippe, it's not appropriate to show so much enthusiasm. Being indifferent is what's in style now."
"I am a fashion unto myself, then. I am an original. And I go to call out M. Bancroft!"
"I’m a style all my own, then. I’m one of a kind. And I’m going to call out M. Bancroft!"
De Bergeret stopped short.
De Bergeret halted abruptly.
"What! A brawl? No, then, I'll not come!"
"What! A fight? No way, I'm not coming!"
"A brawl? Is it possible? I shall conduct the affair with great douceur, I assure you! You and Saint-Dantin are to be my seconds."
"A fight? Is that even possible? I'll handle the situation very gently, I promise you! You and Saint-Dantin will be my seconds."
"Miséricorde! Philippe, you become more and more tiresome!" expostulated his friend. "Why must you fight this fellow?"
"Mercy! Philippe, you’re getting more and more annoying!" his friend exclaimed. "Why do you have to fight this guy?"
"An old quarrel—the settling of an unpaid score! Allons!"
"An old disagreement—time to settle an unpaid debt! Let's go!"
"Oh, the devil," muttered Bancroft.
"Oh, the devil," murmured Bancroft.
"Où donc?" inquired Le Vallon, who was sitting next to him and who understood English.
"Where to?" asked Le Vallon, who was sitting next to him and understood English.
Bancroft shot an angry glance towards the door. Le Vallon turned to see what had excited his wrath.
Bancroft shot an angry look at the door. Le Vallon turned to see what had sparked his fury.
Talking to De Farraud, with many quick gestures and smiles, was Philip. He had just arrived, and he was apologizing for his lateness, throwing all the blame on De Bergeret, who accepted it meekly.
Talking to De Farraud, with many quick gestures and smiles, was Philip. He had just arrived, and he was apologizing for being late, placing all the blame on De Bergeret, who accepted it calmly.
"Oh, the little Englishman!" said Le Vallon scornfully. "Always late, always eccentric. And grey lace! What an affectation!"
"Oh, the little Englishman!" Le Vallon said with contempt. "Always late, always weird. And grey lace! What a pretentious choice!"
Philip cast a swift glance round the room. His eyes rested an instant on Bancroft's face, then they passed on. Two or three men called to him, and he presently went to dice with De Vangrisse. But when Le Vallon left Bancroft to join a faro group, Philip swept up his dice, and with a laughing word to De Vangrisse, promising to return, he walked over to Bancroft's table, and sat down in Le Vallon's chair with a swirl of his full skirts.
Philip quickly glanced around the room. His gaze lingered briefly on Bancroft's face before moving on. A couple of guys called out to him, and he soon joined De Vangrisse for a game of dice. But when Le Vallon left Bancroft to join a faro game, Philip grabbed his dice, tossed a joking comment to De Vangrisse, promising to come back, and walked over to Bancroft's table, sitting down in Le Vallon's seat with a flourish of his skirts.
Bancroft was about to rise. Astonished at Philip's sudden advent, he sank back again.
Bancroft was about to get up. Surprised by Philip's unexpected appearance, he sank back down again.
"To what do I owe this honour?" he demanded.
"Why do I deserve this honor?" he asked.
Philip dealt out the cards.
Philip shuffled the cards.
"I will tell you. A hand of piquet? You will declare?" Bancroft sorted his hand rather sullenly. Not until he had declared and played his card did Philip speak again. Then he took the trick and leaned forward.
"I'll tell you. A hand of piquet? Are you going to declare?" Bancroft arranged his hand rather gloomily. It wasn't until he had declared and played his card that Philip spoke again. Then he took the trick and leaned forward.
"It comes to my ears that you have been bandying a certain lady's name about Paris in a way that does not please me. You understand, yes?"
"It has come to my attention that you've been throwing around a certain woman's name in Paris in a way that I don't appreciate. Do you understand?"
"What the devil is it to you?" cried Bancroft, crimson-faced.
"What the heck is it to you?" shouted Bancroft, his face bright red.
"Sh, sh! Not so loud, if you please! Go on playing! I am informed that you speak of this lady as a pretty piece! It is not how I will have you speak of her. Also, you say that she fell in love with you en désespéré. Eh bien, I say that you lie in your throat!"
"Shh, not so loud, please! Keep playing! I've heard you refer to this lady as a pretty piece! That’s not how I want you to talk about her. Also, you say she fell in love with you out of desperation. Well, I say you’re lying!"
"Sir!"
"Excuse me!"
"Doucement, doucement. Further, I say that if so be you again mention this lady's name in public I shall send my lackeys to punish you. It is understood?"
"Slowly, slowly. Furthermore, I warn you that if you ever mention this lady's name in public again, I will send my servants to deal with you. Is that clear?"
"You—you—you impudent young cockerel! I shall know how to answer this! What's Cleone to you, eh?"
"You—you—you cheeky young rooster! I'll know how to respond to this! What does Cleone mean to you, huh?"
The pleasant smile died. Philip leaned forward.
The nice smile faded. Philip leaned in.
"That name I will not have spoken, m'sieur. Strive to bear it in mind. I have many friends, and they will tell me if you speak of the lady when I am not by. And of the rest I have warned you."
"That's a name I won't let you say, sir. Keep that in mind. I have many friends, and they'll let me know if you mention the lady when I'm not around. And as for the rest, I've already warned you."
"Ye can understand this, Mr. Jettan—I'll speak of her how and when I like!"
"You can understand this, Mr. Jettan—I'll talk about her however and whenever I want!"
Philip shrugged.
Philip shrugged.
"You talk foolishly. There is no question of refusal to comply with my wishes. If I so please I can make Paris ve-ry uncomfortable for you. You know that, I think."
"You’re speaking nonsense. There’s no way I would refuse to follow what you want. If I wanted to, I could make life in Paris extremely uncomfortable for you. You know that, right?"
Bancroft was speechless with rage.
Bancroft was furious.
"There is another matter," continued Philip amiably. "Once before I had occasion to complain of your manner. I do so again. And I find the colour of your ribbons most distasteful to mine eye."
"There’s one more thing," Philip said friendly. "I’ve brought up your attitude before, and I’m doing it again. Plus, I really don’t like the color of your ribbons."
Bancroft sprang up, his chair grating on the polished floor.
Bancroft jumped up, his chair scraping on the polished floor.
"Perhaps you'll have the goodness to name your friends, sir?" he choked.
"Could you please name your friends, sir?" he stammered.
Philip bowed.
Philip bowed.
"This time, yes. It is a little debt I have to pay. M. le Comte de Saint-Dantin and M. de Bergeret will act for me. Or De Vangrisse yonder, or M. le Duc de Vally-Martin."
"This time, yes. I have a small debt to settle. M. le Comte de Saint-Dantin and M. de Bergeret will represent me. Or De Vangrisse over there, or M. le Duc de Vally-Martin."
"The first named will suffice," snapped Bancroft. "My friends will wait on them as soon as may be." With that he flounced away to the other end of the room.
"The first named will do," snapped Bancroft. "My friends will attend to them as soon as possible." With that, he flounced to the other end of the room.
Philip walked back to De Vangrisse and perched on the arm of his chair.
Philip walked back to De Vangrisse and sat on the arm of his chair.
De Bergeret cast his dice and nodded at Philip.
De Bergeret threw his dice and nodded at Philip.
"The deed is done?"
"Is it done?"
"Most satisfactorily," answered Philip. "Throw, Paul, you can beat that."
"That's pretty good," Philip replied. "Come on, Paul, you can do better than that."
"Not I! Jules has the devil's own luck to-night. If it is not an impertinence, are you to meet M. Bancroft?"
"Not me! Jules has the worst luck tonight. If it's not too forward, are you meeting M. Bancroft?"
"Of course. Oh, peste!"—as De Vangrisse cast his dice.
"Of course. Oh, damn!"—as De Vangrisse threw his dice.
"What did I tell you? May I second you?"
"What did I tell you? Can I back you up?"
"A thousand thanks, Paul. But Saint-Dantin and Jules have consented to act for me."
"Thanks a lot, Paul. But Saint-Dantin and Jules have agreed to speak on my behalf."
"Well, I shall come as a spectator," said De Vangrisse. "Jules, another hundred! I'll not be beaten by you!"
"Well, I'll just be a spectator," said De Vangrisse. "Jules, another hundred! I won’t let you beat me!"
Le Vallon, who had watched the brief encounter between his friend and Philip with great curiosity, now edged across to where Bancroft was standing.
Le Vallon, who had watched the short interaction between his friend and Philip with great interest, now moved over to where Bancroft was standing.
Bancroft turned.
Bancroft pivoted.
"Come apart a moment," he said. His voice was still trembling with passion. He and Le Vallon drew near to the window.
"Come here for a second," he said. His voice was still shaking with emotion. He and Le Vallon moved closer to the window.
"You saw that damned fellow come up to me just now?"
"You saw that guy come up to me just now?"
"But yes! I watched very closely. What did he want with you?"
"But yeah! I was paying really close attention. What did he want from you?"
"He came to impose his will—his will!—on mine. Curse his impudence!"
"He came to impose his will—his will!—on me. Damn his arrogance!"
"Why? What did he say?" asked Le Vallon inquisitively.
"Why? What did he say?" Le Vallon asked curiously.
Bancroft did not answer.
Bancroft didn't respond.
"I want you to act for me," he said abruptly. "He—insulted me, and I've sworn to teach him a lesson."
"I want you to do something for me," he said suddenly. "He insulted me, and I've promised to show him a lesson."
Le Vallon drew back a little.
Le Vallon pulled back a bit.
"What? You seek to kill him? Kill le petit Anglais?" His tone was dubious.
"What? You want to kill him? Kill the little Englishman?" His tone was skeptical.
"No, not quite that. I've no wish for trouble. He has too many friends. I'll teach him to leave me alone!"
"No, not exactly that. I don't want any trouble. He has too many friends. I'll show him to keep his distance!"
"Oh, yes! But..." Le Vallon pursed his lips.
"Oh, yes! But..." Le Vallon pressed his lips together.
"But what?" barked Bancroft.
"But what?" snapped Bancroft.
"It is said that he is a not-to-be-despised swordsman. He pinked Armand de Sedlamont with great ease."
"It’s said that he’s a swordsman not to be underestimated. He easily outmatched Armand de Sedlamont."
"Pooh!" said Bancroft. "Six months ago—"
"Pooh!" Bancroft said. "Six months ago—"
"I know, I know, but he has changed."
"I get it, I get it, but he's different now."
Bancroft scowled.
Bancroft frowned.
"Well, will you act for me or not?"
"So, will you work for me or not?"
Le Vallon drew himself up.
Le Vallon straightened up.
"M'sieur, I do not entirely appreciate your manner."
"Mister, I don't really appreciate your attitude."
Bancroft laughed uneasily.
Bancroft chuckled awkwardly.
"Oh, come, Le Vallon! Don't take offence! That puppy has so annoyed me that I can scarce keep my temper. Where's De Chambert?"
"Oh, come on, Le Vallon! Don’t be offended! That puppy has irritated me so much that I can hardly keep my cool. Where’s De Chambert?"
"Playing at lansquenet with De Farraud. And I think we had best mingle with the others. I do not care to appear conspicuous."
"Playing at lansquenet with De Farraud. I think it's better if we blend in with the others. I don’t want to stand out."
Bancroft caught at his arm.
Bancroft grabbed his arm.
"But you will second me?"
"But you'll support me?"
"I shall be honoured," bowed Le Vallon. "And I hope you will succeed in showing my fine gentleman his place."
"I'll be honored," Le Vallon said with a bow. "And I hope you manage to show my good friend his place."
Later in the evening Saint-Dantin sauntered over to where Philip sat, perched on the edge of the table, toasting some of his friends. Saint-Dantin joined the gathering and laid a hand on Philip's shoulder. Philip, who was drinking, choked.
Later in the evening, Saint-Dantin strolled over to where Philip sat, perched on the edge of the table, raising a glass to some of his friends. Saint-Dantin joined the group and put a hand on Philip's shoulder. Philip, who was drinking, choked.
"Malédiction! Oh, 'tis you, Louis! What now?"
"Curse! Oh, it's you, Louis! What now?"
"There is a rumour that you go to fight ce cher Bancroft, Philippe."
"There’s a rumor that you’re going to fight ce cher Bancroft, Philippe."
"Already?" Philip was startled. "Who told you?"
"Already?" Philip was surprised. "Who told you?"
"Personne." Saint-Dantin smiled. "It is whispered here and there. And Bancroft looks so black at you. It's true?"
"Nobody." Saint-Dantin smiled. "It's being said around. And Bancroft has such a dark look at you. Is it true?"
"Of course it's true! Did I not say I should do it? His seconds are to wait upon you and Jules."
"Of course it's true! Didn't I say I would do it? His assistants are here to wait on you and Jules."
"How very fatiguing!" sighed Saint-Dantin. "But quite amusing. One jubilates. Bancroft is not at all liked. He is so entreprenant. An' I mistake not, you will have an audience," he chuckled.
"How exhausting!" sighed Saint-Dantin. "But also pretty funny. One can't help but celebrate. Bancroft isn't liked at all. He's so driven. And if I'm not mistaken, you'll have an audience," he chuckled.
"What?" Philip gripped his wrist. "I won't have an audience!"
“What?” Philip grabbed his wrist. “I’m not having an audience!”
Saint-Dantin blinked, loosening the clasp on his wrist.
Saint-Dantin blinked, loosening the strap on his wrist.
"Pas si éclatant, Philippe," he said. "You twist and turn like a puppet on wires! I only know that at least five here to-night swear they'll see the fight."
"Not so dazzling, Philippe," he said. "You twist and turn like a puppet on strings! All I know is that at least five people here tonight swear they'll witness the fight."
"But it is monstrous!" objected Philip. "I forbid you to divulge the whereabouts of the meeting."
"But that's outrageous!" protested Philip. "I won't let you reveal where the meeting is."
"Oh, entendu! But the secret will out."
"Oh, got it! But the secret will come out."
"How am I to keep a steady wrist with a dozen ogling fools watching?" demanded Philip.
"How am I supposed to keep a steady hand with a bunch of clueless idiots staring at me?" Philip asked.
"You must keep it steady," said De Chatelin. "My money's for you, petit Anglais!"
"You need to hold it steady," De Chatelin said. "My money's for you, little Englishman!"
Philip looked genuinely perturbed.
Philip looked truly upset.
"Henri, it is iniquitous! It is not a public exhibition that I engage in! One would say we were gladiators!"
"Henri, this is unfair! I'm not putting on a show for everyone! You'd think we were gladiators!"
"Reste tranquille," grinned De Vangrisse. "We are all backing you, mon petit."
"Stay calm," grinned De Vangrisse. "We’ve all got your back, my little one."
"I trust you'll not forget to inform His Majesty of the rendezvous," said Philip, resorting to bitter sarcasm. "And have you engaged a fiddler to enliven the meeting?"
"I trust you won't forget to let His Majesty know about the meeting," said Philip, using bitter sarcasm. "And have you hired a fiddler to liven up the gathering?"
"Philippe se fâche," teased De Chatelin. "Quiet, little fighting cock!"
"Philippe is getting mad," teased De Chatelin. "Calm down, little fighter!"
"I shall write an ode!" threatened Philip direfully.
"I’m going to write an ode!" threatened Philip seriously.
"Ah no, that is too much!" cried De Vangrisse with feeling.
"Ah no, that's too much!" exclaimed De Vangrisse with emotion.
"And I shall read it to you before I engage. Well?"
"And I’ll read it to you before I get involved. Okay?"
"It is a heavy price to pay," answered Paul, "but not too heavy for the entertainment."
"It’s a steep price to pay," Paul replied, "but it’s not too steep for the entertainment."
TenTen
In Which a Letter Is ReadIn Which a Letter Is Read
Cleone sat on a stool at Sir Maurice's knee and sighed. So did Sir Maurice, and knew that they sighed for the same thing.
Cleone sat on a stool beside Sir Maurice and sighed. Sir Maurice sighed too, knowing they were both longing for the same thing.
"Well, my dear," he said, trying to speak cheerfully, "how is your mamma?"
"Well, my dear," he said, trying to sound cheerful, "how is your mom?"
"The same as ever, I thank you," answered Cleone.
"Just like always, thank you," Cleone replied.
Sir Maurice patted her hand.
Sir Maurice squeezed her hand.
"And how is little Cleone?"
"And how's little Cleone?"
"Oh, sir, can you ask? I am very well," she said, with great sprightliness. "And you?"
"Oh, sir, can you believe it? I'm doing very well," she replied, with a lively spirit. "And how about you?"
Sir Maurice was more honest.
Sir Maurice was more truthful.
"To tell the truth, my dear, I miss that young scamp."
"Honestly, my dear, I miss that young rascal."
Cleone played with her fingers, her head bent.
Cleone played with her fingers, her head down.
"Do you, sir? He should be home again ere long. Do you—do you yet know where he is?"
"Do you, sir? He should be back home soon. Do you—do you know where he is yet?"
"No. That does not worry me. My family does not write letters."
"Nope. That doesn't concern me. My family doesn't send letters."
"Mr. Tom—has not told you, I suppose."
"Mr. Tom—hasn't told you, I guess."
"No. I've not seen Tom for some time.... The boy has been away six months now. Gad, but I'd like to see him walk in at that door!"
"No. I haven't seen Tom in a while.... He’s been away for six months now. Wow, I’d love to see him walk through that door!"
Cleone's head sank a little lower.
Cleone's head dropped slightly.
"Do you think—harm could have come to him, sir?"
"Do you think he could have been harmed, sir?"
"No. Else had I heard. Faith, it's our own fault, Cleone, and we are grumbling!"
"No. Else I would have heard. Honestly, it's our own fault, Cleone, and we're complaining!"
"I never—"
"I never—"
"My dear, don't pretend to me! Do you think I don't know?"
"My dear, don’t play games with me! Do you think I’m clueless?"
Cleone was silent.
Cleone was quiet.
"We sent Philip to acquire polish. Heaven knows what has happened to him! Would you care greatly if he returned—without the polish, child?"
"We sent Philip to get some polish. Who knows what’s happened to him! Would you really care if he came back—without the polish, kid?"
"No!" whispered Cleone.
"No!" Cleone whispered.
"Nor should I. Strange! But I should prefer it, I confess."
"Nor should I. Odd! But I would actually prefer it, I admit."
"Do you think—do you think he—he will be—very elegant, Sir Maurice?"
"Do you think—do you think he—he will be—very stylish, Sir Maurice?"
He smiled.
He smiled.
"I fear not, Cleone. Can you see our Philip tricked up in town clothes, apeing town ways?"
"I’m not worried, Cleone. Can you see our Philip dressed up in city clothes, trying to act like he's from the city?"
"N—no."
"No way."
There was silence for a few minutes.
There was silence for a few minutes.
"Sir Maurice."
"Sir Maurice."
"My dear?"
"Hey there?"
"Mamma has a letter from my aunt, Lady Malmerstoke."
"Mom has a letter from my aunt, Lady Malmerstoke."
"So? And what does she say therein?"
"So? What does she say in there?"
"She—she wants me to go to her for the season."
"She wants me to go to her for the season."
Sir Maurice looked down at her.
Sir Maurice looked down at her.
"And you are going?"
"And you're going?"
"I don't—know. I—do not wish to leave you, sir."
"I don't know. I don't want to leave you, sir."
"That is very kind of you, child. But I'd not have you stay for my sake."
"That’s very nice of you, kid. But I wouldn’t want you to stay just for me."
"It's no such thing, sir. I do not want to go."
"It's nothing like that, sir. I don't want to go."
"Why, Cleone, not for the season? Think of the balls and the routs."
"Why, Cleone, why not for the season? Think about the parties and the events."
"I don't—care about it." It was a forlorn little voice, and Sir Maurice patted her hand again.
"I don't care about it." It was a sad little voice, and Sir Maurice patted her hand again.
"Tut-tut, my love!"
"Come on, my love!"
Another silence.
Another pause.
"I do not think it is very kind in Philip to stay away from you for so long a time," said Cleone wistfully.
"I don't think it's very considerate of Philip to stay away from you for such a long time," Cleone said with a sigh.
"You forget, dear. I sent him. He is but obeying me."
"You forget, dear. I sent him. He’s just following my orders."
"And—and me."
"And me too."
Sir Maurice found nothing to say to that.
Sir Maurice had nothing to say to that.
"Was I—perhaps—very wicked—to—to—do what he said—I did?"
"Was I—maybe—really bad—to—to—do what he said I did?"
"What was that, Cleone?"
"What was that, Cleone?"
"Th—throw away—an honest man's love for—for—oh, you know the things he said!"
"Throw away an honest man's love for—oh, you know what he said!"
"Silly young fool! You gave him his just deserts, Cleone. And you may vouch for it that he will be back here at your feet in a very short while."
"Silly young fool! You gave him what he deserves, Cleone. And you can bet he’ll be back here at your feet really soon."
Cleone glanced up through her lashes.
Cleone looked up through her lashes.
"Do you really think so?" she asked eagerly.
"Do you really think that?" she asked eagerly.
"Of course I do!" he answered stoutly.
"Of course I do!" he replied confidently.
Just then a bell clanged somewhere in the distance. Cleone jumped up and ran to the window which looked out on the avenue. She tip-toed, craning her neck to see who stood in the porch.
Just then, a bell rang somewhere in the distance. Cleone jumped up and ran to the window that overlooked the street. She tiptoed, stretching her neck to see who was standing on the porch.
"Why, it is Sir Harold Bancroft!" she exclaimed.
"Wow, it's Sir Harold Bancroft!" she exclaimed.
"Plague take him, then!" said Sir Maurice, disagreeably. "I can't stand the fellow or his sprig of a son!"
"Curse him, then!" said Sir Maurice, irritably. "I can't stand that guy or his snobby son!"
Cleone blushed and continued to stand with her back to the room until footsteps sounded along the passage, and the door opened to admit the visitor.
Cleone blushed and kept her back to the room until she heard footsteps in the hallway, and the door opened to let the visitor in.
Sir Maurice rose.
Sir Maurice stood up.
"Give ye good den, Bancroft. It's good of you to come to visit me this cold day."
"Good afternoon, Bancroft. It's nice of you to come visit me on this cold day."
Bancroft wrung the thin hand, pressing Sir Maurice's rings into his fingers. He bowed jerkily to the curtseying Cleone, and blurted forth his errand.
Bancroft squeezed the thin hand, pressing Sir Maurice's rings into his fingertips. He awkwardly bowed to the curtsying Cleone and rushed to explain his purpose.
"'Tis a joke I must have you share! 'Twill be the death of you, I vow. You knew my son was in Paris?"
"It's a joke I need you to share! It will be the end of you, I promise. You knew my son was in Paris?"
Sir Maurice put forward a chair.
Sir Maurice offered a seat.
"Really? No, I did not know."
"Seriously? I had no clue."
"Well, he is. And"—a chuckle escaped him—"so is yours!"
"Well, he is. And"—he chuckled—"so is yours!"
"Oh!" It was a smothered exclamation from Cleone.
"Oh!" It was a muffled exclamation from Cleone.
Sir Maurice smiled.
Sir Maurice grinned.
"I guessed as much," he said, quite untruthfully. "Have you news from Henry?"
"I figured as much," he said, completely untruthfully. "Do you have any news from Henry?"
"No, not I! But I've a letter from an old friend of mine—Satterthwaite. Do ye know him?"
"No, not me! But I have a letter from an old friend of mine—Satterthwaite. Do you know him?"
Sir Maurice shook his head. Having seen his guest into a chair, he sat down on the couch, and beckoned Cleone to his side.
Sir Maurice shook his head. After helping his guest into a chair, he sat down on the couch and signaled for Cleone to come over.
"No. He, too, is in Paris?"
"No. Is he also in Paris?"
"Ay. Now wait while I find the letter! You'll split o' laughter when you've heard me read it!" He rummaged in his capacious pockets, and drew forth two or three crumpled sheets. These he spread out, and proceeded to find the place.
"Hey. Just hold on while I find the letter! You'll bust out laughing when you hear me read it!" He searched through his big pockets and pulled out a couple of crumpled sheets. He spread them out and started to find the right spot.
"'I trust....' No, that's not it! 'We are' ... Hum, hum, hum! Ah, here we have it! Just listen to this!" He held the parchment close to his nose and began to read:
"'I trust....' No, that's not it! 'We are' ... Hmm, hmm, hmm! Ah, here it is! Just listen to this!" He held the parchment up to his nose and started to read:
"'... Whom should I meet but your boy, Henry! I had no notion he was in Paris, or I should have sought him out, you may depend. The manner of my meeting with him was most singular, as you will agree, and it is the more interesting as the occasion affords the subject for the latest joke of Paris, nay, I may almost say scandal, though to be sure I mean not our meeting, but that which I am about to relate....' A bit involved, that," remarked Bancroft, frowning.
"'... Who should I run into but your son, Henry! I had no idea he was in Paris, or I would have definitely gone to find him. The way I met him was quite unusual, as you'll agree, and it's even more intriguing since it provides the basis for the latest joke in Paris, or I could almost call it a scandal, though I certainly don't mean our meeting, but rather what I'm about to tell you....' A bit complicated, that," Bancroft said, frowning.
"Not at all," said Sir Maurice. "I understand perfectly."
"Not at all," said Sir Maurice. "I totally get it."
"Well, it's more than I do! However: 'I came upon Moosoo de Château-Banvau the other day....'"
"Well, it's more than I do! But: 'I ran into Moosoo de Château-Banvau the other day....'"
"Château-Banvau!"
"Chateau-Banvau!"
"Eh? Do ye know him?"
"Eh? Do you know him?"
"Do I know him! As I know my brother!"
"Do I know him? Just like I know my brother!"
"Fancy! There's a coincidence! But there's more to come! Where was I? Oh, yes—'came upon Moosoo de Château-Banvau the other day and found him in great amusement, which he offered me to share, and the which I agreed to. He propounded me the joke that we were to see, and one in which his protégé, a Mr. Philip Jettan, was the part cause of and your son, Henry, the other!' Gad, that's a fine sentence! Are ye listening to me, Jettan?"
"Wow! What a coincidence! But there's more to come! Where was I? Oh, right—I ran into Moosoo de Château-Banvau the other day and found him having a great time. He invited me to join him, and I accepted. He told me a joke that we were about to see, where his protégé, Mr. Philip Jettan, was partly involved, along with your son, Henry, being the other part! That's a great sentence, isn't it? Are you listening to me, Jettan?"
There was no need to ask that question. Both his auditors had their whole attention fixed on him. Satisfied, he continued: "'This young Jettan is, so says the Marquis, the craze of Fashionable Paris, the ladies' darling'—do ye hear that now?—'and the maddest young scamp that you could wish for. Then the Marquis further told me that Henry was in Paris and engaged to fight a duel with this Jettan.'"
There was no need to ask that question. Both his listeners were fully focused on him. Confident, he continued: "'This young Jettan is, according to the Marquis, the latest sensation in Fashionable Paris, the ladies' favorite'—are you hearing this?—'and the wildest young troublemaker you could imagine. Then the Marquis also told me that Henry was in Paris and set to duel with this Jettan.'"
"Oh, heavens!" cried Cleone.
"Oh, my gosh!" cried Cleone.
"Ye may well say so, my dear! Now, wait a while—the joke's against me, I confess, but I had to tell you—'The cause whereof, it is rumoured, is some lady whom both are enamoured of, some French wench, I think.'"
"You can definitely say that, my dear! Now, hold on a moment—the joke’s on me, I admit, but I had to let you know—'The reason, it’s said, is some lady that both are in love with, some French girl, I believe.'"
Cleone was rigid. Her fingers tightened unconsciously on Sir Maurice's arm.
Cleone was tense. Her fingers gripped Sir Maurice's arm unconsciously.
"'Jettan being a great favourite among the young sparks here, they all, having got wind of the affair, combined among themselves, laying wagers about the fight, the most of the money being laid on Jettan, as I hear. Then to bait him, or what-not, they conspired to be present at the meeting despite Jettan's protests. The Marquis laughed mightily here, and said that Jettan threatened to read them an ode should they appear, which he seemed to find vastly entertaining on account of some joke or other concerning Jettan's poetry.'"
"Jettan is really popular among the young guys here, and when they heard about the situation, they all teamed up, placing bets on the fight, with most of the money on Jettan, from what I hear. To provoke him, or whatever, they planned to show up at the meeting even though Jettan didn't want them there. The Marquis found this hilarious and mentioned that Jettan threatened to read them a poem if they came, which he found extremely amusing due to some joke or other about Jettan's poetry."
"Philip's poetry?..." said Sir Maurice faintly. "Proceed, Bancroft."
"Philip's poetry?..." said Sir Maurice softly. "Go ahead, Bancroft."
"Ay, wait a bit! Here we are: 'The Marquis was going to be present, having heard of the rumour, and swore to take me along with him. The which I did consent to, as you may imagine. Well, we came out to Neuilly in due course at half-after eight one morning, and mighty cold it was, but that's neither here nor there. There we found a fair gathering of young rakes with their horses or chariots, some half dozen in all, laying wagers and all mightily amused. And, stap me, if there was not a fiddler scraping away as if his life depended on it. Soon after we were come, up drives a coach and out jumps three men, the first in great disorder at finding so many there assembled. This was Jettan, and prodigious elegant and finicky he was, too, all patched and painted, and tricked up in velvets and silks and I don't know what. He fell into a great rage, though he was laughing half the time, and, indeed, 'twas a ridiculous situation, and he could scarce help but to be tickled by it. He turns to his seconds and rates them, but they were too amused to do aught but to hold their sides. Then young Jettan orders us all off and especially begs the Marquis to exert his influence, which he would not do. Then Jettan appealed to us to withdraw, whereat they were all the more entertained, and adjured him to se taire, as they call it, calling him petit Philippe and the like. Then Jettan started to laugh himself and pulls out a roll of parchment from his pocket, and was for declaiming some ode he had writ, but that three of them took it from him. Then he says, "At least, send that damned fiddler away!" and they replied, "All in good time," but 'twas himself had asked for him. Before he could say more, which he was about to do, up comes another coach, and out gets your boy, Henry, and his seconds. When they saw what was toward they were mightily put out, as you may imagine, and, indeed, Henry was white and purple with rage, saying this was an insult and he was not to be so mocked, and the like. His seconds spoke apart with young Jettan's, and I give you my word, they were dancing with fury, at least one was, but the little one seemed more entertained. Then up comes Jettan, very solemn and dignified, and bows to Henry. "I ask you to believe, moosoo," says he, "that this is none of my designing. I desire," says he, "to offer you my apologies for my friends' ill-timed pleasantry." Henry could scarce mouth forth a word, so enraged was he, and was for retiring at once, saying that he had borne much, but this was too much. The fiddler was ordered to stop his scraping now, and the onlookers all vowed they had come with serious intent to watch the fight, and would not go until they had done so. Jettan offers to meet Henry another day, when and where he will, but I could see Henry was burning to run him through. "Since we are here," says he, "let us go on with it. I await your convenience," he says, and, "I thank you," replies Jettan and stands back. Henry's seconds were all for retiring, but he'd have none of it, and bids them go to and choose the ground. At last all was prepared, and the two stripped off their coats and vests. Everyone was becomingly sober now, and, indeed, mighty anxious for young Jettan, who is the smaller of the two, and Henry looking murder as he was. Henry fought devilish hard, and, indeed, is a cunning fencer, as you no doubt apprehend, but young Jettan was like a bit of quicksilver, in and out with his sword most finicky and dainty. Soon we saw that Henry was no match for him at all, and, indeed, could have been run through the body a score of times, Jettan playing with him very pretty to see, but I was sore distressed to see Henry so put to it. He gave Jettan but the faintest scratch, and before we knew what was to do, there was Henry reeling back and his sword on the ground. At which Jettan bows very polite, and but a mite out of breath, and picks up the sword and hands it to Henry. Henry was for continuing, and a brave lad he is, but the seconds would have none of it, and 'twas all over. "I trust you are satisfied, sir?" says Jettan. "Satisfied be damned!" pants Henry, clutching at his shoulder. "Of the other matter between us," says Jettan, "I can only counsel you to remember, for I meant what I said." Then he walks off and we rode away.'" Bancroft stopped. "I saw the joke was against me. What do ye think of that, Sir Maurice?"
"Ay, wait a bit! Here we are: 'The Marquis was going to be there since he heard the rumor, and he promised to take me with him. I agreed, as you might imagine. So, we made our way to Neuilly around half past eight one morning, and it was really cold, but that's neither here nor there. When we arrived, we found a fair group of young rakes with their horses or carriages, about six of them in total, placing bets and seeming quite entertained. And, I swear, there was a fiddler playing like his life depended on it. Shortly after we got there, a coach pulled up, and three men hopped out. The first was in quite a frenzy upon seeing so many people gathered. This was Jettan, and he was incredibly fancy and particular, all dressed up in patches, paints, velvets, silks, and who knows what else. He got really angry, though he was laughing half the time, and honestly, it was a ridiculous situation, and he could hardly contain his amusement. He turned to his seconds and scolded them, but they were too entertained to do anything but double over with laughter. Then young Jettan ordered us all to leave and specifically asked the Marquis to use his influence, which he refused to do. Jettan then appealed to us to exit, making them even more amused, and they urged him to se taire, as they call it, teasing him with names like petit Philippe. Then Jettan started laughing himself and pulled out a roll of parchment from his pocket to recite some poem he had written, but three of them took it from him. Then he said, "At least, get that damned fiddler out of here!" and they replied, "All in good time," but it was he who had asked for the fiddler. Before he could say more, another coach arrived, and out came your boy, Henry, and his seconds. When they realized what was happening, they were understandably upset, and honestly, Henry looked furious and hurt, saying this was an insult and he wouldn't take such mockery. His seconds talked privately with young Jettan's, and I swear, one was practically dancing with rage while the smaller one seemed more amused. Then Jettan approached, very serious and dignified, and bowed to Henry. "Please believe me, moosoo,” he said, “this is not my doing. I want to apologize for my friends' thoughtless teasing." Henry could barely speak, so enraged was he, and he wanted to leave immediately, saying he had endured enough, but this was too much. The fiddler was ordered to stop playing now, and the onlookers all claimed they had come with serious intent to watch the fight and wouldn't leave until it was done. Jettan offered to meet Henry another day, whenever and wherever he chose, but I could see Henry was itching to take him down. "Since we’re here," he said, "let’s just go ahead with it. I’m ready whenever you are," and Jettan replied, "Thank you," and stepped back. Henry's seconds wanted to leave, but he wouldn’t hear of it and told them to pick the place. Finally, everything was set, and the two took off their coats and vests. Everyone was now quite serious, and honestly, very anxious for young Jettan, who was the smaller of the two, while Henry looked like he meant business. Henry fought very hard and, indeed, is a skilled fencer, as you probably know, but young Jettan was like quicksilver, darting in and out with his sword in a very precise and delicate manner. Soon it became obvious that Henry was no match for him at all, and honestly, he could have been killed a dozen times; Jettan was toying with him in a way that was impressive to watch, but I was deeply troubled to see Henry struggling so much. He barely scratched Jettan, and before we knew it, Henry was stumbling back and his sword hit the ground. At that, Jettan bowed politely, a bit out of breath, picked up the sword, and handed it back to Henry. Henry wanted to continue, and he is a brave lad, but the seconds wouldn't allow it, and it was all over. "I hope you're satisfied, sir?" Jettan asked. "Satisfied, my foot!" Henry gasped, clutching his shoulder. "Regarding our other matter," Jettan said, "I can only advise you to remember this, for I meant what I said." Then he walked off, and we rode away.'" Bancroft stopped. "I saw the joke was on me. What do you think of that, Sir Maurice?"
Sir Maurice drew a deep breath.
Sir Maurice took a deep breath.
"My God, I would I had been there!" he said fervently.
"Man, I wish I had been there!" he said passionately.
"Ay, 'twould have been a fine sight, I vow! But did ye ever hear the like of it? Philip and the petticoats, eh? These lads, Sir Maurice! These lads! Satterthwaite says he writes madrigals and what-not to the ladies' eyelashes!" Bancroft went off into a long chuckle. "And so ruffled my young hot-head, who had always a way with the petticoats!"
"Aye, that would have been quite a sight, I swear! But have you ever heard anything like it? Philip and the girls, huh? These guys, Sir Maurice! These guys! Satterthwaite says he writes love songs and such for the ladies' eyelashes!" Bancroft burst into a long laugh. "And that really riled up my young hothead, who always had a way with the girls!"
Cleone rose and walked to the window. She opened it, cooling her hot cheeks. And there she stayed, seated on the low couch that ran under the window, until Bancroft finally took his departure.
Cleone stood up and walked to the window. She opened it to cool her warm cheeks. And there she remained, sitting on the low couch beneath the window, until Bancroft finally left.
When Sir Maurice returned from seeing his guest out of the house, he found her pale again, and very stiff.
When Sir Maurice came back from seeing his guest out, he found her pale again and very stiff.
"Ahem!" said Sir Maurice. Then, brusquely: "Pack o' lies!"
"Ahem!" said Sir Maurice. Then, abruptly: "A bunch of lies!"
"Do you think so?" said Cleone hopefully.
"Do you really think so?" Cleone said, feeling hopeful.
"Of course I do! The boy is but doing what I told him to do—acquiring polish and savoir faire with your sex, my dear."
"Of course I do! The boy is just doing what I told him to do—gaining refinement and savoir faire with your gender, my dear."
Cleone sprang up.
Cleone jumped up.
"You told him to—oh, how could you, sir?"
"You told him to—oh, how could you, man?"
"My dear, it's less than nothing, I dare swear. But Philip worsting Bancroft like that! Philip the pet of Society! Gad, I never hoped for this!"
"My dear, it's nothing at all, I swear. But Philip getting the better of Bancroft like that! Philip, the favorite of Society! Wow, I never expected this!"
"Nor I," said Cleone bitterly. "And—and 'tis my own—f-fault—for—s-sending him away—s-so c-cruelly, but—but—oh, how dare he?"
"Not me," Cleone said bitterly. "And—it's my own fault—for sending him away so cruelly, but—oh, how dare he?"
Sir Maurice was silent.
Sir Maurice stayed quiet.
"He—he—I thought he—" she broke off, biting her lip. After a slight pause she spoke again, with would-be lightness. "I—do you know, I think I shall go to my aunt after all?"
"He—he—I thought he—" she paused, biting her lip. After a brief moment, she tried to sound casual and spoke again. "I—do you know, I think I’m going to go to my aunt after all?"
"Will you, my dear?" said Sir Maurice.
"Will you, my dear?" asked Sir Maurice.
That evening he was moved to write to his brother, an infrequent proceeding. The outcome of that letter was a brief note from Tom, which reached Philip a week later.
That evening, he felt compelled to write to his brother, something he did rarely. The result of that letter was a short note from Tom, which arrived for Philip a week later.
"Dear Nephew,—The Devil's in it now and no Mistake. Old Satterthwaite was Present at your crazy Duel, and has writ the whole Tale to Harry Bancroft, who, curse him for an interfering old Fool, read it to your Father and Cleone. The Tale is that you and B. quarrelled over some French Minx, which may be True for all I know. In any Case, Cleone is monstrous put out, and Comes to Towne to her Aunt, old Sally Malmerstoke. Maurice writes me this and demands your Return, being Upset for the Girl's sake, but secretly Delighted at the Story, if I read his Letter aright. Do as you please, dear Boy, but I warn you, Cleone is in the Mood for any Madness, as is the way when a Maid thinks herself slighted. And she is a Prodigious pretty Chit. My love to Château-Banvau and to Yr Self.—Tom."
"Dear Nephew, — It’s a real mess now, no doubt about it. Old Satterthwaite witnessed your ridiculous duel and told the whole story to Harry Bancroft, who, damn him for being an nosy old fool, shared it with your father and Cleone. The story goes that you and B. fought over some French girl, which could be true, for all I know. In any case, Cleone is extremely upset and is heading to her aunt, old Sally Malmerstoke, in town. Maurice wrote to me about this and is urging your return, worried about the girl but secretly pleased by the drama, if I interpret his letter correctly. Do as you wish, dear boy, but I warn you, Cleone is in the mood for all sorts of trouble, which happens when a girl feels overlooked. And she’s an incredibly pretty girl. My love to Château-Banvau and to you.—Tom."
Eleven11
Philip Astonishes His UnclePhilip Shocks His Uncle
Thomas, deep in the latest copy of the Rambler, was aroused by the sound of wheels drawing up outside the house. He rose and stretched himself, wondering who could choose such a day wherein to visit him. He strolled to the window and peered out into the foggy street. He was surprised to see, not a light town-chariot, but a large travelling coach, top-heavy with baggage, and drawn by four steaming horses. As he watched, the door of the vehicle was thrown open and a slight gentleman sprang out, not waiting for the steps to be let down. He was muffled in a many-caped overcoat of Parisian cut, and shining leather boots were on his feet. Tom was puzzled. Then, from out the coach, issued two other men, evidently servants, the one small and wiry, the other lank and cadaverous. Both seemed depressed. The man in the well-cut cloak waved his hands at them and appeared to shoot forth a number of instructions. The little man, scarcely visible beneath the bandboxes that he carried, nodded, shivered, and rounded on the lean man. Then the man in the cloak turned, and ran up the steps to Tom's front door. A long bell-peal sounded through the house.
Thomas, deeply engrossed in the latest issue of the Rambler, was startled by the sound of wheels stopping outside his house. He got up and stretched, wondering who would choose such a day to visit him. He walked to the window and peeked out into the foggy street. He was surprised to see not a light town carriage, but a large traveling coach, overflowing with luggage and pulled by four panting horses. As he watched, the door of the vehicle swung open, and a slender gentleman jumped out, not waiting for the steps to be lowered. He was wrapped in a multi-caped overcoat of French style, with shiny leather boots on his feet. Tom was confused. Then, two other men, clearly servants, emerged from the coach; one was small and wiry, while the other was tall and thin. Both looked downtrodden. The man in the dapper cloak gestured with his hands and seemed to issue several commands. The little man, barely visible under the load of hatboxes he was carrying, nodded, shivered, and turned to the lanky man. Then the man in the cloak turned and rushed up the steps to Tom's front door. A long peal of the doorbell rang through the house.
Tom walked to the fire and stood with his back to it. Possibly this was his friend Mainwaring come to visit him, but why did he bring so much baggage? Tom rather hoped that the unknown guest had come to his house in mistake for another's.
Tom walked over to the fire and stood with his back to it. Maybe it was his friend Mainwaring paying him a visit, but why was he carrying so much stuff? Tom secretly hoped that the unexpected guest had accidentally come to his place thinking it was someone else's.
But a quick tread came across the hall and the door of the library was swept open. Hat in hand, the visitor stood before Tom, bowing.
But a quick step came down the hall and the door of the library swung open. Hat in hand, the visitor stood in front of Tom, bowing.
"Revered uncle, I kiss your hands!" And he proceeded to do so.
"Beloved uncle, I kiss your hands!" And he went ahead and did it.
"God ha' mercy, it's Philip!" gasped Tom. "I never expected you for another week, lad!"
"God have mercy, it’s Philip!" gasped Tom. "I didn’t expect you for another week, kid!"
Philip tossed his hat and gloves on to the table and wriggled out of his cloak.
Philip threw his hat and gloves onto the table and slipped off his cloak.
"I am de trop, no?"
"I'm too much, right?"
"Never in your life!" Tom assured him. "Stand up, child, and let me look at you!" Then, as Philip clicked his heels together and faced him, laughing, his eyes widened, and his lips formed a soundless whistle. "By the Lord Harry, Philip, it's marvellous! How could you do it in six months——!"
"Never in your life!" Tom assured him. "Stand up, kid, and let me take a look at you!" Then, as Philip clicked his heels together and faced him, laughing, his eyes widened, and his lips formed a soundless whistle. "By the Lord Harry, Philip, it's amazing! How could you pull it off in six months——!"
Philip rustled over to the fire and stooped, warming his hands.
Philip shuffled over to the fire and bent down, warming his hands.
"Fog, cold, damp! Brrh! The unspeakable climate! Tom, it is permitted that I stay with you until I find an abode?"
"Fog, cold, damp! Brrr! This awful weather! Tom, can I stay with you until I find a place to live?"
With difficulty his uncle withdrew his gape from Philip's claret-coloured coat of fine cloth, laced with gold.
With difficulty, his uncle pulled his gaze away from Philip's deep red coat made of fine fabric, trimmed with gold.
"Can you ask? Stay as long as you will, lad, you're a joy to behold!"
"Feel free to ask! Stay as long as you want, buddy, you’re a pleasure to have around!"
"Merci du compliment!" smiled Philip. "You perhaps admire the mixture of claret and biscuit as I wear it?"
"Thanks for the compliment!" smiled Philip. "Are you perhaps admiring the mix of claret and biscuit as I wear it?"
Tom's eyes travelled down to the creaseless biscuit-coloured small-clothes.
Tom's eyes moved down to the smooth, biscuit-colored underwear.
"Ay. I admire everything. The boots most of all. The boots—Philip, where did you obtain them?"
"Ay. I admire everything. The boots most of all. The boots—Philip, where did you get them?"
Philip glanced carelessly down at his shapely leg.
Philip casually looked down at his shapely leg.
"They were made for me. Me, I am not satisfied with them. I shall give them to François."
"They were made for me. I'm not satisfied with them. I'll give them to François."
"Give them to François?" cried his uncle. "Ye wicked boy! Where is the fellow?"
"Give them to François?" his uncle shouted. "You wicked boy! Where is that guy?"
"He and Jacques are struggling with my baggage and Moggat." He stretched out a detaining hand as Tom started forward to the door. "Ah, do not disturb yourself. I have spoken with ce bon Moggat, and all is well. He will arrange everything."
"He and Jacques are dealing with my luggage and Moggat." He raised a hand to stop Tom as he began to move toward the door. "Oh, don’t worry. I've already talked to ce bon Moggat, and everything is fine. He will take care of everything."
Tom came back.
Tom's back.
"He will be in a frenzy, Philip! All that baggage!"
"He’s going to be in a frenzy, Philip! All that baggage!"
"All—that baggage?" Philip spoke with uplifted brows. "It has arrived?" He went to the window and looked out. "But no, not yet."
"All—that luggage?" Philip said, raising his eyebrows. "It’s here?" He walked to the window and looked outside. "But no, not yet."
"B—but—is there more to come?" asked Tom.
"B—but—is there more to come?" asked Tom.
"But of course! The bulk follows me."
"But of course! The group follows me."
Tom sat down weakly.
Tom sat down tiredly.
"And you who six months ago thought yourself rich in the possession of three coats."
"And you who six months ago believed you were rich because you had three coats."
Philip came back to the fire. He made a little grimace of distaste.
Philip returned to the fire, making a slight grimace of disgust.
"Those far-off days! That is ended—completely!"
"Those distant days are over!"
Tom cast him a shrewd glance.
Tom gave him a sharp glance.
"What, all of it? Cleone?"
"What, all of this? Cleone?"
"Ah!" Philip smiled. "That is—another—matter. I have to thank you for your letter, Tom."
"Ah!" Philip smiled. "That’s—another—thing. I need to thank you for your letter, Tom."
"It brought you back?"
"Did it bring you back?"
"En partie. She is here?"
"Partly. Is she here?"
"Ay, with Sally Malmerstoke. She is already noticed. Sally takes her everywhere. She is now looked for—and courted." His eyes twinkled.
"Yeah, with Sally Malmerstoke. She's already being noticed. Sally brings her everywhere. Now people are looking for her—and trying to win her over." His eyes sparkled.
"Oho!" said Philip. He poured out a glass of burgundy from the decanter that stood on a small table. "So she is furious with me, yes?"
"Oho!" Philip exclaimed. He poured a glass of burgundy from the decanter on the small table. "So she's really angry with me, right?"
"So I believe. Satterthwaite wrote that you and Bancroft fought over the fair name of some French lass. Did you?"
"So I believe. Satterthwaite mentioned that you and Bancroft had a disagreement over the honor of some French girl. Is that true?"
Philip sipped his wine.
Philip drank his wine.
"Not a whit. 'Twas her own fair name, à vrai dire."
"Not at all. It was her own beautiful name, to be honest."
"Oh! You'll tell her that, of course?"
"Oh! You'll tell her that, right?"
"Not at all."
"Not at all."
Tom stared.
Tom was staring.
"What then? Have you some deep game in mind, Philip?"
"What’s going on? Do you have some big plan in mind, Philip?"
"Perhaps. Oh, I don't know! I thank her for reforming me, but, being human, I am hurt and angry! Le petit Philippe se fâche," he said, smiling suddenly. "He would see whether it is himself she loves, or—a painted puppet. It's foolish, but what would you?"
"Maybe. Oh, I have no idea! I'm grateful to her for helping me change, but, being human, I'm hurt and angry! Le petit Philippe se fâche," he said, smiling suddenly. "He would want to find out if it’s really him she loves, or just—a painted puppet. It’s silly, but what can you do?"
"So you are now a painted puppet?" said Tom politely.
"So, you're a painted puppet now?" Tom said politely.
"What else?"
"What else is there?"
"Dear me!" said Tom, and relapsed into profound meditation.
"Wow!" said Tom, and fell into deep thought.
"I want to have her love me for—myself, and not for my clothes, or my airs and graces. It's incomprehensible?"
"I want her to love me for who I am, not for my clothes or my pretentiousness. Is that really so hard to understand?"
"Not entirely," answered Tom. "I understand your feelings. What's to do?"
"Not really," Tom replied. "I get how you feel. What should we do?"
"Merely my baggage," said Philip, with another glance towards the window. "It is the coach that you hear."
"Just my luggage," Philip said, glancing at the window again. "It's the coach you hear."
"No, not that." Tom listened. Voices raised in altercation sounded in the hall.
"No, not that." Tom listened. Raised voices arguing could be heard in the hall.
Philip laughed.
Philip chuckled.
"That is the inimitable François. I do not think that Moggat finds favour in his eyes."
"That’s the one and only François. I don’t think Moggat has his approval."
"I'll swear he does not find favour in Moggat's eyes! Who is the other one?"
"I swear he doesn't have Moggat's approval! Who's the other one?"
"Jacques, my groom and homme à tout faire!"
"Jacques, my groom and handyman!"
"Faith, ye've a retinue!"
"Faith, you have a crew!"
"What would you?" shrugged Philip. He sat down opposite his uncle, and stretched his legs to the fire. "Heigh-ho! I do not like this weather."
"What would you?" Philip shrugged. He sat down across from his uncle and stretched his legs out toward the fire. "Ugh! I really don’t like this weather."
"Nor anyone else. What are you going to do, now that you have returned?"
"Not anyone else. What are you going to do now that you're back?"
"Who knows? I make my bow to London Society, I amuse myself a little—ah yes! and I procure a house."
"Who knows? I introduce myself to London Society, I have some fun—oh yes! and I get a house."
"Do you make your bow to Cleone?"
"Do you kneel to Cleone?"
An impish smile danced into Philip's eyes.
An mischievous smile sparkled in Philip's eyes.
"I present myself to Cleone—as she would have had me. A drawling, conceited, and mincing fop. Which I am not, believe me!"
"I show myself to Cleone just as she would have wanted me to. A slow-speaking, arrogant, and overly delicate dandy. But that's not who I am, trust me!"
Tom considered him.
Tom thought about him.
"No, you're not. You don't drawl."
"No, you're not. You don't speak in a drawl."
"I shall drawl," promised Philip. "And I shall be very languid."
"I'll drag things out," promised Philip. "And I'll be really slow-moving."
"It's the fashion, of course. You did not adopt it?"
"It's the trend, of course. You didn't pick it up?"
"It did not entice me. I am le petit sans repos, and le petit Philippe au Cœur Perdu, and petit original. Hé, hé, I shall be homesick! It is inevitable."
"It didn't tempt me. I am the little restless one, and little Philippe with the Lost Heart, and little original. Hey, hey, I'm going to miss home! It's unavoidable."
"Are you so much at home in Paris?" asked Tom, rather surprised. "You liked the Frenchies?"
"Are you really at home in Paris?" Tom asked, a bit surprised. "Did you like the French?"
"Liked them! Could I have disliked them?"
"Liked them! Could I have not liked them?"
"I should have thought it possible—for you. Did you make many friends?"
"I thought it might be possible—for you. Did you make a lot of friends?"
"A revendre! They took me to their bosoms."
"For sale! They hugged me."
"Did they indeed! Who do you count amongst your intimates?"
"Did they really! Who do you consider your close friends?"
"Saint-Dantin—you know him?"
"Saint-Dantin—you know him?"
"I've met him. Tall and dark?"
"I've met him. Is he tall and dark?"
"Ay. Paul de Vangrisse, Jules de Bergeret, Henri de Chatelin—oh, I can't tell you! They are all charming!"
"Ay. Paul de Vangrisse, Jules de Bergeret, Henri de Chatelin—oh, I can't even explain! They're all wonderful!"
"And the ladies?"
"And the women?"
"Also charming. Did you ever meet Clothilde de Chaucheron, or Julie de Marcherand? Ah, voilà ce qui fait ressouvenir! I count that rondeau one of my most successful efforts. You shall hear it some time or other."
"Also charming. Have you ever met Clothilde de Chaucheron or Julie de Marcherand? Ah, that brings back memories! I consider that rondeau one of my best works. You'll hear it someday."
"That what?" ejaculated Tom, sitting upright in his surprise.
"That what?" Tom exclaimed, sitting up in surprise.
"A rondeau: 'To the Pearl that Trembles in her Ear.' I would you could have seen it."
"A rondeau: 'To the Pearl that Trembles in her Ear.' I wish you could have seen it."
"Which? The rondeau?"
"Which? The rondeau?"
"The pearl, man! The rondeau you shall most assuredly see."
"The pearl, man! The rondeau you definitely need to check out."
"Merciful heaven!" gasped Tom. "A rondeau! Philip—poet! Sacr-ré mille petits cochons!"
"Merciful heaven!" gasped Tom. "A rondeau! Philip—poet! Sacré mille petits cochons!"
"Monsieur dines at home this evening?" asked François.
"Monsieur, are you having dinner at home this evening?" asked François.
Philip sat at his dressing-table, busy with many pots and his face. He nodded.
Philip sat at his vanity, preoccupied with various containers and his face. He nodded.
"The uncle of Monsieur receives, without doubt?"
"The uncle of Monsieur receives, right?"
"A card-party," said Philip, tracing his eyebrows with a careful hand.
"A card party," Philip said, gently touching his eyebrows.
François skipped to the wardrobe and flung it open. With a finger to his nose he meditated aloud.
François skipped over to the wardrobe and threw it open. With a finger on his nose, he thought out loud.
"The blue and silver ... un peu trop soigné. The orange ... peu convenable. The purple the purple essayons!"
"The blue and silver ... a little too polished. The orange ... not appropriate. The purple the purple let's try!"
Philip opened the rouge-jar.
Philip opened the makeup jar.
"The grey I wore at De Flaubert's last month."
"The gray I wore at De Flaubert's last month."
François clapped a hand to his head.
François slapped his hand on his forehead.
"Ah, sot!" he apostrophised himself. "Voilà qui est très bien." He dived into the wardrobe, emerging presently with the required dress. He laid it on the bed, stroking it lovingly, and darted away to a large chest. From it he brought forth the pink and silver waistcoat that De Bergeret had admired, and the silver lace. Then he paused. "Les bas?... Les bas aux oiseaux-mouches ... où sont-ils?" He peered into a drawer, turning over neat piles of stockings. A convulsion of fury seemed to seize him, and he sped to the door. "Ah, sapristi! Coquin! Jacques!"
"Oh, you fool!" he scolded himself. "This is just perfect." He jumped into the wardrobe and came out a moment later with the dress he needed. He placed it on the bed, caressing it affectionately, then rushed off to a large chest. From it, he pulled out the pink and silver waistcoat that De Bergeret had admired, along with the silver lace. Then he stopped. "Where are the stockings?... The ones with the hummingbirds... where are they?" He looked into a drawer, sifting through neatly stacked stockings. A wave of anger seemed to hit him, and he rushed to the door. "Ah, damn it! Rascal! Jacques!"
In answer to his frenzied call came the cadaverous one, shivering. François seized him by the arm and shook him.
In response to his frantic call came the pale one, trembling. François grabbed his arm and shook him.
"Thou misbegotten son of a toad!" he raved. "Where is the small box I bade you guard with your life? Where is it, I say. Thou—"
"You misbegotten son of a toad!" he raved. "Where is the small box I told you to guard with your life? Where is it, I say. You—"
"I gave it into your hands," said Jacques sadly. "Into your hands, your very hands, in this room here by the door! I swear it."
"I handed it over to you," Jacques said sadly. "To you, your own hands, right here in this room by the door! I swear it."
"Swear it? What is it to me, your swear? I say I have not seen the box! At Dover, what did I do? Nom d'un nom, did I not say to you, lose thy head sooner than that box?" His voice rose higher and higher. "And now, where is it?"
"Swear it? What does your swear mean to me? I say I haven't seen the box! At Dover, what did I do? Nonsense, didn’t I tell you to lose your head before losing that box?" His voice kept getting louder. "And now, where is it?"
"I tell you I gave it you! It is this bleak country that has warped your brain. Never did the box leave my hands until I gave it into yours!"
"I told you I gave it to you! It's this harsh country that has messed with your mind. The box never left my hands until I handed it over to you!"
"And I say you did not! Saperlipopette, am I a fool that I should forget? Now listen to what you have done! You have lost the stockings of Monsieur! By your incalculable stupidity, the stupidity of a pig, an ass—"
"And I say you didn’t! Saperlipopette, am I a fool to forget? Now listen to what you’ve done! You’ve lost Monsieur’s stockings! Because of your unbelievable stupidity, the stupidity of a pig, a donkey—"
"Sacré nom de Dieu! Am I to be disturbed by your shrieking?" Philip had flung down the haresfoot. He slewed round in his chair. "Shut the door! Is it that you wish to annoy my uncle that you shout and scream in his house?" His voice was thunderous.
"Holy name of God! Am I supposed to put up with your screaming?" Philip had tossed aside the haresfoot. He turned sharply in his chair. "Close the door! Are you trying to bother my uncle by shouting and screaming in his home?" His voice was booming.
François spread out his hands.
François opened his hands.
"M'sieur, I ask pardon! It is this âne, this careless gaillard—"
"Mister, I apologize! It’s this donkey, this careless fellow—"
"Mais, m'sieur!" protested Jacques. "It is unjust; it is false!"
"But, sir!" protested Jacques. "It's unfair; it's not true!"
"Ecoutez donc, m'sieur!" begged François, as the stern grey eyes went from his face to that of the unhappy Jacques. "It is the band-box that contains your stockings—the stockings aux oiseaux-mouches! Ah, would that I had carried it myself! Would that—"
"Listen, sir!" begged François, as the stern gray eyes shifted from his face to that of the unhappy Jacques. "It's the box that has your stockings—the stockings with the hummingbirds! Ah, I wish I had carried it myself! I wish that—"
"Would that you would be quiet!" said Philip severely. "If either of you have lost those stockings ..." He paused, and once more his eyes travelled from one to the other. "I shall seek another valet."
"Why don't you just be quiet!" Philip said sharply. "If either of you has lost those stockings ..." He paused, looking back and forth between them. "I'll find another valet."
François became tearful.
François got emotional.
"Ah, no, no, m'sieur! It is this imbécile, this crapaud—"
"Ah, no, no, sir! It is this idiot, this toad—"
"M'sieu, je vous implore—"
"Mister, I implore you—"
Philip pointed dramatically across the room. Both men looked fearfully in the direction of that accusing finger.
Philip pointed dramatically across the room. Both men looked fearfully in the direction of that accusing finger.
"Ah!" François darted forward. "La voilà! What did I say?" He clasped the box to his breast. "What did I say?"
"Ah!" François rushed forward. "There it is! What did I say?" He held the box close to his chest. "What did I say?"
"But it is not so!" cried Jacques. "What did you say? You said you had not seen the box! What did I say? I said—"
"But that's not true!" shouted Jacques. "What did you say? You said you hadn't seen the box! What did I say? I said—"
"Enough!" commanded Philip. "I will not endure this bickering! Be quiet, François! Little monkey that you are!"
"Enough!" Philip shouted. "I won't put up with this arguing! Be quiet, François! You little monkey!"
"M'sieur!" François was hurt. His sharp little face fell into lines of misery.
"Sir!" François was hurt. His sharp little face showed lines of misery.
"Little monkey," continued Philip inexorably, "with more thought for your chattering than for my welfare."
"Little monkey," Philip continued relentlessly, "more focused on your chatter than on my well-being."
"Ah, no, no, m'sieur! I swear it is not so! By the—"
"Ah, no, no, sir! I promise it's not like that! By the—"
"I do not want your oaths," said Philip cruelly. "Am I to wait all night for my cravat, while you revile the good Jacques?"
"I don't want your promises," Philip said harshly. "Am I supposed to wait all night for my tie while you insult the good Jacques?"
François cast the box from him.
François threw the box away from him.
"Ah, misérable! The cravat! Malheureux, get thee gone!" He waved agitated hands at Jacques. "You hinder me! You retard me! You upset Monsieur! Va-t-en!"
"Ah, miserable! The necktie! Unfortunate, get out of here!" He waved his hands frantically at Jacques. "You’re getting in my way! You’re slowing me down! You’re upsetting Monsieur! Go away!"
Jacques obeyed meekly, and Philip turned back to the mirror. To him came François, wreathed once more in smiles.
Jacques complied quietly, and Philip returned his gaze to the mirror. François approached him again, smiling brightly.
"He means well, ce bon Jacques," he said, busy with the cravat. "But he is sot, you understand, très sot!" He pushed Philip's chin up with a gentle hand. "He annoys m'sieur, ah oui! But he is a good garçon, when all is said."
"He means well, that good Jacques," he said, focusing on the cravat. "But he is foolish, you see, very foolish!" He lifted Philip's chin gently. "He annoys you, oh yes! But he is a good guy, when it comes down to it."
"It is you who annoy me," answered Philip. "Not so tight, not so tight! Do you wish to choke me?"
"It’s you who irritate me," Philip replied. "Not so tight, not so tight! Do you want to choke me?"
"Pardon, m'sieur! No, it is not François who annoys you! Ah, mille fois non! François—perhaps he is a little monkey, if m'sieur says so, but he is a very good valet, n'est-ce pas? A monkey, if m'sieur pleases, but very clever with a cravat. M'sieur has said it himself."
"Excuse me, sir! No, it's not François who's bothering you! Oh, definitely not! François—maybe he acts a bit like a monkey, if you say so, but he's a really good servant, right? A monkey, if you like, but very skilled with a tie. You've said so yourself."
"You are a child," said Philip. "Yes, that is very fair." He studied his reflection. "I am pleased with it."
"You’re just a kid," Philip said. "Yeah, that’s totally true." He gazed at his reflection. "I’m happy with it."
"Aha!" François clasped his hands delightedly. "M'sieur is no longer enraged! Voyons, I go to fetch the vest of m'sieur!"
"Aha!" François clapped his hands excitedly. "Sir is no longer angry! Let's see, I'll go get your vest!"
Presently, kneeling before his master and adjusting his stockings, he volunteered another piece of information.
Currently, kneeling in front of his master and fixing his stockings, he offered up another piece of information.
"Me, I have been in this country before. I understand well the ways of it. I understand the English, oh, de part en part! I know them for a foolish race, en somme—saving always m'sieur, who is more French than English—but never, never have I had the misfortune to meet so terrible an Englishman as this servant of m'sieur's uncle, this Moggat. Si entêté, si impoli! He looks on me with a suspicion! I cannot tell m'sieur of his so churlish demeanour! He thinks, perhaps, that I go to take his fine coat. Bah! I spit upon it! I speak to him as m'sieur has bid me—très doucement. He pretends he cannot understand what it is I say! Me, who speak English aussi bien que le Français! Deign to enter into these shoes, m'sieur! I tell him I hold him in contempt! He makes a reniflement in his nose, and he mutters 'damned leetle frog-eater!' Grand Dieu, I could have boxed his ears, the impudent!"
"I’ve been in this country before. I know its ways well. I understand the English, oh, completely! I see them as a foolish people, overall—except for m'sieur, who is more French than English—but I have never, ever met such a terrible Englishman as this servant of m'sieur's uncle, this Moggat. So stubborn, so rude! He looks at me with suspicion! I can’t even explain to m'sieur how churlish he is! He probably thinks I’m going to steal his fine coat. Bah! I spit on it! I speak to him as m'sieur instructed me—very gently. He acts like he can’t understand what I’m saying! Me, who speaks English as well as French! Just imagine if you were in my shoes, m'sieur! I tell him I look down on him! He snorts through his nose and mutters 'damned little frog-eater!' Good God, I could have slapped him, the brat!"
"I hope you did not?" said Philip anxiously.
"I hope you didn't?" Philip said anxiously.
"Ah, bah! Would I so demean myself, m'sieur? It is I who am of a peaceable nature, n'est-ce pas? But Jacques—voyons, c'est autre chose! He is possessed of the hot temper, ce pauvre Jacques. I fear for that Moggat if he enrages our Jacques." He shook his head solemnly, and picked up the grey satin coat. "If m'sieur would find it convenient to rise? Ah, bien!" He coaxed Philip into the coat, bit by bit. "I say to you, m'sieur, I am consumed of an anxiety. Jacques, he is a veritable fire-eater when he is roused, not like me, who am always doux comme un enfant. I think, perhaps, he will refuse to remain in the house with this pig of a Moggat."
"Ah, no way! Would I really lower myself, sir? I'm the peaceful one, right? But Jacques—well, that's a different story! He has a bad temper, poor Jacques. I worry for Moggat if he gets Jacques fired up." He shook his head seriously and picked up the grey satin coat. "If you wouldn't mind getting up, sir? Ah, great!" He helped Philip into the coat, piece by piece. "I have to tell you, sir, I’m really anxious. Jacques can be like a fire-breather when he gets angry, unlike me, who is always gentle as a child. I think he probably won’t want to stay in the house with that pig, Moggat."
Philip shook out his ruffles.
Philip fluffed his ruffles.
"I have never noticed that Jacques showed signs of a so violent temper," he remarked.
"I've never noticed that Jacques had such a violent temper," he said.
"But no! Of a surety, he would not exhibit his terrible passion to m'sieur! Is it that I should permit him?"
"But no! For sure, he wouldn't show his intense feelings to m'sieur! Should I really allow that?"
"Well," Philip slipped a ring on to his finger, "I am sorry for Jacques, but he must be patient. Soon I shall go to a house of my own."
"Well," Philip put a ring on his finger, "I feel sorry for Jacques, but he needs to be patient. Soon, I'll have a place of my own."
François' face cleared as if by magic.
François' face lit up as if by magic.
"M'sieur is kind! A house of his own. Je me rangerai bien! M'sieur contemplates a mariage, perhaps?"
"Mister is kind! A house of his own. I would be happy to settle down! Mister is thinking about a marriage, maybe?"
Philip dropped his snuff-box.
Philip dropped his snuff box.
"Que diable—?" he began, and checked himself. "Mind your own business, François!"
"What the hell—?" he started, then held back. "Mind your own business, François!"
"Ah, pardon, m'sieur!" replied the irrepressible François. "I but thought that m'sieur had the desire to wed, that he should return to England so hurriedly!"
"Oh, excuse me, sir!" replied the unstoppable François. "I just thought that you wanted to get married, considering how quickly you rushed back to England!"
"Hold your tongue!" said Philip sharply. "Understand me, François, I'll have no meddling bavardage about me either to my face or below stairs! C'est entendu?"
"Keep quiet!" Philip said sharply. "Listen to me, François, I won't tolerate any meddling chatter about me either to my face or behind my back! Got it?"
"But yes, m'sieur," said François, abashed. "It is that my tongue runs away with me."
"But yes, sir," said François, embarrassed. "It's just that I can't help but talk too much."
"You'd best keep a guard over it," answered Philip curtly.
"You should really keep an eye on it," Philip replied sharply.
"Yes, m'sieur!" Meekly he handed Philip his cane and handkerchief. Then, as his master still frowned, "M'sieur is still enraged?" he ventured.
"Yes, sir!" He handed Philip his cane and handkerchief with a humble demeanor. Then, noticing his master was still frowning, he cautiously asked, "Are you still upset, sir?"
Philip glanced down at him. At the sight of François' anxious, naïve expression, the frown faded, and he laughed.
Philip looked down at him. Seeing François' worried, innocent expression made the frown disappear, and he laughed.
"You are quite ridiculous," he said.
"You're pretty ridiculous," he said.
François broke into responsive smiles at once.
François immediately broke into responsive smiles.
But when Philip had rustled away to join his uncle, the little valet nodded shrewdly to himself and clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth.
But when Philip had hurried off to join his uncle, the little valet nodded knowingly to himself and clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth.
"En vérité, c'est une femme," he remarked. "C'est ce que j'ai cru."
"Honestly, it's a woman," he said. "That's what I thought."
Twelve12
Philip Plays a Dangerous GamePhilip is Playing with Fire
François endured the detestable Moggat for a week. He was then rewarded for his patience by the news that Philip was shortly to move into a small house in Curzon Street, which belonged to a friend of Tom. This gentleman consented to let his house for the space of two months, as he was going abroad for that time. Philip went to inspect the prospective abode, and found it to be furnished in excellent style. He closed with its owner and went back to Half-Moon Street to break the joyful news to François. From that moment the excitable valet's spirits soared high. He would manage the affairs of the house for M'sieur; he would find M'sieur a chef. Philip was content to waive responsibility. François sallied forth with the air of one about to conquer, to find, so he told Philip, the son of his aunt, a very fair chef and a good garçon. Philip had no idea that François possessed any relations, much less one in London. When he said this, François looked very waggish, and admitted that he himself had forgotten the existence of this cousin until the moment when M'sieur told him of the new home.
François put up with the unbearable Moggat for a week. He was then rewarded for his patience with the news that Philip would soon be moving into a small house on Curzon Street, which belonged to a friend of Tom. This gentleman agreed to rent out his house for two months since he was going abroad during that time. Philip went to check out the potential new place and found it beautifully furnished. He struck a deal with the owner and returned to Half-Moon Street to share the exciting news with François. From that moment, the enthusiastic valet's spirits soared. He would manage the household affairs for his employer; he would find him a chef. Philip was happy to hand over responsibility. François set out with the confidence of someone about to achieve greatness, saying that he would find, as he told Philip, the son of his aunt, a very decent chef and a good garçon. Philip had no idea that François had any relatives, let alone one in London. When he mentioned this, François looked quite playful and admitted that he had forgotten about this cousin until the moment M'sieur told him about the new home.
"Then, subitement, I remember, for m'sieur will require a chef is it not so?"
"Then, suddenly, I remember, because sir will need a chef, right?"
"Assuredly," said Philip. "But your cousin may not wish to take service with me, in which case I shall seek an English cook."
"Definitely," said Philip. "But your cousin might not want to work for me, and if that’s the case, I’ll look for an English cook."
"An English cook? Ah, bah! Is it that I would permit m'sieur to be so ill served? No! M'sieur shall have a French chef, bien sûr. What does an Englishman know of the cuisine? Is m'sieur to be insulted by the tasteless, watery vegetables of such as the wife of Moggat? No! I go to find my cousin!"
"An English cook? Oh, no way! Am I really going to let you be served so poorly? Absolutely not! You’ll have a French chef, of course. What does an Englishman know about cuisine? Are you going to put up with the tasteless, mushy vegetables from someone like Moggat's wife? No way! I'm going to find my cousin!"
"Very well," said Philip.
"Alright," said Philip.
"And then we have a household bien tenu. It is our poor Jacques who could not support an Englishman in the house."
"And then we have a well-maintained household. It's our poor Jacques who couldn't manage having an Englishman in the house."
"I hope I am not to be excluded?" smiled Philip.
"I hope I won’t be left out?" Philip smiled.
"M'sieur se moque de moi! Is it that m'sieur is English? M'sieur is tout comme un Français." He bustled away, full of importance.
"You’re making fun of me! Are you English? You’re just like a Frenchman." He hurried off, full of himself.
The cousin was forthcoming, a stout, good-tempered soul, who rejoiced in the name of Marie-Guillaume. François exhibited him with pride, and he was engaged. That ended all Philip's responsibility. François gathered up the reins of government, and in a week they were installed in Curzon Street. Philip had done no more than say that he wished to enter his new abode on Thursday. On Thursday he went out to Ranelagh; when he returned to Half-Moon Street he found that his baggage had gone. He took his leave of Tom, and walked up the road and round the corner, into Curzon Street. His house was as neat as a new pin; his baggage was unpacked; François was complacent. They might have lived in the house for months; there was no disorder, no fuss, none of the slow settling down. François, Jacques and Marie-Guillaume had fitted into their respective niches in one short hour. Philip was moved to inform François that he was a treasure.
The cousin was friendly, a chunky, easy-going guy, who went by the name Marie-Guillaume. François showed him off with pride, and he was settled in. That ended all of Philip's responsibilities. François took charge of everything, and within a week they were settled in Curzon Street. Philip had only mentioned that he wanted to move into his new place on Thursday. On Thursday he went out to Ranelagh; when he came back to Half-Moon Street, he found that his stuff was gone. He said goodbye to Tom and walked up the road and around the corner into Curzon Street. His house looked as neat as a pin; his belongings were unpacked; and François was pleased. It felt like they had been living in the house for months; there was no mess, no hassle, none of the usual slow settling in. François, Jacques, and Marie-Guillaume had all found their spots in just an hour. Philip felt inspired to tell François that he was a gem.
That evening he went to a ball given by the Duchess of Queensberry. And there he met Cleone, for the first time since his return to England.
That evening he attended a ball hosted by the Duchess of Queensberry. It was there that he met Cleone for the first time since returning to England.
The Duchess welcomed him effusively, for already Philip was a persona grata in Society, and much sought after by hostesses. Tom had lost no time in introducing him to the Fashionable World. The ladies were captivated by his French air, and ogled him shamelessly. Then men found that he was, for all his graces, singularly modest and unaffected at heart, and they extended the hand of friendship towards him. People began to look for him, and to be disappointed if he were absent.
The Duchess greeted him warmly, as Philip was already a welcomed figure in Society and highly sought after by hostesses. Tom wasted no time introducing him to the elite. The ladies were charmed by his French flair and openly admired him. The men discovered that, despite his charms, he was surprisingly humble and down-to-earth, and they reached out to befriend him. People started to look for him and felt let down if he wasn’t around.
Until now, however, Philip had seen nothing of Cleone, but on all sides he had heard of her. She was, he learned, London's newest beauty.
Until now, though, Philip hadn't seen Cleone at all, but he had heard about her from everywhere. He found out that she was London's latest beauty.
She was dancing when Philip saw her first, smiling up at her partner with blue eyes that seemed bluer than ever, and lips that lay in a happy curve. Her golden hair was unpowdered and piled in curls upon the top of her head. Philip thought she was more beautiful than ever.
She was dancing when Philip first noticed her, smiling up at her partner with eyes that looked brighter than ever and lips in a happy curve. Her golden hair was natural and piled in curls on top of her head. Philip thought she was more beautiful than ever.
He stood apart, watching her. She had not seen him; she was not even thinking of him; those eyes were clear and joyous. Who was her partner? Brainless-looking fool! Simpering ninny! Ay, that was all she cared for! Philip's hand clenched slowly on his snuff-box.
He stood off to the side, watching her. She hadn’t noticed him; she wasn’t even thinking about him; her eyes were bright and happy. Who was her partner? That clueless idiot! Silly fool! Ugh, that was all she cared about! Philip’s hand slowly tightened around his snuffbox.
"Aha, Jettan! You have espied the lovely Cleone?"
"Aha, Jettan! Have you spotted the beautiful Cleone?"
Philip turned. Lord Charles Fairfax stood at his elbow.
Philip turned. Lord Charles Fairfax was standing right next to him.
"Yes," he said.
"Yeah," he said.
"But how stern and forbidding!" exclaimed Fairfax. "What ails you?"
"But how strict and intimidating!" exclaimed Fairfax. "What's wrong with you?"
Philip's mouth lost its hard line.
Philip's expression softened.
"I am struck dumb," he answered gaily. "Can you wonder at it?"
"I’m speechless," he replied cheerfully. "Can you blame me?"
"So are we all. She is very beautiful, is she not?"
"So are we all. She's really beautiful, isn't she?"
"Ravishing!" agreed Philip. He saw Cleone's partner lead her to a chair. "Will you present me?"
"Stunning!" Philip agreed. He watched Cleone's partner lead her to a chair. "Can you introduce me?"
"What! And destroy my own chances? We have heard of your killing ways with the fair sex!"
"What! And ruin my own chances? We've heard about how you treat women!"
"I protest I have been maligned!" cried Philip. "I do implore your mercy! Present me!"
"I swear I've been wronged!" shouted Philip. "Please, I'm begging you! Let me speak!"
"Against my will, then!" said his lordship roguishly. He walked forward to where Cleone sat.
"Not if I have anything to say about it!" his lordship said playfully. He stepped over to where Cleone was sitting.
"Mistress Cleone, have you no smile for the humblest of your admirers?"
"Mistress Cleone, don't you have a smile for the most devoted of your fans?"
Cleone turned her head.
Cleone turned her head.
"Oh, Lord Charles! Give you good even, sir! Do you know you have not been near me the whole evening? I am monstrous hurt, I assure you!"
"Oh, Lord Charles! Good evening, sir! Did you know you haven't been near me all evening? I'm really hurt, I promise you!"
"Dear lady, how was I to come near you?" protested Fairfax. "Until this moment you have been surrounded."
"Dear lady, how was I supposed to get close to you?" protested Fairfax. "Until this moment, you've been surrounded."
Cleone gave a happy little laugh.
Cleone let out a cheerful laugh.
"I am sure 'tis untrue, sir! You delight in teasing me!" Her eyes wandered past him to Philip.
"I’m sure that’s not true, sir! You love to tease me!" Her eyes drifted past him to Philip.
Fairfax drew him forward.
Fairfax pulled him closer.
"Mistress Cleone, may I present one who is newly come from Paris, and is, he swears, struck dumb by your beauty? Mr. Jettan, of whom we all know some naughty tales!"
"Mistress Cleone, may I introduce someone who has just arrived from Paris and claims to be speechless by your beauty? Mr. Jettan, about whom we all know some scandalous stories!"
The colour drained from Cleone's cheeks. She felt faint all at once, and her fingers gripped together over her fan. For one moment she thought she must be mistaken. This was not Philip, this foppish gentleman who stood bowing so profoundly! Heavens, he was speaking! It was Philip! How could she mistake that square chin?
The color drained from Cleone's cheeks. She felt faint all of a sudden, and her fingers clutched her fan tightly. For a moment, she thought she must be wrong. This wasn’t Philip, this overly formal guy bowing so deeply! Oh my, he was talking! It was Philip! How could she confuse that square jaw?
"Mademoiselle, this is a scarce-hoped-for honour," he said. "I have watched and I have hungered. Lord Charles took pity on me, for which I shall never cease to thank him."
"Mademoiselle, this is a rare honor I've been hoping for," he said. "I've been waiting and longing for this. Lord Charles showed me kindness, for which I will always be grateful."
Cleone tried to answer, and failed. Dazedly she stared at him, from the powdered curls of his wig to the diamond buckles on his shoes. Philip! Philip! Philip in stiff silks and laces! Philip patched and painted! Philip with jewels scattered about his person, and polished nails! Was she dreaming? This foppish gentleman her blunt Philip? It was incredible, impossible! What was he saying now?
Cleone tried to respond but couldn't. She stared at him in disbelief, from the powdered curls of his wig to the diamond buckles on his shoes. Philip! Philip! Philip in stiff silks and laces! Philip all dolled up and painted! Philip covered in jewels with polished nails! Was she dreaming? This flashy guy was her straightforward Philip? It was unbelievable, impossible! What was he saying now?
"I little thought to find you here, mademoiselle! You are with Madame Charteris, no doubt?"
"I didn't expect to see you here, miss! You're with Madame Charteris, right?"
Cleone collected her scattered wits. An awful numbness was stealing over her.
Cleone gathered her scattered thoughts. A terrible numbness was washing over her.
"No, I—I am with my aunt, Lady Malmerstoke," she answered.
"No, I—I’m with my aunt, Lady Malmerstoke," she replied.
"Lady Malmerstoke?..." Philip raised his quizzing-glass with one delicate white hand, and through it scanned the room. "Ah yes, the lady in the apple-green toilette! I remember her well, that lady."
"Lady Malmerstoke?..." Philip lifted his quizzing-glass with one delicate white hand and looked around the room through it. "Oh yes, the lady in the apple-green dress! I remember her well."
"Oh—do you—do you know her?" asked Cleone. She could not drag her eyes from his face.
"Oh—do you—do you know her?" Cleone asked. She couldn't take her eyes off his face.
"I had the felicity of meeting her some nights ago. I forget where."
"I had the pleasure of meeting her a few nights ago. I can't remember where."
"R—really?" Cleone decided that this was a nightmare.
"R—really?" Cleone thought this was a nightmare.
Philip sat down beside her.
Philip sat next to her.
"You have been long in town, mademoiselle? You find all this very fatiguing, no doubt?" He waved a languid hand.
"You've been in town for a while, miss? You must find all this quite exhausting, right?" He waved a tired hand.
Indignation was dispersing the numbness. How dared Philip drawl at her like this? How dared he behave as though they were strangers?
Indignation was breaking through the numbness. How could Philip talk to her like this? How could he act as if they didn’t know each other?
"I have been in London nigh on a month. I do not find it fatiguing at all. I enjoy it."
"I have been in London for almost a month. I don't find it tiring at all. I enjoy it."
Slowly the straight brows rose.
Slowly, the straight brows lifted.
"But how refreshing!" said Philip. "When everyone is ennuyé à l'agonie, how delightful to meet one who frankly enjoys." He looked at her admiringly. "And enjoyment becomes you better than boredom becomes other women."
"But how refreshing!" said Philip. "When everyone is ennuyé à l'agonie, how delightful to meet someone who genuinely enjoys life." He looked at her admiringly. "And enjoyment suits you better than boredom suits other women."
Cleone felt that she was drifting further and further into the nightmare.
Cleone felt like she was sinking deeper and deeper into the nightmare.
"I am happy to find favour in your eyes, sir. When did you return from Paris?"
"I’m glad to have your approval, sir. When did you get back from Paris?"
"A fortnight since. In a fog which chilled me to the marrow. Almost I fled back to France. But now"—he bowed gracefully—"I thank a kindly Fate which forbade me to retreat thus precipitately."
"A couple of weeks ago. In a fog that chilled me to the bone. I almost fled back to France. But now"—he bowed gracefully—"I thank a kind Fate that didn’t let me retreat so hastily."
"Indeed?" said Cleone tartly. "How do you find Sir Maurice?"
"Really?" Cleone replied sharply. "What do you think of Sir Maurice?"
"As yet I have not found him," replied Philip. There was a laugh at the back of his eyes. How dared he laugh at her? "I have written to beg him to honour my house with his presence."
"As of now, I haven't found him," replied Philip. There was a glimmer of laughter in his eyes. How could he laugh at her? "I've written to ask him to grace my home with his presence."
"You do not propose to go to him?" Cleone's voice trembled.
"You’re not planning to go to him?" Cleone's voice shook.
Philip started.
Philip began.
"Mademoiselle speaks en plaisantant? The country in this weather?" He shuddered.
"Mademoiselle is joking? The country with this weather?" He shuddered.
"I see," said Cleone, and thought that she spoke the truth. Her foot tapped the ground angrily. Philip eyed it through his glass.
"I see," said Cleone, and she believed she was telling the truth. Her foot tapped the ground angrily. Philip watched it through his glass.
"That little foot ..." he said softly. It was withdrawn. "Ah, cruel! It inspired me with—I think—a madrigal. Cased in silver satin.... Ah!"
"That little foot..." he said softly. It was reclusive. "Ah, cruel! It inspired me with—I think—a song. Wrapped in silver satin... Ah!"
"It pleases you to make merry of my foot, sir?"
"Are you enjoying making fun of my foot, sir?"
"Jamais de ma vie!" Philip threw out his hands. "It is neither food for merriment nor sighs. It is food for pure joy. My eye, chère mademoiselle, is susceptible to beauty, be it beauty of face, or beauty of foot; the eye whispers to the brain, and a madrigal blossoms. I dare swear you have listened to an hundred such? Everywhere I have heard tell of your conquests until I am nigh dead with jealousy."
"Never in my life!" Philip threw up his hands. "It’s not something to laugh about or to sigh over. It’s something that brings pure joy. My eye, dear miss, is drawn to beauty, whether it’s beauty of face or beauty of foot; the eye speaks to the brain, and a song comes to life. I bet you’ve heard a hundred like it? I've heard so much about your achievements that I’m almost dying of jealousy."
"How very absurd!" tittered Cleone.
"How absurd!" tittered Cleone.
"Absurd? Ah, if I could think that!"
"Absurd? Oh, if only I could believe that!"
"I do not understand you, sir!"
"I don't get you, sir!"
"I can only beg that I, too, may worship at those little feet."
"I can only ask to worship at those little feet as well."
"Mr. Jettan, I can only beg that you will cease to make yourself ridiculous."
"Mr. Jettan, I can only ask you to stop making a fool of yourself."
"If it is ridiculous to adore, then must I refuse to obey you, fairest. For the sake of one smile, all would I do, save that which is without my power."
"If it's absurd to worship, then I must decline to obey you, most beautiful. For the sake of just one smile, I would do anything, except for what is beyond my control."
Cleone's eyes glittered.
Cleone's eyes sparkled.
"You have become very adept at flattery, sir."
"You've become really good at flattery, sir."
"But no! Flattery shall never be among my accomplishments, even were it necessary, which here"—he smiled ardently—"it most assuredly is not."
"But no! Flattery will never be one of my skills, even if it were needed, which here"—he smiled passionately—"it definitely is not."
"You surprise me, sir! I thought Paris to be the home of flattery."
"You surprise me, sir! I thought Paris was the place for flattery."
"On l'a diffamée. Paris teaches appreciation."
"She was defamed. Paris teaches appreciation."
"La!" Cleone, too, could be affected. "You go too deep for me, Mr. Jettan! I fear I am no match for your wit. I am but newly come from the country." The words bit.
"La!" Cleone said, feeling the impact. "You go too deep for me, Mr. Jettan! I’m afraid I'm no match for your cleverness. I just arrived from the countryside." The words stung.
"It is almost inconceivable," he said, studying her with the air of a connoisseur.
"It’s almost unbelievable," he said, examining her like a collector.
"Almost as inconceivable as the fact that little more than six months ago you despised all this!" She made a gesture with her fan towards his shimmering coat.
"Almost as unbelievable as the fact that just over six months ago you hated all of this!" She gestured with her fan towards his shiny coat.
"Was it only six months? It seems to belong to another life. You remember so well, mademoiselle."
"Was it really just six months? It feels like it belongs to a different life. You remember it so clearly, miss."
"I?" Cleone saw her mistake, and made haste to cover it. "No, sir. It is dear Sir Maurice who remembers." Her eyes sought his face for some change of expression. But not an eyelash flickered; Mr. Jettan was still smiling.
"I?" Cleone realized her mistake and quickly tried to fix it. "No, sir. It's dear Sir Maurice who remembers." She looked at his face for any sign of a reaction. But not a single eyelash moved; Mr. Jettan was still smiling.
"Now I am desolated!" he sighed. "Mademoiselle Cleone does not remember the manner of my going? But I see that it is so. She is blessed with forgetfulness."
"Now I'm heartbroken!" he sighed. "Does Mademoiselle Cleone not remember how I left? But I can see that's the case. She's fortunate to have such a short memory."
Cleone's heart leaped. Was there a note of pique, of hurt, in the smooth voice?
Cleone's heart raced. Was there a hint of irritation, of hurt, in the smooth voice?
"My memory is not of the longest either, mademoiselle, but I am sure that I am indebted to you."
"My memory isn't the best, miss, but I know I'm grateful to you."
"Really? I think you must be mistaken, sir."
"Really? I think you might be mistaken, sir."
"It is possible," he bowed. "Yet I seem to recollect that 'twas you who bade me go—to learn to be a gentleman."
"It is possible," he said, bowing. "But I remember that it was you who told me to go—to learn to be a gentleman."
Cleone laughed carelessly.
Cleone laughed casually.
"Did I?—It is so long ago, I have forgotten. And—and here is Mr. Winton come to claim me!"
"Did I?—It's been so long, I've forgotten. And—and here comes Mr. Winton to take me!"
Philip glanced round quickly. Young James Winton was threading his way towards them. Philip sprang up.
Philip looked around quickly. Young James Winton was making his way toward them. Philip jumped up.
"James!" He held out his hands to the puzzled youth. "You have forgotten, James? And it is, so Mademoiselle tells me, but six months since I saw you every day."
"James!" He stretched out his hands to the confused young man. "You forgot, James? And it’s, as Mademoiselle tells me, only six months since I saw you every day."
Winton stared. Then suddenly he grasped Philip's jewelled hand.
Winton stared. Then suddenly he grabbed Philip's jeweled hand.
"Jettan—Philip! Merciful heavens, man, is it indeed you?"
"Jettan—Philip! Oh my gosh, is that really you?"
"He is quite transformed, is he not?" said Cleone lightly. A little barb was piercing her heart that Philip should show such pleasure at seeing James, and merely bored affectation with her.
"He is definitely changed, isn't he?" Cleone said casually. A small sting was hitting her heart that Philip seemed so happy to see James and was just pretending to be interested in her.
Philip's gay laugh rang out.
Philip's cheerful laugh rang out.
"I shall write a sonnet in melancholy vein," he promised. "A sonnet to "Friends Who Knew Me Not." It will be a chef-d'œuvre, and I shall send it you tied with a sprig of myrtle."
"I'll write a sonnet with a sad tone," he promised. "A sonnet to 'Friends Who Didn’t Know Me.' It will be a masterpiece, and I'll send it to you tied with a sprig of myrtle."
Winton stepped back the better to observe him.
Winton stepped back to get a better look at him.
"Thunder and turf, tis marvellous! What's this about a sonnet? Don't tell me ye have turned poet!"
"Thunder and turf, it's amazing! What's this about a sonnet? Don't tell me you've become a poet!"
"In Paris they do not love my verses," mourned Philip. "They would say, 'No, le petit Philippe se trompe.' But you shall see! Where are you staying?"
"In Paris, they don't appreciate my poetry," Philip lamented. "They would say, 'No, le petit Philippe se trompe.' But you’ll see! Where are you staying?"
"With Darchit—in Jermyn Street. I came to London in my lady's train." He bowed to Cleone.
"With Darchit—on Jermyn Street. I arrived in London with my lady." He bowed to Cleone.
Philip's eyes narrowed.
Philip squinted.
"Aha! James, you will come to a card-party that I am giving to-morrow? I am at 14 Curzon Street."
"Aha! James, are you coming to the card party I'm hosting tomorrow? I'm at 14 Curzon Street."
"Thank you very much, I shall be delighted. Have you set up a house of your own?"
"Thank you so much, I would love that. Have you gotten your own place?"
"Sir Humphrey Grandcourt has hired his house to me for a month or so. My ménage will amuse you. I am ruled by my valet, the redoubtable François."
"Sir Humphrey Grandcourt has rented his house to me for about a month. My ménage will entertain you. I'm under the control of my formidable valet, François."
"A French valet!"
"A French personal assistant!"
"But yes! He would allow no English servant to insult me with his boorishness, so I have his cousin for chef." He threw a laughing glance at Cleone. "You would smile, Mademoiselle, could you but hear his so fierce denunciation of the English race."
"But yes! He wouldn't let any English servant treat me poorly with their rudeness, so I have his cousin as my chef." He shot a playful look at Cleone. "You would laugh, Mademoiselle, if you could hear his fierce criticism of the English."
Cleone forced a laugh.
Cleone laughed awkwardly.
"I suppose he does not regard you as English, Mr. Jettan?"
"I guess he doesn't see you as English, Mr. Jettan?"
"If I suggest such a thing he accuses me of mocking him. Ah, there is Miss Florence who beckons me! Mademoiselle will excuse me?" He bowed with a great flourish. "I shall hope to be allowed to wait on madame, your aunt. James, do not forget! To-morrow at 14 Curzon Street!" He swept round on his heel and went quickly to where Mistress Florence Farmer was seated. Cleone watched him kiss the lady's plump hand, and saw the ogling glances that Florence sent him. Desperately she sought to swallow the lump in her throat. She started to flirt with the adoring James. Out of the corner of his eye Philip watched her.
"If I suggest something like that, he accuses me of making fun of him. Ah, there’s Miss Florence calling me! Mademoiselle, will you excuse me?" He bowed dramatically. "I hope I’ll be allowed to see your aunt, madame. James, don’t forget! Tomorrow at 14 Curzon Street!" He turned on his heel and hurried over to where Mistress Florence Farmer was sitting. Cleone noticed him kiss the lady's chubby hand and saw the flirtatious looks that Florence threw his way. Desperately, she tried to swallow the knot in her throat. She began to flirt with the admiring James. Philip watched her out of the corner of his eye.
Scalding tears dropped on to Cleone's pillow that night. Philip had returned, indifferent, blasé, even scornful! Philip who had once loved her so dearly, Philip who had once been so strong and masterful, was now a dainty, affected Court gallant. Why, why had she sent him away? And, oh, how dared he treat her with that mocking admiration? Suddenly Cleone sat up.
Scalding tears fell onto Cleone's pillow that night. Philip had come back, indifferent, blasé, even scornful! Philip, who had once loved her so deeply, Philip, who had once been so strong and commanding, was now a delicate, pretentious Court dandy. Why, why had she sent him away? And, oh, how could he treat her with that mocking admiration? Suddenly, Cleone sat up.
"I hate him!" she told the bed-post. "I hate him, and hate him, and hate him."
"I can't stand him!" she said to the bedpost. "I can't stand him, and I can't stand him, and I can't stand him."
Philip was smiling when François disrobed him, a smile that held much of tenderness.
Philip was smiling when François undressed him, a smile that revealed a lot of tenderness.
"Cela marche," decided François. "I go to have a mistress."
"It works," François decided. "I'm going to have a mistress."
ThirteenThirteen
Sir Maurice Comes to TownSir Maurice Arrives in Town
A tall gentleman rang the bell of Mr. Thomas Jettan's house with some vigour. The door was presently opened by the depressed Moggat.
A tall man rang the bell at Mr. Thomas Jettan's house with some enthusiasm. The door was quickly opened by the gloomy Moggat.
"Where's your master, Moggat?" demanded the visitor abruptly.
"Where's your boss, Moggat?" the visitor asked suddenly.
Moggat held the door wide.
Moggat opened the door wide.
"In the library, sir. Will you step inside?"
"In the library, sir. Will you come in?"
Sir Maurice swept in. He gave his cloak and hat to Moggat and walked to the library door. Moggat watched him somewhat fearfully. It was not often that Sir Maurice showed signs of perturbation.
Sir Maurice entered with a flourish. He handed his cloak and hat to Moggat and approached the library door. Moggat observed him with a bit of trepidation. It wasn't common for Sir Maurice to display any signs of unease.
"By the way—" Sir Maurice paused, looking back. "My baggage follows me."
"By the way—" Sir Maurice paused, glancing back. "My luggage is coming with me."
"Very good, sir."
"Great job, sir."
Sir Maurice opened the door and disappeared.
Sir Maurice opened the door and walked out.
Thomas was seated at his desk, but at the sound of the opening door he turned.
Thomas was sitting at his desk, but when he heard the door open, he turned around.
"Why, Maurry!" He sprang up. "Gad, this is a surprise! How are ye, lad?" He wrung his brother's hand.
"Wow, Maurry!" He jumped up. "Wow, this is a surprise! How are you, man?" He shook his brother's hand.
Sir Maurice flung a sheet of paper on to the table.
Sir Maurice tossed a piece of paper onto the table.
"What the devil's the meaning of that?" he demanded.
"What on earth does that mean?" he asked.
"Why the heat?" asked the surprised Thomas.
"Why is it so hot?" asked the surprised Thomas.
"Read that—that impertinence!" ordered Sir Maurice.
"Read that—what cheek!" ordered Sir Maurice.
Tom picked up the paper and spread it open. At sight of the writing he smiled.
Tom grabbed the paper and unfolded it. When he saw the writing, he smiled.
"Oh, Philip!" he remarked.
"Oh, Philip!" he said.
"Philip? Philip write me that letter? It's no more Philip than—than a cock-robin!"
"Philip? Did Philip write me that letter? It's no more Philip than—than a cock robin!"
Tom sat down.
Tom took a seat.
"Oh, yes it is!" he said. "I recognise his hand. Now don't tramp up and down like that, Maurry! Sit down!" He glanced down the sheet and smothered a laugh.
"Oh, yes it is!" he said. "I recognize his handwriting. Now stop pacing like that, Maurry! Sit down!" He looked at the paper and stifled a laugh.
"'My very dear Papa,'" he read aloud. "'I do trust that you are enjoying your Customary Good Health and that these fogs and bitter winds have not permeated so far as to Little Fittledean. As you will observe by the above written address, I have returned to this most barbarous land. For how long I shall allow myself to be persuaded to remain I cannot tell you, but after the affinity of Paris and the charm of the Parisians, London is quite insupportable. But for the present I remain, malgré tout. You will forgive me, I know, that I do not come to visit you at the Pride. The mere thought of the country at this season fills me with incalculable dismay. So I suggest, dear Father, that you honour me by enlivening with your presence this house that I have acquired from Sir Humphrey Grandcourt. Some small entertainment I can promise you, and my friends assure me that the culinary efforts of my chef are beyond compare. An exaggeration, believe me, which one who has tasted the wonders of a Paris cuisine will easily descry. I have to convey to you the compliments of M. de Château-Banvau and others. I would write more but that I am in labour with an ode. Believe me, Dear Father, thy most devoted, humble, and obedient son,—PHILIPPE.'" Tom folded the paper. "Very proper," he remarked. "What's amiss?"
"'My very dear Papa,'" he read aloud. "'I hope you’re enjoying your usual good health and that these fogs and bitter winds haven’t made it all the way to Little Fittledean. As you can see from the address above, I’m back in this uncivilized land. I can’t tell you how long I’ll let myself be convinced to stay, but after the allure of Paris and the charm of Parisians, London is completely unbearable. However, for now, I remain, malgré tout. You’ll forgive me, I know, for not visiting you at the Pride. Just the thought of the countryside at this time of year fills me with overwhelming dread. So I suggest, dear Father, that you honor me by brightening this house I’ve taken from Sir Humphrey Grandcourt with your presence. I can promise you some small entertainment, and my friends assure me that the culinary skills of my chef are unmatched. An exaggeration, I assure you, which anyone who has experienced the delights of a Paris cuisine will easily recognize. I must also extend the compliments of M. de Château-Banvau and others. I would write more, but I’m preoccupied with crafting an ode. Believe me, dear Father, your most devoted, humble, and obedient son,—PHILIP.'" Tom folded the paper. "Very proper," he remarked. "What’s wrong?"
Sir Maurice had stalked to the window. Now he turned.
Sir Maurice had walked over to the window. Now he turned around.
"What's amiss? Everything's amiss! That Philip—my son Philip!—should write me a—an impertinent letter like that! It's—it's monstrous!"
"What's wrong? Everything's wrong! That Philip—my son Philip!—would write me such a rude letter! It's—it's outrageous!"
"For God's sake, sit down, Maurry! You're as bad as Philip himself for restlessness! Now I take this as a very dutiful, filial letter."
"For goodness' sake, sit down, Maurry! You're as restless as Philip! I’m taking this as a very dutiful, loving letter."
"Dutiful be damned!" snorted Sir Maurice. "Has the boy no other feelings than he shows in that letter? Why did he not come down to see me?"
"Dutiful be damned!" snorted Sir Maurice. "Does the boy have no other feelings than what he expresses in that letter? Why didn't he come down to see me?"
Tom re-opened the letter.
Tom opened the letter again.
"The mere thought of the country at this season appalled him. What's wrong with that? You have said the same."
"The very idea of the countryside at this time of year freaked him out. What's wrong with that? You've felt the same way."
"I? I? What matters it what I should have said? I thought Philip cared for me! He trusts I will enliven his house with my presence! I'm more like to break my stick across his back!"
"I? I? What does it matter what I should have said? I thought Philip cared about me! He believes I will brighten up his home with my presence! I'm more likely to break my stick over his back!"
"Not a whit," said Tom, cheerfully. "You sent Philip away to acquire polish, and I don't know what besides. He has obeyed you. Is it likely that, being what he now is, he'll fly back to the country? What's the matter with you, Maurice? Are you grumbling because he has obeyed your behests?"
"Not at all," Tom said cheerfully. "You sent Philip away to get some refinement and who knows what else. He’s listened to you. Do you really think that now that he’s changed, he’ll just come back to the country? What's wrong with you, Maurice? Are you upset because he did what you asked?"
Sir Maurice sank on to the couch.
Sir Maurice sank onto the couch.
"If you but knew how I have missed him and longed for him," he began, and checked himself. "I am well served," he said bitterly. "I should have been content to have him as he was."
"If you only knew how much I’ve missed him and wanted him," he started, then stopped himself. "I deserve this," he said bitterly. "I should have been satisfied just having him as he was."
"So I thought at the time, but I've changed my opinion."
"So I thought back then, but I've changed my mind."
"I cannot bear to think of Philip as being callous, flippant, and—a mere fop!"
"I can't stand to imagine Philip as being heartless, superficial, and—a total dandy!"
"'Twould be your own fault if he were," said Tom severely. "But he's not. Something inside him has blossomed forth. Philip is now pure joy."
"It would be your own fault if he were," Tom said sternly. "But he isn't. Something inside him has blossomed. Philip is now pure joy."
Sir Maurice grunted.
Sir Maurice grunted.
"It's true, lad. That letter—oh, ay! He's a young rascal, but 'twas to avenge his injured feelings, I take it. He was devilish hurt when you and Cleone sent him away betwixt you. He's still hurt that you should have done it. I can't fathom the workings of his mind, but he assures me they are very complex. He is glad that you sent him, but he wants you to be sorry. Or rather, Cleone. The lad is very forgiving to you"—Tom laughed—"but that letter is a piece of devilry—he has plenty of it, I warn you! He hoped you'd be as angry as you are and wish your work undone. There's no lack of affection."
"It's true, kid. That letter—oh, yeah! He's a young troublemaker, but I guess he did it to get back at his hurt feelings. He was really upset when you and Cleone sent him away together. He's still upset that you did that. I can't understand how he thinks, but he tells me it's really complicated. He’s glad you sent him away, but he wants you to feel bad about it. Or more like, he wants Cleone to feel bad. The kid is pretty forgiving towards you"—Tom laughed—"but that letter is pure mischief—he's got a lot of it, trust me! He was hoping you'd be as angry as you are and want to take back what you did. There's no shortage of affection."
Sir Maurice looked up.
Sir Maurice glanced up.
"He's—the same Philip?"
"Is he the same Philip?"
"Never think it! In a way he's the same, but there's more of him—ay, and a score of affectations. In about ten minutes"—he glanced at the clock—"he'll be here. So you'll see for yourself."
"Don't even think that! In some ways, he's the same, but there's more to him—oh, and a bunch of pretentious things. In about ten minutes"—he looked at the clock—"he'll be here. So you'll see for yourself."
Sir Maurice straightened himself. He sighed.
Sir Maurice straightened up. He sighed.
"An old fool, eh, Tom? But it cut me to the quick, that letter."
"An old fool, right, Tom? But that letter really hurt."
"Of course it did, the young devil! Oh, Maurry, Maurry, ye never saw the like of our Philip!"
"Of course it did, the young devil! Oh, Maurry, Maurry, you’ve never seen anyone like our Philip!"
"Is he so remarkable? I heard about that absurd duel, as I told you. There'll be a reckoning between him and Cleone."
"Is he really that impressive? I heard about that ridiculous duel, as I mentioned to you. There will be a showdown between him and Cleone."
"Ay. That's what I don't understand. The pair of them are playing a queer game. Old Sally Malmerstoke told me that Cleone vows she hates Philip. The chit is flirting outrageously with every man who comes—always under Philip's nose. And Philip laughs. Yet I'll swear he means to have her. I don't interfere. They must work out their own quarrel."
"Ay. That's what I don't get. They’re playing a strange game. Old Sally Malmerstoke told me that Cleone claims she hates Philip. The girl is flirting ridiculously with every guy who shows up—always right in front of Philip. And Philip just laughs. But I’ll bet he’s determined to have her. I don’t get involved. They need to sort out their own issues."
"Clo doesn't hate Philip," said Sir Maurice. "She was pining for him until that fool Bancroft read us Satterthwaite's letter. Was it true that Philip fought over some French hussy?"
"Clo doesn't hate Philip," Sir Maurice said. "She was longing for him until that idiot Bancroft read us Satterthwaite's letter. Is it true that Philip got into a fight over some French girl?"
"No, over Clo herself. But he says naught, and if the truth were told, I believe it's because he has had affaires in Paris, even if that was not one. He's too dangerously popular."
"No, it’s about Clo herself. But he says nothing, and if I'm being honest, I think it’s because he's had affaires in Paris, even if that one wasn't one of them. He's just too dangerously popular."
"So it seemed from Satterthwaite's account. Is he so popular? I cannot understand it."
"So it sounded from Satterthwaite's account. Is he really that popular? I just don't get it."
"He's novel, y'see. I'd a letter from Château-Banvau the other day, mourning the loss of ce cher petit Philippe, and demanding whether he had found his heart or no!"
"He's quite the character, you know. I got a letter from Château-Banvau the other day, expressing grief over the loss of ce cher petit Philippe, and asking whether he had found his heart or not!"
Sir Maurice drove his cane downwards.
Sir Maurice struck the ground with his cane.
"By Gad, if Philip's so great a success, it's—it's more than ever I expected," he ended lamely.
"Wow, if Philip's such a big success, it's—it's more than I ever expected," he finished awkwardly.
"Wait till you see him!" smiled Thomas. "The boy's for all the world like a bit o' quicksilver. He splutters out French almost every time he opens his mouth, and—here he is!"
"Wait until you see him!" smiled Thomas. "The boy's just like a little bit of quicksilver. He spills out French almost every time he talks, and—here he is!"
A door banged loudly outside, and a clear, crisp voice floated into the library from the hall.
A door slammed hard outside, and a clear, sharp voice drifted into the library from the hallway.
"Mordieu, what a climate! Moggat, you rogue, am I not depressed enough without your glum face to make me more so? Smile, vieux crétin, for the love of God!"
"Mordieu, what a terrible climate! Moggat, you scoundrel, am I not miserable enough without your gloomy face making it worse? Smile, old fool, for the love of God!"
"Were I to call Moggat one-half of the names Philip bestows on him, he'd leave me," remarked Tom. "With him, Philip can do no wrong. Now what's to do?"
"Were I to call Moggat one-half of the names Philip gives him, he'd leave me," Tom said. "With him, Philip can do no wrong. So what should we do now?"
"Doucement, malheureux! Gently, I say! Do you wish to pull my arms off with the coat? Ah, voilà! Spread it to dry, Moggat, and take care not to crease it. Yes, that is well!"
"Gently, my friend! I’m saying it softly! Are you trying to tear my arms off with the coat? Ah, there you go! Spread it out to dry, Moggat, and be careful not to wrinkle it. Yes, that looks good!"
Then came Moggat's voice, very self-conscious.
Then Moggat's voice came through, sounding really self-aware.
"C'est comme moosoo désire?"
"Is it like moosoo desires?"
There was a sound of hand-clapping, and an amused laugh.
There was the sound of applause and a cheerful laugh.
"Voyons, c'est fameux! Quite the French scholar, eh, Moggat? Where's my uncle? In the library?"
"Well, that's impressive! Quite the French scholar, huh, Moggat? Where's my uncle? In the library?"
Came a quick step across the hall. Philip swirled into the room.
Came a quick step across the hall. Philip swirled into the room.
"Much have I borne in silence, Tom, but this rain—" He broke off. The next moment he was on one knee before his father, Sir Maurice's thin hands pressed to his lips. "Father!"
" I've kept so much inside, Tom, but this rain—" He stopped. A moment later, he was on one knee in front of his father, Sir Maurice's thin hands pressed to his lips. "Dad!"
Tom coughed and walked to the window.
Tom coughed and went to the window.
Sir Maurice drew his hands away. He took Philip's chin in his long fingers and forced his head up. Silently he scrutinised his son's face. Then he smiled.
Sir Maurice pulled his hands back. He grabbed Philip's chin with his long fingers and lifted his head. Silently, he examined his son's face. Then he smiled.
"You patched and painted puppy-dog," he mimicked softly.
"You patched and painted puppy-dog," he imitated softly.
Philip laughed. His hands found Sir Maurice's again and gripped hard.
Philip laughed. He grabbed Sir Maurice's hands again and squeezed tightly.
"Alack, too true! Father, you're looking older."
"Wow, it's true! Dad, you look older."
"Impudent young scapegrace! What would you? I have but one son."
"Rude young troublemaker! What do you want? I have only one son."
"And you missed him?"
"And you missed him?"
"A little," acknowledged Sir Maurice.
"A bit," acknowledged Sir Maurice.
Philip rose to his feet.
Philip stood up.
"Ah, but I am glad! And you are sorry you sent him away?"
"Ah, but I'm happy! And you're regretting that you sent him away?"
"Not now. But when I received this—very." Sir Maurice held out the sheet of paper.
"Not right now. But when I got this—absolutely." Sir Maurice held out the piece of paper.
"That! Bah!" Philip sent it whirling into the fire. "For that I apologise. If you had not been hurt—oh, heaven knows what I should have done! Where is your baggage, Father?"
"That! Ugh!" Philip threw it into the fire. "I apologize for that. If you hadn't been hurt—oh, God knows what I would have done! Where is your luggage, Dad?"
"Here by now."
"Here now."
"Here? But no, no! It must go to Curzon Street!"
"Here? No, no! It has to go to Curzon Street!"
"My dear son, I thank you very much, but an old man is better with an old man."
"My dear son, I really appreciate it, but an old man gets along better with another old man."
Tom wheeled round.
Tom turned around.
"What's that? Who are you calling an old man, Maurry? I'm as young as ever I was!"
"What's that? Who are you calling an old man, Maurry? I'm as young as I've ever been!"
"In any case, it is to Curzon Street that you come, Father."
"In any case, it's Curzon Street you need to go to, Dad."
"As often as you wish, dear boy, but I'll stay with Tom." Then, as Philip prepared to argue the point, "No, Philip, my mind is made up. Sit down and tell me the tale of your ridiculous duel with Bancroft."
"As often as you want, dear boy, but I'm sticking with Tom." Then, as Philip got ready to debate, "No, Philip, I've made my decision. Sit down and tell me about your silly duel with Bancroft."
"Oh, that!" Philip laughed. "It was amusing, but scandalous. My sympathies were with my adversary."
"Oh, that!" Philip laughed. "It was funny, but totally outrageous. I felt for my opponent."
"And what was the ode you threatened to read?"
"And what was the poem you said you would read?"
"An ode to importunate friends, especially composed for the occasion. They took it from me—Paul and Louis—oh, and Henri de Chatelin! They do not like my verse."
"Here's a tribute to persistent friends, specially written for this occasion. They took it from me—Paul and Louis—oh, and Henri de Chatelin! They aren't fans of my poetry."
Sir Maurice lay back in his seat and laughed till the tears ran down his cheeks.
Sir Maurice leaned back in his seat and laughed until tears streamed down his cheeks.
"Gad, Philip, but I wish I'd been there! To hear you declaim an ode of your own making! Faith, is it really my blunt, brusque, impossible Philip?"
"Gosh, Philip, I really wish I had been there! To hear you recite a poem you wrote! Seriously, is it really my straightforward, tough, impossible Philip?"
"Not at all! It is your elegant, smooth, and wholly possible Philip!"
"Not at all! It’s your stylish, smooth, and completely possible Philip!"
Sir Maurice sat up again.
Sir Maurice sat up once more.
"Ah! And does this Philip contemplate marriage?"
"Ah! Is this Philip thinking about marriage?"
"That," said his son, "is on the knees of the gods."
"That," said his son, "is in the hands of the gods."
"I see. Is it woe unto him who seeks to interfere?"
"I see. Is it a tragedy for anyone who tries to interfere?"
"Parfaitement!" bowed Philip. "I play now—a little game."
"Perfectly!" Philip bowed. "I'm going to play a little game now."
"And Cleone?"
"And Cleone?"
"Cleone ... I don't know. It is what I wish to find out. Lady Malmerstoke stands my friend."
"Cleone ... I’m not sure. That’s what I want to find out. Lady Malmerstoke is my friend."
"Trust Sally," said Tom.
"Trust Sally," Tom said.
Philip's eyes sparkled.
Philip's eyes shone.
"Ah, Tom, Tom, art a rogue! Father, he is in love with her ladyship!"
"Ah, Tom, Tom, you're such a troublemaker! Dad, he's in love with her ladyship!"
"He always has been," answered Sir Maurice. "Even before old Malmerstoke died."
"He always has been," replied Sir Maurice. "Even before old Malmerstoke died."
Tom cleared his throat.
Tom cleared his throat.
"I—"
"I—"
"Then why do you not wed her?" demanded Philip.
"Then why don’t you marry her?" asked Philip.
"She would not. Now she says—perhaps. We are very good friends," he added contentedly. "I doubt neither of us is at the age when one loves with heat."
"She won't. Now she says—maybe. We are really good friends," he added happily. "I don’t think either of us is at an age where love runs hot."
"Philip, how do you like Paris?" interrupted Sir Maurice.
"Philip, what do you think of Paris?" interrupted Sir Maurice.
"I cannot tell you, sir! My feeling for Paris and my Paris friends is beyond all words."
"I can't explain it, sir! My feelings for Paris and my friends in Paris are beyond words."
"Ay. I thought the same. But in the end one is glad to come home."
"Ay. I thought the same. But in the end, you’re glad to come home."
"May it please heaven, then, to make the end far, far away," said Philip. "When I go back, you will go with me, Father."
"Please, heaven, let the end be a long way off," said Philip. "When I go back, you'll come with me, Dad."
"Ah, I am too old for that now," answered Sir Maurice. He smiled reminiscently.
"Ah, I'm too old for that now," replied Sir Maurice. He smiled with nostalgia.
"Too old? Quelle absurdité! M. de Château-Banvau has made me swear to bring you. M. de Richelieu asked when he was to see your face again. A score—"
"Too old? What absurdity! Mr. de Château-Banvau has made me promise to bring you. Mr. de Richelieu asked when he would see your face again. A score—"
"De Richelieu? Where did you meet him, boy?"
"De Richelieu? Where did you run into him, kid?"
"At Versailles. He was very kind to me for your sake."
"At Versailles. He was really nice to me because of you."
"Ay, he would be. So you went to Versailles, then!"
"Ay, he would be. So you went to Versailles, huh!"
"Often."
Often.
"Philip, I begin to think you are somewhat of a rake. What attracted you to Versailles?"
"Philip, I'm starting to think you're a bit of a player. What drew you to Versailles?"
"Many things," parried Philip.
"Lots of things," parried Philip.
"Female things?"
"Women's stuff?"
"What curiosity! Sometimes, yes, but not au sérieux."
"What a curiosity! Sometimes, yes, but not seriously."
"Little Philip without a heart, eh?"
"Little Philip without a heart, huh?"
"Who told you that?" Philip leaned forward.
"Who told you that?" Philip leaned in.
"Satterthwaite wrote it, or something like it."
"Satterthwaite wrote it, or something similar."
"Le petit Philippe au Cœur Perdu. Most of them would give their eyes to know who the fair unknown may be!"
"Le petit Philippe au Cœur Perdu. Most of them would give anything to know who the mysterious stranger might be!"
"Is it still Cleone?" Sir Maurice looked sharply across at him.
"Is it still Cleone?" Sir Maurice shot a sharp glance at him.
"It has—never been anyone else," answered Philip simply.
"It’s never been anyone else," Philip replied simply.
"I am glad. I want you to marry her, Philip."
"I’m happy. I want you to marry her, Philip."
"Sir," said Philip superbly, "I have every intention of so doing."
"Sir," Philip said confidently, "I fully plan on doing that."
Fourteen14
The Strange Behaviour of Mistress CleoneThe Odd Behavior of Mistress Cleone
"François, there is one below who desires m'sieu."
"François, there's someone below who wants to see you."
François shook out a fine lace ruffle.
François shook out a delicate lace ruffle.
"Qui est-ce?"
"Who is it?"
"Le père de M'sieur," answered Jacques gloomily.
"The father of M'sieur," replied Jacques darkly.
François cast the ruffle aside.
François tossed the ruffle aside.
"Le père de M'sieur! I go at once." He vanished out of the door and scuttled downstairs to the library. Sir Maurice was startled by his sudden entrance, and raised his eyeglass the better to observe this very abrupt, diminutive creature.
"The father of M'sieur! I'm going right now." He disappeared through the door and hurried downstairs to the library. Sir Maurice was taken aback by his sudden arrival and lifted his eyeglass to get a better look at this very quick, small figure.
François bowed very low.
François bowed deeply.
"M'sieu, eet ees zat my mastaire 'e ees wiz hees barbier. Eef m'sieu would come up to ze chamber of my mastaire?"
"Mister, it’s that my master is with his barber. If you would come up to my master’s chamber?"
Sir Maurice smiled.
Sir Maurice grinned.
"Assurément. Vous allez marcher en tête?"
"Of course. Are you going to lead the way?"
François' face broke into a delighted smile.
François' face lit up with a joyful smile.
"Ah, m'sieur parle Français! Si m'sieur veut me suivre?"
"Oh, you speak French, sir! Would you like to follow me?"
"M'sieur veut bien," nodded Sir Maurice. He followed François upstairs to Philip's luxurious bedroom. François put forward a chair.
"Do you mind," nodded Sir Maurice. He followed François upstairs to Philip's luxurious bedroom. François offered a chair.
"M'sieur will be graciously pleased to seat himself? M'sieur Philippe will come very soon. It is the visit of the barber, you understand."
"Mister, would you kindly take a seat? Philippe will be here very soon. It's the barber's visit, you see."
"A serious matter," agreed Sir Maurice.
"A serious matter," Sir Maurice agreed.
"M'sieur understands well. Me, I am valet of M'sieur Philippe."
"Mister understands well. I am the valet of Mister Philippe."
"I had guessed it. You are François?"
"I figured it out. You’re François?"
"Yes, m'sieur. It is perhaps that M'sieur Philippe has spoken of me?" He looked anxiously at Sir Maurice.
"Yes, sir. Could it be that Mr. Philippe has mentioned me?" He looked nervously at Sir Maurice.
"Certainly he has spoken of you," smiled Sir Maurice.
"Of course, he has talked about you," smiled Sir Maurice.
"It is perhaps—that he tell you I am un petit singe?"
"It is perhaps—that he tells you I am un petit singe?"
"No, he said no such thing," answered Sir Maurice gravely. "He told me he possessed a veritable treasure for a valet."
"No, he said no such thing," Sir Maurice replied seriously. "He told me he had a real treasure for a valet."
"Ah!" François clapped his hands. "It is true, m'sieur. I am a very good valet—oh, but very good!" He skipped to the bed and picked up an embroidered satin vest. This he laid over a chair-back.
"Ah!" François clapped his hands. "It's true, sir. I'm a really great valet—oh, very much so!" He skipped to the bed and picked up an embroidered satin vest. He laid it over the back of a chair.
"The vest of M'sieur Philippe," he said reverently.
"The vest of Mister Philippe," he said with respect.
"So I see," said Sir Maurice. "What's he doing, lying abed so late?"
"So I see," said Sir Maurice. "What's he doing, lying in bed so late?"
"Ah, non, m'sieur! He does not lie abed late! Oh, but never, never. It is that the barber is here, and the tailor—imbeciles, both! They put M'sieur Philippe in a bad humour with their so terrible stupidity. He spends an hour explaining what it is that he wishes." François cast up his eyes. "And they do not understand, no! They are of so great a density! M'sieur Philippe he become much enraged, naturally."
"Oh no, sir! He doesn't stay in bed late! Never, ever. It's just that the barber is here, and the tailor—both complete fools! They put Mr. Philippe in a bad mood with their awful stupidity. He spends an hour explaining what he wants." François rolled his eyes. "And they still don't get it, no! They're so incredibly dense! Of course Mr. Philippe gets very angry."
"Monsieur Philippe is very particular, eh?"
"Monsieur Philippe is quite particular, isn't he?"
François beamed. He was opening various pots in readiness for his master.
François smiled brightly. He was getting different pots ready for his boss.
"Yes, m'sieur. M'sieur Philippe must have everything just as he likes it."
"Yes, sir. Sir Philippe needs everything exactly how he wants it."
At that moment Philip walked in, wrapped in a gorgeous silk robe, and looking thunderous. When he saw his father his brow cleared.
At that moment, Philip walked in, wrapped in a stunning silk robe and looking furious. When he saw his father, his expression softened.
"You, sir? Have you waited long?"
"You, sir? Have you been waiting long?"
"No, only ten minutes or so. Have you strangled the tailor?"
"No, just about ten minutes or so. Did you strangle the tailor?"
Philip laughed.
Philip laughed.
"De près! François, I will be alone with M'sieur."
"Come closer! François, I will be alone with Sir."
François bowed. He went out with his usual hurried gait.
François bowed. He left with his usual quick pace.
Philip sat down before his dressing-table.
Philip sat down at his dressing table.
"What do you think of the incomparable François?" he asked.
"What do you think of the amazing François?" he asked.
"He startled me at first," smiled Sir Maurice. "A droll little creature."
"At first, he caught me off guard," Sir Maurice smiled. "Such a funny little character."
"But quite inimitable. You're out early this morning, sir?"
"But truly one of a kind. You're up early this morning, sir?"
"My dear Philip, it is close on noon! I have been to see Cleone."
"My dear Philip, it’s almost noon! I just visited Cleone."
Philip picked up a nail-polisher and passed it gently across his fingers.
Philip picked up a nail file and gently ran it across his fingers.
"Ah?"
"Wait, what?"
"Philip, I am worried."
"Philip, I'm worried."
"Yes?" Philip was intent on his nails. "And why?"
"Yes?" Philip was focused on his nails. "And why?"
"I don't understand the child! I could have sworn she was dying for you to return!"
"I don't get the kid! I could have sworn she was so eager for you to come back!"
Philip glanced up quickly.
Philip looked up quickly.
"That is true?"
"Is that true?"
"I thought so. At home—yes, I am certain of it! But now she seems a changed being." He frowned, looking at his son. Philip was again occupied with his hands. "She is in excellent spirits; she tells me that she enjoys every moment of every day. She was in ecstasies! I spoke of you and she was quite indifferent. What have you done to make her so, Philip?"
"I thought so. At home—yeah, I’m sure of it! But now she seems like a different person." He frowned, glancing at his son. Philip was once again focused on his hands. "She’s in great spirits; she says she enjoys every moment of every day. She was thrilled! I mentioned you, and she didn’t seem to care at all. What did you do to make her feel this way, Philip?"
"I do not quite know. I have become what she would have had me. To test her, I aped the mincing extravagance of the typical town-gallant. She was surprised at first, and then angry. That pleased me. I thought: Cleone does not like the thing I am; she would prefer the real me. Then I waited on Lady Malmerstoke. Cleone was there. She was, as you say, quite changed. I suppose she was charming; it did not seem so to me. She laughed and flirted with her fan; she encouraged me to praise her beauty; she demanded the madrigal I had promised her. When I read it she was delighted. She asked her aunt if I were not a dreadful, flattering creature. Then came young Winton, who is, I take it, amoureux à en perdre la tête. To him she was all smiles, behaving like some Court miss. Since then she has always been the same. She is kind to every man who comes her way, and to me. You say you do not understand? Nor do I. She is not the Cleone I knew, and not the Cleone I love. She makes herself as—Clothilde de Chaucheron. Charmante, spirituelle, one to whom a man makes trifling love, but not the one a man will wed." He spoke quietly, and with none of his usual sparkle.
"I’m not really sure. I’ve become what she wanted me to be. To test her, I copied the over-the-top behavior of the typical town guy. She was surprised at first, then got angry. That made me happy. I thought: Cleone doesn’t like who I am; she would prefer the real me. Then I attended to Lady Malmerstoke. Cleone was there. She seemed, as you say, completely different. I guess she was charming; it didn’t seem that way to me. She laughed and played with her fan; she encouraged me to compliment her beauty; she insisted I recite the madrigal I promised her. When I read it, she was thrilled. She asked her aunt if I wasn’t a terrible flatterer. Then young Winton showed up, who I assume is love-struck. To him, she was all smiles, acting like some Court girl. Since then, she’s always been the same. She’s nice to every man who comes along, including me. You say you don’t understand? Neither do I. She’s not the Cleone I knew, and she’s not the Cleone I love. She presents herself like—Clothilde de Chaucheron. Charming, witty, someone a man can flirt with, but not the kind a man would marry." He spoke softly, without his usual spark.
Sir Maurice leaned forward, striking his fist on his knee.
Sir Maurice leaned forward, pounding his fist on his knee.
"But she is not that type of woman, Philip! That's what I can't understand!"
"But she's not that kind of woman, Philip! That's what I can't get!"
Philip shrugged slightly.
Philip shrugged a little.
"She is not, you say? I wonder now whether that is so. She flirted before, you remember, with Bancroft."
"She isn't, you say? I’m beginning to wonder if that’s true. She used to flirt, remember, with Bancroft."
"Ay! To tease you!"
"Hey! Just messing with you!"
"Cela se peut. This time it is not to tease me. That I know."
"That could be true. This time it's not just to tease me. I know that."
"But, Philip, if it is not for that, why does she do it?"
"But, Philip, if it's not for that, why does she do it?"
"Presumably because she so wishes. It is possible that the adulation she receives has flown to her head. It is almost as though she sought to captivate me."
"Probably because she wants to. It’s possible that all the praise she gets has gone to her head. It’s like she’s trying to win me over."
"Cleone would never do such a thing!"
"Cleone would never do something like that!"
"Well, sir, you will see. Come with us this afternoon. Tom and I are bidden to take a dish of Bohea with her ladyship."
"Well, sir, you'll see. Join us this afternoon. Tom and I have been invited to have some tea with her ladyship."
"Sally has already asked me. I shall certainly come. Mordieu, what ails the child?"
"Sally has already asked me. I will definitely come. Goodness, what's wrong with the child?"
Philip rubbed some rouge on to his cheeks.
Philip applied some blush to his cheeks.
"If you can tell me the answer to that riddle, sir, I shall—thank you."
"If you can tell me the answer to that riddle, sir, I'll—thank you."
"You do care, Philip? Still?" He watched Philip pick up the haresfoot with fingers that trembled a little.
"You still care, Philip? Really?" He watched Philip pick up the hare's foot with slightly trembling fingers.
"Care?" said Philip. "I—yes, sir. I care—greatly."
"Care?" Philip said. "I—yes, sir. I care—big time."
Lady Malmerstoke glanced critically at her niece.
Lady Malmerstoke looked at her niece with a critical eye.
"You are very gay, Clo," she remarked.
"You seem really cheerful, Clo," she said.
"Gay?" cried Cleone. "How could I be sober, Aunt Sally? I am enjoying myself so much!"
"Gay?" shouted Cleone. "How could I be sober, Aunt Sally? I'm having such a great time!"
Lady Malmerstoke pushed a bracelet farther up one plump arm.
Lady Malmerstoke pushed a bracelet higher up her soft arm.
"H'm!" she said. "It's very unfashionable, my dear, not to say bourgeois."
"Hmm!" she said. "It's really out of style, my dear, not to mention bourgeois."
"Oh, fiddle!" answered Cleone. "Who thinks that?"
"Oh, come on!" Cleone replied. "Who thinks that?"
"I really don't know. It is what one says. To be in the mode you must be fatigued to death."
"I honestly have no idea. It's just something people say. To be in the zone, you have to be completely worn out."
"Then I am not in the mode," laughed Cleone. "Don't forget, Aunt, that I am but a simple country-maid!" She swept a mock curtsey.
"Then I'm not in the mood," laughed Cleone. "Don't forget, Aunt, that I'm just a simple country girl!" She gave a playful curtsey.
"No," said her ladyship placidly. "One is not like to forget it."
"No," her ladyship said calmly. "One is unlikely to forget it."
"What do you mean?" demanded Cleone.
"What do you mean?" Cleone asked.
"Don't eat me," sighed her aunt. "'Tis your principal charm—freshness."
"Don't eat me," her aunt sighed. "It's your main charm—freshness."
"Oh!" said Cleone doubtfully.
"Oh!" Cleone said, unsure.
"Or it was," added Lady Malmerstoke, folding her hands and closing her eyes.
"Or it was," added Lady Malmerstoke, folding her hands and closing her eyes.
"Was! Aunt Sally, I insist that you tell me what it is you mean!"
"Come on! Aunt Sally, I insist that you tell me what you mean!"
"My love, you know very well what I mean."
"My love, you know exactly what I mean."
"No, I do not! I—I—Aunt Sally, wake up!"
"No, I don’t! I—I—Aunt Sally, wake up!"
Her ladyship's brown eyes opened.
Her ladyship's brown eyes opened.
"Well, my dear, if you must have it, 'tis this—you make yourself cheap by your flirtatious ways."
"Well, my dear, if you really want to know, it's this—you cheapen yourself with your flirtatious behavior."
Cleone's cheeks flamed.
Cleone's cheeks turned red.
"I—oh, I don't f—flirt! I—Auntie, how can you say so?"
"I—oh, I don't flirt! I—Auntie, how can you say that?"
"Quite easily," said her ladyship. "Else had I left it unsaid. Since this Mr. Philip Jettan has returned you have acquired all the tricks of the sex. I do not find it becoming in you, but mayhap I am wrong."
"Quite easily," said her ladyship. "Otherwise, I would have kept it to myself. Since Mr. Philip Jettan has come back, you’ve picked up all the behaviors of your gender. I don’t think it suits you, but maybe I’m mistaken."
"It has nothing to do with Ph—Mr. Jettan!"
"It has nothing to do with Ph—Mr. Jettan!"
"I beg your pardon, my dear, I thought it had. But if you wish to attract him—"
"I’m sorry, my dear, I thought it had. But if you want to catch his attention—"
"Aunt!" almost shrieked Cleone.
"Aunt!" Cleone nearly shrieked.
"I wish you would not interrupt," complained Lady Malmerstoke wearily. "I said if you wish to attract him you should employ less obvious methods."
"I wish you wouldn't interrupt," Lady Malmerstoke complained wearily. "I said that if you want to catch his attention, you should use less obvious methods."
"H—how dare you, Aunt Sally! I wish to attract him? I hate him! I hate the very sight of him!"
"H—how dare you, Aunt Sally! Do I want to attract him? I can't stand him! I can't stand the very sight of him!"
The sleepy brown eyes grew more alert.
The sleepy brown eyes became more awake.
"Is that the way the wind lies?" murmured Lady Malmerstoke. "What's he done?" she added, ever practical.
"Is that how the wind is blowing?" murmured Lady Malmerstoke. "What has he done?" she added, always practical.
"He hasn't done anything. He—I—"
"He hasn't done anything. He—I—"
"Then what hasn't he done?"
"Then what hasn't he achieved?"
"Aunt Sally—Aunt Sally—you—I won't answer! He—nothing at all! 'Tis merely that I do not like him."
"Aunt Sally—Aunt Sally—you—I won't reply! He—nothing at all! It's just that I don't like him."
"It's not apparent in your manner," remarked her ladyship. "Are you determined that he shall fall in love with you?"
"It's not obvious from how you act," her ladyship said. "Are you set on making him fall in love with you?"
"Of course I never thought of such a thing! I—why should I?"
"Of course I never thought of anything like that! I—why would I?"
"For the pleasure of seeing him at your feet, and then kicking him away. Revenge, my love, revenge."
"For the thrill of having him at your feet and then pushing him away. Revenge, my love, revenge."
"How dare you say such things, Aunt! It—it isn't true!"
"How can you say such things, Aunt! It—it’s not true!"
Lady Malmerstoke continued to pursue her own line of thought.
Lady Malmerstoke kept focusing on her own thoughts.
"From all I can see of this Philip, he's not the man to be beaten by a chit of a girl. I think he is in love with you. Have a care, my dear. Men with chins like his are not safe. I've had experience, and I know. He'll win in the end, if he has a mind to do so."
"From what I can tell about this Philip, he’s not the kind of guy who can be taken down by a young girl. I think he’s in love with you. Be careful, my dear. Men with chins like his aren’t to be underestimated. I’ve been around, and I know. He’ll come out on top in the end if he decides to."
"Mind!" Cleone was scornful. "He has no mind above clothes or poems!"
"Seriously!" Cleone sneered. "He cares about nothing but clothes or poems!"
Lady Malmerstoke eyed her lazily.
Lady Malmerstoke glanced at her lazily.
"Who told you that, Clo?"
"Who said that, Clo?"
"No one. I can see for myself."
"No one. I can see that for myself."
"There is nothing blinder than a very young woman," philosophised her ladyship. "One lives and one learns. Your Philip—"
"There’s nothing more oblivious than a young woman," her ladyship mused. "You live and you learn. Your Philip—"
"He isn't my Philip!" cried Cleone, nearly in tears.
"He's not my Philip!" Cleone exclaimed, almost in tears.
"You put me out," complained her aunt. "Your Philip is no fool. He's dangerous. On account of that chin, you understand. Don't have him, my dear; he's one of your masterful men. They are the worst; old Jeremy Fletcher was like that. Dear me, what years ago that was!"
"You shut me out," her aunt complained. "Your Philip isn't naive. He's a threat because of that chin, you know. Don’t get involved with him, dear; he’s one of those domineering types. They’re the worst; old Jeremy Fletcher was just like that. My, that was so many years ago!"
"He—he's no more masterful than—than his uncle!"
"He's no more in charge than his uncle!"
"No, thank heaven, Tom's an easy-going creature," agreed her aunt. "A pity Philip is not the same."
"No, thank goodness, Tom's a laid-back guy," her aunt agreed. "It's a shame Philip isn't the same."
"But I tell you he is! If—if he were more masterful I should like him better! I like a man to be a man and not—a—a pranked-out doll!"
"But I’m telling you he is! If—if he were more assertive, I would like him better! I like a man to be a man and not—a—a fancy doll!"
"How you have changed!" sighed her aunt. "I thought that was just what you did not want. Didn't you send your Philip away to become a beau?"
"Wow, you've really changed!" her aunt sighed. "I thought that's exactly what you didn't want. Didn't you send Philip away to become a ladies' man?"
"He is not my Philip—Aunt! I—no, of course I did—didn't. And if I d-did, it was very st-stupid of me, and now I'd rather have a—a masterful man."
"He’s not my Philip—Aunt! I—no, of course I didn’t—did I? And if I did, that was really stupid of me, and now I’d much rather have a—a strong man."
"Ay, we're all like that in our youth," nodded her aunt. "When you grow older you'll appreciate the milder sort. I nearly married Jerry Fletcher. Luckily I changed my mind and had Malmerstoke. God rest his soul, poor fellow! Now I shall have Tom, I suppose."
"Ay, we're all like that when we're young," her aunt nodded. "When you get older, you'll appreciate the gentler types. I almost married Jerry Fletcher. Thankfully, I changed my mind and went with Malmerstoke. God rest his soul, poor guy! Now I guess I'll have Tom."
Cleone broke into a hysterical laugh.
Cleone burst into a hysterical laugh.
"Aunt, you are incorrigible! How can you talk so?"
"Aunt, you can't be serious! How can you say that?"
"Dreadful, isn't it? But I was always like that. Very attractive, you know. I never was beautiful, but I made a great success. I quite shocked my poor mother. But it was all a pose, of course. It made me noticed. I was so amusing and novel—like you, my love, but in a different way. All a pose."
"Dreadful, isn't it? But I've always been like that. Very attractive, you know. I was never beautiful, but I was really successful. I totally shocked my poor mom. But it was all just an act, of course. It got me noticed. I was so entertaining and unique—like you, my love, but in a different way. All an act."
"Why, is it still a pose, Aunt?"
"Why is it still a pose, Aunt?"
"Oh, now it's a habit. So much less fatiguing, my dear. But to return to what I was saying, you—"
"Oh, now it's just a habit. It's way less exhausting, my dear. But back to what I was saying, you—"
"Don't—don't let's talk—about me," begged Cleone unsteadily. "I—hardly know what possesses me, but—Oh, there's the bell!"
"Please—let's not talk—about me," Cleone pleaded nervously. "I—barely understand what’s come over me, but—Oh, there's the bell!"
Lady Malmerstoke dragged herself up.
Lady Malmerstoke pulled herself up.
"Already? Clo, is my wig on straight? Drat the men, I've not had a wink of sleep the whole afternoon. A nice hag I shall look to-night. Which of them is it, my dear?"
"Already? Clo, is my wig straight? Darn those guys, I haven't gotten a wink of sleep all afternoon. I'm going to look like a mess tonight. Which one of them is it, my dear?"
Cleone was peering out of the window.
Cleone was looking out of the window.
"'Tis James and Jennifer, Aunt." She came back into the room. "It seems an age since I saw Jenny."
"It's James and Jennifer, Aunt." She walked back into the room. "It feels like forever since I saw Jenny."
Lady Malmerstoke studied herself in her little mirror.
Lady Malmerstoke looked at herself in her small mirror.
"Is she the child who lives down in the country?"
"Is she the girl who lives out in the countryside?"
"Yes—Jenny Winton, such a sweet little thing. She has come up with Mr. Winton for a few weeks. I am so glad she managed to induce him to bring her!" Cleone ran forward as the two Wintons were ushered in. "Jenny, dear!"
"Yes—Jenny Winton, such a sweet girl. She has come up with Mr. Winton for a few weeks. I'm so glad she was able to convince him to bring her!" Cleone ran forward as the two Wintons were shown in. "Jenny, dear!"
Jennifer was half a head shorter than Cleone, a shy child with soft grey eyes and mouse-coloured hair. She flung her arms round Cleone's neck.
Jennifer was slightly shorter than Cleone, a shy kid with soft gray eyes and mouse-colored hair. She wrapped her arms around Cleone's neck.
"Oh, Clo, how prodigious elegant you look!" she whispered.
"Oh, Clo, you look incredibly elegant!" she whispered.
"And oh, Jenny, how pretty you look!" retorted Cleone. "Aunt Sally, this is my dear Jennifer!"
"And oh, Jenny, you look so pretty!" Cleone replied. "Aunt Sally, this is my dear Jennifer!"
Jennifer curtseyed.
Jennifer curtsied.
"How do you do, ma'am?" she said in a voice fluttering with nervousness.
"How are you, ma'am?" she said in a voice trembling with nervousness.
"I am very well, child. Come and sit down beside me." She patted the couch invitingly. "Is this your first visit to town, my dear?"
"I’m doing great, kid. Come and sit next to me." She patted the couch encouragingly. "Is this your first time visiting the town, sweetheart?"
Jennifer sat down on the edge of the couch. She stole an awed glance at Lady Malmerstoke's powdered wig.
Jennifer sat on the edge of the couch. She took a amazed glance at Lady Malmerstoke's powdered wig.
"Yes, ma'am. It is so exciting."
"Yeah, ma'am. It's super exciting."
"I'll warrant it is! And have you been to many balls, yet?"
"I bet it is! And have you been to a lot of parties yet?"
"N-no." The little face clouded over. "Papa does not go out very much," she explained.
"N-no." The little face fell. "Dad doesn't go out very much," she explained.
Cleone sank on to a stool beside them, her silks swirling about her.
Cleone settled onto a stool next to them, her silks swirling around her.
"Oh, Auntie, please take Jenny to the Dering ball next week!" she said impulsively. "You will come, won't you, sweet?"
"Oh, Auntie, please take Jenny to the Dering ball next week!" she said impulsively. "You'll come, right, sweet?"
Jennifer blushed and stammered.
Jennifer flushed and stumbled over her words.
"To be sure," nodded her ladyship. "Of course she will come! James, sit down! You should know by now how the sight of anyone on their feet fatigues me, silly boy! Dear me, child, how like you are to your brother! Are you looking at my wig? Monstrous, isn't it?"
"Of course," her ladyship nodded. "She'll definitely come! James, sit down! You should know by now how seeing anyone standing makes me tired, silly boy! My goodness, child, you look so much like your brother! Are you staring at my wig? It's ridiculous, isn’t it?"
Jennifer was covered with confusion.
Jennifer was baffled.
"Oh, no, ma'am, I—"
"Oh, no, ma'am, I—"
Her ladyship chuckled.
She chuckled.
"Of course you were. How could you help it? Cleone tells me it is a ridiculous creation, don't you, my love?"
"Of course you were. How could you not be? Cleone tells me it’s a silly creation, doesn’t she, my love?"
"I do, and I truly think it!" answered Cleone, her eyes dancing. "'Tis just a little more impossible than the last."
"I do, and I really believe it!" Cleone replied, her eyes sparkling. "It's just a bit more impossible than the last one."
"There!" Lady Malmerstoke turned back to Jennifer. "She is an impertinent hussy, is she not?"
"There!" Lady Malmerstoke turned back to Jennifer. "She is such an arrogant brat, isn't she?"
"Could she be impertinent?" asked James fondly.
"Could she be rude?" asked James affectionately.
"Very easily she could, and is," nodded her ladyship. "A minx."
"She definitely could, and she is," her ladyship nodded. "A troublemaker."
"Oh!" Jennifer was shocked.
"Whoa!" Jennifer was shocked.
"Don't attend to her!" besought Cleone. "Sometimes she is very ill-natured, as you see."
"Don't pay attention to her!" Cleone pleaded. "Sometimes she's really rude, just like you can see."
Jennifer ventured a very small laugh. She had resolutely dragged her eyes from the prodigious wig, and was now gazing at Cleone.
Jennifer let out a tiny laugh. She had firmly pulled her gaze away from the huge wig and was now looking at Cleone.
"You—you seem quite different," she told her.
"You—you seem really different," she told her.
Cleone shook her golden head.
Cleone shook her blonde hair.
"'Tis only that Aunt Sally has tricked me out in fine clothes," she replied. "I'm—oh, I am the same!" she laughed, but not very steadily. "Am I not, James?"
"'It's just that Aunt Sally has dressed me up in these fancy clothes," she replied. "I'm—oh, I’m still the same!" she laughed, though not very confidently. "Aren't I, James?"
"Always the same," he said ardently. "Always beautiful."
"Always the same," he said passionately. "Always beautiful."
"I will not have it," said Lady Malmerstoke severely. "You'll turn the child's head, if 'tis not turned already."
"I won't allow it," Lady Malmerstoke said firmly. "You'll confuse the child, if they aren't already confused."
"Oh, it is, it is!" cried Cleone. "I am quite too dreadfully vain! And there is the bell again! James, who is it? It's vastly bad-mannered to peep, but you may do it. Quick!"
"Oh, it is, it is!" Cleone exclaimed. "I really am way too incredibly vain! And there's the bell again! James, who's there? It's really rude to peek, but you can do it. Hurry!"
James went to the window.
James looked out the window.
"Too late," he said. "They are in, whoever they are."
"Too late," he said. "They've already come in, no matter who they are."
"'Twill be Thomas," decided Lady Malmerstoke. "I wonder if he is any fatter?"
"'It will be Thomas," Lady Malmerstoke decided. "I wonder if he’s any fatter?"
Jennifer giggled. She had never met anything quite like this queer, voluminous old lady before.
Jennifer giggled. She had never encountered anyone quite like this strange, large old lady before.
"Is—is Sir Maurice coming?" she inquired.
"Is Sir Maurice coming?" she asked.
"I told him to be sure to come," answered her ladyship. "You know him, don't you?"
"I told him to make sure he comes," her ladyship replied. "You know him, right?"
"Oh, yes!" breathed Jennifer.
"Oh, totally!" breathed Jennifer.
"Sah Maurice and Mr. Jettan," announced the little black page.
"Sah Maurice and Mr. Jettan," announced the little black page.
"Drat!" said her ladyship. She rose. "Where's your son?" she demanded, shaking her finger at Sir Maurice.
"Ugh!" said her ladyship. She got up. "Where's your son?" she asked, pointing her finger at Sir Maurice.
Sir Maurice kissed her hand.
Sir Maurice kissed her hand.
"Sally, you grow ruder and ruder," he reproved her.
"Sally, you’re becoming ruder and ruder," he told her.
"Maurice," she retorted, "you were ever a punctilious ramrod. Philip's the only one of you I want to see. He says such audacious things," she explained. "So gratifying to an old woman. Well, Tom?"
"Maurice," she shot back, "you've always been such a stickler for the rules. Philip's the only one I want to see. He says such bold things," she added. "It's so refreshing for an older woman. So, Tom?"
Thomas bowed very low.
Thomas bowed deeply.
"Well, Sally?"
"Hey, Sally?"
"That's not polite," she said. "You can see I am very well. I declare you are growing thinner!"
"That's not polite," she said. "You can see I'm doing just fine. I swear you’re getting thinner!"
Thomas drew himself up sheepishly.
Thomas stood up sheepishly.
"Am I, my dear?"
"Am I, my love?"
Her ladyship gave a little crow of delight.
Her ladyship let out a small cheer of joy.
"You've been taking exercise!" she exclaimed. "If you continue at this rate—I vow I'll marry you in a month!"
"You've been working out!" she exclaimed. "If you keep this up—I swear I'll marry you in a month!"
"I wish you would, my dear," said Tom seriously.
"I wish you would, my dear," Tom said seriously.
"Oh, I shall one day, never fear!" She caught sight of Jennifer's astonished expression and chuckled. "Now, Tom, behave yourself! You are shocking the child!" she whispered.
"Oh, I will one day, don’t worry!" She noticed Jennifer's surprised look and laughed. "Now, Tom, calm down! You're shocking the kid!" she whispered.
"I? What have I done? She's shocked at your forwardness!"
"I? What did I do? She's stunned by how bold you are!"
Sir Maurice had walked over to Cleone. She held out her hands, and he made as if to kiss them. She snatched them back.
Sir Maurice walked over to Cleone. She held out her hands, and he pretended to kiss them. She quickly pulled them back.
"Oh, no, no!" she cried. "Sir Maurice!"
"Oh, no, no!" she exclaimed. "Sir Maurice!"
He smiled down at her upturned face.
He smiled down at her face, which was turned up toward him.
"In truth, my dear, you've so changed from the little Cleone I know that I dare take no liberties."
"In truth, my dear, you’ve changed so much from the little Cleone I know that I can’t take any chances."
Her mouth quivered suddenly; she caught at the lapels of his coat.
Her mouth suddenly trembled; she grabbed the lapels of his coat.
"No, no, don't say it, sir! I am the same! Oh, I am, I am!"
"No, no, don’t say it, sir! I’m the same! Oh, I am, I am!"
"What's Cleone doing?" inquired Lady Malmerstoke. "Kissing Maurice? Now who's forward?"
"What's Cleone up to?" Lady Malmerstoke asked. "Kissing Maurice? Now that's bold."
Cleone smiled through her tears.
Cleone smiled despite her tears.
"You are, Aunt Sally. And you are in a very teasing humour!"
"You are, Aunt Sally. And you’re in a really playful mood!"
Sir Maurice pressed her hands gently. He turned to the curtseying Jennifer.
Sir Maurice held her hands gently. He turned to Jennifer, who was curtsying.
"Why, Jenny? This is a surprise! How are you, child?"
"Why, Jenny? This is a surprise! How are you, kid?"
"Very well, I thank you, sir," she answered. "Very happy to be in London."
"Thank you so much, sir," she replied. "I'm really happy to be in London."
"The first visit! Where are you staying?"
"The first visit! Where are you staying?"
"With Grandmamma, out at Kensington," she said.
"With Grandma, out in Kensington," she said.
Lady Malmerstoke clutched Tom's arm.
Lady Malmerstoke held Tom's arm.
"Kensington, poor child!" she murmured. "For heaven's sake everyone sit down! No, Maurice, that chair is too low for me. I'll take the couch." She proceeded to do so. As a matter of course, Tom sat down beside her. The others arranged themselves in two pairs, Sir Maurice leading Jennifer to a chair near the fire, and Cleone going to the window-seat with the admiring James.
"Kensington, poor thing!" she whispered. "For heaven's sake, everyone sit down! No, Maurice, that chair is too low for me. I'll take the couch." She did just that. Naturally, Tom sat down next to her. The others settled into pairs, with Sir Maurice leading Jennifer to a chair near the fire, and Cleone heading to the window seat with the admiring James.
Five minutes later the bell rang for the third time, and Jennifer received the worst shock of the afternoon. The page announced Mr. Philip Jettan, and Philip came into the room.
Five minutes later, the bell rang for the third time, and Jennifer got the biggest shock of the afternoon. The page announced Mr. Philip Jettan, and Philip walked into the room.
Sir Maurice felt Jennifer's start of surprise, and saw her stare past him as though she saw at least three ghosts.
Sir Maurice sensed Jennifer's surprise and noticed her gaze drifting past him as if she were seeing at least three ghosts.
Philip went to his hostess and dropped on one knee to kiss her hand. He was dressed in puce and old gold. Jennifer thought she had never seen anything so gorgeous, or so astonishing. She did not believe for a moment that it was her old playfellow, Philip.
Philip approached his hostess and knelt down to kiss her hand. He was wearing a puce and old gold outfit. Jennifer thought she had never seen anything so beautiful or so surprising. She couldn't believe for a second that it was her childhood friend, Philip.
"Madame, I am late!" said Philip. "I ask a thousand pardons."
"Ma'am, I'm late!" said Philip. "I apologize a thousand times."
"And you are sure you'll receive them!" chuckled her ladyship. "I'd give them, but that it would fatigue me so. Where's that ode? Don't tell me you've forgotten it!"
"And you’re sure you’ll get them!" her ladyship chuckled. "I’d give them to you, but it would tire me out too much. Where’s that ode? Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten it!"
"Forgotten it! Never! It is a very beautiful ode, too, in my best style. Le voici!" He handed her a rolled parchment sheet, tied with mauve ribbons, and with violets cunningly inserted.
"Forgot it? Never! It’s a really beautiful poem, too, in my best style. Here it is!" He handed her a rolled-up parchment, tied with mauve ribbons, and with violets cleverly tucked in.
"You delightful boy!" cried her ladyship, inspecting it. "Violets! How did you know they were my favourite flowers?"
"You wonderful boy!" exclaimed her ladyship, examining it. "Violets! How did you know they were my favorite flowers?"
"I knew instinctively," answered Philip solemnly.
"I knew instinctively," Philip replied solemnly.
"Of course you did! But how charming of you! I declare I daren't untie it till the violets are dead. Look, Tom, is it not pretty? And isn't Philip sweet to write me an ode?"
"Of course you did! But how sweet of you! I really can't untie it until the violets are gone. Look, Tom, isn't it lovely? And isn't it nice of Philip to write me a poem?"
"I am looking," said Tom gloomily. "Ye rascal, how dare you try to steal my lady's heart away from me?"
"I am looking," Tom said sadly. "You rascal, how dare you try to steal my lady's heart from me?"
"I should be more than human an I did not!" replied Philip promptly.
"I should be more than human and I didn't!" replied Philip quickly.
Lady Malmerstoke was showing the dainty roll to Sir Maurice.
Lady Malmerstoke was showing the delicate roll to Sir Maurice.
"An ode to my wig," she told him. "Written in French."
"An ode to my wig," she said to him. "Written in French."
"An ode to your what?" asked Thomas.
"An ode to your what?" Thomas asked.
"My wig, Tom, my wig! You were not here when we discussed it. Cleone thought it a prodigious ugly wig, but Philip would have none of it. He said such pretty things about it, and promised me an ode for it! Philip, did I thank you?"
"My wig, Tom, my wig! You weren’t here when we talked about it. Cleone thought it was an incredibly ugly wig, but Philip didn’t agree. He said such nice things about it and promised me a poem for it! Philip, did I thank you?"
Philip was bowing over Cleone's hand. He turned.
Philip was bending over Cleone's hand. He turned.
"With your eyes, madame, eloquently! But I need no thanks; it was an honour and a joy."
"With your eyes, ma'am, so expressively! But I don’t need any thanks; it was an honor and a joy."
"Think of that!" nodded my lady, looking from Tom to Sir Maurice. "Philip, come and be presented to Mistress Jennifer. Or do you know her?"
"Can you believe that?" my lady nodded, glancing from Tom to Sir Maurice. "Philip, come over and meet Mistress Jennifer. Or do you already know her?"
Philip released Cleone's hand, and swung round.
Philip let go of Cleone's hand and turned around.
"Jennifer! Of course I know her!" He went across the room. "Why, Jenny, where do you spring from? How are you?"
"Jennifer! Of course I know her!" He walked across the room. "Hey, Jenny, where did you come from? How are you?"
Jennifer gazed up at him with wide eyes.
Jennifer looked up at him with wide eyes.
"Philip? Is—is it really—you?" she whispered.
"Philip? Is it really you?" she whispered.
"You didn't know me? Jenny, how unkind! Surely I haven't changed as much as that?"
"You didn't know me? Jenny, how rude! I can't have changed that much, can I?"
"Y-you have," she averred. "More!"
"You have," she said. "More!"
"I have not, I swear I have not! Father, go away! Let me sit here and talk to Jennifer!"
"I haven't, I promise I haven't! Dad, just go away! Let me sit here and talk to Jennifer!"
Only too glad to obey, Sir Maurice rose.
Only too happy to comply, Sir Maurice stood up.
"He is very peremptory and autocratic, isn't he, my dear?" he smiled.
"He is pretty forceful and controlling, isn't he, my dear?" he smiled.
Philip sank into the vacated chair.
Philip sank into the empty chair.
"I—I feel I ought to call you Mr. Jettan!" said Jennifer.
"I—I think I should call you Mr. Jettan!" said Jennifer.
"Jenny! If you dare to do such a thing I shall—I shall—"
"Jenny! If you even think about doing something like that, I’ll—I’ll—"
"What will you do?"
"What are you going to do?"
"Write a canzonet to your big eyes!" he laughed.
"Write a little song about your big eyes!" he laughed.
Jennifer blushed, and her lips trembled into a smile.
Jennifer blushed, and her lips quivered into a smile.
"Will you really? I should like that, I think, Mr. Jettan."
"Will you actually? I’d like that, I think, Mr. Jettan."
"It shall be ready by noon to-morrow," said Philip at once, "if you will promise not to misname me!"
"It'll be ready by noon tomorrow," Philip said immediately, "if you promise not to call me the wrong name!"
"But—"
"But—"
"Jenny, I vow I have not changed so much! 'Tis only my silly clothes!"
"Jenny, I promise I haven't changed that much! It's just my silly clothes!"
"That's—what Clo said when I told her she had changed."
"That's what Clo said when I told her she had changed."
"Oh!" Philip shot a glance towards the unconscious Cleone. "Did she say that?"
"Oh!" Philip quickly looked over at the unconscious Cleone. "Did she really say that?"
"Yes. But I think she has changed, don't you?"
"Yeah. But I feel like she has changed, don’t you?"
"De tête en pieds," said Philip slowly.
"From head to toe," said Philip slowly.
"What is that?" Jennifer looked rather alarmed.
"What is that?" Jennifer looked quite alarmed.
Philip turned back to her.
Philip faced her again.
"That is a foolish habit, Jenny. They say I chatter French all day. Which is very affected."
"That's a silly habit, Jenny. They say I talk in French all day. Which is really pretentious."
"French? Do you talk French now? How wonderful!" breathed Jennifer. "Say something else! Please!"
"French? Are you speaking French now? That's amazing!" Jennifer exclaimed. "Say something else! Please!"
"La lumière de tes beaux yeux me pénètre jusqu'au cœur." He bowed, smiling.
"The light from your beautiful eyes penetrates my heart." He bowed, smiling.
"Oh! What does that mean?"
"Oh! What does that mean?"
"It wouldn't be good for you to know," answered Philip gravely.
"It wouldn't be good for you to know," Philip replied seriously.
"Oh! but I would like to know, I think," she said naïvely.
"Oh! but I'd really like to know, I think," she said innocently.
"I said that—you have very beautiful eyes."
"I said that—you have really gorgeous eyes."
"Did you? How—how dreadful of you! And you won't forget the—the can—can—what you were going to write for me, will you?"
"Did you? How—how awful of you! And you won't forget the—the can—can—what you were going to write for me, will you?"
"The canzonet. No, I think it must be a sonnet. And the flower—alas, your flower is out of season!"
"The canzonet. No, I think it must be a sonnet. And the flower—oh no, your flower is out of season!"
"Is it? What is my flower?"
"Is it? What's my flower?"
"A daisy."
"A daisy flower."
She considered this.
She thought about it.
"I do not like daisies very much. Haven't I another flower?"
"I don't really like daisies. Don't I have another flower?"
"Yes, a snowdrop."
"Yep, a snowdrop."
"Oh, that is pretty!" She clapped her hands. "Is it too late for snowdrops?"
"Oh, that's really pretty!" She clapped her hands. "Is it too late for snowdrops?"
"I defy it to be too late!" said Philip. "You shall have them if I have to fly to the ends of the earth for them!"
"I challenge it to be too late!" said Philip. "You will get them, even if I have to fly to the ends of the earth for them!"
Jennifer giggled.
Jennifer laughed.
"But you couldn't, could you? Cleone! Cleone!"
"But you couldn't, could you? Cleone! Cleone!"
Cleone came across the room.
Cleone walked across the room.
"Yes, Jenny? Has Mr. Jettan been saying dreadfully flattering things to you?"
"Yes, Jenny? Has Mr. Jettan been saying really flattering things to you?"
"N—yes, I think he has! And he says I must still call him Philip. And oh! he is going to write a—a sonnet to my eyes, tied with snowdrops! Mr. J—Philip, what is Cleone's flower?"
"N—yes, I think he has! And he says I must still call him Philip. And oh! he is going to write a sonnet to my eyes, tied with snowdrops! Mr. J—Philip, what is Cleone's flower?"
Philip had risen. He put a chair forward for Cleone.
Philip had gotten up. He pulled out a chair for Cleone.
"Can you ask, Jenny? What but a rose?"
"Can you ask, Jenny? What else could it be but a rose?"
Cleone sat down. Her lips smiled steadily.
Cleone sat down. She smiled gently.
"A rose? Surely it's a flaunting flower, sir?"
"A rose? It's definitely a showy flower, right?"
"Ah, mademoiselle, it must be that you have never seen a rose just bursting from the bud!"
"Ah, miss, it seems you’ve never seen a rose just blooming from the bud!"
"Oh, la! I am overcome, sir! And I have not yet thanked you for the bouquet you sent me this morning!"
"Oh, wow! I’m so overwhelmed, sir! And I haven’t even thanked you for the bouquet you sent me this morning!"
Philip's eyes travelled to the violets at her breast.
Philip's eyes moved to the violets at her chest.
"I did not send violets," he said mournfully.
"I didn't send any violets," he said sadly.
Cleone's eyes flashed.
Cleone's eyes sparkled.
"No. These"—she touched the flowers caressingly—"I have from Sir Deryk Brenderby."
"No. These"—she gently touched the flowers—"I got from Sir Deryk Brenderby."
"He is very fortunate, mademoiselle. Would that I were also!"
"He is very lucky, miss. I wish I were too!"
"I think you are, sir. Mistress Ann Nutley wore your carnations yesterday the whole evening." Cleone found that she was looking straight into his eyes. Hurriedly she looked away, but a pulse was beating in her throat. For one fleeting instant she had seen the old Philip, grave, honest, a little appealing. If only—if only—
"I think you are, sir. Mistress Ann Nutley wore your carnations yesterday all evening." Cleone realized she was staring directly into his eyes. She quickly looked away, but she could feel her heart racing in her throat. For a brief moment, she had glimpsed the old Philip—serious, sincere, a bit vulnerable. If only—if only—
"Mr. Jett—I mean Philip! Will you teach me to say something in French?"
"Mr. Jett—I mean Philip! Can you teach me how to say something in French?"
"Why, of course, chérie. What would you say?"
"Of course, darling. What do you want to say?"
The pulse stopped its excited beating; the blue eyes lost their wistful softness. Cleone turned to James, who stood at her elbow.
The pulse ceased its excited rhythm; the blue eyes lost their longing softness. Cleone turned to James, who was standing next to her.
FifteenFifteen
Lady Malmerstoke on HusbandsLady Malmerstoke on Partners
"And he brought it himself, yesterday morning, tied with snowdrops. I don't know how he got them, for they are over, are they not, Clo? But there they were, with the prettiest verse you can imagine. It said my eyes were twin pools of grey! Isn't that beautiful?"
"And he brought it himself, yesterday morning, tied with snowdrops. I don't know how he got them, since they're out of season, right, Clo? But there they were, with the prettiest verse you can imagine. It said my eyes were twin pools of gray! Isn't that beautiful?"
Cleone jerked one shoulder.
Cleone shrugged.
"It is not very original," she said.
"It’s not very original," she said.
"Don't you like it?" asked Jennifer reproachfully.
"Don’t you like it?" Jennifer asked with disapproval.
Cleone was ashamed of her flash of ill-humour.
Cleone felt embarrassed about her moment of bad mood.
"Yes, dear, of course I do. So Mr. Jettan brought it to you himself, did he?"
"Yes, sweetheart, of course I do. So Mr. Jettan delivered it to you personally, did he?"
"Indeed, yes! And stayed a full hour, talking to Papa and to me. What do you think? He has begged me to be sure and dance with him on Wednesday! Is it not kind of him?"
"Absolutely! He stayed for a whole hour, chatting with Papa and me. What do you think? He asked me to promise I’d dance with him on Wednesday! Isn’t that sweet of him?"
"Very," said Cleone dully.
"Very," Cleone said flatly.
"I cannot imagine why he should want them," Jennifer prattled on. "Jamie says he is at Mistress Nutley's feet. Is she very lovely, Clo?"
"I can't imagine why he would want them," Jennifer chattered on. "Jamie says he's completely devoted to Mistress Nutley. Is she really beautiful, Clo?"
"I don't know. Yes, I suppose she is."
"I don't know. Yeah, I guess she is."
"Philip is teaching me to speak French. It is so droll, and he laughs at my accent. Can you speak French, Clo?"
"Philip is teaching me how to speak French. It's so funny, and he laughs at my accent. Can you speak French, Clo?"
"A little. No doubt he would laugh at my accent if he ever heard it."
"A bit. There's no doubt he would laugh at my accent if he ever heard it."
"Oh, I do not think so! He could not, could he? Clo, I asked if he did not think you were very beautiful, and he said—"
"Oh, I don’t think so! He couldn’t, could he? Clo, I asked if he thought you were very beautiful, and he said—"
"Jenny, you must not ask things like that!"
"Jenny, you shouldn't ask stuff like that!"
"He did not mind! Truly, he did not! He just laughed—he is always laughing, Clo!—and said that there was no one who did not think so. Was not that neat?"
"He didn’t mind at all! Honestly, he didn’t! He just laughed—he’s always laughing, Clo!—and said that everyone thought the same. Wasn’t that clever?"
"Very," said Cleone.
"Totally," said Cleone.
Jennifer drew nearer.
Jennifer approached.
"Cleone, may I tell you a secret?"
"Cleone, can I share a secret with you?"
A fierce pain shot through Cleone.
A sudden pain hit Cleone.
"A secret? What is it?" she asked quickly.
"A secret? What is it?" she asked eagerly.
"Why, Clo, how strange you look! 'Tis only that I know James to be in love with—you!"
"Why, Clo, you look so different! It's just that I know James is in love with—you!"
Cleone sank back. She started to laugh from sheer relief.
Cleone leaned back. She began to laugh out of pure relief.
"I do not see that it is funny," said Jennifer, hurt.
"I don’t think it’s funny," Jennifer said, feeling hurt.
"No, no, dear! It—it is not that—I mean, of course, of course, I knew that James was—was—fond of me."
"No, no, sweetheart! It—it’s not that—I mean, of course, I knew that James was—was—into me."
"Did you? Oh—oh, are you going to marry him?" Jennifer's voice squeaked with excitement.
"Did you? Oh—are you really going to marry him?" Jennifer's voice squeaked with excitement.
"Jenny, you ask such dreadful questions! No, I am not."
"Jenny, you ask such awful questions! No, I’m not."
"But—but he loves you, Clo! Don't you love him?"
"But—but he loves you, Clo! Don’t you love him?"
"Not like that. James only thinks he loves me. He's too young. I—Tell me about your dress, dear!"
"Not like that. James just thinks he loves me. He's too young. I—Tell me about your dress, dear!"
"For the ball?" Jennifer sat up, nothing loth. "'Tis of white silk—"
"For the ball?" Jennifer sat up, clearly interested. "It's made of white silk—"
"Sir Deryk Brenderby!"
"Sir Deryk Brenderby!"
Jennifer started.
Jennifer began.
"Oh, dear!" she said regretfully.
"Oh no!" she said regretfully.
A tall, loose-limbed man came in.
A tall, lanky man walked in.
"Fair Mistress Cleone! I am happy, indeed, to have found you in! I kiss your hands, dear lady!"
"Lovely Mistress Cleone! I'm so glad to have found you here! I kiss your hands, dear lady!"
Cleone drew them away, smiling.
Cleone smiled and pulled them away.
"Mistress Jennifer Winton, Sir Deryk."
"Ms. Jennifer Winton, Sir Deryk."
Brenderby seemed to become suddenly aware of Jenny's presence. He bowed. Jennifer curtseyed demurely, and took refuge behind her friend.
Brenderby suddenly seemed to notice Jenny. He bowed. Jennifer curtsied shyly and hid behind her friend.
Sir Deryk lowered himself into a chair.
Sir Deryk sat down in a chair.
"Mistress Cleone, can you guess why I have come?"
"Mistress Cleone, do you know why I’m here?"
"To see me!" said Cleone archly.
"To see me!" Cleone said playfully.
"That is the obvious, fair tormentor! Another reason had I."
"That is the obvious, fair tormentor! I had another reason."
"The first should be enough, sir," answered Cleone, with downcast eyes.
"The first should be enough, sir," Cleone replied, looking down.
"And is, Most Beautiful. But the other reason concerns you also."
"And is, Most Beautiful. But the other reason is about you too."
"La! You intrigue me, sir! Pray, what is it?"
"La! You interest me, sir! Please, what is it?"
"To beg, on my knees, that you will dance with me on Wednesday!"
"Please, I'm on my knees, begging you to dance with me on Wednesday!"
"Oh, I don't know!" Cleone shook her head. "I doubt all the dances are gone."
"Oh, I don't know!" Cleone shook her head. "I doubt all the dances are gone."
"Ah, no, dearest lady! Not all!"
"Ah, no, dear lady! Not at all!"
"Indeed, I think so! I cannot promise anything."
"Sure, I think so! I can't promise anything."
"But you give me hope?"
"But you give me hope?"
"I will not take it from you," said Cleone. "Perhaps Jennifer will give you a dance."
"I won't take that from you," Cleone said. "Maybe Jennifer will dance with you."
Sir Deryk did not look much elated. But he bowed to Jennifer.
Sir Deryk didn’t seem very happy. But he bowed to Jennifer.
"May that happiness be mine, madam?"
"Can that happiness be mine, ma'am?"
"Th—thank you," stammered Jennifer. "If you please!"
"Th—thank you," Jennifer stumbled over her words. "If you could!"
Sir Deryk bowed again and straightway forgot her existence.
Sir Deryk bowed again and immediately forgot she was even there.
"You wear my primroses, fairest!" he said to Cleone. "I scarce dared to hope so modest a posy would be so honoured."
"You wear my primroses, the prettiest!" he said to Cleone. "I hardly dared to hope such a simple bouquet would be so treasured."
Cleone glanced down at the pale yellow blooms.
Cleone looked down at the light yellow flowers.
"Oh, are they yours? I had forgot," she said cruelly.
"Oh, are they yours? I totally forgot," she said harshly.
"Ah, Cleone!"
"Hey, Cleone!"
Cleone raised her brows.
Cleone raised her eyebrows.
"My name, sir?"
"What's your name, sir?"
"Mistress Cleone," corrected Brenderby, bowing.
"Ms. Cleone," corrected Brenderby, bowing.
Lady Malmerstoke chose that moment at which to billow into the room. She leaned on the arm of one Mr. Jettan.
Lady Malmerstoke chose that moment to sweep into the room. She leaned on the arm of Mr. Jettan.
"Philip, you are a sad fellow! You do not mean one word of what you say! Oh, lud! I have chanced on a reception. Give ye good den, Jenny, my dear. Sir Deryk? Thus early in the morning? I think you know Mr. Jettan?"
"Philip, you’re such a sad guy! You don’t mean a word of what you say! Oh my! I’ve stumbled into a gathering. Good morning to you, Jenny, my dear. Sir Deryk? This early in the morning? I assume you know Mr. Jettan?"
The two men bowed.
The two men bowed.
"I have the pleasure, Lady Malmerstoke," said Brenderby. "I did not see you last night, Jettan? You were not at Gregory's card-party?"
"I have the pleasure, Lady Malmerstoke," said Brenderby. "I didn’t see you last night, Jettan. You weren’t at Gregory’s card party?"
"Last night?—last night? No, I was at White's with my father. Mademoiselle, your very obedient! Et la petite!"
"Last night?—last night? No, I was at White's with my dad. Miss, I'm here to serve! And the little one!"
"Bonjour, monsieur!" ventured Jennifer shyly.
"Hi there, sir!" ventured Jennifer shyly.
Philip swept her a leg.
Philip swept her off her feet.
"Mademoiselle a fait des grands progrès," he said.
"She has made great progress," he said.
She wrinkled her brow.
She furrowed her brow.
"Great—progress?" she hazarded.
"Great—any progress?" she asked.
"Of course! And how is mademoiselle?"
"Of course! And how is miss?"
"Very well, I thank you, sir."
"Okay, thank you, sir."
Lady Malmerstoke sank into a large armchair.
Lady Malmerstoke sank into a big armchair.
"Well, I trust I don't intrude?" she remarked. "Clo, where is my embroidery?" She turned to her guests. "I never set a stitch, of course. It would fatigue me too much. But it looks industrious to have it by me, doesn't it?"
"Well, I hope I'm not interrupting?" she said. "Clo, where's my embroidery?" She faced her guests. "I never actually sew, of course. It would tire me out too much. But it seems productive to have it nearby, right?"
Cleone and Brenderby had walked to the table in search of the missing embroidery. Cleone looked over her shoulder.
Cleone and Brenderby had walked to the table looking for the missing embroidery. Cleone glanced back over her shoulder.
"You must not believe what she says," she told them. "Aunt Sarah embroiders beautifully. She is not nearly as lazy as she would have you think."
"You shouldn't believe what she says," she told them. "Aunt Sarah stitches beautifully. She's not nearly as lazy as she wants you to think."
"Not lazy, my love—indolent. A much nicer word. Thank you, my dear." She received her stitchery and laid it down. "I will tell you all a secret. Oh, Philip knows! Philip, you need not listen."
"Not lazy, my love—indolent. A much nicer word. Thank you, my dear." She took her sewing and set it aside. "I have a secret to share. Oh, Philip knows! Philip, you don’t have to listen."
Philip was perched on a chair-arm.
Philip was sitting on the arm of a chair.
"A million thanks, Aunt!"
"Thanks a million, Aunt!"
"That is very unkind of you!" she reproached him. "You tell my secret before ever I have time to say a word!"
"That's really unkind of you!" she scolded him. "You reveal my secret before I even have a chance to say anything!"
"Eh bien! You should not have suggested that I did not want to listen to your voice."
"Well! You shouldn't have implied that I didn't want to hear your voice."
"When I am, indeed, your aunt, I shall talk to you very seriously about flattering old women," she said severely.
"When I really am your aunt, I will have a serious talk with you about flattering older women," she said with a stern expression.
Cleone clapped her hands.
Cleone clapped her hands.
"Oh, Aunt Sally! You are going to wed Mr. Jettan?"
"Oh, Aunt Sally! You’re going to marry Mr. Jettan?"
"One of them," nodded her aunt. "I gather that this one"—she smiled up at Philip—"is going to wed Someone Else. And I do not think I would have him in any case."
"One of them," her aunt nodded. "I understand that this one"—she smiled up at Philip—"is going to marry Someone Else. And I don't think I would want him anyway."
"And now who is unkind?" cried Philip. "I've a mind to run away with you as you enter the church!"
"And now who’s being unkind?" cried Philip. "I feel like running away with you as you go into the church!"
Cold fear was stealing through Cleone. Mechanically she congratulated her aunt. Through a haze she heard Brenderby's voice and Jennifer's. So Philip was going to marry Someone Else? No doubt it was Ann Nutley, the designing minx!
Cold fear was creeping through Cleone. She automatically congratulated her aunt. Through a blur, she heard Brenderby's voice and Jennifer's. So Philip was going to marry Someone Else? It must be Ann Nutley, that scheming flirt!
When Philip came presently to her side she was gayer than ever, sparkling with merriment, and seemingly without a care in the world. She drew Sir Deryk into the conversation, flirting outrageously. She parried all Philip's sallies and laughed at Sir Deryk's witticisms. Then Philip went to talk to Jennifer. A pair of hungry, angry, jealous, and would-be careless blue eyes followed him and grew almost hard.
When Philip got to her side, she was happier than ever, filled with joy and seeming completely carefree. She pulled Sir Deryk into the conversation, flirting shamelessly. She effortlessly countered all of Philip's remarks and laughed at Sir Deryk's jokes. Then Philip went to talk to Jennifer. A pair of hungry, angry, jealous, and pretending-to-be-casual blue eyes watched him and became almost cold.
When the guests had gone Cleone felt as though her head were full of fire. Her cheeks burned, her eyes were glittering. Lady Malmerstoke looked at her.
When the guests left, Cleone felt like her head was on fire. Her cheeks were hot, and her eyes sparkled. Lady Malmerstoke watched her.
"You are hot, my love. Open the window."
"You’re so warm, my love. Open the window."
Cleone obeyed, cooling her cheeks against the glass panes.
Cleone complied, pressing her cheeks against the glass panes to cool them down.
"How very shy that child is!" remarked my lady.
"That child is so shy!" my lady commented.
"Jenny? Yes. Very, is she not?"
"Jenny? Yeah. She really is, right?"
"I thought Sir Deryk might have noticed her a little more than he did."
"I thought Sir Deryk might have taken more notice of her than he actually did."
"He had no chance, had he? She was quite monopolised."
"He had no chance, did he? She was totally taken."
Her ladyship cast a shrewd glance towards the back of Cleone's head. She smiled unseen.
Her ladyship shot a sharp look at the back of Cleone's head. She smiled without anyone noticing.
"Well, my love, to turn to other matters, which is it to be—Philip or Sir Deryk?"
"Well, my love, moving on to another topic, which one will it be—Philip or Sir Deryk?"
Cleone started.
Cleone began.
"What do you mean, Aunt? Which is it to be?"
"What do you mean, Aunt? Which is it to be?"
"Which are you going to smile upon? You have given both a deal of encouragement. I don't count young James, of course. He's a babe."
"Which one are you going to smile at? You've given both a lot of encouragement. I'm not counting young James, of course. He's just a baby."
"Please, please—"
"Please, please—"
"I don't like Sir Deryk. No, I don't like him at all. He has no true politeness, or he would have talked a little more to me, or to Jenny. Which do you intend to wed, my dear?"
"I don't like Sir Deryk. No, I really don't like him at all. He has no real politeness, or he would have spoken a bit more to me or to Jenny. Which one do you plan to marry, my dear?"
"Neither?"
"Not either?"
"My dear Cleone!" Her ladyship was shocked. "Then why do you encourage them to make love to you? Now be advised by me! Have Sir Deryk!"
"My dear Cleone!" Her ladyship was shocked. "Then why do you let them flirt with you? Listen to me! Go for Sir Deryk!"
Cleone gave a trembling laugh.
Cleone let out a nervous laugh.
"I thought you did not like him?"
"I thought you didn't like him?"
"No more I do. But that's not to say he'd make a bad husband. On the contrary. He'd let you do as you please, and he'd not be for ever pestering you with his presence."
"No, I don’t. But that doesn’t mean he’d be a bad husband. Quite the opposite. He’d let you do whatever you want, and he wouldn’t be constantly hovering around you."
"For these very reasons I'll none of him!"
"For these reasons, I want nothing to do with him!"
"Then that leaves Philip?"
"Does that mean Philip?"
Cleone whirled about.
Cleone spun around.
"Whom I would not marry were he the last man in the world!"
"Who I wouldn't marry even if he were the last man on Earth!"
"Luckily he is not. Don't be so violent, my dear."
"Fortunately, he isn't. Don't be so aggressive, darling."
Cleone stood for a moment, irresolute. Then she burst into tears and ran out of the room.
Cleone hesitated for a moment, unsure of what to do. Then she broke down in tears and dashed out of the room.
Lady Malmerstoke leaned back against the cushions and closed her eyes.
Lady Malmerstoke leaned back against the cushions and shut her eyes.
"There's hope for you yet, Philip," she remarked, and prepared to go to sleep. It was not to be. Barely five minutes later Sir Maurice was ushered into the room.
"There's still hope for you, Philip," she said, getting ready to sleep. That wasn't going to happen. Just five minutes later, Sir Maurice was brought into the room.
Her ladyship sat up, a hand to her wig.
Her ladyship sat up, one hand on her wig.
"Really, Maurice, you should know better than to take a woman unawares!" she said severely. "Your family has been in and out the house all the morning. What's the matter now?"
"Seriously, Maurice, you should know better than to catch a woman off guard!" she said sharply. "Your family has been coming in and out of the house all morning. What's going on now?"
Sir Maurice kissed her hand.
Sir Maurice kissed her hand.
"First, my heartiest congratulations, Sarah! I have just seen Tom."
"First off, huge congratulations, Sarah! I just saw Tom."
If a lady could grin, Sarah Malmerstoke grinned then.
If a woman could smile, Sarah Malmerstoke smiled then.
"Thank you, Maurice. And how did you find Tom?"
"Thanks, Maurice. So, what did you think of Tom?"
"Quite incoherent," said Sir Maurice. "He has talked a deal of nonsense about love-passions belonging only to the young, but I never saw a man so madly elated in my life."
"Totally incoherent," said Sir Maurice. "He's rambled on about how love and passion are only for the young, but I've never seen a guy so wildly happy in my life."
"How nice!" sighed my lady blissfully. "And what's your second point?"
"How nice!" my lady sighed happily. "And what's your second point?"
Sir Maurice walked to the fire and stared into it.
Sir Maurice walked over to the fire and gazed into it.
"Sally, it's Cleone."
"Sally, it's Cleone."
"Dear me! What's to do?"
"OMG! What should I do?"
"If anyone can help me, it's you," he began.
"If anyone can help me, it's you," he said.
Her ladyship held up her hands.
She raised her hands.
"No, Maurice, no! You're too old!"
"No, Maurice, no! You're too old!"
"You ridiculous woman!" He smiled a little. "Does she care for Philip, or does she not?"
"You silly woman!" He smiled slightly. "Does she care about Philip, or doesn't she?"
"Well"—my lady bit her finger—"I've been asking her that question, or one like it, myself."
"Well," my lady nibbled her finger, "I've been asking her that question, or something similar, myself."
"What did she say?"
"What did she say?"
"That she wouldn't marry him were he the last man in the world."
"She wouldn’t marry him even if he were the last man on earth."
Sir Maurice looked at her wretchedly.
Sir Maurice looked at her miserably.
"What's come over her? I thought—She said nothing more?"
"What's gotten into her? I wondered—She didn't say anything else?"
"Not a word. She burst into tears and fled."
"Not a word. She broke down in tears and ran away."
His face brightened.
His face lit up.
"Surely that augurs well for him?"
"That has to be a good sign for him, right?"
"Very well," nodded my lady. "But—"
"Okay," my lady nodded. "But—"
"But what? Tell me, Sally!"
"But what? Tell me, Sal!"
"You're very anxious," she observed.
"You're really anxious," she observed.
"Of course I am anxious! I tell you Philip is head over ears in love with the child! And she—"
"Of course I’m anxious! I’m telling you, Philip is completely in love with her! And she—"
"And she," finished her ladyship deliberately, "will need a deal of convincing that it is so. We are told that Philip is in love with Ann Nutley. We know that Philip trifled elegantly with various French ladies. We see him being kind to little Jennifer. And so on."
"And she," her ladyship concluded thoughtfully, "will need a lot of convincing that it's true. We hear that Philip is in love with Ann Nutley. We know that Philip casually flirted with several French ladies. We see him being nice to little Jennifer. And so on."
"But he means nothing! You know that!"
"But he doesn't mean anything! You know that!"
"I? Does it matter what I know? It is what Cleone knows, but there's naught under the sun so unreasonable as a maid in love."
"I? Does it even matter what I know? It's what Cleone knows, but there's nothing under the sun as unreasonable as a girl in love."
"But if Philip assures her—"
"But if Philip reassures her—"
"Pho!" said her ladyship, and snapped her fingers. "Pho!"
"Pho!" her ladyship exclaimed, snapping her fingers. "Pho!"
"She wouldn't believe it?"
"She can't believe it?"
"She might. But she might not choose to show it."
"She might. But she might not want to show it."
"But it's ridiculous! It's—"
"But it's absurd! It's—"
"Of course. All girls are ridiculous."
"Of course. All girls are silly."
"Sally, don't be tiresome! What's to be done?"
"Sally, stop being annoying! What should we do?"
"Leave 'em alone," counselled her ladyship. "There's no good to be got out of interfering. Philip must play his own game."
"Leave them alone," advised her ladyship. "There's no benefit in getting involved. Philip has to play his own game."
"He intends to. But he does not know whether she loves him or not!"
"He wants to. But he doesn't know if she loves him or not!"
"You can tell him from me that there is hope, but that he must go carefully. And now I'm going to sleep. Good bye, Maurice."
"You can let him know from me that there’s hope, but he needs to proceed with caution. And now I'm off to sleep. Bye, Maurice."
Sixteen16
Mistress Cleone Finds There Is No Safety in NumbersMistress Cleone Discovers That There Is No Safety in Numbers
When Philip entered the ballroom of my lady Dering's house, on Wednesday evening, Lady Malmerstoke had already arrived. Cleone was dancing with Sir Deryk; Jennifer was sitting beside her ladyship, looking very shy and very bewildered. As soon as he could do so, Philip made his way to that end of the room.
When Philip walked into the ballroom at Lady Dering's house on Wednesday evening, Lady Malmerstoke was already there. Cleone was dancing with Sir Deryk; Jennifer was sitting next to her ladyship, looking really shy and confused. As soon as he could, Philip headed over to that side of the room.
Lady Malmerstoke welcomed him with a laugh.
Lady Malmerstoke greeted him with a laugh.
"Good even, Philip! Have you brought your papa?"
"Good evening, Philip! Did you bring your dad?"
Philip shook his head.
Philip shook his head.
"He preferred to go to White's with Tom. Jenny, you'll dance with me, will you not? Remember, you promised!"
"He liked going to White's with Tom. Jenny, will you dance with me? You remember you promised!"
Jennifer raised her eyes.
Jennifer looked up.
"I—I doubt I—cannot. I—I have danced so few times, sir."
"I—I don't think I can. I—I have danced so few times, sir."
"Don't tell me those little feet cannot dance, chérie!"
"Don't tell me those little feet can't dance, chérie!"
Jennifer glanced down at them.
Jennifer looked down at them.
"It's monstrous kind of you, Philip—but—but are you sure you want to lead me out?"
"It's incredibly kind of you, Philip—but—are you sure you want to take me out?"
Philip offered her his arm.
Philip offered her his arm.
"I see you are in a very teasing mood, Jenny," he scolded.
"I see you're in a really playful mood, Jenny," he scolded.
Jennifer rose.
Jennifer got up.
"Well, I will—but—oh, I am very nervous! I expect you dance so well."
"Okay, I will—but—oh, I’m really nervous! I bet you dance so well."
"I don't think I do, but I am sure you under-rate your dancing. Let us essay each other!"
"I don't think I do, but I'm sure you underestimate your dancing. Let's give it a try!"
From across the room Cleone saw them. She promptly looked away, but contrived, nevertheless, to keep an eye on their movements. She saw Philip presently lead Jenny to a chair and sit talking to her. Then he hailed a passing friend and presented him to Jennifer. Cleone watched him walk across the room to a knot of men. He returned to Jennifer with several of them. Unreasoning anger shook Cleone. Why did Philip care what happened to Jennifer? Why was he so assiduous in his attentions? She told herself she was an ill-natured cat, but she was still angry. From Jennifer Philip went to Ann Nutley.
From across the room, Cleone spotted them. She quickly looked away but still managed to keep an eye on what they were doing. She saw Philip lead Jenny to a chair and start chatting with her. Then he called over a friend who passed by and introduced him to Jennifer. Cleone watched him walk over to a group of men. He came back to Jennifer with several of them. Unexplained anger coursed through Cleone. Why did Philip care about what happened to Jennifer? Why was he so attentive to her? She told herself she was being unreasonable, but she was still furious. After Jennifer, Philip went to Ann Nutley.
Sir Deryk stopped fanning Cleone.
Sir Deryk stopped cooling Cleone.
"There he goes! I declare, Philip Jettan makes love to every pretty woman he meets! Just look at them!"
"There he goes! Honestly, Philip Jettan flirts with every attractive woman he encounters! Just look at them!"
Cleone was looking. Her little teeth were tightly clenched.
Cleone was watching. Her small teeth were tightly clenched.
"Mr. Jettan is a flatterer," she said.
"Mr. Jettan is a sycophant," she said.
"Always so abominably French, too. Mistress Ann seems amused. I believe Jettan is a great favourite with the ladies of Paris."
"Always so incredibly French, too. Mistress Ann seems entertained. I think Jettan is a big favorite with the women of Paris."
Suddenly Cleone remembered that duel that Philip had fought "over the fair name of some French maid."
Suddenly, Cleone remembered that duel Philip had fought "over the good name of some French maid."
"Yes?" she said carelessly. "Of course, he is very handsome."
"Yeah?" she said nonchalantly. "Of course, he's really good-looking."
"Do you think so? Oh, here he comes! Evidently the lovely Ann does not satisfy him.... Your servant, sir!"
"Do you really think so? Oh, here he comes! Clearly the beautiful Ann doesn’t meet his needs.... Your servant, sir!"
Philip smiled and bowed.
Philip smiled and nodded.
"Mademoiselle, may I have the honour of leading you out?" he asked.
"Mademoiselle, may I have the honor of taking you out?" he asked.
Above all, she must not show Philip that she cared what he did.
Above all, she couldn't let Philip see that she cared about what he did.
"Oh, I have but this instant sat down!" she said. "I protest I am fatigued and very hot!"
"Oh, I've just sat down!" she said. "I swear, I'm exhausted and really hot!"
"I know of a cool withdrawing-room," said Brenderby at once. "Let me take you to it, fairest!"
"I know of a great lounge," said Brenderby immediately. "Let me take you there, beautiful!"
"It's very kind, Sir Deryk, but I do not think I will go. If I might have a glass of ratafia?" she added plaintively, looking at Philip.
"It's very kind of you, Sir Deryk, but I don't think I'll go. Could I have a glass of ratafia?" she added, looking at Philip with a sad expression.
For once he was backward in responding. Sir Deryk bowed.
For once, he was slow to respond. Sir Deryk bowed.
"At once, dear lady! I go to procure it!"
"Right away, ma'am! I'm going to get it!"
"Oh, thank you, sir!" This was not what Cleone wanted at all. "Well, Mr. Jettan, you have not yet fled to Paris?"
"Oh, thank you, sir!" This was not what Cleone wanted at all. "So, Mr. Jettan, you haven't run off to Paris yet?"
Philip sat down beside her.
Philip sat down next to her.
"No, mademoiselle, not yet. To-night will decide whether I go or stay." His voice was rather stern.
"No, miss, not yet. Tonight will determine if I leave or stay." His voice was quite firm.
"Indeed? How vastly exciting!"
"Really? How exciting!"
"Is it not! I am going to ask you a plain question, Cleone. Will you marry me?"
"Is it not! I'm going to ask you a straightforward question, Cleone. Will you marry me?"
Cleone gasped in amazement. Unreasoning fury shook her. That Philip should dare to come to her straight from the smiles of Ann Nutley! She glanced at him. He was quite solemn. Could it be that he mocked her? She forced herself to speak lightly.
Cleone gasped in shock. Uncontrollable anger shook her. How could Philip come to her right after being with Ann Nutley? She looked at him. He seemed completely serious. Was he mocking her? She made herself speak casually.
"I can hardly suppose that you are serious, sir!"
"I can hardly believe that you're serious, sir!"
"I am in earnest, Cleone, never more so. We have played at cross-purposes long enough."
"I’m serious, Cleone, more than ever. We’ve been working against each other for too long."
His voice sent a thrill through her. Almost he was the Philip of Little Fittledean. Cleone forced herself to remember that he was not.
His voice sent a shiver down her spine. It was almost like he was the Philip from Little Fittledean. Cleone reminded herself that he wasn't.
"Cross-purposes, sir? I fail to understand you!"
"Cross-purposes, sir? I don't get what you mean!"
"Yes? Have you ever been honest with me, Cleone?"
"Yeah? Have you ever been truthful with me, Cleone?"
"Have you ever been honest with me, Mr. Jettan?" she said sharply.
"Have you ever been honest with me, Mr. Jettan?" she asked pointedly.
"Yes, Cleone. Before you sent me away I was honest with you. When I came back, no. I wished to see whether you wanted me as I was, or as I pretended to be. You foiled me. Now I am again honest with you. I say that I love you, and I want you to be my wife."
"Yes, Cleone. Before you sent me away, I was truthful with you. When I returned, I wasn't. I wanted to see if you loved me for who I really am or for the person I was pretending to be. You caught me off guard. Now, I'm being honest with you again. I love you, and I want you to be my wife."
"You say that you love me...." Cleone tapped her fan on her knee. "Perhaps you will continue to be honest with me, sir. Am I the only one you have loved?"
"You say that you love me...." Cleone tapped her fan on her knee. "Maybe you will keep being honest with me, sir. Am I the only one you've loved?"
"You are the only one."
"You're the only one."
The blue eyes flashed.
The blue eyes glimmered.
"And what of the ladies of the French Court, Mr. Jettan? What of a certain duel you fought with a French husband? You can explain that, no doubt?"
"And what about the ladies of the French Court, Mr. Jettan? What about that duel you had with a French husband? You can explain that, right?"
Philip was silent for a moment, frowning.
Philip was quiet for a moment, frowning.
"So the news of that absurd affair reached you, Cleone?"
"So, you heard about that ridiculous situation, Cleone?"
She laughed, clenching her teeth.
She laughed, gritting her teeth.
"Oh, yes, sir! It reached me. A pity, was it not?"
"Oh, yes, sir! I got it. What a shame, right?"
"A great pity, Cleone, if on that gossip you judge me."
"A real shame, Cleone, if you judge me based on that gossip."
"Ah! There was no truth in the tale?" Suppressed eagerness was in her voice.
"Ah! Was there no truth in the story?" Her voice was filled with restrained excitement.
"I will be frank with you. A certain measure of truth there was. M. de Foli-Martin thought himself injured. It was not so."
"I'll be honest with you. There was some truth to it. M. de Foli-Martin thought he was wronged. That's not the case."
"And why should he think so, sir?"
"And why would he think that, sir?"
"Presumably because I paid court to madame, his wife."
"Probably because I showed interest in madame, his wife."
"Yes?" Cleone spoke gently, dangerously. "You paid court to madame. No doubt she was very lovely?"
"Yes?" Cleone said softly, almost threateningly. "You flirted with the lady. I assume she was very beautiful?"
"Very." Philip was nettled.
"Very." Philip was annoyed.
"As lovely, perhaps, as Mademoiselle de Marcherand, of whom I have heard, or as Mistress Ann Nutley yonder? Or as lovely as Jennifer?"
"As beautiful, maybe, as Mademoiselle de Marcherand, whom I've heard about, or as Mistress Ann Nutley over there? Or as beautiful as Jennifer?"
Philip took a false step.
Philip made a mistake.
"Cleone, surely you are not jealous of little Jenny?" he cried.
"Cleone, you can't possibly be jealous of little Jenny?" he exclaimed.
She drew herself up.
She stood tall.
"Jealous? What right have I to be jealous? You are nothing to me, Mr. Jettan! I confess that once I—liked you. You have changed since then. You cannot deny that you have made love to a score of beautiful women since you left home. I do not blame you for that. You are free to do as you please. What I will not support is that you should come to me with your proposal, having shown me during the time that you have spent in England that I am no more to you than Ann Nutley, or Julie de Marcherand. 'To the Pearl that Trembles in her Ear,' was it not? Very pretty, sir. And now I intrigue you for the moment. I cannot consider myself flattered, Mr. Jettan."
"Jealous? What right do I have to be jealous? You mean nothing to me, Mr. Jettan! I admit that I once—liked you. You've changed since then. You can’t deny that you’ve flirted with a bunch of beautiful women since you left home. I don't blame you for that. You’re free to do whatever you want. What I won’t accept is that you come to me with your proposal after showing me during your time in England that I mean no more to you than Ann Nutley or Julie de Marcherand. 'To the Pearl that Trembles in her Ear,' was it? Very charming, sir. And now I pique your interest for a moment. I can’t say I feel flattered, Mr. Jettan."
Philip had grown pale under his paint.
Philip had become pale under his makeup.
"Cleone, you wrong me! It is true that I have trifled harmlessly with those ladies. It is the fashion—the fashion you bade me follow. There has never been aught serious betwixt any woman and me. That I swear!"
"Cleone, you’re mistaken! It’s true that I’ve played around harmlessly with those ladies. It’s just the trend—the trend you told me to follow. There has never been anything serious between any woman and me. I swear!"
"You probably swore the same to M. de Foli-Martin?"
"You probably promised the same to M. de Foli-Martin?"
"When I had given him the satisfaction he craved, yes."
"When I had given him the satisfaction he wanted, yes."
"I suppose he believed you?"
"I guess he believed you?"
"No." Philip bit his lip.
"No." Philip bit his lip.
"No? Then will you tell me, sir, how it is that you expect me to believe what M. de Foli-Martin—closely concerned—would not believe?"
"No? Then can you explain to me, sir, how you expect me to believe something that M. de Foli-Martin—who is directly involved—would not believe?"
Philip looked straight into her eyes.
Philip looked directly into her eyes.
"I can only give you my word, Cleone."
"I can only promise you this, Cleone."
Still she fought on, wishing to be defeated.
Still, she kept fighting, hoping to be defeated.
"So you have never trifled with any of these women, sir?"
"So you've never messed around with any of these women, right?"
Philip was silent again.
Philip was quiet again.
"You bring me"—Cleone's voice trembled—"a tarnished reputation. I've no mind to it, sir. You have made love to a dozen other women. Perhaps you have kissed them. And—and now you offer me—your kisses! I like unspoilt wares, sir."
"You bring me"—Cleone's voice shook—"a ruined reputation. I want no part of it, sir. You've been with a dozen other women. Maybe you've even kissed them. And now you offer me—your kisses! I prefer untouched goods, sir."
Philip rose, very stiff and stern.
Philip stood up, looking very rigid and serious.
"I am sorry that you consider yourself insulted by my offer, Cleone."
"I'm sorry that you feel insulted by my offer, Cleone."
Her hand half flew towards him and fell again. Couldn't he understand that she wanted him to beat down her resistance? Did he care no more than that? If only he would deny everything and master her!
Her hand half reached out to him and then dropped back. Couldn't he see that she wanted him to break through her defenses? Did he really not care more than that? If only he would reject everything and take control of her!
"I hasten to relieve you of my obnoxious presence. Your servant, mademoiselle." Philip bowed. He turned on his heel and walked away, leaving Cleone stricken.
"I quickly want to get out of your way. Your servant, mademoiselle." Philip bowed. He turned on his heel and walked away, leaving Cleone upset.
Her fan dropped unheeded to the ground. Philip had gone! He had not understood that she wanted to be overruled, overcome. He had gone, and he would never come back. In those few minutes he had been the Philip she loved, not the flippant gallant of the past weeks. Tears came into Cleone's eyes. Why, why had he been so provoking? And oh, why had she let him go? She knew now beyond question that he was the only man she could ever love, or had ever loved. Now he had left her, and would go back to Paris. Nothing mattered, she did not care what became of her once she had lost Philip.
Her fan fell to the ground without anyone noticing. Philip was gone! He hadn’t realized that she wanted him to take charge, to overwhelm her. He was gone, and he would never return. In those few minutes, he had been the Philip she loved, not the carefree flirt he had been in the past weeks. Tears filled Cleone's eyes. Why, why had he been so infuriating? And oh, why had she let him leave? She now knew without a doubt that he was the only man she could ever love, or had ever loved. Now he had left her and would go back to Paris. Nothing mattered; she didn't care what happened to her now that she had lost Philip.
James Winton, never far away, came to her side and sat down. Cleone greeted him mechanically and proceeded to follow out her own line of dismal thought. Through a haze of misery she heard James' voice. It sounded rather shy, and very anxious. She had not the faintest idea of what he was saying, but she felt vaguely annoyed by his persistency. Presently these words filtered through to her brain:
James Winton, always nearby, came over and sat down next to her. Cleone greeted him absentmindedly and continued to dwell on her own gloomy thoughts. Through a fog of sadness, she heard James' voice. It sounded somewhat shy and very worried. She had no clue what he was saying, but she felt a nagging irritation at his insistence. Eventually, these words broke through to her consciousness:
"Say yes, Cleone! Say yes! Oh, say yes, Cleone!"
"Say yes, Cleone! Just say yes! Please, say yes, Cleone!"
How importunate he was! Cleone turned impatiently.
How annoying he was! Cleone turned away in irritation.
"Oh, yes, yes! What is it?"
"Oh, yes, yes! What’s going on?"
As James had been blurting out a carefully-worded proposal of marriage, he was not flattered by this answer. He rose, hurt to the bottom of his youthful soul.
As James was nervously proposing marriage, he didn't appreciate this response. He stood up, deeply hurt.
"It is evident that you have not heard a word of what I said, Cleone!"
"It’s clear that you didn’t hear anything I said, Cleone!"
"Oh, don't worry me, James! I've said yes. What is it? You are so persistent, and I wish to be quiet!"
"Oh, please don’t stress me out, James! I’ve said yes. What is it? You’re so persistent, and I just want some peace!"
James bowed.
James bent down.
"I will leave you, madam. I offered you my hand and my heart." With that he walked off, a picture of outraged dignity.
"I'll be leaving you now, ma'am. I offered you my hand and my heart." With that, he walked away, embodying outraged dignity.
Cleone broke into hysterical laughter. Up came Sir Deryk.
Cleone erupted into hysterical laughter. Sir Deryk approached.
"You seem vastly entertained, lady fair. May I share the pleasantry?"
"You look really entertained, my lady. Can I join in on the fun?"
Cleone sprang up.
Cleone jumped up.
"Take me away from this!" she begged. "I—I am nigh fainting from the heat! I—oh, I must be quiet! The fiddling goes through and through my head. I—oh, take me somewhere cool!"
"Get me out of here!" she pleaded. "I—I can barely stand this heat! I—oh, I need to calm down! The music is ringing in my ears. I—oh, please take me somewhere cooler!"
Sir Deryk was surprised, but he did not show it.
Sir Deryk was surprised, but he didn’t let it show.
"Why, of course, dearest! I know of a small withdrawing-room nearby. Take my arm, it's stifling in here!" He led her across the room to where a heavy curtain hung, shutting off a small, dimly-lighted apartment.
"Of course, my dear! I know a small lounge nearby. Take my arm; it’s stuffy in here!" He guided her across the room to where a heavy curtain was drawn, separating a small, dimly-lit space.
Meanwhile Philip had gone to Lady Malmerstoke's side. He sat down, frowning gloomily.
Meanwhile, Philip had gone to Lady Malmerstoke's side. He sat down, looking very unhappy.
Her ladyship eyed him speculatively.
She studied him thoughtfully.
"Well?" she demanded.
"Well?" she asked.
Philip laughed bitterly.
Philip scoffed.
"Oh, I have been rebuffed! Do I conceal it so admirably?"
"Oh, I've been turned down! Am I hiding it so well?"
"No, you do not," said her ladyship. "You must have played your cards monstrously badly. Trust a man."
"No, you don't," said her ladyship. "You must have played your cards really poorly. Trust a man."
"Oh, no! Tis merely that your niece does not love me."
"Oh, no! It's just that your niece doesn't love me."
"Fiddle! Don't tell me that. D'you think I'm a fool, Philip?"
"Come on! Don't say that. Do you think I'm an idiot, Philip?"
"She objects, madam, to my—tarnished reputation. She was quite final."
"She's upset, ma'am, about my—damaged reputation. She was very firm."
"You thought she was quite final. Now, don't be stately, child! What happened?"
"You thought she was totally done. Now, don’t be so serious, kid! What happened?"
"I asked her to marry me—and she flung my wretched Paris affaires in my face."
"I asked her to marry me—and she threw my pathetic Paris affaires back at me."
"Of course, you denied everything?"
"Of course, you denied it all?"
"No, I did not. How could I? There was a certain measure of tr—"
"No, I didn’t. How could I? There was a certain level of tr—"
Lady Malmerstoke leaned back disgustedly.
Lady Malmerstoke leaned back in disgust.
"God preserve me from young men! You admitted it?"
"God save me from young guys! You really said that?"
"No—that is, I was frank with her."
"No—I was truthful with her."
"Great heavens, Philip! Frank with a woman? God help you, then! And what next? Did you tell Cleone not to be a fool? Did you insist that she should listen to you?"
"Good heavens, Philip! Frank with a woman? Good luck with that! And what now? Did you tell Cleone not to be an idiot? Did you make sure she listened to you?"
"How could I? She—"
"How could I? She—"
"You didn't. You walked off when you should have mastered her. I'll wager my best necklet she was waiting for you to assert yourself. And now she's probably miserable. Serve her right, and you too."
"You didn’t. You walked away when you should have taken charge. I bet my best necklace she was waiting for you to step up. And now she’s probably unhappy. She deserves it, and so do you."
"But, Lady Malmerstoke—"
"But, Lady Malmerstoke—"
"Not but what I don't sympathise with the child," continued her ladyship inexorably. "Of course, she is a fool, but so are all girls. A woman of my age don't inquire too closely into a man's past—we've learned wisdom. Cleone knows that you have trifled with a dozen other women. Bless you, she don't think the worse of you for that!"
"Not that I don't feel for the girl," her ladyship continued firmly. "Sure, she’s a bit silly, but really, all girls are. A woman my age doesn’t dig too deep into a man’s past—we’ve gained some wisdom. Cleone knows you’ve messed around with a dozen other women. Trust me, she doesn’t think any less of you for that!"
"She does! She said—"
"She does! She said—"
"For goodness' sake, don't try to tell me what she said, Philip! What's that to do with it?"
"For goodness' sake, don't try to tell me what she said, Philip! What does that have to do with anything?"
"But you don't understand! Cleone said—"
"But you don't get it!" Cleone said—
"So she may have. That does not mean that she meant it, does it?" asked her ladyship in great scorn.
"So she might have. That doesn't mean she meant it, does it?" her ladyship asked with great disdain.
"Mais—"
"But—"
"Don't start talking French at me, child, for I can't bear it! You should know by now that no woman means what she says when it's to a man."
"Don't start speaking French to me, kid, because I can't handle it! You should know by now that no woman really means what she says when she's talking to a man."
"Oh, stop, stop! Lady Malmerstoke, you don't understand! Cleone does think the worse of me for those intrigues! She is very angry!"
"Oh, stop, stop! Lady Malmerstoke, you don't get it! Cleone really does think less of me for those affairs! She is really upset!"
"Of course she is. What do you expect?"
"Of course she is. What do you think?"
Philip clasped his head.
Philip held his head.
"Mais, voyons! Just now you said that she does not think the worse of me for it!"
"But, come on! Just now you said that she does not think less of me for it!"
"Who said she did? Can't one think two things at the same time?"
"Who said she did? Can't someone think two things at once?"
"But surely not two such—such contradictory things! I have never done so in my life!"
"But there can't be two things that are so contradictory! I've never done anything like that in my life!"
"You! You're only a man! You've not our gifts! I can tell you!" My lady spread out her fan. "Why, a woman can think of a hundred different things at once, all of them contradictory!" She nodded at him complacently.
"You! You're just a man! You don't have our talents! I can assure you!" My lady opened her fan. "Well, a woman can think of a hundred different things at the same time, and they're all contradictory!" She nodded at him with satisfaction.
"It's ridiculous! It's impossible! Are women's brains so—so incoherent?"
"It's ridiculous! It's impossible! Are women's brains really that—so disorganized?"
"Most of 'em," answered her ladyship. "They jump, you see."
"Most of them," her ladyship replied. "They jump, you know."
"Jump?" Philip was thoroughly bewildered.
"Jump?" Philip was completely confused.
"Jump. From one thing to another. You'll arrive at a new thought by degrees, and you'll know how you got there. Women don't think like that. Cleone could not tell you why she thinks well and ill of you at once, but she does."
"Jump. From one thing to another. You'll gradually reach a new thought, and you'll understand how you got there. Women don't think that way. Cleone can't explain why she has mixed feelings about you, but she does."
"But surely if she reasons with herself she'll see how absurd—"
"But surely if she thinks about it, she'll see how ridiculous—"
"If she what?"
"If she did what?"
"Reasons. I mean—"
"Reasons, like—"
"You're mad," said Lady Malmerstoke with conviction. "Women don't reason. That's a man's part. Why, do you suppose that if Cleone thought as you think, and had a brain like a man's, you'd be in love with her? Of course you'd not. You'd not be able to feel your superiority over her. Don't tell me!"
"You're crazy," Lady Malmerstoke said firmly. "Women don't think logically. That's what men do. Do you really think that if Cleone thought like you and had a brain like a man’s, you'd be in love with her? Of course you wouldn't. You wouldn't be able to feel superior to her. Don't even try to convince me!"
"I don't feel—"
"I don't feel like—"
Her ladyship chuckled.
She laughed.
"Oh, don't you, Philip? You think that Clo is reasonable-minded, and able to care for herself, needing no master?"
"Oh, don't you, Philip? You think that Clo is level-headed and can take care of herself without needing a master?"
"I—no, I don't!"
"I—no, I don't!"
"That's what I say. Goodness me, how blind you are! If you didn't consider that you had to care for Cleone and guard her from everyone else and herself, you wouldn't love her. Now don't be foolish!"
"That's what I'm saying. Wow, how oblivious you are! If you didn't realize that you had to look after Cleone and protect her from everyone else and even herself, you wouldn't love her. Now, don't be silly!"
Philip laughed ruefully.
Philip laughed wryly.
"You're a fount of wisdom, Lady Sally!"
"You're a source of wisdom, Lady Sally!"
"Well, I should be at my age. I've had experience, you see, and I never was a fool."
"Well, I guess I should be at my age. I've got experience, you know, and I was never an idiot."
"Then—tell me what I am to do?"
"Then—tell me what should I do?"
Lady Malmerstoke wagged an impressive finger at him.
Lady Malmerstoke waved an impressive finger at him.
"Take that girl and shake her. Tell her you'll not be flouted. Tell her she's a little fool, and kiss her. And if she protests, go on kissing her. Dear me, what things I do say!"
"Take that girl and shake her. Tell her you won’t be disrespected. Tell her she’s acting like a little fool, and kiss her. And if she protests, just keep kissing her. Wow, what things I say!"
"Yes, but, dear Lady Sally, how am I to kiss her when she's as cold as ice—and—and so unapproachable?"
"Yes, but, dear Lady Sally, how am I supposed to kiss her when she’s as cold as ice—and—and so unapproachable?"
"And why is she cold?" said her ladyship. "Tell me that!"
"And why is she so distant?" said her ladyship. "Tell me that!"
"Because she—thinks me naught but an elegant trifler!"
"Because she thinks I'm nothing but a classy tease!"
"Not a bit of it. Because you treat her gently and politely, and let her flout you. God bless my soul, women don't want gentle politeness! Not Cleone, at all events! They like a man to be brutal!"
"Not at all. Because you treat her softly and respectfully, and let her disrespect you. Honestly, women don’t want gentle politeness! Not Cleone, that’s for sure! They want a man to be rough!"
"Brutal?"
"Harsh?"
"Well, not exactly. They like to feel he'll stand no airs and graces. Oh, they want gentleness, never fear! But they want to feel helpless. They want mastering, most of 'em. When you kiss the tips of Clo's fingers, and treat her as though you thought she was made o' porcelain, she thinks you're no man, and don't care for her."
"Well, not really. They like to believe he'll be straightforward and down-to-earth. Oh, they want kindness, for sure! But they want to feel powerless. Most of them want to be dominated. When you kiss the tips of Clo's fingers and treat her like she’s made of delicate china, she thinks you're not a real man and that you don't care for her."
"She cannot! She—"
"She can't! She—"
"She don't know it, of course, but it's true. Be advised by me, Philip, and insist on having your way with her. Don't be finicky!"
"She doesn't know it, of course, but it's true. Take my advice, Philip, and make sure you have your way with her. Don't be picky!"
"It's very well, but she doesn't love me!"
"It's fine, but she doesn't love me!"
"Oh, drat the man!" said her ladyship. "You fatigue me! Go your own road, but don't blame me when everything goes awry. If you have made Clo miserable she'll do something mad. And now I've warned you. Oh, here is James, looking like a sulky bear! James, my good boy, I've left my handkerchief in another room. Will you fetch it for me, please? Over there, behind the curtain. Yes, shocking, isn't it? But 'twas only old Fotheringham, so you can tell your uncle, Philip."
"Oh, for goodness' sake!" said her ladyship. "You’re exhausting! Go your own way, but don’t come crying to me when things go wrong. If you’ve made Clo unhappy, she might do something crazy. And now I’ve warned you. Oh, here comes James, looking like a grumpy bear! James, my dear, I left my handkerchief in the other room. Could you please get it for me? It’s over there, behind the curtain. Yes, it’s awful, isn’t it? But it was only old Fotheringham, so you can tell your uncle, Philip."
He rose and laughed down at her.
He stood up and laughed at her.
"And will he master you, my lady?"
"And will he control you, my lady?"
"Not he," said Lady Malmerstoke placidly. "I'm past the age of wanting that nonsense. Not that I ever wanted it, but I was always unusual. Be off with you!"
"Not him," Lady Malmerstoke said calmly. "I'm past the age of wanting that nonsense. Not that I ever wanted it, but I’ve always been a bit different. Go away!"
Philip took James by the arm.
Philip took James by the arm.
"We are summarily dismissed! Come, Jamie, we'll find her handkerchief, and she'll smile again."
"We've been kicked out! Come on, Jamie, let’s go find her handkerchief, and she’ll be happy again."
In the withdrawing-room Cleone was dicing with Sir Deryk. A very unmaidenly proceeding. She had just lost the rose at her breast to Brenderby, and he was trying to undo the pin that held it in place. Failing in that, he grasped the stem firmly, and broke off the bloom. But with the rose he had clutched a thin blue riband from which hung a locket. It snapped, and the trinket rolled on to the floor.
In the lounge, Cleone was playing dice with Sir Deryk. A rather inappropriate thing for a lady to do. She had just lost the rose pinned to her chest to Brenderby, and he was attempting to undo the pin that held it there. When that didn't work, he grasped the stem firmly and broke off the flower. But in the process, he accidentally grabbed a thin blue ribbon that held a locket as well. The ribbon snapped, and the locket rolled onto the floor.
Cleone was already overwrought. She sprang up.
Cleone was already stressed out. She jumped up.
"Oh, my locket!" And searched wildly on the floor.
"Oh, my locket!" And searched frantically on the floor.
Surprised at her earnestness, Brenderby went down on his knees, and presently retrieved the locket just as Cleone had seen it. He rose, and was about to present it to her when she clasped agitated hands and demanded that it should be given her at once! This aroused Sir Deryk's curiosity. He withheld it.
Surprised by her seriousness, Brenderby knelt down and soon found the locket exactly as Cleone had seen it. He stood up, ready to give it to her when she clasped her hands in agitation and insisted that she be given it immediately! This piqued Sir Deryk's curiosity. He held it back.
"Why so anxious, Cleone? What secret does it hide?"
"Why are you so anxious, Cleone? What secret are you keeping?"
"Naught! Oh, give it me, give it me!"
"Nah! Oh, give it to me, give it to me!"
Sir Deryk held fast to the trophy.
Sir Deryk held tightly to the trophy.
"Not so fast, Cleone! I'll swear there's some mystery here! I've a mind to peep inside!"
"Not so fast, Cleone! I swear there's something suspicious going on here! I feel like taking a look inside!"
"I forbid you!" said Cleone. "Sir Deryk—" She controlled herself. "Please give it me!"
"I forbid you!" Cleone said. "Sir Deryk—" She composed herself. "Please give it to me!"
"And so I will, fairest, but first I must see what is inside!"
"And so I will, beautiful, but first I need to see what's inside!"
"Oh, no, no! There's naught! I could not bear you to look! Besides, it's—it's empty. I—oh, give it me!" She stamped angrily.
"Oh, no, no! There's nothing! I can't stand you looking! Besides, it's—it's empty. I—oh, just give it to me!" She stamped her foot in frustration.
Brenderby's eyes were alight with impish laughter.
Brenderby's eyes sparkled with mischievous laughter.
"I'll make a bargain, sweetest! You shall play me for it." He picked up the dice-box. "If you beat my throw, I will give you the locket unopened. If you lose you shall pay a price for it."
"I'll make you a deal, darling! You can challenge me for it." He picked up the dice box. "If you beat my roll, I'll give you the locket sealed. If you lose, there will be a price to pay for it."
"I don't understand! What do you mean?"
"I don't get it! What are you talking about?"
"You shall kiss me for it. One hard-earned kiss. Come, you must admit my terms are generous!"
"You should give me a kiss for that. One well-deserved kiss. Come on, you have to agree that my offer is pretty generous!"
"I won't! How dare you, sir! And it is my locket! You have no right to it!"
"I won't! How dare you, sir! And it's my locket! You have no right to it!"
"What I find I keep! Come! The odds are equal, and in neither case do I open the locket."
"What I find, I keep! Come on! The odds are the same, and in neither case do I open the locket."
"I—I thought you a gentleman!"
"I thought you were a gentleman!"
"So I am, Clo. Were I not—I'd take the price and then the locket. There's no one to see, and no one need know. Cleone—you lovely creature!"
"So I am, Clo. If I weren't—I’d take the money and then the locket. There's no one around, and no one has to know. Cleone—you beautiful thing!"
Cleone wrung her hands.
Cleone nervously fidgeted.
"I should die of shame! Oh, Sir Deryk, please be kind!"
"I could die of embarrassment! Oh, Sir Deryk, please be nice!"
"Why should I be kind when you are not? You'll none of my terms? Very well!" He made as if to open the locket.
"Why should I be nice when you're not? You don't want my terms? Fine!" He acted like he was going to open the locket.
"No, no, no!" almost shrieked Cleone. "I'll do anything, anything! Only don't open it!"
"No, no, no!" Cleone almost shouted. "I'll do anything, anything! Just please don't open it!"
"You'll play me?"
"Are you going to play me?"
Cleone drew a deep breath.
Cleone took a deep breath.
"Yes. I will. And I'll never, never, never speak to you again!"
"Yes. I will. And I’ll never, ever speak to you again!"
He laughed.
He chuckled.
"Oh, I trust you'll change your mind! Now!" He cast the dice. "Aha! Can you beat that?"
"Oh, I trust you'll change your mind! Now!" He rolled the dice. "Aha! Can you top that?"
Cleone took the box in a firm clasp, and shook it long and violently. Her cheeks were burning, her eyes tight shut. She threw the dice. Brenderby bent over the table.
Cleone grabbed the box tightly and shook it hard and furiously. Her cheeks were flushed, and her eyes were squeezed shut. She rolled the dice. Brenderby leaned over the table.
"Alack!"
"Alas!"
Her eyes flew open.
Her eyes snapped open.
"I've won? Oh, I have won!"
"I won? Oh, I actually won!"
"No. I was grieving for you, fairest, not for myself. You have lost."
"No. I was mourning for you, dearest, not for myself. You have lost."
Tears glistened on the end of her long lashes.
Tears sparkled on the tips of her long lashes.
"Sir Deryk—p-please be gen-generous now! I don't want to—kiss you!"
"Sir Deryk—p-please be generous now! I don't want to—kiss you!"
"What! You cry off? Shame, Cleone!" he teased.
"What! You're backing out? Shame on you, Cleone!" he teased.
"You are monstrous unk-kind! It's my locket, and I d-don't want to kiss you! I don't, I don't! I hate you!"
"You are so cruel! It's my locket, and I don't want to kiss you! I really don't! I hate you!"
"That adds spice, my dear. Must I take the price?"
"That adds excitement, my dear. Do I have to pay the price?"
She choked down a sob.
She stifled a sob.
"Very well. Kiss me." She stood where she was, face upturned, with the resignation of a martyr.
"Alright. Kiss me." She stayed in place, her face lifted, with the acceptance of a martyr.
He laid his hands on her shoulders, looking down at her.
He placed his hands on her shoulders, looking down at her.
"By God, Cleone, you're damnably beautiful!" he said thickly. "You've played with fire to-night—but I won't burn you too much!" He bent his head till his lips met hers.
"By God, Cleone, you’re absolutely stunning!" he said hoarsely. "You've flirted with danger tonight—but I won’t hurt you too much!" He leaned down until his lips touched hers.
At that inauspicious moment James and Philip walked into the room.
At that unfortunate moment, James and Philip walked into the room.
"No, it was here she said, Philip. I re—"
"No, it was here she said, Philip. I re—"
With a cry of horror Cleone sprang away from Sir Deryk, her cheeks flaming. Her wide eyes went from James' face of frozen astonishment to Philip's pale, furious countenance.
With a scream of horror, Cleone jumped away from Sir Deryk, her cheeks burning. Her wide eyes darted from James' face, which was frozen in shock, to Philip's pale, angry expression.
Philip took a half-step forward, his hand wrenching at his sword-hilt. Then he checked and slammed the sword back into the scabbard. Cleone had not struggled in Brenderby's embrace. What could he do? He had always thought her in love with the fellow. And on the top of his own proposal.... He swept a magnificent bow.
Philip took a half step forward, his hand twisting the hilt of his sword. Then he paused and shoved the sword back into the scabbard. Cleone hadn't resisted in Brenderby's hold. What could he do? He had always believed she was in love with that guy. And on top of his own proposal... He executed a grand bow.
"Mille pardons, mademoiselle! It seems that I intrude."
"My apologies, miss! It looks like I'm intruding."
Cleone winced at the biting sarcasm in his voice. She tried to speak, and failed. What could she say?
Cleone flinched at the sharp sarcasm in his voice. She attempted to speak, but couldn't. What could she possibly say?
James came out of his stupor. He strode forward.
James snapped out of his daze. He walked forward confidently.
"What in thunder—"
"What the heck—"
"I don't kn-know!" quavered Cleone. "Oh—oh, heaven!"
"I don't know!" Cleone said nervously. "Oh—oh, my goodness!"
Quickly Brenderby stepped to her side. He took her hand in his, and gave it a reassuring squeeze.
Quickly, Brenderby moved to her side. He took her hand in his and gave it a reassuring squeeze.
"Gentlemen, you have the honour of addressing my affianced wife," he said haughtily.
"Gentlemen, you have the honor of speaking to my fiancée," he said arrogantly.
Philip's hand was on the curtain. It clenched slowly. He stood very still, his eyes on Cleone's face.
Philip's hand was on the curtain. It slowly tightened. He stood completely still, his eyes on Cleone's face.
"Oh!" cried Cleone. "Oh, I—" She stopped helplessly. Heavens, what a position she was in! If she denied that she was betrothed to Brenderby, what could Philip think? What must he think? He had seen her in Sir Deryk's arms; the only excuse was a betrothal. And she had accused Philip of loose behaviour! Whatever happened, he must not think her a light woman! But, oh! how could she say she was betrothed to another when she desired nothing better than to fly to him for protection? She compromised.
"Oh!" Cleone exclaimed. "Oh, I—" She paused, feeling helpless. What a terrible situation she was in! If she denied being engaged to Brenderby, what would Philip think? What could he possibly think? He had seen her in Sir Deryk's arms; the only explanation was an engagement. And she had accused Philip of being immoral! No matter what happened, he must not see her as irresponsible! But, oh! How could she claim to be engaged to someone else when all she wanted was to run to him for safety? She was caught in a dilemma.
"I—oh, I think I am about—to faint!" she said.
"I—oh, I think I'm about to faint!" she said.
Sir Deryk drew her hand through his arm.
Sir Deryk linked his arm with hers.
"No, no, my love! Tell these gentlemen that it is as I say."
"No, no, my love! Tell these guys that I'm right."
Cleone looked at Philip. Was he sneering? She couldn't bear it.
Cleone looked at Philip. Was he mocking her? She couldn't stand it.
"Yes," she said. "It is."
"Yes," she replied. "It is."
Philip seemed to stiffen. He bowed again.
Philip seemed to tense up. He bowed again.
"Permit me to offer my felicitations," he said, but his voice was not quite steady.
"Let me congratulate you," he said, but his voice was a bit shaky.
James hurried forward, furious.
James rushed ahead, angry.
"Your pardon, sir! I beg leave to contradict that statement!"
"Excuse me, sir! I ask for the chance to disagree with that statement!"
They all stared at him in amazement. Philip eyed him through his quizzing-glass.
They all stared at him in shock. Philip watched him through his monocle.
"I—beg—your—pardon?" drawled Brenderby.
"I—beg—your—pardon?" drawled Brenderby.
"I am betrothed to her myself!" shouted James.
"I’m engaged to her myself!" shouted James.
Cleone's hands flew to her cheeks.
Cleone's hands shot up to her cheeks.
"Oh!" she fluttered. "Oh—oh, I am going to faint!"
"Oh!" she exclaimed. "Oh—oh, I am going to pass out!"
Brenderby's eyes twinkled.
Brenderby's eyes sparkled.
"Bear up a little longer, dear! Of course, I know there is no truth in what Mr. Winton says!"
"Hang in there a little longer, dear! I definitely know there’s no truth in what Mr. Winton says!"
"It is true!" James danced in his fury. "Cleone promised to wed me, only a little while back! You can't deny it, Clo! You did!"
"It’s true!" James exclaimed, dancing in his anger. "Cleone promised to marry me just a little while ago! You can’t deny it, Clo! You did!"
"I did not!"
"I didn't!"
"You did! You said yes! You know you did!"
"You did! You said yes! You know you did!"
Cleone leaned on the nearest thing to her for support. It chanced to be Sir Deryk, but she was past caring.
Cleone leaned on the closest thing for support. It happened to be Sir Deryk, but she didn't care anymore.
"James, you know I—never meant it!"
"James, you know I never meant it!"
Suddenly Philip's lips twitched. Brenderby was bubbling over with ill-suppressed merriment.
Suddenly, Philip's lips twitched. Brenderby was overflowing with barely contained laughter.
"My dear, this is most serious! Did you, indeed, accept Mr. Winton's proposal?"
"My dear, this is very serious! Did you actually accept Mr. Winton's proposal?"
"Yes, but he knows I did not mean it! I—"
"Yeah, but he knows I didn’t mean it! I—"
"Cleone, do you tell me you accepted him and—"
"Cleone, are you saying you accepted him and—"
"Yes, she did! And I hold her to her promise!"
"Yeah, she did! And I'm holding her to her promise!"
Cleone's knees threatened to give way.
Cleone's knees felt like they were about to buckle.
"James, I can't marry you! I won't marry you!"
"James, I can't marry you! I'm not going to marry you!"
"I hold you to your promise!" repeated James, almost beside himself.
"I expect you to keep your promise!" James repeated, almost losing his mind.
"And I." Sir Deryk passed his arm round Cleone's waist. "I hold Cleone to the promise she has given me!"
"And I." Sir Deryk wrapped his arm around Cleone's waist. "I hold Cleone to the promise she made to me!"
Philip interposed.
Philip interjected.
"Probably the lady would be glad of a chair," he suggested evenly. "James, Brenderby—let your future wife sit down!"
"She'd probably appreciate a chair," he suggested calmly. "James, Brenderby—let your future wife sit down!"
Sir Deryk's shoulders shook. He led Cleone to the couch, and she sank on to it, hiding her face.
Sir Deryk's shoulders trembled. He guided Cleone to the couch, and she collapsed onto it, hiding her face.
Philip swung the curtain aside.
Philip drew back the curtain.
"Permit me to withdraw. Decidedly I am de trop. Mademoiselle, messieurs!" He went out, and the curtain fell back into place.
"Allow me to leave. Truly, I am de trop. Miss, gentlemen!" He exited, and the curtain dropped back into place.
"Oh, oh, oh!" moaned Cleone.
"Oh, oh, oh!" groaned Cleone.
James bent over her.
James leaned over her.
"Come, Clo! Let me take you back to your aunt!"
"Come on, Clo! Let me take you back to your aunt!"
Brenderby stepped to Cleone's other side.
Brenderby moved to the other side of Cleone.
"Cleone needs no other escort than that of her affianced husband, sir!"
"Cleone doesn't need any other escort besides her fiancé, sir!"
"And that is I!"
"And that's me!"
"On the contrary, it is I! Cleone, sweet, come!"
"On the other hand, it's me! Cleone, my dear, come!"
Cleone sprang up.
Cleone jumped up.
"It's neither of you! Don't—touch me! Oh, that I should be so humiliated! I will not marry you, James! You know that I never heard what you said!"
"It's neither of you! Don't—touch me! Oh, how humiliated I am! I will not marry you, James! You know I never heard what you said!"
James set his chin stubbornly.
James set his jaw stubbornly.
"I'll not release you from your promise," he said.
"I won't let you break your promise," he said.
"And nor will I." Sir Deryk was enjoying himself.
"And I won't either." Sir Deryk was having a great time.
"You must release me, James!" cried Cleone. "I—I am going to wed—Sir Deryk!" She dissolved into tears. "Oh, what shall I do? What shall I do? How—how dreadful it is! Let me go! I hate you both!" She fled from them and was at her aunt's side before either had time to follow her.
"You have to let me go, James!" Cleone shouted. "I—I’m going to marry—Sir Deryk!" She broke down in tears. "Oh, what am I going to do? What am I going to do? How—how terrible this is! Let me go! I can't stand either of you!" She ran from them and was at her aunt's side before either of them could catch up.
"Good gracious, child, what's amiss?" exclaimed Lady Malmerstoke. "You're as white as my wig!"
"Good grief, kid, what's wrong?" Lady Malmerstoke exclaimed. "You're as pale as my wig!"
"Take me home!" begged Cleone. "I am b-betrothed to Sir Deryk and James! Oh, for heaven's sake, take me home!"
"Take me home!" Cleone pleaded. "I’m engaged to Sir Deryk and James! Oh, for goodness' sake, take me home!"
SeventeenSeventeen
Mistress Cleone at Her Wits' EndMistress Cleone at Her Breaking Point
Sir Maurice and his brother were sitting at breakfast next morning when Philip burst in on them. Tom jumped up and swore.
Sir Maurice and his brother were having breakfast the next morning when Philip suddenly walked in on them. Tom jumped up and cursed.
"Damn you, Philip! At this hour!"
"Damn you, Philip! At this time!"
Philip paid not the slightest heed to him. He grasped his father by the shoulder.
Philip didn’t pay him any attention at all. He grabbed his father by the shoulder.
"Father, you must to Lady Malmerstoke's house at once!"
"Father, you need to go to Lady Malmerstoke's house right away!"
Sir Maurice ate another mouthful of beef.
Sir Maurice took another bite of beef.
"Sit down, my son, and be calm. What's to do?"
"Sit down, my son, and relax. What's going on?"
"God alone knows!" cried Philip. He sank into a chair and rejected his uncle's offer of breakfast. "Breakfast? What have I to do with food when I'm nigh demented?"
"Only God knows!" Philip exclaimed. He collapsed into a chair and turned down his uncle's offer of breakfast. "Breakfast? What do I care about food when I'm almost losing my mind?"
"Drink's the thing," agreed Tom placidly. He pushed a tankard of ale towards his nephew. "What ails you, lad?"
"Drinking is what matters," Tom agreed calmly. He slid a tankard of ale toward his nephew. "What's bothering you, kid?"
"Cleone's betrothed to Brenderby," announced Philip wretchedly.
"Cleone is engaged to Brenderby," Philip announced miserably.
"No!" Tom was dumbfounded.
"No!" Tom was shocked.
"And to Winton." Philip sought to drown his troubles in the tankard.
"And to Winton." Philip tried to drown his troubles in the mug.
"What!" Sir Maurice dropped his knife. "Betrothed to Brenderby and Winton? You're raving!"
"What!" Sir Maurice dropped his knife. "Engaged to Brenderby and Winton? You're insane!"
"Would to God I were!" Philip emerged from the tankard, and wiped his lips with his fathers napkin. "I asked her to marry me at the ball last night. She refused; I won't tell you her exact words. Half an hour later I found her kissing ce scélérat Brenderby in a secluded corner!" He laughed savagely.
"Wish I were!" Philip came up from the tankard and wiped his lips with his dad's napkin. "I asked her to marry me at the ball last night. She said no; I won't tell you exactly what she said. Half an hour later, I caught her kissing that scoundrel Brenderby in a hidden corner!" He laughed harshly.
"You mean that Brenderby kissed her?" suggested Tom.
"You mean Brenderby kissed her?" Tom suggested.
"No, I do not! Voyons, would he be alive now had he dared embrace Cleone against her will? She submitted—she wished it!"
"No, I don't! Come on, would he be alive now if he had dared to embrace Cleone against her will? She went along with it—she wanted it!"
"I'll not believe that!" exclaimed Sir Maurice.
"I can't believe that!" exclaimed Sir Maurice.
"You must believe it. She is betrothed to him. She said it herself. James was with me. He interposed, saying that she was already promised to him."
"You have to believe it. She’s engaged to him. She said it herself. James was with me. He stepped in, saying that she was already promised to him."
Tom gave a chuckle.
Tom laughed.
"Faith, the child is rich in—" He caught Philips eye and subsided. "Oh, ay, ay! Go on."
"Faith, the kid has a lot of—" He caught Philip's eye and stopped. "Oh, yeah, yeah! Keep going."
"I know no more. I deemed it time for me to withdraw."
"I don't know anything else. I thought it was time for me to step back."
"The proper thing to have done," said Tom solemnly, "was to have struck an attitude and said, 'Not so! The girl is mine!'"
"The right thing to do," Tom said seriously, "would have been to stand up and say, 'No way! The girl is mine!'"
"What right had I? I was not amongst the favoured ones."
"What right did I have? I wasn't one of the favored ones."
"Don't sneer, Philip," interposed Sir Maurice. "There must be something behind all this."
"Don't scoff, Philip," Sir Maurice interjected. "There has to be a reason for all of this."
Philip turned to him.
Philip turned to him.
"That's what I hope and trust! You must go at once to Lady Malmerstoke's!" His head sank into his hands and he gave way to a gust of laughter. "Oh, Gad! neither would give way an inch. Both held Clo to her promise!"
"That's what I hope and trust! You need to go to Lady Malmerstoke's right away!" He put his head in his hands and burst out laughing. "Oh man! Neither of them would budge an inch. Both held Clo to her promise!"
"Ye seem monstrous light-hearted about it," said his uncle.
"You seem really carefree about it," said his uncle.
Philip sprang up.
Philip jumped up.
"Because I thought that—for one moment—she looked at me for help!"
"Because I thought that—for a brief moment—she looked at me for help!"
"Which you declined to give?" asked Sir Maurice dryly.
"Which you refused to provide?" asked Sir Maurice dryly.
"Mon cher père, I have my own game to play. Now go to Lady Malmerstoke's, I implore you!"
"Dear father, I have my own game to play. Now please go to Lady Malmerstoke's!"
Sir Maurice rose.
Sir Maurice stood up.
"I'll go at once. What madness can have seized Cleone?"
"I'll go right away. What kind of craziness has taken over Cleone?"
Philip almost pushed him out of the room.
Philip nearly shoved him out of the room.
"That is what I want to know. Quickly, Father!"
"That's what I want to know. Come on, Dad!"
The little black page swung open the door of my lady's boudoir.
The little black page opened the door to my lady's private room.
"Sah Maurice Jettan!"
"Sah Maurice Jettan!"
"The very man I wish to see!" exclaimed Lady Malmerstoke. "Maurry, never were you more opportune!"
"The very person I wanted to see!" exclaimed Lady Malmerstoke. "Maurry, you couldn't have arrived at a better time!"
Sir Maurice kissed her hand with punctilious politeness. He then smiled at Cleone, who stood by the table, pale and wan-looking.
Sir Maurice kissed her hand with precise politeness. He then smiled at Cleone, who stood by the table, looking pale and weary.
"I hope I see you well, Cleone?"
"I hope you’re doing well, Cleone?"
"Very well, thank you, sir," said Cleone dully.
"Sure, thanks, sir," said Cleone flatly.
Lady Malmerstoke sat down.
Lady Malmerstoke took a seat.
"Clo has disgraced me," she said comfortably. "Is it not exciting?"
"Clo has embarrassed me," she said casually. "Isn't it thrilling?"
Cleone turned her head away. Sir Maurice saw her lips tremble.
Cleone turned her head away. Sir Maurice noticed her lips quivering.
"Please, Aunt—please don't—don't—I shall wed—Sir Deryk."
"Please, Aunt—don't—don't—I’m going to marry—Sir Deryk."
"And what's to happen to t'other? You can't wed two men, my dear. I'm not sure that I shall consent to your marrying either."
"And what's going to happen to the other one? You can't marry two men, my dear. I'm not sure I can agree to you marrying either."
"Sir Deryk—has my word."
"Sir Deryk—has my word."
"But so has James."
"But so has James."
"What's this?" Sir Maurice spoke with well-feigned astonishment. "Cleone, you are not betrothed, surely?"
"What's going on?" Sir Maurice said with feigned surprise. "Cleone, you can't possibly be engaged, right?"
"To two men," nodded her aunt. "I have never been so amused in my life. I always considered myself to be flighty, but I'll swear I never was engaged to two men at one and the same time!"
"To two guys," her aunt nodded. "I've never been so entertained in my life. I always thought I was a bit scatterbrained, but I swear I was never engaged to two guys at the same time!"
Cleone sat down, staring out of the window and biting her lips.
Cleone sat down, gazing out the window and nibbling on her lips.
"What!" cried Sir Maurice in liveliest horror. "Engaged to two men? Cleone!"
"What!" exclaimed Sir Maurice in utter shock. "Engaged to two men? Cleone!"
The golden head was bowed. A great sob shook Cleone.
The golden head was lowered. A deep sob shook Cleone.
"But—good heavens, my dear! This is dreadful! How could such a thing have come to pass?"
"But—oh my gosh, my dear! This is terrible! How could this happen?"
"Of course it's dreadful," said her ladyship. "Think of the scandal when it is known. And that'll be soon, I'll wager. Brenderby will never keep such a piece of spice to himself." As she spoke, one of her eyelids flickered. Sir Maurice smiled, unseen by Cleone.
"Of course it's terrible," said her ladyship. "Just think about the scandal when it gets out. And that’ll happen soon, I bet. Brenderby won’t be able to keep such a juicy secret to himself." As she spoke, one of her eyelids twitched. Sir Maurice smiled, not visible to Cleone.
"You—forget, Aunt. I am going to—wed—Sir Deryk." A shudder ran through her at the thought.
"You—forget it, Aunt. I'm going to marry—Sir Deryk." A shiver went through her at the thought.
"But I don't understand! Tell me how it happened, Cleone!"
"But I don't get it! Tell me how it happened, Cleone!"
"Yes, tell him, Clo. Mayhap he can help you."
"Yes, tell him, Clo. Maybe he can help you."
"No one can help me," said Cleone miserably. "I must bear the pain of my own folly. I—oh, I have been so wicked!"
"No one can help me," Cleone said sadly. "I have to deal with the consequences of my own mistakes. I—oh, I've been so terrible!"
"Now, Cleone? Why? What happened?"
"Now, Cleone? Why? What’s wrong?"
"I may as well tell you. It will be all over town by to-night—everyone will know me for a flirtatious, flighty woman. I—"
"I might as well tell you. It'll be all over town by tonight—everyone will see me as a flirty, superficial woman. I—"
"You won't have a shred of reputation left," said her aunt maliciously.
"You won't have any reputation left," her aunt said with a smirk.
Cleone started.
Cleone began.
"Rep—Oh, and I said—!"
"Rep—Oh, and I said—!"
"Said what, my love?"
"What did you say, love?"
"Naught. I—I—oh, Sir Maurice, Sir Maurice, I am so unhappy!" Cleone burst into tears.
"Nothings. I—I—oh, Sir Maurice, Sir Maurice, I'm so unhappy!" Cleone burst into tears.
Sir Maurice patted one heaving shoulder.
Sir Maurice patted one heavy shoulder.
"There, there, Cleone! Tell me all about it!"
"There, there, Cleone! Spill the details!"
"It—it was at the ball last n-night. I—I—no, first James proposed—to me, and I said yes, but I didn't mean it!"
"It—it was at the ball last n-night. I—I—no, first James proposed—to me, and I said yes, but I didn't mean it!"
"You said yes, but you didn't mean it?"
"You said yes, but you didn't really mean it?"
"I didn't hear what he said—I—I said yes because he worried so! And—and he knew I didn't mean it, for he walked away. Then I—I—went with Sir Deryk to a room apart—"
"I didn't catch what he said—I—I just said yes because he was so worried! And—and he knew I didn't mean it, because he walked away. Then I—I—went with Sir Deryk to a separate room—"
"Cle-one!"
"Clear one!"
"Oh, I know, I know! It was terrible of me, but I was so upset—I hardly cared what I did!"
"Oh, I get it, I get it! I was awful, but I was so upset—I barely cared about anything I did!"
"But why were you upset? Because James had proposed?"
"But why were you upset? Was it because James had proposed?"
"No—I—I—something—else—I can't tell you! Anyway—Sir Deryk took me to this room, and—and taught me to—to dice—yes, I know it was horrid! And—and I lost my rose to him, and when he—was taking it, he broke the string of my locket, and he wouldn't give it me, but said he must see what was inside, and I couldn't let him! I couldn't!"
"No—I—I—something—else—I can't tell you! Anyway—Sir Deryk took me to this room, and—and taught me to—to play dice—yes, I know it was horrible! And—and I lost my rose to him, and when he—was taking it, he broke the string of my locket, and he wouldn't give it back to me, but said he must see what was inside, and I couldn't let him! I couldn't!"
"What was inside?" asked Sir Maurice.
"What was inside?" Sir Maurice asked.
"For heaven's sake, don't ask her that!" begged Lady Malmerstoke. "It sets her off into floods of tears!"
"For heaven's sake, don't ask her that!" pleaded Lady Malmerstoke. "It makes her burst into tears!"
"Aunt, please! And—and so I played him—for it—and I lost and had to—to kiss him—for it. Don't, don't look at me! And then—and then he came—with James—and saw! What he must think of me! And I said that he—Oh, he must—"
"Aunt, please! So I played him for it—and I lost and had to kiss him for it. Don't, don't look at me! And then he came with James and saw! What must he think of me! And I said that he—Oh, he must—"
"Who is 'he'?" asked Sir Maurice innocently. He watched a tell-tale blush steal up under Cleone's fingers.
"Who is 'he'?" asked Sir Maurice innocently. He watched a revealing blush creep up under Cleone's fingers.
"Mr.—Mr. Jettan—I—he—saw me kiss—Sir Deryk! Then—then—I think, to spare me—Sir Deryk said I was his betrothed wife. I could not say I was not, could I? It was too dreadful! And Phil—Mr. Jettan congratulated us! But James suddenly said he was going to marry me because I had said yes to him—by mistake! Of course I said I was not, but he wouldn't release me from my word, and nor would Sir Deryk! Then—then he—Ph—I mean Mr. Jettan—just bowed and went away, but I could see what he—thought of—of me. Oh, what shall I do? Neither will let me go! I am betrothed to two gentlemen, and—oh, what shall I do?"
"Mr.—Mr. Jettan—I—he—saw me kiss—Sir Deryk! Then—then—I think, to spare me—Sir Deryk said I was his fiancée. I couldn't say I wasn't, could I? It was too awful! And Phil—Mr. Jettan congratulated us! But James suddenly said he was going to marry me because I had said yes to him—by mistake! Of course, I said I wasn’t, but he wouldn’t let me back out of my word, and nor would Sir Deryk! Then—then he—Ph—I mean Mr. Jettan—just bowed and walked away, but I could see what he—thought of—of me. Oh, what am I going to do? Neither will let me go! I am engaged to two gentlemen, and—oh, what am I going to do?"
Sir Maurice took a pinch of snuff. A smile hovered about his mouth. He shut the box with a snap.
Sir Maurice took a pinch of snuff. A smile lingered at his lips. He closed the box with a snap.
"It seems, my dear, that the situation calls for a third gentleman," he said, and picked up his hat.
"It looks like, my dear, we need a third guy," he said, grabbing his hat.
Cleone sprang to her feet.
Cleone jumped up.
"Oh—oh, what are you going to do?" she cried.
"Oh—oh, what are you going to do?" she exclaimed.
Sir Maurice walked to the door.
Sir Maurice walked to the door.
"It needs a masterful hand to extricate you from your delicate position," he said. "I go in search of such a hand."
"It takes a skilled person to get you out of your tricky situation," he said. "I'm looking for that kind of person."
Cleone ran to him, clasping his arm.
Cleone ran to him, grabbing his arm.
"No, no, no! Oh, for heaven's sake, Sir Maurice, stop!"
"No, no, no! Oh, for goodness' sake, Sir Maurice, stop!"
He laid a hand over her clutching fingers.
He placed his hand over her tightly clenched fingers.
"My dear, do you want a scandal?"
"My dear, do you want some drama?"
"No, oh no! But I must persuade James!"
"No, oh no! But I have to convince James!"
"And do you want to marry this Brenderby?"
"And do you want to marry this Brenderby?"
"I—am going to marry him."
"I'm going to marry him."
"Cleone, answer me! Do you want to marry him?"
"Cleone, answer me! Do you want to marry him?"
"I don't want to marry anyone! I wish I were dead!"
"I don't want to marry anyone! I wish I were dead!"
"Well, child, you are not dead. I refuse to see you fall into Brenderby's clutches, and I refuse to countenance the scandal that would arise if you rejected him. I am too old to serve you, but I know of one who is not."
"Well, kid, you’re not dead. I won’t let you fall into Brenderby’s hands, and I won’t stand for the scandal that would happen if you turned him down. I’m too old to help you, but I know someone who isn’t."
"Sir Maurice, I implore you, do not speak to him! You don't understand! You—Oh, stop, stop!"
"Sir Maurice, please, don’t talk to him! You don’t get it! You—Oh, just stop!"
Sir Maurice had disengaged himself. He opened the door.
Sir Maurice had freed himself. He opened the door.
"You need not fear that the third gentleman will cause you any annoyance, my dear. I can vouch for his discretion."
"You don’t have to worry that the third guy will bother you, my dear. I can guarantee he’ll be discreet."
Cleone tried to hold him back.
Cleone tried to stop him.
"Sir Maurice, you don't understand! You must not ask Ph—your son to—to—help me! I—I didn't tell you all! I—Oh, come back!"
"Sir Maurice, you don’t get it! You can’t ask Ph—your son—to—to—help me! I—I didn’t tell you everything! I—Oh, come back!"
The door closed behind Sir Maurice.
The door shut behind Sir Maurice.
"A very prompt, wise man," commented Lady Malmerstoke. "Now I am to be baulked of the scandal. Hey-dey!"
"A very quick, smart man," said Lady Malmerstoke. "Now I'm going to miss out on the scandal. Oh dear!"
Cleone paced to and fro.
Cleone paced back and forth.
"I can't face him! I can't, I can't! What must he think of me? What must he think? Aunt, you don't know all!"
"I can't face him! I can't, I can't! What must he think of me? What must he think? Aunt, you have no idea!"
"Oh, yes, I do," retorted her ladyship.
"Oh, yes, I do," her ladyship shot back.
"No, no, you do not! Philip asked me to marry him—and—I refused! I—I—told him—I would not marry a man with a tarnished reputation! I—I said that—and worse! I accused him of trifling and—and—oh, it's too awful! That he should have been the one to see! How he must scorn me. Oh, Aunt, Aunt, can't you say something?"
"No, no, you really don’t! Philip asked me to marry him—and—I turned him down! I—I—told him—I wouldn’t marry a man with a bad reputation! I—I said that—and more! I blamed him for playing around and—and—oh, it’s too terrible! He should have been the one to notice! How he must look down on me. Oh, Aunt, Aunt, can’t you say something?"
"Ay, one thing. That you will have to be very humble to Master Philip. At least, he was never betrothed twice in one night."
"Yeah, one thing. You'll need to be really humble around Master Philip. At least he was never engaged twice in one night."
Cleone collapsed on to the couch.
Cleone flopped onto the couch.
"I'll not see him! I—oh, I must go home at once! I must, I must! Everything is all my fault! I ought never to have—sent him away! And now—and now he despises me!"
"I won’t see him! I—oh, I need to go home right now! I have to, I have to! Everything is my fault! I should never have—sent him away! And now—and now he looks down on me!"
"Who says so?"
"Who says that?"
"I—how could he do else? Don't—don't you realise how dreadful I have been? And—and his face—when—when he—heard everything! He'll never never believe—the truth!"
"I—how could he do anything different? Don't—don't you see how terrible I've been? And—and his expression—when—when he—heard everything! He'll never ever believe—the truth!"
"What matters it?" asked my lady carelessly. "Since you do not love him—"
"What does it matter?" my lady asked casually. "Since you don't love him—"
"Oh, I do, I do, I do!" wept Cleone.
"Oh, I do, I do, I do!" cried Cleone.
François admitted Sir Maurice. His round face was perturbed. It cleared somewhat at the sight of Sir Maurice.
François let Sir Maurice in. His round face looked worried but relaxed a bit when he saw Sir Maurice.
"Ah, m'sieur, entrez donc! M'sieur Philippe he is like one mad!—He rage, he go up and down the room like a caged beast! It is a woman, without doubt it is a woman! I have known it depuis longtemps! Something terrible has happened! M'sieur is hors de lui-même!"
"Ah, mister, come in! Mister Philippe is acting like a crazy person!—He’s pacing back and forth in the room like a trapped animal! It’s definitely a woman, no doubt about it! I've known it for a long time! Something awful has happened! Mister is beside himself!"
Sir Maurice laughed.
Sir Maurice chuckled.
"Poor François! I go to reassure m'sieur."
"Poor François! I’m going to reassure him."
"Ah, if m'sieur can do that!"
"Ah, if you can do that!"
"I can—most effectively. Where is he?"
"I can do that—very effectively. Where is he?"
François pointed to the library door.
François pointed to the library door.
Philip literally pounced on his father.
Philip literally jumped on his father.
"Well? You have seen her? Is she in love with Brenderby? Is she to wed him? What did she tell you?"
"Well? Have you seen her? Is she in love with Brenderby? Is she going to marry him? What did she say to you?"
Sir Maurice pushed him away.
Sir Maurice shoved him aside.
"You are the second distracted lover who has clutched me to-day. Have done."
"You’re the second distracted lover who has grabbed hold of me today. Enough already."
Philip danced with impatience.
Philip danced eagerly.
"But speak, Father! Speak!"
"But talk, Dad! Talk!"
Sir Maurice sat down leisurely and crossed his legs.
Sir Maurice sat down comfortably and crossed his legs.
"At the present moment Cleone is betrothed. Very much so," he added, chuckling. "I am about to put the whole matter into your hands."
"Right now, Cleone is engaged. Very much so," he added with a laugh. "I'm going to hand the whole situation over to you."
"My hands? She wants my help?"
"My hands? She wants my help?"
"Not at all. She is insistent that you shall not be appealed to. In fact, she was almost frantic when I suggested it."
"Not at all. She is adamant that you should not be approached. In fact, she was nearly frantic when I brought it up."
"Then does she not want to marry Brenderby?"
"Then she doesn't want to marry Brenderby?"
"Certainly not. But she will do if you fail to intervene."
"Definitely not. But she'll be fine if you don't step in."
Philip flung out his hands.
Philip threw out his hands.
"But tell me, sir! What happened last night?"
"But tell me, sir! What happened last night?"
"Sit down and be quiet," said Sir Maurice severely. "I am on the point of telling you."
"Sit down and be quiet," Sir Maurice said firmly. "I'm about to tell you."
Philip obeyed meekly.
Philip complied quietly.
"And don't interrupt." Sir Maurice proceeded to relate all that he had heard from Cleone.... "And she was so upset that she went with Brenderby, not caring what happened. That is the whole story," he ended.
"And don't interrupt." Sir Maurice went on to share everything he had heard from Cleone.... "She was so upset that she went with Brenderby, not caring about the consequences. That’s the whole story," he concluded.
"Upset? But—was she upset—because I had offered and been rejected?"
"Upset? But—was she upset—because I had made an offer and was turned down?"
"Presumably. Now she is so hopelessly compromised that she daren't face you."
"Probably. Now she's in such a tough situation that she can't even face you."
Philip sank his head into his hands and gave way to a long peal of laughter.
Philip buried his face in his hands and burst into a long fit of laughter.
"Sacré nom de Dieu, the tables are turned, indeed. Oh, Clo, Clo, you wicked little hussy! And what was in that locket?"
"Holy name of God, the tables have turned, indeed. Oh, Clo, Clo, you wicked little minx! And what was in that locket?"
"That you will have to ask her yourself," answered Sir Maurice.
"You're going to have to ask her yourself," replied Sir Maurice.
Philip jumped up.
Philip stood up.
"And I shall. Mordieu, never did I dream of such a solution to my difficulties!"
"And I will. Mordieu, I never expected such a solution to my problems!"
"Perhaps she still will not have you, Philip," warned Sir Maurice.
"Maybe she still won't want you, Philip," warned Sir Maurice.
Philip flung back his head.
Philip tossed his head back.
"Thunder of God, she will have me now if I have to force her to the altar! Ciel, you have taken a load off my mind, sir! I thought she cared for Brenderby! She smiled on him so consistently. And now for ce cher Brenderby! I am going to enjoy myself."
"God's thunder, she'll be mine now even if I have to drag her to the altar! Ciel, you've really relieved me, man! I thought she was into Brenderby! She smiled at him so much. And now for my dear Brenderby! I’m going to have a great time."
"Remember, Philip! No breath of scandal!"
"Remember, Philip! No hint of scandal!"
"Am I so clumsy? Not a whisper shall there be! François, François! My hat, my cloak, my boots, and my SWORD!"
"Am I really that clumsy? Not a word about it! François, François! My hat, my cloak, my boots, and my SWORD!"
EighteenEighteen
Philip Takes Charge of the SituationPhilip Takes Control of the Situation
Sir Deryk's valet came to him, bowing.
Sir Deryk's valet approached him, bowing.
"There is a gentleman below who desires speech with you, sir."
"There’s a man downstairs who wants to talk to you, sir."
"Oh? Who is he?"
"Oh? Who's he?"
"Mr. Philip Jettan, sir."
"Mr. Philip Jettan."
Sir Deryk raised his eyebrows.
Sir Deryk raised his brows.
"Jettan? What can he want with me? Ay, I'll come." He rose and went languidly downstairs. "This is an unexpected honour, Jettan! Come in!" He led Philip into a large room. "Is it a mere friendly visit?"
"Jettan? What does he want with me? Yeah, I’ll come." He got up and slowly made his way downstairs. "This is a surprising honor, Jettan! Come in!" He escorted Philip into a spacious room. "Is this just a friendly visit?"
"Anything but that," said Philip. "I have come to tell you that you will not be able to wed Mistress Cleone Charteris."
"Anything but that," Philip said. "I've come to tell you that you won't be able to marry Mistress Cleone Charteris."
"Oh?" Brenderby laughed. "Why do you say that?"
"Oh?" Brenderby laughed. "What makes you say that?"
"Because," Philip smiled a little, "I am going to wed her myself."
"Because," Philip smiled slightly, "I'm going to marry her myself."
"You? Oh, Gad, you make the third!"
"You? Oh my gosh, you're the third!"
"And there is, as you know, luck in odd numbers. Are you satisfied?"
"And there is, as you know, luck in odd numbers. Are you happy?"
"Satisfied? Damme, no! The girl's lovely! I've a mind to her."
"Satisfied? Hell no! The girl is beautiful! I’m really into her."
"Even though I tell you that she desires to be released?"
"Even though I’m telling you that she wants to be set free?"
"Even though she told it me herself!"
"Even though she told me that herself!"
"I trust you will allow me to persuade you?" Philip patted his sword-hilt lovingly.
"I trust you will let me persuade you?" Philip stroked his sword-hilt affectionately.
A light sprang to Brenderby's eyes.
A light sparked in Brenderby’s eyes.
"Is it a fight you're wanting? By Gad, no man has ever had need to challenge me twice! Here? Now? Help me push the table back!"
"Are you looking for a fight? I swear, no one has ever had to challenge me more than once! Here? Now? Help me move the table back!"
"One moment! You love a hazard, I think? I fight you for the right to wed Mistress Cleone. If I win you relinquish all claim upon her, and you swear never to breathe a word of what passed last night. If you win—oh, if you win, you do as you please!"
"Just a moment! You enjoy a challenge, don’t you? I challenge you for the chance to marry Mistress Cleone. If I win, you give up all claim to her and promise never to mention what happened last night. If you win—oh, if you win, you can do whatever you want!"
"Ay, aught you will! I've been pining for a fight for many a long day. You're a man after my heart, stap me if you're not! Here, wait while I fetch my sword!" He hurried out of the room, returning in a very short time with a rapier. "I've told my man that you have come to fence with me. But we'll lock the door in case of accidents. How does my sword measure with yours?"
"Yes, you will! I've been itching for a fight for a long time. You're just the person I want to spar with, no doubt about it! Hang on while I grab my sword!" He rushed out of the room and quickly came back with a rapier. "I told my guy that you’ve come to duel with me. But let’s lock the door just to be safe. How does my sword compare to yours?"
Philip compared them.
Philip compared them.
"Very well." His eyes danced suddenly. "Dieu! I never thought to fight so strange a duel!" He pulled off his boots. "We'll fight in wigs, yes? One is so displeasing without a hair to one's head."
"Alright." His eyes suddenly sparkled. "God! I never imagined I would fight such a strange duel!" He took off his boots. "We'll fight in wigs, right? It's so unappealing to be without hair on your head."
"A dozen, if you like!" Brenderby struggled out of his coat and vest. "You know, you are shorter than I am. We're not fair matched."
"A dozen, if you want!" Brenderby struggled out of his coat and vest. "You know, you're shorter than I am. We're not evenly matched."
Philip laughed, tucking up his ruffles.
Philip laughed, adjusting his collar.
"No matter. You see, I must win!"
"No worries. You see, I have to win!"
"Why?" Brenderby made an imaginary pass in the air.
"Why?" Brenderby gestured as if making a pass in the air.
"So much depends on it," explained Philip. "Is the light fair to both?"
"So much rides on it," Philip explained. "Is the light even for both?"
"Fair enough," said Brenderby.
"Fair enough," Brenderby said.
"You are ready, then? Eh bien!"
"You ready, then? Well then!"
The blades met and hissed together.
The blades clashed and hissed together.
Opening in quarte, Brenderby seemed at first to be the better of the two. Philip stayed on the defensive, parrying deftly and allowing Brenderby to expend his energies. Once Brenderby's blade flashed out and all but pinked Philip, but he managed to recover his opposition in time. His eyes opened wider; he became more cautious. Suddenly he descried an opening and lunged forward. There was a moment's scuffle, and Brenderby put the murderous point aside. Then Philip seemed to quicken. When Brenderby began to pant, Philip changed his tactics, and gave back thrust for thrust. His wrist was like flexible steel; his footwork was superb; the whole style of his fencing was different from that of Brenderby.
Opening in quarter, Brenderby initially appeared to have the upper hand. Philip played defensively, skillfully blocking and letting Brenderby use up his energy. At one point, Brenderby’s blade flashed out and nearly grazed Philip, but he managed to regain his stance just in time. His eyes widened; he became more careful. Suddenly, he spotted an opening and lunged forward. They briefly struggled, and Brenderby deflected the deadly point away. Then, Philip seemed to pick up the pace. As Brenderby started to breathe heavily, Philip switched up his strategy and responded to each thrust. His wrist felt like flexible steel; his footwork was excellent; his entire fencing style was different from Brenderby’s.
All at once Brenderby saw an opening. He thrust in quinte, steel scraped against steel, and Philip's point flashed into his right arm above the elbow.
All of a sudden, Brenderby saw an opening. He lunged with his weapon, steel clashing against steel, and Philip's blade pierced his right arm above the elbow.
Brenderby staggered back, clutched at his arm, and tried to raise his sword again. But Philip was at his side, supporting him.
Brenderby stumbled back, grabbed his arm, and tried to lift his sword once more. But Philip was right next to him, providing support.
"It's only a flesh wound—painful now—bien sûr. It will—heal quickly. I do not—mistake," he gasped.
"It's just a flesh wound—painful right now—of course. It will—heal quickly. I do not—misunderstand," he gasped.
"Damme—I'm not done for—yet!"
"Damn—I'm not done yet!"
"But yes! I fight—no more. You cannot—keep your blade—steady—now! Sit down!" He lowered Brenderby into a chair, and whisked out his handkerchief. He bound up Sir Deryk's wound and fetched him a glass of wine from a decanter on the sideboard.
"But yes! I fight—no more. You can't—keep your blade—steady—now! Sit down!" He eased Brenderby into a chair and pulled out his handkerchief. He wrapped up Sir Deryk's wound and got him a glass of wine from a decanter on the sideboard.
"Thanks!" Sir Deryk gulped it down. "But where are my manners? Pour some for yourself, Jettan! Gad, but you pinked me neatly!" He seemed to slip back into his habitual drawl. "As pretty a piece of sword-play as I wish to see. But you fence French-fashion."
"Thanks!" Sir Deryk said as he drank it down. "But what are my manners? Pour yourself some, Jettan! Wow, you really got me good!" He appeared to fall back into his usual accent. "That was some of the best swordplay I’ve seen. But you’re fencing in that French style."
Philip drank some wine.
Philip had some wine.
"Yes. It was at Paris that I learned. With Guillaume Corvoisier."
"Yes. I learned that in Paris. With Guillaume Corvoisier."
"No!" Brenderby heaved himself up. "Corvoisier, forsooth! No wonder you're so quick!"
"No!" Brenderby pulled himself up. "Corvoisier, seriously! No wonder you're so fast!"
Philip smiled and bowed.
Philip smiled and bowed.
"You frightened me more than once, sir."
"You scared me more than once, sir."
"Faith, it wasn't apparent then! You were so intent on winning?"
"Faith, it wasn't clear back then! You were so focused on winning?"
"It means so much, you see," said Philip simply. "My whole life's happiness."
"It means a lot, you see," Philip said honestly. "My entire happiness in life."
"What! You really intend to wed Cleone?"
"What! You actually plan to marry Cleone?"
Again Philip bowed.
Philip bowed again.
"I have always intended to wed her."
"I've always planned to marry her."
"You?" Brenderby stared. "I never knew that! What of that young sprig Winton?"
"You?" Brenderby looked shocked. "I had no idea! What about that young guy Winton?"
"Oh, I think I can persuade James!"
"Oh, I think I can convince James!"
"Like this?" Brenderby glanced down at his arm.
"Like this?" Brenderby looked down at his arm.
"No, not like that. Tell me, sir, did you intend to wed Mademoiselle?"
"No, not like that. Tell me, sir, did you plan to marry Mademoiselle?"
"Heaven forbid! I've no mind to tie myself up yet awhile. Your entrance last night forced me to say what I did to spare the lady's blushes. I'd no notion of continuing the comedy, until young Winton thrust in with his prior claim. Gad, but 'twas amusing! Did you not find it so?"
"Heaven forbid! I'm not ready to commit just yet. Your arrival last night made me say what I did to protect the lady's modesty. I had no intention of keeping up the act until young Winton barged in with his previous claim. Wow, it was hilarious! Didn't you think so?"
"I? No. But I was closely concerned in the affair, you see. I may take it that you will say naught of last night's work?"
"I? No. But I was closely involved in what happened, you see. Can I take it that you won't say anything about last night?"
"Of course not. 'Twas a mad jest, but I'd not let it go so far as to damage a lady's reputation. And you may tell Mistress Cleone that I apologise—for what happened before. She's too damnably beautiful."
"Of course not. It was a crazy joke, but I wouldn’t let it go so far as to hurt a lady’s reputation. And you can tell Mistress Cleone that I apologize—for what happened before. She’s just way too beautiful."
Philip worked himself into his coat.
Philip put on his jacket.
"'Damnably' is not the word I should employ, but n'importe." He sat down and started to pull on his boots. "I have enjoyed myself. I said I should."
"'Damnably' isn't the right word to use, but n'importe." He sat down and began putting on his boots. "I've had a great time. I said I would."
"Tare an' 'ouns, so have I! It's an age since I've had a sword in my hand. I am indebted to you, sir."
"Tare and 'ouns, so have I! It's been ages since I've held a sword in my hand. I'm grateful to you, sir."
"Yes, you are out of practice. I thank the kind fates for that!"
"Yeah, you’re a bit out of practice. I’m grateful to the kind fates for that!"
"Ay, I'd have kept you at it longer, but I don't know that the issue would have been different. You must go?"
"Ay, I would have had you continue for longer, but I’m not sure the outcome would have changed. Do you have to go?"
Philip picked up his hat.
Philip grabbed his hat.
"I must. I have to thank you for—"
"I must. I need to thank you for—"
"Oh, stuff! I'd no notion of holding Cleone to her promise, but I could not resist the offer of a fight. I wish you could see how monstrous amusing it was, though!"
"Oh, come on! I had no intention of holding Cleone to her promise, but I couldn't resist the chance to fight. I wish you could see how incredibly funny it was, though!"
Philip laughed.
Philip chuckled.
"Had it been anyone but Cleone I might have been able to appreciate the humour of the situation! I trust the wound will heal quickly."
"If it had been anyone other than Cleone, I might have found the situation funny! I hope the wound heals quickly."
"Oh, that's naught! A mere prick, but I was winded. Fare ye well, Jettan. My felicitations! You felicitated me last night, did you not?" He laughed.
"Oh, that's nothing! Just a little jab, but it took my breath away. Take care, Jettan. Congratulations! You congratulated me last night, didn't you?" He laughed.
"With black murder in my heart!" nodded Philip. "I do not say good bye, but au revoir!"
"With rage in my heart!" nodded Philip. "I don't say goodbye, but see you later!"
"Here's my hand on it then—my left hand, alack!"
"Here’s my hand on it then—my left hand, oh no!"
Philip grasped it. Brenderby accompanied him to the front door and waved to him as he ran down the steps.
Philip grabbed it. Brenderby walked with him to the front door and waved as he ran down the steps.
"Bonne chance, as you'd say yourself! Au 'voir!"
"Good luck, as you'd say yourself! Goodbye!"
Philip waved back at him and turned to hail a passing chair. He instructed the bearers to carry him to Jermyn Street.
Philip waved back at him and turned to signal a passing chair. He told the bearers to take him to Jermyn Street.
It seemed that the luck was indeed with him, for he arrived just as James was descending the steps of his house. Philip sprang out, paid the chairmen, and took Winton's arm.
It looked like luck was on his side because he showed up right when James was coming down the steps of his house. Philip jumped out, paid the chairmen, and took Winton's arm.
"My friend, a word with you!"
"My friend, I need to talk to you!"
"Yes?" said James. "You seem excited, Philip."
"Yeah?" said James. "You look excited, Philip."
"It's what I am, then. I've come to speak to you of Cleone."
"It's what I am, then. I've come to talk to you about Cleone."
James stiffened.
James tensed up.
"I'll not give her up to that fellow Brenderby!" he said fiercely. "It's more than flesh and blood can bear."
"I won't give her up to that guy Brenderby!" he said fiercely. "It's more than anyone can handle."
"Assuredly. But will you give her up to me?"
"Definitely. But will you let me have her?"
James turned to stare at him.
James turned to look at him.
"You? But she is to wed Brenderby!"
"You? But she's going to marry Brenderby!"
"Ah, but no! that is at an end. Brenderby releases her. He is not so bad a man as you think. En effet, I like him."
"Ah, but no! That’s over now. Brenderby lets her go. He’s not as bad a guy as you think. En effet, I like him."
"I loathe the sight of him, drawling fop!"
"I can't stand the sight of him, such a pretentious dandy!"
"To-day I have seen him in another light. But that is not what I have to say. Cleone does not wish to marry you, mon enfant, and it is churlish to persist."
"Today I saw him in a different way. But that's not what I want to talk about. Cleone doesn't want to marry you, mon enfant, and it's rude to keep pushing."
"I know she'll never marry me," answered James gloomily. "I only held her to her word because I thought she'd have Brenderby if I did not."
"I know she’ll never marry me," James replied, feeling down. "I only brought it up because I thought she’d go for Brenderby if I didn’t."
"I understand. You'll release her—for me?"
"I get it. You're going to let her go—for me?"
"I suppose so. Why did you say naught last night?"
"I guess so. Why didn’t you say anything last night?"
"There were reasons. They no longer exist. Come, Jamie, don't look so glum! You are young yet."
"There were reasons. They don't exist anymore. Come on, Jamie, don't look so sad! You're still young."
"It's easy to say that. Oh, I knew I never had a chance with her! I congratulate you, Philip."
"It's easy to say that. Oh, I knew I never had a chance with her! Congrats, Philip."
Philip pressed his arm.
Philip pressed his arm.
"My thanks. You're very generous! And now I must fly!"
"Thank you! You're so generous! Now I have to go!"
"Where? May I accompany you?"
"Where? Can I join you?"
"Again many thanks, but no! I have an engagement. Au revoir, mon cher!"
"Thanks again, but no! I have plans. Goodbye, my dear!"
NineteenNineteen
Philip Justifies His ChinPhilip Justifies His Jaw
Once more Lady Malmerstoke's page went up to the boudoir.
Once again, Lady Malmerstoke's page went up to the lounge.
"Mistah Philip Jettan is below, m'lady!"
"Mister Philip Jettan is downstairs, my lady!"
Up started Cleone.
Cleone got up.
"I will not see him! Aunt Sarah, I beg you will go to him! Please spare me this—humiliation!"
"I won't see him! Aunt Sarah, please go talk to him! Just save me from this—embarrassment!"
Lady Malmerstoke waved her aside.
Lady Malmerstoke waved her off.
"Admit him, Sambo. Yes, here. Cleone, control yourself!"
"Let him in, Sambo. Yes, right here. Cleone, calm down!"
"I can't see him! I can't! I can't! How can I face him?"
"I can't see him! I can't! I can't! How am I supposed to face him?"
"Turn your back, then," said her unsympathetic aunt. "I wonder what he has done?"
"Turn around, then," said her unfeeling aunt. "I wonder what he did?"
"D-do you think he—could have—arranged everything?" asked Cleone, with a gleam of hope.
"Do you think he could have arranged everything?" Cleone asked, her eyes shining with hope.
"From what I have seen of him, I should say yes. A masterful young man, my dear. Else why that chin?" She moved to the door. Philip came in, immaculate as ever. "Ah, Philip!"
"Based on what I've seen of him, I would say yes. A remarkable young man, my dear. Otherwise, why that chin?" She moved to the door. Philip walked in, looking sharp as always. "Ah, Philip!"
Philip shot a look past her. Cleone had fled to the window. He bent and kissed Lady Malmerstoke's hand.
Philip glanced past her. Cleone had dashed over to the window. He leaned down and kissed Lady Malmerstoke's hand.
"Bonjour, madame!" He held open the door and bowed.
"Hello, ma'am!" He held the door open and bowed.
Her ladyship laughed.
She laughed.
"What! Turning me from my own boudoir?"
"What! Kicking me out of my own bedroom?"
"If you please, madame."
"If you would, ma'am."
"Aunt—Sarah!" The whisper came from the window.
"Aunt—Sarah!" The whisper came from the window.
Philip smiled faintly.
Philip gave a faint smile.
"Madame...."
"Ma'am...."
"Oh, that chin!" said her ladyship, and patted it. She went out and Philip closed the door behind her.
"Oh, that chin!" her ladyship said, patting it. She left, and Philip closed the door after her.
Cleone's fingers clasped one another desperately. Her heart seemed to have jumped into her throat. It almost choked her. She dared not look round. She heard the rustle of Philip's coat-skirts. Never, never had she felt so ashamed, or so frightened.
Cleone's fingers clutched each other tightly. It felt like her heart had jumped into her throat. It almost made her choke. She couldn't bear to look around. She heard the swish of Philip's coat. Never, ever had she felt so embarrassed or so scared.
"Your devoted servant, mademoiselle!"
"Your loyal servant, mademoiselle!"
Cleone could not speak. She stood where she was, trembling uncontrollably.
Cleone couldn't speak. She stood there, shaking uncontrollably.
"I have the honour of informing you, mademoiselle, that you are released from your engagements."
"I am honored to inform you, miss, that you are released from your commitments."
Was there a note of laughter in the prim voice?
Was there a hint of laughter in that formal voice?
"I—thank you—sir," whispered Cleone. Her teeth clenched in an effort to keep back the tears. She was blinded by them, and her bosom was heaving.
"I—thank you—sir," whispered Cleone. Her teeth were clenched in an effort to hold back the tears. She was blinded by them, and her chest was heaving.
There was a slight pause. Why did he not go? Did he wish to see her still more humiliated?
There was a brief pause. Why didn't he leave? Did he want to see her even more embarrassed?
"I have also to offer, on Sir Deryk's behalf, his apologies for the happenings of last night, mademoiselle."
"I also want to extend Sir Deryk's apologies for what happened last night, miss."
"Th—thank—you, sir."
"Th—thank you, sir."
Again the nerve-killing silence. If only he would go before she broke down!
Again, the nerve-wracking silence. If only he would leave before she lost it!
"Cleone...." said Philip gently.
"Cleone..." Philip said softly.
The tears were running down her cheeks, but she kept her head turned away.
The tears were streaming down her face, but she kept her head turned away.
"Please—go!" she begged huskily.
"Please—go!" she pleaded hoarsely.
He was coming across the room towards her.... Cleone gripped her hands.
He was walking across the room toward her... Cleone clenched her hands.
"Cleone ... dearest!"
"Cleone ... my love!"
A heartbroken sob betrayed her. Philip took her in his arms.
A heartbroken sob escaped her. Philip held her in his arms.
"My sweetheart! Crying? Oh no, no! There is naught now to distress you."
"My sweetheart! Are you crying? Oh no, no! There's nothing now to upset you."
The feel of his arms about her was sheer bliss; their strength was like a haven of refuge. Yet Cleone tried to thrust him away.
The feeling of his arms around her was pure bliss; their strength felt like a safe haven. Still, Cleone tried to push him away.
"What—must you—think of me!" she sobbed.
"What do you think of me!" she cried.
He drew her closer, till her head rested against his shoulder.
He pulled her closer until her head rested on his shoulder.
"Why, that you are a dear, foolish, naughty little Cleone. Chérie, don't cry. It is only your Philip—your own Philip, who has always loved you, and only you. Look up, my darling, look up!"
"Why, you are such a sweet, silly, naughty little Cleone. Chérie, don’t cry. It’s just your Philip—your own Philip, who has always loved you, and only you. Look up, my darling, look up!"
Cleone gave way to the insistence of his arms.
Cleone gave in to the persistence of his arms.
"Oh, Philip—forgive me!" she wept. "I have—been mad!" She raised her head and Philips arms tightened still more. He bent over her and kissed her parted lips almost fiercely.
"Oh, Philip—forgive me!" she cried. "I’ve—lost my mind!" She lifted her head and Philip's arms tightened even more. He bent down and kissed her slightly open lips almost passionately.
Later, seated beside him on the couch, her head on his shoulder, and his arm about her, Cleone gave a great sigh.
Later, sitting next to him on the couch, her head on his shoulder and his arm around her, Cleone let out a deep sigh.
"But why—why did you treat me so—hatefully—when you—came back, Philip?"
"But why—why did you treat me so—hatefully—when you—came back, Philip?"
"I was hurt, darling, and wished to see whether you wanted the real me—or a painted puppet. But then you changed suddenly—and I knew not what to think."
"I was hurt, babe, and wanted to see if you wanted the real me—or a fake version. But then you suddenly changed—and I didn't know what to think."
Cleone nestled closer.
Cleone snuggled closer.
"Because I thought you—did not care! But oh, Philip, Philip, I have been so unhappy!"
"Because I thought you didn't care! But oh, Philip, Philip, I've been so unhappy!"
Philip promptly kissed her.
Philip quickly kissed her.
"And—last night—Philip, you don't think I—"
"And—last night—Philip, you don't think I—"
"Sweetheart! Is it likely that I'd believe ill of you?"
"Sweetheart! Do you really think I could believe something bad about you?"
She hid her face.
She covered her face.
"I—I believed—ill—of you," she whispered.
"I—I thought—I was wrong about you," she whispered.
"But you do not believe it now, sweetheart?"
"But you don't believe it now, sweetheart?"
"No, oh no! But—but—that duel with Mr. Bancroft. Was it—was it—some—French lady?"
"No, oh no! But—but—that duel with Mr. Bancroft. Was it—was it—some—French lady?"
Philip was silent for a moment.
Philip was quiet for a moment.
"No, Cleone. That is all I can say."
"No, Cleone. That's all I can say."
"Was it"—her voice was breathless—"was it—me?"
"Was it"—her voice was breathless—"was it—me?"
Philip did not answer.
Philip didn't answer.
"It was! How wonderful!"
"It was amazing!"
Philip was startled.
Philip was surprised.
"You are pleased, Cleone? Pleased?"
"Are you happy, Cleone? Happy?"
"Of course I am! I—oo!" She gave a little wriggle of delight. "Why did you not tell me?"
"Of course I am! I—wow!" She squirmed with excitement. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"It is not—one of the things one tells one's lady-love," said Philip.
"It’s not something you tell your girlfriend," Philip said.
"Oh! And to-day? How did you—persuade Sir Deryk?"
"Oh! And today? How did you manage to convince Sir Deryk?"
"Through the arm. But he had no intention of holding you to your word."
"Through the arm. But he didn't plan on holding you to your promise."
Cleone grew rather rigid.
Cleone became quite stiff.
"Oh—indeed? In-deed?"
"Oh, really? Seriously?"
Philip was mystified.
Philip was confused.
"You did not want to be held to it, did you, chérie?"
"You didn't want to be tied down to it, did you, darling?"
"N-no. But—I don't like him, Philip."
"N-no. But—I don't like him, Philip."
"I did not, I confess. I think I do now."
"I didn't, I admit. I think I do now."
"Do you? And what of James?"
"Do you? And what about James?"
"Oh, James! He will recover."
"Oh, James! He'll bounce back."
There was a pause while Cleone digested this.
There was a pause as Cleone processed this.
"Philip?"
"Phil?"
"Cleone?"
"Cleone?"
"You—you—don't care for Jenny, do you?"
"You—you—don't care about Jenny, do you?"
"Jenny? Cleone, for shame! Because I was polite—"
"Jenny? Cleone, come on! Just because I was nice—"
"More than that, Philip!"
"That's not all, Philip!"
"Well, dearest, no one paid any heed to her or was kind. What would you?"
"Well, dear, no one paid any attention to her or was nice. What would you do?"
"It was only that? I thought—I thought—"
"It was just that? I thought—I thought—"
"Cleone, you think too much," he chided her. "Next you will accuse me of loving Ann Nutley!" It was a master-stroke, and he knew it.
"Cleone, you overthink things," he teased her. "Soon you'll be claiming I have feelings for Ann Nutley!" It was a clever move, and he was aware of it.
"You didn't? Not a tiny bit?"
"You didn't? Not even a little bit?"
"Not an atom!"
"Not a chance!"
"And no one—in Paris?"
"And no one—in Paris?"
"No one. I have pretended, but they all knew that I had already lost my heart."
"No one. I acted like everything was fine, but they all knew that I had already lost my heart."
"You pretended?... Oh!"
"You pretended?... Wow!"
"One must, sweetest."
"One must, darling."
"But—"
"But—"
He drew her closer.
He pulled her closer.
"But never, most beautiful, did I become engaged—twice in one evening!" He stifled the cry that rose to her lips.
"But never, most beautiful, did I get engaged—twice in one evening!" He held back the cry that wanted to escape her lips.
"Philip, that is ungallant, and—and hateful!"
"Philip, that's so rude and—just awful!"
He laughed.
He chuckled.
"Is it not? Ah, Cleone! Tell me, my dearest, what is in your locket?"
"Is it not? Ah, Cleone! Tell me, my dear, what's in your locket?"
"Something I meant to burn," she murmured.
"Something I meant to burn," she said softly.
"But did not?"
"But didn't?"
"No—I could not." She fumbled at her bosom and drew out the trinket. "See for yourself, Philip."
"No—I couldn't." She fumbled at her chest and pulled out the trinket. "See for yourself, Philip."
He opened it. A rolled lock of brown hair fell out and a torn scrap of parchment. Philip turned it over.
He opened it. A rolled lock of brown hair fell out along with a torn piece of parchment. Philip flipped it over.
"Yours till death, Philip," he read. "Cleone, my love."
"Yours until death, Philip," he read. "Cleone, my love."
She buried her face on his shoulder.
She buried her face in his shoulder.
"Your—hair—your poor hair!" she said.
"Your hair—oh no!" she said.
"All gone! Look up, Cleone!"
"All gone! Look up, Cleone!"
She lifted her face. He gazed down at her, rapt.
She lifted her face. He looked down at her, captivated.
"Oh, Cleone—I shall write a sonnet to your wonderful eyes!" he breathed.
"Oh, Cleone—I’m going to write a sonnet to your beautiful eyes!" he said.
TwentyTwenty
Mademoiselle de Chaucheron Rings Down the CurtainMademoiselle de Chaucheron Closes the Curtain
Sir Maurice Jettan stood in the withdrawing-room of the Hotel Cleone and studied himself in the glass. He smiled a little and straightened his shoulders.
Sir Maurice Jettan stood in the lounge of the Hotel Cleone and looked at himself in the mirror. He smiled slightly and straightened his shoulders.
There came a swish of skirts in the passage without, and the door opened. In walked Cleone, a fair vision in a gown of pure white satin and lace.
There was a swish of skirts in the hallway outside, and the door opened. Cleone entered, a beautiful sight in a gown of pure white satin and lace.
Sir Maurice turned. He raised his quizzing-glass the better to inspect his daughter-in-law.
Sir Maurice turned. He lifted his monocle to get a better look at his daughter-in-law.
"Upon my soul, Cleone!" he ejaculated.
"Seriously, Cleone!" he exclaimed.
Cleone swept him a curtsey, laughing.
Cleone gave him a quick curtsy, laughing.
"Is it not ridiculous? Philip insisted. Wait till you see him!" She ran to the mirror. "Do you like the way my hair is dressed, father?"
"Isn't it ridiculous?" Philip insisted. "Wait until you see him!" She ran to the mirror. "Do you like how my hair looks, Dad?"
"I am struck dumb by the whole effect!" answered Sir Maurice. "Yes, I like that white rose in your hair."
"I’m absolutely speechless by the whole thing!" replied Sir Maurice. "Yeah, I really like that white rose in your hair."
"Oh, you must tell Philip that! He spent hours and hours trying to place it to his entire satisfaction! It has been terrible, je t'assure. Yes, I am beginning to acquire an accent, am I not? Philip nearly tore his beautiful wig in his anxiety!" She re-arranged the roses at her breast. "At one time I expected him to summon François to his assistance. But he refrained, and here am I!"
"Oh, you have to tell Philip that! He spent hours trying to get it just right! It was awful, I assure you. Yes, I'm starting to pick up an accent, aren't I? Philip was so anxious he almost tore off his beautiful wig!" She adjusted the roses at her chest. "At one point, I thought he might call François to help him. But he held back, and here I am!"
Sir Maurice sat down.
Sir Maurice took a seat.
"Has he been dressing you, my dear?"
"Has he been dressing you, my love?"
"Has he—! For the past three hours, sir! He has driven my maid distracted." She started to count on her fingers. "He spent half an hour superintending my hair-dressing and another half an hour placing this rose and the pearls. Then half an hour went to my patches—this is when he nearly tore his wig!—he could not decide where to put them. The arrangement of my gown occupied quite an hour in all. And then he was much put out over my jewels." She held up her fingers. "I vow they are red and sore, sir! I have had rings pushed on them, and dragged off them, until I was nigh screaming with impatience! But now I am dressed—and I have been told on pain of Philip's direst wrath to n'y toucher pas!" She sat down on the couch beside Sir Maurice and slipped her hand in his. "Is he not absurd? And oh, I am prodigious nervous!"
"Has he—! For the past three hours, sir! He has driven my maid crazy." She started counting on her fingers. "He spent half an hour overseeing my hair, and another half an hour positioning this rose and the pearls. Then half an hour went to my patches—this is when he almost tore his wig!—he couldn't decide where to put them. The arrangement of my dress took a whole hour. And then he got really upset about my jewelry." She held up her fingers. "I swear they are red and sore, sir! I've had rings pushed on them and pulled off until I was almost screaming with impatience! But now I’m dressed—and I’ve been told that if I touch anything, Philip will be furious!" She sat down on the couch beside Sir Maurice and slipped her hand into his. "Isn't he ridiculous? Oh, and I’m incredibly nervous!"
"Why, my dear? What should make you so?"
"Why, my dear? What’s making you feel that way?"
"You see, it is my first appearance in Paris—it is to be my first ball—and I am so afraid I shall not understand what is said to me, or—or something mortifying!"
"You see, it’s my first time in Paris—it’s going to be my first ball—and I’m so scared I won’t understand what’s being said to me, or—or something embarrassing!"
"Not understand? Nonsense, Clo! Why, you have talked hardly any English since you have been married."
"Not understand? That's ridiculous, Clo! You hardly spoke any English since you got married."
"Yes, but I am not at all fluent. Philip says everyone will be most amiable, but—oh, dear!"
"Yes, but I'm really not fluent at all. Philip says everyone will be really friendly, but—oh, man!"
At that moment François darted into the room, a harassed frown on his face.
At that moment, François rushed into the room, a stressed look on his face.
"Ah, pardon, madame! Pardon, m'sieu'! Je cherche la tabatière de m'sieu' Philippe!"
"Ah, excuse me, ma'am! Excuse me, sir! I'm looking for Mr. Philippe's snuffbox!"
"Laquelle?" asked Cleone. Sir Maurice was amused by her serious air. "The one with the pearls?"
"Which one?" asked Cleone. Sir Maurice found her serious demeanor amusing. "The one with the pearls?"
"Mais oui, madame. It is this fool of a Jacques who has lost it, sans doute! Ah, la voilà!" He seized the errant box and skipped out again. Cleone breathed a sigh of relief.
"But yes, ma'am. It's this idiot Jacques who lost it, no doubt! Ah, there it is!" He grabbed the misplaced box and dashed out again. Cleone let out a sigh of relief.
"How terrible if it had been really lost!" she said.
"How awful if it had actually been lost!" she said.
Sir Maurice laughed.
Sir Maurice chuckled.
"Would it have been so great a catastrophe?"
"Would it have really been such a disaster?"
"But of course! It matches his dress, you understand."
"But of course! It goes perfectly with his outfit, you know."
"I see." Sir Maurice smothered another laugh. "My dear, do you know that it is three years since last I was in this city of cities?"
"I see." Sir Maurice stifled another laugh. "My dear, do you realize that it's been three years since I was last in this amazing city?"
"Is it? Don't you think it is a wonderful place? Philip took me for a walk yesterday, and I was enchanted! And this house—I know I shall never bear to leave it! Philip says that the Hotel Cleone will be the most fashionable one in Paris! I was so surprised when he brought me here! I had no idea that there was a house waiting for me. He and François got all ready the week before our marriage! I've never been so happy in my life! And to-night I am to see Philip in what he calls his milieu. He tells me he was never at home in London."
"Is it? Don’t you think it’s a wonderful place? Philip took me for a walk yesterday, and I was enchanted! And this house—I know I’ll never want to leave it! Philip says that the Hotel Cleone will be the most fashionable one in Paris! I was so surprised when he brought me here! I had no idea there was a house waiting for me. He and François had everything ready the week before our wedding! I’ve never been so happy in my life! And tonight, I’m going to see Philip in what he calls his element. He tells me he never felt at home in London."
"Philip in his milieu. Paris." Sir Maurice smiled down at her. "When I think of what Philip was not quite a year ago...."
"Philip in his environment. Paris." Sir Maurice smiled down at her. "When I think about what Philip was like not quite a year ago...."
"It seems impossible, doesn't it? But oh, I am glad now that I sent him away. He is quite, quite perfect!"
"It seems impossible, right? But oh, I’m really glad I sent him away. He’s just so perfect!"
"H'm!" said Sir Maurice.
"Hmm!" said Sir Maurice.
Cleone laughed at him.
Cleone laughed at him.
"You pretend! I know how proud you are!"
"You’re pretending! I know how proud you are!"
"Minx! I confess I am curious to see Philip in his Parisian Society. No one knows that he is here?"
"Minx! I admit I'm curious to see Philip in his Parisian Society. Does anyone know he's here?"
"Not a soul. He insisted on guarding the secret until he could make a really dramatic appearance at the Duchesse de Sauverin's ball to-night. He is mad, you know, quite mad! Oh, here he is!"
"Not a soul. He was adamant about keeping the secret until he could make a truly dramatic entrance at the Duchesse de Sauverin's ball tonight. He's nuts, you know, completely nuts! Oh, here he is!"
Philip came into the room with a rustle of stiff silks. Sir Maurice started at him.
Philip came into the room, the sound of stiff silks rustling. Sir Maurice looked up at him in surprise.
"Good God, Philip, what audacity!"
"Wow, Philip, what audacity!"
From head to foot his son was clad in white. The only splash of colour was the red heels of his shoes; his only jewels were pearls and diamonds; on the lapel of his coat he wore a single white rose.
From head to toe, his son was dressed in white. The only hint of color was the red heels of his shoes; his only jewelry was pearls and diamonds; on the lapel of his coat, he wore a single white rose.
"Isn't it ridiculous?" said Cleone. "But doesn't he look beautiful?"
"Isn't that ridiculous?" Cleone said. "But doesn't he look amazing?"
"Stand up, child, and let me see you side by side.... Yes. What audacity! Had I known, I would have attired myself in black—the old man at the ball."
"Stand up, kid, and let me see you next to me.... Yes. What nerve! If I had known, I would have worn black—the old man at the party."
"'Twould have made an excellent foil," agreed Philip. "But no matter. Cleone, you have re-arranged your roses!"
"It would have made an excellent contrast," agreed Philip. "But it doesn't matter. Cleone, you've rearranged your roses!"
Cleone backed, warding him off.
Cleone stepped back, pushing him away.
"I cry your pardon, sir! Oh no, let me be!"
"I’m sorry, sir! Oh no, just leave me alone!"
Philip came to her, and with deft fingers pulled the flowers into position.
Philip approached her and skillfully adjusted the flowers into place.
"One of them must kiss your skin, so! To show that it is no whiter than the skin. Voilà, c'est bien!"
"One of them has to kiss your skin, then! To prove that it’s no whiter than your skin. There you go, that’s right!"
"Who is likely to be at the ball to-night, Philip?" asked his father.
"Who do you think will be at the ball tonight, Philip?" his father asked.
"Tout le monde. One always goes to Madame de Sauverin's balls. It is de rigueur."
"Everyone. You always go to Madame de Sauverin's parties. It's a must."
"We shall be late!" warned Cleone. "Oh, we are late now!"
"We're going to be late!" Cleone warned. "Oh, we are late now!"
"That is also de rigueur," said Philip.
"That's also the norm," said Philip.
"Sir Maurice, M'sieu', et Madame Jettan!" announced the lackey.
"Sir Maurice, M'sieu', and Madame Jettan!" announced the servant.
There was a sudden hush. All eyes turned to the late-comers. In the doorway stood a tall gentleman, at his side two dazzling visions in white.
There was an abrupt silence. Everyone looked at the late arrivals. In the doorway stood a tall man, next to him were two stunning figures in white.
Madame de Sauverin stared for a moment in wonderment. Then she hurried forward, hands outstretched.
Madame de Sauverin stared in amazement for a moment. Then she quickly moved forward, reaching out with her hands.
"Philippe!"
"Philippe!"
"Philippe! Le petit Philippe!" A score of voices took up the cry. Nearly everyone there surged forward.
"Philippe! The little Philippe!" A crowd of voices joined in. Almost everyone there rushed forward.
Philip kissed Madame's hand.
Philip kissed the lady's hand.
"Chère madame! I may present my wife? My father you know."
"Dear madam! May I introduce my wife? You know my father."
Cleone curtseyed low.
Cleone curtsied low.
"Your—wife!" Madame took Cleone's hands. "Voyons, voyons, notre petit Philippe s'est éspousé! Et Maurice!"
"Your—wife!" Madame took Cleone's hands. "Come on, come on, our little Philippe got married! And Maurice!"
Philip and Cleone were at the centre of a welcoming throng. Cleone's hand was kissed a dozen times. Delighted questions were shot at Philip.
Philip and Cleone were surrounded by a warm crowd. Cleone's hand was kissed several times. Excited questions were thrown at Philip.
Saint-Dantin grasped his hand.
Saint-Dantin took his hand.
"Mon cher petit! You have returned at last? Et madame!" He bowed to the blushing Cleone. "There is no need to ask who is, madame." He smiled at her. "It is evident that her name is Cleone!"
"My dear little one! You've finally returned? And madame!" He bowed to the blushing Cleone. "There's no need to ask who madame is." He smiled at her. "It's clear that her name is Cleone!"
De Vangrisse pressed forward.
De Vangrisse moved ahead.
"The mysterious Cleone! Madame, votre serviteur! We have all longed to see the lady who so consistently held Philip's heart!"
"The enigmatic Cleone! Madam, at your service! We've all been eager to meet the woman who so steadfastly captured Philip's heart!"
"Philippe, how long have you been in Paris?" demanded De Chatelin. "You are going to remain? Ah bon!"
"Philippe, how long have you been in Paris?" asked De Chatelin. "Are you planning to stay? Oh really!"
"Philippe, have you an ode for the occasion?" asked another laughing voice.
"Philippe, do you have a poem for the occasion?" asked another laughing voice.
Clothilde de Chaucheron pushed through the ring.
Clothilde de Chaucheron pushed her way through the ring.
"Le petit Philippe au cœur perdu!" she cried.
"Little Philippe with a broken heart!" she cried.
Philip disengaged himself from the clutches of Saint-Dantin and took his wife's hand.
Philip freed himself from Saint-Dantin's grip and took his wife's hand.
"Mademoiselle de Chaucheron, chérie," he said, and bowed.
"Mademoiselle de Chaucheron, darling," he said, and bowed.
Clothilde gazed at Cleone for a moment. Then she swept a deep curtsey.
Clothilde looked at Cleone for a moment. Then she did a deep curtsy.
"Je me trompe," she said, smiling. "Le petit Philippe au cœur trouvé."
"I'm mistaken," she said, smiling. "Little Philippe with the found heart."
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