This is a modern-English version of A journey round my room, originally written by Maistre, Xavier de.
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A JOURNEY ROUND MY ROOM.
A JOURNEY AROUND MY ROOM.
A J O U R N E Y
ROUND MY ROOM
BY XAVIER DE MAISTRE
TRANSLATED FROM THE FRENCH WITH A NOTICE
OF THE AUTHOR’S LIFE
By H. A.
LONDON
LONGMANS, GREEN, READER, AND DYER.
1871
H. O. HOUGHTON AND CO., PRINTERS, RIVERSIDE PRESS,
CAMBRIDGE.
{i}
TO
S. A.
H. A.
BY XAVIER DE MAISTRE
TRANSLATED FROM THE FRENCH WITH A NOTICE
OF THE AUTHOR’S LIFE
By H. A.
LONDON
LONGMANS, GREEN, READER, AND DYER.
1871
H. O. HOUGHTON AND CO., PRINTERS, RIVERSIDE PRESS,
CAMBRIDGE.
{i}
TO
S. A.
H. A.
PREFACE.
THE author of the “Voyage autour de ma Chambre” was the younger brother of Count Joseph de Maistre, a well-known writer upon political and philosophical subjects. Chambéry was the place of their birth, but their family was of French origin. Both brothers were officers in the Sardinian army; and when Savoy was conquered by the French, Xavier de Maistre sought an asylum in Saint Petersburg, where his brother resided in the capacity of envoy from the court of Sardinia. Xavier entered the Russian army, distinguished himself in the war{iv} against Persia, and attained the rank of major-general.
THE author of "Voyage autour de ma Chambre" was the younger brother of Count Joseph de Maistre, a well-known writer on political and philosophical topics. They were born in Chambéry, but their family was of French descent. Both brothers served as officers in the Sardinian army; when Savoy was taken over by the French, Xavier de Maistre sought refuge in Saint Petersburg, where his brother was serving as an envoy for the court of Sardinia. Xavier joined the Russian army, made a name for himself in the war{iv} against Persia, and rose to the rank of major-general.
Our interest in the “Voyage” is heightened by our knowledge that it was actually written during De Maistre’s forty-two days’ arrest at Turin, referred to in the third chapter. He sent the manuscript, which he regarded as a mere playful effort of his imagination, for his brother’s perusal. Joseph was pleased with the book; and Xavier, who had an almost filial affection for his brother, was soon afterwards agreeably surprised by receiving, in place of his manuscript, the “Voyage” in print.
Our interest in the “Voyage” is increased by the fact that it was actually written during De Maistre’s forty-two days of detention in Turin, mentioned in the third chapter. He sent the manuscript, which he considered just a fun exercise of his imagination, for his brother to read. Joseph liked the book; and Xavier, who had a nearly fatherly affection for his brother, was happily surprised to receive the printed “Voyage” instead of his manuscript shortly afterward.
This success encouraged him to begin a sequel to the “Voyage.” Joseph, however, disapproved of this new attempt. The “Expédition Nocturne” was, notwithstanding, finished, and was published some years later.{v}
This success motivated him to start a sequel to the “Voyage.” Joseph, however, didn't approve of this new effort. The “Expédition Nocturne” was completed despite this and published a few years later.{v}
Xavier de Maistre’s next production (1811) was “Le Lépreux de la Cité d’Aoste,” a very touching and gracefully written narrative. It occupies but a few pages; and, as it is to be found in almost every good anthology of French literature, is perhaps the best known of our author’s works.
Xavier de Maistre’s next work (1811) was “Le Lépreux de la Cité d’Aoste,” a very moving and beautifully written story. It is only a few pages long, and since it appears in nearly every good anthology of French literature, it’s probably the most well-known of our author’s works.
His other books are “Les Prisonniers du Caucase” (1815) and “La Jeune Sibérienne,” both of them charming works, containing faithful pictures of domestic scenes with which we are little familiar through other sources.
His other books are “The Prisoners of the Caucasus” (1815) and “The Young Siberian,” both charming works that offer accurate depictions of domestic scenes we aren't very familiar with from other sources.
From his childhood Xavier de Maistre was devoted to painting. He deservedly gained considerable reputation as a painter of miniature portraits and landscapes.
From a young age, Xavier de Maistre was dedicated to painting. He rightly earned a significant reputation as a painter of miniature portraits and landscapes.
Nor did he neglect science while devo{vi}ting himself to art and literature. He applied himself so successfully to the study of chemistry that he was able to communicate several valuable “Mémoires” to the Academy of Turin, of which he was a member.
Nor did he ignore science while dedicating himself to art and literature. He worked so hard at studying chemistry that he was able to share several valuable "Mémoires" with the Academy of Turin, of which he was a member.
Xavier de Maistre died (1852) at an advanced age in his adopted country, where he had married, and which he only quitted once, for a brief season.
Xavier de Maistre passed away in 1852 at an old age in the country he had chosen as his home, where he got married, and he only left it once, for a short time.
Some apology for publishing this translation is perhaps necessary.
Some apology for publishing this translation might be necessary.
Although in France the “Voyage” retains the high esteem in which it has been held for half a century, it is hardly known in England, except by those who are familiar with the French language and literature.{vii}
Although in France the “Voyage” is still highly regarded after fifty years, it's not well-known in England, except among those who are familiar with French language and literature.{vii}
During the last twenty years the proportion of educated persons in this country who are unable to enjoy a French book in the original has greatly decreased. Still, there are some to whom a translation of this delightful work may be acceptable.
During the last twenty years, the percentage of educated people in this country who can't enjoy a French book in the original has greatly decreased. Still, there are some who might find a translation of this delightful work acceptable.
To them I offer the pleasant labor of a few leisure hours; but not without assuring them that, in endeavoring to reproduce faithfully the author’s ideas, I have felt at every paragraph how true it is that “le style ne se traduit pas,”—“style is untranslatable.”
To them, I present the enjoyable task of a few free hours; but I must stress that, in trying to accurately convey the author's ideas, I've recognized at every paragraph how true it is that “le style ne se traduit pas,”—“style is untranslatable.”
The headings of the chapters are not De Maistre’s. They appear in Tardieu’s pretty little edition of the “Voyage.” The miniatures, by M. Veyssier, are from the same source.
The headings of the chapters aren't by De Maistre. They come from Tardieu’s nice little edition of the “Voyage.” The miniatures, by M. Veyssier, are from the same source.
H. A.
H. A.
CONTENTS.
Circumstances beyond my control prevented my seeing any proof of these pages. Such Latinized forms as behavior and favor; the misplaced hyphen on the first line of page 25; the double l in skilful (p. 138, last line but one); and the frequent suppression of the former of two parenthetical commas (as before I, p. 19, l. 18),—these are the few deviations from my manuscript for which the printer is responsible.
Circumstances beyond my control stopped me from seeing any proof of these pages. Things like the Latinized forms behavior and favor; the misplaced hyphen on the first line of page 25; the double l in skilful (p. 138, second to last line); and the frequent omission of the first of two parenthetical commas (as before I, p. 19, l. 18)—these are the few mistakes from my manuscript that the printer is responsible for.
The reader will oblige by substituting comfortable for agreeable on page 38 line 3, sweet for lovely on page 68 line 4, and ignoramuses for ignorant on page 78 line 12.
The reader will please replace comfortable with agreeable on page 38 line 3, sweet with lovely on page 68 line 4, and ignoramuses with ignorant on page 78 line 12.

I.
A Book of Discoveries.
WHAT more glorious than to open for one’s self a new career,—to appear suddenly before the learned world with a book of discoveries in one’s hand, like an unlooked-for comet blazing in the empyrean!
WHAT could be more amazing than starting a new career—showing up unexpectedly in the academic world with a book full of discoveries, like a surprise comet shining in the sky!
No longer will I keep my book in obscurity. Behold it, gentlemen; read it! I have undertaken and performed a forty-two days’ journey round my room. The interesting observations I have made, and the constant pleasure I have experienced all along the road, made me wish to publish my travels; the certainty of being{2} useful decided the matter. And when I think of the number of unhappy ones to whom I offer a never failing resource for weary moments, and a balm for the ills they suffer, my heart is filled with inexpressible satisfaction. The pleasure to be found in travelling round one’s room is sheltered from the restless jealousy of men, and is independent of Fortune.
I won't keep my book hidden anymore. Here it is, everyone; read it! I went on a journey around my room for forty-two days. The fascinating things I observed and the joy I felt during this time made me want to share my travels; knowing it could be{2} useful sealed the deal. When I think about how many people are unhappy and how I can offer them a constant escape during tough times, my heart swells with indescribable happiness. The joy of exploring one’s own room is free from the endless envy of others and doesn’t rely on luck.
Surely there is no being so miserable as to be without a retreat to which he can withdraw and hide himself from the world. Such a hiding-place will contain all the preparations our journey requires.
Surely there’s no one so miserable as to be without a place to escape to where they can hide from the world. This hiding place will have everything we need for our journey.
Every man of sense will, I am sure, adopt my system, whatever may be his peculiar character or temperament. Be he miserly or prodigal, rich or poor, young or old, born beneath the torrid zone or near the poles, he may travel with me. Among the immense family of men who throng the earth, there is not one, no, not{3} one (I mean of those who inhabit rooms), who, after reading this book can refuse his approbation of the new mode of travelling I introduce into the world.{4}
Every sensible person will, I'm sure, adopt my method, no matter what their unique character or temperament may be. Whether they're stingy or extravagant, wealthy or struggling, young or old, born in a hot climate or near the poles, they can travel with me. Among the vast population of people on Earth, there isn't a single one, not {3} one (I mean those who have rooms), who, after reading this book, could deny their approval of the new way of traveling that I’m introducing to the world.{4}
II.
Eulogy of the Journey.
I MIGHT fairly begin the eulogium of my journey by saying it has cost me nothing. This point merits attention. It will gain for it the praise and welcome of people of moderate means. And not of these only: there is another class with whom its success will, on this account, be even more certain. “And who are they?” you ask. Why, the rich, to be sure. And then, again, what a comfort the new mode of travelling will be to the sick; they need not fear bleak winds or change of weather. And what a thing, too, it will be for cowards; they will be safe from pitfalls or quagmires. Thousands who hitherto did not dare, others who were not able, and{5} others to whom it never occurred to think of such a thing as going on a journey, will make up their minds to follow my example. Surely, the idlest person will not hesitate to set out with me on a pleasure jaunt which will cost him neither trouble nor money. Come then, let us start! Follow me, all ye whom the “pangs of despised love” or the slights of friends keep within doors,—follow me far from the meannesses and unkindnesses of men. Be ye unhappy, sick, or weary, follow me. Ye idle ones, arouse ye, one and all. And ye who brood over gloomy projects of reform and retreat, on account of some infidelity,—amiable anchorites of an evening’s duration, who renounce the world for your boudoir,—come, and be led by me to banish these dark thoughts; you lose a moment’s pleasure without gaining a moment’s wisdom! Deign to accompany me on my journey. We will jog cheerfully and by easy stages{6} along the road of travellers who have seen both Rome and Paris. No obstacle shall hinder our way; and giving ourselves up gaily to Imagination, we will follow her whithersoever it may be her good pleasure to lead us.{7}
I CAN honestly start praising my journey by saying it hasn’t cost me anything. This is worth noting. It will earn praise and a warm welcome from those with moderate means. But it won’t just appeal to them; there’s another group for whom its success is even more guaranteed. “And who are they?” you might ask. Well, the wealthy, of course. Plus, think about how comforting this new way of traveling will be for those who are sick; they won’t have to worry about harsh winds or shifting weather. And it will be great for those who are timid; they’ll be protected from dangers and muddy spots. Thousands who previously didn’t dare to travel, others who weren’t able, and{5} those who never even thought about going on a trip will be inspired to follow my lead. Surely, even the laziest person will be eager to join me on a fun outing that costs them no effort or money. So, let’s go! Follow me, all you who feel the “pangs of unrequited love” or the snubs of friends that keep you inside—follow me away from the meanness and unkindness of people. Whether you’re unhappy, sick, or tired, follow me. You lazy folks, get up, all of you. And you who dwell on dark thoughts of reform and retreat because of some betrayal—charming hermits for an evening who give up the world for your own space—come, let me lead you to cast away those gloomy thoughts; you lose a moment of joy without gaining any wisdom! Please join me on my journey. We’ll move along cheerfully and at a comfortable pace{6} on the road of travelers who have seen both Rome and Paris. Nothing will stop us; and giving ourselves over happily to Imagination, we will follow her wherever she wishes to take us.{7}
III.
Laws and Customs.
HOW many inquisitive people there are in the world! I am sure my reader wants to know why the journey round my room has lasted forty-two days rather than forty-three, or any other number. But how am I to tell him what I do not know myself? All I can say is, that if the work is too long for him, it is not my fault that it was not shorter. I dismiss all the pride a traveller may fairly indulge in, and candidly declare I should have been well contented, for my part, with a single chapter. It is quite true that I made myself as comfortable as possible in my room; but still, alas, I was not my own master in the matter of leaving it. Nay,{8} more, I even think that had it not been for the intervention of certain powerful persons who interested themselves in me, and towards whom I entertain a lively sense of gratitude, I should have had ample time for producing a folio volume; so prejudiced in my favor were the guardians who made me travel round my room.
HOW many curious people there are in the world! I’m sure my reader wants to know why my journey around my room has lasted forty-two days instead of forty-three or any other number. But how can I explain what I don’t even understand myself? All I can say is that if this work is too lengthy for the reader, it’s not my fault it wasn’t shorter. I set aside any traveler’s pride I might usually feel and honestly admit that I would have been fine with just a single chapter. It’s true that I made myself as comfortable as possible in my room; however, I still wasn’t the one in control of leaving it. Moreover,{8} I believe that if it hadn’t been for the help of certain influential people who took an interest in me, and for whom I feel a deep sense of gratitude, I would have had plenty of time to produce a massive book; the guardians who made me travel around my room were quite biased in my favor.
And yet, intelligent reader, see how wrong these men were; and understand clearly, if you can, the argument I am about to put before you.
And yet, smart reader, notice how wrong these guys were; and try to understand clearly, if you can, the argument I'm about to present to you.
Can there be anything more natural or more just than to draw your sword upon a man who happens to tread on your toe, who lets slip a bitter word during a moment’s vexation caused by your own thoughtlessness, or who has had the misfortune to gain favor in the sight of your lady-love?
Can there be anything more natural or fair than to draw your sword against someone who steps on your toe, who accidentally says something hurtful in a moment of irritation caused by your own carelessness, or who is simply unlucky enough to win the affection of your crush?
Under such or like circumstances, you betake yourself to a meadow, and there, like Nicole and the “Bourgeois Gentilhomme,{9}” you try to give the fourth cut while your adversary parries tierce; and, that vengeance may be fully satisfied, you present your naked breast to him, thus running the risk of being killed by your enemy, in order to be avenged.
Under such circumstances, you head to a meadow, and there, like Nicole in the “Bourgeois Gentilhomme,{9}” you attempt to land the fourth strike while your opponent defends against tierce; and, to fully satisfy your desire for revenge, you expose your bare chest to him, risking being killed by your enemy in the process of seeking vengeance.
It is evident that such a custom is most reasonable. And yet, we sometimes meet with people who disapprove of so praiseworthy a course. But what is about of a piece with the rest of the business is, that the very persons who condemn the course we have described, and who would have it regarded as a grave error, would judge still more harshly any one who refused to commit it. More than one unlucky wight has, by endeavoring to conform to their opinion, lost his reputation and his livelihood. So that, when people are so unfortunate as to have an affair of honor to settle, it would not be a bad plan to cast lots to see whether it shall be arranged accord{10}ing to law, or according to fashion. And as law and fashion are at variance, the judges might decide upon their sentence by the aid of dice,—and probably it is to some such decision as this that we should have to refer in order to explain how it came about that my journey lasted just two and forty days.{11}
It’s clear that this custom makes a lot of sense. Yet, we sometimes encounter people who disapprove of such a commendable practice. What’s even more ironic is that the very individuals who criticize the practice we’ve described and view it as a serious mistake would be even harsher judges of anyone who chose not to follow it. More than one unfortunate person has lost their reputation and job by trying to fit in with their views. So, when people find themselves needing to settle a matter of honor, it wouldn’t be a bad idea to cast lots to determine whether to resolve it by the law or by social norms. Since law and fashion often conflict, the judges might decide their verdict by rolling dice—and maybe it’s to some arrangement like this that we should look to explain how my journey lasted exactly forty-two days.{11}
IV.
Latitude and Topography.
MY room is situated in latitude 48° east, according to the measurement of Father Beccaria. It lies east and west, and, if you keep very close to the wall, forms a parallelogram of thirty-six steps round. My journey will, however, be longer than this; for I shall traverse my room up and down and across, without rule or plan. I shall even zig-zag about, following, if needs be, every possible geometrical line. I am no admirer of people who are such masters of their every step and every idea that they can say: “To-morrow I shall make three calls, write four letters, and finish this or that work.” So open is my soul to all sorts of ideas, tastes, and feel{12}ings; so greedily does it absorb whatever comes first, that ... but why should it deny itself the delights that are scattered along life’s hard path? So few and far between are they, that it would indeed be senseless not to stop, and even turn aside, to gather such as are placed within our reach. Of these joys, none, to my thinking, is more attractive than following the course of one’s fancies as a hunter follows his game, without pretending to keep to any set route. Hence, when I travel in my room, I seldom keep to a straight line. From my table I go towards a picture which is placed in a corner; thence I set out in an oblique direction for the door; and then, although on starting I had intended to return to my table, yet, if I chance to fall in with my arm-chair on the way, I at once, and most unceremoniously, take up my quarters therein. By the by, what a capital article of furniture an arm{13}-chair is, and, above all, how convenient to a thoughtful man. In long winter evenings it is ofttimes sweet, and always prudent, to stretch yourself therein, far from the bustle of crowded assemblies. A good fire, some books and pens; what safeguards these against ennui! And how pleasant, again, to forget books and pens in order to stir the fire, while giving one’s self up to some agreeable meditation, or stringing together a few rhymes for the amusement of friends, as the hours glide by and fall into eternity, without making their sad passage felt.{14}
MY room is located at latitude 48° east, based on Father Beccaria's measurements. It runs east and west, and if you stay close to the wall, it creates a thirty-six-step parallelogram. However, my journey will be longer than that; I’ll wander around my room freely, moving up and down and across with no fixed plan. I’ll even zig-zag around, following any possible geometrical line if necessary. I don’t admire those who have every step and thought mapped out to the point where they can say, “Tomorrow I’ll make three calls, write four letters, and finish this or that task.” My mind is so open to all kinds of ideas, tastes, and feelings; it eagerly absorbs whatever comes its way that... but why should it miss out on the pleasures scattered along life's tough journey? They are so rare that it would be foolish not to pause and even divert to gather those that are within reach. Among these joys, I think none is more appealing than letting your imagination roam like a hunter pursues game, without intending to follow any specific path. So, when I wander in my room, I rarely move in a straight line. From my table, I head toward a picture in the corner; then I move at an angle toward the door; and although I initially intended to return to my table, if I happen to pass by my armchair, I immediately and unceremoniously settle into it. By the way, what a great piece of furniture an armchair is, especially how convenient it is for a contemplative person. On long winter evenings, it’s often nice, and always wise, to stretch out in it, away from the hustle and bustle of crowded gatherings. A good fire, some books and pens—what a safeguard they are against ennui! And how delightful it is to forget about books and pens to stoke the fire while indulging in pleasant thoughts, or putting together a few rhymes to entertain friends as the hours slip away and fade into eternity, barely feeling their sad passage.{14}
V.
The Bed.
NEXT to my arm-chair, as we go northward, my bed comes into sight. It is placed at the end of my room, and forms the most agreeable perspective. It is very pleasantly situated, and the earliest rays of the sun play upon my curtains. On fine summer days I see them come creeping, as the sun rises, all along the whitened wall. The elm-trees opposite my windows divide them into a thousand patterns as they dance upon my bed, and, reflecting its rose-and-white color, shed a charming tint around. I hear the confused twitter of the swallows that have taken possession of my roof, and the warbling of the birds that people the elms.{15} Then do a thousand smiling fancies fill my soul; and in the whole universe no being enjoys an awakening so delightful, so peaceful, as mine.
NEXT to my armchair, as we head north, my bed comes into view. It's placed at the end of my room and offers the most pleasant perspective. It's positioned perfectly, with the first rays of the sun shining on my curtains. On beautiful summer days, I watch them slowly creep in as the sun rises, illuminating the pale wall. The elm trees outside my windows create a dance of shadows all over my bed, reflecting its rose-and-white colors and casting a lovely hue around. I can hear the cheerful chirping of the swallows that have taken over my roof, along with the songs of the birds in the elms. {15} In those moments, a thousand joyful thoughts fill my mind, and no one in the universe has a morning so delightful and peaceful as mine.
I confess that I do indeed revel in these sweet moments, and prolong as far as I can the pleasure it gives me to meditate in the comfortable warmth of my bed. What scene can adapt itself so well to the imagination, and awaken such delicious ideas, as the couch on which my fancy floats me into the forgetfulness of self! Here it is that the mother, intoxicated with joy at the birth of a son, forgets her pangs. Hither it is that fantastic pleasures, the fruit of fancy or of hope, come to agitate us. In a word, it is here that during one half of a life-time we forget the annoyances of the other half.
I admit that I truly enjoy these sweet moments and stretch out the pleasure I get from relaxing in the cozy warmth of my bed for as long as I can. What setting can inspire my imagination and spark such delightful thoughts better than the couch that allows me to escape from myself? Here, a mother, filled with joy at the birth of her son, forgets her pain. Here, the whimsical pleasures, born from imagination or hope, come to stir us. In short, this is where we forget the frustrations of one half of our life during the other half.
But what a host of thoughts, some agreeable, some sad, throng my brain at once,—strange minglings of terrible and delicious pictures!{16}
But what a flood of thoughts, some pleasant, some sorrowful, crowd my mind all at once—bizarre combinations of terrifying and delightful images!{16}
A bed sees us born, and sees us die. It is the ever changing scene upon which the human race play by turns interesting dramas, laughable farces, and fearful tragedies. It is a cradle decked with flowers. A throne of love. A sepulchre.{17}
A bed witnesses our birth and our death. It’s the ever-changing stage where humanity puts on fascinating dramas, humorous comedies, and heartbreaking tragedies. It’s a cradle adorned with flowers. A throne of love. A final resting place.{17}
VI.
For Metaphysicians.
THIS chapter is for metaphysicians, and for metaphysicians only. It will throw a great light upon man’s nature. It is the prism with which to analyze and decompose the human faculties, by separating the animal force from the pure rays of intellect.
THIS chapter is for metaphysicians, and for metaphysicians only. It will shed a lot of light on human nature. It’s the tool to analyze and break down human abilities by separating instinctual drives from pure intellectual insights.
It would be impossible for me to explain how I came to burn my fingers at the very onset of my journey without expounding to my reader my system of the Soul and the Animal.[1] And besides, this metaphysical discovery has so great an influ{18}ence on my thoughts and actions, that it would be very difficult to understand this book if I did not begin by giving the key to its meaning.
It would be impossible for me to explain how I ended up burning my fingers right at the beginning of my journey without first sharing my understanding of the Soul and the Animal.[1] Plus, this metaphysical discovery has such a significant impact on my thoughts and actions that it would be hard to grasp this book without starting with the key to its meaning.
Various observations have enabled me to perceive that man is made up of a soul and an animal. These two beings are quite distinct, but they are so dovetailed one into the other, or upon the other, that the soul must, if we would make the distinction between them, possess a certain superiority over the animal.
Various observations have led me to understand that a person is made up of a soul and a body. These two aspects are quite different, but they are so intertwined that the soul must, if we want to make a distinction between them, hold a certain superiority over the body.
I have it from an old professor (and this is as long ago as I can remember), that Plato used to call matter the OTHER. This is all very well; but I prefer giving this name par excellence to the animal which is joined to our soul. This substance it is which is really the OTHER, and which plays such strange tricks upon us. It is easy enough to see, in a sort of general way, that man is twofold. But this, they say, is{19} because he is made up of soul and body; and they accuse the body of I don’t know how many things, and very inconsistently, seeing that it can neither feel nor think. It is upon the animal that the blame should fall; upon that sensitive being, which, while it is perfectly distinct from the soul, is a real individual, enjoying a separate existence, with its own tastes, inclinations, and will, and which only ranks higher than other animals, because it is better educated than they, and is provided with more perfect organs.
I heard from an old professor (and this goes back as far as I can remember) that Plato used to refer to matter as the OTHER. That’s fine, but I prefer to give that title par excellence to the being that’s connected to our soul. This substance is really the OTHER, and it plays such strange tricks on us. It’s pretty clear, in a general sense, that humans are twofold. But they say this is{19} because we're made up of soul and body; and they blame the body for who knows how many things, which is inconsistent, considering it can neither feel nor think. The blame should rest on the animal aspect; on that sensitive being, which, while completely distinct from the soul, is a real individual, living a separate life, with its own preferences, inclinations, and will. It only ranks higher than other animals because it is better educated than they are and has more refined organs.
Ladies and gentlemen! Be as proud of your intellect as you please, but be very suspicious of the OTHER, especially when you are together.
Ladies and gentlemen! Take pride in your smarts as much as you want, but be very wary of the OTHER, especially when you're together.
I have experimented I know not how oft, upon the union of these two heterogeneous creatures. I have, for instance, clearly ascertained that the soul can make herself obeyed by the animal, and that, by way of{20} retaliation, the animal makes the soul act contrary to its own inclination. The one, as a rule, has the legislative, the other the executive power, but these two are often at variance. The great business of a man of genius is to train his animal well, in order that it may go alone, while the soul, delivered from this troublesome companion, can raise herself to the skies.
I have experimented more times than I can count with the combination of these two different beings. For example, I've clearly found that the soul can command the animal, and in return, the animal can make the soul act against its own wishes. Typically, the soul has the power to create rules, while the animal carries them out, but these two often conflict. The main job of a person with talent is to train their animal well so that it can operate independently, allowing the soul to rise above this difficult companion.
But this requires illustration. When, sir, you are reading a book, and an agreeable idea suddenly enters your imagination, your soul attaches herself to the new idea at once, and forgets the book, while your eyes follow mechanically the words and lines. You get through the page without understanding it, and without remembering what you have read. Now this is because your soul, having ordered her companion to read to her, gave no warning of the short absence she contemplated, so that the OTHER went on reading what the soul no longer attended to.{21}
But this needs an example. When you’re reading a book and a nice idea suddenly pops into your head, your mind immediately latches onto that idea, making you forget the book, while your eyes just keep scanning the words and lines. You finish the page without really understanding it or remembering what you read. This happens because your mind, having asked its companion to read for it, didn’t signal that it was going to zone out for a bit, so the OTHER kept reading, even though your mind wasn’t paying attention anymore.{21}
VII.
The Soul.
IS not this clear to you? Let us illustrate it still farther.
IIsn’t this clear to you? Let’s explain it even more.
One day last summer at an appointed hour, I was wending my way to court. I had been sketching all day, and my soul, choosing to meditate upon painting, left the duty of taking me to the king’s palace to the animal.
One day last summer at a set time, I was making my way to court. I had been drawing all day, and as I focused on painting, I let the animal handle getting me to the king’s palace.
How sublime, thought my soul, is the painter’s art! Happy is he who is touched by the aspect of nature, and does not depend upon his pictures for a livelihood; who does not paint solely as a pastime, but struck with the majesty of a beautiful form, and the wonderful way in which the light with its thousand tints plays upon the{22} human face, strives to imitate in his works the wonderful effects of nature! Happy, too, is the painter who is led by love of landscape into solitary paths, and who can make his canvas breathe the feeling of sadness with which he is inspired by a gloomy wood or a desert plain. His productions imitate and reproduce nature. He creates new seas and dark caverns into which the sun has never peered. At his command, coppices of evergreens spring into life, and the blue of heaven is reflected on his pictures. He darkens the air, and we hear the roar of the storm. At another time he presents to the eye of the wondering beholder the delightful plains of ancient Sicily: startled nymphs flee the pursuit of a satyr through the bending reeds; temples of stately architecture raise their grand fronts above the sacred forest that surrounds them. Imagination loses itself among the still paths of this ideal country.{23} Bluish backgrounds blend with the sky, and the whole landscape, reproduced in the waters of a tranquil river, forms a scene that no tongue can describe.
How amazing, thought my soul, is the artist's craft! Blessed is the person who is inspired by the beauty of nature and doesn't rely on their artwork for survival; who doesn't paint just for fun, but feels the awe of a beautiful shape and the incredible way light dances over the{22} human face, striving to replicate in their creations the stunning effects of nature! Fortunate, too, is the painter who, motivated by a love for landscapes, wanders into quiet paths and can infuse their canvas with the sadness inspired by a dark forest or an empty plain. Their artwork imitates and recreates nature. They conjure up new seas and dark caves where sunlight has never shone. At their command, clusters of evergreens come alive, and the blue of the sky reflects in their paintings. They darken the atmosphere, and we hear the roar of a storm. At other times, they showcase the beautiful fields of ancient Sicily: startled nymphs flee from a satyr through the swaying reeds; grand temples rise majestically above the sacred forest around them. Imagination gets lost within the peaceful paths of this beautiful land.{23} Shades of blue merge with the sky, and the entire landscape, mirrored in the calm waters of a quiet river, creates a scene that words cannot capture.
While my soul was thus reflecting, the other went its way, Heaven knows whither! Instead of going to court, according to orders, it took such a turn to the left, that my soul just caught it up at Madame de Hautcastel’s door, full half a mile from the Palais Royal!
While my soul was deep in thought, the other went its own way, who knows where! Instead of heading to court as instructed, it took a detour to the left, and my soul managed to catch up with it at Madame de Hautcastel’s door, a good half a mile from the Palais Royal!
Now I leave the reader to fancy what might have been the consequence had the truant visited so beautiful a lady alone.{24}
Now I let the reader imagine what could have happened if the runaway had visited such a beautiful lady alone.{24}
VIII.
The Animal.
IF it is both useful and agreeable to have a soul so disengaged from matter that we can let it travel alone whenever we please, this has also its disadvantages. Through this, for instance, I got the burn I spoke of a few chapters back.
IF it's both helpful and enjoyable to have a soul that's so separate from the physical world that we can let it wander off whenever we want, there are also downsides to this. For example, that's how I ended up with the burn I mentioned a few chapters ago.
I generally leave my animal to prepare my breakfast. Its care it is to slice and toast my bread. My coffee it makes admirably, and helps itself thereto without my soul’s concerning herself in the transaction. But this is a very rare and nice performance to execute; for though it is easy enough while busied in a mechanical operation, to think of something quite different, it is extremely difficult, so to speak, to{25} watch one’s self-work, or, if I express myself systematically, to employ one’s soul to examine the animal’s progress, and to watch its work without taking part in it. This is the most extraordinary metaphysical feat a man can execute.
I usually let my pet make my breakfast. Its job is to slice and toast my bread. It makes my coffee perfectly and helps itself without me having to worry about it. But this is a very rare and impressive skill to have; because while it's easy to think about something completely different when you're doing a mechanical task, it's really hard, so to speak, to{25} pay attention to your own work, or to put it more formally, to use your mind to observe the animal’s progress and watch it work without getting involved. This is the most remarkable mental feat a person can accomplish.
I had rested my tongs on the embers to toast my bread, and some little time afterwards, while my soul was travelling, a burning stick fell on the hearth: my poor animal seized the tongs, and I burnt my fingers.{26}
I had set my tongs on the hot coals to toast my bread, and a little while later, while I was distracted, a burning stick fell onto the fireplace: my poor pet grabbed the tongs, and I burned my fingers.{26}
IX.
Philosophy.
I HOPE I have sufficiently developed my ideas in the foregoing chapters to furnish you, good reader, with matter for thought, and to enable you to make discoveries along the brilliant career before you. You cannot be other than highly satisfied with yourself if you succeed in the long run in making your soul travel alone. The pleasure afforded by this power will amply counterbalance any inconvenience that may arise from it. What more flattering delight is there than the being able thus to expand one’s existence, to occupy at once earth and heaven, to double, so to speak, one’s being? Is it not man’s eternal, insatiable desire to augment his strength and{27} his faculties, to be where he is not, to recall the past, and live in the future? He would fain command armies, preside over learned societies, and be the idol of the fair. And, if he attain to all this, then he regrets the tranquillity of a rural life, and envies the shepherd’s cot. His plans, his hopes, are constantly foiled by the ills that flesh is heir to. He can find happiness nowhere. A quarter of an hour’s journey with me will show him the way to it.
I HOPE I have clearly explained my ideas in the previous chapters to give you, dear reader, something to think about and help you make discoveries on the exciting journey ahead. You can't help but feel proud of yourself if, in the end, you manage to let your soul travel independently. The joy that comes from this ability will easily outweigh any drawbacks that might come with it. What could be more delightful than being able to expand your existence, to simultaneously inhabit both earth and heaven, to essentially double your being? Isn't it humanity's endless, insatiable desire to increase his strength and{27} his abilities, to be where he isn't, to recall the past, and live in the future? He longs to command armies, lead prestigious societies, and be the object of admiration. Yet, if he achieves all this, he still yearns for the peace of a countryside life and envies the shepherd's humble home. His plans and hopes are always thwarted by the troubles that come with being human. He finds happiness nowhere. A short journey with me will show him the way to it.
Ah, why does he not leave to the OTHER those carking cares and that tormenting ambition. Come, my poor friend! Make but an effort to burst from thy prison, and from the height of heaven, whither I am about to lead thee, from the midst of the celestial shades, from the empyrean itself, behold thy animal run along the road to fortune and honor. See with what gravity it walks among men. The crowd falls back with respect, and believe me, none will remark{28} that it is alone. The people among whom it walks care very little whether it has a soul or not, whether it thinks or not. A thousand sentimental women will fall desperately in love with it without discovering the defect. It may even raise itself without thy soul’s help to the highest favor and fortune. Nay, I should not be astonished if, on thy return from the empyrean, thy soul, on getting home, were to find itself in the animal of a noble lord.{29}
Ah, why doesn't he leave those nagging worries and that tormenting ambition to the OTHER? Come on, my poor friend! Just make an effort to break free from your prison, and from the heights of heaven, where I'm about to take you, from the midst of the celestial realms, from the very heavens, watch your animal make its way along the path to fortune and honor. See how seriously it carries itself among people. The crowd steps back with respect, and believe me, no one will notice{28} that it is alone. The people who surround it really couldn't care less whether it has a soul or not, whether it thinks or not. A thousand sentimental women will fall head over heels in love with it without realizing the flaw. It may even rise on its own, without your soul's assistance, to the highest levels of favor and success. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if, upon your return from the heavens, your soul, arriving home, found itself in the animal of a noble lord.{29}
X.
The Portrait.
BUT you must not let yourself think that instead of keeping my promise to describe my journey round my room, I am beating the bush to see how I can evade the difficulty. This would be a great mistake on your part. For our journey is really going on; and while my soul, falling back on her own resources, was in the last chapter threading the mazy paths of metaphysics, I had so placed myself in my arm-chair, that its front legs being raised about two inches from the floor, I was able, by balancing myself from left to right, to make way by degrees, and at last, almost without knowing it, to get close to the wall, for this is how I travel when not{30} pressed for time. When there, my hand possessed itself by a mere mechanical effort, of the portrait of Madame de Hautcastel; and the OTHER amused itself with removing the dust which covered it. This occupation produced a feeling of quiet pleasure, and the pleasure was conveyed to my soul, lost though it was in the vast plains of heaven. For it is well to observe that when the mind is thus travelling in space, it still keeps linked to the senses by a secret and subtle chain; so that, without being distracted from its occupations, it can participate in the peaceful joys of the OTHER. But should this pleasure reach a certain pitch, or should the soul be struck by some unexpected vision, it forthwith descends swift as lightning, and resumes its place.
BUT you shouldn't think that instead of keeping my promise to describe my journey around my room, I'm just stalling to avoid the challenge. That's a big mistake on your part. Our journey is truly happening; while my mind was busy diving into complex ideas in the last chapter, I had positioned myself in my armchair in such a way that its front legs were raised about two inches off the ground. By leaning side to side, I was able to gradually move and almost without realizing it, get close to the wall, which is how I travel when I'm not {30} pressed for time. Once there, my hand mechanically found the portrait of Madame de Hautcastel, and the OTHER busied itself with brushing off the dust that covered it. This activity brought a sense of quiet pleasure, which reached my soul, even though it was wandering in the vastness of the heavens. It’s important to note that while the mind is traveling in this way, it remains connected to the senses by a subtle and secret link, allowing it to enjoy the peaceful joys of the OTHER without losing focus on its tasks. However, if this pleasure becomes too intense, or if the soul encounters some sudden vision, it quickly returns as fast as lightning to its original place.
And that is just what happened to me while dusting the picture. Whilst the cloth removed the dust, and brought to{31} light those flaxen curls and the wreaths of roses that crowned them, my soul, from the sun, whither she had transported herself, felt a slight thrill of pleasure, and partook sympathetically of the joy of my heart. This joy became less indistinct and more lively, when, by a single sweep, the beautiful forehead of that charming face was revealed. My soul was on the point of leaving the skies in order to enjoy the spectacle. But had she been in the Elysian Fields, had she been engaged in a seraphic concert, she could not have stayed a single second longer when her companion, glowing with the work, seized a proffered sponge, and passed it at once over the eyebrows and the eyes, over the nose, over that mouth, ah heavens!—my heart beats at the thought—over the chin and neck! It was the work of an instant. The whole face seemed suddenly recalled into existence. My soul precipitated herself like a{32} falling star from the sky. She found the OTHER in a state of ecstasy, which she herself increased by sharing it. This strange and unexpected position caused all thought of time and space to vanish from my mind. I lived for a moment in the past, and, contrary to the order of nature, I grew young again. Yes, before me stands that adored one; ’tis she, her very self! She smiles on me, she will speak and own her love. That glance!... come, let me press thee to my heart, O, my loved one, my other self! Partake with me this intoxicating bliss! The moment was short, but ravishing. Cool reason soon reasserted her sway, and in the twinkling of an eye I had grown a whole year older. My heart grew icy cold, and I found myself on a level with the crowd of heedless ones who throng the earth.{33}
And that’s exactly what happened to me while I was dusting the picture. As the cloth wiped away the dust and revealed those golden curls and the rose garlands that adorned them, my soul, having transported itself to the sun, felt a slight thrill of pleasure and shared in the joy of my heart. This joy became clearer and more vibrant when, with a single swipe, the beautiful forehead of that lovely face came into view. My soul was about to leave the sky to fully enjoy the sight. But even if she had been in the Elysian Fields, engaged in a serene concert, she couldn’t have stayed even a second longer when her companion, eager for the task, grabbed a sponge and immediately swept it over the eyebrows and eyes, the nose, that mouth—oh heavens!—my heart races at the thought—over the chin and neck! It all happened in an instant. The entire face suddenly seemed to come back to life. My soul plunged down like a falling star from the sky. She found the OTHER in a state of ecstasy, which she herself amplified by sharing it. This strange and unexpected moment made all thoughts of time and space disappear from my mind. I lived for a moment in the past and, against the natural order, I felt myself growing young again. Yes, standing before me is that beloved one; it’s her, exactly! She smiles at me, she will speak and claim her love. That gaze!... come, let me hold you close to my heart, oh my love, my other half! Join me in this intoxicating bliss! The moment was brief, but enchanting. Cool reason quickly regained control, and in the blink of an eye, I was a whole year older. My heart felt icy cold, and I found myself at the same level as the sea of indifferent souls who fill the earth.{33}
XI.
Rose and White.
BUT we must not anticipate events. My hurry to communicate to the reader my system of the soul and animal caused me to abandon the description of my bed earlier than I ought to have done. When I have completed this description, I will continue my journey where I interrupted it in the last chapter. But let me pray you to bear in mind that we left one half of my ego four steps from my bureau, close to the wall, and holding the portrait of Madame de Hautcastel.
BUT we shouldn't rush things. My eagerness to share my ideas about the soul and animals made me skip over describing my bed sooner than I should have. Once I finish that description, I'll pick up my story where I left off in the last chapter. But please remember that we left part of my ego just four steps away from my desk, next to the wall, holding the portrait of Madame de Hautcastel.
In speaking of my bed, I forgot to recommend every man to have, if possible, a bed with rose and white furniture. There can be no doubt that colors so far affect us as{34} to make us cheerful or sad, according to their hues. Now, rose and white are two colors that are consecrated to pleasure. Nature in bestowing them upon the rose has given her the crown of Flora’s realm. And when the sky would announce to the world a fine day, it paints the clouds at sunrise with this charming tint.
When talking about my bed, I forgot to suggest that every man should have, if possible, a bed with pink and white furniture. There’s no doubt that colors influence us enough{34} to make us feel cheerful or sad, depending on their shades. Pink and white are two colors dedicated to pleasure. Nature has given the rose these colors, making it the crown jewel of Flora’s kingdom. And when the sky wants to signal a beautiful day to the world, it paints the clouds at sunrise with this lovely hue.
One day we were with some difficulty climbing a steep pathway. The amiable Rosalie, whose agility had given her wings, was far in front. We could not overtake her. All on a sudden, having reached the top of a hillock, she turned toward us to take breath, and smiled at our slowness. Never, perhaps, did the two colors whose praise I proclaim so triumph. Her burning cheeks, her coral lips, her alabaster neck, were thrown into relief by the verdure around, and entranced us all. We could not but pause and gaze upon her. I will not speak of her blue eyes, or of the glance{35} she cast upon us, because this would be going from the subject, and because I dwell upon these memories as little as possible. Let it suffice that I have given the best illustration conceivable of the superiority of these two colors over all others, and of their influence upon the happiness of man.
One day we were struggling to climb a steep path. The friendly Rosalie, whose agility made her seem like she had wings, was far ahead of us. We couldn’t catch up to her. Suddenly, when she reached the top of a small hill, she turned to catch her breath and smiled at how slow we were. Perhaps it was a moment when the two colors I’m praising truly triumphed. Her flushed cheeks, coral lips, and alabaster neck stood out against the greenery around her, captivating us all. We couldn’t help but stop and stare at her. I won’t talk about her blue eyes or the look she gave us, because that would divert from the topic, and I try not to dwell on these memories too much. It’s enough to say that I’ve provided the best example possible of how these two colors surpass all others and how they contribute to human happiness.
Here will I stop for to-day. Of what subject can I treat which would not now be insipid? What idea is not effaced by this idea? I do not even know when I shall be able to resume my work. If I go on with it at all, and if the reader desire to see its termination, let him betake himself to the angel who distributes thoughts, and beg him to cease to mingle with the disconnected thoughts he showers upon me at every moment the image of that hillock.
Here is where I’ll stop for today. What topic can I discuss that wouldn’t feel dull now? What thought isn’t overshadowed by this thought? I’m not even sure when I’ll be able to continue my work. If I decide to keep going, and if the reader wants to see how it ends, they should go to the angel who hands out ideas and ask him to stop mixing that hill into the random thoughts he throws my way every moment.
If this precaution is not taken, my journey will be a failure.{36}
If I don't take this precaution, my trip will be a disaster.{36}
XII.
The Hillock.
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XIII.
A Halt.
MY efforts are useless. I must sojourn here awhile, whether I will or not. The “Halt!” is irresistible.{38}
MY efforts are pointless. I have to stay here for a while, whether I like it or not. The “Stop!” is unavoidable.{38}
XIV.
Joannetti.
I REMARKED that I was singularly fond of meditating when influenced by the agreeable warmth of my bed; and that its agreeable color added not a little to the pleasure I experienced.
I NOTICED that I was especially fond of thinking deeply when wrapped up in the cozy warmth of my bed; and that its nice color added a lot to the enjoyment I felt.
That I may be provided with this enjoyment, my servant is directed to enter my room half an hour before my time for rising. I hear him moving about my room with a light step, and stealthily managing his preparations. This noise just suffices to convey to me the pleasant knowledge that I am slumbering,—a delicate pleasure this, unknown to most men. You are just awake enough to know you are not entirely so, and to make a dreamy calculation that{39} the hour for business and worry is still in the sand-glass of time. Gradually my man grows noisier; it is so hard for him to restrain himself, and he knows too that the fatal hour draws near. He looks at my watch, and jingles the seals as a warning. But I turn a deaf ear to him. There is no imaginable cheat I do not put upon the poor fellow to lengthen the blissful moment. I give him a hundred preliminary orders. He knows that these orders, given somewhat peevishly, are mere excuses for my staying in bed without seeming to wish to do so. But this he affects not to see through, and I am truly thankful to him.
To make sure I can enjoy this time, I've told my servant to come into my room half an hour before I normally get up. I hear him moving around quietly, carefully preparing things. This little noise is enough to let me know that I'm still dozing, which is a subtle pleasure that most people don't experience. You're just alert enough to realize you're not fully awake, and you can lazily calculate that the time for work and stress is still slipping away in the hourglass. Gradually, my servant gets louder; it’s hard for him to hold back, and he knows that the dreaded hour is approaching. He checks my watch and jingles the seals as a signal. But I ignore him. I pull every conceivable trick on the poor guy to extend this delightful moment. I give him a bunch of preliminary orders. He knows that these somewhat grumpy requests are just my way of staying in bed without openly wanting to do so. But he pretends not to figure it out, and I’m genuinely grateful to him.
At last, when I have exhausted all my resources, he advances to the middle of the room, and with folded arms, plants himself there in a perfectly immovable position. It must be admitted that it would be impossible to show disapproval of my idleness with greater judgment and address. I{40} never resist this tacit invitation, but, stretching out my arms to show I understand him, get up at once.
At last, when I’ve run out of all my options, he steps into the middle of the room and, with his arms crossed, stands there completely still. It’s clear that he couldn’t disapprove of my laziness in a more thoughtful and sophisticated way. I{40} can never ignore this unspoken invitation, so I stretch out my arms to show I understand him and get up right away.
If the reader will reflect upon the behavior of my servant, he will convince himself that in certain delicate matters of this kind, simplicity and good sense are much better than the sharpest wit. I dare assert that the most studied discourse on the impropriety of sloth would not make me spring so readily from my bed as the silent reproach of Monsieur Joannetti.
If you think about the behavior of my servant, you'll realize that in certain sensitive situations like this, simplicity and common sense are far better than the cleverest wit. I can confidently say that no elaborate speech on the wrongness of laziness would get me out of bed as quickly as the quiet disapproval of Monsieur Joannetti.
This Monsieur Joannetti is a thoroughly honest fellow, and at the same time just the man for such a traveller as I. He is accustomed to the frequent journeys of my soul, and never laughs at the inconsistencies of the OTHER. He even directs it occasionally when it is alone, so that one might say it is then conducted by two souls. When it is dressing, for instance, he will warn it by a gesture that it is on the point of put{41}ting on its stockings the wrong way, or its coat before its waistcoat.
This Monsieur Joannetti is a completely honest guy, and he's exactly the right person for a traveler like me. He's used to my wandering spirit and never makes fun of the oddities of the OTHER. He even guides it sometimes when it’s on its own, so you could say it’s then managed by two souls. For example, when it’s getting ready, he’ll signal with a gesture if it’s about to put{41} its stockings on the wrong way or its coat before its waistcoat.
Many a time has my soul been amused at seeing poor Joannetti running after this foolish creature under the arches of the citadel, to remind it of a forgotten hat or handkerchief. One day, I must confess, had it not been for this faithful servant, who caught it up just at the bottom of the staircase, the silly creature would have presented itself at court without a sword, as boldly as if it had been the chief gentleman-usher, bearing the august rod.{42}
Many times, I've found it amusing to see poor Joannetti chasing after this foolish person under the arches of the citadel, trying to remind them about a lost hat or handkerchief. One day, I must admit, if it hadn't been for this loyal servant who picked it up right at the bottom of the staircase, the silly person would have shown up at court without a sword, acting as confidently as if they were the chief gentleman-usher, carrying the important rod.{42}
XV.
A Difficulty.
“COME, Joannetti,” I said, “hang up this picture.” He had helped to clean it, and had no more notion than the man in the moon what had produced our chapter on the portrait. He it was, who, of his own accord, held out the wet sponge, and who, through that seemingly unimportant act, caused my soul to travel a hundred millions of leagues in a moment of time. Instead of restoring it to its place, he held it to examine it in his turn. A difficulty, a problem, gave him an inquisitive air, which I did not fail to observe.
“Come on, Joannetti,” I said, “hang up this picture.” He had helped to clean it and had no idea at all what led to our discussion about the portrait. It was him who, without being asked, held out the wet sponge and, through that seemingly small act, made my mind wander a hundred million miles in a split second. Instead of putting it back in its place, he held it up to take a closer look. A challenge, a puzzle, gave him a curious look, which I noticed right away.
“Well, and what fault do you find with that portrait?” said I.
“Well, what do you find wrong with that portrait?” I said.
“But come now, you have some remark to make, I know.”
“But come on, I know you have something to say.”
He placed it upright on one of the wings of my bureau, and then drawing back a little, “I wish, sir,” he said, “that you would explain how it is that in whatever part of the room one may be, this portrait always watches you. In the morning, when I am making your bed, the face turns towards me; and if I move toward the window, it still looks at me, and follows me with its eyes as I go about.”
He set it upright on one of the shelves of my dresser, and then stepping back a bit, he said, “I wish, sir, you would explain how it is that no matter where you are in the room, this portrait always seems to be watching you. In the morning, when I’m making your bed, the face turns towards me; and if I move towards the window, it still seems to look at me and follows me with its eyes as I move around.”
“So that, Joannetti,” said I, “if my room were full of people, that beautiful lady would eye every one, on all sides, at once.”
“So, Joannetti,” I said, “if my room were packed with people, that beautiful lady would be watching everyone from every angle, all at the same time.”
“Just so, sir.”
"Exactly, sir."
“She would smile on every comer and goer, just as she would on me?”
“She would smile at everyone who came and went, just like she did for me?”
Joannetti gave no further answer. I stretched myself in my easy-chair, and, hanging down my head, gave myself up to the most serious meditations. What a ray{44} of light fell upon me! Alack, poor lover! While thou pinest away, far from thy mistress, at whose side another perhaps, has already replaced thee; whilst thou fixest thy longing eyes on her portrait, imagining that at least in picture, thou art the sole being she deigns to regard,—the perfidious image, as faithless as the original, bestows its glances on all around, and smiles on every one alike!
Joannetti didn’t say anything more. I settled back in my easy chair, hung my head, and lost myself in deep thought. What a spark{44} of insight hit me! Poor lover! While you suffer, away from your mistress, who might already have another by her side; as you gaze longingly at her portrait, thinking that at least in the picture, you’re the only one she notices—the treacherous image, as unfaithful as the real one, casts its gaze on everyone around and smiles at all just the same!
And in this behold a moral resemblance between certain portraits and their originals, which no philosopher, no painter, no observer, had before remarked.
And here’s a moral similarity between certain portraits and their originals that no philosopher, painter, or observer had pointed out before.
XVI.
Solution.
JOANNETTI remained in the attitude I have described, awaiting the explanation he had asked of me. I withdrew my head from the folds of my travelling dress, into which I had thrust it that I might meditate more at my ease; and after a moment’s silence, to enable me to collect my thoughts after the reflections I had just made, I said, turning my arm-chair toward him,—
JOANNETTI stayed in the position I mentioned, waiting for the explanation he had asked for. I pulled my head out of the folds of my travel dress, where I had tucked it in to think more comfortably; and after a brief silence to gather my thoughts from the reflections I had just had, I said, turning my armchair toward him,—
“Do you not see that as a picture is a plane surface, the rays of light proceeding from each point on that surface ...?”
“Don't you see that just like a picture is a flat surface, the rays of light coming from each point on that surface ...?”
At that explanation, Joannetti stretched{46} his eyes to their very widest, while he kept his mouth half open. These two movements of the human face express, according to the famous Le Brun, the highest pitch of astonishment. It was, without doubt, my animal, that had undertaken this dissertation, while my soul was well aware that Joannetti knew nothing whatever about plane surfaces and rays of light. The prodigious dilatation of his eyelids caused me to draw back. I ensconced my head in the collar of my travelling coat, and this so effectively that I well-nigh succeeded in altogether hiding it. I determined to dine where I was. The morning was far advanced, and another step in my room would have delayed my dinner until night-fall. I let myself slip to the edge of my chair, and putting both feet on the mantel-piece, patiently awaited my meal. This was a most comfortable attitude; indeed, it would be difficult to find another possessing so many{47} advantages, and so well adapted to the inevitable sojourns of a long voyage.
At that explanation, Joannetti widened{46} his eyes to their fullest while keeping his mouth half open. According to the famous Le Brun, these two expressions show the highest level of astonishment. Without a doubt, it was my animal that was making this speech, while my soul knew that Joannetti didn’t understand anything about plane surfaces and rays of light. The sheer expansion of his eyelids made me pull back. I buried my head in the collar of my travel coat, so much so that I nearly managed to hide it completely. I decided to have dinner where I was. It was already late morning, and moving to my room would have pushed dinner back until nightfall. I slid to the edge of my chair, put both feet on the mantelpiece, and patiently waited for my meal. It was a very comfortable position; in fact, it would be hard to find another that offered so many{47} benefits, especially suited for the unavoidable breaks during a long journey.
At such moments, Rose, my faithful dog, never fails to come and pull at the skirts of my travelling dress that I may take her up. She finds a very convenient ready-made bed at the angle formed by the two parts of my body. A V admirably represents my position. Rose jumps to her post if I do not take her up quickly enough to please her, and I often find her there without knowing how she has come. My hands fall into a position which minister to her well-being, and this, either through a sympathy existing between this good-natured creature and myself, or through the merest chance. But no, I do not believe in that miserable doctrine of chance,—in that unmeaning word! I would rather believe in animal magnetism.
At those times, Rose, my loyal dog, always comes over and tugs at the hem of my traveling dress, wanting me to pick her up. She finds a perfect spot to curl up right next to me. The shape of my body creates a V that suits her just fine. If I don’t pick her up quickly enough, she jumps up to her designated spot, and I often notice her there without realizing how she got there. My hands naturally fall into a position that seems to comfort her, and whether that's because of a connection between us or just luck, I can't say. But no, I don’t believe in that awful idea of chance—that empty term! I’d rather believe in animal magnetism.
There is such reality in the relations which exist between these two animals,{48} that when out of sheer distraction, I put my two feet on the mantel-piece and have no thought at all about a halt, dinner-time not being near, Rose, observing this movement, shows by a slight wag of her tail the pleasure she enjoys. Reserve keeps her in her place. The other perceives this and is gratified by it, though quite unable to reason upon its cause. And thus a mute dialogue is established between them, a pleasing interchange of sensations which could not be attributed to simple chance.{49}
There is such a real connection between these two animals,{48} that when I absentmindedly put my feet up on the mantel and don’t think about stopping, since dinner isn’t on my mind yet, Rose shows her enjoyment with a little wag of her tail. She holds back and stays in her spot. The other notices this and feels pleased by it, even though it can't understand why. So, a silent conversation forms between them, a nice exchange of feelings that can't just be chalked up to coincidence.{49}
XVII.
Rose.
DO not reproach me for the prolixity with which I narrate the details of my journey. This is the wont of travellers. When one sets out for the ascent of Mont Blanc, or to visit the yawning tomb of Empedocles, the minutest particulars are carefully described. The number of persons who formed the party, the number of mules, the quality of the food, the excellent appetite of the travellers,—everything, to the very stumbling of the quadrupeds, is carefully noted down for the instruction of the sedentary world.
Don't criticize me for the length with which I'm sharing the details of my journey. This is just how travelers are. When someone sets out to climb Mont Blanc or to see the gaping tomb of Empedocles, every little detail is meticulously described. The number of people in the group, the number of mules, the quality of the food, the travelers' great appetite—everything, even the stumbling of the pack animals, is carefully recorded for the benefit of those who stay at home.
Upon this principle, I resolved to speak of my dog Rose,—an amiable creature for{50} whom I entertain sincere regard,—and to devote a whole chapter to her.
Upon this principle, I decided to talk about my dog Rose—such a lovable creature for{50} whom I have genuine affection—and to dedicate an entire chapter to her.
We have lived together for six years, and there has never been any coolness between us, and if ever any little disputes have arisen, the fault has been chiefly on my side, and Rose has always made the first advances towards reconciliation.
We have lived together for six years, and there has never been any distance between us. Whenever small disagreements have popped up, it's mostly been my fault, and Rose has always been the one to reach out first to make up.
In the evening, if she has been scolded she withdraws sadly and without a murmur. The next morning at daybreak, she stands near my bed in a respectful attitude, and at her master’s slightest movement, at the first sign of his being awake, she makes her presence known by rapidly tapping my little table with her tail.
In the evening, if she's been scolded, she quietly withdraws, looking sad. The next morning at dawn, she stands by my bed in a respectful way, and at the slightest movement from me, at the first sign that I'm awake, she makes her presence known by quickly tapping my little table with her tail.
And why should I refuse my affection to this good-natured creature that has never ceased to love me ever since we have lived together? My memory would not enable me to enumerate all the people who have interested themselves in me but to forget{51} me. I have had some few friends, several lady-loves, a host of acquaintances; and now I am to all these people as if I had never lived; they have forgotten my very name.
And why should I deny my affection to this kind-hearted person who has loved me since we started living together? I can’t even remember all the people who have cared about me, but I can definitely remember how they’ve forgotten me. I’ve had a few friends, several romantic interests, and a lot of acquaintances; and now, to all of them, I might as well have never existed; they’ve forgotten my very name.
And yet what protestations they made, what offers of assistance! Their purse was at my disposal, and they begged me to depend upon their eternal and entire friendship!
And yet, what claims they made, what offers of help! Their money was at my disposal, and they urged me to rely on their constant and complete friendship!
Poor Rose, who has made me no promises, renders me the greatest service that can be bestowed upon humanity, for she has always loved her master, and loves him still. And this is why I do not hesitate to say that she shares with my other friends the affection I feel towards them.{52}
Poor Rose, who hasn’t made me any promises, does me the greatest favor anyone can offer, because she has always loved her master and still loves him. That’s why I’m not afraid to say that she shares the affection I have for my other friends.{52}
XVIII.
Reserve.
WE left Joannetti standing motionless before me, in an attitude of astonishment, awaiting the conclusion of the sublime explanation I had begun.
WE left Joannetti standing still in front of me, looking astonished, waiting for the end of the amazing explanation I had started.
When he saw me bury my head in my dressing-gown, and thus end my dissertation, he did not doubt for a moment that I had stopped short for lack of resources, and that he had fairly overcome me by the knotty question he had plied me with.
When he saw me hide my face in my robe, bringing my speech to a halt, he had no doubt that I had run out of ideas and that he had successfully stumped me with the tricky question he had asked.
Notwithstanding the superiority he had hereby gained over me, he felt no movement of pride, and did not seek to profit by his advantage. After a moment’s silence, he took the picture, put it back in its place, and withdrew softly on tip-toe. He felt{53} that his presence was a sort of humiliation to me, and his delicacy of feeling led him thus to retire unobserved. His behavior on this occasion interested me greatly, and gave him a higher place than ever in my affections. And he will have too, without doubt, a place in the heart of my readers. If there be one among them who will refuse it him after reading the next chapter, such a one must surely have a heart of stone.{54}
Even though he had gained the upper hand over me, he didn’t feel any pride and didn’t try to take advantage of the situation. After a brief silence, he picked up the picture, returned it to its spot, and quietly left on tiptoe. He sensed that his presence was somewhat humiliating for me, and his sensitivity led him to exit unnoticed. His actions during this moment really intrigued me and made me care for him even more. I’m sure he will also find a place in the hearts of my readers. If anyone among them refuses to accept him after reading the next chapter, that person must have a heart of stone.{54}
XIX.
A Tear.
“GOOD Heavens!” said I to him one day, “three times have I told you to buy me a brush. What a head the fellow has!” He answered not a word; nor had he the evening before made any reply to a like expostulation. “This is very odd,” I thought to myself, “he is generally so very particular.”
“Good heavens!” I said to him one day, “I've asked you three times to buy me a brush. What’s wrong with him?” He didn’t say a thing; nor did he respond the night before when I brought it up again. “This is really strange,” I thought to myself, “he's usually so particular.”
“Well, go and get a duster to wipe my shoes with,” I said angrily. While he was on his way, I regretted that I had spoken so sharply, and my anger entirely subsided when I saw how carefully he tried to remove the dust from my shoes without touching my stockings. “What,” I said to myself, “are there then men who brush{55} others’ shoes for money!” This word money came upon me like a flash of lightning. I suddenly remembered that for a long time my servant had not had any money from me.
“Well, go and get a duster to clean my shoes,” I said angrily. While he was on his way, I regretted speaking so harshly, and my anger faded completely when I saw how carefully he tried to wipe the dust off my shoes without touching my stockings. “What,” I thought, “are there really men who brush{55} other people’s shoes for money!” That word money hit me like a bolt of lightning. I suddenly remembered that my servant hadn't received any money from me in a long time.
“Joannetti,” said I, drawing away my foot, “have you any change?”
“Joannetti,” I said, pulling my foot back, “do you have any change?”
A smile of justification lit up his face at the question.
A smile of approval lit up his face at the question.
“No, sir; for the last week I have not possessed a penny. I have spent all I had for your little purchases.”
“No, sir; I haven't had a single penny for the last week. I spent all my money on your small purchases.”
“And the brush? I suppose that is why ...?”
“And the brush? I guess that’s why ...?”
He still smiled. Now, he might very well have said, “No, sir; I am not the empty-headed ass you would make out your faithful servant to be. Pay me the one pound two shillings and sixpence halfpenny you owe me, and then I’ll buy you your brush.” But no, he bore this ill treatment rather than cause his master to blush{56} at his unjust anger. And may Heaven bless him! Philosophers, Christians! have you read this?
He still smiled. Now, he could have easily said, “No, sir; I’m not the fool you think your loyal servant is. Pay me the one pound two shillings and sixpence halfpenny you owe me, and then I’ll buy you your brush.” But no, he put up with this mistreatment to avoid making his master feel embarrassed{56} for his unfair anger. And may Heaven bless him! Philosophers, Christians! Have you read this?
“Come, Joannetti,” said I, “buy me the brush.”
“Come on, Joannetti,” I said, “get me the brush.”
“But, sir, will you go like that, with one shoe clean, and the other dirty?”
“But, sir, are you really going to leave like that, with one shoe clean and the other dirty?”
“Go, go!” I replied, “never mind about the dust, never mind that.”
“Go, go!” I replied, “don’t worry about the dust, don’t worry about that.”
He went out. I took the duster, and daintily wiped my left shoe, on which a tear of repentance had fallen.{57}
He went out. I picked up the duster and carefully wiped my left shoe, where a tear of regret had landed.{57}
XX.
Albert and Charlotte.
THE walls of my room are hung with engravings and pictures, which adorn it greatly. I should much like to submit them to the reader’s inspection, that they might amuse him along the road we have to traverse before we reach my bureau. But it is as impossible to describe a picture well, as to paint one from a description.
THE walls of my room are decorated with engravings and pictures that enhance its appeal. I would really like to show them to the reader, so they can enjoy them during our journey to my desk. However, it’s just as impossible to describe an image effectively as it is to create one based on a description.
What an emotion he would feel in contemplating the first drawing that presents itself! He would see the unhappy Charlotte,[2] slowly, and with a trembling hand, wiping Albert’s pistols. Dark forebodings, and all the agony of hopeless, inconsolable love, are imprinted on her features, while{58} the cold-hearted Albert, surrounded by bags of law papers and various old documents, turns with an air of indifference towards his friend to bid him good-by. Many a time have I been tempted to break the glass that covers this engraving, that I might tear Albert away from the table, rend him to pieces, and trample him under foot. But this would not do away with the Alberts. There will always be sadly too many of them in the world. What sensitive man is there who has not such a one near him, who receives the overflowings of his soul, the gentle emotions of his heart, and the flights of his imagination just as the rock receives the waves of the sea? Happy is he who finds a friend whose heart and mind harmonize with his own; a friend who adheres to him by likeness of tastes, feeling, and knowledge; a friend who is not the prey of ambition or greediness, who prefers the shade of a tree to the pomp of a court! Happy is he who has a friend!{59}
What an emotion he would feel looking at the first drawing that comes to mind! He would see the unhappy Charlotte,[2] slowly, with trembling hands, wiping Albert’s pistols. Dark thoughts and all the pain of hopeless, inconsolable love are etched on her face, while{58} the cold-hearted Albert, surrounded by stacks of legal papers and various old documents, turns with indifference to say goodbye to his friend. Many times I've been tempted to smash the glass that covers this engraving, just to pull Albert away from the table, tear him apart, and trample him underfoot. But that wouldn't change the reality of Alberts. There will always be far too many of them in the world. What sensitive person hasn’t had one of these nearby, absorbing the overflow of his soul, the gentle feelings of his heart, and the flights of his imagination, just like a rock absorbs the waves of the sea? Happy is he who finds a friend whose heart and mind resonate with his own; a friend who connects with him through shared tastes, feelings, and knowledge; a friend not driven by ambition or greed, who prefers the shade of a tree over the splendor of a court! Happy is he who has a friend!{59}

XXI.
A Friend.
I HAD a friend. Death took him from me. He was snatched away at the beginning of his career, at the moment when his friendship had become a pressing need to my heart. We supported one another in the hard toil of war. We had but one pipe between us. We drank out of the same cup. We slept beneath the same tent. And, amid our sad trials, the spot where we lived together became to us a new father-land. I had seen him exposed to all the perils of a disastrous war. Death seemed to spare us to each other. His{60} deadly missives were exhausted around my friend a thousand times over without reaching him; but this was but to make his loss more painful to me. The tumult of war, and the enthusiasm which possesses the soul at the sight of danger might have prevented his sighs from piercing my heart, while his death would have been useful to his country, and damaging to the enemy. Had he died thus, I should have mourned him less. But to lose him amid the joys of our winter-quarters; to see him die at the moment when he seemed full of health, and when our intimacy was rendered closer by rest and tranquillity,—ah, this was a blow from which I can never recover!
I HAD a friend. Death took him from me. He was taken away right at the start of his career, just when I really needed his friendship. We supported each other through the tough times of war. We shared one pipe. We drank from the same cup. We slept under the same tent. And despite our sad challenges, the place where we lived together became a new home for us. I watched him face all the dangers of a disastrous war. Death seemed to keep us safe from each other. His{60} deadly attacks missed my friend countless times without harming him; but this only made his loss hurt more for me. The chaos of war and the excitement that comes with facing danger might have masked his sighs from reaching my heart, while his death would have been a sacrifice for his country and a loss for the enemy. If he had died that way, I would have mourned him less. But to lose him amid the joys of our winter quarters; to see him die when he seemed so healthy, and when our bond was strengthened by rest and calm—ah, that was a blow I can never recover from!
But his memory lives in my heart, and there alone. He is forgotten by those who surrounded him, and who have replaced him. And this makes his loss the more sad to me.
But his memory remains in my heart, and there only. He has been forgotten by those who were around him and who have taken his place. This makes his loss even sadder for me.
Nature, in like manner indifferent to the{61} fate of individuals, dons her green spring robe, and decks herself in all her beauty near the cemetery where he rests. The trees cover themselves with foliage, and intertwine their branches; the birds warble under the leafy sprays; the insects hum among the blossoms: everything breathes joy in this abode of death.
Nature, just as indifferent to the{61} fate of individuals, puts on her green spring dress and adorns herself in all her beauty near the cemetery where he rests. The trees are covered in leaves and their branches intertwine; the birds sing among the leafy boughs; the insects buzz around the flowers: everything feels joyful in this resting place of the dead.
And in the evening, when the moon shines in the sky, and I am meditating in this sad place, I hear the grasshopper, hidden in the grass that covers the silent grave of my friend, merrily pursuing his unwearied song. The unobserved destruction of human beings, as well as all their misfortunes, are counted for nothing in the grand total of events.
And in the evening, when the moon is shining in the sky, and I’m reflecting in this somber place, I hear the grasshopper, tucked away in the grass covering my friend's quiet grave, happily singing its endless song. The unnoticed loss of human lives, along with all their troubles, don’t really count in the grand scheme of things.
The death of an affectionate man who breathes his last surrounded by his afflicted friends, and that of a butterfly killed in a flower’s cup by the chill air of morning, are but two similar epochs in the course of na{62}ture. Man is but a phantom, a shadow, a mere vapor that melts into the air.
The death of a loving man who passes away surrounded by his grieving friends, and that of a butterfly snuffed out in a flower’s cup by the cold morning air, are just two similar moments in the cycle of na{62}ture. Man is just a phantom, a shadow, a mere vapor that fades into the air.
But day-break begins to whiten the sky. The gloomy thoughts that troubled me vanish with the darkness, and hope awakens again in my heart. No! He who thus suffuses the east with light, has not made it to shine upon my eyes only to plunge me into the night of annihilation. He who has spread out that vast horizon, who raised those lofty mountains whose icy tops the sun is even now gilding, is also He who made my heart to beat, and my mind to think.
But daybreak starts to lighten the sky. The gloomy thoughts that troubled me disappear with the darkness, and hope comes alive again in my heart. No! He who fills the east with light hasn’t done so just to blind me and throw me into the night of oblivion. He who stretched out that wide horizon, who raised those tall mountains with their icy peaks that the sun is now illuminating, is also the one who made my heart beat and my mind think.
No! My friend is not annihilated. Whatever may be the barrier that separates us, I shall see him again. My hopes are based on no mere syllogism. The flight of an insect suffices to persuade me. And often the prospect of the surrounding country, the perfume of the air, and an in{63}describable charm which is spread around me, so raise my thoughts, that an invincible proof of immortality forces itself upon my soul, and fills it to the full.{64}
No! My friend is not gone. No matter what stands between us, I will see him again. My hopes aren't just based on logic. Even the flight of an insect is enough to convince me. Also, the view of the landscape, the scent in the air, and an indescribable charm that surrounds me often elevate my thoughts, making the undeniable proof of immortality assert itself in my soul, filling me completely.
XXII.
Jenny.
THE chapter I have just written had often presented itself to my pen, but I had as often rejected it. I had promised myself that I would only allow the cheerful phase of my soul to show itself in this book. But this project, like many others, I was forced to abandon. I hope the sensitive reader will pardon me for having asked his tears; and if any one thinks I should have omitted this chapter, he can tear it from his copy, or even throw the whole book on the fire.
THE chapter I just wrote often came to mind, but I kept dismissing it. I had promised myself that I would only let the happy side of my soul appear in this book. However, like many other plans, I had to give this one up. I hope the sensitive reader forgives me for asking for their tears; and if anyone believes I should have left this chapter out, they can rip it from their copy or even toss the whole book into the fire.
Enough for me, dear Jenny, that thy heart approves it, thou best and best-beloved of women, best and best-beloved of sisters. To thee I dedicate my work. If{65} it please thee, it will please all gentle and delicate hearts. And if thou wilt pardon the follies into which, albeit against my will, I sometimes fall, I will brave all the critics of the universe.{66}
Enough for me, dear Jenny, that your heart approves it, you best and dearest of women, best and dearest of sisters. I dedicate my work to you. If{65} you’re pleased, it will please all kind and gentle hearts. And if you can forgive the mistakes I sometimes make, even though I don’t mean to, I will face all the critics in the world.{66}
XXIII.
The Picture Gallery.
ONE word only upon our next engraving.
ONCE we engrave the next one word only.
It represents the family of the unfortunate Ugolino, dying of hunger. Around him are his sons. One of them lies motionless at his feet. The rest stretch their enfeebled arms towards him, asking for bread; while the wretched father, leaning against a pillar of his prison, his eyes fixed and haggard, his countenance immovable, dies a double death, and suffers all that human nature can endure.
It shows the family of the unfortunate Ugolino, starving to death. His sons are gathered around him. One lies lifeless at his feet. The others reach out their weak arms toward him, begging for bread; while the despairing father, leaning against a pillar in his prison, with his eyes glazed and tired, his face expressionless, experiences a double death and endures all that a person can bear.
And there is the brave Chevalier d’Assas, dying, by an effort of courage and heroism unknown in our days, under a hundred bayonets.{67}
And there’s the brave Chevalier d’Assas, dying, through a level of courage and heroism we don’t see anymore, under a hundred bayonets.{67}
And thou who weepest under the palm-trees, poor negro woman! thou, whom some barbarous fellow has betrayed and deserted, nay, worse, whom he has had the brutality to sell as a vile slave, notwithstanding thy love and devotion, notwithstanding the pledge of affection thou hast borne at thy breast,—I will not pass before thine image without rendering to thee the homage due to thy tenderness and thy sorrows.
And you who are crying beneath the palm trees, poor Black woman! You, who some cruel man has betrayed and abandoned, and worse, who he has had the heartlessness to sell as a miserable slave, despite your love and loyalty, despite the promise of affection you've carried in your heart—I will not walk past your image without paying you the respect you deserve for your kindness and suffering.
Let us pause a moment before the other picture. It is a young shepherdess tending her flock alone on the heights of the Alps. She sits on an old willow trunk, bleached by many winters. Her feet are covered by the broad leaves of a tuft of cacalia, whose lilac blossoms bloom above her head. Lavender, wild thyme, the anemone, centaury, and flowers which are cultivated with care in our hot-houses and gardens, and which grow in all their native{68} beauty on the Alps, form the gay carpet on which her sheep wander.
Let’s take a moment to look at another scene. It’s a young shepherdess taking care of her flock alone in the Alps. She’s sitting on an old willow trunk, weathered by many winters. Her feet are nestled in the broad leaves of a clump of cacalia, with its lilac flowers blooming overhead. Lavender, wild thyme, anemones, centaury, and flowers that are usually grown with care in our greenhouses and gardens thrive in all their natural{68} beauty on the Alps, creating a colorful carpet for her sheep to roam.
Lovely shepherdess! tell me where is the lovely spot thou callest thy home. From what far-off sheepfold didst thou set out at daybreak this morning? Could I not go thither and live with thee?
Lovely shepherdess! Tell me where the beautiful place is that you call home. From which distant sheepfold did you leave at dawn this morning? Can I not go there and live with you?
But alas, the sweet tranquillity thou enjoyest will soon vanish! The demon of war, not content with desolating cities, will ere long carry anxiety and alarm to thy solitary retreat. Even now I see the soldiers advancing: they climb height after height, as they march upward towards the clouds. The cannons’ roar is heard high above the thunder-clap.
But sadly, the peace you’re enjoying will soon disappear! The demon of war, not satisfied with destroying cities, will soon bring anxiety and fear to your quiet refuge. Even now, I see the soldiers advancing: they scale hill after hill as they march up toward the clouds. The roar of the cannons is heard above the sound of thunder.
Fly, O shepherdess! Urge on thy flock! Hide thee in the farthest caves, for no longer is repose to be found on this sad earth!{69}
Fly, O shepherdess! Push your flock forward! Hide in the deepest caves, for there is no longer any rest to be found on this sad earth!{69}
XXIV.
Painting and Music.
I DO not know how it is, but of late my chapters have always ended in a mournful strain. In vain do I begin by fixing my eyes on some agreeable object; in vain do I embark when all is calm: a sudden gale soon drifts me away. To put an end to an agitation which deprives me of the mastery of my ideas, and to quiet the beating of a heart too much disturbed by so many touching images, I see no remedy but a dissertation. Yes, thus will I steel my heart.
I DON’T know what’s going on, but recently my chapters always wrap up on a sad note. No matter how hard I try to focus on something pleasant, or how calm the start is, a sudden storm quickly blows me off course. To end this turmoil that’s messing with my thoughts and to calm my heart, which is racing from all these moving images, I have no solution but to write an essay. Yes, that’s how I’ll toughen my heart.
I would say a few words, by the way, upon the question of preëminence between the charming arts of painting and music. I would cast my grain into the balance, were it but a grain of sand, a mere atom.
I would like to say a few words, by the way, on the question of superiority between the delightful arts of painting and music. I would add my small contribution to the discussion, even if it's just a grain of sand, a tiny speck.
It is urged in favor of the painter, that he leaves his works behind him; that his pictures outlive him, and immortalize his memory.
It is argued in favor of the painter that he leaves his work behind; that his pictures outlive him and keep his memory alive.
In reply to this we are reminded that musical composers also leave us their operas and oratorios.
In response to this, we are reminded that music composers also leave us their operas and oratorios.
But music is subject to fashion, and painting is not. The musical passages that deeply affected our forefathers seem{71} simply ridiculous to the amateurs of our own day; and they are placed in absurd farces to furnish laughter for the nephews of those whom they once made to weep.
But music follows trends, while painting doesn’t. The musical pieces that had a profound impact on our ancestors seem{71} totally silly to today's amateurs; they’re now featured in ridiculous comedies to make the descendants of those who once wept over them laugh.
Raphael’s pictures will enchant our descendants as greatly as they did our forefathers.
Raphael's artwork will captivate our future generations just like it did our ancestors.
XXV.
An Objection.
“BUT what,” said Madame de Hautcastel to me one day,—“what if the music of Cherubini or Cimarosa differs from that of their predecessors? What care I if the music of the past make me laugh, so long as that of the present day touch me by its charms? Is it at all essential to my happiness that my pleasures should resemble those of my great-grandmother? Why talk to me of painting, an art which is only enjoyed by a very small class of persons, while music enchants every living creature?”
"B"UT what,” Madame de Hautcastel said to me one day, “what if the music of Cherubini or Cimarosa is different from that of their predecessors? Why should I care if the music of the past makes me laugh, as long as the music of today moves me with its beauty? Is it really necessary for my happiness that my pleasures should be like those of my great-grandmother? Why talk to me about painting, an art appreciated only by a select few, when music captivates everyone alive?”
I hardly know at this moment how one could reply to this observation, which I did not foresee when I began my chapter.{73}
I barely know how to respond to this remark right now, which I didn't expect when I started my chapter.{73}
Had I foreseen it, perhaps I should not have undertaken that dissertation. And pray do not imagine that you discover in this objection the artifice of a musician, for upon my honor I am none, Heaven be my witness, and all those who have heard me play the violin!
Had I known it was going to turn out this way, maybe I shouldn't have taken on that dissertation. And please don't think that you find in this objection the trickery of a musician, because I swear I'm not one, I promise, and all those who have heard me play the violin can vouch for that!
But, even supposing the merits of the two arts to be equal, we must not be too hasty in concluding that the merits of the disciples of Painting and Music are therefore balanced. We see children play the harpsichord as if they were maestri, but no one has ever been a good painter at twelve years old. Painting, besides taste and feeling, requires an amount of thoughtfulness that musicians can dispense with. Any day may you hear men who are well nigh destitute of head and heart, bring out from a violin or harp the most ravishing sounds.
But even if the two arts are equally valuable, we shouldn’t jump to the conclusion that the skills of the disciples of Painting and Music are comparable. We see kids playing the harpsichord like they’re maestri, but no one has ever been a good painter at twelve years old. Painting, in addition to taste and feeling, requires a level of thoughtfulness that musicians can do without. Any day, you can hear people who are nearly lacking in intellect and emotion produce the most beautiful sounds from a violin or harp.
The human ANIMAL may be taught to play the harpsichord, and when it has{74} learned of a good master, the soul can travel at her ease while sounds with which she does not concern herself are mechanically produced by the fingers. But the simplest thing in the world cannot be painted without the aid of all the faculties of the soul.
The human ANIMAL can be taught to play the harpsichord, and once it learns from a good teacher, the soul can wander freely while sounds that don't require her attention are produced mechanically by the fingers. However, even the simplest thing can't be painted without engaging all the faculties of the soul.
If, however, any one should take it into his head to ply me with a distinction between the composition and the performance of music, I confess that he would give me some little difficulty. Ah, well! were all writers of essays quite candid they would all conclude as I am doing. When one enters upon the examination of a question, a dogmatic tone is generally assumed, because there has been a secret decision beforehand, just as I, notwithstanding my hypocritical impartiality, had decided in favor of painting. But discussion awakens objections, and everything ends with doubt.{75}
If anyone tries to convince me that there's a difference between composing and performing music, I admit it would be a bit challenging for me. Well, if all essay writers were completely honest, they would come to the same conclusion I am reaching. When you start examining a question, people usually take a dogmatic stance because they've already made up their minds, just like I, despite pretending to be neutral, have chosen to favor painting. But once you start discussing, it brings up objections, and in the end, everything leads to doubt.{75}
XXVI.
Raphael.
NOW that I am more tranquil, I will endeavor to speak calmly of the two portraits that follow the picture of the shepherdess of the Alps.
NOW that I am feeling more at peace, I will try to discuss calmly the two portraits that come after the image of the shepherdess of the Alps.
Raphael! Who but thyself could paint thy portrait; who but thyself would have dared attempt it? Thy open countenance, beaming with feeling and intellect, proclaims thy character and thy genius.
Raphael! Who other than you could paint your own portrait; who else would have dared to try? Your open face, shining with emotion and intelligence, reveals your character and your talent.
To gratify thy shade, I have placed beside thee the portrait of thy mistress, whom the men of all generations will hold answerable for the loss of the sublime works of which art has been deprived by thy premature death.
To honor your memory, I have set next to you the portrait of your beloved, who will be blamed by people throughout the ages for the loss of the amazing works that art has missed out on because of your untimely death.
When I examine the portrait of Raphael,{76} I feel myself penetrated by an almost religious respect for that great man, who, in the flower of his age, excelled the ancients, and whose pictures are at once the admiration and the despair of modern artists. My soul, in admiring it, is moved with indignation against that Italian who preferred her love to her lover, and who extinguished at her bosom that heavenly flame, that divine genius.
When I look at Raphael's portrait,{76} I feel an almost religious awe for that amazing man who, at the peak of his life, surpassed the ancients, and whose artworks are both admired and envied by modern artists. My soul, while admiring it, is stirred with anger towards that Italian woman who chose her love over her lover and snuffed out that heavenly spark, that divine genius, in her embrace.
Unhappy one! Knewest thou not that Raphael had announced a picture superior even to that of the Transfiguration? Didst thou not know that thine arms encircled the favorite of nature, the father of enthusiasm, a sublime genius ... a divinity?
Unhappy one! Didn’t you know that Raphael had announced a picture even better than the Transfiguration? Didn’t you realize that your arms wrapped around the favorite of nature, the father of enthusiasm, a sublime genius ... a divinity?
While my soul makes these observations, her companion, whose eyes are attentively fixed upon the lovely face of that fatal beauty, feels quite ready to forgive her the death of Raphael.{77}
While my soul makes these observations, her companion, whose eyes are focused intently on the beautiful face of that dangerous beauty, is completely willing to forgive her for Raphael's death.{77}
In vain my soul upbraids this extravagant weakness; she is not listened to at all. On such occasions a strange dialogue arises between the two, which terminates too often in favor of the bad principles, and of which I reserve a sample for another chapter.
In vain, my soul criticizes this foolish weakness; no one listens to her. During these moments, a strange conversation happens between the two, often ending in favor of the bad choices, and I’ll save an example of that for another chapter.
And if, by the way, my soul had not at that moment abruptly closed the inspection of the gallery, if she had given the OTHER time to contemplate the rounded and graceful features of the beautiful Roman lady, my intellect would have miserably lost its supremacy.
And if, by the way, my soul hadn’t suddenly shut down the viewing of the gallery at that moment, if it had allowed the OTHER time to admire the soft and elegant features of the beautiful Roman lady, my mind would have unfortunately lost its control.
And if, at that critical moment I had suddenly obtained the favor bestowed upon the fortunate Pygmalion, without having the least spark of the genius which makes me pardon Raphael his errors, it is just possible that I should have succumbed as he did.{78}
And if, at that crucial moment, I had suddenly received the blessing given to the lucky Pygmalion, without having even a hint of the talent that allows me to forgive Raphael his mistakes, it’s quite possible that I would have fallen just like he did.{78}
XXVII.
A Perfect Picture.
MY engravings, and the paintings of which I have spoken, fade away into nothing at the first glance bestowed upon the next picture. The immortal works of Raphael and Correggio, and of the whole Italian school, are not to be compared to it. Hence it is that when I accord to an amateur the pleasure of travelling with me, I always keep this until the last as a special luxury, and ever since I first exhibited this sublime picture to connoisseurs and to ignorant, to men of the world, to artists, to women, to children, to animals even, I have always found the spectators, whoever they might be, show, each in his own way, signs of pleasure and surprise, so admirably is nature rendered therein.{79}
My engravings and the paintings I’ve mentioned disappear completely at the first glance of the next picture. The timeless works of Raphael and Correggio, as well as the entire Italian school, can't compare to it. That's why, when I give an art lover the experience of traveling with me, I always save this as a special treat for the end. Ever since I first showcased this masterpiece to admirers and novices alike—people from all walks of life, artists, women, children, and even animals—I’ve always noticed that viewers, no matter who they are, show signs of joy and surprise, so beautifully does it capture nature.{79}
And what picture could be presented to you, gentlemen; what spectacle, ladies, could be placed before your eyes more certain of gaining your approval than the faithful portraiture of yourselves? The picture of which I speak is a mirror, and no one has as yet ventured to criticise it. It is to all who look on it a perfect picture, in depreciation of which not a word can be said.
And what image could we show you, gentlemen; what scene, ladies, could we present that would be more likely to win your approval than an accurate reflection of yourselves? The image I’m talking about is a mirror, and no one has dared to criticize it yet. For everyone who looks at it, it is a flawless depiction, and not a single word can be said against it.
You will at once admit that it should be regarded as one of the wonders of the world.
You have to admit that it should be considered one of the wonders of the world.
I will pass over in silence the pleasure felt by the natural philosopher in meditating upon the strange phenomena presented by light as it reproduces upon that polished surface all the objects of nature. A mirror offers to the sedentary traveller a thousand interesting reflections, a thousand observations which render it at once a useful and precious article.{80}
I won't dwell on the joy that a natural philosopher feels when contemplating the fascinating phenomena of light as it reflects all of nature's objects on a smooth surface. A mirror provides the stationary traveler with countless intriguing reflections and observations, making it both a useful and valuable item.{80}
Ye whom Love has held or still holds under his sway, learn that it is before a mirror that he sharpens his darts, and contemplates his cruelties. There it is that he plans his manœuvres, studies his tactics, and prepares himself for the war he wishes to declare. There he practices his killing glances and little affectations, and sly poutings, just as a player practices, with himself for spectator, before appearing in public.
You who have been captured by Love or are still under its influence, know that it’s in front of a mirror where he sharpens his arrows and thinks about his cruelties. It’s where he strategizes, studies his tactics, and gets ready for the battle he wants to start. There he practices his seductive looks and subtle gestures, just like an actor rehearses, with himself as the audience, before going on stage.
A mirror, being always impartial and true, brings before the eyes of the beholder the roses of youth and the wrinkles of age, without calumny and without flattery. It alone among the councilors of the great, invariably tells them the truth.
A mirror, always unbiased and honest, shows the viewer both the beauty of youth and the signs of aging, without judgment or praise. It stands alone among the advisors of the powerful, consistently revealing the truth.
It was this recommendation that made me desire the invention of a moral mirror, in which all men might see themselves, with their virtues and their vices. I even thought of offering a prize to some academy for this discovery, when riper reflec{81}tion proved to me that such an invention would be useless.
It was this suggestion that made me wish for the creation of a moral mirror, where everyone could see themselves, including their strengths and weaknesses. I even considered offering a reward to an academy for this discovery, but after more thought, I realized that such an invention would be pointless.
Alas! how rare it is for ugliness to recognize itself and break the mirror! In vain are looking-glasses multiplied around us which reflect light and truth with geometrical exactness. As soon as the rays reach our vision and paint us as we are, self-love slips its deceitful prism between us and our image, and presents a divinity to us.
Sadly, it’s so uncommon for someone to see their own ugliness and break the mirror! It doesn’t matter how many mirrors surround us that reflect light and truth perfectly. As soon as the light hits our eyes and shows us how we truly are, self-love puts its misleading lens between us and our reflection, making us see a goddess instead.
And of all the prisms that have existed since the first that came from the hands of the immortal Newton, none has possessed so powerful a refractive force, or produced such pleasing and lively colors, as the prism of self-love.
And of all the prisms that have existed since the first one crafted by the immortal Newton, none has had such a strong refractive power or created such attractive and vibrant colors as the prism of self-love.
Now, seeing that ordinary looking-glasses record the truth in vain, and that they cannot make men see their own imperfections, every one being satisfied with his face, what would a moral mirror avail?{82} Few people would look at it, and no one would recognize himself. None save philosophers would spend their time in examining themselves,—I even have my doubts about the philosophers.
Now, since ordinary mirrors reflect the truth for nothing, and they can't help people see their own flaws, since everyone is pleased with their appearance, what good would a moral mirror do?{82} Few would bother to look into it, and no one would see themselves. Only philosophers would take the time to introspect—I even have doubts about the philosophers.
Taking the mirror as we find it, I hope no one will blame me for ranking it above all the pictures of the Italian school.
Taking the mirror as we see it, I hope no one will judge me for ranking it above all the works of the Italian school.
Ladies, whose taste cannot be faulty, and whose opinion should decide the question, generally upon entering a room let their first glance fall upon this picture.
Ladies, whose taste is always spot-on and whose opinions should settle the matter, typically cast their first glance at this picture when they enter a room.
A thousand times have I seen ladies, aye, and gallants, too, forget at a ball their lovers and their mistresses, the dancing, and all the pleasures of the fête, to contemplate with evident complaisance this enchanting picture, and honoring it even, from time to time, in the midst of the liveliest quadrille, with a look.
A thousand times I’ve seen ladies, and guys too, forget about their partners at a dance, the music, and all the fun of the party, to admire this enchanting scene, even pausing during the liveliest quadrille to give it a look.
Who then can dispute the rank that I accord to it among the masterpieces of the art of Apelles?{83}
Who can argue against the place I give it among the masterpieces of Apelles? {83}
XXVIII.
The Upset Carriage.
I HAD at last nearly reached my bureau. So close was I, that had I stretched out my arm I could have touched the corner nearest to me. But at this very moment I was on the verge of seeing the fruit of all my labors destroyed, and of losing my life. I should pass over in silence the accident that happened to me, for fear of discouraging other travellers, were it not that it is so difficult to upset such a post-chaise as I employ, that it must be allowed that one must be uncommonly unlucky—as unlucky, indeed, as it is my lot to be—to be exposed to a like danger.
I HAD finally gotten almost to my desk. I was so close that if I had reached out my arm, I could have touched the nearest corner. But at that moment, I was about to see all my hard work go to waste and risk losing my life. I would usually skip over the accident that happened to me to avoid discouraging other travelers, but it’s important to note just how hard it is to tip over the kind of carriage I was using. One must truly be incredibly unlucky—as unlucky as I tend to be—to face a similar danger.
There I was, stretched at full length upon the ground, completely upset, and it{84} was done so quickly, so unexpectedly, that I should have been almost tempted to question the cause of my abject position, had not a singing in my ears and a sharp pain in my left shoulder too plainly demonstrated it.
There I was, lying flat on the ground, completely shaken, and it{84} happened so fast, so unexpectedly, that I might have been tempted to wonder how I ended up in such a miserable state, if not for the ringing in my ears and the sharp pain in my left shoulder that clearly showed me the reason.
This was again the OTHER, who had played a trick upon me.
This was once again the OTHER, who had pulled a fast one on me.
Startled by the voice of a poor man who suddenly asked alms at my door, and by the voice of Rose, my other half suddenly turned the arm-chair sharply round, before my soul had time to warn it that a piece of brick, which served as a drag, was gone. The jerk was so violent that my post-chaise was quite thrown from its centre of gravity, and turned over upon me.
Startled by the voice of a poor man suddenly asking for alms at my door, and by the voice of Rose, my other half quickly spun the armchair around before I had a chance to warn myself that a brick, which was holding it steady, was gone. The sudden movement was so forceful that my post-chaise completely lost its balance and tipped over onto me.
This was, I must own, one of the occasions upon which I had most to complain of my soul. For instead of being vexed at herself for having been absent, and scolding her companion for its hurry, she{85} so far forgot herself as to give way to the most animal resentment, and to insult the poor fellow cruelly.
This was, I have to admit, one of the times I had the most to complain about my spirit. Instead of being upset with herself for being absent and scolding her friend for being in a rush, she{85} completely lost herself and let her basest anger take over, cruelly insulting the poor guy.
“Idle rascal,” she said, “go and work.” (An execrable apostrophe this, the invention of miserly, heartless Mammon.)
“Lazy good-for-nothing,” she said, “go get a job.” (What a terrible remark this is, the creation of stingy, heartless wealth.)
“Sir,” replied the man, hoping to soften my heart, “I come from Chambéry.”
“Sir,” replied the man, trying to appeal to my sympathies, “I’m from Chambéry.”
“So much the worse for you.”
“So much the worse for you.”
“I am James. You saw me when you were in the country. I used to drive the sheep into the fields.”
“I’m James. You saw me when you were in the countryside. I used to take the sheep out into the fields.”
“And what do you do here?” My soul began to regret the harshness of my first words; I almost think she regretted them a moment before they were uttered. In like manner, when one meets in the road a rut or puddle, one sees it, but has not time to avoid it.
“And what do you do here?” My heart started to feel bad about how harsh my first words were; I almost sensed that she felt the same way just before they slipped out. Similarly, when you encounter a pothole or puddle on the road, you see it but don’t have time to steer clear.
Rose finished the work of bringing me to good sense and repentance. She had recognized Jem, who had often shared his{86} crust with her, and she testified by her caresses, her remembrance and gratitude.
Rose completed the task of bringing me to my senses and making me feel remorse. She had recognized Jem, who had frequently shared his{86} crust with her, and she showed her affection, remembrance, and gratitude through her gestures.
Meanwhile, Joannetti, who had gathered together what was left of my dinner, his own share, gave it at once to Jem.
Meanwhile, Joannetti, who had collected what remained of my dinner along with his portion, immediately gave it to Jem.
Poor Joannetti!
Poor Joannetti!
Thus it is that in my journey I get lessons of philosophy and humanity from my servant and my dog.{87}
So it is that in my journey I learn lessons about philosophy and humanity from my servant and my dog.{87}
XXIX.
Misfortune.
BEFORE proceeding farther, I wish to remove a suspicion which may have crossed the minds of my readers.
BEFORE going any further, I want to clear up a doubt that might have come to my readers' minds.
I would not for all the world be suspected of having undertaken this journey just because I did not know how to spend my time, and was in a manner compelled thereto by circumstances. I here affirm, and swear by all that is dear to me, that I projected it long before the event took place which deprived me of my liberty for forty-two days. This forced retirement only served as an opportunity for setting out sooner than I had intended.
I would never want anyone to think I took this journey just because I didn't know how to fill my time, or that I was somehow pressured into it by circumstances. I want to make it clear, and swear by everything I hold dear, that I planned this trip long before the event that took away my freedom for forty-two days. This unexpected break only allowed me to set out sooner than I had originally planned.
This gratuitous protestation will, I know, appear suspicious in the eyes of some.{88} But those who are so ready to suspect are just the persons who will not read this book. They have enough to do at home and at their friends’, plenty of other business to attend to. And good, honest folk will believe me.
This unnecessary statement will likely seem dubious to some.{88} But those quick to judge are exactly the people who won't read this book. They have enough going on at home and at their friends’ places, with plenty of other things to keep them busy. And good, honest people will trust me.
Still, I freely admit that I should have preferred another season for my journey, and that I should have chosen for its execution Lent rather than the Carnival. The philosophical reflections, however, that have come to me from above have greatly aided me in supporting the loss of those pleasures which Turin offers at this noisy and exciting time.
Still, I’ll admit that I would have preferred a different time for my journey, and that I should have picked Lent instead of Carnival for it. However, the deep thoughts I’ve received have really helped me cope with missing out on the pleasures that Turin offers during this loud and lively period.
It is certain, I have thought to myself, that the walls of my chamber are not so magnificently decorated as those of a ballroom. The silence of my cottage is far less agreeable than the pleasing sounds of music and dancing. But among the brilliant personages one meets in those fes{89}tive scenes, there are certainly some who are more sick at heart than I am.
It’s clear, I’ve told myself, that the walls of my room aren’t as beautifully decorated as those in a ballroom. The quiet of my cottage is nowhere near as enjoyable as the joyful sounds of music and dancing. But among the amazing people you meet at those festive gatherings, there are definitely some who feel more miserable than I do.
And why should I picture to myself those who are more happily circumstanced than it is my lot to be, while the world swarms with those who are worse off? Instead of transporting myself in fancy to that sumptuous dancing-hall, where so many beauties are eclipsed by the young Eugénie, I need only pause a moment in one of the streets, that lead thither, if I would learn how happy is my fate.
And why should I imagine those who are better off than I am when the world is full of people who have it worse? Instead of daydreaming about that luxurious ballroom where so many beauties fade in comparison to the young Eugénie, I just have to take a moment in one of the streets leading there to realize how fortunate I really am.
For, under the porticos of those magnificent apartments, lie a crowd of wretched people, half-naked, and ready to die from cold and misery. What a spectacle is here! Would that this page of my book were known throughout the universe! Would that every one knew that in this opulent city a host of wretched beings sleep, without covering, in the coldest winter nights, and with no pillow but the{90} corner-stone of a street, or the steps of a palace.
For, under the columns of those beautiful buildings, a crowd of miserable people lies, half-naked and on the brink of dying from the cold and suffering. What a sight this is! I wish this page of my book were known all over the world! I wish everyone knew that in this wealthy city, a multitude of unfortunate souls sleeps, without a blanket, on the coldest winter nights, using only the{90} corner-stone of a street or the steps of a palace as their pillow.
Here, again, is a group of children, crouching together for protection from the deadly cold; and here a trembling woman, who has no voice left to complain with. The passers-by come and go without being touched by a spectacle with which they are so familiar. The noise of carriages, the shouts of intemperance, the ravishing sounds of music, mingle not unfrequently with the wails of those unhappy creatures, and fill the ear with doleful discord.{91}
Here, once again, is a group of kids huddled together to stay warm from the freezing cold; and here is a trembling woman who has lost her voice to complain. People walk by without being affected by a sight they know all too well. The noise of carriages, the shouts of excess, and the enchanting sounds of music often blend with the cries of those unfortunate souls, creating a jarring contrast. {91}
XXX.
Charity.
WERE any one to pass a hasty judgment upon a city, taking my last chapter as a criterion, he would err greatly. I have spoken of the poor we meet with, of their pitiful lamentations, and of the indifference with which many regard them. But I have said nothing of the multitude of charitable persons who sleep while others seek amusement, and who rise at dawn, unobserved and unostentatiously, to succor the unfortunate.
WHOever quickly judges a city based on my last chapter would be making a big mistake. I talked about the poor we encounter, their sad cries, and the way many people ignore them. However, I didn’t mention the many kind-hearted individuals who rest while others are out having fun and who get up at dawn, quietly and without fanfare, to help those in need.
This aspect of city life must not be passed by in silence. I will write it on the reverse of the page I was anxious everybody should read.
This part of city life shouldn't be overlooked. I'll write it on the back of the page that I really want everyone to read.
After having divided their good things{92} with their brethren, after having poured balm into hearts chafed by sorrow, you may see them enter the churches, while wearied vice sleeps upon eider-down, to offer up their prayers to God, and to thank Him for his mercies. The light of a solitary lamp still struggles in the sanctuary with the daylight; but they are already prostrate before the altar. And the Almighty, angered by the hard-hearted selfishness of men, witholds his threatening hand.{93}
After sharing their blessings{92} with their fellow beings and bringing comfort to those troubled by pain, you can see them enter the churches, while tired sin rests on soft pillows, to offer their prayers to God and thank Him for His kindness. The light from a solitary lamp still battles with the daylight in the sanctuary; but they are already kneeling before the altar. And the Almighty, angered by the selfishness of people, holds back His threatening hand.{93}
XXXI.
Inventory.
I COULD not help saying a word in my journey about those poor creatures, for the thought of them has often come across me on my way, and turned the current of my reflections. Sometimes, struck with the difference between their case and my own, I have suddenly stopped my travelling-carriage, and thought my chamber extravagantly embellished! What superfluous luxury! Six chairs, two tables, a bureau, and a looking-glass! What vain display! My bed above all things, my rose and white bed, with its two mattresses, seemed to rival the magnificence and effeminacy of Asiatic monarchs.
I couldn't help but mention those poor souls during my travels, as the thought of them often crossed my mind and changed the direction of my reflections. Sometimes, overwhelmed by the contrast between their situation and my own, I would suddenly stop my carriage and think how extravagantly decorated my room was! What excess! Six chairs, two tables, a bureau, and a mirror! What pointless show! My bed, above all, my pink and white bed with its two mattresses, seemed to compete with the grandeur and extravagance of Asian kings.
These meditations made me indifferent{94} to the pleasures that had been forbidden me. And, as I went on from one reflection to another, my fit of philosophy became so serious that I could have seen a ball going on in the next room, and heard the sound of violins and flutes without stirring. I could have heard Marchesini’s melodious voice, that voice which has so often transported me, yes, I could have listened to it without being moved. Nay, more, I could have gazed upon the most beauteous woman in Turin, upon Eugénie herself, adorned from head to foot by the hands of Mademoiselle Rapoux,[4] without emotion. But, of this last, I must confess myself not quite sure.{95}
These reflections made me indifferent{94} to the pleasures that had been off-limits to me. And as I moved from one thought to another, my philosophical mood became so intense that I could have watched a party happening in the next room and heard the sound of violins and flutes without reacting. I could have listened to Marchesini’s lovely voice, a voice that has often moved me, yes, I could have paid attention to it without feeling anything. What's more, I could have looked at the most beautiful woman in Turin, Eugénie herself, adorned from head to toe by Mademoiselle Rapoux,[4] and remained unaffected. But for the last part, I must admit I'm not entirely sure.{95}
XXXII.
Misanthropy.
BUT, gentlemen, allow me to ask a question. Do you enjoy balls and plays as much as you used to do? As for me, I avow that for some time past crowded assemblies have inspired me with a kind of terror. When in their midst, I am assailed by an ominous dream. In vain I try to shake it off; like the dream of Athalie, it constantly returns. Perhaps this is because the soul, overwhelmed at the present moment by dark fancies and painful pictures, sees nothing but sadness around it, just as a disordered stomach turns the most wholesome food into poison. However this may be, my dream is as follows. When I am at one of these fêtes,{96} among a crowd of kind, good-natured men, who dance and sing, who weep at tragedies, and are full of frankness and cordiality, I say to myself:—
BUT, gentlemen, can I ask you something? Do you enjoy parties and plays as much as you used to? For me, I have to admit that for a while now, being in crowded gatherings fills me with a kind of dread. When I find myself in the middle of one, I feel like I’m caught in a bad dream. No matter how hard I try to shake it off, it keeps coming back, like the dream in Athalie. Maybe it's because my mind is currently overwhelmed by dark thoughts and painful images, seeing nothing but sadness around me, just like how an upset stomach turns the healthiest food into poison. Whatever the reason, my dream goes like this: when I'm at one of these events,{96} surrounded by a crowd of kind, good-hearted people who are dancing and singing, who cry during tragedies and are full of warmth and friendliness, I think to myself:—
“If suddenly a white bear, a philosopher, a tiger, or some other animal of this kind were to enter, and ascending to the orchestra, were to shout out furiously: ‘Wretched beings! Listen to the truth that comes from my lips! You are oppressed! You are the slaves of tyrants! You are wretched and heart-sick! Awake from your lethargy!
“If a white bear, a philosopher, a tiger, or some other animal like that were to burst in, climb up to the stage, and shout angrily: ‘Miserable creatures! Pay attention to the truth I’m speaking! You are being oppressed! You are the slaves of tyrants! You are miserable and heartbroken! Wake up from your apathy!
“‘Musicians, break your instruments about your heads, and let each one of you arm himself with a poniard. Think no more about holidays and rejoicings. Climb into the boxes, and stab their occupants, one and all. And let the women steep their timid hands in blood.
“‘Musicians, smash your instruments over your heads, and let each of you grab a dagger. Stop thinking about holidays and celebrations. Climb into the boxes and stab everyone inside. And let the women dip their scared hands in blood.
“‘Quit this room, for you are free! Tear your king from his throne, and your God from his sanctuary.{97}’
‘Leave this room, because you’re free! Take your king down from his throne, and your God from his sanctuary.{97}
“Well, and how many of these charming men will obey this tiger’s voice. How many of them thought, perhaps, of such deeds before they entered? Who can tell? Was there no dancing in Paris five years ago?”
“Well, how many of these charming men will listen to this tiger’s voice? How many of them considered such actions before they came in? Who knows? Wasn’t there dancing in Paris five years ago?”
Joannetti! shut the door and windows! I do not wish to see the light! Let no one enter my room. Put my sword within reach. Go out yourself, and keep away from me.{98}
Joannetti! Close the door and windows! I don’t want to see the light! Let no one come into my room. Keep my sword within reach. You go out and stay away from me.{98}
XXXIII.
Consolation.
NO, no! Stay, Joannetti, my good fellow! And you too, Rose, you who guess what are my sorrows, and soften them by your caresses, come!
NO, no! Stay, Joannetti, my good friend! And you too, Rose, who understand my troubles and ease them with your affection, come!
XXXIV.
Correspondence.
THE upset of my post-chaise has rendered the reader the service of shortening my journey by a good dozen chapters, for, upon getting up, I found myself close to my bureau, and saw that I had no time left for any observations upon a number of engravings and pictures which had yet to be surveyed, and which might have lengthened my excursions into the realm of painting.
THE upset of my carriage has actually helped the reader by cutting my journey short by a good twelve chapters, because when I got up, I found myself right next to my desk and realized I had no time left to look at several engravings and paintings I hadn’t examined yet, which could have extended my exploration into the world of art.
Leaving to the right the portraits of Raphael and his mistress, the Chevalier d’Assas and the Shepherdess of the Alps, and taking the left, the side on which the window is situated, my bureau comes into view. It is the first and the most promi{100}nent object the traveller’s eyes light upon, taking the route I have indicated.
Leaving the portraits of Raphael and his mistress, the Chevalier d’Assas, and the Shepherdess of the Alps to the right, and taking the left side where the window is located, my desk comes into view. It is the first and most prominent object that catches the traveler's eye while following the route I’ve described.
It is surmounted by a few shelves that serve as a book-case, and the whole is terminated by a bust which completes the pyramid, and contributes more than any other object to the adornment of this region.
It is topped with a few shelves that act as a bookcase, and the whole thing is finished off with a bust that completes the pyramid and adds more to the decoration of this area than any other item.
Upon opening the first drawer to the left, we find an inkstand, paper of all kinds, pens ready mended, and sealing-wax; all which set the most indolent person longing to write.
Upon opening the first drawer on the left, we find an inkstand, various types of paper, pens that are all ready to go, and sealing wax; all of which make even the laziest person eager to write.
I am sure, dear Jenny, that if you chanced to open this drawer, you would reply to the letter I wrote you a year ago.
I’m sure, dear Jenny, that if you happened to open this drawer, you would respond to the letter I sent you a year ago.
In the opposite drawer lies a confused heap of materials for a touching history of the prisoner of Pignerol,[5] which, my dear friends, you will ere long read.
In the opposite drawer is a jumbled collection of materials for a touching story about the prisoner of Pignerol,[5] which, my dear friends, you will read soon.
Between these two drawers is a recess{101} into which I throw whatever letters I receive. All that have reached me during the last ten years are there. The oldest of them are arranged according to date in several packets; the new ones lie pell-mell. Besides these, I have several dating from my early boyhood.
Between these two drawers is a space{101} where I toss any letters I get. All the letters I've received in the last ten years are there. The oldest ones are sorted by date in a few packets; the newer ones are just mixed together. I also have several from my early childhood.
How great a pleasure it is to behold again through the medium of these letters the interesting scenes of our early years, to be once again transported into those happy days that we shall see no more!
How wonderful it is to see again through these letters the fascinating moments of our early years, to be transported back to those joyful days that we will never experience again!
How full is my heart, and how deeply tinged with sadness is its joy, as my eyes wander over those words traced by one who is gone forever! That handwriting is his, and it was his heart that guided his hand. It was to me that he addressed this letter, and this letter is all that is left of him!
How full is my heart, and how deeply mixed with sadness is its joy, as my eyes drift over those words written by someone who is gone forever! That handwriting is his, and it was his heart that guided his hand. He wrote this letter to me, and this letter is all that remains of him!
When I put my hand into this recess, I seldom leave the spot for the whole day.{102} In like manner, a traveller will pass rapidly through whole provinces of Italy, making a few hurried and trivial observations on the way, and upon reaching Rome will take up his abode there for months.
When I put my hand into this space, I hardly move from the spot for the entire day.{102} In the same way, a traveler will quickly go through entire regions of Italy, making just a few quick and superficial observations along the way, and once they reach Rome, they'll settle there for months.
This is the richest vein in the mine I am exploring. How changed I find my ideas and sentiments, and how altered do my friends appear when I examine them as they were in days gone by, and as they are now! In these mirrors of the past I see them in mortal agitation about plans which no longer disturb them.
This is the most valuable section in the mine I’m exploring. I notice how much my thoughts and feelings have changed, and how different my friends seem when I look back at how they were before compared to how they are now! In these reflections of the past, I see them in a state of turmoil over plans that no longer bother them.
Here I find an event announced which we evidently looked upon as a great misfortune; but the end of the letter is wanting, and the circumstance is so entirely forgotten that I cannot now make out what the matter was which so concerned us. We were possessed by a thousand prejudices. We knew nothing of the world, and of men. But then, how warm was our intercourse!{103} How intimate our friendship! How unbounded our confidence!
Here, I see a situation that we clearly considered a major disaster; however, the end of the letter is missing, and the whole thing is so completely forgotten that I can’t figure out what it was that worried us so much. We were filled with countless biases. We didn't know anything about the world or people. But still, how passionate was our interaction! How close was our friendship! How limitless was our trust!{103}
In our ignorance there was bliss. But now,—ah! all is now changed. We have been compelled, as others, to read the human heart; and truth, falling like a bomb into the midst of us, has forever destroyed the enchanted palace of illusion.{104}
In our ignorance, there was happiness. But now—ah! everything has changed. We have been forced, like others, to understand the human heart; and the truth, hitting us like a bomb, has completely shattered the enchanted palace of illusion.{104}

XXXV.
The Withered Rose.
IF the subject were worth the trouble, I could readily write a chapter upon that dry rose. It is a flower of last year’s carnival. I gathered it myself in the Valentino.[6] And in the evening, an hour before the ball was to begin, I bore it, full of hope, and agreeably excited, to Madame Hautcastel, for her acceptance. She took it, and without looking at it or me, placed it upon her toilette-table. And how could she have given me any of her attention? She was engaged in looking at herself.{105} There she stood before a large mirror; her hair was ornamented for a fête, and the decorations of her dress were undergoing their final arrangement. She was so fully occupied, her attention was so totally absorbed by the ribbons, gauzes, and all sorts of finery that lay in heaps before her, that I did not get a look or any sign of recognition. There was nothing for me but resignation. I held out humbly in my hand a number of pins arranged in order. But her pincushion being more within reach, she took them from her pincushion, and when I brought my hand nearer, she took them from my hand, quite indifferently, and in taking them up she would feel about for them with the tips of her fingers, without taking her eyes from the glass, lest she should lose sight of herself.
IF the topic were worth the effort, I could easily write a chapter about that dried rose. It’s a flower from last year's carnival. I picked it myself at the Valentino.[6] And in the evening, an hour before the ball was set to start, I brought it, full of hope and excitement, to Madame Hautcastel for her approval. She took it without looking at it or me and placed it on her dressing table. And how could she give me any of her attention? She was too busy admiring herself.{105} She stood there in front of a large mirror; her hair was styled for a party, and the embellishments on her dress were being finalized. She was so absorbed in the ribbons, gauzes, and various decorations piled around her that I didn't receive a glance or any sign of acknowledgment. All I could do was resign myself to the situation. I held out a set of pins neatly arranged in my hand. However, since her pincushion was closer, she grabbed the pins from it. When I moved my hand closer, she took them from me indifferently, feeling around for them with her fingertips without ever taking her eyes off the mirror, as if she couldn’t afford to lose sight of herself.
For some time I held behind her a second mirror that she might judge the better how her dress became her, and as{106} her face reflected itself from one glass to another, I saw a prospective of coquettes, no one of whom paid me the least attention. In a word, I must confess that my rose and I cut a very poor figure.
For a while, I stood behind her with a second mirror so she could better see how her dress suited her, and as{106} her face bounced back and forth between the two mirrors, I saw a lineup of flirts, none of whom paid me any attention. In short, I have to admit that my rose and I looked pretty ridiculous.
At last I lost all patience, and unable longer to control the vexation that preyed upon me, I put down the looking-glass I had been holding, and went out angrily without taking leave.
At last, I lost all patience, and unable to control the frustration that was bothering me, I put down the mirror I had been holding and walked out angrily without saying goodbye.
“O! you are going?” she said, turning so as to see her figure in profile. I made no answer, but I listened some time at the door to see what effect my abrupt departure would have.
“O! You’re leaving?” she said, turning to catch her reflection in profile. I didn’t respond, but I stood quietly by the door for a while to see how my sudden exit would affect her.
“Do you not see,” she said to her maid, after a moment’s silence, “that this caraco, particularly the lower part, is much too large at the waist, and will want pinning?”
“Don’t you see,” she said to her maid after a moment of silence, “that this dress, especially the lower part, is way too big at the waist and will need pinning?”
Why and wherefore that rose is upon my shelf, I shall certainly not explain, for, as I said before, a withered rose does not deserve a chapter.{107}
Why that rose is on my shelf, I'm not going to explain, because, as I said before, a wilted rose doesn't deserve a chapter.{107}
And pray observe, ladies, that I make no reflection upon the adventure with the rose. I do not say whether Madame de Hautcastel did well or otherwise in preferring her dress to me, or whether I had any right to a better reception.
And please note, ladies, that I’m not commenting on the situation with the rose. I'm not saying whether Madame de Hautcastel was right or wrong for choosing her dress over me, or if I was entitled to a better reception.
I take special care to deduce therefrom no general conclusions about the reality, the strength, and the duration of the affection of ladies for their friends. I am content to cast this chapter (since it is one) into the world with the rest of my journey, without addressing it to any one, and without recommending it to any one.
I make sure not to draw any broad conclusions about the reality, depth, and lasting nature of women's affection for their friends. I'm fine with sharing this chapter (since it is one) with the world alongside the rest of my journey, without directing it to anyone in particular or recommending it to anyone.
I will only add, gentlemen, a word of counsel. Impress well upon your minds this fact, that your mistress is no longer yours on the day of a ball.
I just want to give you guys a little advice. Keep in mind that your partner is no longer really yours on the day of a ball.
As soon as dressing begins, a lover is no more thought of than a husband would be; and the ball takes the place of a lover.
As soon as dressing starts, no one thinks about a lover any more than they would think about a husband; instead, the party takes the place of a lover.
Every one knows how little a husband{108} gains by enforcing his love. Take your trouble, then, patiently, cheerfully.
Everyone knows how little a husband{108} gains by forcing his love. So, take your troubles patiently and cheerfully.
And, my dear sir, do not deceive yourself; if a lady welcome you at a ball, it is not as a lover that you are received, for you are a husband—but as a part of the ball; and you are therefore but a fraction of her new conquest. You are the decimal of a lover. Or, it may be, you dance well, and so give éclat to her graces. After all, perhaps, the most flattering way in which you can regard her kind welcome is to consider that she hopes by treating as her cavalier a man of parts like yourself, to excite the jealousy of her companions. Were it not for that she would not notice you at all.
And, my dear sir, don’t fool yourself; if a lady greets you at a ball, it’s not as a romantic interest because you’re a husband—but as part of the event; so you’re just a piece of her new victory. You’re just a part of her romance. Or maybe you dance well, which adds to her appeal. Ultimately, the most flattering way to see her warm welcome is to think that she hopes to stir jealousy among her friends by treating a man of your caliber as her dance partner. If it weren’t for that, she probably wouldn’t pay you any attention at all.
It amounts then to this. You must resign yourself to your fate, and wait until the husband’s rôle is played. I know those who would be glad to get off at so cheap a rate.{109}
It comes down to this: You have to accept your fate and wait for the husband’s role to be fulfilled. I know people who would be happy to get out of it for so little. {109}
XXXVI.
The Library.
I PROMISED to give a dialogue between my soul and the OTHER. But there are some chapters which elude me, as it were, or rather, there are others which flow from my pen nolens volens, and derange my plans. Among these is one about my library; and I will make it as short as I can. Our forty-two days will soon be ended; and even were it not so, a similar period would not suffice to complete the description of the rich country in which I travel so pleasantly.
I PROMISED to share a conversation between my soul and the OTHER. But there are some chapters that escape me, so to speak, or rather, there are others that come out of my pen nolens volens, disrupting my plans. One of these is about my library, and I’ll keep it as brief as I can. Our forty-two days will soon be over; and even if that weren't the case, a similar amount of time wouldn't be enough to fully describe the beautiful country where I'm traveling so enjoyably.
My library, then, is composed of novels, if I must make the confession; of novels and a few choice poets.
My library, then, consists of novels, if I have to admit it; of novels and a few select poets.
But if I go out of my way in search of unreal afflictions, I find in return, such virtue, kindness, and disinterestedness in this imaginary world as I have never yet found united in the real world around me. I meet with a woman after my heart’s desire, free from whim, lightness, and affectation. I say nothing about beauty; this I can leave to my imagination, and picture her faultlessly beautiful. And then, closing the book, which no longer keeps pace with my ideas, I take the fair one by the hand, and we travel together over a country a thousand times more delightful than Eden itself. What painter could represent the{111} fairy land in which I have placed the goddess of my heart? What poet could ever describe the lively and manifold sensations I experience in those enchanted regions?
But if I go out of my way searching for imaginary troubles, I find in return such virtue, kindness, and selflessness in this make-believe world that I've never encountered all together in the real world around me. I meet a woman who is everything I've ever wanted, free from whims, superficiality, and pretentiousness. I'm not even mentioning beauty; I can leave that to my imagination and envision her as perfectly beautiful. Then, closing the book, which no longer aligns with my thoughts, I take the lovely one by the hand, and we travel together through a land a thousand times more delightful than Eden itself. What artist could ever depict the{111} fairyland where I've placed the goddess of my heart? What poet could ever capture the vibrant and diverse feelings I experience in those enchanted lands?
How often have I cursed that Cleveland,[9] who is always embarking upon new troubles which he might very well avoid! I cannot endure that book with its long list of calamities. But if I open it by way of distraction, I cannot help devouring it to the end.
How many times have I cursed that Cleveland,[9] who keeps getting into new troubles that he could easily avoid! I can't stand that book with its endless list of disasters. But if I pick it up to distract myself, I can't help but read it all the way through.
For how could I leave that poor man among the Abaquis? What would become of him in the hands of those savages? Still less dare I leave him in his attempt to escape from captivity.
For how could I leave that poor man with the Abaquis? What would happen to him in the hands of those savages? Even less would I dare to leave him while he tries to escape from captivity.
Indeed, I so enter into his sorrows, I am so interested in him and in his unfortunate family, that the sudden appearance of the ferocious Ruintons makes my hair stand on end. When I read that passage a cold{112} perspiration covers me, and my fright is as lively and real as if I was going to be roasted and eaten by the monsters myself.
Indeed, I feel his pain so deeply, and I care so much about him and his unfortunate family, that the unexpected arrival of the fierce Ruintons sends chills down my spine. When I read that part, I break into a cold{112} sweat, and my fear feels as vivid and real as if I were about to be roasted and eaten by the monsters myself.
When I have had enough of tears and love, I turn to some poet, and set out again for a new world.{113}
When I’m done with tears and love, I turn to a poet and venture out into a new world.{113}
XXXVII.
Another World.
FROM the Argonautic expedition to the Assembly of Notables; from the bottom of the nethermost pit to the furthest fixed star beyond the Milky Way; to the confines of the Universe; to the gates of chaos; thus far extends the vast field over the length and breadth of which I leisurely roam. I lack nor time nor space. Thither, conducted by Homer, by Milton, by Virgil, by Ossian, I transport my existence.
FROM the Argonauts' journey to the Assembly of Notables; from the deepest pit to the farthest star beyond the Milky Way; to the edges of the Universe; to the gates of chaos; this is the enormous expanse where I wander at my own pace. I have no shortage of time or space. There, guided by Homer, Milton, Virgil, and Ossian, I immerse myself in existence.
All the events that have taken place between these two epochs; all the countries, all the worlds, all the beings that have existed between these two boundaries,—all are mine, all as lawfully belong to me as the{114} ships that entered the Piræus belonged to a certain Athenian.
All the events that have happened between these two times; all the countries, all the worlds, all the beings that have existed between these two limits—everything is mine, just as lawfully as the{114} ships that came into the Piræus belonged to a certain Athenian.
Above all the rest do I love the poets who carry me back to the remotest antiquity. The death of the ambitious Agamemnon, the madness of Orestes, and the tragical history of the heaven-persecuted family of the Atrides, inspire me with a terror that all the events of modern times could not excite in my breast.
Above everything else, I love the poets who take me back to the furthest past. The death of the ambitious Agamemnon, the madness of Orestes, and the tragic story of the family of the Atrides, which suffered under the heavens, fill me with a fear that nothing in modern times can evoke in me.
Behold the fatal urn which contains the ashes of Orestes! Who would not shudder at the sight? Electra, unhappy sister! be comforted, for it is Orestes himself who bears the urn, and the ashes are those of his enemies.
Behold the deadly urn that holds Orestes' ashes! Who wouldn't shudder at the sight? Electra, poor sister! take comfort, for it is Orestes himself who carries the urn, and the ashes are those of his enemies.
No longer are their banks like those of Xanthus or the Scamander. No longer do we visit plains such as those of Hesperia or Arcadia. Where are now the isles of Lemnos and Crete? Where the famous labyrinth? Where is the rock that forlorn{115} Ariadne washed with her tears? Theseus is seen no more; Hercules is gone forever. The men, aye, and the heroes of our day are but pigmies.
No longer are their rivers like those of Xanthus or the Scamander. No longer do we visit plains like those of Hesperia or Arcadia. Where are the islands of Lemnos and Crete now? Where is the famous labyrinth? Where is the rock that lonely{115} Ariadne soaked with her tears? Theseus is no longer seen; Hercules is gone forever. The men, and yes, the heroes of our time are just shadows of what they once were.
When I would visit a scene full of enthusiasm, and put forth all the strength of my imagination, I cling boldly to the flowing robe of the sublime blind poet of Albion at the moment when he soars heavenward, and dares approach the throne of the Eternal. What muse was able to sustain him in a flight so lofty that no man before him ever ventured to raise his eyes so high? From heaven’s dazzling pavement which avaricious Mammon looked down upon with envious eyes, I pass, horror-stricken, to the vast caverns of Satan’s sojourn. I take my place at the infernal council, mingle with the host of rebellious spirits, and listen to their discourse.
When I visit a scene filled with excitement and unleash the full power of my imagination, I boldly grasp the flowing robe of the sublime blind poet from Albion as he ascends to the heavens, daring to approach the throne of the Eternal. What muse could have supported him in such a high flight that no one before him ever dared to look so far up? From the dazzling pavement of heaven, which greedy Mammon gazes down upon with envy, I move, horrified, to the vast caverns where Satan resides. I take my place at the infernal council, mix with the rebellious spirits, and listen to their conversations.
But here I must confess a weakness for which I have often reproached myself.{116}
But here I have to admit a weakness that I've often criticized myself for.{116}
I cannot help taking a certain interest in Satan, thus hurled headlong from heaven. (I am speaking, of course, of Milton’s Satan.) While I blame the obstinacy of the rebel angel, the firmness he shows in the midst of his exceeding great misery, and the grandness of his courage, inspire me, against my will, with admiration. Although not ignorant of the woe resulting from the direful enterprise that led him to force the gate of hell and to trouble the home of our first parents, I cannot for a moment, do what I will, wish he may perish in the confusion of chaos on his way. I even think I could willingly help him, did not shame withhold me. I follow his every movement, and take as much pleasure in travelling with him as if I were in very good company. In vain I consider that after all he is a devil on his way to the ruin of the human race, that he is a thorough democrat not after the manner of those of{117} Athens, but of Paris. All this does not cure me of my prejudice in his favor.
I can’t help but take a certain interest in Satan, who was thrown out of heaven. (I’m talking about Milton’s Satan, of course.) While I criticize the stubbornness of the rebellious angel, the strength he shows in the midst of his immense suffering and the greatness of his courage inspire a reluctant admiration in me. Even though I know all too well the misery caused by the terrible actions that led him to break into hell and disrupt our first parents' lives, I can’t bring myself to wish he would perish in the chaos of his journey. In fact, I think I could gladly assist him, if only shame didn’t hold me back. I follow his every step and enjoy traveling alongside him as if I were in great company. I try to remind myself that, after all, he is a devil on a mission to ruin humankind, that he is a true democrat, not in the sense of those from {117} Athens, but like those from Paris. Still, none of this lessens my bias in his favor.
How vast was his project! How great the boldness displayed in its execution!
How huge was his project! How impressive the courage shown in making it happen!
When the thrice-threefold gates of hell fly open before him, and the dark, boundless ocean discloses itself in all its horror at his feet, with undaunted eye he surveys the realm of chaos, and then, opening his sail-broad wings, precipitates himself into the abyss.[10]
When the threefold gates of hell swing open before him, and the dark, endless ocean reveals its terror at his feet, he boldly surveys the chaotic realm and then, spreading his wide wings, dives into the abyss.[10]
To me this passage is one of the noblest efforts of imagination, and one of the most splendid journeys ever made, next to the journey round my room.{118}
To me, this passage is one of the most admirable uses of imagination and one of the most remarkable journeys ever taken, right up there with the journey round my room.{118}
XXXVIII.
The Bust.
I SHOULD never end if I tried to describe a thousandth part of the strange events I meet with when I travel in my library. The voyages of Cook and the observations of his fellow-travellers Banks and Solander are nothing compared with my adventures in this one district. Indeed, I think I could spend my life there in a kind of rapture, were it not for the bust I have already mentioned, upon which my eyes and thoughts always fix themselves at last, whatever may be the position of my soul. And when my soul is violently agitated, or a prey to despair, a glance at this bust suffices to restore the troubled being to its natural state. It sounds the chord upon{119} which I keep in tune the harmonies, and correct the discords of the sensations and perceptions of which my being is made up. How striking the likeness! Those are the features nature gave to the best of men. O, that the sculptor had been able to bring to view his noble soul, his genius, his character! But what am I attempting! Is it here that his praise should be recorded? Do I address myself to the men that surround me? Ah! what concern is it of theirs?
I SHOULD never stop if I tried to describe even a fraction of the strange things I encounter when I explore my library. The journeys of Cook and the notes from his fellow travelers Banks and Solander are nothing compared to my experiences in this one area. Honestly, I could spend my whole life there in a kind of bliss, if it weren't for the bust I mentioned earlier, which always draws my eyes and thoughts back to it, no matter my emotional state. When my soul is in turmoil or struggling with despair, just a glance at this bust is enough to bring me back to calm. It strikes the chord upon{119} that keeps in tune the harmonies and corrects the dissonance of the feelings and perceptions that make up my existence. How striking the likeness! Those are the features nature gave to the greatest of men. Oh, if only the sculptor had been able to capture his noble soul, his genius, his essence! But what am I even trying to do? Is this the right place for his praise? Am I speaking to the people around me? Ah! What do they care?
I am contented to bend before thy image, O best of fathers! Alas, that this should be all that is left me of thee and of my father-land! Thou quittedst the earth when crime was about to invade it; and so heavy are the ills that oppress thy family, that we are constrained to regard thy loss as a blessing. Many would have been the evils a longer life would have brought upon thee! And dost thou, O my father,{120} dost thou, in thine abode of bliss, know the lot of thy family! Knowest thou that thy children are exiled from the country thou hast served with so much zeal and integrity for sixty years?
I’m grateful to bow before your image, O best of fathers! It’s so sad that this is all that’s left of you and my homeland! You left this world just as crime was about to take over; and the burdens that weigh on your family are so great that we have to see your loss as a blessing. If you had lived longer, how many more problems would you have faced! And do you, O my father,{120} in your place of peace, know what has happened to your family? Do you know that your children are exiled from the country you served with such dedication and honesty for sixty years?
Dost thou know that they are forbidden to visit thy grave? But tyranny has not been able to deprive them of the most precious part of thy heritage, the record of thy virtues, and the force of thine example. In the midst of the torrent of crime which has borne their father-land and their patrimony to ruin, they have steadfastly remained united in the path marked out for them by thee. And when it shall be given them to prostrate themselves once more beside thy tomb, thou shalt see in them thine obedient children.{121}
Do you know that they are not allowed to visit your grave? But oppression hasn't been able to take away the most valuable part of your legacy, the record of your virtues and the strength of your example. Amid the flood of crime that has brought their homeland and inheritance to ruin, they have stood together on the path you laid out for them. And when they are able to kneel beside your tomb once again, you will see in them your obedient children.{121}
XXXIX.
A Dialogue.
I PROMISED a dialogue, and I will keep my word.
I PROMISED a conversation, and I will stick to that.
It was daybreak. The rays of the sun were gilding the summit of Mount Viso, and the tops of the highest hills on the island beneath our feet. My soul was already awake. This early awakening may have been the effect of those night visions which often excite in her a fatiguing and useless agitation: or perhaps the carnival, then drawing to a close, was the secret cause; for this season of pleasure and folly influences the human organization much as do the phases of the moon and the conjunction of certain planets. However this may be, my soul was awake, and wide awake, when she shook off the bands of sleep.{122}
It was dawn. The sun's rays were shining on the peak of Mount Viso and the tops of the tallest hills on the island below us. My spirit was already awake. This early awakening might have been caused by those night visions that often stir up a tiring and pointless restlessness in me; or maybe the carnival, which was then coming to an end, was the hidden reason, as this time of fun and chaos affects people much like the phases of the moon and the alignment of certain planets do. Regardless, my spirit was awake and fully alert when it shook off the chains of sleep.{122}
For some time she had shared, though confusedly, the sensations of the OTHER: but she was still encumbered by the swathes of night and sleep; and these swathes seemed to her transformed into gauze and fine linen and Indian lawn. My poor soul was, as it were, enwrapped in all this paraphernalia, and the god of sleep, that he might hold her still more firmly under his sway, added to these bonds disheveled tresses of flaxen hair, ribbon bows, and pearl necklaces. Really it was pitiful to see her struggle in these toils.
For a while, she had shared, though confusingly, the feelings of the OTHER: but she was still weighed down by the darkness and sleep; and these layers felt to her like gauze, fine linen, and lightweight fabric. My poor soul was, in a way, wrapped up in all this extra stuff, and the sleep god, wanting to keep her under his control, added to these restraints tangled strands of blonde hair, ribbon bows, and pearl necklaces. It was truly sad to watch her fight against these traps.
The agitation of the nobler part of myself communicated itself to the OTHER; and the latter, in its turn, reacted powerfully upon my soul.
The restlessness of the better part of me connected with the OTHER; and in turn, that influenced my soul deeply.
I worked myself, at last, into a state which it would be hard to describe, while my soul, either sagaciously or by chance, hit upon a way of escaping from the gauzes by which it was being suffocated. I know{123} not whether she discovered an outlet, or whether, which is a more natural conclusion, it occurred to her to raise them: at all events, she found a means of egress from the labyrinth. The tresses of disheveled hair were still there; but they were now rather help than hindrance; my soul seized them, as a drowning man clutches the sedge on a river’s bank, but the pearl necklace broke in the act, and the unstrung pearls rolled on the sofa, and from the sofa to Madame Hautcastel’s floor (for my soul, by an eccentricity for which it would be difficult to give a reason, fancied she was at that lady’s house); then a great bunch of violets fell to the ground, and my soul, which then awoke, returned home, bringing with her common sense and reality. She strongly disapproved, as you will readily imagine, of all that had passed in her absence; and here it is that the dialogue begins which forms the subject of this chapter.{124}
I finally managed to reach a state that’s hard to describe, while my soul, either wisely or by chance, found a way to escape from the suffocating layers surrounding it. I don’t know if she discovered an exit or if, more likely, she realized she could just lift them; either way, she found a way out of the maze. The tangled hair was still there, but now it helped rather than hindered; my soul grabbed onto it like a drowning person clings to reeds on a riverbank, but the pearl necklace broke in the process, and the loose pearls rolled onto the sofa, then onto Madame Hautcastel’s floor (for some reason, my soul fancied she was at her house); then a large bunch of violets fell to the ground, and as my soul awakened, she returned home, bringing back practicality and reality. She strongly disapproved, as you can imagine, of everything that happened while she was gone; and this is where the dialogue begins that’s the focus of this chapter.{124}
Never had my soul been so ungraciously received. The complaints she thought fit to make at this critical moment fully sufficed to stir up domestic strife; a revolt, a formal insurrection followed.
Never had my soul been received so poorly. The complaints she chose to voice at this critical moment were enough to spark domestic conflict; a rebellion, a full-scale uprising followed.
“What!” said my soul, “is it thus that during my absence, instead of restoring your strength by quiet sleep that you may be better able to do my bidding, you have the insolence (the expressing was rather strong) to give yourself up to transports which my authority has not sanctioned!”
“What!” said my soul, “is this how you spend your time while I’m away? Instead of restoring your strength with some peaceful sleep so you can better follow my commands, you have the nerve to indulge in pleasures that I haven’t approved!”
Little accustomed to this haughty tone, the OTHER angrily answered:—
Little used to this arrogant tone, the OTHER replied angrily:—
“Really, madame” (this madame was meant to remove from the discussion anything like familiarity), “really, this affectation of virtuous decorum is highly becoming to you! Is it not to the sallies of your imagination, and to your extravagant ideas, that I owe what in me displeases you? What right have you to go{125} on those pleasant excursions so often, without taking me with you? Have I ever complained about your attending the meetings in the Empyrean or in the Elysian fields, your conversations with the celestial intelligences, your profound speculations (a little raillery here, you see), your castles in the air, and your transcendental systems? And have I not a right, when you leave me in this way, to enjoy the blessings bestowed upon me by Nature, and the pleasures she places before me?”
“Honestly, ma'am” (this ma'am was meant to distance the conversation from any sense of familiarity), “honestly, this display of virtuous decorum really suits you! Isn't it true that I owe what you dislike in me to your vivid imagination and your extravagant ideas? What right do you have to go{125} on those lovely adventures so often without bringing me along? Have I ever complained about you attending those meetings in the Empyrean or Elysian fields, your talks with celestial beings, your deep thoughts (just a little teasing here, you see), your daydreams, and your lofty theories? And don't I have the right, when you leave me behind, to enjoy the gifts that Nature has given me and the pleasures she offers?”
My soul, surprised at so much vivacity and eloquence, did not know how to reply. In order to settle the dispute amicably, she endeavored to veil with the semblance of good-nature the reproaches that had escaped her. But, that she might not seem to take the first steps towards reconciliation, she affected a formal tone. “Madame,” she said, with assumed cordiality.... If the reader thought{126} the word misplaced when addressed to my soul, what will he say of it now, if he call to mind the cause of the quarrel? But my soul did not feel the extreme absurdity of this mode of expression, so much does passion obscure the intellect! “Madame,” she said, “nothing, be assured, would give me so much pleasure as to see you enjoy those pleasures of which your nature is susceptible, if even I did not participate in them, were it not that such pleasures are harmful to you, injuriously affecting the harmony which....” Here my soul was rudely interrupted, “No, no, I am not the dupe of your pretended kindness. The sojourn we are compelled to make together in this room in which we travel; the wound which I received, which still bleeds, and which nearly destroyed me,—is not all this the fruit of your overweening conceit and your barbarous prejudices? My comfort, my very existence, is counted as nothing when your{127} passions sway you: and then, forsooth, you pretend that you take an interest in my welfare, and that your insults spring from friendship.”
My soul, taken aback by so much energy and eloquence, didn’t know how to respond. To settle the disagreement peacefully, she tried to mask her accusations with a facade of friendliness. But, to avoid appearing as if she was making the first move toward reconciliation, she adopted a formal tone. “Madame,” she said, with feigned warmth.... If the reader thought{126} that word was inappropriate when directed at my soul, what will they think now, considering the reason for the argument? But my soul didn’t grasp the sheer absurdity of this way of speaking; passion can really cloud judgment! “Madame,” she said, “nothing would give me more pleasure than to see you enjoy the things that your nature craves, even if I don’t partake in them, if those pleasures weren’t harmful to you, disrupting the harmony which....” Here my soul was abruptly cut off, “No, no, I won’t fall for your fake kindness. The time we have to spend together in this room where we’re stuck, the wound I received that still bleeds and nearly destroyed me—all of this is the result of your arrogance and cruel biases. My comfort, my very existence, means nothing when your{127} passions take over: and yet, you pretend to care about my well-being, claiming that your insults come from friendship.”
My soul saw very well that the part she was playing on this occasion was no flattering one. She began, too, to perceive that the warmth of the dispute had put the cause of it out of sight. Profiting from this circumstance, she caused a further distraction by saying to Joannetti, who at that moment entered the room, “Make some coffee!” The noise of the cups attracted all the rebel’s attention, who forthwith forgot everything else. In like manner we show children a toy to make them forget the unwholesome fruit for which they beg and stamp.
My soul realized that the role she was playing wasn't a flattering one. She also started to notice that the intensity of the argument had overshadowed its original point. Taking advantage of this, she distracted everyone further by telling Joannetti, who just walked into the room, “Make some coffee!” The sound of the cups grabbed the rebel's attention, making them forget everything else. Similarly, we show children a toy to distract them from the unhealthy fruit they're crying for.
While the water was being heated, I insensibly fell asleep. I enjoyed that delightful sensation about which I have already entertained my readers, and which{128} you experience when you feel yourself to be dozing. The agreeable rattling Joannetti made with the coffee-pot reëchoed in my brain, and set all my sensitive nerves vibrating, just as a single harp-string when struck will make the octaves resound.
While the water was heating up, I unknowingly dozed off. I loved that pleasant feeling I've mentioned before, which{128} you get when you realize you're starting to fall asleep. The nice clattering noise Joannetti was making with the coffee pot echoed in my head and sent all my sensitive nerves buzzing, like how a single harp string, when played, makes the octaves resonate.
At last I saw as it were, a shadow pass before me. I opened my eyes, and there stood Joannetti. Ah, what an aroma! How agreeable a surprise! Coffee! Cream! A pyramid of dry toast! Good reader, come, breakfast with me!{129}
At last, I saw, like a shadow, pass before me. I opened my eyes, and there stood Joannetti. Ah, what a smell! What a lovely surprise! Coffee! Cream! A stack of dry toast! Good reader, come, have breakfast with me!{129}
XL.
Imagination.
WHAT a wealth of delights has kind Nature given to those who can enjoy them. Who can count the innumerable phases they assume in different individuals, and at different periods of life! The confused remembrance of the pleasures of my boyhood sends a thrill through my heart. Shall I attempt to paint the joys of the youth whose soul glows with all the warmth of love, at an age when interest, ambition, hatred, and all the base passions that degrade and torment humanity are unknown to him, even by name?
WHAT a treasure of joys has nature offered to those who can appreciate them. Who can count the countless ways they appear in different people and at different stages of life? The hazy memories of the pleasures from my childhood send a shiver through my heart. Should I try to depict the happiness of a young person whose heart is full of love, at an age when feelings like greed, ambition, hatred, and all the petty emotions that lower and torment humanity are completely unfamiliar to him, even by name?
During this age, too short, alas! the sun shines with a brightness it never displays in after-life; the air is then purer, the{130} streams clearer and fresher, and nature has aspects, and the woods have paths, which in our riper age we never find again. O, what perfumes those flowers breathe! How delicious are those fruits! With what colors is the morning sky adorned! Men are all good, generous, kind-hearted; and women all lovely and faithful. On all sides we meet with cordiality, frankness, and unselfishness. Nature presents to us nothing but flowers, virtues, and pleasures.
During this brief stage of life, unfortunately! the sun shines with a brightness it never shows later on; the air is clearer, the{130} streams are fresher and purer, and nature has features, and the forests have paths, that we never encounter again in our older age. Oh, what scents those flowers release! How delicious those fruits are! How beautifully colored the morning sky is! Everyone is kind, generous, and warm-hearted; and all women are beautiful and loyal. Everywhere we encounter friendliness, openness, and selflessness. Nature offers us nothing but flowers, virtues, and joys.
The excitement of love, and the anticipation of happiness, do they not fill our hearts to the brim with emotions no less lively and various?
The thrill of love and the hope for happiness, don’t they fill our hearts to the brim with just as many lively and varied emotions?
The sight of nature and its contemplation, whether we regard it as a whole, or examine its details, opens to our reason an immense field of enjoyments. Soon the imagination, brooding over this sea of pleasures, increases their number and intensity. The various sensations so unite{131} and blend as to form new ones. Dreams of glory mingle with the palpitations of love. Benevolence moves hand in hand with self-esteem. Melancholy, from time to time, throws over us her solemn livery, and changes our tears to joy. Thus the perceptions of the mind, the feelings of the heart, the very remembrance of sensations, are inexhaustible sources of pleasure and comfort to man. No wonder, then, that the noise Joannetti made with the coffee-pot, and the unexpected appearance of a cup of cream, should have impressed me so vividly and so agreeably.{132}
The beauty of nature and taking the time to appreciate it, whether we look at it as a whole or focus on its details, presents us with a vast array of pleasures. Before long, our imagination, reflecting on this sea of delights, amplifies their number and impact. Different sensations come together and intertwine to create new experiences. Aspirations for greatness blend with the intensity of love. Kindness walks hand in hand with self-worth. Occasionally, melancholy wraps us in her somber cloak, turning our tears into joy. Thus, our thoughts, emotions, and even memories of sensations become endless sources of joy and comfort for us. It’s no surprise that the noise Joannetti made with the coffee pot and the surprise of a cup of cream left such a vivid and pleasant impression on me.{132}
XLI.
The Travelling-coat.
I PUT on my travelling-coat, after having examined it with a complacent eye; and forthwith resolved to write a chapter ad hoc, that I might make it known to the reader.
I PUT on my travel coat, after checking it with a satisfied glance; and immediately decided to write a chapter ad hoc, so I could share it with the reader.
The form and usefulness of these garments being pretty generally known, I will treat specially of their influence upon the minds of travellers.
The style and practicality of these garments are fairly well understood, so I will specifically discuss how they affect the thoughts of travelers.
My winter travelling-coat is made of the warmest and softest stuff I could meet with. It envelops me entirely from head to foot, and when I am in my arm-chair, with my hands in my pockets, I am very like the statue of Vishnu one sees in the pagodas of India.{133}
My winter travel coat is made of the warmest and softest material I could find. It wraps around me completely from head to toe, and when I'm sitting in my armchair with my hands in my pockets, I look a lot like the statue of Vishnu that you see in the pagodas of India.{133}
You may, if you will, tax me with prejudice when I assert the influence a traveller’s costume exercises upon its wearer. At any rate I can confidently affirm with regard to this matter, that it would appear to me as ridiculous to take a single step of my journey round my room in uniform, with my sword at my side, as it would to go forth into the world in my dressing-gown. Were I to find myself in full military dress, not only should I be unable to proceed with my journey, but I really believe I should not be able to read what I have written about my travels, still less to understand it.
You may think I'm biased when I say that a traveler's outfit has a significant impact on the person wearing it. Regardless, I can confidently say that it would seem just as absurd to take even one step around my room in uniform, with my sword by my side, as it would to step out into the world in my bathrobe. If I were dressed in full military gear, not only would I struggle to continue my journey, but I honestly don't think I'd be able to read what I've written about my travels, let alone understand it.
Does this surprise you? Do we not every day meet with people who fancy they are ill because they are unshaven, or because some one has thought they have looked poorly, and told them so? Dress has such influence upon men’s minds that there are valetudinarians who think them{134}selves in better health than usual when they have on a new coat and well-powdered wig. They deceive the public and themselves by their nicety about dress, until one finds some fine morning they have died in full fig, and their death startles everybody.
Does this surprise you? Don’t we encounter people every day who think they're sick just because they're unshaven or because someone remarked that they looked unwell? How we dress has such a strong impact on our mindset that there are hypochondriacs who believe they're healthier than usual when they're wearing a new coat and a nicely styled wig. They fool both the public and themselves with their obsession with appearance, until one day we find out they've passed away while dressed to the nines, and their death shocks everyone.
And in the class of men among whom I live, how many there are who, finding themselves clothed in uniform, firmly believe they are officers, until the unexpected appearance of the enemy shows them their mistake. And more than this, if it be the king’s good pleasure to allow one of them to add to his coat a certain trimming, he straightway believes himself to be a general, and the whole army gives him the title without any notion of making fun of him! So great an influence has a coat upon the human imagination!
And in the group of men I hang out with, there are so many who, when they put on a uniform, truly believe they're officers, until the sudden arrival of the enemy reveals their error. Moreover, if it's the king’s wish to let one of them add some fancy trim to his coat, he instantly thinks he's a general, and the entire army calls him that without a clue that they’re laughing at him! A coat really has that much power over the human imagination!
The following illustration will show still further the truth of my assertion.{135}
The following illustration will further demonstrate the truth of my statement.{135}
It sometimes happened that they forgot to inform the Count de —— some days beforehand of the approach of his turn to mount guard. Early one morning, on the very day on which this duty fell to the Count, a corporal awoke him, and announced the disagreeable news. But the idea of getting up there and then, putting on his gaiters, and turning out without having thought about it the evening before, so disturbed him that he preferred reporting himself sick and staying at home all day. So he put on his dressing-gown, and sent away his barber. This made him look pale and ill, and frightened his wife and family. He really did feel a little poorly.
It sometimes happened that they forgot to let the Count de —— know a few days in advance that it was his turn to go on guard. One early morning, on the very day he was scheduled for this duty, a corporal woke him up and delivered the unpleasant news. The thought of getting up right then, putting on his boots, and heading out without having thought about it the night before upset him so much that he chose to call in sick and stay home all day. So, he put on his robe and sent his barber away. This made him look pale and unwell, which frightened his wife and family. He really did feel a bit off.
He told every one he was not very well, partly for the sake of appearances, and partly because he positively believed himself to be indisposed. Gradually the influence of the dressing-gown began to work.{136} The slops he was obliged to take upset his stomach. His relations and friends sent to ask after him. He was soon quite ill enough to take to his bed.
He told everyone he wasn’t feeling well, partly for appearances and partly because he genuinely believed he was sick. Gradually, the effect of wearing the dressing gown started to take hold.{136} The medicine he had to take upset his stomach. His family and friends checked in on him. Before long, he was sick enough to stay in bed.
In the evening Dr. Ranson[11] found his pulse hard and feverish, and ordered him to be bled next day.
In the evening, Dr. Ranson[11] found his pulse strong and feverish, and scheduled him to be bled the next day.
If the campaign had lasted a month longer, the sick man’s case would have been past cure.
If the campaign had gone on for another month, the sick man would have been beyond help.
Now, who can doubt about the influence of travelling-coats upon travellers, if he reflect that poor Count de —— thought more than once that he was about to perform a journey to the other world for having inopportunely donned his dressing-gown in this?{137}
Now, who can doubt the impact of traveling coats on travelers, if they consider that poor Count de —— thought more than once that he was about to embark on a journey to the afterlife simply for having inopportunely worn his dressing gown? {137}

XLII.
Aspasia’s Buskin.
I WAS sitting near my fire after dinner, enveloped in my “habit de voyage,” and freely abandoning myself to its influence: the hour for starting was, I knew, drawing nigh; but the fumes generated by digestion rose to my brain, and so obstructed the channels along which thoughts glide on their way from the senses, that all communication between them was intercepted. And as my senses no longer transmitted any idea to my brain, the latter, in its turn, could no longer emit{138} any of that electric fluid with which the ingenious Doctor Valli resuscitates dead frogs.
I WAS sitting by my fire after dinner, wrapped in my travel outfit, and fully succumbing to its effects: I knew the time to leave was getting close; however, the sensations from digestion clouded my mind, blocking the pathways through which thoughts flow from the senses. Since my senses no longer relayed any ideas to my brain, it could no longer produce{138} any of that electric energy that the clever Doctor Valli uses to bring dead frogs back to life.
After reading this preamble, you will easily understand why my head fell on my chest, and why the muscles of the thumb and forefinger of my right hand, being no longer excited by the electric fluid, became so relaxed that a volume of the works of the Marquis Caraccioli, which I was holding tightly between these two fingers, imperceptibly eluded my grasp, and fell upon the hearth.
After reading this introduction, you will easily see why my head dropped to my chest, and why the muscles in my thumb and forefinger of my right hand, no longer energized by the electric charge, became so loose that a volume of the works of the Marquis Caraccioli, which I was holding tightly between these two fingers, quietly slipped from my grip and fell onto the fireplace.
I had just had some callers, and my conversation with the persons who had left the room had turned upon the death of Dr. Cigna, an eminent physician then lately deceased. He was a learned and hard-working man, a good naturalist, and a famous botanist. My thoughts were occupied with the merits of this skillful man. “And yet,” I said to myself, “were it{139} possible for me to evoke the spirits of those whom he has, perhaps, dismissed to the other world, who knows but that his reputation might suffer some diminution?”
I had just had some visitors, and my conversation with the people who had left the room had turned to the death of Dr. Cigna, a well-known doctor who had recently passed away. He was a knowledgeable and hardworking man, a great naturalist, and a renowned botanist. My thoughts were focused on the accomplishments of this skilled individual. “And yet,” I thought to myself, “if I could somehow summon the spirits of those he may have sent to the afterlife, who knows if his reputation might take a hit?”
I travelled insensibly to a dissertation on medicine and the progress it has made since the time of Hippocrates. I asked myself whether the famous personages of antiquity who died in their beds, as Pericles, Plato, the celebrated Aspasia, and Hippocrates, died, after the manner of ordinary mortals, of some putrid or inflammatory fever; and whether they were bled, and crammed with specifics.
I found myself reflecting on a dissertation about medicine and the advancements it has made since Hippocrates' time. I wondered if the well-known figures from ancient times, who passed away in their beds, like Pericles, Plato, the famous Aspasia, and Hippocrates, died like regular people from some kind of infection or fever; and whether they were bled and treated with various remedies.
To say why these four personages came into my mind rather than any others, is out of my power; for who can give reasons for what he dreams? All that I can say is that my soul summoned the doctor of Cos, the doctor of Turin, and the famous statesman who did such great things, and committed such grave faults.{140}
I can't explain why these four characters popped into my head instead of any others; who can really explain their dreams? All I can say is that my mind called upon the doctor from Cos, the doctor from Turin, and the renowned statesman who accomplished remarkable things but also made serious mistakes.{140}
But as to his graceful friend, I humbly own that it was the OTHER who beckoned her to come. Still, however, when I think of the interview, I am tempted to feel some little pride, for it is evident that in this dream the balance in favor of reason was as four to one. Pretty fair this, methinks, for a lieutenant.
But when it comes to his graceful friend, I admit it was the OTHER who signaled her to approach. Still, when I reflect on the meeting, I'm a bit tempted to feel some pride, because it’s clear that in this dream, reason had a clear advantage of four to one. That's pretty impressive, I think, for a lieutenant.
However this may be, whilst giving myself up to the reflections I have described, my eyes closed, and I fell fast asleep. But upon shutting my eyes, the image of the personages of whom I had been thinking, remained painted upon that delicate canvas we call memory; and these images, mingling in my brain with the idea of the evocation of the dead, it was not long before I saw advancing in procession Hippocrates, Plato, Pericles, Aspasia, and Doctor Cigna in his bob-wig.
However this may be, while I was lost in the thoughts I mentioned, my eyes closed, and I fell into a deep sleep. But as I shut my eyes, the images of the people I had been thinking about stayed vivid on that delicate canvas we call memory; and these images, blending in my mind with the idea of calling back the dead, it wasn't long before I saw Hippocrates, Plato, Pericles, Aspasia, and Doctor Cigna in his bob-wig coming forward in a procession.
I saw them all seat themselves in chairs ranged around the fire. Pericles alone remained standing to read the newspapers.{141}
I watched as everyone took their seats in chairs arranged around the fire. Pericles was the only one who stayed standing to read the newspapers.{141}
“If the discoveries of which you speak were true,” said Hippocrates to the doctor, “and had they been as useful to the healing art as you affirm, I should have seen the number of those who daily descend to the gloomy realm of Pluto decrease; but the ratio of its inhabitants, according to the registers of Minos which I have myself verified, remains still the same as formerly.”
“If the discoveries you’re talking about were true,” Hippocrates said to the doctor, “and if they were as helpful to healing as you claim, I would have noticed a drop in the number of people who die every day. However, the count of those in the gloomy realm of Pluto, according to the records of Minos that I have verified myself, remains unchanged.”
Doctor Cigna turned to me and said: “You have without doubt heard these discoveries spoken of. You know that Harvey discovered the circulation of the blood; that the immortal Spallanzani explained the process of digestion, the mechanism of which is now well understood;” and he entered upon a long detail of all the discoveries connected with physic, and of the host of remedies for which we are indebted to chemistry: in short, he delivered an academical discourse in favor of modern medicine.{142}
Doctor Cigna turned to me and said, “You’ve definitely heard about these discoveries. You know that Harvey found out how blood circulates; that the brilliant Spallanzani explained digestion, which we now understand well;” and he went on to detail all the discoveries in physics and the many remedies we owe to chemistry: in short, he gave a lecture in support of modern medicine.{142}
“But am I to believe,” I replied, “that these great men were ignorant of all you have been telling them, and that their souls, having shuffled off this mortal coil, still meet with any obscurities in nature?”
“But am I supposed to believe,” I replied, “that these great men were unaware of everything you’ve been telling them, and that their souls, having left this mortal life, still encounter any mysteries in nature?”
“Ah! how great is your error!” exclaimed the proto-physician[12] of the Peloponnesus. The mysteries of nature are as closely hidden from the dead as from the living. Of one thing we who linger on the banks of the Styx are certain, that He who created all things alone knows the great secret which men vainly strive to solve. “And,” added he, turning to the doctor, “do be persuaded by me to divest yourself of what still clings to you of the party-spirit you have brought with you from the sojourn of mortals. And since, seeing that Charon daily ferries over in his boat as many shades as heretofore, the labors of a thousand generations and all the discov{143}eries men have made have not been able to prolong their existence, let us not uselessly weary ourselves in defending an art which, among the dead, cannot even profit its practitioners.”
“Ah! how wrong you are!” exclaimed the proto-physician[12] of the Peloponnesus. The mysteries of nature are just as hidden from the dead as they are from the living. One thing we who linger by the banks of the Styx are sure of is that He who created everything alone knows the great secret that people vainly try to uncover. “And,” he added, turning to the doctor, “please take my advice and let go of the party spirit that still clings to you from your time among the living. And since Charon continues to ferry as many shades across in his boat as he always has, the efforts of a thousand generations and all the discoveries made by humankind have not been able to extend their existence, let’s not tire ourselves out defending a practice that, among the dead, cannot even benefit its practitioners.”
Thus, to my great amazement, spoke the famous Hippocrates.
Thus, to my great surprise, spoke the famous Hippocrates.
Doctor Cigna smiled; and as spirits can neither withstand evidence, nor silence truth, he not only agreed with Hippocrates, but, blushing after the manner of disembodied intelligences, he protested that he had himself always had his doubts.
Doctor Cigna smiled; and since spirits can't fight against evidence or ignore the truth, he not only agreed with Hippocrates but, blushing like a ghost, he insisted that he had always had his doubts as well.
Pericles, who had drawn near the window, heaved a deep sigh, the cause of which I divined. He was reading a number of the “Moniteur,” which announced the decadence of the arts and sciences. He saw illustrious scholars desert their sublime conceptions to invent new crimes, and shuddered at hearing a rabble herd compare themselves with the heroes of{144} generous Greece; and this, forsooth, because they put to death, without shame or remorse, venerable old men, women, and children, and coolly perpetrated the blackest and most useless crimes.
Pericles, who had moved closer to the window, let out a deep sigh, and I understood why. He was reading several issues of the “Moniteur,” which reported on the decline of the arts and sciences. He watched as great scholars abandoned their brilliant ideas to come up with new crimes, and he recoiled at hearing a mob compare themselves to the heroes of{144} noble Greece; all because they callously executed respected elders, women, and children, committing the most terrible and pointless atrocities without any shame or regret.
Plato, who had listened to our conversation without joining in it, and seeing it brought to a sudden and unexpected close, thus spoke: “I can readily understand that the discoveries great men have made in the various branches of natural science do not forward the art of medicine, which can never change the course of nature, except at the cost of life. But this will certainly not be so with the researches that have been made in the study of politics. Locke’s inquiries into the nature of the human understanding, the invention of printing, the accumulated observations drawn from history, the number of excellent books which have spread sound information even among the lower orders,—so{145} many wonders must have contributed to make men better, and the happy republic I conceived, which the age in which I lived caused me to regard as an impracticable dream, no doubt now exists upon the earth?” At this question the honest doctor cast down his eyes, and only answered by tears. In wiping them with his pocket-handkerchief, he involuntarily moved his wig on one side, so that a part of his face was hidden by it. “Ye gods!” exclaimed Aspasia, with a scream, “how strange a sight! And is it a discovery of one of your great men that has led you to the idea of turning another man’s skull into a head-dress?”
Plato, who had listened to our conversation without participating, and seeing it come to a sudden and unexpected end, spoke up: “I can easily understand that the great discoveries in various fields of natural science don’t really help the practice of medicine, which can only alter nature at the expense of life. But the same cannot be said for the work done in politics. Locke’s studies on human understanding, the invention of printing, the wealth of observations from history, and the many excellent books that have shared valuable knowledge even among the lower classes—so{145} many marvels must have contributed to making people better, and I can’t help but wonder if the ideal republic I imagined, which I thought to be an unrealistic dream in my time, now truly exists in the world?” Upon hearing this, the honest doctor lowered his gaze and only responded with tears. As he wiped his tears with his handkerchief, he accidentally tilted his wig, obscuring part of his face. “Oh my gods!” cried Aspasia with a gasp, “What a strange sight! Is it a discovery from your great thinkers that made you think it was okay to use someone else's skull as a headpiece?”
Aspasia, from whom our philosophical dissertations had elicited nothing but gapes, had taken up a magazine of fashions which lay on the chimney-piece, the leaves of which she had been turning over for some time when the doctor’s wig made{146} her utter this exclamation. Finding the narrow, ricketty seat upon which she was sitting uncomfortable, she had, without the least ceremony, placed her two bare legs, which were adorned with bandelets, on the straw-bottomed chair between her and me, and rested her elbow upon the broad shoulders of Plato.
Aspasia, who had only made us yawn with our philosophical discussions, had picked up a fashion magazine that was sitting on the mantel. She had been flipping through its pages for a while when the sight of the doctor’s wig made{146} her exclaim. Finding the narrow, wobbly seat she was on uncomfortable, she casually put her two bare legs, decorated with bandelets, on the straw-bottomed chair between us and rested her elbow on Plato's broad shoulders.
“It is no skull,” said the doctor, addressing her, and taking off his wig, which he threw on the fire, “it is a wig, madam; and I know not why I did not cast this ridiculous ornament into the flames of Tartarus when first I came among you. But absurdities and prejudices adhere so closely to our miserable nature that they even follow us sometimes beyond the grave.” I took singular pleasure in seeing the doctor thus abjure his physic and his wig at the same moment.
“It’s not a skull,” the doctor said to her, taking off his wig and tossing it into the fire. “It’s a wig, madam; and I don’t know why I didn’t throw this ridiculous thing into the flames of hell when I first came here. But absurdities and prejudices cling so tightly to our miserable nature that they sometimes even follow us beyond the grave.” I found it oddly satisfying to see the doctor reject his medicine and his wig all at once.
“I assure you,” said Aspasia, “that most of the head-dresses represented in the{147} pages I have been turning over deserve the same fate as yours, so very extravagant are they.”
“I promise you,” said Aspasia, “that most of the hairstyles shown in the{147} pages I’ve been flipping through deserve the same fate as yours, they’re so extravagant.”
The fair Athenian amused herself vastly in looking over the engravings, and was very reasonably surprised by the variety and oddity of modern contrivances. One figure, especially struck her. It was that of a young lady with a really elegant head-dress which Aspasia only thought somewhat too high. But the piece of gauze that covered the neck was so very full you could scarcely see half her face. Aspasia, not knowing that these extraordinary developments were produced by starch, could not help showing a surprise which would have been redoubled (but inversely), had the gauze been transparent.
The charming Athenian was thoroughly entertained as she browsed through the engravings, and she was quite reasonably amazed by the variety and uniqueness of modern inventions. One figure, in particular, caught her attention. It was of a young woman wearing a truly elegant headdress, which Aspasia thought was just a bit too tall. But the piece of gauze covering her neck was so full that you could hardly see half her face. Aspasia, not realizing that these extravagant designs were created using starch, couldn’t hide her surprise, which would have been even greater (but in the opposite way) if the gauze had been see-through.
“But do explain,” she said, “why women of the present day seem to wear dresses to hide rather than to clothe them. They scarcely allow their faces to be seen,{148} those faces by which alone their sex is to be guessed, so strangely are their bodies disfigured by the eccentric folds of their garments. Among all the figures represented in these pages, I do not find one with the neck, arms, and legs bare. How is it your young warriors are not tempted to put an end to such a fashion? It would appear,” she added, “that the virtue of the women of this age, which they parade in all their articles of dress, greatly surpasses that of my contemporaries.”
“But please explain,” she said, “why women today seem to wear dresses that hide rather than show their bodies. They hardly let their faces be seen,{148} those faces by which we can recognize their gender, since their bodies are so oddly obscured by the strange folds of their clothes. Among all the figures shown in these pages, I don’t see a single one with bare necks, arms, or legs. Why aren’t your young men tempted to put an end to this trend? It seems,” she added, “that the virtue of the women of this time, which they flaunt in all their clothing, is far superior to that of my contemporaries.”
As she ended these words, Aspasia turned her eyes on me as if to ask a reply. I pretended not to notice this, and in order to give myself an absent air, took up the tongs and pushed away among the embers the shreds of the doctor’s wig which had escaped the flames. Observing presently afterwards that one of the bandelets which clasped Aspasia’s buskin had come undone,{149} “Permit me,” said I, “charming lady,”—and eagerly stooping, stretched out my hands towards the chair on which I had fancied I saw those legs about which even great philosophers went into ecstacies.
As she finished speaking, Aspasia looked at me as if waiting for a response. I pretended not to notice and, to seem distracted, picked up the tongs and pushed aside the remnants of the doctor's wig that had escaped the flames. After a moment, I noticed that one of the straps on Aspasia's boot had come undone. {149} “Allow me,” I said, “beautiful lady,”—and eagerly bending down, I reached for the chair where I thought I saw those legs that even great philosophers admired.
I am persuaded that at this moment I was very near genuine somnambulism, so real was the movement of which I speak. But Rose, who happened to be sleeping in the chair, thought the movement was meant for her, and jumping nimbly into my arms, she drove back into Hades the famous shades my travelling-coat had summoned.{150}
I believe that right then, I was really close to true sleepwalking, the movement I’m describing felt so real. But Rose, who was asleep in the chair, thought the movement was meant for her. She quickly jumped into my arms, sending back to Hades the famous spirits my travel coat had called forth.{150}
Liberty.
DELIGHTFUL realm of Imagination, which the benevolent Being has bestowed upon man to console him for the disappointments he meets with in real life.
DELIGHTFUL realm of Imagination, which the kind Creator has given to humanity to comfort us for the letdowns we face in real life.
This day, certain persons on whom I am dependent affect to restore me to liberty. As if they had ever deprived me of it! As if it were in their power to snatch it from me for a single moment, and to hinder me from traversing, at my own good pleasure, the vast space that ever lies open before me! They have forbidden me to go at large in a city, a mere speck, and have left open to me the whole universe, in which immensity and eternity obey me.
This day, some people I rely on pretend to give me my freedom back. As if they ever took it away! As if they could take it from me for even a moment, stopping me from exploring the vast space that’s always available to me! They’ve restricted me from moving around freely in a tiny city, yet they’ve left the entire universe open to me, where I reign over the infinite and the eternal.
I am now free, then; or rather, I must enter again into bondage. The yoke of{151} office is again to weigh me down, and every step I take must conform with the exigencies of politeness and duty. Fortunate shall I be if some capricious goddess do not again make me forget both, and if I escape from this new and dangerous captivity.
I am free now, or rather, I have to enter into bondage again. The burden of{151} office is going to weigh me down again, and every step I take has to follow the demands of politeness and duty. I’ll be lucky if some unpredictable goddess doesn’t make me forget both again, and if I manage to escape from this new and risky confinement.
O why did they not allow me to finish my captivity! Was it as a punishment that I was exiled to my chamber, to that delightful country in which abound all the riches and enjoyments of the world? As well might they consign a mouse to a granary.
O why didn't they let me finish my confinement! Was it a punishment to be sent to my room, that lovely place filled with all the wealth and pleasures of the world? It would be just as reasonable to lock a mouse in a grain store.
Still, never did I more clearly perceive that I am double than I do now. Whilst I regret my imaginary joys, I feel myself consoled. I am borne along by an unseen power which tells me I need the pure air, and the light of heaven, and that solitude is like death. Once more I don my customary garb; my door opens; I wander under{152} the spacious porticos of the Strada della Po; a thousand agreeable visions float before my eyes. Yes, there is that mansion, that door, that staircase! I thrill with expectation.
Still, I’ve never been more aware of my duality than I am now. While I miss my imaginary joys, I also find comfort in this realization. I’m carried along by an unseen force that tells me I need fresh air and sunlight, and that being alone is like being dead. Once again, I put on my usual clothes; my door opens; I stroll beneath{152} the wide porches of the Strada della Po; a thousand pleasant images dance before my eyes. Yes, there’s that house, that door, that staircase! I feel a thrill of anticipation.
In like manner the act of slicing a lemon gives you a foretaste that makes your mouth water.
Slicing a lemon makes your mouth water in anticipation.
Poor ANIMAL! Take care!
Poor animal! Take care!
FOOTNOTES:
FOOTNOTES:
[1] Bête is not translatable here. The English word animal is hardly nearer than beast. Bête is a milder word than beast, and when used metaphorically, implies silliness rather than brutality. In some cases our creature would translate it, Pauvre bête! Poor creature!
[1] Bête doesn't have a direct translation here. The English word animal is not much closer than beast. Bête is a softer word than beast, and when used metaphorically, it suggests foolishness rather than cruelty. In some cases, our creature would fit as a translation, Pauvre bête! Poor creature!
[2] Vide Werther, chapter xxviii.
[3] The reader will probably have been reminded of the “Sentimental Journey” before reaching this proof of our author’s acquaintance with the writings of Sterne.
[3] The reader will likely recall the “Sentimental Journey” by the time they get to this evidence of the author's familiarity with Sterne's works.
H. A.
H. A.
[5] This work was not published.
This work was never published.
[6] The botanical garden of Turin.
The botanical garden in Turin.
[7] Richardson’s Clarissa Harlowe.
__A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__ Richardson’s Clarissa.
[8] Goethe’s Werther.
__A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__ Goethe’s Werther.
[9] Cleveland, by the Abbé Prévost.
[10] Some freedom of translation is, perhaps, pardonable here. Our author, depending, it would seem, upon his memory, gives Satan wings large enough “to cover a whole army.” It was “the extended wings” of the gates of hell, not of Satan, that Milton describes as wide enough to admit a “bannered host.” Paradise Lost, ii. 885.
[10] Some leeway in translation may be acceptable here. Our author, seemingly relying on his memory, gives Satan wings big enough “to cover a whole army.” It was “the extended wings” of the gates of hell, not of Satan, that Milton describes as wide enough to let in a “bannered host.” Paradise Lost, ii. 885.
H. A.
H. A.
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