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OUR OLD HOME

A Series of English Sketches



by Nathaniel Hawthorne










To Franklin Pierce,

As a Slight Memorial of a College Friendship, prolonged through Manhood, and retaining all its Vitality in our Autumnal Years,

This Volume is inscribed by NATHANIEL HAWTHORNE.

TO A FRIEND.

To Franklin Pierce,

A small reminder of a college friendship that grew into adulthood and remains strong in our later years,

This book is dedicated by Nathaniel Hawthorne.

TO A FRIEND.

I have not asked your consent, my dear General, to the foregoing inscription, because it would have been no inconsiderable disappointment to me had you withheld it; for I have long desired to connect your name with some book of mine, in commemoration of an early friendship that has grown old between two individuals of widely dissimilar pursuits and fortunes. I only wish that the offering were a worthier one than this volume of sketches, which certainly are not of a kind likely to prove interesting to a statesman in retirement, inasmuch as they meddle with no matters of policy or government, and have very little to say about the deeper traits of national character. In their humble way, they belong entirely to aesthetic literature, and can achieve no higher success than to represent to the American reader a few of the external aspects of English scenery and life, especially those that are touched with the antique charm to which our countrymen are more susceptible than are the people among whom it is of native growth.

I haven’t asked for your approval, dear General, for the inscription above because it would have been a significant disappointment if you had refused; I’ve long wanted to connect your name with one of my books to honor an early friendship that has lasted between two very different people with distinct paths and fortunes. I only wish that this gift were something more deserving than this collection of sketches, which probably won’t interest a retired statesman, as they don’t deal with any political or governmental issues and have little to say about the deeper aspects of national character. In their own modest way, they belong entirely to aesthetic literature and can achieve no greater success than to show the American reader a few external features of English scenery and life, especially those touched by the antique charm that our countrymen are more drawn to than those who are native to it.

I once hoped, indeed, that so slight a volume would not be all that I might write. These and other sketches, with which, in a somewhat rougher form than I have given them here, my journal was copiously filled, were intended for the side-scenes and backgrounds and exterior adornment of a work of fiction of which the plan had imperfectly developed itself in my mind, and into which I ambitiously proposed to convey more of various modes of truth than I could have grasped by a direct effort. Of course, I should not mention this abortive project, only that it has been utterly thrown aside and will never now be accomplished. The Present, the Immediate, the Actual, has proved too potent for me. It takes away not only my scanty faculty, but even my desire for imaginative composition, and leaves me sadly content to scatter a thousand peaceful fantasies upon the hurricane that is sweeping us all along with it, possibly, into a Limbo where our nation and its polity may be as literally the fragments of a shattered dream as my unwritten Romance. But I have far better hopes for our dear country; and for my individual share of the catastrophe, I afflict myself little, or not at all, and shall easily find room for the abortive work on a certain ideal shelf, where are reposited many other shadowy volumes of mine, more in number, and very much superior in quality, to those which I have succeeded in rendering actual.

I once hoped that this small book wouldn’t be all I’d write. These and other sketches, which filled my journal in a rougher form than I’ve presented here, were meant to be the side scenes, backgrounds, and decorative details of a fictional work that only partially took shape in my mind. I had ambitious plans to convey more truths through it than I could have grasped directly. I wouldn't mention this failed project except that it's been completely abandoned and will never be realized. The Present, the Immediate, the Actual has proven too overwhelming for me. It takes away not only my limited ability but even my desire for creative writing, leaving me resigned to scatter a thousand peaceful fantasies in the tumult that is sweeping us all along, possibly toward a Limbo where our nation and its politics might be just as fragmented as my unwritten story. However, I have much better hopes for our beloved country. As for my personal share of the disaster, I worry little, if at all, and will easily make space for the unfinished work on an ideal shelf, alongside many other vague volumes of mine, which outnumber and greatly surpass in quality those I’ve managed to bring to life.

To return to these poor Sketches; some of my friends have told me that they evince an asperity of sentiment towards the English people which I ought not to feel, and which it is highly inexpedient to express. The charge surprises me, because, if it be true, I have written from a shallower mood than I supposed. I seldom came into personal relations with an Englishman without beginning to like him, and feeling my favorable impression wax stronger with the progress of the acquaintance. I never stood in an English crowd without being conscious of hereditary sympathies. Nevertheless, it is undeniable that an American is continually thrown upon his national antagonism by some acrid quality in the moral atmosphere of England. These people think so loftily of themselves, and so contemptuously of everybody else, that it requires more generosity than I possess to keep always in perfectly good-humor with them. Jotting down the little acrimonies of the moment in my journal, and transferring them thence (when they happened to be tolerably well expressed) to these pages, it is very possible that I may have said things which a profound observer of national character would hesitate to sanction, though never any, I verily believe, that had not more or less of truth. If they be true, there is no reason in the world why they should not be said. Not an Englishman of them all ever spared America for courtesy's sake or kindness; nor, in my opinion, would it contribute in the least to our mutual advantage and comfort if we were to besmear one another all over with butter and honey. At any rate, we must not judge of an Englishman's susceptibilities by our own, which, likewise, I trust, are of a far less sensitive texture than formerly.

To get back to these unfortunate Sketches; some of my friends have told me that they show a bitterness towards the English people that I shouldn’t feel, and it’s really unwise to express. I’m surprised by this accusation because, if it’s true, I must have written from a mindset that’s shallower than I thought. I rarely interacted with an Englishman without starting to like him, and I found my positive feelings grew stronger as our relationship developed. I never stood in an English crowd without feeling a sense of inherited connection. Still, it’s true that an American is often faced with their national rivalry due to some harsh quality in the moral atmosphere of England. These people have such a high opinion of themselves and look down on everyone else, which makes it harder for me to stay in a good mood around them. While jotting down the little annoyances of the moment in my journal, and then transferring them here (when they were expressed decently), it’s possible that I may have said things that someone deeply observing national character might hesitate to agree with, but I truly believe they all contained more or less truth. If they are true, there’s no reason they shouldn’t be said. Not one Englishman ever spared America for the sake of politeness or kindness; nor, in my opinion, would it help our mutual benefit and comfort if we covered each other in flattery. In any case, we shouldn't judge an Englishman’s sensitivities by our own, which I hope are far less delicate than they used to be.

And now farewell, my dear friend; and excuse (if you think it needs any excuse) the freedom with which I thus publicly assert a personal friendship between a private individual and a statesman who has filled what was then the most august position in the world. But I dedicate my book to the Friend, and shall defer a colloquy with the Statesman till some calmer and sunnier hour. Only this let me say, that, with the record of your life in my memory, and with a sense of your character in my deeper consciousness as among the few things that time has left as it found them, I need no assurance that you continue faithful forever to that grand idea of an irrevocable Union, which, as you once told me, was the earliest that your brave father taught you. For other men there may be a choice of paths,—for you, but one; and it rests among my certainties that no man's loyalty is more steadfast, no man's hopes or apprehensions on behalf of our national existence more deeply heartfelt, or more closely intertwined with his possibilities of personal happiness, than those of FRANKLIN PIERCE.

And now, goodbye, my dear friend; please forgive me (if you think an apology is necessary) for openly declaring a personal friendship between a private person and a statesman who held what was then the highest position in the world. But I dedicate my book to the Friend, and I will hold off on a discussion with the Statesman until a calmer, brighter time. Just let me say that, with the memories of your life in my mind, and with a strong understanding of your character as one of the few things time has left unchanged, I need no confirmation that you remain forever committed to that great idea of an unbreakable Union, which, as you once shared with me, was the first lesson your brave father taught you. For others, there may be a choice of paths—but for you, only one. I am certain that no one’s loyalty is more unwavering, and no one’s hopes or concerns for our national existence run deeper or are more closely linked to their chances of personal happiness than those of FRANKLIN PIERCE.

THE WAYSIDE, July 2, 1863.

THE WAYSIDE, July 2, 1863.










Contents





OUR OLD HOME.





CONSULAR EXPERIENCES.

The Consulate of the United States, in my day, was located in Washington Buildings (a shabby and smoke-stained edifice of four stories high, thus illustriously named in honor of our national establishment), at the lower corner of Brunswick Street, contiguous to the Gorec Arcade, and in the neighborhood of scone of the oldest docks. This was by no means a polite or elegant portion of England's great commercial city, nor were the apartments of the American official so splendid as to indicate the assumption of much consular pomp on his part. A narrow and ill-lighted staircase gave access to an equally narrow and ill-lighted passageway on the first floor, at the extremity of which, surmounting a door-frame, appeared an exceedingly stiff pictorial representation of the Goose and Gridiron, according to the English idea of those ever-to-be-honored symbols. The staircase and passageway were often thronged, of a morning, with a set of beggarly and piratical-looking scoundrels (I do no wrong to our own countrymen in styling them so, for not one in twenty was a genuine American), purporting to belong to our mercantile marine, and chiefly composed of Liverpool Blackballers and the scum of every maritime nation on earth; such being the seamen by whose assistance we then disputed the navigation of the world with England. These specimens of a most unfortunate class of people were shipwrecked crews in quest of bed, board, and clothing, invalids asking permits for the hospital, bruised and bloody wretches complaining of ill-treatment by their officers, drunkards, desperadoes, vagabonds, and cheats, perplexingly intermingled with an uncertain proportion of reasonably honest men. All of them (save here and there a poor devil of a kidnapped landsman in his shore-going rags) wore red flannel shirts, in which they had sweltered or shivered throughout the voyage, and all required consular assistance in one form or another.

The Consulate of the United States, back in my day, was situated in Washington Buildings (a rundown and smoke-stained four-story building, named in honor of our national establishment), at the lower corner of Brunswick Street, next to the Gorec Arcade, and near some of the oldest docks. This was definitely not a nice or elegant part of England's major commercial city, nor were the American official's accommodations impressive enough to suggest any kind of consular grandeur on his part. A narrow, poorly lit staircase led to an equally narrow and dimly lit hallway on the first floor, at the end of which, above a doorframe, hung a very stiff depiction of the Goose and Gridiron, in line with the English interpretation of those ever-respected symbols. The staircase and hallway were often crowded in the mornings with a bunch of raggedy and pirate-like scoundrels (I don’t mean to offend my fellow countrymen by calling them that, as not one in twenty was a true American), pretending to be part of our merchant marine, mainly made up of Liverpool Blackballers and the dregs of every maritime nation on the planet; these were the sailors through whom we were then competing with England for control of the seas. This unfortunate group consisted of shipwrecked crews seeking shelter, food, and clothing, sick individuals requesting hospital permits, injured and battered souls complaining of mistreatment by their officers, drunkards, outlaws, drifters, and con artists, confusingly mixed with a fair number of reasonably honest men. Every one of them (except for an occasional poor soul who had been kidnapped and wore tattered shore-going clothes) donned red flannel shirts, which they had either sweated through or shivered in during their voyages, and all required consular assistance in some way or another.

Any respectable visitor, if he could make up his mind to elbow a passage among these sea-monsters, was admitted into an outer office, where he found more of the same species, explaining their respective wants or grievances to the Vice-Consul and clerks, while their shipmates awaited their turn outside the door. Passing through this exterior court, the stranger was ushered into an inner privacy, where sat the Consul himself, ready to give personal attention to such peculiarly difficult and more important cases as might demand the exercise of (what we will courteously suppose to be) his own higher judicial or administrative sagacity.

Any respectable visitor, if he managed to navigate through the crowd of sea-monsters, was welcomed into an outer office, where he found more people like him explaining their needs or complaints to the Vice-Consul and his staff, while their shipmates waited outside the door. After passing through this waiting area, the visitor was taken into a private room, where the Consul himself sat, ready to personally address those particularly challenging and important cases that required (what we will politely assume to be) his own superior judgment or administrative insight.

It was an apartment of very moderate size, painted in imitation of oak, and duskily lighted by two windows looking across a by-street at the rough brick-side of an immense cotton warehouse, a plainer and uglier structure than ever was built in America. On the walls of the room hung a large map of the United States (as they were, twenty years ago, but seem little likely to be, twenty years hence), and a similar one of Great Britain, with its territory so provokingly compact, that we may expect it to sink sooner than sunder. Farther adornments were some rude engravings of our naval victories in the War of 1812, together with the Tennessee State House, and a Hudson River steamer, and a colored, life-size lithograph of General Taylor, with an honest hideousness of aspect, occupying the place of honor above the mantel-piece. On the top of a bookcase stood a fierce and terrible bust of General Jackson, pilloried in a military collar which rose above his ears, and frowning forth immitigably at any Englishman who might happen to cross the threshold. I am afraid, however, that the truculence of the old General's expression was utterly thrown away on this stolid and obdurate race of men; for, when they occasionally inquired whom this work of art represented, I was mortified to find that the younger ones had never heard of the battle of New Orleans, and that their elders had either forgotten it altogether, or contrived to misremember, and twist it wrong end foremost into something like an English victory. They have caught from the old Romans (whom they resemble in so many other characteristics) this excellent method of keeping the national glory intact by sweeping all defeats and humiliations clean out of their memory. Nevertheless, my patriotism forbade me to take down either the bust, or the pictures, both because it seemed no more than right that an American Consulate (being a little patch of our nationality imbedded into the soil and institutions of England) should fairly represent the American taste in the fine arts, and because these decorations reminded me so delightfully of an old-fashioned American barber's shop.

It was a small apartment, painted to look like oak, and dimly lit by two windows facing a side street, looking at the rough brick wall of a massive cotton warehouse, a plainer and uglier building than anything ever constructed in America. On the walls of the room was a large map of the United States (as they were twenty years ago, but seem unlikely to be in twenty years), and a similar map of Great Britain, its territory so annoyingly compact that we might expect it to sink before it separates. Other decorations included some crude engravings of our naval victories in the War of 1812, the Tennessee State House, a Hudson River steamer, and a colored, life-size lithograph of General Taylor, whose honest but ugly face took the place of honor above the mantelpiece. On top of a bookcase stood a fierce and intimidating bust of General Jackson, in a military collar that rose above his ears, glaring fiercely at any Englishman who might happen to enter. However, I was disappointed to find that the aggressive expression of the old General meant nothing to these stolid and stubborn men; when they occasionally asked who this artwork represented, I was disheartened to discover that the younger ones had never heard of the Battle of New Orleans, and their elders had either completely forgotten it or managed to misremember it as some sort of English victory. They've adopted from the old Romans (who they resemble in many other ways) this smart tactic of keeping national glory intact by completely erasing all defeats and humiliations from their memory. Nevertheless, my patriotism prevented me from removing either the bust or the pictures, both because it felt only right that an American Consulate (a small piece of our nationality embedded in the soil and institutions of England) should fairly represent American taste in the fine arts, and because these decorations reminded me so charmingly of an old-fashioned American barber shop.

One truly English object was a barometer hanging on the wall, generally indicating one or another degree of disagreeable weather, and so seldom pointing to Fair, that I began to consider that portion of its circle as made superfluously. The deep chimney, with its grate of bituminous coal, was English too, as was also the chill temperature that sometimes called for a fire at midsummer, and the foggy or smoky atmosphere which often, between November and March, compelled me to set the gas aflame at noonday. I am not aware of omitting anything important in the above descriptive inventory, unless it be some book-shelves filled with octavo volumes of the American Statutes, and a good many pigeon-holes stuffed with dusty communications from former Secretaries of State, and other official documents of similar value, constituting part of the archives of the Consulate, which I might have done my successor a favor by flinging into the coal-grate. Yes; there was one other article demanding prominent notice: the consular copy of the New Testament, bound in black morocco, and greasy, I fear, with a daily succession of perjured kisses; at least, I can hardly hope that all the ten thousand oaths, administered by me between two breaths, to all sorts of people and on all manner of worldly business, were reckoned by the swearer as if taken at his soul's peril.

One truly English item was a barometer hanging on the wall, usually showing some degree of unpleasant weather, and so rarely pointing to Fair that I began to think that part of its circle was unnecessary. The deep chimney, with its grate of soft coal, was English too, just like the chill temperature that sometimes required a fire even in midsummer, and the foggy or smoky air that often made me turn on the gas at noon between November and March. I don’t think I’ve left out anything significant in this description, except maybe some bookshelves filled with octavo volumes of American Statutes, and plenty of pigeonholes crammed with dusty letters from former Secretaries of State and other official documents of similar importance, which I might have done my successor a favor by tossing into the coal grate. Yes; there was one other thing worth mentioning: the consular copy of the New Testament, bound in black leather, and unfortunately greasy from a daily onslaught of false oaths; at least, I can hardly believe that all ten thousand oaths I administered, between two breaths, to all sorts of people and on all kinds of worldly matters, were seen by the swearer as if they were made at the risk of their soul.

Such, in short, was the dusky and stifled chamber in which I spent wearily a considerable portion of more than four good years of my existence. At first, to be quite frank with the reader, I looked upon it as not altogether fit to be tenanted by the commercial representative of so great and prosperous a country as the United States then were; and I should speedily have transferred my headquarters to airier and loftier apartments, except for the prudent consideration that my government would have left me thus to support its dignity at my own personal expense. Besides, a long line of distinguished predecessors, of whom the latest is now a gallant general under the Union banner, had found the locality good enough for them; it might certainly be tolerated, therefore, by an individual so little ambitious of external magnificence as myself. So I settled quietly down, striking some of my roots into such soil as I could find, adapting myself to circumstances, and with so much success, that, though from first to last I hated the very sight of the little room, I should yet have felt a singular kind of reluctance in changing it for a better.

The dim and stuffy room where I spent a significant part of over four long years of my life was, to be honest, not really fit for someone representing such a great and prosperous country as the United States was back then. I would have quickly moved my office to a brighter and more spacious place, but I realized my government would have left me to manage its reputation on my own dime. Plus, a long line of respected predecessors, the latest of whom is now a brave general fighting for the Union, had found this place suitable for them; I figured it could be tolerated by someone like me, who wasn’t particularly keen on flashy surroundings. So I settled in, put down some roots in whatever space I could find, adjusted to my situation, and surprisingly, even though I despised the sight of that little room from beginning to end, I would have felt a strange sort of hesitation in swapping it for something better.

Hither, in the course of my incumbency, came a great variety of visitors, principally Americans, but including almost every other nationality on earth, especially the distressed and downfallen ones like those of Poland and Hungary. Italian bandits (for so they looked), proscribed conspirators from Old Spain, Spanish-Americans, Cubans who processed to have stood by Lopez and narrowly escaped his fate, scarred French soldiers of the Second Republic,—in a word, all sufferers, or pretended ones, in the cause of Liberty, all people homeless in the widest sense, those who never had a country or had lost it, those whom their native land had impatiently flung off for planning a better system of things than they were born to,—a multitude of these and, doubtless, an equal number of jail-birds, outwardly of the same feather, sought the American Consulate, in hopes of at least a bit of bread, and, perhaps, to beg a passage to the blessed shores of Freedom. In most cases there was nothing, and in any case distressingly little, to be done for them; neither was I of a proselyting disposition, nor desired to make my Consulate a nucleus for the vagrant discontents of other lands. And yet it was a proud thought, a forcible appeal to the sympathies of an American, that these unfortunates claimed the privileges of citizenship in our Republic on the strength of the very same noble misdemeanors that had rendered them outlaws to their native despotisms. So I gave them what small help I could. Methinks the true patriots and martyr-spirits of the whole world should have been conscious of a pang near the heart, when a deadly blow was aimed at the vitality of a country which they have felt to be their own in the last resort.

During my time here, a wide range of visitors came, mainly Americans, but almost every nationality on earth, especially those who were struggling and suffering like the people from Poland and Hungary. There were Italian bandits (or at least they looked like that), exiled conspirators from Old Spain, Spanish-Americans, Cubans who claimed to have supported Lopez and barely escaped his fate, and battle-scarred French soldiers from the Second Republic. In short, all kinds of people suffering, or pretending to suffer, for the cause of Liberty—those who were homeless in every sense, those who had never had a country or had lost it, and those whom their homeland had impatiently rejected for trying to create a better world than the one they were born into. A crowd of them, along with surely an equal number of ex-convicts who looked similar, sought help at the American Consulate, hoping for at least a bit of bread and maybe to ask for a passage to the promised land of Freedom. In most cases, there was nothing, and at best, very little, to be done for them; I wasn’t inclined to convert anyone or to turn my Consulate into a gathering place for discontented people from other countries. Yet, it was a proud thought and a strong appeal to American sympathies that these unfortunate souls claimed the rights of citizenship in our Republic based on the very same noble actions that had made them outlaws in their own oppressive countries. So, I offered them whatever small assistance I could. I think the true patriots and martyrs of the world must have felt a pang in their hearts when a serious threat was aimed at the vitality of a country they considered their own in the end.

As for my countrymen, I grew better acquainted with many of our national characteristics during those four years than in all my preceding life. Whether brought more strikingly out by the contrast with English manners, or that my Yankee friends assumed an extra peculiarity from a sense of defiant patriotism, so it was that their tones, sentiments, and behavior, even their figures and cast of countenance, all seemed chiselled in sharper angles than ever I had imagined them to be at home. It impressed me with an odd idea of having somehow lost the property of my own person, when I occasionally heard one of them speaking of me as "my Consul"! They often came to the Consulate in parties of half a dozen or more, on no business whatever, but merely to subject their public servant to a rigid examination, and see how he was getting on with his duties. These interviews were rather formidable, being characterized by a certain stiffness which I felt to be sufficiently irksome at the moment, though it looks laughable enough in the retrospect. It is my firm belief that these fellow-citizens, possessing a native tendency to organization, generally halted outside of the door to elect a speaker, chairman, or moderator, and thus approached me with all the formalities of a deputation from the American people. After salutations on both sides,— abrupt, awful, and severe on their part, and deprecatory on mine,—and the national ceremony of shaking hands being duly gone through with, the interview proceeded by a series of calm and well-considered questions or remarks from the spokesman (no other of the guests vouchsafing to utter a word), and diplomatic responses from the Consul, who sometimes found the investigation a little more searching than he liked. I flatter myself, however, that, by much practice, I attained considerable skill in this kind of intercourse, the art of which lies in passing off commonplaces for new and valuable truths, and talking trash and emptiness in such a way that a pretty acute auditor might mistake it for something solid. If there be any better method of dealing with such junctures,—when talk is to be created out of nothing, and within the scope of several minds at once, so that you cannot apply yourself to your interlocutor's individuality,—I have not learned it.

As for my fellow countrymen, I got to know many of our national traits during those four years better than in all my previous life. Whether it was because they stood out more against English customs, or because my American friends showed an extra flair out of a sense of patriotic pride, their voices, attitudes, and behaviors— even their appearances and facial expressions— all seemed more sharply defined than I had ever imagined back home. It left me with a strange feeling that I had somehow lost my own identity when I occasionally heard one of them refer to me as "my Consul"! They often came to the Consulate in groups of six or more, not for any official reason, but just to put their public servant under scrutiny and see how I was managing my duties. These visits were quite intimidating, marked by a certain stiffness that I found annoying at the time, although it seems pretty amusing in hindsight. I firmly believe these fellow citizens, who naturally gravitated towards organization, usually paused outside the door to choose a speaker, chairperson, or moderator, and then approached me with all the formalities of a delegation from the American people. After greetings on both sides— abrupt, intense, and serious from them, and deferential from me— and with the national ritual of shaking hands duly completed, the meeting proceeded with a series of calm and thoughtful questions or remarks from the spokesperson (none of the other guests daring to say a word), and diplomatic replies from the Consul, who sometimes found the inquiries a bit more probing than he preferred. However, I like to think that through practice, I became quite skilled at this type of interaction, which involves passing off clichés as new and valuable insights, and discussing trivial topics in such a way that a perceptive listener might mistake them for something substantial. If there’s a better way to handle situations like these— where conversation needs to be generated from nothing and involves several minds at once, preventing you from focusing solely on your conversation partner’s individuality— I haven't learned it.

Sitting, as it were, in the gateway between the Old World and the New, where the steamers and packets landed the greater part of our wandering countrymen, and received them again when their wanderings were done, I saw that no people on earth have such vagabond habits as ourselves. The Continental races never travel at all if they can help it; nor does an Englishman ever think of stirring abroad, unless he has the money to spare, or proposes to himself some definite advantage from the journey; but it seemed to me that nothing was more common than for a young American deliberately to spend all his resources in an aesthetic peregrination about Europe, returning with pockets nearly empty to begin the world in earnest. It happened, indeed, much oftener than was at all agreeable to myself, that their funds held out just long enough to bring them to the door of my Consulate, where they entered as if with an undeniable right to its shelter and protection, and required at my hands to be sent home again. In my first simplicity,—finding them gentlemanly in manners, passably educated, and only tempted a little beyond their means by a laudable desire of improving and refining themselves, or, perhaps for the sake of getting better artistic instruction in music, painting, or sculpture than our country could supply,—I sometimes took charge of them on my private responsibility, since our government gives itself no trouble about its stray children, except the seafaring class. But, after a few such experiments, discovering that none of these estimable and ingenuous young men, however trustworthy they might appear, ever dreamed of reimbursing the Consul, I deemed it expedient to take another course with them. Applying myself to some friendly shipmaster, I engaged homeward passages on their behalf, with the understanding that they were to make themselves serviceable on shipboard; and I remember several very pathetic appeals from painters and musicians, touching the damage which their artistic fingers were likely to incur from handling the ropes. But my observation of so many heavier troubles left me very little tenderness for their finger-ends. In time I grew to be reasonably hard-hearted, though it never was quite possible to leave a countryman with no shelter save an English poorhouse, when, as he invariably averred, he had only to set foot on his native soil to be possessed of ample funds. It was my ultimate conclusion, however, that American ingenuity may be pretty safely left to itself, and that, one way or another, a Yankee vagabond is certain to turn up at his own threshold, if he has any, without help of a Consul, and perhaps be taught a lesson of foresight that may profit him hereafter.

Sitting at the crossroads between the Old World and the New, where the ships and boats brought many of our wandering countrymen, and welcomed them back when their journeys ended, I noticed that no one on earth has such wandering habits as we do. The people in Europe hardly travel at all if they can avoid it; an Englishman won't think about going abroad unless he has extra money to spend or is expecting some clear benefits from the trip. But it seemed to me that it was quite common for a young American to use up all his resources on a cultural journey through Europe, returning home nearly broke to start fresh. Often enough, much to my annoyance, their money lasted just long enough to bring them to the door of my Consulate, where they came in as if they had a right to its shelter and protection, asking me to send them back home. Initially, I thought they were polite, reasonably educated, and only slightly overextending themselves due to a commendable desire to improve and refine themselves, maybe even to seek better artistic training in music, painting, or sculpture than our country could provide. So, I sometimes took responsibility for them personally, since our government doesn’t really help its wandering citizens, except for those at sea. But after a few such experiences, realizing that none of these respectable and naive young men, no matter how trustworthy they seemed, ever thought about paying back the Consul, I decided it was better to handle things differently with them. I reached out to some friendly ship captain and arranged for them to get homeward tickets, under the condition they would help out on the ship. I recall several very emotional pleas from painters and musicians about the damage their artistic hands might suffer from handling the ropes. However, seeing so many bigger problems left me with little sympathy for their fingers. Over time, I became somewhat hard-hearted, although it was never easy to leave a countryman without shelter except in an English poorhouse, especially when he always insisted that he just needed to set foot on his home soil to be rich. Ultimately, I concluded that American resourcefulness can generally take care of itself, and that a Yankee drifter is bound to find his way back home—if he has one—without a Consul's help, and might even learn a lesson in foresight that will benefit him later.

Among these stray Americans, I met with no other case so remarkable as that of an old man, who was in the habit of visiting me once in a few months, and soberly affirmed that he had been wandering about England more than a quarter of a century (precisely twenty-seven years, I think), and all the while doing his utmost to get home again. Herman Melville, in his excellent novel or biography of "Israel Potter," has an idea somewhat similar to this. The individual now in question was a mild and patient, but very ragged and pitiable old fellow, shabby beyond description, lean and hungry-looking, but with a large and somewhat red nose. He made no complaint of his ill-fortune, but only repeated in a quiet voice, with a pathos of which he was himself evidently unconscious, "I want to get home to Ninety-second Street, Philadelphia." He described himself as a printer by trade, and said that he had come over when he was a younger man, in the hope of bettering himself, and for the sake of seeing the Old Country, but had never since been rich enough to pay his homeward passage. His manner and accent did not quite convince me that he was an American, and I told him so; but he steadfastly affirmed, "Sir, I was born and have lived in Ninety-second Street, Philadelphia," and then went on to describe some public edifices and other local objects with which he used to be familiar, adding, with a simplicity that touched me very closely, "Sir, I had rather be there than here!" Though I still manifested a lingering doubt, he took no offence, replying with the same mild depression as at first, and insisting again and again on Ninety-second Street. Up to the time when I saw him, he still got a little occasional job-work at his trade, but subsisted mainly on such charity as he met with in his wanderings, shifting from place to place continually, and asking assistance to convey him to his native land. Possibly he was an impostor, one of the multitudinous shapes of English vagabondism, and told his falsehood with such powerful simplicity, because, by many repetitions, he had convinced himself of its truth. But if, as I believe, the tale was fact, how very strange and sad was this old man's fate! Homeless on a foreign shore, looking always towards his country, coming again and again to the point whence so many were setting sail for it,—so many who would soon tread in Ninety-second Street,— losing, in this long series of years, some of the distinctive characteristics of an American, and at last dying and surrendering his clay to be a portion of the soil whence he could not escape in his lifetime.

Among these wandering Americans, I encountered no other story as remarkable as that of an old man who would visit me every few months. He solemnly claimed he had been wandering around England for over twenty-five years (exactly twenty-seven years, I believe) and had been trying his hardest to return home all that time. Herman Melville, in his great novel or biography titled "Israel Potter," has a somewhat similar idea. This individual was a mild and patient, yet very ragged and pitiful old guy, shabby beyond description, lean and looking hungry, but with a large, somewhat red nose. He didn't complain about his misfortune; instead, he quietly repeated, with a sadness he seemed unaware of, "I want to get home to Ninety-second Street, Philadelphia." He described himself as a printer by trade and mentioned that he had come over as a younger man, hoping to improve his life and see the Old Country, but had never been rich enough to afford the return trip. His manner and accent didn't completely convince me he was American, and I told him so; however, he firmly insisted, "Sir, I was born and have lived in Ninety-second Street, Philadelphia," and then went on to describe some public buildings and local sights he used to know, adding, with a simplicity that deeply touched me, "Sir, I’d rather be there than here!" Though I still had some lingering doubt, he took no offense and replied with the same gentle sadness as before, repeating again and again his longing for Ninety-second Street. Up until the time I met him, he managed to find occasional work in his trade but mostly lived off the charity he encountered in his travels, constantly moving from place to place and asking for help to get back to his homeland. He might have been a fraud, one of the many forms of English vagrancy, telling his lies with such genuine simplicity because he had convinced himself of them through repetition. But if, as I believe, his story was true, how very strange and sad was this old man’s fate! Homeless on foreign soil, always looking toward his country, returning again and again to the point from which so many were sailing back home—so many who would soon walk down Ninety-second Street—losing, over these long years, some of the distinct traits of an American, and ultimately dying, leaving behind his body to become part of the soil from which he couldn’t escape in life.

He appeared to see that he had moved me, but did not attempt to press his advantage with any new argument, or any varied form of entreaty. He had but scanty and scattered thoughts in his gray head, and in the intervals of those, like the refrain of an old ballad, came in the monotonous burden of his appeal, "If I could only find myself in Ninety-second Street, Philadelphia!" But even his desire of getting home had ceased to be an ardent one (if, indeed, it had not always partaken of the dreamy sluggishness of his character), although it remained his only locomotive impulse, and perhaps the sole principle of life that kept his blood from actual torpor.

He seemed to realize that he had affected me, but he didn't try to capitalize on it with any new arguments or different ways of pleading. His mind was filled with scattered and vague thoughts, and amidst those, like the repetitive chorus of an old song, came his ongoing plea, "If I could just find my way to Ninety-second Street, Philadelphia!" Yet even his longing to get home had lost its intensity (if it ever had a vibrant quality, considering his generally sluggish nature), though it was still the only thing pushing him forward, possibly the only driving force that kept him from completely stagnating.

The poor old fellow's story seemed to me almost as worthy of being chanted in immortal song as that of Odysseus or Evangeline. I took his case into deep consideration, but dared not incur the moral responsibility of sending him across the sea, at his age, after so many years of exile, when the very tradition of him had passed away, to find his friends dead, or forgetful, or irretrievably vanished, and the whole country become more truly a foreign land to him than England was now,— and even Ninety-second Street, in the weedlike decay and growth of our localities, made over anew and grown unrecognizable by his old eyes. That street, so patiently longed for, had transferred itself to the New Jerusalem, and he must seek it there, contenting his slow heart, meanwhile, with the smoke-begrimed thoroughfares of English towns, or the green country lanes and by-paths with which his wanderings had made him familiar; for doubtless he had a beaten track and was the "long-remembered beggar" now, with food and a roughly hospitable greeting ready for him at many a farm-house door, and his choice of lodging under a score of haystacks. In America, nothing awaited him but that worst form of disappointment which comes under the guise of a long-cherished and late-accomplished purpose, and then a year or two of dry and barren sojourn in an almshouse, and death among strangers at last, where he had imagined a circle of familiar faces. So I contented myself with giving him alms, which he thankfully accepted, and went away with bent shoulders and an aspect of gentle forlornness; returning upon his orbit, however, after a few months, to tell the same sad and quiet story of his abode in England for more than twenty-seven years, in all which time he had been endeavoring, and still endeavored as patiently as ever, to find his way home to Ninety-second Street, Philadelphia.

The story of the poor old man struck me as almost as worthy of being celebrated in an eternal song as that of Odysseus or Evangeline. I considered his situation deeply but didn’t feel right about sending him across the sea at his age, after so many years away, when the very tradition of him had faded. He would likely find his friends dead, forgetful, or completely gone, and the whole country would feel less like home than England does now. Even Ninety-second Street, with the weeds sprouting and changing our neighborhoods, had transformed so much that it would be unrecognizable to his old eyes. That street, which he had longed for so patiently, had shifted to the New Jerusalem, and he would have to look for it there, meanwhile trying to soothe his aching heart with the smoke-stained streets of English towns or the green country lanes and paths he had come to know. Surely, he had a familiar route and was now the “long-remembered beggar,” with food and a somewhat warm welcome waiting for him at many farmhouses, and plenty of haystacks to choose from for shelter. In America, though, nothing awaited him except the deepest disappointment disguised as a long-held and recently fulfilled dream, followed by a couple of years of dull existence in an almshouse, and death among strangers where he had hoped to see familiar faces. So, I settled for giving him some money, which he gratefully accepted, and he left with slumped shoulders and a gentle look of sadness. However, he returned to me after a few months to share the same sorrowful and quiet story of his life in England for over twenty-seven years, during which time he had been trying, and still was trying just as patiently, to find his way back home to Ninety-second Street, Philadelphia.

I recollect another case, of a more ridiculous order, but still with a foolish kind of pathos entangled in it, which impresses me now more forcibly than it did at the moment. One day, a queer, stupid, good-natured, fat-faced individual came into my private room, dressed in a sky-blue, cut-away coat and mixed trousers, both garments worn and shabby, and rather too small for his overgrown bulk. After a little preliminary talk, he turned out to be a country shopkeeper (from Connecticut, I think), who had left a flourishing business, and come over to England purposely and solely to have an interview with the Queen. Some years before he had named his two children, one for her Majesty and the other for Prince Albert, and had transmitted photographs of the little people, as well as of his wife and himself, to the illustrious godmother. The Queen had gratefully acknowledged the favor in a letter under the hand of her private secretary. Now, the shopkeeper, like a great many other Americans, had long cherished a fantastic notion that he was one of the rightful heirs of a rich English estate; and on the strength of her Majesty's letter and the hopes of royal patronage which it inspired, he had shut up his little country-store and come over to claim his inheritance. On the voyage, a German fellow-passenger had relieved him of his money on pretence of getting it favorably exchanged, and had disappeared immediately on the ship's arrival; so that the poor fellow was compelled to pawn all his clothes, except the remarkably shabby ones in which I beheld him, and in which (as he himself hinted, with a melancholy, yet good-natured smile) he did not look altogether fit to see the Queen. I agreed with him that the bobtailed coat and mixed trousers constituted a very odd-looking court-dress, and suggested that it was doubtless his present purpose to get back to Connecticut as fast as possible. But no! The resolve to see the Queen was as strong in him as ever; and it was marvellous the pertinacity with which he clung to it amid raggedness and starvation, and the earnestness of his supplication that I would supply him with funds for a suitable appearance at Windsor Castle.

I remember another case, which was more ridiculous but still had a silly kind of sadness to it that sticks with me more than it did at the time. One day, a strange, simple, good-natured, chubby guy walked into my private room, wearing a sky-blue cutaway coat and mismatched trousers, both old and worn out, and a bit too small for his large frame. After some small talk, he revealed that he was a country shopkeeper (from Connecticut, I think), who had left a successful business and traveled to England specifically to meet the Queen. Years earlier, he had named his two children after her and Prince Albert, and had sent pictures of his kids, wife, and himself to their royal godmother. The Queen had kindly acknowledged this with a letter from her private secretary. Now, like many other Americans, the shopkeeper had long held onto a bizarre belief that he was a rightful heir to a wealthy English estate. Buoyed by the Queen’s letter and the hope of royal favor, he had closed his little country store and traveled to claim his inheritance. On the voyage, a German passenger tricked him into giving up his money under the pretense of exchanging it favorably and vanished as soon as the ship docked. This left him needing to pawn all his clothes, except for the particularly shabby ones he was wearing when I saw him. He suggested, with a sad yet friendly smile, that he didn’t look quite presentable enough to see the Queen. I agreed that the mismatched coat and trousers were indeed a very odd choice for court dress and suggested he should probably head back to Connecticut as quickly as possible. But no! His determination to meet the Queen was as strong as ever; it was amazing how he clung to that dream despite his ragged appearance and lack of money, and how earnestly he asked me for funds to help him make a proper impression at Windsor Castle.

I never had so satisfactory a perception of a complete booby before in my life; and it caused me to feel kindly towards him, and yet impatient and exasperated on behalf of common-sense, which could not possibly tolerate that such an unimaginable donkey should exist. I laid his absurdity before him in the very plainest terms, but without either exciting his anger or shaking his resolution. "O my dear man," quoth he, with good-natured, placid, simple, and tearful stubbornness, "if you could but enter into my feelings and see the matter from beginning to end as I see it!" To confess the truth, I have since felt that I was hard-hearted to the poor simpleton, and that there was more weight in his remonstrance than I chose to be sensible of, at the time; for, like many men who have been in the habit of making playthings or tools of their imagination and sensibility, I was too rigidly tenacious of what was reasonable in the affairs of real life. And even absurdity has its rights, when, as in this case, it has absorbed a human being's entire nature and purposes. I ought to have transmitted him to Mr. Buchanan, in London, who, being a good-natured old gentleman, and anxious, just then, to gratify the universal Yankee nation, might, for the joke's sake, have got him admittance to the Queen, who had fairly laid herself open to his visit, and has received hundreds of our countrymen on infinitely slighter grounds. But I was inexorable, being turned to flint by the insufferable proximity of a fool, and refused to interfere with his business in any way except to procure him a passage home. I can see his face of mild, ridiculous despair, at this moment, and appreciate, better than I could then, how awfully cruel he must have felt my obduracy to be. For years and years, the idea of an interview with Queen Victoria had haunted his poor foolish mind; and now, when he really stood on English ground, and the palace-door was hanging ajar for him, he was expected to turn brick, a penniless and bamboozled simpleton, merely because an iron-hearted consul refused to lend him thirty shillings (so low had his demand ultimately sunk) to buy a second-class ticket on the rail for London!

I’ve never encountered such a complete fool in my life; it made me feel a mix of kindness towards him, and yet impatience and frustration on behalf of common sense, which couldn’t possibly accept that such an unimaginable idiot could exist. I laid out his absurdity in the simplest terms, but I didn’t provoke his anger or shake his resolution. “Oh my dear man,” he said, with good-natured, calm, simple, and tearfully stubborn determination, “if you could only understand my feelings and see the situation from start to finish as I do!” Honestly, I’ve since realized that I was heartless to this poor simpleton, and that there was more truth in his protest than I was willing to acknowledge at the time; for, like many who toy with their imagination and emotions, I was too stubbornly attached to what seemed reasonable in the real world. And even absurdity has its rights, especially when it has completely taken over a person’s entire nature and purpose. I should have referred him to Mr. Buchanan in London, who, being a good-natured old gentleman and eager to please the Yankee nation, might have, for the sake of humor, arranged for him to meet the Queen, who had opened herself up to his visit and has welcomed countless Americans under far less compelling circumstances. But I was unyielding, hardened by the unbearable presence of a fool, and refused to involve myself in his affairs except to help him get a ride back home. I can vividly recall his face of mild, ridiculous despair, and I understand better now than I did then, just how cruel my stubbornness must have seemed to him. For years, the thought of meeting Queen Victoria had consumed his foolish mind; and now, when he finally stood on English soil, with the palace door slightly open for him, he was expected to act as if nothing mattered, a broke and duped simpleton, just because a hard-hearted consul refused to give him thirty shillings (the extent of his final request) to buy a second-class train ticket to London!

He visited the Consulate several times afterwards, subsisting on a pittance that I allowed him in the hope of gradually starving him back to Connecticut, assailing me with the old petition at every opportunity, looking shabbier at every visit, but still thoroughly good-tempered, mildly stubborn, and smiling through his tears, not without a perception of the ludicrousness of his own position. Finally, he disappeared altogether, and whither he had wandered, and whether he ever saw the Queen, or wasted quite away in the endeavor, I never knew; but I remember unfolding the "Times," about that period, with a daily dread of reading an account of a ragged Yankee's attempt to steal into Buckingham Palace, and how he smiled tearfully at his captors and besought them to introduce him to her Majesty. I submit to Mr. Secretary Seward that he ought to make diplomatic remonstrances to the British Ministry, and require them to take such order that the Queen shall not any longer bewilder the wits of our poor compatriots by responding to their epistles and thanking them for their photographs.

He went to the Consulate several times afterward, living on the small amount of money I gave him, hoping to slowly starve him back to Connecticut. He bombarded me with the same old request every chance he got, looking more worn out with each visit, but still cheerful, somewhat stubborn, and smiling through his tears, fully aware of the absurdity of his situation. Eventually, he vanished completely, and I never found out where he went or if he ever met the Queen, or if he just faded away trying. But I remember unfolding the "Times" around that time, dreading the daily news of a ragged American trying to sneak into Buckingham Palace and smiling tearfully at his captors, asking them to introduce him to Her Majesty. I suggest to Mr. Secretary Seward that he should make diplomatic complaints to the British government, urging them to take action so that the Queen will stop confusing our poor countrymen by replying to their letters and thanking them for their photographs.

One circumstance in the foregoing incident—I mean the unhappy storekeeper's notion of establishing his claim to an English estate—was common to a great many other applications, personal or by letter, with which I was favored by my countrymen. The cause of this peculiar insanity lies deep in the Anglo-American heart. After all these bloody wars and vindictive animosities, we have still an unspeakable yearning towards England. When our forefathers left the old home, they pulled up many of their roots, but trailed along with them others, which were never snapt asunder by the tug of such a lengthening distance, nor have been torn out of the original soil by the violence of subsequent struggles, nor severed by the edge of the sword. Even so late as these days, they remain entangled with our heart-strings, and might often have influenced our national cause like the tiller-ropes of a ship, if the rough gripe of England had been capable of managing so sensitive a kind of machinery. It has required nothing less than the boorishness, the stolidity, the self-sufficiency, the contemptuous jealousy, the half-sagacity, invariably blind of one eye and often distorted of the other, that characterize this strange people, to compel us to be a great nation in our own right, instead of continuing virtually, if not in name, a province of their small island. What pains did they take to shake us off, and have ever since taken to keep us wide apart from them! It might seem their folly, but was really their fate, or, rather, the Providence of God, who has doubtless a work for us to do, in which the massive materiality of the English character would have been too ponderous a dead-weight upon our progress. And, besides, if England had been wise enough to twine our new vigor round about her ancient strength, her power would have been too firmly established ever to yield, in its due season, to the otherwise immutable law of imperial vicissitude. The earth might then have beheld the intolerable spectacle of a sovereignty and institutions, imperfect, but indestructible.

One aspect of the situation I just described—the unfortunate storekeeper's belief that he could claim an English estate—was something a lot of other people expressed, whether in person or through letters, when they reached out to me. This strange mindset runs deep in the hearts of Anglo-Americans. Despite all the bloody wars and fierce resentments, we still have an undeniable longing for England. When our ancestors left the old country, they uprooted many of their connections, but they also took some with them that distance and later conflicts never fully severed. Even today, these ties remain intertwined with our emotions and could have significantly influenced our national identity, like the ropes steering a ship, if England had been capable of managing such delicate matters. It took the crudeness, rigidity, self-reliance, jealousy, and the often narrow-mindedness of this peculiar people to push us to stand as a strong nation on our own instead of merely being a province of their small island. They worked hard to shake us off and have tried ever since to keep us apart from them! It might seem like their mistake, but it was really their destiny—or, rather, the will of God, who clearly has a purpose for us that the heavy materialism of the English character would have hindered. Additionally, if England had been wise enough to wrap our newfound energy around her long-standing strength, her power would have been too solid to ever give way to the inevitable changes that empires face. Instead, the world could have seen the unbearable sight of a flawed yet indestructible sovereignty and institutions.

Nationally, there has ceased to be any peril of so inauspicious and yet outwardly attractive an amalgamation. But as an individual, the American is often conscious of the deep-rooted sympathies that belong more fitly to times gone by, and feels a blind pathetic tendency to wander back again, which makes itself evident in such wild dreams as I have alluded to above, about English inheritances. A mere coincidence of names (the Yankee one, perhaps, having been assumed by legislative permission), a supposititious pedigree, a silver mug on which an anciently engraved coat-of-arms has been half scrubbed out, a seal with an uncertain crest, an old yellow letter or document in faded ink, the more scantily legible the better,—rubbish of this kind, found in a neglected drawer, has been potent enough to turn the brain of many an honest Republican, especially if assisted by an advertisement for lost heirs, cut out of a British newspaper. There is no estimating or believing, till we come into a position to know it, what foolery lurks latent in the breasts of very sensible people. Remembering such sober extravagances, I should not be at all surprised to find that I am myself guilty of some unsuspected absurdity, that may appear to me the most substantial trait in my character.

Nationally, there’s no longer any danger of such a strangely appealing but ultimately unfavorable mix. However, as individuals, Americans often feel the deep-rooted connections tied to the past and experience a blind, poignant urge to look back, which shows up in the wild dreams I mentioned earlier about English heritage. A simple coincidence of names (maybe the Yankee name was adopted legally), a made-up family tree, a silver mug with a long-faded coat-of-arms that’s been partially scrubbed away, a seal with an unclear crest, or an old yellow letter written in faded ink—anything that’s barely legible—this kind of junk, found in a forgotten drawer, has been enough to drive many honest Republicans crazy, especially when paired with an ad for lost heirs clipped from a British newspaper. It’s impossible to estimate or believe what kind of nonsense can hide in the hearts of otherwise sensible people until we find ourselves in a position to see it. Keeping such serious absurdities in mind, I wouldn’t be surprised to discover that I’m guilty of some unexpected foolishness that I think is a fundamental part of who I am.

I might fill many pages with instances of this diseased American appetite for English soil. A respectable-looking woman, well advanced in life, of sour aspect, exceedingly homely, but decidedly New-Englandish in figure and manners, came to my office with a great bundle of documents, at the very first glimpse of which I apprehended something terrible. Nor was I mistaken. The bundle contained evidences of her indubitable claim to the site on which Castle Street, the Town Hall, the Exchange, and all the principal business part of Liverpool have long been situated; and with considerable peremptoriness, the good lady signified her expectation that I should take charge of her suit, and prosecute it to judgment; not, however, on the equitable condition of receiving half the value of the property recovered (which, in case of complete success, would have made both of us ten or twenty fold millionaires), but without recompense or reimbursement of legal expenses, solely as an incident of my official duty. Another time came two ladies, bearing a letter of emphatic introduction from his Excellency the Governor of their native State, who testified in most satisfactory terms to their social respectability. They were claimants of a great estate in Cheshire, and announced themselves as blood-relatives of Queen Victoria,—a point, however, which they deemed it expedient to keep in the background until their territorial rights should be established, apprehending that the Lord High Chancellor might otherwise be less likely to come to a fair decision in respect to them, from a probable disinclination to admit new members into the royal kin. Upon my honor, I imagine that they had an eye to the possibility of the eventual succession of one or both of them to the crown of Great Britain through superiority of title over the Brunswick line; although, being maiden ladies, like their predecessor Elizabeth, they could hardly have hoped to establish a lasting dynasty upon the throne. It proves, I trust, a certain disinterestedness on my part, that, encountering them thus in the dawn of their fortunes, I forbore to put in a plea for a future dukedom.

I could easily write a lot about this unhealthy American obsession with English land. A respectable-looking older woman, with a sour expression and quite plain features, but very much the embodiment of New England in both figure and demeanor, came to my office with a large bundle of documents. From the very first glance, I sensed something serious. And I was right. The bundle contained proof of her undeniable claim to the land where Castle Street, the Town Hall, the Exchange, and all the key business areas of Liverpool have long stood. With considerable insistence, the good woman made it clear that she expected me to take up her case and pursue it to a conclusion, not on the fair condition of receiving half the value of the property recovered (which, in the event of full success, would have made both of us incredibly wealthy), but without any compensation or reimbursement for legal fees, simply as part of my official duties. Another time, two ladies showed up with a letter of strong introduction from the Governor of their home state, who spoke highly of their social standing. They were claiming a large estate in Cheshire and identified themselves as relatives of Queen Victoria; however, they thought it best to keep that under wraps until their land rights were secured, fearing that the Lord High Chancellor might be less inclined to rule fairly if he knew they were royal kin. Honestly, I suspect they were hoping that one or both of them might one day have a shot at the British crown due to a superior claim over the Brunswick line; although, as unmarried women, like their predecessor Elizabeth, they probably couldn’t have realistically expected to establish a lasting dynasty on the throne. It shows, I hope, a degree of selflessness on my part that, meeting them at this early stage of their fortunes, I refrained from asking for a future dukedom.

Another visitor of the same class was a gentleman of refined manners, handsome figure, and remarkably intellectual aspect. Like many men of an adventurous cast, he had so quiet a deportment, and such an apparent disinclination to general sociability, that you would have fancied him moving always along some peaceful and secluded walk of life. Yet, literally from his first hour, he had been tossed upon the surges of a most varied and tumultuous existence, having been born at sea, of American parentage, but on board of a Spanish vessel, and spending many of the subsequent years in voyages, travels, and outlandish incidents and vicissitudes, which, methought, had hardly been paralleled since the days of Gulliver or De Foe. When his dignified reserve was overcome, he had the faculty of narrating these adventures with wonderful eloquence, working up his descriptive sketches with such intuitive perception of the picturesque points that the whole was thrown forward with a positively illusive effect, like matters of your own visual experience. In fact, they were so admirably done that I could never more than half believe them, because the genuine affairs of life are not apt to transact themselves so artistically. Many of his scenes were laid in the East, and among those seldom-visited archipelagoes of the Indian Ocean, so that there was an Oriental fragrance breathing through his talk and an odor of the Spice Islands still lingering in his garments. He had much to say of the delightful qualities of the Malay pirates, who, indeed, carry on a predatory warfare against the ships of all civilized nations, and cut every Christian throat among their prisoners; but (except for deeds of that character, which are the rule and habit of their life, and matter of religion and conscience with them) they are a gentle-natured people, of primitive innocence and integrity.

Another visitor of the same type was a gentleman with refined manners, a handsome appearance, and a remarkably intellectual vibe. Like many adventurous men, he had such a calm demeanor and an obvious reluctance for socializing that you might think he was always walking along some peaceful, secluded path in life. Yet, from his very first hour, he had been tossed into the waves of a highly varied and tumultuous life. He was born at sea to American parents on a Spanish ship and spent many of his following years in voyages, travels, and bizarre incidents that seemed hardly matched since the days of Gulliver or Defoe. When he let down his dignified reserve, he had a talent for narrating these adventures with incredible eloquence, crafting his descriptions with such an intuitive sense of the picturesque that it felt almost like real visual experiences. In fact, they were so well done that I could never fully believe them, since genuine life rarely unfolds with such artistry. Many of his stories took place in the East and among those rarely visited archipelagos of the Indian Ocean, imparting an exotic fragrance to his speech and leaving a lingering scent of the Spice Islands on his clothes. He spoke a lot about the entertaining traits of the Malay pirates, who indeed wage predatory warfare against the ships of all civilized nations and cut the throats of every Christian captive. But aside from those actions, which are part of their everyday life and deeply rooted in their beliefs, they are a gentle people, marked by a sense of primitive innocence and integrity.

But his best story was about a race of men (if men they were) who seemed so fully to realize Swift's wicked fable of the Yahoos, that my friend was much exercised with psychological speculations whether or no they had any souls. They dwelt in the wilds of Ceylon, like other savage beasts, hairy, and spotted with tufts of fur, filthy, shameless, weaponless (though warlike in their individual bent), tool-less, houseless, language-less, except for a few guttural sounds, hideously dissonant, whereby they held some rudest kind of communication among themselves. They lacked both memory and foresight, and were wholly destitute of government, social institutions, or law or rulership of any description, except the immediate tyranny of the strongest; radically untamable, moreover, save that the people of the country managed to subject a few of the less ferocious and stupid ones to outdoor servitude among their other cattle. They were beastly in almost all their attributes, and that to such a degree that the observer, losing sight of any link betwixt them and manhood, could generally witness their brutalities without greater horror than at those of some disagreeable quadruped in a menagerie. And yet, at times, comparing what were the lowest general traits in his own race with what was highest in these abominable monsters, he found a ghastly similitude that half compelled him to recognize them as human brethren.

But his best story was about a group of men (if they could be called that) who seemed to fully embody Swift's wicked tale of the Yahoos. My friend often found himself deep in psychological debates about whether or not they had souls. They lived in the wilds of Ceylon, like other savage creatures, hairy and spotted with patches of fur, filthy, shameless, without weapons (though individually aggressive), tool-less, houseless, and lacking a language, except for a few guttural sounds that were harshly discordant, through which they managed to communicate in the most primitive way. They had no memory or foresight and were entirely without government, social structures, or any form of law or authority, aside from the immediate domination of the strongest. They were fundamentally untamable, though the local people had managed to make a few of the less violent and dull-witted ones into outdoor servants alongside their livestock. They were beastly in nearly all their characteristics, to such an extent that an observer, losing sight of any connection between them and humanity, could usually witness their brutality without feeling more horror than at some unpleasant animal in a zoo. Yet, at times, when he compared the lowest traits of his own race with the highest of these abhorrent creatures, he found a disturbing similarity that forced him to acknowledge them as human relatives.

After these Gulliverian researches, my agreeable acquaintance had fallen under the ban of the Dutch government, and had suffered (this, at least, being matter of fact) nearly two years' imprisonment, with confiscation of a large amount of property, for which Mr. Belmont, our minister at the Hague, had just made a peremptory demand of reimbursement and damages. Meanwhile, since arriving in England on his way to the United States, he had been providentially led to inquire into the circumstances of his birth on shipboard, and had discovered that not himself alone, but another baby, had come into the world during the same voyage of the prolific vessel, and that there were almost irrefragable reasons for believing that these two children had been assigned to the wrong mothers. Many reminiscences of his early days confirmed him in the idea that his nominal parents were aware of the exchange. The family to which he felt authorized to attribute his lineage was that of a nobleman, in the picture-gallery of whose country-seat (whence, if I mistake not, our adventurous friend had just returned) he had discovered a portrait bearing a striking resemblance to himself. As soon as he should have reported the outrageous action of the Dutch government to President Pierce and the Secretary of State, and recovered the confiscated property, he purposed to return to England and establish his claim to the nobleman's title and estate.

After all his Gulliver-like adventures, my friendly companion had fallen out of favor with the Dutch government and had spent nearly two years in prison, plus had a large amount of his property confiscated. Mr. Belmont, our minister in The Hague, had just made a firm demand for reimbursement and damages. Meanwhile, since arriving in England on his way to the United States, he had been surprisingly led to investigate his birth circumstances aboard a ship and found out that not just he, but another baby, had been born during that same journey. There were strong reasons to believe these two babies had been given to the wrong mothers. Many memories from his early life convinced him that his so-called parents knew about the mix-up. He felt he could attribute his lineage to a noble family, as he had found a portrait in the art gallery of their country house (from where, if I remember correctly, our adventurous friend had just returned) that looked strikingly like him. Once he reported the Dutch government's outrageous actions to President Pierce and the Secretary of State and got back his confiscated property, he planned to return to England and claim the noble title and estate.

I had accepted his Oriental fantasies (which, indeed, to do him justice, have been recorded by scientific societies among the genuine phenomena of natural history), not as matters of indubitable credence, but as allowable specimens of an imaginative traveller's vivid coloring and rich embroidery on the coarse texture and dull neutral tints of truth. The English romance was among the latest communications that he intrusted to my private ear; and as soon as I heard the first chapter,—so wonderfully akin to what I might have wrought out of my own head, not unpractised in such figments,—I began to repent having made myself responsible for the future nobleman's passage homeward in the next Collins steamer. Nevertheless, should his English rent-roll fall a little behindhand, his Dutch claim for a hundred thousand dollars was certainly in the hands of our government, and might at least be valuable to the extent of thirty pounds, which I had engaged to pay on his behalf. But I have reason to fear that his Dutch riches turned out to be Dutch gilt, or fairy gold, and his English country-seat a mere castle in the air,—which I exceedingly regret, for he was a delightful companion and a very gentlemanly man.

I had accepted his Eastern fantasies (which, to be fair, have been documented by scientific societies as genuine phenomena in natural history), not as things I fully believed, but as interesting examples of an imaginative traveler’s vivid storytelling and rich embellishments on the plain fabric and dull colors of reality. The English romance was one of the last things he shared with me privately; and as soon as I heard the first chapter—so strikingly similar to what I might have come up with myself, being somewhat skilled in such fabrications—I began to regret that I had taken on the responsibility of arranging the future nobleman's trip back home on the next Collins steamer. However, if his English rent collection fell behind a bit, his Dutch claim for a hundred thousand dollars was definitely with our government and might at least be worth thirty pounds, which I had promised to cover for him. But I worry that his Dutch wealth turned out to be just gilded claims, or fairy gold, and his English country house a mere fantasy—which I deeply regret, as he was a wonderful companion and a truly gentlemanly man.

A Consul, in his position of universal responsibility, the general adviser and helper, sometimes finds himself compelled to assume the guardianship of personages who, in their own sphere, are supposed capable of superintending the highest interests of whole communities. An elderly Irishman, a naturalized citizen, once put the desire and expectation of all our penniless vagabonds into a very suitable phrase, by pathetically entreating me to be a "father to him"; and, simple as I sit scribbling here, I have acted a father's part, not only by scores of such unthrifty old children as himself, but by a progeny of far loftier pretensions. It may be well for persons who are conscious of any radical weakness in their character, any besetting sin, any unlawful propensity, any unhallowed impulse, which (while surrounded with the manifold restraints that protect a man from that treacherous and lifelong enemy, his lower self, in the circle of society where he is at home) they may have succeeded in keeping under the lock and key of strictest propriety,—it may be well for them, before seeking the perilous freedom of a distant land, released from the watchful eyes of neighborhoods and coteries, lightened of that wearisome burden, an immaculate name, and blissfully obscure after years of local prominence,—it may be well for such individuals to know that when they set foot on a foreign shore, the long-imprisoned Evil, scenting a wild license in the unaccustomed atmosphere, is apt to grow riotous in its iron cage. It rattles the rusty barriers with gigantic turbulence, and if there be an infirm joint anywhere in the framework, it breaks madly forth, compressing the mischief of a lifetime into a little space.

A Consul, in his role of universal responsibility as the main advisor and helper, sometimes finds himself needing to take care of people who, in their own areas, are expected to manage the significant interests of entire communities. An older Irishman, who had become a citizen, once expressed the wishes and hopes of all our broke wanderers by sadly asking me to be a "father to him." And as I sit here writing, I have played the role of a father, not just for many such careless old souls like him, but also for those with much higher aspirations. It might be wise for people who are aware of any serious flaws in their character, any recurring sins, any illegal inclinations, or any unsanctioned urges—which, while surrounded by the many restraints that protect a person from that deceitful and lifelong enemy, their lower self, in the community where they feel at home, they may have managed to keep locked away under strict propriety—before seeking the risky freedom of a distant land, freed from the scrutinizing eyes of neighborhoods and social circles, unburdened by the tiresome weight of an untarnished reputation, and blissfully anonymous after years of local prominence. It might be essential for such individuals to understand that when they step onto foreign soil, the long-caged Evil, sensing a wild freedom in the unfamiliar atmosphere, is likely to stir violently in its iron cage. It shakes the rusty barriers with massive turbulence, and if there’s any weak point in the structure, it bursts forth uncontrollably, compressing the chaos of a lifetime into a short period.

A parcel of letters had been accumulating at the Consulate for two or three weeks, directed to a certain Doctor of Divinity, who had left America by a sailing-packet and was still upon the sea. In due time, the vessel arrived, and the reverend Doctor paid me a visit. He was a fine-looking middle-aged gentleman, a perfect model of clerical propriety, scholar-like, yet with the air of a man of the world rather than a student, though overspread with the graceful sanctity of a popular metropolitan divine, a part of whose duty it might be to exemplify the natural accordance between Christianity and good-breeding. He seemed a little excited, as an American is apt to be on first arriving in England, but conversed with intelligence as well as animation, making himself so agreeable that his visit stood out in considerable relief from the monotony of my daily commonplace. As I learned from authentic sources, he was somewhat distinguished in his own region for fervor and eloquence in the pulpit, but was now compelled to relinquish it temporarily for the purpose of renovating his impaired health by an extensive tour in Europe. Promising to dine with me, he took up his bundle of letters and went away.

A stack of letters had been piling up at the Consulate for two or three weeks, addressed to a certain Doctor of Divinity who had left America on a sailing ship and was still at sea. Eventually, the vessel arrived, and the reverend Doctor came to visit me. He was a handsome middle-aged man, a perfect example of clerical propriety, scholarly but with the demeanor of a worldly man rather than just a student, yet radiating the graceful sanctity of a well-known metropolitan divine, whose duty might include showing the natural connection between Christianity and good manners. He seemed a bit excited, as Americans often do when they first arrive in England, but spoke with both intelligence and enthusiasm, making his visit stand out in sharp contrast to the monotony of my everyday life. From what I learned from reliable sources, he was somewhat well-known in his area for his passion and eloquence in the pulpit, but had to set that aside temporarily to restore his health through an extensive tour of Europe. After promising to have dinner with me, he gathered his letters and left.

The Doctor, however, failed to make his appearance at dinner-time, or to apologize the next day for his absence; and in the course of a day or two more, I forgot all about him, concluding that he must have set forth on his Continental travels, the plan of which he had sketched out at our interview. But, by and by, I received a call from the master of the vessel in which he had arrived. He was in some alarm about his passenger, whose luggage remained on shipboard, but of whom nothing had been heard or seen since the moment of his departure from the Consulate. We conferred together, the captain and I, about the expediency of setting the police on the traces (if any were to be found) of our vanished friend; but it struck me that the good captain was singularly reticent, and that there was something a little mysterious in a few points that he hinted at rather than expressed; so that, scrutinizing the affair carefully, I surmised that the intimacy of life on shipboard might have taught him more about the reverend gentleman than, for some reason or other, he deemed it prudent to reveal. At home, in our native country, I would have looked to the Doctor's personal safety and left his reputation to take care of itself, knowing that the good fame of a thousand saintly clergymen would amply dazzle out any lamentable spot on a single brother's character. But in scornful and invidious England, on the idea that the credit of the sacred office was measurably intrusted to my discretion, I could not endure, for the sake of American Doctors of Divinity generally, that this particular Doctor should cut an ignoble figure in the police reports of the English newspapers, except at the last necessity. The clerical body, I flatter myself, will acknowledge that I acted on their own principle. Besides, it was now too late; the mischief and violence, if any had been impending, were not of a kind which it requires the better part of a week to perpetrate; and to sum up the entire matter, I felt certain, from a good deal of somewhat similar experience, that, if the missing Doctor still breathed this vital air, he would turn up at the Consulate as soon as his money should be stolen or spent.

The Doctor, however, didn’t show up for dinner or apologize the next day for his absence; and after a day or two, I completely forgot about him, assuming he must have left for his trip across Europe, which he had mentioned during our meeting. But eventually, I got a visit from the captain of the ship he arrived on. He was worried about his passenger, whose luggage was still on board, and they hadn’t heard from him since he left the Consulate. The captain and I discussed whether we should involve the police to find our missing friend; however, I noticed that the captain was unusually reserved and hinted at some things he didn’t fully express. It made me think that life on the ship might have revealed more about the reverend than he felt comfortable sharing. Back home, I would have prioritized the Doctor’s safety and let his reputation take care of itself, knowing that the good name of numerous virtuous clergymen would easily overshadow any questionable aspect of one’s character. But in judgmental and spiteful England, since the reputation of the clergy seemed partially dependent on my discretion, I couldn’t bear the thought of this particular Doctor being portrayed poorly in English newspaper reports, unless absolutely necessary. I like to think the clergy would agree that I acted according to their principles. Besides, it was too late now; if there was any trouble brewing, it wouldn’t take more than a few days to happen. To sum it all up, I was confident, based on similar experiences, that if the missing Doctor was still alive, he would show up at the Consulate as soon as his money ran out or got stolen.

Precisely a week after this reverend person's disappearance, there came to my office a tall, middle-aged gentleman in a blue military surtout, braided at the seams, but out at elbows, and as shabby as if the wearer had been bivouacking in it throughout a Crimean campaign. It was buttoned up to the very chin, except where three or four of the buttons were lost; nor was there any glimpse of a white shirt-collar illuminating the rusty black cravat. A grisly mustache was just beginning to roughen the stranger's upper lip. He looked disreputable to the last degree, but still had a ruined air of good society glimmering about him, like a few specks of polish on a sword-blade that has lain corroding in a mud-puddle. I took him to be some American marine officer, of dissipated habits, or perhaps a cashiered British major, stumbling into the wrong quarters through the unrectified bewilderment of last night's debauch. He greeted me, however, with polite familiarity, as though we had been previously acquainted; whereupon I drew coldly back (as sensible people naturally do, whether from strangers or former friends, when too evidently at odds with fortune) and requested to know who my visitor might be, and what was his business at the Consulate. "Am I then so changed?" he exclaimed with a vast depth of tragic intonation; and after a little blind and bewildered talk, behold! the truth flashed upon me. It was the Doctor of Divinity! If I had meditated a scene or a coup de theatre, I could not have contrived a more effectual one than by this simple and genuine difficulty of recognition. The poor Divine must have felt that he had lost his personal identity through the misadventures of one little week. And, to say the truth, he did look as if, like Job, on account of his especial sanctity, he had been delivered over to the direst temptations of Satan, and proving weaker than the man of Uz, the Arch Enemy had been empowered to drag him through Tophet, transforming him, in the process, from the most decorous of metropolitan clergymen into the rowdiest and dirtiest of disbanded officers. I never fathomed the mystery of his military costume, but conjectured that a lurking sense of fitness had induced him to exchange his clerical garments for this habit of a sinner; nor can I tell precisely into what pitfall, not more of vice than terrible calamity, he had precipitated himself,—being more than satisfied to know that the outcasts of society can sink no lower than this poor, desecrated wretch had sunk.

Exactly a week after this reverend person's disappearance, a tall, middle-aged man in a blue military coat, braided at the seams but frayed at the elbows, came to my office. He looked as shabby as if he had been camping out in it throughout the Crimean campaign. The coat was buttoned up to the chin, except for where three or four buttons were missing; there was no sight of a white shirt collar to brighten up the worn-out black cravat. A grizzled mustache was just starting to grow on the stranger's upper lip. He looked completely disreputable but still had a faded air of good society about him, like a few spots of polish on a sword that had been rusting in a muddy puddle. I figured he was some American marine officer with a drinking problem, or maybe a discharged British major, wandering into the wrong place after the confusion of last night’s binge. However, he greeted me with a friendly familiarity, as if we had met before; this made me pull back a bit (as anyone would, whether from strangers or old friends, when clearly out of luck) and I asked who he was and what he needed at the Consulate. "Have I really changed so much?" he exclaimed with a deep, tragic tone; and after a bit of blind and confused conversation, the truth suddenly hit me. It was the Doctor of Divinity! If I had planned a dramatic moment or a theatrical scene, I couldn't have come up with a more effective one than this simple yet genuine difficulty in recognizing him. The poor Divine must have felt like he had lost his sense of personal identity after just one week of misfortune. To be honest, he did look like, like Job, due to his exceptional sanctity, he had been subjected to the worst temptations of Satan, and proving weaker than the man of Uz, the Arch Enemy had dragged him through Hell, transforming him from the most respectable of city clergymen into the rowdiest and dirtiest of discharged officers. I never understood how he ended up in that military outfit, but I guessed a sense of appropriateness made him swap his clerical clothing for this sinner's garb; nor can I say exactly what kind of trap, more of disaster than vice, he had fallen into—I was just glad to know that the outcasts of society couldn’t sink any lower than this poor, desecrated wretch had.

The opportunity, I presume, does not often happen to a layman, of administering moral and religious reproof to a Doctor of Divinity; but finding the occasion thrust upon me, and the hereditary Puritan waxing strong in my breast, I deemed it a matter of conscience not to let it pass entirely unimproved. The truth is, I was unspeakably shocked and disgusted. Not, however, that I was then to learn that clergymen are made of the same flesh and blood as other people, and perhaps lack one small safeguard which the rest of us possess, because they are aware of their own peccability, and therefore cannot look up to the clerical class for the proof of the possibility of a pure life on earth, with such reverential confidence as we are prone to do. But I remembered the innocent faith of my boyhood, and the good old silver-headed clergyman, who seemed to me as much a saint then on earth as he is now in heaven, and partly for whose sake, through all these darkening years, I retain a devout, though not intact nor unwavering respect for the entire fraternity. What a hideous wrong, therefore, had the backslider inflicted on his brethren, and still more on me, who much needed whatever fragments of broken reverence (broken, not as concerned religion, but its earthly institutions and professors) it might yet be possible to patch into a sacred image! Should all pulpits and communion-tables have thenceforth a stain upon them, and the guilty one go unrebuked for it? So I spoke to the unhappy man as I never thought myself warranted in speaking to any other mortal, hitting him hard, doing my utmost to find out his vulnerable part, and prick him into the depths of it. And not without more effect than I had dreamed of, or desired!

The chance, I guess, doesn’t often come to a regular person to give moral and religious criticism to a Doctor of Divinity; but since the situation presented itself, and the Puritan side in me was growing stronger, I felt it was my duty not to let it pass without saying something. The truth is, I was utterly shocked and disgusted. Not that I was surprised to learn that clergymen are made of the same flesh and blood as everyone else, and might even lack one little safeguard that the rest of us have, because they know they can make mistakes and therefore can’t inspire us with the same kind of reverence that we often feel for them. But I remembered the innocent faith of my childhood and the kind old clergyman with silver hair, who seemed to me then to be as much a saint on earth as he is now in heaven, and partly for his sake, through all these darkening years, I hold on to a respectful, though not entirely complete or unwavering, regard for the entire clergy. What a terrible wrong the backslider did to his fellow ministers, and even more to me, who desperately needed any remnants of broken reverence (broken not in the sense of faith, but in relation to its earthly institutions and representatives) that could still be pieced together into a sacred image! Should all pulpits and communion tables now bear a stain and the guilty party go unchallenged for it? So I spoke to the unfortunate man in a way I never thought I could with anyone else, confronting him harshly, doing my best to find his weak spot, and digging deep into it. And it had more impact than I had imagined or hoped for!

No doubt, the novelty of the Doctor's reversed position, thus standing up to receive such a fulmination as the clergy have heretofore arrogated the exclusive right of inflicting, might give additional weight and sting to the words which I found utterance for. But there was another reason (which, had I in the least suspected it, would have closed my lips at once) for his feeling morbidly sensitive to the cruel rebuke that I administered. The unfortunate man had come to me, laboring under one of the consequences of his riotous outbreak, in the shape of delirium tremens; he bore a hell within the compass of his own breast, all the torments of which blazed up with tenfold inveteracy when I thus took upon myself the Devil's office of stirring up the red-hot embers. His emotions, as well as the external movement and expression of them by voice, countenance, and gesture, were terribly exaggerated by the tremendous vibration of nerves resulting from the disease. It was the deepest tragedy I ever witnessed. I know sufficiently, from that one experience, how a condemned soul would manifest its agonies; and for the future, if I have anything to do with sinners, I mean to operate upon them through sympathy, and not rebuke. What had I to do with rebuking him? The disease, long latent in his heart, had shown itself in a frightful eruption on the surface of his life. That was all! Is it a thing to scold the sufferer for?

No doubt, the novelty of the Doctor's changed role, standing up to face a criticism that the clergy had previously taken for themselves, might have added extra weight and sting to my words. But there was another reason (which, had I suspected it even a little, would have made me stay silent immediately) for his acute sensitivity to the harsh reprimand I delivered. The poor man had come to me suffering from one of the effects of his wild behavior, experiencing delirium tremens; he carried hell within him, and all the torment flared up even more intensely when I took on the Devil's role of igniting those raw emotions. His feelings, as well as how he expressed them through his voice, face, and gestures, were incredibly amplified by the intense nerve agitation caused by the illness. It was the saddest tragedy I ever saw. From that single experience, I learned how a tormented soul would express its pain; and moving forward, if I deal with sinners, I plan to connect with them through empathy, not criticism. What right did I have to scold him? The illness, long hidden in his heart, had erupted in a terrifying way on the surface of his life. That was it! Is there any reason to chastise the sufferer for that?

To conclude this wretched story, the poor Doctor of Divinity, having been robbed of all his money in this little airing beyond the limits of propriety, was easily persuaded to give up the intended tour and return to his bereaved flock, who, very probably, were thereafter conscious of an increased unction in his soul-stirring eloquence, without suspecting the awful depths into which their pastor had dived in quest of it. His voice is now silent. I leave it to members of his own profession to decide whether it was better for him thus to sin outright, and so to be let into the miserable secret what manner of man he was, or to have gone through life outwardly unspotted, making the first discovery of his latent evil at the judgment-seat. It has occurred to me that his dire calamity, as both he and I regarded it, might have been the only method by which precisely such a man as himself, and so situated, could be redeemed. He has learned, ere now, how that matter stood.

To wrap up this miserable story, the poor Doctor of Divinity, after being robbed of all his money during a little trip outside the lines of decency, was easily convinced to cancel his planned tour and return to his grief-stricken congregation, who likely felt an enhanced depth in his powerful speeches without realizing the dark depths their pastor had sunk to in search of it. His voice is now silent. I’ll leave it to others in his profession to decide if it was better for him to sin openly and be faced with the harsh truth of the kind of person he was or to have lived a seemingly spotless life, only to discover his hidden flaws at the judgment day. I’ve thought that his terrible fate, as both he and I saw it, might have been the only way someone like him, in his situation, could find redemption. He has surely come to understand how things truly were.

For a man, with a natural tendency to meddle with other people's business, there could not possibly be a more congenial sphere than the Liverpool Consulate. For myself, I had never been in the habit of feeling that I could sufficiently comprehend any particular conjunction of circumstances with human character, to justify me in thrusting in my awkward agency among the intricate and unintelligible machinery of Providence. I have always hated to give advice, especially when there is a prospect of its being taken. It is only one-eyed people who love to advise, or have any spontaneous promptitude of action. When a man opens both his eyes, he generally sees about as many reasons for acting in any one way as in any other, and quite as many for acting in neither; and is therefore likely to leave his friends to regulate their own conduct, and also to remain quiet as regards his especial affairs till necessity shall prick him onward. Nevertheless, the world and individuals flourish upon a constant succession of blunders. The secret of English practical success lies in their characteristic faculty of shutting one eye, whereby they get so distinct and decided a view of what immediately concerns them that they go stumbling towards it over a hundred insurmountable obstacles, and achieve a magnificent triumph without ever being aware of half its difficulties. If General McClellan could but have shut his left eye, the right one would long ago have guided us into Richmond. Meanwhile, I have strayed far away from the Consulate, where, as I was about to say, I was compelled, in spite of my disinclination, to impart both advice and assistance in multifarious affairs that did not personally concern me, and presume that I effected about as little mischief as other men in similar contingencies. The duties of the office carried me to prisons, police-courts, hospitals, lunatic asylums, coroner's inquests, death-beds, funerals, and brought me in contact with insane people, criminals, ruined speculators, wild adventurers, diplomatists, brother-consuls, and all manner of simpletons and unfortunates, in greater number and variety than I had ever dreamed of as pertaining to America; in addition to whom there was an equivalent multitude of English rogues, dexterously counterfeiting the genuine Yankee article. It required great discrimination not to be taken in by these last-mentioned scoundrels; for they knew how to imitate our national traits, had been at great pains to instruct themselves as regarded American localities, and were not readily to be caught by a cross-examination as to the topographical features, public institutions, or prominent inhabitants of the places where they pretended to belong. The best shibboleth I ever hit upon lay in the pronunciation of the word "been," which the English invariably make to rhyme with "green," and we Northerners, at least (in accordance, I think, with the custom of Shakespeare's time), universally pronounce "bin."

For someone who naturally tends to meddle in other people's affairs, there couldn't be a better place than the Liverpool Consulate. Personally, I've never felt capable of fully understanding any specific situation or how it relates to human behavior enough to justify my awkward involvement in the complex and confusing workings of fate. I've always disliked giving advice, especially when there's a chance it might be acted on. It's only narrow-minded people who enjoy advising others or act on impulse. When someone opens both their eyes, they usually see just as many reasons to act one way as another, and just as many reasons to not act at all; thus, they're likely to leave their friends to manage their own decisions and to hold off on their own affairs until there's a real reason to move. Still, the world and individuals thrive on a never-ending cycle of mistakes. The secret of English practical success lies in their unique ability to close one eye, which allows them to focus so clearly on what affects them right now that they stumble over countless daunting obstacles and achieve great success without realizing half of the challenges involved. If General McClellan had just closed his left eye, his right one would have guided us to Richmond long ago. Meanwhile, I've strayed far from the Consulate, where I was reluctantly compelled to give both advice and assistance in numerous matters that didn't directly concern me, and I assume I caused about as little trouble as others would in the same situations. The responsibilities of the position took me to prisons, police courts, hospitals, mental asylums, coroner's inquests, deathbeds, funerals, and introduced me to insane individuals, criminals, failed entrepreneurs, reckless adventurers, diplomats, fellow consuls, and all sorts of fools and unfortunate souls—more than I ever imagined were part of America; in addition, there was an equivalent number of English crooks skillfully pretending to be the genuine American deal. It took a lot of discernment not to be fooled by these last villains; they knew how to imitate our national characteristics, had educated themselves about American places, and could avoid being easily caught off guard during questioning about the geographical features, public institutions, or notable figures of the places they claimed to be from. The best trick I ever discovered was in how the word "been" is pronounced; the English always rhyme it with "green," while we Northerners (following what I think is the custom from Shakespeare's time) universally pronounce it "bin."

All the matters that I have been treating of, however, were merely incidental, and quite distinct from the real business of the office. A great part of the wear and tear of mind and temper resulted from the bad relations between the seamen and officers of American ships. Scarcely a morning passed, but that some sailor came to show the marks of his ill-usage on shipboard. Often, it was a whole crew of them, each with his broken head or livid bruise, and all testifying with one voice to a constant series of savage outrages during the voyage; or, it might be, they laid an accusation of actual murder, perpetrated by the first or second officers with many blows of steel-knuckles, a rope's end, or a marline-spike, or by the captain, in the twinkling of an eye, with a shot of his pistol. Taking the seamen's view of the case, you would suppose that the gibbet was hungry for the murderers. Listening to the captain's defence, you would seem to discover that he and his officers were the humanest of mortals, but were driven to a wholesome severity by the mutinous conduct of the crew, who, moreover, had themselves slain their comrade in the drunken riot and confusion of the first day or two after they were shipped. Looked at judicially, there appeared to be no right side to the matter, nor any right side possible in so thoroughly vicious a system as that of the American mercantile marine. The Consul could do little, except to take depositions, hold forth the greasy Testament to be profaned anew with perjured kisses, and, in a few instances of murder or manslaughter, carry the case before an English magistrate, who generally decided that the evidence was too contradictory to authorize the transmission of the accused for trial in America. The newspapers all over England contained paragraphs, inveighing against the cruelties of American shipmasters. The British Parliament took up the matter (for nobody is so humane as John Bull, when his benevolent propensities are to be gratified by finding fault with his neighbor), and caused Lord John Russell to remonstrate with our government on the outrages for which it was responsible before the world, and which it failed to prevent or punish. The American Secretary of State, old General Cass, responded, with perfectly astounding ignorance of the subject, to the effect that the statements of outrages had probably been exaggerated, that the present laws of the United States were quite adequate to deal with them, and that the interference of the British Minister was uncalled for.

All the issues I’ve been discussing were just side points and completely separate from the main business of the office. A big part of the stress and frustration came from the poor relationship between the sailors and officers on American ships. Almost every morning, some sailor would come in showing the signs of mistreatment on board. Often, it was an entire crew, each sporting a broken head or a nasty bruise, all speaking in unison about a constant stream of brutal attacks during the voyage; or they would accuse the first or second officers of outright murder, committed with steel knuckles, a rope, or a marline spike, or by the captain, who might shoot them in the blink of an eye. If you listened to the sailors, you’d think the gallows were calling for the murderers. From the captain’s perspective, though, he and his officers seemed to be the kindest people, forced into harsh discipline because of the crew’s rebellious behavior, and also because the crew had killed one of their own during a drunken riot in the chaos of the first few days after joining the ship. Judging it judicially, it seemed like there was no right side at all to such a thoroughly corrupt system as that of the American merchant marine. The Consul could do little more than take statements, hold up a greasy Bible to be profaned with false oaths, and in a few cases of murder or manslaughter, bring the matter before an English magistrate, who usually decided that the evidence was too conflicting to send the accused to America for trial. Newspapers across England published articles condemning the brutality of American ship captains. The British Parliament took notice (because no one can be more humane than John Bull when his kindness is satisfied by criticizing his neighbors), and had Lord John Russell protest to our government about the abuses it was accountable for in front of the world, which it failed to prevent or punish. The American Secretary of State, old General Cass, replied with astonishing ignorance, suggesting that claims of abuse were likely exaggerated, that the current laws in the United States were sufficient to address these issues, and that the British Minister’s interference was unnecessary.

The truth is, that the state of affairs was really very horrible, and could be met by no laws at that time (or I presume now) in existence. I once thought of writing a pamphlet on the subject, but quitted the Consulate before finding time to effect my purpose; and all that phase of my life immediately assumed so dreamlike a consistency that I despaired of making it seem solid or tangible to the public. And now it looks distant and dim, like troubles of a century ago. The origin of the evil lay in the character of the seamen, scarcely any of whom were American, but the offscourings and refuse of all the seaports of the world, such stuff as piracy is made of, together with a considerable intermixture of returning emigrants, and a sprinkling of absolutely kidnapped American citizens. Even with such material, the ships were very inadequately manned. The shipmaster found himself upon the deep, with a vast responsibility of property and human life upon his hands, and no means of salvation except by compelling his inefficient and demoralized crew to heavier exertions than could reasonably be required of the same number of able seamen. By law he had been intrusted with no discretion of judicious punishment, he therefore habitually left the whole matter of discipline to his irresponsible mates, men often of scarcely a superior quality to the crew. Hence ensued a great mass of petty outrages, unjustifiable assaults, shameful indignities, and nameless cruelty, demoralizing alike to the perpetrators and the sufferers; these enormities fell into the ocean between the two countries, and could be punished in neither. Many miserable stories come back upon my memory as I write; wrongs that were immense, but for which nobody could be held responsible, and which, indeed, the closer you looked into them, the more they lost the aspect of wilful misdoing and assumed that of an inevitable calamity. It was the fault of a system, the misfortune of an individual. Be that as it may, however, there will be no possibility of dealing effectually with these troubles as long as we deem it inconsistent with our national dignity or interests to allow the English courts, under such restrictions as may seem fit, a jurisdiction over offences perpetrated on board our vessels in mid-ocean.

The reality is that the situation was really terrible, and there were no laws at that time (or I assume there still aren't now) that could address it. I once considered writing a pamphlet on the issue, but I left the Consulate before I could find the time to do it; that whole chapter of my life became so surreal that I lost hope of making it feel real or concrete to the public. Now it feels distant and vague, like issues from a century ago. The root of the problem lay in the nature of the sailors, barely any of whom were American, but rather the dregs and rejects from seaports around the world—basically the kind of people who turn to piracy—along with a significant mix of returning immigrants and a few American citizens who had been outright kidnapped. Even with such a crew, the ships were poorly staffed. The captain found himself at sea, bearing a huge responsibility for both property and human lives, with no means of rescue other than forcing his ineffective and demoralized crew to work harder than could reasonably be expected from the same number of competent sailors. Legally, he had no authority to impose fair punishment, so he typically left all matters of discipline to his irresponsible mates, who were often not much better than the crew themselves. This led to a lot of minor abuses, unjustified attacks, shameful humiliations, and unnameable cruelty that were demoralizing to both the perpetrators and the victims; these outrages took place in the ocean between the two countries and went unpunished by either. Many sad stories come to my mind as I write; immense wrongs for which no one could be held accountable, and which, in fact, the more closely you examined them, the more they seemed less like deliberate wrongdoing and more like unavoidable disasters. It was the fault of a system, a misfortune for individuals. Regardless, there will be no effective way to address these issues as long as we consider it beneath our national dignity or interests to allow English courts, under whatever conditions seem appropriate, to have jurisdiction over offenses committed on our ships in mid-ocean.

In such a life as this, the American shipmaster develops himself into a man of iron energies, dauntless courage, and inexhaustible resource, at the expense, it must be acknowledged, of some of the higher and gentler traits which might do him excellent service in maintaining his authority. The class has deteriorated of late years on account of the narrower field of selection, owing chiefly to the diminution of that excellent body of respectably educated New England seamen, from the flower of whom the officers used to be recruited. Yet I found them, in many cases, very agreeable and intelligent companions, with less nonsense about them than landsmen usually have, eschewers of fine-spun theories, delighting in square and tangible ideas, but occasionally infested with prejudices that stuck to their brains like barnacles to a ship's bottom. I never could flatter myself that I was a general favorite with them. One or two, perhaps, even now, would scarcely meet me on amicable terms. Endowed universally with a great pertinacity of will, they especially disliked the interference of a consul with their management on shipboard; notwithstanding which I thrust in my very limited authority at every available opening, and did the utmost that lay in my power, though with lamentably small effect, towards enforcing a better kind of discipline. They thought, no doubt (and on plausible grounds enough, but scarcely appreciating just that one little grain of hard New England sense, oddly thrown in among the flimsier composition of the Consul's character), that he, a landsman, a bookman, and, as people said of him, a fanciful recluse, could not possibly understand anything of the difficulties or the necessities of a shipmaster's position. But their cold regards were rather acceptable than otherwise, for it is exceedingly awkward to assume a judicial austerity in the morning towards a man with whom you have been hobnobbing over night.

In a life like this, the American shipmaster becomes a person of strong will, fearless courage, and endless resourcefulness, although it must be admitted that this comes at the cost of some of the nobler and gentler qualities that could really help him maintain his authority. The profession has declined in recent years due to a smaller pool of candidates, mainly because of the decrease in that excellent group of well-educated New England seamen, from whom the officers used to be chosen. Still, I found many of them to be pleasant and intelligent company, with less nonsense than typical landsmen, shunning complicated theories, and favoring straightforward ideas, but occasionally burdened by prejudices that clung to their minds like barnacles to a ship's hull. I never really thought of myself as a popular figure among them. Even now, there are probably one or two who wouldn't even greet me warmly. They all had a strong determination and particularly disliked any interference from a consul regarding their management on the ship; nevertheless, I inserted my very limited authority whenever I could and did my best, although with disappointing results, to enforce a better kind of discipline. They probably believed (with some justification, but failing to recognize that tiny bit of solid New England sense oddly mixed into the Consul's otherwise flimsy character) that he, being a landsman, a bookish type, and, as people described him, a fanciful recluse, could never understand the challenges or needs that a shipmaster faces. However, their chilly attitudes were somewhat welcome because it’s really awkward to act stern in the morning towards someone you’ve been socializing with the night before.

With the technical details of the business of that great Consulate (for great it then was, though now, I fear, wofully fallen off, and perhaps never to be revived in anything like its former extent), I did not much interfere. They could safely be left to the treatment of two as faithful, upright, and competent subordinates, both Englishmen, as ever a man was fortunate enough to meet with, in a line of life altogether new and strange to him. I had come over with instructions to supply both their places with Americans, but, possessing a happy faculty of knowing my own interest and the public's, I quietly kept hold of them, being little inclined to open the consular doors to a spy of the State Department or an intriguer for my own office. The venerable Vice-Consul, Mr. Pearce, had witnessed the successive arrivals of a score of newly appointed Consuls, shadowy and short-lived dignitaries, and carried his reminiscences back to the epoch of Consul Maury, who was appointed by Washington, and has acquired almost the grandeur of a mythical personage in the annals of the Consulate. The principal clerk, Mr. Wilding, who has since succeeded to the Vice-Consulship, was a man of English integrity,—not that the English are more honest than ourselves, but only there is a certain sturdy reliableness common among them, which we do not quite so invariably manifest in just these subordinate positions,—of English integrity, combined with American acuteness of intellect, quick-wittedness, and diversity of talent. It seemed an immense pity that he should wear out his life at a desk, without a step in advance from year's end to year's end, when, had it been his luck to be born on our side of the water, his bright faculties and clear probity would have insured him eminent success in whatever path he night adopt. Meanwhile, it would have been a sore mischance to me, had any better fortune on his part deprived me of Mr. Wilding's services.

I didn’t get too involved in the technical details of the business at that big Consulate (and it was big back then, though now, I fear, it's sadly declined and probably won't regain its former size). I felt confident leaving things in the hands of two loyal, honest, and capable English subordinates who were among the best I could have hoped for in a job that was entirely new and unfamiliar to me. I had come with orders to replace both of them with Americans, but since I understood my own interests and what was best for the public, I held onto them, not wanting to open the consular doors to a government spy or someone scheming for my own position. The long-serving Vice-Consul, Mr. Pearce, had seen many newly appointed Consuls come and go—fleeting dignitaries—and he recalled the era of Consul Maury, who was appointed by Washington and has become almost legendary in the history of the Consulate. The main clerk, Mr. Wilding, who eventually took over the Vice-Consul position, was a man of English integrity—not that the English are inherently more honest than we are, but they tend to have a certain reliability that we don’t always show in these lower positions—mixed with American sharpness, quick thinking, and a range of skills. It seemed such a waste for him to spend his life at a desk without any advancement from year to year, when if he had been born on our side of the ocean, his talents and clear integrity would have ensured him great success in whatever path he chose. Meanwhile, it would have been a real loss for me if any better luck for him had taken him away from my team.

A fair amount of common-sense, some acquaintance with the United States Statutes, an insight into character, a tact of management, a general knowledge of the world, and a reasonable but not too inveterately decided preference for his own will and judgment over those of interested people,—these natural attributes and moderate acquirements will enable a consul to perform many of his duties respectably, but not to dispense with a great variety of other qualifications, only attainable by long experience. Yet, I think, few consuls are so well accomplished. An appointment of whatever grade, in the diplomatic or consular service of America, is too often what the English call a "job"; that is to say, it is made on private and personal grounds, without a paramount eye to the public good or the gentleman's especial fitness for the position. It is not too much to say (of course allowing for a brilliant exception here and there), that an American never is thoroughly qualified for a foreign post, nor has time to make himself so, before the revolution of the political wheel discards him from his office. Our country wrongs itself by permitting such a system of unsuitable appointments, and, still more, of removals for no cause, just when the incumbent might be beginning to ripen into usefulness. Mere ignorance of official detail is of comparatively small moment; though it is considered indispensable, I presume, that a man in any private capacity shall be thoroughly acquainted with the machinery and operation of his business, and shall not necessarily lose his position on having attained such knowledge. But there are so many more important things to be thought of, in the qualifications of a foreign resident, that his technical dexterity or clumsiness is hardly worth mentioning.

A good amount of common sense, some familiarity with U.S. laws, insight into human nature, management skills, general world knowledge, and a reasonable but not overly stubborn preference for his own opinions over those of interested parties—these natural traits and moderate skills will allow a consul to manage many of his duties respectably, but they cannot replace the wide range of other qualifications that can only be gained through extensive experience. Still, I believe few consuls are that well-rounded. Appointments, no matter the level, in America's diplomatic or consular services are often what the English call a "job"; that is to say, they are made based on personal connections rather than with a focus on the public interest or the individual’s actual suitability for the role. It’s fair to say (with some exceptions) that an American is never fully qualified for an overseas position, nor does he have the time to become so before the political tides carry him away from his role. Our country undermines itself by allowing such a system of inappropriate appointments and, even worse, dismissals without cause, especially right when the person might be starting to become effective. Simple ignorance of official procedures is relatively minor; while it's expected that someone in any private role should thoroughly understand the workings of their job and shouldn't lose their position for gaining such knowledge. However, there are many more significant qualifications to consider for someone living abroad, so their technical skills—good or bad—barely matter.

One great part of a consul's duty, for example, should consist in building up for himself a recognized position in the society where he resides, so that his local influence might be felt in behalf of his own country, and, so far as they are compatible (as they generally are to the utmost extent), for the interests of both nations. The foreign city should know that it has a permanent inhabitant and a hearty well-wisher in him. There are many conjunctures (and one of them is now upon us) where a long-established, honored, and trusted American citizen, holding a public position under our government in such a town as Liverpool, might go far towards swaying and directing the sympathies of the inhabitants. He might throw his own weight into the balance against mischief makers; he might have set his foot on the first little spark of malignant purpose, which the next wind may blow into a national war. But we wilfully give up all advantages of this kind. The position is totally beyond the attainment of an American; there to-day, bristling all over with the porcupine quills of our Republic, and gone to-morrow, just as he is becoming sensible of the broader and more generous patriotism which might almost amalgamate with that of England, without losing an atom of its native force and flavor. In the changes that appear to await us, and some of which, at least, can hardly fail to be for good, let us hope for a reform in this matter.

One important part of a consul's job, for instance, should be to establish a respected role in the community where he lives, so that his influence can benefit his own country and, as much as possible (which is usually to the fullest extent), serve the interests of both nations. The foreign city should recognize that it has a permanent resident and a genuine supporter in him. There are many situations (and one of them is happening now) where a long-standing, respected, and trusted American citizen in a public position, like in a city such as Liverpool, could significantly influence the feelings of the locals. He could counteract troublemakers; he might have been able to snuff out the first hint of malicious intent before it turns into a national conflict. But we willingly give up all such advantages. This position is completely unattainable for an American; here today, surrounded by the defenses of our Republic, and gone tomorrow, just as he starts to appreciate the broader and more generous patriotism that could almost blend with that of England without losing any of its original strength and essence. In the changes that seem to be ahead of us, and some of which are likely to be positive, let’s hope for improvement in this area.

For myself, as the gentle reader would spare me the trouble of saying, I was not at all the kind of man to grow into such an ideal Consul as I have here suggested. I never in my life desired to be burdened with public influence. I disliked my office from the first, and never came into any good accordance with it. Its dignity, so far as it had any, was an encumbrance; the attentions it drew upon me (such as invitations to Mayor's banquets and public celebrations of all kinds, where, to my horror, I found myself expected to stand up and speak) were—as I may say without incivility or ingratitude, because there is nothing personal in that sort of hospitality—a bore. The official business was irksome, and often painful. There was nothing pleasant about the whole affair, except the emoluments; and even those, never too bountifully reaped, were diminished by more than half in the second or third year of my incumbency. All this being true, I was quite prepared, in advance of the inauguration of Mr. Buchanan, to send in my resignation. When my successor arrived, I drew the long, delightful breath which first made me thoroughly sensible what an unnatural life I had been leading, and compelled me to admire myself for having battled with it so sturdily. The newcomer proved to be a very genial and agreeable gentleman, an F. F. V., and, as he pleasantly acknowledged, a Southern Fire Eater, —an announcement to which I responded, with similar good-humor and self-complacency, by parading my descent from an ancient line of Massachusetts Puritans. Since our brief acquaintanceship, my fire-eating friend has had ample opportunities to banquet on his favorite diet, hot and hot, in the Confederate service. For myself, as soon as I was out of office, the retrospect began to look unreal. I could scarcely believe that it was I,—that figure whom they called a Consul,—but a sort of Double Ganger, who had been permitted to assume my aspect, under which he went through his shadowy duties with a tolerable show of efficiency, while my real self had lain, as regarded my proper mode of being and acting, in a state of suspended animation.

For me, as any kind reader would understand, I was definitely not the type of person to become the ideal Consul I've just described. I never wanted the responsibility of public influence. I disliked my position from the start and never got used to it. The supposed dignity it held only felt like a burden; the attention it brought me (like invites to Mayor's banquets and public events where, to my horror, I was expected to stand and speak) was, if I may say without being rude or ungrateful—because there was nothing personal in that kind of hospitality—a drag. The official duties were annoying and often painful. There was nothing enjoyable about the whole situation, except for the pay; and even that, which was never all that generous, was cut by more than half in my second or third year on the job. Given all this, I was fully prepared to resign even before Mr. Buchanan was inaugurated. When my replacement arrived, I took a long, satisfying breath that made me realize how unnatural my life had been, and I couldn't help but admire myself for handling it so well. The new guy turned out to be a very friendly and pleasant gentleman, a Virginia native, and, as he cheerfully admitted, a Southern Fire Eater. I responded in kind, sharing my own background as a descendant of old Massachusetts Puritans. Since our brief meeting, my fire-eating friend has had plenty of chances to enjoy his favorite spicy lifestyle in the Confederate service. As for me, once I was out of office, the whole experience started to feel surreal. I could hardly believe I was the one— that figure they called a Consul— it felt like a sort of Doppelgänger had taken on my appearance, going through his vague responsibilities with a decent level of efficiency, while my true self lingered in a state of suspended animation regarding how I should live and act.

The same sense of illusion still pursues me. There is some mistake in this matter. I have been writing about another man's consular experiences, with which, through some mysterious medium of transmitted ideas, I find myself intimately acquainted, but in which I cannot possibly have had a personal interest. Is it not a dream altogether? The figure of that poor Doctor of Divinity looks wonderfully lifelike; so do those of the Oriental adventurer with the visionary coronet above his brow, and the moonstruck visitor of the Queen, and the poor old wanderer, seeking his native country through English highways and by-ways for almost thirty years; and so would a hundred others that I might summon up with similar distinctness. But were they more than shadows? Surely, I think not. Nor are these present pages a bit of intrusive autobiography. Let not the reader wrong me by supposing it. I never should have written with half such unreserve, had it been a portion of this life congenial with my nature, which I am living now, instead of a series of incidents and characters entirely apart from my own concerns, and on which the qualities personally proper to me could have had no bearing. Almost the only real incidents, as I see them now, were the visits of a young English friend, a scholar and a literary amateur, between whom and myself there sprung up an affectionate, and, I trust, not transitory regard. He used to come and sit or stand by my fireside, talking vivaciously and eloquently with me about literature and life, his own national characteristics and mine, with such kindly endurance of the many rough republicanisms wherewith I assailed him, and such frank and amiable assertion of all sorts of English prejudices and mistakes, that I understood his countrymen infinitely the better for him, and was almost prepared to love the intensest Englishman of them all, for his sake. It would gratify my cherished remembrance of this dear friend, if I could manage, without offending him, or letting the public know it, to introduce his name upon my page. Bright was the illumination of my dusky little apartment, as often as he made his appearance there!

The same feeling of illusion still follows me. There's something off about this whole situation. I've been writing about another person's experiences as a consul, which, through some mysterious way of shared ideas, I feel deeply connected to, even though I can't have any personal stake in them. Is this all just a dream? The image of that poor Doctor of Divinity looks incredibly real; so do the figures of the Eastern adventurer with the visionary crown on his head, the starry-eyed visitor to the Queen, and the old wanderer searching for his homeland through English roads and paths for nearly thirty years; and I could easily conjure a hundred others just as vividly. But were they more than mere shadows? Surely not. These pages aren’t an unwelcome autobiography. Please don’t mistake me for that. I would never have written with such openness if I were talking about my current life, which suits my nature, instead of a series of events and people completely unrelated to my own life, where my personal traits couldn’t possibly apply. The only real events, as I see them now, were the visits from a young English friend, a scholar and literary enthusiast, with whom I developed a warm, and I hope lasting, friendship. He would come and sit or stand by my fireplace, chatting energetically and eloquently with me about literature and life, discussing our national traits, and he graciously tolerated the many rough republican comments I threw at him, while also genuinely and kindly defending various English biases and misconceptions. Because of him, I came to understand his countrymen much better and was almost ready to love the most intense Englishman for his sake. It would mean a lot to me to honor this dear friend by mentioning his name here without upsetting him or revealing it to the public. My little dim room was always brightened whenever he came to visit!

The English sketches which I have been offering to the public comprise a few of the more external and therefore more readily manageable things that I took note of, in many escapes from the imprisonment of my consular servitude. Liverpool, though not very delightful as a place of residence, is a most convenient and admirable point to get away from. London is only five hours off by the fast train. Chester, the most curious town in England, with its encompassing wall, its ancient rows, and its venerable cathedral, is close at hand. North Wales, with all its hills and ponds, its noble sea-scenery, its multitude of gray castles and strange old villages, may be glanced at in a summer day or two. The lakes and mountains of Cumberland and Westmoreland may be reached before dinner-time. The haunted and legendary Isle of Man, a little kingdom by itself, lies within the scope of an afternoon's voyage. Edinburgh or Glasgow are attainable over night, and Loch Lomond betimes in the morning. Visiting these famous localities, and a great many others, I hope that I do not compromise my American patriotism by acknowledging that I was often conscious of a fervent hereditary attachment to the native soil of our forefathers, and felt it to be our own Old Home.

The English sketches I’ve been sharing with the public cover a few of the more visible and therefore easier to manage things I noticed during my many escapes from my consular duties. Liverpool, while not the most delightful place to live, is an extremely convenient and excellent spot to leave from. London is just five hours away by fast train. Chester, the most fascinating town in England, with its towering walls, ancient rows, and historic cathedral, is nearby. North Wales, with its hills and lakes, stunning coastal views, numerous gray castles, and quirky old villages, can be explored in a day or two during the summer. The lakes and mountains of Cumberland and Westmoreland can be reached before dinner. The haunted and storied Isle of Man, a little kingdom unto itself, is just a short afternoon boat ride away. Edinburgh or Glasgow can be reached overnight, and Loch Lomond can be visited early in the morning. While exploring these well-known places, I hope I don’t compromise my American patriotism by admitting that I often felt a deep-rooted hereditary connection to the land of our ancestors and viewed it as our own Old Home.





LEAMINGTON SPA.

In the course of several visits and stays of considerable length we acquired a homelike feeling towards Leamington, and came back thither again and again, chiefly because we had been there before. Wandering and wayside people, such as we had long since become, retain a few of the instincts that belong to a more settled way of life, and often prefer familiar and commonplace objects (for the very reason that they are so) to the dreary strangeness of scenes that might be thought much better worth the seeing. There is a small nest of a place in Leamington—at No. 10, Lansdowne Circus—upon which, to this day, my reminiscences are apt to settle as one of the coziest nooks in England or in the world; not that it had any special charm of its own, but only that we stayed long enough to know it well, and even to grow a little tired of it. In my opinion, the very tediousness of home and friends makes a part of what we love them for; if it be not mixed in sufficiently with the other elements of life, there may be mad enjoyment, but no happiness.

During several visits and extended stays, we developed a sense of belonging in Leamington and returned there again and again, mostly because we had been there before. As wanderers and people who have long since adapted to a transient lifestyle, we keep a few instincts of a more settled life and often prefer familiar and ordinary things—precisely because they are familiar—to the dull strangeness of places that might seem more interesting to explore. There’s a small cozy place in Leamington—at No. 10, Lansdowne Circus—where my memories often linger as one of the coziest spots in England or anywhere in the world; not because it had any unique charm, but simply because we stayed long enough to know it well, and even to become slightly tired of it. I believe that the very monotony of home and friends is part of what we love about them; if it doesn’t mix well with other aspects of life, there may be wild enjoyment, but no true happiness.

The modest abode to which I have alluded forms one of a circular range of pretty, moderate-sized, two-story houses, all built on nearly the same plan, and each provided with its little grass-plot, its flowers, its tufts of box trimmed into globes and other fantastic shapes, and its verdant hedges shutting the house in from the common drive and dividing it from its equally cosey neighbors. Coming out of the door, and taking a turn round the circle of sister-dwellings, it is difficult to find your way back by any distinguishing individuality of your own habitation. In the centre of the Circus is a space fenced in with iron railing, a small play-place and sylvan retreat for the children of the precinct, permeated by brief paths through the fresh English grass, and shadowed by various shrubbery; amid which, if you like, you may fancy yourself in a deep seclusion, though probably the mark of eye-shot from the windows of all the surrounding houses. But, in truth, with regard to the rest of the town and the world at large, all abode here is a genuine seclusion; for the ordinary stream of life does not run through this little, quiet pool, and few or none of the inhabitants seem to be troubled with any business or outside activities. I used to set them down as half-pay officers, dowagers of narrow income, elderly maiden ladies, and other people of respectability, but small account, such as hang on the world's skirts rather than actually belong to it. The quiet of the place was seldom disturbed, except by the grocer and butcher, who came to receive orders, or by the cabs, hackney-coaches, and Bath-chairs, in which the ladies took an infrequent airing, or the livery-steed which the retired captain sometimes bestrode for a morning ride, or by the red-coated postman who went his rounds twice a day to deliver letters, and again in the evening, ringing a hand-bell, to take letters for the mail. In merely mentioning these slight interruptions of its sluggish stillness, I seem to myself to disturb too much the atmosphere of quiet that brooded over the spot; whereas its impression upon me was, that the world had never found the way hither, or had forgotten it, and that the fortunate inhabitants were the only ones who possessed the spell-word of admittance. Nothing could have suited me better, at the time; for I had been holding a position of public servitude, which imposed upon me (among a great many lighter duties) the ponderous necessity of being universally civil and sociable.

The modest home I mentioned is part of a circular arrangement of charming, medium-sized, two-story houses, all designed in a similar style and each featuring its own little grass plot, flowers, trimmed box hedges shaped into globes and other whimsical forms, and green hedges separating the house from the common driveway and keeping it apart from its equally cozy neighbors. Stepping out the door and strolling around the circle of these neighboring homes, it’s hard to find your way back based on any unique characteristics of your own place. In the center of the circle is a space surrounded by an iron railing, a small playground and peaceful retreat for the local children, with short paths weaving through the fresh English grass and shaded by various shrubs; among which, if you like, you could imagine yourself in a deep hideaway, even though you’d probably still be within sight of all the surrounding houses. But honestly, in relation to the rest of the town and the outside world, living here feels like real seclusion; the usual flow of life doesn’t pass through this little, quiet area, and very few, if any, of the residents seem bothered by any jobs or outside activities. I used to think of them as retired officers, older women with modest incomes, elderly single women, and other respectable but not particularly important people who linger on the fringes of society rather than truly belonging to it. The tranquility of the place was rarely disturbed, except for visits from the grocer and butcher who came to take orders, or by the occasional cab, hackney coach, and Bath chair that the ladies used for a rare outing, or the retired captain who sometimes rode his horse for a morning ride, or the red-coated postman who made his rounds twice a day to deliver mail and again in the evening, ringing a hand bell to collect letters. By simply mentioning these minor disruptions to its lazy stillness, I feel like I'm disturbing too much the calm atmosphere that enveloped the area; my impression was that the world had never found its way here or had forgotten it, and that the lucky residents were the only ones with the special word to gain entry. Nothing could have suited me better at the time; I had been in a public service role that required me, alongside a lot of lighter responsibilities, to be uniformly polite and social.

Nevertheless, if a man were seeking the bustle of society, he might find it more readily in Leamington than in most other English towns. It is a permanent watering-place, a sort of institution to which I do not know any close parallel in American life: for such places as Saratoga bloom only for the summer-season, and offer a thousand dissimilitudes even then; while Leamington seems to be always in flower, and serves as a home to the homeless all the year round. Its original nucleus, the plausible excuse for the town's coming into prosperous existence, lies in the fiction of a chalybeate well, which, indeed, is so far a reality that out of its magical depths have gushed streets, groves, gardens, mansions, shops, and churches, and spread themselves along the banks of the little river Leam. This miracle accomplished, the beneficent fountain has retired beneath a pump-room, and appears to have given up all pretensions to the remedial virtues formerly attributed to it. I know not whether its waters are ever tasted nowadays; but not the less does Leamington—in pleasant Warwickshire, at the very midmost point of England, in a good hunting neighborhood, and surrounded by country-seats and castles— continue to be a resort of transient visitors, and the more permanent abode of a class of genteel, unoccupied, well-to-do, but not very wealthy people, such as are hardly known among ourselves. Persons who have no country-houses, and whose fortunes are inadequate to a London expenditure, find here, I suppose, a sort of town and country life in one.

Nevertheless, if a man were looking for the excitement of society, he might find it more easily in Leamington than in most other English towns. It is a permanent resort, a kind of institution that doesn’t have a close equivalent in American life; places like Saratoga thrive only during the summer season and vary significantly even then, while Leamington seems to be always in bloom and provides a home for the homeless year-round. Its original reason for establishing a prosperous community is based on the existence of a so-called chalybeate well, which is real enough that from its magical depths have sprung up streets, groves, gardens, mansions, shops, and churches, lining the banks of the little river Leam. Once this transformation happened, the beneficial fountain has retreated beneath a pump-room and seems to have abandoned all claims to the healing properties it once had. I’m not sure if anyone drinks its water these days; nevertheless, Leamington—in the lovely Warwickshire, right in the center of England, in a good hunting area, and surrounded by country estates and castles—remains a destination for temporary visitors and the more permanent home for a class of genteel, idle, well-off, but not overly wealthy people, who are not really known among ourselves. Those who don’t have country homes and whose finances don’t allow for a London lifestyle find here, I guess, a blend of town and country living.

In its present aspect the town is of no great age. In contrast with the antiquity of many places in its neighborhood, it has a bright, new face, and seems almost to smile even amid the sombreness of an English autumn. Nevertheless, it is hundreds upon hundreds of years old, if we reckon up that sleepy lapse of time during which it existed as a small village of thatched houses, clustered round a priory; and it would still have been precisely such a rural village, but for a certain Dr. Jephson, who lived within the memory of man, and who found out the magic well, and foresaw what fairy wealth might be made to flow from it. A public garden has been laid out along the margin of the Leam, and called the Jephson Garden, in honor of him who created the prosperity of his native spot. A little way within the garden-gate there is a circular temple of Grecian architecture, beneath the dome of which stands a marble statue of the good Doctor, very well executed, and representing him with a face of fussy activity and benevolence: just the kind of man, if luck favored him, to build up the fortunes of those about him, or, quite as probably, to blight his whole neighborhood by some disastrous speculation.

In its current form, the town isn’t very old. Compared to the ancient places nearby, it has a bright, new appearance and almost seems to smile even in the grayness of an English autumn. Still, it’s been around for hundreds of years if you consider the long stretch of time it spent as a small village with thatched houses clustered around a priory. It would have remained just that kind of rural village if not for a certain Dr. Jephson, who lived not too long ago and discovered the magical well, anticipating the prosperity that could flow from it. A public garden has been created along the edge of the Leam, named Jephson Garden in honor of the man who brought prosperity to his hometown. A short walk inside the garden gate leads to a circular temple in Grecian style, under a dome where a marble statue of the good Doctor stands, expertly crafted and depicting him with a face full of bustling energy and kindness: just the sort of person, if luck was on his side, to help those around him thrive or, just as likely, to bring disaster to his entire community through a failed investment.

The Jephson Garden is very beautiful, like most other English pleasure-grounds; for, aided by their moist climate and not too fervid sun, the landscape-gardeners excel in converting flat or tame surfaces into attractive scenery, chiefly through the skilful arrangement of trees and shrubbery. An Englishman aims at this effect even in the little patches under the windows of a suburban villa, and achieves it on a larger scale in a tract of many acres. The Garden is shadowed with trees of a fine growth, standing alone, or in dusky groves and dense entanglements, pervaded by woodland paths; and emerging from these pleasant glooms, we come upon a breadth of sunshine, where the greensward—so vividly green that it has a kind of lustre in it—is spotted with beds of gemlike flowers. Rustic chairs and benches are scattered about, some of them ponderously fashioned out of the stumps of obtruncated trees, and others more artfully made with intertwining branches, or perhaps an imitation of such frail handiwork in iron. In a central part of the Garden is an archery-ground, where laughing maidens practise at the butts, generally missing their ostensible mark, but, by the mere grace of their action, sending an unseen shaft into some young man's heart. There is space, moreover, within these precincts, for an artificial lake, with a little green island in the midst of it; both lake and island being the haunt of swans, whose aspect and movement in the water are most beautiful and stately,—most infirm, disjointed, and decrepit, when, unadvisedly, they see fit to emerge, and try to walk upon dry land. In the latter case, they look like a breed of uncommonly ill-contrived geese; and I record the matter here for the sake of the moral,—that we should never pass judgment on the merits of any person or thing, unless we behold them in the sphere and circumstances to which they are specially adapted. In still another part of the Garden there is a labyrinthine maze, formed of an intricacy of hedge-bordered walks, involving himself in which, a man might wander for hours inextricably within a circuit of only a few yards. It seemed to me a sad emblem of the mental and moral perplexities in which we sometimes go astray, petty in scope, yet large enough to entangle a lifetime, and bewilder us with a weary movement, but no genuine progress.

The Jephson Garden is incredibly beautiful, like most other English parks. Thanks to the moist climate and mild sun, landscape gardeners excel at transforming flat or dull areas into stunning scenery, mainly through the clever arrangement of trees and shrubs. An Englishman aims for this effect even in the small patches under the windows of suburban homes and achieves it on a larger scale over many acres. The Garden is shaded by tall trees, either standing alone or grouped in dark groves and thick thickets, along woodland paths. As we leave these pleasant shadows, we find a sunny area where the grass—so bright green that it shines—features beds of jewel-like flowers. Rustic chairs and benches are scattered throughout, some solidly built from tree stumps, while others are crafted more artfully from intertwining branches or perhaps designed to mimic that delicate handiwork in iron. In the center of the Garden is an archery range, where laughing young women practice shooting at targets, often missing their intended mark, but with the grace of their movements, they send an unseen arrow straight to some young man's heart. There’s also space for an artificial lake with a little green island in the middle; both the lake and the island are home to swans, whose appearance and movement in the water are stunning and graceful—but they can look quite awkward, feeble, and clumsy when they decide to come ashore. In that case, they resemble a poorly constructed breed of geese, and I mention this to make a point—that we should never judge the worth of any person or thing without seeing them in the environment and circumstances for which they are suited. Another area of the Garden features a maze, created from a complex network of hedge-lined paths, where a person might wander for hours, completely lost within a very small area. It struck me as a poignant symbol of the mental and moral complexities that can lead us astray—small in scale yet large enough to entangle a lifetime, leaving us with weary movement but no real progress.

The Leam,—the "high complectioned Leam," as Drayton calls it,—after drowsing across the principal street of the town beneath a handsome bridge, skirts along the margin of the Garden without any perceptible flow. Heretofore I had fancied the Concord the laziest river in the world, but now assign that amiable distinction to the little English stream. Its water is by no means transparent, but has a greenish, goose-puddly hue, which, however, accords well with the other coloring and characteristics of the scene, and is disagreeable neither to sight nor smell. Certainly, this river is a perfect feature of that gentle picturesqueness in which England is so rich, sleeping, as it does, beneath a margin of willows that droop into its bosom, and other trees, of deeper verdure than our own country can boast, inclining lovingly over it. On the Garden-side it is bordered by a shadowy, secluded grove, with winding paths among its boskiness, affording many a peep at the river's imperceptible lapse and tranquil gleam; and on the opposite shore stands the priory-church, with its churchyard full of shrubbery and tombstones.

The Leam—referred to as the "high complected Leam" by Drayton—meanders across the main street of the town beneath a beautiful bridge, running along the edge of the Garden with barely any visible flow. Until now, I thought the Concord was the laziest river in the world, but I now give that title to this little English stream. Its water isn't very clear; it has a greenish, muddy color, but this actually fits well with the overall colors and characteristics of the scene and isn't unpleasant to either the eye or the nose. This river truly adds to the gentle charm that England is known for, gently lying below a fringe of willows that lean into its waters, along with other trees, greener than any in my country, that lean affectionately over it. On the Garden side, it's lined by a shaded, secluded grove with winding paths that provide glimpses of the river's subtle flow and tranquil shine; and on the other side stands the priory church, surrounded by a churchyard filled with shrubs and gravestones.

The business portion of the town clusters about the banks of the Leam, and is naturally densest around the well to which the modern settlement owes its existence. Here are the commercial inns, the post-office, the furniture-dealers, the iron-mongers, and all the heavy and homely establishments that connect themselves even with the airiest modes of human life; while upward from the river, by a long and gentle ascent, rises the principal street, which is very bright and cheerful in its physiognomy, and adorned with shop-fronts almost as splendid as those of London, though on a diminutive scale. There are likewise side-streets and cross-streets, many of which are bordered with the beautiful Warwickshire elm, a most unusual kind of adornment for an English town; and spacious avenues, wide enough to afford room for stately groves, with foot-paths running beneath the lofty shade, and rooks cawing and chattering so high in the tree-tops that their voices get musical before reaching the earth. The houses are mostly built in blocks and ranges, in which every separate tenement is a repetition of its fellow, though the architecture of the different ranges is sufficiently various. Some of them are almost palatial in size and sumptuousness of arrangement. Then, on the outskirts of the town, there are detached villas, enclosed within that separate domain of high stone fence and embowered shrubbery which an Englishman so loves to build and plant around his abode, presenting to the public only an iron gate, with a gravelled carriage-drive winding away towards the half-hidden mansion. Whether in street or suburb, Leamington may fairly be called beautiful, and, at some points, magnificent; but by and by you become doubtfully suspicious of a somewhat unreal finery: it is pretentious, though not glaringly so; it has been built with malice aforethought, as a place of gentility and enjoyment. Moreover, splendid as the houses look, and comfortable as they often are, there is a nameless something about them, betokening that they have not grown out of human hearts, but are the creations of a skilfully applied human intellect: no man has reared any one of them, whether stately or humble, to be his lifelong residence, wherein to bring up his children, who are to inherit it as a home. They are nicely contrived lodging-houses, one and all,—the best as well as the shabbiest of them, —and therefore inevitably lack some nameless property that a home should have. This was the case with our own little snuggery in Lansdowne Circus, as with all the rest; it had not grown out of anybody's individual need, but was built to let or sell, and was therefore like a ready-made garment,—a tolerable fit, but only tolerable.

The business area of the town is centered around the banks of the Leam, and it's most concentrated around the well that gave rise to the modern settlement. Here you'll find the commercial inns, the post office, furniture stores, ironmongers, and all the essential establishments that tie into even the simplest aspects of daily life. Up from the river, a long and gentle slope leads to the main street, which is bright and cheerful in appearance, decorated with shop fronts almost as magnificent as those in London, though on a smaller scale. There are also side streets and cross streets, many lined with the beautiful Warwickshire elm, a rather unusual decoration for an English town; and spacious avenues wide enough for impressive groves, with footpaths running beneath the tall shade, and rooks cawing and chatting so high in the tree tops that their voices sound musical before they reach the ground. The houses are mostly built in blocks and rows, where each individual unit is a copy of the next, although the architecture of the different blocks varies enough. Some are almost palatial in size and lavishness of design. On the outskirts of the town, there are detached villas, surrounded by high stone walls and lush shrubbery, which an Englishman loves to create around his home, presenting only an iron gate to the public, with a gravel driveway winding away towards the semi-hidden mansion. Whether in the streets or suburbs, Leamington could be called beautiful, and in some spots, magnificent; but over time, you might become suspicious of a certain artificial elegance: it feels pretentious, though not overly so; it seems constructed with the intention of being a place of sophistication and pleasure. Moreover, as splendid as the houses appear and as comfortable as they often are, there’s an indescribable quality about them that suggests they haven’t sprung from genuine human needs but are the products of skillful planning: no one has built any of them, whether grand or modest, to be their lifelong home, meant to raise children who will inherit it as a family dwelling. They are all cleverly designed rental properties—the best as well as the worst of them—therefore inevitably lacking some indefinable quality that constitutes a true home. This was also true of our little cozy spot in Lansdowne Circus, like all the others; it hadn’t emerged from anyone’s personal necessity but was built to rent or sell, making it feel like a ready-made outfit—an okay fit, but just okay.

All these blocks, ranges, and detached villas are adorned with the finest and most aristocratic manes that I have found anywhere in England, except, perhaps, in Bath, which is the great metropolis of that second-class gentility with which watering-places are chiefly populated. Lansdowne Crescent, Lansdowne Circus, Lansdowne Terrace, Regent Street, Warwick Street, Clarendon Street, the Upper and Lower Parade: such are a few of the designations. Parade, indeed, is a well-chosen name for the principal street, along which the population of the idle town draws itself out for daily review and display. I only wish that my descriptive powers would enable me to throw off a picture of the scene at a sunny noontide, individualizing each character with a touch the great people alighting from their carriages at the principal shop-doors; the elderly ladies and infirm Indian officers drawn along in Bath-chairs; the comely, rather than pretty, English girls, with their deep, healthy bloom, which an American taste is apt to deem fitter for a milkmaid than for a lady; the mustached gentlemen with frogged surtouts and a military air; the nursemaids and chubby children, but no chubbier than our own, and scampering on slenderer legs; the sturdy figure of John Bull in all varieties and of all ages, but ever with the stamp of authenticity somewhere about him.

All these blocks, ranges, and detached villas are filled with the finest and most aristocratic people I've seen anywhere in England, except maybe in Bath, which is the main hub for that second-class gentility that primarily populates resort towns. Lansdowne Crescent, Lansdowne Circus, Lansdowne Terrace, Regent Street, Warwick Street, Clarendon Street, the Upper and Lower Parade: these are just a few of the names. "Parade" is truly a fitting name for the main street, where the town's idle locals come out each day to show off and be seen. I really wish my descriptive skills were strong enough to paint a picture of the scene at sunny noon, highlighting each character—the high-society folks getting out of their carriages at the main shops; elderly ladies and frail Indian officers in Bath chairs; the attractive, rather than traditionally pretty, English girls with their vibrant, healthy complexions that American tastes might think are more suited for a milkmaid than a lady; the mustached gentlemen in frogged coats with a military vibe; the nannies with plump kids, just as chubby as our own, but running on slimmer legs; the robust figure of John Bull in all shapes and ages, but always with an air of authenticity about him.

To say the truth, I have been holding the pen over my paper, purposing to write a descriptive paragraph or two about the throng on the principal Parade of Leamington, so arranging it as to present a sketch of the British out-of-door aspect on a morning walk of gentility; but I find no personages quite sufficiently distinct and individual in my memory to supply the materials of such a panorama.

To be honest, I've been sitting here with my pen over my paper, planning to write a couple of descriptive paragraphs about the crowd on the main Parade in Leamington, trying to create a picture of the British outdoor scene during a morning stroll of the upper class. However, I can't seem to recall any individuals who stand out clearly enough in my memory to provide the details for such a scene.

Oddly enough, the only figure that comes fairly forth to my mind's eye is that of a dowager, one of hundreds whom I used to marvel at, all over England, but who have scarcely a representative among our own ladies of autumnal life, so thin, careworn, and frail, as age usually makes the latter.

Strangely, the only image that really pops into my head is of a dowager, one of the many I used to admire across England, but who barely has a counterpart among our older ladies today, who tend to be so thin, worn out, and fragile, which is typical as age sets in.

I have heard a good deal of the tenacity with which English ladies retain their personal beauty to a late period of life; but (not to suggest that an American eye needs use and cultivation before it can quite appreciate the charm of English beauty at any age) it strikes me that an English lady of fifty is apt to become a creature less refined and delicate, so far as her physique goes, than anything that we Western people class under the name of woman. She has an awful ponderosity of frame, not pulpy, like the looser development of our few fat women, but massive with solid beef and streaky tallow; so that (though struggling manfully against the idea) you inevitably think of her as made up of steaks and sirloins. When she walks, her advance is elephantine. When she sits down, it is on a great round space of her Maker's footstool, where she looks as if nothing could ever move her. She imposes awe and respect by the muchness of her personality, to such a degree that you probably credit her with far greater moral and intellectual force than she can fairly claim. Her visage is usually grim and stern, seldom positively forbidding, yet calmly terrible, not merely by its breadth and weight of feature, but because it seems to express so much well-founded self-reliance, such acquaintance with the world, its toils, troubles, and dangers, and such sturdy capacity for trampling down a foe. Without anything positively salient, or actively offensive, or, indeed, unjustly formidable to her neighbors, she has the effect of a seventy-four gun-ship in time of peace; for, while you assure yourself that there is no real danger, you cannot help thinking how tremendous would be her onset, if pugnaciously inclined, and how futile the effort to inflict any counter-injury. She certainly looks tenfold—nay, a hundred-fold—better able to take care of herself than our slender-framed and haggard womankind; but I have not found reason to suppose that the English dowager of fifty has actually greater courage, fortitude, and strength of character than our women of similar age, or even a tougher physical endurance than they. Morally, she is strong, I suspect, only in society, and in the common routine of social affairs, and would be found powerless and timid in any exceptional strait that might call for energy outside of the conventionalities amid which she has grown up.

I’ve heard a lot about how English women maintain their beauty into older age; however, (not to imply that an American eye doesn’t need some adjustment to fully appreciate the appeal of English beauty at any stage) it seems to me that an English woman at fifty tends to become less refined and delicate physically compared to what we Westerners consider a woman. She has a heavy build, not soft like our few overweight women, but solid with substantial flesh and fat; so that (despite trying hard to resist the thought) you can’t help but picture her as being made of cuts of meat. When she walks, it’s a lumbering gait. When she sits down, she takes a large space and looks like nothing could ever move her. She commands awe and respect due to the fullness of her presence, leading you to believe she possesses much greater moral and intellectual strength than she actually does. Her face is usually stern and serious, rarely outright forbidding, yet carries a calm intensity, not just because of the broad and heavy features, but also because it seems to reflect a deep self-reliance, familiarity with the world and its challenges, and a strong ability to confront an opponent. Without anything overly striking, or overtly threatening, she gives off the vibe of a powerful warship at peace; for, while you reassure yourself that she’s not truly dangerous, you can’t help but think how overwhelming her response might be if she were in a fighting mood, and how pointless any attempt to oppose her would be. She certainly appears much more capable of looking after herself than our thin and worn-out women; however, I have found no evidence that an English widow at fifty actually has more courage, resilience, or strength of character than our women of the same age, or even better physical endurance. Morally, I suspect she only feels strong when surrounded by society and in the usual course of social life, and would likely appear weak and fearful in any unusual situation that required energy outside of the norms in which she was raised.

You can meet this figure in the street, and live, and even smile at the recollection. But conceive of her in a ball-room, with the bare, brawny arms that she invariably displays there, and all the other corresponding development, such as is beautiful in the maiden blossom, but a spectacle to howl at in such an over-blown cabbage-rose as this.

You can run into this person on the street, and it's fine, and you might even smile at the memory. But imagine her in a ballroom, with those muscular arms she always shows off there, and all the other traits that are lovely in a young girl, but look ridiculous on someone as over-the-top as she is.

Yet, somewhere in this enormous bulk there must be hidden the modest, slender, violet-nature of a girl, whom an alien mass of earthliness has unkindly overgrown; for an English maiden in her teens, though very seldom so pretty as our own damsels, possesses, to say the truth, a certain charm of half-blossom, and delicately folded leaves, and tender womanhood shielded by maidenly reserves, with which, somehow or other, our American girls often fail to adorn themselves during an appreciable moment. It is a pity that the English violet should grow into such an outrageously developed peony as I have attempted to describe. I wonder whether a middle-aged husband ought to be considered as legally married to all the accretions that have overgrown the slenderness of his bride, since he led her to the altar, and which make her so much more than he ever bargained for! Is it not a sounder view of the case, that the matrimonial bond cannot be held to include the three fourths of the wife that had no existence when the ceremony was performed? And as a matter of conscience and good morals, ought not an English married pair to insist upon the celebration of a silver-wedding at the end of twenty-five years, in order to legalize and mutually appropriate that corporeal growth of which both parties have individually come into possession since they were pronounced one flesh?

Yet, somewhere in this massive figure, there must be hidden the modest, slender, violet-like nature of a girl, whom a thick mass of earthly attributes has unkindly covered; for an English girl in her teens, although rarely as pretty as our own ladies, has a certain charm of half-bloom, delicately folded petals, and tender womanhood protected by youthful modesty, which our American girls often manage to miss for quite some time. It’s a shame that the English violet should grow into such an outrageously developed peony as I have tried to describe. I wonder if a middle-aged husband should be considered legally married to all the extra layers that have concealed the slenderness of his bride since he brought her to the altar, which makes her so much more than he ever expected! Isn’t it a more reasonable view that the marriage bond shouldn’t include the three-fourths of the wife that didn’t exist when the ceremony took place? And, on matters of conscience and good ethics, shouldn’t an English married couple insist on celebrating a silver wedding after twenty-five years to legitimize and mutually acknowledge that physical changes they have both experienced since they were declared one flesh?

The chief enjoyment of my several visits to Leamington lay in rural walks about the neighborhood, and in jaunts to places of note and interest, which are particularly abundant in that region. The high-roads are made pleasant to the traveller by a border of trees, and often afford him the hospitality of a wayside bench beneath a comfortable shade. But a fresher delight is to be found in the foot-paths, which go wandering away from stile to stile, along hedges, and across broad fields, and through wooded parks, leading you to little hamlets of thatched cottages, ancient, solitary farm-houses, picturesque old mills, streamlets, pools, and all those quiet, secret, unexpected, yet strangely familiar features of English scenery that Tennyson shows us in his idyls and eclogues. These by-paths admit the wayfarer into the very heart of rural life, and yet do not burden him with a sense of intrusiveness. He has a right to go whithersoever they lead him; for, with all their shaded privacy, they are as much the property of the public as the dusty high-road itself, and even by an older tenure. Their antiquity probably exceeds that of the Roman ways; the footsteps of the aboriginal Britons first wore away the grass, and the natural flow of intercourse between village and village has kept the track bare ever since. An American farmer would plough across any such path, and obliterate it with his hills of potatoes and Indian corn; but here it is protected by law, and still more by the sacredness that inevitably springs up, in this soil, along the well-defined footprints of centuries. Old associations are sure to be fragrant herbs in English nostrils; we pull them up as weeds.

The main enjoyment of my various visits to Leamington came from rural walks around the area and trips to notable and interesting places, which are especially plentiful in that region. The main roads are made pleasant for travelers with a line of trees and often offer a welcoming bench under a nice shade. But a fresher joy is found on the footpaths, which meander from stile to stile, along hedges, across wide fields, and through wooded parks, leading you to small villages with thatched cottages, old, lonely farmhouses, charming old mills, streamlets, ponds, and all those quiet, hidden, unexpected, yet strangely familiar aspects of English scenery that Tennyson shows us in his poems. These by-paths take the traveler right into the heart of rural life without making him feel intrusive. He has the right to walk wherever they take him; after all, despite their shaded privacy, they belong to the public just as much as the dusty main road, and even by an older claim. Their age likely exceeds that of the Roman roads; the footsteps of the original Britons first wore away the grass, and the natural flow of traffic between villages has kept the path clear ever since. An American farmer would plow through any such path and cover it with hills of potatoes and corn; but here it’s protected by law, and even more by the sacredness that inevitably arises, in this land, along the well-defined paths of centuries. Old memories are sure to be cherished in English minds; we pull them up like weeds.

I remember such a path, the access to which is from Lovers' Grove, a range of tall old oaks and elms on a high hill-top, whence there is a view of Warwick Castle, and a wide extent of landscape, beautiful, though bedimmed with English mist. This particular foot-path, however, is not a remarkably good specimen of its kind, since it leads into no hollows and seclusions, and soon terminates in a high-road. It connects Leamington by a short cut with the small neighboring village of Lillington, a place which impresses an American observer with its many points of contrast to the rural aspects of his own country. The village consists chiefly of one row of contiguous dwellings, separated only by party-walls, but ill-matched among themselves, being of different heights, and apparently of various ages, though all are of an antiquity which we should call venerable. Some of the windows are leaden-framed lattices, opening on hinges. These houses are mostly built of gray stone; but others, in the same range, are of brick, and one or two are in a very old fashion,— Elizabethan, or still older,—having a ponderous framework of oak, painted black, and filled in with plastered stone or bricks. Judging by the patches of repair, the oak seems to be the more durable part of the structure. Some of the roofs are covered with earthen tiles; others (more decayed and poverty-stricken) with thatch, out of which sprouts a luxurious vegetation of grass, house-leeks, and yellow flowers. What especially strikes an American is the lack of that insulated space, the intervening gardens, grass-plots, orchards, broad-spreading shade-trees, which occur between our own village-houses. These English dwellings have no such separate surroundings; they all grow together, like the cells of a honeycomb.

I remember a path that starts from Lovers' Grove, a stretch of tall old oaks and elms on a high hilltop, where you can see Warwick Castle and a beautiful but misty English landscape. However, this particular footpath isn't one of the best since it doesn't lead into any secluded areas and quickly ends at a main road. It provides a shortcut from Leamington to the small nearby village of Lillington, a place that stands out to an American with its many contrasts to the rural scenes back home. The village primarily consists of a row of connected houses, only separated by shared walls, but they don’t match well since they vary in height and age, though they're all quite old by our standards. Some windows have lead-framed lattices that open on hinges. Most of the houses are made of gray stone, while others in the same row are made of brick, and a couple are very old-fashioned—Elizabethan or even older—with heavy black-painted oak frames filled with plaster or bricks. The patches of repair suggest that the oak is the more durable part of the structure. Some roofs are covered with clay tiles; others, more run-down and poor, have thatch with a flourishing growth of grass, house-leeks, and yellow flowers. What strikes an American most is the absence of separate spaces like gardens, lawns, orchards, and large shade trees that are common between the houses in our villages. These English homes are all connected, like the cells in a honeycomb.

Beyond the first row of houses, and hidden from it by a turn of the road, there was another row (or block, as we should call it) of small old cottages, stuck one against another, with their thatched roofs forming a single contiguity. These, I presume, were the habitations of the poorest order of rustic laborers; and the narrow precincts of each cottage, as well as the close neighborhood of the whole, gave the impression of a stifled, unhealthy atmosphere among the occupants. It seemed impossible that there should be a cleanly reserve, a proper self-respect among individuals, or a wholesome unfamiliarity between families where human life was crowded and massed into such intimate communities as these. Nevertheless, not to look beyond the outside, I never saw a prettier rural scene than was presented by this range of contiguous huts. For in front of the whole row was a luxuriant and well-trimmed hawthorn hedge, and belonging to each cottage was a little square of garden-ground, separated from its neighbors by a line of the same verdant fence. The gardens were chockfull, not of esculent vegetables, but of flowers, familiar ones, but very bright-colored, and shrubs of box, some of which were trimmed into artistic shapes; and I remember, before one door, a representation of Warwick Castle, made of oyster-shells. The cottagers evidently loved the little nests in which they dwelt, and did their best to make them beautiful, and succeeded more than tolerably well,—so kindly did nature help their humble efforts with its verdure, flowers, moss, lichens, and the green things that grew out of the thatch. Through some of the open doorways we saw plump children rolling about on the stone floors, and their mothers, by no means very pretty, but as happy-looking as mothers generally are; and while we gazed at these domestic matters, an old woman rushed wildly out of one of the gates, upholding a shovel, on which she clanged and clattered with a key. At first we fancied that she intended an onslaught against ourselves, but soon discovered that a more dangerous enemy was abroad; for the old lady's bees had swarmed, and the air was full of them, whizzing by our heads like bullets.

Beyond the first row of houses, and hidden from it by a bend in the road, there was another row (or block, as we would call it) of small old cottages, squeezed together with their thatched roofs forming a continuous line. These were likely the homes of the poorest rural workers, and the tight spaces around each cottage, along with the close proximity of the whole area, created an impression of a stifled, unhealthy atmosphere among the residents. It seemed impossible that there could be any sense of cleanliness, self-respect, or healthy distance between families when human life was packed so closely together. However, setting aside the outside appearance, I never saw a prettier rural scene than what this row of cottages presented. In front of the entire row was a lush, well-trimmed hawthorn hedge, and each cottage had a small garden plot, separated from the others by the same green fence. The gardens were filled not with edible vegetables, but with bright-colored flowers, familiar ones, along with box shrubs, some trimmed into artistic shapes; and I recall seeing, before one door, a decorative model of Warwick Castle made from oyster shells. The cottage residents clearly loved their little homes and did their best to make them beautiful, succeeding quite well—nature kindly supported their humble efforts with its greenery, flowers, moss, lichens, and the green things sprouting from the thatch. Through some of the open doorways, we saw chubby children rolling around on the stone floors, and their mothers, who were by no means very attractive, but looked as happy as mothers generally do; while we observed these everyday scenes, an old woman rushed out of one of the gates, wielding a shovel and clanging it with a key. At first, we thought she was coming after us, but we soon realized that a more dangerous foe was nearby; the old lady's bees had swarmed, and the air was filled with them, buzzing past our heads like bullets.

Not far from these two rows of houses and cottages, a green lane, overshadowed with trees, turned aside from the main road, and tended towards a square, gray tower, the battlements of which were just high enough to be visible above the foliage. Wending our way thitherward, we found the very picture and ideal of a country church and churchyard. The tower seemed to be of Norman architecture, low, massive, and crowned with battlements. The body of the church was of very modest dimensions, and the eaves so low that I could touch them with my walking-stick. We looked into the windows and beheld the dim and quiet interior, a narrow space, but venerable with the consecration of many centuries, and keeping its sanctity as entire and inviolate as that of a vast cathedral. The nave was divided from the side aisles of the church by pointed arches resting on very sturdy pillars: it was good to see how solemnly they held themselves to their age-long task of supporting that lowly roof. There was a small organ, suited in size to the vaulted hollow, which it weekly filled with religious sound. On the opposite wall of the church, between two windows, was a mural tablet of white marble, with an inscription in black letters,—the only such memorial that I could discern, although many dead people doubtless lay beneath the floor, and had paved it with their ancient tombstones, as is customary in old English churches. There were no modern painted windows, flaring with raw colors, nor other gorgeous adornments, such as the present taste for mediaeval restoration often patches upon the decorous simplicity of the gray village-church. It is probably the worshipping-place of no more distinguished a congregation than the farmers and peasantry who inhabit the houses and cottages which I have just described. Had the lord of the manor been one of the parishioners, there would have been an eminent pew near the chancel, walled high about, curtained, and softly cushioned, warmed by a fireplace of its own, and distinguished by hereditary tablets and escutcheons on the enclosed stone pillar.

Not far from these two rows of houses and cottages, a green lane shaded by trees veered off from the main road, leading toward a square, gray tower, the battlements of which peeked just above the foliage. As we made our way there, we discovered the perfect example of a country church and its graveyard. The tower appeared to be built in Norman style, low and sturdy, topped with battlements. The church itself was pretty small, with eaves so low that I could reach them with my walking stick. We peeked through the windows and saw the dim, tranquil interior, a narrow space that felt ancient with centuries of reverence, maintaining its sanctity as completely as a grand cathedral. The nave was separated from the side aisles by pointed arches resting on strong pillars, proudly continuing their age-old duty of holding up that humble roof. There was a small organ, just the right size for the vaulted space, filling it each week with religious music. On the opposite wall of the church, between two windows, was a white marble memorial tablet with an inscription in black letters—the only memorial I could see, even though many people likely lay beneath the floor, with their ancient tombstones paving it, as is common in old English churches. There were no modern stained glass windows bursting with bright colors, nor any other lavish decorations that today's medieval restoration trends often apply to the understated simplicity of a gray village church. It likely served a congregation made up of nothing more distinguished than the farmers and villagers living in the homes and cottages I just mentioned. If the lord of the manor had been one of the parishioners, there would have been a prominent pew near the chancel, enclosed with high walls, curtained, and comfortably cushioned, warmed by its own fireplace, and marked by family plaques and crests on the stone pillar surrounding it.

A well-trodden path led across the churchyard, and the gate being on the latch, we entered, and walked round among the graves and monuments. The latter were chiefly head-stones, none of which were very old, so far as was discoverable by the dates; some, indeed, in so ancient a cemetery, were disagreeably new, with inscriptions glittering like sunshine in gold letters. The ground must have been dug over and over again, innumerable times, until the soil is made up of what was once human clay, out of which have sprung successive crops of gravestones, that flourish their allotted time, and disappear, like the weeds and flowers in their briefer period. The English climate is very unfavorable to the endurance of memorials in the open air. Twenty years of it suffice to give as much antiquity of aspect, whether to tombstone or edifice, as a hundred years of our own drier atmosphere,—so soon do the drizzly rains and constant moisture corrode the surface of marble or freestone. Sculptured edges loose their sharpness in a year or two; yellow lichens overspread a beloved name, and obliterate it while it is yet fresh upon some survivor's heart. Time gnaws an English gravestone with wonderful appetite; and when the inscription is quite illegible, the sexton takes the useless slab away, and perhaps makes a hearthstone of it, and digs up the unripe bones which it ineffectually tried to memorialize, and gives the bed to another sleeper. In the Charter Street burial-ground at Salem, and in the old graveyard on the hill at Ipswich, I have seen more ancient gravestones, with legible inscriptions on them, than in any English churchyard.

A well-worn path led through the churchyard, and since the gate was unlatched, we went in and walked among the graves and monuments. Most of the monuments were headstones, none of which seemed very old from the dates we could see; some were surprisingly new for such an ancient cemetery, with inscriptions shining like sunshine in gold letters. The ground must have been dug up countless times, so the soil is made up of what was once human remains, from which successive crops of gravestones emerge, thriving for their allotted time and then fading away, like weeds and flowers in their shorter lifespan. The English climate is really tough on outdoor memorials. Just twenty years of weather can age a tombstone or building to look as old as a hundred years would in our drier climate—so quickly do the constant damp and drizzle wear away the surface of marble or sandstone. Carved edges lose their sharpness in a year or two; yellow lichens spread over a cherished name, erasing it while it’s still fresh in someone’s heart. Time consumes an English gravestone with remarkable speed; when the inscription is completely unreadable, the sexton removes the useless slab, maybe turns it into a hearthstone, digs up the incomplete remains that it failed to commemorate, and gives the site to someone new. In the Charter Street burial ground in Salem and in the old graveyard on the hill in Ipswich, I’ve seen older gravestones with readable inscriptions than in any English churchyard.

And yet this same ungenial climate, hostile as it generally is to the long remembrance of departed people, has sometimes a lovely way of dealing with the records on certain monuments that lie horizontally in the open air. The rain falls into the deep incisions of the letters, and has scarcely time to be dried away before another shower sprinkles the flat stone again, and replenishes those little reservoirs. The unseen, mysterious seeds of mosses find their way into the lettered furrows, and are made to germinate by the continual moisture and watery sunshine of the English sky; and by and by, in a year, or two years, or many years, behold the complete inscription—

And yet this same unwelcoming climate, which is generally hostile to the long-lasting memories of those who have passed away, sometimes has a beautiful way of interacting with the inscriptions on certain monuments that lie flat outdoors. The rain collects in the deep grooves of the letters, and hardly has time to dry before another shower sprinkles the stone again, filling those little reservoirs. The unseen, mysterious seeds of mosses find their way into the engraved lines and start to grow thanks to the constant moisture and watery sunlight of the English sky; and eventually, whether in a year, two years, or many years, there emerges the complete inscription—

     Here Lieth the body,
Here lies the body,

and all the rest of the tender falsehood—beautifully embossed in raised letters of living green, a bas-relief of velvet moss on the marble slab! It becomes more legible, under the skyey influences, after the world has forgotten the deceased, than when it was fresh from the stone-cutter's hands. It outlives the grief of friends. I first saw an example of this in Bebbington churchyard, in Cheshire, and thought that Nature must needs have had a special tenderness for the person (no noted man, however, in the world's history) so long ago laid beneath that stone, since she took such wonderful pains to "keep his memory green." Perhaps the proverbial phrase just quoted may have had its origin in the natural phenomenon here described.

and all the rest of the gentle lies—beautifully embossed in raised letters of vibrant green, a bas-relief of soft moss on the marble slab! It becomes clearer under the influences of the sky after the world has forgotten the deceased, more so than when it was freshly carved by the stone-cutter. It outlasts the sorrow of friends. I first noticed this in Bebbington churchyard, in Cheshire, and thought that Nature must have had a special fondness for the person (not a notable figure in history) who was laid beneath that stone long ago, since she took such great care to "keep his memory green." Perhaps the familiar phrase just quoted came from the natural phenomenon described here.

While we rested ourselves on a horizontal monument, which was elevated just high enough to be a convenient seat, I observed that one of the gravestones lay very close to the church,—so close that the droppings of the eaves would fall upon it. It seemed as if the inmate of that grave had desired to creep under the church-wall. On closer inspection, we found an almost illegible epitaph on the stone, and with difficulty made out this forlorn verse:—

While we rested on a flat monument that was just high enough to be a comfortable seat, I noticed that one of the gravestones was very close to the church—so close that the rain from the roof would hit it. It looked like the person buried there wanted to be under the church wall. Upon closer inspection, we discovered an almost unreadable epitaph on the stone, and we struggled to make out this sad verse:—

    "Poorly lived,
     And poorly died,
     Poorly buried,
     And no one cried."
"Badly lived,  
And badly died,  
Badly buried,  
And no one cried."

It would be hard to compress the story of a cold and luckless life, death, and burial into fewer words, or more impressive ones; at least, we found them impressive, perhaps because we had to re-create the inscription by scraping away the lichens from the faintly traced letters. The grave was on the shady and damp side of the church, endwise towards it, the head-stone being within about three feet of the foundation-wall; so that, unless the poor man was a dwarf, he must have been doubled up to fit him into his final resting-place. No wonder that his epitaph murmured against so poor a burial as this! His name, as well as I could make it out, was Treeo,—John Treeo, I think,—and he died in 1810, at the age of seventy-four. The gravestone is so overgrown with grass and weeds, so covered with unsightly lichens, and so crumbly with time and foul weather, that it is questionable whether anybody will ever be at the trouble of deciphering it again. But there is a quaint and sad kind of enjoyment in defeating (to such slight degree as my pen may do it) the probabilities of oblivion for poor John Treeo, and asking a little sympathy for him, half a century after his death, and making him better and more widely known, at least, than any other slumberer in Lillington churchyard: he having been, as appearances go, the outcast of them all.

It would be tough to summarize the story of a cold and unfortunate life, death, and burial in fewer words or more striking ones; at least, we found them striking, maybe because we had to recreate the inscription by scraping off the lichens from the faintly etched letters. The grave was on the shady and damp side of the church, turned toward it, the headstone being only about three feet from the foundation wall; so, unless the poor man was a dwarf, he must have been curled up to fit into his final resting place. No wonder his epitaph lamented such a poor burial! His name, as best I could make out, was Treeo—John Treeo, I think—and he died in 1810 at the age of seventy-four. The gravestone is so overgrown with grass and weeds, so covered with unsightly lichens, and so crumbled from time and bad weather, that it’s questionable whether anyone will ever bother to decode it again. But there’s a unique and bittersweet kind of pleasure in slightly overcoming the chances of oblivion for poor John Treeo, asking for a bit of sympathy for him, half a century after his death, and making him better known, at least, than any other occupant in Lillington churchyard: he being, by appearances, the outcast of them all.

You find similar old churches and villages in all the neighboring country, at the distance of every two or three miles; and I describe them, not as being rare, but because they are so common and characteristic. The village of Whitnash, within twenty minutes' walk of Leamington, looks as secluded, as rural, and as little disturbed by the fashions of to-day, as if Dr. Jephson had never developed all those Parades and Crescents out of his magic well. I used to wonder whether the inhabitants had ever yet heard of railways, or, at their slow rate of progress, had even reached the epoch of stage-coaches. As you approach the village, while it is yet unseen, you observe a tall, overshadowing canopy of elm-tree tops, beneath which you almost hesitate to follow the public road, on account of the remoteness that seems to exist between the precincts of this old-world community and the thronged modern street out of which you have so recently emerged. Venturing onward, however, you soon find yourself in the heart of Whitnash, and see an irregular ring of ancient rustic dwellings surrounding the village-green, on one side of which stands the church, with its square Norman tower and battlements, while close adjoining is the vicarage, made picturesque by peaks and gables. At first glimpse, none of the houses appear to be less than two or three centuries old, and they are of the ancient, wooden-framed fashion, with thatched roofs, which give them the air of birds' nests, thereby assimilating them closely to the simplicity of nature.

You can find similar old churches and villages in every neighboring area, just a couple of miles apart. I mention them not because they’re rare, but because they’re really common and typical. The village of Whitnash, only a twenty-minute walk from Leamington, feels as secluded, rural, and untouched by today’s trends as if Dr. Jephson had never created all those Parades and Crescents from his magic well. I often wondered if the residents had ever heard of railways, or if they were still stuck in the era of stagecoaches, given their slow pace of life. As you get closer to the village, even before you see it, you notice a tall, shadowy canopy of elm tree tops that makes you hesitate to follow the public road because of the distance that seems to exist between this old-world community and the bustling modern street you just left. But if you keep going, you’ll soon find yourself in the heart of Whitnash, where an irregular ring of ancient rustic houses surrounds the village green. On one side stands the church, with its square Norman tower and battlements, and right next to it is the vicarage, made charming by its peaks and gables. At first glance, none of the houses seem to be less than two or three centuries old, and they’re built in the old wooden-framed style, with thatched roofs that make them look like birds' nests, closely resembling the simplicity of nature.

The church-tower is mossy and much gnawed by time; it has narrow loopholes up and down its front and sides, and an arched window over the low portal, set with small panes of glass, cracked, dim, and irregular, through which a bygone age is peeping out into the daylight. Some of those old, grotesque faces, called gargoyles, are seen on the projections of the architecture. The churchyard is very small, and is encompassed by a gray stone fence that looks as ancient as the church itself. In front of the tower, on the village-green, is a yew-tree of incalculable age, with a vast circumference of trunk, but a very scanty head of foliage; though its boughs still keep some of the vitality which perhaps was in its early prime when the Saxon invaders founded Whitnash. A thousand years is no extraordinary antiquity in the lifetime of a yew. We were pleasantly startled, however, by discovering an exuberance of more youthful life than we had thought possible in so old a tree; for the faces of two children laughed at us out of an opening in the trunk, which had become hollow with long decay. On one side of the yew stood a framework of worm-eaten timber, the use and meaning of which puzzled me exceedingly, till I made it out to be the village-stocks; a public institution that, in its day, had doubtless hampered many a pair of shank-bones, now crumbling in the adjacent churchyard. It is not to be supposed, however, that this old-fashioned mode of punishment is still in vogue among the good people of Whitnash. The vicar of the parish has antiquarian propensities, and had probably dragged the stocks out of some dusty hiding-place, and set them up on their former site as a curiosity.

The church tower is covered in moss and worn down by time; it has narrow openings along its front and sides, and an arched window above the low entrance, filled with small panes of glass that are cracked, dull, and uneven, allowing a glimpse of a time long past into the light of day. Some of those old, bizarre figures known as gargoyles can be seen on the edges of the architecture. The churchyard is quite small, surrounded by a gray stone wall that looks as ancient as the church itself. In front of the tower, on the village green, stands a yew tree of incredible age, with a thick trunk but sparse leaves; its branches still hold some of the life that might have been present in its early days when Saxon invaders established Whitnash. A thousand years is not an uncommon age for a yew. We were pleasantly surprised, however, to find more youthful life than we had expected in such an old tree; because the faces of two children smiled at us from an opening in the trunk, which had become hollow with age. Next to the yew was a frame of rotting wood, the purpose of which puzzled me greatly until I realized it was the village stocks; a public fixture that, in its time, had certainly restrained many feet, now decaying in the nearby churchyard. It's important to note that this outdated form of punishment is no longer practiced by the good people of Whitnash. The parish vicar has a fondness for antiquities and likely pulled the stocks from some dusty corner and set them up in their original spot as a curiosity.

I disquiet myself in vain with the effort to hit upon some characteristic feature, or assemblage of features, that shall convey to the reader the influence of hoar antiquity lingering into the present daylight, as I so often felt it in these old English scenes. It is only an American who can feel it; and even he begins to find himself growing insensible to its effect, after a long residence in England. But while you are still new in the old country, it thrills you with strange emotion to think that this little church of Whitnash, humble as it seems, stood for ages under the Catholic faith, and has not materially changed since Wickcliffe's days, and that it looked as gray as now in Bloody Mary's time, and that Cromwell's troopers broke off the stone noses of those same gargoyles that are now grinning in your face. So, too, with the immemorial yew-tree: you see its great roots grasping hold of the earth like gigantic claws, clinging so sturdily that no effort of time can wrench them away; and there being life in the old tree, you feel all the more as if a contemporary witness were telling you of the things that have been. It has lived among men, and been a familiar object to them, and seen them brought to be christened and married and buried in the neighboring church and churchyard, through so many centuries, that it knows all about our race, so far as fifty generations of the Whitnash people can supply such knowledge.

I worry in vain trying to pinpoint some specific feature or combination of features that would convey to the reader the lingering influence of ancient history in today’s world, as I have often felt it in these old English scenes. Only an American can truly feel this; even they begin to lose sensitivity to its impact after living in England for a while. But when you’re still new in this old country, it fills you with strange emotions to realize that this little church in Whitnash, as humble as it appears, has stood for centuries under the Catholic faith and hasn’t changed much since Wycliffe’s time, that it looked just as gray during Bloody Mary’s reign, and that Cromwell’s soldiers broke off the stone noses of those same gargoyles now grinning at you. The ancient yew tree is the same: you see its massive roots gripping the earth like giant claws, holding on so firmly that no amount of time can pull them away; and knowing that the old tree is alive makes you feel like a contemporary witness is telling you about events that have happened. It has lived among people, been a familiar sight to them, and has seen generations come to be baptized, married, and buried in the neighboring church and churchyard for so many centuries, that it knows about our kind, as much as fifty generations of the Whitnash people can offer such knowledge.

And, after all, what a weary life it must have been for the old tree! Tedious beyond imagination! Such, I think, is the final impression on the mind of an American visitor, when his delight at finding something permanent begins to yield to his Western love of change, and he becomes sensible of the heavy air of a spot where the forefathers and foremothers have grown up together, intermarried, and died, through a long succession of lives, without any intermixture of new elements, till family features and character are all run in the same inevitable mould. Life is there fossilized in its greenest leaf. The man who died yesterday or ever so long ago walks the village-street to day, and chooses the same wife that he married a hundred years since, and must be buried again to-morrow under the same kindred dust that has already covered him half a score of times. The stone threshold of his cottage is worn away with his hobnailed footsteps, shuffling over it from the reign of the first Plantagenet to that of Victoria. Better than this is the lot of our restless countrymen, whose modern instinct bids them tend always towards "fresh woods and pastures new." Rather than such monotony of sluggish ages, loitering on a village-green, toiling in hereditary fields, listening to the parson's drone lengthened through centuries in the gray Norman church, let us welcome whatever change may come,—change of place, social customs, political institutions, modes of worship,—trusting, that, if all present things shall vanish, they will but make room for better systems, and for a higher type of man to clothe his life in them, and to fling them off in turn.

And after all, what a tiring life it must have been for the old tree! So boring beyond imagination! That’s probably the final impression of an American visitor when their excitement about finding something lasting starts to fade, giving way to their Western love for change. They start to notice the heavy air of a place where generations of ancestors have lived, intermarried, and died, over a long succession of lives, without any introduction of new elements. Family traits and characteristics have all become stuck in the same inevitable mold. Life there is preserved in its greenest leaf. The man who died yesterday or ages ago walks the village street today and picks the same wife he married a hundred years ago, only to be buried again tomorrow under the same ancestral soil that has already covered him many times before. The stone threshold of his cottage is worn down by his heavy footsteps shuffling over it from the reign of the first Plantagenet to that of Victoria. Better than this is the fate of our restless countrymen, whose modern instinct pushes them toward “fresh woods and pastures new.” Rather than endure such monotony of stagnant ages, hanging around a village green, laboring in inherited fields, and listening to the parson's drone that has echoed through centuries in the gray Norman church, let’s embrace whatever changes may come—changes in place, social customs, political institutions, and ways of worship—trusting that if everything present fades away, it will only clear the way for better systems and for a higher type of man to inhabit them, only to eventually discard them too.

Nevertheless, while an American willingly accepts growth and change as the law of his own national and private existence, he has a singular tenderness for the stone-incrusted institutions of the mother-country. The reason may be (though I should prefer a more generous explanation) that he recognizes the tendency of these hardened forms to stiffen her joints and fetter her ankles, in the race and rivalry of improvement. I hated to see so much as a twig of ivy wrenched away from an old wall in England. Yet change is at work, even in such a village as Whitnash. At a subsequent visit, looking more critically at the irregular circle of dwellings that surround the yew-tree and confront the church, I perceived that some of the houses must have been built within no long time, although the thatch, the quaint gables, and the old oaken framework of the others diffused an air of antiquity over the whole assemblage. The church itself was undergoing repair and restoration, which is but another name for change. Masons were making patchwork on the front of the tower, and were sawing a slab of stone and piling up bricks to strengthen the side-wall, or possibly to enlarge the ancient edifice by an additional aisle. Moreover, they had dug an immense pit in the churchyard, long and broad, and fifteen feet deep, two thirds of which profundity were discolored by human decay, and mixed up with crumbly bones. What this excavation was intended for I could nowise imagine, unless it were the very pit in which Longfellow bids the "Dead Past bury its Dead," and Whitnash, of all places in the world, were going to avail itself of our poet's suggestion. If so, it must needs be confessed that many picturesque and delightful things would be thrown into the hole, and covered out of sight forever.

Nevertheless, while an American willingly accepts growth and change as a fundamental part of their national and personal life, they have a unique fondness for the timeworn institutions of their mother country. The reason might be (though I would prefer a more generous explanation) that they recognize how these established forms can hinder progress and hold back improvement. I hated to see even a twig of ivy pulled away from an old wall in England. Yet change is happening, even in a village like Whitnash. On a later visit, observing more closely the uneven circle of homes surrounding the yew tree and facing the church, I noticed that some of the houses must have been built relatively recently, although the thatch, the charming gables, and the old oak frames of the others gave off an air of age over the entire scene. The church itself was under repair and renovation, which is just another way of saying change. Masons were patching the front of the tower and cutting stone slabs while stacking bricks to reinforce the side wall or possibly to expand the ancient building with an additional aisle. Furthermore, they had dug a huge pit in the churchyard, long and wide, and fifteen feet deep, two-thirds of which depth was stained by human decay and mixed with crumbling bones. I could not imagine what this excavation was for unless it were the very pit in which Longfellow tells us to let the "Dead Past bury its Dead," and Whitnash, of all places, was going to take our poet's advice. If that’s the case, it must be admitted that many picturesque and lovely things would be tossed into the hole and hidden away forever.

The article which I am writing has taken its own course, and occupied itself almost wholly with country churches; whereas I had purposed to attempt a description of some of the many old towns—Warwick, Coventry, Kenilworth, Stratford-on-Avon—which lie within an easy scope of Leamington. And still another church presents itself to my remembrance. It is that of Hatton, on which I stumbled in the course of a forenoon's ramble, and paused a little while to look at it for the sake of old Dr. Parr, who was once its vicar. Hatton, so far as I could discover, has no public-house, no shop, no contiguity of roofs (as in most English villages, however small), but is merely an ancient neighborhood of farm-houses, spacious, and standing wide apart, each within its own precincts, and offering a most comfortable aspect of orchards, harvest-fields, barns, stacks, and all manner of rural plenty. It seemed to be a community of old settlers, among whom everything had been going on prosperously since an epoch beyond the memory of man; and they kept a certain privacy among themselves, and dwelt on a cross-road, at the entrance of which was a barred gate, hospitably open, but still impressing me with a sense of scarcely warrantable intrusion. After all, in some shady nook of those gentle Warwickshire slopes there may have been a denser and more populous settlement, styled Hatton, which I never reached.

The article I'm writing has taken its own direction and mostly focuses on country churches, while I originally intended to describe some of the many old towns—Warwick, Coventry, Kenilworth, Stratford-on-Avon—that are easily accessible from Leamington. Another church comes to mind: it's the one in Hatton, which I came across during a morning stroll and stopped to admire for the sake of the late Dr. Parr, who used to be its vicar. Hatton, as far as I could tell, has no pub, no shop, and no rooftops close together (like most English villages, no matter how small), but is simply an old neighborhood of farmhouses, spacious and widely spaced out, each within its own grounds, and providing a very pleasant view of orchards, fields, barns, stacks, and all sorts of rural abundance. It seemed like a community of long-established settlers, where everything had been thriving since a time beyond anyone's memory; they maintained a certain privacy among themselves and lived along a cross-road, at the entrance of which was a barred gate, welcomingly open but still giving me a sense of intruding. After all, there might be a denser and more populated settlement called Hatton in some shady corner of those gentle Warwickshire hills that I never found.

Emerging from the by-road, and entering upon one that crossed it at right angles and led to Warwick, I espied the church of Dr. Parr. Like the others which I have described, it had a low stone tower, square, and battlemented at its summit: for all these little churches seem to have been built on the same model, and nearly at the same measurement, and have even a greater family-likeness than the cathedrals. As I approached, the bell of the tower (a remarkably deep-toned bell, considering how small it was) flung its voice abroad, and told me that it was noon. The church stands among its graves, a little removed from the wayside, quite apart from any collection of houses, and with no signs of vicarage; it is a good deal shadowed by trees, and not wholly destitute of ivy. The body of the edifice, unfortunately (and it is an outrage which the English church-wardens are fond of perpetrating), has been newly covered with a yellowish plaster or wash, so as quite to destroy the aspect of antiquity, except upon the tower, which wears the dark gray hue of many centuries. The chancel-window is painted with a representation of Christ upon the Cross, and all the other windows are full of painted or stained glass, but none of it ancient, nor (if it be fair to judge from without of what ought to be seen within) possessing any of the tender glory that should be the inheritance of this branch of Art, revived from mediaeval times. I stepped over the graves, and peeped in at two or three of the windows, and saw the snug interior of the church glimmering through the many-colored panes, like a show of commonplace objects under the fantastic influence of a dream: for the floor was covered with modern pews, very like what we may see in a New England meeting-house, though, I think, a little more favorable than those would be to the quiet slumbers of the Hatton farmers and their families. Those who slept under Dr. Parr's preaching now prolong their nap, I suppose, in the churchyard round about, and can scarcely have drawn much spiritual benefit from any truths that he contrived to tell them in their lifetime. It struck me as a rare example (even where examples are numerous) of a man utterly misplaced, that this enormous scholar, great in the classic tongues, and inevitably converting his own simplest vernacular into a learned language, should have been set up in this homely pulpit, and ordained to preach salvation to a rustic audience, to whom it is difficult to imagine how he could ever have spoken one available word.

Coming off the back road and onto one that intersected it at a right angle, leading to Warwick, I spotted Dr. Parr's church. Like the others I've described, it had a low, square stone tower with battlements on top. These small churches all seem to be built in a similar style and almost the same size, sharing even more resemblance than the cathedrals. As I walked closer, the tower's bell (a surprisingly deep-sounding bell for its small size) announced that it was noon. The church is surrounded by graves, set back from the road, quite isolated from any group of houses, with no signs of a vicarage. It’s mostly shaded by trees and has some ivy growing on it. Unfortunately, the body of the church (which is a common issue with English church wardens) has been recently covered with a yellowish plaster that completely ruins its ancient look, except for the tower, which remains a dark gray from centuries of wear. The chancel window features a depiction of Christ on the Cross, and all the other windows are filled with painted or stained glass, but none of it is old or, judging from the outside, holds any of the beauty that this art form should inherit from medieval times. I stepped over the graves and peeked into a few of the windows, seeing the cozy interior of the church shining through the colorful panes, like a display of ordinary items under a dream's quirky influence. The floor was covered with modern pews, similar to those in a New England meeting house, though they seemed a bit more comfortable for the quiet slumbers of the Hatton farmers and their families. Those who dozed off under Dr. Parr’s preaching likely now continue their rest in the surrounding churchyard and probably didn’t gain much spiritual benefit from the messages he shared during their lifetime. It struck me as a rare example (even in a sea of such examples) of a man who was completely out of place — this towering scholar, fluent in classical languages and inevitably transforming even his simplest speech into learned dialogue, was put in this humble pulpit to preach salvation to a rural crowd, to whom it's hard to imagine he ever managed to communicate a single helpful idea.

Almost always, in visiting such scenes as I have been attempting to describe, I had a singular sense of having been there before. The ivy-grown English churches (even that of Bebbington, the first that I beheld) were quite as familiar to me, when fresh from home, as the old wooden meeting-house in Salem, which used, on wintry Sabbaths, to be the frozen purgatory of my childhood. This was a bewildering, yet very delightful emotion fluttering about me like a faint summer wind, and filling my imagination with a thousand half-remembrances, which looked as vivid as sunshine, at a side-glance, but faded quite away whenever I attempted to grasp and define them. Of course, the explanation of the mystery was, that history, poetry, and fiction, books of travel, and the talk of tourists, had given me pretty accurate preconceptions of the common objects of English scenery, and these, being long ago vivified by a youthful fancy, had insensibly taken their places among the images of things actually seen. Yet the illusion was often so powerful, that I almost doubted whether such airy remembrances might not be a sort of innate idea, the print of a recollection in some ancestral mind, transmitted, with fainter and fainter impress through several descents, to my own. I felt, indeed, like the stalwart progenitor in person, returning to the hereditary haunts after more than two hundred years, and finding the church, the hall, the farm-house, the cottage, hardly changed during his long absence,—the same shady by-paths and hedge-lanes, the same veiled sky, and green lustre of the lawns and fields,—while his own affinities for these things, a little obscured by disuse, were reviving at every step.

Almost always, when visiting places like the ones I’ve been trying to describe, I had a strange feeling of having been there before. The ivy-covered English churches (even Bebbington, the first one I saw) felt just as familiar to me straight from home as the old wooden meeting house in Salem, which, on cold winter Sundays, used to feel like frozen purgatory in my childhood. This was a bewildering yet delightful feeling, fluttering around me like a soft summer breeze, filling my imagination with a thousand half-remembered images that seemed as bright as sunshine when I glanced at them, but faded away whenever I tried to focus on them. The explanation for this mystery was that history, poetry, fiction, travel books, and conversations with tourists had given me pretty accurate ideas about typical English scenery, and these thoughts, which had been brought to life by a youthful imagination long ago, had quietly nestled among my actual memories. Yet the illusion was often so strong that I almost wondered whether these vague memories might be some kind of innate idea, the imprint of a memory from an ancestral mind, passed down with a fainter mark through generations to me. I felt like a sturdy ancestor returning to the family’s old haunts after more than two hundred years, finding the church, the hall, the farmhouse, the cottage, hardly changed during his long absence—the same shady paths and hedgerows, the same overcast sky, and the green shimmer of the lawns and fields—while my own connections to these places, slightly dulled from lack of use, were awakening with every step I took.

An American is not very apt to love the English people, as a whole, on whatever length of acquaintance. I fancy that they would value our regard, and even reciprocate it in their ungracious way, if we could give it to them in spite of all rebuffs; but they are beset by a curious and inevitable infelicity, which compels them, as it were, to keep up what they seem to consider a wholesome bitterness of feeling between themselves and all other nationalities, especially that of America. They will never confess it; nevertheless, it is as essential a tonic to them as their bitter ale. Therefore,—and possibly, too, from a similar narrowness in his own character,—an American seldom feels quite as if he were at home among the English people. If he do so, he has ceased to be an American. But it requires no long residence to make him love their island, and appreciate it as thoroughly as they themselves do. For my part, I used to wish that we could annex it, transferring their thirty millions of inhabitants to some convenient wilderness in the great West, and putting half or a quarter as many of ourselves into their places. The change would be beneficial to both parties. We, in our dry atmosphere, are getting too nervous, haggard, dyspeptic, extenuated, unsubstantial, theoretic, and need to be made grosser. John Bull, on the other hand, has grown bulbous, long-bodied, short-legged, heavy-witted, material, and, in a word, too intensely English. In a few more centuries he will be the earthliest creature that ever the earth saw. Heretofore Providence has obviated such a result by timely intermixtures of alien races with the old English stock; so that each successive conquest of England has proved a victory by the revivification and improvement of its native manhood. Cannot America and England hit upon some scheme to secure even greater advantages to both nations?

An American isn't likely to feel much love for the English people overall, no matter how long they've known them. I think they would appreciate our affection and might even return it in their somewhat ungracious way if we could offer it to them despite the countless rebuffs. However, they're plagued by a strange and unavoidable dissatisfaction that seems to compel them to maintain what they see as a necessary bitterness between themselves and other nationalities, especially us Americans. They’ll never admit it, but this attitude is as vital to them as their bitter ale. Because of this—and perhaps due to a similar narrowness in their own character—an American often doesn’t feel completely at home among the English. If they do, they’ve stopped being an American. Still, it doesn’t take long living there for someone to fall in love with the country and appreciate it as much as the locals do. Personally, I used to wish we could annex England, moving their thirty million people to some suitable area in the West and placing half or a quarter of our population in their spots. The change would benefit both sides. Here in our dry climate, we’re becoming too anxious, worn out, unhealthy, insubstantial, and theoretical, and we need a bit of grounding. On the other hand, John Bull has become heavy-set, long-bodied, short-legged, narrowly focused, and, in short, extremely English. In a few more centuries, he’ll be the most earthbound creature the planet has ever known. Until now, fate has prevented this outcome by mixing in foreign races with the old English stock, meaning that every conquest of England has rejuvenated and improved its native population. Can’t America and England come up with a plan that provides even more benefits for both nations?





ABOUT WARWICK.

Between bright, new Leamington, the growth of the present century, and rusty Warwick, founded by King Cymbeline in the twilight ages, a thousand years before the mediaeval darkness, there are two roads, either of which may be measured by a sober-paced pedestrian in less than half an hour.

Between the vibrant, modern Leamington, which has developed in this century, and the aged Warwick, established by King Cymbeline long ago, a thousand years before the medieval era, there are two roads that a steady walker can cover in less than thirty minutes.

One of these avenues flows out of the midst of the smart parades and crescents of the former town,—along by hedges and beneath the shadow of great elms, past stuccoed Elizabethan villas and wayside alehouses, and through a hamlet of modern aspect,—and runs straight into the principal thoroughfare of Warwick. The battlemented turrets of the castle, embowered half-way up in foliage, and the tall, slender tower of St. Mary's Church, rising from among clustered roofs, have been visible almost from the commencement of the walk. Near the entrance of the town stands St. John's School-House, a picturesque old edifice of stone, with four peaked gables in a row, alternately plain and ornamented, and wide, projecting windows, and a spacious and venerable porch, all overgrown with moss and ivy, and shut in from the world by a high stone fence, not less mossy than the gabled front. There is an iron gate, through the rusty open-work of which you see a grassy lawn, and almost expect to meet the shy, curious eyes of the little boys of past generations, peeping forth from their infantile antiquity into the strangeness of our present life. I find a peculiar charm in these long-established English schools, where the school-boy of to-day sits side by side, as it were, with his great-grandsire, on the same old benches, and often, I believe, thumbs a later, but unimproved edition of the same old grammar or arithmetic. The newfangled notions of a Yankee school-committee would madden many a pedagogue, and shake down the roof of many a time-honored seat of learning, in the mother-country.

One of these paths leads out from the elegant parades and crescents of the old town—past hedges and under the shade of large elms, alongside stuccoed Elizabethan houses and roadside pubs, and through a modern-looking village—straight into the main street of Warwick. The castle's battlemented towers, half-hidden by greenery, and the tall, slender tower of St. Mary's Church, rising over clustered rooftops, have been visible almost since the beginning of the walk. Near the town entrance stands St. John's School-House, a charming old stone building with four peaked gables in a row, alternating between plain and decorative, wide overhanging windows, and a spacious, venerable porch, all covered in moss and ivy, enclosed from the world by a tall stone wall, which is just as mossy as the gabled front. There’s an iron gate, through the rusty, ornate design of which you can see a grassy lawn, and you almost expect to catch a glimpse of the shy, curious eyes of little boys from past generations, peeking out from their childhood surroundings into the unfamiliarity of our modern life. I find a unique charm in these long-established English schools, where today’s schoolboy seems to sit side by side with his great-grandfather on the same old benches, often thumbing through a newer, but unchanged edition of the same old grammar or arithmetic. The modern ideas of an American school committee would drive many a teacher crazy and could bring down the roof of many a time-honored place of learning in the mother country.

At this point, however, we will turn back, in order to follow up the other road from Leamington, which was the one that I loved best to take. It pursues a straight and level course, bordered by wide gravel-walks and overhung by the frequent elm, with here a cottage and there a villa, on one side a wooded plantation, and on the other a rich field of grass or grain, until, turning at right angles, it brings you to an arched bridge over the Avon. Its parapet is a balustrade carved out of freestone, into the soft substance of which a multitude of persons have engraved their names or initials, many of them now illegible, while others, more deeply cut, are illuminated with fresh green moss. These tokens indicate a famous spot; and casting our eyes along the smooth gleam and shadow of the quiet stream, through a vista of willows that droop on either side into the water, we behold the gray magnificence of Warwick Castle, uplifting itself among stately trees, and rearing its turrets high above their loftiest branches. We can scarcely think the scene real, so completely do those machicolated towers, the long line of battlements, the massive buttresses, the high-windowed walls, shape out our indistinct ideas of the antique time. It might rather seem as if the sleepy river (being Shakespeare's Avon, and often, no doubt, the mirror of his gorgeous visions) were dreaming now of a lordly residence that stood here many centuries ago; and this fantasy is strengthened, when you observe that the image in the tranquil water has all the distinctness of the actual structure. Either might be the reflection of the other. Wherever Time has gnawed one of the stones, you see the mark of his tooth just as plainly in the sunken reflection. Each is so perfect, that the upper vision seems a castle in the air, and the lower one an old stronghold of feudalism, miraculously kept from decay in an enchanted river.

At this point, though, we will turn back to explore the other road from Leamington, which was the one I preferred the most. It runs straight and level, lined by wide gravel paths and shaded by numerous elms, with cottages and villas scattered along one side, and a wooded area on the other side, along with a lush field of grass or crops, until it makes a right turn and leads you to an arched bridge over the Avon. The bridge's railing is a balustrade carved from freestone, where many people have etched their names or initials over time—some have faded and are now hard to read, while others are deeply carved and beautifully adorned with fresh green moss. These marks indicate a well-known spot; and as we look along the smooth shine and shadows of the calm stream, framed by drooping willows on either side, we can see the impressive Warwick Castle rising majestically among the tall trees, its towers soaring high above the tallest branches. It's almost hard to believe the scene is real, as those towering battlements, the long line of walls, the sturdy buttresses, and the high-windowed walls shape our vague ideas of ancient times. It feels more like the peaceful river (being Shakespeare's Avon, which surely reflected his magnificent visions) is dreaming of a grand estate that stood here centuries ago; and this illusion is reinforced when you notice that the image in the still water is just as clear as the actual castle above. Each could easily be the reflection of the other. Wherever Time has worn away at the stone, you can see the mark of its passage just as clearly in the submerged reflection. Both images are so vivid that the upper view looks like a castle in the clouds, while the lower one appears to be a long-standing fortress of feudal times, somehow preserved against decay in a magical river.

A ruinous and ivy-grown bridge, that projects from the bank a little on the hither side of the castle, has the effect of making the scene appear more entirely apart from the every-day world, for it ends abruptly in the middle of the stream,—so that, if a cavalcade of the knights and ladies of romance should issue from the old walls, they could never tread on earthly ground, any more than we, approaching from the side of modern realism, can overleap the gulf between our domain and theirs. Yet, if we seek to disenchant ourselves, it may readily be done. Crossing the bridge on which we stand, and passing a little farther on, we come to the entrance of the castle, abutting on the highway, and hospitably open at certain hours to all curious pilgrims who choose to disburse half a crown or so toward the support of the earl's domestics. The sight of that long series of historic rooms, full of such splendors and rarities as a great English family necessarily gathers about itself, in its hereditary abode, and in the lapse of ages, is well worth the money, or ten times as much, if indeed the value of the spectacle could be reckoned in money's-worth. But after the attendant has hurried you from end to end of the edifice, repeating a guide-book by rote, and exorcising each successive hall of its poetic glamour and witchcraft by the mere tone in which he talks about it, you will make the doleful discovery that Warwick Castle has ceased to be a dream. It is better, methinks, to linger on the bridge, gazing at Caesar's Tower and Guy's Tower in the dim English sunshine above, and in the placid Avon below, and still keep them as thoughts in your own mind, than climb to their summits, or touch even a stone of their actual substance. They will have all the more reality for you, as stalwart relics of immemorial time, if you are reverent enough to leave them in the intangible sanctity of a poetic vision.

A crumbling, ivy-covered bridge that juts out from the bank just before the castle makes the scene feel completely disconnected from the everyday world. It ends abruptly in the middle of the stream, so if a procession of knights and ladies from a story were to come out of the old walls, they wouldn't be able to set foot on solid ground, just as we, approaching from the side of reality, can't cross the gap between our world and theirs. However, if we want to change that feeling, it’s easy to do. If we walk across the bridge we’re on and continue a bit further, we can reach the castle entrance that opens onto the highway, welcoming curious visitors at certain times for a fee of half a crown to help support the earl's staff. The long line of historic rooms filled with the splendor and treasures a great English family accumulates over generations in their ancestral home is definitely worth the admission, or even ten times that amount, if you could measure the experience in monetary terms. But after the guide rushes you through the entire building, reciting a script and stripping each hall of its poetic charm with their monotonous tone, you’ll sadly realize that Warwick Castle has lost its dreamlike quality. I think it's better to linger on the bridge, looking at Caesar's Tower and Guy's Tower in the soft English sunlight above and the calm Avon below, keeping them as private thoughts in your mind rather than climbing to the top or even touching their real stones. They’ll feel more real to you as strong remnants of ancient times if you’re respectful enough to leave them in the intangible beauty of a poetic vision.

From the bridge over the Avon, the road passes in front of the castle-gate, and soon enters the principal street of Warwick, a little beyond St. John's School-House, already described. Chester itself, most antique of English towns, can hardly show quainter architectural shapes than many of the buildings that border this street. They are mostly of the timber-and-plaster kind, with bowed and decrepit ridge-poles, and a whole chronology of various patchwork in their walls; their low-browed doorways open upon a sunken floor; their projecting stories peep, as it were, over one another's shoulders, and rise into a multiplicity of peaked gables; they have curious windows, breaking out irregularly all over the house, some even in the roof, set in their own little peaks, opening lattice-wise, and furnished with twenty small panes of lozenge-shaped glass. The architecture of these edifices (a visible oaken framework, showing the whole skeleton of the house,—as if a man's bones should be arranged on his outside, and his flesh seen through the interstices) is often imitated by modern builders, and with sufficiently picturesque effect. The objection is, that such houses, like all imitations of bygone styles, have an air of affectation; they do not seem to be built in earnest; they are no better than playthings, or overgrown baby-houses, in which nobody should be expected to encounter the serious realities of either birth or death. Besides, originating nothing, we leave no fashions for another age to copy, when we ourselves shall have grown antique.

From the bridge over the Avon, the road goes past the castle gate and soon enters the main street of Warwick, just beyond St. John's School-House, which has already been described. Chester itself, one of the oldest English towns, can hardly show more charming architectural styles than many of the buildings along this street. Most are timber-and-plaster structures, with bowed and worn ridge-poles, featuring a variety of patched walls; their low doorways open onto a sunken floor; their overhanging stories seem to peek over each other's shoulders and rise into numerous peaked gables; they have quirky windows popping up irregularly all over the house, some even in the roof, set in their own little peaks, opening in a lattice style and fitted with twenty small panes of diamond-shaped glass. The architecture of these buildings (a visible oak framework showing the entire skeleton of the house—as if a man's bones were arranged on the outside and his flesh could be seen through the gaps) is often copied by modern builders, achieving a sufficiently picturesque effect. The problem is that these houses, like all copies of past styles, come off as pretentious; they don’t feel genuinely built; they are no better than toys or oversized dollhouses, where nobody is expected to face the serious realities of life or death. Besides, by creating nothing original, we leave no trends for future generations to replicate when we ourselves have become outdated.

Old as it looks, all this portion of Warwick has overbrimmed, as it were, from the original settlement, being outside of the ancient wall. The street soon runs under an arched gateway, with a church or some other venerable structure above it, and admits us into the heart of the town. At one of my first visits, I witnessed a military display. A regiment of Warwickshire militia, probably commanded by the Earl, was going through its drill in the market-place; and on the collar of one of the officers was embroidered the Bear and Ragged Staff, which has been the cognizance of the Warwick earldom from time immemorial. The soldiers were sturdy young men, with the simple, stolid, yet kindly faces of English rustics, looking exceedingly well in a body, but slouching into a yeoman-like carriage and appearance the moment they were dismissed from drill. Squads of them were distributed everywhere about the streets, and sentinels were posted at various points; and I saw a sergeant, with a great key in his hand (big enough to have been the key of the castle's main entrance when the gate was thickest and heaviest), apparently setting a guard. Thus, centuries after feudal times are past, we find warriors still gathering under the old castle-walls, and commanded by a feudal lord, just as in the days of the King-Maker, who, no doubt, often mustered his retainers in the same market-place where I beheld this modern regiment.

As old as it looks, this part of Warwick has overflowed, so to speak, from the original settlement, lying outside the ancient walls. The street quickly leads under an arched gateway, with a church or some other historic building above it, bringing us into the heart of the town. On one of my first visits, I witnessed a military display. A regiment of Warwickshire militia, likely commanded by the Earl, was performing its drill in the marketplace; on the collar of one of the officers was the Bear and Ragged Staff, which has been the emblem of the Warwick earldom for ages. The soldiers were sturdy young men, with the simple, solid, yet friendly faces of English farmers, looking impressive as a group but slouching into a more relaxed manner as soon as they were done with the drill. They were spread out all over the streets, with sentinels stationed at various points; I saw a sergeant holding a large key (big enough to be the main entrance key to the castle when the gate was heaviest), seemingly setting up a guard. Thus, centuries after the feudal era has ended, we still find warriors gathering under the old castle walls, commanded by a feudal lord, just like in the days of the King-Maker, who undoubtedly often gathered his followers in the same marketplace where I saw this modern regiment.

The interior of the town wears a less old-fashioned aspect than the suburbs through which we approach it; and the High Street has shops with modern plate-glass, and buildings with stuccoed fronts, exhibiting as few projections to hang a thought or sentiment upon as if an architect of to-day had planned them. And, indeed, so far as their surface goes, they are perhaps new enough to stand unabashed in an American street; but behind these renovated faces, with their monotonous lack of expression, there is probably the substance of the same old town that wore a Gothic exterior in the Middle Ages. The street is an emblem of England itself. What seems new in it is chiefly a skilful and fortunate adaptation of what such a people as ourselves would destroy. The new things are based and supported on sturdy old things, and derive a massive strength from their deep and immemorial foundations, though with such limitations and impediments as only an Englishman could endure. But he likes to feel the weight of all the past upon his back; and, moreover, the antiquity that overburdens him has taken root in his being, and has grown to be rather a hump than a pack, so that there is no getting rid of it without tearing his whole structure to pieces. In my judgment, as he appears to be sufficiently comfortable under the mouldy accretion, he had better stumble on with it as long as he can. He presents a spectacle which is by no means without its charm for a disinterested and unencumbered observer.

The town's interior looks less outdated than the suburbs we passed through; the High Street has shops with modern glass fronts and buildings with smooth facades that show as few details as if a today's architect designed them. In fact, their surface might be new enough to fit right in on an American street, but behind these refreshed exteriors, with their boring lack of character, there’s probably the essence of the same old town that once had a Gothic style in the Middle Ages. The street represents England itself. What seems new mainly reflects a clever and fortunate adaptation of what people like us might destroy. The new elements are built on solid old foundations, gaining strength from their deep roots, though they come with limitations that only an Englishman could tolerate. But he likes to feel the weight of history on his shoulders; the age that weighs him down has become part of him, growing into more of a hump than a burden, making it impossible to shed without dismantling his whole being. In my opinion, since he seems comfortable with this accumulation of history, he might as well keep going with it for as long as he can. He presents a sight that’s quite charming for an unbiased and unburdened observer.

When the old edifice, or the antiquated custom or institution, appears in its pristine form, without any attempt at intermarrying it with modern fashions, an American cannot but admire the picturesque effect produced by the sudden cropping up of an apparently dead-and-buried state of society into the actual present, of which he is himself a part. We need not go far in Warwick without encountering an instance of the kind. Proceeding westward through the town, we find ourselves confronted by a huge mass of natural rock, hewn into something like architectural shape, and penetrated by a vaulted passage, which may well have been one of King Cymbeline's original gateways; and on the top of the rock, over the archway, sits a small old church, communicating with an ancient edifice, or assemblage of edifices, that look down from a similar elevation on the side of the street. A range of trees half hides the latter establishment from the sun. It presents a curious and venerable specimen of the timber-and-plaster style of building, in which some of the finest old houses in England are constructed; the front projects into porticos and vestibules, and rises into many gables, some in a row, and others crowning semi-detached portions of the structure; the windows mostly open on hinges, but show a delightful irregularity of shape and position; a multiplicity of chimneys break through the roof at their own will, or, at least, without any settled purpose of the architect. The whole affair looks very old,—so old indeed that the front bulges forth, as if the timber framework were a little weary, at last, of standing erect so long; but the state of repair is so perfect, and there is such an indescribable aspect of continuous vitality within the system of this aged house, that you feel confident that there may be safe shelter yet, and perhaps for centuries to come, under its time-honored roof. And on a bench, sluggishly enjoying the sunshine, and looking into the street of Warwick as from a life apart, a few old men are generally to be seen, wrapped in long cloaks, on which you may detect the glistening of a silver badge representing the Bear and Ragged Staff. These decorated worthies are some of the twelve brethren of Leicester's Hospital,—a community which subsists to-day under the identical modes that were established for it in the reign of Queen Elizabeth, and of course retains many features of a social life that has vanished almost everywhere else.

When the old building, or the outdated custom or institution, appears in its original form, without any effort to blend it with modern trends, an American can’t help but admire the striking effect created by the sudden emergence of a seemingly dead and buried way of life into the present, of which he is a part. We don’t have to go far in Warwick to find an example of this. As we head west through the town, we come across a massive natural rock, shaped somewhat like architecture and featuring a vaulted passage, which might well have been one of King Cymbeline's original gates; and on top of the rock, over the archway, sits a small old church, connected to an ancient building, or group of buildings, that overlook the street from a similar height. A row of trees partially shields this establishment from the sun. It offers a fascinating and ancient example of the timber-and-plaster building style, in which some of the finest old houses in England are constructed; the front features porticos and vestibules and rises into numerous gables, some lined up in a row, and others crowning detached parts of the structure; the windows mainly open on hinges but show a charming irregularity in shape and position; a variety of chimneys poke through the roof at will, or at least without any fixed purpose from the architect. The whole place looks quite old—so old that the front bulges a bit, as if the timber framework is finally a little tired of standing upright for so long; yet the state of repair is so excellent, and there’s such an indescribable sense of ongoing vitality within this aged house that you feel confident there may be safe shelter still, perhaps for centuries to come, under its time-honored roof. And on a bench, lazily enjoying the sunshine and gazing into the street of Warwick as if from a separate life, a few elderly men are usually seen, wrapped in long cloaks, on which you can spot the glimmer of a silver badge representing the Bear and Ragged Staff. These distinguished gentlemen are some of the twelve brethren of Leicester's Hospital—a community that continues today under the same rules established during the reign of Queen Elizabeth, and of course retains many aspects of a social life that has disappeared almost everywhere else.

The edifice itself dates from a much older period than the charitable institution of which it is now the home. It was the seat of a religious fraternity far back in the Middle Ages, and continued so till Henry VIII. turned all the priesthood of England out of doors, and put the most unscrupulous of his favorites into their vacant abodes. In many instances, the old monks had chosen the sites of their domiciles so well, and built them on such a broad system of beauty and convenience, that their lay-occupants found it easy to convert them into stately and comfortable homes; and as such they still exist, with something of the antique reverence lingering about them. The structure now before us seems to have been first granted to Sir Nicholas Lestrange, who perhaps intended, like other men, to establish his household gods in the niches whence he had thrown down the images of saints, and to lay his hearth where an altar had stood. But there was probably a natural reluctance in those days (when Catholicism, so lately repudiated, must needs have retained an influence over all but the most obdurate characters) to bring one's hopes of domestic prosperity and a fortunate lineage into direct hostility with the awful claims of the ancient religion. At all events, there is still a superstitious idea, betwixt a fantasy and a belief, that the possession of former Church-property has drawn a curse along with it, not only among the posterity of those to whom it was originally granted, but wherever it has subsequently been transferred, even if honestly bought and paid for. There are families, now inhabiting some of the beautiful old abbeys, who appear to indulge a species of pride in recording the strange deaths and ugly shapes of misfortune that have occurred among their predecessors, and may be supposed likely to dog their own pathway down the ages of futurity. Whether Sir Nicholas Lestrange, in the beef-eating days of Old Harry and Elizabeth, was a nervous man, and subject to apprehensions of this kind, I cannot tell; but it is certain that he speedily rid himself of the spoils of the Church, and that, within twenty years afterwards, the edifice became the property of the famous Dudley, Earl of Leicester, brother of the Earl of Warwick. He devoted the ancient religious precinct to a charitable use, endowing it with an ample revenue, and making it the perpetual home of twelve poor, honest, and war-broken soldiers, mostly his own retainers, and natives either of Warwickshire or Gloucestershire. These veterans, or others wonderfully like them, still occupy their monkish dormitories and haunt the time-darkened corridors and galleries of the hospital, leading a life of old-fashioned comfort, wearing the old-fashioned cloaks, and burnishing the identical silver badges which the Earl of Leicester gave to the original twelve. He is said to have been a bad man in his day; but he has succeeded in prolonging one good deed into what was to him a distant future.

The building itself is older than the charity it currently houses. It was once home to a religious brotherhood way back in the Middle Ages and remained so until Henry VIII expelled the priests from England and placed his most unscrupulous favorites in their vacant spaces. In many cases, the old monks had picked their locations with such care and built them with a strong sense of beauty and practicality that their new occupants found it easy to transform them into grand and comfortable homes; they still exist today, carrying a bit of that old reverence. The structure in front of us seems to have first been granted to Sir Nicholas Lestrange, who likely intended, like many others, to set up his household gods in the spots where he had removed the images of saints and to place his hearth where an altar once stood. However, there may have been a natural hesitation at that time (when Catholicism, recently rejected, probably still held sway over all but the most stubborn individuals) to align one's hopes for a prosperous home and a good lineage with a direct conflict against the powerful claims of the ancient faith. In any case, a superstitious belief persists, hovering between fantasy and reality, that owning former church property carries a curse along with it, not just for the descendants of those to whom it was originally granted, but also for anyone who has acquired it later, even if it was bought honestly. There are families currently living in some of the lovely old abbeys who seem to take pride in recounting the strange deaths and unfortunate events that have befallen their forebears, speculating that such misfortune may follow them through future generations. Whether Sir Nicholas Lestrange, during the meat-eating days of Henry VIII and Elizabeth, was anxious and prone to such fears, I cannot say; but it's clear that he quickly rid himself of the Church's spoils, and within twenty years, the building became the property of the renowned Dudley, Earl of Leicester, brother of the Earl of Warwick. He repurposed the ancient religious site for charity, endowing it with substantial funds, and making it a permanent home for twelve poor, honest, and battle-scarred soldiers, mostly his own retainers and natives of either Warwickshire or Gloucestershire. These veterans, or others very much like them, still occupy their monk-like dormitories and roam the darkened hallways and galleries of the hospital, living a life of old-school comfort, wearing traditional cloaks, and polishing the same silver badges that the Earl of Leicester gave to the original twelve. He is said to have been a bad man in his time; however, he managed to extend one good deed into what was for him a distant future.

On the projecting story, over the arched entrance, there is the date, 1571, and several coats-of-arms, either the Earl's or those of his kindred, and immediately above the doorway a stone sculpture of the Bear and Ragged Staff.

On the upper story, above the arched entrance, there's the date, 1571, and several coats of arms, either belonging to the Earl or his family. Right above the doorway, there's a stone sculpture of the Bear and Ragged Staff.

Passing through the arch, we find ourselves in a quadrangle, or enclosed court, such as always formed the central part of a great family residence in Queen Elizabeth's time, and earlier. There can hardly be a more perfect specimen of such an establishment than Leicester's Hospital. The quadrangle is a sort of sky-roofed hall, to which there is convenient access from all parts of the house. The four inner fronts, with their high, steep roofs and sharp gables, look into it from antique windows, and through open corridors and galleries along the sides; and there seems to be a richer display of architectural devices and ornaments, quainter carvings in oak, and more fantastic shapes of the timber framework, than on the side toward the street. On the wall opposite the arched entrance are the following inscriptions, comprising such moral rules, I presume, as were deemed most essential for the daily observance of the community: "Honor all Men"—"Fear God"—"Honor the King"—"Love the Brotherhood"; and again, as if this latter injunction needed emphasis and repetition among a household of aged people soured with the hard fortune of their previous lives,—"Be kindly affectioned one to another." One sentence, over a door communicating with the Master's side of the house, is addressed to that dignitary,—"He that ruleth over men must be just." All these are charactered in old English letters, and form part of the elaborate ornamentation of the house. Everywhere—on the walls, over windows and doors, and at all points where there is room to place them— appear escutcheons of arms, cognizances, and crests, emblazoned in their proper colors, and illuminating the ancient quadrangle with their splendor. One of these devices is a large image of a porcupine on an heraldic wreath, being the crest of the Lords de Lisle. But especially is the cognizance of the Bear and Ragged Staff repeated over and over, and over again and again, in a great variety of attitudes, at full-length, and half-length, in paint and in oaken sculpture, in bas-relief and rounded image. The founder of the hospital was certainly disposed to reckon his own beneficence as among the hereditary glories of his race; and had he lived and died a half-century earlier, he would have kept up an old Catholic custom by enjoining the twelve bedesmen to pray for the welfare of his soul.

Walking through the arch, we enter a courtyard, or enclosed space, which was a staple of large family homes during Queen Elizabeth's era and before. It's hard to find a better example of such a place than Leicester's Hospital. The courtyard acts like a sky-lit hall, easily accessible from every part of the house. The four inner facades, with their tall, steep roofs and pointed gables, overlook it through vintage windows, along with open walkways and galleries lining the sides. There seems to be a richer display of architectural styles and decorations, more intricate oak carvings, and more whimsical timber shapes than on the street-facing side. On the wall across from the arched entrance are the following inscriptions, which likely represent the moral guidelines considered essential for the community’s daily life: "Honor all Men"—"Fear God"—"Honor the King"—"Love the Brotherhood"; and again, as if this last message needed to be reiterated among a household of elderly individuals burdened by the hardships of their past—"Be kindly affectioned one to another." One sentence, above a door connecting to the Master's part of the house, is directed at that leader: "He that ruleth over men must be just." All these are inscribed in old English letters, forming part of the house's lavish decoration. Everywhere—on the walls, above windows and doors, and in any available space—there are coats of arms, symbols, and crests, displayed in their true colors, brightening the ancient courtyard with their brilliance. One of these symbols is a large porcupine on a heraldic wreath, representing the crest of the Lords de Lisle. But especially prevalent is the symbol of the Bear and Ragged Staff, appearing repeatedly in various poses, both full and half-length, in paint and carved wood, in bas-relief and as three-dimensional sculptures. The founder of the hospital clearly wanted to associate his charitable deeds with the noble legacy of his family; had he lived and died half a century earlier, he would have followed an old Catholic tradition by instructing the twelve bedesmen to pray for his soul's well-being.

At my first visit, some of the brethren were seated on the bench outside of the edifice, looking down into the street; but they did not vouchsafe me a word, and seemed so estranged from modern life, so enveloped in antique customs and old-fashioned cloaks, that to converse with them would have been like shouting across the gulf between our age and Queen Elizabeth's. So I passed into the quadrangle, and found it quite solitary, except that a plain and neat old woman happened to be crossing it, with an aspect of business and carefulness that bespoke her a woman of this world, and not merely a shadow of the past. Asking her if I could come in, she answered very readily and civilly that I might, and said that I was free to look about me, hinting a hope, however, that I would not open the private doors of the brotherhood, as some visitors were in the habit of doing. Under her guidance, I went into what was formerly the great hall of the establishment, where King James I. had once been feasted by an Earl of Warwick, as is commemorated by an inscription on the cobwebbed and dingy wall. It is a very spacious and barn-like apartment, with a brick floor, and a vaulted roof, the rafters of which are oaken beams, wonderfully carved, but hardly visible in the duskiness that broods aloft. The hall may have made a splendid appearance, when it was decorated with rich tapestry, and illuminated with chandeliers, cressets, and torches glistening upon silver dishes, where King James sat at supper among his brilliantly dressed nobles; but it has come to base uses in these latter days,—being improved, in Yankee phrase, as a brewery and wash-room, and as a cellar for the brethren's separate allotments of coal.

During my first visit, some of the members were sitting on the bench outside the building, looking down into the street. They didn't say a word to me and seemed so disconnected from modern life, wrapped up in old customs and outdated cloaks, that talking to them felt like shouting across the gap between our time and Queen Elizabeth's. So, I walked into the courtyard, which was quite empty, except for a plain and tidy old woman who was crossing it, looking busy and careful, indicating that she was a woman of the present and not just a relic of the past. When I asked if I could come in, she readily and politely said I could, and mentioned that I was free to explore, though she subtly suggested that I should avoid opening the private doors of the brotherhood, as some visitors tended to do. Guided by her, I entered what used to be the main hall of the establishment, where King James I. had once been entertained by an Earl of Warwick, as noted by an inscription on the cobweb-covered and dingy wall. It’s a very spacious, barn-like room with a brick floor and a vaulted ceiling, supported by intricately carved oak beams that are barely visible in the dim light. The hall might have looked magnificent when it was adorned with rich tapestries and lit with chandeliers, cressets, and torches reflecting off silver dishes, where King James dined among his elegantly dressed nobles; however, it has been put to less noble uses in recent times—being repurposed, in a typical American way, as a brewery and laundry room, as well as a storage space for the members' individual coal supplies.

The old lady here left me to myself, and I returned into the quadrangle. It was very quiet, very handsome, in its own obsolete style, and must be an exceedingly comfortable place for the old people to lounge in, when the inclement winds render it inexpedient to walk abroad. There are shrubs against the wall, on one side; and on another is a cloistered walk, adorned with stags' heads and antlers, and running beneath a covered gallery, up to which ascends a balustraded staircase. In the portion of the edifice opposite the entrance-arch are the apartments of the Master; and looking into the window (as the old woman, at no request of mine, had specially informed me that I might), I saw a low, but vastly comfortable parlor, very handsomely furnished, and altogether a luxurious place. It had a fireplace with an immense arch, the antique breadth of which extended almost from wall to wall of the room, though now fitted up in such a way, that the modern coal-grate looked very diminutive in the midst. Gazing into this pleasant interior, it seemed to me, that, among these venerable surroundings, availing himself of whatever was good in former things, and eking out their imperfection with the results of modern ingenuity, the Master might lead a not unenviable life. On the cloistered side of the quadrangle, where the dark oak panels made the enclosed space dusky, I beheld a curtained window reddened by a great blaze from within, and heard the bubbling and squeaking of something— doubtless very nice and succulent—that was being cooked at the kitchen-fire. I think, indeed, that a whiff or two of the savory fragrance reached my nostrils; at all events, the impression grew upon me that Leicester's Hospital is one of the jolliest old domiciles in England.

The old lady left me alone, and I headed back to the courtyard. It was really quiet and quite beautiful in its own outdated way, and it must be a super comfortable place for the older folks to relax when the harsh winds make it unwise to go outside. There are shrubs against one wall, and on another side, there's a covered walkway adorned with stags' heads and antlers, leading beneath a sheltered gallery, up to which a balustraded staircase climbs. Opposite the entrance arch are the Master's rooms, and peering into the window (which the old woman had told me I could do without me asking), I saw a cozy but very comfortable sitting room, elegantly furnished, and altogether a luxurious spot. It had a fireplace with a huge arch, its antique width stretching almost from one wall to the other, though set up now so that the modern coal grate looked quite small in comparison. As I gazed into this inviting space, it struck me that, among these charming old features, making use of the best from the past and enhancing their shortcomings with modern creativity, the Master could lead a pretty enjoyable life. On the cloistered side of the courtyard, where the dark oak panels made the area dim, I noticed a curtained window glowing red from a big fire inside, and I heard the bubbling and sizzling of something—surely very tasty—that was being cooked on the kitchen fire. I think I even caught a whiff of the delicious smell; in any case, I started to feel that Leicester's Hospital is one of the coziest old houses in England.

I was about to depart, when another old woman, very plainly dressed, but fat, comfortable, and with a cheerful twinkle in her eyes, came in through the arch, and looked curiously at me. This repeated apparition of the gentle sex (though by no means under its loveliest guise) had still an agreeable effect in modifying my ideas of an institution which I had supposed to be of a stern and monastic character. She asked whether I wished to see the hospital, and said that the porter, whose office it was to attend to visitors, was dead, and would be buried that very day, so that the whole establishment could not conveniently be shown me. She kindly invited me, however, to visit the apartment occupied by her husband and herself; so I followed her up the antique staircase, along the gallery, and into a small, oak-panelled parlor, where sat an old man in a long blue garment, who arose and saluted me with much courtesy. He seemed a very quiet person, and yet had a look of travel and adventure, and gray experience, such as I could have fancied in a palmer of ancient times, who might likewise have worn a similar costume. The little room was carpeted and neatly furnished; a portrait of its occupant was hanging on the wall; and on a table were two swords crossed,—one, probably, his own battle-weapon, and the other, which I drew half out of the scabbard, had an inscription on the blade, purporting that it had been taken from the field of Waterloo. My kind old hostess was anxious to exhibit all the particulars of their housekeeping, and led me into the bedroom, which was in the nicest order, with a snow-white quilt upon the bed; and in a little intervening room was a washing and bathing apparatus; a convenience (judging from the personal aspect and atmosphere of such parties) seldom to be met with in the humbler ranks of British life.

I was just about to leave when another older woman, dressed simply but looking comfortable and cheerful, walked in through the arch and glanced at me with curiosity. This repeated appearance of women (even if they weren't the most beautiful) had a nice way of changing my perception of a place I thought would be stern and monastic. She asked if I wanted to see the hospital and mentioned that the porter, who was in charge of visitors, had died and would be buried today, so I couldn't be shown around the entire facility. However, she kindly invited me to check out the room she shared with her husband. I followed her up the old staircase, along the gallery, and into a small, oak-paneled living room, where an old man in a long blue robe sat. He stood up and greeted me politely. He seemed very calm, yet there was a sense of adventure and wisdom in his eyes, like a weary traveler from ancient times who might have worn a similar outfit. The little room was cozy and well-furnished; there was a portrait of him on the wall, and on a table, two crossed swords—one likely being his own weapon, and the other, which I pulled halfway out of the scabbard, had an inscription claiming it was taken from the battlefield of Waterloo. My kind old hostess was eager to show me all the details of their home and led me into the bedroom, which was beautifully kept, with a pristine white quilt on the bed; in a small adjoining room was a washing and bathing setup, a luxury (given the personal nature and surroundings of such individuals) rarely found among the lower classes of British society.

The old soldier and his wife both seemed glad of somebody to talk with; but the good woman availed herself of the privilege far more copiously than the veteran himself, insomuch that he felt it expedient to give her an occasional nudge with his elbow in her well-padded ribs. "Don't you be so talkative!" quoth he; and, indeed, he could hardly find space for a word, and quite as little after his admonition as before. Her nimble tongue ran over the whole system of life in the hospital. The brethren, she said, had a yearly stipend (the amount of which she did not mention), and such decent lodgings as I saw, and some other advantages, free; and, instead of being pestered with a great many rules, and made to dine together at a great table, they could manage their little household matters as they liked, buying their own dinners and having them cooked in the general kitchen, and eating them snugly in their own parlors. "And," added she, rightly deeming this the crowning privilege, "with the Master's permission, they can have their wives to take care of them; and no harm comes of it; and what more can an old man desire?" It was evident enough that the good dame found herself in what she considered very rich clover, and, moreover, had plenty of small occupations to keep her from getting rusty and dull; but the veteran impressed me as deriving far less enjoyment from the monotonous ease, without fear of change or hope of improvement, that had followed upon thirty years of peril and vicissitude. I fancied, too, that, while pleased with the novelty of a stranger's visit, he was still a little shy of becoming a spectacle for the stranger's curiosity; for, if he chose to be morbid about the matter, the establishment was but an almshouse, in spite of its old-fashioned magnificence, and his fine blue cloak only a pauper's garment, with a silver badge on it that perhaps galled his shoulder. In truth, the badge and the peculiar garb, though quite in accordance with the manners of the Earl of Leicester's age, are repugnant to modern prejudices, and might fitly and humanely be abolished.

The old soldier and his wife both seemed happy to have someone to chat with; however, the good woman chatted much more than the veteran did, to the point where he felt the need to nudge her occasionally with his elbow in her padded side. "Don't be so talkative!" he said, and honestly, he struggled to get a word in, just as much after his warning as before. Her quick tongue covered everything about life in the hospital. She mentioned that the residents received an annual stipend (which she didn’t specify), decent accommodations, and some other benefits for free. Instead of being burdened with a bunch of rules and forced to eat together at a large table, they could manage their household matters as they wished, buying their own meals and having them prepared in the communal kitchen, and enjoying them comfortably in their own rooms. "And," she added, rightly seeing this as the best part, "with the Master's permission, they can have their wives take care of them; and it’s perfectly fine; what more could an old man want?" It was clear that she felt she was in a very fortunate situation and had plenty of little tasks to keep her from getting bored; but the veteran seemed to enjoy the monotonous ease, without the fear of change or hope for improvement, much less. I imagined that, while he appreciated the novelty of a stranger’s visit, he was still a bit hesitant about being a spectacle for the visitor’s curiosity; if he chose to dwell on it, the establishment was merely an almshouse, despite its old-fashioned grandeur, and his fine blue cloak was just a poor man’s garment, with a silver badge that perhaps chafed his shoulder. In truth, the badge and the unique clothing, while fitting for the time of the Earl of Leicester, clash with modern sensibilities and could rightfully and compassionately be eliminated.

A year or two afterwards I paid another visit to the hospital, and found a new porter established in office, and already capable of talking like a guide-book about the history, antiquities, and present condition of the charity. He informed me that the twelve brethren are selected from among old soldiers of good character, whose other resources must not exceed an income of five pounds; thus excluding all commissioned officers, whose half-pay would of course be more than that amount. They receive from the hospital an annuity of eighty pounds each, besides their apartments, a garment of fine blue cloth, an annual abundance of ale, and a privilege at the kitchen-fire; so that, considering the class from which they are taken, they may well reckon themselves among the fortunate of the earth. Furthermore, they are invested with political rights, acquiring a vote for member of Parliament in virtue either of their income or brotherhood. On the other hand, as regards their personal freedom or conduct, they are subject to a supervision which the Master of the hospital might render extremely annoying, were he so inclined; but the military restraint under which they have spent the active portion of their lives makes it easier for them to endure the domestic discipline here imposed upon their age. The porter bore his testimony (whatever were its value) to their being as contented and happy as such a set of old people could possibly be, and affirmed that they spent much time in burnishing their silver badges, and were as proud of them as a nobleman of his star. These badges, by the by, except one that was stolen and replaced in Queen Anne's time, are the very same that decorated the original twelve brethren.

A year or two later, I visited the hospital again and found a new porter who was already knowledgeable about the history, old traditions, and current state of the charity. He told me that the twelve brethren are chosen from among old soldiers with good character, whose other income must not exceed five pounds; this rules out all commissioned officers, whose half-pay would obviously be more than that. They receive an annual payment of eighty pounds each from the hospital, along with their own living quarters, a fine blue coat, a yearly supply of ale, and a spot by the kitchen fire; considering their background, they can definitely see themselves as some of the lucky ones. Additionally, they are given political rights, getting a vote for a member of Parliament based on either their income or their brotherhood. However, regarding their personal freedom or behavior, they are under supervision that the Master of the hospital could make quite annoying if he wanted to; but the military discipline they followed during their active years helps them handle the domestic rules imposed on them now. The porter shared his view (no matter how valuable it was) that they were as content and happy as a group of old folks could be, and he claimed they spent a lot of time polishing their silver badges, taking as much pride in them as a nobleman does in his star. By the way, except for one badge that was stolen and replaced during Queen Anne's time, these are the same badges that adorned the original twelve brethren.

I have seldom met with a better guide than my friend the porter. He appeared to take a genuine interest in the peculiarities of the establishment, and yet had an existence apart from them, so that he could the better estimate what those peculiarities were. To be sure, his knowledge and observation were confined to external things, but, so far, had a sufficiently extensive scope. He led me up the staircase and exhibited portions of the timber framework of the edifice that are reckoned to be eight or nine hundred years old, and are still neither worm-eaten nor decayed; and traced out what had been a great hall in the days of the Catholic fraternity, though its area is now filled up with the apartments of the twelve brethren; and pointed to ornaments of sculptured oak, done in an ancient religious style of art, but hardly visible amid the vaulted dimness of the roof. Thence we went to the chapel—the Gothic church which I noted several pages back—surmounting the gateway that stretches half across the street. Here the brethren attend daily prayer, and have each a prayer-book of the finest paper, with a fair, large type for their old eyes. The interior of the chapel is very plain, with a picture of no merit for an altar-piece, and a single old pane of painted glass in the great eastern window, representing,—no saint, nor angel, as is customary in such cases,—but that grim sinner, the Earl of Leicester. Nevertheless, amid so many tangible proofs of his human sympathy, one comes to doubt whether the Earl could have been such a hardened reprobate, after all.

I’ve rarely met a better guide than my friend the porter. He seemed genuinely interested in the quirks of the establishment, yet he lived separately from them, allowing him to better appreciate what those quirks were. Sure, his knowledge and observations were limited to external things, but they were extensive enough. He took me up the staircase and showed me parts of the building's wooden framework that are believed to be eight or nine hundred years old and are still neither worm-eaten nor decayed. He pointed out what used to be a grand hall during the time of the Catholic fraternity, although now its space is taken up by the rooms of the twelve brethren. He highlighted decorations made of sculpted oak, done in an old religious art style, but they were barely visible in the dimness of the vaulted ceiling. From there, we went to the chapel—the Gothic church I mentioned a few pages back—situated above the gateway that spans half the street. Here, the brethren gather for daily prayers, each with a prayer book printed on the finest paper, with large, clear type for their aging eyes. The interior of the chapel is quite simple, featuring a not-so-great picture for an altar piece and a single old stained glass pane in the large eastern window, which depicts—not a saint or an angel, as is common in these cases—but that grim sinner, the Earl of Leicester. Still, amidst all these clear signs of his human side, one starts to wonder if the Earl could have really been such a hardened reprobate after all.

We ascended the tower of the chapel, and looked down between its battlements into the street, a hundred feet below us; while clambering half-way up were foxglove-flowers, weeds, small shrubs, and tufts of grass, that had rooted themselves into the roughnesses of the stone foundation. Far around us lay a rich and lovely English landscape, with many a church-spire and noble country-seat, and several objects of high historic interest. Edge Hill, where the Puritans defeated Charles I., is in sight on the edge of the horizon, and much nearer stands the house where Cromwell lodged on the night before the battle. Right under our eyes, and half enveloping the town with its high-shouldering wall, so that all the closely compacted streets seemed but a precinct of the estate, was the Earl of Warwick's delightful park, a wide extent of sunny lawns, interspersed with broad contiguities of forest-shade. Some of the cedars of Lebanon were there,—a growth of trees in which the Warwick family take an hereditary pride. The two highest towers of the castle heave themselves up out of a mass of foliage, and look down in a lordly manner upon the plebeian roofs of the town, a part of which are slate-covered (these are the modern houses), and a part are coated with old red tiles, denoting the more ancient edifices. A hundred and sixty or seventy years ago, a great fire destroyed a considerable portion of the town, and doubtless annihilated many structures of a remote antiquity; at least, there was a possibility of very old houses in the long past of Warwick, which King Cymbeline is said to have founded in the year ONE of the Christian era!

We climbed the chapel tower and looked down between its battlements at the street, a hundred feet below us. Halfway up, we saw foxglove flowers, weeds, small shrubs, and tufts of grass that had rooted in the rough stone foundation. Surrounding us was a beautiful English landscape, dotted with church spires, impressive country homes, and several historically significant sites. Edge Hill, where the Puritans defeated Charles I, was visible on the horizon, and much closer stood the house where Cromwell stayed the night before the battle. Right below us, partly surrounding the town with its tall wall, making all the closely packed streets seem like just a part of the estate, was the Earl of Warwick's lovely park, a large area of sunny lawns interspersed with wide stretches of forest shade. Some of the cedars of Lebanon were there—a tree species in which the Warwick family takes great pride. The two tallest towers of the castle rise up from a mass of foliage and look down imperiously on the town's ordinary rooftops, some of which are covered with slate (the modern houses), while others are topped with old red tiles, indicating more ancient buildings. Around one hundred sixty or seventy years ago, a significant fire destroyed a large part of the town, likely wiping out many old structures; there might have been very old houses in Warwick’s history, which is said to have been founded by King Cymbeline in the year ONE of the Christian era!

And this historic fact or poetic fiction, whichever it may be, brings to mind a more indestructible reality than anything else that has occurred within the present field of our vision; though this includes the scene of Guy of Warwick's legendary exploits, and some of those of the Round Table, to say nothing of the Battle of Edge Hill. For perhaps it was in the landscape now under our eyes that Posthumus wandered with the King's daughter, the sweet, chaste, faithful, and courageous Imogen, the tenderest and womanliest woman that Shakespeare ever made immortal in the world. The silver Avon, which we see flowing so quietly by the gray castle, may have held their images in its bosom.

And this historic fact or poetic tale, whichever it may be, reminds us of a more enduring reality than anything else happening in our current view; this includes the scenes of Guy of Warwick's legendary adventures and some of those of the Round Table, not to mention the Battle of Edge Hill. Perhaps it was in the landscape before us that Posthumus roamed with the King's daughter, the sweet, pure, loyal, and brave Imogen, the most tender and feminine character that Shakespeare ever made immortal. The silver Avon, which we see flowing quietly by the gray castle, may have held their reflections in its waters.

The day, though it began brightly, had long been overcast, and the clouds now spat down a few spiteful drops upon us, besides that the east-wind was very chill; so we descended the winding tower-stair, and went next into the garden, one side of which is shut in by almost the only remaining portion of the old city-wall. A part of the garden-ground is devoted to grass and shrubbery, and permeated by gravel-walks, in the centre of one of which is a beautiful stone vase of Egyptian sculpture, that formerly stood on the top of a Nilometer, or graduated pillar for measuring the rise and fall of the river Nile. On the pedestal is a Latin inscription by Dr. Parr, who (his vicarage of Hatton being so close at hand) was probably often the Master's guest, and smoked his interminable pipe along these garden-walks. Of the vegetable-garden, which lies adjacent, the lion's share is appropriated to the Master, and twelve small, separate patches to the individual brethren, who cultivate them at their own judgment and by their own labor; and their beans and cauliflowers have a better flavor, I doubt not, than if they had received them directly from the dead hand of the Earl of Leicester, like the rest of their food. In the farther part of the garden is an arbor for the old men's pleasure and convenience, and I should like well to sit down among them there, and find out what is really the bitter and the sweet of such a sort of life. As for the old gentlemen themselves, they put me queerly in mind of the Salem Custom-House, and the venerable personages whom I found so quietly at anchor there.

The day started off sunny, but it had turned overcast, and now a few unkind drops of rain were falling on us, while the east wind was really chilly. So, we went down the winding staircase of the tower and headed into the garden, one side of which is bordered by what’s left of the old city wall. Part of the garden is filled with grass and shrubs and has gravel paths, one of which features a beautiful stone vase with Egyptian designs, which used to sit atop a Nilometer, a structure that measured the river Nile's level. On the pedestal, there's a Latin inscription by Dr. Parr, who probably often visited the Master since his vicarage in Hatton was nearby, enjoying his endless pipe along those garden walks. The vegetable garden next door is primarily for the Master, while twelve small patches are assigned to individual brethren, who cultivate them on their own terms and through their own effort; I’m sure their beans and cauliflowers taste better than if they had come from the deceased Earl of Leicester, like the rest of their food. At the far end of the garden, there’s a gazebo for the older men’s enjoyment and comfort, and I would love to sit with them there and discover the real ups and downs of that kind of life. As for the older gentlemen themselves, they remind me oddly of the Salem Custom-House and the respectable figures I found so peacefully settled there.

The Master's residence, forming one entire side of the quadrangle, fronts on the garden, and wears an aspect at once stately and homely. It can hardly have undergone any perceptible change within three centuries; but the garden, into which its old windows look, has probably put off a great many eccentricities and quaintnesses, in the way of cunningly clipped shrubbery, since the gardener of Queen Elizabeth's reign threw down his rusty shears and took his departure. The present Master's name is Harris; he is a descendant of the founder's family, a gentleman of independent fortune, and a clergyman of the Established Church, as the regulations of the hospital require him to be. I know not what are his official emoluments; but, according to an English precedent, an ancient charitable fund is certain to be held directly for the behoof of those who administer it, and perhaps incidentally, in a moderate way, for the nominal beneficiaries; and, in the case before us, the twelve brethren being so comfortably provided for, the Master is likely to be at least as comfortable as all the twelve together. Yet I ought not, even in a distant land, to fling an idle gibe against a gentleman of whom I really know nothing, except that the people under his charge bear all possible tokens of being tended and cared for as sedulously as if each of them sat by a warm fireside of his own, with a daughter bustling round the hearth to make ready his porridge and his titbits. It is delightful to think of the good life which a suitable man, in the Master's position, has an opportunity to lead,—linked to time-honored customs, welded in with an ancient system, never dreaming of radical change, and bringing all the mellowness and richness of the past down into these railway-days, which do not compel him or his community to move a whit quicker than of yore. Everybody can appreciate the advantages of going ahead; it might be well, sometimes, to think whether there is not a word or two to be said in favor of standing still or going to sleep.

The Master's residence, making up one whole side of the quadrangle, faces the garden and has an appearance that's both impressive and cozy. It probably hasn't changed much in three centuries; however, the garden, which the old windows overlook, has likely shed many quirks and oddities, like the intricately trimmed shrubbery, since the gardener from Queen Elizabeth's time dropped his rusty shears and left. The current Master's name is Harris; he's a descendant of the founder's family, a man of independent wealth, and a clergyman of the Established Church, as the hospital's rules require. I don't know what his official income is, but, following an English tradition, an old charitable fund is likely reserved primarily for the administrators and, to a lesser extent, for the nominal beneficiaries; in this case, with the twelve brothers comfortably taken care of, the Master is likely as comfortable as all twelve combined. Still, even in a distant land, I shouldn't throw around an idle jab at a gentleman I know nothing about, except that the people under his care show all signs of being looked after as if each one of them were sitting by a warm fire in their own home, with a daughter bustling around to prepare their porridge and snacks. It's uplifting to think about the good life a suitable person in the Master's position can lead—connected to long-standing traditions, integrated within an ancient system, not dreaming of major changes, and bringing all the warmth and richness of the past into these modern railway days, which don't force him or his community to move any faster than before. Everyone can see the benefits of moving forward; it might be worth considering, at times, whether there are a few points to be made in favor of standing still or taking a break.

From the garden we went into the kitchen, where the fire was burning hospitably, and diffused a genial warmth far and wide, together with the fragrance of some old English roast-beef, which, I think, must at that moment have been done nearly to a turn. The kitchen is a lofty, spacious, and noble room, partitioned off round the fireplace, by a sort of semicircular oaken screen, or rather, an arrangement of heavy and high-backed settles, with an ever-open entrance between them, on either side of which is the omnipresent image of the Bear and Ragged Staff, three feet high, and excellently carved in oak, now black with time and unctuous kitchen-smoke. The ponderous mantel-piece, likewise of carved oak, towers high towards the dusky ceiling, and extends its mighty breadth to take in a vast area of hearth, the arch of the fireplace being positively so immense that I could compare it to nothing but the city gateway. Above its cavernous opening were crossed two ancient halberds, the weapons, possibly, of soldiers who had fought under Leicester in the Low Countries; and elsewhere on the walls were displayed several muskets, which some of the present inmates of the hospital may have levelled against the French. Another ornament of the mantel-piece was a square of silken needlework or embroidery, faded nearly white, but dimly representing that wearisome Bear and Ragged Staff, which we should hardly look twice at, only that it was wrought by the fair fingers of poor Amy Robsart, and beautifully framed in oak from Kenilworth Castle, at the expense of a Mr. Conner, a countryman of our own. Certainly, no Englishman would be capable of this little bit of enthusiasm. Finally, the kitchen-firelight glistens on a splendid display of copper flagons, all of generous capacity, and one of them about as big as a half-barrel; the smaller vessels contain the customary allowance of ale, and the larger one is filled with that foaming liquor on four festive occasions of the year, and emptied amain by the jolly brotherhood. I should be glad to see them do it; but it would be an exploit fitter for Queen Elizabeth's age than these degenerate times.

From the garden, we entered the kitchen, where a welcoming fire was burning, spreading a cozy warmth throughout the room, along with the smell of some old English roast beef, which I think must have been just about ready. The kitchen is a tall, spacious, and impressive room, divided around the fireplace by a semicircular oak screen, or more accurately, a setup of heavy, high-backed benches, with a wide opening between them. On either side stands the ever-present image of the Bear and Ragged Staff, three feet tall and beautifully carved from oak, now darkened by time and greasy kitchen smoke. The heavy mantelpiece, also carved from oak, reaches high towards the dim ceiling and stretches widely, covering a large area of the hearth, with the arch of the fireplace being so massive that I can only compare it to a city gate. Above the deep opening are two ancient halberds crossed, possibly the weapons of soldiers who fought under Leicester in the Low Countries; elsewhere on the walls, several muskets are displayed, which some current residents of the hospital may have used against the French. Another decoration on the mantelpiece is a faded square of silk embroidery, nearly white, but faintly showing that tedious Bear and Ragged Staff, which we wouldn't take a second glance at if it weren't crafted by the delicate hands of poor Amy Robsart, beautifully framed in oak from Kenilworth Castle, courtesy of a Mr. Conner, who was one of our own. No Englishman would show such enthusiasm for this little piece. Finally, the firelight gleams on a stunning array of copper flagons, all quite large, with one about the size of a half-barrel; the smaller ones hold the usual ale, while the larger one is filled with that frothy drink for four festive occasions each year, and is quickly drained by the cheerful brotherhood. I would love to see them do it; but it would be more fitting for Queen Elizabeth's time than these lesser days.

The kitchen is the social hall of the twelve brethren. In the daytime, they bring their little messes to be cooked here, and eat them in their own parlors; but after a certain hour, the great hearth is cleared and swept, and the old men assemble round its blaze, each with his tankard and his pipe, and hold high converse through the evening. If the Master be a fit man for his office, methinks he will sometimes sit down sociably among them; for there is an elbow-chair by the fireside which it would not demean his dignity to fill, since it was occupied by King James at the great festival of nearly three centuries ago. A sip of the ale and a whiff of the tobacco-pipe would put him in friendly relations with his venerable household; and then we can fancy him instructing them by pithy apothegms and religious texts which were first uttered here by some Catholic priest and have impregnated the atmosphere ever since. If a joke goes round, it shall be of an elder coinage than Joe Miller's, as old as Lord Bacon's collection, or as the jest-book that Master Slender asked for when he lacked small-talk for sweet Anne Page. No news shall be spoken of later than the drifting ashore, on the northern coast, of some stern-post or figure-head, a barnacled fragment of one of the great galleons of the Spanish Armada. What a tremor would pass through the antique group, if a damp newspaper should suddenly be spread to dry before the fire! They would feel as if either that printed sheet or they themselves must be an unreality. What a mysterious awe, if the shriek of the railway-train, as it reaches the Warwick station, should ever so faintly invade their ears! Movement of any kind seems inconsistent with the stability of such an institution. Nevertheless, I trust that the ages will carry it along with them; because it is such a pleasant kind of dream for an American to find his way thither, and behold a piece of the sixteenth century set into our prosaic times, and then to depart, and think of its arched doorway as a spell-guarded entrance which will never be accessible or visible to him any more.

The kitchen is the social hub for the twelve brothers. During the day, they bring their meals to be cooked here and eat them in their own rooms. But after a certain time, the big hearth is cleared and cleaned, and the older men gather around its warmth, each with his tankard and pipe, sharing conversations throughout the evening. If the Master is a suitable person for his role, he might sometimes join them; there's an armchair by the fire that wouldn’t be beneath his dignity, as it was once occupied by King James at a grand festival nearly three centuries ago. A sip of ale and a puff of tobacco would help him connect with his wise household, and we can imagine him sharing memorable sayings and religious quotes that were first spoken here by some Catholic priest and have lingered in the air ever since. Any joke exchanged would be older than Joe Miller's, as ancient as Lord Bacon's collection, or from the joke book that Master Slender asked for when he needed small talk for sweet Anne Page. No news would be mentioned that’s newer than a stern post or figurehead washed up on the northern coast, a barnacled remnant of one of the Spanish Armada's great galleons. What a shock would ripple through the old group if a damp newspaper suddenly appeared to dry by the fire! They’d feel as if either that printed page or they themselves must be unreal. How mysterious it would be if the sound of a train approaching the Warwick station ever so faintly reached their ears! Any kind of movement seems out of place in such a stable institution. Still, I hope that the ages carry it forward because it’s such a delightful experience for someone from America to find their way there, see a piece of the sixteenth century set in our mundane times, and then leave, thinking of its arched doorway as a magically protected entrance that will never be accessible or visible to them again.

Not far from the market-place of Warwick stands the great church of St. Mary's: a vast edifice, indeed, and almost worthy to be a cathedral. People who pretend to skill in such matters say that it is in a poor style of architecture, though designed (or, at least, extensively restored) by Sir Christopher Wren; but I thought it very striking, with its wide, high, and elaborate windows, its tall towers, its immense length, and (for it was long before I outgrew this Americanism, the love of an old thing merely for the sake of its age) the tinge of gray antiquity over the whole. Once, while I stood gazing up at the tower, the clock struck twelve with a very deep intonation, and immediately some chivies began to play, and kept up their resounding music for five minutes, as measured by the hand upon the dial. It was a very delightful harmony, as airy as the notes of birds, and seemed, a not unbecoming freak of half-sportive fancy in the huge, ancient, and solemn church; although I have seen an old-fashioned parlor-clock that did precisely the same thing, in its small way.

Not far from the Warwick marketplace stands the great church of St. Mary's: a massive building that's almost worthy of being a cathedral. People who claim to know about such things say it's in a poor architectural style, even though it was designed (or at least largely restored) by Sir Christopher Wren; but I found it very striking, with its wide, tall, and intricate windows, its high towers, its incredible length, and (since it took me a while to outgrow this American habit of valuing old things just because they're old) the touch of gray antiquity that enveloped it. Once, while I was gazing up at the tower, the clock struck twelve with a deep resonance, and immediately some chimes began to play, continuing their melodic sound for five minutes, as indicated by the hand on the dial. It was a delightful melody, as light as birdsong, and seemed like a charming whim of half-playful fantasy in the vast, ancient, and solemn church; although I have seen an old-fashioned parlor clock that did exactly the same thing, on a much smaller scale.

The great attraction of this edifice is the Beauchamp (or, as the English, who delight in vulgarizing their fine old Norman names, call it, the Beechum) Chapel, where the Earls of Warwick and their kindred have been buried, from four hundred years back till within a recent period. It is a stately and very elaborate chapel, with a large window of ancient painted glass, as perfectly preserved as any that I remember seeing in England, and remarkably vivid in its colors. Here are several monuments with marble figures recumbent upon them, representing the Earls in their knightly armor, and their dames in the ruffs and court-finery of their day, looking hardly stiffer in stone than they must needs have been in their starched linen and embroidery. The renowned Earl of Leicester of Queen Elizabeth's time, the benefactor of the hospital, reclines at full length on the tablet of one of these tombs, side by side with his Countess,—not Amy Robsart, but a lady who (unless I have confused the story with some other mouldy scandal) is said to have avenged poor Amy's murder by poisoning the Earl himself. Be that as it may, both figures, and especially the Earl, look like the very types of ancient Honor and Conjugal Faith. In consideration of his long-enduring kindness to the twelve brethren, I cannot consent to believe him as wicked as he is usually depicted; and it seems a marvel, now that so many well-established historical verdicts have been reversed, why some enterprising writer does not make out Leicester to have been the pattern nobleman of his age.

The main attraction of this building is the Beauchamp (or, as the English, who enjoy simplifying their beautiful old Norman names, call it, the Beechum) Chapel, where the Earls of Warwick and their relatives have been buried for four hundred years up until recently. It’s a grand and detailed chapel, featuring a large window of ancient stained glass, perfectly preserved and remarkably vibrant in color. Inside, there are several monuments with marble figures lying on them, depicting the Earls in their knightly armor and their ladies in the ruffs and fancy dresses of their time, looking hardly stiffer in stone than they must have been in their starched linen and embroidery. The famous Earl of Leicester from Queen Elizabeth's time, the benefactor of the hospital, lies fully stretched out on the tablet of one of these tombs, next to his Countess—not Amy Robsart, but a woman who (unless I’ve mixed up the story with some other old scandal) is said to have avenged poor Amy’s murder by poisoning the Earl himself. Regardless, both figures, especially the Earl, embody the very ideals of Honor and Marital Fidelity. Given his longstanding generosity to the twelve brethren, I can't bring myself to believe he was as wicked as he is usually portrayed; and it seems surprising, now that so many established historical judgments have been overturned, why some enterprising writer hasn’t claimed that Leicester was the ideal nobleman of his time.

In the centre of the chapel is the magnificent memorial of its founder, Richard Beauchamp, Earl of Warwick in the time of Henry VI. On a richly ornamented altar-tomb of gray marble lies the bronze figure of a knight in gilded armor, most admirably executed: for the sculptors of those days had wonderful skill in their own style, and could make so lifelike an image of a warrior, in brass or marble, that, if a trumpet were sounded over his tomb, you would expect him to start up and handle his sword. The Earl whom we now speak of, however, has slept soundly in spite of a more serious disturbance than any blast of a trumpet, unless it were the final one. Some centuries after his death, the floor of the chapel fell down and broke open the stone coffin in which he was buried; and among the fragments appeared the anciently entombed Earl of Warwick, with the color scarcely faded out of his cheeks, his eyes a little sunken, but in other respects looking as natural as if he had died yesterday. But exposure to the atmosphere appeared to begin and finish the long-delayed process of decay in a moment, causing him to vanish like a bubble; so, that, almost before there had been time to wonder at him, there was nothing left of the stalwart Earl save his hair. This sole relic the ladies of Warwick made prize of, and braided it into rings and brooches for their own adornment; and thus, with a chapel and a ponderous tomb built on purpose to protect his remains, this great nobleman could not help being brought untimely to the light of day, nor even keep his lovelocks on his skull after he had so long done with love. There seems to be a fatality that disturbs people in their sepulchres, when they have been over-careful to render them magnificent and impregnable,—as witness the builders of the Pyramids, and Hadrian, Augustus, and the Scipios, and most other personages whose mausoleums have been conspicuous enough to attract the violator; and as for dead men's hair, I have seen a lock of King Edward the Fourth's, of a reddish-brown color, which perhaps was once twisted round the delicate forefinger of Mistress Shore.

In the center of the chapel is the stunning memorial of its founder, Richard Beauchamp, Earl of Warwick during the reign of Henry VI. On a richly decorated gray marble altar-tomb lies the bronze figure of a knight in gilded armor, beautifully crafted: the sculptors of that time had incredible skill in their art and could create such lifelike images of warriors, in brass or marble, that if a trumpet were sounded over his tomb, you’d expect him to jump up and grab his sword. However, the Earl we are talking about has rested peacefully despite a more significant disruption than any trumpet blast, unless it was the final one. Centuries after his death, the chapel floor collapsed and broke open the stone coffin in which he was buried; and among the debris appeared the long-buried Earl of Warwick, with the color hardly faded from his cheeks, his eyes slightly sunken, but in other ways looking as natural as if he had just died yesterday. But exposure to the air seemed to kick off and finish the long-overdue process of decay in an instant, causing him to disappear like a bubble; so, almost before there was time to marvel at him, there was nothing left of the robust Earl except for his hair. The ladies of Warwick took this sole relic and braided it into rings and brooches for their own adornment; thus, with a chapel and a heavy tomb built specifically to protect his remains, this great nobleman could not avoid being brought prematurely into the light of day, nor could he keep his lovely locks on his head after he had long been done with love. There seems to be a curse that disrupts people in their tombs when they take extra care to make them grand and secure—just like the builders of the Pyramids, and Hadrian, Augustus, and the Scipios, and most other notable figures whose mausoleums have been prominent enough to attract intruders; and as for the hair of the dead, I’ve seen a lock of King Edward the Fourth's, a reddish-brown color, which perhaps was once wrapped around the delicate finger of Mistress Shore.

The direct lineage of the renowned characters that lie buried in this splendid chapel has long been extinct. The earldom is now held by the Grevilles, descendants of the Lord Brooke who was slain in the Parliamentary War; and they have recently (that is to say, within a century) built a burial-vault on the other side of the church, calculated (as the sexton assured me, with a nod as if he were pleased) to afford suitable and respectful accommodation to as many as fourscore coffins. Thank Heaven, the old man did not call them "CASKETS"!—a vile modern phrase, which compels a person of sense and good taste to shrink more disgustfully than ever before from the idea of being buried at all. But as regards those eighty coffins, only sixteen have as yet been contributed; and it may be a question with some minds, not merely whether the Grevilles will hold the earldom of Warwick until the full number shall be made up, but whether earldoms and all manner of lordships will not have faded out of England long before those many generations shall have passed from the castle to the vault. I hope not. A titled and landed aristocracy, if anywise an evil and an encumbrance, is so only to the nation which is doomed to bear it on its shoulders; and an American, whose sole relation to it is to admire its picturesque effect upon society, ought to be the last man to quarrel with what affords him so much gratuitous enjoyment. Nevertheless, conservative as England is, and though I scarce ever found an Englishman who seemed really to desire change, there was continually a dull sound in my ears as if the old foundations of things were crumbling away. Some time or other,—by no irreverent effort of violence, but, rather, in spite of all pious efforts to uphold a heterogeneous pile of institutions that will have outlasted their vitality,—at some unexpected moment, there must come a terrible crash. The sole reason why I should desire it to happen in my day is, that I might be there to see! But the ruin of my own country is, perhaps, all that I am destined to witness; and that immense catastrophe (though I am strong in the faith that there is a national lifetime of a thousand years in us yet) would serve any man well enough as his final spectacle on earth.

The direct lineage of the famous figures buried in this beautiful chapel has long been gone. The earldom is now held by the Grevilles, descendants of Lord Brooke, who was killed in the Parliamentary War. They have recently (meaning within the last century) built a burial vault on the other side of the church, designed (as the sexton assured me, nodding with satisfaction) to provide suitable and respectful space for up to eighty coffins. Thank goodness the old man didn’t call them “CASKETS”—a horrible modern term that makes anyone with good sense and taste cringe even more at the thought of being buried at all. As for those eighty coffins, only sixteen have been added so far; and some might wonder not only whether the Grevilles will hold the earldom of Warwick until the full number is reached but also whether earldoms and all sorts of lordships will have disappeared from England long before that many generations have moved from the castle to the vault. I hope not. A titled and landed aristocracy, if it's really a burden or a problem, is so only to the nation that has to carry it; and an American, whose only connection to it is admiring its picturesque impact on society, should be the last person to complain about something that brings him so much free enjoyment. However, despite England's conservatism, and even though I hardly ever met an Englishman who genuinely wanted change, I continually heard a dull noise as if the old foundations of everything were crumbling. Sooner or later—without any disrespectful violence but rather despite all earnest efforts to maintain a disjointed set of institutions that are past their prime—there will be a terrible collapse at some unexpected moment. The only reason I would want to witness it in my lifetime is so I could be there to see it! But perhaps the only ruin I’m meant to see is that of my own country; and that monumental disaster (though I'm confident we still have a national lifespan of a thousand years left) would serve as a fitting conclusion for anyone's time on earth.

If the visitor is inclined to carry away any little memorial of Warwick, he had better go to an Old Curiosity Shop in the High Street, where there is a vast quantity of obsolete gewgaws, great and small, and many of them so pretty and ingenious that you wonder how they came to be thrown aside and forgotten. As regards its minor tastes, the world changes, but does not improve; it appears to me, indeed, that there have been epochs of far more exquisite fancy than the present one, in matters of personal ornament, and such delicate trifles as we put upon a drawing-room table, a mantel-piece, or a whatnot. The shop in question is near the East Gate, but is hardly to be found without careful search, being denoted only by the name of "REDFERN," painted not very conspicuously in the top-light of the door. Immediately on entering, we find ourselves among a confusion of old rubbish and valuables, ancient armor, historic portraits, ebony cabinets inlaid with pearl, tall, ghostly clocks, hideous old china, dim looking-glasses in frames of tarnished magnificence,—a thousand objects of strange aspect, and others that almost frighten you by their likeness in unlikeness to things now in use. It is impossible to give an idea of the variety of articles, so thickly strewn about that we can scarcely move without overthrowing some great curiosity with a crash, or sweeping away some small one hitched to our sleeves. Three stories of the entire house are crowded in like manner. The collection, even as we see it exposed to view, must have been got together at great cost; but the real treasures of the establishment lie in secret repositories, whence they are not likely to be drawn forth at an ordinary summons; though, if a gentleman with a competently long purse should call for them, I doubt not that the signet-ring of Joseph's friend Pharaoh, or the Duke of Alva's leading-staff, or the dagger that killed the Duke of Buckingham (all of which I have seen), or any other almost incredible thing, might make its appearance. Gold snuff-boxes, antique gems, jewelled goblets, Venetian wine-glasses (which burst when poison is poured into them, and therefore must not be used for modern wine-drinking), jasper-handled knives, painted Sevres teacups,—in short, there are all sorts of things that a virtuoso ransacks the world to discover.

If a visitor wants to take home a little souvenir from Warwick, they should check out an Old Curiosity Shop in the High Street, where there's a huge assortment of outdated trinkets, both big and small, many of which are so lovely and creative that you can't help but wonder why they were discarded and forgotten. When it comes to minor preferences, the world changes but doesn’t necessarily get better; in fact, I believe there have been times with much finer creativity than today, especially in personal decoration and the delicate items we place on a living room table, a mantelpiece, or a display shelf. The shop in question is near the East Gate but is hard to find without looking closely, marked only by the name "REDFERN," painted not very prominently in the top light of the door. As soon as you step inside, you find yourself surrounded by a mix of old junk and valuable treasures: ancient armor, historic portraits, ebony cabinets inlaid with pearls, tall, eerie clocks, ugly old china, and dim mirrors in frames of faded grandeur—there are a thousand oddly shaped objects and others that almost scare you with how they resemble things that are no longer in use. It’s impossible to convey the variety of items crammed in so densely that you can barely move without knocking over a large curiosity with a loud crash or accidentally sweeping away a smaller one hitched to your sleeves. All three stories of the entire place are similarly packed. The collection we see displayed must have come together at great cost, but the real treasures of the shop are hidden away in secret places, unlikely to be brought out at a regular request; however, if a gentleman with a sufficiently deep wallet were to ask for them, I have no doubt that the signet ring of Joseph's friend Pharaoh, or the Duke of Alva's leading staff, or the dagger that killed the Duke of Buckingham (all of which I've seen), or any other almost unbelievable item might make an appearance. Gold snuffboxes, antique gemstones, jeweled goblets, Venetian wine glasses (which shatter when poison is poured into them, so they shouldn’t be used for modern wine drinking), jasper-handled knives, painted Sèvres teacups—in short, there are all kinds of things that a collector would scour the world to find.

It would be easier to spend a hundred pounds in Mr. Redfern's shop than to keep the money in one's pocket; but, for my part, I contented myself with buying a little old spoon of silver-gilt, and fantastically shaped, and got it at all the more reasonable rate because there happened to be no legend attached to it. I could supply any deficiency of that kind at much less expense than regilding the spoon!

It would be easier to spend a hundred pounds in Mr. Redfern's shop than to keep the money in my pocket; but I was satisfied with buying a little old silver-gilt spoon that had a unique shape, and I got it at a better price because there wasn’t any story attached to it. I could easily come up with a backstory for it at a much lower cost than regilding the spoon!





RECOLLECTIONS OF A GIFTED WOMAN.

From Leamington to Stratford-on-Avon the distance is eight or nine miles, over a road that seemed to me most beautiful. Not that I can recall any memorable peculiarities; for the country, most of the way, is a succession of the gentlest swells and subsidences, affording wide and far glimpses of champaign scenery here and there, and sinking almost to a dead level as we draw near Stratford. Any landscape in New England, even the tamest, has a more striking outline, and besides would have its blue eyes open in those lakelets that we encounter almost from mile to mile at home, but of which the Old Country is utterly destitute; or it would smile in our faces through the medium of the wayside brooks that vanish under a low stone arch on one side of the road, and sparkle out again on the other. Neither of these pretty features is often to be found in an English scene. The charm of the latter consists in the rich verdure of the fields, in the stately wayside trees and carefully kept plantations of wood, and in the old and high cultivation that has humanized the very sods by mingling so much of man's toil and care among them. To an American there is a kind of sanctity even in an English turnip-field, when he thinks how long that small square of ground has been known and recognized as a possession, transmitted from father to son, trodden often by memorable feet, and utterly redeemed from savagery by old acquaintanceship with civilized eyes. The wildest things in England are more than half tame. The trees, for instance, whether in hedge-row, park, or what they call forest, have nothing wild about them. They are never ragged; there is a certain decorous restraint in the freest outspread of their branches, though they spread wider than any self-nurturing tree; they are tall, vigorous, bulky, with a look of age-long life, and a promise of more years to come, all of which will bring them into closer kindred with the race of man. Somebody or other has known them from the sapling upward; and if they endure long enough, they grow to be traditionally observed and honored, and connected with the fortunes of old families, till, like Tennyson's Talking Oak, they babble with a thousand leafy tongues to ears that can understand them.

From Leamington to Stratford-on-Avon, the distance is about eight or nine miles along a road that I find quite beautiful. I can’t recall any standout features; the countryside most of the way is just gentle hills and dips, offering wide, far-off views of pleasant scenery here and there, and nearly flattening out as we approach Stratford. Any landscape in New England, even the most mundane, has a more distinct outline, and besides, it would have its shimmering blue lakes that we find almost every mile back home, which the Old Country lacks entirely; or it would greet us in the form of small streams that disappear under a low stone arch on one side of the road and reappear sparkling on the other. You don't often find either of these charming aspects in an English landscape. The allure here lies in the lush green fields, the grand roadside trees, the well-maintained woodlands, and the deep historical farming that has transformed the very earth with generations of human effort and care. To an American, there’s a sort of reverence even in an English turnip field, when he reflects on how long that small plot of land has been recognized as a possession, passed down from father to son, often walked upon by notable figures, entirely tamed from wilderness through long familiarity with civilized generations. The wildest aspects of England are mostly domesticated. Take the trees, for example; whether in hedgerows, parks, or what they term forests, they have nothing untamed about them. They’re never ragged; there's a certain graceful restraint even in the most expansive branches, though they spread wider than any self-sustaining tree. They are tall, strong, robust, giving an impression of ancient life, with a promise of many more years ahead, connecting them even more closely to humanity. Someone has known them since they were saplings; and if they stand long enough, they become traditionally observed and respected, intertwined with the fortunes of old families, until, like Tennyson’s Talking Oak, they share stories through a thousand rustling leaves to those who can understand them.

An American tree, however, if it could grow in fair competition with an English one of similar species, would probably be the more picturesque object of the two. The Warwickshire elm has not so beautiful a shape as those that overhang our village street; and as for the redoubtable English oak, there is a certain John Bullism in its figure, a compact rotundity of foliage, a lack of irregular and various outline, that make it look wonderfully like a gigantic cauliflower. Its leaf, too, is much smaller than that of most varieties of American oak; nor do I mean to doubt that the latter, with free leave to grow, reverent care and cultivation, and immunity from the axe, would live out its centuries as sturdily as its English brother, and prove far the nobler and more majestic specimen of a tree at the end of them. Still, however one's Yankee patriotism may struggle against the admission, it must be owned that the trees and other objects of an English landscape take hold of the observer by numberless minute tendrils, as it were, which, look as closely as we choose, we never find in an American scene. The parasitic growth is so luxuriant, that the trunk of the tree, so gray and dry in our climate, is better worth observing than the boughs and foliage; a verdant messiness coats it all over; so that it looks almost as green as the leaves; and often, moreover, the stately stem is clustered about, high upward, with creeping and twining shrubs, the ivy, and sometimes the mistletoe, close-clinging friends, nurtured by the moisture and never too fervid sunshine, and supporting themselves by the old tree's abundant strength. We call it a parasitical vegetation; but, if the phrase imply any reproach, it is unkind to bestow it on this beautiful affection and relationship which exist in England between one order of plants and another: the strong tree being always ready to give support to the trailing shrub, lift it to the sun, and feed it out of its own heart, if it crave such food; and the shrub, on its part, repaying its foster-father with an ample luxuriance of beauty, and adding Corinthian grace to the tree's lofty strength. No bitter winter nips these tender little sympathies, no hot sun burns the life out of them; and therefore they outlast the longevity of the oak, and, if the woodman permitted, would bury it in a green grave, when all is over.

An American tree, if it could compete fairly with an English one of a similar species, would likely be the more beautiful of the two. The Warwickshire elm doesn't have as lovely a shape as those that shade our village street; and regarding the impressive English oak, its shape has a certain hominess, a rounded mass of leaves, and a lack of irregular and varied outlines that makes it look surprisingly like a giant cauliflower. Its leaves are also much smaller than most types of American oak. I don’t doubt that, given the chance to grow freely, with care and cultivation, and protection from being cut down, the American oak would live for centuries as robustly as its English counterpart and end up being the nobler and more majestic tree by the time it reached old age. Still, no matter how much a Yankee might resist admitting it, we have to acknowledge that the trees and other elements in an English landscape capture the observer in so many subtle ways that, no matter how closely we look, we can't find that same charm in an American scene. The lush growth surrounding it makes the trunk of the tree, often gray and dry in our climate, more interesting to observe than the branches and leaves; it’s covered in a vibrant messiness that makes it almost as green as the leaves. Additionally, the stately trunk often has climbing and twining plants, like ivy and sometimes mistletoe, wrapping around it high up, nurtured by the moisture and gentle sunshine, drawing strength from the old tree. We call it parasitic growth; but if that term suggests anything negative, it's unfair to apply it to the beautiful connection between different types of plants in England: the strong tree always ready to support the climbing shrub, lifting it toward the sunlight and feeding it with its own energy when it needs nourishment, while the shrub, in return, rewards its benefactor with a wealth of beauty, adding graceful charm to the tree's impressive height. No harsh winter damages these tender connections, no scorching sun saps their life; therefore, they outlast the oak, and if the lumberjack allowed it, would cover it in a lush green grave when it all comes to an end.

Should there be nothing else along the road to look at, an English hedge might well suffice to occupy the eyes, and, to a depth beyond what he would suppose, the heart of an American. We often set out hedges in our own soil, but might as well set out figs or pineapples and expect to gather fruit of them. Something grows, to be sure, which we choose to call a hedge; but it lacks the dense, luxuriant variety of vegetation that is accumulated into the English original, in which a botanist would find a thousand shrubs and gracious herbs that the hedgemaker never thought of planting there. Among them, growing wild, are many of the kindred blossoms of the very flowers which our pilgrim fathers brought from England, for the sake of their simple beauty and homelike associations, and which we have ever since been cultivating in gardens. There is not a softer trait to be found in the character of those stern men than that they should have been sensible of these flower-roots clinging among the fibres of their rugged hearts, and have felt the necessity of bringing them over sea and making them hereditary in the new land, instead of trusting to what rarer beauty the wilderness might have in store for them.

If there’s nothing else to see on the road, an English hedge might be enough to catch the eye and even touch the heart of an American. We often plant hedges in our own soil, but it’s like trying to grow figs or pineapples and expecting to harvest them. Sure, something grows that we call a hedge, but it doesn't have the thick, lush variety of plants found in the English version, where a botanist would discover thousands of shrubs and lovely herbs that the hedgemaker never even considered planting. Among them, growing wild, are many of the same flowers that our Pilgrim ancestors brought from England for their simple beauty and homely connections, which we’ve been cultivating in our gardens ever since. There’s no softer quality in the character of those tough men than that they recognized these flower roots clinging to the fibers of their rugged hearts and felt the need to bring them across the ocean and make them a part of the new land, rather than relying on whatever rarer beauty the wilderness might offer.

Or, if the roadside has no hedge, the ugliest stone fence (such as, in America, would keep itself bare and unsympathizing till the end of time) is sure to be covered with the small handiwork of Nature; that careful mother lets nothing go naked there, and if she cannot provide clothing, gives at least embroidery. No sooner is the fence built than she adopts and adorns it as a part of her original plan, treating the hard, uncomely construction as if it had all along been a favorite idea of her own. A little sprig of ivy may be seen creeping up the side of the low wall and clinging fast with its many feet to the rough surface; a tuft of grass roots itself between two of the stones, where a pinch or two of wayside dust has been moistened into nutritious soil for it; a small bunch of fern grows in another crevice; a deep, soft, verdant moss spreads itself along the top and over all the available inequalities of the fence; and where nothing else will grow, lichens stick tenaciously to the bare stones and variegate the monotonous gray with hues of yellow and red. Finally, a great deal of shrubbery clusters along the base of the stone wall, and takes away the hardness of its outline; and in due time, as the upshot of these apparently aimless or sportive touches, we recognize that the beneficent Creator of all things, working through his handmaiden whom we call Nature, has deigned to mingle a charm of divine gracefulness even with so earthly an institution as a boundary fence. The clown who wrought at it little dreamed what fellow-laborer he had.

Or, if the roadside doesn’t have a hedge, even the ugliest stone fence (like those in America that seem to stay bare and uninviting forever) is sure to be decorated by Nature’s little handiwork; that caring mother makes sure nothing is left bare, and if she can’t provide full coverage, she at least adds some embellishment. As soon as the fence is built, she adopts and decorates it as part of her original vision, treating the hard, unattractive structure as if it were a beloved idea of her own all along. You might see a little sprig of ivy creeping up the side of the low wall, clinging tightly with its many roots to the rough surface; a tuft of grass takes root between two stones, where a bit of roadside dust has been turned into nourishing soil; a small bunch of ferns grows in another crack; deep, soft, green moss spreads across the top and any uneven spots on the fence; and where nothing else can thrive, lichens stubbornly cling to the bare stones, adding shades of yellow and red to the dull gray. Finally, a lot of shrubs gather at the base of the stone wall, softening its harsh outline; and eventually, as a result of these seemingly random or playful touches, we realize that the kind Creator of all things, working through the agency we call Nature, has chosen to blend a touch of divine beauty even into such a mundane structure as a boundary fence. The worker who built it little imagined the wonderful collaborator he had.

The English should send us photographs of portions of the trunks of trees, the tangled and various products of a hedge, and a square foot of an old wall. They can hardly send anything else so characteristic. Their artists, especially of the later school, sometimes toil to depict such subjects, but are apt to stiffen the lithe tendrils in the process. The poets succeed better, with Tennyson at their head, and often produce ravishing effects by dint of a tender minuteness of touch, to which the genius of the soil and climate artfully impels them: for, as regards grandeur, there are loftier scenes in many countries than the best that England can show; but, for the picturesqueness of the smallest object that lies under its gentle gloom and sunshine, there is no scenery like it anywhere.

The English should send us pictures of parts of tree trunks, the tangled and diverse products of a hedge, and a square foot of an old wall. They can hardly send anything else so characteristic. Their artists, especially from the later school, often try to depict such subjects, but they tend to stiffen the flexible tendrils in the process. The poets do better, with Tennyson leading the way, and often create beautiful effects through a delicate attention to detail, which the nature of the land and climate cleverly encourages. In terms of grandeur, there are more impressive scenes in many countries than the best that England can offer; however, when it comes to the picturesque quality of the tiniest object under its gentle gloom and sunshine, there’s nowhere else quite like it.

In the foregoing paragraphs I have strayed away to a long distance from the road to Stratford-on-Avon; for I remember no such stone fences as I have been speaking of in Warwickshire, nor elsewhere in England, except among the Lakes, or in Yorkshire, and the rough and hilly countries to the north of it. Hedges there were along my road, however, and broad, level fields, rustic hamlets, and cottages of ancient date,—from the roof of one of which the occupant was tearing away the thatch, and showing what an accumulation of dust, dirt, mouldiness, roots of weeds, families of mice, swallows' nests, and hordes of insects had been deposited there since that old straw was new. Estimating its antiquity from these tokens, Shakespeare himself, in one of his morning rambles out of his native town, might have seen the thatch laid on; at all events, the cottage-walls were old enough to have known him as a guest. A few modern villas were also to be seen, and perhaps there were mansions of old gentility at no great distance, but hidden among trees; for it is a point of English pride that such houses seldom allow themselves to be visible from the high-road. In short, I recollect nothing specially remarkable along the way, nor in the immediate approach to Stratford; and yet the picture of that June morning has a glory in my memory, owing chiefly, I believe, to the charm of the English summer-weather, the really good days of which are the most delightful that mortal man can ever hope to be favored with. Such a genial warmth! A little too warm, it might be, yet only to such a degree as to assure an American (a certainty to which he seldom attains till attempered to the customary austerity of an English summer-day) that he was quite warm enough. And after all, there was an unconquerable freshness in the atmosphere, which every little movement of a breeze shook over me like a dash of the ocean-spray. Such days need bring us no other happiness than their own light and temperature. No doubt, I could not have enjoyed it so exquisitely, except that there must be still latent in us Western wanderers (even after an absence of two centuries and more), an adaptation to the English climate which makes us sensible of a motherly kindness in its scantiest sunshine, and overflows us with delight at its more lavish smiles.

In the earlier paragraphs, I've wandered quite a bit off the path to Stratford-on-Avon; I don't recall seeing any of those stone fences I mentioned in Warwickshire, or anywhere else in England, except maybe in the Lakes region or in Yorkshire and the rough, hilly areas north of there. However, there were hedges along my route, as well as wide, flat fields, quaint villages, and old cottages—one of which had its occupant tearing off the thatch, revealing the layers of dust, dirt, mold, weed roots, families of mice, swallows' nests, and swarms of bugs that had accumulated since the last straw was new. Judging by these signs, Shakespeare might have witnessed the thatch being applied during one of his morning strolls out of his hometown; at the very least, the cottage walls were old enough that he could have been a guest there. A few modern villas were also visible, and maybe there were some old mansions not too far away, hidden among trees; it's a point of English pride that such houses usually don’t show themselves from the main road. In short, I don't remember anything particularly remarkable along the way or when approaching Stratford; yet, the image of that June morning shines in my memory, mainly because of the charm of the English summer weather, the truly good days of which are the most delightful that anyone could hope for. Such a pleasant warmth! It might have been a bit too warm, but only enough for an American (a feeling he rarely gets until he's adjusted to the typical chilliness of an English summer day) to feel comfortably warm. And after all, there was an unshakeable freshness in the air that every gentle breeze sprinkled over me like a splash of ocean spray. Such days only need to bring us their own light and warmth to make us happy. No doubt, I couldn't have enjoyed it so much if there wasn't still a latent connection in us Western travelers (even after being away for over two centuries) that makes us aware of a motherly kindness in the briefest sunshine and fills us with joy at its more generous displays.

The spire of Shakespeare's church—the Church of the Holy Trinity—begins to show itself among the trees at a little distance from Stratford. Next we see the shabby old dwellings, intermixed with mean-looking houses of modern date; and the streets being quite level, you are struck and surprised by nothing so much as the tameness of the general scene, as if Shakespeare's genius were vivid enough to have wrought pictorial splendors in the town where he was born. Here and there, however, a queer edifice meets your eye, endowed with the individuality that belongs only to the domestic architecture of times gone by; the house seems to have grown out of some odd quality in its inhabitant, as a sea-shell is moulded from within by the character of its innate; and having been built in a strange fashion, generations ago, it has ever since been growing stranger and quainter, as old humorists are apt to do. Here, too (as so often impressed me in decayed English towns), there appeared to be a greater abundance of aged people wearing small-clothes and leaning on sticks than you could assemble on our side of the water by sounding a trumpet and proclaiming a reward for the most venerable. I tried to account for this phenomenon by several theories: as, for example, that our new towns are unwholesome for age and kill it off unseasonably; or that our old men have a subtile sense of fitness, and die of their own accord rather than live in an unseemly contrast with youth and novelty but the secret may be, after all, that hair-dyes, false teeth, modern arts of dress, and other contrivances of a skin-deep youthfulness, have not crept into these antiquated English towns, and so people grow old without the weary necessity of seeming younger than they are.

The spire of Shakespeare's church—the Church of the Holy Trinity—starts to appear among the trees a bit away from Stratford. Next, we see the rundown old houses mixed with some shabby-looking modern ones; and since the streets are pretty flat, what stands out the most is how ordinary everything seems, as if Shakespeare's talent were strong enough to create vibrant scenes in the town where he was born. However, here and there, you catch sight of a strange building, marked by the unique character that only the homes from long ago can have; the house seems to have been shaped by some quirky trait of its owner, just like a seashell is formed from the inside by its maker; having been built in a peculiar way generations back, it has continued to grow stranger and more charming, similar to how old humorists often do. Also, (as I've often noticed in aging English towns), there seems to be more old folks dressed in breeches and leaning on sticks than you could gather on our side of the ocean by blowing a trumpet and offering a prize for the eldest. I tried to explain this by considering several ideas: for instance, that our new towns are unhealthy for aging and make it die off prematurely; or that our old men have a keen awareness of what’s appropriate and choose to pass away rather than live in awkward contrast to youth and modernity. But maybe the truth is, after all, that hair dyes, false teeth, trendy clothing, and other tricks for looking superficially youthful haven’t made their way into these old English towns, so people age naturally without the exhausting need to appear younger than they are.

After wandering through two or three streets, I found my way to Shakespeare's birthplace, which is almost a smaller and humbler house than any description can prepare the visitor to expect; so inevitably does an august inhabitant make his abode palatial to our imaginations, receiving his guests, indeed, in a castle in the air, until we unwisely insist on meeting him among the sordid lanes and alleys of lower earth. The portion of the edifice with which Shakespeare had anything to do is hardly large enough, in the basement, to contain the butcher's stall that one of his descendants kept, and that still remains there, windowless, with the cleaver-cuts in its hacked counter, which projects into the street under a little penthouse-roof, as if waiting for a new occupant.

After wandering through a couple of streets, I finally arrived at Shakespeare's birthplace, which is even smaller and more modest than any description could prepare you for; it’s amazing how a famous resident can make a place feel grand in our minds, hosting guests in a fantasy palace, until we foolishly want to meet him in the grimy back streets of reality. The part of the building that Shakespeare was connected to isn’t even big enough, in the basement, to hold the butcher's stall that one of his descendants operated, and it's still there, without windows, with cleaver marks on its chopped-up counter, jutting out into the street under a small awning, as if waiting for a new tenant.

The upper half of the door was open, and, on my rapping at it, a young person in black made her appearance and admitted me; she was not a menial, but remarkably genteel (an American characteristic) for an English girl, and was probably the daughter of the old gentlewoman who takes care of the house. This lower room has a pavement of gray slabs of stone, which may have been rudely squared when the house was new, but are now all cracked, broken, and disarranged in a most unaccountable way. One does not see how any ordinary usage, for whatever length of time, should have so smashed these heavy stones; it is as if an earthquake had burst up through the floor, which afterwards had been imperfectly trodden down again. The room is whitewashed and very clean, but wofully shabby and dingy, coarsely built, and such as the most poetical imagination would find it difficult to idealize. In the rear of this apartment is the kitchen, a still smaller room, of a similar rude aspect; it has a great, rough fireplace, with space for a large family under the blackened opening of the chimney, and an immense passageway for the smoke, through which Shakespeare may have seen the blue sky by day and the stars glimmering down at him by night. It is now a dreary spot where the long-extinguished embers used to be. A glowing fire, even if it covered only a quarter part of the hearth, might still do much towards making the old kitchen cheerful. But we get a depressing idea of the stifled, poor, sombre kind of life that could have been lived in such a dwelling, where this room seems to have been the gathering-place of the family, with no breadth or scope, no good retirement, but old and young huddling together cheek by jowl. What a hardy plant was Shakespeare's genius, how fatal its development, since it could not be blighted in such an atmosphere! It only brought human nature the closer to him, and put more unctuous earth about his roots.

The upper half of the door was open, and when I tapped on it, a young woman in black appeared and let me in; she was not a servant but rather refined (an American trait) for an English girl, and was probably the daughter of the elderly lady who looked after the house. This lower room has a floor made of gray stone slabs, which might have been roughly cut when the house was new, but now they are all cracked, broken, and arranged in a bizarre way. It's hard to see how any normal use, over any length of time, could have damaged these heavy stones so badly; it’s as if an earthquake had burst through the floor and then was patched up poorly afterward. The room is whitewashed and very clean but is dreadfully shabby and dingy, poorly constructed, and would challenge even the most imaginative mind to make it seem ideal. At the back of this room is the kitchen, an even smaller space with a similarly rough appearance; it has a big, rough fireplace, accommodating for a large family beneath the blackened chimney opening, and a huge flue for the smoke, through which Shakespeare may have glimpsed the blue sky during the day and the stars shining down on him at night. It’s now a dreary spot where the long-extinguished embers used to glow. A vibrant fire, even if it only filled a quarter of the hearth, could still do a lot to brighten the old kitchen. But we get a gloomy impression of the stifling, poor, dark kind of life that must have been lived in such a house, where this room seems to have been the family's gathering place, lacking space or privacy, with old and young huddled together side by side. What a resilient plant Shakespeare's genius was, how tragically it thrived, since it could flourish in such a setting! It only drew human nature closer to him and enriched the soil around his roots.

Thence I was ushered up stairs to the room in which Shakespeare is supposed to have been born: though, if you peep too curiously into the matter, you may find the shadow of an ugly doubt on this, as well as most other points of his mysterious life. It is the chamber over the butcher's shop, and is lighted by one broad window containing a great many small, irregular panes of glass. The floor is made of planks, very rudely hewn, and fitting together with little neatness; the naked beams and rafters, at the sides of the room and overhead, bear the original marks of the builder's broad-axe, with no evidence of an attempt to smooth off the job. Again we have to reconcile ourselves to the smallness of the space enclosed by these illustrious walls,—a circumstance more difficult to accept, as regards places that we have heard, read, thought, and dreamed much about, than any other disenchanting particular of a mistaken ideal. A few paces—perhaps seven or eight—take us from end to end of it. So low it is, that I could easily touch the ceiling, and might have done so without a tiptoe-stretch, had it been a good deal higher; and this humility of the chamber has tempted a vast multitude of people to write their names overhead in pencil. Every inch of the sidewalls, even into the obscurest nooks and corners, is covered with a similar record; all the window-panes, moreover, are scrawled with diamond signatures, among which is said to be that of Walter Scott; but so many persons have sought to immortalize themselves in close vicinity to his name, that I really could not trace him out. Methinks it is strange that people do not strive to forget their forlorn little identities, in such situations, instead of thrusting them forward into the dazzle of a great renown, where, if noticed, they cannot but be deemed impertinent.

Then I was taken upstairs to the room where Shakespeare is thought to have been born. However, if you look too closely into it, you might find some doubt cast over this and many other aspects of his mysterious life. It's the room above the butcher shop and has one large window made up of many small, irregular panes of glass. The floor is made of rough-hewn planks that fit together with little precision; the exposed beams and rafters on the sides and above show the original marks of the builder's axe, with no sign of an attempt to smooth them out. Again, we have to come to terms with the smallness of the space within these famous walls—something harder to accept in places we've heard about, read about, thought about, and dreamed about than any other disillusioning fact of a misplaced ideal. A few steps—maybe seven or eight—take us from one end to the other. It's so low that I could easily touch the ceiling without even reaching up on my tiptoes if it were a bit higher. This small room has tempted countless people to scribble their names on the ceiling in pencil. Every inch of the sidewalls, even in the darkest nooks and crannies, is filled with similar inscriptions; all the window panes are also covered with signatures, including one that’s said to be Walter Scott's. However, so many people have tried to make their mark near his name that I really couldn’t find it. It seems strange to me that people don’t try to forget their insignificant little identities in such places, instead of pushing them into the spotlight of great notoriety, where, if noticed, they can only be seen as rude.

This room, and the entire house, so far as I saw it, are whitewashed and exceedingly clean; nor is there the aged, musty smell with which old Chester first made me acquainted, and which goes far to cure an American of his excessive predilection for antique residences. An old lady, who took charge of me up stairs, had the manners and aspect of a gentlewoman, and talked with somewhat formidable knowledge and appreciative intelligence about Shakespeare. Arranged on a table and in chairs were various prints, views of houses and scenes connected with Shakespeare's memory, together with editions of his works and local publications about his home and haunts, from the sale of which this respectable lady perhaps realizes a handsome profit. At any rate, I bought a good many of them, conceiving that it might be the civillest way of requiting her for her instructive conversation and the trouble she took in showing me the house. It cost me a pang (not a curmudgeonly, but a gentlemanly one) to offer a downright fee to the lady-like girl who had admitted me; but I swallowed my delicate scruples with some little difficulty, and she digested hers, so far as I could observe, with no difficulty at all. In fact, nobody need fear to hold out half a crown to any person with whom he has occasion to speak a word in England.

This room, and the whole house as far as I could see, are painted white and really clean; there’s none of the old, musty smell that first greeted me in Chester, which often cures Americans of their over-the-top fondness for historical homes. An elderly lady who showed me upstairs had the demeanor and appearance of a refined woman and spoke with impressive knowledge and understanding about Shakespeare. On a table and in chairs were various prints, images of houses and scenes related to Shakespeare's legacy, along with editions of his works and local books about his life and favorite spots, from which this respectable lady probably makes a nice profit. In any case, I bought quite a few, thinking it would be a polite way to thank her for her informative chat and for the effort she put into showing me around the house. I felt a pang (not stingy, but courteous) about offering a straight-up fee to the polite young woman who had let me in; however, I set aside my reservations with some effort, and she seemed to accept hers without any trouble at all. Honestly, no one should hesitate to offer a couple of shillings to anyone they chat with in England.

I should consider it unfair to quit Shakespeare's house without the frank acknowledgment that I was conscious of not the slightest emotion while viewing it, nor any quickening of the imagination. This has often happened to me in my visits to memorable places. Whatever pretty and apposite reflections I may have made upon the subject had either occurred to me before I ever saw Stratford, or have been elaborated since. It is pleasant, nevertheless, to think that I have seen the place; and I believe that I can form a more sensible and vivid idea of Shakespeare as a flesh-and-blood individual now that I have stood on the kitchen-hearth and in the birth-chamber; but I am not quite certain that this power of realization is altogether desirable in reference to a great poet. The Shakespeare whom I met there took various guises, but had not his laurel on. He was successively the roguish boy,—the youthful deer-stealer,— the comrade of players,—the too familiar friend of Davenant's mother,— the careful, thrifty, thriven man of property who came back from London to lend money on bond, and occupy the best house in Stratford,—the mellow, red-nosed, autumnal boon-companion of John a' Combe,—and finally (or else the Stratford gossips belied him), the victim of convivial habits, who met his death by tumbling into a ditch on his way home from a drinking-bout, and left his second-best bed to his poor wife.

I feel it would be unfair to leave Shakespeare's house without honestly admitting that I didn't experience even the slightest emotion while visiting it, nor did my imagination stir. This has often happened to me during my visits to significant places. Any thoughtful reflections I may have had on the subject either came to me before I visited Stratford or were developed afterward. Still, it's nice to think that I've seen the place; and I believe I can now form a clearer and more vivid picture of Shakespeare as a real person after standing on the kitchen hearth and in the room where he was born. However, I'm not entirely sure that this ability to see him so clearly is entirely a good thing when it comes to a great poet. The Shakespeare I encountered there appeared in various forms, but he wasn’t wearing his laurel. He was at times the mischievous boy—the young deer thief—the friend of actors—the too-close companion of Davenant's mother—the careful, thrifty man who returned from London to lend money and live in the best house in Stratford—the easygoing, red-nosed autumn friend of John a' Combe—and finally (unless the local gossip is wrong), the man whose drinking habits led to his downfall, who died after falling into a ditch on his way home from a night out and left his second-best bed to his poor wife.

I feel, as sensibly as the reader can, what horrible impiety it is to remember these things, be they true or false. In either case, they ought to vanish out of sight on the distant ocean-line of the past, leaving a pure, white memory, even as a sail, though perhaps darkened with many stains, looks snowy white on the far horizon. But I draw a moral from these unworthy reminiscences and this embodiment of the poet, as suggested by some of the grimy actualities of his life. It is for the high interests of the world not to insist upon finding out that its greatest men are, in a certain lower sense, very much the same kind of men as the rest of us, and often a little worse; because a common mind cannot properly digest such a discovery, nor ever know the true proportion of the great man's good and evil, nor how small a part of him it was that touched our muddy or dusty earth. Thence comes moral bewilderment, and even intellectual loss, in regard to what is best of him. When Shakespeare invoked a curse on the man who should stir his bones, he perhaps meant the larger share of it for him or them who should pry into his perishing earthliness, the defects or even the merits of the character that he wore in Stratford, when he had left mankind so much to muse upon that was imperishable and divine. Heaven keep me from incurring any part of the anathema in requital for the irreverent sentences above written!

I feel as clearly as the reader does how terrible it is to dwell on these things, whether they're true or false. In either case, they should fade away into the distant past, leaving behind a pure, white memory, just as a sail, even if stained, appears snowy white on the far horizon. But I draw a lesson from these unworthy memories and this representation of the poet, as hinted at by some of the grim realities of his life. It's important for the greater good of the world not to insist on discovering that its greatest figures are, in some lower sense, just like the rest of us, and often a bit worse; because an average mind cannot properly process such a revelation, nor can it grasp the true balance of the great person's good and bad qualities, or how minor a part of him connected with our flawed reality. This leads to moral confusion and even intellectual loss concerning what is best about him. When Shakespeare cursed anyone who would disturb his remains, he might have aimed that curse more at those who pry into his decaying humanity, the flaws or even the virtues of the character he portrayed in Stratford, when he had left humanity with so much that was eternal and divine to contemplate. Heaven protect me from facing any part of the curse in response to the irreverent words I've just written!

From Shakespeare's house, the next step, of course, is to visit his burial-place. The appearance of the church is most venerable and beautiful, standing amid a great green shadow of lime-trees, above which rises the spire, while the Gothic battlements and buttresses and vast arched windows are obscurely seen through the boughs. The Avon loiters past the churchyard, an exceedingly sluggish river, which might seem to have been considering which way it should flow ever since Shakespeare left off paddling in it and gathering the large forget-me-nots that grow among its flags and water-weeds.

From Shakespeare's house, the next stop is to visit his burial site. The church looks both ancient and beautiful, set in the deep green shade of lime trees, with its spire rising above them. The Gothic battlements, buttresses, and large arched windows can be seen dimly through the branches. The Avon lazily drifts past the churchyard, a very slow river that seems to have been pondering its direction ever since Shakespeare stopped splashing around in it and picking the large forget-me-nots that grow among the reeds and water plants.

An old man in small-clothes was waiting at the gate; and inquiring whether I wished to go in, he preceded me to the church-porch, and rapped. I could have done it quite as effectually for myself; but it seems, the old people of the neighborhood haunt about the churchyard, in spite of the frowns and remonstrances of the sexton, who grudges them the half-eleemosynary sixpence which they sometimes get from visitors. I was admitted into the church by a respectable-looking and intelligent man in black, the parish-clerk, I suppose, and probably holding a richer incumbency than his vicar, if all the fees which he handles remain in his own pocket. He was already exhibiting the Shakespeare monuments to two or three visitors, and several other parties came in while I was there.

An old man in short clothes was waiting at the gate; and when he asked if I wanted to go in, he led me to the church porch and knocked. I could have done it just as well myself; but it seems the older folks in the neighborhood linger around the churchyard, despite the scowls and complaints of the sexton, who resents the small amount of charity money—sixpence—that they sometimes receive from visitors. I was let into the church by a well-dressed and smart-looking man in black, probably the parish clerk, who likely has a better income than his vicar if all the fees he collects go into his own pocket. He was already showing the Shakespeare monuments to a couple of visitors, and several other groups came in while I was there.

The poet and his family are in possession of what may be considered the very best burial-places that the church affords. They lie in a row, right across the breadth of the chancel, the foot of each gravestone being close to the elevated floor on which the altar stands. Nearest to the side-wall, beneath Shakespeare's bust, is a slab bearing a Latin inscription addressed to his wife, and covering her remains; then his own slab, with the old anathematizing stanza upon it; then that of Thomas Nash, who married his granddaughter; then that of Dr. Hall, the husband of his daughter Susannah; and, lastly, Susannah's own. Shakespeare's is the commonest-looking slab of all, being just such a flag-stone as Essex Street in Salem used to be paved with, when I was a boy. Moreover, unless my eyes or recollection deceive me, there is a crack across it, as if it had already undergone some such violence as the inscription deprecates. Unlike the other monuments of the family, it bears no name, nor am I acquainted with the grounds or authority on which it is absolutely determined to be Shakespeare's; although, being in a range with those of his wife and children, it might naturally be attributed to him. But, then, why does his wife, who died afterwards, take precedence of him and occupy the place next his bust? And where are the graves of another daughter and a son, who have a better right in the family row than Thomas Nash, his grandson-in-law? Might not one or both of them have been laid under the nameless stone? But it is dangerous trifling with Shakespeare's dust; so I forbear to meddle further with the grave (though the prohibition makes it tempting), and shall let whatever bones be in it rest in peace. Yet I must needs add that the inscription on the bust seems to imply that Shakespeare's grave was directly underneath it.

The poet and his family have what could be considered the best burial spots the church has to offer. They are lined up across the width of the chancel, with the foot of each gravestone close to the raised floor where the altar stands. Closest to the side wall, beneath Shakespeare's bust, is a slab with a Latin inscription dedicated to his wife and covering her remains; then his own slab, bearing the old curse-laden stanza; then that of Thomas Nash, who married his granddaughter; then Dr. Hall, the husband of his daughter Susannah; and finally, Susannah's grave. Shakespeare's grave is the simplest-looking of them all, resembling the flagstones that Essex Street in Salem was paved with when I was a boy. Additionally, unless my eyes or memory are mistaken, there’s a crack across it, as if it has already suffered some of the violence the inscription warns against. Unlike the other family monuments, it has no name, and I’m not sure why it’s accepted to be Shakespeare’s; although, since it’s lined up with those of his wife and children, it could naturally be assumed to belong to him. But then, why does his wife, who died later, take precedence and have the spot next to his bust? And what about the graves of another daughter and a son, who have a better claim to the family plot than Thomas Nash, his grandson-in-law? Couldn’t one or both of them be buried under the nameless stone? But it’s risky to mess with Shakespeare's remains, so I won’t prod any further into the grave (even though the prohibition makes it tempting), and I’ll let whatever bones are there rest in peace. Still, I have to mention that the inscription on the bust seems to suggest that Shakespeare's grave is directly beneath it.

The poet's bust is affixed to the northern wall of the church, the base of it being about a man's height, or rather more, above the floor of the chancel. The features of this piece of sculpture are entirely unlike any portrait of Shakespeare that I have ever seen, and compel me to take down the beautiful, lofty-browed, and noble picture of him which has hitherto hung in my mental portrait-gallery. The bust cannot be said to represent a beautiful face or an eminently noble head; but it clutches firmly hold of one's sense of reality and insists upon your accepting it, if not as Shakespeare the poet, yet as the wealthy burgher of Stratford, the friend of John a' Combe, who lies yonder in the corner. I know not what the phrenologists say to the bust. The forehead is but moderately developed, and retreats somewhat, the upper part of the skull rising pyramidally; the eyes are prominent almost beyond the penthouse of the brow; the upper lip is so long that it must have been almost a deformity, unless the sculptor artistically exaggerated its length, in consideration, that, on the pedestal, it must be foreshortened by being looked at from below. On the whole, Shakespeare must have had a singular rather than a prepossessing face; and it is wonderful how, with this bust before its eyes, the world has persisted in maintaining an erroneous notion of his appearance, allowing painters and sculptors to foist their idealized nonsense on its all, instead of the genuine man. For my part, the Shakespeare of my mind's eye is henceforth to be a personage of a ruddy English complexion, with a reasonably capacious brow, intelligent and quickly observant eyes, a nose curved slightly outward, a long, queer upper lip, with the mouth a little unclosed beneath it, and cheeks considerably developed in the lower part and beneath the chin. But when Shakespeare was himself (for nine tenths of the time, according to all appearances, he was but the burgher of Stratford), he doubtless shone through this dull mask and transfigured it into the face of an angel.

The poet's bust is attached to the northern wall of the church, about a man's height above the chancel floor. This sculpture looks nothing like any portrait of Shakespeare I've ever seen, forcing me to rethink the beautiful, noble image of him that I've always had in my mind. The bust doesn't showcase a beautiful face or a particularly noble head; yet it holds a firm grip on reality and insists you accept it, not just as Shakespeare the poet, but also as the wealthy citizen of Stratford, the friend of John a' Combe, who is buried over there in the corner. I’m not sure what phrenologists would say about the bust. The forehead is average, somewhat receding, with the upper part of the skull rising like a pyramid; the eyes stick out almost beyond the brow. The upper lip is so long it could almost be seen as a deformity, unless the sculptor exaggerated it for artistic reasons, knowing it would look shorter when viewed from below. Overall, Shakespeare probably had a unique rather than an attractive face; it's surprising that, with this bust in front of them, people still hold onto a false idea of his looks, letting painters and sculptors push their idealized visions instead of the real man. As for me, the Shakespeare in my mind's eye will now be a person with a ruddy English complexion, a broad forehead, sharp and observant eyes, a nose that curves slightly, a long unusual upper lip with a bit of a gap below it, and well-defined cheeks beneath the chin. But when Shakespeare was truly himself (which, most of the time, he seemed to be just a common citizen of Stratford), he likely shone through that dull exterior, transforming it into the face of an angel.

Fifteen or twenty feet behind the row of Shakespeare gravestones is the great east-window of the church, now brilliant with stained glass of recent manufacture. On one side of this window, under a sculptured arch of marble, lies a full-length marble figure of John a' Combe, clad in what I take to be a robe of municipal dignity, and holding its hands devoutly clasped. It is a sturdy English figure, with coarse features, a type of ordinary man whom we smile to see immortalized in the sculpturesque material of poets and heroes; but the prayerful attitude encourages us to believe that the old usurer may not, after all, have had that grim reception in the other world which Shakespeare's squib foreboded for him. By the by, till I grew somewhat familiar with Warwickshire pronunciation, I never understood that the point of those ill-natured lines was a pun. "'Oho!' quoth the Devil, ''t is my John a' Combe'"—that is, "My John has come!"

Fifteen or twenty feet behind the row of Shakespeare gravestones is the great east window of the church, now shining with newly made stained glass. On one side of this window, under a sculpted marble arch, lies a full-length marble figure of John a' Combe, dressed in what I believe to be a ceremonial robe, with his hands devoutly clasped. It’s a sturdy English figure, with rough features, a typical everyday man whom we smile to see celebrated in the statues of poets and heroes; but his prayerful position makes us think that the old moneylender might not have had that grim fate in the afterlife that Shakespeare's jab suggested for him. By the way, until I became a bit familiar with Warwickshire pronunciation, I never realized that the point of those mean-spirited lines was a pun. "'Oho!' said the Devil, 'it’s my John a' Combe'"—that is, "My John has come!"

Close to the poet's bust is a nameless, oblong, cubic tomb, supposed to be that of a clerical dignitary of the fourteenth century. The church has other mural monuments and altar-tombs, one or two of the latter upholding the recumbent figures of knights in armor and their dames, very eminent and worshipful personages in their day, no doubt, but doomed to appear forever intrusive and impertinent within the precincts which Shakespeare has made his own. His renown is tyrannous, and suffers nothing else to be recognized within the scope of its material presence, unless illuminated by some side-ray from himself. The clerk informed me that interments no longer take place in any part of the church. And it is better so; for methinks a person of delicate individuality, curious about his burial-place, and desirous of six feet of earth for himself alone, could never endure to be buried near Shakespeare, but would rise up at midnight and grope his way out of the church-door, rather than sleep in the shadow of so stupendous a memory.

Near the poet's bust is a nameless, rectangular, stone tomb, believed to belong to a church official from the fourteenth century. The church has other wall monuments and altar tombs, one or two of which hold the reclining figures of armored knights and their ladies, undoubtedly prominent and respected figures in their time, but now forever appearing out of place and intrusive in the space that Shakespeare has claimed as his own. His fame is overwhelming and overshadows anything else within its physical presence, unless it's somehow connected to him. The clerk told me that no burials happen anywhere in the church anymore. And that's for the best; because I think a person with a sensitive personality, curious about their resting place and wanting six feet of earth just for themselves, could never stand being buried near Shakespeare. They would rise at midnight and find their way out of the church rather than rest in the shadow of such an enormous legacy.

I should hardly have dared to add another to the innumerable descriptions of Stratford-on-Avon, if it had not seemed to me that this would form a fitting framework to some reminiscences of a very remarkable woman. Her labor, while she lived, was of a nature and purpose outwardly irreverent to the name of Shakespeare, yet, by its actual tendency, entitling her to the distinction of being that one of all his worshippers who sought, though she knew it not, to place the richest and stateliest diadem upon his brow. We Americans, at least, in the scanty annals of our literature, cannot afford to forget her high and conscientious exercise of noble faculties, which, indeed, if you look at the matter in one way, evolved only a miserable error, but, more fairly considered, produced a result worth almost what it cost her. Her faith in her own ideas was so genuine, that, erroneous as they were, it transmuted them to gold, or, at all events, interfused a large proportion of that precious and indestructible substance among the waste material from which it can readily be sifted.

I would hardly have dared to add another description of Stratford-on-Avon if I didn't think it would provide a fitting backdrop for some memories of an extraordinary woman. Her work, while she was alive, seemed outwardly disrespectful to the name of Shakespeare, yet, in reality, it aimed to place the most beautiful and prestigious crown on his head, even though she wasn’t aware of it. We Americans, at least, with the limited history of our literature, can’t afford to forget her dedicated and principled use of her remarkable talents, which, if you look at it one way, led to a small mistake, but more fairly considered, resulted in something valuable that was almost worth what it cost her. Her belief in her own ideas was so sincere that, even though they were flawed, it turned them into something precious, or at least mixed a significant amount of that valuable and enduring substance among the debris from which it can easily be separated.

The only time I ever saw Miss Bacon was in London, where she had lodgings in Spring Street, Sussex Gardens, at the house of a grocer, a portly, middle-aged, civil, and friendly man, who, as well as his wife, appeared to feel a personal kindness towards their lodger. I was ushered up two (and I rather believe three) pair of stairs into a parlor somewhat humbly furnished, and told that Miss Bacon would come soon. There were a number of books on the table, and, looking into them, I found that every one had some reference, more or less immediate, to her Shakespearian theory,—a volume of Raleigh's "History of the World," a volume of Montaigne, a volume of Lord Bacon's letters, a volume of Shakespeare's plays; and on another table lay a large roll of manuscript, which I presume to have been a portion of her work. To be sure, there was a pocket-Bible among the books, but everything else referred to the one despotic idea that had got possession of her mind; and as it had engrossed her whole soul as well as her intellect, I have no doubt that she had established subtile connections between it and the Bible likewise. As is apt to be the case with solitary students, Miss Bacon probably read late and rose late; for I took up Montaigne (it was Hazlitt's translation) and had been reading his journey to Italy a good while before she appeared.

The only time I ever saw Miss Bacon was in London, where she rented a room on Spring Street, Sussex Gardens, from a friendly, middle-aged grocer who seemed to genuinely care about her, along with his wife. I was shown up two (and I think three) flights of stairs into a modestly furnished parlor and told that Miss Bacon would be with me soon. There were several books on the table, and I noticed that each one somehow linked to her theory about Shakespeare—Raleigh's "History of the World," a book by Montaigne, a collection of Lord Bacon's letters, and a volume of Shakespeare's plays; on another table, there was a big roll of manuscript, which I assumed was part of her work. Of course, there was a pocket Bible among the books, but everything else was tied to that one dominating idea that had taken over her thoughts. Since this idea had captured both her soul and her intellect, I’m sure she had also formed subtle connections between it and the Bible. Like many solitary students, Miss Bacon probably stayed up late reading and slept in, as I had picked up Montaigne (it was Hazlitt's translation) and had been reading his journey to Italy for quite a while before she showed up.

I had expected (the more shame for me, having no other ground of such expectation than that she was a literary woman) to see a very homely, uncouth, elderly personage, and was quite agreeably disappointed by her aspect. She was rather uncommonly tall, and had a striking and expressive face, dark hair, dark eyes, which shone with an inward light as soon as she began to speak, and by and by a color came into her cheeks and made her look almost young. Not that she really was so; she must have been beyond middle age: and there was no unkindness in coming to that conclusion, because, making allowance for years and ill-health, I could suppose her to have been handsome and exceedingly attractive once. Though wholly estranged from society, there was little or no restraint or embarrassment in her manner: lonely people are generally glad to give utterance to their pent-up ideas, and often bubble over with them as freely as children with their new-found syllables. I cannot tell how it came about, but we immediately found ourselves taking a friendly and familiar tone together, and began to talk as if we had known one another a very long while. A little preliminary correspondence had indeed smoothed the way, and we had a definite topic in the contemplated publication of her book.

I had expected (shame on me, since I had no reason to think this apart from the fact that she was a literary woman) to meet a very plain, awkward, older person, and I was pleasantly surprised by her appearance. She was surprisingly tall and had a striking and expressive face, dark hair, and dark eyes that shone with inner light as soon as she started speaking. Gradually, color came to her cheeks, making her look almost young. Not that she really was; she must have been past middle age, and it wasn’t unkind to think that way because, considering her age and health issues, I could imagine she had once been beautiful and incredibly attractive. Although she was completely removed from society, there was little to no awkwardness in her manner: lonely people usually love to share their pent-up thoughts and often express them as freely as kids with their new words. I can't explain how it happened, but we quickly found ourselves speaking in a friendly, relaxed way, as if we had known each other for a long time. A bit of prior correspondence had indeed eased the way, and we had a specific topic to discuss: the upcoming publication of her book.

She was very communicative about her theory, and would have been much more so had I desired it; but, being conscious within myself of a sturdy unbelief, I deemed it fair and honest rather to repress than draw her out upon the subject. Unquestionably, she was a monomaniac; these overmastering ideas about the authorship of Shakespeare's plays, and the deep political philosophy concealed beneath the surface of them, had completely thrown her off her balance; but at the same time they had wonderfully developed her intellect, and made her what she could not otherwise have become. It was a very singular phenomenon: a system of philosophy growing up in thus woman's mind without her volition,— contrary, in fact, to the determined resistance of her volition,—and substituting itself in the place of everything that originally grew there. To have based such a system on fancy, and unconsciously elaborated it for herself, was almost as wonderful as really to have found it in the plays. But, in a certain sense, she did actually find it there. Shakespeare has surface beneath surface, to an immeasurable depth, adapted to the plummet-line of every reader; his works present many phases of truth, each with scope large enough to fill a contemplative mind. Whatever you seek in him you will surely discover, provided you seek truth. There is no exhausting the various interpretation of his symbols; and a thousand years hence, a world of new readers will possess a whole library of new books, as we ourselves do, in these volumes old already. I had half a mind to suggest to Miss Bacon this explanation of her theory, but forbore, because (as I could readily perceive) she had as princely a spirit as Queen Elizabeth herself, and would at once have motioned me from the room.

She was very open about her theory and would have shared even more if I had shown interest, but since I was aware of my strong doubts, I felt it was fairer and more honest to hold back rather than engage her on the topic. Without a doubt, she was obsessed; her overwhelming ideas about who wrote Shakespeare’s plays and the deep political philosophy hidden in them had completely disrupted her balance. However, at the same time, these ideas had greatly sharpened her intellect and transformed her into something she might not have become otherwise. It was a very unusual situation: a philosophy developing in this woman's mind without her intending it—even against her strong will—replacing everything that originally existed there. Creating such a system purely from imagination and unconsciously building it up was almost as extraordinary as actually discovering it in the plays. But in a certain way, she did find it there. Shakespeare has layers beneath layers, reaching an unfathomable depth suited to every reader’s exploration; his works offer many dimensions of truth, each wide enough to engage a thoughtful mind. Whatever you look for in him, you will find, as long as you’re seeking truth. The various interpretations of his symbols are endless, and a thousand years from now, a whole new generation of readers will have a library of new books, just like we do, in these already old volumes. I was tempted to suggest this interpretation of her theory to Miss Bacon but held back, as I could clearly see she had as regal a spirit as Queen Elizabeth herself and would have immediately asked me to leave the room.

I had heard, long ago, that she believed that the material evidences of her dogma as to the authorship, together with the key of the new philosophy, would be found buried in Shakespeare's grave. Recently, as I understood her, this notion had been somewhat modified, and was now accurately defined and fully developed in her mind, with a result of perfect certainty. In Lord Bacon's letters, on which she laid her finger as she spoke, she had discovered the key and clew to the whole mystery. There were definite and minute instructions how to find a will and other documents relating to the conclave of Elizabethan philosophers, which were concealed (when and by whom she did not inform me) in a hollow space in the under surface of Shakespeare's gravestone. Thus the terrible prohibition to remove the stone was accounted for. The directions, she intimated, went completely and precisely to the point, obviating all difficulties in the way of coming at the treasure, and even, if I remember right, were so contrived as to ward off any troublesome consequences likely to ensue from the interference of the parish-officers. All that Miss Bacon now remained in England for— indeed, the object for which she had come hither, and which had kept her here for three years past—was to obtain possession of these material and unquestionable proofs of the authenticity of her theory.

I had heard a long time ago that she believed the physical evidence supporting her theory about authorship, along with the key to the new philosophy, would be found buried in Shakespeare's grave. Recently, as I understood her, this idea had changed a bit, and was now clearly defined and fully developed in her mind, leading to complete certainty. In Lord Bacon's letters, which she pointed to as she spoke, she found the key to the entire mystery. There were specific and detailed instructions on how to locate a will and other documents related to the group of Elizabethan philosophers, which were hidden (she didn't tell me when or by whom) in a hollow space beneath Shakespeare's gravestone. This explained why there was a strict prohibition against moving the stone. The directions, she hinted, were direct and precise, eliminating any obstacles in accessing the treasure, and even, if I remember correctly, were designed to prevent any annoying consequences from the interference of the parish officials. All that Miss Bacon remained in England for— indeed, the reason she had come here, which had kept her here for the past three years— was to obtain these tangible and undeniable proofs of her theory's authenticity.

She communicated all this strange matter in a low, quiet tone; while, on my part, I listened as quietly, and without any expression of dissent. Controversy against a faith so settled would have shut her up at once, and that, too, without in the least weakening her belief in the existence of those treasures of the tomb; and had it been possible to convince her of their intangible nature, I apprehend that there would have been nothing left for the poor enthusiast save to collapse and die. She frankly confessed that she could no longer bear the society of those who did not at least lend a certain sympathy to her views, if not fully share in them; and meeting little sympathy or none, she had now entirely secluded herself from the world. In all these years, she had seen Mrs. Farrar a few times, but had long ago given her up,—Carlyle once or twice, but not of late, although he had received her kindly; Mr. Buchanan, while Minister in England, had once called on her, and General Campbell, our Consul in London, had met her two or three times on business. With these exceptions, which she marked so scrupulously that it was perceptible what epochs they were in the monotonous passage of her days, she had lived in the profoundest solitude. She never walked out; she suffered much from ill-health; and yet, she assured me, she was perfectly happy.

She shared all these strange ideas in a low, calm voice, while I listened just as quietly, without showing any disagreement. Arguing against such a deeply held belief would have made her shut down immediately, and it wouldn’t have weakened her faith in the existence of those treasures in the tomb at all. If someone could convince her that they weren’t real, I think the poor enthusiast would have had nothing left but to fall apart and give up. She openly admitted that she could no longer be around people who didn’t at least express some sympathy for her views, if not fully agree with them; and since she found little to no sympathy, she had completely withdrawn from the world. Over the years, she had seen Mrs. Farrar a few times but had long since given her up—Carlyle once or twice, but not recently, even though he had always received her warmly; Mr. Buchanan, while he was Minister in England, had visited her once, and General Campbell, our Consul in London, had met her a couple of times for business. Apart from these few encounters, which she noted with such care that you could tell what periods they marked in the monotonous flow of her days, she had lived in deep solitude. She never went out; she struggled with health issues; and yet, she assured me, she was perfectly happy.

I could well conceive it; for Miss Bacon imagined herself to have received (what is certainly the greatest boon ever assigned to mortals) a high mission in the world, with adequate powers for its accomplishment; and lest even these should prove insufficient, she had faith that special interpositions of Providence were forwarding her human efforts. This idea was continually coming to the surface, during our interview. She believed, for example, that she had been providentially led to her lodging-house and put in relations with the good-natured grocer and his family; and, to say the truth, considering what a savage and stealthy tribe the London lodging-house keepers usually are, the honest kindness of this man and his household appeared to have been little less than miraculous. Evidently, too, she thought that Providence had brought me forward—a man somewhat connected with literature—at the critical juncture when she needed a negotiator with the booksellers; and, on my part, though little accustomed to regard myself as a divine minister, and though I might even have preferred that Providence should select some other instrument, I had no scruple in undertaking to do what I could for her. Her book, as I could see by turning it over, was a very remarkable one, and worthy of being offered to the public, which, if wise enough to appreciate it, would be thankful for what was good in it and merciful to its faults. It was founded on a prodigious error, but was built up from that foundation with a good many prodigious truths. And, at all events, whether I could aid her literary views or no, it would have been both rash and impertinent in me to attempt drawing poor Miss Bacon out of her delusions, which were the condition on which she lived in comfort and joy, and in the exercise of great intellectual power. So I left her to dream as she pleased about the treasures of Shakespeare's tombstone, and to form whatever designs might seem good to herself for obtaining possession of them. I was sensible of a ladylike feeling of propriety in Miss Bacon, and a New England orderliness in her character, and, in spite of her bewilderment, a sturdy common-sense, which I trusted would begin to operate at the right time, and keep her from any actual extravagance. And as regarded this matter of the tombstone, so it proved.

I could definitely imagine it; Miss Bacon believed she had received (arguably the greatest gift ever given to humans) a high purpose in life, along with the right abilities to achieve it. And just in case those weren't enough, she had faith that special interventions from Providence were supporting her efforts. This idea kept coming up during our conversation. She thought that she had been led by Providence to her boarding house and had been connected to the kind grocer and his family; honestly, considering how harsh and sneaky most London boarding house owners are, the genuine kindness of this man and his family seemed nothing short of miraculous. Clearly, she also believed that Providence had brought me—a guy somewhat involved in literature—into her life at a crucial moment when she needed someone to negotiate with the booksellers. As for me, even though I wasn't really used to seeing myself as a divine messenger and might have preferred that Providence choose someone else, I had no hesitation in doing what I could to help her. Her book, as I could tell by flipping through it, was quite remarkable and deserved to be presented to the public, which, if wise enough to recognize its value, would appreciate the good in it and be forgiving of its flaws. It was based on a tremendous mistake, but from that foundation, it contained many significant truths. And in any case, whether I could assist her with her literary ambitions or not, it would have been reckless and rude for me to try to disillusion poor Miss Bacon, as her illusions were the foundation for her comfort, joy, and great intellectual power. So I allowed her to dream as she wished about the treasures of Shakespeare's tombstone and to come up with whatever plans she thought would help her obtain them. I sensed a sense of propriety in Miss Bacon, a New England neatness in her character, and, despite her confusion, a solid common sense that I hoped would kick in at the right time and keep her from any real excess. And regarding the matter of the tombstone, that’s exactly how it turned out.

The interview lasted above an hour, during which she flowed out freely, as to the sole auditor, capable of any degree of intelligent sympathy, whom she had met with in a very long while. Her conversation was remarkably suggestive, alluring forth one's own ideas and fantasies from the shy places where they usually haunt. She was indeed an admirable talker, considering how long she had held her tongue for lack of a listener,—pleasant, sunny and shadowy, often piquant, and giving glimpses of all a woman's various and readily changeable moods and humors; and beneath them all there ran a deep and powerful under-current of earnestness, which did not fail to produce in the listener's mind something like a temporary faith in what she herself believed so fervently. But the streets of London are not favorable to enthusiasms of this kind, nor, in fact, are they likely to flourish anywhere in the English atmosphere; so that, long before reaching Paternoster Row, I felt that it would be a difficult and doubtful matter to advocate the publication of Miss Bacon's book. Nevertheless, it did finally get published.

The interview lasted over an hour, during which she opened up freely, as to the only person listening, who was capable of any degree of genuine understanding, and whom she hadn’t encountered in a long time. Her conversation was incredibly engaging, drawing out one’s own thoughts and fantasies from the shy corners where they usually linger. She was truly an impressive speaker, especially considering how long she had kept quiet due to the lack of someone to listen—pleasant, bright, and sometimes intense, giving hints of all the different and easily changeable moods of a woman; and beneath all that, there was a strong and profound current of seriousness, which inspired in the listener a sort of temporary belief in what she herself felt so passionately. But the streets of London don’t support such enthusiasms, nor are they likely to thrive anywhere in the English climate; so, long before reaching Paternoster Row, I sensed that it would be a challenging and uncertain task to promote the publication of Miss Bacon’s book. Still, it eventually did get published.

Months before that happened, however, Miss Bacon had taken up her residence at Stratford-on-Avon, drawn thither by the magnetism of those rich secrets which she supposed to have been hidden by Raleigh, or Bacon, or I know not whom, in Shakespeare's grave, and protected there by a curse, as pirates used to bury their gold in the guardianship of a fiend. She took a humble lodging and began to haunt the church like a ghost. But she did not condescend to any stratagem or underhand attempt to violate the grave, which, had she been capable of admitting such an idea, might possibly have been accomplished by the aid of a resurrection-man. As her first step, she made acquaintance with the clerk, and began to sound him as to the feasibility of her enterprise and his own willingness to engage in it. The clerk apparently listened with not unfavorable ears; but, as his situation (which the fees of pilgrims, more numerous than at any Catholic shrine, render lucrative) would have been forfeited by any malfeasance in office, he stipulated for liberty to consult the vicar. Miss Bacon requested to tell her own story to the reverend gentleman, and seems to have been received by him with the utmost kindness, and even to have succeeded in making a certain impression on his mind as to the desirability of the search. As their interview had been under the seal of secrecy, he asked permission to consult a friend, who, as Miss Bacon either found out or surmised, was a practitioner of the law. What the legal friend advised she did not learn; but the negotiation continued, and certainly was never broken off by an absolute refusal on the vicar's part. He, perhaps, was kindly temporizing with our poor countrywoman, whom an Englishman of ordinary mould would have sent to a lunatic asylum at once. I cannot help fancying, however, that her familiarity with the events of Shakespeare's life, and of his death and burial (of which she would speak as if she had been present at the edge of the grave), and all the history, literature, and personalities of the Elizabethan age, together with the prevailing power of her own belief, and the eloquence with which she knew how to enforce it, had really gone some little way toward making a convert of the good clergyman. If so, I honor him above all the hierarchy of England.

Months before that happened, however, Miss Bacon had moved to Stratford-on-Avon, drawn there by the allure of those rich secrets she thought were hidden by Raleigh, or Bacon, or who knows who, in Shakespeare's grave, protected there by a curse, like how pirates used to bury their gold under the watch of a monster. She rented a simple room and started to frequent the church like a ghost. But she didn’t resort to any tricks or underhanded plans to disturb the grave, which, had she been inclined to entertain such an idea, could possibly have been achieved with the help of a body snatcher. As her first move, she got to know the clerk and began to probe him about the feasibility of her mission and whether he would be willing to be involved. The clerk seemed to listen without disapproval; however, since his role (which the fees from visitors, more common than at any Catholic shrine, made lucrative) could be jeopardized by any wrongdoing, he insisted on being allowed to consult the vicar. Miss Bacon requested to share her own story with the reverend gentleman and appeared to be received by him with great kindness, even managing to leave a certain impression on him regarding the merit of the search. Since their conversation had been confidential, he asked for permission to talk to a friend, who, as Miss Bacon either found out or guessed, was a lawyer. What the legal friend advised her, she never learned; but the negotiations continued and were certainly never ended by an outright refusal on the vicar's part. He was possibly being kind and patiently dealing with our poor countrywoman, whom a typical Englishman would have sent straight to a mental hospital. I can't help but think, however, that her deep knowledge of Shakespeare's life, death, and burial (of which she spoke as if she had stood right at the edge of the grave), along with all the history, literature, and figures of the Elizabethan era, together with the strong conviction in her own beliefs and the persuasive way she expressed them, had actually managed to sway the good clergyman a bit. If that’s true, I hold him in higher regard than all the clergy in England.

The affair certainly looked very hopeful. However erroneously, Miss Bacon had understood from the vicar that no obstacles would be interposed to the investigation, and that he himself would sanction it with his presence. It was to take place after nightfall; and all preliminary arrangements being made, the vicar and clerk professed to wait only her word in order to set about lifting the awful stone from the sepulchre. So, at least, Miss Bacon believed; and as her bewilderment was entirely in her own thoughts, and never disturbed her perception or accurate remembrance of external things, I see no reason to doubt it, except it be the tinge of absurdity in the fact. But, in this apparently prosperous state of things, her own convictions began to falter. A doubt stole into her mind whether she might not have mistaken the depository and mode of concealment of those historic treasures; and after once admitting the doubt, she was afraid to hazard the shock of uplifting the stone and finding nothing. She examined the surface of the gravestone, and endeavored, without stirring it, to estimate whether it were of such thickness as to be capable of containing the archives of the Elizabethan club. She went over anew the proofs, the clews, the enigmas, the pregnant sentences, which she had discovered in Bacon's letters and elsewhere, and now was frightened to perceive that they did not point so definitely to Shakespeare's tomb as she had heretofore supposed. There was an unmistakably distinct reference to a tomb, but it might be Bacon's, or Raleigh's, or Spenser's; and instead of the "Old Player," as she profanely called him, it might be either of those three illustrious dead, poet, warrior, or statesman, whose ashes, in Westminster Abbey, or the Tower burial-ground, or wherever they sleep, it was her mission to disturb. It is very possible, moreover, that her acute mind may always have had a lurking and deeply latent distrust of its own fantasies, and that this now became strong enough to restrain her from a decisive step.

The situation definitely seemed promising. However, Miss Bacon had misunderstood the vicar to mean that there would be no obstacles to the investigation and that he would personally support it. It was scheduled to happen after dark; with all the preliminary arrangements made, the vicar and clerk said they were just waiting for her go-ahead to start moving the heavy stone from the tomb. At least, that’s what Miss Bacon believed. And since her confusion was entirely in her mind and didn’t affect her awareness or clear memory of what was happening around her, I see no reason to doubt it, except for the absurdity of the situation. But amidst this seemingly favorable scenario, her own beliefs began to waver. A doubt crept in about whether she might have confused the place and method of hiding those historic treasures; and once that doubt took hold, she became anxious about the shock of lifting the stone and finding nothing. She examined the surface of the gravestone, trying to assess its thickness without moving it, to see if it could hold the records of the Elizabethan club. She revisited the evidence, clues, riddles, and significant phrases she had found in Bacon's letters and elsewhere, and was now alarmed to realize that they didn't point as clearly to Shakespeare's tomb as she had previously thought. There was certainly a reference to a tomb, but it could be Bacon's, Raleigh's, or Spenser's; and instead of the "Old Player," as she irreverently referred to him, it might very well be any of those three illustrious figures—poet, warrior, or statesman—whose remains lay in Westminster Abbey, or the Tower burial ground, or wherever they were resting, and it was her job to disturb. Moreover, it’s very possible that her sharp mind had always held a subtle, deep-seated skepticism about its own fantasies, and that this skepticism had now become strong enough to prevent her from taking a definitive action.

But she continued to hover around the church, and seems to have had full freedom of entrance in the daytime, and special license, on one occasion at least, at a late hour of the night. She went thither with a dark-lantern, which could but twinkle like a glow-worm through the volume of obscurity that filled the great dusky edifice. Groping her way up the aisle and towards the chancel, she sat down on the elevated part of the pavement above Shakespeare's grave. If the divine poet really wrote the inscription there, and cared as much about the quiet of his bones as its deprecatory earnestness would imply, it was time for those crumbling relics to bestir themselves under her sacrilegious feet. But they were safe. She made no attempt to disturb them; though, I believe, she looked narrowly into the crevices between Shakespeare's and the two adjacent stones, and in some way satisfied herself that her single strength would suffice to lift the former, in case of need. She threw the feeble ray of her lantern up towards the bust, but could not make it visible beneath the darkness of the vaulted roof. Had she been subject to superstitious terrors, it is impossible to conceive of a situation that could better entitle her to feel them, for, if Shakespeare's ghost would rise at any provocation, it must have shown itself then; but it is my sincere belief, that, if his figure had appeared within the scope of her dark-lantern, in his slashed doublet and gown, and with his eyes bent on her beneath the high, bald forehead, just as we see him in the bust, she would have met him fearlessly and controverted his claims to the authorship of the plays, to his very face. She had taught herself to contemn "Lord Leicester's groom" (it was one of her disdainful epithets for the world's incomparable poet) so thoroughly, that even his disembodied spirit would hardly have found civil treatment at Miss Bacon's hands.

But she kept hanging around the church and seemed to have free access during the day, and at least once received special permission for a late-night visit. She went there with a flashlight that barely flickered like a firefly through the darkness that filled the large, shadowy building. Feeling her way up the aisle and toward the chancel, she sat down on the raised pavement above Shakespeare's grave. If the divine poet really wrote the inscription there and cared as much about the peace of his remains as its serious wording suggests, it was time for those decaying relics to stir beneath her sacrilegious feet. But they were safe. She made no effort to disturb them; although, I believe she closely looked into the gaps between Shakespeare's stone and the two next to it, somewhat convinced that her single strength could lift the former if necessary. She shone the weak light of her lantern up toward the bust but couldn't make it visible in the shadow of the vaulted ceiling. If she had been prone to superstitious fears, it’s hard to imagine a situation more deserving of them; if Shakespeare's ghost would rise at any provocation, this was the moment. Yet I genuinely believe that if his figure had shown up in the beam of her flashlight, in his fancy clothing with his eyes fixed on her beneath that high, bald forehead, just like we see him in the bust, she would have confronted him fearlessly and challenged his claims to the authorship of the plays, right to his face. She had ingrained such contempt for "Lord Leicester's groom" (one of her disdainful names for the world’s incomparable poet) that even his disembodied spirit would hardly have received a courteous response from Miss Bacon.

Her vigil, though it appears to have had no definite object, continued far into the night. Several times she heard a low movement in the aisles: a stealthy, dubious footfall prowling about in the darkness, now here, now there, among the pillars and ancient tombs, as if some restless inhabitant of the latter had crept forth to peep at the intruder. By and by the clerk made his appearance, and confessed that he had been watching her ever since she entered the church.

Her watch, although it seemed to have no clear purpose, went on well into the night. Several times, she heard a quiet movement in the aisles: a stealthy, uncertain footstep wandering around in the dark, now here, now there, among the pillars and old tombs, as if some restless spirit from the tombs had come out to see the intruder. Eventually, the clerk showed up and admitted that he had been keeping an eye on her ever since she walked into the church.

About this time it was that a strange sort of weariness seems to have fallen upon her: her toil was all but done, her great purpose, as she believed, on the very point of accomplishment, when she began to regret that so stupendous a mission had been imposed on the fragility of a woman. Her faith in the new philosophy was as mighty as ever, and so was her confidence in her own adequate development of it, now about to be given to the world; yet she wished, or fancied so, that it might never have been her duty to achieve this unparalleled task, and to stagger feebly forward under her immense burden of responsibility and renown. So far as her personal concern in the matter went, she would gladly have forfeited the reward of her patient study and labor for so many years, her exile from her country and estrangement from her family and friends, her sacrifice of health and all other interests to this one pursuit, if she could only find herself free to dwell in Stratford and be forgotten. She liked the old slumberous town, and awarded the only praise that ever I knew her to bestow on Shakespeare, the individual man, by acknowledging that his taste in a residence was good, and that he knew how to choose a suitable retirement for a person of shy, but genial temperament. And at this point, I cease to possess the means of tracing her vicissitudes of feeling any further. In consequence of some advice which I fancied it my duty to tender, as being the only confidant whom she now had in the world, I fell under Miss Bacon's most severe and passionate displeasure, and was cast off by her in the twinkling of an eye. It was a misfortune to which her friends were always particularly liable; but I think that none of them ever loved, or even respected, her most ingenuous and noble, but likewise most sensitive and tumultuous, character the less for it.

About this time, a strange kind of weariness seemed to settle on her. Her hard work was nearly complete, and she believed her grand purpose was just about to be achieved when she started to regret that such an enormous mission had been placed on the vulnerability of a woman. Her faith in the new philosophy was as strong as ever, and so was her belief that she had developed it adequately, ready to share it with the world; yet she wished— or thought so— that it might never have been her duty to carry out this unparalleled task and to struggle weakly under her immense burden of responsibility and recognition. As far as her personal stake in the matter went, she would have gladly given up the rewards of her patient study and labor over so many years, her exile from her country, her separation from family and friends, her sacrifice of health and all other interests to this one pursuit, if it meant she could be free to live in Stratford and be forgotten. She loved the old sleepy town and offered the only praise I ever heard her give to Shakespeare, the man, by admitting that he had good taste in choosing a home and knew how to pick a suitable retreat for someone with a shy but friendly nature. At this point, I can no longer trace the changes in her feelings any further. Because of some advice I thought I needed to give, being the only confidant she had left in the world, I quickly fell under Miss Bacon's severe and intense disappointment and was cast aside in an instant. It was a misfortune that her friends often faced, but I believe that none of them ever loved or even respected her genuine and noble, yet also incredibly sensitive and turbulent, character any less for it.

At that time her book was passing through the press. Without prejudice to her literary ability, it must be allowed that Miss Bacon was wholly unfit to prepare her own work for publication, because, among many other reasons, she was too thoroughly in earnest to know what to leave out. Every leaf and line was sacred, for all had been written under so deep a conviction of truth as to assume, in her eyes, the aspect of inspiration. A practised book-maker, with entire control of her materials, would have shaped out a duodecimo volume full of eloquent and ingenious dissertation,—criticisms which quite take the color and pungency out of other people's critical remarks on Shakespeare,—philosophic truths which she imagined herself to have found at the roots of his conceptions, and which certainly come from no inconsiderable depth somewhere. There was a great amount of rubbish, which any competent editor would have shovelled out of the way. But Miss Bacon thrust the whole bulk of inspiration and nonsense into the press in a lump, and there tumbled out a ponderous octavo volume, which fell with a dead thump at the feet of the public, and has never been picked up. A few persons turned over one or two of the leaves, as it lay there, and essayed to kick the volume deeper into the mud; for they were the hack critics of the minor periodical press in London, than whom, I suppose, though excellent fellows in their way, there are no gentlemen in the world less sensible of any sanctity in a book, or less likely to recognize an author's heart in it, or more utterly careless about bruising, if they do recognize it. It is their trade. They could not do otherwise. I never thought of blaming them. It was not for such an Englishman as one of these to get beyond the idea that an assault was meditated on England's greatest poet. From the scholars and critics of her own country, indeed, Miss Bacon might have looked for a worthier appreciation, because many of the best of them have higher cultivation, and finer and deeper literary sensibilities than all but the very profoundest and brightest of Englishmen. But they are not a courageous body of men; they dare not think a truth that has an odor of absurdity, lest they should feel themselves bound to speak it out. If any American ever wrote a word in her behalf, Miss Bacon never knew it, nor did I. Our journalists at once republished some of the most brutal vituperations of the English press, thus pelting their poor countrywoman with stolen mud, without even waiting to know whether the ignominy was deserved. And they never have known it, to this day, nor ever will.

At that time, her book was going through the publishing process. Regardless of her writing talent, it has to be said that Miss Bacon was completely unqualified to prepare her own work for publication. Among many reasons, she was too passionate to know what to cut. Every page and line felt sacred to her, as everything was written with such deep conviction of truth that it appeared, in her eyes, to be inspired. An experienced publisher, fully in control of her content, would have created a smaller volume filled with eloquent and clever essays—critiques that overshadow other critics' remarks on Shakespeare—insights she believed she had uncovered at the roots of his ideas, which certainly come from a significant depth somewhere. There was a lot of unnecessary material that any capable editor would have removed. But Miss Bacon submitted all her inspiration and nonsense as one big batch, and it resulted in a heavy book that landed with a dull thud at the public's feet and has never been picked up. A few people flipped through a couple of pages as it lay there, trying to kick it further into the mud. They were the routine critics from London's minor periodicals, who, although decent fellows in their own way, are certainly the least sensitive to the sanctity of a book, the least likely to recognize an author’s heart within it, and utterly indifferent to causing damage if they do see it. It’s their job. They can’t act differently, and I never blamed them for it. It wasn't the kind of Englishman to rise above thinking that an attack was being made on England’s greatest poet. In fact, from the scholars and critics of her own country, Miss Bacon might have hoped for fairer appreciation because many of the best among them have more refined education and deeper literary sensibilities than all but the brightest and most profound Englishmen. However, they are not a bold group; they hesitate to think a truth that might seem absurd for fear of having to express it. If any American ever wrote anything in her support, Miss Bacon was never aware of it, nor was I. Our journalists quickly reprinted some of the harshest insults from the English press, flinging their poor countrywoman with borrowed mud without bothering to see if the disgrace was warranted. And they still don't know, to this day, nor will they ever.

The next intelligence that I had of Miss Bacon was by a letter from the mayor of Stratford-on-Avon. He was a medical man, and wrote both in his official and professional character, telling me that an American lady, who had recently published what the mayor called a "Shakespeare book," was afflicted with insanity. In a lucid interval she had referred to me, as a person who had some knowledge of her family and affairs. What she may have suffered before her intellect gave way, we had better not try to imagine. No author had ever hoped so confidently as she; none ever failed more utterly. A superstitious fancy might suggest that the anathema on Shakespeare's tombstone had fallen heavily on her head in requital of even the unaccomplished purpose of disturbing the dust beneath, and that the "Old Player" had kept so quietly in his grave, on the night of her vigil, because he foresaw how soon and terribly he would be avenged. But if that benign spirit takes any care or cognizance of such things now, he has surely requited the injustice that she sought to do him—the high justice that she really did—by a tenderness of love and pity of which only he could be capable. What matters it though she called him by some other name? He had wrought a greater miracle on her than on all the world besides. This bewildered enthusiast had recognized a depth in the man whom she decried, which scholars, critics, and learned societies, devoted to the elucidation of his unrivalled scenes, had never imagined to exist there. She had paid him the loftiest honor that all these ages of renown have been able to accumulate upon his memory. And when, not many months after the outward failure of her lifelong object, she passed into the better world, I know not why we should hesitate to believe that the immortal poet may have met her on the threshold and led her in, reassuring her with friendly and comfortable words, and thanking her (yet with a smile of gentle humor in his eyes at the thought of certain mistaken speculations) for having interpreted him to mankind so well.

The next update I got about Miss Bacon was through a letter from the mayor of Stratford-on-Avon. He was a doctor and wrote to me in both his official and professional capacity, informing me that an American woman who had recently published what he called a "Shakespeare book" was struggling with mental illness. During a moment of clarity, she mentioned me as someone who knew about her family and situation. It’s better not to speculate on what she went through before her mind gave out. No writer had ever been so hopeful as she was; none ever failed so completely. A superstitious thought might suggest that the curse on Shakespeare's tombstone had hit her hard as a payback for even the unfinished plan of disturbing the dust below, and that the "Old Player" remained undisturbed in his grave during her vigil because he foresaw how soon and terribly he'd be avenged. But if that kind spirit still takes note of such things now, he surely acknowledged the injustice she aimed to do him — the kindness she truly showed — with a love and compassion that only he could have. What does it matter that she called him by a different name? He had performed a greater miracle on her than on anyone else. This confused enthusiast recognized a depth in the man she criticized that scholars, critics, and learned institutions dedicated to understanding his unmatched works never thought existed. She honored him in the highest way that all these ages of fame could gather around his memory. And when, not many months after the apparent failure of her lifelong goal, she moved on to a better place, I can’t see why we should doubt that the immortal poet welcomed her at the threshold and guided her in, comforted her with friendly words, and thanked her (with a hint of gentle humor in his eyes at the thought of some misguided theories) for interpreting him to humanity so well.

I believe that it has been the fate of this remarkable book never to have had more than a single reader. I myself am acquainted with it only in insulated chapters and scattered pages and paragraphs. But, since my return to America, a young man of genius and enthusiasm has assured me that he has positively read the book from beginning to end, and is completely a convert to its doctrines. It belongs to him, therefore, and not to me, whom, in almost the last letter that I received from her, she declared unworthy to meddle with her work,—it belongs surely to this one individual, who has done her so much justice as to know what she wrote, to place Miss Bacon in her due position before the public and posterity.

I believe this remarkable book has only ever had one reader. I've only come across it in bits and pieces—isolated chapters and scattered pages. However, since returning to America, a talented and enthusiastic young man has told me that he has actually read the book from start to finish and is fully converted to its ideas. So it rightfully belongs to him, not to me. In one of the last letters I received from her, she said I was unworthy to engage with her work. It truly belongs to this individual, who has done her justice by understanding what she wrote, to position Miss Bacon appropriately in front of the public and for future generations.

This has been too sad a story. To lighten the recollection of it, I will think of my stroll homeward past Charlecote Park, where I beheld the most stately elms, singly, in clumps, and in groves, scattered all about in the sunniest, shadiest, sleepiest fashion; so that I could not but believe in a lengthened, loitering, drowsy enjoyment which these trees must have in their existence. Diffused over slow-paced centuries, it need not be keen nor bubble into thrills and ecstasies, like the momentary delights of short-lived human beings. They were civilized trees, known to man and befriended by him for ages past. There is an indescribable difference—as I believe I have heretofore endeavored to express—between the tamed, but by no means effete (on the contrary, the richer and more luxuriant) nature of England, and the rude, shaggy, barbarous nature which offers as its racier companionship in America. No less a change has been wrought among the wildest creatures that inhabit what the English call their forests. By and by, among those refined and venerable trees, I saw a large herd of deer, mostly reclining, but some standing in picturesque groups, while the stags threw their large antlers aloft, as if they had been taught to make themselves tributary to the scenic effect. Some were running fleetly about, vanishing from light into shadow and glancing forth again, with here and there a little fawn careering at its mother's heels. These deer are almost in the same relation to the wild, natural state of their kind that the trees of an English park hold to the rugged growth of an American forest. They have held a certain intercourse with man for immemorial years; and, most probably, the stag that Shakespeare killed was one of the progenitors of this very herd, and may himself have been a partly civilized and humanized deer, though in a less degree than these remote posterity. They are a little wilder than sheep, but they do not snuff the air at the approach of human beings, nor evince much alarm at their pretty close proximity; although if you continue to advance, they toss their heads and take to their heels in a kind of mimic terror, or something akin to feminine skittishness, with a dim remembrance or tradition, as it were, of their having come of a wild stock. They have so long been fed and protected by man, that they must have lost many of their native instincts, and, I suppose, could not live comfortably through, even an English winter without human help. One is sensible of a gentle scorn at them for such dependency, but feels none the less kindly disposed towards the half-domesticated race; and it may have been his observation of these tamer characteristics in the Charlecote herd that suggested to Shakespeare the tender and pitiful description of a wounded stag, in "As You Like It."

This has been a really sad story. To lighten my memory of it, I'll think about my walk home past Charlecote Park, where I saw the most majestic elms, standing alone or grouped together, scattered around in the sunniest, shadiest, most peaceful way; it made me believe in the long, lazy, sleepy enjoyment these trees must have in their existence. Spread over slow-paced centuries, it doesn’t need to be intense or spark thrills and ecstasies like the fleeting joys of short-lived humans. They were cultivated trees, known and befriended by people for ages. There’s an indescribable difference—as I think I’ve mentioned before—between the tamed, yet by no means weak (on the contrary, richer and more lush) nature of England, and the rough, shaggy, wild nature that offers its richer companions in America. A similar change has occurred among the wildest creatures that live in what the English call their forests. Eventually, among those refined and ancient trees, I saw a large herd of deer, mostly resting, but some standing in picturesque groups, while the stags raised their large antlers as if they’d been taught to enhance the scenic effect. Some were running swiftly, darting between light and shadow and peeking out again, with a few little fawns frolicking at their mothers’ heels. These deer are almost as linked to the wild, natural state of their kind as the trees in an English park are to the rugged growth of an American forest. They have had a certain relationship with humans for countless years; and, quite possibly, the stag that Shakespeare killed was one of the ancestors of this very herd, and may have even been a somewhat civilized and humanized deer, though to a lesser degree than these distant descendants. They are a bit wilder than sheep, but they don’t sniff the air when humans approach, nor do they show much alarm at being pretty close; although if you keep moving toward them, they lift their heads and run away in a sort of playful terror, or something like feminine skittishness, with a vague memory or tradition of having come from a wild lineage. They’ve been fed and protected by humans for so long that they must have lost many of their natural instincts, and I suppose they couldn’t comfortably survive even an English winter without human support. One might feel a gentle disdain for them because of such dependency, but still feels kindly towards this half-domesticated group; and it may have been his observation of these tamer traits in the Charlecote herd that inspired Shakespeare to write the tender and sorrowful description of a wounded stag in "As You Like It."

At a distance of some hundreds of yards from Charlecote Hall, and almost hidden by the trees between it and the roadside, is an old brick archway and porter's lodge. In connection with this entrance there appears to have been a wall and an ancient moat, the latter of which is still visible, a shallow, grassy scoop along the base of an embankment of the lawn. About fifty yards within the gateway stands the house, forming three sides of a square, with three gables in a row on the front, and on each of the two wings; and there are several towers and turrets at the angles, together with projecting windows, antique balconies, and other quaint ornaments suitable to the half-Gothic taste in which the edifice was built. Over the gateway is the Lucy coat-of-arms, emblazoned in its proper colors. The mansion dates from the early days of Elizabeth, and probably looked very much the same as now when Shakespeare was brought before Sir Thomas Lucy for outrages among his deer. The impression is not that of gray antiquity, but of stable and time-honored gentility, still as vital as ever.

At a distance of a few hundred yards from Charlecote Hall, and almost hidden by the trees between it and the road, there's an old brick archway and gatekeeper's lodge. It seems there used to be a wall and an old moat connected to this entrance, with the latter still visible as a shallow, grassy dip along the base of the lawn's embankment. About fifty yards inside the gateway stands the house, forming three sides of a square, with three gables in a row on the front and on each of the two wings; there are also several towers and turrets at the corners, along with protruding windows, vintage balconies, and other charming details that reflect the half-Gothic style in which the building was constructed. Above the gateway is the Lucy coat-of-arms, displayed in its proper colors. The mansion dates back to the early days of Elizabeth I and likely looked very similar when Shakespeare was brought before Sir Thomas Lucy for poaching his deer. The impression isn't one of faded ancientness, but rather of enduring and well-respected gentility, still vibrant as ever.

It is a most delightful place. All about the house and domain there is a perfection of comfort and domestic taste, an amplitude of convenience, which could have been brought about only by the slow ingenuity and labor of many successive generations, intent upon adding all possible improvement to the home where years gone by and years to come give a sort of permanence to the intangible present. An American is sometimes tempted to fancy that only by this long process can real homes be produced. One man's lifetime is not enough for the accomplishment of such a work of art and nature, almost the greatest merely temporary one that is confided to him; too little, at any rate,—yet perhaps too long when he is discouraged by the idea that he must make his house warm and delightful for a miscellaneous race of successors, of whom the one thing certain is, that his own grandchildren will not be among them. Such repinings as are here suggested, however, come only from the fact, that, bred in English habits of thought, as most of us are, we have not yet modified our instincts to the necessities of our new forms of life. A lodging in a wigwam or under a tent has really as many advantages, when we come to know them, as a home beneath the roof-tree of Charlecote Hall. But, alas! our philosophers have not yet taught us what is best, nor have our poets sung us what is beautifulest, in the kind of life that we must lead; and therefore we still read the old English wisdom, and harp upon the ancient strings. And thence it happens, that, when we look at a time-honored hall, it seems more possible for men who inherit such a home, than for ourselves, to lead noble and graceful lives, quietly doing good and lovely things as their daily work, and achieving deeds of simple greatness when circumstances require them. I sometimes apprehend that our institutions may perish before we shall have discovered the most precious of the possibilities which they involve.

It’s a truly delightful place. All around the house and property, there’s a perfect blend of comfort and style, and a wealth of convenience that could only have come from the careful effort and creativity of many generations, each focused on making improvements to the home, where both the past and future create a sense of permanence in the fleeting present. An American might sometimes think that such a long process is the only way to create real homes. One person’s lifetime isn’t enough to achieve such a masterpiece of art and nature—almost the greatest, yet temporary, project entrusted to them; it’s simply not enough, though it might feel too long if they’re discouraged by the thought of needing to make their home warm and inviting for a diverse range of successors, knowing for sure that their own grandchildren won’t be among them. The feelings of yearning implied here come from the fact that, raised in English ways of thinking, as most of us are, we haven’t yet adjusted our instincts to fit the realities of our new lives. Living in a wigwam or under a tent has as many advantages, once we recognize them, as a home beneath the roof of Charlecote Hall. But, unfortunately, our philosophers haven’t yet told us what’s best, nor have our poets described what’s most beautiful in the kind of life we have to lead; so we continue to read the old English wisdom and play the ancient tunes. As a result, when we look at a historic hall, it feels more possible for those who inherit such a home to lead noble and graceful lives, quietly doing good and beautiful things as their daily work, and accomplishing acts of simple greatness when needed. Sometimes, I worry that our institutions might fade away before we realize the most valuable possibilities they hold.





LICHFIELD AND UTTOXETER.

After my first visit to Leamington Spa, I went by an indirect route to Lichfield, and put up at the Black Swan. Had I known where to find it, I would much rather have established myself at the inn formerly kept by the worthy Mr. Boniface, so famous for his ale in Farquhar's time. The Black Swan is an old-fashioned hotel, its street-front being penetrated by an arched passage, in either side of which is an entrance door to the different parts of the house, and through which, and over the large stones of its pavement, all vehicles and horsemen rumble and clatter into an enclosed courtyard, with a thunderous uproar among the contiguous rooms and chambers. I appeared to be the only guest of the spacious establishment, but may have had a few fellow-lodgers hidden in their separate parlors, and utterly eschewing that community of interests which is the characteristic feature of life in an American hotel. At any rate, I had the great, dull, dingy, and dreary coffee-room, with its heavy old mahogany chairs and tables, all to myself, and not a soul to exchange a word with, except the waiter, who, like most of his class in England, had evidently left his conversational abilities uncultivated. No former practice of solitary living, nor habits of reticence, nor well-tested self-dependence for occupation of mind and amusement, can quite avail, as I now proved, to dissipate the ponderous gloom of an English coffee-room under such circumstances as these, with no book at hand save the county-directory, nor any newspaper but a torn local journal of five days ago. So I buried myself, betimes, in a huge heap of ancient feathers (there is no other kind of bed in these old inns), let my head sink into an unsubstantial pillow, and slept a stifled sleep, infested with such a fragmentary confusion of dreams that I took them to be a medley, compounded of the night-troubles of all my predecessors in that same unrestful couch. And when I awoke, the musty odor of a bygone century was in my nostrils,—a faint, elusive smell, of which I never had any conception before crossing the Atlantic.

After my first visit to Leamington Spa, I took an indirect route to Lichfield and stayed at the Black Swan. If I had known where to find it, I would have preferred to settle at the inn previously run by the respectable Mr. Boniface, renowned for his ale in Farquhar's time. The Black Swan is an old-fashioned hotel, featuring an arched passage at the front, with entrance doors on either side leading to different parts of the building. Through this passage, vehicles and riders rumble and clatter over the large stones of the pavement into an enclosed courtyard, creating a loud commotion among the nearby rooms and chambers. I seemed to be the only guest in the spacious establishment, though there might have been a few fellow lodgers hidden away in their separate parlors, completely avoiding the community atmosphere typical of an American hotel. In any case, I had the large, dull, drab coffee room, with its heavy old mahogany chairs and tables, all to myself, and no one to talk to except the waiter, who, like most in his position in England, clearly hadn’t honed his conversational skills. No past experience of solitude, shy habits, or well-established self-reliance could truly dissolve the oppressive gloom of an English coffee room under these conditions, with no book aside from the county directory and no newspaper but a battered local paper from five days ago. So, I buried myself early in a massive heap of old feathers (the only kind of bed in these old inns), let my head sink into a flimsy pillow, and drifted into a troubled sleep, plagued by a jumbled mix of dreams that felt like a collection of the nightmarish worries of all my predecessors on that same restless bed. When I finally woke up, the musty smell of a bygone century filled my nostrils—a faint, elusive scent I had never experienced before crossing the Atlantic.

In the morning, after a mutton-chop and a cup of chiccory in the dusky coffee-room, I went forth and bewildered myself a little while among the crooked streets, in quest of one or two objects that had chiefly attracted me to the spot. The city is of very ancient date, and its name in the old Saxon tongue has a dismal import that would apply well, in these days and forever henceforward, to many an unhappy locality in our native land. Lichfield signifies "The Field of the Dead Bodies,"—an epithet, however, which the town did not assume in remembrance of a battle, but which probably sprung up by a natural process, like a sprig of rue or other funereal weed, out of the graves of two princely brothers, sons of a pagan king of Mercia, who were converted by St. Chad, and afterwards martyred for their Christian faith. Nevertheless, I was but little interested in the legends of the remote antiquity of Lichfield, being drawn thither partly to see its beautiful cathedral, and still more, I believe, because it was the birthplace of Dr. Johnson, with whose sturdy English character I became acquainted, at a very early period of my life, through the good offices of Mr. Boswell. In truth, he seems as familiar to my recollection, and almost as vivid in his personal aspect to my mind's eye, as the kindly figure of my own grandfather. It is only a solitary child,—left much to such wild modes of culture as he chooses for himself while yet ignorant what culture means, standing on tiptoe to pull down books from no very lofty shelf, and then shutting himself up, as it were, between the leaves, going astray through the volume at his own pleasure, and comprehending it rather by his sensibilities and affections than his intellect,—that child is the only student that ever gets the sort of intimacy which I am now thinking of, with a literary personage. I do not remember, indeed, ever caring much about any of the stalwart Doctor's grandiloquent productions, except his two stern and masculine poems, "London," and "The Vanity of Human Wishes"; it was as a man, a talker, and a humorist, that I knew and loved him, appreciating many of his qualities perhaps more thoroughly than I do now, though never seeking to put my instinctive perception of his character into language.

In the morning, after having a mutton chop and a cup of chicory in the dim coffee room, I went out and wandered a bit through the winding streets, looking for one or two things that had mainly drawn me to the place. The city is very old, and its name in the ancient Saxon language has a grim meaning that could apply well, these days and forever, to many unfortunate places in our home country. Lichfield means "The Field of the Dead Bodies,"—a name that the town didn’t take on because of a battle, but which probably arose naturally, like a sprig of rue or other funeral plant, from the graves of two noble brothers, sons of a pagan king of Mercia, who were converted by St. Chad and later martyred for their Christian faith. Still, I wasn’t very interested in the legends of Lichfield’s distant past; I was partly drawn there to see its beautiful cathedral and even more, I believe, because it was the birthplace of Dr. Johnson, whose strong English character I became familiar with early on in my life, thanks to Mr. Boswell. In fact, he feels as familiar in my memory and almost as vivid in my mind's eye as the warm figure of my own grandfather. It's only a solitary child—left to explore the wild ways of learning that he chooses for himself while still not knowing what learning means, standing on tiptoe to grab books from a not-so-high shelf, and then shutting himself in, as it were, between the pages, getting lost in the book as he pleases, and understanding it more through his feelings and emotions than his intellect—that child is the only kind of student who ever creates the sort of closeness I’m thinking of with a literary figure. I don’t really remember caring much about any of the Doctor’s grandiose works, except for his two strong and straightforward poems, "London," and "The Vanity of Human Wishes"; I knew and loved him as a man, a conversationalist, and a humorist, appreciating many of his qualities, perhaps more deeply than I do now, though I never tried to articulate my intuitive understanding of his character.

Beyond all question, I might have had a wiser friend than he. The atmosphere in which alone he breathed was dense; his awful dread of death showed how much muddy imperfection was to be cleansed out of him, before he could be capable of spiritual existence; he meddled only with the surface of life, and never cared to penetrate further than to ploughshare depth; his very sense and sagacity were but a one-eyed clear-sightedness. I laughed at him, sometimes, standing beside his knee. And yet, considering that my native propensities were towards Fairy Land, and also how much yeast is generally mixed up with the mental sustenance of a New-Englander, it may not have been altogether amiss, in those childish and boyish days, to keep pace with this heavy-footed traveller and feed on the gross diet that he carried in his knapsack. It is wholesome food even now. And, then, how English! Many of the latent sympathies that enabled me to enjoy the Old Country so well, and that so readily amalgamated themselves with the American ideas that seemed most adverse to them, may have been derived from, or fostered and kept alive by, the great English moralist. Never was a descriptive epithet more nicely appropriate than that! Dr. Johnson's morality was as English an article as a beefsteak.

Without a doubt, I could have had a wiser friend than him. The environment he thrived in was heavy; his intense fear of death showed just how much messy imperfection needed to be cleared out of him before he could reach a higher state of being. He only engaged with the surface of life and never bothered to dig deeper than a plow’s depth; his insight and wisdom were just a limited perspective. I sometimes laughed at him while standing next to him. Yet, considering that I was naturally inclined toward Fantasy Land, and how much imagination is typically entwined with the mental diet of someone from New England, it might not have been completely wrong during those childish and boyish days to keep up with this slow-moving traveler and consume the coarse food he carried in his backpack. It’s still good nourishment today. Plus, how quintessentially English! Many of the hidden connections that allowed me to appreciate the Old Country so much, and that blended easily with the American ideas that seemed most opposed to them, might have come from, or been nurtured by, the great English moralist. Never has a descriptive label been more perfectly fitting! Dr. Johnson’s morals were as distinctly English as a beefsteak.

The city of Lichfield (only the cathedral-towns are called cities, in England) stands on an ascending site. It has not so many old gabled houses as Coventry, for example, but still enough to gratify an American appetite for the antiquities of domestic architecture. The people, too, have an old-fashioned way with them, and stare at the passing visitor, as if the railway had not yet quite accustomed them to the novelty of strange faces moving along their ancient sidewalks. The old women whom I met, in several instances, dropt me a courtesy; and as they were of decent and comfortable exterior, and kept quietly on their way without pause or further greeting, it certainly was not allowable to interpret their little act of respect as a modest method of asking for sixpence; so that I had the pleasure of considering it a remnant of the reverential and hospitable manners of elder times, when the rare presence of a stranger might be deemed worth a general acknowledgment. Positively, coming from such humble sources, I took it all the more as a welcome on behalf of the inhabitants, and would not have exchanged it for an invitation from the mayor and magistrates to a public dinner. Yet I wish, merely for the experiment's sake, that I could have emboldened myself to hold out the aforesaid sixpence to at least one of the old ladies.

The city of Lichfield (only cathedral towns are called cities in England) is located on a rising site. It doesn’t have as many old gabled houses as Coventry, for instance, but there are still enough to satisfy an American's taste for historical domestic architecture. The locals also have an old-fashioned demeanor and stare at passing visitors, as if the railway hasn't completely accustomed them to the novelty of seeing new faces on their ancient sidewalks. The old women I encountered often curtsied to me; since they appeared respectable and comfortable, and continued on their way without stopping or further greeting, it was clear that their little gesture of respect shouldn’t be interpreted as a subtle request for a sixpence. As such, I took it as a remnant of the respectful and welcoming manners of earlier times when the rare presence of a stranger warranted a general acknowledgment. Coming from such humble sources, I appreciated it even more as a warm welcome from the residents, and I wouldn’t have traded it for an invitation from the mayor and magistrates to a public dinner. Still, I wish, just for the sake of experimentation, that I could have mustered the courage to offer that sixpence to at least one of the old ladies.

In my wanderings about town, I came to an artificial piece of water, called the Minster Pool. It fills the immense cavity in a ledge of rock, whence the building-materials of the cathedral were quarried out a great many centuries ago. I should never have guessed the little lake to be of man's creation, so very pretty and quietly picturesque an object has it grown to be, with its green banks, and the old trees hanging over its glassy surface, in which you may see reflected some of the battlements of the majestic structure that once lay here in unshaped stone. Some little children stood on the edge of the Pool, angling with pin-hooks; and the scene reminded me (though really to be quite fair with the reader, the gist of the analogy has now escaped me) of that mysterious lake in the Arabian Nights, which had once been a palace and a city, and where a fisherman used to pull out the former inhabitants in the guise of enchanted fishes. There is no need of fanciful associations to make the spot interesting. It was in the porch of one of the houses, in the street that runs beside the Minster Pool, that Lord Brooke was slain, in the time of the Parliamentary war, by a shot from the battlements of the cathedral, which was then held by the Royalists as a fortress. The incident is commemorated by an inscription on a stone, inlaid into the wall of the house.

In my strolls around town, I came across an artificial body of water, known as the Minster Pool. It fills a large hollow in a rock ledge, where the materials for the cathedral were quarried many centuries ago. I would never have guessed this little lake was made by humans; it looks so beautiful and picturesque now, with its green banks and the old trees hanging over its smooth surface, where you can see reflections of some of the battlements of the grand structure that once stood here as an unshaped stone. Some little kids were standing by the edge of the Pool, fishing with pin-hooks; and the scene reminded me (though to be honest, I can't quite recall the comparison now) of that mysterious lake in the Arabian Nights, which used to be a palace and a city, where a fisherman used to pull out the former inhabitants in the form of enchanted fish. You don't need any fanciful connections to make this spot interesting. It was in the porch of one of the houses on the street beside the Minster Pool that Lord Brooke was killed during the Parliamentary war, shot from the battlements of the cathedral, which was then held by the Royalists as a fortress. The incident is remembered with an inscription on a stone set into the wall of the house.

I know not what rank the Cathedral of Lichfield holds among its sister edifices in England, as a piece of magnificent architecture. Except that of Chester (the grim and simple nave of which stands yet unrivalled in my memory), and one or two small ones in North Wales, hardly worthy of the name of cathedrals, it was the first that I had seen. To my uninstructed vision, it seemed the object best worth gazing at in the whole world; and now, after beholding a great many more, I remember it with less prodigal admiration only because others are as magnificent as itself. The traces remaining in my memory represent it as airy rather than massive. A multitude of beautiful shapes appeared to be comprehended within its single outline; it was a kind of kaleidoscopic mystery, so rich a variety of aspects did it assume from each altered point of view, through the presentation of a different face, and the rearrangement of its peaks and pinnacles and the three battlemented towers, with the spires that shot heavenward from all three, but one loftier than its fellows. Thus it impressed you, at every change, as a newly created structure of the passing moment, in which yet you lovingly recognized the half-vanished structure of the instant before, and felt, moreover, a joyful faith in the indestructible existence of all this cloudlike vicissitude. A Gothic cathedral is surely the most wonderful work which mortal man has yet achieved, so vast, so intricate, and so profoundly simple, with such strange, delightful recesses in its grand figure, so difficult to comprehend within one idea, and yet all so consonant that it ultimately draws the beholder and his universe into its harmony. It is the only thing in the world that is vast enough and rich enough.

I don't know what rank the Cathedral of Lichfield holds among other cathedrals in England as a piece of stunning architecture. Other than Chester (whose dark and simple nave is still unmatched in my memory) and a couple of smaller ones in North Wales that barely deserve the title of cathedrals, it was the first one I had ever seen. To my untrained eye, it seemed to be the most beautiful thing worth looking at in the entire world; and now, after seeing many more, I remember it with less extravagant admiration only because others are just as magnificent. The memories I have of it make it seem more airy than heavy. A multitude of beautiful shapes appeared to be captured within its single outline; it was like a kaleidoscopic mystery, showcasing such a rich variety of perspectives from each different angle, presenting a different face, and rearranging its peaks, pinnacles, and three battlemented towers, with the spires shooting up towards the sky from all three, one taller than the others. It struck you at every shift as if it were a newly created structure of the moment, yet you still lovingly recognized the fading structure of the moment before and felt a joyful belief in the lasting existence of this cloudlike change. A Gothic cathedral is surely the most incredible work that human beings have ever created, so vast, so intricate, and so deeply simple, with such strange, delightful recesses in its grand form, so hard to grasp as a single idea, yet all so harmonious that it ultimately draws the viewer and their universe into its rhythm. It’s the only thing in the world that is big enough and rich enough.

Not that I felt, or was worthy to feel, an unmingled enjoyment in gazing at this wonder. I could not elevate myself to its spiritual height, any more than I could have climbed from the ground to the summit of one of its pinnacles. Ascending but a little way, I continually fell back and lay in a kind of despair, conscious that a flood of uncomprehended beauty was pouring down upon me, of which I could appropriate only the minutest portion. After a hundred years, incalculably as my higher sympathies might be invigorated by so divine an employment, I should still be a gazer from below and at an awful distance, as yet remotely excluded from the interior mystery. But it was something gained, even to have that painful sense of my own limitations, and that half-smothered yearning to soar beyond them. The cathedral showed me how earthly I was, but yet whispered deeply of immortality. After all, this was probably the best lesson that it could bestow, and, taking it as thoroughly as possible home to my heart, I was fain to be content. If the truth must be told, my ill-trained enthusiasm soon flagged, and I began to lose the vision of a spiritual or ideal edifice behind the time-worn and weather-stained front of the actual structure. Whenever that is the case, it is most reverential to look another way; but the mood disposes one to minute investigation, and I took advantage of it to examine the intricate and multitudinous adornment that was lavished on the exterior wall of this great church. Everywhere, there were empty niches where statues had been thrown down, and here and there a statue still lingered in its niche; and over the chief entrance, and extending across the whole breadth of the building, was a row of angels, sainted personages, martyrs, and kings, sculptured in reddish stone. Being much corroded by the moist English atmosphere, during four or five hundred winters that they had stood there, these benign and majestic figures perversely put me in mind of the appearance of a sugar image, after a child has been holding it in his mouth. The venerable infant Time has evidently found them sweet morsels.

Not that I felt, or deserved to feel, pure enjoyment in staring at this wonder. I couldn't lift myself to its spiritual heights any more than I could climb from the ground to the top of one of its peaks. Ascending just a little, I kept falling back and lying in a sort of despair, aware that a wave of incomprehensible beauty was washing over me, of which I could grasp only the tiniest part. Even after a hundred years, no matter how much my higher sensitivities might be strengthened by such a divine experience, I'd still be a spectator from below, at a terrifying distance, still far from understanding its inner mysteries. But it was something to gain, even that painful awareness of my own limitations and that suppressed yearning to rise above them. The cathedral revealed to me how earthly I was, yet it whispered profoundly of immortality. After all, this was probably the best lesson it could offer, and embracing it as fully as I could, I tried to be content. To be honest, my poorly trained enthusiasm soon waned, and I started to lose the vision of a spiritual or ideal structure behind the old and weathered facade of the actual building. When that happens, it's usually best to look away; but my mood led me to examine closely, and I took the opportunity to investigate the intricate and numerous decorations that adorned the exterior wall of this grand church. Everywhere, there were empty niches where statues had been knocked down, and here and there a statue still remained in its niche; above the main entrance, stretching across the entire width of the building, was a row of angels, saints, martyrs, and kings, carved from reddish stone. Having been worn away by the damp English climate over four or five hundred winters, these kind and majestic figures oddly reminded me of what a sugar figure looks like after a child has held it in their mouth. Time, the ancient infant, had clearly found them to be sweet treats.

Inside of the minster there is a long and lofty nave, transepts of the same height, and side-aisles and chapels, dim nooks of holiness, where in Catholic times the lamps were continually burning before the richly decorated shrines of saints. In the audacity of my ignorance, as I humbly acknowledge it to have been, I criticised this great interior as too much broken into compartments, and shorn of half its rightful impressiveness by the interposition of a screen betwixt the nave and chancel. It did not spread itself in breadth, but ascended to the roof in lofty narrowness. One large body of worshippers might have knelt down in the nave, others in each of the transepts, and smaller ones in the side-aisles, besides an indefinite number of esoteric enthusiasts in the mysterious sanctities beyond the screen. Thus it seemed to typify the exclusiveness of sects rather than the worldwide hospitality of genuine religion. I had imagined a cathedral with a scope more vast. These Gothic aisles, with their groined arches overhead, supported by clustered pillars in long vistas up and down, were venerable and magnificent, but included too much of the twilight of that monkish gloom out of which they grew. It is no matter whether I ever came to a more satisfactory appreciation of this kind of architecture; the only value of my strictures being to show the folly of looking at noble objects in the wrong mood, and the absurdity of a new visitant pretending to hold any opinion whatever on such subjects, instead of surrendering himself to the old builder's influence with childlike simplicity.

Inside the minster, there's a long and towering nave, with transepts that are just as high, and side aisles and chapels, dim corners of holiness where, in Catholic times, the lamps constantly burned before the beautifully adorned shrines of saints. In my bold ignorance, which I humbly admit it was, I criticized this grand interior for being too divided into sections and lacking half its rightful grandeur due to the screen separating the nave from the chancel. It didn't spread out wide but instead shot up to the roof in a narrow height. A large group of worshippers could have knelt in the nave, others in each of the transepts, and smaller groups in the side aisles, plus an unknown number of devoted individuals in the mysterious sanctities beyond the screen. So, it seemed to represent the exclusiveness of sects rather than the worldwide openness of true religion. I had envisioned a cathedral with a much more expansive feeling. These Gothic aisles, with their ribbed arches overhead supported by clustered pillars stretching in long views both ways, were ancient and magnificent but contained too much of the dimness of the monkish gloom from which they originated. It doesn't really matter whether I ever came to a better appreciation of this style of architecture; the only value of my criticisms lies in demonstrating the foolishness of viewing grand objects in the wrong mindset and the absurdity of a newcomer pretending to have any opinion on such matters instead of simply embracing the old builder's influence with childlike sincerity.

A great deal of white marble decorates the old stonework of the aisles, in the shape of altars, obelisks, sarcophagi, and busts. Most of these memorials are commemorative of people locally distinguished, especially the deans and canons of the Cathedral, with their relatives and families; and I found but two monuments of personages whom I had ever heard of,— one being Gilbert Wahnesley and the other Lady Mary Wortley Montagu, a literary acquaintance of my boyhood. It was really pleasant to meet her there; for after a friend has lain in the grave far into the second century, she would be unreasonable to require any melancholy emotions in a chance interview at her tombstone. It adds a rich charm to sacred edifices, this time-honored custom of burial in churches, after a few years, at least, when the mortal remains have turned to dust beneath the pavement, and the quaint devices and inscriptions still speak to you above. The statues, that stood or reclined in several recesses of the Cathedral, had a kind of life, and I regarded them with an odd sort of deference, as if they were privileged denizens of the precinct. It was singular, too, how the memorial of the latest buried person, the man whose features went familiar in the streets of Lichfield only yesterday, seemed precisely as much at home here as his mediaeval predecessors. Henceforward he belonged in the Cathedral like one of its original pillars. Methought this impression in my fancy might be the shadow of a spiritual fact. The dying melt into the great multitude of the Departed as quietly as a drop of water into the ocean, and, it may be are conscious of no unfamiliarity with their new circumstances, but immediately become aware of an insufferable strangeness in the world which they have quitted. Death has not taken them away, but brought them home.

A lot of white marble decorates the old stonework of the aisles, in the form of altars, obelisks, sarcophagi, and busts. Most of these memorials honor notable local figures, especially the deans and canons of the Cathedral, along with their relatives and families. I found only two monuments of people I had ever heard of—one was Gilbert Wahnesley, and the other was Lady Mary Wortley Montagu, a literary figure from my childhood. It was genuinely nice to encounter her there; after a friend has been buried for almost two centuries, it would be unreasonable to expect any sad feelings in a random meeting at her tombstone. This time-honored custom of burial in churches adds a rich charm to sacred buildings, especially after a few years when the physical remains have turned to dust beneath the pavement, and the unique designs and inscriptions still communicate with you above. The statues that stood or lay in various alcoves of the Cathedral had a kind of life, and I viewed them with a strange kind of respect, as if they were privileged inhabitants of the space. It was also unusual how the memorial of the most recently buried person, the man whose face was familiar on the streets of Lichfield just yesterday, seemed just as much at home here as his medieval predecessors. From now on, he belonged in the Cathedral like one of its original pillars. I thought this feeling in my mind might be a reflection of a spiritual truth. The dying merge into the vast multitude of the Departed as quietly as a drop of water blends into the ocean, and they might not feel any unfamiliarity with their new reality, but instead become acutely aware of the strangeness of the world they left behind. Death hasn’t taken them away; it has brought them home.

The vicissitudes and mischances of sublunary affairs, however, have not ceased to attend upon these marble inhabitants; for I saw the upper fragment of a sculptured lady, in a very old-fashioned garb, the lower half of whom had doubtless been demolished by Cromwell's soldiers when they took the Minster by storm. And there lies the remnant of this devout lady on her slab, ever since the outrage, as for centuries before, with a countenance of divine serenity and her hands clasped in prayer, symbolizing a depth of religious faith which no earthly turmoil or calamity could disturb. Another piece of sculpture (apparently a favorite subject in the Middle Ages, for I have seen several like it in other cathedrals) was a reclining skeleton, as faithfully representing an open-work of bones as could well be expected in a solid block of marble, and at a period, moreover, when the mysteries of the human frame were rather to be guessed at than revealed. Whatever the anatomical defects of his production, the old sculptor had succeeded in making it ghastly beyond measure. How much mischief has been wrought upon us by this invariable gloom of the Gothic imagination; flinging itself like a death-scented pall over our conceptions of the future state, smothering our hopes, hiding our sky, and inducing dismal efforts to raise the harvest of immortality out of what is most opposite to it,—the grave!

The ups and downs of earthly matters, however, have not stopped affecting these marble figures. I saw the top part of a sculpted woman in very outdated clothing; the lower half was likely destroyed by Cromwell's soldiers when they stormed the Minster. And there she lies, the remains of this devoted lady on her slab, unchanged since that attack, just like for centuries before, with a face of divine calm and her hands together in prayer, representing a deep religious faith that no worldly trouble or disaster could shake. Another sculpture, seemingly a popular theme in the Middle Ages since I've seen several like it in other cathedrals, was a reclining skeleton, depicted with a detailed arrangement of bones as well as could be achieved in solid marble, especially at a time when the mysteries of the human body were more speculative than understood. Despite any anatomical flaws in his work, the old sculptor made it terrifying beyond measure. How much harm has been done to us by this persistent gloom of Gothic imagination, draping itself like a deathly shroud over our ideas of the afterlife, suppressing our hopes, obscuring our skies, and leading to gloomy attempts to harvest immortality from what is most opposed to it—the grave!

The Cathedral service is performed twice every day at ten o'clock and at four. When I first entered, the choristers (young and old, but mostly, I think, boys, with voices inexpressibly sweet and clear, and as fresh as bird-notes) were just winding up their harmonious labors, and soon came thronging through a side-door from the chancel into the nave. They were all dressed in long white robes, and looked like a peculiar order of beings, created on purpose to hover between the roof and pavement of that dim, consecrated edifice, and illuminate it with divine melodies, reposing themselves, meanwhile, on the heavy grandeur of the organ-tones like cherubs on a golden cloud. All at once, however, one of the cherubic multitude pulled off his white gown, thus transforming himself before my very eyes into a commonplace youth of the day, in modern frock-coat and trousers of a decidedly provincial cut. This absurd little incident, I verily believe, had a sinister effect in putting me at odds with the proper influences of the Cathedral, nor could I quite recover a suitable frame of mind during my stay there. But, emerging into the open air, I began to be sensible that I had left a magnificent interior behind me, and I have never quite lost the perception and enjoyment of it in these intervening years.

The Cathedral service takes place twice a day, at ten o'clock and at four. When I first walked in, the choir boys, young and old but mostly boys, with voices sweet and clear like birdsong, were finishing their beautiful singing. They soon flooded through a side door from the chancel into the nave. Dressed in long white robes, they resembled a unique order of beings created to float between the ceiling and floor of that dim, sacred space, lighting it up with divine music while resting on the rich sound of the organ like cherubs on a golden cloud. Suddenly, one of the cherubic crowd took off his white robe, instantly turning into an ordinary young man in a modern frock coat and somewhat outdated trousers. I truly believe this silly little moment unsettled me and made it hard to connect with the true spirit of the Cathedral, and I couldn’t quite find the right mindset during my visit there. However, once I stepped outside, I realized I had left behind a magnificent interior, and I haven’t entirely lost the feeling and appreciation of it over the years.

A large space in the immediate neighborhood of the Cathedral is called the Close, and comprises beautifully kept lawns and a shadowy walk bordered by the dwellings of the ecclesiastical dignitaries of the diocese. All this row of episcopal, canonical, and clerical residences has an air of the deepest quiet, repose, and well-protected though not inaccessible seclusion. They seemed capable of including everything that a saint could desire, and a great many more things than most of us sinners generally succeed in acquiring. Their most marked feature is a dignified comfort, looking as if no disturbance or vulgar intrusiveness could ever cross their thresholds, encroach upon their ornamented lawns, or straggle into the beautiful gardens that surround them with flower-beds and rich clumps of shrubbery. The episcopal palace is a stately mansion of stone, built somewhat in the Italian style, and bearing on its front the figures 1637, as the date of its erection. A large edifice of brick, which, if I remember, stood next to the palace, I took to be the residence of the second dignitary of the Cathedral; and, in that case, it must have been the youthful home of Addison, whose father was Dean of Lichfield. I tried to fancy his figure on the delightful walk that extends in front of those priestly abodes, from which and the interior lawns it is separated by an open-work iron fence, lined with rich old shrubbery, and overarched by a minster-aisle of venerable trees. This path is haunted by the shades of famous personages who have formerly trodden it. Johnson must have been familiar with it, both as a boy, and in his subsequent visits to Lichfield, an illustrious old man. Miss Seward, connected with so many literary reminiscences, lived in one of the adjacent houses. Tradition says that it was a favorite spot of Major Andre, who used to pace to and fro under these trees waiting, perhaps, to catch a last angel-glimpse of Honoria Sueyd, before he crossed the ocean to encounter his dismal doom from an American court-martial. David Garrick, no doubt, scampered along the path in his boyish days, and, if he was an early student of the drama, must often have thought of those two airy characters of the "Beaux' Stratagem," Archer and Aimwell, who, on this very ground, after attending service at the cathedral, contrive to make acquaintance with the ladies of the comedy. These creatures of mere fiction have as positive a substance now as the sturdy old figure of Johnson himself. They live, while realities have died. The shadowy walk still glistens with their gold-embroidered memories.

A large area right by the Cathedral is called the Close, featuring well-maintained lawns and a shaded pathway lined with the homes of the church leaders of the diocese. This row of episcopal, canonical, and clerical residences has a vibe of deep tranquility, comfort, and a secure yet not unreachable privacy. They seem to offer everything a saint could wish for, plus many things that most of us sinners usually don't manage to have. Their most noticeable quality is a dignified comfort, suggesting that no disturbances or rude interruptions could ever enter their doorsteps, intrude upon their manicured lawns, or wander into the lovely gardens surrounding them, filled with flowerbeds and lush shrubbery. The episcopal palace is a grand stone mansion, built somewhat in the Italian style, with the year 1637 marked on its front as the year it was constructed. A large brick building next to the palace seems to be the home of the second-highest official of the Cathedral; if that’s true, it must have been the childhood home of Addison, whose father was the Dean of Lichfield. I imagined him walking along the lovely path in front of those priestly homes, which is separated from the inner lawns by an open iron fence adorned with rich old shrubbery and shaded by a cathedral-like row of ancient trees. This path is frequented by the spirits of notable figures who walked it before. Johnson must have known it well, both as a boy and later during his visits to Lichfield as a distinguished old man. Miss Seward, who is connected to many literary memories, lived in one of the nearby houses. Tradition has it that this was a favorite spot of Major Andre, who used to stroll back and forth under these trees, perhaps waiting for a last glimpse of Honoria Seward before he crossed the ocean to meet his grim fate at the hands of an American court-martial. David Garrick undoubtedly ran along this path in his youth, and if he was an early student of drama, he must have often thought of the two charming characters from the "Beaux' Stratagem," Archer and Aimwell, who, on this very ground, after attending service at the cathedral, managed to meet the ladies from the comedy. These fictional characters feel as real now as the solid old figure of Johnson himself. They live on, while the realities have faded away. The shaded path still sparkles with their golden memories.

Seeking for Johnson's birthplace, I found it in St. Mary's Square, which is not so much a square as the mere widening of a street. The house is tall and thin, of three stories, with a square front and a roof rising steep and high. On a side-view, the building looks as if it had been cut in two in the midst, there being no slope of the roof on that side. A ladder slanted against the wall, and a painter was giving a livelier line to the plaster. In a corner-room of the basement, where old Michael Johnson may be supposed to have sold books, is now what we should call a dry-goods store, or, according to the English phrase, a mercer's and haberdasher's shop. The house has a private entrance on a cross-street, the door being accessible by several much-worn stone steps, which are bordered by an iron balustrade. I set my foot on the steps and laid my hand on the balustrade, where Johnson's hand and foot must many a time have been, and ascending to the door, I knocked once, and again, and again, and got no admittance. Going round to the shop-entrance, I tried to open it, but found it as fast bolted as the gate of Paradise. It is mortifying to be so balked in one's little enthusiasms; but looking round in quest of somebody to make inquiries of, I was a good deal consoled by the sight of Dr. Johnson himself, who happened, just at that moment, to be sitting at his case nearly in the middle of St. Mary's Square, with his face turned towards his father's house.

Looking for Johnson's birthplace, I found it in St. Mary's Square, which is less of a square and more just a widening of the street. The house is tall and narrow, three stories high, with a square front and a steep, high roof. From the side, the building looks like it was sliced in half, as there's no slope on that side of the roof. A ladder leaned against the wall, and a painter was adding some lively touches to the plaster. In a corner room of the basement, where old Michael Johnson probably sold books, there is now what we would call a dry-goods store, or in British terms, a mercer's and haberdasher's shop. The house has a private entrance on a side street, with a door accessed by several worn stone steps, bordered by an iron railing. I stepped onto the steps and put my hand on the railing, where Johnson’s hand and foot must have been many times, then went up to the door and knocked once, then again, and again, but got no response. I walked around to the store entrance and tried to open it, but it was bolted tight like the gate of Paradise. It’s frustrating to be blocked from your little enthusiasms; but as I looked around for someone to ask, I felt a bit consoled by the sight of Dr. Johnson himself, who just then happened to be sitting in his case almost in the middle of St. Mary's Square, facing his father's house.

Of course, it being almost fourscore years since the Doctor laid aside his weary bulk of flesh, together with the ponderous melancholy that had so long weighed him down, the intelligent reader will at once comprehend that he was marble in his substance, and seated in a marble chair, on an elevated stone pedestal. In short, it was a statue, sculptured by Lucas, and placed here in 1838, at the expense of Dr. Law, the reverend chancellor of the diocese.

Of course, since it has been nearly eighty years since the Doctor set aside his tired body, along with the heavy sadness that had weighed him down for so long, the insightful reader will quickly realize that he is made of marble and sitting in a marble chair on a raised stone pedestal. In short, it’s a statue, sculpted by Lucas and installed here in 1838, at the expense of Dr. Law, the reverend chancellor of the diocese.

The figure is colossal (though perhaps not much more so than the mountainous Doctor himself) and looks down upon the spectator from its pedestal of ten or twelve feet high, with a broad and heavy benignity of aspect, very like in feature to Sir Joshua Reynolds's portrait of Johnson, but calmer and sweeter in expression. Several big books are piled up beneath his chair, and, if I mistake not, he holds a volume in his hand, thus blinking forth at the world out of his learned abstraction, owllike, yet benevolent at heart. The statue is immensely massive, a vast ponderosity of stone, not finely spiritualized, nor, indeed, fully humanized, but rather resembling a great stone-bowlder than a man. You must look with the eyes of faith and sympathy, or, possibly, you might lose the human being altogether, and find only a big stone within your mental grasp. On the pedestal are three bas-reliefs. In the first, Johnson is represented as hardly more than a baby, bestriding an old man's shoulders, resting his chin on the bald head which he embraces with his little arms, and listening earnestly to the High-Church eloquence of Dr. Sacheverell. In the second tablet, he is seen riding to school on the shoulders of two of his comrades, while another boy supports him in the rear.

The statue is massive (though maybe not much bigger than the towering Doctor himself) and looks down on the viewer from its pedestal that’s about ten or twelve feet high, with a broad and heavy kindness in its expression, quite similar to Sir Joshua Reynolds's portrait of Johnson, but more serene and gentle. Several large books are stacked under his chair, and, if I'm not mistaken, he’s holding a book in his hand, peering out at the world from his learned focus, owl-like yet truly warm-hearted. The statue is incredibly hefty, a huge chunk of stone, not finely detailed or fully human-like, but more resembling a giant rock than a person. You need to look with eyes of faith and empathy, or else you might miss the human aspect entirely and just see a large stone in your mind. On the pedestal, there are three bas-reliefs. In the first one, Johnson is depicted as little more than a baby, sitting on an old man's shoulders, resting his chin on the bald head he wraps his tiny arms around, listening intently to the High-Church speeches of Dr. Sacheverell. In the second relief, he's shown riding to school on the shoulders of two of his friends, while another boy supports him from behind.

The third bas-relief possesses, to my mind, a great deal of pathos, to which my appreciative faculty is probably the more alive, because I have always been profoundly impressed by the incident here commemorated, and long ago tried to tell it for the behoof of childish readers. It shows Johnson in the market-place of Uttoxeter, doing penance for an act of disobedience to his father, committed fifty years before. He stands bareheaded, a venerable figure, and a countenance extremely sad and woebegone, with the wind and rain driving hard against him, and thus helping to suggest to the spectator the gloom of his inward state. Some market-people and children gaze awe-stricken into his face, and an aged man and woman, with clasped and uplifted hands, seem to be praying for him. These latter personages (whose introduction by the artist is none the less effective, because, in queer proximity, there are some commodities of market-day in the shape of living ducks and dead poultry) I interpreted to represent the spirits of Johnson's father and mother, lending what aid they could to lighten his half-century's burden of remorse.

The third bas-relief has a lot of emotional weight, which I really feel because I've always been deeply moved by the event it depicts. I even tried to tell this story long ago for kids. It shows Johnson in the marketplace of Uttoxeter, doing penance for disobeying his father fifty years earlier. He stands there without a hat, looking like an old man, with a very sad and troubled expression, while the wind and rain lash against him, emphasizing his inner sorrow. Some market-goers and children stare at him in disbelief, and an elderly man and woman with clasped and raised hands seem to be praying for him. I saw these last two figures, despite their odd placement next to items like live ducks and dead chickens, as representing Johnson's father and mother, trying to help him bear his decades of guilt.

I had never heard of the above-described piece of sculpture before; it appears to have no reputation as a work of art, nor am I at all positive that it deserves any. For me, however, it did as much as sculpture could, under the circumstances, even if the artist of the Libyan Sibyl had wrought it, by reviving my interest in the sturdy old Englishman, and particularly by freshening my perception of a wonderful beauty and pathetic tenderness in the incident of the penance. So, the next day, I left Lichfield for Uttoxeter, on one of the few purely sentimental pilgrimages that I ever undertook, to see the very spot where Johnson had stood. Boswell, I think, speaks of the town (its name is pronounced Yuteoxeter) as being about nine miles off from Lichfield, but the county-map would indicate a greater distance; and by rail, passing from one line to another, it is as much as eighteen miles. I have always had an idea of old Michael Johnson sending his literary merchandise by carrier's wagon, journeying to Uttoxeter afoot on market-day morning, selling books through the busy hours, and returning to Lichfield at night. This could not possibly have been the case.

I had never heard of the sculpture described above before; it doesn't seem to have any reputation as a work of art, and I’m not really sure it deserves one. However, for me, it did as much as sculpture could do, given the circumstances, even if the artist of the Libyan Sibyl created it, by rekindling my interest in the tough old Englishman and especially by refreshing my appreciation of the incredible beauty and touching sadness in the scene of the penance. So, the next day, I left Lichfield for Uttoxeter, on one of the few purely sentimental journeys I've ever taken, to see the exact spot where Johnson had stood. Boswell, I think, mentions the town (its name is pronounced Yuteoxeter) as being about nine miles away from Lichfield, but the county map suggests it might be farther; and by train, switching from one line to another, it could be as much as eighteen miles. I’ve always imagined old Michael Johnson sending his literary goods by carrier's wagon, trudging to Uttoxeter on foot on market-day mornings, selling books during the busy hours, and then returning to Lichfield at night. That couldn't possibly have been the case.

Arriving at the Uttoxeter station, the first objects that I saw, with a green field or two between them and me, were the tower and gray steeple of a church, rising among red-tiled roofs and a few scattered trees. A very short walk takes you from the station up into the town. It had been my previous impression that the market-place of Uttoxeter lay immediately roundabout the church; and, if I remember the narrative aright, Johnson, or Boswell in his behalf, describes his father's book-stall as standing in the market-place, close beside the sacred edifice. It is impossible for me to say what changes may have occurred in the topography of the town, during almost a century and a half since Michael Johnson retired from business, and ninety years, at least, since his son's penance was performed. But the church has now merely a street of ordinary width passing around it, while the market-place, though near at hand, neither forms a part of it nor is really contiguous, nor would its throng and bustle be apt to overflow their boundaries and surge against the churchyard and the old gray tower. Nevertheless, a walk of a minute or two brings a person from the centre of the market-place to the church-door; and Michael Johnson might very conveniently have located his stall and laid out his literary ware in the corner at the tower's base; better there, indeed, than in the busy centre of an agricultural market. But the picturesque arrangement and full impressiveness of the story absolutely require that Johnson shall not have done his penance in a corner, ever so little retired, but shall have been the very nucleus of the crowd,—the midmost man of the market-place,—a central image of Memory and Remorse, contrasting with and overpowering the petty materialism around him. He himself, having the force to throw vitality and truth into what persons differently constituted might reckon a mere external ceremony, and an absurd one, could not have failed to see this necessity. I am resolved, therefore, that the true site of Dr. Johnson's penance was in the middle of the market-place.

Arriving at the Uttoxeter station, the first things I saw, with a couple of green fields between us, were the tower and gray steeple of a church, rising among red-tiled roofs and a few scattered trees. A very short walk takes you from the station into the town. I had previously thought that the market square of Uttoxeter was right around the church; and if I remember the story correctly, Johnson, or Boswell for him, describes his father's book stall as being in the market square, right next to the church. It's hard for me to say what changes have taken place in the layout of the town since Michael Johnson retired from business almost a hundred and fifty years ago, and at least ninety years since his son's penance happened. But now, the church has only a street of average width going around it, while the market square, although close by, doesn’t really connect or blend in, and the hustle and bustle wouldn’t likely spill over and crowd the churchyard and the old gray tower. Still, a quick one or two-minute walk takes a person from the center of the market square to the church door; and Michael Johnson could have conveniently set up his stall and arranged his literary goods in the corner at the base of the tower – better there, in fact, than in the hectic center of an agricultural market. But the picturesque arrangement and full impact of the story absolutely require that Johnson didn’t do his penance in a corner, no matter how slightly off the main path, but in the very heart of the crowd – the central figure of the market square – a focal point of Memory and Remorse, contrasting with and overshadowing the small materialism around him. He himself, with the energy to infuse life and truth into what others might see as just an external ceremony and a ridiculous one, could not have failed to recognize this need. Therefore, I’m convinced that the true location of Dr. Johnson's penance was in the middle of the market square.

That important portion of the town is a rather spacious and irregularly shaped vacuity, surrounded by houses and shops, some of them old, with red-tiled roofs, others wearing a pretence of newness, but probably as old in their inner substance as the rest. The people of Uttoxeter seemed very idle in the warm summer-day, and were scattered in little groups along the sidewalks, leisurely chatting with one another, and often turning about to take a deliberate stare at my humble self; insomuch that I felt as if my genuine sympathy for the illustrious penitent, and my many reflections about him, must have imbued me with some of his own singularity of mien. If their great-grandfathers were such redoubtable starers in the Doctor's day, his penance was no light one. This curiosity indicates a paucity of visitors to the little town, except for market purposes, and I question if Uttoxeter ever saw an American before. The only other thing that greatly impressed me was the abundance of public-houses, one at every step or two Red Lions, White Harts, Bulls' Heads, Mitres, Cross Keys, and I know not what besides. These are probably for the accommodation of the farmers and peasantry of the neighborhood on market-day, and content themselves with a very meagre business on other days of the week. At any rate, I was the only guest in Uttoxeter at the period of my visit, and had but an infinitesimal portion of patronage to distribute among such a multitude of inns. The reader, however, will possibly be scandalized to learn what was the first, and, indeed, the only important affair that I attended to, after coming so far to indulge a solemn and high emotion, and standing now on the very spot where my pious errand should have been consummated. I stepped into one of the rustic hostelries and got my dinner,—bacon and greens, some mutton-chops, juicier and more delectable than all America could serve up at the President's table, and a gooseberry pudding; a sufficient meal for six yeomen, and good enough for a prince, besides a pitcher of foaming ale, the whole at the pitiful small charge of eighteen-pence!

That important part of town is a pretty spacious and oddly shaped open area, surrounded by houses and shops—some old with red-tiled roofs and others pretending to be new, but probably just as old on the inside as the rest. The people of Uttoxeter seemed quite lazy on that warm summer day, scattered in small groups along the sidewalks, casually chatting with each other and often stopping to take a good look at me. I felt like my genuine sympathy for the notable penitent, along with my many thoughts about him, must have given me some of his own unique presence. If their great-grandfathers stared so boldly back in the Doctor's time, his penance must have been quite arduous. This curiosity suggests there aren't many visitors to the little town, except for market days, and I wonder if Uttoxeter had ever seen an American before. The only other thing that really stood out to me was the abundance of pubs, one every few steps—Red Lions, White Harts, Bulls' Heads, Mitres, Cross Keys, and who knows what else. These are likely meant for accommodating local farmers and townsfolk on market day, and they probably see very little business on other days of the week. At any rate, I was the only guest in Uttoxeter during my visit, with hardly any patronage to share among such a plethora of inns. The reader might be shocked to learn what was the first and, indeed, the only significant thing I did after traveling so far to embrace a solemn and profound experience, especially standing in the very spot where my spiritual quest should have been fulfilled. I walked into one of the cozy inns and had my dinner—bacon and greens, some mutton chops, juicier and tastier than anything America could serve at the President's table, and a gooseberry pudding; a meal big enough for six farmers and good enough for a prince, plus a pitcher of frothy ale—all for the ridiculous price of eighteen pence!

Dr. Johnson would have forgiven me, for nobody had a heartier faith in beef and mutton than himself. And as regards my lack of sentiment in eating my dinner,—it was the wisest thing I had done that day. A sensible man had better not let himself be betrayed into these attempts to realize the things which he has dreamed about, and which, when they cease to be purely ideal in his mind, will have lost the truest of their truth, the loftiest and profoundest part of their power over his sympathies. Facts, as we really find them, whatever poetry they may involve, are covered with a stony excrescence of prose, resembling the crust on a beautiful sea-shell, and they never show their most delicate and divinest colors until we shall have dissolved away their grosser actualities by steeping them long in a powerful menstruum of thought. And seeking to actualize them again, we do but renew the crust. If this were otherwise,—if the moral sublimity of a great fact depended in any degree on its garb of external circumstances, things which change and decay,—it could not itself be immortal and ubiquitous, and only a brief point of time and a little neighborhood would be spiritually nourished by its grandeur and beauty.

Dr. Johnson would have understood me, as no one had a stronger belief in beef and mutton than he did. And regarding my lack of emotion while eating dinner — it was the smartest thing I’d done all day. A practical person shouldn’t let themselves be misled into trying to make real the dreams they have, because once those ideals become real in their minds, they lose their deepest truth, the most profound part of what makes them impactful. The facts we encounter, no matter how poetic they may seem, are covered with a hard layer of prose, like the rough shell of a beautiful sea creature, and they don’t reveal their finest and most beautiful colors until we’ve dissolved their rough realities by soaking them for a long time in deep thought. When we try to bring those realities back to life, we just create the rough exterior again. If that weren’t the case—if the moral greatness of a great fact relied in any way on its external circumstances, which are subject to change and decay—it couldn’t be immortal and all-encompassing, and only a short moment in time and a small area would be inspired by its magnificence and beauty.

Such were a few of the reflections which I mingled with my ale, as I remember to have seen an old quaffer of that excellent liquor stir up his cup with a sprig of some bitter and fragrant herb. Meanwhile I found myself still haunted by a desire to get a definite result out of my visit to Uttoxeter. The hospitable inn was called the Nag's Head, and standing beside the market-place, was as likely as any other to have entertained old Michael Johnson in the days when he used to come hither to sell books. He, perhaps, had dined on bacon and greens, and drunk his ale, and smoked his pipe, in the very room where I now sat, which was a low, ancient room, certainly much older than Queen Anne's time, with a red-brick floor, and a white-washed ceiling, traversed by bare, rough beams, the whole in the rudest fashion, but extremely neat. Neither did it lack ornament, the walls being hung with colored engravings of prize oxen and other pretty prints, and the mantel-piece adorned with earthen-ware figures of shepherdesses in the Arcadian taste of long ago. Michael Johnson's eyes might have rested on that selfsame earthen image, to examine which more closely I had just crossed the brick pavement of the room. And, sitting down again, still as I sipped my ale, I glanced through the open window into the sunny market-place, and wished that I could honestly fix on one spot rather than another, as likely to have been the holy site where Johnson stood to do his penance.

These were some of the thoughts I mixed with my beer as I remembered seeing an old drinker of that fine beverage stir his cup with a sprig of some bitter and fragrant herb. At the same time, I found myself still driven by a desire to gain a clear outcome from my visit to Uttoxeter. The welcoming inn was called the Nag's Head, and standing next to the market square, it seemed just as likely as any other place to have hosted old Michael Johnson in the days when he used to come here to sell books. He might have dined on bacon and greens, enjoyed his beer, and smoked his pipe in the very room where I now sat, which was a low, old room, certainly much older than Queen Anne's time, with a red-brick floor and a whitewashed ceiling crossed by bare, rough beams, all done in the simplest style but extremely tidy. It also had decor, with the walls adorned with colored engravings of prize oxen and other nice prints, and the mantelpiece decorated with earthenware figures of shepherdesses in the classic Arcadian style of long ago. Michael Johnson's eyes might have rested on that same earthen figure, which I had just crossed the brick floor of the room to examine more closely. As I sat down again, still sipping my beer, I glanced out the open window into the sunny market square and wished I could honestly settle on one spot over another as the probable holy site where Johnson stood to do his penance.

How strange and stupid it is that tradition should not have marked and kept in mind the very place! How shameful (nothing less than that) that there should be no local memorial of this incident, as beautiful and touching a passage as can be cited out of any human life! No inscription of it, almost as sacred as a verse of Scripture on the wall of the church! No statue of the venerable and illustrious penitent in the market-place to throw a wholesome awe over its earthliness, its frauds and petty wrongs of which the benumbed fingers of conscience can make no record, its selfish competition of each man with his brother or his neighbor, its traffic of soul-substance for a little worldly gain! Such a statue, if the piety of the people did not raise it, might almost have been expected to grow up out of the pavement of its own accord on the spot that had been watered by the rain that dripped from Johnson's garments, mingled with his remorseful tears.

How strange and foolish it is that tradition hasn’t marked or remembered this very place! How shameful (nothing less) that there’s no local memorial for this incident, such a beautiful and heartfelt moment from any human life! No inscription of it, almost as sacred as a verse from Scripture on the church wall! No statue of the honorable and respected penitent in the marketplace to inspire a healthy respect for its earthliness, its deceit and minor injustices that the numbed conscience can’t record, its selfish competition with each person against his brother or neighbor, its trading of soul for a bit of worldly gain! Such a statue, if the people's devotion didn’t create it, might almost be expected to rise from the pavement itself in the spot drenched by the rain that dripped from Johnson’s clothes, mixed with his remorseful tears.

Long after my visit to Uttoxeter, I was told that there were individuals in the town who could have shown me the exact, indubitable spot where Johnson performed his penance. I was assured, moreover, that sufficient interest was felt in the subject to have induced certain local discussions as to the expediency of erecting a memorial. With all deference to my polite informant, I surmise that there is a mistake, and decline, without further and precise evidence, giving credit to either of the above statements. The inhabitants know nothing, as a matter of general interest, about the penance, and care nothing for the scene of it. If the clergyman of the parish, for example, had ever heard of it, would he not have used the theme, time and again, wherewith to work tenderly and profoundly on the souls committed to his charge? If parents were familiar with it, would they not teach it to their young ones at the fireside, both to insure reverence to their own gray hairs, and to protect the children from such unavailing regrets as Johnson bore upon his heart for fifty years? If the site were ascertained, would not the pavement thereabouts be worn with reverential footsteps? Would not every town-born child be able to direct the pilgrim thither? While waiting at the station, before my departure, I asked a boy who stood near me,—an intelligent and gentlemanly lad, twelve or thirteen years old, whom I should take to be a clergyman's son,—I asked him if he had ever heard the story of Dr. Johnson, how he stood an hour doing penance near that church, the spire of which rose before us. The boy stared and answered,—

Long after my visit to Uttoxeter, I was told that there were people in the town who could have shown me the exact spot where Johnson did his penance. I was even assured that there was enough interest in the topic to spark local discussions about putting up a memorial. However, with all due respect to my polite informant, I suspect there’s a mistake and I’m hesitant to believe either of those claims without solid evidence. The locals generally don’t know or care about the penance or its location. For example, if the parish clergyman had heard of it, wouldn’t he have used the story repeatedly to inspire and reach the souls in his care? If parents were aware of it, wouldn’t they teach their kids about it at home to ensure respect for their own elders and spare the children from the regrets that Johnson carried for fifty years? If the site were known, wouldn’t the ground around it be worn from respectful visitors? Wouldn’t every child from the town be able to point the way for a visitor? While I was waiting at the station before I left, I asked a boy who was standing nearby—a bright and well-mannered kid, about twelve or thirteen years old, who I guessed was the son of a clergyman—if he had ever heard the story of Dr. Johnson and how he stood for an hour doing penance near that church whose spire was right in front of us. The boy stared and replied,—

"No!'

"No!"

"Were you born in Uttoxeter?"

"Were you born in Uttoxeter?"

"Yes."

"Yeah."

I inquired if no circumstance such as I had mentioned was known or talked about among the inhabitants.

I asked if there was any situation like the one I mentioned that people knew about or talked about among the residents.

"No," said the boy; "not that I ever heard of."

"No," said the boy; "not that I've ever heard of."

Just think of the absurd little town, knowing nothing of the only memorable incident which ever happened within its boundaries since the old Britons built it, this sad and lovely story, which consecrates the spot (for I found it holy to my contemplation, again, as soon as it lay behind me) in the heart of a stranger from three thousand miles over the sea! It but confirms what I have been saying, that sublime and beautiful facts are best understood when etherealized by distance.

Just imagine the ridiculous little town, completely unaware of the only memorable event that ever took place within its limits since it was built by the old Britons. This sad yet beautiful story makes the place special (I found it sacred for my thoughts, once it was behind me) in the heart of a stranger from three thousand miles across the ocean! It just proves what I’ve been saying: sublime and beautiful truths are best appreciated when they’re made more ethereal by distance.





PILGRIMAGE TO OLD BOSTON.

We set out at a little past eleven, and made our first stage to Manchester. We were by this time sufficiently Anglicized to reckon the morning a bright and sunny one; although the May sunshine was mingled with water, as it were, and distempered with a very bitter east-wind.

We left a little after eleven and headed to Manchester. By this point, we were enough like the locals to consider the morning bright and sunny, even though the May sunshine was mixed with rain and affected by a harsh east wind.

Lancashire is a dreary county (all, at least, except its hilly portions), and I have never passed through it without wishing myself anywhere but in that particular spot where I then happened to be. A few places along our route were historically interesting; as, for example, Bolton, which was the scene of many remarkable events in the Parliamentary War, and in the market-square of which one of the Earls of Derby was beheaded. We saw, along the wayside, the never-failing green fields, hedges, and other monotonous features of an ordinary English landscape. There were little factory villages, too, or larger towns, with their tall chimneys, and their pennons of black smoke, their ugliness of brick-work, and their heaps of refuse matter from the furnace, which seems to be the only kind of stuff which Nature cannot take back to herself and resolve into the elements, when man has thrown it aside. These hillocks of waste and effete mineral always disfigure the neighborhood of iron-mongering towns, and, even after a considerable antiquity, are hardly made decent with a little grass.

Lancashire is a gloomy county (except for its hilly areas), and I’ve never traveled through it without wishing I was anywhere else. A few places along our route had historical significance; for example, Bolton, which was the site of many important events during the Parliamentary War, and in the market square of which one of the Earls of Derby was executed. Along the way, we saw the usual green fields, hedges, and other dull features of a typical English landscape. There were also small factory villages and larger towns with their tall chimneys, billowing black smoke, ugly brickwork, and piles of waste from the furnaces, which seem to be the only kind of material that nature can’t reclaim and break down when man discards it. These mounds of waste and useless minerals always spoil the areas around iron-producing towns, and even after many years, they are barely improved by a bit of grass.

At a quarter to two we left Manchester by the Sheffield and Lincoln Railway. The scenery grew rather better than that through which we had hitherto passed, though still by no means very striking; for (except in the show-districts, such as the Lake country, or Derbyshire) English scenery is not particularly well worth looking at, considered as a spectacle or a picture. It has a real, homely charm of its own, no doubt; and the rich verdure, and the thorough finish added by human art, are perhaps as attractive to an American eye as any stronger feature could be. Our journey, however, between Manchester and Sheffield was not through a rich tract of country, but along a valley walled in by bleak, ridgy hills extending straight as a rampart, and across black moorlands with here and there a plantation of trees. Sometimes there were long and gradual ascents, bleak, windy, and desolate, conveying the very impression which the reader gets from many passages of Miss Bronte's novels, and still more from those of her two sisters. Old stone or brick farm-houses, and, once in a while, an old church-tower, were visible; but these are almost too common objects to be noticed in an English landscape.

At 1:45, we left Manchester on the Sheffield and Lincoln Railway. The scenery improved a bit compared to what we’d seen so far, though it still wasn’t very impressive; except in popular areas like the Lake District or Derbyshire, English scenery isn’t particularly stunning as a sight or a painting. It definitely has its own real, down-to-earth charm, and the rich greenery, along with the finishing touches from human work, might be just as appealing to an American eye as any more dramatic feature could be. However, our trip between Manchester and Sheffield took us through a valley flanked by dull, rugged hills that went on like a wall, and across dark moorlands dotted with a few tree plantations. There were sometimes long, gradual climbs that felt bleak, windy, and deserted, giving the same impression that readers get from many parts of Miss Brontë’s novels, and even more so from those of her sisters. Old stone or brick farmhouses, and occasionally an old church tower, were visible; but these are almost too common to stand out in an English landscape.

On a railway, I suspect, what little we do see of the country is seen quite amiss, because it was never intended to be looked at from any point of view in that straight line; so that it is like looking at the wrong side of a piece of tapestry. The old highways and foot-paths were as natural as brooks and rivulets, and adapted themselves by an inevitable impulse to the physiognomy of the country; and, furthermore, every object within view of them had some subtile reference to their curves and undulations; but the line of a railway is perfectly artificial, and puts all precedent things at sixes-and-sevens. At any rate, be the cause what it may, there is seldom anything worth seeing within the scope of a railway traveller's eye; and if there were, it requires an alert marksman to take a flying shot at the picturesque.

On a railway, I think what little we do see of the countryside is seen completely wrong, because it was never meant to be viewed from that straight line; it’s like looking at the back of a tapestry. The old roads and paths were as natural as streams and creeks, shaping themselves naturally to the landscape; moreover, every object visible from them has some subtle connection to their curves and bends. But the path of a railway is completely artificial and throws everything off. Anyway, regardless of the reason, there’s rarely anything worthwhile to see within a railway traveler’s view; and even if there were, it takes a keen eye to catch a glimpse of something picturesque.

At one of the stations (it was near a village of ancient aspect, nestling round a church, on a wide Yorkshire moor) I saw a tall old lady in black, who seemed to have just alighted from the train. She caught my attention by a singular movement of the head, not once only, but continually repeated, and at regular intervals, as if she were making a stern and solemn protest against some action that developed itself before her eyes, and were foreboding terrible disaster, if it should be persisted in. Of course, it was nothing more than a paralytic or nervous affection; yet one might fancy that it had its origin in some unspeakable wrong, perpetrated half a lifetime ago in this old gentlewoman's presence, either against herself or somebody whom she loved still better. Her features had a wonderful sternness, which, I presume, was caused by her habitual effort to compose and keep them quiet, and thereby counteract the tendency to paralytic movement. The slow, regular, and inexorable character of the motion—her look of force and self-control, which had the appearance of rendering it voluntary, while yet it was so fateful— have stamped this poor lady's face and gesture into my memory; so that, some dark day or other, I am afraid she will reproduce herself in a dismal romance.

At one of the stations (it was near a quaint village, nestled around a church on a vast Yorkshire moor), I noticed a tall old lady in black, who seemed to have just gotten off the train. She caught my eye with a peculiar movement of her head, not just once but repeatedly, at regular intervals, as if she was making a serious and solemn protest against some action happening right in front of her, foreseeing terrible consequences if it continued. Of course, it was probably just a result of a neurological issue, but one might imagine it stemming from some unspeakable injustice that occurred half a lifetime ago in this woman’s presence, either against her or someone she cared for deeply. Her face had a remarkable sternness, likely due to her constant effort to keep it composed and still, counteracting the tendency to involuntary movements. The slow, steady, and relentless nature of the motion—her expression of strength and self-control, which made it seem deliberate while still being so ominous—have etched this poor lady's face and gestures into my memory, and I fear that some dark day, she will inspire a grim story.

The train stopped a minute or two, to allow the tickets to be taken, just before entering the Sheffield station, and thence I had a glimpse of the famous town of razors and penknives, enveloped in a cloud of its own diffusing. My impressions of it are extremely vague and misty,—or, rather, smoky: for Sheffield seems to me smokier than Manchester. Liverpool, or Birmingham,—smokier than all England besides, unless Newcastle be the exception. It might have been Pluto's own metropolis, shrouded in sulphurous vapor; and, indeed, our approach to it had been by the Valley of the Shadow of Death, through a tunnel three miles in length, quite traversing the breadth and depth of a mountainous hill.

The train stopped for a minute or two to allow the tickets to be collected just before entering Sheffield station, and from there I caught a glimpse of the famous town known for its razors and penknives, wrapped in a haze of its own making. My impressions of it are pretty vague and hazy—or, more accurately, smoky: Sheffield seems smokier to me than Manchester, Liverpool, or Birmingham—smokier than anywhere else in England, unless Newcastle is an exception. It could have been Pluto's own city, covered in sulfurous fog; and indeed, our approach had been through the Valley of the Shadow of Death, through a three-mile-long tunnel that cut right through a mountainous hill.

After passing Sheffield, the scenery became softer, gentler, yet more picturesque. At one point we saw what I believe to be the utmost northern verge of Sherwood Forest,—not consisting, however, of thousand-year oaks, extant from Robin Hood's days, but of young and thriving plantations, which will require a century or two of slow English growth to give them much breadth of shade. Earl Fitzwilliam's property lies in this neighborhood, and probably his castle was hidden among some soft depth of foliage not far off. Farther onward the country grew quite level around us, whereby I judged that we must now be in Lincolnshire; and shortly after six o'clock we caught the first glimpse of the Cathedral towers, though they loomed scarcely huge enough for our preconceived idea of them. But, as we drew nearer, the great edifice began to assert itself, making us acknowledge it to be larger than our receptivity could take in.

After passing Sheffield, the scenery became softer, gentler, and more picturesque. At one point, we saw what I believe is the far northern edge of Sherwood Forest—not made up of ancient oaks from Robin Hood's time, but of young, thriving plantations that will take a century or two to grow enough to provide significant shade. Earl Fitzwilliam's property is in this area, and his castle was probably hidden among some lush foliage nearby. As we went further, the land became quite flat, leading me to think we must now be in Lincolnshire. Shortly after six o'clock, we caught our first glimpse of the Cathedral towers, although they didn't appear as large as we had imagined. But as we got closer, the great building began to assert itself, making us realize it was bigger than we could fully appreciate.

At the railway-station we found no cab (it being an unknown vehicle in Lincoln), but only an omnibus belonging to the Saracen's Head, which the driver recommended as the best hotel in the city, and took us thither accordingly. It received us hospitably, and looked comfortable enough; though, like the hotels of most old English towns, it had a musty fragrance of antiquity, such as I have smelt in a seldom-opened London church where the broad-aisle is paved with tombstones. The house was of an ancient fashion, the entrance into its interior court-yard being through an arch, in the side of which is the door of the hotel. There are long corridors, an intricate arrangement of passages, and an up-and-down meandering of staircases, amid which it would be no marvel to encounter some forgotten guest who had gone astray a hundred years ago, and was still seeking for his bedroom while the rest of his generation were in their graves. There is no exaggerating the confusion of mind that seizes upon a stranger in the bewildering geography of a great old-fashioned English inn.

At the train station, we couldn’t find a cab (it was a rare sight in Lincoln), but only a shuttle bus belonging to the Saracen’s Head. The driver recommended it as the best hotel in the city and took us there. It welcomed us warmly and looked comfortable enough, though, like many old English town hotels, it had a musty smell of history, similar to what I’ve smelled in a rarely opened London church with a broad aisle paved with tombstones. The building had an old-fashioned design, with an entrance to its interior courtyard through an arch, where the hotel door is located. There are long hallways, a complex network of passages, and a winding set of staircases, where it wouldn’t be surprising to run into a long-lost guest who got lost a hundred years ago and is still looking for their room while the rest of their generation has been laid to rest. There's no overstating the confusion that hits a newcomer in the puzzling layout of a large, old-fashioned English inn.

This hotel stands in the principal street of Lincoln, and within a very short distance of one of the ancient city-gates, which is arched across the public way, with a smaller arch for foot-passengers on either side; the whole, a gray, time-gnawn, ponderous, shadowy structure, through the dark vista of which you look into the Middle Ages. The street is narrow, and retains many antique peculiarities; though, unquestionably, English domestic architecture has lost its most impressive features, in the course of the last century. In this respect, there are finer old towns than Lincoln: Chester, for instance, and Shrewsbury,—which last is unusually rich in those quaint and stately edifices where the gentry of the shire used to make their winter abodes, in a provincial metropolis. Almost everywhere, nowadays, there is a monotony of modern brick or stuccoed fronts, hiding houses that are older than ever, but obliterating the picturesque antiquity of the street.

This hotel is located on the main street of Lincoln, just a short walk from one of the old city gates, which arches over the public road, with smaller arches for pedestrians on either side. The entire structure is gray, weathered, heavy, and shadowy, giving you a glimpse into the Middle Ages as you look through its dark passage. The street is narrow and still has many old features, although it's clear that English domestic architecture has lost much of its most impressive characteristics over the past century. In this regard, there are more beautiful old towns than Lincoln, like Chester and Shrewsbury—especially Shrewsbury, which is rich in those charming and grand buildings where the local gentry used to stay during the winter in a provincial city. Nowadays, the streets are mostly filled with a uniformity of modern brick or stucco facades, covering up homes that are older than ever while wiping away the picturesque charm of the past.

Between seven and eight o'clock (it being still broad daylight in these long English days) we set out to pay a preliminary visit to the exterior of the Cathedral. Passing through the Stone Bow, as the city-gate close by is called, we ascended a street which grew steeper and narrower as we advanced, till at last it got to be the steepest street I ever climbed,— so steep that any carriage, if left to itself, would rattle downward much faster than it could possibly be drawn up. Being almost the only hill in Lincolnshire, the inhabitants seem disposed to make the most of it. The houses on each side had no very remarkable aspect, except one with a stone portal and carved ornaments, which is now a dwelling-place for poverty-stricken people, but may have been an aristocratic abode in the days of the Norman kings, to whom its style of architecture dates back. This is called the Jewess's House, having been inhabited by a woman of that faith who was hanged six hundred years ago.

Between seven and eight o'clock (it was still broad daylight during these long English days), we set out to do a quick visit to the exterior of the Cathedral. Passing through the Stone Bow, which is the city gate nearby, we climbed a street that grew steeper and narrower as we went on, until it became the steepest street I had ever climbed—so steep that any carriage, if left alone, would roll down much faster than it could be pulled up. Since it’s almost the only hill in Lincolnshire, the locals seem to want to make the most of it. The houses on either side weren't particularly noteworthy, except for one with a stone entrance and carved decorations, which is now home to people in need but might have been an upscale residence in the days of the Norman kings, as indicated by its architectural style. This place is called the Jewess's House because it was once lived in by a woman of that faith who was hanged six hundred years ago.

And still the street grew steeper and steeper. Certainly, the Bishop and clergy of Lincoln ought not to be fat men, but of very spiritual, saint-like, almost angelic habit, if it be a frequent part of their ecclesiastical duty to climb this hill; for it is a real penance, and was probably performed as such, and groaned over accordingly, in monkish times. Formerly, on the day of his installation, the Bishop used to ascend the hill barefoot, and was doubtless cheered and invigorated by looking upward to the grandeur that was to console him for the humility of his approach. We, likewise, were beckoned onward by glimpses of the Cathedral towers, and, finally, attaining an open square on the summit, we saw an old Gothic gateway to the left hand, and another to the right. The latter had apparently been a part of the exterior defences of the Cathedral, at a time when the edifice was fortified. The west front rose behind. We passed through one of the side-arches of the Gothic portal, and found ourselves in the Cathedral Close, a wide, level space, where the great old Minster has fair room to sit, looking down on the ancient structures that surround it, all of which, in former days, were the habitations of its dignitaries and officers. Some of them are still occupied as such, though others are in too neglected and dilapidated a state to seem worthy of so splendid an establishment. Unless it be Salisbury Close, however (which is incomparably rich as regards the old residences that belong to it), I remember no more comfortably picturesque precincts round any other cathedral. But, in truth, almost every cathedral close, in turn, has seemed to me the loveliest, cosiest, safest, least wind-shaken, most decorous, and most enjoyable shelter that ever the thrift and selfishness of mortal man contrived for himself. How delightful, to combine all this with the service of the temple!

And still the street kept getting steeper and steeper. Definitely, the Bishop and clergy of Lincoln shouldn’t be overweight; instead, they should be very spiritual, saintly, and almost angelic, especially if climbing this hill is part of their regular church duties. It’s a real penance and was probably seen as such, groaned over in monkish times. In the past, on the day of his installation, the Bishop would walk up the hill barefoot, surely feeling uplifted and energized by the majestic view that was meant to comfort him for the humility of his approach. We, too, were urged onward by glimpses of the Cathedral towers, and finally, reaching an open square at the top, we saw an old Gothic gate to our left and another to our right. The one on the right seemed to have been part of the Cathedral’s outer defenses back when the structure was fortified. The west front rose behind us. We walked through one of the side arches of the Gothic portal and found ourselves in the Cathedral Close, a spacious, flat area where the grand old Minster has plenty of room to stand, looking down on the ancient buildings that surround it, which were once homes to its dignitaries and officials. Some of those buildings are still in use, while others are too neglected and rundown to seem fit for such a magnificent establishment. Unless it’s Salisbury Close—which is incredibly rich in its old residences—I don’t remember any other cathedral precincts being as comfortably picturesque. In reality, nearly every cathedral close has appeared to me as the loveliest, coziest, safest, least windy, most respectful, and most enjoyable shelter that human thrift and selfishness have ever created. How wonderful it is to combine all of this with the service of the temple!

Lincoln Cathedral is built of a yellowish brown-stone, which appears either to have been largely restored, or else does not assume the hoary, crumbly surface that gives such a venerable aspect to most of the ancient churches and castles in England. In many parts, the recent restorations are quite evident; but other, and much the larger portions, can scarcely have been touched for centuries: for there are still the gargoyles, perfect, or with broken noses, as the case may be, but showing that variety and fertility of grotesque extravagance which no modern imitation can effect. There are innumerable niches, too, up the whole height of the towers, above and around the entrance, and all over the walls: most of them empty, but a few containing the lamentable remnants of headless saints and angels. It is singular what a native animosity lives in the human heart against carved images, insomuch that, whether they represent Christian saint or Pagan deity, all unsophisticated men seize the first safe opportunity to knock off their heads! In spite of all dilapidations, however, the effect of the west front of the Cathedral is still exceedingly rich, being covered from massive base to airy summit with the minutest details of sculpture and carving: at least, it was so once; and even now the spiritual impression of its beauty remains so strong, that we have to look twice to see that much of it has been obliterated. I have seen a cherry-stone carved all over by a monk, so minutely that it must have cost him half a lifetime of labor; and this cathedral-front seems to have been elaborated in a monkish spirit, like that cherry-stone. Not that the result is in the least petty, but miraculously grand, and all the more so for the faithful beauty of the smallest details.

Lincoln Cathedral is made from a yellowish-brown stone that either has been extensively restored or lacks the ancient, crumbling texture that gives many old churches and castles in England their age-old look. In several areas, the recent restorations are quite obvious, but in other much larger sections, it seems like they haven’t been touched for centuries. You can still see the gargoyles, some intact and others with broken noses, showcasing a variety and creativity of grotesque designs that modern replicas can’t achieve. There are countless niches spanning the full height of the towers, above and around the entrance, and all along the walls—most of them empty, but a few holding the sad remnants of headless saints and angels. It’s strange how much hostility people have towards carved images; whether they depict a Christian saint or a Pagan god, ordinary people often take the first chance they get to knock off their heads! Despite all the damage, the impact of the cathedral’s west front is still incredibly rich, adorned from its sturdy base to its airy peak with intricate details of sculpture and carving. At least, that was true once; even now, the spiritual impression of its beauty is so strong that we have to look closely to notice how much has been worn away. I've seen a cherry pit carved so thoroughly by a monk that it must have taken him half a lifetime to complete; this cathedral front seems to have been crafted with that same monk-like dedication. But rather than being small or insignificant, the outcome is astonishingly grand, made even more impressive by the faithful beauty of its tiniest details.

An elderly maid, seeing us looking up at the west front, came to the door of an adjacent house, and called to inquire if we wished to go into the Cathedral; but as there would have been a dusky twilight beneath its roof, like the antiquity that has sheltered itself within, we declined for the present. So we merely walked round the exterior, and thought it more beautiful than that of York; though, on recollection, I hardly deem it so majestic and mighty as that. It is vain to attempt a description, or seek even to record the feeling which the edifice inspires. It does not impress the beholder as an inanimate object, but as something that has a vast, quiet, long-enduring life of its own,—a creation which man did not build, though in some way or other it is connected with him, and kindred to human nature. In short, I fall straightway to talking nonsense, when I try to express my inner sense of this and other cathedrals.

An old maid, seeing us looking up at the west front, came to the door of a nearby house and asked if we wanted to go into the Cathedral. But since it would have felt dim and shadowy under its roof, just like the ancient history that's sheltered there, we decided to pass for now. So we just walked around the outside and thought it was more beautiful than York's, though on second thought, I don’t really think it’s as grand and impressive as that one. It's pointless to try to describe or even capture the feeling that the building gives. It doesn’t just hit you as a lifeless structure, but as something that has a vast, quiet, enduring life of its own—a creation that man didn’t build, though it's somehow connected to us and reflective of human nature. In short, I immediately start rambling when I try to express what I feel about this cathedral and others like it.

While we stood in the close, at the eastern end of the Minster, the clock chimed the quarters; and then Great Tom, who hangs in the Rood Tower, told us it was eight o'clock, in far the sweetest and mightiest accents that I ever heard from any bell,—slow, and solemn, and allowing the profound reverberations of each stroke to die away before the next one fell. It was still broad daylight in that upper region of the town, and would be so for some time longer; but the evening atmosphere was getting sharp and cool. We therefore descended the steep street,—our younger companion running before us, and gathering such headway that I fully expected him to break his head against some projecting wall.

While we were standing in the close at the eastern end of the Minster, the clock chimed the quarters; and then Great Tom, which hangs in the Rood Tower, let us know it was eight o'clock, in the sweetest and loudest tone I’ve ever heard from any bell—slow and solemn, letting the deep reverberations of each strike fade away before the next one came. It was still bright daylight in that upper part of the town, and it would be for a while longer; but the evening air was starting to feel sharp and cool. So, we went down the steep street—our younger companion running ahead of us, picking up speed so much that I fully expected him to crash into a wall.

In the morning we took a fly (an English term for an exceedingly sluggish vehicle), and drove up to the Minster by a road rather less steep and abrupt than the one we had previously climbed. We alighted before the west front, and sent our charioteer in quest of the verger; but, as he was not immediately to be found, a young girl let us into the nave. We found it very grand, it is needless to say, but not so grand, methought, as the vast nave of York Cathedral, especially beneath the great central tower of the latter. Unless a writer intends a professedly architectural description, there is but one set of phrases in which to talk of all the cathedrals in England and elsewhere. They are alike in their great features: an acre or two of stone flags for a pavement; rows of vast columns supporting a vaulted roof at a dusky height; great windows, sometimes richly bedimmed with ancient or modern stained glass; and an elaborately carved screen between the nave and chancel, breaking the vista that might else be of such glorious length, and which is further choked up by a massive organ.—in spite of which obstructions, you catch the broad, variegated glimmer of the painted east window, where a hundred saints wear their robes of transfiguration. Behind the screen are the carved oaken stalls of the Chapter and Prebendaries, the Bishop's throne, the pulpit, the altar, and whatever else may furnish out the Holy of Holies. Nor must we forget the range of chapels (once dedicated to Catholic saints, but which have now lost their individual consecration), nor the old monuments of kings, warriors, and prelates, in the side-aisles of the chancel. In close contiguity to the main body of the Cathedral is the Chapter-House, which, here at Lincoln, as at Salisbury, is supported by one central pillar rising from the floor, and putting forth branches like a tree, to hold up the roof. Adjacent to the Chapter-House are the cloisters, extending round a quadrangle, and paved with lettered tombstones, the more antique of which have had their inscriptions half obliterated by the feet of monks taking their noontide exercise in these sheltered walks, five hundred years ago. Some of these old burial-stones, although with ancient crosses engraved upon them, have been made to serve as memorials to dead people of very recent date.

In the morning, we took a slow vehicle (an English term for a very sluggish ride) and drove up to the Minster by a road that was less steep and abrupt than the one we had climbed before. We got out in front of the west front and sent our driver to find the verger; however, since he wasn't immediately available, a young girl let us into the nave. It goes without saying that it was very grand, but I thought it wasn't quite as grand as the vast nave of York Cathedral, especially under the great central tower there. Unless a writer is specifically aiming for an architectural description, there’s really only one way to talk about cathedrals in England and beyond. They share the same major features: a couple of acres of stone flags for flooring; rows of massive columns supporting a vaulted roof at a dim height; large windows, sometimes beautifully obscured with ancient or modern stained glass; and an intricately carved screen between the nave and chancel, interrupting the otherwise glorious view, which is further blocked by a huge organ. Despite these obstructions, you can catch the bright, mixed glimmer of the painted east window, where a hundred saints wear their robes of transfiguration. Behind the screen are the carved oak stalls for the Chapter and Prebendaries, the Bishop's throne, the pulpit, the altar, and everything else that makes up the Holy of Holies. We also shouldn't forget the range of chapels (once dedicated to Catholic saints but now lacking individual consecration) and the old monuments of kings, warriors, and clergy in the side aisles of the chancel. Close to the main body of the Cathedral is the Chapter-House, which, here at Lincoln, as in Salisbury, is supported by a single central pillar rising from the floor and branching out like a tree to hold up the roof. Next to the Chapter-House are the cloisters, which extend around a quadrangle, paved with engraved tombstones. The older ones have had their inscriptions mostly worn away by the feet of monks walking during their midday exercise five hundred years ago. Some of these old burial stones, even with ancient crosses engraved on them, have been used as memorials for people who have recently passed away.

In the chancel, among the tombs of forgotten bishops and knights, we saw an immense slab of stone purporting to be the monument of Catherine Swynford, wife of John of Gaunt; also, here was the shrine of the little Saint Hugh, that Christian child who was fabled to have been crucified by the Jews of Lincoln. The Cathedral is not particularly rich in monuments; for it suffered grievous outrage and dilapidation, both at the Reformation and in Cromwell's time. This latter iconoclast is in especially bad odor with the sextons and vergers of most of the old churches which I have visited. His soldiers stabled their steeds in the nave of Lincoln Cathedral, and hacked and hewed the monkish sculptures, and the ancestral memorials of great families, quite at their wicked and plebeian pleasure. Nevertheless, there are some most exquisite and marvellous specimens of flowers, foliage, and grapevines, and miracles of stone-work twined about arches, as if the material had been as soft as wax in the cunning sculptor's hands,—the leaves being represented with all their veins, so that you would almost think it petrified Nature, for which he sought to steal the praise of Art. Here, too, were those grotesque faces which always grin at you from the projections of monkish architecture, as if the builders had gone mad with their own deep solemnity, or dreaded such a catastrophe, unless permitted to throw in something ineffably absurd.

In the chancel, among the tombs of forgotten bishops and knights, we saw a huge stone slab claiming to be the tomb of Catherine Swynford, wife of John of Gaunt. Also here was the shrine of the little Saint Hugh, the Christian boy who was said to have been crucified by the Jews of Lincoln. The Cathedral isn't particularly rich in monuments; it suffered serious damage and neglect during the Reformation and in Cromwell’s time. This latter destroyer is especially disliked by the sextons and vergers of most of the old churches I've visited. His soldiers kept their horses in the nave of Lincoln Cathedral and chopped up the monkish sculptures and the ancestral memorials of great families, doing so with wicked and common disregard. Nevertheless, there are some truly exquisite and amazing examples of flowers, leaves, and grapevines, with stunning stonework entwining the arches, as if the material had been as soft as wax in the skilled sculptor's hands—the leaves depicted with all their veins, so that you would almost think it was petrified Nature that sought to steal the praise of Art. Here, too, were the grotesque faces that always grin at you from the projections of monkish architecture, as if the builders had gone mad from their own deep solemnity or feared such a fate unless allowed to include something utterly ridiculous.

Originally, it is supposed, all the pillars of this great edifice, and all these magic sculptures, were polished to the utmost degree of lustre; nor is it unreasonable to think that the artists would have taken these further pains, when they had already bestowed so much labor in working out their conceptions to the extremest point. But, at present, the whole interior of the Cathedral is smeared over with a yellowish wash, the very meanest hue imaginable, and for which somebody's soul has a bitter reckoning to undergo.

Originally, it's thought that all the pillars of this grand structure and all these enchanting sculptures were polished to a high shine; it's not unreasonable to believe that the artists would have put in even more effort since they had already invested so much work into perfecting their designs. However, right now, the entire interior of the Cathedral is covered in a yellowish wash, the dullest color imaginable, and someone will have to face the consequences for that.

In the centre of the grassy quadrangle about which the cloisters perambulate is a small, mean brick building, with a locked door. Our guide,—I forgot to say that we had been captured by a verger, in black, and with a white tie, but of a lusty and jolly aspect,—our guide unlocked this door, and disclosed a flight of steps. At the bottom appeared what I should have taken to be a large square of dim, worn, and faded oil-carpeting, which might originally have been painted of a rather gaudy pattern. This was a Roman tessellated pavement, made of small colored bricks, or pieces of burnt clay. It was accidentally discovered here, and has not been meddled with, further than by removing the superincumbent earth and rubbish.

In the middle of the grassy courtyard surrounded by the cloisters is a small, simple brick building with a locked door. Our guide— I forgot to mention that we had been approached by a verger, dressed in black with a white tie, but who had a hearty and friendly demeanor—unlocked this door and revealed a set of steps. At the bottom was what I would have thought was a large square of dim, worn, and faded oil carpet, which might have originally had a pretty flashy pattern. This was a Roman mosaic floor made of small colored bricks or pieces of burnt clay. It was discovered here by chance and hasn't been disturbed, other than removing the dirt and rubble on top of it.

Nothing else occurs to me, just now, to be recorded about the interior of the Cathedral, except that we saw a place where the stone pavement had been worn away by the feet of ancient pilgrims scraping upon it, as they knelt down before a shrine of the Virgin. Leaving the Minster, we now went along a street of more venerable appearance than we had heretofore seen, bordered with houses, the high peaked roofs of which were covered with red earthen tiles. It led us to a Roman arch, which was once the gateway of a fortification, and has been striding across the English street ever since the latter was a faint village-path, and for centuries before. The arch is about four hundred yards from the Cathedral; and it is to be noticed that there are Roman remains in all this neighborhood, some above ground, and doubtless innumerable more beneath it; for, as in ancient Rome itself, an inundation of accumulated soil seems to have swept over what was the surface of that earlier day. The gateway which I am speaking about is probably buried to a third of its height, and perhaps has as perfect a Roman pavement (if sought for at the original depth) as that which runs beneath the Arch of Titus. It is a rude and massive structure, and seems as stalwart now as it could have been two thousand years ago; and though Time has gnawed it externally, he has made what amends he could by crowning its rough and broken summit with grass and weeds, and planting tufts of yellow flowers on the projections up and down the sides.

Nothing else comes to mind right now that needs to be noted about the inside of the Cathedral, except that we spotted a spot where the stone pavement had been worn down by the feet of ancient pilgrims as they knelt before a shrine of the Virgin. Leaving the Minster, we walked along a street that looked older than any we'd seen before, lined with houses that had tall, pointed roofs covered in red clay tiles. This path led us to a Roman arch, which used to be the entrance to a fortification and has stood over the English street since it was just a faint village path, for centuries prior. The arch is about four hundred yards from the Cathedral, and it's worth mentioning that there are Roman remains scattered throughout the area, some visible on the surface, and undoubtedly many more buried beneath it; similar to ancient Rome, a layer of accumulated soil seems to have covered what was once the surface from that earlier time. The gateway I'm talking about is probably buried up to a third of its height and likely still has a well-preserved Roman pavement (if you dig down to the original level) like the one found beneath the Arch of Titus. It’s a rough and sturdy structure, standing as strong now as it must have been two thousand years ago; and while Time has worn it down on the outside, it has at least tried to make some reparations by covering its rough and jagged top with grass and weeds, and by placing tufts of yellow flowers on the ledges along the sides.

There are the ruins of a Norman castle, built by the Conqueror, in pretty close proximity to the Cathedral; but the old gateway is obstructed by a modern door of wood, and we were denied admittance because some part of the precincts are used as a prison. We now rambled about on the broad back of the hill, which, besides the Minster and ruined castle, is the site of some stately and queer old houses, and of many mean little hovels. I suspect that all or most of the life of the present day has subsided into the lower town, and that only priests, poor people, and prisoners dwell in these upper regions. In the wide, dry moat, at the base of the castle-wall, are clustered whole colonies of small houses, some of brick, but the larger portion built of old stones which once made part of the Norman keep, or of Roman structures that existed before the Conqueror's castle was ever dreamed about. They are like toadstools that spring up from the mould of a decaying tree. Ugly as they are, they add wonderfully to the picturesqueness of the scene, being quite as valuable, in that respect, as the great, broad, ponderous ruin of the castle-keep, which rose high above our heads, heaving its huge gray mass out of a bank of green foliage and ornamental shrubbery, such as lilacs and other flowering plants, in which its foundations were completely hidden.

There are the ruins of a Norman castle, built by the Conqueror, located pretty close to the Cathedral; however, the old gateway is blocked by a modern wooden door, and we were refused entry because part of the grounds is used as a prison. We wandered around on the broad top of the hill, which, alongside the Minster and the ruined castle, is home to some grand and quirky old houses, as well as many small, shabby huts. I suspect that almost all of today's life has shifted down to the lower town, leaving only priests, poor people, and prisoners in these higher areas. In the wide, dry moat at the base of the castle wall, there are clusters of small houses, some made of brick, but most constructed from old stones that once were part of the Norman keep or Roman buildings that existed long before the Conqueror's castle was even imagined. They spring up like toadstools from the decay of a trees. Ugly as they are, they contribute beautifully to the charm of the scene, being just as valuable in that way as the great, broad, heavy ruin of the castle keep, which looms high above us, lifting its massive gray form out of a bank of green foliage and ornamental shrubs like lilacs and other flowering plants, completely hiding its foundations.

After walking quite round the castle, I made an excursion through the Roman gateway, along a pleasant and level road bordered with dwellings of various character. One or two were houses of gentility, with delightful and shadowy lawns before them; many had those high, red-tiled roofs, ascending into acutely pointed gables, which seem to belong to the same epoch as some of the edifices in our own earlier towns; and there were pleasant-looking cottages, very sylvan and rural, with hedges so dense and high, fencing them in, as almost to hide them up to the eaves of their thatched roofs. In front of one of these I saw various images, crosses, and relics of antiquity, among which were fragments of old Catholic tombstones, disposed by way of ornament.

After walking around the castle, I took a stroll through the Roman gateway, along a nice and flat road lined with different types of houses. A couple of them were elegant homes, with lovely shaded lawns in front; many had those tall, red-tiled roofs that peak sharply at the gables, which seem to belong to the same time period as some of the buildings in our older towns; and there were charming cottages, very rustic and countryside, with thick, tall hedges that almost concealed them up to the eaves of their thatched roofs. In front of one of these, I saw various images, crosses, and old relics, including fragments of ancient Catholic tombstones arranged as decoration.

We now went home to the Saracen's Head; and as the weather was very unpropitious, and it sprinkled a little now and then, I would gladly have felt myself released from further thraldom to the Cathedral. But it had taken possession of me, and would not let me be at rest; so at length I found myself compelled to climb the hill again, between daylight and dusk. A mist was now hovering about the upper height of the great central tower, so as to dim and half obliterate its battlements and pinnacles, even while I stood in the close beneath it. It was the most impressive view that I had had. The whole lower part of the structure was seen with perfect distinctness; but at the very summit the mist was so dense as to form an actual cloud, as well defined as ever I saw resting on a mountain-top. Really and literally, here was a "cloud-capt tower."

We returned home to the Saracen's Head, and since the weather was quite bad, with occasional drizzles, I would have happily welcomed a break from my ongoing connection to the Cathedral. But it had a hold on me and wouldn’t let me rest; eventually, I found myself forced to climb the hill again, caught between daylight and dusk. A mist was lingering around the top of the main tower, obscuring its battlements and pinnacles, even as I stood directly beneath it. It was the most stunning view I had experienced. The entire lower portion of the structure was perfectly clear, but at the very top, the fog was so thick it created an actual cloud, as distinct as any I had seen settled on a mountain peak. Truly, this was a "cloud-capt tower."

The entire Cathedral, too, transfigured itself into a richer beauty and more imposing majesty than ever. The longer I looked, the better I loved it. Its exterior is certainly far more beautiful than that of York Minster; and its finer effect is due, I think, to the many peaks in which the structure ascends, and to the pinnacles which, as it were, repeat and re-echo them into the sky. York Cathedral is comparatively square and angular in its general effect; but in this at Lincoln there is a continual mystery of variety, so that at every glance you are aware of a change, and a disclosure of something new, yet working an harmonious development of what you have heretofore seen. The west front is unspeakably grand, and may be read over and over again forever, and still show undetected meanings, like a great, broad page of marvellous writing in black-letter,—so many sculptured ornaments there are, blossoming out before your eyes, and gray statues that have grown there since you looked last, and empty niches, and a hundred airy canopies beneath which carved images used to be, and where they will show themselves again, if you gaze long enough.—But I will not say another word about the Cathedral.

The entire Cathedral transformed into a richer beauty and more impressive majesty than ever. The longer I looked, the more I loved it. Its exterior is definitely much prettier than that of York Minster, and I think its stunning effect comes from the many peaks the structure reaches and the pinnacles that seem to repeat and echo them into the sky. York Cathedral is relatively square and angular in its overall appearance; however, Lincoln's Cathedral has a constant mystery of variety, so every time you glance at it, you notice a change and reveal something new, all while harmoniously developing what you've already seen. The west front is incredibly grand, and you could keep looking at it endlessly, discovering new meanings like a huge, broad page of marvelous writing in black-letter—there are so many sculptured ornaments blooming before your eyes, gray statues that have appeared since your last visit, empty niches, and countless airy canopies that once held carved images and will reveal them again if you look long enough. But I won’t say another word about the Cathedral.

We spent the rest of the day within the sombre precincts of the Saracen's Head, reading yesterday's "Times," "The Guide-Book of Lincoln," and "The Directory of the Eastern Counties." Dismal as the weather was, the street beneath our window was enlivened with a great bustle and turmoil of people all the evening, because it was Saturday night, and they had accomplished their week's toil, received their wages, and were making their small purchases against Sunday, and enjoying themselves as well as they knew how. A band of music passed to and fro several times, with the rain-drops falling into the mouth of the brazen trumpet and pattering on the bass-drum; a spirit-shop, opposite the hotel, had a vast run of custom; and a coffee-dealer, in the open air, found occasional vent for his commodity, in spite of the cold water that dripped into the cups. The whole breadth of the street, between the Stone Bow and the bridge across the Witham, was thronged to overflowing, and humming with human life.

We spent the rest of the day in the gloomy confines of the Saracen's Head, reading yesterday's "Times," "The Guide-Book of Lincoln," and "The Directory of the Eastern Counties." Despite the dreary weather, the street below our window was alive with a bustling crowd all evening because it was Saturday night. People had finished their week's work, collected their pay, and were making small purchases for Sunday, trying to enjoy themselves as best as they could. A band went back and forth several times, with raindrops falling into the brass trumpet and pattering on the bass drum; a bar across from the hotel was busy; and a coffee vendor outdoors managed to sell some drinks, despite the water dripping into the cups. The entire stretch of the street, between the Stone Bow and the bridge over the Witham, was packed to capacity, buzzing with life.

Observing in the Guide-Book that a steamer runs on the river Witham between Lincoln and Boston, I inquired of the waiter, and learned that she was to start on Monday at ten o'clock. Thinking it might be an interesting trip, and a pleasant variation of our customary mode of travel, we determined to make the voyage. The Witham flows through Lincoln, crossing the main street under an arched bridge of Gothic construction, a little below the Saracen's Head. It has more the appearance of a canal than of a river, in its passage through the town,— being bordered with hewn-stone mason-work on each side, and provided with one or two locks. The steamer proved to be small, dirty, and altogether inconvenient. The early morning had been bright; but the sky now lowered upon us with a sulky English temper, and we had not long put off before we felt an ugly wind from the German Ocean blowing right in our teeth. There were a number of passengers on board, country-people, such as travel by third-class on the railway; for, I suppose, nobody but ourselves ever dreamt of voyaging by the steamer for the sake of what he might happen upon in the way of river-scenery.

Observing in the guidebook that a steamer operates on the River Witham between Lincoln and Boston, I asked the waiter and found out that it was scheduled to leave on Monday at ten o'clock. Thinking it could be an interesting trip and a nice change from our usual way of traveling, we decided to go on the journey. The Witham flows through Lincoln, crossing the main street under a Gothic arched bridge, just below the Saracen's Head. It looks more like a canal than a river as it passes through the town, with stone masonry lining both sides and one or two locks. The steamer turned out to be small, dirty, and quite inconvenient. The morning had been bright, but the sky now looked gloomy with typical English weather, and we hadn’t been out long before we felt a nasty wind from the German Ocean blowing directly at us. There were several passengers on board, local folks who travel third-class on the train; I guess no one but us would think of taking the steamer just for the scenery along the river.

We bothered a good while about getting through a preliminary lock; nor, when fairly under way, did we ever accomplish, I think, six miles an hour. Constant delays were caused, moreover, by stopping to take up passengers and freight,—not at regular landing-places, but anywhere along the green banks. The scenery was identical with that of the railway, because the latter runs along by the river-side through the whole distance, or nowhere departs from it except to make a short cut across some sinuosity; so that our only advantage lay in the drawling, snail-like slothfulness of our progress, which allowed us time enough and to spare for the objects along the shore. Unfortunately, there was nothing, or next to nothing, to be seen,—the country being one unvaried level over the whole thirty miles of our voyage,—not a hill in sight, either near or far, except that solitary one on the summit of which we had left Lincoln Cathedral. And the Cathedral was our landmark for four hours or more, and at last rather faded out than was hidden by any intervening object.

We spent quite a while trying to get through a preliminary lock; and even once we were actually moving, I doubt we ever went faster than six miles an hour. We kept getting delayed because we stopped to pick up passengers and cargo not at official stops, but anywhere along the green banks. The scenery was the same as what you see from the train, since the railway runs alongside the river the entire way, only veering away for brief shortcuts. Our only advantage came from our slow, snail-like pace, which gave us plenty of time to look at the things along the shore. Unfortunately, there wasn’t much to see—just flat land for the entire thirty miles of our trip—not a hill in sight, near or far, except for that lonely one where we had left Lincoln Cathedral. The Cathedral served as our landmark for more than four hours, and eventually it faded from view instead of being blocked by something in between.

It would have been a pleasantly lazy day enough, if the rough and bitter wind had not blown directly in our faces, and chilled us through, in spite of the sunshine that soon succeeded a sprinkle or two of rain. These English east-winds, which prevail from February till June, are greater nuisances than the east-wind of our own Atlantic coast, although they do not bring mist and storm, as with us, but some of the sunniest weather that England sees. Under their influence, the sky smiles and is villanous.

It could have been a nicely lazy day, if the harsh and biting wind hadn’t blown straight at us, chilling us to the bone, despite the sunshine that quickly followed a brief sprinkle of rain. These English east winds, which last from February to June, are more annoying than the east wind on our own Atlantic coast, even though they don’t bring mist and storms like we do, but rather some of the sunniest weather that England experiences. Under their influence, the sky looks cheerful yet treacherous.

The landscape was tame to the last degree, but had an English character that was abundantly worth our looking at. A green luxuriance of early grass; old, high-roofed farm-houses, surrounded by their stone barns and ricks of hay and grain; ancient villages, with the square, gray tower of a church seen afar over the level country, amid the cluster of red roofs; here and there a shadowy grove of venerable trees, surrounding what was perhaps an Elizabethan hall, though it looked more like the abode of some rich yeoman. Once, too, we saw the tower of a mediaeval castle, that of Tattershall, built, by a Cromwell, but whether of the Protector's family I cannot tell. But the gentry do not appear to have settled multitudinously in this tract of country; nor is it to be wondered at, since a lover of the picturesque would as soon think of settling in Holland. The river retains its canal-like aspect all along; and only in the latter part of its course does it become more than wide enough for the little steamer to turn itself round,—at broadest, not more than twice that width.

The landscape was incredibly tame but had an English vibe that was definitely worth our time. A vibrant stretch of fresh green grass; old, tall farmhouses surrounded by stone barns and stacks of hay and grain; ancient villages with the square, gray church tower visible from far away among the clusters of red roofs; occasionally, a shady grove of old trees encircling what might have been an Elizabethan hall, though it seemed more like the home of a prosperous farmer. We also spotted the tower of a medieval castle, Tattershall, built by a Cromwell, though I can’t say if it was from the Protector's family. However, the wealthy didn’t seem to settle in this part of the country very much; it’s not surprising, since someone who loves picturesque views would likely not choose to live in Holland. The river has a canal-like look throughout, and only towards the end of its path does it become wide enough for the little steamer to turn around—at its widest, not much more than twice that size.

The only memorable incident of our voyage happened when a mother-duck was leading her little fleet of five ducklings across the river, just as our steamer went swaggering by, stirring the quiet stream into great waves that lashed the banks on either side. I saw the imminence of the catastrophe, and hurried to the stern of the boat to witness its consummation, since I could not possibly avert it. The poor ducklings had uttered their baby-quacks, and striven with all their tiny might to escape; four of them, I believe, were washed aside and thrown off unhurt from the steamer's prow; but the fifth must have gone under the whole length of the keel, and never could have come up alive.

The only memorable moment of our trip happened when a mother duck was leading her little group of five ducklings across the river, just as our steamboat passed by, creating big waves that crashed against the banks on either side. I realized a disaster was about to happen and rushed to the back of the boat to see it unfold, since I couldn't do anything to stop it. The poor ducklings had let out their squeaky quacks and tried their hardest to escape; four of them, I think, were pushed aside and thrown off unhurt by the boat's front, but the fifth must have gone entirely under the boat and would never have surfaced alive.

At last, in mid-afternoon, we beheld the tall tower of Saint Botolph's Church (three hundred feet high, the same elevation as the tallest tower of Lincoln Cathedral) looming in the distance. At about half past four we reached Boston (which name has been shortened, in the course of ages, by the quick and slovenly English pronunciation, from Botolph's town), and were taken by a cab to the Peacock, in the market-place. It was the best hotel in town, though a poor one enough; and we were shown into a small, stifled parlor, dingy, musty, and scented with stale tobacco-smoke,—tobacco-smoke two days old, for the waiter assured us that the room had not more recently been fumigated. An exceedingly grim waiter he was, apparently a genuine descendant of the old Puritans of this English Boston, and quite as sour as those who people the daughter-city in New England. Our parlor had the one recommendation of looking into the market-place, and affording a sidelong glimpse of the tall spire and noble old church.

At last, in the middle of the afternoon, we saw the tall tower of Saint Botolph's Church (three hundred feet high, the same height as the tallest tower of Lincoln Cathedral) looming in the distance. Around 4:30 PM, we arrived in Boston (a name that has been shortened over time by the quick and careless English pronunciation from Botolph's town), and took a cab to the Peacock in the market square. It was the best hotel in town, though still quite shabby; we were shown into a small, stuffy parlor that was dingy, musty, and smelled of stale tobacco smoke—two-day-old tobacco smoke, as the waiter informed us that the room hadn’t been cleaned recently. The waiter was extremely grim, clearly a true descendant of the old Puritans of this English Boston, and just as sour as those in the daughter city in New England. Our parlor had the one advantage of looking out onto the market square and giving a sideways view of the tall spire and the grand old church.

In my first ramble about the town, chance led me to the river-side, at that quarter where the port is situated. Here were long buildings of an old-fashioned aspect, seemingly warehouses, with windows in the high, steep roofs. The Custom-House found ample accommodation within an ordinary dwelling-house. Two or three large schooners were moored along the river's brink, which had here a stone margin; another large and handsome schooner was evidently just finished, rigged and equipped for her first voyage; the rudiments of another were on the stocks, in a shipyard bordering on the river. Still another, while I was looking on, came up the stream, and lowered her mainsail, from a foreign voyage. An old man on the bank hailed her and inquired about her cargo; but the Lincolnshire people have such a queer way of talking English that I could not understand the reply. Farther down the river, I saw a brig, approaching rapidly under sail. The whole scene made an odd impression of bustle, and sluggishness, and decay, and a remnant of wholesome life; and I could not but contrast it with the mighty and populous activity of our own Boston, which was once the feeble infant of this old English town;—the latter, perhaps, almost stationary ever since that day, as if the birth of such an offspring had taken away its own principle of growth. I thought of Long Wharf, and Faneuil Hall, and Washington Street, and the Great Elm, and the State House, and exulted lustily,—but yet began to feel at home in this good old town, for its very name's sake, as I never had before felt, in England.

During my first stroll around town, I happened upon the riverside, right where the port is located. There were long buildings that looked quite old-fashioned, probably warehouses, with windows set in their high, steep roofs. The Custom-House was comfortably located within a regular house. Two or three large schooners were docked along the river's edge, which had a stone border; another large and attractive schooner looked like it was just finished, rigged, and ready for its first journey; parts of another were being built at a shipyard by the river. While I was watching, yet another schooner came up the stream and lowered its mainsail after a trip abroad. An old man on the bank called out to her and asked about her cargo, but the people from Lincolnshire spoke such a strange form of English that I couldn't understand the answer. Further down the river, I spotted a brig coming towards us quickly under sail. The whole scene gave off a strange mix of activity, stillness, decay, and a touch of vibrant life; I couldn't help but compare it to the bustling energy of our own Boston, which was once the weak little sister of this old English town; the latter seeming to have been almost stagnant since that time, as if the birth of such a thriving city had drained it of its own drive to grow. I thought about Long Wharf, Faneuil Hall, Washington Street, the Great Elm, and the State House, and felt a rush of pride—but I also began to feel a sense of belonging in this charming old town like I never felt before in England.

The next morning we came out in the early sunshine (the sun must have been shining nearly four hours, however, for it was after eight o'clock), and strolled about the streets, like people who had a right to be there. The market-place of Boston is an irregular square, into one end of which the chancel of the church slightly projects. The gates of the churchyard were open and free to all passengers, and the common footway of the townspeople seems to lie to and fro across it. It is paved, according to English custom, with flat tombstones; and there are also raised or altar tombs, some of which have armorial hearings on them. One clergyman has caused himself and his wife to be buried right in the middle of the stone-bordered path that traverses the churchyard; so that not an individual of the thousands who pass along this public way can help trampling over him or her. The scene, nevertheless, was very cheerful in the morning sun: people going about their business in the day's primal freshness, which was just as fresh here as in younger villages; children with milk-pails, loitering over the burial-stones; school-boys playing leap-frog with the altar-tombs; the simple old town preparing itself for the day, which would be like myriads of other days that had passed over it, but yet would be worth living through. And down on the churchyard, where were buried many generations whom it remembered in their time, looked the stately tower of Saint Botolph; and it was good to see and think of such an age-long giant, intermarrying the present epoch with a distant past, and getting quite imbued with human nature by being so immemorially connected with men's familiar knowledge and homely interests. It is a noble tower; and the jackdaws evidently have pleasant homes in their hereditary nests among its topmost windows, and live delightful lives, flitting and cawing about its pinnacles and flying buttresses. I should almost like to be a jackdaw myself, for the sake of living up there.

The next morning, we stepped out into the early sunshine (the sun must have been up for nearly four hours already, since it was after eight o'clock) and wandered the streets like we belonged there. The market square of Boston is an irregular shape, with the church’s chancel slightly jutting into one end. The churchyard gates were wide open for everyone, and the local footpath seemed to wind back and forth across it. It's paved, as is typical in England, with flat tombstones, and there are also raised altars, some of which have coat-of-arms on them. One clergyman had arranged to be buried right in the middle of the stone-bordered path running through the churchyard, meaning that everyone passing by would inevitably walk over him or his wife. Still, the scene was quite cheerful in the morning sun: people going about their day with a fresh energy, just as vibrant as in younger towns; children with milk pails, lingering over the gravestones; schoolboys playing leapfrog with the altar tombs; the simple old town getting ready for a day that would be just like countless others that had come before, yet still worth experiencing. And down in the churchyard, where many generations are buried and remembered, stood the grand tower of Saint Botolph; it was nice to see such an ancient giant, connecting the present with a distant past, becoming intertwined with the everyday lives and interests of people. It is an impressive tower; the jackdaws clearly have cozy homes in their longstanding nests among its highest windows, enjoying their lives as they flit and caw around its peaks and flying buttresses. I almost wish I could be a jackdaw myself, just to live up there.

In front of the church, not more than twenty yards off, and with a low brick wall between, flows the river Witham. On the hither bank a fisherman was washing his boat; and another skiff, with her sail lazily half twisted, lay on the opposite strand. The stream at this point is about of such width, that, if the tall tower were to tumble over flat on its face, its top-stone might perhaps reach to the middle of the channel. On the farther shore there is a line of antique-looking houses, with roofs of red tile, and windows opening out of them,—some of these dwellings being so ancient, that the Reverend Mr. Cotton, subsequently our first Boston minister, must have seen them with his own bodily eyes, when he used to issue from the front-portal after service. Indeed, there must be very many houses here, and even some streets, that bear much the aspect that they did when the Puritan divine paced solemnly among them.

In front of the church, not more than twenty yards away, and separated by a low brick wall, flows the river Witham. On this side of the bank, a fisherman was washing his boat, and another skiff, with its sail lazily half-twisted, rested on the opposite shore. At this point, the stream is about wide enough that if the tall tower were to fall flat on its face, its top might just reach the middle of the channel. On the other side, there’s a row of old-looking houses with red tile roofs and windows that stick out from them—some of these homes are so ancient that Reverend Mr. Cotton, who later became our first minister in Boston, must have seen them with his own eyes when he would come out of the front door after service. In fact, there must be many houses here, and even some streets, that look pretty much the same as they did when the Puritan minister walked solemnly among them.

In our rambles about town, we went into a bookseller's shop to inquire if he had any description of Boston for sale. He offered me (or, rather, produced for inspection, not supposing that I would buy it) a quarto history of the town, published by subscription, nearly forty years ago. The bookseller showed himself a well-informed and affable man, and a local antiquary, to whom a party of inquisitive strangers were a godsend. He had met with several Americans, who, at various times, had come on pilgrimages to this place, and he had been in correspondence with others. Happening to have heard the name of one member of our party, he showed us great courtesy and kindness, and invited us into his inner domicile, where, as he modestly intimated, he kept a few articles which it might interest us to see. So we went with him through the shop, up stairs, into the private part of his establishment; and, really, it was one of the rarest adventures I ever met with, to stumble upon this treasure of a man, with his treasury of antiquities and curiosities, veiled behind the unostentatious front of a bookseller's shop, in a very moderate line of village business. The two up-stair rooms into which he introduced us were so crowded with inestimable articles, that we were almost afraid to stir for fear of breaking some fragile thing that had been accumulating value for unknown centuries.

During our stroll around town, we stopped by a bookstore to see if they had any descriptions of Boston for sale. The bookseller showed me a quarto history of the town, published by subscription nearly forty years ago, thinking I might not actually buy it. He was a well-informed and friendly guy, a local enthusiast, and his shop was a blessing for curious visitors. He had encountered several Americans over the years who came to visit this place, and he'd been in touch with others. When he recognized the name of someone in our group, he treated us with great courtesy and kindness, inviting us into his private space, where he hinted he had a few items that might interest us. So, we followed him through the shop and up the stairs to the private part of his business; it turned out to be one of the most unexpected adventures I’ve ever had, discovering this amazing man with his treasure trove of antiques and curiosities hidden behind the humble facade of a bookstore in a modest little town. The two rooms upstairs he showed us were packed with invaluable items, and we were almost afraid to move for fear of breaking something delicate that had been gaining value for unknown centuries.

The apartment was hung round with pictures and old engravings, many of which were extremely rare. Premising that he was going to show us something very curious, Mr. Porter went into the next room and returned with a counterpane of fine linen, elaborately embroidered with silk, which so profusely covered the linen that the general effect was as if the main texture were silken. It was stained and seemed very old, and had an ancient fragrance. It was wrought all over with birds and flowers in a most delicate style of needlework, and among other devices, more than once repeated, was the cipher, M. S.,—being the initials of one of the most unhappy names that ever a woman bore. This quilt was embroidered by the hands of Mary Queen of Scots, during her imprisonment at Fotheringay Castle; and having evidently been a work of years, she had doubtless shed many tears over it, and wrought many doleful thoughts and abortive schemes into its texture, along with the birds and flowers. As a counterpart to this most precious relic, our friend produced some of the handiwork of a former Queen of Otaheite, presented by her to Captain Cook; it was a bag, cunningly made of some delicate vegetable stuff, and ornamented with feathers. Next, he brought out a green silk waistcoat of very antique fashion, trimmed about the edges and pocket-holes with a rich and delicate embroidery of gold and silver. This (as the possessor of the treasure proved, by tracing its pedigree till it came into his hands) was once the vestment of Queen Elizabeth's Lord Burleigh; but that great statesman must have been a person of very moderate girth in the chest and waist; for the garment was hardly more than a comfortable fit for a boy of eleven, the smallest American of our party, who tried on the gorgeous waistcoat. Then, Mr. Porter produced some curiously engraved drinking-glasses, with a view of Saint Botolph's steeple on one of them, and other Boston edifices, public or domestic, on the remaining two, very admirably done. These crystal goblets had been a present, long ago, to an old master of the Free School from his pupils; and it is very rarely, I imagine, that a retired schoolmaster can exhibit such trophies of gratitude and affection, won from the victims of his birch rod.

The apartment was decorated with pictures and old engravings, many of which were extremely rare. Stating that he was going to show us something very interesting, Mr. Porter stepped into the next room and returned with a fine linen coverlet, elaborately embroidered with silk, which was so heavily adorned that it looked silk-like. It was stained, appeared very old, and carried an ancient scent. It was covered all over with birds and flowers in a delicate style of needlework, and among other motifs, the initials M. S., representing one of the most unfortunate names ever borne by a woman, appeared multiple times. This quilt was embroidered by Mary Queen of Scots during her imprisonment at Fotheringay Castle; having evidently taken years to complete, she must have shed many tears over it, infusing it with her sorrowful thoughts and failed schemes along with the birds and flowers. As a counterpart to this precious relic, our friend showcased some work from a former Queen of Otaheite, given to Captain Cook; it was a bag, skillfully crafted from some delicate plant material and adorned with feathers. Next, he pulled out a green silk waistcoat in a very old style, trimmed around the edges and pocket holes with rich, delicate gold and silver embroidery. This (as the owner proved by tracking its history until it came into his possession) was once worn by Lord Burleigh, a statesman of Queen Elizabeth; but that great figure must have had a fairly slender build, as the garment barely fit our smallest member, an eleven-year-old boy from our group, who tried it on. Then, Mr. Porter presented some intricately engraved drinking glasses, one featuring a view of Saint Botolph's steeple and the other two showcasing various Boston buildings, both public and private, done very beautifully. These crystal goblets had long ago been a gift to a former master of the Free School from his students; it’s very rare, I imagine, that a retired schoolmaster can display such tokens of gratitude and affection from those he once disciplined.

Our kind friend kept bringing out one unexpected and wholly unexpectable thing after another, as if he were a magician, and had only to fling a private signal into the air, and some attendant imp would hand forth any strange relic we might choose to ask for. He was especially rich in drawings by the Old Masters, producing two or three, of exquisite delicacy, by Raphael, one by Salvator, a head by Rembrandt, and others, in chalk or pen-and-ink, by Giordano, Benvenuto Cellini, and hands almost as famous; and besides what were shown us, there seemed to be an endless supply of these art-treasures in reserve. On the wall hung a crayon-portrait of Sterne, never engraved, representing him as a rather young man, blooming, and not uncomely; it was the worldly face of a man fond of pleasure, but without that ugly, keen, sarcastic, odd expression that we see in his only engraved portrait. The picture is an original, and must needs be very valuable; and we wish it might be prefixed to some new and worthier biography of a writer whose character the world has always treated with singular harshness, considering how much it owes him. There was likewise a crayon-portrait of Sterne's wife, looking so haughty and unamiable, that the wonder is, not that he ultimately left her, but how he ever contrived to live a week with such an awful woman.

Our kind friend kept pulling out one surprising and totally unexpected thing after another, as if he were a magician who just needed to throw a secret signal into the air for some little helper to bring us any strange relic we wanted. He had an amazing collection of drawings by the Old Masters, showing us two or three exquisite pieces by Raphael, one by Salvator, a head by Rembrandt, and others in chalk or pen-and-ink by Giordano, Benvenuto Cellini, and other almost equally famous artists; and besides what he showed us, it seemed like there was an endless supply of these art treasures waiting in reserve. On the wall hung a crayon portrait of Sterne, never engraved, showing him as a relatively young man, fresh-faced and not unattractive; it was the face of someone who enjoyed life, but without that harsh, sharp, sarcastic expression that we see in his only engraved portrait. The picture is an original and must be very valuable; we hope it could be included at the beginning of some new and more deserving biography of a writer whose character the world has always treated with surprising harshness, considering how much it owes him. There was also a crayon portrait of Sterne's wife, looking so proud and unfriendly that it's surprising not just that he eventually left her, but how he managed to live even a week with such a difficult woman.

After looking at these, and a great many more things than I can remember, above stairs, we went down to a parlor, where this wonderful bookseller opened an old cabinet, containing numberless drawers, and looking just fit to be the repository of such knick-knacks as were stored up in it. He appeared to possess more treasures than he himself knew off, or knew where to find; but, rummaging here and there, he brought forth things new and old: rose-nobles, Victoria crowns, gold angels, double sovereigns of George IV., two-guinea pieces of George II.; a marriage-medal of the first Napoleon, only forty-five of which were ever struck off, and of which even the British Museum does not contain a specimen like this, in gold; a brass medal, three or four inches in diameter, of a Roman emperor; together with buckles, bracelets, amulets, and I know not what besides. There was a green silk tassel from the fringe of Queen Mary's bed at Holyrood Palace. There were illuminated missals, antique Latin Bibles, and (what may seem of especial interest to the historian) a Secret-Book of Queen Elizabeth, in manuscript, written, for aught I know, by her own hand. On examination, however, it proved to contain, not secrets of state, but recipes for dishes, drinks, medicines, washes, and all such matters of housewifery, the toilet, and domestic quackery, among which we were horrified by the title of one of the nostrums, "How to kill a Fellow quickly"! We never doubted that bloody Queen Bess might often have had occasion for such a recipe, but wondered at her frankness, and at her attending to these anomalous necessities in such a methodical way. The truth is, we had read amiss, and the Queen had spelt amiss: the word was "Fellon,"—a sort of whitlow,—not "Fellow."

After checking out these items, along with many more than I can remember, upstairs, we headed down to a parlor where this amazing bookseller opened an old cabinet filled with countless drawers, just perfect for holding the odd items stored inside it. He seemed to have more treasures than he even knew about or could find; but, digging around, he pulled out various things, both new and old: rose-nobles, Victorian crowns, gold angels, double sovereigns from George IV, two-guinea pieces from George II; a marriage medal from Napoleon, of which only forty-five were ever made, and the British Museum doesn’t even have a similar one in gold; a brass medal, three or four inches across, featuring a Roman emperor; along with buckles, bracelets, amulets, and so much more. There was a green silk tassel from the fringe of Queen Mary's bed at Holyrood Palace. There were illuminated missals, antique Latin Bibles, and (what might be of special interest to historians) a Secret Book of Queen Elizabeth, in manuscript, possibly written by her own hand. However, upon closer inspection, it turned out to contain not state secrets, but recipes for dishes, drinks, medicines, washes, and all kinds of household tips, including one horrifyingly titled "How to kill a Fellow quickly"! We never doubted that bloody Queen Bess might have had reasons for such a recipe, but we were taken aback by her straightforwardness and her methodical attention to these peculiar needs. The truth is, we had misread, and the Queen had misspelled: the word was "Fellon,"—a type of whitlow,—not "Fellow."

Our hospitable friend now made us drink a glass of wine, as old and genuine as the curiosities of his cabinet; and while sipping it, we ungratefully tried to excite his envy, by telling of various things, interesting to an antiquary and virtuoso, which we had seen in the course of our travels about England. We spoke, for instance, of a missal bound in solid gold and set around with jewels, but of such intrinsic value as no setting could enhance, for it was exquisitely illuminated, throughout, by the hand of Raphael himself. We mentioned a little silver case which once contained a portion of the heart of Louis XIV. nicely done up in spices, but, to the owner's horror and astonishment, Dean Buckland popped the kingly morsel into his mouth, and swallowed it. We told about the black-letter prayer-book of King Charles the Martyr, used by him upon the scaffold, taking which into our hands, it opened of itself at the Communion Service; and there, on the left-hand page, appeared a spot about as large as a sixpence, of a yellowish or brownish hue: a drop of the King's blood had fallen there.

Our friendly host poured us a glass of wine, as old and authentic as the curiosities in his collection. While we were sipping it, we ungratefully tried to make him envious by sharing various interesting things we had encountered during our travels around England, things that would fascinate an antiquarian or art lover. For example, we talked about a missal bound in solid gold and adorned with jewels, but of such intrinsic worth that no embellishments could improve it, as it was beautifully illuminated throughout by Raphael himself. We mentioned a small silver case that once held a piece of the heart of Louis XIV, carefully preserved in spices, but to the owner's shock and horror, Dean Buckland popped the royal morsel into his mouth and swallowed it. We also recounted the black-letter prayer book of King Charles the Martyr, which he used on the scaffold. When we held it, it magically opened to the Communion Service, and there, on the left-hand page, was a spot about the size of a sixpence, a yellowish or brownish color: a drop of the King's blood had landed there.

Mr. Porter now accompanied us to the church, but first leading us to a vacant spot of ground where old John Cotton's vicarage had stood till a very short time since. According to our friend's description, it was a humble habitation, of the cottage order, built of brick, with a thatched roof. The site is now rudely fenced in, and cultivated as a vegetable garden. In the right-hand aisle of the church there is an ancient chapel, which, at the time of our visit, was in process of restoration, and was to be dedicated to Mr. Cotton, whom these English people consider as the founder of our American Boston. It would contain a painted memorial-window, in honor of the old Puritan minister. A festival in commemoration of the event was to take place in the ensuing July, to which I had myself received an invitation, but I knew too well the pains and penalties incurred by an invited guest at public festivals in England to accept it. It ought to be recorded (and it seems to have made a very kindly impression on our kinsfolk here) that five hundred pounds had been contributed by persons in the United States, principally in Boston, towards the cost of the memorial-window, and the repair and restoration of the chapel.

Mr. Porter now took us to the church, but first led us to an empty piece of land where old John Cotton's vicarage had been until recently. According to our friend's description, it was a modest cottage made of brick, with a thatched roof. The area is now roughly fenced off and used as a vegetable garden. In the right-hand aisle of the church, there is an old chapel that was being restored during our visit, which was to be dedicated to Mr. Cotton, who these English people consider the founder of our American Boston. It will have a painted memorial window in honor of the old Puritan minister. A festival to celebrate the event was set for the following July, and I had received an invitation, but I knew all too well the troubles that come with being an invited guest at public festivals in England, so I declined. It should be noted (and it seems to have made a very positive impression on our relatives here) that five hundred pounds had been contributed by people in the United States, mainly from Boston, toward the cost of the memorial window and the repair and restoration of the chapel.

After we emerged from the chapel, Mr. Porter approached us with the vicar, to whom he kindly introduced us, and then took his leave. May a stranger's benediction rest upon him! He is a most pleasant man; rather, I imagine, a virtuoso than an antiquary; for he seemed to value the Queen of Otaheite's bag as highly as Queen Mary's embroidered quilt, and to have an omnivorous appetite for everything strange and rare. Would that we could fill up his shelves and drawers (if there are any vacant spaces left) with the choicest trifles that have dropped out of Time's carpet-bag, or give him the carpet-bag itself, to take out what he will!

After we came out of the chapel, Mr. Porter approached us with the vicar, whom he kindly introduced us to, and then he took his leave. May a stranger’s blessing be upon him! He’s a very pleasant man; I think he’s more of a connoisseur than a collector, because he seemed to value the Queen of Otaheite’s bag just as much as Queen Mary’s embroidered quilt, and he has an insatiable curiosity for everything unusual and rare. I wish we could fill his shelves and drawers (if there are any empty spots left) with the finest little treasures that have fallen out of Time’s bag, or even give him the bag itself to pick from!

The vicar looked about thirty years old, a gentleman, evidently assured of his position (as clergymen of the Established Church invariably are), comfortable and well-to-do, a scholar and a Christian, and fit to be a bishop, knowing how to make the most of life without prejudice to the life to come. I was glad to see such a model English priest so suitably accommodated with an old English church. He kindly and courteously did the honors, showing us quite round the interior, giving us all the information that we required, and then leaving us to the quiet enjoyment of what we came to see.

The vicar looked about thirty years old, a gentleman clearly confident in his role (as clergymen of the Established Church typically are), comfortable and well-off, a scholar and a Christian, fit to be a bishop, knowing how to enjoy life without compromising the afterlife. I was pleased to see such an ideal English priest well-suited to an old English church. He graciously and courteously showed us around the interior, providing all the information we needed, and then left us to quietly appreciate what we came to see.

The interior of Saint Botolph's is very fine and satisfactory, as stately, almost, as a cathedral, and has been repaired—so far as repairs were necessary—in a chaste and noble style. The great eastern window is of modern painted glass, but is the richest, mellowest, and tenderest modern window that I have ever seen: the art of painting these glowing transparencies in pristine perfection being one that the world has lost. The vast, clear space of the interior church delighted me. There was no screen,—nothing between the vestibule and the altar to break the long vista; even the organ stood aside,—though it by and by made us aware of its presence by a melodious roar. Around the walls there were old engraved brasses, and a stone coffin, and an alabaster knight of Saint John, and an alabaster lady, each recumbent at full length, as large as life, and in perfect preservation, except for a slight modern touch at the tips of their noses. In the chancel we saw a great deal of oaken work, quaintly and admirably carved, especially about the seats formerly appropriated to the monks, which were so contrived as to tumble down with a tremendous crash, if the occupant happened to fall asleep.

The inside of Saint Botolph's is really impressive and satisfying, almost as grand as a cathedral, and has been restored—where needed—in a simple and elegant style. The large eastern window is made of modern stained glass, but it's the most beautiful, soft, and delicate modern window I've ever seen: the skill of creating these vivid, transparent artworks in perfect clarity is something that's been lost to the world. The spacious interior of the church amazed me. There was no barrier—nothing between the entrance and the altar to interrupt the long sightline; even the organ was off to the side—but eventually made its presence known with a harmonious sound. The walls featured old engraved brass plates, a stone coffin, and alabaster figures of a knight and a lady from Saint John, both lying flat as life-size and in excellent condition, except for a minor modern touch on the tips of their noses. In the chancel, we saw a lot of wooden work, uniquely and beautifully carved, particularly around the seats that used to be for the monks, which were designed to collapse with a loud crash if the person sitting in them fell asleep.

We now essayed to climb into the upper regions. Up we went, winding and still winding round the circular stairs, till we came to the gallery beneath the stone roof of the tower, whence we could look down and see the raised Font, and my Talma lying on one of the steps, and looking about as big as a pocket-handkerchief. Then up again, up, up, up, through a yet smaller staircase, till we emerged into another stone gallery, above the jackdaws, and far above the roof beneath which we had before made a halt. Then up another flight, which led us into a pinnacle of the temple, but not the highest; so, retracing our steps, we took the right turret this time, and emerged into the loftiest lantern, where we saw level Lincolnshire, far and near, though with a haze on the distant horizon. There were dusty roads, a river, and canals, converging towards Boston, which—a congregation of red-tiled roofs—lay beneath our feet, with pygmy people creeping about its narrow streets. We were three hundred feet aloft, and the pinnacle on which we stood is a landmark forty miles at sea.

We set out to climb to the upper levels. We went up, winding and still winding around the circular stairs, until we reached the gallery beneath the stone roof of the tower, where we could look down and see the raised Font, and my Talma lying on one of the steps, appearing as small as a pocket handkerchief. Then we went up again, up, up, up, through an even smaller staircase, until we emerged into another stone gallery, above the jackdaws, and well above the roof where we had previously paused. We then went up another flight, which took us into a pinnacle of the temple, but not the highest; so, retracing our steps, we chose the right turret this time, and came out into the tallest lantern, where we saw flat Lincolnshire, near and far, though there was a haze on the distant horizon. There were dusty roads, a river, and canals converging towards Boston, which—a cluster of red-tiled roofs—lay beneath us, with tiny people moving around its narrow streets. We were three hundred feet up, and the pinnacle we stood on is a landmark forty miles out to sea.

Content, and weary of our elevation, we descended the corkscrew stairs and left the church; the last object that we noticed in the interior being a bird, which appeared to be at home there, and responded with its cheerful notes to the swell of the organ. Pausing on the church-steps, we observed that there were formerly two statues, one on each side of the doorway; the canopies still remaining and the pedestals being about a yard from the ground. Some of Mr. Cotton's Puritan parishioners are probably responsible for the disappearance of these stone saints. This doorway at the base of the tower is now much dilapidated, but must once have been very rich and of a peculiar fashion. It opens its arch through a great square tablet of stone, reared against the front of the tower. On most of the projections, whether on the tower or about the body of the church, there are gargoyles of genuine Gothic grotesqueness,—fiends, beasts, angels, and combinations of all three; and where portions of the edifice are restored, the modern sculptors have tried to imitate these wild fantasies, but with very poor success. Extravagance and absurdity have still their law, and should pay as rigid obedience to it as the primmest things on earth.

Content and tired of our climb, we went down the spiral stairs and left the church. The last thing we noticed inside was a bird that seemed to feel right at home there, chirping happily along with the music from the organ. Pausing on the church steps, we saw that there used to be two statues, one on each side of the doorway; the canopies are still there, and the pedestals are about a yard high. Some of Mr. Cotton's Puritan parishioners likely had a hand in the removal of these stone saints. This doorway at the base of the tower is now quite worn down, but it must have once been quite ornate and unique. It opens into an arch through a large square stone slab set against the front of the tower. Most of the projections, whether on the tower or around the body of the church, are adorned with gargoyles that have true Gothic grotesqueness—fiends, beasts, angels, and mixes of all three; and where parts of the building have been restored, modern sculptors have attempted to replicate these wild designs but with very little success. Extravagance and absurdity still follow their own rules and should adhere to them as strictly as the most proper things on earth.

In our further rambles about Boston, we crossed the river by a bridge, and observed that the larger part of the town seems to be on that side of its navigable stream. The crooked streets and narrow lanes reminded me much of Hanover Street, Ann Street, and other portions of the North End of our American Boston, as I remember that picturesque region in my boyish days. It is not unreasonable to suppose that the local habits and recollections of the first settlers may have had some influence on the physical character of the streets and houses in the New England metropolis; at any rate, here is a similar intricacy of bewildering lanes, and numbers of old peaked and projecting-storied dwellings, such as I used to see there. It is singular what a home-feeling and sense of kindred I derived from this hereditary connection and fancied physiognomical resemblance between the old town and its well-grown daughter, and how reluctant I was, after chill years of banishment, to leave this hospitable place, on that account. Moreover, it recalled some of the features of another American town, my own dear native place, when I saw the seafaring people leaning against posts, and sitting on planks, under the lee of warehouses,—or lolling on long-boats, drawn up high and dry, as sailors and old wharf-rats are accustomed to do, in seaports of little business. In other respects, the English town is more village-like than either of the American ones. The women and budding girls chat together at their doors, and exchange merry greetings with young men; children chase one another in the summer twilight; school-boys sail little boats on the river, or play at marbles across the flat tombstones in the churchyard; and ancient men, in breeches and long waistcoats, wander slowly about the streets, with a certain familiarity of deportment, as if each one were everybody's grandfather. I have frequently observed, in old English towns, that Old Age comes forth more cheerfully and genially into the sunshine than among ourselves, where the rush, stir, bustle, and irreverent energy of youth are so preponderant, that the poor, forlorn grandsires begin to doubt whether they have a right to breathe in such a world any longer, and so hide their silvery heads in solitude. Speaking of old men, I am reminded of the scholars of the Boston Charity School, who walk about in antique, long-skirted blue coats, and knee-breeches, and with bands at their necks,—perfect and grotesque pictures of the costume of three centuries ago.

During our continued walks around Boston, we crossed the river via a bridge and noticed that most of the town seems to be on that side of the navigable stream. The winding streets and narrow alleyways reminded me a lot of Hanover Street, Ann Street, and other areas of the North End of our American Boston, as I recall that picturesque neighborhood from my childhood. It’s not unreasonable to think that the customs and memories of the first settlers influenced the layout of the streets and houses in this New England city; at least, here is a similar maze of confusing lanes and many old, peaked, and projecting homes, just like the ones I used to see there. It’s interesting how much of a sense of home and connection I felt from this inherited bond and imagined resemblance between the old town and its well-established daughter, and how hesitant I was, after many years away, to leave this welcoming place for that reason. Furthermore, it brought back memories of another American town, my beloved hometown, when I saw the seafaring folks leaning against posts and sitting on planks under the protection of warehouses—or lounging on longboats pulled up high and dry, like sailors and old wharf rats do in ports with little activity. In other ways, the English town feels more village-like than either of the American ones. Women and young girls chat at their doorways and exchange cheerful greetings with the young men; children chase each other during the summer twilight; schoolboys sail small boats on the river or play marbles on the flat tombstones in the churchyard; and elderly men, in breeches and long waistcoats, wander the streets slowly, with a familiarity that makes it seem like each one is everyone's grandfather. I've often noticed in old English towns that old age steps out into the sunshine with more joy and warmth than it does with us, where the rush, excitement, and irreverent energy of youth are so dominant that poor, lonely grandfathers start to question whether they have the right to exist in such a world anymore, and thus hide their silver heads in solitude. Speaking of old men, I am reminded of the scholars from the Boston Charity School, who walk around in vintage, long blue coats and knee breeches, complete with neck bands—perfect and amusing representations of the fashion from three centuries ago.

On the morning of our departure, I looked from the parlor-window of the Peacock into the market-place, and beheld its irregular square already well covered with booths, and more in progress of being put up, by stretching tattered sail-cloth on poles. It was market-day. The dealers were arranging their commodities, consisting chiefly of vegetables, the great bulk of which seemed to be cabbages. Later in the forenoon there was a much greater variety of merchandise: basket-work, both for fancy and use; twig-brooms, beehives, oranges, rustic attire; all sorts of things, in short, that are commonly sold at a rural fair. I heard the lowing of cattle, too, and the bleating of sheep, and found that there was a market for cows, oxen, and pigs, in another part of the town. A crowd of towns-people and Lincolnshire yeomen elbowed one another in the square; Mr. Punch was squeaking in one corner, and a vagabond juggler tried to find space for his exhibition in another: so that my final glimpse of Boston was calculated to leave a livelier impression than my former ones. Meanwhile the tower of Saint Botolph's looked benignantly down; and I fancied it was bidding me farewell, as it did Mr. Cotton, two or three hundred years ago, and telling me to describe its venerable height, and the town beneath it, to the people of the American city, who are partly akin, if not to the living inhabitants of Old Boston, yet to some of the dust that lies in its churchyard.

On the morning of our departure, I looked out from the parlor window of the Peacock into the marketplace and saw its uneven square already bustling with booths, with more being set up, using tattered sailcloth stretched over poles. It was market day. Vendors were arranging their goods, mostly vegetables, with a huge amount of them being cabbages. Later in the morning, there was a much wider range of products: baskets, both decorative and functional; twig brooms, beehives, oranges, rustic clothing; all kinds of things typically sold at a country fair. I also heard the mooing of cattle and the bleating of sheep, and I learned that there was a market for cows, oxen, and pigs in another part of town. A crowd of townspeople and local farmers jostled for space in the square; Mr. Punch was squeaking in one corner, and a wandering juggler was trying to find room for his show in another, making my last view of Boston more vibrant than my previous ones. Meanwhile, the tower of Saint Botolph's looked down kindly; I imagined it was waving me farewell, just like it did for Mr. Cotton two or three hundred years ago, urging me to describe its ancient height and the town below to the people of the American city, who are somewhat connected, if not to the living residents of Old Boston, at least to some of the dust resting in its churchyard.

One thing more. They have a Bunker Hill in the vicinity of their town; and (what could hardly be expected of an English community) seem proud to think that their neighborhood has given name to our first and most widely celebrated and best remembered battle-field.

One more thing. They have a Bunker Hill near their town; and (what you wouldn’t really expect from an English community) they seem proud to think that their area has named our first, most famous, and best-remembered battlefield.





NEAR OXFORD.

On a fine morning in September we set out on an excursion to Blenheim,— the sculptor and myself being seated on the box of our four-horse carriage, two more of the party in the dicky, and the others less agreeably accommodated inside. We had no coachman, but two postilions in short scarlet jackets and leather breeches with top-boots, each astride of a horse; so that, all the way along, when not otherwise attracted, we had the interesting spectacle of their up-and-down bobbing in the saddle. It was a sunny and beautiful day, a specimen of the perfect English weather, just warm enough for comfort,—indeed, a little too warm, perhaps, in the noontide sun,—yet retaining a mere spice or suspicion of austerity, which made it all the more enjoyable.

On a beautiful September morning, we set off on a trip to Blenheim. The sculptor and I were sitting on the front seat of our four-horse carriage, two others were in the back seat, and the rest of our group was less comfortably packed inside. We didn’t have a coachman, but two postilions in short red jackets and leather pants with tall boots rode on horses. So, throughout the journey, when we weren't focused on something else, we had the entertaining sight of them bobbing up and down in their saddles. It was a sunny, perfect day—a great example of English weather—just warm enough to be pleasant, although maybe a bit too warm in the midday sun, yet it still had a hint of crispness that made it even more enjoyable.

The country between Oxford and Blenheim is not particularly interesting, being almost level, or undulating very slightly; nor is Oxfordshire, agriculturally, a rich part of England. We saw one or two hamlets, and I especially remember a picturesque old gabled house at a turnpike-gate, and, altogether, the wayside scenery had an aspect of old-fashioned English life; but there was nothing very memorable till we reached Woodstock, and stopped to water our horses at the Black Bear. This neighborhood is called New Woodstock, but has by no means the brand-new appearance of an American town, being a large village of stone houses, most of them pretty well time-worn and weather-stained. The Black Bear is an ancient inn, large and respectable, with balustraded staircases, and intricate passages and corridors, and queer old pictures and engravings hanging in the entries and apartments. We ordered a lunch (the most delightful of English institutions, next to dinner) to be ready against our return, and then resumed our drive to Blenheim.

The area between Oxford and Blenheim isn’t particularly interesting, being mostly flat or only gently rolling; nor is Oxfordshire a rich agricultural part of England. We passed a couple of small villages, and I especially remember a charming old gabled house at a tollgate. Overall, the roadside scenery had a vibe of traditional English life, but nothing extremely memorable happened until we got to Woodstock and stopped to water our horses at the Black Bear. This area is called New Woodstock, but it doesn’t have the shiny new look of an American town. It’s a large village with stone houses, most of which are quite weathered. The Black Bear is an old inn, spacious and respectable, featuring balustraded staircases, winding passages and corridors, and quirky old pictures and engravings hanging in the hallways and rooms. We ordered lunch (the most delightful English tradition, right after dinner) to be ready for when we returned, and then continued our drive to Blenheim.

The park-gate of Blenheim stands close to the end of the village street of Woodstock. Immediately on passing through its portals we saw the stately palace in the distance, but made a wide circuit of the park before approaching it. This noble park contains three thousand acres of land, and is fourteen miles in circumference. Having been, in part, a royal domain before it was granted to the Marlborough family, it contains many trees of unsurpassed antiquity, and has doubtless been the haunt of game and deer for centuries. We saw pheasants in abundance, feeding in the open lawns and glades; and the stags tossed their antlers and bounded away, not affrighted, but only shy and gamesome, as we drove by. It is a magnificent pleasure-ground, not too tamely kept, nor rigidly subjected within rule, but vast enough to have lapsed back into nature again, after all the pains that the landscape-gardeners of Queen Anne's time bestowed on it, when the domain of Blenheim was scientifically laid out. The great, knotted, slanting trunks of the old oaks do not now look as if man had much intermeddled with their growth and postures. The trees of later date, that were set out in the Great Duke's time, are arranged on the plan of the order of battle in which the illustrious commander ranked his troops at Blenheim; but the ground covered is so extensive, and the trees now so luxuriant, that the spectator is not disagreeably conscious of their standing in military array, as if Orpheus had summoned them together by beat of drum. The effect must have been very formal a hundred and fifty years ago, but has ceased to be so,—although the trees, I presume, have kept their ranks with even more fidelity than Marlborough's veterans did.

The park gate of Blenheim is located near the end of the village street in Woodstock. As soon as we walked through its entrance, we saw the impressive palace in the distance, but we made a wide circle around the park before getting closer. This grand park spans three thousand acres and is fourteen miles around. Having once been a royal estate before it was given to the Marlborough family, it features many ancient trees and has likely been home to game and deer for centuries. We spotted plenty of pheasants grazing in the open lawns and clearings; the stags lifted their antlers and bounded away, not frightened, but just shy and playful as we passed by. It's a stunning recreation area, not overly manicured nor strictly controlled, but spacious enough to have returned to nature after all the effort that the landscape gardeners from Queen Anne's era put into it when the Blenheim estate was meticulously designed. The large, twisted, leaning trunks of the old oaks don’t appear as if humans have significantly interfered with their growth and shapes. The younger trees, planted during the Great Duke's time, are arranged according to the battle formation in which the famous commander had his troops at Blenheim; however, the area is so vast, and the trees are now so lush, that the observer doesn’t feel the discomfort of their military alignment, as if Orpheus had called them together by drumbeat. The effect must have felt quite formal one hundred and fifty years ago, but it no longer does—even though I imagine the trees have maintained their ranks even more faithfully than Marlborough’s soldiers did.

One of the park-keepers, on horseback, rode beside our carriage, pointing out the choice views, and glimpses at the palace, as we drove through the domain. There is a very large artificial lake (to say the truth, it seemed to me fully worthy of being compared with the Welsh lakes, at least, if not with those of Westmoreland), which was created by Capability Brown, and fills the basin that he scooped for it, just as if Nature had poured these broad waters into one of her own valleys. It is a most beautiful object at a distance, and not less so on its immediate banks; for the water is very pure, being supplied by a small river, of the choicest transparency, which was turned thitherward for the purpose. And Blenheim owes not merely this water-scenery, but almost all its other beauties, to the contrivance of man. Its natural features are not striking; but Art has effected such wonderful things that the uninstructed visitor would never guess that nearly the whole scene was but the embodied thought of a human mind. A skilful painter hardly does more for his blank sheet of canvas than the landscape-gardener, the planter, the arranger of trees, has done for the monotonous surface of Blenheim,—making the most of every undulation,—flinging down a hillock, a big lump of earth out of a giant's hand, wherever it was needed,— putting in beauty as often as there was a niche for it,—opening vistas to every point that deserved to be seen, and throwing a veil of impenetrable foliage around what ought to be hidden;—and then, to be sure, the lapse of a century has softened the harsh outline of man's labors, and has given the place back to Nature again with the addition of what consummate science could achieve.

One of the park keepers, on horseback, rode next to our carriage, pointing out the great views and glimpses of the palace as we drove through the grounds. There's a large artificial lake (honestly, I think it could easily compare to the Welsh lakes, if not those in Westmoreland), created by Capability Brown, which fills the basin he carved out for it, as if Nature had poured these wide waters into one of her own valleys. It's a stunning sight from a distance and just as beautiful up close; the water is crystal clear, supplied by a small river of the clearest transparency, which was redirected for this purpose. Blenheim owes not just this water scenery, but almost all its other beauties to human effort. Its natural features are not impressive; but Art has done such amazing work that an untrained visitor would never guess that nearly the whole scene is just the realization of a human idea. A skilled painter hardly does more for a blank canvas than the landscape gardener, the planter, and the tree arranger have done for the flat surface of Blenheim—maximizing every bump—throwing down a hillock, a big clump of dirt from a giant's hand, wherever it was needed—adding beauty wherever there was a spot for it—opening views to every angle worth seeing, and covering up what should remain hidden with layers of dense foliage; and, of course, a century's passage has softened the harsh outlines of man’s work and has returned the place to Nature, enhanced by the marvels of human science.

After driving a good way, we came to a battlemented tower and adjoining house, which used to be the residence of the Ranger of Woodstock Park, who held charge of the property for the King before the Duke of Marlborough possessed it. The keeper opened the door for us, and in the entrance-hall we found various things that had to do with the chase and woodland sports. We mounted the staircase, through several stories, up to the top of the tower, whence there was a view of the spires of Oxford, and of points much farther off,—very indistinctly seen, however, as is usually the case with the misty distances of England. Returning to the ground-floor, we were ushered into the room in which died Wilmot, the wicked Earl of Rochester, who was Ranger of the Park in Charles II.'s time. It is a low and bare little room, with a window in front, and a smaller one behind; and in the contiguous entrance-room there are the remains of an old bedstead, beneath the canopy of which, perhaps, Rochester may have made the penitent end that Bishop Burnet attributes to him. I hardly know what it is, in this poor fellow's character, which affects us with greater tenderness on his behalf than for all the other profligates of his day, who seem to have been neither better nor worse than himself. I rather suspect that he had a human heart which never quite died out of him, and the warmth of which is still faintly perceptible amid the dissolute trash which he left behind.

After driving a while, we arrived at a fortified tower and a nearby house, which used to be the home of the Ranger of Woodstock Park, who was in charge of the property for the King before the Duke of Marlborough took over. The keeper opened the door for us, and in the entrance hall, we found various items related to hunting and outdoor sports. We climbed the staircase through several floors to the top of the tower, where we could see the spires of Oxford and much farther points, though they were barely visible, as is often the case with England's hazy distances. Back on the ground floor, we were led into the room where Wilmot, the notorious Earl of Rochester, died; he was the Ranger of the Park during Charles II's reign. It's a small, simple room with a window in the front and a smaller one in the back; in the adjoining entrance room, there are remnants of an old bed frame, beneath which Rochester may have had the penitent end that Bishop Burnet credited to him. I can't quite pinpoint what it is about this man’s character that elicits more sympathy for him than for other hedonists of his time, who don't seem to have been any better or worse than he was. I suspect he had a human heart that never fully died within him, the warmth of which is still faintly detectable amid the scandalous remnants he left behind.

Methinks, if such good fortune ever befell a bookish man, I should choose this lodge for my own residence, with the topmost room of the tower for a study, and all the seclusion of cultivated wildness beneath to ramble in. There being no such possibility, we drove on, catching glimpses of the palace in new points of view, and by and by came to Rosamond's Well. The particular tradition that connects Fair Rosamond with it is not now in my memory; but if Rosamond ever lived and loved, and ever had her abode in the maze of Woodstock, it may well be believed that she and Henry sometimes sat beside this spring. It gushes out from a bank, through some old stone-work, and dashes its little cascade (about as abundant as one might turn out of a large pitcher) into a pool, whence it steals away towards the lake, which is not far removed. The water is exceedingly cold, and as pure as the legendary Rosamond was not, and is fancied to possess medicinal virtues, like springs at which saints have quenched their thirst. There were two or three old women and some children in attendance with tumblers, which they present to visitors, full of the consecrated water; but most of us filled the tumblers for ourselves, and drank.

I think that if such good luck ever came to a bookish person, I would choose this lodge as my home, with the top room of the tower as my study, and all the quiet, cultivated wildness below to explore. Since that isn’t possible, we continued on, catching glimpses of the palace from different angles, and eventually arrived at Rosamond's Well. I can’t remember the specific story that links Fair Rosamond to it, but if Rosamond ever lived, loved, and had a place in the maze of Woodstock, it’s easy to imagine she and Henry sometimes sat by this spring. It flows out from a bank through some old stonework and spills its little cascade (about as much as you'd pour from a large pitcher) into a pool, which then flows toward the nearby lake. The water is very cold and as pure as the legendary Rosamond was not, and it's believed to have healing properties, like the springs where saints have quenched their thirst. There were a couple of old women and some children there with glasses, offering visitors the sacred water; but most of us filled our own glasses and drank.

Thence we drove to the Triumphal Pillar which was erected in honor of the Great Duke, and on the summit of which he stands, in a Roman garb, holding a winged figure of Victory in his hand, as an ordinary man might hold a bird. The column is I know not how many feet high, but lofty enough, at any rate, to elevate Marlborough far above the rest of the world, and to be visible a long way off; and it is so placed in reference to other objects, that, wherever the hero wandered about his grounds, and especially as he issued from his mansion, he must inevitably have been reminded of his glory. In truth, until I came to Blenheim, I never had so positive and material an idea of what Fame really is—of what the admiration of his country can do for a successful warrior—as I carry away with me and shall always retain. Unless he had the moral force of a thousand men together, his egotism (beholding himself everywhere, imbuing the entire soil, growing in the woods, rippling and gleaming in the water, and pervading the very air with his greatness) must have been swollen within him like the liver of a Strasburg goose. On the huge tablets inlaid into the pedestal of the column, the entire Act of Parliament, bestowing Blenheim on the Duke of Marlborough and his posterity, is engraved in deep letters, painted black on the marble ground. The pillar stands exactly a mile from the principal front of the palace, in a straight line with the precise centre of its entrance-hall; so that, as already said, it was the Duke's principal object of contemplation.

Then we drove to the Triumphal Pillar, which was built to honor the Great Duke. At the top of the pillar, he stands in Roman attire, holding a winged figure of Victory in one hand, like an everyday person might hold a bird. The column is quite tall—definitely high enough to lift Marlborough far above the rest of the world and to be seen from a distance. It's positioned in such a way in relation to other landmarks that wherever the hero roamed his grounds, especially as he left his mansion, he must have been constantly reminded of his glory. In fact, until I visited Blenheim, I never had such a clear and tangible understanding of what Fame truly means—of what the admiration of one’s country can do for a victorious warrior—as I take away with me and will always remember. Unless he had the moral strength of a thousand men combined, his egotism—seeing himself everywhere, saturating the very soil, flourishing in the woods, sparkling in the water, and filling the air with his greatness—must have swelled within him like the liver of a Strasbourg goose. On the large tablets embedded in the pedestal of the column, the entire Act of Parliament, granting Blenheim to the Duke of Marlborough and his descendants, is engraved in deep letters, painted black on the marble base. The pillar stands exactly a mile from the main front of the palace, perfectly aligned with the center of its entrance hall; so, as mentioned earlier, it was the Duke's main point of focus.

We now proceeded to the palace-gate, which is a great pillared archway, of wonderful loftiness and state, giving admittance into a spacious quadrangle. A stout, elderly, and rather surly footman in livery appeared at the entrance, and took possession of whatever canes, umbrellas, and parasols he could get hold of, in order to claim sixpence on our departure. This had a somewhat ludicrous effect. There is much public outcry against the meanness of the present Duke in his arrangements for the admission of visitors (chiefly, of course, his native countrymen) to view the magnificent palace which their forefathers bestowed upon his own. In many cases, it seems hard that a private abode should be exposed to the intrusion of the public merely because the proprietor has inherited or created a splendor which attracts general curiosity; insomuch that his home loses its sanctity and seclusion for the very reason that it is better than other men's houses. But in the case of Blenheim, the public have certainly an equitable claim to admission, both because the fame of its first inhabitant is a national possession, and because the mansion was a national gift, one of the purposes of which was to be a token of gratitude and glory to the English people themselves. If a man chooses to be illustrious, he is very likely to incur some little inconveniences himself, and entail them on his posterity. Nevertheless, his present Grace of Marlborough absolutely ignores the public claim above suggested, and (with a thrift of which even the hero of Blenheim himself did not set the example) sells tickets admitting six persons at ten shillings; if only one person enters the gate, he must pay for six; and if there are seven in company, two tickets are required to admit them. The attendants, who meet you everywhere in the park and palace, expect fees on their own private account,—their noble master pocketing the ten shillings. But, to be sure, the visitor gets his money's worth, since it buys him the right to speak just as freely of the Duke of Marlborough as if he were the keeper of the Cremorne Gardens.

We now headed to the palace gate, which is a grand, pillared archway, impressively tall and majestic, leading into a spacious courtyard. A robust, older, and somewhat grumpy footman in uniform appeared at the entrance, taking charge of any canes, umbrellas, and parasols he could grab, in order to charge six pence when we left. This created a somewhat ridiculous situation. There is a lot of public outcry against the stinginess of the current Duke regarding how he manages visitor access (mainly, of course, for his fellow countrymen) to see the magnificent palace that their ancestors built for him. In many respects, it feels unfair that a private residence should be subjected to public intrusion simply because the owner has inherited or created a grandeur that sparks general interest; so much so that his home loses its privacy and sanctuary because it’s better than other people’s houses. However, in the case of Blenheim, the public undeniably has a fair claim to entry, both because the legacy of its first resident belongs to the nation, and because the mansion was a national gift, meant to symbolize gratitude and glory for the English people themselves. If a person chooses to be distinguished, they’re likely to encounter some minor inconveniences themselves, which they also pass on to their descendants. Nonetheless, the current Duke of Marlborough completely disregards the public claim mentioned above and (with a stinginess even the hero of Blenheim didn’t exemplify) sells tickets that allow six people to enter for ten shillings; if only one person passes through the gate, they must pay for six; and if there are seven in the group, two tickets are needed for entry. The staff you encounter throughout the park and palace expect tips for their own benefit—while their noble master pockets the ten shillings. But, to be fair, the visitor does get their money's worth since it grants them the right to comment just as freely about the Duke of Marlborough as if he were the keeper of the Cremorne Gardens.

[The above was written two or three years ago, or more; and the Duke of that day has since transmitted his coronet to his successor, who, we understand, has adopted much more liberal arrangements. There is seldom anything to criticise or complain of, as regards the facility of obtaining admission to interesting private houses in England.]

[The above was written two or three years ago, or more; and the Duke of that time has since passed his crown to his successor, who, we understand, has made much more open arrangements. There is hardly ever anything to criticize or complain about when it comes to getting access to interesting private homes in England.]

Passing through a gateway on the opposite side of the quadrangle, we had before us the noble classic front of the palace, with its two projecting wings. We ascended the lofty steps of the portal, and were admitted into the entrance-hall, the height of which, from floor to ceiling, is not much less than seventy feet, being the entire elevation of the edifice. The hall is lighted by windows in the upper story, and, it being a clear, bright day, was very radiant with lofty sunshine, amid which a swallow was flitting to and fro. The ceiling was painted by Sir James Thornhill in some allegorical design (doubtless commemorative of Marlborough's victories), the purport of which I did not take the trouble to make out, —contenting myself with the general effect, which was most splendidly and effectively ornamental.

Passing through a gateway on the other side of the courtyard, we faced the impressive classic facade of the palace, complete with its two jutting wings. We climbed the tall steps of the entrance, which reaches a height of about seventy feet from floor to ceiling, representing the full height of the building. The hall is illuminated by windows in the upper level, and since it was a clear, bright day, it was filled with brilliant sunlight, where a swallow was fluttering around. The ceiling was painted by Sir James Thornhill in some allegorical design (likely celebrating Marlborough's victories), the details of which I didn’t bother to decipher, satisfied with the overall effect, which was both splendid and stunningly decorative.

We were guided through the show-rooms by a very civil person, who allowed us to take pretty much our own time in looking at the pictures. The collection is exceedingly valuable,—many of these works of Art having been presented to the Great Duke by the crowned heads of England or the Continent. One room was all aglow with pictures by Rubens; and there were works of Raphael, and many other famous painters, any one of which would be sufficient to illustrate the meanest house that might contain it. I remember none of then, however (not being in a picture-seeing mood), so well as Vandyck's large and familiar picture of Charles I. on horseback, with a figure and face of melancholy dignity such as never by any other hand was put on canvas. Yet, on considering this face of Charles (which I find often repeated in half-lengths) and translating it from the ideal into literalism, I doubt whether the unfortunate king was really a handsome or impressive-looking man: a high, thin-ridged nose, a meagre, hatchet face, and reddish hair and beard,—these are the literal facts. It is the painter's art that has thrown such pensive and shadowy grace around him.

We were shown around the showrooms by a very polite person, who let us take our time looking at the pictures. The collection is incredibly valuable—many of these artworks were gifted to the Great Duke by the royal heads of England or the Continent. One room was filled with paintings by Rubens; there were also works by Raphael and many other famous artists, any of which would be enough to showcase in the simplest home that might have it. However, I don't remember any of them (not being in the mood to appreciate art) as well as Vandyck's large and well-known painting of Charles I on horseback, which features a face and figure of melancholic dignity that no other artist has captured on canvas. Yet, when I think about Charles's face (which I often see in half-length portraits) and translate it from an idealized version to a literal one, I wonder if the unfortunate king was truly a handsome or impressive-looking man: a high, thin nose, a gaunt face, and reddish hair and beard—these are the actual details. It is the artist's skill that has created such a pensive and shadowy elegance around him.

On our passage through this beautiful suite of apartments, we saw, through the vista of open doorways, a boy of ten or twelve years old coming towards us from the farther rooms. He had on a straw hat, a linen sack that had certainly been washed and re-washed for a summer or two, and gray trousers a good deal worn,—a dress, in short, which an American mother in middle station would have thought too shabby for her darling school-boy's ordinary wear. This urchin's face was rather pale (as those of English children are apt to be, quite as often as our own), but he had pleasant eyes, an intelligent look, and an agreeable, boyish manner. It was Lord Sunderland, grandson of the present Duke, and heir—though not, I think, in the direct line—of the blood of the great Marlborough, and of the title and estate.

On our way through this beautiful set of rooms, we noticed a boy around ten or twelve years old coming towards us from the back rooms. He was wearing a straw hat, a linen bag that had clearly been washed multiple times over the past couple of summers, and some well-worn gray trousers—a getup that an American mother in a middle-class setting would likely deem too shabby for her precious schoolboy's everyday wear. This kid's face was somewhat pale (as English children often are, just like our own), but he had friendly eyes, a smart look, and a likable, youthful demeanor. It was Lord Sunderland, the grandson of the current Duke, and heir—though not in the direct line, I think—to the lineage of the great Marlborough, as well as to the title and estate.

After passing through the first suite of rooms, we were conducted through a corresponding suite on the opposite side of the entrance-hall. These latter apartments are most richly adorned with tapestries, wrought and presented to the first Duke by a sisterhood of Flemish nuns; they look like great, glowing pictures, and completely cover the walls of the rooms. The designs purport to represent the Duke's battles and sieges; and everywhere we see the hero himself, as large as life, and as gorgeous in scarlet and gold as the holy sisters could make him, with a three-cornered hat and flowing wig, reining in his horse, and extending his leading-staff in the attitude of command. Next to Marlborough, Prince Eugene is the most prominent figure. In the way of upholstery, there can never have been anything more magnificent than these tapestries; and, considered as works of Art, they have quite as much merit as nine pictures out of ten.

After going through the first set of rooms, we were taken through a corresponding set on the opposite side of the entrance hall. These rooms are beautifully decorated with tapestries that were made and given to the first Duke by a group of Flemish nuns; they look like large, vibrant pictures and completely cover the walls. The designs are meant to depict the Duke's battles and sieges, and everywhere you see the hero himself, life-sized and as splendid in scarlet and gold as the holy sisters could make him, with a three-cornered hat and a flowing wig, holding his horse and extending his leading staff in a commanding gesture. Next to Marlborough, Prince Eugene is the most notable figure. In terms of upholstery, there has never been anything more magnificent than these tapestries; and as works of art, they are just as impressive as nine out of ten paintings.

One whole wing of the palace is occupied by the library, a most noble room, with a vast perspective length from end to end. Its atmosphere is brighter and more cheerful than that of most libraries: a wonderful contrast to the old college-libraries of Oxford, and perhaps less sombre and suggestive of thoughtfulness than any large library ought to be, inasmuch as so many studious brains as have left their deposit on the shelves cannot have conspired without producing a very serious and ponderous result. Both walls and ceiling are white, and there are elaborate doorways and fireplaces of white marble. The floor is of oak, so highly polished that our feet slipped upon it as if it had been New England ice. At one end of the room stands a statue of Queen Anne in her royal robes, which are so admirably designed and exquisitely wrought that the spectator certainly gets a strong conception of her royal dignity; while the face of the statue, fleshy and feeble, doubtless conveys a suitable idea of her personal character. The marble of this work, long as it has stood there, is as white as snow just fallen, and must have required most faithful and religious care to keep it so. As for the volumes of the library, they are wired within the cases and turn their gilded backs upon the visitor, keeping their treasures of wit and wisdom just as intangible as if still in the unwrought mines of human thought.

One entire wing of the palace is taken up by the library, a truly magnificent room, stretching out impressively from one end to the other. Its atmosphere is brighter and more inviting than that of most libraries: a wonderful change from the old college libraries of Oxford, and perhaps less serious and contemplative than any large library should be, since so many studious minds have left their mark on the shelves, surely creating a very serious and weighty outcome. Both the walls and ceiling are white, and there are intricate doorways and fireplaces made of white marble. The floor is made of oak, so highly polished that our feet slipped on it as if it were ice in New England. At one end of the room, there’s a statue of Queen Anne in her royal robes, which are so beautifully designed and intricately crafted that anyone looking at it surely gets a strong sense of her royal dignity; meanwhile, the statue’s face, soft and weak, probably gives a fitting impression of her personal character. The marble of this statue, despite how long it has stood there, is as white as freshly fallen snow and must have required diligent and careful maintenance to keep it that way. As for the books in the library, they are secured within their cases, turning their gilded spines away from the viewer, keeping their treasures of knowledge and insight just as elusive as if they were still buried in the raw mines of human thought.

I remember nothing else in the palace, except the chapel, to which we were conducted last, and where we saw a splendid monument to the first Duke and Duchess, sculptured by Rysbrack, at the cost, it is said, of forty thousand pounds. The design includes the statues of the deceased dignitaries, and various allegorical flourishes, fantasies, and confusions; and beneath sleep the great Duke and his proud wife, their veritable bones and dust, and probably all the Marlboroughs that have since died. It is not quite a comfortable idea, that these mouldy ancestors still inhabit, after their fashion, the house where their successors spend the passing day; but the adulation lavished upon the hero of Blenheim could not have been consummated, unless the palace of his lifetime had become likewise a stately mausoleum over his remains,— and such we felt it all to be, after gazing at his tomb.

I don't remember much else in the palace, except the chapel, where we were taken last, and where we saw an impressive monument to the first Duke and Duchess, sculpted by Rysbrack, estimated to have cost forty thousand pounds. The design features statues of the deceased dignitaries, along with various allegorical elements, fantasies, and mix-ups; and beneath rest the great Duke and his proud wife, their actual bones and dust, along with probably all the Marlboroughs who have passed away since. It's not a very comforting thought that these decayed ancestors still sort of inhabit the place where their descendants spend their days; but the tribute given to the hero of Blenheim couldn't have been truly complete unless the palace of his lifetime had also become a grand mausoleum over his remains,— and that’s how we felt after looking at his tomb.

The next business was to see the private gardens. An old Scotch under-gardener admitted us and led the way, and seemed to have a fair prospect of earning the fee all by himself; but by and by another respectable Scotchman made his appearance and took us in charge, proving to be the head-gardener in person. He was extremely intelligent and agreeable, talking both scientifically and lovingly about trees and plants, of which there is every variety capable of English cultivation. Positively, the Garden of Eden cannot have been more beautiful than this private garden of Blenheim. It contains three hundred acres, and by the artful circumlocution of the paths, and the undulations, and the skilfully interposed clumps of trees, is made to appear limitless. The sylvan delights of a whole country are compressed into this space, as whole fields of Persian roses go to the concoction of an ounce of precious attar. The world within that garden-fence is not the same weary and dusty world with which we outside mortals are conversant; it is a finer, lovelier, more harmonious Nature; and the Great Mother lends herself kindly to the gardener's will, knowing that he will make evident the half-obliterated traits of her pristine and ideal beauty, and allow her to take all the credit and praise to herself. I doubt whether there is ever any winter within that precinct,—any clouds, except the fleecy ones of summer. The sunshine that I saw there rests upon my recollection of it as if it were eternal. The lawns and glades are like the memory of places where one has wandered when first in love.

The next thing we did was visit the private gardens. An old Scottish under-gardener welcomed us and showed us around, likely thinking he could earn the entire fee himself. After a while, another respectable Scottish man joined us; he turned out to be the head gardener. He was very knowledgeable and friendly, discussing trees and plants, of which there are every variety that can thrive in England. Honestly, the Garden of Eden couldn’t have been more beautiful than this private garden at Blenheim. It covers three hundred acres and, thanks to the clever layout of the paths, the rolling hills, and the skillfully placed clusters of trees, it seems endless. The lush beauty of an entire countryside is packed into this space, much like how whole fields of Persian roses are used to create just an ounce of precious attar. The world inside that garden fence is not the same weary and dusty world we outsiders know; it’s a more refined, lovely, and harmonious nature. The Great Mother allows the gardener to shape her remaining traits of original beauty, knowing he will reveal them and let her take all the credit and praise. I doubt there’s ever a winter in that area—only the fluffy clouds of summer. The sunshine I experienced there feels like a permanent memory. The lawns and glades remind me of places one wanders when they first fall in love.

What a good and happy life might be spent in a paradise like this! And yet, at that very moment, the besotted Duke (ah! I have let out a secret which I meant to keep to myself; but the ten shillings must pay for all) was in that very garden (for the guide told us so, and cautioned our young people not to be too uproarious), and, if in a condition for arithmetic, was thinking of nothing nobler than how many ten-shilling tickets had that day been sold. Republican as I am, I should still love to think that noblemen lead noble lives, and that all this stately and beautiful environment may serve to elevate them a little way above the rest of us. If it fail to do so, the disgrace falls equally upon the whole race of mortals as on themselves; because it proves that no more favorable conditions of existence would eradicate our vices and weaknesses. How sad, if this be so! Even a herd of swine, eating the acorns under those magnificent oaks of Blenheim, would be cleanlier and of better habits than ordinary swine.

What a good and happy life could be spent in a paradise like this! And yet, at that very moment, the clueless Duke (ah! I've let slip a secret I meant to keep; but the ten shillings must cover everything) was in that very garden (the guide told us that and warned our young folks not to be too rowdy), and, if he was capable of any math, was only thinking about how many ten-shilling tickets had been sold that day. Even though I'm a Republican, I still like to think that noblemen live noble lives, and that this grand and beautiful surroundings might lift them a bit above the rest of us. If it doesn't, the shame falls equally on all of humanity as much as on them; because it shows that even the best conditions wouldn't eliminate our flaws and weaknesses. How sad if that’s the case! Even a herd of pigs, eating the acorns under those magnificent oaks of Blenheim, would be cleaner and have better habits than ordinary pigs.

Well, all that I have written is pitifully meagre, as a description of Blenheim; and I bate to leave it without some more adequate expression of the noble edifice, with its rich domain, all as I saw them in that beautiful sunshine; for, if a day had been chosen out of a hundred years, it could not have been a finer one. But I must give up the attempt; only further remarking that the finest trees here were cedars, of which I saw one—and there may have been many such—immense in girth, and not less than three centuries old. I likewise saw a vast heap of laurel, two hundred feet in circumference, all growing from one root; and the gardener offered to show us another growth of twice that stupendous size. If the Great Duke himself had been buried in that spot, his heroic heart could not have been the seed of a more plentiful crop of laurels.

Well, everything I’ve written so far is sadly lacking as a description of Blenheim, and I hate to leave it without a better expression of the grand building and its lush grounds, all as I saw them in that beautiful sunlight. If a day had to be picked out of a hundred years, it couldn’t have been nicer. But I have to give up the effort; I just want to add that the most impressive trees here were cedars. I saw one that was huge in girth and at least three hundred years old, and there might have been many others like it. I also saw a massive laurel that measured two hundred feet around, all growing from a single root; the gardener even offered to show us another one that was twice that size. If the Great Duke had been buried in that spot, his heroic heart couldn’t have produced a richer harvest of laurels.

We now went back to the Black Bear, and sat down to a cold collation, of which we ate abundantly, and drank (in the good old English fashion) a due proportion of various delightful liquors. A stranger in England, in his rambles to various quarters of the country, may learn little in regard to wines (for the ordinary English taste is simple, though sound, in that particular), but he makes acquaintance with more varieties of hop and malt liquor than he previously supposed to exist. I remember a sort of foaming stuff, called hop-champagne, which is very vivacious, and appears to be a hybrid between ale and bottled cider. Another excellent tipple for warm weather is concocted by mixing brown-stout or bitter ale with ginger-beer, the foam of which stirs up the heavier liquor from its depths, forming a compound of singular vivacity and sufficient body. But of all things ever brewed from malt (unless it be the Trinity Ale of Cambridge, which I drank long afterwards, and which Barry Cornwall has celebrated in immortal verse), commend me to the Archdeacon, as the Oxford scholars call it, in honor of the jovial dignitary who first taught these erudite worthies how to brew their favorite nectar. John Barleycorn has given his very heart to this admirable liquor; it is a superior kind of ale, the Prince of Ales, with a richer flavor and a mightier spirit than you can find elsewhere in this weary world. Much have we been strengthened and encouraged by the potent blood of the Archdeacon!

We headed back to the Black Bear and sat down for a light meal, eating plenty and drinking (in the good old English way) a nice variety of tasty drinks. A visitor to England, while exploring different parts of the country, may not learn much about wines (since the average English palate is pretty straightforward, though reliable in that area), but they'll discover more kinds of beer and ale than they ever thought existed. I remember trying a bubbly drink called hop-champagne, which is very lively and seems to be a mix of ale and bottled cider. Another great drink for warm weather combines brown stout or bitter ale with ginger beer; the foam brings the denser liquor to the top, creating a lively and substantial mix. But of all the brews made from malt (except for the Trinity Ale of Cambridge, which I enjoyed much later and which Barry Cornwall has praised in timeless verse), I prefer the Archdeacon, as the Oxford scholars refer to it, named after the cheerful official who first taught these learned folks how to brew their favorite drink. John Barleycorn has really put his heart into this wonderful beverage; it's a superior type of ale, the Prince of Ales, with a richer taste and stronger kick than you can find anywhere else in this weary world. We've gained a lot of strength and encouragement from the powerful essence of the Archdeacon!

A few days after our excursion to Blenheim, the same party set forth, in two flies, on a tour to some other places of interest in the neighborhood of Oxford. It was again a delightful day; and, in truth, every day, of late, had been so pleasant that it seemed as if each must be the very last of such perfect weather; and yet the long succession had given us confidence in as many more to come. The climate of England has been shamefully maligned, its sulkiness and asperities are not nearly so offensive as Englishmen tell us (their climate being the only attribute of their country which they never overvalue); and the really good summer-weather is the very kindest and sweetest that the world knows.

A few days after our trip to Blenheim, the same group set out in two carriages on a tour to explore other interesting spots around Oxford. It was another beautiful day; in fact, every day recently had been so lovely that it felt like each one might be the absolute last of such perfect weather. Yet, the consistent streak had given us confidence that even more nice days were ahead. England's climate has been unfairly criticized; its gloominess and harshness aren't nearly as bad as English people claim (their climate being the only aspect of their country they never exaggerate); and the truly nice summer weather is the kindest and sweetest in the world.

We first drove to the village of Cumnor, about six miles from Oxford, and alighted at the entrance of the church. Here, while waiting for the keys, we looked at an old wall of the churchyard, piled up of loose gray stones which are said to have once formed a portion of Cumnor Hall, celebrated in Mickle's ballad and Scott's romance. The hall must have been in very close vicinity to the church,—not more than twenty yards off; and I waded through the long, dewy grass of the churchyard, and tried to peep over the wall, in hopes to discover some tangible and traceable remains of the edifice. But the wall was just too high to be overlooked, and difficult to clamber over without tumbling down some of the stones; so I took the word of one of our party, who had been here before, that there is nothing interesting on the other side. The churchyard is in rather a neglected state, and seems not to have been mown for the benefit of the parson's cow; it contains a good many gravestones, of which I remember only some upright memorials of slate to individuals of the name of Tabbs.

We first drove to the village of Cumnor, about six miles from Oxford, and got out at the entrance of the church. While waiting for the keys, we looked at an old wall in the churchyard, made of loose gray stones that are said to have once been part of Cumnor Hall, famous in Mickle's ballad and Scott's romance. The hall must have been very close to the church—no more than twenty yards away. I walked through the long, dewy grass of the churchyard and tried to peek over the wall, hoping to find some tangible remnants of the building. But the wall was just too high to see over, and it was hard to climb without knocking down some of the stones. So, I took the word of someone in our group who had been here before that there’s nothing interesting on the other side. The churchyard is in pretty rough shape and seems like it hasn't been mowed for the parson's cow; it has quite a few gravestones, of which I only remember some upright slate memorials for people with the last name Tabbs.

Soon a woman arrived with the key of the church-door, and we entered the simple old edifice, which has the pavement of lettered tombstones, the sturdy pillars and low arches and other ordinary characteristics of an English country church. One or two pews, probably those of the gentlefolk of the neighborhood, were better furnished than the rest, but all in a modest style. Near the high altar, in the holiest place, there is an oblong, angular, ponderous tomb of blue marble, built against the wall, and surmounted by a carved canopy of the same material; and over the tomb, and beneath the canopy, are two monumental brasses, such as we oftener see inlaid into a church pavement. On these brasses are engraved the figures of a gentleman in armor and a lady in an antique garb, each about a foot high, devoutly kneeling in prayer; and there is a long Latin inscription likewise cut into the enduring brass, bestowing the highest eulogies on the character of Anthony Forster, who, with his virtuous dame, lies buried beneath this tombstone. His is the knightly figure that kneels above; and if Sir Walter Scott ever saw this tomb, he must have had an even greater than common disbelief in laudatory epitaphs, to venture on depicting Anthony Forster in such lines as blacken him in the romance. For my part, I read the inscription in full faith, and believe the poor deceased gentleman to be a much-wronged individual, with good grounds for bringing an action of slander in the courts above.

Soon, a woman arrived with the key to the church door, and we entered the simple old building, which has a floor made of engraved tombstones, sturdy pillars, low arches, and other typical features of an English country church. One or two pews, probably belonging to the local gentry, were better furnished than the others, but still modest. Near the main altar, in the holiest area, there is a large, angular, heavy tomb made of blue marble, built against the wall and topped with a carved canopy of the same material. Above the tomb, beneath the canopy, are two monumental brass plaques, like those we more often see embedded in church floors. These plaques are engraved with the images of a gentleman in armor and a lady in an old-fashioned dress, each about a foot tall, kneeling in prayer. There is also a long Latin inscription etched into the enduring brass, praising the character of Anthony Forster, who, along with his virtuous wife, is buried beneath this tombstone. His is the knightly figure kneeling above; and if Sir Walter Scott ever saw this tomb, he must have had an even greater than usual skepticism about flattering epitaphs to dare to portray Anthony Forster in such a way that makes him appear villainous in the romance. As for me, I read the inscription in full faith and believe the poor deceased gentleman is greatly wronged, with good reason to bring a slander case in the courts above.

But the circumstance, lightly as we treat it, has its serious moral. What nonsense it is, this anxiety, which so worries us, about our good fame, or our bad fame, after death! If it were of the slightest real moment, our reputations would have been placed by Providence more in our own power, and less in other people's, than we now find them to be. If poor Anthony Forster happens to have met Sir Walter in the other world, I doubt whether he has ever thought it worth while to complain of the latter's misrepresentations.

But even if we take it lightly, this situation has a serious lesson. It's ridiculous, this worry we have about our reputation, whether good or bad, after we die! If it truly mattered, our reputations would have been under our control, rather than left up to others, as we see is the case now. If poor Anthony Forster has run into Sir Walter in the afterlife, I seriously doubt he's bothered to complain about the latter's misrepresentations.

We did not remain long in the church, as it contains nothing else of interest; and driving through the village, we passed a pretty large and rather antique-looking inn, bearing the sign of the Bear and Ragged Staff. It could not be so old, however, by at least a hundred years, as Giles Gosling's time; nor is there any other object to remind the visitor of the Elizabethan age, unless it be a few ancient cottages, that are perhaps of still earlier date. Cumnor is not nearly so large a village, nor a place of such mark, as one anticipates from its romantic and legendary fame; but, being still inaccessible by railway, it has retained more of a sylvan character than we often find in English country towns. In this retired neighborhood the road is narrow and bordered with grass, and sometimes interrupted by gates; the hedges grow in unpruned luxuriance; there is not that close-shaven neatness and trimness that characterize the ordinary English landscape. The whole scene conveys the idea of seclusion and remoteness. We met no travellers, whether on foot or otherwise.

We didn't stay long in the church since it had nothing else of interest. As we drove through the village, we passed a pretty large and somewhat old-looking inn called the Bear and Ragged Staff. However, it couldn’t be more than a hundred years old from Giles Gosling’s time, and there’s nothing else to remind visitors of the Elizabethan era, except for a few ancient cottages that might be even older. Cumnor isn't nearly as big or significant a village as one might expect from its romantic and legendary reputation; however, since it’s still not accessible by train, it has kept more of a rural feel than we often see in English towns. In this quiet area, the road is narrow and lined with grass, and sometimes interrupted by gates; the hedges grow wildly, and there’s none of the tidy neatness that usually defines the English landscape. The entire scene gives off a sense of seclusion and remoteness. We didn’t encounter any travelers, whether on foot or otherwise.

I cannot very distinctly trace out this day's peregrinations; but, after leaving Cumnor a few miles behind us, I think we came to a ferry over the Thames, where an old woman served as ferryman, and pulled a boat across by means of a rope stretching from shore to shore. Our two vehicles being thus placed on the other side, we resumed our drive,—first glancing, however, at the old woman's antique cottage, with its stone floor, and the circular settle round the kitchen fireplace, which was quite in the mediaeval English style.

I can't clearly remember everything from today’s journey; but after we left Cumnor a few miles behind, I think we arrived at a ferry on the Thames, where an old woman operated the ferry and pulled a boat across using a rope that stretched from one shore to the other. Once our two vehicles were on the other side, we continued our drive, but not before taking a look at the woman's old cottage, with its stone floor and the circular bench around the kitchen fireplace, which was very much in the medieval English style.

We next stopped at Stanton Harcourt, where we were received at the parsonage with a hospitality which we should take delight in describing, if it were allowable to make public acknowledgment of the private and personal kindnesses which we never failed to find ready for our needs. An American in an English house will soon adopt the opinion that the English are the very kindest people on earth, and will retain that idea as long, at least, as he remains on the inner side of the threshold. Their magnetism is of a kind that repels strongly while you keep beyond a certain limit, but attracts as forcibly if you get within the magic line.

We next stopped at Stanton Harcourt, where we were welcomed at the parsonage with a warmth that we would love to describe, if it were acceptable to publicly acknowledge the personal kindnesses we always found ready for our needs. An American in an English home will quickly come to believe that the English are the kindest people on earth, and will hold onto that idea at least as long as he stays inside the door. Their charm has a way of pushing you away if you’re outside a certain boundary, but pulls you in strongly as soon as you step over that magical line.

It was at this place, if I remember right, that I heard a gentleman ask a friend of mine whether he was the author of "The Red Letter A"; and, after some consideration (for he did not seem to recognize his own book, at first, under this improved title), our countryman responded, doubtfully, that he believed so. The gentleman proceeded to inquire whether our friend had spent much time in America,—evidently thinking that he must have been caught young, and have had a tincture of English breeding, at least, if not birth, to speak the language so tolerably, and appear so much like other people. This insular narrowness is exceedingly queer, and of very frequent occurrence, and is quite as much a characteristic of men of education and culture as of clowns.

It was in this place, if I remember correctly, that I heard a guy ask a friend of mine if he was the author of "The Red Letter A"; and after a moment of thought (since he didn’t seem to recognize his own book at first under this new title), my friend replied, somewhat uncertainly, that he thought he was. The guy then asked if our friend had spent a lot of time in America—clearly thinking he must have been raised young and had at least some influence of English upbringing, if not born there, to speak the language so well and fit in with everyone else. This kind of narrow-mindedness is really strange and happens quite often, and it’s just as much a trait of educated and cultured people as it is of unrefined folks.

Stanton Harcourt is a very curious old place. It was formerly the seat of the ancient family of Harcourt, which now has its principal abode at Nuneham Courtney, a few miles off. The parsonage is a relic of the family mansion, or castle, other portions of which are close at hand; for, across the garden, rise two gray towers, both of them picturesquely venerable, and interesting for more than their antiquity. One of these towers, in its entire capacity, from height to depth, constituted the kitchen of the ancient castle, and is still used for domestic purposes, although it has not, nor ever had, a chimney; or we might rather say, it is itself one vast chimney, with a hearth of thirty feet square, and a flue and aperture of the same size. There are two huge fireplaces within, and the interior walls of the tower are blackened with the smoke that for centuries used to gush forth from them, and climb upward, seeking an exit through some wide air-holes in the comical roof, full seventy feet above. These lofty openings were capable of being so arranged, with reference to the wind, that the cooks are said to have been seldom troubled by the smoke; and here, no doubt, they were accustomed to roast oxen whole, with as little fuss and ado as a modern cook would roast a fowl. The inside of the tower is very dim and sombre (being nothing but rough stone walls, lighted only from the apertures above mentioned), and has still a pungent odor of smoke and soot, the reminiscence of the fires and feasts of generations that have passed away. Methinks the extremest range of domestic economy lies between an American cooking-stove and the ancient kitchen, seventy dizzy feet in height and all one fireplace, of Stanton Harcourt.

Stanton Harcourt is a very interesting old place. It used to be the home of the ancient Harcourt family, which now primarily resides in Nuneham Courtney, just a few miles away. The parsonage is a remnant of the family mansion, or castle, parts of which are nearby; across the garden, there are two gray towers, both charmingly old and interesting for more than just their age. One of these towers, entirely from top to bottom, served as the kitchen of the old castle and is still used for cooking today, even though it has never had a chimney; we could say it is one giant chimney itself, with a hearth thirty feet square and an opening of the same size. There are two massive fireplaces inside, and the interior walls of the tower are blackened with smoke that has poured out of them for centuries, climbing up to escape through some wide air holes in the quirky roof, which is over seventy feet high. These tall openings could be adjusted based on the wind, so it’s said that the cooks weren’t often bothered by smoke; and here, without much fuss, they likely roasted whole oxen just as easily as a modern cook roasts a chicken. The inside of the tower is quite dim and gloomy (just rough stone walls, lit only by the openings mentioned above), and it still holds a strong smell of smoke and soot, a reminder of the fires and feasts from generations gone by. I think the extreme ends of domestic cooking range from an American stove to the ancient kitchen at Stanton Harcourt, which is seventy dizzy feet high and all one big fireplace.

Now—the place being without a parallel in England, and therefore necessarily beyond the experience of an American—it is somewhat remarkable, that, while we stood gazing at this kitchen, I was haunted and perplexed by an idea that somewhere or other I had seen just this strange spectacle before.—The height, the blackness, the dismal void, before my eyes, seemed as familiar as the decorous neatness of my grandmother's kitchen; only my unaccountable memory of the scene was lighted up with an image of lurid fires blazing all round the dim interior circuit of the tower. I had never before had so pertinacious an attack, as I could not but suppose it, of that odd state of mind wherein we fitfully and teasingly remember some previous scene or incident, of which the one now passing appears to be but the echo and reduplication. Though the explanation of the mystery did not for some time occur to me, I may as well conclude the matter here. In a letter of Pope's, addressed to the Duke of Buckingham, there is an account of Stanton Harcourt (as I now find, although the name is not mentioned), where he resided while translating a part of the "Iliad." It is one of the most admirable pieces of description in the language,—playful and picturesque, with fine touches of humorous pathos,—and conveys as perfect a picture as ever was drawn of a decayed English country-house; and among other rooms, most of which have since crumbled down and disappeared, he dashes off the grim aspect of this kitchen,—which, moreover, he peoples with witches, engaging Satan himself as headcook, who stirs the infernal caldrons that seethe and bubble over the fires. This letter, and others relative to his abode here, were very familiar to my earlier reading, and, remaining still fresh at the bottom of my memory, caused the weird and ghostly sensation that came over one on beholding the real spectacle that had formerly been made so vivid to my imagination.

Now—the place being unlike anything else in England, and so definitely beyond what an American might have experienced—it’s kind of striking that, while we were staring at this kitchen, I was haunted and confused by the thought that I had seen this exact strange sight somewhere before. The height, the darkness, the bleak emptiness in front of me felt as familiar as the tidy neatness of my grandmother's kitchen; only my inexplicable memory of the scene was lit up by images of fierce fires blazing all around the dim interior of the tower. I had never experienced such a persistent feeling, as I couldn’t help but assume, of that odd state of mind where we catch fleeting and teasing glimpses of a previous scene or event, which the current one seems to echo and replicate. Though the explanation for the mystery didn’t come to me for a while, I might as well wrap up the matter here. In a letter from Pope to the Duke of Buckingham, there’s a description of Stanton Harcourt (as I’ve recently discovered, though the name isn’t mentioned), where he lived while translating part of the "Iliad." It’s one of the most wonderful pieces of description in the language—playful and vivid, with delightful touches of humorous pathos—and provides as perfect a picture as has ever been illustrated of a decayed English country house; among other rooms, most of which have since fallen apart and vanished, he captures the grim appearance of this kitchen—which he also fills with witches, having Satan himself as the head cook, stirring the hellish cauldrons that bubble and boil over the fires. This letter, along with others about his time there, was something I was very familiar with from my earlier readings, and still fresh in my memory, it caused the eerie and ghostly feeling that washed over me when I saw the real scene that had once been made so vivid in my imagination.

Our next visit was to the church which stands close by, and is quite as ancient as the remnants of the castle. In a chapel or side-aisle, dedicated to the Harcourts, are found some very interesting family monuments,—and among them, recumbent on a tombstone, the figure of an armed knight of the Lancastrian party, who was slain in the Wars of the Roses. His features, dress, and armor are painted in colors, still wonderfully fresh, and there still blushes the symbol of the Red Rose, denoting the faction for which he fought and died. His head rests on a marble or alabaster helmet; and on the tomb lies the veritable helmet, it is to be presumed, which he wore in battle,—a ponderous iron ease, with the visor complete, and remnants of the gilding that once covered it. The crest is a large peacock, not of metal, but of wood.

Our next stop was the church nearby, which is just as old as the ruins of the castle. In a chapel or side-aisle dedicated to the Harcourts, there are some really interesting family monuments, including a recumbent figure of an armed knight from the Lancastrian side who was killed in the Wars of the Roses. His features, clothing, and armor are painted in colors that are still surprisingly vibrant, and the symbol of the Red Rose is still visible, representing the faction he fought for and died with. His head rests on a marble or alabaster helmet, and on the tomb lies what is likely the actual helmet he wore in battle—a heavy iron piece, complete with a visor, showing remnants of the gold leaf that once adorned it. The crest is a large peacock, made of wood, not metal.

Very possibly, this helmet was but an heraldic adornment of his tomb; and, indeed, it seems strange that it has not been stolen before now, especially in Cromwell's time, when knightly tombs were little respected, and when armor was in request. However, it is needless to dispute with the dead knight about the identity of his iron pot, and we may as well allow it to be the very same that so often gave him the headache in his lifetime. Leaning against the wall, at the foot of the tomb, is the shaft of a spear, with a wofully tattered and utterly faded banner appended to it,—the knightly banner beneath which he marshalled his followers in the field. As it was absolutely falling to pieces, I tore off one little bit, no bigger than a finger-nail, and put it into my waistcoat-pocket; but seeking it subsequently, it was not to be found.

This helmet was likely just a decorative piece for his tomb; it’s surprising it hasn’t been stolen by now, especially during Cromwell's time when knightly tombs were often neglected, and armor was in demand. However, there’s no point in arguing with the deceased knight about what his helmet is, and we might as well accept that it’s the same one that frequently gave him headaches while he was alive. Leaning against the wall at the foot of the tomb is a spear shaft, with a pitifully tattered and completely faded banner attached to it—the knightly banner under which he led his men in battle. Since it was practically in ruins, I ripped off a small piece, no bigger than a fingernail, and tucked it into my waistcoat pocket; but when I looked for it later, it was gone.

On the opposite side of the little chapel, two or three yards from this tomb, is another monument, on which lie, side by side, one of the same knightly race of Harcourts, and his lady. The tradition of the family is, that this knight was the standard-bearer of Henry of Richmond in the Battle of Bosworth Field; and a banner, supposed to be the same that he carried, now droops over his effigy. It is just such a colorless silk rag as the one already described. The knight has the order of the Garter on his knee, and the lady wears it on her left arm, an odd place enough for a garter; but, if worn in its proper locality, it could not be decorously visible. The complete preservation and good condition of these statues, even to the minutest adornment of the sculpture, and their very noses,—the most vulnerable part of a marble man, as of a living one,—are miraculous. Except in Westminster Abbey, among the chapels of the kings, I have seen none so well preserved. Perhaps they owe it to the loyalty of Oxfordshire, diffused throughout its neighborhood by the influence of the University, during the great Civil War and the rule of the Parliament. It speaks well, too, for the upright and kindly character of this old family, that the peasantry, among whom they had lived for ages, did not desecrate their tombs, when it might have been done with impunity.

On the other side of the small chapel, just a few yards from this tomb, is another monument where one knight from the Harcourt family lies beside his lady. Family legend says that this knight was the standard-bearer for Henry of Richmond during the Battle of Bosworth Field, and a banner, believed to be the same one he carried, now hangs over his statue. It’s just like the colorless silk rag described earlier. The knight has the Order of the Garter on his knee, while the lady displays it on her left arm, which is a strange place for a garter; if it were worn in the usual spot, it wouldn’t be appropriately visible. The fact that these statues are so well-preserved, down to the tiniest details of the sculpture, including their noses—the most delicate part of a marble figure, just like a living person—is remarkable. Aside from Westminster Abbey, where the kings’ chapels are, I haven’t seen any others in such good condition. Perhaps this is thanks to the loyalty of Oxfordshire, fostered throughout the area by the University during the Civil War and the Parliament’s rule. It also reflects positively on the honorable and kind nature of this old family that the local people, who had lived alongside them for generations, did not vandalize their tombs when they easily could have.

There are other and more recent memorials of the Harcourts, one of which is the tomb of the last lord, who died about a hundred years ago. His figure, like those of his ancestors, lies on the top of his tomb, clad, not in armor, but in his robes as a peer. The title is now extinct, but the family survives in a younger branch, and still holds this patrimonial estate, though they have long since quitted it as a residence.

There are other, more recent memorials for the Harcourts, one of which is the tomb of the last lord, who passed away about a hundred years ago. His figure, like those of his ancestors, rests on top of his tomb, dressed not in armor, but in his robes as a peer. The title has since become extinct, but the family continues through a younger branch and still owns this ancestral estate, even though they have long since moved away from living there.

We next went to see the ancient fish-ponds appertaining to the mansion, and which used to be of vast dietary importance to the family in Catholic times, and when fish was not otherwise attainable. There are two or three, or more, of these reservoirs, one of which is of very respectable size,—large enough, indeed, to be really a picturesque object, with its grass-green borders, and the trees drooping over it, and the towers of the castle and the church reflected within the weed-grown depths of its smooth mirror. A sweet fragrance, as it were, of ancient time and present quiet and seclusion was breathing all around; the sunshine of to-day had a mellow charm of antiquity in its brightness. These ponds are said still to breed abundance of such fish as love deep and quiet waters; but I saw only some minnows, and one or two snakes, which were lying among the weeds on the top of the water, sunning and bathing themselves at once.

We then went to check out the old fish ponds belonging to the mansion, which used to be really important for the family's diet during the Catholic era when fish was hard to get. There are two or three of these ponds, and one of them is quite large—big enough to be a beautiful sight, with its lush green edges and the trees hanging over it, along with the castle and church towers reflected in the weedy depths of its calm surface. A sweet scent of history and current tranquility filled the air; today's sunlight had a warm, antique charm to it. These ponds are said to still host plenty of fish that prefer deep and peaceful waters, but I only spotted a few minnows and a couple of snakes lounging among the weeds on the water's surface, soaking up the sun.

I mentioned that there were two towers remaining of the old castle: the one containing the kitchen we have already visited; the other, still more interesting, is next to be described. It is some seventy feet high, gray and reverend, but in excellent repair, though I could not perceive that anything had been done to renovate it. The basement story was once the family chapel, and is, of course, still a consecrated spot. At one corner of the tower is a circular turret, within which a narrow staircase, with worn steps of stone, winds round and round as it climbs upward, giving access to a chamber on each floor, and finally emerging on the battlemented roof. Ascending this turret-stair, and arriving at the third story, we entered a chamber, not large, though occupying the whole area of the tower, and lighted by a window on each side. It was wainscoted from floor to ceiling with dark oak, and had a little fireplace in one of the corners. The window-panes were small and set in lead. The curiosity of this room is, that it was once the residence of Pope, and that he here wrote a considerable part of the translation of Isomer, and likewise, no doubt, the admirable letters to which I have referred above. The room once contained a record by himself, scratched with a diamond on one of the window-panes (since removed for safe-keeping to Nuneham Courtney, where it was shown me), purporting that he had here finished the fifth book of the "Iliad" on such a day.

I mentioned that there were two towers left from the old castle: the one with the kitchen we’ve already seen, and the other, which is even more interesting, is what I’ll describe next. It stands about seventy feet tall, gray and impressive, but in great condition, although I couldn’t tell if anything had been done to restore it. The ground floor used to be the family chapel and is still a sacred place. At one corner of the tower is a circular turret, with a narrow staircase that winds around, its stone steps worn down from use, leading up to a room on each floor and finally to the battlemented roof. Climbing this turret staircase and reaching the third floor, we entered a room that wasn’t large but took up the entire area of the tower, lit by a window on each side. The walls were covered from floor to ceiling with dark oak panels, and there was a small fireplace in one corner. The window panes were small and set in lead. The interesting thing about this room is that it was once the home of Pope, and he wrote a significant portion of the translation of Isomer here, along with the remarkable letters I mentioned earlier. The room used to have a record made by him, scratched into one of the window panes with a diamond (which has since been moved for safekeeping to Nuneham Courtney, where I saw it), stating that he finished the fifth book of the "Iliad" on a specific date.

A poet has a fragrance about him, such as no other human being is gifted withal; it is indestructible, and clings forevermore to everything that he has touched. I was not impressed, at Blenheim, with any sense that the mighty Duke still haunted the palace that was created for him; but here, after a century and a half, we are still conscious of the presence of that decrepit little figure of Queen Anne's time, although he was merely a casual guest in the old tower, during one or two summer months. However brief the time and slight the connection, his spirit cannot be exorcised so long as the tower stands. In my mind, moreover, Pope, or any other person with an available claim, is right in adhering to the spot, dead or alive; for I never saw a chamber that I should like better to inhabit,—so comfortably small, in such a safe and inaccessible seclusion, and with a varied landscape from each window. One of them looks upon the church, close at hand, and down into the green churchyard, extending almost to the foot of the tower; the others have views wide and far, over a gently undulating tract of country. If desirous of a loftier elevation, about a dozen more steps of the turret-stair will bring the occupant to the summit of the tower,—where Pope used to come, no doubt, in the summer evenings, and peep—poor little shrimp that he was!— through the embrasures of the battlement.

A poet has a unique vibe about them, something no one else has; it’s everlasting and sticks to everything they’ve touched. I didn’t feel like the great Duke still lingered at Blenheim, the palace meant for him; but here, after one and a half centuries, we can still sense the presence of that frail little figure from Queen Anne's time, even though he was just a casual visitor in the old tower for a month or two each summer. No matter how brief his stay or how slight the connection, his spirit can’t be banished as long as the tower stands. In my opinion, Pope, or anyone else who has a claim, is right to hold onto this place, whether they’re alive or not; because I’ve never seen a room I’d prefer to stay in—so perfectly small, in a safe and secluded spot, with varied views from every window. One window looks out at the nearby church and down into the green churchyard that nearly touches the base of the tower; the others offer wide, far-reaching views over a gently rolling landscape. If you want a higher view, just climb about a dozen more steps of the turret stairs to reach the top of the tower—where Pope likely came during summer evenings, peeking—poor little guy!—through the gaps in the battlements.

From Stanton Harcourt we drove—I forget how far—to a point where a boat was waiting for us upon the Thames, or some other stream; for I am ashamed to confess my ignorance of the precise geographical whereabout. We were, at any rate, some miles above Oxford, and, I should imagine, pretty near one of the sources of England's mighty river. It was little more than wide enough for the boat, with extended oars, to pass, shallow, too, and bordered with bulrushes and water-weeds, which, in some places, quite overgrew the surface of the river from bank to bank. The shores were flat and meadow-like, and sometimes, the boatman told us, are overflowed by the rise of the stream. The water looked clean and pure, but not particularly transparent, though enough so to show us that the bottom is very much weedgrown; and I was told that the weed is an American production, brought to England with importations of timber, and now threatening to choke up the Thames and other English rivers. I wonder it does not try its obstructive powers upon the Merrimack, the Connecticut, or the Hudson,—not to speak of the St. Lawrence or the Mississippi!

From Stanton Harcourt, we drove — I can't remember how far — to a place where a boat was waiting for us on the Thames, or some other river; I’m embarrassed to admit I don’t know exactly where we were. We were definitely a few miles above Oxford, and I would guess we were pretty close to one of the sources of England's great river. It was barely wide enough for the boat with oars extended to pass through, shallow too, and lined with bulrushes and water weeds that, in some areas, completely covered the water from bank to bank. The shores were flat and meadow-like, and sometimes, the boatman told us, they get flooded when the water level rises. The water looked clean and pure, but not particularly clear, though it was clear enough to show us that the bottom was heavily covered in weeds; I was told that the weeds are an American species, brought to England along with timber, and are now threatening to clog the Thames and other English rivers. I wonder why it doesn’t try to obstruct the Merrimack, the Connecticut, or the Hudson — not to mention the St. Lawrence or the Mississippi!

It was an open boat, with cushioned seats astern, comfortably accommodating our party; the day continued sunny and warm, and perfectly still; the boatman, well trained to his business, managed the oars skilfully and vigorously; and we went down the stream quite as swiftly as it was desirable to go, the scene being so pleasant, and the passing hours so thoroughly agreeable. The river grew a little wider and deeper, perhaps, as we glided on, but was still an inconsiderable stream: for it had a good deal more than a hundred miles to meander through before it should bear fleets on its bosom, and reflect palaces and towers and Parliament houses and dingy and sordid piles of various structure, as it rolled two and fro with the tide, dividing London asunder. Not, in truth, that I ever saw any edifice whatever reflected in its turbid breast, when the sylvan stream, as we beheld it now, is swollen into the Thames at London.

It was an open boat, with cushioned seats at the back, comfortably fitting our group; the day was sunny and warm, completely still; the boatman, skilled at his job, handled the oars expertly and energetically; and we moved down the stream just as fast as we wanted to, the scenery was so pleasant, and the passing hours so enjoyable. The river widened and deepened a bit as we floated along, but it was still a minor stream: it had over a hundred miles to bend through before it could carry ships on its surface and reflect palaces, towers, Parliament buildings, and various rundown structures as it ebbed and flowed with the tide, dividing London in two. In truth, I never saw any building reflected in its muddy waters when the picturesque stream, as we saw it now, merged into the Thames at London.

Once, on our voyage, we had to land, while the boatman and some other persons drew our skiff round some rapids, which we could not otherwise have passed; another time, the boat went through a lock. We, meanwhile, stepped ashore to examine the ruins of the old nunnery of Godstowe, where Fair Rosamond secluded herself, after being separated from her royal lover. There is a long line of ruinous wall, and a shattered tower at one of the angles; the whole much ivy-grown,—brimming over, indeed, with clustering ivy, which is rooted inside of the walls. The nunnery is now, I believe, held in lease by the city of Oxford, which has converted its precincts into a barn-yard. The gate was under lock and key, so that we could merely look at the outside, and soon resumed our places in the boat.

Once, on our journey, we had to stop while the boatman and some others pulled our skiff around some rapids that we couldn't pass through. Another time, the boat went through a lock. Meanwhile, we got off to check out the ruins of the old nunnery of Godstowe, where Fair Rosamond hid away after being separated from her royal lover. There’s a long stretch of crumbling wall and a broken tower at one corner, all heavily covered in ivy—so much so that the ivy is rooted inside the walls. The nunnery is now, I think, leased by the city of Oxford, which has turned the area into a barnyard. The gate was locked, so we could only see the outside and soon got back on the boat.

At three o'clock or thereabouts (or sooner or later,—for I took little heed of time, and only wished that these delightful wanderings might last forever) we reached Folly Bridge, at Oxford. Here we took possession of a spacious barge, with a house in it, and a comfortable dining-room or drawing-room within the house, and a level roof, on which we could sit at ease, or dance if so inclined. These barges are common at Oxford,—some very splendid ones being owned by the students of the different colleges, or by clubs. They are drawn by horses, like canal-boats; and a horse being attached to our own barge, he trotted off at a reasonable pace, and we slipped through the water behind him, with a gentle and pleasant motion, which, save for the constant vicissitude of cultivated scenery, was like no motion at all. It was life without the trouble of living; nothing was ever more quietly agreeable. In this happy state of mind and body we gazed at Christ Church meadows, as we passed, and at the receding spires and towers of Oxford, and on a good deal of pleasant variety along the banks: young men rowing or fishing; troops of naked boys bathing, as if this were Arcadia, in the simplicity of the Golden Age; country-houses, cottages, water-side inns, all with something fresh about them, as not being sprinkled with the dust of the highway. We were a large party now; for a number of additional guests had joined us at Folly Bridge, and we comprised poets, novelists, scholars, sculptors, painters, architects, men and women of renown, dear friends, genial, outspoken, open-hearted Englishmen,—all voyaging onward together, like the wise ones of Gotham in a bowl. I remember not a single annoyance, except, indeed, that a swarm of wasps came aboard of us and alighted on the head of one of our young gentlemen, attracted by the scent of the pomatum which he had been rubbing into his hair. He was the only victim, and his small trouble the one little flaw in our day's felicity, to put us in mind that we were mortal.

At around three o'clock (or maybe a little earlier or later—I wasn’t really paying attention to the time and just hoped these wonderful adventures would last forever), we arrived at Folly Bridge in Oxford. There, we hopped onto a spacious barge, complete with a house in it, a comfortable dining or drawing room inside, and a flat roof where we could sit back or dance if we felt like it. These barges are common in Oxford—some of them are quite fancy and owned by students from various colleges or clubs. A horse was hitched to our barge, and it trotted along at a nice pace as we glided smoothly through the water behind it, with a gentle and pleasant motion that, aside from the ever-changing beautiful scenery, felt almost like not moving at all. It was life without the hassle of living; there was nothing more peacefully enjoyable. In this blissful state of mind and body, we admired Christ Church meadows as we passed by, observing the distant spires and towers of Oxford, and the pleasant variety along the banks: young men rowing or fishing, groups of naked boys swimming, as if we were in Arcadia during the simplicity of the Golden Age; country houses, cottages, and riverside inns, all appearing fresh and clean, untainted by the dust of the road. Our group had grown larger now as a number of additional guests had joined us at Folly Bridge, including poets, novelists, scholars, sculptors, painters, architects, renowned men and women, dear friends—friendly, open-hearted English people—all sailing onward together, like the wise people of Gotham in a bowl. I don’t recall a single annoyance, except that a swarm of wasps landed on one of our young gentlemen’s head, drawn in by the scent of the pomade he had been using in his hair. He was the only victim, and his small inconvenience was the one tiny flaw in our perfect day, reminding us that we were human.

Meanwhile a table had been laid in the interior of our barge, and spread with cold ham, cold fowl, cold pigeon-pie, cold beef, and other substantial cheer, such as the English love, and Yankees too,—besides tarts, and cakes, and pears, and plums,—not forgetting, of course, a goodly provision of port, sherry, and champagne, and bitter ale, which is like mother's milk to an Englishman, and soon grows equally acceptable to his American cousin. By the time these matters had been properly attended to, we had arrived at that part of the Thames which passes by Nuneham Courtney, a fine estate belonging to the Harcourts, and the present residence of the family. Here we landed, and, climbing a steep slope from the river-side, paused a moment or two to look at an architectural object, called the Carfax, the purport of which I do not well understand. Thence we proceeded onward, through the loveliest park and woodland scenery I ever saw, and under as beautiful a declining sunshine as heaven ever shed over earth, to the stately mansion-house.

Meanwhile, a table was set up inside our barge, covered with cold ham, cold chicken, cold pigeon pie, cold beef, and other hearty foods that the English love, as well as those from America—plus tarts, cakes, pears, and plums—not to mention a good supply of port, sherry, champagne, and bitter ale, which is like mother's milk to an Englishman and quickly becomes just as enjoyable for his American cousin. By the time we managed all of this, we had reached the part of the Thames that runs by Nuneham Courtney, a lovely estate owned by the Harcourts and currently the family’s home. We got out here, and after climbing a steep hill from the river, we paused for a moment to gaze at an architectural landmark called the Carfax, the purpose of which I don't quite understand. From there, we continued on through the most beautiful park and woodland scenery I had ever seen, under as lovely a setting sun as heaven has ever cast on earth, towards the grand mansion.

As we here cross a private threshold, it is not allowable to pursue my feeble narrative of this delightful day with the same freedom as heretofore; so, perhaps, I may as well bring it to a close. I may mention, however, that I saw the library, a fine, large apartment, hung round with portraits of eminent literary men, principally of the last century, most of whom were familiar guests of the Harcourts. The house itself is about eighty years old, and is built in the classic style, as if the family had been anxious to diverge as far as possible from the Gothic picturesqueness of their old abode at Stanton Harcourt. The grounds were laid out in part by Capability Brown, and seemed to me even more beautiful than those of Blenheim. Mason the poet, a friend of the house, gave the design of a portion of the garden. Of the whole place I will not be niggardly of my rude Transatlantic praise, but be bold to say that it appeared to me as perfect as anything earthly can he,—utterly and entirely finished, as if the years and generations had done all that the hearts and minds of the successive owners could contrive for a spot they dearly loved. Such homes as Nuneham Courtney are among the splendid results of long hereditary possession; and we Republicans, whose households melt away like new-fallen snow in a spring morning, must content ourselves with our many counterbalancing advantages, for this one, so apparently desirable to the far-projecting selfishness of our nature, we are certain never to attain.

As we cross into this private space, I can't continue my weak story about this lovely day with the same openness as before, so maybe it's best to wrap it up. I should mention, though, that I saw the library, a spacious room adorned with portraits of notable writers, mainly from the last century, most of whom were regular visitors to the Harcourts. The house itself is around eighty years old and was built in a classic style, as if the family wanted to distance themselves from the Gothic charm of their former home at Stanton Harcourt. The grounds were partially designed by Capability Brown and seemed even more beautiful than those at Blenheim. Mason the poet, a friend of the family, contributed to the design of part of the garden. I won't hold back on my crude Transatlantic praise for the entire place; I dare say it seemed as perfect as anything on this earth can be—utterly and completely finished, as if the years and generations had achieved everything that the hearts and minds of the successive owners could imagine for a treasured spot. Homes like Nuneham Courtney are among the magnificent results of long-term family ownership; and we Republicans, whose households dissolve like new snow on a spring morning, must be satisfied with our many offsetting advantages, for this one, so seemingly desirable to the far-reaching selfishness of human nature, we know we will never achieve.

It must not be supposed, nevertheless, that Nuneham Courtney is one of the great show-places of England. It is merely a fair specimen of the better class of country-seats, and has a hundred rivals, and many superiors, in the features of beauty, and expansive, manifold, redundant comfort, which most impressed me. A moderate man might be content with such a home,—that is all.

It shouldn’t be assumed, however, that Nuneham Courtney is one of the major attractions in England. It’s simply a decent example of a nice country house and has numerous rivals, as well as many that surpass it, in terms of beauty and the extensive, varied, and abundant comfort that impressed me the most. A reasonable person might be satisfied with such a home—that’s all.

And now I take leave of Oxford without even an attempt to describe it,— there being no literary faculty, attainable or conceivable by me, which can avail to put it adequately, or even tolerably, upon paper. It must remain its own sole expression; and those whose sad fortune it may be never to behold it have no better resource than to dream about gray, weather-stained, ivy-grown edifices, wrought with quaint Gothic ornament, and standing around grassy quadrangles, where cloistered walks have echoed to the quiet footsteps of twenty generations,—lawns and gardens of luxurious repose, shadowed with canopies of foliage, and lit up with sunny glimpses through archways of great boughs,—spires, towers, and turrets, each with its history and legend,—dimly magnificent chapels, with painted windows of rare beauty and brilliantly diversified hues, creating an atmosphere of richest gloom,—vast college-halls, high-windowed, oaken-panelled, and hung round with portraits of the men, in every age, whom the University has nurtured to be illustrious,—long vistas of alcoved libraries, where the wisdom and learned folly of all time is shelved,—kitchens (we throw in this feature by way of ballast, and because it would not be English Oxford without its beef and beer), with huge fireplaces, capable of roasting a hundred joints at once,—and cavernous cellars, where rows of piled-up hogsheads seethe and fume with that mighty malt-liquor which is the true milk of Alma Mater; make all these things vivid in your dream, and you will never know nor believe how inadequate is the result to represent even the merest outside of Oxford.

And now I leave Oxford without even trying to describe it,— there’s no way I can convey it adequately, or even decently, on paper. It has to speak for itself; and for those unfortunate enough never to see it, all they can do is imagine gray, weathered, ivy-covered buildings, embellished with unique Gothic designs, surrounding grassy courtyards where secluded paths have echoed the quiet footsteps of twenty generations,—lawns and gardens of luxurious tranquility, shaded with leafy canopies, and illuminated by sunny glimpses through archways of large branches,—spires, towers, and turrets, each with its own history and legend,—dimly magnificent chapels, with stained glass windows of rare beauty and vibrant colors, creating a rich atmosphere of gloom,—vast college halls, tall-windowed, oak-paneled, and adorned with portraits of the notable men that the University has cultivated throughout the ages,—long corridors of alcoved libraries, where the wisdom and foolishness of all time are stored,—kitchens (we mention this for balance, and because it wouldn’t be true Oxford without its beef and beer), with huge fireplaces capable of roasting a hundred joints at once,—and cavernous cellars, where rows of stacked barrels bubble and steam with the powerful brews that are the true essence of Alma Mater; imagine all these things vividly in your dreams, and you will never truly know or believe how inadequate this description is to capture even the slightest glimpse of Oxford.

We feel a genuine reluctance to conclude this article without making our grateful acknowledgments, by name, to a gentleman whose overflowing kindness was the main condition of all our sight-seeings and enjoyments. Delightful as will always be our recollection of Oxford and its neighborhood, we partly suspect that it owes much of its happy coloring to the genial medium through which the objects were presented to us,—to the kindly magic of a hospitality unsurpassed, within our experience, in the quality of making the guest contented with his host, with himself, and everything about him. He has inseparably mingled his image with our remembrance of the Spires of Oxford.

We really don’t want to finish this article without expressing our heartfelt thanks to a gentleman whose incredible kindness made all our sightseeing and experiences possible. While we will always fondly remember Oxford and its surroundings, we suspect that much of its charm comes from the warm environment through which everything was shown to us—thanks to a hospitality that is unmatched, in our experience, at making guests feel happy with their host, themselves, and everything around them. His presence has become intertwined with our memories of the Spires of Oxford.





SOME OF THE HAUNTS OF BURNS.

We left Carlisle at a little past eleven, and within the half-hour were at Gretna Green. Thence we rushed onward into Scotland through a flat and dreary tract of country, consisting mainly of desert and bog, where probably the moss-troopers were accustomed to take refuge after their raids into England. Anon, however, the hills hove themselves up to view, occasionally attaining a height which might almost be called mountainous. In about two hours we reached Dumfries, and alighted at the station there.

We left Carlisle just after eleven, and within half an hour, we arrived at Gretna Green. From there, we sped into Scotland through a flat and dull stretch of land, mostly wasteland and marsh, where the moss-troopers likely used to hide after their raids into England. Soon, though, the hills came into view, sometimes reaching heights that could almost be considered mountainous. After about two hours, we reached Dumfries and got off at the station there.

Chill as the Scottish summer is reputed to be, we found it an awfully hot day, not a whit less so than the day before; but we sturdily adventured through the burning sunshine up into the town, inquiring our way to the residence of Burns. The street leading from the station is called Shakespeare Street; and at its farther extremity we read "Burns Street" on a corner-house, the avenue thus designated having been formerly known as "Mill-Hole Brae." It is a vile lane, paved with small, hard stones from side to side, and bordered by cottages or mean houses of whitewashed stone, joining one to another along the whole length of the street. With not a tree, of course, or a blade of grass between the paving-stones, the narrow lane was as hot as Topbet, and reeked with a genuine Scotch odor, being infested with unwashed children, and altogether in a state of chronic filth; although some women seemed to be hopelessly scrubbing the thresholds of their wretched dwellings. I never saw an outskirt of a town less fit for a poet's residence, or in which it would be more miserable for any man of cleanly predilections to spend his days.

As chilly as Scottish summers are said to be, we found it to be an incredibly hot day, just as sweltering as the day before; but we bravely made our way through the blazing sunshine up into the town, asking for directions to Burns' home. The road leading from the station is called Shakespeare Street; at the far end, we saw "Burns Street" on a corner house, the street having previously been known as "Mill-Hole Brae." It's an awful narrow lane, paved with small, hard stones from one side to the other, lined with cottages or shabby houses of whitewashed stone, connected along the entire length of the street. With no trees or blades of grass between the paving stones, the narrow lane was as hot as a furnace, and it stank of a true Scottish smell, filled with unwashed children and generally in a state of constant mess; although some women appeared to be scrubbing the doorsteps of their miserable homes. I never saw a town's outskirts less suitable for a poet to live in, or a place where it would be more miserable for any cleanly-minded person to spend their days.

We asked for Burns's dwelling; and a woman pointed across the street to a two-story house, built of stone, and whitewashed, like its neighbors, but perhaps of a little more respectable aspect than most of them, though I hesitate in saying so. It was not a separate structure, but under the same continuous roof with the next. There was an inscription on the door, hearing no reference to Burns, but indicating that the house was now occupied by a ragged or industrial school. On knocking, we were instantly admitted by a servant-girl, who smiled intelligently when we told our errand, and showed us into a low and very plain parlor, not more than twelve or fifteen feet square. A young woman, who seemed to be a teacher in the school, soon appeared, and told us that this had been Burns's usual sitting-room, and that he had written many of his songs here.

We asked for Burns's home, and a woman pointed across the street to a two-story stone house that was whitewashed like its neighbors, but perhaps looked a bit more respectable than most of them, though I'm hesitant to say that. It wasn’t a standalone building but shared the same continuous roof with the one next to it. There was an inscription on the door that made no mention of Burns but indicated that the house was now used as a ragged or industrial school. When we knocked, a servant girl quickly let us in, smiling knowingly when we explained our purpose, and showed us into a low, very plain parlor that was only about twelve or fifteen feet square. A young woman, who seemed to be a teacher at the school, soon came in and told us that this room had been Burns's usual sitting room, and that he had written many of his songs here.

She then led us up a narrow staircase into a little bedchamber over the parlor. Connecting with it, there is a very small room, or windowed closet, which Burns used as a study; and the bedchamber itself was the one where he slept in his later lifetime, and in which he died at last. Altogether, it is an exceedingly unsuitable place for a pastoral and rural poet to live or die in,—even more unsatisfactory than Shakespeare's house, which has a certain homely picturesqueness that contrasts favorably with the suburban sordidness of the abode before us. The narrow lane, the paving-stones, and the contiguity of wretched hovels are depressing to remember; and the steam of them (such is our human weakness) might almost make the poet's memory less fragrant.

She then took us up a narrow staircase into a small bedroom above the living room. Connected to it is a tiny room, or windowed closet, that Burns used as a study; and the bedroom itself was where he slept later in life and where he eventually died. Overall, it’s a very unsuitable place for a pastoral and rural poet to live or die in— even less appealing than Shakespeare's house, which has a certain cozy charm that stands in stark contrast to the suburban dreariness of the place we’re in. The narrow lane, the cobblestones, and the proximity of squalid shacks are disheartening to think about; and their stench (such is our human frailty) might almost make the poet's memory less pleasant.

As already observed, it was an intolerably hot day. After leaving the house, we found our way into the principal street of the town, which, it may be fair to say, is of very different aspect from the wretched outskirt above described. Entering a hotel (in which, as a Dumfries guide-book assured us, Prince Charles Edward had once spent a night), we rested and refreshed ourselves, and then set forth in quest of the mausoleum of Burns.

As already noted, it was an unbearably hot day. After leaving the house, we made our way to the main street of the town, which, to be fair, looks very different from the miserable outskirts previously mentioned. We entered a hotel (where, as a Dumfries guidebook informed us, Prince Charles Edward had once spent a night), rested, and refreshed ourselves before heading out in search of Burns' mausoleum.

Coming to St. Michael's Church, we saw a man digging a grave, and, scrambling out of the hole, he let us into the churchyard, which was crowded full of monuments. Their general shape and construction are peculiar to Scotland, being a perpendicular tablet of marble or other stone, within a framework of the same material, somewhat resembling the frame of a looking-glass; and, all over the churchyard, those sepulchral memorials rise to the height of ten, fifteen, or twenty feet, forming quite an imposing collection of monuments, but inscribed with names of small general significance. It was easy, indeed, to ascertain the rank of those who slept below; for in Scotland it is the custom to put the occupation of the buried personage (as "Skinner," "Shoemaker," "Flesher") on his tombstone. As another peculiarity, wives are buried under their maiden names, instead of those of their husbands; thus giving a disagreeable impression that the married pair have bidden each other an eternal farewell on the edge of the grave.

Arriving at St. Michael's Church, we noticed a man digging a grave, and after he climbed out of the hole, he let us enter the churchyard, which was packed with monuments. Their overall shape and design are unique to Scotland, featuring a vertical tablet of marble or another stone, set within a frame of the same material, somewhat like a mirror frame; and throughout the churchyard, these memorials reach heights of ten, fifteen, or even twenty feet, creating quite an impressive display of monuments, though inscribed with names of little significance. It was easy to identify the social status of those resting below; in Scotland, it's customary to include the occupation of the deceased (like "Skinner," "Shoemaker," "Flesher") on their tombstones. Another unique aspect is that wives are buried under their maiden names instead of their husbands', which gives an unsettling impression that the married couple has said an eternal goodbye at the brink of the grave.

There was a foot-path through this crowded churchyard, sufficiently well worn to guide us to the grave of Burns; but a woman followed behind us, who, it appeared, kept the key of the mausoleum, and was privileged to show it to strangers. The monument is a sort of Grecian temple, with pilasters and a dome, covering a space of about twenty feet square. It was formerly open to all the inclemencies of the Scotch atmosphere, but is now protected and shut in by large squares of rough glass, each pane being of the size of one whole side of the structure. The woman unlocked the door, and admitted us into the interior. Inlaid into the floor of the mausoleum is the gravestone of Burns,—the very same that was laid over his grave by Jean Armour, before this monument was built. Displayed against the surrounding wall is a marble statue of Burns at the plough, with the Genius of Caledonia summoning the ploughman to turn poet. Methought it was not a very successful piece of work; for the plough was better sculptured than the man, and the man, though heavy and cloddish, was more effective than the goddess. Our guide informed us that an old man of ninety, who knew Burns, certifies this statue to be very like the original.

There was a worn path through this busy churchyard that guided us to Burns' grave, but a woman followed us, who seemed to hold the key to the mausoleum and was allowed to show it to visitors. The monument resembles a Grecian temple, with columns and a dome, covering an area of about twenty square feet. It used to be open to the harsh Scottish weather but is now enclosed and protected by large panels of rough glass, each pane the size of one side of the structure. The woman unlocked the door and let us into the interior. Inlaid into the mausoleum floor is Burns' gravestone—the very same one placed over his grave by Jean Armour before this monument was erected. Displayed against the surrounding wall is a marble statue of Burns at the plow, with the Genius of Caledonia calling the plowman to become a poet. I thought it wasn't a very successful piece; the plow was better sculpted than the man, and the man, though heavy and clumsy, was more striking than the goddess. Our guide told us that an old man of ninety, who knew Burns, attests that this statue looks very much like the original.

The bones of the poet, and of Jean Armour, and of some of their children, lie in the vault over which we stood. Our guide (who was intelligent, in her own plain way, and very agreeable to talk withal) said that the vault was opened about three weeks ago, on occasion of the burial of the eldest son of Burns. The poet's bones were disturbed, and the dry skull, once so brimming over with powerful thought and bright and tender fantasies, was taken away, and kept for several days by a Dumfries doctor. It has since been deposited in a new leaden coffin, and restored to the vault. We learned that there is a surviving daughter of Burns's eldest son, and daughters likewise of the two younger sons,—and, besides these, an illegitimate posterity by the eldest son, who appears to have been of disreputable life in his younger days. He inherited his father's failings, with some faint shadow, I have also understood, of the great qualities which have made the world tender of his father's vices and weaknesses.

The remains of the poet, Jean Armour, and some of their children lie in the vault we stood over. Our guide, who was smart in her own down-to-earth way and very pleasant to chat with, mentioned that the vault was opened about three weeks ago for the burial of Burns' eldest son. The poet's remains were disturbed, and the dry skull, once filled with powerful thoughts and beautiful, tender fantasies, was taken away and kept for several days by a doctor in Dumfries. It has since been placed in a new lead coffin and returned to the vault. We found out there's a surviving daughter of Burns' eldest son, along with daughters of the two younger sons, and besides them, there’s an illegitimate line from the eldest son, who seems to have led a more questionable life in his younger days. He inherited his father's flaws, but I've also heard that he shares some faint traces of the great qualities that have made the world sympathetic to his father's vices and weaknesses.

We listened readily enough to this paltry gossip, but found that it robbed the poet's memory of some of the reverence that was its due. Indeed, this talk over his grave had very much the same tendency and effect as the home-scene of his life, which we had been visiting just previously. Beholding his poor, mean dwelling and its surroundings, and picturing his outward life and earthly manifestations from these, one does not so much wonder that the people of that day should have failed to recognize all that was admirable and immortal in a disreputable, drunken, shabbily clothed, and shabbily housed man, consorting with associates of damaged character, and, as his only ostensible occupation, gauging the whiskey, which he too often tasted. Siding with Burns, as we needs must, in his plea against the world, let us try to do the world a little justice too. It is far easier to know and honor a poet when his fame has taken shape in the spotlessness of marble than when the actual man comes staggering before you, besmeared with the sordid stains of his daily life. For my part, I chiefly wonder that his recognition dawned so brightly while he was still living. There must have been something very grand in his immediate presence, some strangely impressive characteristic in his natural behavior, to have caused him to seem like a demigod so soon.

We were quick to listen to this trivial gossip, but it diminished the respect the poet deserved. In fact, this chatter around his grave had a similar effect as the home we had just visited from his life. Seeing his small, shabby home and its surroundings, and imagining his outward life and earthly experiences from these, it's not surprising that people of that time failed to see all that was admirable and timeless in a disreputable, drunk, poorly dressed, and poorly housed man, hanging out with questionable associates, and whose only visible job was measuring the whiskey he often drank. While we must side with Burns in his criticism of the world, let’s also try to give the world a bit of credit. It’s much easier to appreciate and honor a poet when his legacy is represented in the purity of marble than when the actual man stands before you, stained by the dirt of his daily struggles. Personally, I’m mainly amazed that his recognition came so brightly while he was still alive. There must have been something truly remarkable about his immediate presence, some striking quality in his natural demeanor, that made him seem like a demigod so quickly.

As we went back through the churchyard, we saw a spot where nearly four hundred inhabitants of Dumfries were buried during the cholera year; and also some curious old monuments, with raised letters, the inscriptions on which were not sufficiently legible to induce us to puzzle them out; but, I believe, they mark the resting-places of old Covenanters, some of whom were killed by Claverhouse and his fellow-ruffians.

As we walked back through the churchyard, we noticed a section where almost four hundred residents of Dumfries were buried during the cholera outbreak. We also saw some interesting old tombstones with raised letters, but the inscriptions were too faded for us to decipher. I think they mark the burial sites of old Covenanters, some of whom were killed by Claverhouse and his violent associates.

St. Michael's Church is of red freestone, and was built about a hundred years ago, on an old Catholic foundation. Our guide admitted us into it, and showed us, in the porch, a very pretty little marble figure of a child asleep, with a drapery over the lower part, from beneath which appeared its two baby feet. It was truly a sweet little statue; and the woman told us that it represented a child of the sculptor, and that the baby (here still in its marble infancy) had died more than twenty-six years ago. "Many ladies," she said, "especially such as had ever lost a child, had shed tears over it." It was very pleasant to think of the sculptor bestowing the best of his genius and art to re-create his tender child in stone, and to make the representation as soft and sweet as the original; but the conclusion of the story has something that jars with our awakened sensibilities. A gentleman from London had seen the statue, and was so much delighted with it that he bought it of the father-artist, after it had lain above a quarter of a century in the church-porch. So this was not the real, tender image that came out of the father's heart; he had sold that truest one for a hundred guineas, and sculptured this mere copy to replace it. The first figure was entirely naked in its earthly and spiritual innocence. The copy, as I have said above, has a drapery over the lower limbs. But, after all, if we come to the truth of the matter, the sleeping baby may be as fully reposited in the drawing-room of a connoisseur as in a cold and dreary church-porch.

St. Michael's Church is made of red freestone and was built about a hundred years ago on an old Catholic foundation. Our guide took us inside and showed us, in the porch, a beautiful little marble figure of a child asleep, draped over the lower part, with its tiny feet peeking out. It was truly a lovely statue, and the woman explained that it represented the sculptor's child, who had died over twenty-six years ago. "Many women," she said, "especially those who have lost a child, have cried over it." It was nice to think about the sculptor pouring all his talent and artistry into recreating his beloved child in stone, making the representation as soft and sweet as the original. However, the end of the story feels a bit unsettling to our modern sensibilities. A man from London saw the statue and loved it so much that he bought it from the artist father after it had been in the church porch for more than twenty-five years. So, this was not the genuine, heartfelt image that came from the father's soul; he had sold that true piece for a hundred guineas and made this mere replica to replace it. The original figure was completely naked in its earthly and spiritual innocence. The replica, as mentioned before, has drapery over the lower limbs. Ultimately, if we get down to it, the sleeping baby could be just as comfortably placed in a connoisseur's drawing-room as it would be in a cold and dreary church porch.

We went into the church, and found it very plain and naked, without altar-decorations, and having its floor quite covered with unsightly wooden pews. The woman led us to a pew cornering on one of the side-aisles, and, telling us that it used to be Burns's family-pew, showed us his seat, which is in the corner by the aisle. It is so situated, that a sturdy pillar hid him from the pulpit, and from the minister's eye; "for Robin was no great friends with the ministers," said she. This touch—his seat behind the pillar, and Burns himself nodding in sermon-time, or keenly observant of profane things—brought him before us to the life. In the corner-seat of the next pew, right before Burns, and not more than two feet off, sat the young lady on whom the poet saw that unmentionable parasite which he has immortalized in song. We were ungenerous enough to ask the lady's name, but the good woman could not tell it. This was the last thing which we saw in Dumfries worthy of record; and it ought to be noted that our guide refused some money which my companion offered her, because I had already paid her what she deemed sufficient.

We entered the church and found it very plain and bare, with no altar decorations and a floor completely covered with unattractive wooden pews. The woman led us to a pew in the corner of one of the side aisles and informed us that it used to be Burns's family pew, pointing out his seat, which is in the corner by the aisle. It was positioned so that a sturdy pillar blocked him from the pulpit and the minister's view; "because Robin wasn't on great terms with the ministers," she said. This detail—his seat behind the pillar, with Burns himself dozing during sermons or keenly observing worldly matters—brought him vividly to life for us. In the corner seat of the next pew, right in front of Burns and only about two feet away, sat the young lady whom the poet referred to in his famous song. We were unkind enough to ask for the lady's name, but the kind woman couldn’t provide it. This was the last noteworthy thing we saw in Dumfries, and it's worth mentioning that our guide declined some money that my companion offered her because I had already given her what she considered enough.

At the railway-station we spent more than a weary hour, waiting for the train, which at last came up, and took us to Mauchline. We got into an omnibus, the only conveyance to be had, and drove about a mile to the village, where we established ourselves at the Loudoun Hotel, one of the veriest country inns which we have found in Great Britain. The town of Mauchline, a place more redolent of Burns than almost any other, consists of a street or two of contiguous cottages, mostly whitewashed, and with thatched roofs. It has nothing sylvan or rural in the immediate village, and is as ugly a place as mortal man could contrive to make, or to render uglier through a succession of untidy generations. The fashion of paving the village street, and patching one shabby house on the gable-end of another, quite shuts out all verdure and pleasantness; but, I presume, we are not likely to see a more genuine old Scotch village, such as they used to be in Burns's time, and long before, than this of Mauchline. The church stands about midway up the street, and is built of red freestone, very simple in its architecture, with a square tower and pinnacles. In this sacred edifice, and its churchyard, was the scene of one of Burns's most characteristic productions, "The Holy Fair."

At the train station, we spent more than an exhausting hour waiting for the train, which finally arrived and took us to Mauchline. We hopped on a bus, the only ride available, and traveled about a mile to the village, where we settled in at the Loudoun Hotel, one of the most basic country inns we've come across in Great Britain. The town of Mauchline, a place closely associated with Burns more than almost anywhere else, consists of a street or two of neighboring cottages, mostly painted white, with thatched roofs. There's nothing picturesque or rural about the immediate village, and it's as unattractive as a place could be made, or made even uglier by a history of messy generations. The way the village street is paved and the patchwork of shabby houses piled on each other completely blocks out any greenery or charm; however, I guess we’re not likely to find a more authentic old Scottish village, like those in Burns's time and long before, than this one in Mauchline. The church is about halfway up the street, built from red freestone, very simple in design, with a square tower and spires. In this sacred building and its graveyard took place one of Burns's most characteristic works, "The Holy Fair."

Almost directly opposite its gate, across the village street, stands Posie Nansie's inn, where the "Jolly Beggars" congregated. The latter is a two-story, red-stone, thatched house, looking old, but by no means venerable, like a drunken patriarch. It has small, old-fashioned windows, and may well have stood for centuries,—though, seventy or eighty years ago, when Burns was conversant with it, I should fancy it might have been something better than a beggars' alehouse. The whole town of Mauchline looks rusty and time-worn,—even the newer houses, of which there are several, being shadowed and darkened by the general aspect of the place. When we arrived, all the wretched little dwellings seemed to have belched forth their inhabitants into the warm summer evening; everybody was chatting with everybody, on the most familiar terms; the bare-legged children gambolled or quarrelled uproariously, and came freely, moreover, and looked into the window of our parlor. When we ventured out, we were followed by the gaze of the old town: people standing in their doorways, old women popping their heads from the chamber-windows, and stalwart men idle on Saturday at e'en, after their week's hard labor—clustering at the street-corners, merely to stare at our unpretending selves. Except in some remote little town of Italy (where, besides, the inhabitants had the intelligible stimulus of beggary), I have never been honored with nearly such an amount of public notice.

Almost directly across from its gate, on the village street, is Posie Nansie's inn, where the "Jolly Beggars" gathered. It's a two-story, red-stone building with a thatched roof that looks old, though not ancient, like a tipsy elder. It has small, old-fashioned windows and might have been around for centuries—though, seventy or eighty years ago, when Burns knew it, I imagine it was more than just a beggars' bar. The whole town of Mauchline appears worn and decrepit—even the newer houses, of which there are a few, seem overshadowed and darkened by the overall look of the place. When we got there, all the shabby little homes seemed to have released their residents into the warm summer evening; everyone was chatting with everyone, all on familiar terms; the bare-legged kids were playing and fighting loudly, and they came up to peek into our parlor window. When we stepped out, we felt the old town's eyes on us: people standing in doorways, old women leaning out of their windows, and sturdy men hanging around the street corners on a Saturday evening after a long week of hard work, just to stare at our unremarkable selves. I have never experienced such a level of public attention, except maybe in some remote little town in Italy (where, by the way, the locals had the clear incentive of begging).

The next forenoon my companion put me to shame by attending church, after vainly exhorting me to do the like; and, it being Sacrament Sunday, and my poor friend being wedged into the farther end of a closely filled pew, he was forced to stay through the preaching of four several sermons, and came back perfectly exhausted and desperate. He was somewhat consoled, however, on finding that he had witnessed a spectacle of Scotch manners identical with that of Burns's "Holy Fair," on the very spot where the poet located that immortal description. By way of further conformance to the customs of the country, we ordered a sheep's head and the broth, and did penance accordingly; and at five o'clock we took a fly, and set out for Burns's farm of Moss Giel.

The next morning, my friend embarrassed me by going to church after trying in vain to get me to join him. Since it was Sacrament Sunday and my poor friend was stuck at the far end of a crowded pew, he had to sit through four different sermons and came back completely worn out and frustrated. However, he felt a bit better when he realized he had witnessed a scene of Scottish customs exactly like the one in Burns's "Holy Fair," right where the poet described it. To further embrace the local traditions, we ordered a sheep's head and broth and went through with it. By five o'clock, we took a carriage and set off for Burns's farm at Moss Giel.

Moss Giel is not more than a mile from Mauchline, and the road extends over a high ridge of land, with a view of far hills and green slopes on either side. Just before we reached the farm, the driver stopped to point out a hawthorn, growing by the wayside, which he said was Burns's "Lousie Thorn"; and I devoutly plucked a branch, although I have really forgotten where or how this illustrious shrub has been celebrated. We then turned into a rude gateway, and almost immediately came to the farm-house of Moss Giel, standing some fifty yards removed from the high-road, behind a tall hedge of hawthorn, and considerably overshadowed by trees. The house is a whitewashed stone cottage, like thousands of others in England and Scotland, with a thatched roof, on which grass and weeds have intruded a picturesque, though alien growth. There is a door and one window in front, besides another little window that peeps out among the thatch. Close by the cottage, and extending back at right angles from it, so as to enclose the farm-yard, are two other buildings of the same size, shape, and general appearance as the house: any one of the three looks just as fit for a human habitation as the two others, and all three look still more suitable for donkey-stables and pigsties. As we drove into the farm-yard, bounded on three sides by these three hovels, a large dog began to bark at us; and some women and children made their appearance, but seemed to demur about admitting us, because the master and mistress were very religious people, and had not yet come back from the Sacrament at Mauchline.

Moss Giel is just under a mile from Mauchline, and the road goes over a high ridge with views of distant hills and green slopes on both sides. Just before we got to the farm, the driver stopped to show us a hawthorn growing by the roadside, which he said was Burns's "Lousie Thorn"; I eagerly picked a branch, even though I’ve really forgotten where or how this famous bush was celebrated. We then turned into a rough gateway and quickly arrived at the Moss Giel farmhouse, about fifty yards from the main road, behind a tall hawthorn hedge, and largely shaded by trees. The house is a whitewashed stone cottage, like thousands of others in England and Scotland, with a thatched roof where grass and weeds have formed a picturesque, but unwanted growth. There’s a door and one window in front, plus another little window peeking out from the thatch. Close to the cottage, extending back at right angles from it to enclose the farmyard, are two other buildings that match the house in size, shape, and general appearance: any one of the three would be just as suitable for living in as the others, and all three seem even more appropriate for housing donkeys and pigs. As we drove into the farmyard, surrounded on three sides by these three structures, a large dog started barking at us; some women and children appeared but seemed uncertain about letting us in since the master and mistress were very religious people and hadn’t returned from the Sacrament in Mauchline yet.

However, it would not do to be turned back from the very threshold of Robert Burns; and as the women seemed to be merely straggling visitors, and nobody, at all events, had a right to send us away, we went into the back door, and, turning to the right, entered a kitchen. It showed a deplorable lack of housewifely neatness, and in it there were three or four children, one of whom, a girl eight or nine years old, held a baby in her arms. She proved to be the daughter of the people of the house, and gave us what leave she could to look about us. Thence we stepped across the narrow mid-passage of the cottage into the only other apartment below stairs, a sitting-room, where we found a young man eating broad and cheese. He informed us that he did not live there, and had only called in to refresh himself on his way home from church. This room, like the kitchen, was a noticeably poor one, and, besides being all that the cottage had to show for a parlor, it was a sleeping-apartment, having two beds, which might be curtained off, on occasion. The young man allowed us liberty (so far as in him lay) to go up stairs. Up we crept, accordingly; and a few steps brought us to the top of the staircase, over the kitchen, where we found the wretchedest little sleeping-chamber in the world, with a sloping roof under the thatch, and two beds spread upon the bare floor. This, most probably, was Burns's chamber; or, perhaps, it may have been that of his mother's servant-maid; and, in either case, this rude floor, at one time or another, must have creaked beneath the poet's midnight tread. On the opposite side of the passage was the door of another attic-chamber, opening which, I saw a considerable number of cheeses on the floor.

However, it wouldn’t be right to be turned away from the very doorstep of Robert Burns; and since the women seemed to be just casual visitors, and nobody had the authority to send us away, we went through the back door, turned to the right, and entered a kitchen. It was messier than you’d expect, and there were three or four children in there, one of whom, a girl about eight or nine, held a baby in her arms. She turned out to be the daughter of the house's occupants and gave us what permission she could to look around. From there, we crossed the narrow hallway of the cottage into the only other room downstairs, a sitting room, where we found a young man eating bread and cheese. He told us that he didn’t live there and had just stopped in to grab a bite on his way home from church. This room, like the kitchen, was noticeably shabby, and aside from being all the cottage had for a living space, it also served as a bedroom, with two beds that could be curtained off when needed. The young man kindly allowed us to go upstairs. So, we climbed the stairs, and a few steps led us to the top of the staircase, above the kitchen, where we found the tiniest, most miserable sleeping room ever, with a sloped roof under the thatch and two beds laid out on the bare floor. This was probably Burns's room; or maybe it belonged to his mother's maid; in either case, this rough floor must have creaked under the poet's footsteps at some point. On the opposite side of the hallway was the door to another attic room, and when I opened it, I noticed a fair number of cheeses scattered on the floor.

The whole house was pervaded with a frowzy smell, and also a dunghill odor; and it is not easy to understand how the atmosphere of such a dwelling can be any more agreeable or salubrious morally than it appeared to be physically. No virgin, surely, could keep a holy awe about her while stowed higgledy-piggledy with coarse-natured rustics into this narrowness and filth. Such a habitation is calculated to make beasts of men and women; and it indicates a degree of barbarism which I did not imagine to exist in Scotland, that a tiller of broad fields, like the farmer of Mauchline, should have his abode in a pigsty. It is sad to think of anybody—not to say a poet, but any human being—sleeping, eating, thinking, praying, and spending all his home-life in this miserable hovel; but, methinks, I never in the least knew how to estimate the miracle of Burns's genius, nor his heroic merit for being no worse man, until I thus learned the squalid hindrances amid which he developed himself. Space, a free atmosphere, and cleanliness have a vast deal to do with the possibilities of human virtue.

The whole house was filled with a musty smell and the stench of waste; it’s hard to see how the environment of such a place could be any more pleasant or healthy in a moral sense than it was physically. No pure woman could possibly feel a sense of sacredness while crammed together with rough country folks in this cramped and filthy space. Such a home is likely to turn people into animals; it shows a level of backwardness I didn’t think existed in Scotland, that a farmer like the one in Mauchline could live in such a pigsty. It’s tragic to imagine anyone—not to mention a poet—sleeping, eating, thinking, praying, and living their whole life in this wretched shanty; but I never truly understood the miracle of Burns's talent or his incredible strength in not being a worse person until I saw the filthy obstacles he had to deal with. Space, fresh air, and cleanliness play a huge role in the potential for human goodness.

The biographers talk of the farm of Moss Giel as being damp and unwholesome; but, I do not see why, outside of the cottage-walls, it should possess so evil a reputation. It occupies a high, broad ridge, enjoying, surely, whatever benefit can come of a breezy site, and sloping far downward before any marshy soil is reached. The high hedge, and the trees that stand beside the cottage, give it a pleasant aspect enough to one who does not know the grimy secrets of the interior; and the summer afternoon was now so bright that I shall remember the scene with a great deal of sunshine over it.

The biographers describe Moss Giel’s farm as damp and unhealthy; however, I don’t understand why, outside the cottage walls, it should have such a bad reputation. It sits on a high, broad ridge, definitely benefiting from a breezy location, and slopes down well before reaching any marshy land. The tall hedge and the trees next to the cottage give it a nice appearance, especially to someone unaware of the dark secrets inside; and the summer afternoon was so bright that I will always remember the scene, bathed in plenty of sunshine.

Leaving the cottage, we drove through a field, which the driver told us was that in which Burns turned up the mouse's nest. It is the enclosure nearest to the cottage, and seems now to be a pasture, and a rather remarkably unfertile one. A little farther on, the ground was whitened with an immense number of daisies,—daisies, daisies everywhere; and in answer to my inquiry, the driver said that this was the field where Burns ran his ploughshare over the daisy. If so, the soil seems to have been consecrated to daisies by the song which he bestowed on that first immortal one. I alighted, and plucked a whole handful of these "wee, modest, crimson-tipped flowers," which will be precious to many friends in our own country as coming from Burns's farm, and being of the same race and lineage as that daisy which he turned into an amaranthine flower while seeming to destroy it.

Leaving the cottage, we drove through a field, which the driver told us was where Burns discovered the mouse's nest. It is the closest enclosure to the cottage and seems to be a pasture now, albeit a rather unproductive one. A little further on, the ground was covered with an enormous number of daisies—daisies, daisies everywhere; and in response to my question, the driver said this was the field where Burns plowed over the daisy. If that's the case, the soil seems to have been blessed with daisies by the song he wrote about that first immortal one. I got out and picked a whole handful of these "wee, modest, crimson-tipped flowers," which will be cherished by many friends back home as coming from Burns's farm, and being related to the same daisy that he turned into a timeless flower while appearing to destroy it.

From Moss Giel we drove through a variety of pleasant scenes, some of which were familiar to us by their connection with Burns. We skirted, too, along a portion of the estate of Auchinleck, which still belongs to the Boswell family,—the present possessor being Sir James Boswell [Sir James Boswell is now dead], a grandson of Johnson's friend, and son of the Sir Alexander who was killed in a duel. Our driver spoke of Sir James as a kind, free-hearted man, but addicted to horse-races and similar pastimes, and a little too familiar with the wine-cup; so that poor Bozzy's booziness would appear to have become hereditary in his ancient line. There is no male heir to the estate of Auchinleck. The portion of the lands which we saw is covered with wood and much undermined with rabbit-warrens; nor, though the territory extends over a large number of acres, is the income very considerable.

From Moss Giel, we drove through a variety of nice scenes, some of which were familiar to us because of their connection to Burns. We also passed by part of the Auchinleck estate, which still belongs to the Boswell family—the current owner is Sir James Boswell [Sir James Boswell is now dead], a grandson of Johnson's friend and the son of Sir Alexander, who was killed in a duel. Our driver described Sir James as a kind-hearted man, but prone to horse racing and similar activities, and a little too fond of drinking; it seems that poor Bozzy's booziness has run in the family. There is no male heir to the Auchinleck estate. The part of the land we saw is filled with woods and has many rabbit burrows, and even though the territory covers a vast number of acres, the income isn't very substantial.

By and by we came to the spot where Burns saw Miss Alexander, the Lass of Ballochmyle. It was on a bridge, which (or, more probably, a bridge that has succeeded to the old one, and is made of iron) crosses from bank to bank, high in air, over a deep gorge of the road; so that the young lady may have appeared to Burns like a creature between earth and sky, and compounded chiefly of celestial elements. But, in honest truth, the great charm of a woman, in Burns's eyes, was always her womanhood, and not the angelic mixture which other poets find in her.

Eventually, we arrived at the place where Burns saw Miss Alexander, the Lass of Ballochmyle. It was on a bridge, which is likely a more modern iron bridge that replaced the old one, spanning high above a deep gorge of the road. This may have made the young lady appear to Burns like a being caught between earth and sky, mostly made up of heavenly qualities. But, to be completely honest, the true appeal of a woman, in Burns's view, was always her womanhood, rather than the angelic blend that other poets see in her.

Our driver pointed out the course taken by the Lass of Ballochmyle, through the shrubbery, to a rock on the banks of the Lugar, where it seems to be the tradition that Burns accosted her. The song implies no such interview. Lovers, of whatever condition, high or low, could desire no lovelier scene in which to breathe their vows: the river flowing over its pebbly bed, sometimes gleaming into the sunshine, sometimes hidden deep in verdure, and here and there eddying at the foot of high and precipitous cliffs. This beautiful estate of Ballochmyle is still held by the family of Alexanders, to whom Burns's song has given renown on cheaper terms than any other set of people ever attained it. How slight the tenure seems! A young lady happened to walk out, one summer afternoon, and crossed the path of a neighboring farmer, who celebrated the little incident in four or five warm, rude, at least, not refined, though rather ambitious,—and somewhat ploughman-like verses. Burns has written hundreds of better things; but henceforth, for centuries, that maiden has free admittance into the dream-land of Beautiful Women, and she and all her race are famous. I should like to know the present head of the family, and ascertain what value, if any, the members of it put upon the celebrity thus won.

Our driver pointed out the path taken by the Lass of Ballochmyle, through the bushes, to a rock by the banks of the Lugar, where it’s said that Burns approached her. The song doesn’t suggest any such meeting. Lovers, no matter their status, could want no prettier setting to declare their love: the river flows over its stony bed, sometimes sparkling in the sunlight, sometimes shaded by greenery, and here and there swirling at the base of steep cliffs. This lovely estate of Ballochmyle is still owned by the Alexander family, who owe their fame to Burns's song for far less than anyone else ever did. It seems like such a small claim! One summer afternoon, a young woman happened to walk out and crossed paths with a local farmer, who celebrated the little encounter in four or five passionate, rough, certainly not polished but rather ambitious— and somewhat rustic verses. Burns has written hundreds of better pieces; however, from now on, for centuries to come, that maiden has free entry into the realm of Beautiful Women, and she and all her descendants are famous. I would love to know the current head of the family and find out what value, if any, they place on the fame they’ve gained.

We passed through Catrine, known hereabouts as "the clean village of Scotland." Certainly, as regards the point indicated, it has greatly the advantage of Mauchline, whither we now returned without seeing anything else worth writing about.

We went through Catrine, which is referred to locally as "the clean village of Scotland." In terms of cleanliness, it definitely has a significant advantage over Mauchline, where we returned without seeing anything else worth mentioning.

There was a rain-storm during the night, and, in the morning, the rusty, old, sloping street of Mauchline was glistening with wet, while frequent showers came spattering down. The intense heat of many days past was exchanged for a chilly atmosphere, much more suitable to a stranger's idea of what Scotch temperature ought to be. We found, after breakfast, that the first train northward had already gone by, and that we must wait till nearly two o'clock for the next. I merely ventured out once, during the forenoon, and took a brief walk through the village, in which I have left little to describe. Its chief business appears to be the manufacture of snuff-boxes. There are perhaps five or six shops, or more, including those licensed to sell only tea and tobacco; the best of them have the characteristics of village stores in the United States, dealing in a small way with an extensive variety of articles. I peeped into the open gateway of the churchyard, and saw that the ground was absolutely stuffed with dead people, and the surface crowded with gravestones, both perpendicular and horizontal. All Burns's old Mauchline acquaintance are doubtless there, and the Armours among them, except Bonny Jean, who sleeps by her poet's side. The family of Armour is now extinct in Mauchline.

There was a rainstorm during the night, and in the morning, the old, sloping street of Mauchline was shining with moisture, while frequent showers continued to fall. The intense heat of recent days was replaced by a chilly atmosphere, much closer to what a visitor might expect from Scottish weather. After breakfast, we discovered that the first train north had already passed, and we would have to wait until nearly two o'clock for the next one. I only decided to venture out once during the morning and took a quick walk through the village, which I have little to share about. Its main industry seems to be the production of snuff-boxes. There are probably five or six shops, or even more, including those that are licensed to sell only tea and tobacco; the best of them resemble village stores in the United States, offering a small selection of a wide variety of goods. I glanced into the open gate of the churchyard and saw that the ground was completely filled with graves, and the surface crowded with gravestones, both standing and flat. All of Burns's old acquaintances from Mauchline are surely buried there, along with the Armours, except for Bonny Jean, who rests beside her poet. The Armour family has now disappeared from Mauchline.

Arriving at the railway-station, we found a tall, elderly, comely gentleman walking to and fro and waiting for the train. He proved to be a Mr. Alexander,—it may fairly be presumed the Alexander of Ballochmyle, a blood relation of the lovely lass. Wonderful efficacy of a poet's verse, that could shed a glory from Long Ago on this old gentleman's white hair! These Alexanders, by the by, are not an old family on the Ballochmyle estate; the father of the lass having made a fortune in trade, and established himself as the first landed proprietor of his name in these parts. The original family was named Whitefoord.

Arriving at the train station, we found a tall, elderly, handsome gentleman walking back and forth, waiting for the train. He turned out to be Mr. Alexander—it’s fair to assume he’s the Alexander of Ballochmyle, a relative of the lovely girl. The amazing power of a poet's verse could cast a glow from Long Ago on this old gentleman's white hair! By the way, this Alexander family isn’t an old one on the Ballochmyle estate; the girl's father made a fortune in business and became the first landowner of his name in this area. The original family was called Whitefoord.

Our ride to Ayr presented nothing very remarkable; and, indeed, a cloudy and rainy day takes the varnish off the scenery and causes a woful diminution in the beauty and impressiveness of everything we see. Much of our way lay along a flat, sandy level, in a southerly direction. We reached Ayr in the midst of hopeless rain, and drove to the King's Arms Hotel. In the intervals of showers I took peeps at the town, which appeared to have many modern or modern-fronted edifices; although there are likewise tall, gray, gabled, and quaint-looking houses in the by-streets, here and there, betokening an ancient place. The town lies on both sides of the Ayr, which is here broad and stately, and bordered with dwellings that look from their windows directly down into the passing tide.

Our trip to Ayr wasn't very exciting; in fact, a cloudy and rainy day really dulls the scenery and greatly reduces the beauty and impact of everything we see. Much of our route was on a flat, sandy stretch heading south. We arrived in Ayr during a relentless rain and headed to the King's Arms Hotel. In between showers, I caught glimpses of the town, which seemed to have many modern or updated buildings; however, there were also tall, gray, gabled, and charming old houses in the side streets that hinted at its historic roots. The town is situated on both sides of the Ayr River, which here is wide and impressive, lined with homes that look directly out over the flowing water.

I crossed the river by a modern and handsome stone bridge, and recrossed it, at no great distance, by a venerable structure of four gray arches, which must have bestridden the stream ever since the early days of Scottish history. These are the "Two Briggs of Ayr," whose midnight conversation was overheard by Burns, while other auditors were aware only of the rush and rumble of the wintry stream among the arches. The ancient bridge is steep and narrow, and paved like a street, and defended by a parapet of red freestone, except at the two ends, where some mean old shops allow scanty room for the pathway to creep between. Nothing else impressed me hereabouts, unless I mention, that, during the rain, the women and girls went about the streets of Ayr barefooted to save their shoes.

I crossed the river on a modern, stylish stone bridge, then crossed back shortly after on an old structure with four gray arches, which must have spanned the stream since the early days of Scottish history. These are the "Two Briggs of Ayr," whose late-night conversation was overheard by Burns, while others only heard the rush and rumble of the wintry stream under the arches. The old bridge is steep and narrow, paved like a road, and has a red freestone parapet except at both ends, where a few shabby old shops leave just enough space for the pathway to squeeze through. Nothing else caught my attention around here, except to note that during the rain, women and girls walked the streets of Ayr barefoot to protect their shoes.

The next morning wore a lowering aspect, as if it felt itself destined to be one of many consecutive days of storm. After a good Scotch breakfast, however, of fresh herrings and eggs, we took a fly, and started at a little past ten for the banks of the Doon. On our way, at about two miles from Ayr, we drew up at a roadside cottage, on which was an inscription to the effect that Robert Burns was born within its walls. It is now a public-house; and, of course, we alighted and entered its little sitting-room, which, as we at present see it, is a neat apartment, with the modern improvement of a ceiling. The walls are much overscribbled with names of visitors, and the wooden door of a cupboard in the wainscot, as well as all the other wood-work of the room, is cut and carved with initial letters. So, likewise, are two tables, which, having received a coat of varnish over the inscriptions, form really curious and interesting articles of furniture. I have seldom (though I do not, personally adopt this mode of illustrating my bumble name) felt inclined to ridicule the natural impulse of most people thus to record themselves at the shrines of poets and heroes.

The next morning had a gloomy feel, as if it knew it would be just another in a long string of stormy days. After a hearty Scottish breakfast of fresh herring and eggs, we set out a little after ten for the banks of the Doon. On our way, about two miles from Ayr, we stopped at a roadside cottage, which had an inscription stating that Robert Burns was born there. It’s now a pub, so we got out and entered its small sitting room, which, as we see it now, is a tidy space with the modern touch of a ceiling. The walls are covered with names of visitors, and the wooden door of a cupboard in the wainscoting, along with the rest of the woodwork in the room, is etched and carved with initials. Two tables also carry these carvings, and after being varnished over, they have become quite unique and interesting pieces of furniture. I have seldom (though I don't personally choose to illustrate my humble name this way) felt inclined to mock the natural impulse of most people to record their presence at the shrines of poets and heroes.

On a panel, let into the wall in a corner of the room, is a portrait of Burns, copied from the original picture by Nasmyth. The floor of this apartment is of boards, which are probably a recent substitute for the ordinary flag-stones of a peasant's cottage. There is but one other room pertaining to the genuine birthplace of Robert Burns: it is the kitchen, into which we now went. It has a floor of flag-stones, even ruder than those of Shakespeare's house,—though, perhaps, not so strangely cracked and broken as the latter, over which the hoof of Satan himself might seem to have been trampling. A new window has been opened through the wall, towards the road; but on the opposite side is the little original window, of only four small panes, through which came the first daylight that shone upon the Scottish poet. At the side of the room, opposite the fireplace, is a recess, containing a bed, which can be hidden by curtains. In that humble nook, of all places in the world, Providence was pleased to deposit the germ of the richest, human life which mankind then had within its circumference.

On a panel set into the wall in a corner of the room is a portrait of Burns, based on the original picture by Nasmyth. The floor of this room is made of boards, which are likely a recent replacement for the typical flagstones found in a peasant's cottage. There is only one other room that belongs to the true birthplace of Robert Burns: the kitchen, which we are now entering. It has a floor of flagstones that are even rougher than those in Shakespeare's house—though, perhaps, not as oddly cracked and broken as the latter, over which the hoof of Satan himself might seem to have trampled. A new window has been cut into the wall facing the road, but on the opposite side is the original small window, with just four tiny panes, through which the first light of day shone upon the Scottish poet. On the side of the room opposite the fireplace is a nook with a bed that can be concealed by curtains. In that humble corner, of all places in the world, Providence chose to place the seed of the richest human life that existed at the time.

These two rooms, as I have said, make up the whole sum and substance of Burns's birthplace: for there were no chambers, nor even attics; and the thatched roof formed the only ceiling of kitchen and sitting-room, the height of which was that of the whole house. The cottage, however, is attached to another edifice of the same size and description, as these little habitations often are; and, moreover, a splendid addition has been made to it, since the poet's renown began to draw visitors to the wayside alehouse. The old woman of the house led us through an entry, and showed a vaulted hall, of no vast dimensions, to be sure, but marvellously large and splendid as compared with what might be anticipated from the outward aspect of the cottage. It contained a bust of Burns, and was hung round with pictures and engravings, principally illustrative of his life and poems. In this part of the house, too, there is a parlor, fragrant with tobacco-smoke; and, no doubt, many a noggin of whiskey is here quaffed to the memory of the bard, who professed to draw so much inspiration from that potent liquor.

These two rooms, as I mentioned, make up the entire essence of Burns's birthplace: there were no other rooms, not even attics; and the thatched roof served as the only ceiling for the kitchen and sitting room, which had the height of the whole house. However, the cottage is connected to another building of the same size and type, as these small homes often are; additionally, a beautiful extension has been added since the poet's fame began attracting visitors to the roadside pub. The elderly woman of the house guided us through an entryway and showed us a vaulted hall, which, although not very large, was surprisingly spacious and impressive compared to what one might expect from the exterior of the cottage. It featured a bust of Burns and was adorned with pictures and engravings, mainly illustrating his life and poems. In this part of the house, there is also a parlor, filled with the scent of tobacco smoke; and undoubtedly, many a drink of whiskey is enjoyed here in memory of the bard, who claimed to find so much inspiration from that powerful liquor.

We bought some engravings of Kirk Alloway, the Bridge of Doon, and the monument, and gave the old woman a fee besides, and took our leave. A very short drive farther brought us within sight of the monument, and to the hotel, situated close by the entrance of the ornamental grounds within which the former is enclosed. We rang the bell at the gate of the enclosure, but were forced to wait a considerable time; because the old man, the regular superintendent of the spot, had gone to assist at the laying of the corner-stone of a new kirk. He appeared anon, and admitted us, but immediately hurried away to be present at the concluding ceremonies, leaving us locked up with Burns.

We bought some engravings of Kirk Alloway, the Bridge of Doon, and the monument, and gave the old woman a tip as well, and then we said our goodbyes. A short drive later, we could see the monument and arrived at the hotel, which is located right by the entrance to the beautiful grounds where the monument is situated. We rang the bell at the gate, but had to wait quite a while because the old man, the usual caretaker of the area, had gone to help with the laying of the corner-stone for a new church. He showed up after a bit, let us in, but quickly rushed off to attend the final ceremonies, leaving us alone with Burns.

The enclosure around the monument is beautifully laid out as an ornamental garden, and abundantly provided with rare flowers and shrubbery, all tended with loving care. The monument stands on an elevated site, and consists of a massive basement-story, three-sided, above which rises a light and elegant Grecian temple,—a mere dome, supported on Corinthian pillars, and open to all the winds. The edifice is beautiful in itself; though I know not what peculiar appropriateness it may have, as the memorial of a Scottish rural poet.

The area surrounding the monument is beautifully designed as an ornamental garden, filled with rare flowers and shrubs, all lovingly cared for. The monument is situated on a raised spot and features a large three-sided base, topped by a light and elegant Grecian temple—a simple dome supported by Corinthian columns and open to the breeze. The structure is stunning on its own; however, I’m not sure how fitting it is as a tribute to a Scottish rural poet.

The door of the basement-story stood open; and, entering, we saw a bust of Burns in a niche, looking keener, more refined, but not so warm and whole-souled as his pictures usually do. I think the likeness cannot be good. In the centre of the room stood a glass case, in which were reposited the two volumes of the little Pocket Bible that Burns gave to Highland Mary, when they pledged their troth to one another. It is poorly printed, on coarse paper. A verse of Scripture, referring to the solemnity and awfulness of vows, is written within the cover of each volume, in the poet's own hand; and fastened to one of the covers is a lock of Highland Mary's golden hair. This Bible had been carried to America—by one of her relatives, but was sent back to be fitly treasured here.

The basement door was open, and when we walked in, we saw a bust of Burns in a niche. It looked sharper and more refined, but not as warm and genuine as his pictures usually appear. I don't think it captures his likeness well. In the center of the room was a glass case holding the two volumes of the little Pocket Bible that Burns gave to Highland Mary when they made their vows to each other. The printing is poor, on rough paper. Inside the cover of each volume, a verse of Scripture about the seriousness and gravity of vows is written in the poet's own handwriting, and attached to one of the covers is a lock of Highland Mary's golden hair. This Bible was taken to America by one of her relatives, but it was sent back to be properly cherished here.

There is a staircase within the monument, by which we ascended to the top, and had a view of both Briggs of Doon; the scene of Tam O'Shanter's misadventure being close at hand. Descending, we wandered through the enclosed garden, and came to a little building in a corner, on entering which, we found the two statues of Tam and Sutor Wat,—ponderous stone-work enough, yet permeated in a remarkable degree with living warmth and jovial hilarity. From this part of the garden, too, we again beheld the old Brigg of Doon, over which Tam galloped in such imminent and awful peril. It is a beautiful object in the landscape, with one high, graceful arch, ivy-grown, and shadowed all over and around with foliage.

There’s a staircase inside the monument, which we climbed to the top, where we had a view of both Briggs of Doon; the spot where Tam O'Shanter had his mishap was nearby. Going back down, we strolled through the enclosed garden and came across a small building in a corner. When we entered, we discovered the two statues of Tam and Sutor Wat—solid stone figures that still managed to feel lively and cheerful. From this part of the garden, we also saw the old Brigg of Doon again, the very bridge Tam rode over in such grave danger. It’s a lovely sight in the landscape, with a tall, elegant arch, covered in ivy and surrounded by lush greenery.

When we had waited a good while, the old gardener came, telling us that he had heard an excellent prayer at laying the corner-stone of the new kirk. He now gave us some roses and sweetbrier, and let us out from his pleasant garden. We immediately hastened to Kirk Alloway, which is within two or three minutes' walk of the monument. A few steps ascend from the roadside, through a gate, into the old graveyard, in the midst of which stands the kirk. The edifice is wholly roofless, but the side-walls and gable-ends are quite entire, though portions of them are evidently modern restorations. Never was there a plainer little church, or one with smaller architectural pretension; no New England meeting-house has more simplicity in its very self, though poetry and fun have clambered and clustered so wildly over Kirk Alloway that it is difficult to see it as it actually exists. By the by, I do not understand why Satan and an assembly of witches should hold their revels within a consecrated precinct; but the weird scene has so established itself in the world's imaginative faith that it must be accepted as an authentic incident, in spite of rule and reason to the contrary. Possibly, some carnal minister, some priest of pious aspect and hidden infidelity, had dispelled the consecration of the holy edifice by his pretence of prayer, and thus made it the resort of unhappy ghosts and sorcerers and devils.

After waiting for a while, the old gardener came to us and said he had heard a great prayer at the laying of the corner-stone for the new church. He then gave us some roses and sweetbriar and let us out of his beautiful garden. We quickly made our way to Kirk Alloway, which is just a two or three-minute walk from the monument. A few steps lead up from the roadside, through a gate, into the old graveyard, where the church stands in the middle. The building is completely roofless, but the sidewalls and gable ends are mostly intact, although some parts are clearly modern restorations. There has never been a simpler little church, or one with less architectural ambition; no New England meeting house is simpler in its essence, though poetry and humor have piled up around Kirk Alloway so much that it’s hard to see it as it really is. By the way, I don’t get why Satan and a group of witches would celebrate their gatherings in a consecrated place; however, the strange scene has become so ingrained in the world's imagination that it has to be accepted as a true event, despite logic and reason suggesting otherwise. Perhaps some worldly minister, a priest with a pious look but hidden doubts, ruined the sanctity of the holy building with his phony prayer, turning it into a haunt for lost souls, sorcerers, and devils.

The interior of the kirk, even now, is applied to quite as impertinent a purpose as when Satan and the witches used it as a dancing-hall; for it is divided in the midst by a wall of stone-masonry, and each compartment has been converted into a family burial-place. The name on one of the monuments is Crawfurd; the other bore no inscription. It is impossible not to feel that these good people, whoever they may be, had no business to thrust their prosaic bones into a spot that belongs to the world, and where their presence jars with the emotions, be they sad or gay, which the pilgrim brings thither. They slant us out from our own precincts, too,—from that inalienable possession which Burns bestowed in free gift upon mankind, by taking it from the actual earth and annexing it to the domain of imagination. And here these wretched squatters have lain down to their long sleep, after barring each of the two doorways of the kirk with an iron grate! May their rest be troubled, till they rise and let us in!

The inside of the church, even now, is used for just as annoying a purpose as when Satan and the witches used it as a dance hall; it’s divided in the middle by a stone wall, and each section has been turned into a family burial site. One of the graves is marked with the name Crawfurd; the other has no inscription. It’s hard not to feel that these people, whoever they are, had no right to shove their ordinary remains into a place that belongs to the world, where their presence clashes with the emotions—whether sad or happy—that visitors bring with them. They also push us out from our own space—from that inalienable gift Burns gave to humanity, by taking it from the actual earth and attaching it to the realm of imagination. And here these unfortunate squatters have settled down for their long sleep, after blocking both entrances of the church with iron grates! May their rest be disturbed until they rise and let us in!

Kirk Alloway is inconceivably small, considering how large a space it fills in our imagination before we see it. I paced its length, outside of the wall, and found it only seventeen of my paces, and not more than ten of them in breadth. There seem to have been but very few windows, all of which, if I rightly remember, are now blocked up with mason-work of stone. One mullioned window, tall and narrow, in the eastern gable, might have been seen by Tam O'Shanter, blazing with devilish light, as he approached along the road from Ayr; and there is a small and square one, on the side nearest the road, into which he might have peered, as he sat on horseback. Indeed, I could easily have looked through it, standing on the ground, had not the opening been walled up. There is an odd kind of belfry at the peak of one of the gables, with the small bell still hanging in it. And this is all that I remember of Kirk Alloway, except that the stones of its material are gray and irregular.

Kirk Alloway is surprisingly small, given how big it seems in our minds before we actually see it. I walked its length along the outside wall and found it was only seventeen of my paces long and no more than ten wide. There seem to have been only a few windows, all of which, if I remember correctly, are now blocked up with stonework. One tall, narrow window in the eastern gable could have been seen by Tam O'Shanter, glowing with a devilish light as he came down the road from Ayr; and there's a small square window on the side closest to the road that he might have peeked through while sitting on his horse. I could have easily looked through it from the ground if it hadn't been bricked up. There's a strange little belfry at the top of one of the gables, with a small bell still hanging in it. And that's all I remember about Kirk Alloway, except that the stones are gray and uneven.

The road from Ayr passes Alloway Kirk, and crosses the Doon by a modern bridge, without swerving much from a straight line. To reach the old bridge, it appears to have made a bend, shortly after passing the kirk, and then to have turned sharply towards the river. The new bridge is within a minute's walk of the monument; and we went thither, and leaned over its parapet to admire the beautiful Doon, flowing wildly and sweetly between its deep and wooded banks. I never saw a lovelier scene; although this might have been even lovelier, if a kindly sun had shone upon it. The ivy-grown, ancient bridge, with its high arch, through which we had a picture of the river and the green banks beyond, was absolutely the most picturesque object, in a quiet and gentle way, that ever blessed my eyes. Bonny Doon, with its wooded banks, and the boughs dipping into the water!

The road from Ayr goes past Alloway Kirk and crosses the Doon by a modern bridge, mostly staying in a straight line. To reach the old bridge, it looks like it took a bend just after passing the kirk, then turned sharply towards the river. The new bridge is just a minute's walk from the monument; we went there and leaned over the railing to admire the beautiful Doon, flowing wildly and sweetly between its deep, wooded banks. I’ve never seen a lovelier scene; although it could have been even more beautiful if the sun had been shining. The ivy-covered, ancient bridge, with its high arch, offered a stunning view of the river and the green banks beyond—it was by far the most picturesque sight I’ve ever seen, in a calm and gentle way. Bonny Doon, with its wooded banks and branches dipping into the water!

The memory of them, at this moment, affects me like the song of birds, and Burns crooning some verses, simple and wild, in accordance with their native melody.

The memory of them, right now, hits me like the song of birds, with Burns singing some verses, simple and wild, in tune with their natural melody.

It was impossible to depart without crossing the very bridge of Tam's adventure; so we went thither, over a now disused portion of the road, and, standing on the centre of the arch, gathered some ivy-leaves from that sacred spot. This done, we returned as speedily as might be to Ayr, whence, taking the rail, we soon beheld Ailsa Craig rising like a pyramid out of the sea. Drawing nearer to Glasgow, Bell Lomond hove in sight, with a dome-like summit, supported by a shoulder on each side. But a man is better than a mountain; and we had been holding intercourse, if not with the reality, at least with the stalwart ghost of one of Earth's memorable sons, amid the scenes where he lived and sung. We shall appreciate him better as a poet, hereafter; for there is no writer whose life, as a man, has so much to do with his fame, and throws such a necessary light, upon whatever he has produced. Henceforth, there will be a personal warmth for us in everything that he wrote; and, like his countrymen, we shall know him in a kind of personal way, as if we had shaken hands with him, and felt the thrill of his actual voice.

It was impossible to leave without crossing the very bridge of Tam's adventure, so we headed there, over a now unused part of the road, and, standing at the center of the arch, collected some ivy leaves from that special place. Once we did that, we quickly returned to Ayr, where we took the train and soon saw Ailsa Craig rising like a pyramid out of the sea. As we drew closer to Glasgow, Ben Lomond came into view, with its dome-shaped peak, supported by shoulders on each side. But a person is more important than a mountain; and we had been connecting, if not with the man himself, at least with the strong spirit of one of Earth's memorable figures, in the places where he lived and sang. We will appreciate him more as a poet later; because no writer's life as a person is so intertwined with their fame, shedding necessary light on everything they've created. From now on, there will be a personal warmth in everything he wrote for us; and, like his fellow countrymen, we will feel like we know him personally, as if we had shaken hands with him and felt the thrill of his actual voice.





A LONDON SUBURB.

One of our English summers looks, in the retrospect, as if it had been patched with more frequent sunshine than the sky of England ordinarily affords; but I believe that it may be only a moral effect,—a "light that never was on sea nor land," caused by our having found a particularly delightful abode in the neighborhood of London. In order to enjoy it, however, I was compelled to solve the problem of living in two places at once,—an impossibility which I so far accomplished as to vanish, at frequent intervals, out of men's sight and knowledge on one side of England, and take my place in a circle of familiar faces on the other, so quietly that I seemed to have been there all along. It was the easier to get accustomed to our new residence, because it was not only rich in all the material properties of a home, but had also the home-like atmosphere, the household element, which is of too intangible a character to be let even with the most thoroughly furnished lodging-house. A friend had given us his suburban residence, with all its conveniences, elegances, and snuggeries,—its drawing-rooms and library, still warm and bright with the recollection of the genial presences that we had known there,— its closets, chambers, kitchen, and even its wine-cellar, if we could have availed ourselves of so dear and delicate a trust,—its lawn and cosey garden-nooks, and whatever else makes up the multitudinous idea of an English home,—he had transferred it all to us, pilgrims and dusty wayfarers, that we might rest and take our ease during his summer's absence on the Continent. We had long been dwelling in tents, as it were, and morally shivering by hearths which, heap the bituminous coal upon them as we might, no blaze could render cheerful. I remember, to this day, the dreary feeling with which I sat by our first English fireside, and watched the chill and rainy twilight of an autumn day darkening down upon the garden; while the portrait of the preceding occupant of the house (evidently a most unamiable personage in his lifetime) scowled inhospitably from above the mantel-piece, as if indignant that an American should try to make himself at home there. Possibly it may appease his sulky shade to know that I quitted his abode as much a stranger as I entered it. But mow, at last, we were in a genuine British home, where refined and warm-hearted people had just been living their daily life, and had left us a summer's inheritance of slowly ripened days, such as a stranger's hasty opportunities so seldom permit him to enjoy.

One of our English summers, looking back, seems to have had more sunshine than England usually provides; but I think it might just be a psychological effect—a "light that never was on sea nor land," caused by our finding a wonderfully pleasant place near London. To enjoy it, though, I had to figure out how to live in two places at once—an impossible task that I managed by frequently disappearing from one side of England, only to quietly join a circle of familiar faces on the other, as if I had been there all along. It was easier to get used to our new home because it was not only full of all the material comforts of a home, but it also had that cozy, welcoming atmosphere that you can’t really get from even the best-furnished rental. A friend had lent us his suburban house, complete with all its conveniences, elegance, and cozy spots—its living rooms and library, still warm with memories of the wonderful people who had been there before us—its closets, bedrooms, kitchen, and even a wine cellar, if we had dared to indulge in such a precious trust—its lawn and inviting garden corners, and everything else that creates the rich idea of an English home. He had given it all to us, weary travelers, so we could relax and enjoy ourselves during his summer trip to the Continent. We had been living out of suitcases, so to speak, and feeling cold by fires that, no matter how much coal we piled on, never seemed inviting. I still remember the dreary feeling of sitting by our first English fireplace, watching the cold, rainy twilight of an autumn day settle over the garden, while the portrait of the house’s previous occupant (clearly not a very friendly person in life) glared down at us from above the mantelpiece, as if angry that an American would dare to make himself comfortable there. Perhaps it might please his gloomy spirit to know that I left his home as much of a stranger as I entered it. But now, at last, we were in a true British home, where gracious and warm-hearted people had just been living their everyday lives, leaving us a summer’s worth of beautifully mellow days, which a traveler rarely gets to enjoy.

Within so trifling a distance of the central spot of all the world (which, as Americans have at present no centre of their own, we may allow to be somewhere in the vicinity, we will say, of St. Paul's Cathedral), it might have seemed natural that I should be tossed about by the turbulence of the vast London whirlpool. But I had drifted into a still eddy, where conflicting movements made a repose, and, wearied with a good deal of uncongenial activity, I found the quiet of my temporary haven more attractive than anything that the great town could offer. I already knew London well; that is to say, I had long ago satisfied (so far as it was capable of satisfaction) that mysterious yearning—the magnetism of millions of hearts operating upon one—which impels every man's individuality to mingle itself with the immensest mass of human life within his scope. Day alter day, at an earlier period, I had trodden the thronged thoroughfares, the broad, lonely squares, the lanes, alleys, and strange labyrinthine courts, the parks, the gardens and enclosures of ancient studious societies, so retired and silent amid the city uproar, the markets, the foggy streets along the river-side, the bridges,—I had sought all parts of the metropolis, in short, with an unweariable and indiscriminating curiosity; until few of the native inhabitants, I fancy, had turned so many of its corners as myself. These aimless wanderings (in which my prime purpose and achievement were to lose my way, and so to find it the more surely) had brought one, at one time or another, to the sight and actual presence of almost all the objects and renowned localities that I had read about, and which had made London the dream-city of my youth. I had found it better than my dream; for there is nothing else in life comparable (in that species of enjoyment, I mean) to the thick, heavy, oppressive, sombre delight which an American is sensible of, hardly knowing whether to call it a pleasure or a pain, in the atmosphere of London. The result was, that I acquired a home-feeling there, as nowhere else in the world,—though afterwards I came to have a somewhat similar sentiment in regard to Rome; and as long as either of those two great cities shall exist, the cities of the Past and of the Present, a man's native soil may crumble beneath his feet without leaving him altogether homeless upon earth.

Within such a small distance from the center of the world (which, since Americans don’t have a center of their own, we can say is somewhere near St. Paul's Cathedral), it might have seemed natural that I would be swept up in the chaos of the vast London whirlwind. But I had found myself in a calm spot, where the conflicting movements created a sense of peace, and, tired of a lot of unfulfilling activity, I found the tranquility of my temporary refuge much more appealing than anything the big city could provide. I already knew London well; in other words, I had long ago satisfied (as much as it could be satisfied) that mysterious yearning—the pull of millions of hearts influencing one individual—which drives every person to blend their uniqueness with the immense mass of human life around them. Day after day, earlier on, I had walked through the crowded streets, the wide, empty squares, the narrow lanes, alleys, and strange winding courts, the parks, the gardens, and secluded areas of ancient scholarly societies, so quiet and still amidst the city's noise, the markets, the foggy streets by the river, the bridges—I had explored all parts of the metropolis, basically, with an endless and indiscriminate curiosity; until I doubt many of the local residents had turned as many corners as I had. These aimless wanderings (where my main goal and achievement were to get lost and then find my way back again) had led me, at one point or another, to see and be in almost all the remarkable sights and places I had read about, which had turned London into the dream city of my youth. I discovered it was better than my dream; because there’s nothing else in life that compares (in that kind of enjoyment, I mean) to the thick, heavy, oppressive, dark pleasure that an American feels, hardly knowing whether to call it joy or pain, in the atmosphere of London. As a result, I developed a sense of belonging there like nowhere else in the world—even though later I found a somewhat similar feeling towards Rome; and as long as either of those two great cities exist, the cities of the Past and of the Present, a man’s homeland may crumble beneath him without leaving him completely homeless on this earth.

Thus, having once fully yielded to its influence, I was in a manner free of the city, and could approach or keep away from it as I pleased. Hence it happened, that, living within a quarter of an hour's rush of the London Bridge Terminus, I was oftener tempted to spend a whole summer-day in our garden than to seek anything new or old, wonderful or commonplace, beyond its precincts. It was a delightful garden, of no great extent, but comprising a good many facilities for repose and enjoyment, such as arbors and garden-seats, shrubbery, flower-beds, rose-bushes in a profusion of bloom, pinks, poppies, geraniums, sweet-peas, and a variety of other scarlet, yellow, blue, and purple blossoms, which I did not trouble myself to recognize individually, yet had always a vague sense of their beauty about me. The dim sky of England has a most happy effect on the coloring of flowers, blending richness with delicacy in the same texture; but in this garden, as everywhere else, the exuberance of English verdure had a greater charm than any tropical splendor or diversity of hue. The hunger for natural beauty might be satisfied with grass and green leaves forever. Conscious of the triumph of England in this respect, and loyally anxious for the credit of my own country, it gratified me to observe what trouble and pains the English gardeners are fain to throw away in producing a few sour plums and abortive pears and apples,—as, for example, in this very garden, where a row of unhappy trees were spread out perfectly flat against a brick wall, looking as if impaled alive, or crucified, with a cruel and unattainable purpose of compelling them to produce rich fruit by torture. For my part, I never ate an English fruit, raised in the open air, that could compare in flavor with a Yankee turnip.

Once I completely surrendered to its charm, I found myself free from the city and could visit or avoid it whenever I wanted. So, even though I lived just a quick fifteen-minute rush from London Bridge, I often felt more tempted to spend an entire summer day in our garden than to explore anything new or old, amazing or ordinary, outside its borders. It was a lovely garden, not very big, but it had plenty of spots for relaxation and enjoyment, like arbors and benches, shrubbery, flower beds, and an abundance of blooming rose bushes, pinks, poppies, geraniums, sweet peas, and a variety of other red, yellow, blue, and purple flowers that I didn't bother to identify individually, yet their beauty always surrounded me. The gray sky of England creates a wonderful effect on flower colors, blending richness with delicacy in a single texture; but in this garden, as in all of England, the lush greenery had a greater appeal than any tropical splendor or color variation. The desire for natural beauty could easily be satisfied with grass and green leaves forever. Proud of England's success in this area, and eager to support my own country's reputation, I found it amusing to see how much trouble and effort English gardeners went through to grow a few sour plums and underdeveloped pears and apples—like in this garden, where a line of unfortunate trees were spread flat against a brick wall, looking as if they were stuck there, suffering, with a cruel and impossible goal of forcing them to bear rich fruit through pain. Personally, I've never eaten an English fruit grown outdoors that could match the taste of a good old Yankee turnip.

The garden included that prime feature of English domestic scenery, a lawn. It had been levelled, carefully shorn, and converted into a bowling-green, on which we sometimes essayed to practise the time-honored game of bowls, most unskilfully, yet not without a perception that it involves a very pleasant mixture of exercise and ease, as is the case with most of the old English pastimes. Our little domain was shut in by the house on one side, and in other directions by a hedge-fence and a brick wall, which last was concealed or softened by shrubbery and the impaled fruit-trees already mentioned. Over all the outer region, beyond our immediate precincts, there was an abundance of foliage, tossed aloft from the near or distant trees with which that agreeable suburb is adorned. The effect was wonderfully sylvan and rural, insomuch that we might have fancied ourselves in the depths of a wooded seclusion; only that, at brief intervals, we could hear the galloping sweep of a railway-train passing within a quarter of a mile, and its discordant screech, moderated by a little farther distance, as it reached the Blackheath Station. That harsh, rough sound, seeking me out so inevitably, was the voice of the great world summoning me forth. I know not whether I was the more pained or pleased to be thus constantly put in mind of the neighborhood of London; for, on the one hand, my conscience stung me a little for reading a book, or playing with children in the grass, when there were so many better things for an enlightened traveller to do,—while, at the same time, it gave a deeper delight to my luxurious idleness, to contrast it with the turmoil which I escaped. On the whole, however, I do not repent of a single wasted hour, and only wish that I could have spent twice as many in the same way; for the impression on my memory is, that I was as happy in that hospitable garden as the English summer-day was long.

The garden featured that quintessential element of English home scenery, a lawn. It had been leveled, neatly mowed, and turned into a bowling green, where we sometimes attempted to practice the classic game of bowls, most clumsily, yet not without realizing that it offers a lovely blend of exercise and relaxation, just like most traditional English pastimes. Our little space was bordered by the house on one side, and by a hedge and a brick wall on the other, the latter being softened by the shrubs and the fruit trees we had mentioned earlier. Beyond our immediate area, there was a wealth of foliage, lifted high by the nearby and distant trees that decorated that pleasant suburb. The effect was wonderfully forest-like and rural, to the point where we could have imagined ourselves deep in a wooded retreat; only that, at brief intervals, we could hear the rush of a train passing within a quarter of a mile, along with its jarring screech, softened by a little distance, as it reached the Blackheath Station. That harsh, rough sound, constantly calling to me, was the voice of the larger world beckoning me out. I’m not sure whether I felt more pained or pleased to be repeatedly reminded of London’s proximity; on one hand, my conscience pricked me a bit for reading a book or playing with kids in the grass when there were so many more worthwhile activities for a traveler to pursue—while on the other hand, it also heightened my enjoyment of my luxurious idleness, contrasting it with the chaos I was escaping. Overall, however, I don’t regret a single hour spent this way, and I wish I could have spent twice as many in the same manner, for my memory tells me that I was as happy in that welcoming garden as the English summer day was long.

One chief condition of my enjoyment was the weather. Italy has nothing like it, nor America. There never was such weather except in England, where, in requital of a vast amount of horrible east-wind between February and June, and a brown October and black November, and a wet, chill, sunless winter, there are a few weeks of incomparable summer, scattered through July and August, and the earlier portion of September, small in quantity, but exquisite enough to atone for the whole year's atmospherical delinquencies. After all, the prevalent sombreness may have brought out those sunny intervals in such high relief, that I see them, in my recollection, brighter than they really were: a little light makes a glory for people who live habitually in a gray gloom. The English, however, do not seem to know how enjoyable the momentary gleams of their summer are; they call it broiling weather, and hurry to the seaside with red, perspiring faces, in a state of combustion and deliquescence; and I have observed that even their cattle have similar susceptibilities, seeking the deepest shade, or standing midleg deep in pools and streams to cool themselves, at temperatures which our own cows would deem little more than barely comfortable. To myself, after the summer heats of my native land had somewhat effervesced out of my blood and memory, it was the weather of Paradise itself. It might be a little too warm; but it was that modest and inestimable superabundance which constitutes a bounty of Providence, instead of just a niggardly enough. During my first year in England, residing in perhaps the most ungenial part of the kingdom, I could never be quite comfortable without a fire on the hearth; in the second twelvemonth, beginning to get acclimatized, I became sensible of an austere friendliness, shy, but sometimes almost tender, in the veiled, shadowy, seldom smiling summer; and in the succeeding years,—whether that I had renewed my fibre with English beef and replenished my blood with English ale, or whatever were the cause,—I grew content with winter and especially in love with summer, desiring little more for happiness than merely to breathe and bask. At the midsummer which we are now speaking of, I must needs confess that the noontide sun came down more fervently than I found altogether tolerable; so that I was fain to shift my position with the shadow of the shrubbery, making myself the movable index of a sundial that reckoned up the hours of an almost interminable day.

One main thing that made me enjoy my time was the weather. Italy doesn’t have anything like it, nor does America. There was never such weather except in England, where, in return for a lot of awful east winds from February to June, a dreary October and dark November, and a damp, cold, sunless winter, you get a few weeks of amazing summer scattered throughout July and August, and the earlier part of September—small in amount, but exquisite enough to make up for the whole year's atmospheric disappointments. After all, the constant gloom might have made those sunny spells stand out so much that in my memory, they appear brighter than they actually were: a little light creates a sense of glory for those living regularly in a gray haze. However, the English don’t seem to appreciate how delightful those brief bursts of summer are; they call it sweltering weather and rush to the coast with flushed, sweaty faces, in a state of distress. I’ve even noticed that their cattle show similar reactions, seeking the deepest shade or standing mid-leg deep in pools and streams to cool off, at temperatures that our cows would find barely comfortable. To me, after the summer heat of my homeland had faded from my blood and memory, it felt like the weather of Paradise itself. It might be a bit too warm, but it was that moderate and priceless abundance that represents a blessing from above, rather than just a stingy amount. During my first year in England, living in perhaps the least welcoming part of the country, I could never quite feel comfortable without a fire in the hearth; in the second year, as I began to acclimate, I started to notice a kind of austere warmth—shy but sometimes almost gentle—in the shadowy, rarely bright summer; and in the following years—whether because I had strengthened my body with English beef and filled my blood with English ale, or for some other reason—I became content with winter and especially fell in love with summer, longing for nothing more to be happy than simply to breathe and soak up the sun. In the midsummer we’re talking about now, I have to admit that the midday sun was more intense than I found entirely bearable; so I had to shift my spot into the shade of the bushes, making myself the moving shadow of a sundial that marked the hours of an almost endless day.

For each day seemed endless, though never wearisome. As far as your actual experience is concerned, the English summer-day has positively no beginning and no end. When you awake, at any reasonable hour, the sun is already shining through the curtains; you live through unnumbered hours of Sabbath quietude, with a calm variety of incident softly etched upon their tranquil lapse; and at length you become conscious that it is bedtime again, while there is still enough daylight in the sky to make the pages of your book distinctly legible. Night, if there be any such season, hangs down a transparent veil through which the bygone day beholds its successor; or, if not quite true of the latitude of London, it may be soberly affirmed of the more northern parts of the island, that To-morrow is born before its Yesterday is dead. They exist together in the golden twilight, where the decrepit old day dimly discerns the face of the ominous infant; and you, though a more mortal, may simultaneously touch them both with one finger of recollection and another of prophecy. I cared not how long the day might be, nor how many of them. I had earned this repose by a long course of irksome toil and perturbation, and could have been content never to stray out of the limits of that suburban villa and its garden. If I lacked anything beyond, it would have satisfied me well enough to dream about it, instead of struggling for its actual possession. At least, this was the feeling of the moment; although the transitory, flitting, and irresponsible character of my life there was perhaps the most enjoyable element of all, as allowing me much of the comfort of house and home without any sense of their weight upon my back. The nomadic life has great advantages, if we can find tents ready pitched for us at every stage.

Each day felt infinite, yet never tiring. From your perspective, an English summer day truly has no beginning or end. When you wake up at a reasonable hour, the sun is already shining through the curtains; you experience countless hours of peaceful rest, with a subtle variety of events lightly marking their gentle flow. Eventually, you realize it's bedtime again, while there's still enough daylight to clearly read the pages of your book. Night, if it can be called that, drapes a sheer veil through which the previous day sees its successor; or, though this might not be completely true for London, it's safe to say that in the more northern areas of the island, Tomorrow is born before Yesterday can fade away. They coexist in the golden twilight, where the fading old day vaguely recognizes the face of the impending new one; and you, though just human, can touch them both at once with one finger of memory and another of anticipation. I didn't care how long the day might last, or how many days there would be. I had earned this rest after a long period of tedious work and anxiety, and I would have been happy never to leave the confines of that suburban house and its garden. If I desired anything more, dreaming about it would have been enough for me, rather than fighting for its actual attainment. At least, that was how I felt at the moment; although the fleeting, unsteady nature of my life there was perhaps the most enjoyable part, as it allowed me much of the comfort of a home without the burden of it weighing me down. The nomadic lifestyle has many benefits, as long as we can find tents set up for us at every stop.

So much for the interior of our abode,—a spot of deepest quiet, within reach of the intensest activity. But, even when we stopped beyond our own gate, we were not shocked with any immediate presence of the great world. We were dwelling in one of those oases that have grown up (in comparatively recent years, I believe) on the wide waste of Blackheath, which otherwise offers a vast extent of unoccupied ground in singular proximity to the metropolis. As a general thing, the proprietorship of the soil seems to exist in everybody and nobody; but exclusive rights have been obtained, here and there, chiefly by men whose daily concerns link them with London, so that you find their villas or boxes standing along village streets which have often more of an American aspect than the elder English settlements. The scene is semi-rural. Ornamental trees overshadow the sidewalks, and grassy margins border the wheel-tracks. The houses, to be sure, have certain points of difference from those of an American village, bearing tokens of architectural design, though seldom of individual taste; and, as far as possible, they stand aloof from the street, and separated each from its neighbor by hedge or fence, in accordance with the careful exclusiveness of the English character, which impels the occupant, moreover, to cover the front of his dwelling with as much concealment of shrubbery as his limits will allow. Through the interstices, you catch glimpses of well-kept lawns, generally ornamented with flowers, and with what the English call rock-work, being heaps of ivy-grown stones and fossils, designed for romantic effect in a small way. Two or three of such village streets as are here described take a collective name,—as, for instance, Blackheath Park,—and constitute a kind of community of residents, with gateways, kept by a policeman, and a semi-privacy, stepping beyond which, you find yourself on the breezy heath.

So much for the inside of our home—a place of deep calm, close to the hustle and bustle. But even when we stepped outside our gate, we weren't immediately hit with the presence of the outside world. We were living in one of those oases that have developed (in relatively recent years, I believe) on the vast expanse of Blackheath, which otherwise has a huge area of empty land surprisingly close to the city. Generally speaking, ownership of the land seems to belong to everyone and no one; however, exclusive rights have been claimed here and there, mainly by people whose daily lives connect them with London, so you see their villas or small houses along village streets that often look more American than the older English towns. The scene is semi-rural. Decorative trees shade the sidewalks, and grassy strips line the wheel tracks. The houses do have certain differences from those in an American village, showing hints of architectural design, though rarely individual style; and, as much as possible, they sit back from the street, each separated from its neighbor by hedges or fences, reflecting the careful exclusivity of the English character, which also leads the owner to cover the front of their home with as much greenery as space allows. Through the gaps, you can catch glimpses of well-kept lawns, usually enhanced with flowers and what the English call rock-work—piles of ivy-covered stones and fossils, designed for a small-scale romantic effect. A few of these village streets collectively go by a name—like Blackheath Park—and form a sort of community of residents, with gates manned by a policeman, and a semi-private atmosphere; stepping beyond this, you find yourself on the breezy heath.

On this great, bare, dreary common I often went astray, as I afterwards did on the Campagna of Rome, and drew the air (tainted with London smoke though it might be) into my lungs by deep inspirations, with a strange and unexpected sense of desert freedom. The misty atmosphere helps you to fancy a remoteness that perhaps does not quite exist. During the little time that it lasts, the solitude is as impressive as that of a Western prairie or forest; but soon the railway shriek, a mile or two away, insists upon informing you of your whereabout; or you recognize in the distance some landmark that you may have known,—an insulated villa, perhaps, with its garden-wall around it, or the rudimental street of a new settlement which is sprouting on this otherwise barren soil. Half a century ago, the most frequent token of man's beneficent contiguity might have been a gibbet, and the creak, like a tavern sign, of a murderer swinging to and fro in irons. Blackheath, with its highwaymen and footpads, was dangerous in those days; and even now, for aught I know, the Western prairie may still compare favorably with it as a safe region to go astray in. When I was acquainted with Blackheath, the ingenious device of garroting had recently come into fashion; and I can remember, while crossing those waste places at midnight, and hearing footsteps behind me, to have been sensibly encouraged by also hearing, not far off, the clinking hoof-tramp of one of the horse-patrols who do regular duty there. About sunset, or a little later, was the time when the broad and somewhat desolate peculiarity of the heath seemed to me to put on its utmost impressiveness. At that hour, finding myself on elevated ground, I once had a view of immense London, four or five miles off, with the vast Dome in the midst, and the towers of the two Houses of Parliament rising up into the smoky canopy, the thinner substance of which obscured a mass of things, and hovered about the objects that were most distinctly visible,—a glorious and sombre picture, dusky, awful, but irresistibly attractive, like a young man's dream of the great world, foretelling at that distance a grandeur never to be fully realized.

On this vast, empty, dreary common, I often lost my way, just like I later did on the Campagna of Rome, inhaling the air (tainted with London smoke, as it might be) deeply into my lungs, feeling a strange and unexpected sense of freedom. The misty atmosphere gives you the illusion of a distance that may not actually exist. For the short time it lasts, the solitude is as striking as that of a Western prairie or forest; but soon the sound of a train whistle, a mile or two away, reminds you of your location; or you spot some familiar landmark in the distance—maybe a secluded villa with its garden wall, or the early signs of a new settlement emerging on this otherwise barren land. Half a century ago, the most common sign of man's close presence might have been a gallows, or the creaking of a murderer swinging from the noose. Blackheath, with its highwaymen and footpads, was dangerous back then; and even now, for all I know, the Western prairie might still be a safer place to wander. When I knew Blackheath, the clever method of garroting had recently become popular; I remember walking through those desolate areas at midnight, hearing footsteps behind me, and feeling reassured by the sound of the horse patrol nearby. Around sunset, or a little later, the broad and somewhat desolate character of the heath seemed to reach its peak impressiveness. At that time, standing on elevated ground, I once saw the immense expanse of London, four or five miles away, with the vast Dome in the center, and the towers of the two Houses of Parliament rising into the smoky sky, the lighter mist obscuring a multitude of things and surrounding the most clearly visible objects—a glorious and somber scene, dark and daunting, yet powerfully enticing, like a young man's vision of the great world, foreshadowing a grandeur that would never be fully realized.

While I lived in that neighborhood, the tents of two or three sets of cricket-players were constantly pitched on Blackheath, and matches were going forward that seemed to involve the honor and credit of communities or counties, exciting an interest in everybody but myself, who cared not what part of England might glorify itself at the expense of another. It is necessary to be born an Englishman, I believe, in order to enjoy this great national game; at any rate, as a spectacle for an outside observer, I found it lazy, lingering, tedious, and utterly devoid of pictorial effects. Choice of other amusements was at hand. Butts for archery were established, and bows and arrows were to be let, at so many shots for a penny,—there being abundance of space for a farther flight-shot than any modern archer can lend to his shaft. Then there was an absurd game of throwing a stick at crockery-ware, which I have witnessed a hundred times, and personally engaged in once or twice, without ever having the satisfaction to see a bit of broken crockery. In other spots you found donkeys for children to ride, and ponies of a very meek and patient spirit, on which the Cockney pleasure-seekers of both sexes rode races and made wonderful displays of horsemanship. By way of refreshment there was gingerbread (but, as a true patriot, I must pronounce it greatly interior to our native dainty), and ginger-beer, and probably stauncher liquor among the booth-keeper's hidden stores. The frequent railway-trains, as well as the numerous steamers to Greenwich, have made the vacant portions of Blackheath a play-ground and breathing-place for the Londoners, readily and very cheaply accessible; so that, in view of this broader use and enjoyment, I a little grudged the tracts that have been filched away, so to speak, and individualized by thriving citizens. One sort of visitors especially interested me: they were schools of little boys or girls, under the guardianship of their instructors,— charity schools, as I often surmised from their aspect, collected among dark alleys and squalid courts; and hither they were brought to spend a summer afternoon, these pale little progeny of the sunless nooks of London, who had never known that the sky was any broader than that narrow and vapory strip above their native lane. I fancied that they took but a doubtful pleasure, being half affrighted at the wide, empty space overhead and round about them, finding the air too little medicated with smoke, soot, and graveyard exhalations, to be breathed with comfort, and feeling shelterless and lost because grimy London, their slatternly and disreputable mother, had suffered them to stray out of her arms.

While I lived in that neighborhood, the tents of two or three groups of cricket players were constantly set up on Blackheath, and matches were being played that seemed to involve the pride and reputation of communities or counties, capturing the interest of everyone except me, who didn’t care which part of England could boast itself at another's expense. I believe you have to be born an Englishman to really enjoy this great national game; anyway, as a spectator, I found it lazy, drawn-out, tedious, and completely lacking in visual appeal. There were plenty of other fun activities available. There were archery butts set up, and bows and arrows could be rented at a penny for a set number of shots—there was plenty of space for longer shots than any modern archer could get from his arrow. Then there was a silly game of throwing sticks at crockery, which I’d seen a hundred times and tried once or twice myself, without ever having the satisfaction of breaking any pottery. In other areas, there were donkeys for kids to ride and soft, patient ponies that the London pleasure-seekers of both genders raced and showcased their riding skills on. For snacks, there was gingerbread (although, as a true patriot, I must say it's nowhere near as good as our native treats), ginger beer, and probably stronger drinks hidden in the booth-keeper's supplies. The frequent trains and many steamers to Greenwich have turned the vacant parts of Blackheath into a playground and escape for Londoners, making it easily and cheaply accessible. So, considering this broader enjoyment, I slightly resented the areas that had been taken, so to speak, and claimed by thriving citizens. One group of visitors particularly caught my attention: schools of little boys or girls, supervised by their teachers—charity schools, I often guessed from their appearance, gathered from dark alleys and shabby courts; they were brought here to spend a summer afternoon, these pale little kids from the sunless corners of London who had never realized that the sky could be any wider than the small, cloudy strip above their neighborhood. I imagined they found only a questionable pleasure in being there, half scared by the vast, empty space above and around them, struggling to breathe comfortably in air that was too clear of smoke, soot, and graveyard smells, feeling exposed and lost because grimy London, their disheveled and neglectful mother, had let them wander out of her reach.

Passing among these holiday people, we come to one of the gateways of Greenwich Park, opening through an old brick wall. It admits us from the bare heath into a scene of antique cultivation and woodland ornament, traversed in all directions by avenues of trees, many of which bear tokens of a venerable age. These broad and well-kept pathways rise and decline over the elevations and along the bases of gentle hills which diversify the whole surface of the Park. The loftiest, and most abrupt of them (though but of very moderate height) is one of the earth's noted summits, and may hold up its head with Mont Blanc and Chimborazo, as being the site of Greenwich Observatory, where, if all nations will consent to say so, the longitude of our great globe begins. I used to regulate my watch by the broad dial-plate against the Observatory wall, and felt it pleasant to be standing at the very centre of Time and Space.

As we stroll through the holiday crowd, we arrive at one of the entrances to Greenwich Park, which opens through an old brick wall. It takes us from the open heath into a scene of historic cultivation and woodland beauty, filled with tree-lined paths that stretch in every direction, many of which show signs of age. These wide, well-maintained pathways rise and fall over the gentle hills that shape the entire landscape of the Park. The tallest and steepest of them, although only moderately high, is one of the notable peaks on Earth, standing proudly alongside Mont Blanc and Chimborazo, as it is home to the Greenwich Observatory, where, if the world agrees, the longitude of our planet begins. I used to set my watch by the large dial on the Observatory wall and found it enjoyable to stand at the very center of Time and Space.

There are lovelier parks than this in the neighborhood of London, richer scenes of greensward and cultivated trees; and Kensington, especially, in a summer afternoon, has seemed to me as delightful as any place can or ought to be, in a world which, some time or other, we must quit. But Greenwich, too, is beautiful,—a spot where the art of man has conspired with Nature, as if he and the great mother had taken counsel together how to make a pleasant scene, and the longest liver of the two had faithfully carried out their mutual design. It has, likewise, an additional charm of its own, because, to all appearance, it is the people's property and play-ground in a much more genuine way than the aristocratic resorts in closer vicinity to the metropolis. It affords one of the instances in which the monarch's property is actually the people's, and shows how much more natural is their relation to the sovereign than to the nobility, which pretends to hold the intervening space between the two: for a nobleman makes a paradise only for himself, and fills it with his own pomp and pride; whereas the people are sooner or later the legitimate inheritors of whatever beauty kings and queens create, as now of Greenwich Park. On Sundays, when the sun shone, and even on those grim and sombre days when, if it do not actually rain, the English persist in calling it fine weather, it was too good to see how sturdily the plebeians trod under their own oaks, and what fulness of simple enjoyment they evidently found there. They were the people,—not the populace,— specimens of a class whose Sunday clothes are a distinct kind of garb from their week-day ones; and this, in England, implies wholesome habits of life, daily thrift, and a rank above the lowest. I longed to be acquainted with them, in order to investigate what manner of folks they were, what sort of households they kept, their politics, their religion, their tastes, and whether they were as narrow-minded as their betters. There can be very little doubt of it: an Englishman is English, in whatever rank of life, though no more intensely so, I should imagine, as an artisan or petty shopkeeper, than as a member of Parliament.

There are prettier parks than this in the London area, with more vibrant greens and well-kept trees; and Kensington, especially on a summer afternoon, has struck me as charming as any place can or should be in a world we must eventually leave. But Greenwich is beautiful too—a place where human creativity meets nature, as if both had collaborated on how to create a lovely scene, with the one that lives longer following through on their shared vision. It also has a unique charm because it genuinely feels like it's owned by the people and serves as a playground for them, much more sincerely than the upscale locations closer to the city. It shows how the monarch’s property can actually be the people’s, highlighting a more natural relationship with the sovereign compared to the nobility, which tries to hold the space in between: a nobleman creates a paradise only for himself, filling it with his own grandeur and vanity; meanwhile, the people eventually inherit whatever beauty kings and queens create, like Greenwich Park today. On Sundays, when the sun shone, and even on those gloomy days when the English still call it fine weather if it’s not raining, it was heartwarming to see how confidently the common people walked beneath their own oaks and the pure enjoyment they found there. They weren’t just the masses; they were representatives of a class whose Sunday outfits are distinctly different from their weekday clothes, which in England suggests healthy living habits, everyday savings, and a status above the lowest. I wanted to get to know them to understand what kind of people they were, what kind of homes they maintained, their political views, their faith, their interests, and whether they were as narrow-minded as those above them. There’s little doubt about it: an Englishman is still very much English, no matter their social standing, though I’d imagine that an artisan or small shopkeeper does not express it any less intensely than a member of Parliament.

The English character, as I conceive it, is by no means a very lofty one; they seem to have a great deal of earth and grimy dust clinging about them, as was probably the case with the stalwart and quarrelsome people who sprouted up out of the soil, after Cadmus had sown the dragon's teeth. And yet, though the individual Englishman is sometimes preternaturally disagreeable, an observer standing aloof has a sense of natural kindness towards them in the lump. They adhere closer to the original simplicity in which mankind was created than we ourselves do; they love, quarrel, laugh, cry, and turn their actual selves inside out, with greater freedom than any class of Americans would consider decorous. It was often so with these holiday folks in Greenwich Park; and, ridiculous as it may sound, I fancy myself to have caught very satisfactory glimpses of Arcadian life among the Cockneys there, hardly beyond the scope of Bow-Bells, picnicking in the grass, uncouthly gambolling on the broad slopes, or straying in motley groups or by single pairs of love-making youths and maidens, along the sun-streaked avenues. Even the omnipresent policemen or park-keepers could not disturb the beatific impression on my mind. One feature, at all events, of the Golden Age was to be seen in the herds of deer that encountered you in the somewhat remoter recesses of the Park, and were readily prevailed upon to nibble a bit of bread out of your hand. But, though no wrong had ever been done them, and no horn had sounded nor hound bayed at the heels of themselves or their antlered progenitors for centuries past, there was still an apprehensiveness lingering in their hearts; so that a slight movement of the hand or a step too near would send a whole squadron of them scampering away, just as a breath scatters the winged seeds of a dandelion.

The English character, as I see it, isn’t particularly noble; they seem to carry a lot of dirt and grime with them, much like the tough and quarrelsome people who emerged from the ground after Cadmus sowed the dragon's teeth. Yet, even though an individual Englishman can sometimes be extremely unpleasant, an outsider watching has a feeling of natural kindness towards them as a whole. They hold onto the original simplicity in which humanity was created more than we do; they love, argue, laugh, cry, and show their true selves more freely than any group of Americans would find appropriate. This was often the case with those holiday-goers in Greenwich Park; and, as silly as it might sound, I believe I caught some pretty satisfying glimpses of Arcadian life among the Cockneys there, not far from Bow Bells, enjoying picnics on the grass, awkwardly frolicking on the wide slopes, or wandering in colorful groups or as pairs of young lovers along the sunlit paths. Even the ever-present policemen or park-keepers couldn’t spoil the blissful impression in my mind. One aspect, at least, of the Golden Age was evident in the herds of deer that you’d encounter in the more secluded areas of the Park, readily accepting bits of bread from your hand. But, despite not having experienced any harm and with no horn sounding or hound chasing them or their antlered ancestors for centuries, there was still a sense of fear in their hearts; so that even a slight hand movement or a step too close would send a whole group of them dashing away, just like a breath scatters the fluffy seeds of a dandelion.

The aspect of Greenwich Park, with all those festal people wandering through it, resembled that of the Borghese Gardens under the walls of Rome, on a Sunday or Saint's day; but, I am not ashamed to say, it a little disturbed whatever grim ghost of Puritanic strictness might be lingering in the sombre depths of a New England heart, among severe and sunless remembrances of the Sabbaths of childhood, and pangs of remorse for ill-gotten lessons in the catechism, and for erratic fantasies or hardly suppressed laughter in the middle of long sermons. Occasionally, I tried to take the long-hoarded sting out of these compunctious smarts by attending divine service in the open air. On a cart outside of the Park-wall (and, if I mistake not, at two or three corners and secluded spots within the Park itself) a Methodist preacher uplifts his voice and speedily gathers a congregation, his zeal for whose religious welfare impels the good man to such earnest vociferation and toilsome gesture that his perspiring face is quickly in a stew. His inward flame conspires with the too fervid sun and makes a positive martyr of him, even in the very exercise of his pious labor; insomuch that he purchases every atom of spiritual increment to his hearers by loss of his own corporeal solidity, and, should his discourse last long enough, must finally exhale before their eyes. If I smile at him, be it understood, it is not in scorn; he performs his sacred office more acceptably than many a prelate. These wayside services attract numbers who would not otherwise listen to prayer, sermon, or hymn, from one year's end to another, and who, for that very reason, are the auditors most likely to be moved by the preacher's eloquence. Yonder Greenwich pensioner, too,— in his costume of three-cornered hat, and old-fashioned, brass-buttoned blue coat with ample skirts, which makes him look like a contemporary of Admiral Benbow,—that tough old mariner may hear a word or two which will go nearer his heart than anything that the chaplain of the Hospital can be expected to deliver. I always noticed, moreover, that a considerable proportion of the audience were soldiers, who came hither with a day's leave from Woolwich,—hardy veterans in aspect, some of whom wore as many as four or five medals, Crimean or East Indian, on the breasts of their scarlet coats. The miscellaneous congregation listen with every appearance of heartfelt interest; and, for my own part, I must frankly acknowledge that I never found it possible to give five minutes' attention to any other English preaching: so cold and commonplace are the homilies that pass for such, under the aged roofs of churches. And as for cathedrals, the sermon is an exceedingly diminutive and unimportant part of the religious services,—if, indeed, it be considered a part,— among the pompous ceremonies, the intonations, and the resounding and lofty-voiced strains of the choristers. The magnificence of the setting quite dazzles out what we Puritans look upon as the jewel of the whole affair; for I presume that it was our forefathers, the Dissenters in England and America, who gave the sermon its present prominence in the Sabbath exercises.

The scene at Greenwich Park, with all the festive people strolling through it, looked a lot like the Borghese Gardens in Rome on a Sunday or a saint's day; but, I’m not ashamed to admit, it slightly troubled any grim ghost of Puritanical strictness that might be lingering in the dark corners of a New England heart, haunted by stern and sunless memories of childhood Sundays, and feelings of guilt for the poorly learned catechism lessons, and for the fleeting daydreams or barely contained laughter during long sermons. Occasionally, I tried to ease the long-held sting of these guilty feelings by attending open-air services. Near a cart outside the park wall (and if I’m not mistaken, at a couple of corners and hidden spots within the park itself), a Methodist preacher raises his voice and quickly gathers a crowd, his passion for their spiritual well-being compelling him to such fervent shouting and animated gestures that his sweating face is soon a mess. His inner fire combines with the intense sun, making him almost a martyr in the very act of his holy work; so much so that he sacrifices a part of his own physical strength for every moment of spiritual gain for his listeners, and if he speaks long enough, he might just collapse before them. If I smile at him, let it be clear that it’s not in mockery; he carries out his sacred duty more effectively than many high-ranking clergy. These roadside services attract many who wouldn’t typically listen to prayer, sermons, or hymns throughout the year, and for that reason, they are the audience most likely to be touched by the preacher’s words. That Greenwich pensioner over there—dressed in his three-cornered hat and old-fashioned blue coat with brass buttons, looking like a contemporary of Admiral Benbow—might hear a few words that strike him closer to home than anything the Hospital chaplain might offer. I’ve also noticed that a significant portion of the audience is made up of soldiers, who come here on a day off from Woolwich—tough veterans, some wearing four or five medals from the Crimean or East Indian campaigns on the chests of their red coats. The diverse congregation listens with visible interest; and for my part, I must honestly say that I’ve never been able to pay attention for even five minutes to any other English sermon: the preachings that commonly take place under the old roofs of churches are so dull and ordinary. As for cathedrals, the sermon is an extremely minor and insignificant part of the religious services—if it can even be called a part—amidst the grand ceremonies, the intonations, and the powerful, soaring voices of the choir. The splendor of the setting completely overshadows what we Puritans see as the central gem of the whole affair; for I assume it was our forebears, the Dissenters in England and America, who elevated the sermon to its current significance in Sunday worship.

The Methodists are probably the first and only Englishmen who have worshipped in the open air since the ancient Britons listened to the preaching of the Druids; and it reminded me of that old priesthood, to see certain memorials of their dusky epoch—not religious, however, but warlike—in the neighborhood of the spot where the Methodist was holding forth. These were some ancient barrows, beneath or within which are supposed to be buried the slain of a forgotten or doubtfully remembered battle, fought on the site of Greenwich Park as long ago as two or three centuries after the birth of Christ. Whatever may once have been their height and magnitude, they have now scarcely more prominence in the actual scene than the battle of which they are the sole monuments retains in history,—being only a few mounds side by side, elevated a little above the surface of the ground, ten or twelve feet in diameter, with a shallow depression in their summits. When one of them was opened, not long since, no bones, nor armor, nor weapons were discovered, nothing but some small jewels, and a tuft of hair,—perhaps from the head of a valiant general, who, dying on the field of his victory, bequeathed this lock, together with his indestructible fame, to after ages. The hair and jewels are probably in the British Museum, where the potsherds and rubbish of innumerable generations make the visitor wish that each passing century could carry off all its fragments and relics along with it, instead of adding them to the continually accumulating burden which human knowledge is compelled to lug upon its back. As for the fame, I know not what has become of it.

The Methodists are likely the first and only English people who have worshipped outdoors since the ancient Britons listened to the Druids preach. It reminded me of that old priesthood to see some reminders of their dark past—not religious, but warlike—near where the Methodist was speaking. These were some ancient burial mounds, believed to hold the remains of those lost in a forgotten or vaguely remembered battle that took place at Greenwich Park two or three centuries after the birth of Christ. Whatever their original height and size, they now barely stand out in the landscape, much like the battle they commemorate does in history. They are just a few mounds next to each other, slightly raised above the ground, around ten or twelve feet wide, with shallow dips at the tops. When one of them was opened recently, no bones, armor, or weapons were found, just a few small jewels and a tuft of hair—perhaps from the head of a brave general, who, dying on the battlefield victorious, left this lock behind along with his enduring legacy. The hair and jewels are probably stored in the British Museum, where the broken pottery and debris from countless generations make visitors wish that each century could take away its remnants instead of adding to the ever-growing load that human knowledge has to bear. As for the legacy, I have no idea what happened to it.

After traversing the Park, we come into the neighborhood of Greenwich Hospital, and will pass through one of its spacious gateways for the sake of glancing at an establishment which does more honor to the heart of England than anything else that I am acquainted with, of a public nature. It is very seldom that we can be sensible of anything like kindliness in the acts or relations of such an artificial thing as a National Government. Our own government, I should conceive, is too much an abstraction ever to feel any sympathy for its maimed sailors and soldiers, though it will doubtless do then a severe kind of justice, as chilling as the touch of steel. But it seemed to me that the Greenwich pensioners are the petted children of the nation, and that the government is their dry-nurse, and that the old men themselves have a childlike consciousness of their position. Very likely, a better sort of life might have been arranged, and a wiser care bestowed on them; but, such as it is, it enables them to spend a sluggish, careless, comfortable old age, grumbling, growling, gruff, as if all the foul weather of their past years were pent up within them, yet not much more discontented than such weather-beaten and battle-battered fragments of human kind must inevitably be. Their home, in its outward form, is on a very magnificent plan. Its germ was a royal palace, the full expansion of which has resulted in a series of edifices externally more beautiful than any English palace that I have seen, consisting of several quadrangles of stately architecture, united by colonnades and gravel-walks, and enclosing grassy squares, with statues in the centre, the whole extending along the Thames. It is built of marble, or very light-colored stone, in the classic style, with pillars and porticos, which (to my own taste, and, I fancy, to that of the old sailors) produce but a cold and shivery effect in the English climate. Had I been the architect, I would have studied the characters, habits, and predilections of nautical people in Wapping, Hotherhithe, and the neighborhood of the Tower (places which I visited in affectionate remembrance of Captain Lemuel Gulliver, and other actual or mythological navigators), and would have built the hospital in a kind of ethereal similitude to the narrow, dark, ugly, and inconvenient, but snug and cosey homeliness of the sailor boarding-houses there. There can be no question that all the above attributes, or enough of then to satisfy an old sailor's heart, might be reconciled with architectural beauty and the wholesome contrivances of modern dwellings, and thus a novel and genuine style of building be given to the world.

After walking through the Park, we arrive at the area of Greenwich Hospital, where we'll pass through one of its large gates just to take a look at an establishment that reflects England's heart better than anything else I know of in the public sphere. It's rare to feel any kind of kindness in the actions or relationships of something as artificial as a National Government. I believe our own government is too much of an abstraction to ever truly care for its injured sailors and soldiers, though it will certainly administer a cold sort of justice as harsh as steel. However, the Greenwich pensioners seem to be the spoiled children of the nation, with the government acting as their caregiver, and the old men themselves have a childlike awareness of their situation. It's likely that a better life could have been arranged for them, and that wiser care could have been provided, but as it stands, it allows them to enjoy a lazy, carefree, comfortable old age, complaining and grumbling as if all the bad weather of their past is bottled up inside them, yet not much more discontented than those worn-out, battle-scarred fragments of humanity inevitably are. Their home, in its outward appearance, is grandly designed. It began as a royal palace, and its development has led to a series of buildings that are more beautiful than any English palace I’ve seen, featuring several quadrangles of impressive architecture linked by colonnades and paths, enclosing grassy areas with statues in the center, all extending along the Thames. It's made of marble or very light-colored stone, in the classic style, with pillars and porticos that, to my taste—and I think to the old sailors' as well—create a cold and chilly effect in the English climate. If I had been the architect, I would have considered the characteristics, habits, and preferences of maritime people in Wapping, Hotherhithe, and around the Tower (places I visited fondly recalling Captain Lemuel Gulliver and other real or fictional sailors), and would have designed the hospital to resemble the narrow, dark, unattractive, and inconvenient, yet snug and cozy atmosphere of the boarding houses for sailors there. There's no doubt that all these qualities, or enough of them to satisfy an old sailor's heart, could be blended with architectural beauty and the practical features of modern homes, thus introducing a new and authentic style of building to the world.

But their countrymen meant kindly by the old fellows in assigning them the ancient royal site where Elizabeth held her court and Charles II. began to build his palace. So far as the locality went, it was treating them like so many kings; and, with a discreet abundance of grog, beer, and tobacco, there was perhaps little more to be accomplished in behalf of men whose whole previous lives have tended to unfit them for old age. Their chief discomfort is probably for lack of something to do or think about. But, judging by the few whom I saw, a listless habit seems to have crept over them, a dim dreaminess of mood, in which they sit between asleep and awake, and find the long day wearing towards bedtime without its having made any distinct record of itself upon their consciousness. Sitting on stone benches in the sunshine, they subside into slumber, or nearly so, and start at the approach of footsteps echoing under the colonnades, ashamed to be caught napping, and rousing themselves in a hurry, as formerly on the midnight watch at sea. In their brightest moments, they gather in groups and bore one another with endless sea-yarns about their voyages under famous admirals, and about gale and calm, battle and chase, and all that class of incident that has its sphere on the deck and in the hollow interior of a ship, where their world has exclusively been. For other pastime, they quarrel among themselves, comrade with comrade, and perhaps shake paralytic fists in furrowed faces. If inclined for a little exercise, they can bestir their wooden legs on the long esplanade that borders by the Thames, criticising the rig of passing ships, and firing off volleys of malediction at the steamers, which have made the sea another element than that they used to be acquainted with. All this is but cold comfort for the evening of life, yet may compare rather favorably with the preceding portions of it, comprising little save imprisonment on shipboard, in the course of which they have been tossed all about the world and caught hardly a glimpse of it, forgetting what grass and trees are, and never finding out what woman is, though they may have encountered a painted spectre which they took for her. A country owes much to human beings whose bodies she has worn out and whose immortal part she has left undeveloped or debased, as we tied them here; and having wasted an idle paragraph upon them, let me now suggest that old men have a kind of susceptibility to moral impressions, and even (up to an advanced period) a receptivity of truth, which often appears to come to them after the active time of life is past. The Greenwich pensioners might prove better subjects for true education now than in their school-boy days; but then where is the Normal School that could educate instructors for such a class?

But their fellow countrymen had good intentions for the old guys when they assigned them the historic royal site where Elizabeth held her court and Charles II. started building his palace. In terms of the location, it was treating them like kings; and with plenty of grog, beer, and tobacco, there wasn’t much more to do for men whose entire lives had made them unprepared for old age. Their main discomfort probably comes from a lack of things to do or think about. However, judging by the few I saw, a lethargic habit seems to have settled over them, a vague dreaminess, where they sit somewhere between asleep and awake, finding the long day drifting toward bedtime without leaving any clear mark on their awareness. Sitting on stone benches in the sunshine, they drift into sleep—almost—and startle awake at the sound of footsteps echoing under the colonnades, embarrassed to be caught napping, hurriedly rousing themselves, just like when they were on nighttime watch at sea. In their livelier moments, they gather in groups and bore each other with endless sea stories about their voyages under famous admirals, discussing storms and calm seas, battles and chases, and all those experiences that belong on deck and in the depths of a ship, where their world has been confined. For other amusement, they argue among themselves, comrades against comrades, possibly shaking their weak fists in weathered faces. If they feel like getting some exercise, they can move their stiff legs down the long promenade along the Thames, critiquing the rigs of passing ships and unleashing a stream of curses at the steamers that have changed the sea from what they once knew. All this is just scant comfort for the twilight years of life, but it may actually seem quite good compared to the earlier days, which were composed mostly of being trapped on ships, tossed around the globe while barely catching a glimpse of it, forgetting what grass and trees look like, and never truly understanding what a woman is, even if they might have encountered a painted illusion they mistook for her. A country owes a lot to the individuals whose bodies it has worn out and whose spirits it has left either undeveloped or degraded, as we've seen here; and having spent a useless paragraph on them, let me now suggest that older men have a certain sensitivity to moral lessons, and even (up to a ripe age) a receptiveness to truth, which often seems to develop after their more active years are over. The Greenwich pensioners might be better candidates for genuine education now than they were in their schoolboy days; but then, where is the Normal School that could train teachers for such a group?

There is a beautiful chapel for the pensioners, in the classic style, over the altar of which hangs a picture by West. I never could look at it long enough to make out its design; for this artist (though it pains me to say it of so respectable a countryman) had a gift of frigidity, a knack of grinding ice into his paint, a power of stupefying the spectator's perceptions and quelling his sympathy, beyond any other limner that ever handled a brush. In spite of many pangs of conscience, I seize this opportunity to wreak a lifelong abhorrence upon the poor, blameless man, for the sake of that dreary picture of Lear, an explosion of frosty fury, that used to be a bugbear to me in the Athenaeum Exhibition. Would fire burn it, I wonder?

There’s a beautiful chapel for the retirees, styled in the classic way, with a painting by West hanging above the altar. I could never look at it long enough to understand its design because this artist (even though it pains me to say it about such a respected countryman) had a talent for coldness, a way of turning his paint into ice, a skill for numbing the viewer's senses and dampening their emotions more than any other painter I've encountered. Despite feeling guilty, I take this chance to express my lifelong dislike for the poor, innocent man, all because of that dreary painting of Lear, a burst of icy rage, that used to haunt me at the Athenaeum Exhibition. I wonder if fire would burn it?

The principal thing that they have to show you, at Greenwich Hospital, is the Painted Hall. It is a splendid and spacious room, at least a hundred feet long and half as high, with a ceiling painted in fresco by Sir James Thornhill. As a work of art, I presume, this frescoed canopy has little merit, though it produces an exceedingly rich effect by its brilliant coloring and as a specimen of magnificent upholstery. The walls of the grand apartment are entirely covered with pictures, many of them representing battles and other naval incidents that were once fresher in the world's memory than now, but chiefly portraits of old admirals, comprising the whole line of heroes who have trod the quarter-decks of British ships for more than two hundred years back. Next to a tomb in Westminster Abbey, which was Nelson's most elevated object of ambition, it would seem to be the highest need of a naval warrior to have his portrait hung up in the Painted Hall; but, by dint of victory upon victory, these illustrious personages have grown to be a mob, and by no means a very interesting one, so far as regards the character of the faces here depicted. They are generally commonplace, and often singularly stolid; and I have observed (both in the Painted Hall and elsewhere, and not only in portraits, but in the actual presence of such renowned people as I have caught glimpses of) that the countenances of heroes are not nearly so impressive as those of statesmen,—except, of course, in the rare instances where warlike ability has been but the one-sided manifestation of a profound genius for managing the world's affairs. Nine tenths of these distinguished admirals, for instance, if their faces tell truth, must needs have been blockheads, and might have served better, one would imagine, as wooden figure-heads for their own ships than to direct any difficult and intricate scheme of action from the quarter-deck. It is doubtful whether the same kind of men will hereafter meet with a similar degree of success; for they were victorious chiefly through the old English hardihood, exercised in a field of which modern science had not yet got possession. Rough valor has lost something of its value, since their days, and must continue to sink lower and lower in the comparative estimate of warlike qualities. In the next naval war, as between England and France, I would bet, methinks, upon the Frenchman's head.

The main attraction at Greenwich Hospital is the Painted Hall. It’s a grand and spacious room, at least a hundred feet long and about half as high, with a ceiling painted in fresco by Sir James Thornhill. As a piece of art, I suppose this frescoed ceiling doesn’t have much artistic value, but it creates an incredibly rich effect with its bright colors and serves as a stunning example of grand decoration. The walls of this grand room are completely covered with paintings, many depicting battles and other naval events that used to be more prominent in people’s minds than they are now, but mostly portraits of old admirals, representing the entire line of heroes who've stood on the quarter-decks of British ships for over two hundred years. Aside from a tomb in Westminster Abbey, which was Nelson's ultimate ambition, hanging a portrait in the Painted Hall seems to be the highest aspiration for a naval officer. However, due to a multitude of victories, these notable figures have turned into a crowd, and not a very interesting one when it comes to their facial features. They generally look quite ordinary and often remarkably dull; I’ve noticed (both in the Painted Hall and elsewhere, not only in portraits but also in the actual presence of some renowned individuals I’ve seen) that the faces of heroes are rarely as striking as those of statesmen—except, of course, in the rare cases where military talent is just a one-sided expression of a deep genius for handling global affairs. For instance, nine out of ten of these distinguished admirals, if their faces are anything to go by, must have been simpletons, and one might think they’d serve better as wooden figureheads for their own ships than directing any complex and challenging plans from the quarter-deck. It’s uncertain whether similar individuals will achieve the same level of success in the future; they won their victories mainly through old-fashioned English bravery in a domain where modern science hadn’t yet taken over. Raw courage has lost some of its value since their time, and it’s bound to continue decreasing in rank among the qualities valued in combat. In the next naval conflict between England and France, I would bet on the Frenchman’s victory.

It is remarkable, however, that the great naval hero of England—the greatest, therefore, in the world, and of all time—had none of the stolid characteristics that belong to his class, and cannot fairly be accepted as their representative man. Foremost in the roughest of professions, he was as delicately organized as a woman, and as painfully sensitive as a poet. More than any other Englishman he won the love and admiration of his country, but won them through the efficacy of qualities that are not English, or, at all events, were intensified in his case and made poignant and powerful by something morbid in the man, which put him otherwise at cross-purposes with life. He was a man of genius; and genius in an Englishman (not to cite the good old simile of a pearl in the oyster) is usually a symptom of a lack of balance in the general making-up of the character; as we may satisfy ourselves by running over the list of their poets, for example, and observing how many of them have been sickly or deformed, and how often their lives have been darkened by insanity. An ordinary Englishman is the healthiest and wholesomest of human beings; an extraordinary one is almost always, in one way or another, a sick man. It was so with Lord Nelson. The wonderful contrast or relation between his personal qualities, the position which he held, and the life that he lived, makes him as interesting a personage as all history has to show; and it is a pity that Southey's biography—so good in its superficial way, and yet so inadequate as regards any real delineation of the man—should have taken the subject out of the hands of some writer endowed with more delicate appreciation and deeper insight than that genuine Englishman possessed. But Southey accomplished his own purpose, which, apparently, was to present his hero as a pattern for England's young midshipmen.

It’s noteworthy, however, that England's great naval hero—the greatest in the world and of all time—lacked the stiff traits typical of his class and can't truly be seen as their representative. At the forefront of the roughest profession, he was as finely tuned as a woman and as deeply sensitive as a poet. More than any other Englishman, he captured the love and admiration of his country, but he did so through qualities that aren’t typically English, or at least were amplified in his case by something troubling within him, which often put him at odds with life. He was a genius; and genius in an Englishman (not to use the old saying about a pearl in an oyster) usually indicates a lack of balance in the character's overall makeup. We can confirm this by looking through the list of their poets, noting how many have been physically weak or disabled, and how often their lives have been shadowed by madness. A regular Englishman is the healthiest and most well-rounded of people; an extraordinary one is almost always, in one way or another, a troubled soul. The same was true for Lord Nelson. The fascinating contrast between his personal traits, the role he held, and the life he led makes him one of the most compelling figures in all of history. It’s unfortunate that Southey's biography—though good in its own right, yet lacking in its true portrayal of the man—should have taken the topic away from a writer with a more nuanced understanding and deeper insight than that genuine Englishman had. But Southey achieved his aim, which was apparently to present his hero as a model for England's young midshipmen.

But the English capacity for hero-worship is full to the brim with what they are able to comprehend of Lord Nelson's character. Adjoining the Painted Hall is a smaller room, the walls of which are completely and exclusively adorned with pictures of the great Admiral's exploits. We see the frail, ardent man in all the most noted events of his career, from his encounter with a Polar bear to his death at Trafalgar, quivering here and there about the room like a blue, lambent flame. No Briton ever enters that apartment without feeling the beef and ale of his composition stirred to its depths, and finding himself changed into a Hero for the notice, however stolid his brain, however tough his heart, however unexcitable his ordinary mood. To confess the truth, I myself, though belonging to another parish, have been deeply sensible to the sublime recollections there aroused, acknowledging that Nelson expressed his life in a kind of symbolic poetry which I had as much right to understand as these burly islanders. Cool and critical observer as I sought to be, I enjoyed their burst of honest indignation when a visitor (not an American, I am glad to say) thrust his walking-stick almost into Nelson's face, in one of the pictures, by way of pointing a remark; and the bystanders immediately glowed like so many hot coals, and would probably have consumed the offender in their wrath, had he not effected his retreat. But the most sacred objects of all are two of Nelson's coats, under separate glass cases. One is that which he wore at the Battle of the Nile, and it is now sadly injured by moths, which will quite destroy it in a few years, unless its guardians preserve it as we do Washington's military suit, by occasionally baking it in an oven. The other is the coat in which he received his death-wound at Trafalgar. On its breast are sewed three or four stars and orders of knighthood, now much dimmed by time and damp, but which glittered brightly enough on the battle-day to draw the fatal aim of a French marksman. The bullet-hole is visible on the shoulder, as well as a part of the golden tassels of an epaulet, the rest of which was shot away. Over the coat is laid a white waistcoat with a great blood-stain on it, out of which all the redness has utterly faded, leaving it of a dingy yellow line, in the threescore years since that blood gushed out. Yet it was once the reddest blood in England,— Nelson's blood!

But the English love for hero-worship is filled to the brim with everything they understand about Lord Nelson's character. Next to the Painted Hall is a smaller room, its walls entirely covered with images of the great Admiral's achievements. We see the frail, passionate man in all the most significant moments of his career, from his encounter with a polar bear to his death at Trafalgar, flickering around the room like a blue, glowing flame. No Briton walks into that room without feeling a surge of pride, transforming into a hero, no matter how dull their mind, tough their heart, or unexcitable their usual mood. To be honest, I myself, though from a different background, have felt deeply moved by the inspiring memories evoked there, recognizing that Nelson infused his life with a kind of symbolic poetry that I had just as much right to appreciate as these sturdy islanders. Cool and analytical as I tried to be, I enjoyed their burst of genuine outrage when a visitor (not an American, thank goodness) pointed his walking stick almost into Nelson's face in one of the paintings, and the onlookers immediately flared up like hot coals, ready to consume the offender in their anger had he not made a hasty exit. But the most revered items are two of Nelson's coats, displayed in separate glass cases. One is the coat he wore at the Battle of the Nile, now sadly damaged by moths, which will eventually destroy it unless its caretakers preserve it like we do Washington's military uniform, by occasionally baking it in an oven. The other is the coat in which he received his fatal wound at Trafalgar. On its front are sewn three or four stars and decorations of knighthood, now much faded by time and moisture, but which shone bright enough on the day of battle to attract the deadly aim of a French marksman. The bullet hole is visible on the shoulder, along with part of the golden tassels of an epaulet, the remainder of which was shot away. Over the coat is a white waistcoat stained with blood, from which all color has completely faded, leaving it a dingy yellow line, in the sixty years since that blood flowed out. Yet it was once the reddest blood in England—Nelson's blood!

The hospital stands close adjacent to the town of Greenwich, which will always retain a kind of festal aspect in my memory, in consequence of my having first become acquainted with it on Easter Monday. Till a few years ago, the first three days of Easter were a carnival season in this old town, during which the idle and disreputable part of London poured itself into the streets like an inundation of the Thames, as unclean as that turbid mixture of the offscourings of the vast city, and overflowing with its grimy pollution whatever rural innocence, if any, might be found in the suburban neighborhood. This festivity was called Greenwich Fair, the final one of which, in an immemorial succession, it was my fortune to behold.

The hospital is located right next to the town of Greenwich, which will always have a festival vibe in my memory because I first got to know it on Easter Monday. Until a few years ago, the first three days of Easter were a carnival season in this old town, during which the idle and disreputable people from London filled the streets like a flood from the Thames, as dirty as that mixed mess of refuse from the big city, and spilling over with its grimy pollution whatever rural innocence might have been found in the nearby suburbs. This celebration was called Greenwich Fair, and it was the last one of its long-standing tradition that I was lucky enough to see.

If I had bethought myself of going through the fair with a note-book and pencil, jotting down all the prominent objects, I doubt not that the result might have been a sketch of English life quite as characteristic and worthy of historical preservation as an account of the Roman Carnival. Having neglected to do so, I remember little more than a confusion of unwashed and shabbily dressed people, intermixed with some smarter figures, but, on the whole, presenting a mobbish appearance such as we never see in our own country. It taught me to understand why Shakespeare, in speaking of a crowd, so often alludes to its attribute of evil odor. The common people of England, I am afraid, have no daily familiarity with even so necessary a thing as a wash-bowl, not to mention a bathing-tub. And furthermore, it is one mighty difference between them and us, that every man and woman on our side of the water has a working-day suit and a holiday suit, and is occasionally as fresh as a rose, whereas, in the good old country, the griminess of his labor or squalid habits clings forever to the individual, and gets to be a part of his personal substance. These are broad facts, involving great corollaries and dependencies. There are really, if you stop to think about it, few sadder spectacles in the world than a ragged coat, or a soiled and shabby gown, at a festival.

If I had thought to walk through the fair with a notebook and pencil, noting down all the key sights, I’m sure the outcome would have been a depiction of English life just as characteristic and deserving of historical preservation as an account of the Roman Carnival. Since I didn’t do that, I remember little more than a jumble of unwashed and poorly dressed people, mixed in with a few smarter individuals, but overall, presenting a chaotic scene that we never see in our own country. It helped me understand why Shakespeare often refers to the bad smell of crowds. I’m afraid the common people of England aren’t used to even the basic necessity of a washbasin, let alone a bathtub. Moreover, a significant difference between them and us is that everyone on our side of the ocean has both a work outfit and a holiday outfit, and can occasionally look as fresh as a daisy. Meanwhile, in the old country, the dirt from their labor or their shabby habits sticks to them permanently, becoming part of who they are. These are major realities, with significant implications and consequences. Honestly, if you think about it, there are few sadder sights in the world than a ragged coat or a soiled, shabby dress at a celebration.

This unfragrant crowd was exceedingly dense, being welded together, as it were, in the street through which we strove to make our way. On either side were oyster-stands, stalls of oranges (a very prevalent fruit in England, where they give the withered ones a guise of freshness by boiling them), and booths covered with old sail-cloth, in which the commodity that most attracted the eye was gilt gingerbread. It was so completely enveloped in Dutch gilding that I did not at first recognize an old acquaintance, but wondered what those golden crowns and images could be. There were likewise drums and other toys for small children, and a variety of showy and worthless articles for children of a larger growth; though it perplexed me to imagine who, in such a mob, could have the innocent taste to desire playthings, or the money to pay for them. Not that I have a right to license the mob, on my own knowledge, of being any less innocent than a set of cleaner and better dressed people might have been; for, though one of them stole my pocket-handkerchief, I could not but consider it fair game, under the circumstances, and was grateful to the thief for sparing me my purse. They were quiet, civil, and remarkably good-humored, making due allowance for the national gruffness; there was no riot, no tumultuous swaying to and fro of the mass, such as I have often noted in an American crowd, no noise of voices, except frequent bursts of laughter, hoarse or shrill, and a widely diffused, inarticulate murmur, resembling nothing so much as the rumbling of the tide among the arches of London Bridge. What immensely perplexed me was a sharp, angry sort of rattle, in all quarters, far off and close at hand, and sometimes right at my own back, where it sounded as if the stout fabric of my English surtout had been ruthlessly rent in twain; and everybody's clothes, all over the fair, were evidently being torn asunder in the same way. By and by, I discovered that this strange noise was produced by a little instrument called "The Fun of the Fair,"—a sort of rattle, consisting of a wooden wheel, the cogs of which turn against a thin slip of wood, and so produce a rasping sound when drawn smartly against a person's back. The ladies draw their rattles against the backs of their male friends (and everybody passes for a friend at Greenwich Fair), and the young men return the compliment on the broad British backs of the ladies; and all are bound by immemorial custom to take it in good part and be merry at the joke. As it was one of my prescribed official duties to give an account of such mechanical contrivances as might be unknown in my own country, I have thought it right to be thus particular in describing the Fun of the Fair.

This crowd had no scent and was incredibly dense, almost fused together in the street we were trying to navigate. On either side were oyster stands, stalls selling oranges (a popular fruit in England, where the old ones are boiled to appear fresh), and booths covered with old sailcloth, with the most eye-catching item being gilt gingerbread. It was so heavily coated in Dutch gold that I didn’t immediately recognize it and wondered what those golden crowns and figures could be. There were also drums and other toys for little kids, along with a range of flashy but useless items for older children. Still, I was puzzled about who in such a crowd would have the innocent taste to want toys or the money to buy them. Not that I have the right to judge the crowd as being less innocent than a cleaner and better-dressed group might have been; after all, one of them did steal my handkerchief, but I figured it was fair game under the circumstances and was thankful the thief spared my wallet. They were quiet, polite, and surprisingly cheerful, keeping in mind the national gruffness; there was no riot, no chaotic swaying of the mass like I often observed in American crowds, no loud voices except for frequent bursts of laughter, hoarse or shrill, along with a low, inarticulate murmur, resembling the sound of the tide rumbling under London Bridge. What really puzzled me was a sharp, angry rattling noise coming from all around, both far away and right behind me, sounding as if my heavy English coat had been viciously torn apart; it seemed like everyone’s clothes at the fair were being shredded in the same way. Eventually, I figured out that this strange sound was made by a little device called "The Fun of the Fair," a rattle that consisted of a wooden wheel with cogs that turn against a thin piece of wood, producing a rasping noise when drawn swiftly against someone's back. The ladies use their rattles on the backs of their male friends (and at Greenwich Fair, everyone is considered a friend), and the young men return the favor on the broad British backs of the ladies; it’s a tradition to take it in good humor and enjoy the joke. Since it was part of my official duties to report on such mechanical devices that might be unfamiliar in my own country, I thought it was important to describe the Fun of the Fair in this detail.

But this was far from being the sole amusement. There were theatrical booths, in front of which were pictorial representations of the scenes to be enacted within; and anon a drummer emerged from one of them, thumping on a terribly lax drum, and followed by the entire dramatis personae, who ranged themselves on a wooden platform in front of the theatre. They were dressed in character, but wofully shabby, with very dingy and wrinkled white tights, threadbare cotton-velvets, crumpled silks, and crushed muslin, and all the gloss and glory gone out of their aspect and attire, seen thus in the broad daylight and after a long series of performances. They sang a song together, and withdrew into the theatre, whither the public were invited to follow them at the inconsiderable cost of a penny a ticket. Before another booth stood a pair of brawny fighting-men, displaying their muscle, and soliciting patronage for an exhibition of the noble British art of pugilism. There were pictures of giants, monsters, and outlandish beasts, most prodigious, to be sure, and worthy of all admiration, unless the artist had gone incomparably beyond his subject. Jugglers proclaimed aloud the miracles which they were prepared to work; and posture-makers dislocated every joint of their bodies and tied their limbs into inextricable knots, wherever they could find space to spread a little square of carpet on the ground. In the midst of the confusion, while everybody was treading on his neighbor's toes, some little boys were very solicitous to brush your boots. These lads, I believe, are a product of modern society,—at least, no older than the time of Gay, who celebrates their origin in his "Trivia"; but in most other respects the scene reminded me of Bunyan's description of Vanity Fair,—nor is it at all improbable that the Pilgrim may have been a merry-maker here, in his wild youth.

But this was far from the only entertainment. There were theater booths, in front of which were pictures depicting the scenes to be performed inside. Soon a drummer came out from one of them, beating a very limp drum, followed by the entire cast, who lined up on a wooden platform in front of the theater. They were dressed in character but sadly shabby, wearing dingy and wrinkled white tights, worn-out cotton velvets, crumpled silks, and squashed muslin, completely stripped of their shine and glory, especially in the harsh daylight after a long run of performances. They sang a song together and then went back inside the theater, inviting the public to follow them for the small price of a penny a ticket. In front of another booth stood a pair of muscular fighters, showing off their strength and asking for support for a display of the noble British art of boxing. There were images of giants, monsters, and bizarre creatures, truly impressive and deserving of admiration, unless the artist had vastly exaggerated. Jugglers loudly proclaimed the tricks they were ready to perform; and contortionists twisted every joint of their bodies and tied their limbs into impossible knots wherever they could find room to lay down a little square of carpet on the ground. In the midst of the chaos, with everyone stepping on each other's toes, some little boys were eagerly trying to polish your shoes. I believe these boys are a product of modern society—at least dating back to the time of Gay, who mentions their beginnings in his "Trivia"; but in many other ways, the scene reminded me of Bunyan's description of Vanity Fair—it's not far-fetched to think the Pilgrim might have joined in the fun here during his wild youth.

It seemed very singular—though, of course, I immediately classified it as an English characteristic—to see a great many portable weighing-machines, the owners of which cried out, continually and amain, "Come, know your weight! Come, come, know your weight to-day! Come, know your weight!" and a multitude of people, mostly large in the girth, were moved by this vociferation to sit down in the machines. I know not whether they valued themselves on their beef, and estimated their standing as members of society at so much a pound; but I shall set it down as a national peculiarity, and a symbol of the prevalence of the earthly over the spiritual element, that Englishmen are wonderfully bent on knowing how solid and physically ponderous they are.

It felt quite unusual—though I immediately recognized it as an English trait—to see a lot of portable weighing scales, with their owners constantly shouting, "Come, check your weight! Come, come, check your weight today! Come, check your weight!" A crowd of people, mostly on the heavier side, was drawn by this shouting to sit down on the scales. I’m not sure if they took pride in their size and valued themselves based on their weight in society; but I’ll note it as a national characteristic and a sign of how much the material outweighs the spiritual, that English people are incredibly focused on knowing how solid and heavy they are.

On the whole, having an appetite for the brown bread and the tripe and sausages of life, as well as for its nicer cates and dainties, I enjoyed the scene, and was amused at the sight of a gruff old Greenwich pensioner, who, forgetful of the sailor-frolics of his young days, stood looking with grim disapproval at all these vanities. Thus we squeezed our way through the mob-jammed town, and emerged into the Park, where, likewise, we met a great many merry-makers, but with freer space for their gambols than in the streets. We soon found ourselves the targets for a cannonade with oranges (most of them in a decayed condition), which went humming past our ears from the vantage-ground of neighboring hillocks, sometimes hitting our sacred persons with an inelastic thump. This was one of the privileged freedoms of the time, and was nowise to be resented, except by returning the salute. Many persons were running races, hand in hand, down the declivities, especially that steepest one on the summit of which stands the world-central Observatory, and (as in the race of life) the partners were usually male and female, and often caught a tumble together before reaching the bottom of the hill. Hereabouts we were pestered and haunted by two young girls, the eldest not more than thirteen, teasing us to buy matches; and finding no market for their commodity, the taller one suddenly turned a somerset before our faces, and rolled heels over head from top to bottom of the hill on which we stood. Then, scrambling up the acclivity, the topsy-turvy trollop offered us her matches again, as demurely as if she had never flung aside her equilibrium; so that, dreading a repetition of the feat, we gave her sixpence and an admonition, and enjoined her never to do so any more.

Overall, having a taste for the regular stuff like brown bread, tripe, and sausages, as well as the nicer treats and snacks, I enjoyed the scene and found it amusing to see a grumpy old Greenwich pensioner who, forgetting the playful antics of his younger days, stood there looking disapprovingly at all these frivolities. We pushed our way through the crowded town and came out into the Park, where we also encountered many fun-seekers, but they had more room to play than in the streets. Soon enough, we became targets of a barrage of oranges (most of them pretty rotten) that whizzed past our heads from nearby hills, occasionally smacking us with a stiff thud. This was one of the liberties of the time, and it wasn't something to complain about, except by returning the gesture. Many people were racing hand in hand down the slopes, especially that steep one at the top where the major Observatory stands, and (like in the race of life) the pairs were mostly male and female, often tumbling together before reaching the bottom of the hill. Around here, we were annoyed and followed by two young girls, the oldest no more than thirteen, begging us to buy matches; and after finding no buyers for their goods, the taller girl suddenly did a somersault right in front of us, rolling down the hill from top to bottom. Then, climbing back up, the upside-down girl offered us her matches again, looking as innocent as if she had never lost her balance; so, fearing a repeat of her stunt, we gave her sixpence and warned her not to do that again.

The most curious amusement that we witnessed here—or anywhere else, indeed—was an ancient and hereditary pastime called "Kissing in the Ring." I shall describe the sport exactly as I saw it, although an English friend assures me that there are certain ceremonies with a handkerchief, which make it much more decorous and graceful. A handkerchief, indeed! There was no such thing in the crowd, except it were the one which they had just filched out of my pocket. It is one of the simplest kinds of games, needing little or no practice to make the player altogether perfect; and the manner of it is this. A ring is formed (in the present case, it was of large circumference and thickly gemmed around with faces, mostly on the broad grin), into the centre of which steps an adventurous youth, and, looking round the circle, selects whatever maiden may most delight his eye. He presents his hand (which she is bound to accept), leads her into the centre, salutes her on the lips, and retires, taking his stand in the expectant circle. The girl, in her turn, throws a favorable regard on some fortunate young man, offers her hand to lead him forth, makes him happy with a maidenly kiss, and withdraws to hide her blushes, if any there be, among the simpering faces in the ring; while the favored swain loses no time in transferring her salute to the prettiest and plumpest among the many mouths that are primming themselves in anticipation. And thus the thing goes on, till all the festive throng are inwreathed and intertwined into an endless and inextricable chain of kisses; though, indeed, it smote me with compassion to reflect that some forlorn pair of lips might be left out, and never know the triumph of a salute, after throwing aside so many delicate reserves for the sake of winning it. If the young men had any chivalry, there was a fair chance to display it by kissing the homeliest damsel in the circle.

The most curious entertainment we saw here—or anywhere, really—was an old and traditional game called "Kissing in the Ring." I'll describe the game exactly as I witnessed it, even though an English friend tells me there are some rituals involving a handkerchief that make it much more proper and graceful. A handkerchief, really? There wasn't one in the crowd, except for the one someone just stole from my pocket. It’s one of the simplest types of games, needing little or no practice for the players to become quite good at it. Here’s how it works: a ring is formed (in this case, it was large and filled with faces, mostly grinning), and into the center steps a daring young man, who then chooses whichever girl catches his eye. He extends his hand (which she has to take), brings her into the center, kisses her on the lips, and then goes back to his spot in the eager circle. In turn, the girl looks for some lucky guy, offers her hand to lead him out, gives him a sweet kiss, and then retreats to hide her blushes, if she has any, among the smiling faces in the ring. Meanwhile, the lucky guy quickly passes her kiss onto the prettiest and plumpest of the many mouths waiting in anticipation. And so it continues, until the whole cheerful group is caught up in an endless and tangled chain of kisses; though I felt a twinge of sympathy thinking about some lonely pair of lips that might miss out and never experience the joy of a kiss after casting aside so many delicate reservations to try to earn one. If the young men had any sense of chivalry, this was a great chance to show it by kissing the least attractive girl in the circle.

To be frank, however, at the first glance, and to my American eye, they looked all homely alike, and the chivalry that I suggest is more than I could have been capable of, at any period of my life. They seemed to be country-lasses, of sturdy and wholesome aspect, with coarse-grained, cabbage-rosy cheeks, and, I am willing to suppose, a stout texture of moral principle, such as would bear a good deal of rough usage without suffering much detriment. But how unlike the trim little damsels of my native land! I desire above all things to be courteous; but, since the plain truth must be told, the soil and climate of England produce feminine beauty as rarely as they do delicate fruit, and though admirable specimens of both are to be met with, they are the hot-house ameliorations of refined society, and apt, moreover, to relapse into the coarseness of the original stock. The men are manlike, but the women are not beautiful, though the female Bull be well enough adapted to the male. To return to the lasses of Greenwich Fair, their charms were few, and their behavior, perhaps, not altogether commendable; and yet it was impossible not to feel a degree of faith in their innocent intentions, with such a half-bashful zest and entire simplicity did they keep up their part of the game. It put the spectator in good-humor to look at them, because there was still something of the old Arcadian life, the secure freedom of the antique age, in their way of surrendering their lips to strangers, as if there were no evil or impurity in the world. As for the young men, they were chiefly specimens of the vulgar sediment of London life, often shabbily genteel, rowdyish, pale, wearing the unbrushed coat, unshifted linen, and unwashed faces of yesterday, as well as the haggardness of last night's jollity in a gin-shop. Gathering their character from these tokens, I wondered whether there were any reasonable prospect of their fair partners returning to their rustic homes with as much innocence (whatever were its amount or quality) as they brought, to Greenwich Fair, in spite of the perilous familiarity established by Kissing in the Ring.

To be honest, though, at first glance, and for me as an American, they all looked pretty similar and the kind of chivalry I’m talking about is something I couldn’t have mustered at any point in my life. They appeared to be country girls, strong and wholesome-looking, with rough, rosy cheeks, and I’m willing to assume they had a solid moral character that could withstand a lot without getting significantly harmed. But they were nothing like the neat little girls from my home country! I really want to be courteous, but the plain truth is that the soil and climate of England produce feminine beauty as rarely as they do delicate fruit, and while you can find admirable examples of both, they’re often the greenhouse versions of a refined society and tend to revert back to the coarseness of their original roots. The men are manly, but the women aren’t beautiful, even if the female Bull seems well-suited to the male. Back to the girls at Greenwich Fair, their charms were limited, and their behavior maybe not entirely praiseworthy; yet it was hard not to feel a sense of trust in their innocent intentions, as they played their part in the event with a half-shy eagerness and total simplicity. It put spectators in a good mood to watch them, because there was still a trace of the old Arcadian life, the carefree freedom of a bygone era, in the way they offered their lips to strangers as if there was no evil or impurity in the world. As for the young men, they mostly embodied the rough edges of London life, often poorly dressed yet trying to appear classy, rowdy, pale, with unbrushed coats, crumpled shirts, and faces that looked like they’d just come from yesterday’s drinking at a gin shop. Judging by these signs, I wondered if there was any real chance of their lovely partners returning to their rural homes with as much innocence (whatever that might mean) as they brought to Greenwich Fair, despite the risky intimacy promoted by Kissing in the Ring.

The manifold disorders resulting from the fair, at which a vast city was brought into intimate relations with a comparatively rural district, have at length led to its suppression; this was the very last celebration of it, and brought to a close the broad-mouthed merriment of many hundred years. Thus my poor sketch, faint as its colors are, may acquire some little value in the reader's eyes from the consideration that no observer of the coming time will ever have an opportunity to give a better. I should find it difficult to believe, however, that the queer pastime just described, or any moral mischief to which that and other customs might pave the way, can have led to the overthrow of Greenwich Fair; for it has often seemed to me that Englishmen of station and respectability, unless of a peculiarly philanthropic turn, have neither any faith in the feminine purity of the lower orders of their countrywomen, nor the slightest value for it, allowing its possible existence. The distinction of ranks is so marked, that the English cottage damsel holds a position somewhat analogous to that of the negro girl in our Southern States. Hence cones inevitable detriment to the moral condition of those men themselves, who forget that the humblest woman has a right and a duty to hold herself in the same sanctity as the highest. The subject cannot well be discussed in these pages; but I offer it as a serious conviction, from what I have been able to observe, that the England of to-day is the unscrupulous old England of Tom Jones and Joseph Andrews, Humphrey Clinker and Roderick Random; and in our refined era, just the same as at that more free-spoken epoch, this singular people has a certain contempt for any fine-strained purity, any special squeamishness, as they consider it, on the part of an ingenuous youth. They appear to look upon it as a suspicious phenomenon in the masculine character.

The various issues that arose from the fair, which connected a large city with a mostly rural area, have finally led to its cancellation; this was the very last time it was celebrated, marking the end of centuries of widespread revelry. So, while my poor sketch may be faint in its details, it might hold some value for readers because no future observer will have the chance to create a better one. However, it's hard for me to believe that the odd activities just described, or any moral issues those and other customs might lead to, were responsible for the end of Greenwich Fair. It has often seemed to me that respectable English people, unless they have a particularly charitable nature, have little faith in or regard for the moral purity of their working-class countrywomen, even if they acknowledge it might exist. The social class divide is so pronounced that the English cottage girl has a status somewhat similar to that of a Black girl in the Southern States. As a result, this leads to inevitable harm to the moral standing of those men themselves, who forget that even the humblest woman has the right and obligation to uphold her dignity just like the highest among them. This topic can't be thoroughly discussed here, but I feel compelled to express, based on my observations, that today's England is much like the unscrupulous old England depicted in Tom Jones and Joseph Andrews, Humphrey Clinker and Roderick Random; and in our more polished age, just as in that more candid time, this unique nation still holds a certain disdain for any rigid standards of purity or special delicacy, which they view as a flaw in a young man's character. They seem to see it as a suspicious trait in masculinity.

Nevertheless, I by no means take upon me to affirm that English morality, as regards the phase here alluded to, is really at a lower point than our own. Assuredly, I hope so, because, making a higher pretension, or, at all events, more carefully hiding whatever may be amiss, we are either better than they, or necessarily a great deal worse. It impressed me that their open avowal and recognition of immoralities served to throw the disease to the surface, where it might be more effectually dealt with, and leave a sacred interior not utterly profaned, instead of turning its poison back among the inner vitalities of the character, at the imminent risk of corrupting them all. Be that as it may, these Englishmen are certainly a franker and simpler people than ourselves, from peer to peasant; but if we can take it as compensatory on our part (which I leave to be considered) that they owe those noble and manly qualities to a coarser grain in their nature, and that, with a finer one in ours, we shall ultimately acquire a marble polish of which they are unsusceptible, I believe that this may be the truth.

However, I definitely don’t claim that English morality, in the aspect mentioned here, is actually lower than our own. I certainly hope that’s not the case because, if we’re making a bigger claim or, at the very least, more carefully concealing whatever flaws we have, we are either better than they are or, unfortunately, much worse. It struck me that their open acknowledgment of immoral behavior brings the issue to the surface, where it can be addressed more effectively, leaving their core values mostly intact, rather than letting the negativity fester within, which could ultimately corrupt everything. That said, these English people are certainly more straightforward and genuine than we are, from nobility to commoner; but if we can justify that they possess those admirable qualities due to a rougher nature, and that, with our more refined characteristics, we will eventually develop a polish that they can’t achieve, I think that could very well be true.





UP THE THAMES.

The upper portion of Greenwich (where my last article left me loitering) is a cheerful, comely, old-fashioned town, the peculiarities of which, if there be any, have passed out of my remembrance. As you descend towards the Thames, the streets get meaner, and the shabby and sunken houses, elbowing one another for frontage, bear the sign-boards of beer-shops and eating-rooms, with especial promises of whitebait and other delicacies in the fishing line. You observe, also, a frequent announcement of "The Gardens" in the rear; although, estimating the capacity of the premises by their external compass, the entire sylvan charm and shadowy seclusion of such blissful resorts must be limited within a small back-yard. These places of cheap sustenance and recreation depend for support upon the innumerable pleasure-parties who come from London Bridge by steamer, at a fare of a few pence, and who get as enjoyable a meal for a shilling a head as the Ship Hotel would afford a gentleman for a guinea.

The upper part of Greenwich (where my last article left me hanging around) is a lively, charming, old-fashioned town, the quirks of which, if there are any, I can’t remember. As you head down towards the Thames, the streets become less pleasant, and the rundown, dilapidated houses, crowded together for visibility, display signs for pubs and eateries, especially boasting whitebait and other seafood treats. You also notice frequent mentions of "The Gardens" in the back; however, judging by their size from the outside, the entire peaceful charm and shady retreat of these delightful spots must be confined to a small backyard. These budget-friendly places for food and fun rely on the countless groups of people who come from London Bridge by boat, paying just a few cents, and who get as satisfying a meal for a shilling each as the Ship Hotel would offer a gentleman for a guinea.

The steamers, which are constantly smoking their pipes up and down the Thames, offer much the most agreeable mode of getting to London. At least, it might be exceedingly agreeable, except for the myriad floating particles of soot from the stove-pipe, and the heavy heat of midsummer sunshine on the unsheltered deck, or the chill, misty air draught of a cloudy day, and the spiteful little showers of rain that may spatter down upon you at any moment, whatever the promise of the sky; besides which there is some slight inconvenience from the inexhaustible throng of passengers, who scarcely allow you standing-room, nor so much as a breath of unappropriated air, and never a chance to sit down. If these difficulties, added to the possibility of getting your pocket picked, weigh little with you, the panorama along the shores of the memorable river, and the incidents and shows of passing life upon its bosom, render the trip far preferable to the brief yet tiresome shoot along the railway track. On one such voyage, a regatta of wherries raced past us, and at once involved every soul on board our steamer in the tremendous excitement of the struggle. The spectacle was but a moment within our view, and presented nothing more than a few light skiffs, in each of which sat a single rower, bare-armed, and with little apparel, save a shirt and drawers, pale, anxious, with every muscle on the stretch, and plying his oars in such fashion that the boat skimmed along with the aerial celerity of a swallow. I wondered at myself for so immediately catching an interest in the affair, which seemed to contain no very exalted rivalship of manhood; but, whatever the kind of battle or the prize of victory, it stirs one's sympathy immensely, and is even awful, to behold the rare sight of a man thoroughly in earnest, doing his best, putting forth all there is in him, and staking his very soul (as these rowers appeared willing to do) on the issue of the contest. It was the seventy-fourth annual regatta of the Free Watermen of Greenwich, and announced itself as under the patronage of the Lord Mayor and other distinguished individuals, at whose expense, I suppose, a prize-boat was offered to the conqueror, and some small amounts of money to the inferior competitors.

The steamers, constantly puffing smoke up and down the Thames, provide by far the most pleasant way to get to London. Well, it could be very enjoyable, if it weren't for the countless bits of soot from the chimney, the sweltering heat of summer sun on the exposed deck, or the cold, misty breeze on a cloudy day, not to mention the annoying little rain showers that can hit you at any moment, regardless of what the sky looks like. Plus, there's the slight issue of the endless crowd of passengers, leaving barely enough room to stand, and not even a breath of fresh air, let alone a chance to sit down. If these inconveniences, along with the chance of getting your pocket picked, don’t bother you too much, the views along the shores of the famous river and the sights and sounds of life on it make the trip far better than the quick but exhausting ride along the train tracks. On one such journey, a race of small boats sped past us, drawing every person on our steamer into the thrilling excitement of the competition. The scene lasted just a moment, featuring only a few light rowboats, each with a single rower, bare-armed and dressed minimally in a shirt and shorts, looking pale and tense as every muscle was fully engaged, rowing in a way that made their boats glide along like swallows in the air. I was surprised at how quickly I got invested in the event, which didn’t seem to feature much grand rivalry. But regardless of the type of struggle or the prize at stake, it really stirs up one's emotions to witness someone completely earnest, giving their all, and seemingly risking everything (as these rowers appeared willing to do) in the outcome of the race. It was the seventy-fourth annual regatta of the Free Watermen of Greenwich, sponsored by the Lord Mayor and other prominent figures, who likely covered the costs of a prize boat for the winner, along with some small cash for the lesser competitors.

The aspect of London along the Thanes, below Bridge, as it is called, is by no means so impressive as it ought to be, considering what peculiar advantages are offered for the display of grand and stately architecture by the passage of a river through the midst of a great city. It seems, indeed, as if the heart of London had been cleft open for the mere purpose of showing how rotten and drearily mean it had become. The shore is lined with the shabbiest, blackest, and ugliest buildings that can be imagined, decayed warehouses with blind windows, and wharves that look ruinous; insomuch that, had I known nothing more of the world's metropolis, I might have fancied that it had already experienced the downfall which I have heard commercial and financial prophets predict for it, within the century. And the muddy tide of the Thames, reflecting nothing, and hiding a million of unclean secrets within its breast,—a sort of guilty conscience, as it were, unwholesome with the rivulets of sin that constantly flow into it,—is just the dismal stream to glide by such a city. The surface, to be sure, displays no lack of activity, being fretted by the passage of a hundred steamers and covered with a good deal of shipping, but mostly of a clumsier build than I had been accustomed to see in the Mersey: a fact which I complacently attributed to the smaller number of American clippers in the Thames, and the less prevalent influence of American example in refining away the broad-bottomed capacity of the old Dutch or English models.

The area of London along the Thames, below what’s called Bridge, is not nearly as impressive as it should be, given the unique opportunities for showcasing magnificent architecture that arise from a river flowing through a major city. It almost feels like the heart of London has been opened up just to reveal how decayed and bleak it has become. The banks are lined with the most rundown, dark, and unattractive buildings imaginable—crumbling warehouses with boarded-up windows and docks that look dilapidated; so much so that if I hadn’t known anything else about the world's capital, I might have thought it had already faced the decline that I've heard financial experts predict it would see within the century. The muddy tide of the Thames reflects nothing and conceals countless dirty secrets—like a guilty conscience, tainted by the streams of sin that continuously flow into it—making it the perfect grim river for such a city. The surface, of course, is full of activity, bustling with the movement of numerous steamers and covered with several vessels, but mostly of a bulkier design than I’m used to seeing on the Mersey; a detail I happily attributed to the fewer American clippers in the Thames and the less significant influence of the American style in refining the broad-bottomed characteristics of the older Dutch or English models.

About midway between Greenwich and London Bridge, at a rude landing-place on the left bank of the river, the steamer rings its bell and makes a momentary pause in front of a large circular structure, where it may be worth our while to scramble ashore. It indicates the locality of one of those prodigious practical blunders that would supply John Bull with a topic of inexhaustible ridicule, if his cousin Jonathan had committed them, but of which he himself perpetrates ten to our one in the mere wantonness of wealth that lacks better employment. The circular building covers the entrance to the Thames Tunnel, and is surmounted by a dome of glass, so as to throw daylight down into the great depth at which the passage of the river commences. Descending a wearisome succession of staircases, we at last find ourselves, still in the broad noon, standing before a closed door, on opening which we behold the vista of an arched corridor that extends into everlasting midnight. In these days, when glass has been applied to so many new purposes, it is a pity that the architect had not thought of arching portions of his abortive tunnel with immense blocks of the lucid substance, over which the dusky Thames would have flowed like a cloud, making the sub-fluvial avenue only a little gloomier than a street of upper London. At present, it is illuminated at regular intervals by jets of gas, not very brilliantly, yet with lustre enough to show the damp plaster of the ceiling and walls, and the massive stone pavement, the crevices of which are oozy with moisture, not from the incumbent river, but from hidden springs in the earth's deeper heart. There are two parallel corridors, with a wall between, for the separate accommodation of the double throng of foot-passengers, equestrians, and vehicles of all kinds, which was expected to roll and reverberate continually through the Tunnel. Only one of them has ever been opened, and its echoes are but feebly awakened by infrequent footfalls.

About halfway between Greenwich and London Bridge, at a rough landing spot on the left bank of the river, the steamer rings its bell and briefly stops in front of a large circular building, where it might be worth it to scramble ashore. It marks the site of one of those huge practical mistakes that would give John Bull endless material for ridicule if his cousin Jonathan had made them, but which he himself creates ten times more due to a careless wealth that has nothing better to do. The circular building covers the entrance to the Thames Tunnel and is topped with a glass dome that lets daylight into the deep area where the river crossing begins. After descending a tiring series of staircases, we finally find ourselves, still in broad daylight, standing before a closed door. When we open it, we get a view of an arched corridor that stretches into perpetual darkness. In these times, when glass has been used for so many new things, it's a shame the architect didn't think to arch parts of his failed tunnel with large blocks of clear material, allowing the dark Thames to flow over them like a cloud, making the underwater passage only a bit gloomier than an upper London street. Right now, it’s lit at regular intervals by gas jets, not very brightly, but just enough to reveal the damp plaster on the ceiling and walls, and the solid stone pavement, whose cracks are soaked with moisture, not from the river above, but from hidden springs deep in the earth. There are two parallel corridors, with a wall in between, intended for the separate use of the double crowd of pedestrians, riders, and all kinds of vehicles that were expected to continuously travel through the Tunnel. Only one of them has ever been opened, and its echoes are faintly stirred by occasional footsteps.

Yet there seem to be people who spend their lives here, and who probably blink like owls, when, once or twice a year, perhaps, they happen to climb into the sunshine. All along the corridor, which I believe to be a mile in extent, we see stalls or shops in little alcoves, kept principally by women; they were of a ripe age, I was glad to observe, and certainly robbed England of none of its very moderate supply of feminine loveliness by their deeper than tomb-like interment. As you approach (and they are so accustomed to the dusky gaslight that they read all your characteristics afar off), they assail you with hungry entreaties to buy some of their merchandise, holding forth views of the Tunnel put up in cases of Derbyshire spar, with a magnifying-glass at one end to make the vista more effective. They offer you, besides, cheap jewelry, sunny topazes and resplendent emeralds for sixpence, and diamonds as big as the Kohi-i-noor at a not much heavier cost, together with a multifarious trumpery which has died out of the upper world to reappear in this Tartarean bazaar. That you may fancy yourself still in the realms of the living, they urge you to partake of cakes, candy, ginger-beer, and such small refreshment, more suitable, however, for the shadowy appetite of ghosts than for the sturdy stomachs of Englishmen. The most capacious of the shops contains a dioramic exhibition of cities and scenes in the daylight world, with a dreary glimmer of gas among them all; so that they serve well enough to represent the dim, unsatisfactory remembrances that dead people might be supposed to retain from their past lives, mixing them up with the ghastliness of their unsubstantial state. I dwell the more upon these trifles, and do my best to give them a mockery of importance, because, if these are nothing, then all this elaborate contrivance and mighty piece of work has been wrought in vain. The Englishman has burrowed under the bed of his great river, and set ships of two or three thousand tons a-rolling over his head, only to provide new sites for a few old women to sell cakes and ginger-beer!

Yet there seem to be people who spend their lives here, and who probably blink like owls when, once or twice a year, they happen to climb into the sunlight. All along the corridor, which I think is about a mile long, we see stalls or shops in small alcoves, mostly run by women; they were at a mature age, I was pleased to notice, and definitely didn't take away from England’s very modest supply of feminine beauty with their tomb-like entrapment. As you get closer (and they are so used to the dim gaslight that they can read all your traits from a distance), they bombard you with eager requests to buy some of their items, showcasing views of the Tunnel displayed in cases made of Derbyshire spar, complete with a magnifying glass at one end to enhance the view. They also offer you cheap jewelry, sunny topazes and shiny emeralds for sixpence, and diamonds as big as the Koh-i-noor for not much more, along with a variety of trinkets that have faded away from the upper world to reappear in this underground market. To help you feel like you’re still in the land of the living, they invite you to enjoy cakes, candy, ginger beer, and small snacks, which are more suitable for the ghostly appetites of spirits than for the hearty stomachs of Englishmen. The largest of the shops features a diorama of cities and scenes from the daytime world, with a dull glimmer of gas among them all; so it serves well enough to represent the vague, unsatisfactory memories that dead people might be thought to keep from their past lives, blending them with the eeriness of their intangible state. I emphasize these little details and try to give them a sense of importance because if these are meaningless, then all this elaborate construction and massive effort have been pointless. The Englishman has dug under the bed of his great river and set ships of two or three thousand tons rolling over his head, only to create new spots for a few old women to sell cakes and ginger beer!

Yet the conception was a grand one; and though it has proved an absolute failure, swallowing an immensity of toil and money, with annual returns hardly sufficient to keep the pavement free from the ooze of subterranean springs, yet it needs, I presume, only an expenditure three or four (or, for aught I know, twenty) times as large, to make the enterprise brilliantly successful. The descent is so great from the bank of the river to its surface, and the Tunnel dips so profoundly under the river's bed, that the approaches on either side must commence a long way off, in order to render the entrance accessible to horsemen or vehicles; so that the larger part of the cost of the whole affair should have been expended on its margins. It has turned out a sublime piece of folly; and when the New-Zealander of distant ages shall have moralized sufficiently among the ruins of London Bridge, he will bethink himself that somewhere thereabout was the marvellous Tunnel, the very existence of which will seem to him as incredible as that of the hanging gardens of Babylon. But the Thames will long ago have broken through the massive arch, and choked up the corridors with mud and sand and with the large stones of the structure itself, intermixed with skeletons of drowned people, the rusty ironwork of sunken vessels, and the great many such precious and curious things as a river always contrives to hide in its bosom; the entrance will have been obliterated, and its very site forgotten beyond the memory of twenty generations of men, and the whole neighborhood be held a dangerous spot on account of the malaria; insomuch that the traveller will make but a brief and careless inquisition for the traces of the old wonder, and will stake his credit before the public, in some Pacific Monthly of that day, that the story of it is but a myth, though enriched with a spiritual profundity which he will proceed to unfold.

Yet the idea was grand; and even though it has turned out to be a complete failure, consuming a huge amount of effort and money, with annual returns barely enough to keep the pavement clear of the seepage from underground springs, it seems, I suppose, that it would only take an investment three or four (or, for all I know, twenty) times larger to make the project a stunning success. The drop from the riverbank to the water’s surface is so steep, and the Tunnel goes so deep beneath the riverbed, that the approaches on both sides have to start far back to make the entrance accessible for horses or vehicles; therefore, much of the total cost should have been spent on its ends. It has proven to be an extravagant piece of folly; and when the New Zealander of future ages reflects among the ruins of London Bridge, he will remember that somewhere around here was the incredible Tunnel, which will seem as unbelievable to him as the hanging gardens of Babylon. But the Thames will have long ago breached the massive arch, filling the corridors with mud, sand, and large stones from the structure itself, mixed with the skeletons of drowned people, rusty ironwork from sunken vessels, and all the precious and odd things that rivers manage to conceal; the entrance will have disappeared, and its exact location forgotten beyond the memory of twenty generations, with the entire area regarded as a dangerous place due to malaria; so much so that travelers will make only a brief, careless search for traces of the old wonder and will bet their reputation in some future Pacific Monthly that the story is merely a myth, though enriched with a spiritual depth that they will go on to explore.

Yet it is impossible (for a Yankee, at least) to see so much magnificent ingenuity thrown away, without trying to endow the unfortunate result with some kind of use, fulness, though perhaps widely different from the purpose of its original conception. In former ages, the mile-long corridors, with their numerous alcoves, might have been utilized as a series of dungeons, the fittest of all possible receptacles for prisoners of state. Dethroned monarchs and fallen statesmen would not have needed to remonstrate against a domicile so spacious, so deeply secluded from the world's scorn, and so admirably in accordance with their thenceforward sunless fortunes. An alcove here might have suited Sir Walter Raleigh better than that darksome hiding-place communicating with the great chamber in the Tower, pacing from end to end of which he meditated upon his "History of the World." His track would here have been straight and narrow, indeed, and would therefore have lacked somewhat of the freedom that his intellect demanded; and yet the length to which his footsteps might have travelled forth and retraced themselves would partly have harmonized his physical movement with the grand curves and planetary returns of his thought, through cycles of majestic periods. Having it in his mind to compose the world's history, methinks he could have asked no better retirement than such a cloister as this, insulated from all the seductions of mankind and womankind, deep beneath their mysteries and motives, down into the heart of things, full of personal reminiscences in order to the comprehensive measurement and verification of historic records, seeing into the secrets of human nature,—secrets that daylight never yet revealed to mortal,—but detecting their whole scope and purport with the infallible eyes of unbroken solitude and night. And then the shades of the old mighty men might have risen from their still profounder abodes and joined him in the dim corridor, treading beside him with an antique stateliness of mien, telling him in melancholy tones, grand, but always melancholy, of the greater ideas and purposes which their most renowned performances so imperfectly carried out, that, magnificent successes in the view of all posterity, they were but failures to those who planned them. As Raleigh was a navigator, Noah would have explained to him the peculiarities of construction that made the ark so seaworthy; as Raleigh was a statesman, Moses would have discussed with him the principles of laws and government; as Raleigh was a soldier, Caesar and Hannibal would have held debate in his presence, with this martial student for their umpire; as Raleigh was a poet, David, or whatever most illustrious bard he might call up, would have touched his harp, and made manifest all the true significance of the past by means of song and the subtle intelligences of music.

Yet it’s hard (at least for a Yankee) to see so much incredible creativity wasted without wanting to find some kind of use for the unfortunate outcome, even if it’s quite different from what it was originally meant for. In the past, the mile-long corridors, with their many alcoves, could have been used as a series of dungeons, perfectly suited for prisoners of state. Deposed kings and fallen politicians wouldn’t have needed to complain about a home so spacious, so hidden from the world’s scorn, and so fitting for their newfound dark fortunes. An alcove here might have suited Sir Walter Raleigh better than that gloomy hiding place connected to the great chamber in the Tower, where he paced back and forth thinking about his “History of the World.” His path would have been straight and narrow, indeed, lacking some of the freedom that his mind craved; yet the distance his footsteps could have traveled back and forth would have somewhat aligned his physical movement with the grand cycles and returns of his thoughts, through ages of majestic periods. With the intention of writing the world’s history, I think he could have asked for no better retreat than a cloister like this, isolated from all the enticements of humanity, deep beneath their mysteries and motivations, into the heart of things, full of personal memories, allowing for the thorough understanding and verification of historical records, gaining insight into the mysteries of human nature—mysteries that daylight has never revealed to anyone—but seeing their full scope and significance with the clear vision of uninterrupted solitude and night. And then the shades of the great men of old might have risen from their even deeper abodes and walked with him in the dim corridor, moving beside him with an ancient grace, telling him in somber tones—grand, yet always melancholic—about the greater ideas and intents that their most celebrated achievements so imperfectly fulfilled, which, while magnificent successes in the eyes of all future generations, were seen as failures by those who conceived them. Since Raleigh was a navigator, Noah would have explained to him the unique construction features that made the ark so seaworthy; since Raleigh was a statesman, Moses would have discussed the principles of law and governance with him; since Raleigh was a soldier, Caesar and Hannibal would have debated in his presence, with this martial student as their referee; and since Raleigh was a poet, David, or whatever great bard he could summon, would have played his harp, revealing all the true significance of the past through song and the subtle intelligence of music.

Meanwhile, I had forgotten that Sir Walter Raleigh's century knew nothing of gaslight, and that it would require a prodigious and wasteful expenditure of tallow-candles to illuminate the Tunnel sufficiently to discern even a ghost. On this account, however, it would be all the more suitable place of confinement for a metaphysician, to keep him from bewildering mankind with his shadowy speculations; and, being shut off from external converse, the dark corridor would help him to make rich discoveries in those cavernous regions and mysterious by-paths of the intellect, which he had so long accustomed himself to explore. But how would every successive age rejoice in so secure a habitation for its reformers, and especially for each best and wisest man that happened to be then alive! He seeks to burn up our whole system of society, under pretence of purifying it from its abuses! Away with him into the Tunnel, and let him begin by setting the Thames on fire, if he is able!

Meanwhile, I had forgotten that Sir Walter Raleigh's time didn't know anything about gaslight, and that it would take a massive and wasteful use of tallow candles to light the Tunnel enough to see even a ghost. On this account, however, it would be a better place to confine a metaphysician, keeping him from confusing people with his vague ideas; and being cut off from outside conversation, the dark corridor would help him make valuable discoveries in those deep, mysterious areas of the mind that he had spent so long exploring. But how would each succeeding age celebrate such a secure place for its reformers, especially for every best and brightest person alive at the time! He wants to destroy our entire social system under the guise of cleaning it up! Get him into the Tunnel, and let him start by setting the Thames on fire, if he can!

If not precisely these, yet akin to these were some of the fantasies that haunted me as I passed under the river: for the place is suggestive of such idle and irresponsible stuff by its own abortive character, its lack of whereabout on upper earth, or any solid foundation of realities. Could I have looked forward a few years, I might have regretted that American enterprise had not provided a similar tunnel, under the Hudson or the Potomac, for the convenience of our National Government in times hardly yet gone by. It would be delightful to clap up all the enemies of our peace and Union in the dark together, and there let them abide, listening to the monotonous roll of the river above their heads, or perhaps in a state of miraculously suspended animation, until,—be it after months, years, or centuries,—when the turmoil shall be all over, the Wrong washed away in blood (since that must needs be the cleansing fluid), and the Right firmly rooted in the soil which that blood will have enriched, they might crawl forth again and catch a single glimpse at their redeemed country, and feel it to be a better land than they deserve, and die!

If not exactly these, then similar ones were some of the thoughts that stayed with me as I passed under the river: the place naturally inspires such idle and reckless ideas because of its own abandoned nature, its lack of a connection to the upper world, or any solid foundation in reality. If I could have looked ahead a few years, I might have wished that American ingenuity had created a similar tunnel under the Hudson or the Potomac for the convenience of our National Government in times not so long past. It would be great to throw all our enemies of peace and unity together in the dark and let them stay there, listening to the steady flow of the river above them, or perhaps in a state of some kind of suspended animation, until—whether it takes months, years, or centuries—when the chaos is finally resolved, the wrong washed away in blood (which seems to be the necessary cleansing fluid), and the right firmly established in the soil enriched by that blood, they might crawl out again and catch a glimpse of their redeemed country, feel that it’s a better land than they deserve, and die!

I was not sorry when the daylight reached me after a much briefer abode in the nether regions than, I fear, would await the troublesome personages just hinted at. Emerging on the Surrey side of the Thames, I found myself in Rotherhithe, a neighborhood not unfamiliar to the readers of old books of maritime adventure. There being a ferry hard by the mouth of the Tunnel, I recrossed the river in the primitive fashion of an open boat, which the conflict of wind and tide, together with the swash and swell of the passing steamers, tossed high and low rather tumultuously. This inquietude of our frail skiff (which, indeed, bobbed up and down like a cork) so much alarmed an old lady, the only other passenger, that the boatmen essayed to comfort her. "Never fear, mother!" grumbled one of them, "we'll make the river as smooth as we can for you. We'll get a plane, and plane down the waves!" The joke may not read very brilliantly; but I make bold to record it as the only specimen that reached my ears of the old, rough water-wit for which the Thames used to be so celebrated. Passing directly along the line of the sunken Tunnel, we landed in Wapping, which I should have presupposed to be the most tarry and pitchy spot on earth, swarming with old salts, and full of warm, bustling, coarse, homely, and cheerful life. Nevertheless, it turned out to be a cold and torpid neighborhood, mean, shabby, and unpicturesque, both as to its buildings and inhabitants: the latter comprising (so far as was visible to me) not a single unmistakable sailor, though plenty of land-sharks, who get a half-dishonest livelihood by business connected with the sea. Ale and spirit vaults (as petty drinking-establishments are styled in England, pretending to contain vast cellars full of liquor within the compass of ten feet square above ground) were particularly abundant, together with apples, oranges, and oysters, the stalls of fishmongers and butchers, and slop-shops, where blue jackets and duck trousers swung and capered before the doors. Everything was on the poorest scale, and the place bore an aspect of unredeemable decay. From this remote point of London, I strolled leisurely towards the heart of the city; while the streets, at first but thinly occupied by man or vehicle, got more and more thronged with foot-passengers, carts, drays, cabs, and the all-pervading and all-accommodating omnibus. But I lack courage, and feel that I should lack perseverance, as the gentlest reader would lack patience, to undertake a descriptive stroll through London streets; more especially as there would be a volume ready for the printer before we could reach a midway resting-place at Charing Cross. It will be the easier course to step aboard another passing steamer, and continue our trip up the Thames.

I was relieved when daylight returned after a much shorter stay in the underworld than I fear the difficult people I mentioned would face. When I emerged on the Surrey side of the Thames, I found myself in Rotherhithe, a place familiar to fans of classic maritime adventure stories. Since there was a ferry near the mouth of the Tunnel, I crossed the river in an open boat, which was tossed up and down quite roughly by the wind, tide, and the waves created by passing steamers. This instability of our frail little boat (which truly bobbed like a cork) frightened an elderly lady, the only other passenger, so much that the boatmen tried to reassure her. "Don’t worry, ma'am!" one of them grumbled. "We'll make the river as smooth as we can for you. We'll get a plane and flatten the waves!" The joke might not seem very clever, but I dare to share it as the only example I heard of the old, rough humor associated with the Thames. Traveling directly along the route of the submerged Tunnel, we landed in Wapping, which I would have thought to be the most tarry and pitchy place on earth, filled with old sailors and buzzing with loud, robust, and cheerful life. However, it turned out to be a cold and lifeless neighborhood, shabby and unappealing in both its buildings and people: I didn't see a single unmistakable sailor, just a lot of opportunists making a somewhat shady living from sea-related businesses. Pubs (as small drinking establishments are called in England, pretending to have vast cellars of liquor within a ten-foot square above ground) were especially common, alongside stalls selling apples, oranges, oysters, fish, and butcher shops, where sailors in blue jackets and white trousers hung around. Everything was on a small scale, and the area had an appearance of irreversible decline. From this distant part of London, I casually strolled towards the city center; at first, the streets were only lightly populated with people or vehicles, but soon they became increasingly crowded with pedestrians, carts, drays, cabs, and the ever-present and convenient omnibuses. But I lack bravery and feel that I would also lack determination, as even the most patient reader would lose interest if I tried to describe a walk through London streets; especially since we would have a book ready for publication before we even reached halfway at Charing Cross. It will be easier to board another passing steamer and continue our journey up the Thames.

The next notable group of objects is an assemblage of ancient walls, battlements, and turrets, out of the midst of which rises prominently one great square tower, of a grayish line, bordered with white stone, and having a small turret at each corner of the roof. This central structure is the White Tower, and the whole circuit of ramparts and enclosed edifices constitutes what is known in English history, and still more widely and impressively in English poetry, as the Tower. A crowd of rivercraft are generally moored in front of it; but, if we look sharply at the right moment under the base of the rampart, we may catch a glimpse of an arched water-entrance, half submerged, past which the Thames glides as indifferently as if it were the mouth of a city-kennel. Nevertheless, it is the Traitor's Gate, a dreary kind of triumphal passageway (now supposed to be shut up and barred forever), through which a multitude of noble and illustrious personages have entered the Tower and found it a brief resting-place on their way to heaven. Passing it many times, I never observed that anybody glanced at this shadowy and ominous trap-door, save myself. It is well that America exists, if it were only that her vagrant children may be impressed and affected by the historical monuments of England in a degree of which the native inhabitants are evidently incapable. These matters are too familiar, too real, and too hopelessly built in amongst and mixed up with the common objects and affairs of life, to be easily susceptible of imaginative coloring in their minds; and even their poets and romancers feel it a toil, and almost a delusion, to extract poetic material out of what seems embodied poetry itself to an American. An Englishman cares nothing about the Tower, which to us is a haunted castle in dreamland. That honest and excellent gentleman, the late Mr. G. P. R. James (whose mechanical ability, one might have supposed, would nourish itself by devouring every old stone of such a structure), once assured me that he had never in his life set eyes upon the Tower, though for years an historic novelist in London.

The next notable group of objects is a collection of ancient walls, battlements, and turrets, at the center of which stands a prominent gray square tower, bordered with white stone, and featuring a small turret at each roof corner. This central structure is the White Tower, and the entire area of ramparts and surrounding buildings is known in English history—and even more impressively in English poetry—as the Tower. A crowd of boats is usually moored in front of it; however, if we look carefully at the right moment under the rampart's base, we might catch a glimpse of a partially submerged arched water entrance, past which the Thames flows as indifferently as if it were the mouth of a city drain. Yet, it is the Traitor's Gate, a dreary kind of triumphal entrance (now believed to be permanently closed), through which many noble and illustrious figures have entered the Tower, finding it a brief stop on their way to heaven. After passing it many times, I never noticed anyone else looking at this shadowy and ominous trap door, except for me. It's good that America exists, if only so that her wandering children can be impressed and moved by the historical monuments of England, in a way that the local people seem incapable of. These things are too familiar, too real, and too hopelessly intertwined with the everyday objects and matters of life, making it hard for them to see them with imaginative flair. Even their poets and storytellers find it a struggle, and almost a delusion, to draw poetic inspiration from what appears to be living poetry to an American. An Englishman doesn't care about the Tower, which for us is a haunted castle in a dream. That honest and wonderful gentleman, the late Mr. G. P. R. James (whose knack for storytelling you'd expect to be fueled by every old stone of such a place), once told me that he had never seen the Tower in his life, despite being a historical novelist in London for years.

Not to spend a whole summer's day upon the voyage, we will suppose ourselves to have reached London Bridge, and thence to have taken another steamer for a farther passage up the river. But here the memorable objects succeed each other so rapidly that I can spare but a single sentence even for the great Dome, through I deem it more picturesque, in that dusky atmosphere, than St. Peter's in its clear blue sky. I must mention, however (since everything connected with royalty is especially interesting to my dear countrymen), that I once saw a large and beautiful barge, splendidly gilded and ornamented, and overspread with a rich covering, lying at the pier nearest to St. Paul's Cathedral; it had the royal banner of Great Britain displayed, besides being decorated with a number of other flags; and many footmen (who are universally the grandest and gaudiest objects to be seen in England at this day, and these were regal ones, in a bright scarlet livery bedizened with gold-lace, and white silk stockings) were in attendance. I know not what festive or ceremonial occasion may have drawn out this pageant; after all, it might have been merely a city-spectacle, appertaining to the Lord Mayor; but the sight had its value in bringing vividly before me the grand old times when the sovereign and nobles were accustomed to use the Thames as the high street of the metropolis, and join in pompous processions upon it; whereas, the desuetude of such customs, nowadays, has caused the whole show of river-life to consist in a multitude of smoke-begrimed steamers. An analogous change has taken place in the streets, where cabs and the omnibus have crowded out a rich variety of vehicles; and thus life gets more monotonous in hue from age to age, and appears to seize every opportunity to strip off a bit of its gold-lace among the wealthier classes, and to make itself decent in the lower ones.

To avoid spending an entire summer day on this journey, let’s say we've reached London Bridge and then taken another steamer for further travel up the river. At this point, the notable sights come at me so quickly that I can only spare a single sentence for the great Dome, though I find it more picturesque in that dim atmosphere than St. Peter's in its clear blue sky. I must mention, however (since anything linked to royalty is particularly fascinating to my dear countrymen), that I once saw a large and beautiful barge, lavishly gilded and decorated, draped with a rich covering, docked at the pier closest to St. Paul's Cathedral; it displayed the royal banner of Great Britain and was adorned with several other flags. Many footmen (who are universally the most extravagant and colorful figures you’ll find in England today, and these were regal ones, in bright scarlet livery embellished with gold lace, and white silk stockings) were present. I don’t know what festive or ceremonial event might have brought out this spectacle; it could have simply been a city show related to the Lord Mayor. Still, the sight vividly reminded me of the grand old times when the sovereign and nobles would use the Thames as the main thoroughfare of the city, joining in elaborate processions on it. In contrast, the decline of such customs nowadays has made river life a mere display of smoke-stained steamers. A similar shift has happened in the streets, where cabs and buses have pushed out a rich variety of vehicles; as a result, life becomes increasingly dull over time, stripping away bits of its glamour among the wealthier classes while trying to appear respectable in the lower ones.

Yonder is Whitefriars, the old rowdy Alsatia, now wearing as decorous a face as any other portion of London; and, adjoining it, the avenues and brick squares of the Temple, with that historic garden, close upon the river-side, and still rich in shrubbery and flowers, where the partisans of York and Lancaster plucked the fatal roses, and scattered their pale and bloody petals over so many English battle-fields. Hard by, we see tine long white front or rear of Somerset House, and, farther on, rise the two new Houses of Parliament, with a huge unfinished tower already hiding its imperfect summit in the smoky canopy,—the whole vast and cumbrous edifice a specimen of the best that modern architecture can effect, elaborately imitating the masterpieces of those simple ages when men "builded better than they knew." Close by it, we have a glimpse of the roof and upper towers of the holy Abbey; while that gray, ancestral pile on the opposite side of the river is Lambeth Palace, a venerable group of halls and turrets, chiefly built of brick, but with at least one large tower of stone. In our course, we have passed beneath half a dozen bridges, and, emerging out of the black heart of London, shall soon reach a cleanly suburb, where old Father Thames, if I remember, begins to put on an aspect of unpolluted innocence. And now we look back upon the mass of innumerable roofs, out of which rise steeples, towers, columns, and the great crowning Dome,—look back, in short, upon that mystery of the world's proudest city, amid which a man so longs and loves to be; not, perhaps, because it contains much that is positively admirable and enjoyable, but because, at all events, the world has nothing better. The cream of external life is there; and whatever merely intellectual or material good we fail to find perfect in London, we may as well content ourselves to seek that unattainable thing no farther on this earth.

Over there is Whitefriars, the old rough-and-tumble Alsatia, now sporting a respectable look like any other part of London; next to it are the streets and brick squares of the Temple, with that historic garden by the river, still lush with plants and flowers, where the supporters of York and Lancaster picked the fateful roses and scattered their pale and bloody petals over so many English battlefields. Nearby, we see the long white front or back of Somerset House, and farther on, the two new Houses of Parliament rise, with a massive unfinished tower already hiding its imperfect top in the smoky haze—the whole vast and clunky building showcasing the best of modern architecture, intricately imitating the masterpieces of those simpler times when people "built better than they knew." Close by, we catch a glimpse of the roof and upper towers of the holy Abbey; meanwhile, that gray, historic structure on the other side of the river is Lambeth Palace, an ancient collection of halls and towers, mostly made of brick, but with at least one large stone tower. Along our way, we’ve gone under half a dozen bridges and as we come out of the dark heart of London, we’ll soon reach a tidy suburb, where old Father Thames, if I recall correctly, starts to look a bit more innocent. Now we look back at the multitude of rooftops, from which steeples, towers, columns, and the grand Dome rise—looking back, in short, at the enigma of the world’s proudest city, where one longs to be; not necessarily because it has much that is truly admirable and enjoyable, but simply because, at the very least, the world has nothing better. The essence of external life is there; and whatever intellectual or material good we find lacking in London, we might well accept that seeking that elusive quality would get us nowhere else on this earth.

The steamer terminates its trip at Chelsea, an old town endowed with a prodigious number of pothouses, and some famous gardens, called the Cremorne, for public amusement. The most noticeable thing, however, is Chelsea Hospital, which, like that of Greenwich, was founded, I believe, by Charles II. (whose bronze statue, in the guise of an old Roman, stands in the centre of the quadrangle,) and appropriated as a home for aged and infirm soldiers of the British army. The edifices are of three stories with windows in the high roofs, and are built of dark, sombre brick, with stone edgings and facings. The effect is by no means that of grandeur (which is somewhat disagreeably an attribute of Greenwich Hospital), but a quiet and venerable neatness. At each extremity of the street-front there is a spacious and hospitably open gateway, lounging about which I saw some gray veterans in long scarlet coats of an antique fashion, and the cocked hats of a century ago, or occasionally a modern foraging-cap. Almost all of them moved with a rheumatic gait, two or three stumped on wooden legs, and here and there an arm was missing. Inquiring of one of these fragmentary heroes whether a stranger could be admitted to see the establishment, he replied most cordially, "O yes, sir,—anywhere! Walk in and go where you please,—up stairs, or anywhere!" So I entered, and, passing along the inner side of the quadrangle, came to the door of the chapel, which forms a part of the contiguity of edifices next the street. Here another pensioner, an old warrior of exceedingly peaceable and Christian demeanor, touched his three-cornered hat and asked if I wished to see the interior; to which I assenting, he unlocked the door, and we went in.

The steamer ends its journey at Chelsea, an old town filled with a lot of pubs and some famous gardens called Cremorne, meant for public enjoyment. However, the most notable thing is Chelsea Hospital, which, like Greenwich Hospital, was founded by Charles II. (whose bronze statue, dressed like an old Roman, stands in the center of the courtyard) and serves as a home for elderly and sick soldiers of the British army. The buildings are three stories high with windows in the steep roofs, made of dark, somber brick with stone trims and facings. The overall look isn't grand (which is somewhat unappealing about Greenwich Hospital), but instead has a calm and respectable tidiness. At each end of the street, there are large, welcoming gateways where I saw some gray veterans in long, old-fashioned scarlet coats and the cocked hats from a century ago, along with a few wearing modern caps. Most of them walked with a stiff gait, two or three had wooden legs, and here and there an arm was missing. When I asked one of these seasoned heroes if a visitor could come in to see the place, he replied warmly, "Oh yes, sir—anywhere! Walk in and go wherever you like—upstairs or anywhere!" So I went in and, walking along the inside of the courtyard, reached the door of the chapel, which is part of the group of buildings next to the street. There, another pensioner, a very peaceful and kind old soldier, tipped his three-cornered hat and asked if I wanted to see the inside; when I said yes, he unlocked the door, and we stepped inside.

The chapel consists of a great hall with a vaulted roof, and over the altar is a large painting in fresco, the subject of which I did not trouble myself to make out. More appropriate adornments of the place, dedicated as well to martial reminiscences as religious worship, are the long ranges of dusty and tattered banners that hang from their staves all round the ceiling of the chapel. They are trophies of battles fought and won in every quarter of the world, comprising the captured flags of all the nations with whom the British lion has waged war since James II.'s time,—French, Dutch, East Indian, Prussian, Russian, Chinese, and American,—collected together in this consecrated spot, not to symbolize that there shall be no more discord upon earth, but drooping over the aisle in sullen, though peaceable humiliation. Yes, I said "American" among the rest; for the good old pensioner mistook me for an Englishman, and failed not to point out (and, methought, with an especial emphasis of triumph) some flags that had been taken at Bladensburg and Washington. I fancied, indeed, that they hung a little higher and drooped a little lower than any of their companions in disgrace. It is a comfort, however, that their proud devices are already indistinguishable, or nearly so, owing to dust and tatters and the kind offices of the moths, and that they will soon rot from the banner-staves and be swept out in unrecognized fragments from the chapel-door.

The chapel features a large hall with a vaulted ceiling, and above the altar is a big fresco painting, the subject of which I didn’t bother trying to figure out. More fitting decorations for this place, which honors both military memories and religious worship, are the long rows of dusty and tattered banners that hang from the beams all around the chapel’s ceiling. These are trophies from battles fought and won across the globe, including the captured flags of all the nations the British lion has gone to war with since the time of James II—French, Dutch, East Indian, Prussian, Russian, Chinese, and American—gathered in this sacred place, not to signify that there shall be no more conflict on earth, but hanging in gloomy, yet peaceful, humiliation over the aisle. Yes, I mentioned "American" among the others; the old pensioner mistook me for an Englishman and pointed out (with what seemed like a particular emphasis of triumph) some flags taken at Bladensburg and Washington. I did think they hung a bit higher and sagged a bit lower than their companions in disgrace. It’s somewhat comforting, though, that their proud symbols are already nearly indistinguishable due to dust and decay and the kind efforts of moths, and that soon they will rot off the banner-poles and be swept out in unrecognized pieces from the chapel door.

It is a good method of teaching a man how imperfectly cosmopolitan he is, to show him his country's flag occupying a position of dishonor in a foreign land. But, in truth, the whole system of a people crowing over its military triumphs had far better he dispensed with, both on account of the ill-blood that it helps to keep fermenting among the nations, and because it operates as an accumulative inducement to future generations to aim at a kind of glory, the gain of which has generally proved more ruinous than its loss. I heartily wish that every trophy of victory might crumble away, and that every reminiscence or tradition of a hero, from the beginning of the world to this day, could pass out of all men's memories at once and forever. I might feel very differently, to be sure, if we Northerners had anything especially valuable to lose by the fading of those illuminated names.

It’s a good way to teach someone how limited their global perspective is by showing them their country's flag in a position of disgrace in a foreign country. But honestly, the whole idea of a nation boasting about its military victories should be abandoned, both because it fuels ongoing animosity between countries and because it encourages future generations to pursue a kind of glory that usually ends up being more destructive than beneficial. I sincerely wish every trophy of victory would crumble and that every memory or story of heroes, from the beginning of time to now, would disappear from everyone’s minds forever. I might feel differently, of course, if we Northerners had anything particularly valuable to lose with the fading of those celebrated names.

I gave the pensioner (but I am afraid there may have been a little affectation in it) a magnificent guerdon of all the silver I had in my pocket, to requite him for having unintentionally stirred up my patriotic susceptibilities. He was a meek-looking, kindly old man, with a humble freedom and affability of manner that made it pleasant to converse with him. Old soldiers, I know not why, seem to be more accostable than old sailors. One is apt to hear a growl beneath the smoothest courtesy of the latter. The mild veteran, with his peaceful voice, and gentle reverend aspect, told me that he had fought at a cannon all through the Battle of Waterloo, and escaped unhurt; he had now been in the hospital four or five years, and was married, but necessarily underwent a separation from his wife, who lived outside of the gates. To my inquiry whether his fellow-pensioners were comfortable and happy, he answered, with great alacrity, "O yes, sir!" qualifying his evidence, after a moment's consideration, by saying in an undertone, "There are some people, your Honor knows, who could not be comfortable anywhere." I did know it, and fear that the system of Chelsea Hospital allows too little of that wholesome care and regulation of their own occupations and interests which might assuage the sting of life to those naturally uncomfortable individuals by giving them something external to think about. But my old friend here was happy in the hospital, and by this time, very likely, is happy in heaven, in spite of the bloodshed that he may have caused by touching off a cannon at Waterloo.

I gave the pensioner (though I think I might have overdone it a bit) a huge reward of all the silver I had in my pocket, to thank him for unintentionally stirring my patriotic feelings. He was a gentle-looking, kind old man, with a warm friendliness and easy manner that made it enjoyable to talk with him. Old soldiers, for some reason, seem easier to approach than old sailors. You might sense a growl hiding beneath the politest words from sailors. The mild veteran, with his calm voice and gentle, respectful appearance, told me that he had manned a cannon throughout the Battle of Waterloo and came out unharmed; he had been in the hospital for four or five years now, and he was married, though he had to be separated from his wife, who lived outside the gates. When I asked him if his fellow pensioners were comfortable and happy, he replied eagerly, "Oh yes, sir!" then, after a moment’s thought, he added quietly, "There are some people, you know, who couldn’t be comfortable anywhere." I did know that, and I worry that the Chelsea Hospital system doesn’t allow enough of that essential care and control over their own activities and interests which could help ease the lives of those who naturally struggle by giving them something external to focus on. But my old friend here was happy in the hospital, and by now, he’s probably very happy in heaven, despite the bloodshed he may have caused by firing a cannon at Waterloo.

Crossing Battersea Bridge, in the neighborhood of Chelsea, I remember seeing a distant gleam of the Crystal Palace, glimmering afar in the afternoon sunshine like an imaginary structure,—an air-castle by chance descended upon earth, and resting there one instant before it vanished, as we sometimes see a soap-bubble touch unharmed on the carpet,—a thing of only momentary visibility and no substance, destined to be overburdened and crushed down by the first cloud-shadow that might fall upon that spot. Even as I looked, it disappeared. Shall I attempt a picture of this exhalation of modern ingenuity, or what else shall I try to paint? Everything in London and its vicinity has been depicted innumerable times, but never once translated into intelligible images; it is an "old, old story," never yet told, nor to be told. While writing these reminiscences, I am continually impressed with the futility of the effort to give any creative truth to ink sketch, so that it might produce such pictures in the reader's mind as would cause the original scenes to appear familiar when afterwards beheld. Nor have other writers often been more successful in representing definite objects prophetically to my own mind. In truth, I believe that the chief delight and advantage of this kind of literature is not for any real information that it supplies to untravelled people, but for reviving the recollections and reawakening the emotions of persons already acquainted with the scenes described. Thus I found an exquisite pleasure, the other day, in reading Mr. Tuckerman's "Month in England," fine example of the way in which a refined and cultivated American looks at the Old Country, the things that he naturally seeks there, and the modes of feeling and reflection which they excite. Correct outlines avail little or nothing, though truth of coloring may be somewhat more efficacious. Impressions, however, states of mind produced by interesting and remarkable objects, these, if truthfully and vividly recorded, may work a genuine effect, and, though lint the result, of what we see, go further towards representing the actual scene than any direct effort to paint it. Give the emotions that cluster about it, and, without being able to analyze the spell by which it is summoned up, you get something like a simulacre of the object in the midst of them. From some of the above reflections I draw the comfortable inference, that, the longer and better known a thing may be, so much the more eligible is it as the subject of a descriptive sketch.

Crossing Battersea Bridge in the Chelsea area, I remember catching a glimpse of the Crystal Palace shining in the distance, sparkling in the afternoon sun like a dream structure—an imaginary castle that momentarily landed on Earth before disappearing, similar to how we sometimes see a soap bubble briefly touch the carpet without bursting—a fleeting sight with no real substance, destined to be overwhelmed and crushed by the first shadow that came along. Just as I was looking at it, it vanished. Should I try to describe this wondrous feat of modern engineering, or what else should I attempt to depict? Everything in London and its surroundings has been illustrated countless times, but never really translated into clear images; it’s an "old, old story," one that has never been told, nor can it be. While I write these memories, I am constantly struck by the futility of the effort to convey any true creative vision on paper, so that it might conjure images in the reader's mind that would make the original scenes feel familiar when seen later. Other writers have often been no more successful in evoking specific images in my mind. In reality, I believe that the main enjoyment and benefit of this kind of literature isn't the real information it offers to people who haven’t traveled, but rather it revives memories and rekindles emotions in those already familiar with the scenes described. Recently, I found great pleasure in reading Mr. Tuckerman's "Month in England," a fine example of how a refined and cultured American views the Old Country, the things he naturally seeks there, and the feelings and thoughts they inspire. Accurate outlines matter little, although truthful descriptions of colors might be somewhat more effective. Impressions, however, states of mind created by interesting and remarkable objects—if captured truthfully and vividly—can have a genuine impact, and while they reflect what we see, they may do more to represent the actual scene than any direct attempt to illustrate it. Capture the emotions surrounding it, and even without understanding the magic that brings these feelings to life, you create something resembling the object among them. From some of these thoughts, I draw the comforting conclusion that, the longer and better known something is, the more suitable it becomes as a subject for descriptive writing.

On a Sunday afternoon, I passed through a side-entrance in the time-blackened wall of a place of worship, and found myself among a congregation assembled in one of the transepts and the immediately contiguous portion of the nave. It was a vast old edifice, spacious enough, within the extent covered by its pillared roof and overspread by its stone pavement, to accommodate the whole of church-going London, and with a far wider and loftier concave than any human power of lungs could fill with audible prayer. Oaken benches were arranged in the transept, on one of which I seated myself, and joined, as well as I knew how, in the sacred business that was going forward. But when it came to the sermon, the voice of the preacher was puny, and so were his thoughts, and both seemed impertinent at such a time and place, where he and all of us were bodily included within a sublime act of religion, which could be seen above and around us and felt beneath our feet. The structure itself was the worship of the devout men of long ago, miraculously preserved in stone without losing an atom of its fragrance and fervor; it was a kind of anthem-strain that they had sung and poured out of the organ in centuries gone by; and being so grand and sweet, the Divine benevolence had willed it to be prolonged for the behoof of auditors unborn. I therefore came to the conclusion, that, in my individual case, it would be better and more reverent to let my eyes wander about the edifice than to fasten them and my thoughts on the evidently uninspired mortal who was venturing—and felt it no venture at all—to speak here above his breath.

On a Sunday afternoon, I walked through a side entrance in the darkened stone wall of a church and found myself among a group gathered in one of the side areas and the nearby part of the main hall. It was a huge, old building, spacious enough under its pillared roof and stone floor to hold all of church-going London, with a ceiling so high that no one could fill it with their voices in prayers. Wooden benches were set up in the side area, and I sat on one, trying to join in the sacred activities taking place. But when the sermon started, the preacher's voice was weak, and so were his ideas; both felt out of place in such a moment and setting, where he and all of us were physically part of a grand act of worship that could be seen all around us and felt beneath our feet. The structure itself was the work of devoted people from long ago, miraculously preserved in stone without losing any of its beauty and spirit; it was like an anthem they had sung and played on the organ centuries earlier; and being so magnificent and moving, Divine kindness had ensured it would last for future listeners. I decided that, for me personally, it would be better and more respectful to let my eyes explore the building rather than focus on the obviously uninspired person who thought it was easy to speak here above a whisper.

The interior of Westminster Abbey (for the reader recognized it, no doubt, the moment we entered) is built of rich brown stone; and the whole of it—the lofty roof, the tall, clustered pillars, and the pointed arches—appears to be in consummate repair. At all points where decay has laid its finger, the structure is clamped with iron or otherwise carefully protected; and being thus watched over,—whether as a place of ancient sanctity, a noble specimen of Gothic art, or an object of national interest and pride,—it may reasonably be expected to survive for as many ages as have passed over it already. It was sweet to feel its venerable quietude, its long-enduring peace, and yet to observe how kindly and even cheerfully it received the sunshine of to-day, which fell from the great windows into the fretted aisles and arches that laid aside somewhat of their aged gloom to welcome it. Sunshine always seems friendly to old abbeys, churches, and castles, kissing them, as it were, with a more affectionate, though still reverential familiarity, than it accords to edifices of later date. A square of golden light lay on the sombre pavement of the nave, afar off, falling through the grand western entrance, the folding leaves of which were wide open, and afforded glimpses of people passing to and fro in the outer world, while we sat dimly enveloped in the solemnity of antique devotion. In the south transept, separated from us by the full breadth of the minster, there were painted glass windows of which the uppermost appeared to be a great orb of many-colored radiance, being, indeed, a cluster of saints and angels whose glorified bodies formed the rays of an aureole emanating from a cross in the midst. These windows are modern, but combine softness with wonderful brilliancy of effect. Through the pillars and arches, I saw that the walls in that distant region of the edifice were almost wholly incrusted with marble, now grown yellow with time, no blank, unlettered slabs, but memorials of such men as their respective generations deemed wisest and bravest. Some of them were commemorated merely by inscriptions on mural tablets, others by sculptured bas-reliefs, others (once famous, but now forgotten generals or admirals, these) by ponderous tombs that aspired towards the roof of the aisle, or partly curtained the immense arch of a window. These mountains of marble were peopled with the sisterhood of Allegory, winged trumpeters, and classic figures in full-bottomed wigs; but it was strange to observe how the old Abbey melted all such absurdities into the breadth of its own grandeur, even magnifying itself by what would elsewhere have been ridiculous. Methinks it is the test of Gothic sublimity to overpower the ridiculous without deigning to hide it; and these grotesque monuments of the last century answer a similar purpose with the grinning faces which, the old architects scattered among their most solemn conceptions.

The inside of Westminster Abbey (which the reader surely recognized as soon as we walked in) is built from rich brown stone, and everything—the high ceiling, the tall, grouped pillars, and the pointed arches—looks perfectly maintained. Everywhere that decay has touched, the structure is reinforced with iron or carefully protected; and being watched over in this way—whether as a place of long-standing holiness, a remarkable example of Gothic art, or a site of national pride and interest—it can reasonably be expected to last for as long as it has already endured. It was refreshing to feel its ancient tranquility and enduring peace while also noticing how warmly and even cheerfully it welcomed today’s sunshine, which streamed in through the grand windows and brightened the intricate aisles and arches, lifting some of their aged gloom to embrace it. Sunshine always seems friendly to old abbeys, churches, and castles, almost kissing them with a more affectionate yet respectful familiarity than it shows to buildings from later times. A patch of golden light lay on the dark pavement of the nave, far off, coming through the wide-open western entrance, which let us see people moving in and out of the outside world as we sat, quietly wrapped in the solemnity of ancient devotion. In the south transept, across the full width of the church from us, there were stained-glass windows, the highest of which appeared to be a large orb of colorful brightness—actually a cluster of saints and angels whose glorified bodies formed the rays of an aura emanating from a cross at the center. These windows are modern but blend softness with stunning brilliance. Through the pillars and arches, I noticed that the walls in that distant part of the building were almost completely covered in marble, now aged to a yellow hue, no blank slabs but memorials of the wisest and bravest individuals recognized by their respective generations. Some were honored with inscriptions on wall tablets, others with sculpted reliefs, and some (once-renowned but now forgotten generals or admirals) with imposing tombs that reached toward the ceiling of the aisle or partially obscured the vast arch of a window. These marble monuments were populated with figures of Allegory, winged trumpeters, and classic characters in full-bottomed wigs; but it was interesting to see how the old Abbey absorbed all such absurdities into its own grandeur, even enhancing its presence with what would seem ridiculous elsewhere. It seems to me that the essence of Gothic excellence is to overshadow the ridiculous without trying to hide it; and these bizarre monuments from the past century serve a similar role as the grinning faces old architects scattered among their most serious designs.

From these distant wanderings (it was my first visit to Westminster Abbey, and I would gladly have taken it all in at a glance) my eyes came back and began to investigate what was immediately about me in the transept. Close at my elbow was the pedestal of Canning's statue. Next beyond it was a massive tomb, on the spacious tablet of which reposed the full-length figures of a marble lord and lady, whom an inscription announced to be the Duke and Duchess of Newcastle,—the historic Duke of Charles I.'s time, and the fantastic Duchess, traditionally remembered by her poems and plays. She was of a family, as the record on her tomb proudly informed us, of which all the brothers had been valiant and all the sisters virtuous. A recent statue of Sir John Malcolm, the new marble as white as snow, held the next place; and near by was a mural monument and bust of Sir Peter Warren. The round visage of this old British admiral has a certain interest for a New-Englander, because it was by no merit of his own (though he took care to assume it as such), but by the valor and warlike enterprise of our colonial forefathers, especially the stout men of Massachusetts, that he won rank and renown, and a tomb in Westminster Abbey. Lord Mansfield, a huge mass of marble done into the guise of a judicial gown and wig, with a stern face in the midst of the latter, sat on the other side of the transept; and on the pedestal beside him was a figure of Justice, holding forth, instead of the customary grocer's scales, an actual pair of brass steelyards. It is an ancient and classic instrument, undoubtedly; but I had supposed that Portia (when Shylock's pound of flesh was to be weighed) was the only judge that ever really called for it in a court of justice. Pitt and Fox were in the same distinguished company; and John Kemble, in Roman costume, stood not far off, but strangely shorn of the dignity that is said to have enveloped him like a mantle in his lifetime. Perhaps the evanescent majesty of the stage is incompatible with the long endurance of marble and the solemn reality of the tomb; though, on the other hand, almost every illustrious personage here represented has been invested with more or less of stage-trickery by his sculptor. In truth, the artist (unless there be a divine efficacy in his touch, making evident a heretofore hidden dignity in the actual form) feels it—an imperious law to remove his subject as far from the aspect of ordinary life as may be possible without sacrificing every trace of resemblance. The absurd effect of the contrary course is very remarkable in the statue of Mr. Wilberforce, whose actual self, save for the lack of color, I seemed to behold, seated just across the aisle.

From these far-off explorations (it was my first visit to Westminster Abbey, and I would have happily taken it all in at once), my gaze returned and began to examine what was right in front of me in the transept. Right next to me was the base of Canning's statue. Just beyond that was a large tomb, on the wide slab of which lay the full-length figures of a marble lord and lady, identified by an inscription as the Duke and Duchess of Newcastle—the historical Duke from the time of Charles I and the eccentric Duchess, famously remembered for her poems and plays. She came from a family that, as the inscription on her tomb proudly declared, had all the brothers being brave and all the sisters virtuous. A recent statue of Sir John Malcolm, gleaming white like snow, occupied the next spot; nearby was a wall monument and bust of Sir Peter Warren. The round face of this old British admiral holds interest for someone from New England, because it was not through his own merit (though he made sure to take credit) but through the bravery and military efforts of our colonial ancestors, especially the hardy men of Massachusetts, that he gained rank and fame—and a tomb in Westminster Abbey. Lord Mansfield, a huge chunk of marble shaped into the form of a judicial gown and wig, with a stern face in the middle of the latter, sat on the other side of the transept; and next to him was a figure of Justice, holding not the usual grocer's scales, but an actual pair of brass steelyards. It’s certainly an ancient and classic tool, but I thought that Portia (when Shylock's pound of flesh was supposed to be weighed) was the only judge who ever truly called for it in a courtroom. Pitt and Fox were in the same notable company; and John Kemble, dressed in Roman attire, stood not far away, but oddly lacking the dignity that was said to have surrounded him like a cloak in his lifetime. Perhaps the fleeting majesty of the stage doesn’t coexist well with the lasting nature of marble and the serious reality of the tomb; on the other hand, nearly every illustrious figure represented here has been given some theatrical flair by the sculptor. In fact, the artist (unless there's some divine quality in their touch revealing a previously hidden dignity in the actual form) feels it—an urgent need to distance their subject from the appearance of ordinary life as much as possible without losing any resemblance. The ridiculous outcome of taking the opposite approach is particularly evident in the statue of Mr. Wilberforce, whose real self, except for the lack of color, I felt I could see, sitting just across the aisle.

This excellent man appears to have sunk into himself in a sitting posture, with a thin leg crossed over his knee, a book in one hand, and a finger of the other under his chin, I believe, or applied to the side of his nose, or to some equally familiar purpose; while his exceedingly homely and wrinkled face, held a little on one side, twinkles at you with the shrewdest complacency, as if he were looking right into your eyes, and twigged something there which you had half a mind to conceal from him. He keeps this look so pertinaciously that you feel it to be insufferably impertinent, and bethink yourself what common ground there may be between yourself and a stone image, enabling you to resent it. I have no doubt that the statue is as like Mr. Wilberforce as one pea to another, and you might fancy, that, at some ordinary moment, when he least expected it, and before he had time to smooth away his knowing complication of wrinkles, he had seen the Gorgon's head, and whitened into marble,—not only his personal self, but his coat and small-clothes, down to a button and the minutest crease of the cloth. The ludicrous result marks the impropriety of bestowing the age-long duration of marble upon small, characteristic individualities, such as might come within the province of waxen imagery. The sculptor should give permanence to the figure of a great man in his mood of broad and grand composure, which would obliterate all mean peculiarities; for, if the original were unaccustomed to such a mood, or if his features were incapable of assuming the guise, it seems questionable whether he could really have been entitled to a marble immortality. In point of fact, however, the English face and form are seldom statuesque, however illustrious the individual.

This impressive man seems to have sunk into himself while sitting, with one thin leg crossed over his knee, a book in one hand, and a finger from the other hand resting under his chin, I believe, or touching the side of his nose, or perhaps doing something equally familiar; while his very plain and wrinkled face, tilted a little to one side, twinkles at you with the sharpest satisfaction, as if he’s looking right into your eyes and has spotted something there that you were almost hoping to hide from him. He maintains this look so persistently that it feels incredibly rude, making you wonder what common ground there could be between you and a stone statue that allows you to feel offended. I have no doubt that the statue looks just like Mr. Wilberforce, as similar as two peas, and you might imagine that, at some random moment when he least expected it, and before he had time to smooth out his complex wrinkles, he saw the Gorgon's head and turned to marble—not just his personal self, but his coat and trousers down to a button and the tiniest crease in the fabric. The ridiculous outcome shows how inappropriate it is to give the timelessness of marble to small, distinctive traits that would be better suited for wax figures. The sculptor should capture the essence of a great man in a moment of broad and grand calm that would erase all minor quirks; for if the original was not used to such a mood, or if his features couldn't take on that expression, it's questionable whether he truly deserved a marble forever. However, in reality, the English face and body are rarely statue-like, no matter how distinguished the individual may be.

It ill becomes me, perhaps, to have lapsed into this mood of half-jocose criticism in describing my first visit to Westminster Abbey, a spot which I had dreamed about more reverentially, from my childhood upward, than any other in the world, and which I then beheld, and now look back upon, with profound gratitude to the men who built it, and a kindly interest, I may add, in the humblest personage that has contributed his little all to its impressiveness, by depositing his dust or his memory there. But it is a characteristic of this grand edifice that it permits you to smile as freely under the roof of its central nave as if you stood beneath the yet grander canopy of heaven. Break into laughter, if you feel inclined, provided the vergers do not hear it echoing among the arches. In an ordinary church you would keep your countenance for fear of disturbing the sanctities or proprieties of the place; but you need leave no honest and decorous portion of your human nature outside of these benign and truly hospitable walls. Their mild awfulness will take care of itself. Thus it does no harm to the general impression, when you come to be sensible that many of the monuments are ridiculous, and commemorate a mob of people who are mostly forgotten in their graves, and few of whom ever deserved any better boon from posterity. You acknowledge the force of Sir Godfrey Kneller's objection to being buried in Westminster Abbey, because "they do bury fools there!" Nevertheless, these grotesque carvings of marble, that break out in dingy-white blotches on the old freestone of the interior walls, have come there by as natural a process as might cause mosses and ivy to cluster about the external edifice; for they are the historical and biographical record of each successive age, written with its own hand, and all the truer for the inevitable mistakes, and none the less solemn for the occasional absurdity. Though you entered the Abbey expecting to see the tombs only of the illustrious, you are content at last to read many names, both in literature and history, that have now lost the reverence of mankind, if indeed they ever really possessed it.

It might not be right for me to have slipped into this somewhat playful criticism while describing my first visit to Westminster Abbey, a place I had dreamed about more respectfully, since I was a child, than any other in the world. I saw it then, and I still look back on it now, with deep gratitude for the people who built it, and a warm interest, I might add, in even the humblest individual who contributed their little bit to its significance by placing their remains or memory there. What’s special about this great building is that it lets you smile just as freely under its central nave as if you were standing beneath the even greater canopy of the sky. Feel free to laugh if you want, as long as the vergers don’t catch you echoing off the arches. In a regular church, you would hold back your expressions out of fear of disrupting the sacredness or decorum of the place; but here, you don’t need to leave any honest and decent part of your humanity outside these kind and genuinely welcoming walls. Their gentle seriousness will look after itself. So, it doesn’t spoil the overall impression when you realize that many of the monuments are kind of ridiculous, honoring a crowd of people who are mostly forgotten in their graves, and few of whom ever truly deserved any better recognition from future generations. You can see why Sir Godfrey Kneller didn’t want to be buried in Westminster Abbey because "they do bury fools there!" Still, these odd marble carvings, which appear as dingy-white splotches on the old freestone of the interior walls, arrived there by as natural a process as moss and ivy growing around the exterior of the building; they are the historical and biographical record of each successive era, documented in its own handwriting, all the more genuine because of the inevitable errors, and none the less serious for the occasional absurdity. Although you walked into the Abbey expecting to see only the tombs of the famous, you ultimately find yourself accepting many names from literature and history that have now lost the respect of people, if they ever had it at all.

Let these men rest in peace. Even if you miss a name or two that you hoped to find there, they may well be spared. It matters little a few more or less, or whether Westminster Abbey contains or lacks any one man's grave, so long as the Centuries, each with the crowd of personages that it deemed memorable, have chosen it as their place of honored sepulture, and laid themselves down under its pavement. The inscriptions and devices on the walls are rich with evidences of the fluctuating tastes, fashions, manners, opinions, prejudices, follies, wisdoms of the past, and thus they combine into a more truthful memorial of their dead times than any individual epitaph-maker ever meant to write.

Let these men rest in peace. Even if you don't see a name or two that you were hoping to find, they might still be remembered. It doesn’t really matter if there are a few more or less names, or whether Westminster Abbey has or lacks a particular person’s grave, as long as the centuries, each with the crowd of notable figures they considered worthy, have chosen it as their place of honored burial and laid themselves to rest beneath its floor. The inscriptions and symbols on the walls are full of evidence of the changing tastes, trends, manners, opinions, biases, follies, and wisdoms of the past, and together they create a more accurate memorial of their times than any individual gravestone designer ever intended to create.

When the services were over, many of the audience seemed inclined to linger in the nave or wander away among the mysterious aisles; for there is nothing in this world so fascinating as a Gothic minster, which always invites you deeper and deeper into its heart both by vast revelations and shadowy concealments. Through the open-work screen that divides the nave from the chancel and choir, we could discern the gleam of a marvellous window, but were debarred from entrance into that more sacred precinct of the Abbey by the vergers. These vigilant officials (doing their duty all the more strenuously because no fees could be exacted from Sunday visitors) flourished their staves, and drove us towards the grand entrance like a flock of sheep. Lingering through one of the aisles, I happened to look down, and found my foot upon a stone inscribed with this familiar exclamation, "O rare Ben Jonson!" and remembered the story of stout old Ben's burial in that spot, standing upright,—not, I presume, on account of any unseemly reluctance on his part to lie down in the dust, like other men, but because standing-room was all that could reasonably be demanded for a poet among the slumberous notabilities of his age. It made me weary to think of it!—such a prodigious length of time to keep one's feet!—apart from the honor of the thing, it would certainly have been better for Ben to stretch himself at ease in some country churchyard. To this day, however, I fancy that there is a contemptuous alloy mixed up with the admiration which the higher classes of English society profess for their literary men.

When the services ended, many people in the audience seemed eager to linger in the nave or wander through the mysterious aisles. There's nothing in this world as captivating as a Gothic cathedral, which always draws you deeper into its core with its vast revelations and shadowy secrets. Through the openwork screen that separates the nave from the chancel and choir, we could see the sparkle of a beautiful window, but we were prevented from entering that more sacred part of the Abbey by the vergers. These watchful officials (doing their job even more strictly because they couldn’t collect fees from Sunday visitors) waved their staffs and pushed us towards the grand entrance like a herd of sheep. While wandering through one of the aisles, I happened to look down and saw my foot on a stone marked with the familiar phrase, "O rare Ben Jonson!" I remembered the story of stout old Ben being buried there, standing upright—not, I guess, because he was unwilling to lie in the dust like other men, but because a poet deserved nothing less than standing room among the prominent figures of his time. It made me tired just thinking about it!—such an incredibly long time to remain on your feet!—besides the honor of it, it would have been far better for Ben to rest comfortably in some countryside graveyard. Still, I can’t shake the feeling that there’s a hint of disdain mixed in with the admiration that the upper classes of English society show for their writers.

Another day—in truth, many other days—I sought out Poets' Corner, and found a sign-board and pointed finger, directing the visitor to it, on the corner house of a little lane leading towards the rear of the Abbey. The entrance is at the southeastern end of the south transept, and it is used, on ordinary occasions, as the only free mode of access to the building. It is no spacious arch, but a small, lowly door, passing through which, and pushing aside an inner screen that partly keeps out an exceedingly chill wind, you find yourself in a dim nook of the Abbey, with the busts of poets gazing at you from the otherwise bare stone-work of the walls. Great poets, too; for Ben Jenson is right behind the door, and Spenser's tablet is next, and Butler's on the same side of the transept, and Milton's (whose bust you know at once by its resemblance to one of his portraits, though older, more wrinkled, and sadder than that) is close by, and a profile-medallion of Gray beneath it. A window high aloft sheds down a dusky daylight on these and many other sculptured marbles, now as yellow as old parchment, that cover the three walls of the nook up to an elevation of about twenty feet above the pavement. It seemed to me that I had always been familiar with the spot. Enjoying a humble intimacy—and how much of my life had else been a dreary solitude!—with many of its inhabitants, I could not feel myself a stranger there. It was delightful to be among them. There was a genial awe, mingled with a sense of kind and friendly presences about me; and I was glad, moreover, at finding so many of them there together, in fit companionship, mutually recognized and duly honored, all reconciled now, whatever distant generations, whatever personal hostility or other miserable impediment, had divided them far asunder while they lived. I have never felt a similar interest in any other tombstones, nor have I ever been deeply moved by the imaginary presence of other famous dead people. A poet's ghost is the only one that survives for his fellow-mortals, after his bones are in the dust,—and be not ghostly, but cherishing many hearts with his own warmth in the chillest atmosphere of life. What other fame is worth aspiring for? Or, let me speak it more boldly, what other long-enduring fame can exist? We neither remember nor care anything for the past, except as the poet has made it intelligibly noble and sublime to our comprehension. The shades of the mighty have no substance; they flit ineffectually about the darkened stage where they performed their momentary parts, save when the poet has thrown his own creative soul into them, and imparted a more vivid life than ever they were able to manifest to mankind while they dwelt in the body. And therefore—though he cunningly disguises himself in their armor, their robes of state, or kingly purple—it is not the statesman, the warrior, or the monarch that survives, but the despised poet, whom they may have fed with their crumbs, and to whom they owe all that they now are or have,—a name!

Another day—in fact, many other days—I searched for Poets' Corner and found a sign and pointed finger directing visitors to it on the corner house of a small lane leading to the back of the Abbey. The entrance is at the southeast end of the south transept, and it's the only free way to access the building on regular occasions. It’s not a grand arch, but a small, humble door. Passing through this door and pushing aside an inner screen that partially blocks an extremely cold wind, you find yourself in a dim corner of the Abbey, with busts of poets staring at you from the otherwise bare stone walls. Great poets too; for Ben Jonson is right behind the door, Spenser's tablet is next, and Butler's is on the same side of the transept. Milton's bust (which you recognize immediately by its resemblance to one of his portraits, although it looks older, more wrinkled, and sadder) is nearby, along with a profile medallion of Gray beneath it. A high window lets in a gloomy daylight that falls on these and many other sculpted marbles, now as yellow as old parchment, covering the three walls of the nook up to about twenty feet above the pavement. It felt like I had always known this place. Enjoying a humble intimacy—and how much of my life had otherwise been a dreary solitude!—with many of its residents, I couldn’t feel like a stranger there. It was wonderful to be among them. There was a warm awe, mixed with a sense of kind and friendly presences around me. I was also pleased to find so many of them together, in suitable company, mutually recognized and properly honored, all reconciled now, despite any distant generations or personal grudges that had kept them apart while they were alive. I've never felt the same connection to any other gravestones, nor have I ever been deeply affected by the imaginary presence of other famous dead people. A poet's ghost is the only one that endures for his fellow humans after his bones turn to dust—and it’s not ghostly, but fuels many hearts with his warmth in life’s coldest atmosphere. What other kind of fame is worth striving for? Or to put it more boldly, what other lasting fame can exist? We neither remember nor care about the past, except as the poet has made it intelligible, noble, and sublime for us. The shadows of the great have no substance; they waste away aimlessly on the darkened stage where they played their brief parts, unless the poet has infused them with his own creative soul and given them a more vibrant life than they could ever show while they were alive. And so—even though he cleverly disguises himself in their armor, their royal robes, or kingly purple—it's not the statesman, the warrior, or the monarch that survives, but the undervalued poet, whom they may have fed with their scraps, and to whom they owe everything they currently are or have—a name!

In the foregoing paragraph I seem to have been betrayed into a flight above or beyond the customary level that best agrees with me; but it represents fairly enough the emotions with which I passed from Poets' Corner into the chapels, which contain the sepulchres of kings and great people. They are magnificent even now, and must have been inconceivably so when the marble slabs and pillars wore their new polish, and the statues retained the brilliant colors with which they were originally painted, and the shrines their rich gilding, of which the sunlight still shows a glimmer or a streak, though the sunbeam itself looks tarnished with antique dust. Yet this recondite portion of the Abbey presents few memorials of personages whom we care to remember. The shrine of Edward the Confessor has a certain interest, because it was so long held in religious reverence, and because the very dust that settled upon it was formerly worth gold. The helmet and war-saddle of Henry V., worn at Agincourt, and now suspended above his tomb, are memorable objects, but more for Shakespeare's sake than the victor's own. Rank has been the general passport to admission here. Noble and regal dust is as cheap as dirt under the pavement. I am glad to recollect, indeed (and it is too characteristic of the right English spirit not to be mentioned), one or two gigantic statues of great mechanicians, who contributed largely to the material welfare of England, sitting familiarly in their marble chairs among forgotten kings and queens. Otherwise, the quaintness of the earlier monuments, and the antique beauty of some of them, are what chiefly gives them value. Nevertheless, Addison is buried among the men of rank; not on the plea of his literary fame, however, but because he was connected with nobility by marriage, and had been a Secretary of State. His gravestone is inscribed with a resounding verse from Tickell's lines to his memory, the only lines by which Tickell himself is now remembered, and which (as I discovered a little while ago) he mainly filched from an obscure versifier of somewhat earlier date.

In the previous paragraph, I seem to have gotten carried away beyond the usual level that suits me best; however, it reflects my feelings as I moved from Poets' Corner into the chapels that hold the tombs of kings and prominent figures. They are still impressive today and must have been unbelievably stunning when the marble slabs and pillars were freshly polished, the statues had their original vibrant colors, and the shrines had their rich gilding, of which sunlight still reveals a glimmer or a streak, even though the sunbeam itself looks dulled by ancient dust. Yet, this hidden part of the Abbey has few memorials of figures we actually care about remembering. The shrine of Edward the Confessor is of some interest, as it was long held in religious esteem, and even the dust that settled on it was once considered valuable. The helmet and war-saddle of Henry V., worn at Agincourt and now hanging above his tomb, are significant artifacts, but more for Shakespeare's sake than for the victor himself. Rank has generally been the ticket to admission here. Noble and royal remains are as common as dirt beneath the pavement. I’m happy to recall, indeed (and it’s too characteristic of the true English spirit not to mention), a couple of massive statues of great inventors, who significantly contributed to the material prosperity of England, casually seated in their marble chairs among forgotten kings and queens. Otherwise, the charm of the earlier monuments and the antique beauty of some of them are what mainly give them value. Nevertheless, Addison is buried among the nobility; not for his literary fame, but because he was linked to nobility through marriage and had served as Secretary of State. His gravestone is marked with a grand verse from Tickell's tribute to him, which is the only thing Tickell himself is remembered for, and which (as I recently discovered) he primarily took from an obscure poet who came before him.

Returning to Poets' Corner, I looked again at the walls, and wondered how the requisite hospitality can be shown to poets of our own and the succeeding ages. There is hardly a foot of space left, although room has lately been found for a bust of Southey and a full-length statue of Campbell. At best, only a little portion of the Abbey is dedicated to poets, literary men, musical composers, and others of the gentle artist breed, and even into that small nook of sanctity men of other pursuits have thought it decent to intrude themselves. Methinks the tuneful throng, being at home here, should recollect how they were treated in their lifetime, and turn the cold shoulder, looking askance at nobles and official personages, however worthy of honorable intercourse elsewhere. Yet it shows aptly and truly enough what portion of the world's regard and honor has heretofore been awarded to literary eminence in comparison with other modes of greatness,—this dimly lighted corner (nor even that quietly to themselves) in the vast minster, the walls of which are sheathed and hidden under marble that has been wasted upon the illustrious obscure. Nevertheless, it may not be worth while to quarrel with the world on this account; for, to confess the very truth, their own little nook contains more than one poet whose memory is kept alive by his monument, instead of imbuing the senseless stone with a spiritual immortality,—men of whom you do not ask, "Where is he?" but, "Why is he here?" I estimate that all the literary people who really make an essential part of one's inner life, including the period since English literature first existed, might have ample elbow-room to sit down and quaff their draughts of Castaly round Chaucer's broad, horizontal tombstone. These divinest poets consecrate the spot, and throw a reflected glory over the humblest of their companions. And as for the latter, it is to be hoped that they may have long outgrown the characteristic jealousies and morbid sensibilities of their craft, and have found out the little value (probably not amounting to sixpence in immortal currency) of the posthumous renown which they once aspired to win. It would be a poor compliment to a dead poet to fancy him leaning out of the sky and snuffing up the impure breath of earthly praise.

Returning to Poets' Corner, I looked at the walls again and wondered how we can show the necessary respect to poets from our time and those who will follow. There's hardly any space left, even though there's recently been a spot for a bust of Southey and a full-length statue of Campbell. At best, only a small part of the Abbey is dedicated to poets, writers, composers, and other gentle artists, and even that small area has been invaded by people from other professions. I think the musical crowd, being at home here, should remember how they were treated during their lives and turn their backs on nobles and officials, no matter how deserving of respect they might be elsewhere. Yet, this aptly shows how little recognition and honor has historically been given to literary greatness compared to other forms of achievement—this dimly lit corner (and even that quietly to themselves) in the vast cathedral, the walls of which are covered in marble wasted on the illustrious unknown. Still, it might not be worth it to argue with the world over this; honestly, their little area holds more than one poet whose memory is celebrated by their monument, rather than giving life to the lifeless stone—men who you don't ask, "Where is he?" but "Why is he here?" I reckon that all the literary figures who truly matter in one's inner life, including those from the beginning of English literature, could comfortably sit and enjoy their drinks around Chaucer's broad, flat tombstone. These greatest poets bless the spot and cast a shine over even the humblest of their companions. As for those lesser figures, it is to be hoped they have long outgrown the typical jealousies and sensitivities of their trade and have realized the little worth (likely not even sixpence in immortal currency) of the posthumous fame they once sought. It would be a sad compliment to a dead poet to imagine him peering down from the sky and inhaling the tainted air of earthly praise.

Yet we cannot easily rid ourselves of the notion that those who have bequeathed us the inheritance of an undying song would fain be conscious of its endless reverberations in the hearts of mankind, and would delight, among sublimer enjoyments, to see their names emblazoned in such a treasure-place of great memories as Westminster Abbey. There are some men, at all events,—true and tender poets, moreover, and fully deserving of the honor,—whose spirits, I feel certain, would linger a little while about Poets' Corner for the sake of witnessing their own apotheosis among their kindred. They have had a strong natural yearning, not so much for applause as sympathy, which the cold fortune of their lifetime did but scantily supply; so that this unsatisfied appetite may make itself felt upon sensibilities at once so delicate and retentive, even a step or two beyond the grave. Leigh Hunt, for example, would be pleased, even now, if he could learn that his bust had been reposited in the midst of the old poets whom he admired and loved; though there is hardly a man among the authors of to-day and yesterday whom the judgment of Englishmen would be less likely to place there. He deserves it, however, if not for his verse (the value of which I do not estimate, never having been able to read it), yet for his delightful prose, his unmeasured poetry, the inscrutable happiness of his touch, working soft miracles by a life-process like the growth of grass and flowers. As with all such gentle writers, his page sometimes betrayed a vestige of affectation, but, the next moment, a rich, natural luxuriance overgrew and buried it out of sight. I knew him a little, and (since, Heaven be praised, few English celebrities whom I chanced to meet have enfranchised my pen by their decease, and as I assume no liberties with living men) I will conclude this rambling article by sketching my first interview with Leigh Hunt.

Yet we can't easily shake the idea that those who gave us the gift of an everlasting song would want to be aware of its endless echoes in people's hearts, and would enjoy, among greater pleasures, seeing their names honored in a treasured place of great memories like Westminster Abbey. There are certainly some individuals—truly caring poets, no less, who are fully deserving of this honor—whose spirits, I believe, would linger a bit around Poets' Corner to witness their own elevation among their peers. They have had a deep natural longing, not so much for applause but for sympathy, which the harsh realities of their lifetime only provided in meager amounts; this unfulfilled desire may resonate even after death for those with such sensitive and receptive hearts. Leigh Hunt, for instance, would be pleased, even now, to learn that his bust is placed among the old poets he admired and loved; though it's unlikely that anyone among today's or yesterday's authors would be deemed as deserving by the judgment of the English. Still, he deserves it, not necessarily for his poetry (the worth of which I can't gauge, as I’ve never been able to read it), but for his charming prose, his boundless spirit, and the inexplicable joy of his writing, creating gentle miracles like the natural growth of grass and flowers. Like many gentle writers, his work sometimes showed signs of pretentiousness, but in the next moment, a rich, natural vibrancy would surge forth and conceal it completely. I knew him a little, and (thankfully, few English celebrities I happened to meet have freed my pen with their passing, and I take no liberties with the living) I will wrap up this wandering article by recalling my first meeting with Leigh Hunt.

He was then at Hammersmith, occupying a very plain and shabby little house, in a contiguous range of others like it, with no prospect but that of an ugly village street, and certainly nothing to gratify his craving for a tasteful environment, inside or out. A slatternly maid-servant opened the door for us, and he himself stood in the entry, a beautiful and venerable old man, buttoned to the chin in a black dress-coat, tall and slender, with a countenance quietly alive all over, and the gentlest and most naturally courteous manner. He ushered us into his little study, or parlor, or both,—a very forlorn room, with poor paper-hangings and carpet, few books, no pictures that I remember, and an awful lack of upholstery. I touch distinctly upon these external blemishes and this nudity of adornment, not that they would be worth mentioning in a sketch of other remarkable persons, but because Leigh Hunt was born with such a faculty of enjoying all beautiful things that it seemed as if Fortune, did him as much wrong in not supplying them as in withholding a sufficiency of vital breath from ordinary men. All kinds of mild magnificence, tempered by his taste, would have become him well; but he had not the grim dignity that assumes nakedness as the better robe.

He was living in Hammersmith, in a very plain and shabby little house, part of a row of similar homes, with only the view of an unattractive village street ahead of him, and nothing to satisfy his desire for a nice environment, inside or outside. A messy maid answered the door for us, and he himself stood in the entryway, a beautiful and dignified old man, tightly buttoned up in a black dress coat, tall and slender, with a lively and gentle face and the most naturally courteous demeanor. He led us into his small study or parlor, which felt rather forlorn, with shabby wallpaper and carpet, a few books, no memories of any pictures, and a complete lack of comfortable furniture. I emphasize these external flaws and this starkness not because they would be noteworthy in a description of others of distinction, but because Leigh Hunt had a natural ability to appreciate all things beautiful, making it seem as if fate wronged him as much by not providing those things as it would by denying ordinary people sufficient life. Various forms of understated elegance, shaped by his taste, would have suited him well; however, he didn’t possess the grim dignity that embraces nakedness as a superior garment.

I have said that he was a beautiful old man. In truth, I never saw a finer countenance, either as to the mould of features or the expression, nor any that showed the play of feeling so perfectly without the slightest theatrical emphasis. It was like a child's face in this respect. At my first glimpse of him, when he met us in the entry, I discerned that he was old, his long hair being white and his wrinkles many; it was an aged visage, in short, such as I had not at all expected to see, in spite of dates, because his books talk to the reader with the tender vivacity of youth. But when he began to speak, and as he grew more earnest in conversation, I ceased to be sensible of his age; sometimes, indeed, its dusky shadow darkened through the gleam which his sprightly thoughts diffused about his face, but then another flash of youth came out of his eyes and made an illumination again. I never witnessed such a wonderfully illusive transformation, before or since; and, to this day, trusting only to my recollection, I should find it difficult to decide which was his genuine and stable predicament,—youth or age. I have met no Englishman whose manners seemed to me so agreeable, soft, rather than polished, wholly unconventional, the natural growth of a kindly and sensitive disposition without any reference to rule, or else obedient to some rule so subtile that the nicest observer could not detect the application of it.

I’ve said he was a beautiful old man. Honestly, I’ve never seen a better face, both in terms of features and expression, nor anyone who conveyed emotion so genuinely without any hint of acting. It was like a child's face in that way. When I first saw him, as he greeted us in the entry, I realized he was old; his long hair was white and he had many wrinkles. It was an elderly face, certainly not what I expected to see, despite what the dates suggested, because his books speak to the reader with the tender energy of youth. But as he started to talk and became more engaged in conversation, I stopped noticing his age. At times, his age would cast a shadow over the brightness of his lively thoughts, but then another spark of youth would shine from his eyes, lighting him up again. I’ve never seen such a remarkable and deceptive transformation, before or since; even now, just relying on my memory, I’d find it hard to tell which state was truly his—youth or age. I’ve met no Englishman whose manners seemed as pleasant to me, soft rather than polished, completely unconventional, a natural result of a kind and sensitive personality without regard to rules, or possibly following some subtle rule that even the most observant person couldn’t identify.

His eyes were dark and very fine, and his delightful voice accompanied their visible language like music. He appeared to be exceedingly appreciative of whatever was passing among those who surrounded him, and especially of the vicissitudes in the consciousness of the person to whom he happened to be addressing himself at the moment. I felt that no effect upon my mind of what he uttered, no emotion, however transitory, in myself, escaped his notice, though not from any positive vigilance on his part, but because his faculty of observation was so penetrative and delicate; and to say the truth, it a little confused me to discern always a ripple on his mobile face, responsive to any slightest breeze that passed over the inner reservoir of my sentiments, and seemed thence to extend to a similar reservoir within himself. On matters of feeling, and within a certain depth, you might spare yourself the trouble of utterance, because he already knew what you wanted to say, and perhaps a little more than you would have spoken. His figure was full of gentle movement, though, somehow, without disturbing its quietude; and as he talked, he kept folding his hands nervously, and betokened in many ways a fine and immediate sensibility, quick to feel pleasure or pain, though scarcely capable, I should imagine, of a passionate experience in either direction. There was not am English trait in him from head to foot, morally, intellectually, or physically. Beef, ale, or stout, brandy or port-wine, entered not at all into his composition. In his earlier life, he appears to have given evidences of courage and sturdy principle, and of a tendency to fling himself into the rough struggle of humanity on the liberal side. It would be taking too much upon myself to affirm that this was merely a projection of his fancy world into the actual, and that he never could have hit a downright blow, and was altogether an unsuitable person to receive one. I beheld him not in his armor, but in his peacefulest robes. Nevertheless, drawing my conclusion merely from what I saw, it would have occurred to me that his main deficiency was a lack of grit. Though anything but a timid man, the combative and defensive elements were not prominently developed in his character, and could have been made available only when he put an unnatural force upon his instincts. It was on this account, and also because of the fineness of his nature generally, that the English appreciated him no better, and left this sweet and delicate poet poor, and with scanty laurels in his declining age.

His eyes were dark and striking, and his charming voice complemented their expressive language like music. He seemed to deeply appreciate everything happening among those around him, especially the changing emotions of the person he was talking to at that moment. I felt like nothing he said, no fleeting emotion within me, went unnoticed by him, not because he was watching really closely, but because his power of observation was so sharp and sensitive. To be honest, it was a little unsettling to see a constant reaction on his expressive face, responding to even the slightest shift in my feelings, which seemed to connect to a similar well of emotions within him. When it came to feelings and at a certain depth, you could spare yourself the effort of speaking because he already knew what you wanted to express, maybe even more than you would have said. His presence was full of gentle movement, yet somehow it didn’t disrupt the tranquility around him; he nervously folded his hands while talking, showing in many ways a high sensitivity, quick to react to pleasure or pain, but I imagined he wasn’t very capable of strong emotions in either direction. There was nothing distinctly English about him, morally, intellectually, or physically. He had no traces of beef, ale, stout, brandy, or port wine in him at all. In his earlier life, he seemed to show courage, strong principles, and a tendency to engage in the rough struggles of humanity on the progressive side. It would be too much to say that this was just a projection of his imaginative world onto reality, and that he could never really have delivered a solid blow, or was entirely unfit to take one. I saw him not in his battle gear, but in his most peaceful attire. Still, judging solely by what I observed, it struck me that his main shortcoming was a lack of toughness. While he was far from timid, the combative and defensive aspects of his character weren't very developed, and he could only access them by forcing himself against his instincts. For this reason, and due to the overall gentleness of his nature, the English didn’t appreciate him as they should have, leaving this sweet and delicate poet poor, with few accolades in his later years.

It was not, I think, from his American blood that Leigh Hunt derived either his amiability or his peaceful inclinations; at least, I do not see how we can reasonably claim the former quality as a national characteristic, though the latter might have been fairly inherited from his ancestors on the mother's side, who were Pennsylvania Quakers. But the kind of excellence that distinguished him—his fineness, subtilty, and grace—was that which the richest cultivation has heretofore tended to develop in the happier examples of American genius, and which (though I say it a little reluctantly) is perhaps what our future intellectual advancement may make general among us. His person, at all events, was thoroughly American, and of the best type, as were likewise his manners; for we are the best as well as the worst mannered people in the world.

I don't think Leigh Hunt's friendliness or peaceful nature came from his American heritage; at least, I don’t see how we can reasonably consider friendliness a national trait, though peacefulness might have come from his maternal ancestors, who were Pennsylvania Quakers. However, the qualities that set him apart—his refinement, subtlety, and grace—are what the best cultivation has helped develop in the most fortunate examples of American talent, and, although I say this somewhat hesitantly, it’s probably what our future intellectual growth might make common among us. His appearance was definitely American, and of the finest kind, just like his manners; because we are both the best and the worst mannered people in the world.

Leigh Hunt loved dearly to be praised. That is to say, he desired sympathy as a flower seeks sunshine, and perhaps profited by it as much in the richer depth of coloring that it imparted to his ideas. In response to all that we ventured to express about his writings (and, for my part, I went quite to the extent of my conscience, which was a long way, and there left the matter to a lady and a young girl, who happily were with me), his face shone, and he manifested great delight, with a perfect, and yet delicate, frankness for which I loved him. He could not tell us, he said, the happiness that such appreciation gave him; it always took him by surprise, he remarked, for—perhaps because he cleaned his own boots, and performed other little ordinary offices for himself— he never had been conscious of anything wonderful in his own person. And then he smiled, making himself and all the poor little parlor about him beautiful thereby. It is usually the hardest thing in the world to praise a man to his face; but Leigh Hunt received the incense with such gracious satisfaction (feeling it to be sympathy, not vulgar praise), that the only difficulty was to keep the enthusiasm of the moment within the limit of permanent opinion. A storm had suddenly come up while we were talking; the rain poured, the lightning flashed, and the thunder broke; but I hope, and have great pleasure in believing, that it was a sunny hour for Leigh Hunt. Nevertheless, it was not to my voice that he most favorably inclined his ear, but to those of my companions. Women are the fit ministers at such a shrine.

Leigh Hunt really loved to be praised. He craved attention like a flower craves sunlight, and it likely enriched his thoughts just as much as a vibrant color deepens a bloom. When we shared our thoughts on his writing (I made sure to express everything I felt, which was quite a bit, and then let a lady and a young girl who were with me take it from there), his face lit up, and he showed genuine joy with a perfect yet gentle honesty that I admired. He told us that he couldn’t put into words the happiness that such appreciation brought him; it always took him off guard, maybe because he polished his own shoes and handled other ordinary tasks himself—he never felt he had anything remarkable about him. Then he smiled, making himself and the small parlor around him more lovely. It’s usually tough to compliment someone to their face, but Leigh Hunt accepted the admiration with such warm satisfaction (seeing it as empathy, not cheap flattery) that the only challenge was to keep the excitement of the moment in check without losing the sense of lasting respect. A storm had suddenly rolled in while we were chatting; the rain fell heavily, lightning flashed, and thunder rumbled; but I hope, and I truly believe, it was a bright moment for Leigh Hunt. Still, it wasn’t to my voice that he listened most eagerly, but to those of my companions. Women are the best at such a sacred space.

He must have suffered keenly in his lifetime, and enjoyed keenly, keeping his emotions so much upon the surface as he seemed to do, and convenient for everybody to play upon. Being of a cheerful temperament, happiness had probably the upper hand. His was a light, mildly joyous nature, gentle, graceful, yet seldom attaining to that deepest grace which results from power; for beauty, like woman, its human representative, dallies with the gentle, but yields its consummate favor only to the strong. I imagine that Leigh Bunt may have been more beautiful when I met him, both in person and character, than in his earlier days. As a young man, I could conceive of his being finical in certain moods, but not now, when the gravity of age shed a venerable grace about him. I rejoiced to hear him say that he was favored with most confident and cheering anticipations in respect to a future life; and there were abundant proofs, throughout our interview, of an unrepining spirit, resignation, quiet, relinquishment of the worldly benefits that were denied him, thankful enjoyment of whatever he had to enjoy, and piety, and hope shining onward into the dusk,—all of which gave a reverential cast to the feeling with which we parted from him. I wish that he could have had one full draught of prosperity before he died. As a matter of artistic propriety, it would have been delightful to see him inhabiting a beautiful house of his own, in an Italian climate, with all sorts of elaborate upholstery and minute elegances about him, and a succession of tender and lovely women to praise his sweet poetry from morning to night. I hardly know whether it is my fault, or the effect of a weakness in Leigh Haunt's character, that I should be sensible of a regret of this nature, when, at the same time, I sincerely believe that he has found an infinity of better things in the world whither he has gone.

He must have experienced a lot of pain and joy in his lifetime, wearing his emotions on his sleeve, making it easy for everyone to engage with him. Being naturally cheerful, happiness likely dominated his life. He had a light, gently joyful personality—kind and graceful, but rarely reaching the profound beauty that comes from strength; like women, beauty tends to favor the gentle but reserves its highest praise for the strong. I think Leigh Bunt may have been more beautiful when I met him, both in looks and character, than he was in his younger days. As a young man, I could imagine him being somewhat particular in certain moods, but not now, as age has lent him a dignified grace. I was glad to hear him express that he was filled with confident and uplifting hopes regarding the afterlife; throughout our conversation, he showed signs of a calm spirit, acceptance, and a quiet letting go of the worldly comforts that eluded him, gratefully savoring whatever joys he had, along with a sense of piety and hope that illuminated the darkness ahead—all of which filled our farewell with a sense of respect. I wish he could have experienced one full taste of prosperity before he passed away. For artistic reasons, it would have been wonderful to see him living in a beautiful home of his own, in an Italian climate, surrounded by luxurious furnishings and delicate details, with a stream of loving and affectionate women celebrating his sweet poetry all day long. I'm not sure if this sense of regret is my fault or a reflection of a flaw in Leigh Haunt's character, but I can’t help feeling this way, even while I truly believe he has found far better things in the world he’s gone to.

At our leave-taking he grasped me warmly by both hands, and seemed as much interested in our whole party as if he had known us for years. All this was genuine feeling, a quick, luxuriant growth out of his heart, which was a soil for flower-seeds of rich and rare varieties, not acorns, but a true heart, nevertheless. Several years afterwards I met him for the last time at a London dinner-party, looking sadly broken down by infirmities; and my final recollection of the beautiful old man presents him arm in arm with, nay, if I mistake not, partly embraced and supported by, another beloved and honored poet, whose minstrel-name, since he has a week-day one for his personal occasions, I will venture to speak. It was Barry Cornwall, whose kind introduction had first made me known to Leigh Hunt.

As we said our goodbyes, he warmly grasped my hands and seemed genuinely interested in our entire group as if he had known us for years. This was all heartfelt emotion, a quick and rich expression from his heart, which was a fertile ground for beautiful and rare seeds, not just ordinary ones, but a truly kind heart nonetheless. Several years later, I saw him one last time at a London dinner party, looking sadly worn down by health issues; and my final memory of the wonderful old man is of him arm in arm with, and if I’m not mistaken, partly embraced and supported by, another beloved and respected poet, whose stage name I feel comfortable mentioning since he has a regular name for personal matters. It was Barry Cornwall, whose kind introduction first connected me to Leigh Hunt.





OUTSIDE GLIMPSES OF ENGLISH POVERTY.

Becoming an inhabitant of a great English town, I often turned aside from the prosperous thoroughfares (where the edifices, the shops, and the bustling crowd differed not so much from scenes with which I was familiar in my own country), and went designedly astray among precincts that reminded me of some of Dickens's grimiest pages. There I caught glimpses of a people and a mode of life that were comparatively new to my observation, a sort of sombre phantasmagoric spectacle, exceedingly undelightful to behold, yet involving a singular interest and even fascination in its ugliness.

Becoming a resident of a major English city, I often veered away from the busy main streets (where the buildings, shops, and lively crowds were not so different from scenes I knew back home), and intentionally wandered into areas that reminded me of some of Dickens's darkest stories. There, I caught glimpses of people and a way of life that were relatively new to me, a kind of dark, surreal show that was quite unpleasant to witness, yet held a unique interest and even fascination in its ugliness.

Dirt, one would fancy, is plenty enough all over the world, being the symbolic accompaniment of the foul incrustation which began to settle over and bedim all earthly things as soon as Eve had bitten the apple; ever since which hapless epoch, her daughters have chiefly been engaged in a desperate and unavailing struggle to get rid of it. But the dirt of a poverty-stricken English street is a monstrosity unknown on our side of the Atlantic. It reigns supreme within its own limits, and is inconceivable everywhere beyond them. We enjoy the great advantage, that the brightness and dryness of our atmosphere keep everything clean that the sun shines upon, converting the larger portion of our impurities into transitory dust which the next wind can sweep away, in contrast with the damp, adhesive grime that incorporates itself with all surfaces (unless continually and painfully cleansed) in the chill moisture of the English air. Then the all-pervading smoke of the city, abundantly intermingled with the sable snow-flakes of bituminous coal, hovering overhead, descending, and alighting on pavements and rich architectural fronts, on the snowy muslin of the ladies, and the gentlemen's starched collars and shirt-bosoms, invests even the better streets in a half-mourning garb. It is beyond the resources of Wealth to keep the smut away from its premises or its own fingers' ends; and as for Poverty, it surrenders itself to the dark influence without a struggle. Along with disastrous circumstances, pinching need, adversity so lengthened out as to constitute the rule of life, there comes a certain chill depression of the spirits which seems especially to shudder at cold water. In view of so wretched a state of things, we accept the ancient Deluge not merely as an insulated phenomenon, but as a periodical necessity, and acknowledge that nothing less than such a general washing-day could suffice to cleanse the slovenly old world of its moral and material dirt.

Dirt, you'd think, is everywhere in the world, symbolizing the grime that began to settle over and dull all earthly things the moment Eve took a bite of the apple; ever since that unfortunate time, her daughters have mostly been trapped in a relentless and pointless struggle to get rid of it. But the dirt on a poor English street is a horror unmatched on this side of the Atlantic. It rules supreme within its own bounds and is unimaginable anywhere outside those limits. We benefit from the fact that the brightness and dryness of our atmosphere keep everything clean that the sun touches, turning most of our mess into temporary dust that the next wind can blow away, unlike the damp, sticky grime that clings to all surfaces (unless they are constantly and painfully cleaned) in the chilly moisture of the English air. Then there's the ever-present smoke from the city, mixed in with the dark snowflakes of coal, hanging overhead, falling, and settling on sidewalks and beautiful buildings, on the white fabric of ladies' dresses, and on gentlemen's starched collars and shirts, giving even the nicer streets a half-mourning look. Not even Wealth can keep the soot away from its property or its own fingertips; and as for Poverty, it accepts the dark presence without a fight. Along with terrible circumstances, constant need, and prolonged adversity that becomes the norm, there comes a certain cold melancholy that seems particularly to shudder at cold water. Given such a miserable situation, we consider the ancient Flood not just as an isolated event, but as a periodic necessity, admitting that nothing less than a thorough cleansing day could possibly wash the messy old world of its moral and material filth.

Gin-shops, or what the English call spirit-vaults, are numerous in the vicinity of these poor streets, and are set off with the magnificence of gilded door-posts, tarnished by contact with the unclean customers who haunt there. Ragged children come thither with old shaving-mugs, or broken-nosed teapots, or ally such makeshift receptacle, to get a little poison or madness for their parents, who deserve no better requital at their hands for having engendered them. Inconceivably sluttish women enter at noonday and stand at the counter among boon-companions of both sexes, stirring up misery and jollity in a bumper together, and quaffing off the mixture with a relish. As for the men, they lounge there continually, drinking till they are drunken,—drinking as long as they have a half-penny left, and then, as it seemed to me, waiting for a sixpenny miracle to be wrought in their pockets so as to enable them to be drunken again. Most of these establishments have a significant advertisement of "Beds," doubtless for the accommodation of their customers in the interval between one intoxication and the next. I never could find it in my heart, however, utterly to condemn these sad revellers, and should certainly wait till I had some better consolation to offer before depriving them of their dram of gin, though death itself were in the glass; for methought their poor souls needed such fiery stimulant to lift them a little way out of the smothering squalor of both their outward and interior life, giving them glimpses and suggestions, even if bewildering ones, of a spiritual existence that limited their present misery. The temperance-reformers unquestionably derive their commission from the Divine Beneficence, but have never been taken fully into its counsels. All may not be lost, though those good men fail.

Gin shops, or what the English call spirit vaults, are all over these poor streets, flaunting gilded doorposts that have become dull from being touched by the dirty customers who hang out there. Ragged kids come by with old shaving mugs, broken teapots, or any makeshift container to get a little poison or madness for their parents, who probably deserve no better reward for bringing them into this world. Incredibly messy women walk in during the day and stand at the counter among friends of both genders, mixing misery with merriment while drinking it all down with enjoyment. As for the men, they linger there endlessly, drinking until they’re drunk—drinking as long as they have a penny left, and then, it seemed to me, just waiting for a miracle to happen in their pockets so they could get drunk again. Most of these places prominently advertise "Beds," likely for their customers to crash in between drinking binges. I never could bring myself to completely judge these sad partiers, and I would definitely wait until I had something better to offer before taking away their drink, even if death itself were in the glass; because I thought their poor souls needed such fiery spirits to lift them just a little out of the suffocating misery of their external and internal lives, even if it only gave them confusing glimpses of a spiritual existence that eased their current suffering. The temperance reformers undoubtedly get their mission from Divine Goodness, but they’ve never been fully included in its plans. All may not be lost, even if those good people fail.

Pawnbrokers' establishments, distinguished by the mystic symbol of the three golden balls, were conveniently accessible; though what personal property these wretched people could possess, capable of being estimated in silver or copper, so as to afford a basis for a loan, was a problem that still perplexes me. Old clothesmen, likewise, dwelt hard by, and hung out ancient garments to dangle in the wind. There were butchers' shops, too, of a class adapted to the neighborhood, presenting no such generously fattened carcasses as Englishmen love to gaze at in the market, no stupendous halves of mighty beeves, no dead hogs or muttons ornamented with carved bas-reliefs of fat on their ribs and shoulders, in a peculiarly British style of art,—not these, but bits and gobbets of lean meat, selvages snipt off from steaks, tough and stringy morsels, bare bones smitten away from joints by the cleaver, tripe, liver, bullocks' feet, or whatever else was cheapest and divisible into the smallest lots. I am afraid that even such delicacies came to many of their tables hardly oftener than Christmas. In the windows of other little shops you saw half a dozen wizened herrings, some eggs in a basket, looking so dingily antique that your imagination smelt them, fly-speckled biscuits, segments of a hungry cheese, pipes and papers of tobacco. Now and then a sturdy milk-woman passed by with a wooden yoke over her shoulders, supporting a pail on either side, filled with a whitish fluid, the composition of which was water and chalk and the milk of a sickly cow, who gave the best she had, poor thing! but could scarcely make it rich or wholesome, spending her life in some close city-nook and pasturing on strange food. I have seen, once or twice, a donkey coming into one of these streets with panniers full of vegetables, and departing with a return cargo of what looked like rubbish and street-sweepings. No other commerce seemed to exist, except, possibly, a girl might offer you a pair of stockings or a worked collar, or a man whisper something mysterious about wonderfully cheap cigars. And yet I remember seeing female hucksters in those regions, with their wares on the edge of the sidewalk and their own seats right in the carriage-way, pretending to sell half-decayed oranges and apples, toffy, Ormskirk cakes, combs, and cheap jewelry, the coarsest kind of crockery, and little plates of oysters,—knitting patiently all day long, and removing their undiminished stock in trade at nightfall. All indispensable importations from other quarters of the town were on a remarkably diminutive scale: for example, the wealthier inhabitants purchased their coal by the wheelbarrow-load, and the poorer ones by the peck-measure. It was a curious and melancholy spectacle, when an overladen coal-cart happened to pass through the street and drop a handful or two of its burden in the mud, to see half a dozen women and children scrambling for the treasure-trove, like a flock of hens and chickens gobbling up some spilt corn. In this connection I may as well mention a commodity of boiled snails (for such they appeared to me, though probably a marine production) which used to be peddled from door to door, piping hot, as an article of cheap nutriment.

Pawnbrokers' shops, marked by the mysterious symbol of three golden balls, were easy to find; though the kind of personal belongings these unfortunate people possessed that could be valued in silver or copper for a loan still puzzles me. Nearby, secondhand clothing sellers also had their shops, with old clothes flapping in the wind. There were butcher shops too, suited to the area, but they didn’t offer the well-fattened meats that Brits love to see at the market. No massive cuts of beef, no pigs or sheep adorned with elaborate fat, typical of British style—just small pieces of lean meat, scraps trimmed off steaks, tough and stringy bits, bare bones left over from joints, tripe, liver, cow's feet, or whatever was the cheapest and could be sold in tiny portions. I fear that even these delicacies made it to many tables only around Christmas. In other small shop windows, you could see a few shriveled herring, some eggs in a basket that looked so old your imagination could almost smell them, fly-specked biscuits, chunks of starved cheese, pipes and packs of tobacco. Occasionally, a sturdy milkwoman would pass by with a wooden yoke over her shoulders, carrying a pail on each side filled with a liquid that was mostly water and chalk mixed with the milk from a sick cow, poor thing, who gave all she had but couldn’t produce anything rich or nutritious, spending her life in some cramped city corner eating strange food. I’ve seen a donkey come into these streets once or twice, loaded with vegetables and leaving with what looked like trash and street sweepings. No other business seemed to be happening except, perhaps, a girl offering a pair of stockings or a decorative collar, or a man whispering mysteriously about super cheap cigars. Yet, I remember seeing women selling their goods on the sidewalk, sitting directly in the street, pretending to sell half-rotten oranges and apples, toffee, Ormskirk cakes, combs, cheap jewelry, crude pottery, and little plates of oysters—knitting patiently all day long and taking their unsold items home at night. All essential goods brought in from other parts of town were on a very small scale: for instance, the richer folks bought their coal by the wheelbarrow, while the poorer ones bought it by the peck. It was a strange and sad sight when an overloaded coal cart passed through the street and dropped a few handfuls of its load in the mud, seeing women and children scramble for the treasure like hens and chicks pecking at spilled corn. In connection with this, I should mention boiled snails (or so they appeared to me, though they might have been from the sea) which used to be sold door to door, hot and served as a cheap source of food.

The population of these dismal abodes appeared to consider the sidewalks and middle of the street as their common hall. In a drama of low life, the unity of place might be arranged rigidly according to the classic rule, and the street be the one locality in which every scene and incident should occur. Courtship, quarrels, plot and counterplot, conspiracies for robbery and murder, family difficulties or agreements,— all such matters, I doubt not, are constantly discussed or transacted in this sky-roofed saloon, so regally hung with its sombre canopy of coal-smoke. Whatever the disadvantages of the English climate, the only comfortable or wholesome part of life, for the city poor, must be spent in the open air. The stifled and squalid rooms where they lie down at night, whole families and neighborhoods together, or sulkily elbow one another in the daytime, when a settled rain drives them within doors, are worse horrors than it is worth while (without a practical object in view) to admit into one's imagination. No wonder that they creep forth from the foul mystery of their interiors, stumble down from their garrets, or scramble up out of their cellars, on the upper step of which you may see the grimy housewife, before the shower is ended, letting the raindrops gutter down her visage; while her children (an impish progeny of cavernous recesses below the common sphere of humanity) swarm into the daylight and attain all that they know of personal purification in the nearest mud-puddle. It might almost make a man doubt the existence of his own soul, to observe how Nature has flung these little wretches into the street and left them there, so evidently regarding them as nothing worth, and how all mankind acquiesce in the great mother's estimate of her offspring. For, if they are to have no immortality, what superior claim can I assert for mine? And how difficult to believe that anything so precious as a germ of immortal growth can have been buried under this dirt-heap, plunged into this cesspool of misery and vice! As often as I beheld the scene, it affected me with surprise and loathsome interest, much resembling, though in a far intenser degree, the feeling with which, when a boy, I used to turn over a plank or an old log that had long lain on the damp ground, and found a vivacious multitude of unclean and devilish-looking insects scampering to and fro beneath it. Without an infinite faith, there seemed as much prospect of a blessed futurity for those hideous hugs and many-footed worms as for these brethren of our humanity and co-heirs of all our heavenly inheritance. Ah, what a mystery! Slowly, slowly, as after groping at the bottom of a deep, noisome, stagnant pool, my hope struggles upward to the surface, bearing the half-drowned body of a child along with it, and heaving it aloft for its life, and my own life, and all our lives. Unless these slime-clogged nostrils can be made capable of inhaling celestial air, I know not how the purest and most intellectual of us can reasonably expect ever to taste a breath of it. The whole question of eternity is staked there. If a single one of those helpless little ones be lost, the world is lost!

The people living in these grim places seemed to see the sidewalks and the street as their communal gathering space. In a story of harsh realities, the setting could be arranged strictly by classic rules, with the street being the only place where every scene and event takes place. Romantic encounters, fights, schemes and counter-schemes, plans for theft and murder, family troubles or agreements—I'm sure all these things are constantly discussed or happen in this open-air lounge, draped regally with its dark cloud of coal smoke. Despite the drawbacks of the English climate, the only comfortable or healthy part of life for the urban poor must happen outdoors. The cramped and filthy rooms where they sleep at night, with entire families packed together, or irritably bumping into each other during the day when it rains, are worse horrors than it's worth to imagine (without a practical purpose). It’s no surprise they venture out from the grim mystery of their homes, clambering down from their attics or scrambling up from their basements, where you might see the dirty housewife standing in the doorway, letting raindrops trickle down her face; while her children (mischievous offspring from the dark corners below our shared human world) rush into the daylight, achieving whatever cleansing they can in the nearest mud puddle. It could almost make someone question the existence of their own soul, seeing how Nature has cast these little wretches into the street and left them there, clearly viewing them as worthless, and how everyone goes along with Mother Nature's judgment of her children. If they don’t have any chance at immortality, what right do I have to claim it for my own? And how hard is it to believe that something as precious as the seed of eternal life could be buried under this heap of filth, dumped into this pit of suffering and vice! Every time I saw this scene, I was struck with a mix of shock and repulsion, similar to the much stronger feeling I had as a boy when I turned over a plank or an old log that had been lying on the damp ground and found a writhing mass of disgusting-looking insects scuttling about underneath. Without boundless faith, it seemed as likely for those creepy crawlers and many-legged worms to have a blessed future as for these brothers and sisters of our humanity, sharing in our entire heavenly legacy. Ah, what a mystery! Slowly, slowly, like pulling my hope from the depths of a deep, foul, stagnant pool, it rises to the surface, bringing along with it the half-drowned body of a child, struggling for its life, for my life, and for all our lives. Unless these slime-filled nostrils can be made capable of breathing in divine air, I don’t know how even the purest and smartest among us can reasonably expect to ever experience it. The entire question of eternity hinges on this. If even one of those helpless little ones is lost, the world is lost!

The women and children greatly preponderate in such places; the men probably wandering abroad in quest of that daily miracle, a dinner and a drink, or perhaps slumbering in the daylight that they may the better follow out their cat-like rambles through the dark. Here are women with young figures, but old, wrinkled, yellow faces, fanned and blear-eyed with the smoke which they cannot spare from their scanty fires,—it being too precious for its warmth to be swallowed by the chimney. Some of them sit on the doorsteps, nursing their unwashed babies at bosoms which we will glance aside from, for the sake of our mothers and all womanhood, because the fairest spectacle is here the foulest. Yet motherhood, in these dark abodes, is strangely identical with what we have all known it to be in the happiest homes. Nothing, as I remember, smote me with more grief and pity (all the more poignant because perplexingly entangled with an inclination to smile) than to hear a gaunt and ragged mother priding herself on the pretty ways of her ragged and skinny infant, just as a young matron might, when she invites her lady friends to admire her plump, white-robed darling in the nursery. Indeed, no womanly characteristic seemed to have altogether perished out of these poor souls. It was the very same creature whose tender torments make the rapture of our young days, whom we love, cherish, and protect, and rely upon in life and death, and whom we delight to see beautify her beauty with rich robes and set it off with jewels, though now fantastically masquerading in a garb of tatters, wholly unfit for her to handle. I recognized her, over and over again, in the groups round a doorstep or in the descent of a cellar, chatting with prodigious earnestness about intangible trifles, laughing for a little jest, sympathizing at almost the same instant with one neighbor's sunshine and another's shadow, wise, simple, sly, and patient, yet easily perturbed, and breaking into small feminine ebullitions of spite, wrath, and jealousy, tornadoes of a moment, such as vary the social atmosphere of her silken-skirted sisters, though smothered into propriety by dint of a well-bred habit. Not that there was an absolute deficiency of good-breeding, even here. It often surprised me to witness a courtesy and deference among these ragged folks, which, having seen it, I did not thoroughly believe in, wondering whence it should have come. I am persuaded, however, that there were laws of intercourse which they never violated,—a code of the cellar, the garret, the common staircase, the doorstep, and the pavement, which perhaps had as deep a foundation in natural fitness as the code of the drawing-room.

The women and children dominate these places; the men are likely out searching for that daily miracle, a meal and a drink, or maybe napping during the day so they can better pursue their nighttime explorations. Here, women have youthful bodies but old, wrinkled, yellow faces, tired and bleary from the smoke they can’t afford to let escape from their meager fires—it’s too valuable for its warmth to be wasted in the chimney. Some sit on the doorsteps, nursing their unwashed babies at chests we would rather not look at, out of respect for our mothers and all women, because the most beautiful sight here is also the most troubling. Yet, motherhood in these dark places strangely resembles what we’ve all known in happier homes. Nothing struck me with more sadness and empathy (even more intense because it was intertwined with a strange urge to smile) than hearing a thin, ragged mother proudly talk about the cute ways of her scruffy, skinny baby, just like a young mom might when she shows her friends her chubby, well-dressed darling in the nursery. In fact, no trace of femininity seemed to have completely vanished from these poor women. It was the same essence whose loving struggles brought joy to our childhood, whom we love, cherish, and depend on in life and death, and whom we love to see enhance her beauty with fancy clothes and jewelry, though now she was bizarrely dressed in rags no woman should have to wear. I recognized her again and again in groups around doorsteps or down in cellars, deeply engrossed in conversations about trivial things, laughing at a small joke, sympathizing almost simultaneously with one neighbor’s happiness and another’s sorrow, wise, simple, clever, and patient, yet easily unsettled, bursting into brief displays of spite, anger, and jealousy—miniature tornadoes that change the social atmosphere just like those of her more privileged sisters, though stifled into propriety by good manners. Not that there was a complete lack of good manners here either. I was often surprised to see courtesy and respect among these ragged people, which, having witnessed it, I found hard to fully accept, wondering where it could have come from. However, I believe there were rules of interaction they never broke—a code for the cellar, the attic, the shared staircase, the doorstep, and the pavement, which perhaps had just as solid a basis in natural order as the etiquette of the drawing-room.

Yet again I doubt whether I may not have been uttering folly in the last two sentences, when I reflect how rude and rough these specimens of feminine character generally were. They had a readiness with their hands that reminded me of Molly Seagrim and other heroines in Fielding's novels. For example, I have seen a woman meet a man in the street, and, for no reason perceptible to me, suddenly clutch him by the hair and cuff his ears,—an infliction which he bore with exemplary patience, only snatching the very earliest opportunity to take to his heels. Where a sharp tongue will not serve the purpose, they trust to the sharpness of their finger-nails, or incarnate a whole vocabulary of vituperative words in a resounding slap, or the downright blow of a doubled fist. All English people, I imagine, are influenced in a far greater degree than ourselves by this simple and honest tendency, in cases of disagreement, to batter one another's persons; and whoever has seen a crowd of English ladies (for instance, at the door of the Sistine Chapel, in Holy Week) will be satisfied that their belligerent propensities are kept in abeyance only by a merciless rigor on the part of society. It requires a vast deal of refinement to spiritualize their large physical endowments. Such being the case with the delicate ornaments of the drawing-room, it is the less to be wondered at that women who live mostly in the open air, amid the coarsest kind of companionship and occupation, should carry on the intercourse of life with a freedom unknown to any class of American females, though still, I am resolved to think, compatible with a generous breadth of natural propriety. It shocked me, at first, to see them (of all ages, even elderly, as well as infants that could just toddle across the street alone) going about in the mud and mire, or through the dusky snow and slosh of a severe week in winter, with petticoats high uplifted above bare, red feet and legs; but I was comforted by observing that both shoes and stockings generally reappeared with better weather, having been thriftily kept out of the damp for the convenience of dry feet within doors. Their hardihood was wonderful, and their strength greater than could have been expected from such spare diet as they probably lived upon. I have seen them carrying on their heads great burdens under which they walked as freely as if they were fashionable bonnets; or sometimes the burden was huge enough almost to cover the whole person, looked at from behind,—as in Tuscan villages you may see the girls coming in from the country with great bundles of green twigs upon their backs, so that they resemble locomotive masses of verdure and fragrance. But these poor English women seemed to be laden with rubbish, incongruous and indescribable, such as bones and rags, the sweepings of the house and of the street, a merchandise gathered up from what poverty itself had thrown away, a heap of filthy stuff analogous to Christian's bundle of sin.

Yet again I wonder if I was being foolish in the last two sentences when I think about how rude and rough these examples of feminine character usually were. They had a readiness with their hands that reminded me of Molly Seagrim and other heroines in Fielding's novels. For instance, I've seen a woman bump into a man on the street and, for no obvious reason, suddenly grab him by the hair and slap his ears—something he tolerated with impressive patience, only seizing the very first opportunity to run away. When a sharp tongue won’t do the trick, they rely on the sharpness of their fingernails or express a whole vocabulary of insults with a resounding slap or a solid punch. I imagine all English people are influenced to a much greater extent than we are by this straightforward and honest tendency, in disagreements, to physically assault one another; and anyone who’s seen a crowd of English ladies (for example, at the door of the Sistine Chapel during Holy Week) would be convinced that their aggressive tendencies are kept in check only by the ruthless strictness of society. It takes a significant amount of refinement to elevate their substantial physical attributes. Given that this applies to the delicate fixtures of the drawing room, it’s less surprising that women who mostly live outdoors, in the roughest kind of company and work, interact freely in a way that no group of American women would, though I still believe it's compatible with a generous sense of natural propriety. I was shocked at first to see them (of all ages, even elderly women, as well as toddlers just learning to walk) trudging through the mud and slush, or through the grimy snow during a harsh winter week, with their skirts pulled high over bare, red feet and legs; but I was reassured to see that both shoes and stockings generally returned with better weather, having been wisely kept dry for comfort indoors. Their toughness was remarkable, and their strength greater than I would have expected from such a meager diet. I've seen them carrying heavy loads on their heads, walking as easily as if they were wearing stylish bonnets; sometimes the burden was almost large enough to cover their entire body from behind—like in Tuscan villages where you might see girls coming in from the countryside with large bundles of green twigs on their backs, making them look like moving masses of greenery and fragrance. But these poor English women seemed to be carrying garbage, strange and indescribable items like bones and rags, the remnants from houses and streets, a collection of trash that poverty itself had discarded, a heap of filthy objects reminiscent of Christian's bundle of sin.

Sometimes, though very seldom, I detected a certain gracefulness among the younger women that was altogether new to my observation. It was a charm proper to the lowest class. One girl I particularly remember, in a garb none of the cleanest and nowise smart, and herself exceedingly coarse in all respects, but yet endowed with a sort of witchery, a native charm, a robe of simple beauty and suitable behavior that she was born in and had never been tempted to throw off, because she had really nothing else to put on. Eve herself could not have been more natural. Nothing was affected, nothing imitated; no proper grace was vulgarized by an effort to assume the manners or adornments of another sphere. This kind of beauty, arrayed in a fitness of its own, is probably vanishing out of the world, and will certainly never be found in America, where all the girls, whether daughters of the upper-tendon, the mediocrity, the cottage, or the kennel, aim at one standard of dress and deportment, seldom accomplishing a perfectly triumphant hit or an utterly absurd failure. Those words, "genteel" and "ladylike," are terrible ones and do us infinite mischief, but it is because (at least, I hope so) we are in a transition state, and shall emerge into a higher mode of simplicity than has ever been known to past ages.

Sometimes, though very rarely, I noticed a certain gracefulness among the younger women that was completely new to me. It was a charm typical of the lower class. One girl I particularly remember, dressed in clothes that were anything but clean and certainly not stylish, and herself quite coarse in every way, still possessed a kind of magic, a natural charm, a simple beauty and appropriate behavior that seemed to be inherent to her and she had never been tempted to abandon, because she really had nothing else to wear. Eve herself couldn’t have seemed more natural. Nothing about her was forced or put on; no natural grace was marred by an attempt to adopt the manners or trappings of another class. This kind of beauty, adorned in its own fitting way, is probably disappearing from the world and certainly won't be found in America, where all the girls, whether from wealthy families, the middle class, the countryside, or the slums, strive for one standard of dress and behavior, rarely achieving a perfect success or a complete failure. Those words, "genteel" and "ladylike," are dreadful and cause us immense trouble, but it’s because (at least I hope so) we are in a transitional phase and will soon arrive at a higher form of simplicity than has ever been known in previous ages.

In such disastrous circumstances as I have been attempting to describe, it was beautiful to observe what a mysterious efficacy still asserted itself in character. A woman, evidently poor as the poorest of her neighbors, would be knitting or sewing on the doorstep, just as fifty other women were; but round about her skirts (though wofully patched) you would be sensible of a certain sphere of decency, which, it seemed to me, could not have been kept more impregnable in the cosiest little sitting-room, where the tea-kettle on the hob was humming its good old song of domestic peace. Maidenhood had a similar power. The evil habit that grows upon us in this harsh world makes me faithless to my own better perceptions; and yet I have seen girls in these wretched streets, on whose virgin purity, judging merely from their impression on my instincts as they passed by, I should have deemed it safe, at the moment, to stake my life. The next moment, however, as the surrounding flood of moral uncleanness surged over their footsteps, I would not have staked a spike of thistle-down on the same wager. Yet the miracle was within the scope of Providence, which is equally wise and equally beneficent (even to those poor girls, though I acknowledge the fact without the remotest comprehension of the mode of it), whether they were pure or what we fellow-sinners call vile. Unless your faith be deep-rooted and of most vigorous growth, it is the safer way not to turn aside into this region so suggestive of miserable doubt. It was a place "with dreadful faces thronged," wrinkled and grim with vice and wretchedness; and, thinking over the line of Milton here quoted, I come to the conclusion that those ugly lineaments which startled Adam and Eve, as they looked backward to the closed gate of Paradise, were no fiends from the pit, but the more terrible foreshadowings of what so many of their descendants were to be. God help them, and us likewise, their brethren and sisters! Let me add, that, forlorn, ragged, careworn, hopeless, dirty, haggard, hungry, as they were, the most pitiful thing of all was to see the sort of patience with which they accepted their lot, as if they had been born into the world for that and nothing else. Even the little children had this characteristic in as perfect development as their grandmothers.

In such terrible circumstances that I've been trying to describe, it was striking to see how a mysterious strength still showed itself in character. A woman, clearly as poor as the poorest of her neighbors, would be knitting or sewing on the doorstep, just like fifty other women were; but around her tattered skirts (though sadly patched), you could feel a certain aura of decency that seemed more secure than in the coziest little sitting room, where the tea kettle on the stove was humming its familiar tune of domestic peace. Maidenhood had a similar power. The bad habits that we develop in this harsh world make me doubt my better instincts; yet, I have seen girls in these miserable streets whose purity, simply judging from the impression they left on me as they passed by, made me feel I could safely stake my life on it at that moment. The next moment, however, as the surrounding wave of moral dirtiness rushed over their steps, I wouldn’t have bet a single piece of thistle fluff on the same gamble. Yet the miracle was within the reach of Providence, which is equally wise and equally kind (even to those poor girls, though I admit I don't understand how it works), whether they were pure or what we fellow sinners call vile. Unless your faith is deeply rooted and robust, it’s safer not to venture into this area that suggests deep doubt. It was a place "with dreadful faces thronged," wrinkled and grim with vice and misery; and, reflecting on Milton’s line quoted here, I conclude that those ugly faces that shocked Adam and Eve as they looked back at the closed gate of Paradise weren’t fiends from hell, but the more horrifying foreshadowings of what so many of their descendants would become. God help them, and us too, their brothers and sisters! Let me add that, forlorn, ragged, careworn, hopeless, dirty, haggard, and hungry as they were, the most heart-wrenching thing of all was witnessing the kind of patience with which they accepted their fate, as if they had been born into the world for that and nothing else. Even the little children displayed this trait as perfectly as their grandmothers.

The children, in truth, were the ill-omened blossoms from which another harvest of precisely such dark fruitage as I saw ripened around me was to be produced. Of course you would imagine these to be lumps of crude iniquity, tiny vessels as full as they could hold of naughtiness; nor can I say a great deal to the contrary. Small proof of parental discipline could I discern, save when a mother (drunken, I sincerely hope) snatched her own imp out of a group of pale, half-naked, humor-eaten abortions that were playing and squabbling together in the mud, turned up its tatters, brought down her heavy hand on its poor little tenderest part, and let it go again with a shake. If the child knew what the punishment was for, it was wiser than I pretend to be. It yelled, and went back to its playmates in the mud. Yet let me bear testimony to what was beautiful, and more touching than anything that I ever witnessed in the intercourse of happier children. I allude to the superintendence which some of these small people (too small, one would think, to be sent into the street alone, had there been any other nursery for them) exercised over still smaller ones. Whence they derived such a sense of duty, unless immediately from God, I cannot tell; but it was wonderful to observe the expression of responsibility in their deportment, the anxious fidelity with which they discharged their unfit office, the tender patience with which they linked their less pliable impulses to the wayward footsteps of an infant, and let it guide them whithersoever it liked. In the hollow-cheeked, large-eyed girl of ten, whom I saw giving a cheerless oversight to her baby-brother, I did not so much marvel at it. She had merely come a little earlier than usual to the perception of what was to be her business in life. But I admired the sickly-looking little boy, who did violence to his boyish nature by making himself the servant of his little sister,—she too small to walk, and he too small to take her in his arms,—and therefore working a kind of miracle to transport her from one dirt-heap to another. Beholding such works of love and duty, I took heart again, and deemed it not so impossible, after all, for these neglected children to find a path through the squalor and evil of their circumstances up to the gate of heaven. Perhaps there was this latent good in all of them, though generally they looked brutish, and dull even in their sports; there was little mirth among them, nor even a fully awakened spirit of blackguardism. Yet sometimes, again, I saw, with surprise and a sense as if I had been asleep and dreaming, the bright, intelligent, merry face of a child whose dark eyes gleamed with vivacious expression through the dirt that incrusted its skin, like sunshine struggling through a very dusty window-pane.

The children, honestly, were the unfortunate blossoms that would produce another crop of the same dark results I saw all around me. You might think these kids were just bundles of raw mischief, little containers overflowing with naughtiness; and I can't argue much against that. I could barely see any evidence of parental discipline, except when a mother (who I genuinely hope was drunk) grabbed her own brat out of a group of pale, half-naked, worn-out kids who were playing and fighting in the mud, yanked it up by its rags, smacked it hard on its tender spot, and then let it go again with a shake. If the kid knew what the punishment was for, it was definitely smarter than I can pretend to be. It screamed and returned to its muddy playmates. But let me also mention something beautiful and touching, more than anything I ever saw among happier children. I’m talking about how some of these little ones (who seemed too small to be left alone on the streets if there were any proper place for them) cared for even smaller kids. I can’t say where they got such a sense of responsibility from, unless it came straight from God, but it was amazing to see how serious they were in their roles, the anxious dedication with which they carried out their unsuitable duties, the gentle patience they used to guide the unsteady steps of a toddler, allowing it to lead them wherever it wanted. In the hollow-cheeked, big-eyed ten-year-old girl I saw keeping an eye on her baby brother, I didn’t find it surprising. She had just figured out a bit earlier what her role in life would be. But I was impressed by the sickly little boy, who went against his boyish instincts to take care of his little sister—she was too small to walk, and he was too small to carry her—so he performed a sort of miracle just to move her from one pile of dirt to another. Seeing such acts of love and duty, I felt hopeful again and thought that it might not be so impossible for these neglected kids to find a way out of the filth and hardship of their lives toward the gates of heaven. Maybe they all had this hidden goodness inside them, even though they usually appeared brutish and dull, even in their play; there wasn’t much joy among them, not even a fully awakened spirit of mischief. Yet sometimes, to my surprise, I would catch sight of a bright, intelligent, happy face of a child whose dark eyes sparkled with lively expression through the dirt that caked its skin, like sunlight trying to shine through a very dusty windowpane.

In these streets the belted and blue-coated policeman appears seldom in comparison with the frequency of his occurrence in more reputable thoroughfares. I used to think that the inhabitants would have ample time to murder one another, or any stranger, like myself, who might violate the filthy sanctities of the place; before the law could bring up its lumbering assistance. Nevertheless, there is a supervision; nor does the watchfulness of authority permit the populace to be tempted to any outbreak. Once, in a time of dearth I noticed a ballad-singer going through the street hoarsely chanting some discordant strain in a provincial dialect, of which I could only make out that it addressed the sensibilities of the auditors on the score of starvation; but by his side stalked the policeman, offering no interference, but watchful to hear what this rough minstrel said or sang, and silence him, if his effusion threatened to prove too soul-stirring. In my judgment, however, there is little or no danger of that kind: they starve patiently, sicken patiently, die patiently, not through resignation, but a diseased flaccidity of hope. If ever they should do mischief to those above them, it will probably be by the communication of some destructive pestilence; for, so the medical men affirm, they suffer all the ordinary diseases with a degree of virulence elsewhere unknown, and keep among themselves traditionary plagues that have long ceased to afflict more fortunate societies. Charity herself gathers her robe about her to avoid their contact. It would be a dire revenge, indeed, if they were to prove their claims to be reckoned of one blood and nature with the noblest and wealthiest by compelling them to inhale death through the diffusion of their own poverty-poisoned atmosphere.

In these streets, the uniformed and blue-coated policeman shows up rarely compared to his frequent presence in more respectable areas. I used to think the residents would have plenty of time to kill each other or any outsider, like me, who dared to break the filthy sanctity of the place; before the law could come to help. However, there is oversight; and the watchfulness of authority keeps the locals from being tempted to any violent outburst. Once, during a time of scarcity, I saw a street singer hoarsely belting out some jarring tune in a regional dialect, of which I could only gather that it appealed to the listeners about their hunger; but beside him walked the policeman, offering no interruption, just keeping an ear out for what this rough performer said or sang, ready to hush him if his tune threatened to be too stirring. In my opinion, though, there’s little to worry about: they suffer through starvation, illness, and death with patience, not out of acceptance, but from a sickly numbness of hope. If they ever do harm to those above them, it will likely be by spreading some deadly disease; since, as medical professionals say, they experience all the common ailments at a level of intensity unknown elsewhere, and carry with them traditional plagues that have long stopped affecting more fortunate societies. Even charity pulls her cloak tight around her to avoid their touch. It would indeed be a terrible revenge if they were to prove that they share blood and nature with the noblest and richest by forcing them to breathe in death through the spread of their own poverty-ridden air.

A true Englishman is a kind man at heart, but has an unconquerable dislike to poverty and beggary. Beggars have heretofore been so strange to an American that he is apt to become their prey, being recognized through his national peculiarities, and beset by them in the streets. The English smile at him, and say that there are ample public arrangements for every pauper's possible need, that street-charity promotes idleness and vice, and that yonder personification of misery on the pavement will lay up a good day's profit, besides supping more luxuriously than the dupe who gives him a shilling. By and by the stranger adopts their theory and begins to practise upon it, much to his own temporary freedom from annoyance, but not entirely without moral detriment or sometimes a too late contrition. Years afterwards, it may be, his memory is still haunted by some vindictive wretch whose cheeks were pale and hunger-pinched, whose rags fluttered in the east-wind, whose right arm was paralyzed and his left leg shrivelled into a mere nerveless stick, but whom he passed by remorselessly because an Englishman chose to say that the fellow's misery looked too perfect, was too artistically got up, to be genuine. Even allowing this to be true (as, a hundred chances to one, it was), it would still have been a clear case of economy to buy him off with a little loose silver, so that his lamentable figure should not limp at the heels of your conscience all over the world. To own the truth, I provided myself with several such imaginary persecutors in England, and recruited their number with at least one sickly-looking wretch whose acquaintance I first made at Assisi, in Italy, and, taking a dislike to something sinister in his aspect, permitted him to beg early and late, and all day long, without getting a single baiocco. At my latest glimpse of him, the villain avenged himself, not by a volley of horrible curses, as any other Italian beggar would, but by taking an expression so grief-stricken, want-wrung, hopeless, and withal resigned, that I could paint his lifelike portrait at this moment. Were I to go over the same ground again, I would listen to no man's theories, but buy the little luxury of beneficence at a cheap rate, instead of doing myself a moral mischief by exuding a stony incrustation over whatever natural sensibility I might possess.

A true Englishman is kind at heart but has an unyielding dislike for poverty and begging. Beggars have seemed so foreign to an American that they're likely to fall victim to them, easily identified by their national quirks and approached in the streets. The English may laugh at him, claiming that there are plenty of public resources for every pauper's needs, that street charity encourages laziness and vice, and that the miserable figure sitting on the pavement will earn more in a day than the person who gives him a shilling will make in their honest work. Eventually, the stranger adopts their mindset and starts to act accordingly, enjoying a temporary relief from annoyance, though not without some moral backlash or the regret that comes too late. Years later, he may still be haunted by a vengeful wretch with pale, hungry cheeks, tattered rags fluttering in the east wind, a paralyzed right arm, and a left leg reduced to a mere useless stick, someone he passed by without a second thought because an Englishman insisted that the person's misery seemed too perfect, too artistically presented, to be real. Even if that were true (which, odds are, it was), it would still have been a small price to pay to let him go with a little loose change, to prevent that pitiful figure from trailing behind his conscience wherever he went. To be honest, I found myself with several such imaginary tormentors in England, adding to their numbers with at least one sickly beggar I first encountered in Assisi, Italy. I took a dislike to something unsettling about his appearance and let him beg day in and day out without giving him a single baiocco. The last time I saw him, he didn’t lash out with curses like most Italian beggars would, but wore an expression so filled with grief, need, hopelessness, and resignation that I could sketch his portrait from memory right now. If I were to revisit that same place, I wouldn’t listen to anyone's theories, but I would buy a little kindness at a low cost instead of damaging my own morals by hardening whatever natural empathy I might have.

On the other hand, there were some mendicants whose utmost efforts I even now felicitate myself on having withstood. Such was a phenomenon abridged of his lower half, who beset me for two or three years together, and, in spite of his deficiency of locomotive members, had some supernatural method of transporting himself (simultaneously, I believe) to all quarters of the city. He wore a sailor's jacket (possibly, because skirts would have been a superfluity to his figure), and had a remarkably broad-shouldered and muscular frame, surmounted by a large, fresh-colored face, which was full of power and intelligence. His dress and linen were the perfection of neatness. Once a day, at least, wherever I went, I suddenly became aware of this trunk of a man on the path before me, resting on his base, and looking as if he had just sprouted out of the pavement, and would sink into it again and reappear at some other spot the instant you left him behind. The expression of his eye was perfectly respectful, but terribly fixed, holding your own as by fascination, never once winking, never wavering from its point-blank gaze right into your face, till you were completely beyond the range of his battery of one immense rifled cannon. This was his mode of soliciting alms; and he reminded me of the old beggar who appealed so touchingly to the charitable sympathies of Gil Blas, taking aim at him from the roadside with a long-barrelled musket. The intentness and directness of his silent appeal, his close and unrelenting attack upon your individuality, respectful as it seemed, was the very flower of insolence; or, if you give it a possibly truer interpretation, it was the tyrannical effort of a man endowed with great natural force of character to constrain your reluctant will to his purpose. Apparently, he had staked his salvation upon the ultimate success of a daily struggle between himself and me, the triumph of which would compel me to become a tributary to the hat that lay on the pavement beside him. Man or fiend, however, there was a stubbornness in his intended victim which this massive fragment of a mighty personality had not altogether reckoned upon, and by its aid I was enabled to pass him at my customary pace hundreds of times over, quietly meeting his terribly respectful eye, and allowing him the fair chance which I felt to be his due, to subjugate me, if he really had the strength for it. He never succeeded, but, on the other hand, never gave up the contest; and should I ever walk those streets again, I am certain that the truncated tyrant will sprout up through the pavement and look me fixedly in the eye, and perhaps get the victory.

On the other hand, there were some beggars whose utmost efforts I still congratulate myself on having resisted. One such individual was a man without his lower half who bothered me for two or three years. Despite his inability to walk, he had some sort of supernatural way of moving himself around the city, seemingly all at once. He wore a sailor's jacket (probably because pants would have been unnecessary for his figure) and had a broad-shouldered, muscular build, topped with a large, healthy-looking face filled with strength and intelligence. His clothes and appearance were impeccably tidy. At least once a day, no matter where I went, I would suddenly find this man in front of me, as if he had just emerged from the pavement, ready to sink back into it and reappear somewhere else the moment I passed. His eyes were intensely focused, respectfully fixed on mine, holding my gaze like a spell, never blinking, never straying from staring directly at my face, until I was completely out of his sight. This was his way of asking for money, and he reminded me of the old beggar who touched Gil Blas's heart, aiming at him from the side of the road with a long musket. His intense and direct silent request, his relentless focus on me, though seemingly respectful, was the very essence of insolence; or, if we look at it another way, it was the overpowering effort of a strong-willed man trying to bend my unwillingness to his will. It seemed he had placed his hopes on the eventual outcome of our daily struggle, where success would force me to contribute to the hat sitting on the ground beside him. Man or monster, however, there was a stubbornness in me that this huge figure had not fully anticipated, and with that, I managed to pass him at my usual pace hundreds of times, calmly meeting his intensely respectful gaze and giving him the fair chance I felt he deserved to conquer me if he truly had the power. He never did succeed, but he also never gave up. If I were to walk those streets again, I’m sure that the truncated tyrant would rise from the pavement and stare me straight in the eye, and perhaps claim victory.

I should think all the more highly of myself, if I had shown equal heroism in resisting another class of beggarly depredators, who assailed me on my weaker side and won an easy spoil. Such was the sanctimonious clergyman, with his white cravat, who visited me with a subscription-paper, which he himself had drawn up, in a case of heart-rending distress;—the respectable and ruined tradesman, going from door to door, shy and silent in his own person, but accompanied by a sympathizing friend, who bore testimony to his integrity, and stated the unavoidable misfortunes that had crushed him down;—or the delicate and prettily dressed lady, who had been bred in affluence, but was suddenly thrown upon the perilous charities of the world by the death of an indulgent, but secretly insolvent father, or the commercial catastrophe and simultaneous suicide of the best of husbands; or the gifted, but unsuccessful author, appealing to my fraternal sympathies, generously rejoicing in some small prosperities which he was kind enough to term my own triumphs in the field of letters, and claiming to have largely contributed to them by his unbought notices in the public journals. England is full of such people, and a hundred other varieties of peripatetic tricksters, higher than these, and lower, who act their parts tolerably well, but seldom with an absolutely illusive effect. I knew at once, raw Yankee as I was, that they were humbugs, almost without an exception,—rats that nibble at the honest bread and cheese of the community, and grow fat by their petty pilferings, yet often gave them what they asked, and privately owned myself a simpleton. There is a decorum which restrains you (unless you happen to be a police-constable) from breaking through a crust of plausible respectability, even when you are certain that there is a knave beneath it.

I should think more highly of myself if I had shown the same courage in resisting another group of lowlifes, who attacked me when I was vulnerable and got away with an easy prize. These included the holier-than-thou clergyman, with his white cravat, who came to me with a donation request he had created himself, in a situation of heartbreaking distress; the respectable but ruined tradesman, going door to door, shy and quiet on his own but accompanied by a supportive friend, who vouched for his honesty and described the unavoidable misfortunes that had brought him down; or the delicate, nicely dressed lady, raised in wealth but suddenly forced to rely on the precarious kindness of strangers after the death of a pampering but secretly bankrupt father, or the business disaster and simultaneous suicide of the best of husbands; or the talented but struggling author, appealing to my brotherly instincts, happily claiming some little successes that he generously referred to as my own victories in literature, insisting that he had greatly contributed to them through his unpaid reviews in the newspapers. England is filled with such people, along with countless other types of wandering con artists, both higher and lower, who play their roles reasonably well but rarely with a completely convincing effect. I knew right away, as inexperienced as I was, that they were frauds, almost without exception—parasites that eat away at the honest livelihood of the community and grow fat from their petty thefts, yet I often gave them what they asked for and privately admitted to myself that I was a fool. There is a decorum that holds you back (unless you're a police officer) from breaking through a layer of seemingly respectable behavior, even when you're sure there's a scoundrel underneath it.

After making myself as familiar as I decently could with the poor streets, I became curious to see what kind of a home was provided for the inhabitants at the public expense, fearing that it must needs be a most comfortless one, or else their choice (if choice it were) of so miserable a life outside was truly difficult to account for. Accordingly, I visited a great almshouse, and was glad to observe how unexceptionably all the parts of the establishment were carried on, and what an orderly life, full-fed, sufficiently reposeful, and undisturbed by the arbitrary exercise of authority, seemed to be led there. Possibly, indeed, it was that very orderliness, and the cruel necessity of being neat and clean, and even the comfort resulting from these and other Christian-like restraints and regulations, that constituted the principal grievance on the part of the poor, shiftless inmates, accustomed to a lifelong luxury of dirt and harum-scarumness. The wild life of the streets has perhaps as unforgetable a charm, to those who have once thoroughly imbibed it, as the life of the forest or the prairie. But I conceive rather that there must be insuperable difficulties, for the majority of the poor, in the way of getting admittance to the almshouse, than that a merely aesthetic preference for the street would incline the pauper-class to fare scantily and precariously, and expose their raggedness to the rain and snow, when such a hospitable door stood wide open for their entrance. It might be that the roughest and darkest side of the matter was not shown me, there being persons of eminent station and of both sexes in the party which I accompanied; and, of course, a properly trained public functionary would have deemed it a monstrous rudeness, as well as a great shame, to exhibit anything to people of rank that might too painfully shock their sensibilities.

After getting as familiar as I could with the poor streets, I became curious about the kind of home provided for the residents at public expense, worried that it had to be an incredibly uncomfortable place; otherwise, their choice (if it was a choice) to live such a miserable life outside was hard to understand. So, I visited a large almshouse and was pleased to see how well everything was managed and how orderly the residents’ lives were, with ample food, enough rest, and no random authority imposing on them. Perhaps it was that orderliness, the harsh need to be neat and clean, and the comfort from these and other Christian-like rules that made the residents resentful, as they were used to a lifetime of dirt and chaos. The wild life of the streets probably has an unforgettable charm for those who have fully experienced it, like the life of the forest or prairie. However, I think there are significant obstacles for most poor people in gaining entry to the almshouse, rather than a simple aesthetic preference for the streets that leads the impoverished to live poorly and vulnerably, braving the rain and snow when such a welcoming door was open for them. It’s possible that the harshest and darkest realities were kept from me since I was with people of high status. Naturally, a well-trained public official would consider it exceptionally rude and downright shameful to show anything that might deeply disturb those of higher rank.

The women's ward was the portion of the establishment which we especially examined. It could not be questioned that they were treated with kindness as well as care. No doubt, as has been already suggested, some of them felt the irksomeness of submission to general rules of orderly behavior, after being accustomed to that perfect freedom from the minor proprieties, at least, which is one of the compensations of absolutely hopeless poverty, or of any circumstances that set us fairly below the decencies of life. I asked the governor of the house whether he met with any difficulty in keeping peace and order among his inmates; and he informed me that his troubles among the women were incomparably greater than with the men. They were freakish, and apt to be quarrelsome, inclined to plague and pester one another in ways that it was impossible to lay hold of, and to thwart his own authority by the like intangible methods. He said this with the utmost good-nature, and quite won my regard by so placidly resigning himself to the inevitable necessity of letting the women throw dust into his eyes. They certainly looked peaceable and sisterly enough, as I saw them, though still it might be faintly perceptible that some of them were consciously playing their parts before the governor and his distinguished visitors.

The women’s ward was the part of the facility that we specifically examined. It was clear that they were treated with kindness and care. No doubt, as previously mentioned, some of them felt frustrated by having to follow the general rules of proper behavior, especially after experiencing the complete lack of constraints that comes from being in utterly hopeless poverty or situations that place us below the basic decencies of life. I asked the governor of the house if he faced any challenges in maintaining peace and order among his residents; he told me that his difficulties with the women were far greater than with the men. They were unpredictable and often quarrelsome, tending to annoy each other in ways that were hard to address, and to undermine his authority using similar subtle tactics. He mentioned this with complete good humor and won my respect by calmly accepting the unavoidable reality of letting the women outsmart him. They certainly appeared peaceful and sisterly enough when I saw them, though it was still somewhat evident that some of them were consciously putting on a show for the governor and his esteemed guests.

This governor seemed to me a man thoroughly fit for his position. An American, in an office of similar responsibility, would doubtless be a much superior person, better educated, possessing a far wider range of thought, more naturally acute, with a quicker tact of external observation and a readier faculty of dealing with difficult cases. The women would not succeed in throwing half so much dust into his eyes. Moreover, his black coat, and thin, sallow visage, would make him look like a scholar, and his manners would indefinitely approximate to those of a gentleman. But I cannot help questioning, whether, on the whole, these higher endowments would produce decidedly better results. The Englishman was thoroughly plebeian both in aspect and behavior, a bluff, ruddy-faced, hearty, kindly, yeoman-like personage, with no refinement whatever, nor any superfluous sensibility, but gifted with a native wholesomeness of character which must have been a very beneficial element in the atmosphere of the almshouse. He spoke to his pauper family in loud, good-humored, cheerful tones, and treated them with a healthy freedom that probably caused the forlorn wretches to feel as if they were free and healthy likewise. If he had understood them a little better, he would not have treated them half so wisely. We are apt to make sickly people more morbid, and unfortunate people more miserable, by endeavoring to adapt our deportment to their especial and individual needs. They eagerly accept our well-meant efforts; but it is like returning their own sick breath back upon themselves, to be breathed over and over again, intensifying the inward mischief at every repetition. The sympathy that would really do them good is of a kind that recognizes their sound and healthy parts, and ignores the part affected by disease, which will thrive under the eye of a too close observer like a poisonous weed in the sunshine. My good friend the governor had no tendencies in the latter direction, and abundance of them in the former, and was consequently as wholesome and invigorating as the west-wind with a little spice of the north in it, brightening the dreary visages that encountered us as if he had carried a sunbeam in his hand. He expressed himself by his whole being and personality, and by works more than words, and had the not unusual English merit of knowing what to do much better than how to talk about it.

This governor struck me as someone who was completely suited for his role. An American in a similar position would likely be a much more capable person, better educated, with a broader perspective, more naturally sharp, quicker in external observations, and more proficient in handling tough situations. The women wouldn’t be able to distract him as easily. Plus, his black coat and thin, pale face made him look scholarly, and his manners were very much like those of a gentleman. However, I can't help but wonder if, overall, these superior qualities would lead to better outcomes. The Englishman was quite ordinary in both appearance and behavior—a hearty, ruddy-faced, friendly, down-to-earth guy with no refinement or excessive sensitivity, yet he had a natural wholesomeness that was likely very positive for the atmosphere of the almshouse. He spoke to his impoverished family in loud, cheerful, friendly tones and treated them with a healthy openness that probably helped the unfortunate individuals feel as if they were free and healthy too. If he had understood them a bit better, he wouldn’t have dealt with them as wisely. We tend to make sick people feel worse and unfortunate people feel even more miserable by trying to adapt our behavior to their particular needs. They gladly accept our well-intentioned attempts; but it’s like returning their own sick breath back to them, causing their inner troubles to intensify with every cycle. The type of sympathy that would genuinely help them is one that acknowledges their healthy sides and overlooks the parts affected by illness, which will flourish under the scrutiny of an overly attentive observer like a harmful weed in the sunlight. My good friend the governor had no inclinations toward the latter and plenty toward the former, making him as refreshing and invigorating as a west wind with a hint of northern chill, brightening the gloomy faces we encountered as if he carried a sunbeam in his hand. He expressed himself through his entire being and actions rather than words, and he had the typical English knack for knowing what to do much better than how to talk about it.

The women, I imagine, must have felt one imperfection in their state, however comfortable otherwise. They were forbidden, or, at all events, lacked the means, to follow out their natural instinct of adorning themselves; all were dressed in one homely uniform of blue-checked gowns, with such caps upon their heads as English servants wear. Generally, too, they had one dowdy English aspect, and a vulgar type of features so nearly alike that they seemed literally to constitute a sisterhood. We have few of these absolutely unilluminated faces among our native American population, individuals of whom must be singularly unfortunate, if, mixing as we do, no drop of gentle blood has contributed to refine the turbid element, no gleam of hereditary intelligence has lighted up the stolid eyes, which their forefathers brought, from the Old Country. Even in this English almshouse, however, there was at least one person who claimed to be intimately connected with rank and wealth. The governor, after suggesting that this person would probably be gratified by our visit, ushered us into a small parlor, which was furnished a little more like a room in a private dwelling than others that we entered, and had a row of religious books and fashionable novels on the mantel-piece. An old lady sat at a bright coal-fire, reading a romance, and rose to receive us with a certain pomp of manner and elaborate display of ceremonious courtesy, which, in spite of myself, made me inwardly question the genuineness of her aristocratic pretensions. But, at any rate, she looked like a respectable old soul, and was evidently gladdened to the very core of her frost-bitten heart by the awful punctiliousness with which she responded to her gracious and hospitable, though unfamiliar welcome. After a little polite conversation, we retired; and the governor, with a lowered voice and an air of deference, told us that she had been a lady of quality, and had ridden in her own equipage, not many years before, and now lived in continual expectation that some of her rich relatives would drive up in their carriages to take her away. Meanwhile, he added, she was treated with great respect by her fellow-paupers. I could not help thinking, from a few criticisable peculiarities in her talk and manner, that there might have been a mistake on the governor's part, and perhaps a venial exaggeration on the old lady's, concerning her former position in society; but what struck me was the forcible instance of that most prevalent of English vanities, the pretension to aristocratic connection, on one side, and the submission and reverence with which it was accepted by the governor and his household, on the other. Among ourselves, I think, when wealth and eminent position have taken their departure, they seldom leave a pallid ghost behind them,—or, if it sometimes stalks abroad, few recognize it.

The women, I imagine, must have sensed a flaw in their situation, no matter how comfortable otherwise. They were either prohibited or simply didn’t have the means to follow their natural instinct to adorn themselves; all of them wore the same plain blue-checked gowns and caps like those worn by English servants. Generally, they had a drab English appearance and a common look, with features so similar that they seemed like a sisterhood. We don’t have many of these completely unrefined faces among our native American population; those individuals must be quite unfortunate if, considering how mixed we are, no trace of gentle lineage has refined the muddled heritage, no spark of inherited intelligence has brightened the dull eyes that their ancestors brought from the Old Country. Even in this English almshouse, however, there was at least one person who claimed to be closely linked to nobility and wealth. The governor, after suggesting that this person would likely appreciate our visit, led us into a small parlor, which was furnished a bit more like a room in a private home than the others we had entered and featured a row of religious books and trendy novels on the mantel. An elderly woman sat by a bright coal fire reading a romance and stood up to greet us with an air of grandeur and elaborate courtesy, which, despite myself, made me question the authenticity of her claims to aristocracy. Still, she seemed like a respectable old soul and was clearly warmed to her frostbitten heart by the formal kindness of our somewhat awkward welcome. After a bit of polite conversation, we left, and the governor, lowering his voice and showing respect, told us that she had once been a person of high status and had ridden in her own carriage not long ago, and now awaited the day when her wealthy relatives would come to pick her up. In the meantime, he added, she was treated with great respect by her fellow residents. I couldn’t help but think, based on a few questionable quirks in her speech and manner, that the governor might have been mistaken and perhaps the old lady had exaggerated her former societal status; but what caught my attention was the strong example of that common English vanity—the claim to aristocratic connections on one side, and the deference and respect with which it was received by the governor and his household on the other. Among us, I believe, when wealth and high status are gone, they rarely leave a faint trace behind them—and if they do sometimes show up, few recognize them.

We went into several other rooms, at the doors of which, pausing on the outside, we could hear the volubility, and sometimes the wrangling, of the female inhabitants within, but invariably found silence and peace, when we stepped over the threshold. The women were grouped together in their sitting-rooms, sometimes three or four, sometimes a larger number, classified by their spontaneous affinities, I suppose, and all busied, so far as I can remember, with the one occupation of knitting coarse yarn stockings. Hardly any of them, I am sorry to say, had a brisk or cheerful air, though it often stirred them up to a momentary vivacity to be accosted by the governor, and they seemed to like being noticed, however slightly, by the visitors. The happiest person whom I saw there (and, running hastily through my experiences, I hardly recollect to have seen a happier one in my life, if you take a careless flow of spirits as happiness) was an old woman that lay in bed among ten or twelve heavy-looking females, who plied their knitting-work round about her. She laughed, when we entered, and immediately began to talk to us, in a thin, little, spirited quaver, claiming to be more than a century old; and the governor (in whatever way he happened to be cognizant of the fact) confirmed her age to be a hundred and four. Her jauntiness and cackling merriment were really wonderful. It was as if she had got through with all her actual business in life two or three generations ago, and now, freed from every responsibility for herself or others, had only to keep up a mirthful state of mind till the short time, or long time (and, happy as she was, she appeared not to care whether it were long or short), before Death, who had misplaced her name in his list, might remember to take her away. She had gone quite round the circle of human existence, and come back to the play-ground again. And so she had grown to be a kind of miraculous old pet, the plaything of people seventy or eighty years younger than herself, who talked and laughed with her as if she were a child, finding great delight in her wayward and strangely playful responses, into some of which she cunningly conveyed a gibe that caused their ears to tingle a little. She had done getting out of bed in this world, and lay there to be waited upon like a queen or a baby.

We entered several other rooms, pausing outside the doors where we could hear the chatter and sometimes the arguments of the women inside, but we always found silence and tranquility when we stepped across the threshold. The women were gathered in their sitting rooms, sometimes three or four, sometimes more, grouped by their natural connections, I suppose, and all busy, as far as I remember, knitting thick yarn stockings. Unfortunately, most of them didn’t appear very lively or cheerful, though they often perked up for a moment when the governor came by, and they seemed to appreciate any attention from the visitors, even if it was brief. The happiest person I saw there (and honestly, I can’t recall meeting anyone happier in my life, if you consider a relaxed spirit the same as happiness) was an old woman lying in bed among ten or twelve heavier-looking women, who were busy knitting around her. She laughed when we came in and immediately started talking to us in a thin, spirited voice, claiming to be over a hundred years old; the governor confirmed her age as one hundred and four. Her cheerfulness and giggling were truly impressive. It was as if she had completed all her real duties in life two or three generations ago and was now free from any responsibility for herself or others, just maintaining a joyful mindset until the time—whether soon or far off (and she seemed not to mind which)—when Death, who had misplaced her name, would finally come to take her away. She had gone through the full circle of human existence and returned to childhood. Thus, she had become a kind of miraculous old pet, a plaything for people seventy or eighty years younger than her, who talked and laughed with her as if she were a child, finding great joy in her whimsical and oddly playful replies, some of which cleverly included a playful jab that made their ears tingle a little. She had stopped getting out of bed in this world and lay there to be cared for like a queen or a baby.

In the same room sat a pauper who had once been an actress of considerable repute, but was compelled to give up her profession by a softening of the brain. The disease seemed to have stolen the continuity out of her life, and disturbed an healthy relationship between the thoughts within her and the world without. On our first entrance, she looked cheerfully at us, and showed herself ready to engage in conversation; but suddenly, while we were talking with the century-old crone, the poor actress began to weep, contorting her face with extravagant stage-grimaces, and wringing her hands for some inscrutable sorrow. It might have been a reminiscence of actual calamity in her past life, or, quite as probably, it was but a dramatic woe, beneath which she had staggered and shrieked and wrung her hands with hundreds of repetitions in the sight of crowded theatres, and been as often comforted by thunders of applause. But my idea of the mystery was, that she had a sense of wrong in seeing the aged woman (whose empty vivacity was like the rattling of dry peas in a bladder) chosen as the central object of interest to the visitors, while she herself, who had agitated thousands of hearts with a breath, sat starving for the admiration that was her natural food. I appeal to the whole society of artists of the Beautiful and the Imaginative,—poets, romancers, painters, sculptors, actors,— whether or no this is a grief that may be felt even amid the torpor of a dissolving brain!

In the same room sat a beggar who had once been a well-known actress but had to give up her career due to a decline in mental health. The illness seemed to have disrupted the flow of her life and affected the connection between her thoughts and the outside world. When we first walked in, she looked at us cheerfully and seemed ready to chat; but suddenly, while we were speaking with the elderly woman, the poor actress began to cry, twisting her face into exaggerated theatrical expressions and wringing her hands in response to some deep sorrow. It could have been a memory of real hardship from her past, or just as likely, it was a dramatic sadness she had displayed many times before in front of packed audiences, often comforted by loud applause. But my sense of the situation was that she felt a sense of injustice seeing the old woman (whose empty enthusiasm was like the sound of dry peas rattling in a bag) chosen as the main focus of attention for visitors, while she, who had once moved countless hearts with a single breath, sat there longing for the admiration that was her true nourishment. I ask all artists of beauty and imagination—poets, novelists, painters, sculptors, actors—whether this is a pain that can be felt even amidst the fading of a once-vibrant mind!

We looked into a good many sleeping-chambers, where were rows of beds, mostly calculated for two occupants, and provided with sheets and pillow-cases that resembled sackcloth. It appeared to me that the sense of beauty was insufficiently regarded in all the arrangements of the almshouse; a little cheap luxury for the eye, at least, might do the poor folks a substantial good. But, at all events, there was the beauty of perfect neatness and orderliness, which, being heretofore known to few of them, was perhaps as much as they could well digest in the remnant of their lives. We were invited into the laundry, where a great washing and drying were in process, the whole atmosphere being hot and vaporous with the steam of wet garments and bedclothes. This atmosphere was the pauper-life of the past week or fortnight resolved into a gaseous state, and breathing it, however fastidiously, we were forced to inhale the strange element into our inmost being. Had the Queen been there, I know not how she could have escaped the necessity. What an intimate brotherhood is this in which we dwell, do what we may to put an artificial remoteness between the high creature and the low one! A poor man's breath, borne on the vehicle of tobacco-smoke, floats into a palace-window and reaches the nostrils of a monarch. It is but an example, obvious to the sense, of the innumerable and secret channels by which, at every moment of our lives, the flow and reflux of a common humanity pervade us all. How superficial are the niceties of such as pretend to keep aloof! Let the whole world be cleansed, or not a man or woman of us all can be clean.

We checked out a lot of bedrooms, where there were rows of beds, mostly meant for two people, and covered with sheets and pillowcases that looked like burlap. It seemed to me that the sense of beauty was hardly considered in the almshouse's setup; a little cheap luxury for the eyes could really benefit the residents. But, at the very least, there was the beauty of perfect cleanliness and order, which many of them had rarely experienced, and perhaps that was as much as they could handle in the rest of their lives. We were invited into the laundry, where a big washing and drying operation was underway, filling the air with heat and steam from damp clothes and linens. This atmosphere was the essence of the pauper life from the past week or two turned into vapor, and even if we tried to be fastidious about it, we couldn’t help but inhale this strange element deeply. If the Queen had been there, I really don't know how she could have avoided it. What an intimate connection we all share, no matter how much we might try to create artificial distance between the upper class and the lower! The breath of a poor man, carried on tobacco smoke, can waft into a palace window and reach the nose of a monarch. It’s just one clear example of the countless hidden ways that, at every moment in our lives, the ebb and flow of our shared humanity surrounds us all. How shallow are the pretenses of those who think they can remain separate! If the entire world isn't cleansed, then none of us can truly be clean.

By and by we came to the ward where the children were kept, on entering which, we saw, in the first place, several unlovely and unwholesome little people lazily playing together in a court-yard. And here a singular incommodity befell one member of our party. Among the children was a wretched, pale, half-torpid little thing (about six years old, perhaps,—but I know not whether a girl or a boy), with a humor in its eyes and face, which the governor said was the scurvy, and which appeared to bedim its powers of vision, so that it toddled about gropingly, as if in quest of it did not precisely know what. This child—this sickly, wretched, humor-eaten infant, the offspring of unspeakable sin and sorrow, whom it must have required several generations of guilty progenitors to render so pitiable an object as we beheld it—immediately took an unaccountable fancy to the gentleman just hinted at. It prowled about him like a pet kitten, rubbing against his legs, following everywhere at his heels, pulling at his coat-tails, and, at last, exerting all the speed that its poor limbs were capable of, got directly before him and held forth its arms, mutely insisting on being taken up. It said not a word, being perhaps under-witted and incapable of prattle. But it smiled up in his face,—a sort of woful gleam was that smile, through the sickly blotches that covered its features,—and found means to express such a perfect confidence that it was going to be fondled and made much of, that there was no possibility in a human heart of balking its expectation. It was as if God had promised the poor child this favor on behalf of that individual, and he was bound to fulfil the contract, or else no longer call himself a man among men. Nevertheless, it could be no easy thing for him to do, he being a person burdened with more than an Englishman's customary reserve, shy of actual contact with human beings, afflicted with a peculiar distaste for whatever was ugly, and, furthermore, accustomed to that habit of observation from an insulated stand-point which is said (but, I hope, erroneously) to have the tendency of putting ice into the blood.

By and by, we arrived at the ward where the children were kept. Upon entering, we first saw several unattractive and unhealthy little kids lazily playing together in a courtyard. There, a strange issue arose for one member of our group. Among the children was a miserable, pale, half-dazed little one (about six years old, maybe—but I couldn’t tell if it was a girl or a boy), with a condition in its eyes and face that the governor said was scurvy, which seemed to cloud its vision, making it wander around awkwardly as if searching for something it couldn’t quite identify. This child—this sickly, miserable, humor-afflicted infant, the product of unimaginable sin and sorrow, likely needing several generations of guilty ancestors to become such a pitiable sight as we saw—immediately took an inexplicable liking to the gentleman mentioned earlier. It moved around him like a pet kitten, nuzzling against his legs, following him closely, tugging at his coat-tails, and finally, mustering all the strength its frail limbs could manage, got directly in front of him and stretched out its arms, silently insisting on being picked up. It didn’t say a word, perhaps too simple-minded to speak. But it smiled up at him—a kind of sorrowful glimmer was in that smile, despite the sickly spots marring its features—and managed to convey such perfect trust that it expected to be held and cherished, making it impossible for any human heart to deny its hope. It felt as if God had promised the poor child this kindness through that individual, and he was obligated to fulfill that promise or no longer call himself a man among men. Still, it wasn’t an easy task for him, as he was a person weighed down by more than the typical Englishman’s reserve, shy of actual contact with others, burdened with a particular aversion to anything ugly, and, moreover, accustomed to observing from a detached viewpoint, which is said (but I hope mistakenly) to put ice in one’s blood.

So I watched the struggle in his mind with a good deal of interest, and am seriously of opinion that he did an heroic act, and effected more than he dreamed of towards his final salvation, when he took up the loathsome child and caressed it as tenderly as if he had been its father. To be sure, we all smiled at him, at the time, but doubtless would have acted pretty much the same in a similar stress of circumstances. The child, at any rate, appeared to be satisfied with his behavior; for when he had held it a considerable time, and set it down, it still favored him with its company, keeping fast hold of his forefinger till we reached the confines of the place. And on our return through the court-yard, after visiting another part of the establishment, here again was this same little Wretchedness waiting for its victim, with a smile of joyful, and yet dull recognition about its scabby mouth and in its rheumy eyes. No doubt, the child's mission in reference to our friend was to remind him that he was responsible, in his degree, for all the sufferings and misdemeanors of the world in which he lived, and was not entitled to look upon a particle of its dark calamity as if it were none of his concern: the offspring of a brother's iniquity being his own blood-relation, and the guilt, likewise, a burden on him, unless he expiated it by better deeds.

So I watched the struggle in his mind with a lot of interest, and I genuinely believe he did something heroic and achieved more than he ever imagined for his ultimate salvation when he picked up the disgusting child and held it as gently as if he were its father. Of course, we all smiled at him at the time, but we probably would have done pretty much the same thing in a similar situation. The child, at least, seemed pleased with his behavior because after he held it for a while and set it down, it still stayed close, holding onto his forefinger until we reached the edge of the area. And on our way back through the courtyard after visiting another part of the place, there was that same little Wretchedness waiting for its victim, with a smile of joyful yet dull recognition around its scabby mouth and in its watery eyes. No doubt, the child's purpose concerning our friend was to remind him that he was responsible, in his own way, for all the suffering and wrongdoings in the world he lived in, and he had no right to ignore even a part of its dark troubles as if they didn't concern him: the child of a brother's wickedness being his own relation, and the guilt, too, resting on him unless he made up for it with better actions.

All the children in this ward seemed to be invalids, and, going up stairs, we found more of them in the same or a worse condition than the little creature just described, with their mothers (or more probably other women, for the infants were mostly foundlings) in attendance as nurses. The matron of the ward, a middle-aged woman, remarkably kind and motherly in aspect, was walking to and fro across the chamber—on that weary journey in which careful mothers and nurses travel so continually and so far, and gain never a step of progress—with an unquiet baby in her arms. She assured us that she enjoyed her occupation, being exceedingly fond of children; and, in fact, the absence of timidity in all the little people was a sufficient proof that they could have had no experience of harsh treatment, though, on the other hand, none of them appeared to be attracted to one individual more than another. In this point they differed widely from the poor child below stairs. They seemed to recognize a universal motherhood in womankind, and cared not which individual might be the mother of the moment. I found their tameness as shocking as did Alexander Selkirk that of the brute subjects of his else solitary kingdom. It was a sort of tame familiarity, a perfect indifference to the approach of strangers, such as I never noticed in other children. I accounted for it partly by their nerveless, unstrung state of body, incapable of the quick thrills of delight and fear which play upon the lively harp-strings of a healthy child's nature, and partly by their woful lack of acquaintance with a private home, and their being therefore destitute of the sweet home-bred shyness, which is like the sanctity of heaven about a mother-petted child. Their condition was like that of chickens hatched in an oven, and growing up without the especial guardianship of a matron hen: both the chicken and the child, methinks, must needs want something that is essential to their respective characters.

All the kids in this ward seemed to be sick, and as we went upstairs, we found even more of them in the same or worse condition than the little one we just described, with their mothers (or more likely other women, since most of the infants were foundlings) there as nurses. The matron of the ward, a middle-aged woman who looked very kind and motherly, was pacing back and forth across the room—on that exhausting journey that careful mothers and nurses make so frequently and so far, without making any real progress—holding a restless baby in her arms. She told us that she enjoyed her job because she loved children so much; and in fact, the lack of fear from all the little ones was proof enough that they hadn’t experienced harsh treatment. However, none of them seemed to prefer one person over another. This set them apart from the poor child downstairs. They seemed to recognize a universal motherhood in all women and didn’t care who happened to be their current caregiver. I found their calmness as shocking as Alexander Selkirk would have found the behavior of the animals in his otherwise solitary kingdom. It was a kind of tame familiarity, an utter indifference to the presence of strangers, unlike anything I had seen in other children. I figured it was partly due to their weak, unresponsive state, which made them incapable of the quick bursts of joy and fear that healthy kids experience, and partly due to their sad lack of experience with a private home, leaving them without the sweet, innocent shyness that feels like a sacred bond for a mothered child. Their state was similar to chicks raised in an oven, growing up without the special care of a mother hen: both the chick and the child, I think, must lack something essential to their nature.

In this chamber (which was spacious, containing a large number of beds) there was a clear fire burning on the hearth, as in all the other occupied rooms; and directly in front of the blaze sat a woman holding a baby, which, beyond all reach of comparison, was the most horrible object that ever afflicted my sight. Days afterwards—nay, even now, when I bring it up vividly before my mind's eye—it seemed to lie upon the floor of my heart, polluting my moral being with the sense of something grievously amiss in the entire conditions of humanity. The holiest man could not be otherwise than full of wickedness, the chastest virgin seemed impure, in a world where such a babe was possible. The governor whispered me, apart, that, like nearly all the rest of them, it was the child of unhealthy parents. Ah, yes! There was the mischief. This spectral infant, a hideous mockery of the visible link which Love creates between man and woman, was born of disease and sin. Diseased Sin was its father, and Sinful Disease its mother, and their offspring lay in the woman's arms like a nursing Pestilence, which, could it live and grow up, would make the world a more accursed abode than ever heretofore. Thank Heaven, it could not live! This baby, if we must give it that sweet name, seemed to be three or four months old, but, being such an unthrifty changeling, might have been considerably older. It was all covered with blotches, and preternaturally dark and discolored; it was withered away, quite shrunken and fleshless; it breathed only amid pantings and gaspings, and moaned painfully at every gasp. The only comfort in reference to it was the evident impossibility of its surviving to draw many more of those miserable, moaning breaths; and it would have been infinitely less heart-depressing to see it die, right before my eyes, than to depart and carry it alive in my remembrance, still suffering the incalculable torture of its little life. I can by no means express how horrible this infant was, neither ought I to attempt it. And yet I must add one final touch. Young as the poor little creature was, its pain and misery had endowed it with a premature intelligence, insomuch that its eyes seemed to stare at the bystanders out of their sunken sockets knowingly and appealingly, as if summoning us one and all to witness the deadly wrong of its existence. At least, I so interpreted its look, when it positively met and responded to my own awe-stricken gaze, and therefore I lay the case, as far as I am able, before mankind, on whom God has imposed the necessity to suffer in soul and body till this dark and dreadful wrong be righted.

In this room (which was spacious and had a lot of beds), there was a clear fire burning in the hearth, just like in all the other occupied rooms; directly in front of the flame sat a woman holding a baby, which, beyond any comparison, was the most horrible sight I had ever seen. Days later — no, even now, when I vividly recall it — it feels like it lies on the floor of my heart, tainting my moral being with the sense of something seriously wrong in the entire human experience. The holiest person could only be filled with wickedness, and the purest virgin seemed impure in a world where such a baby could exist. The governor whispered to me, on the side, that, like nearly all the others, it was the child of unhealthy parents. Ah, yes! There was the problem. This ghostly infant, a grotesque mockery of the visible bond that Love creates between man and woman, was born of disease and sin. Diseased Sin was its father, and Sinful Disease was its mother, and their offspring lay in the woman's arms like a nursing Pestilence, which, if it could live and grow up, would turn the world into a more cursed place than it had ever been. Thank God, it could not live! This baby, if we must call it that sweet name, appeared to be three or four months old, but, being such a poor changeling, could have been quite a bit older. It was covered in blotches, unnaturally dark and discolored; it was withered away, entirely shrunken and lacking flesh; it breathed only in gasps and panting, and moaned painfully with every breath. The only comfort regarding it was the clear impossibility of it surviving to take many more of those miserable, moaning breaths; and it would have been infinitely less depressing to see it die right in front of me than to leave and carry it alive in my memory, still enduring the unimaginable agony of its little life. I can’t fully express how horrible this infant was, nor should I try. Yet I must add one final detail. Young as the poor little creature was, its pain and suffering had given it a premature awareness, so that its eyes seemed to stare at the onlookers from their sunken sockets with a knowing and pleading look, as if calling all of us to witness the deadly injustice of its existence. At least, that’s how I interpreted its look when it met and responded to my own shocked gaze, and therefore I lay this situation, as much as I can, before humanity, on whom God has placed the burden of suffering in soul and body until this dark and dreadful wrong is made right.

Thence we went to the school-rooms, which were underneath the chapel. The pupils, like the children whom we had just seen, were, in large proportion, foundlings. Almost without exception, they looked sickly, with marks of eruptive trouble in their doltish faces, and a general tendency to diseases of the eye. Moreover, the poor little wretches appeared to be uneasy within their skins, and screwed themselves about on the benches in a disagreeably suggestive way, as if they had inherited the evil habits of their parents as an innermost garment of the same texture and material as the shirt of Nessus, and must wear it with unspeakable discomfort as long as they lived. I saw only a single child that looked healthy; and on my pointing him out, the governor informed me that this little boy, the sole exception to the miserable aspect of his school-fellows, was not a foundling, nor properly a work-house child, being born of respectable parentage, and his father one of the officers of the institution. As for the remainder,—the hundred pale abortions to be counted against one rosy-cheeked boy,—what shall we say or do? Depressed by the sight of so much misery, and uninventive of remedies for the evils that force themselves on my perception, I can do little more than recur to the idea already hinted at in the early part of this article, regarding the speedy necessity of a new deluge. So far as these children are concerned, at any rate, it would be a blessing to the human race, which they will contribute to enervate and corrupt,—a greater blessing to themselves, who inherit no patrimony but disease and vice, and in whose souls, if there be a spark of God's life, this seems the only possible mode of keeping it aglow,—if every one of them could be drowned to-night, by their best friends, instead of being put tenderly to bed. This heroic method of treating human maladies, moral and material, is certainly beyond the scope of man's discretionary rights, and probably will not be adopted by Divine Providence until the opportunity of milder reformation shall have been offered us again and again, through a series of future ages.

We then went to the classrooms beneath the chapel. The students, like the children we had just seen, were mostly orphans. Almost all of them looked unwell, with signs of skin issues on their dull faces and a general tendency toward eye diseases. Additionally, these poor kids seemed uncomfortable in their own skin, fidgeting on the benches in a way that made it clear they had inherited the bad habits of their parents, like an uncomfortable garment that they had to wear for their entire lives. I only saw one child who looked healthy; when I pointed him out, the governor told me that this boy, the only exception among his miserable classmates, was not an orphan or a typical workhouse child, but came from a respectable family, with his father being one of the staff at the institution. As for the rest—the hundred pale, frail kids compared to one rosy-cheeked boy—what can we say or do? Troubled by the sight of so much suffering and unable to come up with solutions for the issues before me, I can only return to the thought I mentioned earlier in this article about the urgent need for a new deluge. For these children, it would be a blessing for humanity, which they will only weaken and spoil—an even greater blessing for them, as they inherit nothing but illness and vice. If there’s a spark of life from God in their souls, this seems to be the only way to keep it alive—if every one of them could be drowned tonight by their loving friends instead of being gently put to bed. This drastic approach to human suffering, both moral and physical, is certainly beyond what humanity has the right to decide, and probably won’t be enacted by Divine Providence until we’ve had multiple chances for kinder reforms over the ages to come.

It may be fair to acknowledge that the humane and excellent governor, as well as other persons better acquainted with the subject than myself, took a less gloomy view of it, though still so dark a one as to involve scanty consolation. They remarked that individuals of the male sex, picked up in the streets and nurtured in the workhouse, sometimes succeed tolerably well in life, because they are taught trades before being turned into the world, and, by dint of immaculate behavior and good luck, are not, unlikely to get employment and earn a livelihood. The case is different with the girls. They can only go to service, and are invariably rejected by families of respectability on account of their origin, and for the better reason of their unfitness to fill satisfactorily even the meanest situations in a well-ordered English household. Their resource is to take service with people only a step or two above the poorest class, with whom they fare scantily, endure harsh treatment, lead shifting and precarious lives, and finally drop into the slough of evil, through which, in their best estate, they do but pick their slimy way on stepping-stones.

It’s worth noting that the kind and capable governor, along with others who know more about this than I do, had a less grim outlook on the situation, though it was still dark enough to offer little comfort. They pointed out that boys who are found in the streets and raised in the workhouse sometimes manage to do fairly well in life because they're taught trades before they’re sent out into the world and, through good behavior and a bit of luck, can find jobs and make a living. The situation is different for girls. They can only work as domestic help, and respectable families usually reject them because of their background and, more importantly, because they’re not fit to handle even the simplest roles in a well-run English home. Their option is to find work with people just a step above the very poor, where they are poorly treated, live unstable and uncertain lives, and ultimately fall into a cycle of hardship, where they struggle to get by on whatever they can manage.

From the schools we went to the bake-house, and the brew-house (for such cruelty is not harbored in the heart of a true Englishman as to deny a pauper his daily allowance of beer), and through the kitchens, where we beheld an immense pot over the fire, surging and walloping with some kind of a savory stew that filled it up to its brim. We also visited a tailor's shop, and a shoemaker's shop, in both of which a number of mien, and pale, diminutive apprentices, were at work, diligently enough, though seemingly with small heart in the business. Finally, the governor ushered us into a shed, inside of which was piled up an immense quantity of new coffins. They were of the plainest description, made of pine boards, probably of American growth, not very nicely smoothed by the plane, neither painted nor stained with black, but provided with a loop of rope at either end for the convenience of lifting the rude box and its inmate into the cart that shall carry them to the burial-ground. There, in holes ten feet deep, the paupers are buried one above another, mingling their relics indistinguishably. In another world may they resume their individuality, and find it a happier one than here!

From the schools, we went to the bakery and the brewery (because no true Englishman would be so cruel as to deny a poor person their daily beer), and through the kitchens, where we saw a huge pot over the fire, bubbling and sloshing with some kind of delicious stew that filled it to the brim. We also stopped by a tailor's shop and a shoemaker's workshop, where a number of young, pale apprentices were busy working, putting in effort but seeming to lack enthusiasm for the job. Finally, the governor led us into a shed, where a large number of new coffins were stacked up. They were very simple, made of pine boards, likely from America, not very smoothly finished, neither painted nor stained black, but with a loop of rope at each end to help lift the rough box and its occupant into the cart that would take them to the burial ground. There, in graves ten feet deep, the poor are buried one on top of another, their remains mixed together beyond recognition. In another world, may they regain their individuality and find a happier existence than they had here!

As we departed, a character came under our notice which I have met with in all almshouses, whether of the city or village, or in England or America. It was the familiar simpleton, who shuffled across the court-yard, clattering his wooden-soled shoes, to greet us with a howl or a laugh, I hardly know which, holding out his hand for a penny, and chuckling grossly when it was given him. All under-witted persons, so far as my experience goes, have this craving for copper coin, and appear to estimate its value by a miraculous instinct, which is one of the earliest gleams of human intelligence while the nobler faculties are yet in abeyance. There may come a time, even in this world, when we shall all understand that our tendency to the individual appropriation of gold and broad acres, fine houses, and such good and beautiful things as are equally enjoyable by a multitude, is but a trait of imperfectly developed intelligence, like the simpleton's cupidity of a penny. When that day dawns,—and probably not till then,—I imagine that there will be no more poor streets nor need of almshouses.

As we left, we noticed a character that I've seen in every almshouse, whether in the city or the countryside, in England or America. It was the familiar simpleton, who shuffled across the courtyard, making noise with his wooden-soled shoes, to greet us with either a howl or a laugh—I can't quite tell which—and he held out his hand for a penny, chuckling loudly when we gave him one. In my experience, all people with limited intellect have this strong desire for small change and seem to gauge its value with an instinct that reflects one of the first signs of human intelligence, while more advanced faculties are still dormant. There may come a time, even in this world, when we all realize that our tendency to hoard gold, vast lands, fancy homes, and other good and beautiful things that could be enjoyed by many is just a sign of underdeveloped intelligence, similar to the simpleton's craving for a penny. When that day comes—and probably not before—I'm guessing that there will be no more poverty-stricken streets or need for almshouses.

I was once present at the wedding of some poor English people, and was deeply impressed by the spectacle, though by no means with such proud and delightful emotions as seem to have affected all England on the recent occasion of the marriage of its Prince. It was in the Cathedral at Manchester, a particularly black and grim old structure, into which I had stepped to examine some ancient and curious wood-carvings within the choir. The woman in attendance greeted me with a smile (which always glimmers forth on the feminine visage, I know not why, when a wedding is in question), and asked me to take a seat in the nave till some poor parties were married, it being the Easter holidays, and a good time for them to marry, because no fees would be demanded by the clergyman. I sat down accordingly, and soon the parson and his clerk appeared at the altar, and a considerable crowd of people made their entrance at a side-door, and ranged themselves in a long, huddled line across the chancel. They were my acquaintances of the poor streets, or persons in a precisely similar condition of life, and were now come to their marriage-ceremony in just such garbs as I had always seen them wear: the men in their loafers' coats, out at elbows, or their laborers' jackets, defaced with grimy toil; the women drawing their shabby shawls tighter about their shoulders, to hide the raggedness beneath; all of them unbrushed, unshaven, unwashed, uncombed, and wrinkled with penury and care; nothing virgin-like in the brides, nor hopeful or energetic in the bridegrooms;—they were, in short, the mere rags and tatters of the human race, whom some east-wind of evil omen, howling along the streets, had chanced to sweep together into an unfragrant heap. Each and all of them, conscious of his or her individual misery, had blundered into the strange miscalculation of supposing that they could lessen the sum of it by multiplying it into the misery of another person. All the couples (and it was difficult, in such a confused crowd, to compute exactly their number) stood up at once, and had execution done upon them in the lump, the clergyman addressing only small parts of the service to each individual pair, but so managing the larger portion as to include the whole company without the trouble of repetition. By this compendious contrivance, one would apprehend, he came dangerously near making every man and woman the husband or wife of every other; nor, perhaps, would he have perpetrated much additional mischief by the mistake; but, after receiving a benediction in common, they assorted themselves in their own fashion, as they only knew how, and departed to the garrets, or the cellars, or the unsheltered street-corners, where their honeymoon and subsequent lives were to be spent. The parson smiled decorously, the clerk and the sexton grinned broadly, the female attendant tittered almost aloud, and even the married parties seemed to see something exceedingly funny in the affair; but for my part, though generally apt enough to be tickled by a joke, I laid it away in my memory as one of the saddest sights I ever looked upon.

I once attended the wedding of some poor people in England and was quite struck by the event, though not with the same proud and joyful feelings that seemed to affect all of England during the recent marriage of its Prince. It took place in the Manchester Cathedral, a particularly dark and grim old building, where I had stepped in to check out some ancient and interesting wood carvings in the choir. The woman there welcomed me with a smile (which, for some reason, always appears on a woman's face when a wedding is happening) and invited me to take a seat in the main area until some poor couples got married, it being the Easter holidays—a good time for them to tie the knot since the clergyman wouldn’t charge any fees. I sat down as requested, and soon the priest and his clerk showed up at the altar, followed by a significant crowd of people entering through a side door and lining up across the chancel. They were my acquaintances from the poor neighborhoods or others in similar situations, showing up for their marriage ceremony in the same worn clothes I’d always seen them wear: men in their tattered work coats or laborers' jackets, stained and worn; women pulling their shabby shawls tighter around their shoulders to conceal the rips beneath; all of them looking unkempt, unshaven, dirty, and wrinkled from hardship and worry; none of the brides looked fresh or hopeful, and the grooms didn’t seem energetic either—they were, in short, the mere scraps of humanity, who had been swept together by some bad omen of the east wind into a smelly pile. Each one of them, aware of their individual struggles, had mistakenly thought that combining their misery with someone else’s would somehow lessen it. All the couples (and it was hard to tell how many there were in such a jumbled crowd) stood up together and were processed as a whole; the clergyman addressed only small parts of the ceremony to each specific couple, but managed the larger parts in a way that included everyone without making him repeat anything. With this clever approach, one might think he nearly made every man and woman into the spouse of every other; perhaps he wouldn’t have caused much more confusion by that error, but after receiving a shared blessing, they sorted themselves out in their own way and left for their garrets, cellars, or the unprotected street corners where they’d spend their honeymoon and lives after. The priest smiled in a proper way, the clerk and the sexton grinned widely, the woman attending tittered almost loudly, and even the newlyweds seemed to find something very funny in the situation; but for me, although I usually find humor in jokes, I remembered it as one of the saddest things I ever saw.

Not very long afterwards, I happened to be passing the same venerable Cathedral, and heard a clang of joyful bells, and beheld a bridal party coming down the steps towards a carriage and four horses, with a portly coachman and two postilions, that waited at the gate. One parson and one service had amalgamated the wretchedness of a score of paupers; a Bishop and three or four clergymen had combined their spiritual might to forge the golden links of this other marriage-bond. The bridegroom's mien had a sort of careless and kindly English pride; the bride floated along in her white drapery, a creature, so nice and delicate that it was a luxury to see her, and a pity that her silk slippers should touch anything so grimy as the old stones of the churchyard avenue. The crowd of ragged people, who always cluster to witness what they may of an aristocratic wedding, broke into audible admiration of the bride's beauty and the bridegroom's manliness, and uttered prayers and ejaculations (possibly paid for in alms) for the happiness of both. If the most favorable of earthly conditions could make them happy, they had every prospect of it. They were going to live on their abundance in one of those stately and delightful English homes, such as no other people ever created or inherited, a hall set far and safe within its own private grounds, and surrounded with venerable trees, shaven lawns, rich shrubbery, and trimmest pathways, the whole so artfully contrived and tended that summer rendered it a paradise, and even winter would hardly disrobe it of its beauty; and all this fair property seemed more exclusively and inalienably their own, because of its descent through many forefathers, each of whom had added an improvement or a charm, and thus transmitted it with a stronger stamp of rightful possession to his heir. And is it possible, after all, that there may be a flaw in the title-deeds? Is, or is not, the system wrong that gives one married pair so immense a superfluity of luxurious home, and shuts out a million others from any home whatever? One day or another, safe as they deem themselves, and safe as the hereditary temper of the people really tends to make them, the gentlemen of England will be compelled to face this question.

Not long after, I happened to pass by the old Cathedral and heard the joyful ringing of bells. I saw a wedding party coming down the steps toward a fancy carriage pulled by four horses, with a portly driver and two groomsmen waiting at the gate. One priest and one service had combined the woes of a dozen poor people; a Bishop and three or four clergymen had joined forces to create the sacred bonds of this marriage. The groom had a bit of relaxed, warm English pride; the bride glided in her white dress, so graceful and delicate that it was a pleasure to see her, and a shame that her silk slippers had to touch the dirty old stones of the churchyard path. The group of ragged onlookers, who always gather to witness an aristocratic wedding, openly admired the bride's beauty and the groom's charm, offering prayers and cheers (possibly in exchange for charity) for their happiness. If anyone could be happy in the best earthly circumstances, it was them. They were set to live in abundance in one of those grand and lovely English homes that no other culture has ever matched, a hall tucked safely within its own private grounds, surrounded by ancient trees, manicured lawns, lush bushes, and neat paths, all so beautifully arranged that summer made it a paradise, and even winter barely stripped it of its beauty; and all this beautiful property felt even more like it belonged only to them, thanks to its inheritance through many generations, each adding an improvement or charm, thus passing it down with a stronger claim of rightful ownership to their heirs. And is it really possible that there could be a flaw in the title deeds? Is the system flawed that gives one married couple such an overwhelming abundance of luxury while excluding millions of others from having any home at all? One day, whether they believe they’re secure or not, the gentlemen of England will have to confront this question.





CIVIC BANQUETS.

It has often perplexed one to imagine how an Englishman will be able to reconcile himself to any future state of existence from which the earthly institution of dinner shall be excluded. Even if he fail to take his appetite along with him (which it seems to me hardly possible to believe, since this endowment is so essential to his composition), the immortal day must still admit an interim of two or three hours during which he will be conscious of a slight distaste, at all events, if not an absolute repugnance, to merely spiritual nutriment. The idea of dinner has so imbedded itself among his highest and deepest characteristics, so illuminated itself with intellect and softened itself with the kindest emotions of his heart, so linked itself with Church and State, and grown so majestic with long hereditary customs and ceremonies, that, by taking it utterly away, Death, instead of putting the final touch to his perfection, would leave him infinitely less complete than we have already known him. He could not be roundly happy. Paradise, among all its enjoyments, would lack one daily felicity which his sombre little island possessed. Perhaps it is not irreverent to conjecture that a provision may have been made, in this particular, for the Englishman's exceptional necessities. It strikes me that Milton was of the opinion here suggested, and may have intended to throw out a delightful and consolatory hope for his countrymen, when he represents the genial archangel as playing his part with such excellent appetite at Adam's dinner-table, and confining himself to fruit and vegetables only because, in those early days of her housekeeping, Eve had no more acceptable viands to set before him. Milton, indeed, had a true English taste for the pleasures of the table, though refined by the lofty and poetic discipline to which he had subjected himself. It is delicately implied in the refection in Paradise, and more substantially, though still elegantly, betrayed in the sonnet proposing to "Laurence, of virtuous father virtuous son," a series of nice little dinners in midwinter and it blazes fully out in that untasted banquet which, elaborate as it was, Satan tossed up in a trice from the kitchen-ranges of Tartarus.

It often puzzles people to think about how an Englishman could cope with any afterlife that doesn’t include the earthly custom of dinner. Even if he can’t bring his appetite with him (which seems hard to believe, since it's such a key part of who he is), the eternal day must still allow for a few hours where he would feel a slight dislike, if not a complete aversion, to purely spiritual nourishment. The concept of dinner is so deeply woven into his character, so enlightened by intellect and softened by the warmest feelings of his heart, that it’s tied to the Church and State, and has become so grand through generations of customs and rituals, that taking it away would leave him far less whole than we already know him to be, rather than achieving perfection with Death. He couldn't truly be happy. Paradise, despite all its pleasures, would miss one daily joy that his gloomy little island had. Perhaps it’s not too bold to suggest that some arrangement might have been made for the unique needs of the Englishman. I feel that Milton may have shared this idea, possibly intending to offer a delightful and comforting thought for his fellow countrymen when he depicts the cheerful archangel enjoying a hearty meal at Adam's dinner table, limiting himself to fruits and vegetables only because, in those early days of her cooking, Eve had no better dishes to offer. Milton indeed had a genuine English appreciation for the pleasures of dining, although refined by the high and poetic standards he placed upon himself. This is subtly hinted at in the meal in Paradise, and more clearly expressed, though still with elegance, in the sonnet proposing a series of lovely little dinners in midwinter to “Laurence, of virtuous father virtuous son,” and it fully emerges in that elaborate feast which, despite its complexity, Satan whipped up in no time from the kitchens of Tartarus.

Among this people, indeed, so wise in their generation, dinner has a kind of sanctity quite independent of the dishes that may be set upon the table; so that, if it be only a mutton-chop, they treat it with due reverence, and are rewarded with a degree of enjoyment which such reckless devourers as ourselves do not often find in our richest abundance. It is good to see how staunch they are after fifty or sixty years of heroic eating, still relying upon their digestive powers and indulging a vigorous appetite; whereas an American has generally lost the one and learned to distrust the other long before reaching the earliest decline of life; and thenceforward he makes little account of his dinner, and dines at his peril, if at all. I know not whether my countrymen will allow me to tell them, though I think it scarcely too much to affirm, that on this side of the water, people never dine. At any rate, abundantly as Nature has provided us with most of the material requisites, the highest possible dinner has never yet been eaten in America. It is the consummate flower of civilization and refinement; and our inability to produce it, or to appreciate its admirable beauty, if a happy inspiration should bring it into bloom, marks fatally the limit of culture which we have attained.

Among these people, who are so wise in their own way, dinner has a sort of sacredness that isn't dependent on the food served; even if it’s just a mutton chop, they treat it with respect and enjoy it in a way that those of us who indulge without thought often miss out on, even when we have plenty. It’s impressive to see how steadfast they are after fifty or sixty years of hearty eating, still trusting their digestive systems and enjoying a strong appetite. In contrast, an American usually loses that trust and confidence long before even starting to show signs of aging, leading them to undervalue their dinners and eat at their own risk, if they eat at all. I’m not sure my fellow countrymen would agree, but I don’t think it’s overstating things to say that over here, people don’t really dine. Regardless of how abundantly nature has provided us with the basic necessities, the ultimate dinner has never truly been enjoyed in America. It represents the pinnacle of civilization and refinement, and our inability to create or fully appreciate its exquisite nature when it does appear highlights the limits of our cultural development.

It is not to be supposed, however, that the mob of cultivated Englishmen know how to dine in this elevated sense. The unpolishable ruggedness of the national character is still an impediment to them, even in that particular line where they are best qualified to excel. Though often present at good men's feasts, I remember only a single dinner, which, while lamentably conscious that many of its higher excellences were thrown away upon me, I yet could feel to be a perfect work of art. It could not, without unpardonable coarseness, be styled a matter of animal enjoyment, because, out of the very perfection of that lower bliss, there had arisen a dream-like development of spiritual happiness. As in the masterpieces of painting and poetry, there was a something intangible, a final deliciousness that only fluttered about your comprehension, vanishing whenever you tried to detain it, and compelling you to recognize it by faith rather than sense. It seemed as if a diviner set of senses were requisite, and had been partly supplied, for the special fruition of this banquet, and that the guests around the table (only eight in number) were becoming so educated, polished, and softened, by the delicate influences of what they ate and drunk, as to be now a little more than mortal for the nonce. And there was that gentle, delicious sadness, too, which we find in the very summit of our most exquisite enjoyments, and feel it a charm beyond all the gayety through which it keeps breathing its undertone. In the present case, it was worth a heavier sigh, to reflect that such a festal achievement,—the production of so much art, skill, fancy, invention, and perfect taste,—the growth of all the ages, which appeared to have been ripening for this hour, since man first began to eat and to moisten his food with wine,—must lavish its happiness upon so brief a moment, when other beautiful things can be made a joy forever. Yet a dinner like this is no better than we can get, any day, at the rejuvenescent Cornhill Coffee-House, unless the whole man, with soul, intellect, and stomach, is ready to appreciate it, and unless, moreover, there is such a harmony in all the circumstances and accompaniments, and especially such a pitch of well-according minds, that nothing shall jar rudely against the guest's thoroughly awakened sensibilities. The world, and especially our part of it, being the rough, ill-assorted, and tumultuous place we find it, a beefsteak is about as good as any other dinner.

It shouldn't be assumed that the crowd of cultured Englishmen know how to dine in this refined way. The unrefinable roughness of the national character still holds them back, even in the area where they should excel. Although they often attend the feasts of good people, I can only recall one dinner that, while painfully aware that many of its finer qualities were wasted on me, I still recognized as a masterpiece. It couldn’t be considered a mere matter of physical enjoyment, because, from the very perfection of that basic pleasure, a dream-like development of spiritual happiness emerged. Like in great works of art and poetry, there was something intangible, a final delightful essence that only danced around your understanding, disappearing whenever you tried to grasp it, requiring you to recognize it through faith rather than your senses. It felt as if a more divine set of senses was necessary, and had been partially provided, for fully enjoying this feast, making the eight guests at the table feel just a bit more than mortal. There was also that gentle, sweet sadness that we find in the peak of our most exquisite pleasures, a charm that surpasses all the brightness through which it continues to echo. In this case, it was worth a heavier sigh to realize that such a festive achievement—producing so much art, skill, imagination, creativity, and perfect taste—the culmination of all ages that seemed to have been maturing for this moment since humanity first began to eat and drink wine—must pour its joy into such a fleeting moment, while other beautiful things can be made to last forever. Yet, a dinner like this is no better than what we can experience any day at the revitalized Cornhill Coffee-House unless the whole person, mind, spirit, and appetite, is ready to appreciate it, and unless, furthermore, there is a harmony in the surroundings and all the elements, particularly a shared level of understanding among the guests, so that nothing clashes with their fully awakened sensitivities. Given the world, especially our part of it, being such a rough, mismatched, and chaotic place, a steak dinner is just as good as any other meal.

The foregoing reminiscence, however, has drawn me aside from the main object of my sketch, in which I purposed to give a slight idea of those public, or partially public banquets, the custom of which so thoroughly prevails among the English people, that nothing is ever decided upon, in matters of peace and war, until they have chewed upon it in the shape of roast-beef, and talked it fully over in their cups. Nor are these festivities merely occasional, but of stated recurrence in all considerable municipalities and associated bodies. The most ancient times appear to have been as familiar with them as the Englishmen of to-day. In many of the old English towns, you find some stately Gothic hall or chamber in which the Mayor and other authorities of the place have long held their sessions; and always, in convenient contiguity, there is a dusky kitchen, with an immense fireplace where an ox might be roasting at his ease, though the less gigantic scale of modern cookery may now have permitted the cobwebs to gather in its chimney. St. Mary's Hall, in Coventry, is so good a specimen of an ancient banqueting-room, that perhaps I may profitably devote a page or two to the description of it.

The previous memory, however, has taken me away from the main focus of my piece, where I intended to give a brief overview of those public, or partially public, banquets that are so common among the English people. It's said that nothing is ever settled regarding matters of peace and war until they’ve mulled it over with a hearty meal of roast beef and discussed it extensively over drinks. These celebrations aren't just occasional; they happen regularly in all major cities and organizations. Even in ancient times, they seemed just as familiar to people as they are to modern Englishmen. In many of the old English towns, you’ll find an impressive Gothic hall or chamber where the Mayor and other local officials have long conducted their meetings. And always nearby, there’s a dark kitchen with a large fireplace where an ox could once have been roasting comfortably, even if the smaller scale of today’s cooking might have led to some cobwebs collecting in its chimney. St. Mary's Hall in Coventry is such a remarkable example of an ancient banquet room that I might as well dedicate a page or two to describing it.

In a narrow street, opposite to St. Michael's Church, one of the three famous spires of Coventry, you behold a mediaeval edifice, in the basement of which is such a venerable and now deserted kitchen as I have above alluded to, and, on the same level, a cellar, with low stone pillars and intersecting arches, like the crypt of a cathedral. Passing up a well-worn staircase, the oaken balustrade of which is as black as ebony, you enter the fine old hall, some sixty feet in length, and broad and lofty in proportion. It is lighted by six windows of modern stained glass, on one side, and by the immense and magnificent arch of another window at the farther end of the room, its rich and ancient panes constituting a genuine historical piece, in which are represented some of the kingly personages of old times, with their heraldic blazonries. Notwithstanding the colored light thus thrown into the hall, and though it was noonday when I last saw it, the panelling of black-oak, and some faded tapestry that hung round the walls, together with the cloudy vault of the roof above, made a gloom, which the richness only illuminated into more appreciable effect. The tapestry is wrought with figures in the dress of Henry VI.'s time (which is the date of the hall), and is regarded by antiquaries as authentic evidence both for the costume of that epoch, and, I believe, for the actual portraiture of men known in history. They are as colorless as ghosts, however, and vanish drearily into the old stitch-work of their substance when you try to make them out. Coats-of-arms were formerly emblazoned all round the hall, but have been almost rubbed out by people hanging their overcoats against them or by women with dishclouts and scrubbing-brushes, obliterating hereditary glories in their blind hostility to dust and spiders' webs. Full-length portraits of several English kings, Charles II. being the earliest, hang on the walls; and on the dais, or elevated part of the floor, stands an antique chair of state, which several royal characters are traditionally said to have occupied while feasting here with their loyal subjects of Coventry. It is roomy enough for a person of kingly bulk, or even two such, but angular and uncomfortable, reminding me of the oaken settles which used to be seen in old-fashioned New England kitchens.

In a narrow street across from St. Michael's Church, one of Coventry's three famous spires, you'll find a medieval building. In the basement, there's an ancient and now-empty kitchen that I mentioned earlier, along with a cellar featuring low stone pillars and intersecting arches, resembling a cathedral's crypt. Climbing a well-worn staircase with an oak balustrade as black as ebony, you enter a beautiful old hall about sixty feet long, wide, and tall. It's lit by six modern stained glass windows on one side and by a massive, impressive arch of another window at the far end of the room. The rich and ancient panes in that window make up a genuine historical piece depicting some of the royal figures from the past along with their heraldic emblems. Despite the colorful light flooding into the hall and the fact that it was noon when I last saw it, the black oak paneling, some faded tapestry hanging around the walls, and the cloudy vaulted ceiling created a gloom, enhanced by the richness of the surroundings. The tapestry features figures dressed in the style of Henry VI's era (the date of the hall) and is regarded by historians as authentic evidence of the fashion from that time and, I believe, as actual portraits of historical figures. They look as colorless as ghosts and seem to fade drearily into the old embroidery of their fabric when you try to make them out. Coats of arms that once adorned the hall have nearly been erased by people hanging their coats on them or by women cleaning with dishcloths and scrubbing brushes, unintentionally wiping away the family legacies in their quest to combat dust and spider webs. Full-length portraits of several English kings, starting with Charles II, hang on the walls. In the elevated area of the hall stands an antique chair of state, which several royal figures are said to have occupied while enjoying feasts with their loyal subjects from Coventry. It’s spacious enough for a king-sized person, or even two, but it's angular and uncomfortable, reminding me of the oak benches once found in old-fashioned New England kitchens.

Overhead, supported by a self-sustaining power, without the aid of a single pillar, is the original ceiling of oak, precisely similar in shape to the roof of a barn, with all the beams and rafters plainly to be seen. At the remote height of sixty feet, you hardly discern that they are carved with figures of angels and doubtless many other devices, of which the admirable Gothic art is wasted in the duskiness that has so long been brooding there. Over the entrance of the hall, opposite the great arched window, the party-colored radiance of which glimmers faintly through the interval, is a gallery for minstrels; and a row of ancient suits of armor is suspended from its balustrade. It impresses me, too (for, having gone so far, I would fain leave nothing untouched upon), that I remember, somewhere about these venerable precincts, a picture of the Countess Godiva on horseback, in which the artist has been so niggardly of that illustrious lady's hair, that, if she had no ampler garniture, there was certainly much need for the good people of Coventry to shut their eyes. After all my pains, I fear that I have made but a poor hand at the description, as regards a transference of the scene from my own mind to the reader's. It gave me a most vivid idea of antiquity that had been very little tampered with; insomuch that, if a group of steel-clad knights had come clanking through the doorway, and a bearded and beruffed old figure had handed in a stately dame, rustling in gorgeous robes of a long-forgotten fashion, unveiling a face of beauty somewhat tarnished in the mouldy tomb, yet stepping majestically to the trill of harp and viol from the minstrels' gallery, while the rusty armor responded with a hollow ringing sound beneath,—why, I should have felt that these shadows, once so familiar with the spot, had a better right in St. Mary's Hall than I, a stranger from a far country which has no Past. But the moral of the foregoing description is to show how tenaciously this love of pompous dinners, this reverence for dinner as a sacred institution, has caught hold of the English character; since, from the earliest recognizable period, we find them building their civic banqueting-halls as magnificently as their palaces or cathedrals.

Overhead, held up by its own power, without a single pillar in sight, is the original oak ceiling, shaped just like a barn roof, with all the beams and rafters clearly visible. At the lofty height of sixty feet, you can barely see that they are carved with images of angels and undoubtedly many other designs, the splendid Gothic artistry lost in the gloom that has lingered there for so long. Above the entrance of the hall, across from the large arched window, the multicolored light glimmers faintly through the gap, and there’s a gallery for musicians; a line of ancient suits of armor hangs from its railing. I also remember, somewhere in these aged halls, a painting of Countess Godiva on horseback, where the artist has been so stingy with the illustrious lady's hair that if she had no other adornments, the good people of Coventry would definitely need to close their eyes. After all my efforts, I fear I haven't done a great job of conveying the scene from my mind to yours. It gave me a very vivid sense of history that has hardly been touched; enough so that if a group of armored knights had clanked through the doorway, and a bearded, ruffled old figure had escorted a noble lady, rustling in magnificent attire of a long-lost style, revealing a face of beauty somewhat faded by time, yet stepping regally to the tunes of the harp and viol from the musicians' gallery, while the rusty armor rang hollow beneath them—I would have felt that these shadows, once so familiar with the place, had a better claim to St. Mary's Hall than I, a stranger from a distant land without a past. But the point of this description is to show how deeply the love of grand dinners and the reverence for dinner as a sacred tradition is ingrained in the English character; since, from the earliest times we can recognize, they have been building their banquet halls as impressively as their palaces or cathedrals.

I know not whether the hall just described is now used for festive purposes, but others of similar antiquity and splendor still are. For example, there is Barber-Surgeons' Hall, in London, a very fine old room, adorned with admirably carved wood-work on the ceiling and walls. It is also enriched with Holbein's masterpiece, representing a grave assemblage of barbers and surgeons, all portraits (with such extensive beards that methinks one half of the company might have been profitably occupied in trimming the other), kneeling before King Henry VIII. Sir Robert Peel is said to have offered a thousand pounds for the liberty of cutting out one of the heads from this picture, he conditioning to have a perfect facsimile painted in. The room has many other pictures of distinguished members of the company in long-past times, and of some of the monarchs and statesmen of England, all darkened with age, but darkened into such ripe magnificence as only age could bestow. It is not my design to inflict any more specimens of ancient hall-painting on the reader; but it may be worth while to touch upon other modes of stateliness that still survive in these time-honored civic feasts, where there appears to be a singular assumption of dignity and solemn pomp by respectable citizens who would never dream of claiming any privilege of rank outside of their own sphere. Thus, I saw two caps of state for the warden and junior warden of the company, caps of silver (real coronets or crowns, indeed, for these city-grandees) wrought in open-work and lined with crimson velvet. In a strong-closet, opening from the hall, there was a great deal of rich plate to furnish forth the banquet-table, comprising hundreds of forks and spoons, a vast silver punch-bowl, the gift of some jolly king or other, and, besides a multitude of less noticeable vessels, two loving-cups, very elaborately wrought in silver gilt, one presented by Henry VIII., the other by Charles II. These cups, including the covers and pedestals, are very large and weighty, although the bowl-part would hardly contain more than half a pint of wine, which, when the custom was first established, each guest was probably expected to drink off at a draught. In passing them from hand to hand adown a long table of compotators, there is a peculiar ceremony which I may hereafter have occasion to describe. Meanwhile, if I might assume such a liberty, I should be glad to invite the reader to the official dinner-table of his Worship, the Mayor, at a large English seaport where I spent several years.

I’m not sure if the hall I just described is still used for celebrations, but there are others of similar age and grandeur that are. For instance, Barber-Surgeons' Hall in London is a beautifully maintained old room, decorated with expertly carved woodwork on the ceiling and walls. It also features Holbein's masterpiece, showcasing a solemn gathering of barbers and surgeons, all depicted as having such long beards that it seems like half of them could have spent their time trimming the others, kneeling before King Henry VIII. Sir Robert Peel reportedly offered a thousand pounds to be allowed to cut out one of the heads from this painting, agreeing to have an exact replica created in its place. The room also displays many other portraits of notable members of the company from long ago, as well as some of the monarchs and statesmen of England, all aged but showing a rich magnificence that only time could create. It's not my intention to burden the reader with more examples of old hall artwork; however, it’s worth mentioning other forms of grandeur that still exist in these storied civic banquets, where respectable citizens, who would never dream of claiming any sort of rank outside their sphere, carry an unusual air of dignity and solemnity. For example, I saw two state caps for the warden and junior warden of the company, made of silver (essentially crowns for these city officials) intricately designed and lined with crimson velvet. In a nearby strongroom off the hall, there was plenty of ornate silverware for the banquet table, including hundreds of forks and spoons, a large silver punch bowl, a gift from some jovial king or another, and aside from many less notable pieces, two elaborately crafted silver gilt loving cups—one from Henry VIII and the other from Charles II. These cups, including their covers and bases, are quite large and heavy, although the bowl would hold hardly more than half a pint of wine, which guests were likely expected to drink in one go when the tradition first began. Passing them down a long table of revelers involves a specific ceremony that I might describe later. In the meantime, if I could take the liberty, I would love to invite the reader to the official dinner table of his Worship, the Mayor, at a large English seaport where I spent several years.

The Mayor's dinner-parties occur as often as once a fortnight, and, inviting his guests by fifty or sixty at a time, his Worship probably assembles at his board most of the eminent citizens and distinguished personages of the town and neighborhood more than once during his year's incumbency, and very much, no doubt, to the promotion of good feeling among individuals of opposite parties and diverse pursuits in life. A miscellaneous party of Englishmen can always find more comfortable ground to meet upon than as many Americans, their differences of opinion being incomparably less radical than ours, and it being the sincerest wish of all their hearts, whether they call themselves Liberals or what not, that nothing in this world shall ever be greatly altered from what it has been and is. Thus there is seldom such a virulence of political hostility that it may not be dissolved in a glass or two of wine, without making the good liquor any more dry or bitter than accords with English taste.

The Mayor hosts dinner parties about every two weeks, inviting fifty or sixty guests at a time. His Worship probably brings together most of the notable citizens and distinguished personalities from the town and surrounding area more than once during his year in office, which likely helps foster good relations among people from opposing parties and different walks of life. A diverse group of Englishmen can always find more common ground to connect on than a similar number of Americans, as their differences in opinion are significantly less extreme than ours. It’s the genuine desire of everyone, whether they identify as Liberals or something else, that nothing in the world changes drastically from how it has been and is now. As a result, there’s rarely such intense political hostility that it can’t be eased with a glass or two of wine, without making the good drink any drier or bitterer than what suits English taste.

The first dinner of this kind at which I had the honor to be present took place during assize-time, and included among the guests the judges and the prominent members of the bar. Reaching the Town Hall at seven o'clock, I communicated my name to one of several splendidly dressed footmen, and he repeated it to another on the first staircase, by whom it was passed to a third, and thence to a fourth at the door of the reception-room, losing all resemblance to the original sound in the course of these transmissions; so that I had the advantage of making my entrance in the character of a stranger, not only to the whole company, but to myself as well. His Worship, however, kindly recognized me, and put me on speaking-terms with two or three gentlemen, whom I found very affable, and all the more hospitably attentive on the score of my nationality. It is very singular how kind an Englishman will almost invariably be to an individual American, without ever bating a jot of his prejudice against the American character in the lump. My new acquaintances took evident pains to put me at my ease; and, in requital of their good-nature, I soon began to look round at the general company in a critical spirit, making my crude observations apart, and drawing silent inferences, of the correctness of which I should not have been half so well satisfied a year afterwards as at that moment.

The first dinner of this kind that I got to attend took place during the assizes and included judges and prominent lawyers among the guests. Arriving at the Town Hall at seven o'clock, I told my name to one of the elegantly dressed footmen, who passed it to another on the first staircase, then to a third, and finally to a fourth at the entrance of the reception room. By the time it reached them, it had completely lost its original form, making my entrance feel like that of a stranger, not just to the entire company, but to myself as well. Thankfully, the host recognized me and introduced me to a couple of gentlemen, who were very friendly, especially given my nationality. It’s interesting how nice an Englishman typically is to a single American, even while holding onto his general biases against Americans as a whole. My new friends worked hard to make me feel comfortable, and in return for their kindness, I started to observe the overall crowd with a more critical eye, making my own unrefined judgments and silently drawing conclusions, which I wouldn't have been as confident about a year later as I was at that moment.

There were two judges present, a good many lawyers, and a few officers of the army in uniform. The other guests seemed to be principally of the mercantile class, and among them was a ship-owner from Nova Scotia, with whom I coalesced a little, inasmuch as we were born with the same sky over our heads, and an unbroken continuity of soil between his abode and mine. There was one old gentleman, whose character I never made out, with powdered hair, clad in black breeches and silk stockings, and wearing a rapier at his side; otherwise, with the exception of the military uniforms, there was little or no pretence of official costume. It being the first considerable assemblage of Englishmen that I had seen, my honest impression about then was, that they were a heavy and homely set of people, with a remarkable roughness of aspect and behavior, not repulsive, but beneath which it required more familiarity with the national character than I then possessed always to detect the good breeding of a gentleman. Being generally middle-aged, or still further advanced, they were by no means graceful in figure; for the comeliness of the youthful Englishman rapidly diminishes with years, his body appearing to grow longer, his legs to abbreviate themselves, and his stomach to assume the dignified prominence which justly belongs to that metropolis of his system. His face (what with the acridity of the atmosphere, ale at lunch, wine at dinner, and a well-digested abundance of succulent food) gets red and mottled, and develops at least one additional chin, with a promise of more; so that, finally, a stranger recognizes his animal part at the most superficial glance, but must take time and a little pains to discover the intellectual. Comparing him with an American, I really thought that our national paleness and lean habit of flesh gave us greatly the advantage in an aesthetic point of view. It seemed to me, moreover, that the English tailor had not done so much as he might and ought for these heavy figures, but had gone on wilfully exaggerating their uncouthness by the roominess of their garments; he had evidently no idea of accuracy of fit, and smartness was entirely out of his line. But, to be quite open with the reader, I afterwards learned to think that this aforesaid tailor has a deeper art than his brethren among ourselves, knowing how to dress his customers with such individual propriety that they look as if they were born in their clothes, the fit being to the character rather than the form. If you make an Englishman smart (unless he be a very exceptional one, of whom I have seen a few), you make him a monster; his best aspect is that of ponderous respectability.

There were two judges present, quite a few lawyers, and a few army officers in uniform. The other guests seemed mainly to be from the business community, including a ship owner from Nova Scotia, with whom I connected a bit since we shared the same sky and had an unbroken stretch of land between our homes. There was one older gentleman whose character I couldn’t quite figure out; he had powdered hair, wore black trousers and silk stockings, and carried a rapier at his side. Other than the military uniforms, there wasn’t much in the way of formal attire. Since this was the first large gathering of Englishmen I had seen, my honest impression at the time was that they seemed like a rather ordinary and rough group, not unappealing, but it took more familiarity with their national character than I had to always recognize the good breeding of a gentleman. Being mostly middle-aged or older, they weren’t particularly graceful in build; the youthful Englishman’s attractiveness quickly fades with age, his body seeming to grow longer, his legs seeming to shorten, and his stomach acquiring the noticeable prominence that is fitting for that part of his physique. His face, thanks to the sharp air, ale at lunch, wine at dinner, and a well-rounded diet, often becomes red and blotchy, developing at least one extra chin with the prospect of more. As a result, a stranger can easily spot his animal side at a glance but needs time and effort to uncover his intellect. Comparing him to an American, I honestly thought our national pale complexion and slimmer build gave us a significant advantage aesthetically. Additionally, it seemed to me that the English tailor hadn't done as much as he could have for these heavy figures, intentionally exaggerating their awkwardness with loose-fitting clothes; he clearly had no sense of accurate fitting, and sophistication was entirely out of his reach. However, to be completely honest with you, I later came to appreciate that this tailor possessed a deeper skill than his counterparts here, knowing how to dress his clients in a way that felt natural, with a fit that suited their character rather than just their form. If you try to make an Englishman look sharp (unless he’s an exceptional case, of which I’ve seen a few), you turn him into a spectacle; his most favorable appearance is one of solid respectability.

To make an end of these first impressions, I fancied that not merely the Suffolk bar, but the bar of any inland county in New England, might show a set of thin-visaged men, looking wretchedly worn, sallow, deeply wrinkled across the forehead, and grimly furrowed about the mouth, with whom these heavy-checked English lawyers, slow-paced and fat-witted as they must needs be, would stand very little chance in a professional contest. How that matter might turn out, I am unqualified to decide. But I state these results of my earliest glimpses at Englishmen, not for what they are worth, but because I ultimately gave them up as worth little or nothing. In course of time, I came to the conclusion that Englishmen of all ages are a rather good-looking people, dress in admirable taste from their own point of view, and, under a surface never silken to the touch, have a refinement of manners too thorough and genuine to be thought of as a separate endowment,—that is to say, if the individual himself be a man of station, and has had gentlemen for his father and grandfather. The sturdy Anglo-Saxon nature does not refine itself short of the third generation. The tradesmen, too, and all other classes, have their own proprieties. The only value of my criticisms, therefore, lay in their exemplifying the proneness of a traveller to measure one people by the distinctive characteristics of another,—as English writers invariably measure us, and take upon themselves to be disgusted accordingly, instead of trying to find out some principle of beauty with which we may be in conformity.

To wrap up my initial thoughts, I imagined that not just the Suffolk bar but also the legal scene in any inland county in New England might display a group of thin-faced men who looked incredibly worn out, pale, deeply wrinkled across the forehead, and grimly lined around the mouth. These guys would stand almost no chance against the heavy-set English lawyers, who are slow and less sharp. How that comparison would play out, I can’t say for sure. But I share these impressions of my first encounters with English men not for their significance, but because I eventually dismissed them as having little or no value. Over time, I concluded that English men of all ages are generally quite good-looking, have a nice sense of style from their own perspective, and beneath a surface that isn't soft to the touch, they possess a level of manners that is too deep and genuine to be seen as just an acquired trait—provided that the individual is someone of status and has had gentlemen for his father and grandfather. The strong Anglo-Saxon character doesn't truly refine itself until at least the third generation. The tradespeople and others also have their own sets of standards. Thus, the only value in my observations lies in illustrating how travelers tend to judge one culture based on the unique traits of another—just as English writers often judge us and express their disapproval without trying to understand the beauty standards we might share.

In due time we were summoned to the table, and went thither in no solemn procession, but with a good deal of jostling, thrusting behind, and scrambling for places when we reached our destination. The legal gentlemen, I suspect, were responsible for this indecorous zeal, which I never afterwards remarked in a similar party. The dining-hall was of noble size, and, like the other rooms of the suite, was gorgeously painted and gilded and brilliantly illuminated. There was a splendid table-service, and a noble array of footmen, some of them in plain clothes, and others wearing the town-livery, richly decorated with gold-lace, and themselves excellent specimens of the blooming young manhood of Britain. When we were fairly seated, it was certainly an agreeable spectacle to look up and down the long vista of earnest faces, and behold them so resolute, so conscious that there was an important business in hand, and so determined to be equal to the occasion. Indeed, Englishman or not, I hardly know what can be prettier than a snow-white table-cloth, a huge heap of flowers as a central decoration, bright silver, rich china, crystal glasses, decanters of Sherry at due intervals, a French roll and an artistically folded napkin at each plate, all that airy portion of a banquet, in short, that comes before the first mouthful, the whole illuminated by a blaze of artificial light, without which a dinner of made-dishes looks spectral, and the simplest viands are the best. Printed bills-of-fare were distributed, representing an abundant feast, no part of which appeared on the table until called for in separate plates. I have entirely forgotten what it was, but deem it no great matter, inasmuch as there is a pervading commonplace and identicalness in the composition of extensive dinners, on account of the impossibility of supplying a hundred guests with anything particularly delicate or rare. It was suggested to me that certain juicy old gentlemen had a private understanding what to call for, and that it would be good policy in a stranger to follow in their footsteps through the feast. I did not care to do so, however, because, like Sancho Panza's dip out of Camacho's caldron, any sort of pot-luck at such a table would be sure to suit my purpose; so I chose a dish or two on my own judgment, and, getting through my labors betimes, had great pleasure in seeing the Englishmen toil onward to the end.

In due time, we were called to the table, and we arrived not in a formal line, but with a lot of shoving, pushing, and scrambling for seats when we got there. I suspect the lawyers were to blame for this unruly enthusiasm, which I never noticed at a similar gathering again. The dining hall was impressively large, and like the other rooms in the suite, it was beautifully painted, gilded, and brightly lit. The table setting was splendid, along with a fine group of waitstaff—some dressed casually and others in town livery, richly adorned with gold lace, all looking like striking examples of young British manhood. Once we were seated, it was a pleasant sight to look down the long line of serious faces, seeing how determined everyone was, fully aware there was important business at hand and eager to rise to the occasion. Honestly, whether English or not, I don't think anything can be more beautiful than a crisp white tablecloth, a large arrangement of flowers as the centerpiece, shiny silverware, fine china, crystal glasses, decanters of sherry placed at intervals, a French roll, and an artistically folded napkin at each plate—basically, all the elegant details that make up the pre-meal presentation, which is illuminated by a bright array of lights; otherwise, a dinner of ready-made dishes looks ghostly, and even the simplest food seems the best. Printed menus were handed out, showing a lavish feast, but no part of it appeared on the table until it was requested in separate servings. I've completely forgotten what it was, but I don’t think it matters much since there is a general sameness in the composition of large dinners, due to the challenge of serving a hundred guests anything particularly unique or special. I was told that some seasoned gentlemen had a private system for what to order, and that it would be wise for a newcomer to follow their lead during the meal. However, I wasn’t keen on that because, like Sancho Panza's taste from Camacho's pot, any sort of food at such a gathering would surely satisfy my needs; so I picked a dish or two based on my own judgment and, finishing my meal in good time, took great pleasure in watching the Englishmen work their way through to the end.

They drank rather copiously, too, though wisely; for I observed that they seldom took Hock, and let the Champagne bubble slowly away out of the goblet, solacing themselves with Sherry, but tasting it warily before bestowing their final confidence. Their taste in wines, however, did not seem so exquisite, and certainly was not so various, as that to which many Americans pretend. This foppery of an intimate acquaintance with rare vintages does not suit a sensible Englishman, as he is very much in earnest about his wines, and adopts one or two as his lifelong friends, seldom exchanging them for any Delilahs of a moment, and reaping the reward of his constancy in an unimpaired stomach, and only so much gout as he deems wholesome and desirable. Knowing well the measure of his powers, he is not apt to fill his glass too often. Society, indeed, would hardly tolerate habitual imprudences of that kind, though, in my opinion, the Englishmen now upon the stage could carry off their three bottles, at need, with as steady a gait as any of their forefathers. It is not so very long since the three-bottle heroes sank finally under the table. It may be (at least, I should be glad if it were true) that there was an occult sympathy between our temperance reform, now somewhat in abeyance, and the almost simultaneous disappearance of hard-drinking among the respectable classes in England. I remember a middle-aged gentleman telling me (in illustration of the very slight importance attached to breaches of temperance within the memory of men not yet old) that he had seen a certain magistrate, Sir John Linkwater, or Drinkwater,—but I think the jolly old knight could hardly have staggered under so perverse a misnomer as this last,—while sitting on the magisterial bench, pull out a crown-piece and hand it to the clerk. "Mr. Clerk," said Sir John, as if it were the most indifferent fact in the world, "I was drunk last night. There are my five shillings."

They drank quite a bit, but wisely; I noticed they rarely chose Hock, letting the Champagne slowly fade in their glasses, and preferred Sherry, though they sipped it carefully before fully committing. Their wine preferences didn't seem as refined or diverse as what many Americans claim to have. This notion of being well-acquainted with rare vintages doesn't fit a sensible Englishman, who takes his wine seriously, sticking with one or two favorites for life, rarely swapping them for fleeting temptations, and enjoying the benefits of his loyalty with a healthy stomach and just enough gout that he considers fitting. Knowing his limits, he’s not likely to fill his glass too often. Society wouldn't really tolerate repeated foolishness of that sort, although I believe today’s Englishmen could handle their three bottles just as steadily as their ancestors. It wasn't that long ago that the three-bottle drinkers finally collapsed under the table. Maybe—it would make me happy if it were true—there's a hidden connection between our current temperance movement, which has slowed down, and the almost simultaneous decline of heavy drinking among the respectable classes in England. I remember a middle-aged man telling me (to illustrate how little importance was attached to breaches of temperance within the memory of those not yet old) about a certain magistrate, Sir John Linkwater, or Drinkwater—but I doubt the jolly old knight could have deserved such a ridiculous name as the latter—who, while sitting on the magistrate's bench, pulled out a crown coin and handed it to the clerk. "Mr. Clerk," said Sir John, as if it were the most casual thing in the world, "I was drunk last night. Here’s my five shillings."

During the dinner, I had a good deal of pleasant conversation with the gentlemen on either side of me. One of them, a lawyer, expatiated with great unction on the social standing of the judges. Representing the dignity and authority of the Crown, they take precedence, during assize-time, of the highest military men in the kingdom, of the Lord-Lieutenant of the county, of the Archbishops, of the royal Dukes, and even of the Prince of Wales. For the nonce, they are the greatest men in England. With a glow of professional complacency that amounted to enthusiasm, my friend assured me, that, in case of a royal dinner, a judge, if actually holding an assize, would be expected to offer his arm and take the Queen herself to the table. Happening to be in company with some of these elevated personages, on subsequent occasions, it appeared to me that the judges are fully conscious of their paramount claims to respect, and take rather more pains to impress them on their ceremonial inferiors than men of high hereditary rank are apt to do. Bishops, if it be not irreverent to say so, are sometimes marked by a similar characteristic. Dignified position is so sweet to an Englishman, that he needs to be born in it, and to feel it thoroughly incorporated with his nature from its original germ, in order to keep him from flaunting it obtrusively in the faces of innocent bystanders.

During dinner, I had a nice chat with the guys sitting next to me. One of them, a lawyer, went on at length about the social status of judges. Representing the dignity and authority of the Crown, they take precedence over the highest military officials in the kingdom, the Lord-Lieutenant of the county, Archbishops, royal Dukes, and even the Prince of Wales during assize time. For the moment, they are the most important people in England. With a proud sense of professionalism that could only be described as enthusiasm, my friend assured me that at a royal dinner, if a judge is actually holding an assize, he would be expected to offer his arm and escort the Queen to the table. When I found myself in the company of some of these high-ranking individuals on later occasions, it seemed to me that the judges are very aware of their need for respect and do a bit more to assert this over their ceremonial inferiors than those with inherited titles usually do. Bishops, if it's not too irreverent to say so, sometimes share this trait. Dignity is so appealing to an Englishman that he needs to be born into it and have it deeply ingrained in him from the very beginning to keep him from showing it off too blatantly in front of others.

My companion on the other side was a thick-set, middle-aged man, uncouth in manners, and ugly where none were handsome, with a dark, roughly hewn visage, that looked grim in repose, and secured to hold within itself the machinery of a very terrific frown. He ate with resolute appetite, and let slip few opportunities of imbibing whatever liquids happened to be passing by. I was meditating in what way this grisly featured table-fellow might most safely be accosted, when he turned to me with a surly sort of kindness, and invited me to take a glass of wine. We then began a conversation that abounded, on his part, with sturdy sense, and, somehow or other, brought me closer to him than I had yet stood to an Englishman. I should hardly have taken him to be an educated man, certainly not a scholar of accurate training; and yet he seemed to have all the resources of education and trained intellectual power at command. My fresh Americanism, and watchful observation of English characteristics, appeared either to interest or amuse him, or perhaps both. Under the mollifying influences of abundance of meat and drink, he grew very gracious (not that I ought to use such a phrase to describe his evidently genuine good-will), and by and by expressed a wish for further acquaintance, asking me to call at his rooms in London and inquire for Sergeant Wilkins,—throwing out the name forcibly, as if he had no occasion to be ashamed of it. I remembered Dean Swift's retort to Sergeant Bettesworth on a similar announcement,—"Of what regiment, pray, sir?"—and fancied that the same question might not have been quite amiss, if applied to the rugged individual at my side. But I heard of him subsequently as one of the prominent men at the English bar, a rough customer, and a terribly strong champion in criminal cases; and it caused me more regret than might have been expected, on so slight an acquaintanceship, when, not long afterwards, I saw his death announced in the newspapers. Not rich in attractive qualities, he possessed, I think, the most attractive one of all,—thorough manhood.

My companion across the table was a stocky, middle-aged man, awkward in his manners and not good-looking among a crowd of handsome individuals. He had a dark, rugged face that looked serious when still and was capable of a really intimidating frown. He ate with a hearty appetite and took every chance to drink whatever beverages were on hand. I was pondering how to approach this grim-faced dining partner when he turned to me with a gruff sort of kindness and invited me to join him for a glass of wine. We started a conversation that, on his part, was full of solid ideas and somehow brought me closer to him than I’d felt with any other Englishman. I wouldn’t have guessed he was an educated man, certainly not one with formal training, yet he seemed to draw on a wealth of knowledge and intellectual skills. My fresh American perspective and keen observations of English traits seemed to either intrigue or amuse him, or maybe both. After indulging in plenty of food and drink, he became quite friendly (though I shouldn't use that term too lightly for his authentic goodwill) and eventually expressed a desire to get to know me better. He invited me to visit him at his place in London and ask for Sergeant Wilkins—mentioning the name with emphasis, as if he had no reason to be embarrassed by it. I recalled Dean Swift’s witty comeback to Sergeant Bettesworth regarding a similar introduction—“Of what regiment, pray, sir?”—and thought that the same question might have been just as relevant if directed at the rugged man beside me. But later, I learned he was one of the leading figures at the English bar, known as a tough character and a fiercely strong advocate in criminal cases. It surprised me with a sense of loss, more than I would have expected from such a brief acquaintance, when I saw his death reported in the newspapers not long after. Not particularly endowed with charming qualities, he possessed, I believe, the most appealing trait of all—absolute manhood.

After the cloth was removed, a goodly group of decanters were set before the Mayor, who sent them forth on their outward voyage, full freighted with Port, Sherry, Madeira, and Claret, of which excellent liquors, methought, the latter found least acceptance among the guests. When every man had filled his glass, his Worship stood up and proposed a toast. It was, of course, "Our gracious Sovereign," or words to that effect; and immediately a band of musicians, whose preliminary footings and thrummings I had already heard behind me, struck up "God save the Queen," and the whole company rose with one impulse to assist in singing that famous national anthem. It was the first time in my life that I had ever seen a body of men, or even a single man, under the active influence of the sentiment of Loyalty; for, though we call ourselves loyal to our country and institutions, and prove it by our readiness to shed blood and sacrifice life in their behalf, still the principle is as cold and hard, in an American bosom, as the steel spring that puts in motion a powerful machinery. In the Englishman's system, a force similar to that of our steel spring is generated by the warm throbbings of human hearts. He clothes our bare abstraction in flesh and blood,—at present, in the flesh and blood of a woman,—and manages to combine love, awe, and intellectual reverence, all in one emotion, and to embody his mother, his wife, his children, the whole idea of kindred, in a single person, and make her the representative of his country and its laws. We Americans smile superior, as I did at the Mayor's table; and yet, I fancy, we lose some very agreeable titillations of the heart in consequence of our proud prerogative of caring no more about our President than for a man of straw, or a stuffed scarecrow straddling in a cornfield.

After the cloth was taken away, a nice collection of decanters was placed in front of the Mayor, who sent them off on their journey, filled with Port, Sherry, Madeira, and Claret. Of these fine drinks, I thought the Claret was the least popular among the guests. Once everyone had filled their glasses, the Mayor stood up and proposed a toast. It was, of course, "Our gracious Sovereign," or something along those lines; and immediately a group of musicians, whose preliminary tunes I had already heard behind me, began playing "God Save the Queen," and the entire company rose as one to join in singing that famous national anthem. It was the first time in my life that I had ever seen a group of men, or even just one man, genuinely filled with the sentiment of Loyalty; for, while we call ourselves loyal to our country and its institutions, and demonstrate that by being willing to shed blood and sacrifice our lives for them, the principle still feels as cold and rigid in an American heart as the steel spring that powers heavy machinery. In an Englishman's system, a similar force to our steel spring is generated by the warm beating of human hearts. He gives our abstract concepts a physical presence—right now, in the form of a woman—and manages to blend love, awe, and intellectual respect all into one feeling, embodying his mother, his wife, his children, and the whole idea of family in a single person, who becomes the representative of his country and its laws. We Americans smirk with superiority, just as I did at the Mayor's table; yet, I suspect we miss out on some very pleasant feelings because of our proud stance of being indifferent to our President, treating him like a mere figure or a stuffed scarecrow in a cornfield.

But, to say the truth, the spectacle struck me rather ludicrously, to see this party of stout middle-aged and elderly gentlemen, in the fulness of meat and drink, their ample and ruddy faces glistening with wine, perspiration, and enthusiasm, rumbling out those strange old stanzas from the very bottom of their hearts and stomachs, which two organs, in the English interior arrangement, lie closer together than in ours. The song seemed to me the rudest old ditty in the world; but I could not wonder at its universal acceptance and indestructible popularity, considering how inimitably it expresses the national faith and feeling as regards the inevitable righteousness of England, the Almighty's consequent respect and partiality for that redoubtable little island, and his presumed readiness to strengthen its defence against the contumacious wickedness and knavery of all other principalities or republics. Tennyson himself, though evidently English to the very last prejudice, could not write half so good a song for the purpose. Finding that the entire dinner-table struck in, with voices of every pitch between rolling thunder and the squeak of a cart-wheel, and that the strain was not of such delicacy as to be much hurt by the harshest of them, I determined to lend my own assistance in swelling the triumphant roar. It seemed but a proper courtesy to the first Lady in the land, whose guest, in the largest sense, I might consider myself. Accordingly, my first tuneful efforts (and probably my last, for I purpose not to sing any more, unless it he "Hail Columbia" on the restoration of the Union) were poured freely forth in honor of Queen Victoria. The Sergeant smiled like the carved head of a Swiss nutcracker, and the other gentlemen in my neighborhood, by nods and gestures, evinced grave approbation of so suitable a tribute to English superiority; and we finished our stave and sat down in an extremely happy frame of mind.

But honestly, the scene struck me as pretty ridiculous. There was this group of sturdy middle-aged and older gentlemen, enjoying their food and drink, with their full, red faces shining from wine, sweat, and enthusiasm, belting out those strange old lyrics from deep in their hearts and stomachs, which, in the way English people are built, are closer together than in ours. The song seemed to me to be the rudest old tune in the world; yet, I wasn't surprised by its widespread acceptance and lasting popularity, considering how perfectly it captures the national belief and sentiment regarding England's undeniable righteousness, the respect and favoritism the Almighty has for that formidable little island, and His supposed willingness to bolster its defense against the rebellious wickedness and deceit of all other nations or republics. Tennyson himself, despite being thoroughly English to the core, couldn't write a song half as good for that purpose. Seeing that the entire dinner table joined in, with voices ranging from booming thunder to the squeak of a cartwheel, and that the song was robust enough not to be hurt by the loudest voices, I decided to contribute my own voice to the triumphant chorus. It felt like a fitting gesture to the foremost Lady in the land, whose guest I might consider myself in a broad sense. So, my first and probably last attempt at singing (since I don't plan to sing again unless it’s "Hail Columbia" when the Union is restored) was dedicated to Queen Victoria. The Sergeant smiled like a carved Swiss nutcracker, and the other gentlemen nearby nodded and gestured in approval of such a fitting tribute to English greatness; we finished our song and sat down feeling extremely happy.

Other toasts followed in honor of the great institutions and interests of the country, and speeches in response to each were made by individuals whom the Mayor designated or the company called for. None of them impressed me with a very high idea of English postprandial oratory. It is inconceivable, indeed, what ragged and shapeless utterances most Englishmen are satisfied to give vent to, without attempting anything like artistic shape, but clapping on a patch here and another there, and ultimately getting out what they want to say, and generally with a result of sufficiently good sense, but in some such disorganized mass as if they had thrown it up rather than spoken it. It seemed to me that this was almost as much by choice as necessity. An Englishman, ambitious of public favor, should not be too smooth. If an orator is glib, his countrymen distrust him. They dislike smartness. The stronger and heavier his thoughts, the better, provided there be an element of commonplace running through them; and any rough, yet never vulgar force of expression, such as would knock an opponent down, if it hit him, only it must not be too personal, is altogether to their taste; but a studied neatness of language, or other such superficial graces, they cannot abide. They do not often permit a man to make himself a fine orator of malice aforethought, that is, unless he be a nobleman (as, for example, Lord Stanley, of the Derby family), who, as an hereditary legislator and necessarily a public speaker, is bound to remedy a poor natural delivery in the best way he can. On the whole, I partly agree with them, and, if I cared for any oratory whatever, should be as likely to applaud theirs as our own. When an English speaker sits down, you feel that you have been listening to a real man, and not to an actor; his sentiments have a wholesome earth-smell in them, though, very likely, this apparent naturalness is as much an art as what we expend in rounding a sentence or elaborating a peroration.

Other toasts followed to honor the great institutions and interests of the country, and speeches in response to each were made by individuals designated by the Mayor or called upon by the group. None of them gave me a very high opinion of English after-dinner speeches. It’s hard to believe what rough and unstructured statements most English people are content to express, without trying to create anything artistic, just patching bits together and eventually getting out their message, usually with a pretty good point, but in a messy way as if they just threw it together instead of saying it. It seemed to me that this was almost a choice as much as a necessity. An Englishman aiming for public approval shouldn’t be too polished. If a speaker is too smooth, his fellow countrymen become suspicious of him. They don’t like cleverness. The stronger and deeper his thoughts, the better, as long as there’s some element of the ordinary in them; and any rough, yet never vulgar, forceful expression—something that would knock down an opponent if it landed, as long as it’s not too personal—is exactly what they prefer; but they can’t stand overly neat language or other superficial graces. They don’t often allow someone to become a skillful orator intentionally, unless he’s a nobleman (for example, Lord Stanley from the Derby family), who, as an hereditary legislator and necessary public speaker, has to compensate for a poor natural delivery as best as he can. Overall, I partly agree with them, and if I cared about any type of oratory, I would likely applaud theirs as much as our own. When an English speaker finishes, you feel like you’ve been listening to a real person, not an actor; his sentiments have a genuine, earthy quality, although, very likely, this apparent naturalness is just as much of a crafted effort as the work we put into polishing a sentence or developing a conclusion.

It is one good effect of this inartificial style, that nobody in England seems to feel any shyness about shovelling the untrimmed and untrimmable ideas out of his mind for the benefit of an audience. At least, nobody did on the occasion now in hand, except a poor little Major of Artillery, who responded for the Army in a thin, quavering voice, with a terribly hesitating trickle of fragmentary ideas, and, I question not, would rather have been bayoneted in front of his batteries than to have said a word. Not his own mouth, but the cannon's, was this poor Major's proper organ of utterance.

One positive aspect of this simple style is that no one in England seems to feel awkward about sharing their raw and unfiltered thoughts for an audience. At least, that was the case during the event in question, except for a poor little Major of Artillery, who spoke on behalf of the Army in a weak, trembling voice, struggling with a stream of disjointed ideas. I wouldn't be surprised if he would rather have faced a bayonet in front of his batteries than say a word. For this unfortunate Major, the cannon was his true voice, not his own mouth.

While I was thus amiably occupied in criticising my fellow-guests, the Mayor had got up to propose another toast; and listening rather inattentively to the first sentence or two, I soon became sensible of a drift in his Worship's remarks that made me glance apprehensively towards Sergeant Wilkins. "Yes," grumbled that gruff personage, shoving a decanter of Port towards me, "it is your turn next"; and seeing in my face, I suppose, the consternation of a wholly unpractised orator, he kindly added, "It is nothing. A mere acknowledgment will answer the purpose. The less you say, the better they will like it." That being the case, I suggested that perhaps they would like it best if I said nothing at all. But the Sergeant shook his head. Now, on first receiving the Mayor's invitation to dinner, it had occurred to me that I might possibly be brought into my present predicament; but I had dismissed the idea from my mind as too disagreeable to be entertained, and, moreover, as so alien from my disposition and character that Fate surely could not keep such a misfortune in store for me. If nothing else prevented, an earthquake or the crack of doom would certainly interfere before I need rise to speak. Yet here was the Mayor getting on inexorably,—and, indeed, I heartily wished that he might get on and on forever, and of his wordy wanderings find no end.

While I was busy critiquing my fellow guests, the Mayor stood up to propose another toast. As I listened somewhat distractedly to the first couple of sentences, I soon picked up on a tone in his remarks that made me glance nervously at Sergeant Wilkins. "Yes," grumbled the gruff man, pushing a decanter of Port towards me, "it’s your turn next." Seeing, I suppose, the panic of someone who has never spoken in public, he kindly added, "It’s nothing. A simple acknowledgment will do. The less you say, the more they’ll appreciate it." Given that, I suggested that maybe they would prefer it if I said nothing at all. But the Sergeant shook his head. When I first received the Mayor's invitation to dinner, I thought I might end up in this exact situation; however, I dismissed the notion as too unpleasant to consider, and also as so far from my nature that surely Fate wouldn’t allow such a misfortune to happen to me. Surely, something—an earthquake or the end of the world—would intervene before I had to stand up to speak. Yet here was the Mayor going on relentlessly—and honestly, I hoped he would keep going forever, with no end to his lengthy chatter.

If the gentle reader, my kindest friend and closest confidant, deigns to desire it, I can impart to him my own experience as a public speaker quite as indifferently as if it concerned another person. Indeed, it does concern another, or a mere spectral phenomenon, for it was not I, in my proper and natural self, that sat there at table or subsequently rose to speak. At the moment, then, if the choice had been offered me whether the Mayor should let off a speech at my head or a pistol, I should unhesitatingly have taken the latter alternative. I had really nothing to say, not an idea in my head, nor, which was a great deal worse, any flowing words or embroidered sentences in which to dress out that empty Nothing, and give it a cunning aspect of intelligence, such as might last the poor vacuity the little time it had to live. But time pressed; the Mayor brought his remarks, affectionately eulogistic of the United States and highly complimentary to their distinguished representative at that table, to a close, amid a vast deal of cheering; and the band struck up "Hail Columbia," I believe, though it might have been "Old Hundred," or "God save the Queen" over again, for anything that I should have known or cared. When the music ceased, there was an intensely disagreeable instant, during which I seemed to rend away and fling off the habit of a lifetime, and rose, still void of ideas, but with preternatural composure, to make a speech. The guests rattled on the table, and cried, "Hear!" most vociferously, as if now, at length, in this foolish and idly garrulous world, had come the long-expected moment when one golden word was to be spoken; and in that imminent crisis, I caught a glimpse of a little bit of an effusion of international sentiment, which it might, and must, and should do to utter.

If my dear reader, my closest friend and confidant, wants it, I can share my experience as a public speaker as casually as if it were about someone else. In fact, it does concern someone else, or more like a faint memory, because it wasn't really me, in my true self, who sat at that table and later stood up to speak. At that moment, had I been given the choice between the Mayor delivering a speech or firing a gun at me, I would have chosen the latter without hesitation. I genuinely had nothing to say, not a single thought in my mind, and even worse, no clever phrases or fancy sentences to dress up that empty Nothing and give it an appearance of intelligence that might last the brief time it had to exist. But time was running out; the Mayor wrapped up his remarks, filled with praise for the United States and generous compliments for their distinguished representative at that table, amid loud cheers; and I believe the band started playing "Hail Columbia," though it could have been "Old Hundred," or "God save the Queen" again for all I knew or cared. When the music stopped, there was a painfully awkward moment when it felt like I was tearing away from the habits of a lifetime, and I rose, still devoid of ideas, but with an unnatural calm, to give a speech. The guests pounded on the table and shouted, "Hear!" very loudly, as if, finally, in this silly and endlessly talkative world, the long-awaited moment was here when one brilliant word was to be spoken; and in that crucial moment, I caught a glimpse of a little spark of international sentiment that I felt needed to be expressed.

Well; it was nothing, as the Sergeant had said. What surprised me most, was the sound of my own voice, which I had never before heard at a declamatory pitch, and which impressed me as belonging to some other person, who, and not myself, would be responsible for the speech: a prodigious consolation and encouragement under the circumstances! I went on without the slightest embarrassment, and sat down amid great applause, wholly undeserved by anything that I had spoken, but well won from Englishmen, methought, by the new development of pluck that alone had enabled me to speak at all. "It was handsomely done!" quoth Sergeant Wilkins; and I felt like a recruit who had been for the first time under fire.

Well, it was nothing, as the Sergeant had said. What surprised me the most was the sound of my own voice, which I had never heard at such a loud pitch before, and it felt like it belonged to someone else, not me, who would actually be responsible for the speech: a huge relief and encouragement in that moment! I continued without any embarrassment and sat down to loud applause, which I definitely didn’t deserve for what I had said, but I thought it was well earned from the Englishmen for the courage it took just to speak at all. "That was well done!" said Sergeant Wilkins; and I felt like a recruit who had just been under fire for the first time.

I would gladly have ended my oratorical career then and there forever, but was often placed in a similar or worse position, and compelled to meet it as I best might; for this was one of the necessities of an office which I had voluntarily taken on my shoulders, and beneath which I might be crushed by no moral delinquency on my own part, but could not shirk without cowardice and shame. My subsequent fortune was various. Once, though I felt it to be a kind of imposture, I got a speech by heart, and doubtless it might have been a very pretty one, only I forgot every syllable at the moment of need, and had to improvise another as well as I could. I found it a better method to prearrange a few points in my mind, and trust to the spur of the occasion, and the kind aid of Providence, for enabling me to bring them to bear. The presence of any considerable proportion of personal friends generally dumbfounded me. I would rather have talked with an enemy in the gate. Invariably, too, I was much embarrassed by a small audience, and succeeded better with a large one,— the sympathy of a multitude possessing a buoyant effect, which lifts the speaker a little way out of his individuality and tosses him towards a perhaps better range of sentiment than his private one. Again, if I rose carelessly and confidently, with an expectation of going through the business entirely at my ease, I often found that I had little or nothing to say; whereas, if I came to the charge in perfect despair, and at a crisis when failure would have been horrible, it once or twice happened that the frightful emergency concentrated my poor faculties, and enabled me to give definite and vigorous expression to sentiments which an instant before looked as vague and far off as the clouds in the atmosphere. On the whole, poor as my own success may have been, I apprehend that any intelligent man with a tongue possesses the chief requisite of oratorical power, and may develop many of the others, if he deems it worth while to bestow a great amount of labor and pains on an object which the most accomplished orators, I suspect, have not found altogether satisfactory to their highest impulses. At any rate, it must be a remarkably true man who can keep his own elevated conception of truth when the lower feeling of a multitude is assailing his natural sympathies, and who can speak out frankly the best that there is in him, when by adulterating it a little, or a good deal, he knows that he may make it ten times as acceptable to the audience.

I would have been happy to end my speaking career right then and there, but I often found myself in similar or worse situations and had to handle them as best I could; this was one of the responsibilities I had willingly taken on, and I couldn't let myself be crushed by any moral failure on my part, nor could I avoid it without feeling cowardly and ashamed. My experiences varied. Once, even though I felt it was a bit of a fraud, I memorized a speech, and it might have been very nice, but I blanked on every word when it mattered and had to improvise another to the best of my ability. I found it worked better to outline a few points in my mind and rely on the moment and a bit of luck to help me make them relevant. The presence of a significant number of friends usually left me speechless. I would have preferred to speak to an enemy at the gate. I was also often more flustered by a small audience and performed better in front of a large crowd—the collective support of many people had a lifting effect that helped me step outside my own self and reach a better emotional state than my usual one. Conversely, if I stood up feeling relaxed and confident, expecting to handle everything easily, I often found I had little or nothing to say; while, if I approached the situation feeling completely hopeless, especially in a moment when failing would be disastrous, it sometimes happened that the intense situation focused my mind and allowed me to express thoughts that moments before felt as distant and indistinct as clouds in the sky. Overall, despite my own lack of success, I believe that any intelligent person with the ability to speak has the main requirement for being a good orator and can develop many other skills if they decide to dedicate significant effort to a goal that even the most skilled speakers often find less than fulfilling to their highest aspirations. At the very least, it must be an exceptionally genuine person who can maintain their own high standards of truth when faced with the lower emotions of a crowd that challenge their natural feelings, and who can openly express the best within them when they know that by diluting it somewhat, or significantly, they could make it ten times more appealing to the audience.

This slight article on the civic banquets of England would be too wretchedly imperfect, without an attempted description of a Lord Mayor's dinner at the Mansion House in London. I should have preferred the annual feast at Guildhall, but never had the good fortune to witness it. Once, however, I was honored with an invitation to one of the regular dinners, and gladly accepted it,—taking the precaution, nevertheless, though it hardly seemed necessary, to inform the City-King, through a mutual friend, that I was no fit representative of American eloquence, and must humbly make it a condition that I should not be expected to open my mouth, except for the reception of his Lordship's bountiful hospitality. The reply was gracious and acquiescent; so that I presented myself in the great entrance-hall of the Mansion House, at half past six o'clock, in a state of most enjoyable freedom from the pusillanimous apprehensions that often tormented me at such times. The Mansion House was built in Queen Anne's days, in the very heart of old London, and is a palace worthy of its inhabitant, were he really as great a man as his traditionary state and pomp would seem to indicate. Times are changed, however, since the days of Whittington, or even of Hogarth's Industrious Apprentice, to whom the highest imaginable reward of lifelong integrity was a seat in the Lord Mayor's chair. People nowadays say that the real dignity and importance have perished out of the office, as they do, sooner or later, out of all earthly institutions, leaving only a painted and gilded shell like that of an Easter egg, and that it is only second-rate and third-rate men who now condescend to be ambitious of the Mayoralty. I felt a little grieved at this; for the original emigrants of New England had strong sympathies with the people of London, who were mostly Puritans in religion and Parliamentarians in politics, in the early days of our country; so that the Lord Mayor was a potentate of huge dimensions in the estimation of our forefathers, and held to be hardly second to the prime minister of the throne. The true great men of the city now appear to have aims beyond city greatness, connecting themselves with national politics, and seeking to be identified with the aristocracy of the country.

This brief article on the civic banquets of England would be seriously lacking without a description of a Lord Mayor's dinner at the Mansion House in London. I would have preferred the annual feast at Guildhall, but I never had the chance to see it. Once, however, I was fortunate enough to receive an invitation to one of the regular dinners, and I happily accepted it—taking the precaution, even though it hardly seemed necessary, to inform the City-King, through a mutual friend, that I was not a suitable representative of American eloquence and needed to make it clear that I should only speak to enjoy his Lordship's generous hospitality. The response was gracious and agreeable, so I arrived at the grand entrance hall of the Mansion House at six-thirty, feeling quite relaxed and free from the nervous worries that often troubled me at such events. The Mansion House, built in the time of Queen Anne, is located in the heart of old London, and it is a palace deserving of its resident, if he truly lived up to the greatness suggested by his traditional status and pomp. Times have changed, however, since the days of Whittington or even Hogarth's Industrious Apprentice, for whom the highest reward for a lifetime of integrity was a seat in the Lord Mayor's chair. Nowadays, people claim that the true dignity and significance have vanished from the office, as they inevitably do from all earthly institutions, leaving behind only a decorated and gilded shell, like an Easter egg, and that it is only second-rate and third-rate individuals who aspire to the Mayoralty now. I felt a bit saddened by this; the original settlers of New England had strong connections to the people of London, who were mostly Puritans in religion and Parliamentarians in politics in the early days of our country, so the Lord Mayor was seen as a significant leader in the eyes of our ancestors, regarded as almost on par with the prime minister of the throne. The true influential figures of the city now seem to have ambitions that extend beyond local significance, linking themselves to national politics and striving to be associated with the country's aristocracy.

In the entrance-hall I was received by a body of footmen dressed in a livery of blue coats and buff breeches, in which they looked wonderfully like American Revolutionary generals, only bedizened with far more lace and embroidery than those simple and grand old heroes ever dreamed of wearing. There were likewise two very imposing figures, whom I should have taken to be military men of rank, being arrayed in scarlet coats and large silver epaulets; but they turned out to be officers of the Lord Mayor's household, and were now employed in assigning to the guests the places which they were respectively to occupy at the dinner-table. Our names (for I had included myself in a little group of friends) were announced; and ascending the staircase, we met his Lordship in the doorway of the first reception-room, where, also, we had the advantage of a presentation to the Lady Mayoress. As this distinguished couple retired into private life at the termination of their year of office, it is inadmissible to make any remarks, critical or laudatory, on the manners and bearing of two personages suddenly emerging from a position of respectable mediocrity into one of pre-eminent dignity within their own sphere. Such individuals almost always seem to grow nearly or quite to the full size of their office. If it were desirable to write an essay on the latent aptitude of ordinary people for grandeur, we have an exemplification in our own country, and on a scale incomparably greater than that of the Mayoralty, though invested with nothing like the outward magnificence that gilds and embroiders the latter. If I have been correctly informed, the Lord Mayor's salary is exactly double that of the President of the United States, and yet is found very inadequate to his necessary expenditure.

In the entrance hall, I was welcomed by a group of footmen dressed in blue coats and buff breeches, looking a lot like American Revolutionary generals, but with way more lace and embroidery than those simple old heroes ever imagined wearing. There were also two very impressive figures, whom I would have guessed were high-ranking military officers, dressed in scarlet coats and large silver epaulets; but they turned out to be officers from the Lord Mayor's household, assigned to show the guests to their seats at the dinner table. Our names (since I had included myself with a small group of friends) were announced, and as we climbed the staircase, we met his Lordship at the doorway of the first reception room, where we also had the chance to be introduced to the Lady Mayoress. Since this distinguished couple retired into private life once their year in office ended, it’s not appropriate to make any comments, whether critical or complimentary, on the manners and demeanor of two people who suddenly moved from a position of respectable mediocrity to one of prominent dignity within their own realm. Such individuals tend to grow nearly or completely into the full stature of their role. If it were worth writing an essay about the hidden potential of ordinary people for greatness, we see an example in our own country, on a much larger scale than that of the Mayor's office, though lacking the outward grandeur that embellishes the latter. If I’ve been correctly informed, the Lord Mayor's salary is exactly double that of the President of the United States, yet it is still found to be quite inadequate for his necessary expenses.

There were two reception-rooms, thrown into one by the opening of wide folding-doors; and though in an old style, and not yet so old as to be venerable, they are remarkably handsome apartments, lofty as well as spacious, with carved ceilings and walls, and at either end a splendid fireplace of white marble, ornamented with sculptured wreaths of flowers and foliage. The company were about three hundred, many of them celebrities in politics, war, literature, and science, though I recollect none preeminently distinguished in either department. But it is certainly a pleasant mode of doing honor to men of literature, for example, who deserve well of the public, yet do not often meet it face to face, thus to bring them together under genial auspices, in connection with persons of note in other lines. I know not what may be the Lord Mayor's mode or principle of selecting his guests, nor whether, during his official term, he can proffer his hospitality to every man of noticeable talent in the wide world of London, nor, in fine, whether his Lordship's invitation is much sought for or valued; but it seemed to me that this periodical feast is one of the many sagacious methods which the English have contrived for keeping up a good understanding among different sorts of people. Like most other distinctions of society, however, I presume that the Lord Mayor's card does not often seek out modest merit, but comes at last when the recipient is conscious of the bore, and doubtful about the honor.

There were two reception rooms combined into one by wide folding doors; and although they were in an old style, not so old as to be considered ancient, they were impressively beautiful spaces, tall and spacious, with intricately carved ceilings and walls, and splendid white marble fireplaces at each end, decorated with sculpted floral and leafy designs. The guest list included around three hundred people, many of whom were notable figures in politics, military, literature, and science, though I couldn't recall anyone who stood out significantly in any particular field. However, it’s certainly a nice way to honor literary figures who contribute to society but don’t often interact directly with the public by bringing them together in a welcoming environment alongside prominent people from other areas. I’m unsure what criteria the Lord Mayor uses to choose his guests, nor whether he can invite every person of notable talent in the vast world of London during his term, or if his invitations are particularly sought after or appreciated; yet, this recurring event seems to be one of the many clever strategies the English have devised to foster good relationships among diverse groups. Like most other societal distinctions, though, I assume the Lord Mayor's invitation doesn’t often reach those who are modestly talented, but instead arrives when the recipient feels bored and uncertain about the honor.

One very pleasant characteristic, which I never met with at any other public or partially public dinner, was the presence of ladies. No doubt, they were principally the wives and daughters of city magnates; and if we may judge from the many sly allusions in old plays and satirical poems, the city of London has always been famous for the beauty of its women and the reciprocal attractions between them and the men of quality. Be that as it might, while straying hither and thither through those crowded apartments, I saw much reason for modifying certain heterodox opinions which I had imbibed, in my Transatlantic newness and rawness, as regarded the delicate character and frequent occurrence of English beauty. To state the entire truth (being, at this period, some years old in English life), my taste, I fear, had long since begun to be deteriorated by acquaintance with other models of feminine loveliness than it was my happiness to know in America. I often found, or seemed to find, if I may dare to confess it, in the persons of such of my dear countrywomen as I now occasionally met, a certain meagreness, (Heaven forbid that I should call it scrawniness!) a deficiency of physical development, a scantiness, so to speak, in the pattern of their material make, a paleness of complexion, a thinness of voice,—all of which characteristics, nevertheless, only made me resolve so much the more sturdily to uphold these fair creatures as angels, because I was sometimes driven to a half-acknowledgment, that the English ladies, looked at from a lower point of view, were perhaps a little finer animals than they. The advantages of the latter, if any they could really be said to have, were all comprised in a few additional lumps of clay on their shoulders and other parts of their figures. It would be a pitiful bargain to give up the ethereal charm of American beauty in exchange for half a hundred-weight of human clay!

One really nice thing I noticed that I hadn't seen at any other public or semi-public dinners was the presence of women. They were mostly the wives and daughters of prominent city figures, and if we go by all the subtle references in old plays and satirical poems, London has always been known for the beauty of its women and the mutual attraction between them and high-status men. Regardless, as I wandered through those packed rooms, I found plenty of reasons to rethink some of my unconventional opinions on the delicate nature and frequent appearance of English beauty, which I had picked up back when I was still fresh and inexperienced in the UK. To be completely honest (having spent several years in England now), my taste had probably started to slide due to my exposure to different ideals of feminine beauty that I had the pleasure of knowing back in America. I often noticed, or at least it seemed to me, if I can admit it, in the women I encountered from my home country, a certain thinness (God forbid I call it scrawniness!), a lack of physical development, a sort of scarcity in their build, a paleness of complexion, a high-pitched voice—all of which traits only made me more determined to uphold these lovely ladies as angels, because I sometimes had to partially acknowledge that, viewed from a different perspective, English women might be slightly finer creatures than them. Any benefits the latter had—if they could truly be considered benefits—were just a few extra pounds of flesh on their shoulders and other parts of their bodies. It would be a sad trade to give up the ethereal allure of American beauty for a heavy load of human flesh!

At a given signal we all found our way into an immense room, called the Egyptian Hall, I know not why, except that the architecture was classic, and as different as possible from the ponderous style of Memphis and the Pyramids. A powerful band played inspiringly as we entered, and a brilliant profusion of light shone down on two long tables, extending the whole length of the hall, and a cross-table between them, occupying nearly its entire breadth. Glass gleamed and silver glistened on an acre or two of snowy damask, over which were set out all the accompaniments of a stately feast. We found our places without much difficulty, and the Lord Mayor's chaplain implored a blessing on the food,—a ceremony which the English never omit, at a great dinner or a small one, yet consider, I fear, not so much a religious rite as a sort of preliminary relish before the soup.

At a given signal, we all made our way into a huge room called the Egyptian Hall. I’m not sure why it was named that, except that the architecture was classic and vastly different from the heavy style of Memphis and the Pyramids. A powerful band played inspiring music as we entered, and a dazzling array of lights illuminated two long tables stretching the entire length of the hall, with a cross table between them that took up almost all the width. Glass shone and silver sparkled across an area of snowy tablecloth, with all the items for a grand feast laid out. We found our seats without much trouble, and the Lord Mayor's chaplain prayed for a blessing on the food—a ritual the English never skip, whether at a large dinner or a small one, but I worry they see it more as a kind of appetizer before the soup than a religious ceremony.

The soup, of course, on this occasion, was turtle, of which, in accordance with immemorial custom, each guest was allowed two platefuls, in spite of the otherwise immitigable law of table-decorum. Indeed, judging from the proceedings of the gentlemen near me, I surmised that there was no practical limit, except the appetite of the guests and the capacity of the soup-tureens. Not being fond of this civic dainty, I partook of it but once, and then only in accordance with the wise maxim, always to taste a fruit, a wine, or a celebrated dish, at its indigenous site; and the very fountain-head of turtle-soup, I suppose, is in the Lord Mayor's dinner-pot. It is one of those orthodox customs which people follow for half a century without knowing why, to drink a sip of rum-punch, in a very small tumbler, after the soup. It was excellently well-brewed, and it seemed to me almost worth while to sup the soup for the sake of sipping the punch. The rest of the dinner was catalogued in a bill-of-fare printed on delicate white paper within an arabesque border of green and gold. It looked very good, not only in the English and French names of the numerous dishes, but also in the positive reality of the dishes themselves, which were all set on the table to be carved and distributed by the guests. This ancient and honest method is attended with a good deal of trouble, and a lavish effusion of gravy, yet by no means bestowed or dispensed in vain, because you have thereby the absolute assurance of a banquet actually before your eyes, instead of a shadowy promise in the bill-of-fare, and such meagre fulfilment as a single guest can contrive to get upon his individual plate. I wonder that Englishmen, who are fond of looking at prize-oxen in the shape of butcher's-meat, do not generally better estimate the aesthetic gormandism of devouring the whole dinner with their eyesight, before proceeding to nibble the comparatively few morsels which, after all, the most heroic appetite and widest stomachic capacity of mere mortals can enable even an alderman really to eat. There fell to my lot three delectable things enough, which I take pains to remember, that the reader may not go away wholly unsatisfied from the Barmecide feast to which I have bidden him,— a red mullet, a plate of mushrooms, exquisitely stewed, and part of a ptarmigan, a bird of the same family as the grouse, but feeding high up towards the summit of the Scotch mountains, whence it gets a wild delicacy of flavor very superior to that of the artificially nurtured English game-fowl. All the other dainties have vanished from my memory as completely as those of Prospero's banquet after Ariel had clapped his wings over it. The band played at intervals inspiriting us to new efforts, as did likewise the sparkling wines which the footmen supplied from an inexhaustible cellar, and which the guests quaffed with little apparent reference to the disagreeable fact that there comes a to-morrow morning after every feast. As long as that shall be the case, a prudent man can never have full enjoyment of his dinner.

The soup this time was turtle, and as per tradition, each guest was allowed two servings, even though table manners usually dictate otherwise. Honestly, based on what the guys around me were doing, I figured there was really no limit, except for how hungry the guests were and how much the soup tureens could hold. I’m not a fan of this delicacy, so I only tried it once, following the wise saying that you should always taste a fruit, a wine, or a famous dish where it originally comes from; and I guess the best place for turtle soup is in the Lord Mayor's pot. There’s this peculiar custom that people follow for decades without knowing why: after the soup, everyone has a small glass of rum punch. It was really well made, and honestly, it almost felt worth it to have the soup just to enjoy the punch. The rest of the dinner was listed on a menu printed on delicate white paper with a green and gold design around it. It looked great, not just from the fancy English and French names of the many dishes, but also in the actual dishes themselves, which were all laid out on the table to be carved and served by the guests. This old-fashioned and honest way involves a bit of hassle and spills a lot of gravy, but it definitely isn’t wasted because you get to see the banquet right in front of you, rather than just a vague promise on the menu, and the meager amount that one person can fit on their plate. I wonder why the English, who love to look at prize cattle in the form of meat, don’t appreciate the art of enjoying the entire meal visually before munching on the relatively small bites that even the biggest eater can manage. I ended up with three tasty things that I remember well so the reader won’t leave the feast completely unsatisfied: a red mullet, a plate of perfectly stewed mushrooms, and part of a ptarmigan, a bird like a grouse that lives high up in the Scottish mountains, giving it a rich flavor that’s much better than that of farm-raised English game birds. The rest of the delicacies have faded from my memory like the food from Prospero’s banquet after Ariel waved over it. The band played at intervals, encouraging us to keep going, as did the sparkling wines the footmen brought from an endless cellar, which the guests drank with little thought about the unfortunate truth that there’s always a tomorrow morning after each feast. As long as that’s true, a sensible person can never fully enjoy their dinner.

Nearly opposite to me, on the other side of the table, sat a young lady in white, whom I am sorely tempted to describe, but dare not, because not only the supereminence of her beauty, but its peculiar character, would cause the sketch to be recognized, however rudely it might be drawn. I hardly thought that there existed such a woman outside of a picture-frame, or the covers of a romance: not that I had ever met with her resemblance even there, but, being so distinct and singular an apparition; she seemed likelier to find her sisterhood in poetry and picture than in real life. Let us turn away from her, lest a touch too apt should compel her stately and cold and soft and womanly grace to gleam out upon my page with a strange repulsion and unattainableness in the very spell that made her beautiful. At her side, and familiarly attentive to her, sat a gentleman of whom I remember only a hard outline of the nose and forehead, and such a monstrous portent of a beard that you could discover no symptom of a mouth, except, when he opened it to speak, or to put in a morsel of food. Then, indeed, you suddenly became aware of a cave hidden behind the impervious and darksome shrubbery. There could be no doubt who this gentleman and lady were. Any child would have recognized them at a glance. It was Bluebeard and a new wife (the loveliest of the series, but with already a mysterious gloom overshadowing her fair young brow) travelling in their honeymoon, and dining, among other distinguished strangers, at the Lord Mayor's table.

Nearly opposite me, on the other side of the table, sat a young woman in white, whom I’m very tempted to describe, but I won’t, because not only is her beauty outstanding, but its unique nature would make my sketch identifiable, no matter how poorly it was drawn. I hardly believed that such a woman existed outside of a picture frame or a romance novel: not that I’d ever seen anyone like her even there, but because she was such a distinct and unusual sight; she seemed more likely to have her counterparts in poetry and art than in real life. Let’s look away from her, lest a description that’s too accurate should cause her graceful, stately, cold, and soft feminine presence to shine onto my page with an unfamiliar repulsion and an unattainable quality in the very charm that made her beautiful. Beside her, and clearly attentive to her, sat a man of whom I only remember a hard outline of his nose and forehead, and such a huge beard that you couldn’t see any sign of a mouth, except when he opened it to speak or to take a bite of food. Then you would suddenly notice a cave hidden behind the dense, dark shrubbery. There was no doubt who this gentleman and lady were. Any child would recognize them instantly. It was Bluebeard and a new wife (the most beautiful of the lot, but already with a mysterious sadness shadowing her fair young brow) on their honeymoon, dining at the Lord Mayor’s table among other distinguished guests.

After an hour or two of valiant achievement with knife and fork came the dessert; and at the point of the festival where finger-glasses are usually introduced, a large silver basin was carried round to the guests, containing rose-water, into which we dipped the ends of our napkins and were conscious of a delightful fragrance, instead of that heavy and weary odor, the hateful ghost of a defunct dinner. This seems to be an ancient custom of the city, not confined to the Lord Mayor's table, but never met with westward of Temple Bar.

After an hour or two of valiant eating with knife and fork, dessert arrived; and at the time during the celebration when finger bowls are typically passed around, a large silver basin filled with rose water was brought to the guests. We dipped the ends of our napkins into it and enjoyed a lovely fragrance, instead of the heavy and unpleasant smell leftover from dinner. This appears to be an old custom in the city, not just at the Lord Mayor's table, but it's never been seen west of Temple Bar.

During all the feast, in accordance with another ancient custom, the origin or purport of which I do not remember to have heard, there stood a man in armor, with a helmet on his head, behind his Lordship's chair. When the after-dinner wine was placed on the table, still another official personage appeared behind the chair, and proceeded to make a solemn and sonorous proclamation (in which he enumerated the principal guests, comprising three or four noblemen, several baronets, and plenty of generals, members of Parliament, aldermen, and other names of the illustrious, one of which sounded strangely familiar to my ears), ending in some such style as this: "and other gentlemen and ladies, here present, the Lord Mayor drinks to you all in a loving-cup,"—giving a sort, of sentimental twang to the two words,—"and sends it round among you!" And forthwith the loving-cup—several of them, indeed, on each side of the tables—came slowly down with all the antique ceremony.

During the entire feast, following another old tradition, the details of which I can’t quite recall, a man in armor stood with a helmet on his head behind the Lord Mayor's chair. When the wine was served after dinner, another official appeared behind the chair and made a formal and grand announcement, listing the main guests, which included a few noblemen, several baronets, and many generals, MPs, aldermen, and other notable names, one of which sounded oddly familiar to me. He concluded with something like: "And other gentlemen and ladies present, the Lord Mayor raises a toast to you all in a loving cup," giving a sort of sentimental twist to those two words, "and sends it around to you!" Immediately, the loving cup—actually several of them—started making their way slowly down the tables with all the old-fashioned ceremony.

The fashion of it is thus. The Lord Mayor, standing up and taking the covered cup in both hands, presents it to the guest at his elbow, who likewise rises, and removes the cover for his Lordship to drink, which being successfully accomplished, the guest replaces the cover and receives the cup into his own hands. He then presents it to his next neighbor, that the cover may be again removed for himself to take a draught, after which the third person goes through a similar manoeuvre with a fourth, and he with a fifth, until the whole company find themselves inextricably intertwisted and entangled in one complicated chain of love. When the cup came to my hands, I examined it critically, both inside and out, and perceived it to be an antique and richly ornamented silver goblet, capable of holding about a quart of wine. Considering how much trouble we all expended in getting the cup to our lips, the guests appeared to content themselves with wonderfully moderate potations. In truth, nearly or quite the original quart of wine being still in the goblet, it seemed doubtful whether any of the company had more than barely touched the silver rim before passing it to their neighbors,—a degree of abstinence that might be accounted for by a fastidious repugnance to so many compotators in one cup, or possibly by a disapprobation of the liquor. Being curious to know all about these important matters, with a view of recommending to my countrymen whatever they might usefully adopt, I drank an honest sip from the loving-cup, and had no occasion for another,—ascertaining it to be Claret of a poor original quality, largely mingled with water, and spiced and sweetened. It was good enough, however, for a merely spectral or ceremonial drink, and could never have been intended for any better purpose.

The way it works is this. The Lord Mayor, standing up and holding the covered cup with both hands, offers it to the guest next to him, who also stands and removes the cover so his Lordship can drink. Once that's done, the guest puts the cover back on and takes the cup for himself. He then hands it to his next neighbor, who removes the cover to take a drink, and this continues on with each person passing it until the entire group is caught up in a complicated web of camaraderie. When the cup reached me, I examined it closely, both inside and out, and saw that it was an antique, beautifully decorated silver goblet, able to hold about a quart of wine. Considering the effort we all put into getting the cup to our lips, the guests seemed to be satisfied with very modest sips. In fact, it looked like almost the entire quart of wine was still in the goblet, and it seemed unlikely that anyone in the group had more than just barely touched the silver rim before passing it on—an amount of restraint that could be explained by a distaste for sharing one cup among so many, or perhaps disapproval of the drink itself. Since I was curious about these important matters to suggest to my fellow countrymen what they might beneficially adopt, I took a solid sip from the loving cup and found no need for more, discovering that it was poor-quality Claret, mostly watered down and spiced and sweetened. It was good enough for a ceremonial drink but clearly wasn’t meant for anything better.

The toasts now began in the customary order, attended with speeches neither more nor less witty and ingenious than the specimens of table-eloquence which had heretofore delighted me. As preparatory to each new display, the herald, or whatever he was, behind the chair of state, gave awful notice that the Right Honorable the Lord Mayor was about to propose a toast. His Lordship being happily delivered thereof, together with some accompanying remarks, the band played an appropriate tune, and the herald again issued proclamation to the effect that such or such a nobleman, or gentleman, general, dignified clergyman, or what not, was going to respond to the Right Honorable the Lord Mayor's toast; then, if I mistake not, there was another prodigious flourish of trumpets and twanging of stringed instruments; and finally the doomed individual, waiting all this while to be decapitated, got up and proceeded to make a fool of himself. A bashful young earl tried his maiden oratory on the good citizens of London, and having evidently got every word by heart (even including, however he managed it, the most seemingly casual improvisations of the moment), he really spoke like a book, and made incomparably the smoothest speech I ever heard in England.

The toasts began in the usual order, accompanied by speeches that were just as witty and clever as the ones I’d enjoyed before. To kick off each new toast, the announcer, or whatever he was, stood behind the main table and declared that the Right Honorable the Lord Mayor was about to propose a toast. After his Lordship delivered his toast and some additional comments, the band played an appropriate song. Then the announcer proclaimed that a certain nobleman, gentleman, general, dignified clergyman, or whoever it was, was going to respond to the Right Honorable the Lord Mayor's toast. If I remember correctly, there was another grand flourish of trumpets and the strumming of string instruments, and finally, the unfortunate person, who had been waiting all this time, stood up and made a fool of himself. A shy young earl tried out his first speech in front of the good citizens of London, and having clearly memorized every word (even managing the most seemingly casual comments in the moment), he spoke incredibly well and delivered the smoothest speech I’ve ever heard in England.

The weight and gravity of the speakers, not only on this occasion, but all similar ones, was what impressed me as most extraordinary, not to say absurd. Why should people eat a good dinner, and put their spirits into festive trim with Champagne, and afterwards mellow themselves into a most enjoyable state of quietude with copious libations of Sherry and old Port, and then disturb the whole excellent result by listening to speeches as heavy as an after-dinner nap, and in no degree so refreshing? If the Champagne had thrown its sparkle over the surface of these effusions, or if the generous Port had shone through their substance with a ruddy glow of the old English humor, I might have seen a reason for honest gentlemen prattling in their cups, and should undoubtedly have been glad to be a listener. But there was no attempt nor impulse of the kind on the part of the orators, nor apparent expectation of such a phenomenon on that of the audience. In fact, I imagine that the latter were best pleased when the speaker embodied his ideas in the figurative language of arithmetic, or struck upon any hard matter of business or statistics, as a heavy-laden bark bumps upon a rock in mid-ocean. The sad severity, the too earnest utilitarianism, of modern life, have wrought a radical and lamentable change, I am afraid, in this ancient and goodly institution of civic banquets. People used to come to them, a few hundred years ago, for the sake of being jolly; they come now with an odd notion of pouring sober wisdom into their wine by way of wormwood-bitters, and thus make such a mess of it that the wine and wisdom reciprocally spoil one another.

The weight and seriousness of the speakers, not just on this occasion but at all similar events, struck me as truly remarkable, if not ridiculous. Why should people enjoy a nice dinner, lift their spirits with Champagne, and then relax into a pleasant state of calm with generous amounts of Sherry and old Port, only to ruin the whole experience by listening to speeches that are as dull as an after-dinner nap and not even half as refreshing? If the Champagne had added some sparkle to these speeches, or if the rich Port had brought out a warm glow of old English humor, I might have found a reason to listen to them chatting away in their cups, and I would have happily enjoyed it. But there was no sign of that kind of spirit from the speakers, nor any expectation of it from the audience. In fact, I think the audience was probably happiest when the speaker expressed their thoughts using the dry language of numbers, or tackled some dense business or statistics, like a heavily loaded ship hitting a rock in the middle of the ocean. The sad seriousness and overzealous practicality of modern life have, I fear, made a drastic and unfortunate change to this age-old tradition of civic banquets. People used to attend these gatherings, a few hundred years ago, just for fun; now they come with a strange idea of pouring sober wisdom into their wine like some bitter remedy, creating such a mess that the wine and wisdom end up ruining each other.

Possibly, the foregoing sentiments have taken a spice of acridity from a circumstance that happened about this stage of the feast, and very much interrupted my own further enjoyment of it. Up to this time, my condition had been exceedingly felicitous, both on account of the brilliancy of the scene, and because I was in close proximity with three very pleasant English friends. One of them was a lady, whose honored name my readers would recognize as a household word, if I dared write it; another, a gentleman, likewise well known to them, whose fine taste, kind heart, and genial cultivation are qualities seldom mixed in such happy proportion as in him. The third was the man to whom I owed most in England, the warm benignity of whose nature was never weary of doing me good, who led me to many scenes of life, in town, camp, and country, which I never could have found out for myself, who knew precisely the kind of help a stranger needs, and gave it as freely as if he had not had a thousand more important things to live for. Thus I never felt safer or cosier at anybody's fireside, even my own, than at the dinner-table of the Lord Mayor.

Possibly, the feelings I've shared have been influenced by something that happened around this point in the celebration, which really interrupted my enjoyment of it. Up to now, I had been extremely happy, both because of the beauty of the scene and because I was close to three very enjoyable English friends. One of them was a lady whose esteemed name my readers would recognize immediately, if I felt it was appropriate to mention it; another was a gentleman, also well-known to them, whose great taste, kind heart, and friendly demeanor are qualities that rarely come together so perfectly as in him. The third was the person to whom I owed the most in England, whose warm nature was always eager to help me, guiding me to many life experiences in the city, the camp, and the countryside that I would never have discovered on my own. He understood exactly the kind of support a stranger needs and offered it as generously as if he didn’t have a thousand more important things to focus on. So, I never felt safer or cozier at anyone's home, even my own, than at the dinner table of the Lord Mayor.

Out of this serene sky came a thunderbolt. His Lordship got up and proceeded to make some very eulogistic remarks upon "the literary and commercial"—I question whether those two adjectives were ever before married by a copulative conjunction, and they certainly would not live together in illicit intercourse, of their own accord—"the literary and commercial attainments of an eminent gentleman there present," and then went on to speak of the relations of blood and interest between Great Britain and the aforesaid eminent gentleman's native country. Those bonds were more intimate than had ever before existed between two great nations, throughout all history, and his Lordship felt assured that that whole honorable company would join him in the expression of a fervent wish that they might be held inviolably sacred, on both sides of the Atlantic, now and forever. Then came the same wearisome old toast, dry and hard to chew upon as a musty sea-biscuit, which had been the text of nearly all the oratory of my public career. The herald sonorously announced that Mr. So-and-so would now respond to his Right Honorable Lordship's toast and speech, the trumpets sounded the customary flourish for the onset, there was a thunderous rumble of anticipatory applause, and finally a deep silence sank upon the festive hall.

Out of this calm sky came a thunderbolt. His Lordship stood up and started to make some very flattering comments about "the literary and commercial"—I doubt those two adjectives have ever been combined with a conjunction before, and they certainly wouldn’t get along in an illicit affair on their own—"the literary and commercial achievements of an esteemed gentleman present," and then went on to discuss the family and financial ties between Great Britain and the aforementioned gentleman's home country. Those connections were closer than ever before in history between two great nations, and his Lordship was confident that the entire honorable company would join him in expressing a heartfelt wish that they would remain inviolably sacred, on both sides of the Atlantic, now and forever. Then came the same tedious old toast, dry and tough to swallow like an aged sea-biscuit, which had been the theme of nearly all the speeches of my public career. The herald loudly announced that Mr. So-and-so would now respond to his Right Honorable Lordship's toast and speech, the trumpets sounded their usual flourish for the start, there was a thunderous wave of anticipatory applause, and finally a deep silence fell over the festive hall.

All this was a horrid piece of treachery on the Lord Mayor's part, after beguiling me within his lines on a pledge of safe-conduct; and it seemed very strange that he could not let an unobtrusive individual eat his dinner in peace, drink a small sample of the Mansion House wine, and go away grateful at heart for the old English hospitality. If his Lordship had sent me an infusion of ratsbane in the loving-cup, I should have taken it much more kindly at his hands. But I suppose the secret of the matter to have been somewhat as follows.

All of this was a terrible act of betrayal by the Lord Mayor, after luring me into his territory with a promise of safety; and it felt very odd that he couldn't allow a discreet person to enjoy his dinner in peace, sip a bit of the Mansion House wine, and leave feeling thankful for the traditional English hospitality. If his Lordship had offered me a drink laced with poison, I would have accepted it more graciously from him. But I guess the real reason for this was something like the following.

All England, just then, was in one of those singular fits of panic excitement (not fear, though as sensitive and tremulous as that emotion), which, in consequence of the homogeneous character of the people, their intense patriotism, and their dependence for their ideas in public affairs on other sources than their own examination and individual thought, are more sudden, pervasive, and unreasoning than any similar mood of our own public. In truth, I have never seen the American public in a state at all similar, and believe that we are incapable of it. Our excitements are not impulsive, like theirs, but, right or wrong, are moral and intellectual. For example, the grand rising of the North, at the commencement of this war, bore the aspect of impulse and passion only because it was so universal, and necessarily done in a moment, just as the quiet and simultaneous getting-up of a thousand people out of their chairs would cause a tumult that might be mistaken for a storm. We were cool then, and have been cool ever since, and shall remain cool to the end, which we shall take coolly, whatever it may be. There is nothing which the English find it so difficult to understand in us as this characteristic. They imagine us, in our collective capacity, a kind of wild beast, whose normal condition is savage fury, and are always looking for the moment when we shall break through the slender barriers of international law and comity, and compel the reasonable part of the world, with themselves at the head, to combine for the purpose of putting us into a stronger cage. At times this apprehension becomes so powerful (and when one man feels it, a million do), that it resembles the passage of the wind over a broad field of grain, where you see the whole crop bending and swaying beneath one impulse, and each separate stalk tossing with the selfsame disturbance as its myriad companions. At such periods all Englishmen talk with a terrible identity of sentiment and expression. You have the whole country in each man; and not one of them all, if you put him strictly to the question, can give a reasonable ground for his alarm. There are but two nations in the world—our own country and France—that can put England into this singular state. It is the united sensitiveness of a people extremely well-to-do, careful of their country's honor, most anxious for the preservation of the cumbrous and moss-grown prosperity which they have been so long in consolidating, and incompetent (owing to the national half-sightedness, and their habit of trusting to a few leading minds for their public opinion) to judge when that prosperity is really threatened.

All of England was caught up in one of those unique fits of panic-filled excitement (not quite fear, but just as sensitive and shaky), which, due to the uniform character of the people, their strong patriotism, and their reliance on outside sources for their views on public issues rather than their own analysis and thought, is more sudden, widespread, and irrational than any similar feeling in our public. Honestly, I’ve never seen the American public in a comparable state, and I believe we’re incapable of it. Our excitements aren't impulsive like theirs; whether right or wrong, they are moral and intellectual. For example, the grand uprising of the North at the start of this war seemed impulsive and passionate only because it was so widespread and happened all at once, just as a thousand people getting up from their chairs may create a ruckus that could be mistaken for a storm. We were calm then, we’ve been calm ever since, and we’ll continue to be calm to the end, which we will take in stride, whatever it turns out to be. The English find it incredibly hard to understand this quality in us. They see us, as a group, as some kind of wild beast, whose natural state is savage rage, and they’re always waiting for the moment when we might break through the fragile boundaries of international law and courtesy and force the rational part of the world, with themselves leading the way, to unite to put us in a stronger cage. Sometimes this fear grows so intense (and when one person feels it, millions do) that it’s like the wind sweeping across a wide field of grain, where you see the entire crop bending and swaying under one impulse, and each stalk moving with the same disturbance as countless others. At such times, all Englishmen speak with a strikingly uniform sentiment and expression. You get the entire country in each individual; and not one of them, if pressed for an explanation, can provide a reasonable basis for their fear. There are only two nations in the world—ours and France—that can put England into this strange state. It’s the combined sensitivity of a fairly well-off people, protective of their country’s honor, deeply concerned for the preservation of the cumbersome, old-fashioned prosperity they’ve spent so long building, and incapable (due to national shortsightedness and their tendency to rely on a few leading minds for public opinion) of realizing when that prosperity is genuinely at risk.

If the English were accustomed to look at the foreign side of any international dispute, they might easily have satisfied themselves that there was very little danger of a war at that particular crisis, from the simple circumstance that their own Government had positively not an inch of honest ground to stand upon, and could not fail to be aware of the fact. Neither could they have met Parliament with any show of a justification for incurring war. It was no such perilous juncture as exists now, when law and right are really controverted on sustainable or plausible grounds, and a naval commander may at any moment fire off the first cannon of a terrible contest. If I remember it correctly, it was a mere diplomatic squabble, in which the British ministers, with the politic generosity which they are in the habit of showing towards their official subordinates, had tried to browbeat us for the purpose of sustaining an ambassador in an indefensible proceeding; and the American Government (for God had not denied us an administration of statesmen then) had retaliated with stanch courage and exquisite skill, putting inevitably a cruel mortification upon their opponents, but indulging them with no pretence whatever for active resentment.

If the English had been used to considering the foreign side of any international dispute, they could have easily realized that there was very little chance of war at that moment, simply because their own Government had no valid reason to engage in conflict and must have known that. They also couldn’t have presented Parliament with any justification for starting a war. It wasn’t a critical situation like the one we have now, where law and justice are genuinely disputed on solid or believable grounds, and a naval commander could spark a major conflict at any time. If I remember correctly, it was just a minor diplomatic conflict, where the British ministers, with the usual calculated generosity they show toward their officials, attempted to intimidate us to support an ambassador in an indefensible action; yet the American Government (thankfully, we had a competent administration of statesmen back then) responded with strong courage and impressive skill, inevitably causing a painful embarrassment for their opponents while giving them no reason at all for active resentment.

Now the Lord Mayor, like any other Englishman, probably fancied that War was on the western gale, and was glad to lay hold of even so insignificant an American as myself, who might be made to harp on the rusty old strings of national sympathies, identity of blood and interest, and community of language and literature, and whisper peace where there was no peace, in however weak an utterance. And possibly his Lordship thought, in his wisdom, that the good feeling which was sure to be expressed by a company of well-bred Englishmen, at his august and far-famed dinner-table, might have an appreciable influence on the grand result. Thus, when the Lord Mayor invited me to his feast, it was a piece of strategy. He wanted to induce me to fling myself, like a lesser Curtius, with a larger object of self-sacrifice, into the chasm of discord between England and America, and, on my ignominious demur, had resolved to shove me in with his own right-honorable hands, in the hope of closing up the horrible pit forever. On the whole, I forgive his Lordship. He meant well by all parties,—himself, who would share the glory, and me, who ought to have desired nothing better than such an heroic opportunity,—his own country, which would continue to get cotton and breadstuffs, and mine, which would get everything that men work with and wear.

Now the Lord Mayor, like any other Englishman, probably thought that War was on the western wind, and was happy to grab hold of even a minor American like me, who could be used to play on the tired old themes of national sympathy, shared ancestry and interests, and a common language and literature, and to whisper peace where there was none, even if it was a weak attempt. And maybe his Lordship believed, in his wisdom, that the goodwill expressed by a group of polite Englishmen at his prestigious and famous dinner table could positively impact the larger situation. So, when the Lord Mayor invited me to his feast, it was tactical. He wanted to push me, like a lesser Curtius, into the deep divide between England and America as a greater act of self-sacrifice, and upon my unwillingness to jump in, he had decided to shove me in with his own esteemed hands, hoping to close the dreadful gap once and for all. Overall, I forgive his Lordship. He had good intentions for everyone involved—himself, who would enjoy the glory, and me, who should have wanted nothing more than such a noble chance—his own country, which would keep receiving cotton and food supplies, and mine, which would get everything people work with and wear.

As soon as the Lord Mayor began to speak, I rapped upon my mind, and it gave forth a hollow sound, being absolutely empty of appropriate ideas. I never thought of listening to the speech, because I knew it all beforehand in twenty repetitions from other lips, and was aware that it would not offer a single suggestive point. In this dilemma, I turned to one of my three friends, a gentleman whom I knew to possess an enviable flow of silver speech, and obtested him, by whatever he deemed holiest, to give me at least an available thought or two to start with, and, once afloat, I would trust to my guardian-angel for enabling me to flounder ashore again. He advised me to begin with some remarks complimentary to the Lord Mayor, and expressive of the hereditary reverence in which his office was held,—at least, my friend thought that there would be no harm in giving his Lordship this little sugar-plum, whether quite the fact or no,—was held by the descendants of the Puritan forefathers. Thence, if I liked, getting flexible with the oil of my own eloquence, I might easily slide off into the momentous subject of the relations between England and America, to which his Lordship had made such weighty allusion.

As soon as the Lord Mayor started speaking, I tapped into my mind, and it echoed back to me, completely empty of any relevant ideas. I didn't bother listening to the speech because I had already heard it a dozen times from other people and knew it wouldn’t provide a single interesting point. Stuck in this situation, I turned to one of my three friends, a guy I knew was great with words, and begged him, by whatever he held sacred, to give me at least one good idea to start with, and once I got going, I’d rely on my guardian angel to help me find my way back. He suggested I kick things off with some compliments for the Lord Mayor, highlighting the respect his office commands—at least, my friend figured there was no harm in giving his Lordship this little flattery, even if it wasn't completely true, considering how it was viewed by the descendants of the Puritan ancestors. From there, if I liked, I could smoothly transition into the important topic of the relationship between England and America, which his Lordship had referenced so significantly.

Seizing this handful of straw with a death-grip, and bidding my three friends bury me honorably, I got upon my legs to save both countries, or perish in the attempt. The tables roared and thundered at me, and suddenly were silent again. But, as I have never happened to stand in a position of greater dignity and peril, I deem it a stratagem of sage policy here to close these Sketches, leaving myself still erect in so heroic an attitude.

Gripping this handful of straw tightly and asking my three friends to give me a proper burial, I stood up to save both nations or die trying. The tables shook and rumbled at me, but then went quiet again. However, since I've never been in a situation of greater dignity and danger, I think it's wise to end these sketches here, leaving myself still standing in such a heroic pose.

THE END








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